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When in

Doubt, Kiss
the Fish
And Other
Extremely
Wise
Advice
by John Kremer
and Friends
People will accept your ideas much more
readily if you tell them Benjamin Franklin
said it frst. David H. Comins
hen in dou!t" #uote Franklin.
anonymous
Copyri$ht % &''( !y )ohn *remer
+ll ri$hts reserved.
,llustrations !y Phil Frank
Copyri$ht % -../ !y Creative 0edia
1ervices
2pen Hori3ons
P. 2. Bo4 &((5
6aos 70 (585-
858958-9//.(
Fa4: 858958-9/-''
e!: http:;;www.#uota!le!ooks.com
A
6he !e$innin$ of wisdom is found in
dou!tin$< !y dou!tin$ we come to the
#uestion" and !y seekin$ we may come
upon the truth. Pierre +!elard" priest
,f you had any dou!t a!out that" =ady
>laine" you mi$ht have asked. +fter all" you
have words and that?s what words are for"
aren?t they@ =ady Betty +!erlin
hen in dou!t" kiss the fsh. )onathan
+dolph
He who !elieves is stron$< he who dou!ts is
weak. 1tron$ convictions precede $reat
actions. =ouisa 0ay +lcott" novelist
=au$h at yourself" !ut don?t ever aim your
dou!t at yourself. Be !old. hen you
em!ark for stran$e places" don?t leave any
of yourself safely on shore. Have the nerve
to $o into une4plored territory. +lan +lda"
actor
hen in dou!t" don?t. =amar +le4ander"
Lamar Alexander's Little Plaid Book
hen in dou!t" a!stain. +le4ei
+le4androvich" character in Anna Karenina
!y =eo 6olstoy
hen in dou!t" close your eyes. 6hink of
>n$land. +mos" ,sraeli a$ent in The
Assignment movie
hen in dou!t" act like a $orilla. +ntoine"
director character in Early Edition 6A show
hen in dou!t" make like Donald 6rump.
)ennifer +rmstron$" Entertainment Weekly
,f you dou!t yourself" wear somethin$ else.
+ussieBum ma$a3ine advertisement
B
,f a man will !e$in with certainties" he shall
end in dou!ts< !ut if he will !e content to
!e$in with dou!ts he shall end in
certainties. Francis Bacon" philosopher
ho never dou!ted" never half !elieved.
here dou!t is" there truth isit is her
shadow. Philip )ames Bailey" poet
hen in dou!t" you can always consult.
Byan Bakken" journalist
eary the path that does not challen$e.
Dou!t is an incentive to truth and patient
in#uiry leadeth the way. Hosea Ballou"
preacher
,n necessary thin$s" unity< in dou!tful
thin$s" li!erty< in all thin$s" charity.
Bichard Ba4ter" Puritan
hen in dou!t" leave it at home. 0ichael
Becraft
hen youCre up to your nose in shit" keep
your mouth shut. )ack Beaure$ard"
character in My Name Is Nobody movie
hen in dou!t" peel out. +le4 Bla$$"
!lo$$er" Blo$$ Blo$$
,f the 1un and 0oon should ever dou!t"
theyCd immediately $o out. illiam Blake"
poet and artist
hen in dou!t" wear red. Bill Blass"
fashion desi$ner
Duidelines for !ureaucrats: -E hen in
char$e" ponder. &E hen in trou!le"
dele$ate. /E hen in dou!t" mum!le.
)ames H. Boren
Dou!t whom you will" !ut never yourself.
Christine Bovee
hen in dou!t" lau$h at yourself. 1onia
Bra$a" actress
, have a rule that has served me well in life.
hen in dou!t" do nothin$. ,f you?re not
sure" don?t !uy it" don?t comment" don?t
commit. 1it ti$ht. 6empe Brennan"
forensic anthropolo$ist in *athy Beich?s
Dea Dead
Bemem!er" when in dou!t" you should
never do what you truly want to do.
7athan Bronfman" character in !"man
Nat"re movie
hen in dou!t" cut to the skyline. )amie
Buchman" character in Mad Abo"t #o" 6A
show Freadin$ a fortune cookieE
6here is nothin$ more dreadful than the
ha!it of dou!t. Dou!t separates people. ,t is
a poison that disinte$rates friendships and
!reaks up pleasant relations. ,t is a thorn
that irritates and hurts< it is a sword that
kills. Buddha" founder of Buddhism
7ever despair" !ut if you do" work on in
despair. >dmund Burke" British
statesman
hen in dou!t" D2 somethin$. ,f it turns
out to !e wron$" correct it. But you will
never know until you do it. ,van Burnell"
author
C
hen in dou!t" end with a #uote. 0ichael
Cader" !ook producer
hen all else fails" read the instructions.
Cahn?s +4iom
,f you are ever in dou!t as to whether to
kiss a pretty $irl" always $ive her the
!eneft of the dou!t. 6homas Carlyle"
philosopher
hen in dou!t" just cook it. 0ary
Carmichael
,naction !reeds dou!t and fear. +ction
!reeds confdence and coura$e. ,f you want
to con#uer fear" do not sit home and think
a!out it. Do out and $et !usy. Dale
Carne$ie" motivational author
hen in dou!t" my dears" take an e4treme
case. =ewis Carroll" author
Bemem!er" when in dou!t" throw it to
CarterG Chris Carter" foot!all receiver
hen in dou!t" eat. =isa Cates" character
in A"g"st $ires movie
hen in dou!t" have some!ody enter the
room with a $un. Baymond Chandler"
detective novelist
hen in dou!t" have two $uys come
throu$h the door with $uns. Baymond
Chandler" detective novelist
hen in dou!t" su$$est that a
su!committee !e appointed. Harry
Chapman
henever you have dou!ts a!out
somethin$" communicateG 6alk" talk" talk
until the pro!lem resolves. hen you feel
stress" disa$reement or resistance !etween
you and someone near you" the wron$ thin$
to do is i$nore the pro!lem. ,nstead" start
communicatin$. 0ike Chatelain" author"
6ipsFor1uccess.or$
,f you listen" one day you mi$ht !e heard.
