Reuben 1

Ashley Reuben
John Kubler
English 115
10/14/14

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Ethnography
OBSERVATION: We are at sugar fish restaurant in the Calabasas Commons. Ive known
Nicole, the woman in the relationship, since I was about a year old. I met Mikey, the man in the
relationship, when him and Nicole started dating. They have been dating for three years. I am
sitting next to Nicole and Mikey is sitting across from us. We mostly had conversations all together. When they did have conversations I would notice that he would always let her have the
last word. I know from hanging out with them previously that Nicole is the dominant one in this
relationship. He would never argue with her, and he would usually just listen to what she says.
When it comes to thinking about who's more in love in this relationship I think it gets complicated. He shows that the loves her more, but I know that she loves him a lot also. Nicole just
doesnt show it in front of other people. Mikey on the other hand, has no problem letting the
whole world how much he loves Nicole. I think that Nicole is just a more private person. After I
interviewed them, I realized that I was right and Nicole is the more dominant one in the relationship.
INTERVIEW (FIRST COUPLE): (Icebreakers)
1. What city do you live in? Do you room together or live separately?
Boy: I live in Los Angeles

Reuben 2
Girl: I live in Encino
2. How much time do you spend together each day? On the weekends?
Boy: Four times a week, and an average of three hours every time.
3. Where do you usually go for a romantic night out, or just to have fun on weekends?
Boy: On the weekends, we go to places with out friends, date nights we do sushi
restaurants and ice cream.
(Attempt to discover their Power-Dynamics: who is Dominant):
4. Who usually decides where to go for the dates?
Boy: Me.
Girl: Its equal.
5. In the beginning of your relationship, who made the first move to break the ice and start the
dating relationship?
Girl: He did
6. What did that person do to get the other person to take interest and agree to go out?
Boy: I continuously tried proving myself and my worth to her.
7. Who do you think is more dominant in your relationship? (a blunt question yes, but if you
have relaxed the couple, most times they will feel comfortable answering).
Boy: Im going to go ahead and exercise my 5th amendment.
Girl: That means me.
Boy: Sure babe, its her.
(Attempt to discover the correlation to Female Gender Equality):

Reuben 3
8. Should collegiate female track athletes be allowed to race on the mens track team? In the
Olympics? Why?
Boy: No, males bodies are made different, and the amount of muscle max a male has will
over power the females muscle mass and make an unfair race.
Girl: Well, you have to be able to go a certain speed to be a part of it, so if a girl can go
just as fast as the guys why not.
9. Do you agree with the new US militarys decision to let women fight side-by-side with the
men in the armys infantry combat forces? Why?
Boy: Yes, the ability to aim a gun and follow orders has nothing to do with male or
female.
Girl: If they see that the women can do just as well as the women during training then
sure.
(Attempt to discover the correlation to attitudes towards Sexuality):
10. Would you be in favor of letting women go topless on Los Angeles beaches?
Boy: No
Girl: No, never.
11. Do you know who the singers Miley Cyrus and Nicki Minaj are? (SHOW THE PHOTOS
OF THE PERFORMERS) Have you ever seen any of their videos or live performances? If so,
do you think their sexual exhibitionism in performances is going too far? Why or why not?
Boy: Absolutely. Theyre not role models like they were before.

Reuben 4
Girl: I think so, it is corrupting little childrens minds, so many little kids look up to
Miley Cyrus and they dont know that what she is doing is bad, so they think its okay to
be like her.
12. Do you think female high school students should be allowed to wear these short cutoff shorts
to school? (SHOW PHOTO OF THE GIRL)
Girl: Yes, as long as their butt cheek isnt falling out.
Boy: I agree.
13. Should prostitution be legalized in Los Angeles?
Girl: No! Do you want horny guys to go cheat on their wives?
Boy: No, prostitution shouldnt be legal anywhere, it is a quick way to spread disease, get
an abortion, and make dirty money.
14. On a date, if a girl wears a short, tight-fitting microskirt to a dance club or party, do you think
shes degrading herself and becoming nothing more than a sexual object? (SHOW PHOTO OF
THE GIRL)
Boy: Yes, those girls are looking for attention and are inviting you to see how easy it is
to get it. Its like a deer with a big X on their skin while guys are hunting.
Girl: No, I just think that thats what she is comfortable wearing, as long as it is not too
short to the point where it is showing her private areas.
15. If a female college student wears the same microskirt to a college party, is she presenting
herself as a sexual object?
Both: Same answer as before.
(Overall Secret to Lasting Relationships):

Reuben 5
16. What makes true love possible in your relationship today?
Both: Patience, trust, honesty, comfort, and knowing when to do/say the appropriate
things for the appropriate times.
Then, show them a full color copy of the ad that your group chose to perform; ask both of the
partners who they believe the characters are, what they think the dramatic story behind the ad is,
and who they think is more in control of the gendered relationship depicted in the Ad. Note their
responses in your mind.
The girl thought that they had a threesome. The boy said that the guy in the green and the
hot lady are having an affair and interfering in an abusive and emotionally taxing
relationship between the guy in the blue and the hot lady. Both agreed that the woman is
in control.
SECOND COUPLE:
(Icebreakers)
1. What city do you live in? Do you room together or live separately?
Girl: We live on campus but we dont live together.
2. How much time do you spend together each day? On the weekends?
Girl: We try to see each other for a little every day, we hang out on the weekends more.
3. Where do you usually go for a romantic night out, or just to have fun on weekends?
Boy: We go out to dinner a lot.
(Attempt to discover their Power-Dynamics: who is Dominant):
4. Who usually decides where to go for the dates?
Girl: We take turns on picking where to go.

