We're Not Gonna Take It: a Youth's Tool Bag of Essential Life Skills: For Transitioning from High School to Post-secondary Education to Workplace

WE’RE

NOT GONNA

TAKE IT

A youth’s toolbag

of essential life skills

for transitioning

from high school to

post-secondary education

to the workplace

SANDRA FINKELSTEIN

Copyright © 2013 (ebook edition) by Sandra Finkelstein

The right of Sandra Finkelstein to be identified as author of this Work has been asserted by her in accordance with the Canadian Intellectual Property Office of Canada.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in retrieval system, copied in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise transmitted without written permission from the publisher. You must not circulate this book in any format.

Disclaimer: this book is licensed to assist and guide you on your journey from high school to the workplace; it includes references of other people’s thoughts and/or their work which is in alignment with the author’s work. This ebook may not be resold or given away to other people. If you would like to give share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. Please respect the hard work of this author.

ebook edition

Also issued in print format.

Find out more go to www.2bempowered.com or www.voicesofyouth.ca

Ebook preparation by Kim Monteforte, WeMakeBooks.ca

Edited by Laura Pratt

Table of Contents

Foreword

Acknowledgement

My Personal Mission

Part I 10 ESSENTIAL LIFE SKILLS

Value of life skills, mistakes and being responsible

Life skill 1: Decision-Making

Life skill 2: Effective Communication

Life skill 3: Leadership

Life skill 4: Teamwork and Collaboration

Life skill 5: Building Relationships and Networking

Life skill 6: Requesting, Giving and Receiving Feedback

Life skill 7: The Art of Storytelling: create your story

Life skill 8: Being in the Moment

Life skill 9: Intention-Creation and Goal-Setting

Life skill 10: Financial Awareness and Literacy

Part II APPLYING LIFE CHOICES & EDUCATION ROI

Part III GUIDES, COACHING & MENTORING

Part IV LEARNING & EARNING

Part V GRADUATING & TRANSITIONING INTO THE WORKFORCE

Part VI ACTION STEPS FOR FINDING A JOB

Part VII CALL TO ACTION FOR CHANGE

Foreword

This handbook is the perfect aid for young people growing up in today’s world. As a teenager, I often hear people saying that the world expects more from me and my contemporaries, but it’s hard for us to improve when we’re not given any guidance on where or how to do so. This handbook provides important direction for teenagers seeking guidance in school and the workplace, but also in life.

Parents who lack knowledge about today’s education system will also benefit from this book. It explores the post-secondary options available to their children, and offers invaluable assistance to them for counselling their offspring through the many challenges in developing a career path. But it also explains why making mistakes is part of the learning process and why parents who make decisions for their teens can be detrimental to their journey.

The 10 life skills introduced in this handbook are fundamental not only to the destination but to the process of maturing into a well-rounded, knowledgeable and professional adult. These skills are not taught in school, but are crucial to succeed in today’s world. Mastering them will differentiate you from your competitors in school and the working world.

The keys to being successful in post-secondary education, whether it be college or university, are discipline, planning, and being open to change and accepting of new things. The handbook will help you make the transition from high school to university or college. It will guide you as you develop a personal blueprint for change and aid you in filling in the blank spaces as you grow. Your blueprint will help you chart a course and solve life’s five Ws, namely: who, what, when, where and why do I need to change?

Confucius says, A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

So go ahead, take the first step, read the book, enjoy the journey and be part of the change.

— L. Taylor Ber, 18, Toronto, Canada

When my friendship with Sandra began (in the spring of 2011 when I was involved with the Markham Youth Council and Sandra’s organization approached us for used sports and leisure equipment for families in need), I was 26 years old and working part-time in the hospitality industry. Today, I have a full-time position with Marriott Hotels, where I was recently promoted to the role of front desk manager. Sandra and I have kept in touch over the years, and she’s turned to me a number of times for guidance regarding her youth work.

I had the pleasure of reading through Sandra’s book during the development phase and found that I could easily relate to the content. During my time in the public school system, I wasn’t taught important life skills like how to manage finances or apply for a job. After graduating from college, I struggled to find my way in the real world.

Sandra’s book will help young people to prepare for life after school. My hope for it is that it reaches as many of them as possible so that they won’t have to face the struggles I did after graduation because I wasn’t fully prepared. I found the art of storytelling, job search and financial literacy sections to be the most useful.

And I love how Sandra pushes the idea of speaking your truth and standing up for what you believe in. I can recall many times in my youth when I had great ideas to share, but didn’t have the confidence to stand up and do so. This was especially the case if it meant presenting my thoughts to an adult or authority figure.

I’d like to think that if this handbook was around when I was in my late teens, I wouldn’t have had such a difficult time finding my way in the real world after graduation.