+nd when in dou!t" use the smell test.
0aurice Chave3" character in %rand The&t
A"to' (i)e *ity video $ame
6he men who really !elieve in themselves
are all in lunatic asylums. Dil!ert *eith
Chesterton" novelist" +rthodoxy
Dreat dou!ts" deep wisdom. 1mall dou!ts"
little wisdom. Chinese prover!
hen in dou!t" !uy your man a cordless
drill. ,t does not matter if he already has
one. , have a friend who owns -5 and he has
yet to complain. +s a man" you can never
have too many cordless drills. 7o one
knows why. Christmas Dift ,deas for 0en
7early all societies have the instinct is to
lock up any!ody who is truly free. First"
society !e$ins !y tryin$ to !eat you up. ,f
this fails" they try to poison you. ,f this fails
too" they fnish !y loadin$ honors on your
head. inston Churchill" British prime
minister
By dou!tin$ we come to truth. Cicero"
philosopher and orator
He who !elieves is stron$< he who dou!ts is
weak. 1tron$ convictions precede $reat
actions. ). F. Clarke
hen in dou!t" lie your head oH. Brian
Clou$hley" journalist" *o"nterP"n)h
,f all else fails" issue an ultimatum.
married hus!and with child" *old $eet 6A
show
hen in dou!t" just say" IBut how do you
feel a!out that@J 6ess Coleman"
character in $reaky $riday movie
Dou!t is the vesti!ule which all must pass
!efore they can enter the temple of wisdom.
hen we are in dou!t and pu33le out the
truth !y our own e4ertions" we have $ained
somethin$ that will stay !y us and will serve
us a$ain. But if to avoid the trou!le of the
search we avail ourselves of the superior
information of a friend" such knowled$e will
not remain with us< we have not !ou$ht" !ut
!orrowed it. Charles Cale! Colton"
author
hen you have nothin$ to say" say nothin$.
Charles Cale! Colton" author
hen in dou!t" delete it. Philip Cos!y
hen in dou!t" check him out. )oseph
Culli$an" !ook title
hen in dou!t" slin$ eHort at it. Deor$e
. Cummin$s" 1r.
hen in dou!t" mull. 0ario Cuomo"
$overnor
D
)ust think of the tra$edy of teachin$
children not to dou!t. Clarence Darrow"
attorney
hen in dou!t" make no chan$e at all.
Phil Davis" president" 6un$sten Brilliant
Brand 0arketin$
,f you would !e a real seeker after truth" it
is necessary that at least once in your life
you dou!t" as far as possi!le" all thin$s.
Bene Descartes" philosopher
6he frst precept was never to accept a
thin$ as true until , knew it as such without
a sin$le dou!t. Bene Descartes
hen in dou!t" fnd another sponsor. hen
in trou!le" hire a wran$ler. Because thereCs
never enou$h time. +nd there never will !e.
Hilary De Aries" entertainment journalist"
The %i&t Bag *hroni)les
hen you don?t know what to do" walk fast
and look worried. Dilbert's La,s o& Work
hen in dou!t" do as the Bomans do.
Hu$h D. Dillehay
hen in dou!t" $ive a !ook. Dis)o"nt
Portland %"ide
hen in dou!t" try the nearest !ad $uy.
)immy Di4" character in The Last Boy -)o"t
movie
,n my !ook" if you fail at donuts" youCve
failed at life. donut mana$er" character in
Madonna' Inno)en)e Lost 6A movie
hen in dou!t" ,Cve found retracin$ your
steps a wise place to !e$in. +l!us
Dum!ledore" character in !arry Potter and
the Prisoner o& A.kaban movie
E
,f in dou!t" farm it out. The E)onomist
ma$a3ine headline
6wo people only hurt each other if they
dou!t the love they have for one another.
6om >dison" character in Dog/ille movie
Beal love is more than a physical feelin$. ,f
there?s even the sli$htest dou!t in your
head a!out a $uy" then for$et a!out it. ,t?s
not real. >than >m!ry
Finish each day and !e done with it. Kou
have done what you could. 1ome !lunders
and a!surdities no dou!t crept in" for$et
them as soon as you can. 6omorrow is a
new day" you shall !e$in it well and
serenely. Balph aldo >merson" essayist
hen in dou!t" ask your tailor. Es0"ire
ma$a3ineCs 6he 7ew =aws of Fashion
Freedom of speech and freedom of action
are meanin$less without freedom to think.
+nd there is no freedom of thou$ht without
dou!t. Ber$en >vans" author" The
Nat"ral !istory o& Nonsense
F
6here is no harm in dou!t and skepticism"
for it is throu$h these that new discoveries
are made. Bichard Feynman" physicist
hat every computer consultant needs to
know: -E ,n case of dou!t" make it sound
convincin$. &E Do not !elieve in miracles.
