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  • Isl Interaction 13

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    Ain Asilah
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    The document summarizes the key points made in a paragraph about how excessive drug use can lead to death, and provides criticism and corrections. The paragraph states that excessive drug use can damage the body's internal systems and that drugs contain chemicals like nicotine, cocaine and marijuana that have bad effects. It also says that being too stressed about buying expensive drugs can lead to suicide. The criticism notes that the paragraph lacks examples and elaboration, and suggests adding details about organ damage and diseases. It also corrects a grammatical error and recommends a concluding sentence.

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    The document summarizes the key points made in a paragraph about how excessive drug use can lead to death, and provides criticism and corrections. The paragraph states that excessive drug use can damage the body's internal systems and that drugs contain chemicals like nicotine, cocaine and marijuana that have bad effects. It also says that being too stressed about buying expensive drugs can lead to suicide. The criticism notes that the paragraph lacks examples and elaboration, and suggests adding details about organ damage and diseases. It also corrects a grammatical error and recommends a concluding sentence.

    Copyright:

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    5 views1 page

    Isl Interaction 13

    Uploaded by

    Ain Asilah
    The document summarizes the key points made in a paragraph about how excessive drug use can lead to death, and provides criticism and corrections. The paragraph states that excessive drug use can damage the body's internal systems and that drugs contain chemicals like nicotine, cocaine and marijuana that have bad effects. It also says that being too stressed about buying expensive drugs can lead to suicide. The criticism notes that the paragraph lacks examples and elaboration, and suggests adding details about organ damage and diseases. It also corrects a grammatical error and recommends a concluding sentence.

    Copyright:

    Attribution Non-Commercial (BY-NC)
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    ISL INTERACTION 13 PARAGRAPH BY SYAZWANI ZAKARIA AND FATIN IZZATI JASLI Death is also a result of taking much drugs.

    First, excessive taking of drugs can ruin the internal system of the persons body. In addition, drug contains many chemical substances that can give bad effect to our body such as nicotine, cocaine and marijuana. Futhermore, too much stressed to buy expensive drugs can lead the drug addict to a suicide. CRITIC BY NURAINI MOHD NOORDIN, NUR AIN ASILAH NOOR AZAM AND NURUL FASIHAH MOHD TAMIZI 1- The paragraph had 3 supporting details. But, the problem is no further elaboration or explaination on the points from the supporting details. No examples stated. Correction : a) Organs like lungs, trachea, heart and others would not functioning well due to drugs. b) All those substances may lead to harmful diseases. c) The addicts will find that drugs caused them a lot of many and at some point the will feel burden to fulfil their needs. Then, the best way to overcome is by commit sicide. 2- Paragraph above also had some grammatical error. The error had been highlighted as shown above. Correction : bad effects 3- Lastly, the paragraph also do not have concluding sentence. Correction : Thus, drugs can cause death to people especially when taking it excessively.

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