F ra n ke n s te in Revisions

For your revisions, |ou will be editing your paper fot the following, corffnon errors. Everything in your tevised p^per that you changed should be bolded. You will also need to add a colnment for each change that explains how/why your change enhances your PaPer.

In order to demonstrate the most colnmon etrors, I asked Ftankensteints monstet to wdte sorne analyses of the first few pages of lf,/utheingHeigbfr. As he didn't do such a good job, I had Victot
Ftankenstein tevise his monstet's examples to meet my exPectations.

Area 1: ttlJsestt
Please refer to the !7aldo tevision sheet ftom yout sonnet in-class essay

if you need to temember the

changes here.

Creatue's Example: By using a:: ominous tone to depict the houses, Btonte establishes a dark mood sutounding the house, which patallels the relationship of Cathedne and Heathcliff.
Itrfdte Yout Own Revision:

Area 2: Tone
Tone was mentioned in one of two ways in most students' papets: 1) a bdef mention as a way to check that box off the papet rcquirernents or 2) noted within one or two quoations. Truly 6g151a1rling papets not only established the tone, oftentimes within a specific quotation, but also explahed what tle signi.ficance of that specific
tone
s7as.

Cteatute's Example:

\Vhen Heathcliff first interacts with Lockwood, he speaks to Lockwood in a hostile tone: "Tbrushctoss Gtange is my own, sir,' he interupted, wincing. 'I should not allow any one to inconvenience me, if I could hindet it - walk

i"!"'0).
Victot's Example: Lockwood expands on how Heathcliff s declaration to temove any doubts as to Heathcliff s hostility towards him: "The 'walk in' was uttered with closed teeth, and expressed the sentiment, 'Go to tle Deuce:' even the gat ovet which he leant manifest no sympatlising movement" (1). By expanding on Heatlcliffs delivery of his invitation to Lockwood, Btonte firmly esablishes the bittet, detached manner in which Heathcliff intetacts with a complete stanget, giving a clear depiction of the unwelcoming landlotd in his 6rst moments of dialogue in the novel Victor's Comment: \Vhile the Monster's example merely hdicates Heathcliffs "hostile" tone, mine discusses his alienation ftom society, a facet of Heatlrcliffs chatactet derived ftom social class. It is inportant to rctd lVuthningHeigbts as mote rhein z gteat love story;it is an implicit critique of the discrimination visited upon Heathcliff by England's landed gentty.

Atea 3: Selecting Quotations

When selecting quotations to incorporate in your paper, the tationale for incorpotating the quotation needs to be beyond satisfdng an imaginaty need for plot summary. The quote cannot simply state what happened in the plot, but ratler youi rnotivation should be to analyze the quote itself for tone, imagety, chz;ttctetiza!.on, etc. Creatwe's Example: The teader is fust inuoduced to Wuthering Heights through Lockwood aftet he visits Heatlcliff for tle fust time: "I have just retumed ftom a visit to my landlord - the solitary neighbout that I shall be troubled with. O. Lockwood descdbes Wuthering Heights as both he and tle readet see it for the first time: "Before passing the thteshold, I paused to admire a quantity ofgtotesque carving lavished over the ftont..." (2). Lockwood goes on to describe the look of the house before he enters into t}re family sitting-toom. Luckily, Victot came around to actually help his cteature descdbe the setting of the house.

Victot's Example: Lockwood descdbes the distwbing imzges of \Tuthering Heights as both he and the readet expetience it fot the fust time: "I paused to admire a quantity of grotesque carving lavished ovet tle fton! and especially about the principal door; above which, among a wilderness of cunbling gtiffins and shameless litde boys..." (2). Not only does Bronte highlight the supematual creatures and "grotesque carvings" to add to the Gothic, menacing mood, she also tepresents tle savagety of the building by descdbing the depiction of animals and humans as part ofa "wildemess." Conftasted to the foreboding cawings surounding the doot, Bronte's brief mention of the "crumbling gdffins" subtly dismantles the powet of the house by suggesting the days of its former gloty have faded, decayed by time and possibly another outdide fotce yet to be mentioned.

Victot's Comment
My example bests ttre Monster's in its analysis of putpose, indicating the carr.ings' impact on mood. lTithin the fust two pages of her novel, Bronte has already telegraphed the fact that het novel will examine the internal tage felt by the ptotagonisg whne critiquing the desftuctive effects psychological trauma can have people's lives.