6 Ways to Sunday, How to Cope with Relationship BreakUps...

Tips and Advice, That et !ou See the i"ht at #nd the o$ the Tunnel...

%y Terry Clark

Table of Content

1. Adopting a Positive Point of View

2. Are You Desperate to Get Your Ex $. oosting Your %elf Confiden!e

a!"#

&. Coping wit' a

rea"()p if Your Ex *as C'eated

+. Dealing wit' Pra!ti!al ,atters -. Dealing wit' t'e )rge to Conta!t Your Ex .. /ive Co00on Traps to Avoid 1. /ive %teps to Coping wit' a rea"()p

2. /our 3easons for 4ot 5oving Your Ex 16. /our T'ings to 7eep in ,ind 11. Getting an 8nternal ,a"eover 12. Getting t'e %upport You 4eed 1$. *elpful Dating Advi!e 1&. *ow ,u!' Ti0e Do You 4eed# 1+. *ow to Avoid *ealt' Dangers after a 1-. *ow to e!o0e 8ndependent Again rea" )p

1.. *ow to Co(Parent wit' 9our Ex 11. *ow to Cope if Your Ex ro"e it :ff

12. *ow to Cope w'en Your Ex /inds a 4ew Partner 26. *ow to Cope wit' Depression 21. *ow to Cope wit' E0ptiness 22. *ow to Get :ver Your Ex 2$. *ow to *elp Your C'ildren Cope 2&. *ow to 80prove /uture 3elations'ips

2+. *ow to ,a"e Cold Tur"e9 %eparation ;or" 2-. *ow to Treat Co00on /riends 2.. 80portant Dos and Don<ts 21. 8s 3unning Awa9 a %olution# 22. 5earn fro0 Your ,ista"es $6. ,a"e %ure You %ta9 *ealt'9 $1. ,a"ing Plans to ,ove /orward $2. ,ista"es to Avoid after rea"ing )p

$$. :pening )p to :t'er People $&. %'ould You Co00uni!ate wit' Your Ex# $+. %'ould You Consider Getting a!" wit' Your Ex#

$-. %'ould You %ta9 /riends wit' Your Ex# $.. %'ould You Ta"e Advi!e fro0 /riends# $1. %tarting Your 4ew 5ife as a %ingle $2. T'e E0otional %tages of a &6. T'e 3ebound 3elations'ip &1. T'e 3elations'ip &2. T'ree ;a9s to Get &$. Tips for Girls :nl9 &&. Top 3easons to be :pti0isti! about t'e /uture &+. )nderstanding Your E0otions After a 3elations'ip rea"()p &-. ;'at 8f Your Ex ;ants You a!"# rea"()p udd9 rea" )p

a!" to 4or0al

&.. ;'at to Do if You

ro"e it :ff

&1. ;'at to Do 8f Your Ex *arasses You &2. ;ill *ating Your Ex *elp#

3esour!es

Adopting a Positive Point of View

Ending a relations'ip is 'ig'l9 li"el9 to !ause a !risis in 9our life. 8t is natural for 9ou to feel sad= anxious and angr9 and to 'ave low expe!tations for t'e future. *owever= it is perfe!tl9 possible for 9ou to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up and !o0e out of t'is !risis as a better and 'appier person. You >ust need to follow t'e si0ple an!ient wisdo0 t'at ti0e 'eals all wounds.

You need to loo" on t'e brig't side of life and reali?e t'at 9ou !an and will re!over. )se t'e following tips to anal9?e ea!' see0ingl9 adverse !ir!u0stan!e in 9our life after t'e relations'ip brea"(up and to find out all t'e positive opportunities it presents to 9ou. @ust re0e0ber t'at 9ou 'ave to 'ave t'e willpower to turn ever9t'ing in 9our favor.

You do not 'ave a person next to 9ou to support 9ou and to love 9ou. T'is is !ertainl9 true= but 9ou s'ould definitel9 as" 9ourself w'et'er 9our ex partner was giving 9ou all t'is. T'e answer to t'is Auestion will 0ost !ertainl9 be BnoB. *en!e= t'ere is not'ing 9ou s'ould feel sorr9 about. Cuite t'e opposite= 9ou now 'ave t'e perfe!t opportunit9 to find a person w'o will trul9 appre!iate 9ou for w'o 9ou are and give 9ou all t'e love= !are and support t'at 9ou need.

You feel a total la!" of !onfiden!e in 9ourself. 8t is natural to feel t'at wa9 after a relations'ip brea"(up= but 9ou reall9 'ave to as" 9ourself w'9 t'is is 'appening and w'at valid reasons 9ou 'ave for t'is. 8f 9our partner was angr9 wit' 9ou= t'e9 0ig't 'ave said awful t'ings t'at 'ave 0ade 9ou feel bad about 9ourself.

*owever= t'is does not 0ean t'at t'e9 are true. 8n fa!t= 9our partner 0ost !ertainl9 does not t'in" t'at wa9. T'at is w'9 9ou 'ave to see 9ourself for w'o 9ou trul9 are in order to !ope wit' 9our relations'ip(brea" up. You 'ave a variet9 of great Aualities plus 9ou are free to express 9our wonderful personalit9.

You feel 'opeless about t'e future given t'at all 9our plans wit' 9our partner 'ave failed. @ust t'in" about it. 4ow 9ou are free to 0a"e all t'ese plans a realit9 wit' so0eone w'o will trul9 love 9ou and !'eris' 9our relations'ip. ,ore

i0portantl9= now 9ou !an do all t'e t'ings t'at 9ou 'ave alwa9s wanted to do= but 9our ex opposed.

4ow 9ou !an reall9 !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"( up be!ause 9ou !an see w'at wonderful opportunities 9ou 'ave in front of 9ou.

Are You Desperate to Get Your Ex

a!"#

,an9 people find it 'ard to a!!ept t'e fa!t t'at ever9t'ing is over. 8n turn= t'e9 do not a!!ept t'e relations'ip brea"(up as t'e end. 4aturall9= t'e9 experien!e a strong desire to get t'eir ex ba!". Are 9ou in t'is "ind of situation# T'e following tips !an reall9 'elp 9ou get out of it in t'e best wa9 possible wit'out getting 'urt.

As" 9ourself w'9 9ou want 9our ex ba!" so badl9. 8s it be!ause t'e9 are t'e rig't person for 9ou# 8s it be!ause 9ou love t'e0# 8s it be!ause 9ou are used to being in a relations'ip wit' t'is person and now 9ou find it un!o0fortable to !'ange 9our life# 8s it be!ause 9ou t'in" being single will affe!t 9our reputation or self(!onfiden!e badl9#

T'ere is no point in getting ba!" wit' 9our ex after a relations'ip brea"(up >ust for t'e sa"e of t'e !onvenien!e and for t'e sa"e of being wit' so0eone. 4aturall9= 9ou are in a state and 9ou

!annot t'in" !learl9. T'is 0a9 0a"e 9ou give dis'onest answers. T'at is w'9 t'e best t'ing to do is to fo!us on i0proving 9our life and 9our self( estee0 wit'out 9our ex around. Give 9ourself a brea"= if 9ou prefer to see it t'at wa9= and tr9 to be!o0e a 0ore !onfident and positive person.

:n!e 9ou 'ave relaxed and got rid of t'e negative torturing e0otions= 9ou !an sit down and anal9?e t'e !auses t'e led to t'e relations'ip brea"(up. 4ow t'at 9ou !an t'in" 0ore !learl9= 9ou !an probabl9 0odif9 9our answers to t'e set of Auestions given above. As" 9ourself w'9 9ou bro"e up wit' 9our ex. Did 9ou find t'e0 anno9ing and so0eti0es i0possible to deal wit'# Did 9our feelings for t'e0 be!o0e wea"er#

8f t'e answer to t'ese Auestions is B9esB= 9ou s'ould definitel9 forget about 9our ex and fo!us on 9our new life. 8n t'is wa9= 9ou will be able to find t'e rig't partner for 9ou eventuall9. 8f 9ou still find 9our feelings strong after 'aving started a life wit'out 9our ex= 9ou 0a9 !onsider re!on!iliation D but onl9 if t'e9 are willing.

@ust "eep in 0ind t'at re!on!iliation after a relations'ip brea"(up is a ver9 diffi!ult and long pro!ess. After all= bot' of 9ou 'ave been deepl9 'urt. Anot'er t'ing to !onsider is t'at 9our ex 0a9 not want to 'ave an9t'ing to do wit' 9ou. 8n t'is !ase= 9ou s'ould still tr9 to explain to t'e0 'ow 9ou feel= but wit'out pus'ing 9our ex to get ba!"

toget'er wit' 9ou. 8f 9ou reall9 !are for t'is person= 9ou would let t'e0 'ave t'eir own life and be 'app9.

oosting Your %elf Confiden!e

8rrespe!tive of t'e reasons for t'e split wit' 9our ex= 9ou are !ertainl9 feeling less !onfident t'an before. T'is is perfe!tl9 natural= but 9ou s'ould wor" to fix t'e proble0 straig't wa9. 8n t'is wa9 9ou will !ope wit' 9our relations'ip brea"(up better and 0ore Aui!"l9. ,ore i0portantl9= it will be easier for 9ou to i0prove 9our life and start a new 0ore pro0ising relations'ip.

%top bla0ing 9ourself for t'e split. 8f 9ou feel 9ou 'ave done so0et'ing wrong or believe 9ou la!" t'e Aualities to 0a"e a relations'ip wor"= 9ou will find it extre0el9 'ard to re!over fro0 t'e brea"( up. A!!ept t'e fa!t t'at bot' 9ou and 9our ex !ontributed to t'e split in so0e wa9. 5earn fro0 an9 0ista"es t'at 9ou 'ave 0ade and 0ove on. T'e fa!t t'at 9ou 'ave bro"en up si0pl9 0eans t'at 9ou and 9our ex are not for one anot'er. T'is does not 0ean t'at 9ou are a bad person or t'at 9ou don<t loo" good.

,a"e 9ourself feel good. ;'en 9ou feel good= 9ou naturall9 feel a lot 0ore !onfident. 8n t'is wa9= 9ou will !ope wit' t'e relations'ip brea"(up better

and get 9our life ba!" to nor0al. 8t is up to 9ou to de!ide w'at 9ou will do for 9ourself. You 0a9 want to go on a s'ort va!ation. You 0a9 want to do so0et'ing si0pler li"e getting a spa treat0ent or going out wit' a group of friends.

3e0ind 9ourself of all t'e great Aualities 9ou 'ave. 3egrettabl9= t'ere are a lot of a!!usations fro0 bot' sides during a relations'ip brea"(up. T'e i0portant t'ing is not to ta"e t'e0 personall9. T'e fa!t t'at 9ou are not in a relations'ip does not 0ean t'at 9ou are not a B!o0pleteB person and t'at 9ou are 0issing so0et'ing. @ust re0ind 9ourself w'at a wonderful person 9ou are. T'in" about 'ow !aring and loving 9ou !an be wit' t'e rig't partner. T'is will definitel9 'elp 9ou boost 9our self(!onfiden!e.

3el9 on 9our loved ones to 'elp 9ou boost 9our self(!onfiden!e= but avoid see"ing !o0pli0ents and approval fro0 people w'o want to be wit' 9ou. %o0eti0es= 9ou need reinfor!e0ent fro0 t'e people 9ou love to be!o0e 0ore self !onfident and stronger. *owever= t'ere will be people w'o will tr9 to use 9our low self estee0 to tr9 to 0anipulate 9ou and tri!" 9ou into being wit' t'e0. Avoid su!' people as t'e9 are 0ost li"el9 tr9ing to ta"e advantage of t'e situation.

4ow 9ou "now w'at to do and w'at not to do in order to boost 9our self(!onfiden!e to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up.

Coping wit' a

rea"()p if Your Ex *as C'eated

rea"ing up is 'ard even if t'e two partners >ust de!ide t'at t'e9 do not belong toget'er. *owever= a relations'ip brea"(up is 0u!' worse w'en t'e person 9ou love so 0u!' 'as !'eated on 9ou. 8n su!' !ases= t'e pain and t'e frustration are even greater. T'at is w'9 9ou need to ta"e 0ore drasti! and ti0el9 0easures to re!over.

,a"e t'e split final even if 9our ex is tr9ing to apologi?e and to get ba!" toget'er wit' 9ou. 8f 9ou 'ave de!ided to split in t'e first pla!e= t'ere is no point in !'anging 9our 0ind now. You 0a9 t'in" t'at 9ou bro"e up wit' 9our partner in a state of 'ig' e0otion and t'at t'is was a wrong de!ision. 8n t'is !ase= 9ou !an anal9?e 9our relations'ip. *owever= t'is does not 0ean t'at 9ou s'ould auto0ati!all9 forgive 9our ex if 9ou find so0e reasons to get ba!" toget'er wit' t'e0.

Give 9ourself ti0e awa9 fro0 9our ex partner to re!over fro0 t'e relations'ip brea"(up and fro0 ever9t'ing bad t'at 'as 'appened. %top all !o00uni!ation wit' t'e0. /eel free to do all t'e t'ings t'at 9ou li"e and to reorgani?e t'e priorities in 9our life. %et new goals and adopt a positive attitude.

;or" on i0proving 9our self(!onfiden!e. 3egrettabl9= a lot of people t'in" t'at t'eir partner 'as !'eated on t'e0 be!ause t'e9 are not good enoug' or be!ause t'e9 'ave done so0et'ing wrong. T'e 0ost i0portant t'ing 9ou s'ould re0e0ber is t'at no 0atter w'at 9ou 'ad done= it was 9our partner<s personal !'oi!e to !'eat on 9ou. 8n turn= 9ou s'ould not bla0e 9ourself for t'e relations'ip brea"(up. T'in" about 9our great Aualities and wonderful personalit9.

;or" on !oping wit' 9our anger. 8t is natural for 9ou to be angr9 wit' 9our ex partner for w'at t'e9 'ave done. Tr9 to experien!e t'is e0otion full9 so t'at 9ou !an get over it. T'en= 9ou 'ave to tr9 and forget about w'at 'appened. /o!using on 9our present life and t'e opportunities it presents to 9ou will !ertainl9 0a"e t'e anger go awa9 sooner or later. @ust do not !onsider vengean!e as an option. 8t will get 9ou ba!" to experien!ing negative e0otions. You 0a9 also get 'urt again in t'e end.

4ow 9ou "now 'ow to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"( up if 9ou 'ave been !'eated on. 7eep in 0ind t'at 9ou will need 9our inner strengt' to re!over fro0 ever9t'ing t'at 'as 'appened 0ore Aui!"l9.

Dealing wit' Pra!ti!al ,atters

T'ere are a lot of t'ings t'at 9ou need to ta"e

!are of after a relations'ip brea"(up. You 'ave to !ope wit' 9our e0otions. *owever= 9ou 'ave to ta"e !are of so0e pra!ti!al 0atters too. T'ese usuall9 involve ex!'anging belongings wit' 9our ex t'at 9ou 'ave left in ea!' ot'er<s 'o0es and !an!elling so0e appoint0ents t'at 9ou 'ave arranged toget'er. 8f 9ou 'ave been living toget'er= t'ings !an be a lot 0ore !o0pli!ated.

T'e 0ost i0portant t'ing after t'e relations'ip brea"(up is to resolve all pra!ti!al 0atters a0i!abl9. T'is !an be extre0el9 diffi!ult after a separation= but 9ou 'ave to do 9our best to "eep 9our feelings aside for a w'ile until all su!' 0atters are resolved. 8t is a good idea to give 9ourself so0e ti0e to go t'roug' t'e e0otional stages of t'e split and to grieve for w'at 'as 'appened and for w'at 9ou 'ave lost first. T'en= 9ou !an be 0ore !onfident and relaxed to deal wit' t'e pra!ti!al stuff.

You s'ould definitel9 0a"e 9our !o00uni!ation wit' 9our ex as for0al as possible. /igure out w'at 9ou 'ave to do separatel9 and toget'er and 0a"e a s!'edule to perfor0 t'ese tas"s. 8f 9ou need advi!e and 'elp fro0 a finan!ial !onsultant or fro0 a law9er= 9ou s'ould not 'esitate to get it. 8n general= splitting assets is a !o0plex pro!ess= so even if 9ou 'ave separated a0i!abl9= 9ou 0a9 need professional 'elp.

Do not 'esitate to as" 9our ex for so0e ti0e to fix

pra!ti!al proble0s before 9ou separate finall9. 8f 9ou do not 'ave a pla!e to 0ove into rig't after t'e relations'ip brea"(up= 9ou 0a9 want to !o0e up wit' so0e sort of te0porar9 agree0ent. %i0ilarl9= if 9ou 'ave a 0ortgage t'at 9ou will repa9 in four or six 0ont's= 9ou 0a9 prefer not to ta"e an9 a!tion to split 9our finan!ial assets until it is repaid. T'is !an 'elp 9ou get a better fres' start later on.

Tr9 to rea!' an agree0ent on all i0portant points. T'is 0a9 be extre0el9 diffi!ult after a relations'ip brea"(up= but as said earlier= 9ou 'ave to do 9our best to set 9our e0otions aside. /ig'ting over assets= wit' or wit'out law9ers= will onl9 bring 9ou 0ore pain and suffering. 4o 0atter 'ow bitter t'e separation is= 9ou s'ould not tr9 to turn 9our ex into a foe.

4ow 9ou "now 'ow to !ope wit' t'e pra!ti!al 0anners after a relations'ip brea"(up. @ust re0e0ber t'at pro!rastination is not a solution= even t'oug' 9ou s'ould allow 9ourself to feel a bit stronger e0otionall9 before 9ou get to deal wit' t'ese 0atters.