— Jimmy Budny, 28, Toronto, Canada

Acknowledgement

We are, all of us, only as good as the sum of our parts. While I was the one who undertook the physical writing of this handbook, it has in fact been a collaboration of the efforts of many people. I have been toiling with a youth project since 2004, but could never have anticipated that the results of those efforts would deliver me to a forum that would allow me to have such a great impact on such a large number of people. In late 2011, a friend encouraged me to write a book. I couldn’t even fathom such an idea, and told him as much. Then came the inspiration from my children Isaac and Alec. My younger one Alec, who challenges everything that doesn’t make sense in his mind, was my impetus to sit down and put pen to paper. It would not simply be a book geared to the millennial youth, but a resourceful guidebook that would furnish our children with essential tools for learning and applying life skills, challenging systems and making the changes for which the world is crying today. This impulse was reinforced in me as I began researching the post-recession political and social landscape that was emerging for our youth, and realized how much it genuinely frightened and appalled me. Ultimately, I could no longer sit by and watch as this world was handed down to my — and all of our — children. I decided to write a book.

At the end of one year, I had written 300 pages. And there was still so much to say. On the advice of mentors and guides, I decided to break the material into four distinct books. Today, you hold in your hand the first of the quartet. And I couldn’t be more proud. I want to thank the many people who had a hand in creating it, namely: Isaac and Alec Finkelstein, Paul Brown, Randee Sorbo, Lynn Knowles, Anna Gabrielli, Fina Scroppo, Susan Chilton, Laura Pratt, Heidy Lawrence, Jimmy Budny, L. Taylor Ber, Jeff Rayman, Michael Badham, the countless people to whom I’ve turned for a taste of their knowledge and experience, and all the supporters I’ve encountered in the course of its creation. I am so grateful for your love and support, from the dotting of my i’s to the choosing of my cover. I hope the results speak to you every bit as they do me.

All my love, Sandra

My Personal Mission

We’re Not Gonna Take It is a call to action to the millennial youth of today. I have directed this handbook at young people between the ages of 15 and 25, to provide them with essential tools, life skills and resources for guidance in this precarious time as they maneuver from high school into post-secondary education and finally transition into the workplace. You, the generation most in peril of losing its way, can no longer stand by and accept what you’re being handed. It is time to stand up, speak up, speak out and become innovators and the creators of what you want. Achieving this will mean working in a system that, in many ways, no longer serves you or your country (but will take years to meaningfully change). So be it. It also means being accountable and responsible and walking your walk. It can be tough but you are not alone. This handbook is full of information, exercises, questions, suggestions and action steps designed to move you along the route of your success.

In order to create what you desire, you must know from where you start.

Your generation has been variously termed by others as Gen Y, the echo boomers, millennials and, most recently, the lost generation. In order to navigate in these stressful times, you must first be aware of the landscape that defines them. For those who live in Canada and the developed world, you live in an environment that has been created by, and for, the baby boomers. This sweeping reality includes our education system, hiring practices and workplace values. The economic downturn of 2008-09 hit the world hard, and arguably its youth most of all. According to an Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD) report, it left nearly 75 million of the world’s young people either unemployed or, arguably worse, underemployed in 2011. Still, many will argue that you in North America are better off than your counterparts in Greece, Spain and a slew of other European countries, which suffered unemployment rates of over 50 percent, while you only endured 16.4 percent at the height in July 2009, according to Statistics Canada research, which reported a 14.7 percent unemployment rate in February 2012. And others will remind you that you’re better off than the 15-to-24-year-olds who experienced the recession in Canada in 1983 and in 1992, when 19.2 percent and 17.2 percent, respectively, were unemployed.

But the difference today, you might advise these bystanders, is that the social climate has changed forever, and so the unemployment — and, more importantly, the underemployment — rate represents an ever-shrinking piece of the puzzle.

An undergraduate degree is the new high school diploma. That revised reality means that the well-educated are pushing the 15-to-19-year-olds out of jobs. More than that, the return on investment (ROI) for education is being questioned outright. After all, the cost is going up and the amount you can earn at the end of it all is going down.

Lauren Friese, the founder of TalentEgg (http://talentegg.ca), created an online service to provide access to meaningful opportunities for students and new grads across Canada while also offering an efficient way for employers and organizations to reach students and new grads. She launched TalentEgg.ca following her return to Canada in 2008 after receiving an M.Sc. in economic history at the London School of Economics. She saw that the UK had a multitude of services to help students when transitioning into the workplace, while Canada offered little help in this arena, and it’s still a mess. The website was designed to implement some of UK’s efficiencies in Canada. In an article titled, The Kids Are Not Alright, published March 29, 2011, she explained, We facilitate a system in which, according to Statistics Canada, more than 75 percent of students enroll in programs or institutions that — from ‘our’ experience at TalentEgg.ca — it seems only about 10 percent of employees are willing to hire from. Given that alarming assessment, along with the $20,000-to-$30,000 average of student debt with which graduates enter the working world, it’s more imperative than ever to do your investigation prior to choosing a post-secondary or post-graduate career path.

