Running head: CULTURAL BIO PART: B

Cultural Biography: Part B Leonard T. Thomas II Georgia State University Professor Maria Azuri (SW 3000)

CULTURAL BIO: PART B

The late 1980s saw the ascension of Whitney Houston and the advent of MTV, but on March 30, 1989 I was brought into the world at St. Josephs Hospital in Detroit, Michigan. At this time the city of Detroit was a bustling metropolis with roaring automotive plants and tons of potential. It was also a city however, rife with violence and crime. My mother was a street smart and college educated woman from the mean streets of Chicago and my father was Detroit native. Together, they decided that Detroit would not be the best place to raise a new family and decided to move out west to Las Vegas. My mom had graduated with a BS in biology from Wayne State University a few years prior to my birth and my dad never finished college. He did however, have a lucrative truck driving career and so they made ends meet. Of the six children born to my grandmother, my mother was the first person in her family and one of only two overall to go to college and complete it successfully. To this day, the length of my parents marriage and overall financial benefits theyve enjoyed are the envy of a large majority of my family members. My father on the other hand had been an adopted child and never knew his biological parents. At this time in their lives, it was mothers dream to go on to dental school and become a dentist. After my birth however, this dream began to take a backseat and disappeared completely after a few years. Las Vegas was a great city for them to gain stability, however the nightlife and vibe of this entertainment town was not conducive to raising children as there were no real things for children to do. This prompted my parents in beginning to search for a place, somewhere that could provide the structure that a fledgling family needed and the safety that hadnt been found thus far. Their research brought them to the suburbs of Metro Atlanta. In the early 1990s, the areas outside of the I-285 Perimeter were undeveloped and had dirt roads. This is where my parents decided to settle. DeKalb County is as it was then, the Georgia county with the highest number of African Americans. Considering my fathers pro-black stance in all matters, this settling pattern makes sense. As I began my elementary school years, all I saw were other kids like me. If there were any white or foreign students, their numbers were extremely small. Therefore, I always felt a sense of inclusion in race matters. As time went however, I began to notice changes that would challenge this sense of belonging. In second grade, as I remember it Lil Bow Wow was absolutely huge. Like my female peers, I saw him as being attractive. For some reason this caused me to speak about it and write his name in my notebooks. From then on, I was labeled the go-to gay boy and the teasing began. Interestingly enough, the criticisms never came from other second grade students, but the sixth-graders whom I wanted to be so bad. From my vantage point, they seemed like adults and the boys seemed like men. I made advances towards them, but it was always met with laughter and not violence. I never acted out in front of teachers, therefore my progress reports were always positive and my preference was never listed on it as a behavioral issue. My parents, like all parents knew that their son wasnt like other boys my age. My father tried to get me to like sports, but I rejected it. In fact, I never liked to do much of anything in my younger years except play video games. In many ways, the games were a way for me out of the frustration of not being able to be my full self and I played them religiously. It wasnt until middle school that my parents decided to stage an all-out assault on my sexuality in attempting to change the path I was on. While we had always gone to church, I noticed an upswing in the