Dealing wit' t'e )rge to Conta!t Your Ex

3elations'ips often 0a"e 9ou for0 'abits. After a relations'ip brea"(up= 9ou !ertainl9 find it 'ard

to !'ange t'ese 'abits. :ne of t'e0 is see"ing !onta!t wit' 9our ex all t'e ti0e. You are used to !alling or texting t'e0 w'enever 9ou 'ave good news or bad news and w'enever 9ou >ust feel li"e as"ing t'e0 'ow t'e9 are. At present= t'is urge is even greater sin!e 9our ex is not around. 3ead on to find out 'ow to fig't it effe!tivel9.

3eali?e t'at !alling 9our ex will !ause 9ou 0ore pain t'an 9ou are alread9 experien!ing. Your for0er partner will not rea!t to 9our !all t'e sa0e wa9 as before and t'is will 0a"e 9ou feel a lot worse. T'e9 will 0ost !ertainl9 tell 9ou t'at t'e9 do not want to tal" to 9ou and t'at 9ou s'ould stop !alling t'e0. 80agine t'is 'appening ever9 ti0e 9ou feel li"e see"ing !onta!t wit' 9our ex.

,a"e !onta!ting 9our ex a 0ore !'allenging tas". 8n t'is wa9= 9ou will 'ave ti0e to t'in" twi!e before 9ou get to !onta!t t'e0. asi!all9= 9ou will 'ave 0ore ti0e to !onvin!e 9ourself not to do it. T'ere are different wa9s in w'i!' 9ou !an 0a"e !onta!ting 9our ex 0ore diffi!ult. Deleting t'e nu0ber and ot'er !onta!t details fro0 9our p'oneboo" is a good idea. 3e0ove t'e0 fro0 9our list of 8, and /a!eboo" friends. Avoid going to t'e pla!es w'ere 9ou are 0ost li"el9 to 0eet.

3epla!e t'e a!tion of !onta!ting 9ou ex wit' anot'er one t'at will auto0ati!all9 bring 9ou satisfa!tion or at least 0a"e 9ou feel less bad. T'is is a reall9 effe!tive ps9!'ologi!al tri!" t'at

9ou !an use to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. You !an appl9 it ver9 easil9. @ust sa9 to 9ourself t'at ever9 ti0e 9ou feel li"e !onta!ting 9our ex in one wa9 or anot'er t'at 9ou will !onta!t 9our best friend. e read9 to s'are ever9t'ing t'at 9ou feel li"e telling 9our ex wit' 9our friend. T'e9 will give 9ou t'e !onsolation and support 9ou need.

Tr9 to i0agine 9our life wit'out 9our ex and all t'e benefits 9ou !an get in it after t'e relations'ip brea"(up. You s'ould do t'is ever9 da9. %lowl9= t'e urge to !onta!t t'e0 will be!o0e less and it will eventuall9 go awa9. 8f 9ou are t'in"ing about 9ourself and about 9our own life all t'e ti0e= 9ou will be less li"el9 to re0ind 9ourself of 9our for0er partner. Tr9 to forget t'e0 so t'at 9ou !an !ure 9our urge to !onta!t t'e0.

/ive Co00on Traps to Avoid

,ost people tell 9ou w'at to do to over!o0e a relations'ip brea"(up. *owever= in a situation li"e t'is 9ou !ertainl9 need a lot of advi!e on w'at not to do as well. ;'en 9ou are upset= lonel9= angr9 and !onfused= 9ou !an easil9 do a lot of t'ings t'at will 0a"e 9ou feel even worse. *ere are so0e of t'e 0ain traps 9ou s'ould avoid at all !osts.

As"ing 9ourself Bw'9B is per'aps t'e worst t'ing 9ou !an do after a relations'ip brea"(up. Going

over t'e t'ings 9ou and 9our partner did and said and as"ing 9ourself w'at 'as led to t'e split is a waste of ti0e and energ9. A!!ept t'e fa!ts b9 tr9ing to 0odif9 9our life to t'e new !ir!u0stan!es. 8t is i0portant not to ta"e a brea" fro0 life= but to ta"e a!tion to i0prove t'ings to a better state w'ile leaving t'e old state be'ind.

Torturing 9our bod9 for w'at 'as 'appened is !ertainl9 not t'e rig't wa9 to 'eal. You often eit'er do not eat or 9ou overeat. You tr9 to find !onsolation in sweets or al!o'ol. You sta9 on t'e !ou!' all da9 long. All t'ese t'ings auto0ati!all9 affe!t 9our bod9 negativel9. 8n turn= 9our e0otional state will worsen. @ust tr9 not to do t'ese t'ings= but to adopt a 'ealt'9 lifest9le wit' a balan!ed diet and a lot of exer!ise. T'is will !ertainl9 'elp 9ou re!over fro0 t'e relations'ip brea"(up 0ore Aui!"l9 and effe!tivel9.

Assu0ing t'at 9ou !an be 'app9 onl9 wit' 9our ex is definitel9 a 'uge 0ista"e 9ou s'ould avoid after a relations'ip brea"(up. @ust 0a"e a list of all t'e t'ings t'at 0a"e 9ou 'app9 and t'at are not related to 9our ex. 5oo" into 9our interests to find new t'ings t'at !an 0a"e 9ou 'app9.

8solating 9ourself fro0 friends and fa0il9 is anot'er 0a>or trap to avoid. Tr9 to be around people as 0u!' as 9ou !an. Tr9 to be in t'e !o0pan9 of 9our loved ones to get t'e support and 'elp 9ou need. Do not 'esitate to s'are 'ow 9ou feel. T'is

will ta"e a lot of e0otional burden off 9our s'oulders.

T'in"ing t'e relations'ip brea"(up is t'e end of 9our life is !ertainl9 one of t'e worst t'ings 9ou !an do. Cuite t'e opposite= it is a new beginning t'at 9ou 'ave to e0bra!e. You 0a9 not see !learl9 t'e road a'ead now= but if 9ou believe in 9ourself= get toget'er and start 0a"ing new plans for t'e future= 9ou will get a fres' start.

/ive %teps to Coping wit' a

rea"()p

You 'ave t'e inner strengt' and t'e willpower to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. All 9ou need is so0e guidan!e and advi!e on w'at to do to get 9our life ba!" in 9our 'ands. /ollow t'ese steps to feel better and to start a new and better life.

E Grieve for 9our bro"en relations'ip and for t'e lost love= !are= support and drea0s. A relations'ip brea"(up is not t'e sa0e t'ing as losing a loved one= but it is Auite !lose. T'at is w'9 9ou s'ould let go of 9our e0otions and experien!e all of t'ese negative feelings t'at 9ou 'ave rig't now. T'e longer 9ou 'old in negative e0otions t'e worse 9ou will feel. 9 allowing 9ourself to grieve= 9ou will over!o0e all negative e0otions 0u!' 0ore Aui!"l9.

E Give 9our self(estee0 a boost. 8t is nor0al to lose so0e of 9our self(!onfiden!e after a relations'ip brea"(up= espe!iall9 if t'ings 'ave ended up wit' a!!usations. T'at is w'9 9ou s'ould re0ind 9ourself of 9our great Aualities and wonderful personalit9. %a9 to 9ourself t'at 9ou are a strong and independent person w'o 'as t'e abilit9 and willpower to get ever9t'ing in life.

E C'ange 9our attitude fro0 negative to positive. T'is step for !oping wit' a relations'ip brea"(up 0a9 ta"e longer to exe!ute= but 9our efforts will pa9 off in t'e end. :ne si0ple exer!ise t'at will 'elp 9ou wit' getting a positive attitude is to 0a"e a list of all t'e bad t'ings t'at 9ou are leaving be'ind and all t'e good t'ings t'at 9ou 'ave now and !an 'ave in t'e future. T'is will allow 9ou to 0a"e t'e s'ift 0ore s0oot'l9 wit'out feeling sorr9 for t'e past.

E ,a"e a plan on 'ow to i0prove 9our life. %tart b9 setting new goals for 9ourself. Getting 0ore relaxed and feeling 'appier are good general goals to 'ave and so is be!o0ing 0ore su!!essful. Do w'at it ta"es to a!!o0plis' t'ese goals. ,eet old friends and establis' new friends'ips. Do fun t'ings t'at !orrespond to 9our interests. /o!us on i0proving 9our perfor0an!e at wor".

E %tart dating again. T'is is t'e final step 9ou need to 0a"e in order to re!over full9 fro0 a relations'ip brea"(up. You need to be self(

!onfident and positive as well as over 9our last relations'ip to ta"e t'is step. @ust re0e0ber t'at dating is about 0eeting new people and so!iali?ing wit' t'e0. You need to 0a"e 0an9 0ore steps before 9ou a!tuall9 find a new life partner.

/our 3easons for 4ot 5oving Your Ex

You 0a9 not 'ave felt great in t'e !o0pan9 of 9our ex latel9. *owever= after t'e relations'ip brea"(up and after spending a few da9s wit'out t'e0= 9ou feel t'at t'e9 are t'e love of 9our life and 9ou will never ever feel 'app9 wit' an9one else. eing alone !an !ertainl9 pla9 nast9 tri!"s on 9ou= so 9ou 'ave to avoid t'e trap of putting 9our ex on a pedestal and ai0ing to get ba!" toget'er. You si0pl9 need so0e good reasons not to love 9ou ex.

Your ex does not love 9ou an90ore. T'is is a terrible t'ing to reali?e after a relations'ip brea"(up= but it is t'e trut'. 8t is not t'at t'e9 do not re!ogni?e t'at 9ou are a great person. 8t is >ust t'at 9our for0er partner<s ro0anti! feelings are gone. %in!e t'e9 do not love 9ou an90ore= 9ou !ertainl9 would not want to be wit' t'e0. ;'at is t'e point in loving so0eone w'o does not love 9ou ba!"#

Your ex does not deserve 9ou. ;'9 would 9ou love and want to get ba!" toget'er wit' so0eone w'o

wants to get awa9 fro0 all t'e wonderful t'ings 9ou !an give t'e0# 8f 9our for0er partner does not want 9ou= t'en t'e9 do not deserve 9ou. You !an readil9 find so0eone w'o will trul9 adore 9ou for w'o 9ou are.

You and 9our ex !annon sustain a 'ealt'9 relations'ip toget'er. You tried and it did not wor". You !ertainl9 put in a lot of effort in 0a"ing t'ings wor" and 9our for0er partner probabl9 did as well. *owever= apparentl9= t'ere are t'ings t'at 0a"e 9ou in!o0patible wit' ea!' ot'er in one wa9 or anot'er. T'at is w'9 9ou would not want to go ba!" to a relations'ip t'at will not give 9ou t'e benefits 9ou need and deserve.

You 'ave to love 9ourself above all. T'is is an extre0el9 i0portant reason for not loving 9our ex after t'e relations'ip brea"(up. You are better off wit'out 9our for0er partner and if 9ou 'ave at least so0e self(love 9ou will reali?e t'at 9ou 'ave to sta9 awa9 fro0 t'e0 in order to be 'app9 and 0a"e all 9our drea0s !o0e true.

4ow 9ou "now w'9 9ou s'ould not love 9our ex and see" re!on!iliation after a relations'ip brea"(up. T'e i0portant t'ing is to reali?e t'at 9ou !an be 0u!' 'appier wit'out t'e0 and need to 0a"e a plan to 0ove forward after t'e separation.

/our T'ings to 7eep in ,ind

8t is natural for 9ou to fall into t'e trap of sadness and resent0ent after a relations'ip brea"( up. *owever= t'is s'ould not be an ongoing pro!ess. ,ore i0portantl9= 9ou s'ould not torture 9ourself about t'e t'ing t'at 'appened. )se t'e following positive state0ents to get out of t'e vi!ious !9!le of negative e0otions and to feel better eventuall9. 3e0inding 9ourself of t'ese !an reall9 'elp 9ou 0ove on.

You do not deserve to suffer. T'is is essential to "eep in 0ind no 0atter w'et'er 9ou were t'e person w'o initiated t'e split or t'e one w'o got du0ped. 8n general= bot' of 9ou are to bla0e. ;'en so0et'ing goes wrong in a relations'ip= it is usuall9 be!ause t'e two people !annot find a wa9 to !ope wit' t'e diffi!ulties toget'er. T'ere is not'ing wrong or s'a0eful about t'is. ,ore i0portantl9= t'ere is not'ing t'at 9ou s'ould torture 9ourself about.

You are a wonderful person. A relations'ip brea"(up does not auto0ati!all9 0a"e 9ou a lesser person. eing in a !ouple is a great t'ing= but being single does not 0ean t'at 9our Aualities are not as good as before or t'at 9our personalit9 la!"s so0et'ing. %i0ilarl9= 9ou are not a bad person if 9ou 'ave initiated t'e split. You 'ave done t'e rig't t'ing w'i!' will 'elp 9ou and 9our ex get a better and 0ore fulfilling life.

You are better off wit'out 9our ex. T'is is probabl9 t'e 'ardest t'ing t'at 9ou need to !onvin!e 9ourself about after a relations'ip brea"( up. *owever= it is a fa!t. You 'ave to ad0it t'at t'ings were not going well between 9ou. %i0ilarl9= 9ou 'ave to re0ind 9ourself of all t'e t'ings t'at 9ou do not li"e about 9our ex. A!!ept t'e fa!t t'at t'e9 do not want to be wit' 9ou. All t'ese fa!tors 0a"e 9ou better off wit'out 9our ex= so t'is state0ent does not la!" reason and logi!.

You are strong and independent. T'ings are toug' for ever9one no 0atter w'et'er 9ou are in a relations'ip or not. *owever= if 9ou are strong and independent= 9ou will be able to !ope wit' ever9t'ing b9 9ourself. T'is will 0a"e 9ou feel and live better. ,ore i0portantl9= t'is will 'elp 9ou find 9our life partner w'o 0at!'es 9ou and 9our personalit9. esides= being independent 0eans 9ou 'ave a lot of new opportunities to get ever9t'ing 9ou 'ave ever drea0ed of and 0ore.

3epeat all of t'ese four state0ents to 9ourself and 9ou will !ope wit' t'e relations'ip brea"(up and get 9our life ba!".

Getting an 8nternal ,a"eover

T'e ti0e after a relations'ip brea"(up is a ti0e of

!'ange. Ever9t'ing around 9ou !'anges and if 9ou do not s'ow enoug' flexibilit9 9ou will be stu!" in an unprodu!tive= un'ealt'9 and 0iserable situation. T'e best t'ing to do to avoid literall9 ruining 9our life is to 'ave an internal 0a"eover. asi!all9= 9ou 'ave to wor" on 9our e0otions and perspe!tive to be!o0e a better new 9ou.

oost 9our self(estee0 first. Confiden!e is t'e 0ain t'ing 9ou need after experien!ing all t'e bitterness of a relations'ip brea"(up. /orget about w'at 9our ex t'oug't and said. /o!us on all t'e wonderful Aualities 9ou 'ave. 8f 9ou feel li"e 9ou need to !'ange 9our loo"s in order to get greater self(!onfiden!e= do so. C'ange 9our 'air st9le and get so0e new !lot'es and a!!essories. T'is is appli!able to gu9s as well as to girls.

Adopt a positive attitude. Your in!reased self( estee0 will !ertainl9 'elp wit' t'is. 8n addition= tr9 to i0aging all t'e great t'ings t'at !an 'appen in 9our life after t'e relations'ip brea"(up. You 'ave 0ore ti0e to do all t'ings t'at interest 9ou. You will be able to put a greater fo!us on 9our !areer. ,ost i0portantl9= 9ou 'ave endless opportunities to 0eet new people= start new friends'ips and per'aps even a new relations'ip.

;or" on 9our so!ial s"ills. eing in a relations'ip 0a"es 9ou 0ore wit'drawn fro0 ot'er people. 8t is nor0al to spend 0ore ti0e wit' 9our partner instead of 0eeting and tal"ing wit' ot'er people. 4ow 9ou

need to i0prove 9our so!ial s"ills so t'at 9ou !an !ope wit' t'e relations'ip brea"(up and be on top of t'ings in 9our !urrent situation. T'e best wa9 to 0a"e t'is i0prove0ent is to so!iali?e wit' 0ore and different people 0ore often.

e opti0isti! about t'e future. You 0ade plans wit' 9our ex and 9ou 'ad drea0s about 9our life toget'er. 4ow 9ou see ever9t'ing ruined. *owever= t'is does not 0ean t'at 9our future is ruined as well. You !an 'ave a wonderful life and even 0a"e 0an9 of t'e drea0s 9ou 'ad wit' 9our ex !o0e true wit'out t'e0. T'e i0portant t'ing is not to feel fear and anxiet9 about t'e future. 3e0ind 9ourself 'ow strong 9ou are and w'at a great person 9ou are. You !ertainl9 deserve onl9 t'e best.

4ow 9ou "now 'ow to get an internal 0a"eover to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up and 0ove forward. )se all of t'ese tips to get w'at 9ou want fro0 life and 0ore.

Getting t'e %upport You 4eed

8t is nor0al for 9ou to feel alone and upset after splitting up wit' 9our partner. 8n fa!t= ps9!'ologists sa9 t'at 9ou s'ould grieve so t'at 9ou !an 'eal faster e0otionall9. T'is is >ust one of t'e t'ings t'at 9ou !an do to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. Anot'er i0portant t'ing to

do is to get as 0u!' support as 9ou need.

You 0a9 feel wa9 too upset and per'aps even a bit as'a0ed about w'at 'as 'appened between 9ou and 9our partner. *owever= t'is does not 0ean t'at 9ou s'ould avoid tal"ing to ot'er people and s'aring wit' t'e0. Cuite t'e opposite= 9ou s'ould definitel9 a!!ept t'e support t'e9 offer to 9ou in su!' !ir!u0stan!es.

Your loved ones want to 'elp 9ou over!o0e t'e relations'ip brea"(up= so all 9ou 'ave to do is let t'e0 do it. Tal" to t'e0 and s'are 'ow 9ou feel. T'e9 will give 9ou t'e understanding and advi!e 9ou need to feel better. T'e9 will be t'ere for 9ou to 'elp 9ou !ope wit' an9 diffi!ulties. ,ore i0portantl9= 9our loved ones will 'elp 9ou start a new and better life= so 9ou s'ould definitel9 a!!ept t'eir support and 'elp.