One startling fact on this plane is the level of illiteracy amongst our youth. According to a Statistics Canada-sponsored 2003 international adult literacy survey, 37.8 percent of Canadians aged 16 to 25 did not have the literacy or essential skills required to function well in today’s knowledge-based economy. Literacy is crucial. It impacts your ability to fill out job applications and conduct effective interviews and sell yourself to a potential employer. And with the rise in immigration, this number likely has not decreased.

To me, the greatest looming concern for this population is underemployment. Of the 17 countries that are part of the OECD, Canada has the dubious distinction of posting the highest rates of youth underemployment. From the moment you first set foot in school, you’ve been fed a steady diet of drawing a direct line between getting a good education and being rewarded with meaningful work and success. This equation no longer exists, at least for many. Rather, today, you’re experiencing what economist Francis Fong terms the boomerang effect. Here, university grads, unable to find jobs in their field of study, retreat to another degree or job that can support them but not put their training to use. He says it can take as many as 10 to 15 years to close the gap of reduced wages. More than that, it can affect your lifetime earnings and, ultimately, your retirement savings.

The new reality is that this is not going to change any time soon. Even baby boomers have been knocked down by the recent recession. Many have had to work, either by choice or force, to recoup the financial losses they experienced in the recent downturn. This group of the world’s workforce is thus holding fast to jobs that would otherwise be the prizes for those younger than them coming up the ranks. Globalization has also shipped jobs abroad to developing countries, a move that’s produced increased competition not just from those graduating, but also from those who’ve been downsized and have many years of experience under their belts.

So what now? Well, you can sit back and watch this horror movie unfold, or you can push your way into the projection room and demand a new movie. You are part of the answer, after all. The future of Canada’s prosperity, and that of the world for that matter, is in your hands. And there are tremendous economic, social and health costs associated with your delaying your entry into the market.

In this book, you will find the life skills, resources and tools that will allow you to succeed and create value for yourself personally and professionally. With it, you can develop the soft skills that are so desired by companies — but that many of your peers are lacking because you were not taught them in school. This book is a passionate call to arms to start the process of challenging our systems. You are the trailblazers for my children. I will not stand by and watch the world fall apart, just as it’s being handed down to them. I will stand beside you, encourage you and support you in this journey.

It’s time now to step up your game and declare the mantra: "We’re not gonna take it."

PART I: 10 ESSENTIAL LIFE SKILLS

Learning the Value of the 10 Essential Life Skills, Making Mistakes and Being Accountable for Our Actions

Life skills and soft skills

Life skills are crucial to your success. These are the skills that you will use every day in your personal life, your work life and whenever you’re faced with having to make a so-called life decision. Where you will not find these skills at play, however, is in the education system. Unfortunately, many of these critical soft skills are not taught in school despite their fierce desirability by future employers. While the technical skills of reading, writing, science and math are important, it’s your mastery of the soft skills that will differentiate you from the next person. This is especially true when applying for summer work, a part-time job, a co-op position, a mentorship program and so forth. And in spite of a 15- or 16-year-old’s difficulty in grasping the relevance of this truth, the reality is that, the younger you are when you embrace these life skills, the more likely they’ll become second nature. Learn to become an effective writer, communicator, leader and problem-solver early, and you will forever be.

Mistakes and failures

Fully embracing the task of learning life skills means taking the risk of making mistakes and experiencing failure. That’s right. Learning a new skill takes time and practice. Sure, the skill may come more easily to some than to others, but you must be prepared to understand that it might mean overcoming your fear. It might also mean making huge mistakes, learning from them, and then going back and doing it again. It is by first taking chances, after all, that we eventually succeed.

In your life up to this point, it’s likely that you have not been given this opportunity to fail and learn. Don’t be afraid to take that first step toward risk. Society regards failure and mistakes as bad things; this cannot be further from the truth. Any major advancement in our society has been the product of someone taking a risk, failing, learning from the experience and tweaking until they do it again right. And so don’t be hard on yourself if you find learning a skill difficult. You are not alone. Know that the more you do it, the easier it will become.

Accountability and responsibility

This means putting two feet in. Learning a life skill (or any skill for that matter) requires your full commitment. Failing is not the result of not fully trying; it’s the result of not fully committing. This is likely an area in which you lack sufficient awareness. I will admit that, for the most