A Framework For Understanding Poverty: A Cognitive Approach

Ruby Payne
Chapter 3
Hidden Rules Among Classes: How They Impact Relationships with People Different
from You
I.

Hidden Rules
The unspoken cues and habits of a group. Can be distinct among different
groups and economic classes.
Develop from ones situated-learning environment and are learned both by
being in that environment and by being taught.
Social learning when one parent came from poverty and the other from
middle class, then the set of rules are mixed.

II.

Bottom Line
In generational poverty the bottom line is entertainment and relationships.
Middle Class: The criteria against which most decisions are made relate
to work and achievement.
Upper Class: The criteria against which most decisions are made relate to
ramifications of the financial, social, and political connections that have
the weight.
**The social rich can be distinguished from the merely rich and those
below through their schooling and the education routine that leads
throughout their lives. Example: Private school.

III.

Differentiation Among Classes

How the world is defined for them.
Wealthy individuals view the international scene as their world. In wealth,
to be introduced or accepted, one must have an individual already
approved by that group make introductions.
Middle class tends to see the world in terms of a national picture. To stand
back and introduce yourself in a middle-class setting is not the accepted
norm.
Poverty sees the world in its immediate locale. It isnt unusual to have a
comment made about the person before he/she is ever introduced.

IV.

Key Points
Hidden rules govern a great deal of our immediate assessment of an
individual and his/her capabilities.
Not understanding the hidden rules of the next class is the key factor in
keeping an individual from moving upward.
In relationships, often times things dont work out because one person
breaks a hidden rule and the other person then assumes the rule breaker is
rude or incompetent. In reality, not everyone is familiar with hidden rules.

V.

Many people who are brought up in the middle class take to following a
number of the hidden rules of poverty. Many different factors including:
early pregnancy, drug/biochemical/addiction issues, learning disabilities,
abuse, and social isolation can impact an individuals choice to follow
certain hidden rules.

Hidden Rules in the School or Work Setting

Students need to be taught the hidden rules of the middle class so that this
set of rules can be utilized if they so choose.
Any attitudes that students and parents bring with them are an integral part
of their culture and/or belief system. In many cases other conclusions can
be reached without the immediate implementation of middle class
solutions.
The more you understand this information, the less frustration it will cause
you when dealing with a variety of students and parents.
Dont make it a point to label someone as a member of a certain class.
Many who are poor dont believe they are poor. Those who are rich tend
to cite someone who has even more than they do.