Consider >oining a support group. You 0a9 t'in" group support is for people wit' addi!tions or !'roni! illnesses= but t'is is !ertainl9 not t'e !ase. An9one w'o 'as e0otional proble0s and finds it diffi!ult to !ope wit' life !an find support fro0 people w'o are in t'e sa0e !ir!u0stan!es.

T'ere are plent9 of support groups for people w'o are tr9ing to over!o0e relations'ip brea"(ups. 8f 9ou do not want to attend 0eetings in person= 9ou 0a9 want to >oin an online support group. T'e

i0portant t'ing is to find people w'o will understand 9ou and 'elp 9ou b9 s'aring t'eir experien!e wit' 9ou.

Get professional support fro0 a ps9!'ologist or ps9!'iatrist= if 9ou feel 9ou !annot !ontrol 9our life and e0otions. Getting su!' 'elp in t'e for0 of !ounseling does not 0ean t'at 9ou are 0entall9 ill. Cuite t'e opposite getting 'elp to !ope wit' 9our relations'ip brea"(up on ti0e will prote!t 9ou fro0 running into 0ore serious proble0s= su!' as !lini!al depression or anxiet9 disorder. Your p'9si!ian 0a9 be able to re!o00end a ps9!'ologist or ps9!'iatrist t'at spe!iali?es in !ases li"e 9ours.

)se all of t'ese 0et'ods for getting support to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. 3e0e0ber t'at t'ere is not'ing to be as'a0ed of. T'e ti0elier t'e support 9ou get is t'e easier it will be for 9ou to over!o0e t'e proble0 and get a new start in life.

*elpful Dating Advi!e

You s'ould go t'roug' all t'e stages of relations'ip brea"(up re!over9= before 9ou start dating. T'is is t'e first and t'e 0ost i0portant rule to "eep w'en it !o0es to seeing ot'er people after a split. You s'ould 'ave grieved and adopted a new life plan before starting to date.

)nderstanding t'e idea be'ind dating is eAuall9 i0portant for full9 re!overing and to avoid being 'urt and suffering again. 8n its essen!e= it is all about 0eeting different people and so!iali?ing wit' t'e0. Going on a date wit' so0eone does not auto0ati!all9 0ean t'at 9ou will start a new relations'ip wit' t'is person. Expe!t to 'ave a good ti0e wit' t'e person= but not'ing 0ore. T'is will 'elp 9ou get t'e rig't 0indset for dating after a relations'ip brea"(up.

C'oose !arefull9 t'e people 9ou go out wit'. A lot of singles w'o 'ave re!entl9 split up wit' t'eir partner t'in" t'at t'e9 s'ould be!o0e part of a !ouple again no 0atter w'at. 8n turn= t'e9 start seeing a lot of different people. T'is is !ertainl9 a serious 0ista"e to avoid. Go out wit' people t'at 9ou t'in" 9ou 0a9 li"e. 5earn 0ore about t'e person a friend is tr9ing to Bset 9ou up wit'B. Consider a blind date onl9 if 9ou are absolutel9 !onfident and se!ure about 0eeting a stranger.

Ta"e t'ings slowl9. T'is refers to t'e point 0ade in t'e beginning. T'e idea be'ind dating is not to find a life partner= but to so!iali?e wit' people. T'at is w'9 9ou s'ould not 0a"e an9 big steps. 8f 9ou feel t'at 9ou li"e t'e person 9ou go on a date wit'= 9ou s'ould arrange anot'er fun ti0e toget'er. ut in general= it is a good idea to "eep so0e distan!e fro0 a person 9ou do not "now well. T'is will prote!t 9ou fro0 being 'urt again rig't after a!'ieving relations'ip brea"(up re!over9.

e prepared to experien!e so0e disappoint0ents. T'e people 9ou date 0a9 not turn out to be rig't for 9ou at all. 8n addition= 9ou !an expe!t so0e nast9 surprises= su!' as 9our date not !alling 9ou again or avoiding 9ou. You 'ave to understand t'at t'is is all part of t'e pro!ess. Tr9 not to ta"e t'ings personall9= but to "eep 9our self(estee0 'ig'. Do not bla0e 9ourself if an9t'ing goes wrong. After all= 9ou would want to be wit' a person w'o li"es 9ou for w'o 9ou trul9 are.

T'is is 'ow to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up and start dating again to !o0plete t'e full re!over9 !9!le.

*ow ,u!' Ti0e Do You 4eed#

A lot of people want to "now w'at t'e relations'ip brea"(up re!over9 ti0e is. T'e realit9 is t'at t'ere is not a set ti0e in w'i!' 9ou !an re!over full9. T'is is 0ainl9 be!ause all people are different. 8n addition= full re!over9 is 'ard to define as it is a stri!tl9 individual 0atter. *owever= 9ou !an get so0e idea of 'ow 0u!' ti0e 9ou will need to get 9our life ba!" on tra!". T'ere are also different wa9s in w'i!' 9ou !an speed up t'e pro!ess.

Ta"e 9our ti0e to re!over after a relations'ip

brea"(up. T'is is probabl9 t'e best advi!e an9one !an give 9ou. 8n general= t'ere are t'ree 0ain steps for a!!o0plis'ing full re!over9 so 9ou 'ave to !o0plete t'e0 all. Grieving for 9our relations'ip is t'e first stage of t'e pro!ess. T'en 9ou 'ave to wor" on i0proving 9our self(estee0 and on getting a positive attitude. After t'is= 9ou 'ave to be able to devise a plan for 0oving forward and start i0ple0enting it.

8n general= 9ou s'ould tr9 to ai0 for getting to t'e next step of t'e pro!ess all t'e ti0e. T'is is parti!ularl9 true for grieving. T'e fa!t t'at 9ou s'ould let go of 9our e0otions does not 0ean t'at 9ou s'ould sit on 9our !ou!' all da9 long feeling sorr9 for 9ourself. Along wit' t'is= 9ou s'ould tr9 to reali?e 9our need to boost 9our self(estee0 so t'at 9ou !an get to t'e next stage.

8t is not true t'at t'e longer t'e relations'ip was t'e 0ore ti0e 9ou need to re!over fro0 t'e split. T'e ti0e it ta"es to re!over a!tuall9 depends on 'ow 9ou feel and 'ow read9 9ou are to 0ove on. T'at is w'9 9ou s'ould not 'esitate to 0a"e 9our relations'ip brea"(up re!over9 period longer. Again= re0e0ber t'at 9ou 'ave to wor" towards i0proving 9our life and to avoid fo!using on 'ow bad 9ou feel.

You s'ould not loo" ba!" so t'at 9ou !an re!over 0ore Aui!"l9. ;'at 9ou 'ave to do is to a!!ept t'e fa!t t'at ever9t'ing is over and t'at t'ere is no

wa9 ba!" at least for t'e ti0e being. ;'enever 9ou t'in" about 9our ex and all t'e wonderful 0o0ents 9ou 'ave 'ad toget'er= 9ou s'ould re0ind 9ourself of t'e relations'ip brea"(up and its !auses. T'is will "eep 9ou down to eart' and 'elp 9ou re!over 0ore Aui!"l9.

:verall= it does not 0atter 'ow long 9our relations'ip brea"(up re!over9 ta"es. T'e i0portant t'ing is to re!over full9 and be!o0e a better person w'o is read9 to get 0ore out of life.

*ow to Avoid *ealt' Dangers after a

rea" )p

8t is perfe!tl9 natural for 9ou to feel down and to find it diffi!ult to !ope wit' dail9 life after a relations'ip brea"(up. ,ost experts re!o00end grieving for w'at 'as 'appened so t'at 9ou !an get over it. *owever= 9ou s'ould be !areful not to fall into so0e serious traps t'at !an end up wit' 9ou developing serious 0edi!al !onditions. )se t'e following tips to preserve 9our p'9si!al and ps9!'ologi!al wellbeing.

Depression !an be avoided b9 adopting a variet9 of different 0easures. 8t is essential for 9ou to be around 9our loved ones so t'at 9ou !an get t'e understanding and support 9ou need. ,eet wit' 9our friends and 'ave fun wit' t'e0. /ind a new 'obb9. Tr9 0a"ing s0all steps towards building 9our new

lifest9le.

Anxiet9 'as to be avoided after a relations'ip brea"(up. 8t is natural for 9ou to worr9 about t'e future given t'at 9ou no longer 'ave t'e support and love of 9our partner. T'e best wa9 to avoid worr9ing about bad t'ings 'appening to 9ou is to set realisti! goals for t'e future and 0a"e plans on 'ow to a!'ieve t'e0. T'in" of all t'e t'ings t'at 9ou want to get in life and start wor"ing towards getting t'e0.

ingeing and buli0ia Fbingeing and purgingG are ot'er serious 'ealt' issues t'at 0a9 be present after a relations'ip brea"(up. You 0a9 t'in" t'ese !an o!!ur due to p'9siologi!al reasons= but t'is is not t'e !ase. %adness= un!ertaint9= fear= !onfusion and low self(estee0 are >ust so0e of t'e 0ain ps9!'ologi!al fa!tors t'at !an lead to bingeing and buli0ia.

T'e best t'ing 9ou !an do to avoid t'ese proble0s is to wor" on !oping wit' 9our e0otions after t'e relations'ip brea"(up. Do all t'e t'ings des!ribed above to i0prove 9our ps9!'ologi!al 'ealt'. At t'e sa0e ti0e= avoid using food as a 0eans for feeling better. Tr9 to feel better b9 tal"ing to a friend= going out or attending a !lass in 9oga or dan!ing. Do 9our best to sti!" to 9our traditional diet and i0prove it= if it is not 'ealt'9.

Al!o'ol abuse is anot'er danger to avoid at all !osts. ,u!' li"e eating ex!essive a0ounts of food= drin"ing will not 0a"e 9ou feel better in t'e long run. T'e si0ple rule to "eep is never to drin" w'en 9ou are feeling down. )se ot'er 0eans to over!o0e negative e0otions= su!' as t'e ones des!ribed in t'e previous paragrap'.

4ow 9ou "now w'at to do to avoid serious proble0s after a relations'ip brea"(up.

*ow to

e!o0e 8ndependent Again

;'en 9ou are in a relations'ip= 9our lifest9le and dail9 routine 0a9 !'ange dra0ati!all9. T'e sa0e will 'ave to 'appen after a relations'ip brea"(up as well. T'e proble0 is t'at 0an9 people find it diffi!ult to be independent again and to organi?e t'eir new life and dail9 s!'edule so t'at t'e9 feel good. T'e following advi!e will 'elp 9ou over!o0e t'is proble0.

/ind alternatives to all of t'e t'ings t'at 9ou used to do toget'er wit' 9our ex. T'is is a great wa9 to start. 9 repla!ing one routine wit' anot'er= 9ou will not 'ave to deal wit' e0ptiness and regret. 8t is not parti!ularl9 diffi!ult to !o0e up wit' alternatives if 9ou reall9 tr9.

T'ere are nu0erous fun t'ings 9ou !an do. 8f 9ou and 9our ex used to go to t'e 0ovies toget'er= 9ou 0a9 !onsider going to t'e 0ovies wit' friends or going to see a pla9 or an opera for a !'ange. %i0ilarl9= if 9ou used to 'ave brea"fast in bed= 9ou !an now find a ba"er9 nearb9 and go grab so0et'ing deli!ious fro0 t'ere.

/o!us on ot'er priorities in 9our life. T'ere are !ertainl9 t'ings t'at 9ou want to a!!o0plis' and en>o9 b9 9ourself. 4ow t'ese priorities !an go ba!" to t'eir top position= sin!e t'e relations'ip brea"(up is final. %et goals based on 9our priorities and do ever9t'ing to a!'ieve t'e0. T'is will !ertainl9 0a"e 9ou over!o0e t'e separation 0ore Aui!"l9 and get a fres' start.

8t is nor0al for one of 9our priorities after t'e relations'ip brea"(up to be finding a life partner. @ust be !areful wit' t'is one and do not go to extre0es >ust to get ba!" to w'ere 9ou started. En>o9 9our life as an independent and !onfident person. e open to all sorts of new opportunities. T'e i0portant t'ing is not to B!at!' t'e first busB out of desperation.

Adopt effe!tive ti0e 0anage0ent. T'is is one of t'e best anti(stress treat0ents and it !an reall9 'elp if 9ou are still depressed about t'e relations'ip brea"(up. ;'at 9ou 'ave to do is to organi?e ever9 da9 of t'e wee" so t'at 9ou "now w'en to do w'at. T'is will 'elp 9ou sta9 on tra!" wit' 9our tas"s at

wor" as well as wit' t'e new fun t'ings t'at 9ou will do as an independent person.

4ow 9ou "now 'ow to start 9our new life after t'e relations'ip brea"(up as a strong and independent person. e opti0isti! and 0a"e plans for t'e future.

*ow to Co(Parent wit' 9our Ex

T'e fa!t t'at 9ou 'ave !'ildren definitel9 0a"es 9our relations'ip brea"(up 0u!' 'arder to !ope wit'. 8t is i0portant for 9ou to get over 9our ex and to re!over. *owever= it is eAuall9 i0portant to 0a"e 9our !'ildren feel loved and supported b9 bot' of t'eir parents. 8n order to a!'ieve t'is= 9ou 'ave to establis' a new t9pe of relations'ip wit' 9our ex. )se t'e following tips to start off well.

Establis' a business partner relations'ip wit' 9our ex. T'e idea 'ere is to put all e0otions aside and to fo!us on t'e !o00on business 9ou 'ave ( 9our "ids. T'is 0a9 be 'ard at first= but 9ou 'ave to "eep in 0ind t'at it is i0portant for 9our !'ildren to be wit' bot' parents and to feel eAuall9 !o0fortable and loved in t'e two new fa0il9 environ0ents.

Tr9 to rea!' an agree0ent wit' 9our ex on all

i0portant points regarding t'e raising of 9our !'ildren after t'e relations'ip brea"(up. T'ese in!lude rules t'at t'e "ids 'ave to abide b9= t'eir dail9 s!'edule= dis!ipline and edu!ation= to na0e t'e 0ost i0portant ones. You 0a9 'ave found it 'ard to agree on su!' 0atters before'and and it 0a9 be even 0ore diffi!ult now. *owever= 9ou s'ould tr9 to do 9our best to !o0e up wit' adeAuate solutions.

Do not let sadness= resent0ent and anger affe!t 9our !o00uni!ation and new relations'ip wit' 9our ex. 8t is natural for 9ou to get angr9 about a de!ision about 9our "ids t'at t'e9 'ave ta"en wit'out !onsulting 9ou first. *owever= 9ou 'ave to tr9 to resolve 0atters a0iabl9. Tr9 not to be stubborn. Tr9 to 0a"e suggestions rat'er t'an stating 9our de!isions. En!ourage 9our ex to do t'e sa0e.

4ever resolve an9 0atters in front of 9our !'ildren after t'e relations'ip brea"(up. You s'ould !ertainl9 tal" wit' 9our ex w'en 9our "ids are around. *owever= w'en 9ou 'ave to resolve an issue of an9 t9pe= 9ou s'ould do it privatel9 so t'at 9ou !an prote!t 9our "ids fro0 listening to 0o009 and dadd9 fig'ting again. You would !ertainl9 not want t'at.

/inall9= 0a"e 9our !'ildren feel as !o0fortable as possible in t'e new situation after t'e relations'ip brea"(up. Avoid using t'e0 as 0essengers between 9ou and 9our ex partner. Put a

suffi!ient a0ount of ti0e and effort to explaining t'e new situation to t'e0 and w'at steps t'e9 will need to ta"e to ad>ust. Establis' drop off ti0es and a routine and a s!'edule for pa!"ing before 9our "ids go to t'eir dadH0o0.

*ow to Cope if Your Ex

ro"e it :ff

You didn<t want to end t'e relations'ip= but 9our partner ended it. ;'at to do next# *ow to !ope wit' t'e relations'ip brea"(up# )se t'e following tips to re!over 0ore Aui!"l9 and get 9our life ba!".

A!!ept t'e fa!t t'at t'e relations'ip is over. Do not see" an9 !onta!t wit' 9our ex. Tr9 not to tr9 to 0eet t'e0 Bb9 a!!identB. T'ere is no point in tr9ing to fix t'ings between 9ou and a person w'o does not want to be wit' 9ou. 8t is true t'at 9ou 0a9 'ave 'ad great 0o0ents toget'er= but t'e realit9 is different now. Don<t fo!us on t'e past.

Allow 9ourself to grieve. T'is is part of a!!epting t'e loss after a relations'ip brea"(up. 8t is natural for 9ou to be 'urt and sad. 8t is nor0al to be anxious about t'e future t'at 9ou were 'oping to spend toget'er wit' 9our partner. Experien!e t'ese e0otions full9. Allow 9ourself to feel sad and angr9. T'is will 'elp 9ou over!o0e t'ese e0otions 0ore Aui!"l9.

Do not bla0e 9ourself for t'e split. T'is is per'aps t'e 0ost i0portant t'ing t'at 9ou s'ould do if t'e relations'ip brea"(up was initiated b9 9our partner. T'e fa!t t'at t'e9 de!ided to end it does not 0ean t'at t'ere is an9t'ing wrong wit' 9ou. Even if 9ou were not t'e perfe!t partner= t'is does not 0ean t'at 9our partner did not 'ave t'e !'an!e to tr9 to fix t'ings between 9ou before initiating t'e split.

A!!ept t'at 9ou are a great person w'o >ust !ould not 0at!' anot'er person. Do not lower 9our self estee0 >ust be!ause 9our partner left 9ou. Do not t'in" t'at 9ou are in!apable of being wit' so0eone else.

