29672 Bytes Greetings from "German Milk Marketing Board" Hamburg

/* ---------- "The Complete Guide to Cows -- Novem" ---------- */

--==>> THE COMPLETE GUIDE TO COWS <<==-as you've NEVER seen them before!
________________________
(__) /
\
* OFFICIAL EDITION *
(oo) ( November 1989 Version! )
/-------\/ --'\________________________/
* WORLDWIDE DISTRIBUTION *
/ | ||
* ||----||
Edited by Eric W. Tilenius
Please send your submissions to:
Cow
ewtileni@pucc.Princeton.EDU // ewtileni@pucc.BITNET
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - (__)
(__)
(__)
(__)
(oo)
(oo)
(oo)
(oo)
/-------\/
/-------\/
/-------\/
/-------\/
/ | ||
/ | ||
/ | ||
/ | ||
* ||----||
* ||W---||
* ||w---||
* ||V---||
Cow

Cow laden
Same cow
Nancy Reagan-type
with milk after milking cow with milk

(___)
(___) *
(___)
(___)
(o o)
(o o) \
(o o)
(o o)
/-------\ /
/-------\ /
\-------\ /
/-------\ /
/ | ||O
/ | ||O
| ||O
/ | #>-+|O
* ||,---||
* ||@\--||
||,---||
* ||,----|
Bull

Same bull after Rotc bull after Red-blooded American Bull

seeing above cow seeing other bull shooting the Rotc bull

(__)
(__)
(__)
(__)
(oo)
(oo)
(oo)
(oo)
/-------\/-* /-------\/
/-------\/
/ | || \ )*)(\/* / * / | ||
* ||----|| * \ |||/)|/()(
\/|(/)(/\/(,,/ \)|(/\/|)(/\
Cow munching Grass munching Cow in water
on grass
on cow
(__)
(__) *
(__) *
(__)
(oo)
(oo) \
(oo) |
(oo)
/--------\/
/-oooooo-\/
\-------\/ \-------\/
* o| ||
* ooooooooo o o| || / ||
||----|| ooooooooooooo
||----||>==/-----||
ooo
ooooooooooooooooo

cows.txt[7/20/2013 6:14:30 AM]

Cow in trouble

Cow taking
a shit

Cow in deep
Cow getting the shit
shit
kicked out of her

(__)
(oo)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||

U
/---V
* |--|

Cow at 1 meter.

(__)
(oo)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||

Cow at 100 meters.

)__(
(oo)
*-------\/
/ | ||
/ ||----||
vv vv

American Cow

(__)
(oo)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||

Cow at 10,000 meters.

vv vv
||----|| *
|| | /
/\-------/
(oo)
()

Polish Cow

Australian Cow

(__)
(__)
____ (oo)
_---_(oo)
/- --\/
/- -\/
/ | ||
/|
||
* ||___-||
* ||___-||

Freshman Cow at
Freshman Cow
start of school After the "Freshman 15"
(__)
(OO)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||

Freshman Cow
After the "Freshman 20"

(__)
(__)
(@@)
(xx)
/-------\/
/-------\/
/ | ||
/ | ||
* ||----||
* ||----||

Cow who drank Jolt

Cow who ate
psychadelic mushrooms
/\
/ \
(__)
(__) \ /
SooS
(oo) \/
/------S\/S
/-------\/ /S
/ | ||
/ | || / S
/|
cows.txt[7/20/2013 6:14:30 AM]

Cow who used Jolt to wash

down psychadelic mushrooms

__
||
(_||_)
(oo)
/-------\/
||

* ||----||

* ||----||___/

* ||----||

This cow belonged Ben Franklin owned

to George Washington
this cow

Abe Lincoln's
cow

(__)
(oo)
/------\/
/| |/ |
/ | [) ||
* ||----||

*
(__)
\
(oo)
\-------\/
| ==$ ||
||----||

Old "One Arm" belonged

This cow was given to
to Ceasar's Palace
Hugh Hefner for his Birthday
(___)
(O)
/-------\ /
/ | ||V
* ||----||

(__)
(__)
(oo)
(oo)
\/--------\/
|
|
||------||

The cyclops that Jason and

This cow lived with
the Argonauts met had this cow
Dr. Doolittle
(__)
[##]
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||

(__)
(@o)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||

/|

/------- (__)
|| (oo)
* ||----|---\/

This cow belonged

This cow lived with
This cow belonged to
to Flash Gordon
the Little Rascals
the Headless Horseman
(____)
(____)
(____)
(oo )
(o o)
( O O)
/-----------\ /
/-----\ /---/-----------\ /
/ ||
| \/
/ | | \/ |
/ ||
| \/
/ ||
||||
\| |
|||
/ ||
||||
* ||||-----||||
*| | |-----| | |
* ||||-----||||
/\/\ /\/\
/\ /\ /\ /\
This cow belonged
This was Salvatore
No one was sure whether
to Pablo Picasso
Dali's favorite cow M.C. Escher's cow had four
legs or eight
O__O
(oo)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||
cows.txt[7/20/2013 6:14:30 AM]

