Running Head: ERIKSON SELF STUDY

Erikson Self Study

Child & Adolescent Development 121-11F
Ivy Tech College
Nancy Rice

ERIKSON SELF STUDY

Erik Erikson had a theory that our identity is never solved once and for all. That we all go
through stages and as we go through these stages we are shaped by how we are treated, how we
react to the treatment and care we receive, as well as what we learn from the process of each
stage. How we change our conception of ourselves over a lifetime is one of the most intriguing
questions in psychology, because identity- who or what we know ourselves to be, or at least what
we hope we are- is so fundamental. (Butler-Bowson, 2007, p. 88)
Erikson grew up in Germany as Erik Homberger he was the result of an affair between his
Jewish mother and an unknown man. He was not accepted at school because he was Jewish and
he was not accepted in his church community because his looks were tall blonde and blue-eyed
definitely not what a Jewish person would have typically looked like. When he was in his early
30 he became an American citizen and took the name Erik Erikson that is son of himself
(Butler-Bowson, 2007, p. 85)
It is no wonder since he never quite fit in that he was concerned about the question of who am
I? Eriksons theory is that the question of who am I? will come up many times in a persons
life. (Butler-Bowson, 2007, p. 85) In Eriksons eight steps theory one experiences an identity
crisis at each stage and it is each person who chooses growth or stagnation at each level. Each
choice is a corner stone for the next stage. If one has a failure in one stage it does not mean that
the next stage will automatically be a failure as well however it will intensify the next crisis one
has to go through. As long as the crisis can be faced eventually it is not truly a failure.
(ATALAY, 2007, pp. 16,17)

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The eight stages are: Trust vs. Mistrust, Autonomy vs. Shame and Doubt, Initiative vs. Guilt,
Industry vs. Inferiority. Identity vs. Role Confusion, Intimacy vs. Isolation, Generativety vs.
Stagnation, and Ego Integrity vs. Despair.
I am writing this paper to reflect on my understanding and also reflecting on my own
development. I will give a brief description of each of the eight stages my understanding of the
stage and what my personal experience is with that stage. I have a unique view point as not only
do I have my own upbringing but the way I cared for my own children and how that has affected
them as well. By reflecting on Eriksons theory and how it relates personally to me it will help
me as I am teaching to understand not only my role in each students life but understand some of
the behavior I will see coming from students, and their families. It will help me not make rash
opinions and to encourage growth for my students and their families in a positive manner. By
understanding this theory I will be able to help facilitate development in the stages that are
relevant to each individual. I may be able to help students family members in areas that they
perhaps did not positively get a stage met in their lives so that my students can have healthier
home lives and become more able to learn efficiently if their needs can be met better at home.

STAGE 1: TRUST vs. MISTRUST

This stage should be addressed early in infancy.0-1 year old. The virtue to be gained from this
stage is hope. (Dewey, 2007) It is a basic theory when viewed at a glance of if a childs needs
are met they will develop trust, however if one looks closer at this stage you will find research
done that it is trust or mistrust develop between each caretaker the infant has. (ATALAY, 2007)

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My understanding of this stage is: The needs of an infant are extensive for caregivers to provide
when you really think about it. Infants need to be taken total care of they are unable to do
anything for themselves. They must be fed every 1-2 hours for the first month. The diapering
needs are average 9 wet diapers and 3 poopy ones per day. They cry when they are hungry, and
when they have soiled a diaper. They cry when they are uncomfortable in any way. They cry
when they are tired.
DISCRIPTION OF STAGE 1 IN MY LIFE: I can say that my parents took great care of me. My
mom showed me how to take care of my children too. One never can understand why parents can
go through such extreme exhaustion until one has experienced it for themselves. I know that my
own children could even keep me awake when they slept because they whimpered even in sleep
or made some kind of noises that kept me pretty alert for the first month of their life. There were
many times at 2 and 3 in the morning I was crying just as hard as they were because of my
exhaustion.
STAGE 2: AUTONOMY vs. SHAME AND DOUBT
Stage two covers early childhood from the ages of 1-3 years of age. The virtue to be gained from
this stage is will. (Dewey, 2007) It introduces the concept of autonomy versus shame and doubt.
In this anal-urethral and muscular stage, the endeavor of the child to gain control over the anal
zone is the main issue of focus. (ATALAY, 2007)
My understanding of this stage is: When toddlers start potty training this is a time in a childs life
when he/she needs to taught with patience and understanding. When starting potty training make
sure that the child is actually ready and control the needed muscles. This will help in the child
have a successful attempt at this goal. If the child has not gained control of the proper set of