Avoid vengean!e at all !osts. You 0a9 be angr9 and 'urt and 9ou 0a9 want to 'urt 9our ex too. *owever= 9ou s'ould !onsider t'e fa!t t'at t'e9 0a9 be suffering too. 8n addition= t'in" about t'e !onseAuen!es 9our vengean!e will bring. ;ill it 0a"e 9ou feel better to see 9our ex suffer or will it 'urt 9ou even 0ore#

A relations'ip brea"(up is not t'e end of t'e world. After grieving for so0e ti0e= 0a"e a plan for 9our present life as a single. /ind ti0e for 9ourself to get t'e relaxation 9ou need. /ind fun t'ings to do. Go out wit' 9our friends. ,eet new people.

)se all of t'ese tips to re!over after a relations'ip brea"(up. 3e0e0ber t'at it is up to 9ou to 0a"e t'ings better.

*ow to Cope w'en Your Ex /inds a 4ew Partner

T'ere are a nu0ber of t'ings t'at !an 0a"e a relations'ip brea"(up even worse t'an it alread9 is. 8f 9our ex finds a new partner rig't after t'e brea" up= t'is !an !ertainl9 0a"e 9ou feel even 0ore devastated t'an 9ou would be ot'erwise. 3ead on to find out 'ow to avoid t'is and 'ow to get on wit' 9our life better t'an ever before.

Do not fo!us on 9our ex<s new partner. Tr9 not to as" friends and a!Auaintan!es about t'e0. ,ore i0portantl9= do not as" 9ourself w'9 9our ex 'as got over 9ou so Aui!"l9 and w'et'er t'eir new partner is better t'an 9ou. 8t is natural to feel an urge to t'in" su!' t'ings= but t'e trut' is t'at 9ou will end up being 0ore 'urt= sadder and angrier t'an before.

/o!us on 9ourself. T'e fa!t t'at 9our ex 'as a new partner does not 0ean t'at t'ere was or is so0et'ing wrong wit' 9ou. You are still a wonderful person wit' lots of ex!ellent Aualities. You will be able to see t'is !learl9 if 9ou do not !o0pare 9ourself wit' 9our ex<s new partner.

80prove 9our life as 0u!' as 9ou !an. T'ere are so 0an9 wonderful t'ings in life. ;'at is t'e point of 0issing t'e0 in order to worr9 about 9our relations'ip brea"(up= 9our ex and t'eir new partner# You !ertainl9 "now t'e answer to t'is Auestion. Do all t'e t'ings t'at 9ou 'ave wanted to do and t'at !orrespond to 9our interests and life goals. Tr9 to 0a"e 9ourself feel 'app9= relaxed and opti0isti! about t'e future.

Do not tr9 to get ba!" at 9our ex and at t'eir new partner. T'is will not 'elp 9ou !ope wit' t'e relations'ip brea"(up in an9 wa9. Cuite t'e opposite= 9ou will 0ost li"el9 feel worse t'an before. Getting in a new relations'ip >ust to s'ow 9our ex t'at 9ou are better t'an t'e0 will not bring 9ou an9 positives. You 0a9 end up even 0ore disappointed in t'e end. %i0ilarl9= tr9ing to s'ow 9our ex t'at 9ou are better t'an t'eir new partner !an put 9ou in a reall9 e0barrassing situation.

4ow 9ou "now 'ow to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea" up in !ase 9our ex starts a new relations'ip wit' so0eone else straig't awa9. T'e i0portant t'ing is not to pa9 attention to t'eir life and to avoid getting ba!" at t'e0. 3e0e0ber t'at it is all about 9ou and t'e wonderful future 9ou !an 'ave.

*ow to Cope wit' Depression

After splitting wit' 9our partner= 9ou 0a9 feel sad and experien!e 'opelessness and wort'lessness. 8f t'ese feelings persist for over two wee"s and start preventing 9ou fro0 perfor0ing 9our dail9 tas"s= t'en 9ou are 0ost li"el9 suffering fro0 t'e depression !aused b9 t'e relations'ip brea"(up. T'an"full9= t'ere are wa9s in w'i!' 9ou !an !ope wit' t'e situation.

Tal" to 9our do!tor first. T'is 0a9 see0 li"e a desperate step= sin!e 0ost people !onsider a relations'ip brea"(up to be so0et'ing t'at is not as serious as a 0edi!al !ondition. *owever= if 9ou 'ave signs of depression= getting 0edi!al 'elp in ti0e !an prote!t 9ou fro0 getting 0edi!ations and t'erap9 for a long ti0e in t'e future. Your do!tor will run so0e tests to 0a"e a diagnosis. T'e9 will also re!o00end a spe!ialist t'at 9ou !an see.

Consider getting t'e depression treat0ent re!o00ended to 9ou. 8f 9ou 'ave seen a spe!ialist earl9 on= 9ou s'ould be able to over!o0e t'e proble0 wit' so0e !ounseling or ps9!'ot'erap9. 8n general= it is best to avoid ta"ing 0edi!ation unless t'is is absolutel9 ne!essar9.

3el9 'eavil9 on self('elp to !ope wit' t'e depression resulting fro0 t'e relations'ip brea"( up. 4o 0atter 'ow 0u!' !ounseling or t'erap9 9ou get= 9ou 'ave to find inner strengt' to !ope wit' t'e proble0. :ne of t'e best wa9s to !ope wit'

depression is to en>o9 t'e !o0pan9 of ot'er people.

You s'ould 0eet wit' 9our loved ones 0ore often. You s'ould spend 0ore ti0e wit' 9our friends and go out wit' t'e0. You s'ould 0eet new people. You 0a9 !onsider >oining a support group if 9ou feel t'at 9ou need to s'are 9our experien!e and e0otions wit' people w'o are or 'ave been in a si0ilar situation. /inding a 'obb9 is a great wa9 to !ope wit' depression and wit' a relations'ip brea"(up in general. Doing voluntar9 wor" t'at involves 'elping ot'er is a great wa9 to stop feeling wort'less and to get 9our self estee0 ba!".

,a"e wee"l9 and dail9 plans to follow. Getting organi?ed !an reall9 'elp 9ou gain !ontrol over 9our life again. 8f 9ou 'ave a routine to follow= it will be easier for 9ou to avoid fo!using on 9our feelings and negative e0otions. /ind t'ings t'at 0otivate 9ou and "eep 9ou going. %et new goals for 9ourself= su!' as getting pro0oted at wor".

*aving a 'ealt'9 lifest9le is essential for !oping wit' depression after a relations'ip brea"(up. A balan!ed diet full of fruit and vegetables will !ertainl9 0a"e 9ou feel a lot better. Exer!ise !an 0a"e 9ou feel better and give 9ou 0ore energ9 as well.

*ow to Cope wit' E0ptiness

:ne of t'e 0ost !o00on proble0s after a split is relations'ip brea"(up e0ptiness. You feel li"e 9ou no longer 'ave so0eone to tal" to and to s'are wit'. You will t'at 9ou are !o0pletel9 alone in t'e world. You feel t'at 9ou will never be 'app9 again. T'is is a natural state of 0ind= w'i!' usuall9 o!!urs s'ort after ever9t'ing is over. *owever= 9ou !an deal wit' it using 9our inner strengt' and t'e following advi!e.

Grieve= if 9ou 'ave not grieved for 9our relations'ip alread9. T'is will allow 9ou to ta"e 9our e0otions out. 8n turn= 9ou will feel a lot better. @ust re0e0ber t'at 9ou !annot grieve forever. You 'ave to be willing and read9 to ta"e t'e following steps as well.

Do not sta9 alone. 8t is true t'at 'aving ot'er people around 9ou 0a9 not !ure t'e relations'ip brea"(up e0ptiness 9ou feel= but being in t'e !o0pan9 of ot'er people !an prevent 9ou fro0 feeling so lonel9. 8t is best to surround 9ourself wit' people w'o reall9 love 9ou and !are for 9ou. 8f 9ou feel 9ou need additional 'elp= 9ou s'ould not 'esitate to turn to a support group. %'aring will !ertainl9 'elp 9ou over!o0e t'e e0ptiness 9ou feel.

Do not tr9 to get ba!" wit' 9our ex. You 0a9 feel t'at getting ba!" wit' 9our ex partner will fill in t'e e0ptiness 9ou feel. T'is 0a9 'appen= but t'e

realit9 is t'at 9ou will end up 'aving t'e sa0e proble0s as before t'e split ( if 9our ex is read9 for re!on!iliation at all. You will feel 0u!' better b9 getting a 'old of 9our life and tr9ing to i0prove it.

Do not >u0p into a rebound relations'ip to fill in t'e relations'ip brea"(up e0ptiness. T'is is anot'er i0portant 0ista"e to avoid. T'e fa!t t'at 9ou need to be wit' so0eone s'ould not 0a"e 9ou get toget'er wit' so0eone for w'o0 9ou 'ave no real feelings. T'is 0a9 0a"e 9ou feel worse. 8t will be diffi!ult for 9ou to be 'app9 wit' a person w'o 9ou do not love.

,a"e a plan to 0ove forward b9 fo!using on ot'er t'ings in life t'at are i0portant to 9ou= apart fro0 being wit' so0eone. You 0a9 want to ta"e up a 'obb9= learn a new language or i0prove so0e of 9our existing s"ills. You 0a9 want to devote 0ore ti0e to relaxation and to 0eeting new people. You 0a9 want to wor" for advan!ing in 9our !areer.

)se all of t'ese tips for !oping wit' relations'ip brea"(up e0ptiness.

*ow to Get :ver Your Ex

You "now t'at ever9t'ing is final. You 'ave

a!!epted t'e relations'ip brea"(up. *owever= 9ou still t'in" t'at 9our ex is perfe!t and 9ou put t'e0 on a pedestal. T'e realit9 is t'at even t'oug' 9ou 0a9 a!!ept t'e separation= feeling t'is wa9 about 9our ex !an a!tuall9 prevent 9ou fro0 getting a fres' start. T'at is w'9 9ou 'ave to ta"e a!tion to fix t'is proble0.

T'e first t'ing to do is to !onvin!e 9ourself t'at 9our ex is a!tuall9 not perfe!t. T'e strange t'ing is t'at we tend to see a lot of t'e i0perfe!tions so0eone 'as w'en we are toget'er wit' t'e0. After t'e relations'ip brea"(up= we tend to re0e0ber onl9 t'e great t'ings about t'e0. You 'ave to get out of t'is !9!le. %i0pl9 tr9 to re0e0ber all t'e t'ings about 9our ex t'at used to 0a"e 9ou anno9ed= upset and angr9. T'is will !ertainl9 get t'eir real i0age ba!" into 9our 0ind.

A!!ept t'e fa!t t'at 9our ex is not rig't for 9ou. 8t is true t'at t'e9 0a9 'ave wonderful Aualities apart fro0 t'e not so good ones. *owever= t'is does not 0ean t'at 9ou are rig't for one anot'er. @ust re0ind 9ourself of all t'e irre!on!ilable differen!es t'at 9ou 'ave. ,a9be 9ou li"e different t'ings and 9ou 'ave different goals in life. T'ese are 0a>or reasons for not being wit' so0eoneI w'9 9ou s'ould fo!us on loo"ing for a new life partner w'o will s'are 9our values= beliefs= drea0s and goals.

You are not Bin!o0pleteB wit'out 9our ex. T'is is

anot'er fa!t 9ou need to a!!ept in order to re!over after a relations'ip brea"(up and get over 9our ex partner. You now "now t'at 9our ex is not perfe!t and t'at 9ou are not rig't for one anot'er. *owever= 9ou still feel t'at despite all t'is= 9ou !o0plete ea!' ot'er and t'at t'ere is no wa9 in w'i!' 9ou !an find so0eone better for t'e purpose. Even worse= 9ou 0a9 feel t'at 9ou do not deserve so0eone better.

T'e best wa9 to over!o0e all t'ese negative t'oug'ts after t'e relations'ip brea"(up is to boost 9our self !onfiden!e. T'in" of it t'is wa9= 9ou are a !o0plete person as 9ou are. You 'ave a great personalit9 and a0a?ing Aualities. Your tas" is to find so0eone w'o will appre!iate all t'at 9ou offer and love 9ou for w'o 9ou trul9 are. T'ere is no point in going ba!" to so0eone w'o 0a"es 9ou feel bad.

*ow to *elp Your C'ildren Cope

A relations'ip brea"(up !an be devastating for adults. You !an onl9 i0agine 'ow 9our !'ildren 0a9 feel w'en t'eir parents split. T'at is w'9 9ou s'ould do 9our best to 'elp 9ourself and 9our "ids over!o0e t'e 'ard ti0es and get ba!" to 9our nor0al life toget'er.

Tell 9our !'ildren t'e trut' about t'e separation.

Explain w'9 it 'as 'appened using si0ple words. e prepared to answer a lot of Auestions. You s'ould also explain to 9our !'ildren t'at 9ou and 9our ex partner bot' love t'e0 ver9 0u!'. You s'ould not 'esitate to tell 9our "ids t'at t'e new situation will a!tuall9 !ontribute to "eeping 'ealt'9 and strong bonds wit'in 9our fa0il9. 8t is i0portant to 0a"e 9our !'ildren understand t'at t'e relations'ip brea"(up does not put an end to 9our fa0il9.

Tr9 to !o00uni!ate wit' 9our ex as a0i!abl9 as possibl9. You s'ould wor" toget'er to find t'e best solutions for 9our !'ildren<s life. 4o 0atter 'ow upset and per'aps angr9 9ou are wit' 9our ex= 9ou s'ould do 9our best not to sa9 an9t'ing bad about t'e0 in front of t'e "ids. T'is 0a9 be Auite 'ard to a!'ieve= espe!iall9 given t'e fa!t t'at 9ou will feel better onl9 after letting go of 9our e0otions. T'at is w'9 9ou 0a9 see" 0ore support and 'elp fro0 9our loved ones and !onsider >oining a relations'ip brea"(up support group.

,a"e 9our !'ildren as !o0fortable as possible wit' t'e !'anges in t'eir life after t'e relations'ip brea"(up. Explain 'ow t'eir lifest9le will differ. ,a"e !'anges in t'eir dail9 routine= if an9= less drasti!. You s'ould definitel9 tr9 to spend 0ore ti0e wit' 9our "ids after t'e separation. 8t is also a good idea for 9ou to organi?e different a!tivities t'at 9ou !an do toget'er.

*elp 9our !'ildren express t'eir feelings and

listen to w'at t'e9 'ave to sa9. You s'ould en!ourage t'e0 to s'are wit' 9ou. You s'ould not 'esitate to as" t'e0 'ow t'e9 feel. %i0ilarl9= no 0atter 'ow 'urt 9ou 0a9 feel= 9ou s'ould listen to w'at t'e9 'ave to sa9. You !an expe!t 9our !'ildren to be upset= !onfused and per'aps even angr9. 5et t'e0 express t'ese feelings and tr9 to 'elp t'e0 0ove towards positive ones.

5ast but not least= 9ou s'ould devote 0ore ti0e and effort to 0onitoring 9our !'ildren<s be'avior after t'e relations'ip brea"(up. Younger !'ildren as well as teenagers 0a9 'ave proble0s at s!'ool and engage into dangerous be'avior given t'e e0otional stress t'e9 are going t'roug'. T'at is w'9 9ou s'ould do 9our best to prevent= re!ogni?e and deal wit' su!' proble0s.

*ow to 80prove /uture 3elations'ips

:ne of t'e wa9s to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"( up is to anal9?e w'at 'as gone wrong wit' 9our previous relations'ip and to 0a"e a solid plan 'ow to avoid repeat t'e sa0e 0ista"es in t'e future. T'is !an reall9 'elp 9ou feel better. *owever= 9ou 0a9 want to use a si0ilar= but 0u!' 0ore effe!tive wa9 for over!o0ing t'e separation. You 'ave to fo!us on anal9?ing and i0proving 9ourself.

8t is i0portant for 9ou to perfor0 t'is anal9sis

after 9ou 'ave grieved for t'e relations'ip brea"( up. T'is s'ould be part of t'e se!ond p'ase of t'e re!over9 pro!essI t'e self i0prove0ent. 8t is eAuall9 i0portant for 9ou to tr9 to be ob>e!tive w'en anal9?ing w'at 9ou 0a9 'ave done wrong and w'at 9ou s'ould i0prove. After all= bla0ing 9our ex for ever9t'ing will not give 9ou t'e desired results.

As" 9ourself 'ow tolerant 9ou were during t'e relations'ip. Did 9ou agree wit' 9our partner ever9 ti0e or did 9ou refuse to put up wit' an9 of t'eir i0perfe!tions# 8n order to 'ave a strong bond wit' so0eone= 9ou need to "eep 9our identit9 and to reserve 9our rig't to 'ave a personal point of view. At t'e sa0e ti0e= 9ou s'ould allow 9our partner to do t'e sa0e. 8f 9ou do not li"e !ertain t'ings about t'e person= 9ou 0a9 suggest !'anging t'e0= but onl9 if 9our partner agrees t'at it would be benefi!ial as well. You s'ould also be prepared to !'ange so0e t'ings.

As" 9ourself w'at priorit9 9ou gave to 9our relations'ip before t'e brea"(up. ;ere 9ou spending a lot of ti0e wit' 9our partner# Did 9ou ta"e t'e0 for granted# Did 9ou fo!us predo0inantl9 on ot'er areas of 9our life su!' as 9our !areer# 8t is diffi!ult to balan!e between t'e different t'ings in 9our life and t'is !an readil9 lead to a relations'ip brea"(up. 8n t'e future= 9ou 0a9 want to tr9 to put a greater priorit9 on a ro0anti! relations'ip if 9ou want to 0a"e it wor".