\_|_/
(oo)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||

Cow at Disneyland

(__)
(oo)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||
============
/
/

Cow visiting the Statue of Liberty

(__)
(--)
/-\/-\
/| |\
| |
| |
/----\
\\

*
Cow Hanging Ten at Malibu
Cow sunning at Fort Lauderdale
(What a bod, huh guys?)
)\
/ \

(__)
(oo)

Cow swimming at Amityville

(Where Jaws was filmed, for those less educated)
*
\
\
|\
\ | \ (__)
\\|| \(oo)
\||\ \\/
\||
\\ ||
\\||
\||

(__)
(DD)
/-------\/
/ | ||_\_/
* ||----|
Cow chugging brews and staring at
sunbathers at Fort Lauderdale

///////////
\\_
////////////
\_
/ / / / / _______ / /
Cow skiing a Black Diamond at Aspen
/// / | \ //
/ / / (__)|
//
/ / / (oo)|
//
( @@@ )
/-------\/ |
( @@ )
(------------)
/ | ||_|
@@ (__)
( *>COUGH<* )
* ||----|
@@ (oo) . . . ( *>COUGH<* )
/--UU--\/
(____________)
/ | ||
Cow sheltering from English Weather
* ||---||
(New) Jersey Cow
OO
cows.txt[7/20/2013 6:14:30 AM]

OO

\\
\\
(__)
(DD)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||

//
(__) /
\\
(xx)/
\ +--------+\//
\|
|/
+--------+

Cow fantasizing about "Riding the Mechanical Bull"

at Gillies in Texas
o o
|__|
(__)
(__)
(oo)
(oo)
=(oo)=
/-------\/
/-------vv
/-------\/
/ | ||
/ | ||
/ | ||
* ||----||
* ||----||
* ||----||

oo

bill bixby
bela lugosi
boris karloff claude rains
male relative cow
cow
cow
cow
x
xxxx|xxxx
xxxxxxx|xxxxxxx
|
//
(__) //
(__) (__)
(oo)//
(oo)===(oo)
/-------\//
/-------\/ \/-------\
/ | |//
/ | ||
|| | \
* ||----|
* ||----||
||----|| *
Julie Andrews Cow
o
\
\

Siamese cows

(__)
/
(oo) /
/
_____\/___/
(__)
\__/
/ /\ / /
(oo)
_______(oo)
/ */
/---------\/
/| ___ \/
/ ___/
/ | x=a(b)||
/ | { }||
*----/\
* ||------||
* ||{___}||
/ \
||-----||
/ /
Mathematical
Cow
(developer of
cow-culus)

Television
This cow does Disco
Cow
(That's what comes of
(Cow-thode
snorting cow-caine)
Ray Tube)

o
| [---]
cows.txt[7/20/2013 6:14:30 AM]

| |
| |
|------========|
/----|---|\
| **** |=======|
/___/___\___\
o | **** |=======|
|
|
___| |==============|
|
|
___ {(__)} |==============|
\-----------/
[]( )={(oo)} |==============|
\ \ / /
/---===--{ \/ } |
----------------/ | NASA |==== |
|
|
* ||------||--------------------||
|
|
/ / \ \
|
/ ---- \
This cow jumped over the Moon
(__)
([][])
"I have this recurring dream
__\/_--U
about golden arches.".. (__)
/\ \__
:..("")
/\\\ / /
//\ ____\_____\/ //
/----/__/\ /\
// \\/ \___ / //
\\\____/--\-// /-/__________/ //
/====== \/
=======/==============//
*_/ / \ /
// /
\\
/
\
//
\\
Psycowlogist and patient
(___)
\\ (__)
(o o)
\\\ (oo)
\/
*-----\_______\/\/
\--O--/
_______/ --- \______
// -----\
--------\ \S/ /\_____
\\/_{} /==V===[]
\______/
\_____\\//
\__/
It's a bird...
//\\
The Boss
It's a plane...
// \\ (Bruce Holstien)
// //

