702 SQUADRON Mess Dinner Etiquette and Activity Guide

Foreword
A mess dinner can be a great activity for socializing and practicing social skills.
A mess dinner is an unusual mixture of ceremony and social activities. The purposes of mess dinner are for camaraderie,
friendship, learning and fun!
The dress for a mess dinner is usually as dignified as possible. In the Canadian Forces, all officers and most WOs and Sgts
have a Mess Kit, a uniform used only at mess functions and social functions. The Sea
Sea,, Land and Air elements have a
different mess kit. In the Army, many units have their own mess kit. Mess kits are usually very colourful and very
expensive.
At cadet mess dinners, the normal Cadet uniform is upgraded to a white shirt and black bow tie for
f the occasion. This is
true for Officers as well as Cadets. If a cadet has a white shirt and bow tie, they should be worn. The regular uniform is
acceptable however. If a Cadet orr guest does not have a uniform, the usual dress is jacket and tie for gentleman and
gown for ladies. Medals and decorations
ecorations are always worn at me
mess dinners.
Mess dinners have special customs. Toasts,, military music, specific seating, guest speakers and rules of behaviour are
only a few examples that make mess
ess dinners differ
different.
A mess d1nner is an
n occasion where everyone must ttake special care to act properly. Special care is needed and must
be taken in order to never embarrass a squadron member or guest at the dinner.

Roles
Role of the Squadron CO
The CO is the host for the event. The CO will ensure that the gue
guest(s) of honour are hosted properly.
prop
The CO may, from
time to time ask the PMC
C to make announcements, etc.
Role of the PMC
The President of the Mess Committee (PMC)
PMC) is traditionally the Manager of the mess dinner.
inner. The PMC sits at the far
right hand of the head table or in a place of prominence so that as much of the room can be seen. The PMC announces
certain activities and generally, ensures that every member acts properly.
If a Squadron member or guest wants
ts to do or say something, the PMC must authorize the action. You can get the
attention of the PMC byy raising your hand or by standi
standing at your place at the table. It is wise to bring a pad and a
pencil/pen to write a note to the PMC should you wants tto do something during the dinner.
Role of Squadron members
The squadron
n members attend a mess dinner to enjoy them
themselves. It is the responsibility of each one of us to ensure
that guests are not ignored and have a good time as well.

Role of Squadron Staff members

The squadron staff members also attend a mess dinner to enjoy themselves. Staff members are there as role models for
Cadets as well.

What should not be done at a Mess Dinner?

A Mess, in our case, The 602 Lynx Wing, is a location where Air Force Officers, (because this is an Air Force Association
Mess) go for meals and social events. The 602 Lynx Wing Royal Canadian Air Force Association allows 702 Squadron to
use their facilities. We must take utmost care to ensure that they will not regret allowing us to use their Mess.
In order to ensure that we are allowed to use this mess in the future, there are some ground rules that must be
followed.
Furniture and other Mess property: do not stand on tables or chairs for any reason.
It is not polite to handle decorations and objects that are on display.
Candles: do not play with candles. There is danger of fire and it is almost impossible to get candle wax off of
uniforms, table cloths, furniture, etc.
Food: never play with or throw food. As well as displaying horrible table manners, throwing food can soil
uniforms and the facilities. Food on the floor is also a slipping hazard.
Mess staff: always be polite and courteous with mess staff.
Voice: Voice levels at Mess dinners can get rather loud but yelling and other rude noises are very bad manners
and will not be allowed.
Cell Phones, Pagers, Radios and other types of music devices: Electronic devices are usually forbidden at mess
dinners. NOTE: If you have a valid reason to have one with you and turned on, discuss it with the PMC or the
CO before the start of the dinner.

What should be done at a Mess Dinner

Before, during and after dinner,
Never wear headdress (Wedge, hat, toque, beret, etc] in a mess, except on arrival and departure. Outdoor
clothing must always he removed before entering either the, lounge or the dining room.
Squadron members must ensure that guests are well received and included in the gathering. No guest should
he allowed to be alone or be ignored. Younger or newer squadron members must not be ignored or left alone.
This is mostly the responsibility of senior cadets but all members of the Squadron share in this responsibility.
When dinner is announced, sometimes by a bugler, sometimes by a piper, the participants move to the dining
room and find their place in the dining room. The Head Table guests enter a few minutes later and the dinner
begins, usually with Grace. Consult the seating plan posted in the lower lounge before dinner to find your place
in the dining room. All participants should be on their best behaviour. Table manners are very noticeable.