As" 9ourself w'et'er 9ou 'ave fear of !o00it0ent. You 0a9 not "now t'is but one of t'e 0ost !o00on reasons for a relations'ip brea"(up is !o00it0ent p'obia. 8f 9ou find it diffi!ult to !o00it= 9ou 0a9 want to spend so0e ti0e fo!using on ot'er t'ings t'at are i0portant to 9ou. You 0a9 prefer to devote a greater period to dating= so t'at 9ou !an be full9 read9 to !o00it to t'e rig't person= on!e 9ou find t'e0.

4ow 9ou "now 'ow to i0prove future relations'ips after a relations'ip brea"(up.

*ow to ,a"e Cold Tur"e9 %eparation ;or"

T'ere are two wa9s in w'i!' 9ou !an brea" up wit' 9our ex. :ne of t'e options is to do it is !old tur"e9I t'at is not seeing or !alling 9our partner an90ore. T'e ot'er option is to "eep in tou!' wit' 9our ex to !'e!" on ea!' ot'er and to sta9 friends= w'atever t'is 0a9 0ean. Do 9ou t'in" t'e first relations'ip brea"(up wor"s# Can 9ou a!tuall9 split wit' a partner in t'is wa9# *ow !an 9ou use t'is 0et'od effe!tivel9# /ind t'e answers now.

T'ere is no doubt t'at t'e !old tur"e9 0et'od is 0u!' 0ore effe!tive. You are on 9our own and 9our ex gets to understand t'at t'e9 are on t'eir own as well. You put an end to a relations'ip and now bot' of 9ou !an 0ove on to i0prove 9our lives and to

find t'e rig't life partners.

T'e proble0 is t'at t'e !old tur"e9 relations'ip brea"(up is reall9 'ard= if not i0possible to a!'ieve. T'is is be!ause 9ou !annot stop 'aving feelings for 9our ex all of a sudden. At t'e sa0e ti0e= bot' of 9ou will be 'urt. You 0a9 find it 'ard to ad>ust to t'e new life of a single. T'e logi!al Auestion 'ere is 'ow to 0a"e t'e !old tur"e9 0et'od wor".

You 'ave to be absolutel9 !ertain t'at 9ou do not want to be wit' t'is person an90ore. T'in" about all t'e negative t'ings t'at led to t'e relations'ip brea"(up. Consider all t'e benefits t'at 9ou and 9our ex will get fro0 being out of t'is relations'ip.

Tr9 not to 'ave an9 !onta!t wit' 9our ex at least during t'e re!over9 period. You s'ould not see t'is as avoiding t'e pla!es and people t'at 9ou visited w'en 9ou were toget'er wit' 9our ex. Conta!t 9our single friends and go out wit' t'e0. Tr9 to expand 9our so!ial !ir!le= 9our interests and t'e pla!es 9ou visit. T'is will allow 9ou to get a fres' start wit'out turning ba!".

Do not give in to an9 atte0pts 9our ex 0a"es to !onta!t 9ou and to see 9ou. At one point 9ou 0a9 feel s90pat'9 for 9our ex= espe!iall9 if t'e9 are going t'roug' a great e0otional pain. 8n t'is !ase=

9ou 'ave to re0ind 9ourself of t'e benefits 9our ex will get fro0 t'e relations'ip brea"(up eventuall9. T'e i0portant t'ing is not to "eep on 0eeting and explaining w'9 t'e separation is good for bot' of 9ou= as t'is !an 0a"e t'ings even worse.

)se all of t'ese tips to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up !old tur"e9.

*ow to Treat Co00on /riends

T'ere are all sorts of aspe!ts related to relations'ip brea"(up t'at eventuall9 turn out to be a !ause for !on!ern. :ne of t'e0 is 'ow to treat !o00on friends t'at 9ou 'ave s'ared as a !ouple. You would want to get as 0u!' understanding and support fro0 friends as possible= but 9ou are !ertainl9 worried about t'e fa!t t'at t'e9 0a9 be on t'e side of 9our ex. *ere is so0e advi!e on 'ow to 'andle 0atters so t'at 9ou !an deal wit' t'e separation better.

A!!ept t'e fa!t t'at 9our !o00on friends li"e bot' of 9ou and t'at t'e9 will 0ost li"el9 prefer to be neutral in t'is situation. 8f 9ou need to s'are wit' so0eone and get support= 9ou 0a9 prefer to friends w'o are onl9 9ours. *owever= t'is does not 0ean t'at 9ou s'ould avoid tal"ing to t'ese people. Cuite t'e opposite= 9ou 0a9 want to "eep in tou!' wit' t'e0 and go out wit' t'e0 for a !'at or to

'ave fun.

8f 9ou feel 'ostilit9 and bla0e fro0 !o00on friends after t'e relations'ip brea"(up= 9ou s'ould definitel9 avoid tal"ing to t'e0. 3egrettabl9= 0an9 people fail to understand t'at no 0atter w'o is at fault for t'e separation ( if t'ere is a side to bla0e at all ( bot' ex partners feel upset and 'urt. You s'ould not let su!' people affe!t 9our e0otional state in an9 wa9. @ust avoid t'e0 and stop !o00uni!ating wit' t'e0 at all if 9ou 'ave to. After all= t'e9 0a9 be e0otionall9 affe!ted b9 t'e relations'ip brea"(up too.

You s'ould be !areful if t'ese people offer support for 9ou as well. 8f t'e9 are read9 to provide e0otional support wit'out digging into t'e past and into t'e !auses for t'e split= t'en 9ou !an readil9 a!!ept t'eir 'elp. *owever= if t'e9 tr9 to get details or tr9 to turn 9ou against 9our ex= 9ou s'ould definitel9 not listen to t'e0. /riends'ips are often as !o0plex as relations'ips= so 9ou would not want to get into so0e s!'e0e t'at will eventuall9 lead to 9ou or 9our ex getting 0ore 'urt.

T'e best wa9 relations'ip wanting t'e0 not "now w'o turn to 9our friends wit'

to treat !o00on friends after a brea"(up is to be friendl9 wit'out to ta"e sides. 8f 9ou feel t'at 9ou do of t'ese people to trust= 9ou s'ould relatives and friends w'o are not 9our ex. At t'e sa0e ti0e= 9ou s'ould

tr9 to "eep in tou!' wit' t'ose !o00on friends w'o are not ta"ing sides and tr9ing to get so0et'ing for t'e0selves out of t'e split.

80portant Dos and Don<ts

T'ere are no set rules t'at 9ou 'ave to "eep in order to over!o0e a relations'ip brea"(up. *owever= if 9ou sti!" to so0e expert re!o00endations 9ou will feel a lot better and 9our e0otional wounds will 'eal 0u!' 0ore Aui!"l9. Tr9 to sti!" to t'ese re!o00endations as best as 9ou !an to get t'e best possible end results.

Don<t punis' 9ourself for going t'roug' a relations'ip brea"(up. 8rrespe!tive of w'et'er 9ou or 9our partner initiated t'e split= 9ou s'ould allow 9ourself to feel grief= t'en 0ove onI not torture 9ourself. T'ere is no wa9 9ou need to pa9 for Bso0et'ing wrongB t'at 9ou 'ave done. %eparations are so0et'ing natural= so t'e 0ost nor0al t'ing to do in t'is 0o0ent is to tr9 to feel better and not worse.

Do ever9t'ing 9ou !an to feel even a little bit 'appier. 4o 0atter 'ow 0u!' friends and fa0il9 tr9 to 'elp= 9ou 'ave to find 9our own inner strengt' to get out of bed and go do so0et'ing t'at 9ou reall9 li"e. A lot of people find it ver9 t'erapeuti! to do t'ings t'at t'e9 'ad reall9

en>o9ed doing before= but t'at t'e9 did not do during t'e relations'ip. /or instan!e= 9ou 0a9 go out to a !lub wit' 9our friends.

Don<t tr9 to fix t'ings between 9ou and 9our ex. A relations'ip brea"(up is t'e final step two people !an ta"e. 8f so0et'ing !ould be fixed= 9ou would 'ave done it before'and. @ust do not torture 9ourself about t'e past= but loo" forward. 5eave 9our ex alone so t'at 9ou !an feel better too.

Do 0eet wit' friends and fa0il9 as 0u!' as 9ou !an. 8solation !an 0a"e 9ou feel a lot worse after a relations'ip brea"(up. T'e people w'o love 9ou and !are for 9ou !an 'elp 9ou in a lot of different wa9s. T'e9 !an "eep 9ou !o0pan9 and give 9ou support. T'e9 !an give 9ou 'elpful advi!e on 'ow to go on wit' 9our life. T'e9 !an also organi?e all sorts of fun t'ings for 9ou to en>o9.

Don<t loo" ba!". Do tr9 to 0a"e s0all steps forward. Going over w'at 'appened will !ertainl9 0a"e 9ou feel worse. @ust a!!ept t'e fa!t t'at t'ings li"e t'is 'appen in life. You s'ould not get stu!" in t'e present eit'er= even if 9ou feel 0elan!'ol9 and 9ou li"e t'is 0ind state. Tr9 to 0ove forward b9 0a"ing s0all steps. Get a new dail9 routine= en>o9 new a!tivities and 0eet new people.

4ow 9ou !an re!over effe!tivel9 fro0 a relations'ip brea"(up wit'out falling into !o00on traps.

8s 3unning Awa9 a %olution#

You !an !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up in 0an9 different wa9s. :ne of t'e0 is to >ust leave 9our >ob= town or even t'e !ountr9 for a w'ile. ;ill t'is 'elp# Could t'is be t'e rig't solution for 'ealing a bro"en 'eart# 3ead on to find t'e answers and 'elp 9ou to re!over after a separation.

T'e realit9 is t'at running awa9 is a te0porar9 solution after a relations'ip brea"(up. You will !ertainl9 feel better for a w'ile given t'at 9ou will !'ange 9our environ0ent !o0pletel9. You will not be around t'ings t'at re0ind 9ou of 9our ex and 9our life wit' t'e0. Given all t'is= 9ou will reall9 'ave t'e !'an!e to forget 9our for0er partner and feel better 0ore Aui!"l9.

:n t'e ot'er 'and= 9ou will 'ave to get ba!" to 9our life eventuall9. You !annot 'ide forever. Eventuall9= 9ou will 'ave to go to wor" and 0eet t'e sa0e people. You will 'ave to re(enter 9our !ir!le of friends. You will 'ave to go ba!" to 9our fa0il9. As a result= 9ou 0a9 find it 0ore diffi!ult to !ope wit' t'e relations'ip brea"(up= given t'at ever9t'ing will re0ind 9ou of 9our past life and 9our relations'ip.

;'at is t'e best t'ing to do t'en# 8f going awa9 on

va!ation will 0a"e 9ou feel 0ore relaxed= 9ou s'ould not 'esitate to do it. T'e i0portant t'ing is to use t'is ti0e to t'in" t'ings t'roug' and to !o0e up wit' a plan to 0ove forward. )se 9our ti0e awa9 fro0 'o0e not onl9 as a ti0e for grieving for 9our relations'ip= but as a ti0e to 'eal as well. 8t is i0portant for 9ou to get ba!" to 9our life deter0ined to 0ove on and to get w'at 9ou reall9 want in life.

:ften= people going awa9 after a relations'ip brea"(up get into rebound relations'ips w'ile t'e9 are awa9. %u!' a relations'ip 0a9 literall9 fill in t'e e0otional gap left b9 9our ex= but it will 0ost li"el9 not 'eal 9our bro"en 'eart. T'at is w'9 9ou s'ould avoid t'is option. As 'ig'lig'ted earlier= t'is s'ould be a ti0e for 9ou onl9. You 'ave to de!ide 'ow to ta"e !ontrol of 9our life and w'at to do fro0 now on.

4ow 9ou "now 'ow to re!over fro0 a relations'ip brea"(up b9 going awa9 to ret'in" 9our life instead of running awa9 fro0 9our proble0s. )se t'is advi!e to get over 9our ex and to get ba!" on 9our feet.

5earn fro0 Your ,ista"es

%o0e people sa9 t'at in order to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up is it better to loo" forward and never loo" ba!" at a past relations'ip.

*owever= t'is is reall9 'ard= if not i0possible. 8nstead of >ust tr9ing to forget about w'at 'as 'appened= 9ou s'ould anal9?e 9our relations'ip and learn fro0 9our 0ista"es. T'is is a reall9 effe!tive wa9 in w'i!' to over!o0e t'e negative e0otions and do better next ti0e around.

T'e first Auestion 9ou need to as" 9ourself in order to !ope wit' 9our relations'ip brea"(up is w'at led to t'e split. @ust tr9 to be i0partial w'en answering t'is Auestion and avoid putting t'e bla0e on eit'er 9ourself or 9our partner. You 'ave to understand t'at we are all different and no 0atter 'ow 0u!' two people love ea!' ot'er t'e9 0a9 not want t'e sa0e t'ings in life. T'e idea 'ere is to find out 'ow flexible 9ou bot' were w'en 9ou were toget'er. Per'aps 9ou 0a9 want to be 0ore flexible in 9our next relations'ip or ta"e a fir0er stand.

As" 9ourself w'et'er 9ou and 9our partner trul9 a!!epted ea!' ot'er wit' 9our good and bad sides. T'is !an 'elp 9ou !ope wit' 9our relations'ip brea"(up 0ore easil9= as 9ou reali?e 'ow !o0patible 9ou two were. 8f 9ou t'in" t'at 9ou 'ave not been tolerant enoug' wit' 9our partner= 9ou 0a9 !onsider be!o0ing 0ore tolerant to people in general. 8n t'is wa9= 9ou will 'ave 'ig'er !'an!es of starting a 0ore fruitful new relations'ip. 8f 9ou believe 9ou were wa9 too tolerant= 9ou 0a9 want to set 'ig'er standards wit' an9 new partner and to people in 9our so!ial !ir!le as a w'ole. T'ere is not'ing wrong wit' loo"ing to be in t'e !o0pan9 of people

w'o respe!t 9ou and appre!iate 9ou for w'o 9ou are.

Anal9?e 'ow 0u!' !ontrol 9ou 'ave over t'e negative e0otions 9ou experien!e in general and w'en 9ou are in a relations'ip. T'is !an reall9 'elp 9ou over!o0e t'e relations'ip brea"(up and re!over full9 to start a new life. T'e realit9 is t'at negative t'oug'ts and feelings affe!t 9our a!tions negativel9. 8n turn= people around 9ou are affe!ted negativel9 as well. As a result= t'e9 !an treat 9ou badl9 too as a rea!tion to 9our be'avior= even if t'e9 do not want to a!t t'is wa9. You 'ave to do 9our best to avoid entering t'is vi!ious !ir!le. 3el9 on s'aring and as" for support w'en 9ou need it.

)se all of t'ese tips to anal9?e 9our 0ista"es and learn fro0 t'e0 in order to !ope wit' 9our relations'ip brea"(up.

,a"e %ure You %ta9 *ealt'9

Putting an end to a relations'ip is !ertainl9 one of t'e 'ardest t'ings in life to do. *owever= 9ou !an !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up b9 ta"ing good !are of 9ourself. 7eeping 9our p'9si!al and ps9!'ologi!al 'ealt' inta!t is essential for over!o0ing t'e split and starting a new= better life.

Adopt effe!tive stress 0anage0ent te!'niAues. Ti0e 0anage0ent is an effe!tive 0et'od for redu!ing t'e stress in 9our life. Devising a wee"l9 and dail9 s!'edule will 'elp 9ou sta9 on tra!" and go on wit' 9our nor0al life. %till= it is a good idea to 0a"e 9our dail9 s!'edule less 'e!ti! and to provide suffi!ient ti0e for relaxation.

You s'ould set up a dail9 routine for 9ourself t'at 9ou need to follow stri!tl9 as well. Going to bed and getting up at !ertain ti0es ever9 da9 will !ertainl9 'elp 9ou get a better sleep. *aving t'ree 0eals a da9 at s!'eduled ti0es will allow 9ou to get enoug' nutrients to go t'roug' t'e da9.

Devote a few 'ours to relaxation ever9 da9 to !ope wit' t'e stress after a relations'ip brea"(up. 8t is best for t'e relaxation to be a!tive. asi!all9= instead of sitting on t'e !ou!' and wat!'ing TV= 9ou s'ould >oin an interest !lub= find a 'obb9 or ta"e !lasses in so0et'ing t'at 9ou li"e. You 0a9 want to pra!ti!e 0editation and 9oga. ot' of t'ese are great 0ind(bod9 te!'niAues for relaxation.

You s'ould exer!ise a!tivel9 in order to sta9 fit and to feel less stressed out. Exer!ise sti0ulates t'e nor0al fun!tioning of all organs and s9ste0s in t'e bod9= so it will give 9ou 0ore energ9 and i0prove 9our 0ood to 'elp 9ou over!o0e wit' 9our relations'ip brea"(up. You !an !'oose to do an9 t9pe of exer!ise. @ust 0a"e sure 9ou wor" out for

an 'our at least two ti0es a wee".

Adopt a 'ealt'9 balan!ed diet. 8t will 'ave a si0ilar effe!t on 9our 0ind and bod9 0u!' li"e exer!ise. 8t 'as been proven t'at foods and t'e nutrients t'e9 !ontain affe!t our 0oods as well as our overall well being. 8n general= t'e well("nown 'ealt' foods= su!' as w'ole(grains= vegetables= fruits= nuts and seeds= lean poultr9 and fis' s'ould be abundantl9 present in 9our diet. Avoid foods !ontaining refined sugar and greas9 foods= espe!iall9 fried ones. /orget about >un" food sna!"s as well. Tr9 to redu!e t'e a0ount of !affeine 9ou ta"e.

4ow 9ou "now 'ow to adopt a 'ealt'9 lifest9le to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. )se all of t'ese tips to feel better and get a new start in life.

,a"ing Plans to ,ove /orward

8t is 'ard to a!!ept t'e fa!t t'at 9our partner is no longer part of 9our life. *owever= t'is does not 0ean t'at 9ou s'ould live onl9 wit' t'e 'app9 0e0ories fro0 t'e past. T'e best wa9 to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up is to 0a"e a plan to 0ove forward. )se t'e following steps to prepare t'e rig't plan for 9ou and to 0ove forward to a better and 0ore fulfilling life.

