Phallen Marya

1 Day
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My first time being a mom

It was November of 2005and I just found out I would be, not only a single

teen, but also a first time mom. From the very first day of pregnancy to the last

second, I was overwhelmed with doubt that I wouldn't be a wonderful mother. I

had no idea how to deliver a baby, hold him, feed him or change his diapers. I was

concerned I would never get those "motherly instincts" everyone spoke so fondly of.

I was frightened that I would never be able to get a secondary education and raise a

child at the same time. Most of all, I feared I wouldn't have the energy to care for

my child appropriately.

A week after having my son I realized I finally had those motherly instincts. I

would wake up just as my son started to stir before feeding time. I could tell by his

cry what he wanted, whether he was hungry or was in need of a dry diaper; I could

change his diapers blindfolded with one hand behind my back! I had the ability to

recognize the source of a problem and resolve it, even though he couldn't tell me

what was hurting or why he was upset. I like to think of myself, and all other moms,

as a new breed of super hero; Super Mom! Being able to wake, with 2 hours of

sleep, at the sound of a six pound baby rustling around in the next room or wearing

a shirt all day covered with baby powder with splotches of spit up is commendable
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to say the least. Slowly, I developed those instincts that mothers get that allows

them to care for their children appropriately. It was one less thing I worried about.

The next endeavor was educating myself in order to be successful and earn

enough money so I could raise a child. With my son's constant demands of

attention, getting into everything, making messes, and dispersing toys throughout

the house, I never thought school was an option. I was unsure if school would allow

me to have enough quality time with my child or if I had the patience to be

employed, a mother and a student. School is the only way I can make it in the

world today. Not only do I rely on myself, but my child relies on me as well. What I

choose to do on a daily basis impacts my son's life directly, not just me anymore.

My day starts at six in the morning and ends at nearly twelve midnight. Every day

of my life as a mother, has been long and strenuous; but is well worth it. If it wasn't

for having a kid, I still wouldn't be going to college. Now, I have a reason to

succeed, motivation to run off of 3 hours of sleep and someone inspiring me to

accomplish, what were once, unobtainablegoals. Having a baby did not keep me

from going to school as I originally feared it would, it has only encouraged me to

succeed to the best of my ability.

Being a mother is a full-time job in itself. It is physically and emotionally

draining. You don't get sick days, paid vacations or holidays off. Moms work

twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, and three-hundred sixty-five days out

of the year, with very little sleep. We prove everyday that sleep isn't necessary for

human life, the longest a man has gone without sleep is eleven days, mom's go a

minimum of eighteen years surviving on nothing but disrupted catnaps! Raising a

child is tiring and extremely demanding. Some days I feel as if I am merelya pair of

hands, "Mommy eat!", "Get it!", "Open it!", etc. All I get is blank stares, vague
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responses, if any at all, and by the end of the day one side of my shirt is always

longer than the other, from the constant tugging for attention. I've come to realize I

am invisible. My child doesn't see that I am doing the dishes, sweeping or mopping.

I could be doing a handstand in the middle of the room and my son doesn't see that

I'm doing it. To him I am the waitress that serves the food, the guide on TV that

ensures Blue's Clues is on and a chauffeur that takes him to the park;he doesn't

see me at all. Mothers eat their dinner standing up, cold, half chewed and spit back

on their plate, have no privacy and seldom sleep a full night through. But nothing

I've ever done has been so rewarding. There is, without a doubt, nothing like a

mother's love for their child and vice versa. If it wasn't for those short, random

bursts of gratitude and love that my son shows, on a blue moon, I wouldn't be able

to do it. I have ample amounts of energy in order to care for my son accordingly.

All in all, my life has only blossomed since I had my child, it was then that I

truly knew what life was all about. I am an expert on the necessities and routines a

baby needs and have instincts that help me to protect my child from danger. My

son has helped me find my love for teaching small children; I enrolled as a full-time

student and working on my AA in elementary education. Furthering my education is

no longer a bar set too high for me. Everything is obtainable if you really want it. I

have more energy than I've ever had, my life is a high speed chase for dreams and

desires. Being a mom is by far the best decision I've ever made. I've learned to be

the best person I can be under any circumstances, and to strive to live my life to the

fullest, not letting one day go by without trying to live the best way I can, for my

child and for myself.