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muscles then it will only frustrate the child and the caregiver. If child and caregiver can get
through this time with as little stress the better it is on both.
DISCRIPTION OF STAGE 2 IN MY LIFE I can remember very little about this stage of my life
I do know that I was potty trained I do not think there was any issues. I was the last of four
children so my mom was used to potty training children. She said that I picked it up pretty fast. I
did have an issue with night time. I was such a small person that my bladder probably was not
big enough. My experience with my own children varied child from child but the basics were the
same. My oldest was the easiest I did try to start too early when I realized this I decided to wait a
few weeks and then she picked it up quickly and had a few accidents but that is expected. My
second child is a little stubborn so with her it was a control issue so when she had an accident I
did not make a big deal of because she enjoyed the attention she got when she would purposely
had a mishap. When I realized that was what the issue was and stopped making a fuss the
accidents stopped. With my last child I had the hardest time ever. First everyone had always
said how much easier boys were to train. I had my sights set on an easy experience; Boy was in
for a rude awakening. With what I know and reflecting back I feel so bad about the way Harrys
potty training went. My son had a horrible time getting trained. First I did not know that he was
a special needs child until he was five. So when he had a hard time I did not understand so I am
embarrassed to say that I did not handle it well. We were both frustrated and had many instances
where we were both very upset. He did not get all the way trained till he was over 5 years old.
Looking back I now realize that he has several diagnosed issues and I should have been a lot
more patient and not have been as expectant on other peoples experiences to translate to a great
and easy time. One thing I have learned is that patience is rarely regretted anger is almost always
regretted and cannot be erased.

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STAGE 3 INITIATIVE vs. GUILT
This stage covers the ages 3-6. The virtue to be gained from this stage is purpose. (Dewey, 2007)
In this stage the child is able to play imagine things, there sometimes is situations where girls
identify more with their dads and boys identify more with their moms. There are times where the
child develops closeness with parent of same sex and that may cause a crisis. The challenge
comes in the understanding or miss-understanding language and actions. (ATALAY, 2007)
My understanding of this stage is: A child will develop and act out things they have seen and
learned. This is a time when a child starts to identify in some way with adults they want to be
like adults in their life or from movies or TV shows. They will imagine all sorts of things and act
them out some will be true some will not be true to life. During this stage a child starts to see
they have a purpose in life and try to figure out what they want to do when they grow up. This
will change many times one day a child may want to be a ballerina and the next moment they
may want to be a wrestler. During this stage they will start to develop humor empathy and
resilience. (Dewey, 2007)
DISCRIPTION OF STAGE 3 IN MY LIFE my experience with this stage the part that took
place at home was safe and secure I loved helping both my mom and dad and my older siblings.
I wanted to be doing whatever my dad and brothers were doing. I worked in the garage. I helped
them work on cars and bicycles. I loved to hand them tools and be right there with them. I also
loved going shopping with my mom and sister too. I was the youngest of four children and my
youngest sibling was seven years older than I and that was my brother Mike. I had another
brother Rob who is eight years older than I. My sister is ten years older than I. My home was a
place where I could play and explore and inside and outside of the house. I had a great child