/ind new interests and 'obbies. ,eet new people. You s'ould do t'ese t'ings as part of t'e preli0inar9 stage of t'e plan. You !annot 0ove forward unless 9ou stop fo!using on 9our relations'ip brea"(up and on 9our past wit' 9our ex partner. asi!all9= t'is is a transition period during w'i!' 9ou need to get a feel of 'ow great life !an be wit'out 9our ex.

%et new priorities for 9ourself. T'is is t'e first stage of t'e plan for 0oving forward. You 'ave to figure out w'at 9ou want fro0 9our life= wit'out 9our ex in t'e pi!ture. Do 9ou want to advan!e in 9our !areer# Do 9ou want to !'ange 9our >obI t'e pla!e 9ou live in= 9our so!ial !ir!le# Do 9ou want to find a new life partner# You 0a9 want all t'ese t'ings= but 9ou 'ave to set priorities to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up 0ore effe!tivel9. 5ist t'e t'ings 9ou want in a priorit9 list wit' t'e 0ost i0portant ones being at t'e top.

%et 9our future goals based on t'e priorities t'at 9ou 'ave set for 9ourself. *aving so0et'ing to ai0 for in t'e future will !ertainl9 'elp 9ou !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up 0ore Aui!"l9 and effe!tivel9. T'ere are two i0portant t'ings t'at 9ou s'ould re0e0ber w'en setting goals. T'e9 s'ould be pre!ise. Define exa!tl9 w'at 9ou want to get. %et a ti0e fra0e for a!!o0plis'ing 9our goals. /or instan!e= 9ou 0a9 set a goal to get pro0oted in six 0ont's ti0e.

Devise step b9 step plans for a!!o0plis'ing ea!' one of 9our goals. De!ide w'at 9ou need to do to a!!o0plis' t'ese life goals. Put t'e different a!tions FstepsG toget'er in one !o'erent plan. %et a ti0e fra0e for t'e !o0pletion of ea!' one of t'ese steps. 8f ne!essar9= set s0aller goals t'at 9ou need to a!!o0plis' along t'e wa9 towards 9our big goals.

4ow 9ou "now 'ow to set a plan to 0ove forward after a relations'ip brea"(up. T'e instru!tions 0a9 see0 a little stri!t= but 'aving self(dis!ipline is essential for su!!ess.

,ista"es to Avoid after

rea"ing )p

Ending a relations'ip wit' so0eone 9ou love or 'ave loved a lot is a ver9 stressful experien!e. *owever= t'is does not 0ean t'at 9ou s'ould not find wa9s to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. T'ere are 0an9 different wa9s in w'i!' 9ou !an do t'is. :ne of t'e0 is to avoid 0a"ing 0ista"es t'at !an 'urt 9ou even 0ore and 0a"e 9ou feel worse t'an 9ou alread9 feel.

la0ing 9ourself for t'e brea"(up is per'aps t'e 0ain 0ista"e to avoid if 9ou want to re!over Aui!"l9. 8n general= t'e two partners are eAuall9 at fault for t'e end of t'e relations'ip. 8n 0ost

!ases= t'ere is no one to bla0e= sin!e bot' partners feel t'at t'ings are not going well between t'e0 and t'ere is no wa9 in w'i!' t'e relations'ip !an be saved. /or all t'ese reasons= 9ou s'ould not feel guilt about w'at 'as 'appened. @ust a!!ept t'at even t'oug' t'e !urrent situation 0a9 be diffi!ult= it is better for bot' of 9ou.

5etting 9our e0otions !ontrol 9our life is anot'er 0a>or 0ista"e to avoid in order to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. 8t is nor0al for 9ou to grieve and to feel sad. 8f 9ou allow 9ourself to experien!e 9our e0otions full9 t'e9 s'ould go awa9 sooner. *owever= t'is s'ould not stop 9ou fro0 going on wit' 9our dail9 life. ,a"e 9our s!'edule less 'e!ti!= but "eep going. T'is will 'elp 9ou avoid fo!using on negative e0otions. T'e sa0e is appli!able to anxiet9. 8f 9ou feel anxious about t'e future= >ust ta"e a!tion to prevent bad t'ings fro0 'appening.

Avoiding ot'er people is anot'er serious 0ista"e t'at 9ou s'ould not 0a"e. A lot of people feel as'a0ed after going t'roug' a relations'ip brea"(up due to religious or so!ial reasons. 8n turn= t'e9 prefer not to tal" to an9one= even to t'eir fa0il9 and friends. You 'ave to do exa!tl9 t'e opposite. You 'ave to s'are 9our pain wit' t'e people w'o love 9ou= so t'at 9ou !an get t'e understanding and support t'at 9ou need. %i0ilarl9= tr9 to regain 9our self(!onfiden!e and tr9 0a"ing new friends. T'is !an be a great wa9 to 'eal 9our e0otional wounds.

4ow 9ou "now 'ow to avoid t'e 0ain 0ista"es t'at will prevent 9ou fro0 !oping wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. )se all of t'e above tips to get ba!" on 9our feet and experien!e t'e >o9s of life again. 3e0e0ber t'at 9ou !an 'ave total !ontrol of 9our life and t'at is up to 9ou to 0a"e 9ourself feel better.

:pening )p to :t'er People

You were deepl9 'urt and 0a9be 9ou still feel t'at wa9 after a relations'ip brea"(up. 8t is natural for 9ou to feel t'at 9ou 0a9 never love and be loved again. 8t is nor0al to be afraid to open up to new people. /ollow t'ese tips to over!o0e t'is fear and to give 9our love life a fres' new start.

e !onfident in w'o 9ou are and "eep in 0ind t'at 9ou are a wonderful person w'o deserves to be loved and will be loved. 8t is i0portant for 9ou to adopt t'is "ind of positive 0indset. You 'ave to understand t'at despite t'e failure of 9our last relations'ip= 9ou are still a great person wit' a set of a0a?ing Aualities. You 'ave to a!!ept t'e fa!t t'at t'ings between 9ou and 9our ex did not wor" be!ause 9ou were not for one anot'er and be!ause bot' of 9ou 0ade so0e 0ista"es t'at 9ou will not repeat in t'e future.

e e0otionall9 read9 to open up to ot'er people after t'e relations'ip brea"(up. 8f 9ou feel it is too earl9 to go on dates= 9ou s'ould not follow blindl9 t'e advi!e of 9our friends and fa0il9. 8f 9ou feel t'at 9ou 0ust 'ave a partner at all !osts= 9ou 0a9 want to spend 0ore ti0e as a single in order to avoid ending up toget'er wit' a partner t'at 9ou do not love and t'at does not love 9ou.

Ta"e t'ings slowl9 and be prepared to feel a bit un!o0fortable about dating. 4o 0atter 'ow 0u!' ti0e 'as passed after t'e relations'ip brea"(up= 9ou !an expe!t to be a little bit inti0idated b9 ot'er people and dating. You !an expe!t to be nervous about w'at 9ou will sa9 and do. 8n turn= 9ou 0a9 not 0a"e t'e perfe!t i0pression. You 'ave to be prepared for 0a"ing s0all 0ista"es. T'e i0portant t'ing is not to fo!us on t'ese= but to a!!ept t'at t'ese t'ings are part of t'e 'ealing pro!ess.

Do not be pre>udi!ed about ot'er people= even t'oug' 9ou 'ave been t'roug' a relations'ip brea"( up. Your ex was not perfe!t and ended up 'urting 9ou. T'is does not 0ean t'at a person 9ou are dating will be t'e sa0e andHor do t'e sa0e t'ings. 8n general= 9ou s'ould not rel9 on !li!'es about people. Ever9 person is different and s'ould be seen as su!'. Tr9 not to 0a"e !o0parisons. Tr9 to find t'e best in people. 8f t'is 'appens 9ou will alwa9s find so0eone w'o0 9ou li"e and w'o li"es 9ou too.

%'ould You Co00uni!ate wit' Your Ex#

You are sitting alone at 'o0e and 9ou see so0et'ing on TV t'at 9our ex will find fun. You wis' 9ou !ould s'are t'is wit' t'e0. %'ould 9ou !all t'e0# 8n 0o0ents li"e t'ese= 9ou need to rel9 on i0partial advi!e on 'ow to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. 3ead on to find out 'ow to !o00uni!ate wit' 9our ex and w'9 9ou s'ould do t'is in order to re!over 0ore Aui!"l9 after t'e split.

Tr9 to avoid tal"ing to 9our ex. Do not !all or see" a !'an!e to 0eet t'e0. 8f 9ou 'ave to !o00uni!ate for so0e reason= 9ou s'ould tr9 to 0a"e it as for0al as possible. 4ot following t'ese si0ple rules !an onl9 'urt 9ou even 0ore and 0a"e it 0ore diffi!ult for 9ou to !ope wit' t'e relations'ip brea"(up.

You are !ertainl9 t'in"ing t'at t'is not !onta!ting and tal"ing to 9our ex is i0possible to a!'ieve be!ause 9ou feel strong urges to do it. *owever= t'e realit9 is t'at 9ou !an be 0u!' stronger t'an 9ou t'in". 8t is all about t'e viewpoint 9ou adopt and 'ow well 9ou !ontrol 9our e0otions.

You are in a situation in w'i!' 9ou want to !all 9our or ex or t'e9 !all 9ou and suggest a 0eeting. As" 9ourself w'9 9ou need to tal" to 9our partner. You 'ave alread9 bro"en up and it is !lear t'at

bot' of 9ou !annot be 'app9 in t'is relations'ip. At t'e 0o0ent 9ou are feeling down and so is 9our ex. Can t'is reall9 fix t'ings between 9ou# T'e answer is BnoB. 8f 9ou !ould not fix t'ings w'ile 9ou were toget'er= t'en would 9ou be able to fix t'ings now#

3ig't after a relations'ip brea"(up= 9ou are full of negative e0otions w'i!' !an easil9 !o0e to t'e surfa!e if 9ou tal" to 9our ex. T'is will 0a"e 9ou feel even worse. T'at is w'9 9ou s'ould turn to 9our friends and relatives= rat'er t'an 9our ex. @oin a group of single friends.

,an9 people de!ide to !all t'eir ex w'en t'e9 feel t'e9 'ave a !'an!e to get toget'er and fix t'ings to start a new and better relations'ip. 3egrettabl9= t'is is 'ig'l9 unli"el9 to 'appen given t'e bitterness after t'e split. T'at is w'9 9ou s'ould let bot' of 9ou re!over and anal9?e 9our relations'ip.

Give 9ourself so0e ti0e to t'in" about t'e t'ings 9ou need and want. @ust do not sit at 'o0e waiting to get ba!" toget'er wit' 9our ex partner. %tart a new life and wit' ti0e= 9ou will find out w'et'er 9our ex 0a9 'ave a pla!e in it.

%'ould You Consider Getting

a!" wit' Your Ex#

You 'ave >ust split up wit' 9our partner. 8t is nor0al for 9ou to be !onfused and to loo" for t'e best wa9 to !ope wit' t'e relations'ip brea"(up. 8t is also nor0al for 9ou to feel down about 9our future wit'out 9our partner. Does t'is 0ean 9ou s'ould tr9 to get ba!" toget'er wit' t'e0# 8s t'is a viable option# )se t'e following advi!e to answer su!' Auestions and !ope wit' su!' issues.

T'e first t'ing 9ou need to do is to a!!ept t'e split as final. 8t does not 0atter w'at 'as 'appened. 8t does not 0atter w'o initiated t'e relations'ip brea"(up. You are no longer wit' 9our ex partner. You are single and free to do w'atever 9ou want wit' 9our life.

8t 0a9 be 'ard for 9ou to a!!ept t'ese fa!ts and espe!iall9 to 0odif9 9our life to t'e new situation. T'at is w'9 9ou s'ould establis' so0e i0portant rules. 4ot !onta!ting 9our ex s'ould be t'e first and 0ost i0portant rule t'at 9ou s'ould "eep. You 'ave to get used to t'e fa!t t'at 9our partner is no longer around 9ou and t'at t'e9 are not t'e !losest person to 9ou. 8f 9ou need advi!e and support= 9ou s'ould resort to 9our friends and relatives.

8n general= it is a good idea for 9ou to establis' a dail9 routine t'at !orresponds to 9our life as a single. ,a"e 0ore ti0e for en>o9ing 9our favorite 'obb9 and for going out wit' friends. Consider

dating as an option= at a later state of t'e re!over9 pro!ess after t'e relations'ip brea"(up.

asi!all9= t'e idea is to give 9ourself a brea" fro0 9our ex tr9ing to t'in" as little about t'e0 as possible. 8n t'is wa9= 9ou will be able to re!over fro0 t'e negative e0otions t'at 9ou experien!e. 8n turn= 9ou will 'ave to t'e opportunit9 to go over t'e t'ings t'at 'appened and draw i0partial !on!lusions. T'is will allow 9ou to de!ide w'et'er 9ou 0a9 !onsider getting ba!" wit' 9our ex as an option.

Anal9?e 9our relations'ip wit' 9our ex ob>e!tivel9. T'is is t'e best t'ing 9ou !an do to find out w'at went wrong and w'et'er it 0a9 be fixed. @ust do not t'in" about t'e t'ings 9ou !ould 'ave done differentl9. Tr9 to find out w'et'er t'e9 are t'e rig't person for 9ou. /igure out w'et'er 9ou are able and willing to 0a"e so0e !'anges in t'e future.

/inall9= if 9ou !onsider getting ba!" wit' 9our ex after t'e relations'ip brea"(up 0a"e sure t'e9 are read9 and willing to !'ange too.

%'ould You %ta9 /riends wit' Your Ex#

A relations'ip brea"(up is usuall9 a ver9 !o0plex

and !onfusing situation. T'e !'ange is often abrupt and 'ard to go t'roug' even if 9ou 'ave seen it !o0ing for so0e ti0e. T'ere are a lot of pat's 9ou !an ta"e in su!' a situation. 8s sta9ing friends wit' 9our ex one of t'e0# 8s t'is a good idea# ;ill t'is 0a"e 9ou feel better# 3ead on to find out t'e answers.

T'e realit9 is t'at 9ou and 9our ex !annot turn fro0 partners to friends overnig't. Even if a relations'ip brea"(up was a0i!able and 9ou de!ided to Bsta9 friendsB= t'is does not 0ean t'at t'ings will be t'e sa0e as before onl9 wit'out t'e inti0a!9. T'is is be!ause 9ou will !ertainl9 experien!e negative e0otions after t'e split.

8n addition= 9ou will 'ave to a!!ept t'e fa!t t'at 9our ex partner will not be part of 9our life in t'e sa0e wa9 as before. You will not 0eet t'at often. You will not s'are and go out toget'er t'at 0u!'. %ooner or later= 9ou will 'ave to a!!ept t'e fa!t t'at 9our ex will be wit' so0eone else. 8f 9ou sta9 friends 9ou 'ave to be supportive and understanding= but 9ou will 0ost li"el9 not feel t'at wa9.

@ust as" 9ourself w'at reasons 9ou 'ave to sta9 friends wit' 9our ex after t'e relations'ip brea"( up. 4ow 9ou "now w'at 9ou !an expe!t to get fro0 doing t'is. 8n general= 9ou !an expe!t to sta9 apart= even if 9ou treat ea!' ot'er a0i!abl9. T'is is a!!eptable if 9ou are read9 to 0ove on. *owever=

t'is is t'e worst step 9ou !an ta"e if 9ou still 'ave an9 'opes of getting ba!" toget'er wit' 9our ex partner.

T'e best t'ing 9ou !an do after t'e relations'ip brea"(up is to grieve and to sta9 as far awa9 fro0 9our ex partner as possible. Ter0inate 9our !onta!t wit' t'e0 and fo!us on 0oving forward and 0a"ing 9our life better for 9ourself. Do t'e t'ings t'at 9ou want and 0eet new people. Devote 0ore ti0e to relaxation and 'aving fun.

Anal9?e 9our relations'ip i0partiall9 after 9ou over!o0e t'e relations'ip brea"(up and start feeling !o0fortable in 9our new situation. :nl9 t'en !an 9ou de!ide w'et'er 9ou want to 'ave 9our ex in 9our life as a friend. 8f 9ou find out 9ou still 'ave strong feelings for t'e0 and t'at 9ou are willing and able to get ba!" toget'er= 9ou s'ould not tr9 to get t'e0 ba!" b9 pretending to be t'eir friend. e as open as possible.

%'ould You Ta"e Advi!e fro0 /riends#

8t is probabl9 easier to give t'an to ta"e relations'ip brea"(up advi!e. T'at is w'9 9ou s'ould be parti!ularl9 !areful about w'at 9our friends sa9 and advise 9ou to do. %u!' situations are !o0plex for 9ou as well as for t'e0. You 'ave to find t'e best wa9 to 0a"e t'e 0ost out of 9our

relations'ips wit' 9our friends wit'out getting even 0ore 'urt and upset in t'e end.

Tr9 to s'are 9our deepest se!rets onl9 wit' reall9 !lose friends w'o reall9 love 9ou and !are for 9ou. 8f 9ou are not read9 to ta"e t'eir relations'ip brea"(up advi!e= >ust as" t'e0 to listen to 9ou and to be s90pat'eti! for t'e ti0e being. You s'ould not 'esitate to open up 9our 'eart and experien!e all e0otions t'at 9ou 'ave inside 9ou. Cr9ing is not s'a0eful even for 0en. %i0ilarl9= getting 9our anger out in a 0anner t'at is safe for 9ou and for ot'ers is not a sign of a 0ental illness.

