HOW TO DEFEND YOURSELF AGAINST

GOPHERS
Gophers (Thomomys monticola) often invade areas in which large groups of people
gather. They are notorious hoarders, and a single gopher moving down a
concession stand line can do considerable damage in addition to pilfering
dropped sugary snacks, they will snatch any item made of flannel, which they use
to line their underground lairs.
PROTECT YOUR PLAIDS
If you plan to picnic, place a layer of chicken wire with openings no larger than ! underneath
your blanket. Additionally, when storing heavier flannels for summer, it is best to place them
in a wire cage or among your grandmothers lace shawls.


DO NOT RETALIATE
If a gopher insults you, it is best to just walk away, no matter how nasty the term. For every bit
as sharp as their teeth appear, gophers tongues are ten times sharper; you will not win a name-
calling match with these curmudgeonly rodents.



WATCH OUT FOR DIRT MOUNDS
These are decoys that the gophers construct to confuse unsuspecting victims. If you notice
anything suspicious, the gophers are probably already tunnelling past you to reach the
chocolate covered raisins you just turned your back on.

WHY OUR BRIDGES ARE COVERED
WHY THERE ARE NO
BILLBOARDS IN VERMONT
When the Vermont Republic joined the United States in 1791, it had already
adopted a great deal of progressive legislation. Though many are now
considered somewhat out-dated, our core values of preserving the states
beautiful views and rejecting false advertising are apparent in the tone and
language of these regulations:





FOLIAGE : A PRIMER