Students Name: Maha Alghuraibi Date: 1/2014 Evaluation System 1 = Emerging 2 = Developing/Beginning to show criteria 3 = Shows criteria with

some consistency 4 = Capable/usually consistent (Passing) 5 = Experienced/effective 6 = Experienced/effective/consistent 7 = Exceptional/thought-provoking/original Criteria a. Introduction is logically arranged and contains the article title, the publication, the authors name and credibility information, and the articles main/central idea b. Thesis statement addresses the effectiveness of the authors argument c. Body connects the points logically d. Each paragraph introduces and develops one main idea e. Evidence (direct, indirect, quotes, paraphrase) is introduced (signal phrases) and explained f. Includes sufficient supporting evidence; appropriate details/examples support every point g. Credibility of authors source information is evaluated (SaS) h. Conclusion restates thesis in a different way i. Analysis of text distinguishes between personal beliefs and evidence (SaS) Final Draft Instructors 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Section: ____________

j.

Paraphrasing changes words and sentence structure of original text and accurately reflects original idea and intention

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Maha, Overall, Im impressed with your progress. You show that you thought a lot about this essay. Your thesis is strong and I can see you trying to carry that thesis idea throughout the whole essay. Youre more successful in some parts then others. One of the biggest goals I have for you is to work on the development of your observations and ideas. So, in other words, dont assume the reader knows what youre referring to, or what youre thinking. Explain everything more than you think you need to. I tried to mark places in the text where you could develop your ideas further. Additionally, try to focus each paragraph on one central idea rather than trying to include several points within one paragraph. Once you feel comfortable with that, well talk about how to build logical transitions to keep the flow of the essay going smoothly. Youre definitely on the right track and making huge progress. Keep up the good work! Im looking forward to continuing to work with you.

k. Tone is neutral and objective throughout l. Reporting verbs accurately reflect original authors tone and purpose m. Clauses are correctly formed with correct/appropriate word choice (including prepositions and articles), word form (including verb tense and form), and word order. n. Sentences are correctly formed with no fragments or run-ons o. Spelling, punctuation (including commas for introductory phrases and non-essential elements), and capitalization are correct p. Evidence is cited correctly in text; includes full reference in APA style at the end OVERALL:

Maha Alghuraibi ENGH 121 AC3 December 12th, 2013 Summary Analysis Class Dismissed In her article Class Dismissed in Psychology Today, Hara Marano (2006) informs us about Sudbury Valley School in Framingham MA, and examines its different ways of education. She explained that unlike regular schools, Sudbury has been established for those students who want to learn by themselves, or who failed in regular schools, and they found Sudbury is the only solution. These students who failed in regular school might not fail in Sudbury since it depends on nontraditional learning, which is a natural skill that we are born with. Kids are active and love playing, but regular schools prevent them from practicing and exploring what they want. Instead of leaving them playing or practice their interests, teachers ask them to sit down and raise their hands if they want to know something. The article is effective at convincing us that the school is excellent because it informs us about nontraditional way of teaching by including convincing evidence, balancing between pathos, logos, and ethos professionally, and including the future success of students. Maranos argument is clear to comprehend due to the evidence in the article, and it is completely convincing. She used both facts and students experiences that make sense to the reader. First, she grabs our attention by an anecdote of a student from the school, and then she provides some information about Sudbury school that we need to know before examining its way of teaching. Secondly, Marano added the fact that says the learning process is different

from teaching, and that is what Sudbury focuses on. She also added an expert opinion when she mentioned psychologists beliefs on playing importance. In traditional schools, instead of leaving children playing or practicing their interests, teachers ask them to sit down and raise their hands if they want to know something. Unfortunately, they decrease the amount of curiosity, which is a unfortunate thing. Marano succeeded in combining pathos, logos, and ethos in her article. She mentioned parental emotion when she gave an example of a father who sold his house and moved near to Sudbury Valley School because of his four kids. Usually, parental emotions has a strong impact on childrens feelings, and it can persuade them to do what they read, listen, or see. In addition, she mentioned logical example when she told us how Ben a student in Sudbury started reading, and what are the consequences that followed him by giving him a catalyst to do so. Because sometimes emotions are not enough to convince people, the article needs some logic that might help to understand the concept well. Ultimately, Maranos credibility is great. She is an editor in Psychology Today, and her articles should be trusted and worthy. Moreover, she writes the founders of school opinions in some paragraphs that increase the volume of credibility. Balancing between pathos, logos, and ethos makes the article more effective by varying them in each paragraph. Sudbury students do not have educational documents when they graduate since they just have to prove they become adults by writing and presenting a thesis unlike other students from regular schools, and that contributed to make universities admission officers confused. However, the good news is that they could study academically in college by proving their ability in proficiency tests. Students are fulfilled about their lives after Sudbury because it gave them a unique opportunity, which they could not find it elsewhere. Sudbury Valley School is a unique school that pays more attention to the learning process, which helps students to become professional in their interests in the future. As Marano stated we should as parents and teachers give children the freedom to make mistakes. Free playing is important as well to develop their mental and physical skills. This school distinguished in teaching kids responsibility, making judgments, and leadership. Everyone has curiosity for at least one thing, and Sudbury is the perfect place to exercise it.

Marano, H. (May/Jun 2006) Class Dismissed. Psychology Today.