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hood at home. Then I started school and I have never figured out but I was just not accepted by
my peers. I was made fun of and teased and avoided by most of the children. I do not know how
or why this happened. My experience with my children in this area is that all three of my
children got through this stage beautifully their peers accepted them at this age and they were
working through imagination and play situations each at their own pace and with their own
interests. My oldest loved her place in the family and took full advantage of being the oldest and
was defiantly the boss. Katie my middle child would on occasion figure out ways to out fox her
big sister and did so with great joy. Harrison my special needs child like to play alone for the
most part but would be in his own world he did enjoy making his classmates laugh and made
friends in that manner. He may get through the stages a little slower than my daughters but he
does make progress just at his own pace.
STAGE 4 INDUSTRY vs. IFERIORTY
This stage covers the ages from six to twelve. The virtue to gain from this stage is competence.
(Dewey, 2007) This is school age for children and they gain so much from school and not just
what happens in the classroom they are learning how to make friends. Teachers become a big
part of the childs daily life. (ATALAY, 2007) Their friends become very important as well they
are spending a lot of time out of the home and with others. They are learning how to act in the
world. They are also learning responsibility at home with chores.
My understanding of this stage is that children are learning to be industrious during these ages
and they will work on many different things. Their lives become busy and more structured.
Children learn from daily activities how to accomplish things. They are learning how to fit in
with people outside their family and how to get along with children and adults daily. A lot of this

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will be from trial and error so when a child does make a mistake it is important to guide them in
the right direction without criticizing them too much. Let them know how he/she can act in an
acceptable manner, and then praise them for good behavior.
DISCRIPTION OF STAGE 4 IN MY LIFE my experience with this stage was not a pleasant
one. My school experience did not encourage me in a positive manner. I never did fit in with my
peers during elementary school. I did have good teachers and I was an O.K. student but I did not
always grasp what was being taught with ease. I had major struggles in math and multiplication
and division areas. Reading was always easy because I was taught to love books at an early age.
I had virtually no social skills that hindered me in the area of making friends. I remember people
walking up asking me if I wanted to be friends and when I said yes happily they laughed and
walked away. I had no idea on how to make friends. People started to take great joy in hurting
my feelings and making me the butt of their jokes I was an easy target I suppose and was
innocent and did not understand a lot of the sexual terms they giggled about. I had no clue. So I
was the outsider. I have felt inferior most of my life due to this and work harder than I should to
be accepted and care too much about how others think of me. My experience with my children in
this stage is varied just like with any stage. My oldest had several friends in her class was well
liked by most everyone. She was also very conscious of what she wore and how she acted at
school or in public. My middle child developed friendships with a select few people around her
she is shy and so her people skills are not vast either but she did have friends at this age.
Harrison did not have a lot of friends at this age he has had one good friend since first grade they
both are special needs and both like the same thing (video games).

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STAGE 5 IDENTIY vs. CONFUSION
This stage covers ages twelve through nineteen. The virtue to be gained of this stage is fidelity.
(Dewey, 2007) This stage is the one in which the adolescent enthusiastically tries to find an
identity that he/she can embrace; and thus the first identity crisis emerges. Teenage love is a way
that individuals try to find who they are and what they hope others see in them. (ATALAY,
2007) He/she will go through this process until the individual finds a life style they can maintain
and accept.
My understanding of this stage is that it is vital for individuals to go through this process and to
choose a lifestyle wisely. Teens must go through this stage and it is important for them to have
freedom to choose and experiment. The adults and mentors in the lives of the teenager at this
stage are important resources. They can guide and set good examples and provide advice. In the
end it is the teen that makes the choices. He/she will make good and bad choices. By making
these choices he/she will learn who they want to be and how they want to live.
DISCRIPTION OF STAGE 5 IN MY LIFE: when I was a teenager I made good and bad
choices. I did not always do the right thing. I did some things that I am very ashamed of
including: shoplifting, and smoking cigarettes. Thankfully I did not adapt to lifestyles or do
them very much. I felt so bad about shoplifting and smoking; I confessed to my religious leader
and repented. I dated a lot of boys mostly those I met at church daces but some I met in school. I
did not play the field I went with one boy till an argument came up and then we would usually
break up and part ways not as friends but enemies. I was in a two relationships that lasted over a
year. They ended and I was heartbroken both times but the last one really broke me I had been in
an abusive relationship and I had been sexually active for the first time. I felt used and trapped