A!!ept t'e fa!t t'at t'e relations'ip brea"(up advi!e t'at 9ou get fro0 9our friends 0a9 not be exa!tl9 w'at 9ou want to 'ear. 8n su!' !ases= tr9 to re0e0ber t'at t'e9 want onl9 t'e best for 9ou and t'at getting t'e best in t'e future 0a9 reAuire going t'roug' so0e pain in t'e present. T'e 0ost i0portant t'ing is not to get angr9 and upset wit' 9our friends for giving 9ou su!' advi!e. T'is 0a9 0a"e 9ou brea" ot'er relations'ips and feel even worse.

Do not blindl9 follow t'e advi!e 9our friends give 9ou. T'is point is si0ilar to t'e previous one= even t'oug' t'e a!tion is exa!tl9 t'e opposite. You s'ould not refuse to a!!ept ever9 tip give to 9ou. %i0ilarl9= 9ou s'ould not do ever9t'ing t'at ot'ers tell 9ou to do. After all= despite t'eir best intentions 9our friends 0a9 give 9ou t'e wrong

relations'ip brea"(up advi!e and 0a"e t'ings worse. 8n addition= 9ou "now t'e situation and 9our ex better t'an ever9one else= so 9ou s'ould definitel9 not base 9our e0otions and future a!tions on generali?ed state0ents t'at denigrate t'e sexes.

T'e best t'ing 9ou !an do is to appre!iate t'e 'elp= support and advi!e 9our friends give 9ou= but to rel9 on 9our personal >udg0ent and self( "nowledge to !ope wit' t'e relations'ip brea"(up and get 9our life ba!" to nor0al. 3e0e0ber t'at it is all about 9ou and 9our life. T'e 0ore !ontrol 9ou 'ave over 9our e0otions and a!tions t'e better.

%tarting Your 4ew 5ife as a %ingle

C'anging 9our relations'ip status to single is not an eas9 tas"= even t'oug' a separation !an be finali?ed in 0ere se!onds. You 'ave to fa!e realit9 after a relations'ip brea"(up no 0atter w'et'er 9ou li"e it or not. )se t'e following advi!e to go on wit' 9our life and be even 'appier t'an before.

A!!ept t'at 9ou are single now and t'at t'ere is not'ing wrong wit' t'is. 8t is natural for 9ou to feel alone and desperate after a relations'ip brea"(up. After all= 9our future plans wit' 9our ex 'ave been ruined. *owever= t'is does not 0ean t'at being single is li"e being plagued.

T'ere is not'ing s'a0eful about being on 9our own. Cuite t'e opposite= t'is s'ows t'at 9ou are a strong and independent person. %i0ilarl9= t'e fa!t t'at 9ou are a single does not 0ean t'at 9ou s'ould t'in" less of 9ourself. T'ings did not end up well wit' 9our ex= but 9ou are still a person w'o deserves to love and be loved. 4ow 9ou 'ave a great opportunit9 to find so0eone w'o will appre!iate 9ou and love 9ou for w'o 9ou trul9 are.

T'in" of all t'e benefits of being single. You 0a9 not see t'ese after a relations'ip brea"(up= so 9ou !ertainl9 need a re0inder. eing single 0eans 9ou do not 'ave to put up wit' w'at 9our partner sa9s and does. 8t 0eans 9ou do not 'ave to worr9 about balan!ing 9our relations'ip. 8t 0eans 9ou are free to do ever9t'ing t'at 9ou 'ave alwa9s wanted to do= but 9our ex 'as stopped 9ou.

@oin a group of single friends. You would not want to be around 'app9 !ouples after a relations'ip brea"(up. You would want to be wit' people w'o are in exa!tl9 t'e sa0e situation as 9ours and feel !o0fortable about it.

Do w'at singles do. /ind a 'obb9 t'at 9ou reall9 en>o9 doing. Go out and 'ave fun wit'out worr9ing t'at 9ou 'ave to be !areful about 9our partner<s feelings. Expand 9our !ultural 'ori?ons. Expand 9our so!ial !ir!le b9 0eeting new people. You s'ould do all t'e fun t'ings t'at 9ou want to do.

T'ere is no one to set an9 li0its for 9ou.

%tart dating after re!overing full9 fro0 t'e relations'ip brea"(up. En>o9ing 9our life as a single is reall9 i0portant. An i0portant aspe!t of t'is life is dating. Dates !an be a lot of fun if 9ou are !onfident and open up to ot'er people.

T'e E0otional %tages of a

rea" )p

A!!ording to ps9!'ologists= t'ere are five e0otional stages of relations'ip brea"(up. You will 0ost li"el9 go t'roug' all of t'e0= even if it is not in t'e order t'at ps9!'ologists des!ribe. You 'ave to find out w'at t'ese stages are and 'ow to go t'roug' ea!' one of t'e0. 8n t'is wa9= 9our re!over9 will be Aui!"er and 0u!' less painful.

Denial is t'e first e0otional relations'ip brea"(up stage. You refuse to believe ever9t'ing is over. T'e best wa9 to !ope wit' t'is stage is tr9 not to a!t on 9our e0otions. Do 9our best to avoid see"ing !onta!t wit' 9our ex. At t'e sa0e ti0e 9ou s'ould tr9 to s'are 'ow 9ou feel wit' a loved one so t'at 9ou !an ta"e at least so0e of t'e burden awa9.

%'o!" is t'e next p'ase of t'e pro!ess. All of a sudden 9ou are in a !o0pletel9 different situation. You 0a9 feel strong pain and all sorts of negative

e0otions. You 0a9 even feel in!apable of doing an9t'ing. You do not "now w'at to do and w'ere to go. At t'is point= 9ou 0a9 want to give in to 9our e0otions so t'at 9ou experien!e t'e0 full9. T'is will 0a"e 9ou feel better eventuall9.

Confusion is w'at will o!!ur next after t'e relations'ip brea"(up. You start as"ing 9ourself w'at went wrong= but 9ou !annot find t'e answer. You "eep going over t'e relations'ip and t'e separation over and over again. T'e best t'ing to do 'ere is to !o0e up wit' so0e valid answers wit'out putting t'e bla0e on 9our or 9our ex. @ust tr9 to learn fro0 9our 0ista"es.

argaining is t'e next p'ase of t'e e0otional relations'ip brea"(up. You are !onstantl9 !o0ing up wit' different t'ings 9ou are read9 and willing to do >ust to get ba!" toget'er wit' 9our ex partner. At t'e sa0e ti0e 9ou reali?e t'at 9ou !annot devise an effe!tive 0et'od in w'i!' 9ou !an 0a"e t'e ot'er person do w'at 9ou want. At t'is point= it is better to !'annel 9our 0otivation to !'ange towards i0proving 9our future life and towards self i0prove0ent.

5etting go of t'e old relations'ip is t'e final stage of t'e pro!ess. You reali?e t'at t'e relations'ip brea"(up is real and t'at even if 9ou sta9 in tou!' wit' 9our ex t'ings will never be t'e sa0e again. 4ow 9ou are trul9 liberated and 9ou !an wor" towards getting a fres' start. You s'ould not

'esitate to 0a"e plans for 0oving forward and for a better feature.

T'e 3ebound 3elations'ip

T'ere are different wa9s in w'i!' 9ou !an !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. :ne of t'e wa9s is to get into a rebound relations'ip. A lot of people resort to t'is option wit'out t'in"ing w'et'er it !an a!tuall9 'elp t'e0 and 'ow. You s'ould definitel9 learn 0ore about t'is option and t'e different personal and so!ial aspe!ts related to it= so t'at 9ou !an de!ide w'et'er it is rig't for 9ou or not.

People usuall9 enter a rebound relations'ip rig't after or soon after t'e brea"(up. T'e ter0 rebound is used to explain t'e fa!t t'at t'e person wants to get ba!" into a state in w'i!' t'e9 feel !o0fortable b9 repla!ing t'eir partner wit' so0eone else. )suall9= t'e new partner is so0eone w'o 'as strong feelings for t'e person and s'ows understanding of t'eir grief.

A benefit 9ou !an expe!t to get is t'at 9ou will re!over fro0 t'e relations'ip brea"(up 0ore Aui!"l9. *owever= exa!tl9 t'e opposite 0a9 'appen. You 0a9 start feeling even greater regret for losing 9our previous partner. asi!all9= 9our new partner 0a9 re0ind 9ou of all t'e wonderful 0o0ents t'at 9ou 'ave 'ad wit' 9our ex and t'is 0a9 0a"e

t'e pain worse.

Anot'er proble0 wit' t'is option for re!over9 is t'at 9ou 0a9 end up 0a"ing a long(ter0 !o00it0ent to so0eone w'o0 9ou do not trul9 love. T'is !an be a serious proble0 in t'e future. You 0a9 end up wit' a relations'ip t'at 9ou do not want to be in and end up splitting up again. T'is is so0et'ing t'at 9ou s'ould prote!t 9ourself fro0.

T'e alternative s!enario is eAuall9 undesirable. :n!e 9ou re!over fro0 t'e relations'ip brea"(up w'i!' will 'appen sooner or later= 9ou 0a9 feel li"e brea"ing up wit' 9our new partner so t'at 9ou !an go on wit' 9our life. 80agine 'ow 'urt and 0iserable t'is person will be. T'ere is no wa9 in w'i!' 9ou !an !o0e out of t'e situation wit' a !lear !ons!ien!e. You will 'ave to go t'roug' anot'er split and 9ou 0a9 even get 'arassed b9 9our rebound partner.

:verall= it !an be safel9 said t'at rebound relations'ips do not offer t'e re!over9 solution 9ou are loo"ing for. T'ere are a lot of 0u!' better options for !oping wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. You !an readil9 rel9 on getting 'elp= support and advi!e fro0 9our friends and relatives. You !an also tr9 to use t'is !'ange in 9our life to 0a"e so0e i0prove0ents.

T'e 3elations'ip

rea"()p

udd9

You 'ave probabl9 'eard of t'e expression birds of feat'er flo!" toget'er. You !an do t'is in !ase of a relations'ip brea"(up to re!over and get to feel better. %i0pl9 put= 9ou !an find a relations'ip brea"(up budd9I a person w'o is in t'e sa0e situation as 9ou are. T'e idea 'ere is t'at 9ou will understand ea!' ot'er and give one anot'er t'e support 9ou need. 5earn 0ore about t'is option and 'ow to use it effe!tivel9 to feel better and get 9our life ba!" to nor0al.

You 'ave to understand w'at a relations'ip brea"(up budd9 !an do for 9ou and w'at t'e9 !annot. As 'ig'lig'ted earlier= 9ou !an get support and understanding. %till= 9ou !annot expe!t to 'ave been t'roug' exa!tl9 t'e sa0e t'ing as t'e ot'er person. T'at is w'9 9ou s'ould not auto0ati!all9 assu0e t'at t'e9 will understand ea!' and ever9 e0otion t'at 9ou experien!e. %i0ilarl9= 9ou !an get so0e advi!e fro0 t'is person= but 9ou s'ould alwa9s 0a"e t'e final !'oi!e b9 9ourself.

8n general= 9ou s'ould not expe!t 9our friend to be t'ere for 9ou 2&H.. asi!all9= t'is s'ould be a person w'o is read9 to offer 'elp and support ever9 ti0e 9ou need t'e0. %i0ilarl9= 9ou s'ould be prepared to do t'e sa0e for t'e0 too.

8t is i0portant for 9ou and 9our relations'ip

brea"(up budd9 to be on t'e sa0e wavelengt'. 8f 9ou prefer to sit at 'o0e and tal" about 9our feelings and t'e ot'er person prefers to fo!us on going out= 'aving fun and drin"ing t'e nig't awa9= 9ou 0a9 not be t'e rig't people to support and understand ea!' ot'er. You do not 'ave to do w'at 9our friend does to feel better if 9ou believe t'is is not t'e rig't B!ureB for 9ou.

%o0e people tend to go wa9 over t'e top to feel better and resort to al!o'ol or give in to t'eir 'atred. You s'ould definitel9 avoid following t'eir exa0ple= even if t'e9 tell 9ou t'is is t'e best wa9 to get better. T'e idea 'ere is to prote!t 9ourself fro0 a relations'ip brea"(up budd9 t'at does not do 9ou an9 good. You 0a9 feel t'at 9ou will never do so0et'ing stupid= but w'en 9ou are 'urt and !onfused= 9ou s'ould be extra !areful about 9our a!tions.

8n !on!lusion= find a relations'ip brea"(up budd9 t'at !an understand 9ou= support 9ou and 'elp 9ou. ut do not expe!t t'e0 to 'old 9our 'and all t'e ti0e. e !areful not to get into 0ore trouble >ust for t'e sa"e of "eeping a relations'ip wit' 9our new friend.

T'ree ;a9s to Get

a!" to 4or0al

8t is 'ard to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up.

T'at is w'9 it is best to let 9ourself grieve for a w'ile. 8f 9ou are feeling down= >ust let go of 9our e0otions and experien!e t'e0 full9. After t'is= 9ou will feel a lot better. T'e next step is to a!tuall9 ta"e a!tion and 0a"e positive !'anges in 9our life. )se all of t'e following t'ree 0et'ods to get ba!" on tra!" and start en>o9ing life again.

/ind a 'obb9 t'at 9ou en>o9 doing. ;'en 9ou are o!!upied wit' so0et'ing t'at is interesting to 9ou and eli!its positive e0otions= 9ou will !ertainl9 feel a lot 0ore satisfied and a lot better. 8n t'is wa9= 9ou will !ope wit' 9our relations'ip brea"(up 0ore Aui!"l9 and 0ore effe!tivel9.

You !an !'oose an9 t9pe of 'obb9= depending on 9our personal interests. You !an >oin an unprofessional sports tea0= 9ou !an ta"e art= !raft or dan!e !lasses or 9ou !an do gardening or 9oga. You !an even do so0e voluntar9 wor" in 9our !o00unit9. 8n general= it is a good idea for 9ou to !'oose a 'obb9 t'at allows 9ou to so!iali?e wit' ot'er people.

/ind single friends to so!iali?e wit' and part9 wit'. You 0a9 t'in" being single is reall9 terrible t'ing after 9ou 'ave been in a relations'ip for so long. *owever= t'e life of singles is a lot of fun and 9ou s'ould definitel9 let 9our friends s'ow 9ou t'is.

,eet 9our single friends and go to different events wit' t'e0. You will feel a lot 0ore !onfident and t'is will 'elp 9ou !ope wit' 9our relations'ip brea"(up better. ,ore i0portantl9= 9ou will see t'at t'ere are endless opportunities for starting a new and better relations'ip.

Visit 9our loved ones 0ore often. ;'en 9ou are toget'er wit' so0eone= 9ou prefer to spend 0ost of 9our ti0e wit' t'e0. *owever= t'ere are ot'er people w'o love 9ou and !are for 9ou. ,ost of t'e0 'ave a strong bond wit' 9ou. T'is bond is 0u!' stronger t'an t'e bond wit' 9our ex and t'e9 will never leave 9ou.

%pending 0ore ti0e wit' 9our loves ones 0eans 9ou will get t'e support and 'elp 9ou need to re!over after t'e relations'ip brea"(up. 8n addition= 9ou will see 'ow 0u!' t'ese people love 9ou and boost 9our self(!onfiden!e. You will find out t'at t'ere are 0ore valuable t'ings in 9our life t'an a relations'ip t'at was not wor"ing.

Do all of t'ese t'ings to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up easil9 and Aui!"l9.

Tips for Girls :nl9

;o0en are 0ore e0otional t'an 0en. T'at is w'9 9ou

s'ould not worr9 about being over e0otional after a relations'ip brea"(up. 8t is perfe!tl9 natural for 9ou to feel down= to be upset and to !r9. 8n fa!t= grieving for 9our loss is t'e first and fore0ost t'ing to do. Get to a!!ept w'at 'as 'appened= so t'at 9ou !an 0ove on. T'en 9ou need to go t'roug' t'e ot'er stages of re!over9 after a separation.

%'are 'ow 9ou feel wit' 9our best friend or friends. Girls are alwa9s s90pat'eti! w'en it !o0es to a relations'ip brea"(up. T'e9 will understand 9ou and support 9ou. ,ore i0portantl9= t'e9 will give 9ou t'e best advi!e t'at 9ou !an 'ope for. You s'ould not sta9 at 'o0e feeling down and sorr9 for 9ourself.

Get a beaut9 0a"eover to boost 9our self( !onfiden!e. 4ot'ing !an !'eer up a girl better t'an a new 'airst9le= great nails and 0a"e up. A da9 at t'e beaut9 salon s'ould 0a"e 9ou feel 0ore relaxed as well as 0ore beautiful. 9 getting a new and better loo"= 9ou will gain t'e self(estee0 9ou need to forget about 9our ex and fo!us on 9ourself and t'e brig't future t'at expe!ts 9ou.

Get an internal 0a"eover after t'e relations'ip brea"(up as well. After all= self(!onfiden!e s'ould !o0e fro0 wit'in. T'in" of all t'e a0a?ing Aualities 9ou 'ave. Adopt a positive attitude and be 0ore opti0isti! about t'e future. 3epeat to 9ourself t'at ever9t'ing wonderful in life lies a'ead.

Go out wit' 9our friends and 'ave fun. You s'ould feel and loo" great enoug' to start 9our new life as a single. T'is life does not involve sta9ing at 'o0e and wat!'ing TV. 8t is all about en>o9ing t'e t'ings in life t'at were BforbiddenB to 9ou w'ile 9ou were toget'er wit' 9our partner. ,ore i0portantl9= 9ou will get to polis' 9our so!ial s"ills so t'at 9ou are read9 for t'e next stage of t'e relations'ip brea"(up re!over9 pro!ess.

%tart dating again on!e 9ou feel read9 to do so. 9 now 9ou s'ould 'ave !onfiden!e and polis'ed so!ial s"ills= so 9ou s'ould not feel inti0idated b9 dating. @ust re0e0ber t'at dating is all about getting to "now people. Do not resort to it in a state of desperation as 9ou will 0ost !ertainl9 end up deepl9 'urt.