==================
_____________________________
H
H
|
|-------------|
H (__)
H
|
| ________ |
H (oo)
H
__
| COWNTY | | (|__|) | |
H / \/ \
H / \
| JAIL | | |oo| | |
H | | | | H | STOP |
|
| |__|\/|__| |
H D===b=----- H \ __ /
|
|o
|
HH
||
|
|
|
H
H
||
|
|]
|
H
H
||
cows.txt[7/20/2013 6:14:30 AM]

|
|
|
H
|_____________|_____________|
Some cows get in trouble...
( ( )
(( ) )
((
)
(
/)
( ( \\
)
( | // )
| | (__)
| | (oo)
| | ----\/
| | ||
**| | ---||
``'--------Cow Hide

||
H

Cattle Guard

(__)
______(oo)_____
( _)_______(__) )
\ __________/
Cow Pie

\ | /
___________
____________ \ \_# /
| ___
|
_________
|
| \ #/
|| | |
|====|
| | | | | \\#
| |`v'| |
|
|
|
| \# //
| --- ___ |
| | || | |
| | | | | #_//
| | ||
|
|
|
| \\ #_/_______ | | | |
| | || | |
| | | | | \\# /_____/ \ |
--- |
|
|
|
| \# |+ ++| | | || |
| | || | |
|
| \# |+ ++| | | || |
| | || | |
| () |#| H |_ || | |||| | ||
|
| ( ||| ) | # | | |||| | |
| ||||||| |
________/ /_____ | | |||| | |
| ||||||| |
`v'| ||||||| |
|| |`.
(__) (__)
()
(oo) (oo)
/---V
/-------\/
\/ --------\
*| |
/ | ||
||_______| \
* ||W---||
||
|| *
"Cow Town"
\ (__)
\\(oo)
/-----\\\/
/ | (##)
* ||----||"

(__)
(\/)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||

This cow plays bagpipes.

cows.txt[7/20/2013 6:14:30 AM]

Cow from Beijing

||

(__)
(\/)
/-------\/
/ | 666 ||
* ||----||

(__)
($$)
/-------\/
/ |=====||
* ||----||

Satanic cow

(__)
(**)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||

This cow is a Yuppie

(__)
(oo)
/-'''''-\/
/ |'''''||
* ||''''||

Cow in love

(__)
(oo)
/-------------------\/
/|
||
* ||----------------||

Cow in Argyle
Stretch Cow
*
** **
* ** * * * **
* / / \* *
\ \/ \
//
(__)
* / / \ \ (__) \ \
/--------(00)
/
(00) / /
/|
|( )
\ /-------\/ \ \
* ||---- ||()
/ / | || / /
|| ||
\ \ * ||----|| \ \
/ /
//
Cow Chewing Marbles
Cow in Heat
(___)
(o o)
/------\ / (__)
/ ____O (oo)
| / /----\----\/
/\oo===| / ||
| || *||-----||
*
Cowt in the Act

(__)
(oo)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* OO----OO
low rider cow

(__)
\__\
(__)
(oo)
o (oo)
(oo)
/-------\/
____\___\/
*+-------\/
/ | ||
/ | ||
||______||
* ||----||
* ||----||
||----||
OO OO
OO OO
OO OO
Detroit cow
Mustang cow
pickup cow
(__)
(oo)
/---------------\/
cows.txt[7/20/2013 6:14:30 AM]

(__)
(oo)
/----\/

\_||_
(*||*)
/-------\||/

/|
||
/ ||
/ | ||
* ||------------||
*-||----||
* ||----||
OO
OO
OO OO
OO }{
li-moo-cow
fastback cow
teenager's cow
____
(____)
.xxxx.
'(oo)`
/-----'-\/ `
/ | |============>
* ||----| ()

(__)
(oo)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||
holy cow

Moo-ammar Cowdafi
armed and dangerous

(___)
(___)
(o o)
(o o)
/-------\ /
/-------\ /
/ | ||O
/ | O ||O
* ||,---||
* ||,---||
A Bull

A-bomb-in-a-bull

(---)
( )
/-----\
| |
| | |
| | |
| * |
Coward

No-bull

(___)
(o o)
(-----) \ /
/ /\ O
* |O|
----Phone Bull

__________________________
}__{ / Send YOUR cow pictures to \
(00) ( ewtileni@pucc.Princeton.EDU )
:****** \/ ==='\___________________________/'
: # ##
##****##
"" ""
|
|
|
|
|
|
|

|
| |
|
(__)
| |
|
(oo)
| |
| /-------\/
| |
| / | ||
| |
| * ||----||
| |
\_____________
|

cows.txt[7/20/2013 6:14:30 AM]

*
\
(__)
\
(oo)
-----------\/-----|
|---------\_________________

|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
/

_________________
/
| /
|
| |
|
| |
|
| |
|
| |
|
| |
|
| |
|
| |
\
/
\

Cow perched on a tree.

|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
/

_________________

Cow attempting to fly off tree.

|
|
|
|
|
\_________________
_________________
/
|
|
|
|
|
|
(__)
|
*---------(..)
\
----\/

Cow that has failed miserably in the attempt.

.