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but better to be trapped than used and unwanted by anyone else. I cried for weeks when I had
finally gotten the courage to leave him the first time. I took him back because of my low selfesteem but it was destined to fail. I broke up with him again and this time I did not cry I was
done. I had come through though and I knew how I wanted to be treated, and I knew how I
should be loved deep inside. The values that had been instilled in me through the adults who had
so much better judgment than I did at that time stuck in my heart and gave me the courage I
needed to stand up for what was right for myself and not believe the person who was my abuser.
My parents had no idea what I had been through he did not ever hurt me where they could see
and I never told them. As for my experience with my children and this stage my oldest had
boyfriends and one of them she freaked out bad when they broke up so I knew because even
though I did not act like she did when it happened outwardly it was what I had felt like on the
inside. Because I had been through that and knew the pain and fear of feeling used and angry
with myself I could help her in ways my mom could not have helped me. My younger children
have crushes but have not acted on them as of yet they have been to dances and had some
experience with some romantic feelings on a small level but they are still too shy to start
developing relationships as of yet.
STAGE 6 INTIMACY vs. ISOLATION
This stage covers ages from twenty through twenty-five. The virtue that can be gained in this
stage is love. (Dewey, 2007) Intimacy is not only meaning sexual intimacy. Sexual intimacy is
only a part of true and mutual psychological intimacy that can develop between two people.
(ATALAY, 2007) Psychological intimacy is stronger and more stable than sexual intimacy. The
challenge is does the individual have the confidence of self that it takes to develop this kind of

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intimacy. To know who one is and have ones own values is imperative to be successful in this
stage.
My understanding of this stage is that one must have a good idea of who one is to develop and
sustain emotional intimacy. One must be able to hold to ones values and beliefs while
developing this emotional intimacy and offer opinions and stand strong in relationships without
compromising or loosening sight of ones identity. It is best to find someone with same values
that one has and the same goals it is near to impossible to sustain this deep emotional intimacy
when trying to move in opposite directions,
DISCRIPTION OF STAGE 6 IN MY LIFE: I met my the man who is my husband that I love
dearly on a blind date not too long after I had broken up the second time with the guy who
abused me. I had told myself I will go out with Gordon but I would not feel anything for him.
My heart had other plans for me. I was drawn to him and he to I. He had not wanted a
relationship at the time either. We had the same values and goals. He is a kind gentle man who
won my heart. It was not easy path for him for I was so suspicious and had a lot of baggage. We
all have baggage but how long we carry it varies. Some baggage is easier to drop than others. He
patiently went through each piece of my baggage with me and was transparent about all his
actions and feelings as my life was still in turmoil from my past. He had baggage too that we
worked through together. We were in love and got married when I was 20 we are still married
and have a great relationship to this day. We treat each other with kindness love and respect. My
childrens experience with this stage is just now beginning for my oldest so that is not a topic I
can discuss further at this point.