Bely on them. Fina$le?s Bules
hen in dou!t" donCt pitch it out. foot!all
option rule
,f you don?t know what to do with many of
the papers piled on your desk" stick a do3en
collea$ues? initials on ?em" and pass them
alon$. hen in dou!t" route. 0alcolm
For!es" ma$a3ine pu!lisher
hen in dou!t" duck. 0alcolm For!es"
ma$a3ine pu!lisher
hen in dou!t" make a western. )ohn
Ford" movie director
=ord" make me an instrument of your peace.
here there is hatred" let me sow love.
here there is injury" pardon. here there
is dou!t" faith. here there is despair"
home" here there is darkness" li$ht.
here there is sadness" joy. 1aint Francis
of +ssisi" Prayer o& -t1 $ran)is
hen in dou!t" donCt. Ben Franklin"
inventor" patriot" scientist" author"
pu!lisher" statesman
hen in dou!t" medicate. Dr. ,an
Frechette" character in *"2id 6A show
hen in dou!t" destroy. >ven if you $o
down with your captive. ). >. Freedman"
Abo/e the La,
hen in dou!t" $allopG prover! of the
French Forei$n =e$ion
hen in dou!t" just include those four
letters we all love
to see in printFB>>. +l!ert Fried9
Cassorla

hen in dou!t" donCt think too much. Close


your eyes" play" and have fun. Dave Da$e"
author" Harmonica =essons.com
hen in dou!t" $et up oH the chair and
stand up for practicin$ and jammin$ to
facilitate $ood !reathin$ ha!its. 6ry to
stand erect with your head up" !ack
strai$ht" and !ody rela4ed. Dave Da$e"
author" Harmonica =essons.com
hen in dou!t" lick your lips. Dave Da$e"
author" Harmonica =essons.com
Dou!t is the father of invention. Dalileo
Dalilei" astronomer
hen in dou!t" call a pro. )ackie Dallo$ly"
marketin$ technolo$y oHicer" ,n!o4
,nteractive
,f in dou!t" always follow your nose.
Dandalf the wi3ard in The $ello,shi2 o& the
3ing movie
hen in dou!t" do without. 1amuel !en
Hofni Daon" ra!!i
hen in dou!t" apply !oo3e. =uke
Darrison" character in novel" Abo/e the La,
!y ). >. Freedman
hen in dou!t" donCt. 1aul Dellerman"
academic
For the truly faithful" no miracle is
necessary. For those who dou!t" no miracle
is suHicient. 7ancy Di!!s
Dou!t is a pain too lonely to know that faith
is his twin !rother. *ahlil Di!ran" poet
Believe those who are seekin$ the truth.
Dou!t those who fnd it. +ndre DidL"
novelist and critic
,f you must tell me your opinions" tell me
what you !elieve in. , have plenty of dou!ts
of my own. )ohann olf$an$ von Doethe"
poet and essayist
e know accurately only when we know
little< with knowled$e dou!t increases.
)ohann olf$an$ von Doethe" poet and
essayist
hen in dou!t" peddle disinformation.
Dave Dold!er$" foot!all writer
hen in dou!t" $o defense. Dave
Dold!er$" foot!all writer
+ mind trou!led !y dou!t cannot focus on
the course to victory. +rthur Dolden"
novelist" Memoirs o& a %eisha
,t is a $reat thin$ to know e4actly what to
do in an emer$ency. hen in dou!t whether
to attack or retreat" , never hesitate a
moment. , toss a copper. Dordon Dran$er"
$eneral
hen in dou!t" do more homework. +ndy
Dreen
hen in dou!t" trust your instincts. +ndy
Dreen
hen in dou!t" $o with the little voice in
your head. +ndy Dreen
hen in dou!t" ask what your mom would
do. +ndy Dreen
hen in dou!t" ask what would a horse do
in this situation. +ndy Dreen
hen in dou!t" ask what would +!raham
=incoln do in this situation. +ndy Dreen
Dou!t ?til thou canst dou!t no more...dou!t
is thou$ht and thou$ht is life. 1ystems
which end dou!t are devices for dru$$in$
thou$ht. +l!ert Duerard
hen in dou!t" press a lot of !uttons.
Dyro" the scientist FDonald D")k showE
!
hen in dou!t" make a fool of yourself.
6here is a microscopically thin line !etween
!ein$ !rilliantly creative and actin$ like the
most $i$antic idiot on earth. 1o what the
hell" leap. Cynthia Heimel
hen in dou!t" punt. )ohn Heisman"
foot!all coach
hen in dou!t" donCt. )im Hendrickson"
mer$ers and ac#uisitions
hen in dou!t" eat parsley. )ulia Hidy"
author
ise men" when in dou!t whether to speak
or to keep #uiet" $ive themselves the !eneft
of the dou!t" and remain silent. 7apoleon
Hill" motivational author
hen in dou!t" you $uess 7ew )ersey.
Dary Ho!son" character in Early Edition 6A
show
hen facin$ a diHicult task" act as thou$h
it?s impossi!le to fail. hen $oin$ after
0o!y Dick" take alon$ the tartar sauceG
)oel Hod$son" host" Mystery -)ien)e
Theater 4555 6A show
2ur achievements speak for themselves.
hat we have to keep track of are our
failures" discoura$ements and dou!ts. e
tend to for$et the past diHiculties" the many
false starts" and the painful $ropin$. e see
our past achievements as the end results of
a clean forward thrust" and our present
diHiculties as si$ns of decline and decay.