)se all of t'ese tips to re!over fro0 a relations'ip brea"(up 0ore easil9 and Aui!"l9. You !an get 'old of 9our life and 0a"e it better. You >ust 'ave to believe in 9ourself.

Top 3easons to be :pti0isti! about t'e /uture

Grieving is an essential aspe!t of !oping wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. *owever= even t'oug' 9ou s'ould give 9ourself ti0e to grieve= 9ou s'ould also tr9 to regain 9our inner strengt' and positive

attitude. Your end goal s'ould be to get opti0isti! about t'e future and 0a"ing plans to 0ove forward and a!'ieve 9our goals. You 0a9 feel extre0el9 pessi0isti! rig't now= but 9ou s'ould not give in to t'is e0otion. 3ead on to find out w'at reasons for opti0is0 9ou 'ave.

You are now a strong and independent person. You 0a9 not feel li"e t'is rig't now= but t'e fa!t t'at 9ou are !oping wit' t'e relations'ip brea"(up 0eans 9ou will !o0e out of t'is ordeal stronger t'an before. 4ow 9ou !an 0a"e de!isions independentl9 and ta"e full !ontrol of 9our life. 8sn<t t'is a0a?ing#

You !an set 9our own priorities and life goals. You do not 'ave to worr9 about 9our partner agreeing wit' one t'ing or anot'er. You !an 0a"e all de!isions b9 9ourself and in line wit' 9our own 'opes and drea0s. 4ow 9ou !an plan 9our future in an9 wa9 9ou li"e given t'at 9ou 'ave set 9our own priorities and goals.

You 'ave t'e !'an!e to do all t'e fun t'ings 9ou 'ave alwa9s wanted to do. You 0ig't find it diffi!ult to ad0it= but t'e realit9 is t'at relations'ips do !onstrain 9ou in a wa9= espe!iall9 if t'e person is not rig't for 9ou andHor if t'ings are not going well between 9ou two. 4ow 9ou !an use t'e freedo0 9ou 'ave after t'e relations'ip brea"( up to en>o9 life to t'e fullest. @ust re0e0ber t'at 9ou s'ould 'ave fun not in an atte0pt to forget

9our ex= but in an atte0pt to 0a"e 9ourself feel 'app9 and !ontent.

You !an expand 9our 'ori?ons and a!!o0plis' a0a?ing t'ings. 4ow is t'e perfe!t ti0e to do all t'at it ta"es to i0prove 9our life and to be!o0e a better person. You !an be better and 9ou !an do better in t'e future. Do not 'esitate to want and to get 0ore. Ai0 for t'e 'ig'est possible goals as rea!'ing t'e0 will bring 9ou t'e ut0ost satisfa!tion.

You are on 9our wa9 to finding t'e perfe!t life partner for 9ou. A relations'ip brea"(up opens new opportunities for 9ou in ever9 respe!t and espe!iall9 for finding 9our 0at!'. 4ow 9ou do not 'ave to worr9 about being wit' so0eone w'o does not love 9ou and appre!iate 9ou as 0u!' as 9ou would want.

)nderstanding Your E0otions After a 3elations'ip rea"()p

You want to "now 'ow to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. T'e fa!t t'at 9ou are see"ing 'elp= even in an indire!t wa9= 0eans t'at 9ou are read9 and willing to over!o0e t'ese toug' ti0es. T'e first t'ing 9ou need to do in order to 'elp 9ourself is to understand 9our e0otions better. T'is will allow 9ou to feel less stressed out and t'is is t'e first

step towards getting 9our nor0al life ba!".

*ow do 9ou feel rig't now# T'is is t'e first Auestion 9ou need to as" 9ourself in order to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up. Grief is a perfe!tl9 natural feeling for t'is "ind of situation. Even if t'ings were not going well wit' 9our partner= t'e fa!t t'at t'e9 are no longer part of 9our life !an be devastating. You s'ould allow 9ourself to grieve. T'ere is not'ing wrong wit' feeling down and !r9ing at ti0es. 9 letting 9our e0otions out= 9ou will feel a lot better in t'e end.

%adness is anot'er natural e0otion 9ou s'ould a!!ept. 8t is nor0al for 9ou to feel down and lonel9. You 0a9 feel 'opeless andHor wort'less as well. 8t is true t'at t'ese are signs of depression= but 9ou 'ave to a!!ept t'at t'e9 are perfe!tl9 natural. After all= 9ou 'ave lost 9our Bot'er 'alfB= so it is perfe!tl9 natural for 9ou to feel less !onfident and less needed. 8t is also nor0al for 9ou to be worried about t'e future.

Anxiet9 is also !o00on in people w'o 'ave >ust ended a relations'ip. 8t !o0es pri0aril9 fro0 issues t'at t'e brea"(up 'as !aused. You 0a9 worr9 about 9our !'an!es of finding a new partner. You 0a9 feel anxious about finan!ial proble0s or about t'e raising of 9our !'ildren if 9ou 'ave an9. You !an !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up 0ore easil9 if 9ou loo" at 9our situation fro0 a 0ore ob>e!tive point of view. You !an find solutions to 9our

proble0s onl9 if 9ou are !al0 and fo!used.

4ow t'at 9ou understand 9our e0otions= 9ou !an stop worr9ing about experien!ing t'e0 and >ust allow 9ourself to grieve and to be sad for a w'ile. You 0a9 want to slow t'ings down in 9our life a bit so t'at 9our life<s pa!e !orresponds to 9our 0ood. Ta"e 0ore ti0e to relax and to be wit' t'e people 9ou love. ,ost i0portantl9= a!!ept 9our new situation and tr9 to loo" on its good side. T'is will allow 9ou to !ope wit' 9our relations'ip brea"(up effe!tivel9.

;'at 8f Your Ex ;ants You

a!"#

Your ex bro"e up wit' 9ou and now t'e9 want 9ou ba!". T'is !an be a reall9 toug' situation given t'at 9ou are still !oping wit' t'e relations'ip brea"(up. %'ould 9ou >u0p wit' >o9 and go ba!" to t'e0 straig't awa9# :r s'ould 9ou !ut t'e0 off for good# ;'at s'ould 9ou do in a situation li"e t'is# /ind all t'e answers and advi!e 9ou need below.

Do not 'urr9 to sa9 eit'er B9esB or BnoB. 8t is best to t'in" t'ings t'roug' first. T'e 0ost essential t'ing is not to a!t e0otionall9= but to anal9?e t'e situation. You s'ould definitel9 find out w'at 9ou want and w'at it is i0portant for 9ou first.

/ind out w'9 9our ex wants 9ou ba!" after t'e relations'ip brea"(up. You s'ould definitel9 dis!over all t'e reasons for t'is sudden and unexpe!ted !'ange. T'e 0ost i0portant t'ing to as" 9our ex is w'9 t'e9 bro"e up wit' 9ou in t'e first pla!e. You s'ould expe!t to 'ear !li!'es= so be prepared to do a little bit of interrogation if ne!essar9. @ust do not use t'is 0o0ent to get ba!" at 9our for0er partner for t'e split and t'e pain t'e9 !aused 9ou. T'is will not 0a"e 9ou feel better in an9 wa9.

After 9ou "now as 0u!' as possible about 9our ex<s reasoning= 9ou need to leave t'e0 to wait and fo!us on 9our t'oug'ts and e0otions and on t'e t'ings t'at 9ou a!tuall9 want. Tr9 to figure out w'at 9our relations'ip was li"e in t'e first pla!e. ;ere 9ou reall9 'app9# ;ere t'ings going s0oot'l9# ;'9 !ouldn<t 9ou resolve t'e issues t'at led to t'e relations'ip brea"(up# ,ore i0portantl9= 9ou reall9 'ave to as" 9ourself w'et'er 9ou love 9our ex and w'et'er t'e9 reall9 love 9ou.

At t'is point= 9ou s'ould not 0a"e a !o0pro0ise. 8t is perfe!tl9 nor0al for 9ou to worr9 t'at 9ou 0a9 not find a new partner w'o will love 9ou and !are for 9ou. 8f 9ou 'ave !'ildren= 9ou 0a9 be willing to get ba!" toget'er wit' 9our ex for t'eir sa"e. All t'ese t'ings s'ould not be 9our 0ain priorities w'en 9ou !onsider re!on!iliation. 8f 9ou and 9our ex !annot be 'app9 toget'er= t'en t'ings for 9ou and for ever9one around 9ou will be worse.

Tr9 to i0agine w'at 9our future wit' 9our ex will be li"e in order to 0a"e a final de!ision. Tal" to t'e0 so t'at 9ou find out 'ow t'e9 see 9our !o00on future toget'er. /ind out w'at 9our ex wants and w'et'er t'is is exa!tl9 w'at 9ou want. Tr9 to evaluate t'eir readiness to !o00it.

4ow 9ou !an de!ide w'et'er to re!on!ile wit' 9our ex after t'e relations'ip brea"(up or not.

;'at to Do if You

ro"e it :ff

After a relations'ip brea"(up= ever9one feels sorr9 for t'e person w'o was Bdu0pedB. 8f 9ou initiated t'e split= 9ou are 'ig'l9 li"el9 to be!o0e a villain in t'e e9es of ot'ers. *owever= t'is is !ertainl9 not t'e wa9 9ou s'ould feel. )se t'e following tips to re!over after t'e split and to 0anage 9our !o00uni!ation wit' 9our ex better.

A!!ept t'e fa!t t'at 9ou are not t'e onl9 one guilt9 for t'e relations'ip brea"(up. T'e fa!t t'at 9ou initiated t'e split does not 0ean t'at it was entirel9 9our fault t'at t'ings between 9ou were not going well. T'is does not 0ean t'at 9ou s'ould not a!!ept t'e 0ista"es t'at 9ou 'ave 0ade. Cuite t'e opposite= 9ou s'ould learn fro0 t'e0. @ust do not torture 9ourself about so0et'ing t'at is alread9 in t'e past.

Do not feel sorr9 for 9our ex. T'is 0a9 see0 !ruel= but it is a!tuall9 not. 8f 9ou 'ave so0et'ing to sa9 Bsorr9B about= do so. T'ere is no point in getting ba!" toget'er wit' so0eone >ust be!ause 9ou feel guilt and re0orse. Can 9ou 0a"e 9our ex partner feel 'app9 and loved if 9ou do are not 'app9 wit' t'e0 and 9ou do not love t'e0# T'e answer is obviousl9 BnoB. Your ex partner 0a9 suffer= but t'is is t'e onl9 wa9 in w'i!' t'e9 !an re!over fro0 t'e relations'ip brea"(up and 0ove on to find t'e partner t'e9 deserve.

Give 9ourself ti0e to re!over after t'e split. @ust li"e 9our ex= 9ou 0a9 feel upset= angr9 or anxious. Tr9 to experien!e t'ese feelings full9= so t'at 9ou !an over!o0e t'e0. T'is will not 0a"e 9ou wea"er. Cuite t'e opposite= 9ou will be able to be!o0e stronger and 0ore !onfident.

Do not 'urr9 to start dating again. You 0a9 feel relief after t'e relations'ip brea"(up= but t'is does not 0ean t'at 9ou s'ould start seeing ot'er people straig't awa9. As 'ig'lig'ted earlier= give 9ourself so0e ti0e to understand 9our e0otions and gain full !ontrol of t'e0. asi!all9= 9ou 'ave to put t'ings toget'er= so t'at 9ou are read9 to start seeing anot'er person again.

/inall9= 0ove on and leave t'e relations'ip brea"( up in t'e past. ,a"e a plan for 9our life as a single. /o!us on t'e t'ings t'at 9ou love to do.

Establis' 0ore genuine relations'ips wit' 9our loved ones. %tart dating again w'en 9ou feel read9. %tart a new relations'ip w'en 9ou feel t'e ti0e is rig't.

;'at to Do 8f Your Ex *arasses You

8t is not eas9 to go t'roug' a relations'ip brea"( up irrespe!tive of 'ow bad t'ings between 9ou and 9our partner were before t'at. T'e proble0 !an be 0ade even worse if 9our ex partner starts 'arassing 9ou. A lot of people !annot understand t'e gravit9 of t'e issue until it gets t'reatening for t'eir life and wellbeing. T'e i0portant t'ing is not to "eep 9our e9es !losed in !ase of 'arass0ent fro0 9our ex and to ta"e preventative 0easures in ti0e.

*ow do 9ou define 'arass0ent fro0 9our ex partner# 8n general= t'is !an be an9 "ind of a!tion t'at puts 9ou into an un!o0fortable situation= interferes wit' 9our dail9 life and 0a"es 9ou !on!erned about 9our wellbeing. 8n general= 9our ex !alling 9ou t'ree or four ti0es a da9 is !onsidered 'arass0ent= even if t'e9 are a0i!able. T'is is not so0et'ing illegal= but t'is does not 0ean t'at 9ou s'ould put up wit' it.

8t is i0portant for 9ou to re!ogni?e t'ese first warning signs and to deal wit' t'e proble0 straig't awa9. 8n t'is wa9= 9ou will be able to fo!us on

9our own proble0s related to t'e relations'ip brea"(up. 3e0e0ber t'at t'e sooner 9ou ta"e a!tion t'e better.

T'e first t'ing do to is to tal" to 9our ex partner about t'e situation= preferabl9 in person. 8f 9ou de!ide to spea" to t'e0 over t'e p'one= 9ou 0a9 ta"e a!tion first. 8t is i0portant for 9ou not to a!!use 9our ex partner of an9t'ing and not to s'ow 'ow angr9 and upset 9ou are.

@ust explain w'9 9ou wanted to 0eet. As" 9our ex 'ow t'e9 feel and as" w'at 0a"es t'e0 a!t t'is wa9. Explain 'ow t'eir a!tions 0a"e 9ou feel. ,a"e t'e0 understand t'at 9ou feel bad be!ause of w'at t'e9 do. 8n general= 9ou s'ould be 'onest about t'e relations'ip brea"(up and ad0it t'at 9ou find it 'ard to !ope wit' t'e situation too. At t'e sa0e ti0e= explain w'9 t'e present situation is better for bot' of 9ou.

Your tas" is to 0a"e 9our ex partner reali?e t'at t'e9 need to wit'draw !o0pletel9 fro0 9our life and t'at t'is will 0a"e t'e0 feel a lot better. Tr9 to s'ow t'e0 t'e opportunities t'e9 now 'ave as a single. Avoid !o00itting to being friends wit' 9our ex= as t'is 0a9 0a"e t'e0 !ontinue wit' t'e 'arass0ent. 8f t'e Auestion of friends'ip !o0es up= 9ou !an readil9 sa9 t'at it 0a9 be possible in t'e future= but wit'out pla!ing an9 !onditions.

8n !ase t'e 'arass0ent after t'e relations'ip brea"(up be!o0es worse= 9ou s'ould not 'esitate to see" support fro0 fa0il9 and friends and per'aps fro0 a !ounselor.

;ill *ating Your Ex *elp#

,ost people find it diffi!ult to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"(up be!ause t'e9 feel t'at t'e9 still love t'eir ex and want to get ba!" toget'er. Does t'is 0ean t'at 9ou 'ave to 'ate 9our ex to feel better# ;ill t'is 'elp# %'ould 9ou tr9 to do t'is# /ind t'e answers to all t'ese Auestions plus so0e 'elpful advi!e t'at will 'elp 9ou feel better instantl9.

T'e realit9 is t'at 'ating 9our ex is 'ig'l9 unli"el9 to 0a"e 9ou feel better. 8n fa!t= loving or 'ating 9our ex after a relations'ip brea"(up is prett9 0u!' t'e sa0e t'ings in ter0s of t'e reper!ussions t'at it 'as on 9ou. 8n bot' !ases= 9ou will be preo!!upied wit' 9our for0er partner and t'is will prevent 9ou fro0 'ealing 9our own e0otional wounds and 0oving forward.

/eeling 'atred for 9our ex !an get 9ou into anot'er trap t'at is even worse. You !an tr9 to ta"e revenge for t'e suffering t'e9 'ave !aused 9ou. T'is will al0ost !ertainl9 ba!"fire. %eeing 9our ex suffer will not 'elp 9ou feel better. Cuite t'e

opposite= 9ou !an get to experien!e even stronger negative e0otions.

;'at to do if 9ou alread9 feel t'at wa9# *ow to over!o0e t'is negative e0otion after t'e relations'ip brea"(up# You 'ave to reali?e t'at 'ating 9our ex will not get 9ou an9w'ere. You 'ave to reali?e t'at 'ating t'e0 is a!tuall9 torturing 9ourself rat'er t'an 9our ex. You need to start t'in"ing about 9ourself and 'ow to 0a"e 9ourself feel better now and in t'e future.

*ow to !ope wit' t'e relations'ip brea"(up in anot'er wa9 and get over 9our ex# As a start= 9ou 'ave to find out w'9 9our ex is not rig't for 9ou. You will !ertainl9 find a lot of reasons for t'is. *owever= t'ese are not reasons for starting to 'ate t'e0. 9 listing all t'ese fa!ts 9ou will reali?e t'at 9our for0er partner is >ust w'o t'e9 are and !annot give 9ou t'e t'ings 9ou need.

9 doing t'is= 9ou will auto0ati!all9 put 9our fo!us awa9 fro0 9our partner and on to 9ou. 3e0e0ber t'at 9ou are t'e 0ost i0portant person in 9our life. You are t'e one responsible for 9our 'appiness. T'e 0ore positive 9ou are t'e easier it will be for 9ou to ta"e !ontrol of t'ings and to be 'app9.

4ow 9ou "now 'ow to !ope wit' a relations'ip brea"( up wit'out 'ating 9our ex. You will !ertainl9 feel

a lot better after putting t'is advi!e into a!tion.

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8 'ope 09 tips and advi!e was so0e 'elp to 9ou in finding a solution to 9our relations'ip brea"up.

T'an" You= Terr9 Clar"