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Emotional Foreplay
Emotional Foreplay
Music and movies are excellent sources for cultivating sexual readiness by
stirring romantic thoughts and emotions. Sometimes a song on the radio or
seeing a romantic movie can cause a flicker of arousing thoughts that if
welcomed, encouraged, and directed at our spouse can provide fuel for intimate
desire.
FROLICKING FOREPLAY
First let’s divide frolicking foreplay into two parts, emotional and physical. Emotional
foreplay is making our partner feel special and valued in and out of the bedroom. Without
emotional foreplay no amount of physical foreplay will create the hot sizzling sex and the
deep emotional intimacy we constantly crave.
It has been written that women need ten times more foreplay than men, so I am just
repeating what I have read. So now you can see why just “bringing home the bacon” or
just “being around” won’t be enough to light her fire. And foreplay must be a dance that
goes on continually throughout the relationship,
women are turned on by “emotional stimulation” the way men are aroused visually. Though more
and more romance authors are leaning toward more erotic romance,
In most cases, a woman’s libido is directly linked to emotions that revolve around romance and
love. These emotions are a connected set of processes that involve physiological changes, such
as heart rate, blood pressure and hormones circulating throughout the body—and these comprise
the cornerstones of a woman’s sexual drive. Therefore, when a woman’s emotions are stirred by
a romance novel, that’s a recipe for an emotional aphrodisiac. It’s like giving a woman emotional
foreplay.”
:"Asif is very liberal...in him she knew she found a man who was secured enough
in himself to allow a woman to be really powerful and not to feel threathened..."
In the mood: 10 ways to fuel her desire
1. Practice emotional foreplay. Sultry French icon Brigitte Bardot said that sex
begins early in the morning and ends when you go to sleep at night - meaning that
the way you treat your lady throughout the day determines just how hot she'll be
when you're ready to get horizontal. Make thoughtful ongoing efforts that say I
care about you.
2. Control yourself. Show her that affection needn't always lead to sex. Women often
resent the feeling that when a man gets close, it's meant as a prelude to rattling the
bedposts. But when a woman feels that you crave her body as more than a sex toy,
her uninhibited desire for you is free to emerge. So give her a massage and just
hold her.
3. Pursue, pursue, pursue. For most women I know, a fine line exists between being
pressured and being pursued - and we love to be pursued.
A woman who isn't otherwise in the mood can be infected by the magnetism of your
desire if you persist in a stylish, seductive manner.
Don't spout, sulk or withdraw affection. If you handle her refusal graciously, you'll
score points that will lead to an enthusiastic "yes!" sooner rather than later.
4. Cross erogenous borders. A woman's excitement rises when a man makes love to
all of her. You've probably heard that before, but try looking at it this way: A
woman's body, from her arching brows to her carefully painted toes, is as hungry
for stimulation as your penis. Imagine how you'd react if a woman thought she
could satisfy you by rubbing a one-centimeter circle somewhere on the head of
your favorite organ. Would that make you happy? Now think about making love
with your partner. Do you think that simply stroking her clitoris - rich with nerve
endings, but still one minuscule spot - is really going to make her want to repeat
the whole process tomorrow? While women love orgasms, and stimulating the
clitoris is a great way to induce them, what a woman will remember best is the
fact that you aroused her to the melting point before you got your hands on the
thermostat.
Giving pleasure and knowing that it is being enjoyed is her own emotional foreplay I
Sex is about you, making love is about both of you. When you just have sex, your partner
becomes the means to an end — this is enough to make any woman feel lousy!
Emotional intimacy is like a 7/24 foreplay. When we feel really close to each other, the
mental foreplay never stops. Your mind is intimately connected all the time. Many
couples have lost that connection and often end up living like roommates.
ways of intimacy
One the greatest desires of both men and women is to be truly understood, that
is, for our mate and friends to really know how we feel and why. One of the
greatest dimensions of love is the intimate exchange of being understood.
Men are mostly stimulated by what they see, women are mostly stimulated by
what they hear. Men say what they see (facts, commands, criticism), women say
what they feel (intangibles, indirect responses, personal attributes). These type
of things will provoke an undesirable response and will often drive their mate
away.