>ric HoHer" psycholo$ist
hen in dou!t" do it. 2liver endell
Holmes )r." author
6o have dou!ted one?s own frst principles is
the mark of a civili3ed man. 2liver
endell Holmes )r." author
hen all other contin$encies fail" whatever
remains however impro!a!le must !e the
truth. 1herlock Holmes" character in
-herlo)k !olmes and the *ase o& the -ilk
-to)king 6A movie
hen in dou!t" don?t open other people?s
mailG Pat Holt" editor
hen in dou!t" taunt. Pat Holt" editor
hen in dou!t" !lame it on the !rick9and9
mortarsG Pat Holt" editor
hen in dou!t" try this mantra: Precise and
spare< precise and spare< precise and spare.
Pat Holt" editor
hen in dou!t" $o !road. Dre$ory House"
character in !o"se6 M1D1 6A show
hen in dou!t" follow someone. David
Housewri$ht" #uotin$ from Chapter Four of
the 7ni/ersal Pri/ate Eye Instr")tion
Man"al6 Third Edition
hen in dou!t" ask for permission. >.
*eith Howick )r." pu!lisher
1o that is the !asic lesson that any!ody
learns in this universe. 6hey learn to keep
their mouth shut" and itCs the wron$ lesson.
hen in dou!t" talk. hen in dou!t"
communicate. =. Bon Hu!!ard" founder
of 1cientolo$y
hen in dou!t" attack ,ra#. 0ike Hume"
editor" 1piked 2nline
"
Dou!t is the !e$innin$" not the end" of
wisdom. Deor$e ,les
Confusion is always the most honest
response. 0arty ,ndik
hen in dou!t" don?t !other. ,nternet
humor
hen in dou!t" i$nore it. ,nternet humor
J
hen perple4ed" confused" frustrated and
all else has failed" fall !ack on the truth.
)Cs Business 0a4im
hen in dou!t" risk it. Hol!rook )ackson"
editor and journalist
1ecret MN/N: 6he !oss is never wron$.
1ecret MN/8: hen in dou!t" see secret
MN/N.
)immy )ames" character in Ne,s3adio 6A
show
hen an$ry" count ten !efore you speak< if
very an$ry" a hundred. 6homas )eHerson"
O.1. president
K
hen in dou!t" remove your hat. Deor$e
*alo$erakis
hen in dou!t" !lame Clinton;Dore.
0adeleine Be$un *ane
hen in dou!t" print ?em out. *arl?s
Pro$rammin$ Prover! '45
hen in dou!t" throw a whole lot of onion
and $arlic seeds around. *aren *eefe
hen in dou!t" look intelli$ent. Darrison
*eillor" radio personality
Chest pain: hen in dou!t" have it seenP.
1o if you suspect that you mi$ht !e havin$ a
heart attack" call .-- immediatelyit may
!e well worth the money. Bichard *er!er"
professor of internal medicine
Dou!t yourself and you dou!t everythin$
you see. )ud$e yourself and you see jud$es
everywhere. But if you listen to the sound of
your own voice" you can rise a!ove dou!t
and jud$ment. +nd you can see forever.
7ancy *erri$an" ice skater
,f my parents still $et upset over the
o!scene portion si3e of +merican food" ,
seriously dou!t ,?m $onna make any inroads
with >minem. =ane *im" character in
%ilmore %irls 6A show
hen in dou!t" order the !ur$er. 6he !est
advice my father ever $ave me: ,f you?re in
an esta!lishment where the food is
#uestiona!le" you $o with the ham!ur$er
every sin$le time. )immy *immel" 6A host
hen in dou!t" , say $o youn$. Peter
*in$" sports columnist
hen in dou!t" re!oot. Dennis *neale
hen in dou!t" simplify. Chuck *no4"
foot!all coach
6here are two ways to slide easily throu$h
life< to !elieve everythin$ or to dou!t
everythin$. Both ways save us from
thinkin$. +lfred *or3y!ski" lo$ician and
scientist
+ weak man has dou!ts !efore a decision" a
stron$ man has them afterwards. *arl
*raus" journalist
,n case of dou!t" decide in favor of what is
correct. *arl *raus" journalist
hen in dou!t" do it todayG )ohn *remer
,t really doesnCt take many words to tell a
story" make a joke" or move people to tears
of lau$hter or sorrow. hen in dou!t" cut
some more. )ohn *remer" author
#
7ever dou!t the coura$e of the French.
6hey were the ones who discovered that
snails are edi!le. Dou$ =arson" humorist
hen in dou!t" choose !lack. )eanne
0arie =askasCs fashion advice
hen in dou!t" choke him out. Dene
=eBell" $rapplin$ master
hen in dou!t" it is !est to lean to the side
of mercy. =e$al 0a4im
6o !elieve with certainty we must !e$in
with dou!tin$. 1tanislaus =escynski
hen in dou!t" use parsley. +my =ester"
!lo$$er
hen in dou!t" $o down. 0ichael =evine"
pu!licist" Le/ine Breaking Ne,s
,f all else fails" the character of a man can
!e reco$ni3ed !y nothin$ so surely as !y a
jest which he takes !adly. Deor$
Christoph =ichten!er$" physicist and
satirist
2ne?s frst step in wisdom is to #uestion
everythin$and one?s last is to come to
terms with everythin$. Deor$ Christoph
=ichten!er$" physicist and satirist
First there is a time when we !elieve
everythin$" then for a little while we !elieve
with discrimination" then we !elieve
nothin$ whatever" and then we !elieve
everythin$ a$ainand" moreover" $ive
reasons why we !elieve. Deor$ Christoph
=ichten!er$" physicist and satirist
,t is !etter to remain silent and !e thou$ht
a fool than to speak out and remove all
dou!t. +!raham =incoln" O.1. president
Dentlemen of the jury. =aw says that a man
can not !e found $uilty if there?s a
reasona!le dou!t in the minds of the jury. ,
aim to raise that dou!t in your minds"
friends. +!e =incoln" character in Abe
Lin)oln' $reedom $ighter movie
,f we are ever in dou!t a!out what to do" it
is a $ood rule to ask ourselves what we
shall wish on the morrow that we had done.