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STAGE 7 GENERATIVITY vs. STAGNATION
This stage covers ages twenty-six through sixty-four. The virtue to be gained in this stage is
care. (Dewey, 2007) People are learning as well as teaching animals dependency and maturities
are reciprocal. In other words, maturity, which is usually established in this stage of adulthood,
depends and leads to concern and care for others, specifically for the next generation.
(ATALAY, 2007)
My understanding of this stage is that a person had learned and is now teaching their children or
children in his/her life the things they have learned in the stages that they have been through.
There are always younger people in ones life and they need the guidance and understanding of
someone who has already been through the stage. By helping the next generation through these
stages one finds purpose and fulfillment.
DISCRIPTION OF STAGE 7 IN MY LIFE: my experience with this stage is I am in the middle
of this one. I have had three beautiful great children taught them values and guided them as much
as I am able to do. My youngest is fourteen and he will in a few years be self-dependent, I hope.
I worked menial jobs and the work I did in these jobs damaged my hands. The damage cannot be
repaired. My body is not a strong one. I have several health issues and battle them constantly. I
am not ready to sit home and mark days, weeks and years off the calendar. I am not qualified at
the present to gainfully support myself. So I decided to go to school and learn and get qualified
in an area that I love so that I will be eventually be able to have gainful employment. I love
helping others and I love children. I have a special bond with special needs children and enjoy
working with them. I have lots of experience with my son who now has diagnosis of ADHD,
Aspergers, Sensory Processing Disorder, and Dysgraphia. I watched the teachers at my sons

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school struggle in how to help him. I know that if I complete my goal of becoming a special
needs teacher I will be able to help children and families to understand good strategies to work
around the disability and show the world the beautiful person inside. I think I am in full swing of
this stage and embracing it with all that is in me.
STAGE 8 INTEGRITY vs. DESPAIR
This stage covers ages sixty-five and up. The virtue to be gained in this stage is wisdom.
(Dewey, 2007) The final stage, which is also the last one of the three stages of adulthood,
covers old age and introduces the concept of ego integrity versus despair (ATALAY, 2007)
My understanding of this stage is at 65 one has reached the age where one is entering what is
called by society the golden years. During this stage one looks back at ones life and places value
on accomplishments and regret on short-comings.
DISCRIPTION OF STAGE 8 IN MY LIFE: I hope to be in a place where there will be a lot
more accomplishments in my life than regrets. We all have some regrets but so far mine are few.
I have made lots of mistakes but they have shaped who I am and so I do not regret most of them
because without my mistakes I would never learn or grow. Regrets are for me things that I have
not done and perhaps some of the anger issues I have had and the way that I hold grudges. I am
still at a point now that I understand this and hopefully will not make more regrets in these areas.
I hope that I will be able to look back on my life and find great things to reflect on. I pray I make
wise choices and help others around me to do the same.
In conclusion one goes through these stages it may not be at the ages that are listed people are
not cookies to be shaped and cut out the same shape and the same way as everyone else in the
world. We are instead a world of individuals having experiences that may be similar but never

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the same. We all learn differently think differently and have different perceptions. The stages are
a great guide and ballpark starting area but each stage could be broken down further and some go
through identity crises at times that may not line up exactly with Eriksons stages. Also we could
go through these stages in jobs or college or relationships. These stages can be used and adapted
to fit into multiple categories we as humans go through in our lives the question of who am I ? Is
a question that can never be fully answered once and for all for it changes day to day and
moment by moment? We are shaping who we become and who the ones we influence become.

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Works Cited
ATALAY, M. (2007). Psychology of Crisis: An Overall Account of Psychology of Erikson. Ekev Academic
Review.
Butler-Bowson, T. (2007). 50 Psychology Classics: Who We Are, How We Think, What We Do;Insght and
Inspiration from 50 key books. Nicholas Brealey Publishing.
Capps, D. (2004). The Decades of Life : relcocating Erikson's Stages. Pastoral Psychology, 3-32.
Dewey, R. (2007). Erikson's Psychosocial Stages. Retrieved from Psych Web:
http://www.intropsych.com/ch11_personality/eriksons_psychosocial_stages.html
Goldberger, L., & Wallerstein , R. S. (2000). Ideas and identities: The life work of Erik Erikson.
Psychoanalytic Psychology, 437-442.
Studer, J. R. (2007). Erik Erikson's Psychosocial Stages Applied to Supervision. Guidance & Counseling,
168-173.

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