/\
.
.
:
(__)
. / \
.
.
:
(xx)
/ \ .
. *
:
__------\/
/
\
*
:
* ||____||
| (__) | . . **
:
/ | |\
. /| (oo) |\
**
:
/ | /\/\ | \ . . *
:
Hamburger
. / |=|==|=| \ . *
:
./ || || \ .
:
/ USA | || |NASA \ .
:
*
(__)
|______| |______|
.
:
\
(oo)
.
(__||__) . .
:
\-------\/
. /_\ /_\ . . .
:
8-| ||
!!! !!!
:
||----||
:
The cow that jumped over the moon.
:
Flying Cow
...---...
../ / | \ \..
cows.txt[7/20/2013 6:14:30 AM]

./ / / | \ \ \.
/ / / | \ \ \
/ / / | \ \ \
\
|
/
\
|
/
\
|
/
\
|
/
\
|
/
\ | /
\ | /
\ | /
\ | /
\ | /(__)
\|/ (oo)
/---++--\/
/ | || ||
* ||-++-||
Cow surviving attack by Red Baron
..---..
(__)
/
\
(oo)
| RIP |
/-------\/
|
|
/ | ||
|
|
* ||----||
|
|
|
|
\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\/////////////////
Elvis's Cow...

...Or is it alive and living in tax exile???

(__)
(oo)
/---+
+--\/
/| |
| ||
* ||-+
+-||
*
David Copperfield's Cow

(__)
(oo)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||
(__) (__)
(oo) (oo)
cows.txt[7/20/2013 6:14:30 AM]

David Copperfield's other Cow

/-------\/ \/-------\
/ | || -- || | \
* ||---- -|| *
(__)
(oo)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||

(__)
(oo)
\/-------\
|| | \
||----|| *

Barnum's Troupe of performing cows

(__)
(oo)
/-------\/
/ | 007 ||
* ||----||
Cow licenced to kill

_--------_
|__________| BIG
XXXXXXXXXX MAC
__________
|_
_|
-------Enemy Cow after having met previous cow
(__)
(oo)
/'-m
/ '' ` )
|
/|
| | ||

(__)
(oo) o /| /|/|_
/ \/ / /
_/
/ _\=== ___\_____/___
|_____|_|
___|__/ |/\ (___________(_)
//|| ||
*
* ww ww
Mrs. O'Leary's Cow

Cow'nt Dracula

____
____
|+++++|
|++++| ___ |++++|
____ |+++++|
|++++| |++ ______________________
|++++| |+++++|
|++++| |++/
/( )\
\
|++++| |+++++| __
| | |+|
|-oo- |
\______ |++++| |+++++| |++|
-----(__)--|
\__\/
_(__)_ \ ---------------------------------o ( oo /_______________________| (oo) \ |
__
| _/\_| | M O O - B U S T E R S|__\/\ /| |
/oo| - Bleaurgh!
|-| \\____
------ )_ /| /\
-|_ \_|-_| 0 _| * \/ *
\ | __________________________________/
| W| \ \_/ /----------------- \ \_/ /
/ /\ \ \___/
\___/
// \\
Who you gonna call...?
(__)

(__)

cows.txt[7/20/2013 6:14:30 AM]

(__)

(----------)

(00)
/------\/
/| ||
* ||----||

(-o)
/------\/
/| ||
* ||----||

Cow w/ Glasses

(--) . . . ( *>YAWN<* )
/------\/
(----------)
/| ||
* ||----||

Flirtatious cow (winking) Cow after pulling an all-nighter

*
(__)
(__)
(__)
(__)
\
(oo)
(oo)
(oo)
(oo)
\-------\/
/-------\/
/-------\/
/-------\/
/|
|\
//
\
/\
/
/\
\
//||----||\\ * //------\\
* \\--//
* \\----\\
Cow walking

Cow jogging

Same cow

Cow breaking

(__)
(oo)
(__) o
* (__)
\/
(oo)/ "
| (oo)
____| \____
/-------\/(__ o=o=o=|------\/
---/ --**
/|
/
|
|
*____/ |___//
* ||----||
||----||
//--------/
//__
Cow
Cow pooing
Cow marching
standing
Side
Front Side back
(___) Where's all the bulls!
(__)
(__) (__) (__)
(O O)/
( oo
(oo) oo ) ( )
_/\ /\_
/\_|
/\/\ |_/\ / \
\\/ O \//
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------(___)
( OO
\_ | - Got some cows that aren't in here? Add yours to the official
\O collection! Send them to: ewtileni@pucc.Princeton.EDU
(___)
( -\_ | - G'nite, and thank you for your support. Zzz z z z z z z z
\O
Thanks to EVERYONE who contributed COWS!
PLEASE DISTRIBUTE THIS FILE WIDELY -- IT IS *NOT* COPYRIGHTED.
(Besides, this is a classic that NO ONE should miss!)

cows.txt[7/20/2013 6:14:30 AM]