)ohn =u!!ock" politician and !iolo$ist
=ook at a man in the midst of dou!t and
dan$er" and you will learn in his hour of
adversity what he really is. =ucretius"
poet
hen in dou!t" lie. 0r. =yle" character in
The Pretender 6A series
hen in dou!t" take it as a compliment.
+n$ie =yman
$
hen in dou!t" faith it. ayne 0ackey
1o when in dou!t" you kiss Crai$@ Crai$
0annin$" character in Degrassi' The Next
%eneration 6A series
hen in dou!t" admit it. Be truthful a!out
your own skills and a!ilities. 6ake
responsi!ility for informin$ others when
you need additional support and trainin$.
0arch of Dimes we! site" 3"les &or the
3oad
hen in dou!t" !lame the patriarchy frst.
6he frst person to !lame for somethin$ is
6he 0an. +manda 0arcotte" !lo$$er
,t is easier to !elieve than to dou!t.
>verett D. 0artin
hen in dou!t" write a!out a funeral.
Frank 0cCourt" author" Angela's Ashes
hen all else fails" !lame the other woman.
D.+. )ack 0cCoy" character in La, 8
+rder 6A show
hen in dou!t" procrastinate nowG Fred
0ercer
hen in dou!t" predict that the present
trend will continue. 0erkin?s 0a4im
,f you think youCve hit a false note" sin$
loud. hen in dou!t" sin$ loud. Bo!ert
0errill" composer
hen in dou!t" spend $o!s of cash on ads
in all the major newspapers on a one9day
rampa$e a$ainst $overnment. 6hat always
!eats !efriendin$ politicians and
!ureaucrats. 6op -' 0icrosoft 7on9
0onopolistic 1lo$ans
,n case of dou!t" do a little more than you
have to. arren 0itchell" actor
, respect faith" !ut dou!t is what $ets you
an education. ilson 0i3ner"
screenwriter
hen in dou!t" shred it. Bussell
0okhi!er and Bo!ert eissman" authors"
*or2orate Predators
Dou!ts are more cruel than the worst of
truths. 0oliere" dramatist
6o philosophi3e is to dou!t. 0ichel de
0ontai$ne" essayist
hen in dou!t" $o hi$her. Mo"ntain
%a.ette motto
hen in dou!t" shout !ack. +nd shout
louder. 0ike 0uldoon" 7avy 1eal
character in 1u3anne Brockmann?s Into the
Night
Have a delay !utton Fprefera!ly &' seconds
or moreE and when in dou!t" use it. >rich
0ancow 0uller" radio personality"
0ancowCs Commandments for Badio
Personalities
*nowled$e and personality make dou!t
possi!le" !ut knowled$e is also the cure of
dou!t< and when we $et a full and ade#uate
sense of personality we are lifted into a
re$ion where dou!t is almost impossi!le"
for no man can know himself as he is" and
all fullness of his nature" without also
knowin$ Dod. 6. 6. 0un$er
hen in dou!t" empty your ma$a3ine.
0urphy?s Bules of Com!at 2perations
hen in dou!t" !elly !uttons !elon$ on
06A" $uitars on AH9-. My %eneration
ma$a3ine
%
hen in dou!t" hold it or throw it away.
)im 7ance" foot!all commentator
Frantic orthodo4y is never rooted in faith
!ut in dou!t. ,t is when we are unsure that
we are dou!ly sure. Beinhold 7ie!uhr"
theolo$ian
hen in dou!t" sweat it outG )ay 7orth"
author" !o, -a&e is #o"r $ood9 Mira)les in
the Kit)hen
hen in dou!t" whip it out. 6ed 7u$ent"
rock musician and $un advocate F#uoted !y
David 1padeE
O
hen in dou!t" do it yourself. *eith
2l!erman" sports commentator
hen in dan$er"
hen in dou!t"
Bun in circles"
1cream and shout.
2ld 1ailor?s Prover!
hen in dou!t" $et a dou$hnut. 0any of the
!ad thin$s that happen in cars driven !y
teena$ers happen !ecause a kid is ticked
oH" heart!roken" disappointed" tired" or
depressedP. Pullin$ over for a dou$hnut
and coHee is the perfect antidote to an4iety.
Hu$h 2C7eill" ma$a3ine columnist
,n our !rief national history we have shot
four of our presidents" worried fve of them
to death" impeached one and hounded
another out of oHice. +nd when all else
fails" we hold an election and assassinate
their character. P. ). 2?Bourke" humorist
&
hen in dou!t" read the !ook. +lan
Parker" movie director
Chill: hen in dou!t" throw it outP. 7ever
taste food that looks or smells stran$e to
see if you can still use it. )ust discard it.
Partnership for Food 1afety >ducation
hen in dou!t" kill cute thin$s. 1tephan
Pastis" author
hen in dou!t" o!serve and ask #uestions.
hen certain" o!serve at len$th and ask
many more #uestions. Deor$e Patton"
$eneral
hen in dou!t" attack. Dave Pell"
!lo$$er" da/eneti)s
Dou!t is the key to knowled$e. Persian
prover!
,f we $et our information from the !i!lical
material there is no dou!t that the Christian
life is a dancin$" leapin$" darin$ life.