Men are factual and critical-black and white, Women are feeling and sensual--
abstract:
· Say what you feel, not what to do. Say how it feels, not the facts.
Negative examples:
1. Down deep inside that makes me feel like crying when you bring that up not:
When are you going to let go of that grudge.
2. Do you know how much it hurts when you are with someone else even if you
don't supposedly care about them, not: Stop doing that shit with those guys.
3. Do you know how much I trust you, not: I can't believe you did that again.
Positive examples:
1. I really love it when you cook for me, not just: you are a great cook.
2. You make life so much more beautiful, you notice and cherish what everyone
else takes for granted, not: ignoring her comment or saying “don't be so silly, or
enough already, or you get so excited over nothing”.
3. “That turns me on” not: “do that some more” or “keep going” or silence/no
comment.
· Women and even people in general will not condemn or argue about how you
feel about something, but you do invite strife with commands and statements of
fact. We men have to look to why we want to issue a command or make a
statement. There is always a feeling causing the command or factual statement
that will bring intimacy and deeper connection/respect with our mate if we learn
to express them.
· Old proverb: A soft answer turns away wrath, but grievous words stir up strife
and anger.
Understanding Submission
Women are designed for complete submission; men are supposed to be designed
to bring women into submission. However, most men don't have a clue about true
submission. It is the most intimate facet of a relationship. It is the ultimate
expression of love.
Simply put, submission is one the greatest deep down desires of women. Without
this fulfillment they are frustrated and feeling some degree of emptiness in their
relationship, and will be venerable to the words and power of a stranger.
Complete fulfillment of a woman's heart only comes by her willing and complete
submission to the right man. Women are designed emotionally to submit. But just
because most women desire to submit or surrender all to their mate does not
mean they will do so easily. Their intense desire to submit/surrender all will only
be bestowed as a precious gift to a trustworthy man that knows how to
graciously but powerfully bring her into submission.
Women who are not in complete submission with their mate are venerable and
could easily find themselves in an affair. Some women who have been hurt will
have a hard, bitter, and/or a cold façade that may never be penetrated to allow
the flow of true love and submission.
Unfortunately, most men have the wrong idea about submission. Submission is
neither slavery nor servitude. Submission is a gift, a free act of surrender
motivated by love and supported by trust. Submission only comes by a willing
heart and cannot be forced nor demanded. Submission is not obedience to the
commands and desires of non-giving type man. Submission is more like the
surrendering and giving of one's soul to her mate that is passionate, caring, and
giving yet powerful and in complete control. Submission is not physical, but it
does have its ultimate expression in the act of lovemaking. Submission is earned
not taken, intimate not degrading, is love and not absolute control.
ROMANCE: Women love romance, observe and learn about romance. Much of
romance is simply treating a woman right down to the last detail. It is like
emotional foreplay and should not be taken lightly. Romance is like all out adoring
your woman with a bit of mystery and control. It is also like treating a woman
with class and loving expression yet with power and strength. Romance also
involves a bit of a chase which women absolutely love. Men have some natural
ability to romance the woman they fall for when they first fall, but many can
stumble into a trap after the relationship has peaked or matured to thinking
romance is fake or a put on. True, some men are naturally more romantic than
others, but all have some of it when they first fall for a woman and do strange
things to win her. Here is a truth that we men must embrace to keep our woman
happy: WE MUST ALMOST ROMANCE HER JUST AS MUCH TO KEEP HER AS WE
DID TO WIN HER IN THE FIRST PLACE, and if it was not fake then, then it is not
fake now if you want to keep the one you love.
TRUTH: Lying at any time or circumstance undermines every truth that one
speaks. It is better never to lie, because your words become more powerful and
easy to be embraced. It is hard for oneself to believe his own words if he lies
often, yet alone to be believed by another person. Truth is always better, even if
kept silent. Truth is the only way one can achieve the highest level of intimacy
and exchange with his mate.
SEX: Men need to find out all they can about sex and not assume that they
learned the right way. There are many books and even videos about the mental
and physical aspects of sex. The key to success here is one's attitude: BE
CONFIDENT WITH WHAT YOU HAVE AND KNOW, BUT ALWAYS STRIVE TO PLEASE
AND LEARN MORE IN EVERY WAY YOU CAN!