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insistence that I go. There was no choice actually, and over time I started to resent going. To this day, I have not been in a church building for years. I cant even count the last time that I went. My mother never directly asked me my sexuality until years later, but once it was found out that I was hoarding posters of male celebrities under my bed, I was spanked and taken to a psychologist in the hopes that I could be rid of the intimate feelings that I had towards other males. I never felt that there was anything inherently wrong with me, but my parents did. Slowly, anger and resentment began to manifest inside of me. In the interim, in 1995 my younger sister was born. My parents believed that a sibling would help me mature and not be so lonely. Indeed, loved being a big brother. I developed a bond with my sibling that continues to this day. I felt responsible for her, and for many years our paths were similar. It was not until I began high school that the issues with my sexuality reached a fever pitch. From my perspective, they began to place a preference towards my sister and as my jealousy grew, so did my rebellious nature. By the time I was in the 11th grade, we had moved back to Detroit and I had run away from home a total of five times. Each time, it seemed an argument with my father would precipitate the behavior. I ran away to escape his judgments and preferred the streets more than being at home. Whenever I found myself wandering, I found myself at the Ruth Ellis Center. This was a LGBT day center where kids like me could come for refuge. There were daily activities, food, and a shared commonality with others that my father would never understand. The only problem with the center as we called it, was that once its doors closed for the day everyone had to find somewhere else to go. For most of the other kids, this was just an after school retreat. But for me, I literally stayed from opening to the time it closed. Nightfall in Detroit was anything but comforting. I once slept in an abandoned house with a guy I met off the street. I had to pay the price for this refuge by letting him sleep with me so that I wouldnt be kicked out. Other times, I would solicit myself along with transsexual prostitutes in order to hopefully be picked up by someone and taken to their warm house doing whatever they wanted. During this time in my life, I desperately wanted companionship. Of course the men picking me up saw me coming from a mile away and would tell me whatever I needed to hear in order to get me in the car. For the longest time, I believed that they were going to let me stay with them only to be mortified when they kicked me out a couple of days later. Because I ran away so many times during my eleventh grade year, I failed both semesters. My parents were growing fatigued with my behavior and came up with a solution. I would either shape my act or go to boarding school. The thought of boarding school was the only thing that truly scared me. Needless to say, I cooperated. I went to an alternative school for 12th grade and made up the entire 11th and 12th grade in one year and graduated on time (with a full scholarship) to Bowling Green State University. My life began to improve immensely and in Fall 2007 I found myself at BGSU in Ohio. If anything, nothing in my entire life couldve prepared me for the culture shock. I was a kid who had only ever gone to school with other black children. Here I was in the middle of rural Ohio with nothing but white students as far as the eye could see. It seemed like everyone was white, and subsequently I had no true idea how to relate. I was very smart, however I still felt inferior in the midst of such a large school with no one else who was like me.

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By October 2007, I had withdrawn completely from school, rescinded the scholarship and signed up with the United States Army. At this point, my parents completely disowned me and did not support my decision. I however, enjoyed the experience. I was finally on my own, making decent money, and not having to answer to my parents criticisms. Of course, my enlistment was before the repeal of DADT (Dont Ask, Dont Tell). My superior officers prodded and attempted to provoke me by using anti-gay slurs and epithets in front of the entire company. I found strength however, and never succumbed to their abuses. I did write a lengthy letter to the General at Fort Leonard Woods base. His visit to our company resulted in for drill sergeants being demoted, but it also culminated in me being discharged for the admission of my sexuality. While this was indeed a setback, I didnt let it stop me in my striving for success in my own life. After returning to Detroit following my exit from the military I became heavily depressed. I felt that I had let down my family in so many ways and a feeling of immense guilt came over me. My parents were allowing me stay at home, but without contributing to the household I once again ran away. This time I found refuge in an organization that would become the motivating factor in me becoming a social worker. I found Covenant House. This organization is a world-wide network of shelters and transitional living programs that assist youth from the ages of 18-24 achieve independence and stability. In this program, I gained my first job and met my long time best friend, Bianca. Together, we knew that there was so much outside of Detroit that we decided to stage a move to a state on the other side of the nation, California. Once there we found ourselves at Covenant House California where we thrived. We both got jobs and the trouble didnt start until I met a guy who I eventually fell in love with. Against Biancas wishes I moved out of the Covenant House environment and into his home. Over time he became more violent and demanding. At times he would bring men home that I had to have sex with and if I refused, I was beaten. More embarrassed than scared, I stayed until I was able to get away from him. I got enough money together to buy a plane ticket to New York. I wanted to be able to go somewhere that he couldnt find me. Tearfully, I left Bianca in California and started another adventure across the country. This time my travels led me to Covenant House New York. I tried to gain employment, but because it was the end of the year no one was hiring. I tried for approximately two months before the program coordinators gave me the ultimatum of finding a job or leaving the program. With no other options, I made the scariest call of my life. I called my parents. It took everything in me to ask their permission to come back home after almost 2.5 years of being away. Thankfully, that call was the start of a turning point in my life. Since then, I have gotten my Associates degree in Social Work and am obviously working towards my Bachelors in the field. The stability I enjoy now is part of the new initiative I have for myself to improve my own life outcomes. I didnt want to be statistic. Unfortunately, about a year ago I discovered that I was HIV+. No doubt my activities over the life course in engaging in survival sex led to this outcome. Thankfully, Im in treatment and my prognosis is better than I could have ever imagined. Im living unafraid and I am fully confident in what the future holds for me.