>u$ene Peterson
hen in dou!t a!out usin$ a trademark in
your meta ta$" leave it out. =isa Picarille"
editor
hen in dou!t" put on the $inding Nemo
DAD. , think itCs a wonderful movie" !ut the
kids feel that way" too. 0ohammed Pinto"
childrenCs entertainer
hen in dou!t" leave it out. Don?t rely solely
on lawyers. Brian Pittman" editor" Master
:o"rnalist
hen in dou!t" add more wine. pla#ue
hen in dou!t P shop. 1tephanie Plum"
!ounty hunter character in Ten Big +nes !y
)anet >vanovich
,n other words" if all that are availa!le are
the percenta$es" the Q chart provides an
e4cellent appro4imation to the p chart. 6he
same conclusion applies to data for the np
chart" c chart" u chart" si$ma chart" etc. ,n
all these cases" and more" the 1wiss army
knife of control charts allows the process
operator to focus on data. 2ne could even
ar$ue that the simplicity of usin$ a sin$le
chart instead of several charts outwei$hs
the mathematical advanta$es in many
cases. 1o" when in dou!t" $et the Q chart
out. 6homas Py3dek" president" Ruality
Pu!lishin$
'
hen in dou!t" always hide secret formulas
in your !ra. 6hen make out with Aal *ilmer.
Brian Baftery" journalist
hen in dou!t" kill. Bam!o" character in
$irst Light movie
Fidelity to commitment in the face of dou!ts
and fears is a very spiritual thin$. Beal
=ive Preacher
e think havin$ faith means !ein$
convinced Dod e4ists in the same way we
are convinced a chair e4ists. People who
cannot !e completely convinced of DodCs
e4istence think faith is impossi!le for them.
7ot so. People who dou!t can have $reat
faith !ecause faith is somethin$ you do" not
somethin$ you think. ,n fact" the $reater
your dou!t" the more heroic your faith.
Beal =ive Preacher
6he only limit to our reali3ation of
tomorrow will !e our dou!ts of today.
Franklin D. Boosevelt" O.1. president
6he country needs and" unless , mistake its
temper" the country demands !old"
persistent" e4perimentation. ,t is common
sense to take a method and try it" if it fails"
admit it frankly and try another. But a!ove
all" try somethin$. 6heodore Boosevelt"
O.1. president
hen in dou!t" compartmentali3e. 0. ).
Bose" !lo$$er and novelist
6here is no dou!t in my mind that there are
many ways to !e a winner" !ut there is
really only one way to !e a loser and that is
to fail and not look !eyond the failure.
*yle Bote" )r.
hen in dou!t" hold on to your altitude. 7o
one has ever collided with the sky. Bules
of the +ir
,f in dou!t" don?t. Beware the man
possessed of little self9dou!t. Donald
Bumsfeld" O.1. secretary of defense
,f in dou!t" don?t. ,f still in dou!t" do what?s
ri$ht. Donald Bumsfeld" O.1. secretary of
defense
, !elieve that the frst test of a truly $reat
man is his humility. , don?t mean !y
humility" dou!t of his power. But really
$reat men have a curious feelin$ that the
$reatness is not of them" !ut throu$h them.
+nd they see somethin$ divine in every
other man and are endlessly" foolishly"
incredi!ly merciful. )ohn Buskin" essayist
and reformer
6he whole pro!lem with the world is that
fools and fanatics are always so certain of
themselves" !ut wiser people so full of
dou!ts. Bertrand Bussell" philosopher
and mathematician
, think we ou$ht always to entertain our
opinions with some measure of dou!t. ,
shouldn?t wish people do$matically to
!elieve any philosophy" not even mine.
Bertrand Bussell" philosopher and
mathematician
? ? ? ?
,n all aHairs it?s a healthy thin$ now and
then to han$ a #uestion mark on the thin$s
you have lon$ taken for $ranted.
Bertrand Bussell" philosopher and
mathematician
(
2n pla$iarism: hen in dou!t" check it outG
1afety 7et S&learn.ca
hen in dou!t" !lame ,srael. +le4 1afan"
associate director" Committee for +ccuracy
in 0iddle >ast Beportin$ in +merica
henever there is any dou!t" there is no
dou!t. 6hat?s the frst thin$ they teach you.
1am" character in 3onin movie
hen in dou!t" !lame the writers. 0ark
1arvas" !lo$$er" >le$ant Aariation
DonCt email if you donCt have to. hen in
dou!t" initiate face9to9face dialo$s
FshudderE. ill 1chwal!e and David
1hipley" authors" -end' The Essential %"ide
to Email &or +;i)e and !ome
hen in dou!t" nuke TemP. e risk
escalatin$ a worldwide nuclear arms race in
order to nuke a shadow terrorist enemy
whose most eHective military weapon to
date has !een !o4 cutters. Bo!ert 1cheer"
columnist
hen in dou!t" mum!le. 0ichael
1chu!ert" !lo$$er
hen in dou!t" if you or someone you are
with !e$ins to have chest discomfort"
especially with one or more of the other
si$ns of a heart attack" call .9-9- ri$ht away.
DonCt wait for more than a few minutes8
minutes at mostto call .9-9-.
1eekellness.com
2ur dou!ts are traitors"
+nd make us lose the $ood we oft mi$ht win
By fearin$ to attempt.
illiam 1hakespeare" playwri$ht"
Meas"re &or Meas"re
hen in dou!t" insert a scene set at a strip
clu!" no matter how irrelevant. hen it
comes to cheap titillation" there?s nothin$
like nearly naked show$irls caressin$ metal
poles. 6om 1hales" screenwriter
hen in dou!t" !ack out on a technicality.
alter 1hapiro" political columnist" 7-A
Today
hen in dou!t" attack immi$rants. 1cott
1hields" journalist Fin a story on a political
campai$nE
hen in dou!t" $o !ack to the evidence.
