Jazmin Gonzalez

English 2010
Flash memoir
Run Home
I stepped up to the plate, one foot out of the box waiting
for Parer to gi!e me a batting signal" I had to #ontrol m$
breathing, taing in deep breaths to relax m$self" I wrapped
m$ hands around the base of the dar blue and red
%o#ete#h bat that had been m$ go to bat for the past four
$ears" It had been in m$ hands the first time I got a home
run, and later it was in the hands of se!eral of m$
teammates hoping that the$ too would get a home run with
it" It was smaller and shorter than most of the other bats"
&hat added power"
's a #hild I was extremel$ sh$, I was the ind of id $ou
ne!er noti#ed" I had !er$ little #onfiden#e,and I alwa$s felt
powerless" I was the id with su#h horrible stage fright that
during the s#hool pla$ I forgot one of m$ two lines"" (eah,
#onfiden#e and power were two things I felt I would alwa$s
la#, that is until I started pla$ing softball" )$ friend )artha
had to #on!in#e me to go to open g$ms with her, I new she
wouldn*t do it alone, so I went with"
's we entered the g$m we re#ei!ed a warm greeting
from the assistant #oa#hes, the$ introdu#ed us to some of
the girls alread$ on the team" &he$ all had a glow to them+
the$ #arried themsel!es with #onfiden#e and sureness" &he$
new what the$ were doing+ the$ were good" I was !er$
intimidated" ,ow #ould I be part of the team if I was nothing
lie them- I was lie a #hi#en in a flo# of flamingos"
.'tta wa$ bab$/ I hear from se!eral people as a girl
do!e to #at#h a ball, in the g$m/ 0liding in shorts on
hardwood reall$ didn*t seem appealing" I #ould almost feel
m$ sin burning off as I saw her #ome to a stop" 1ith ball in
glo!e she got up as if it was nothing"
.&here is no wa$ I #ould do that".
.,e$, I*m &ori/ (ou must be new, $ou*re going to lo!e
pla$ing with us+ all the girls are reall$ ni#e and so are the
#oa#hes, e!en Parer". 0he said with a per$ smile on her
fa#e, .,e*s not as mean as he loos" Promise".
1hat- ,ow was he not as mean as he looed- ,e
looed lie he would be the leader of a bier gang" ,is fa#e
looed so 2udging+ e$ebrows raised with a half smile tu#ed
behind his handlebar musta#he" ,is head was bald and
shin$, almost lie the sun" ,e looed nothing but mean/ (et
when he opened his mouth and spoe, there was a
gentleness to him, lie if $ou were drun at three in the
morning $ou #ould #all him up and he*d pi# $ou up" E!en
now I #an hear him sa$3
.0wing lie $ou mean it/ 4ome on, I now $ou ha!e
more power in those arms than that Jazz/
Parer new that I had a hard time with m$ #onfiden#e whi#h
lead to powerless little girl swings instead of 5abe %uth
home runs" ,e had us all en#ourage ea#h other, he wouldn*t
tolerate an$ negati!it$" Parer #ounted on the older girls to
help the $ounger pla$ers understand what was expe#ted of
them and to help ea#h other impro!e" I later would be one of
the older girls helping out the $ounger ones" I remember
sta$ing after pra#ti#e and games to help out a girl that was
tr$ing to be on the team, e!er$da$ I would help her get
better" It made me feel important" 0eeing her throws,
#at#hes, pit#hes and te#hni6ues impro!e so mu#h o!er the
#ourse of a few months made me proud" 0eeing her
#onfiden#e impro!e in turn boosted mine, she was a
refle#tion of me"
1ithin the four $ears that I pla$ed softball I learned how
to be a leader" 7uring m$ 2unior $ear Parer pulled me aside
after one of our pra#ti#es to as me to be one of the
#aptains" ' grin spread a#ross m$ fa#e, butterflies were
doing ba# flips in m$ stoma#h as I felt tears starting to form
in the #orners of m$ e$es" I had ne!er felt so good about
m$self" ,e had #onfiden#e in me and I had #onfiden#e in
m$self" Finall$"
.'tta wa$ bab$/.
&hose words were dire#ted towards me as I do!e in the
g$m, I had a wi#ed floor burn on m$ leg but it didn*t faze
me"
.7idn*t that hurt-.
.8o wa$ #ould I do that/.
I remember laughing, di!ing was now an instin#t" I
didn*t thin about floor burns or if I would in2ure m$self" I
wasn*t afraid"
'nd I was not afraid now, four $ears of hard wor and
dedi#ation had lead me to this, with two stries on m$ I
remember the words of 5abe %uth, .8e!er let the fear of
striing out get in $our wa$". )$ heart was ra#ing as I
wat#hed the pit#her mo!e her bod$ into motion and release
the green and red ball from her finger tips" I swung as hard
as I #ould, #onta#t was #ertain"
I didn*t doubt m$self"
I hit the ball"
I ran"
I ran all the wa$ home"