At the table
If you do not know which knife or which fork to use, ask someone or at least look to see what others are doing.
If you do not like one of the items served to you, you do not have to eat it.
If you would like something, for example another bun or another napkin, you can ask the server to get you one.
You will not get extra helpings of the main course or salads or deserts; do not: ask for them.
If you do not, know what to do, ask someone. There will be seniors and staff members seated all around you.
It is wise to use the washroom a few minutes before the participants actually get to the dining room and also
wise not to drink a lot before going to the dining room.
Spills, stains and accidents do happen, even when everyone is careful. In such a case, ask the servers to get you
wet cloths. If it is a major spill, for example, a bowl of soup on your lap, ask the PMC to be excused and go to
the washroom to clean up. Get another cadet or a senior or staff member to go with you to help.
If you should have a health emergency during the dinner, by all means leave the table and do go the washroom.
If it is a serious health emergency, alert a senior or a staff member before leaving the table.
It is expected that participants will rise when certain music is played; the National Anthem., God Save the
Queen, the Air Force March and any other such music. If there are foreign guests, it is usual to play the National
Anthem of their country as well. lf there are members of another service present, for example the Navy or the
Army, the Navy March or Regimental Marches may also be played.
At the appropriate lime, when dishes have been removed from tables, the port (fruit juice for a Cadet dinner)
will be passed. Traditionally, the decanter should not be put down but passed from one to the other. When all
glasses have been filled, the PMC will ask the Vice PMC to do the "Loyal Toast" to our Head of State, the Queen
of Canada. The toast will be said in both National Languages.
o The PMC will say, "Mr. Vice, The Queen. Monsieur le vice prsident, La Reine."
o The Vice will rise and say, "Ladies and Gentlemen, The Queen of Canada. Mesdames et Messieurs, La
Reine du Canada."
o Participants will rise, prck up their glass and raise it and say, "The Queen" or" La Reine" and drink to her
health. Participants will then sit down.
o If there are guests from foreign countries at the mess dinner, the PMC will propose a toast to the Head
of State of those foreign countries. For example: "Ladies and Gentlemen, the President of the Unites
States of America. Mesdames et Messieurs, Le President des EtatsUnis dAmrique." or, "Ladies and
Gentlemen, his Royal Highness, the Prince of Monaco. Mesdames et Messieurs, son Altesse royal, Le
Prince de Monaco."
After these official toasts, there may be other toasts directed by the PMC. When these toasts are concluded,
the PMC may ask the head table guests to offer some toasts. The PMC may then offer the participants to offer
toasts.
After the meal
When dinner is concluded, the Head Table quests march out of the dining room and a few moments later, the
participants leave the dining room as well and go to the lower lounge.
Always stop speaking when the CO or the PMC speak. Always listen politely during the after dinner speeches.
These are usually given in the lower lounge so that the servers can clean the dining room.
Departure time
At the end of the evening, if you leave before the CO, always take a moment to go say good night to her/him
before putting on your outdoor clothing to leave.
What can be done at a Mess Dinner?
Many things can he done during a mess dinner.
Discussions, storytelling, , and sharing; experiences

Participants are usually distributed fairly evenly around the dining room in order to avoid clusters of old
friends who can have their own private party and exclude all others around them. This provides a great
opportunity to meet new people and to possibly make new friends. Always ensure that the participant
to your left or right is not ignored because the person on your other side or in front of you seems much
more interesting.

Toasts
After the Loyal toast and the other official toasts, lf the PMC Offers the chance to participants to offer a toast,
they can ask the permission to do so.
There are often good reasons to toast persons, organizations and the like.
The participant stands at his place and asks the PMC for permission to offer a toast, for example. "to a great
bunch of people who support this Squadron." The PMC will say "yes" or "no". If it is "no", there should be NO
discussion. If it is "yes", the participant may carry on.
Example:
"Mr. PMC, I would like to propose a toast to a group of people, without whom, this Squadron could not
function. Ladies and Gentlemen, would you rise and drink with me, to the parents of all the cadets in the
squadron."
Participants rise.
The participant says, "To the parents of 702 Squadron."
Members raise their glasses and say, "to the parents." and drink to the health.
Participants will then sit down.
`
NOTE. It is usually the older participants who will offer toasts, not the newer members. Newer members are not
usually familiar enough with habits and customs of social functions to do this properly.
Requests i.e. illness, spills, etc.
A participant can make a request of PMC simply by standing up at his/her place. The PMC will ask you why you
are standing.
The PMC cannot always see everyone clearly and the sound level prevents hearing unless someone shouts.
Example:
Cadet Bloggins: Stands at his place.
PMC: Wraps the gavel to quiet others and asks what the Cadet wants.
Cadet Blogins: "Not; feeling well Sir, permission to leave the table."
PMC: "Yes. Carry on.
Conclusion
Mess dinners are among the most interesting social activities that the Military has to offer. It should be a memorable
experience for everyone.
In order for this to happen, all participants must ensure that each other participant has a memorable experience as well.
This will occur to the extent that the senior cadets assume responsibility for newer Cadets who are around or near them
during the dinner and ensure that they fell included.