1idney
=i!erty is the possi!ility of dou!tin$" the
possi!ility of makin$ a mistake" the
possi!ility of searchin$ and e4perimentin$"
the possi!ility of sayin$ 7o to any authority
literary" artistic" philosophic" reli$ious"
social and even political. ,$na3io 1ilone"
author" The %od That $ailed
Dou!t is part of all reli$ion. +ll the reli$ious
thinkers were dou!ters. ,saac Bashevis
1in$er" novelist
hen in dou!t" fuck. =t. Col. Frank
1lade" character in -)ent o& a Woman movie
hen you cannot make up your mind which
of the two evenly !alanced courses of action
you should do" choose the !older. . ).
1lim
hen in dou!t" tell the truth. 1penser?s
rules FBo!ert B. ParkerE
Kou leave >arth and anythin$ you for$et to
!rin$ with you will kill you. +nythin$ you do
!rin$ with you which doesn?t work properly
will kill you. hen in dou!t" just assume
e/erything will kill you. 7athan 1prin$"
character in -tar *o2s movie
hen in dou!t" follow the yellow !rick road.
Bernard ). 1rode" author" When in Do"bt6
$ollo, the #ello, Book 3oad
6o !elieve with certainty we must !e$in !y
dou!tin$. 1tanislas ," kin$ of Poland
hen in dou!t" pinky out. Patrick 1tar"
character in -2ongeBob -0"arePants 6A
show
hen in dou!t" hed$e. =inda 1tern"
!usiness journalist" Ne,s,eek
6here?s only one thin$ , know a!out
cookin$: hen in dou!t" add enou$h !utter
to $rease yomin$. >d 1tevens"
character in Ed 6A show
hen in dou!t" assume itCs a clue. )esse
1tone" character in Death in Paradise 6A
movie
hen in dou!t" throw it out. Aicki 1ue
hen in dou!t who will win" !e neutral.
1wiss prover!
Du!ito er$o sum. , dou!t therefore , am.
*ayvan 1ylvan
)
hen in dou!t" let it out. tailor for Bo!in
*. Blum
hen in dou!t" leave it out. ,f you have to
ask yourself" or your roommate" or your
spouse" I,s this okay to wear@J then your
answer is a defnite I7o.J ,f you are
hesitatin$ a!out it" listen to your intuition
talkin$ and pick somethin$ else. *im
6aylor" owner" 6he 6aylored +pproach
6here lives more faith in honest dou!t"
!elieve me" than in half the creeds.
+lfred =ord 6ennyson" poet
hen in dou!t" $o with the short cut.
Her!ie 6eope
,f , could only have one food for the rest of
my life@ 6hat?s easy. Pe3. Cherry Uavor Pe3.
6here?s no dou!t a!out it. Aern 6essio"
character in -tand by Me movie
hen in dou!t" use !rute force. *en
6hompson
hen in dou!t" follow the leaders.
6hompson?s Ci$ar Company newspaper ad
Faith keeps many dou!ts in her pay. ,f ,
could not dou!t" , should not !elieve.
Henry David 6horeau" essayist
hen in dou!t" $o !i$. 0ike 6ice"
foot!all coach
hen in dou!t" my dear fellow" do nothin$.
=eo 6olstoy" novelist" War and Pea)e
hen in dou!t" send plain te4t email" not
H60=. Hein3 6scha!itscher" +!out.com
email $uide
hen all else fails" manipulate the data.
69shirt sayin$
hen in dou!t in a ti$ht foot!all $ame" you
have to stretch out the !all. 6A
announcer
+s to the adjective" when in dou!t" strike it
out. 0ark 6wain" novelist
,t is !etter to keep your mouth closed and
let people think you are a fool than to open
it and remove all dou!t. 0ark 6wain"
novelist
hen in dou!t" tell the truth. 0ark
6wain" novelist
,f a person oHend you and you are in dou!t
as to whether it was intentional or not" do
not resort to e4treme measures. 1imply
watch your chance and hit him with a !rick.
0ark 6wain" novelist" Ad/i)e to #o"th
*
hen in dou!t" call them out. 6he Bule of
the Ompire
=ife is dou!t" and faith without dou!t is
nothin$ !ut death. 0i$uel De Onamuno"
philosopher
hen in dou!t" win the trick. unknown
card player
hen in dou!t" shoutG unknown
Feed your faith and dou!t will starve to
death. unknown
hen everythin$ else fails" read the
instructions. unknown
hen in dou!t" pout. unknown
hen in dou!t" ask. hen not in dou!t" ask.
unknown
hen in dou!t" $ive advice. unknown
hen in dou!t" follow your heart"
unknown
hen in dou!t" dress up. Kou just can?t $o
wron$. Chase Ontermeyer
Beliefs are what divide people. Dou!t unites
them. Peter Ostinov" actor
+
hen in dou!t" you should thank your
mother. novelist )ennifer Aander!esCs
mother
Human !ein$s are perhaps never more
fri$htenin$ than when they are convinced
!eyond dou!t that they are ri$ht.
=aurens Aan der Post" author" The Lost
World o& the Kalahari
Dou!t is not a pleasant condition" !ut
certainty is a!surd. Aoltaire" philosopher
W
First rule of a detective: hen in dou!t"
hesitate. A.,. arshawski" fctional
detective
hen in dou!t" $ive us a $ift certifcate to a
spa. hen youCre sure" $ive us a diamond
rin$. *erry ashin$ton" actress" I6en
6hin$s Kou DonCt *now +!out omenJ in
Es0"ire ma$a3ine
hen in dou!t" do the o!vious. Franklin
atts" pu!isher
hen in dou!t" talk to the union people
themselves and play upon their mercy.
Philip eintrau!
hen in dou!t" have fun with it. >rnie
ick!au$h
Focus more on your desire than on your
dou!t" and the dream will take care of itself.
Kou may !e surprised at how easily this
happens. Kour dou!ts are not as powerful as
your desires" unless you make them so.
0arcia ieder" motivational speaker and
author
ithout dou!t" success !rin$s with it
$reater opportunities for failure. Bruce
ilkinson" preacher" The Prayer o& :abe.
hen in dou!t" $o for the dick joke.
Bo!in illiams" comedian and actor
6he vain man is $enerally a dou!ter. ,t is
7ewton who sees himself as child on the
sea shore" and his discoveries in the colored
shell. illmott
hen in dou!t" !lame the server. Don
illmott" P* Maga.ine
hen in dou!t" strike it out. Pudd?nhead
ilson" character in novel !y 0ark 6wain
, am *lin$on. ,f you dou!t it" a
demonstration can !e arran$ed. =t. orf"
character in -tar Trek' The Next
%eneration 6A show
hen in dou!t" just remem!er the $olden
rule: IDo unto others as you would have
others do unto your $irlfriend as you
mastur!ate #uietly near!y.J 1tacey
Drenrock oods" se4 columnist" Es0"ire
ma$a3ine
,
hen in dou!t" take it out. *itty Bean
Kancey" editor
,f there is any dou!t in your mind" you
should plead" not $uilty. 0ajor 1inclair
Keates" character in The Irish 31M1 movie
hen in dou!t" !us. Kouth1pace.net
comment
-
6his , do know !eyond any reasona!le
dou!t. Be$ardless of what you are doin$" if
you pump lon$ enou$h" hard enou$h and
enthusiastically enou$h" sooner or later the
eHort will !rin$ forth the reward. Vi$
Vi$lar" salesman and motivational speaker
hen in dou!t" a!stain. Voroaster"
reli$ious leader and founder of
Voroastrianism
E.ilo/
,f you like the a!ove #uotations" youCll love
the other !ooks in the Ruota!le Books
series. For sample #uotations from these
!ooks" see my Ruota!le Books we!site:
http://www.quotablebooks.com.
The Art of Living: +rtists" Photo$raphers"
+rchitects" Desi$ners" Cartoonists" Poets"
riters" 7ovelists" and Critics on +rt and
=ife
The Big Bad Book of Ifs . . .
The Boob Tube uide to Life
Bumper !ticker "isdom and 2ther
Prover!s
The Business of Life: Business people and
others on life" !usiness" careers" jo!s" the
workplace" investments" economics" money"
and more
#hildren: + Ruota!le Duide for Parents
The $o%s and $on%t%s of Life
$ouble &our 'un: 6wo 6hou$hts +re
Better 6han 2ne
'ood for Thought: +ll a!out Food"
Feastin$" Diet" Drinks" and Dru$s
reatness and (umilit): 6wo sides of the
same coin
(ow to Act: +dvice on How to =ive and +ct
from +ctors" Comedians" Directors"
Producers" Playwri$hts" and 1creenwriters
It%s Time for a #hange: 6hou$hts on
Chan$e" Drowth" Pro$ress" Bisk" and
>volution
Life * $eath: ,tCs Beally a 1imple 0atter
The +aga,ine Advertiser%s uide to
!uccess in Business and =ife
The +agic of Life
The +usic of Life: 1in$ers" 0usicians"
Composers" and Dancers on =ife and 0usic
The +)riad "ebsters $ictionar): 6he
Dictionary of the People" !y the People" and
for the People
The -ever.-ever Land uide to Life
The -ever.-ever Land uide to Love
and /omance
The 0olitics of Life: 6hou$hts on life"
death" and politics from politicians"
statesmen" environmentalists" civil ri$hts
leaders" historians" economists" military
leaders" and social commentators
The /ichness of Life
The !cience of Life: 1cientists" ,nventors"
and Philosophers on the +rt and 1cience of
=ivin$
The !ecret Life of 0ets and Animals
!enior +oments: 2n Drowin$ 2lder and
iser
The !pirit of !uccess
The !port of Life: How to in in =ife and
1ports
Thanks for the +emories: 6he Bole of
Dratitude" 6hankfulness" For$iveness"
*indness" Denerosity" and Bespect in
Creatin$ a Dood =ife
Travel and (ome: +ll a!out the pleasures
of home" travel" and everywhere in !etween
The T1 Advertiser%s uide to Life
The "ar Between +en and "omen: 2n
0en" omen" 1e4" =ove" Belationships"
Datin$" 0arria$e" Divorce" and 0uch" 0uch
0ore P
Illustrated Titles
The Best Things in Life Are 'ree: 0y
Favorite Ruotations
(ow to Live &our $reams
If at 'irst &ou $on%t !ucceed2 Tr)2 Tr)
Again
If od Intended +an to !moke2 (e%d
(ave !et (im on 'ire P and 2ther
Conclusions of DodCs ork
If I (ad +) Life to Live 3ver . . .
The +iracle of Life
0la)ing the 0ercentages: =ies" Damned
Funny =ies" 1tatistics" and >verythin$ in
Between
"hen in $oubt2 4iss the 'ish +nd
2ther >4tremely ise +dvice
5oke #ollections
The Big Bad Book of Blonde 5okes
+other.in.Law: 6he 0other of +ll )oke
Books

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