Reuben 6
5. In the beginning of your relationship, who made the first move to break the ice and start the
dating relationship?
Boy: I did.
6. What did that person do to get the other person to take interest and agree to go out?
Girl: He asked me for my number, and we started texting and eventually he asked me out.
7. Who do you think is more dominant in your relationship? (a blunt question yes, but if you
have relaxed the couple, most times they will feel comfortable answering).
Both: Its equal.
(Attempt to discover the correlation to Female Gender Equality):
8. Should collegiate female track athletes be allowed to race on the mens track team? In the
Olympics? Why?
Both: Yeah why not.
9. Do you agree with the new US militarys decision to let women fight side-by-side with the
men in the armys infantry combat forces? Why?
Both: Yeah, it doesnt have anything to do with being a man or a woman.
(Attempt to discover the correlation to attitudes towards Sexuality):
10. Would you be in favor of letting women go topless on Los Angeles beaches?
Both: No.
11. Do you know who the singers Miley Cyrus and Nicki Minaj are? (SHOW THE PHOTOS
OF THE PERFORMERS) Have you ever seen any of their videos or live performances? If so,
do you think their sexual exhibitionism in performances is going too far? Why or why not?
Both agreed: Its a little disturbing to see but maybe they're just trying to be themselves.

Reuben 7
12. Do you think female high school students should be allowed to wear these short cutoff shorts
to school? (SHOW PHOTO OF THE GIRL)
Girl: Yeah, I wear them all the time.
Boy: I wouldnt mind it.
13. Should prostitution be legalized in Los Angeles?
Both: No
14. On a date, if a girl wears a short, tight-fitting microskirt to a dance club or party, do you think
shes degrading herself and becoming nothing more than a sexual object? (SHOW PHOTO OF
THE GIRL)
Girl: No, they can wear whatever they want.
Boy: I think it depends on who's wearing it.
15. If a female college student wears the same microskirt to a college party, is she presenting
herself as a sexual object?
Girl: No.
Boy: Again I just think it depends on whos wearing it.
(Overall Secret to Lasting Relationships):
16. What makes true love possible in your relationship today?
Both agreed: Communication is a big part of it.
Then, show them a full color copy of the ad that your group chose to perform; ask both of the
partners who they believe the characters are, what they think the dramatic story behind the ad is,
and who they think is more in control of the gendered relationship depicted in the Ad. Note their
responses in your mind.

Reuben 8
They both thought that the girl was in control and trying to seduce the man in the blue,
they thought that the man in the green was irrelevant.

!
THIRD COUPLE
(Icebreakers)
1. What city do you live in? Do you room together or live separately?
Boy: I live in Van Nuys.
Girl: Me too.
2. How much time do you spend together each day? On the weekends?
Boy: We see each other every day for at least a couple of hours.
3. Where do you usually go for a romantic night out, or just to have fun on weekends?
Boy: We usually just go to dinner and a movie or the mall.
(Attempt to discover their Power-Dynamics: who is Dominant):
4. Who usually decides where to go for the dates?
Girl: He does.
5. In the beginning of your relationship, who made the first move to break the ice and start the
dating relationship?
Boy: I did.
6. What did that person do to get the other person to take interest and agree to go out?
Girl: We had class together, so we just studied together and flirt with each other.
7. Who do you think is more dominant in your relationship? (a blunt question yes, but if you
have relaxed the couple, most times they will feel comfortable answering).

Reuben 9
Boy: I think that I am.
Girl: I think its equal.
(Attempt to discover the correlation to Female Gender Equality):
8. Should collegiate female track athletes be allowed to race on the mens track team? In the
Olympics? Why?
Boy: No, I dont think it would be a fair race if girls and guys raced together.
Girl: Yeah why not, girls can do anything guys can.
9. Do you agree with the new US militarys decision to let women fight side-by-side with the
men in the armys infantry combat forces? Why?
Boy: No I think that only men should be able to fight in the military.
Girl: No, I think only men should fight also.
(Attempt to discover the correlation to attitudes towards Sexuality):
10. Would you be in favor of letting women go topless on Los Angeles beaches?
Boy: No (Girl agreed)
11. Do you know who the singers Miley Cyrus and Nicki Minaj are? (SHOW THE PHOTOS
OF THE PERFORMERS) Have you ever seen any of their videos or live performances? If so,
do you think their sexual exhibitionism in performances is going too far? Why or why not?
Boy: No I think that it makes them look bad (Girl agreed again)
12. Do you think female high school students should be allowed to wear these short cutoff shorts
to school? (SHOW PHOTO OF THE GIRL)
Girl: Yeah theyre just shorts I dont think its that big of a deal. (Boy agreed)
13. Should prostitution be legalized in Los Angeles?

Reuben 10
Both: No
14. On a date, if a girl wears a short, tight-fitting microskirt to a dance club or party, do you think
shes degrading herself and becoming nothing more than a sexual object? (SHOW PHOTO OF
THE GIRL)
Boy: I think they are trying to show that they are easy to get. (Girl agreed)
15. If a female college student wears the same microskirt to a college party, is she presenting
herself as a sexual object?
Both: Yeah, just like the question before theyre trying to show that they are easy.
(Overall Secret to Lasting Relationships):
16. What makes true love possible in your relationship today?
Girl: Being able to love the other unconditionally.
Boy: (Let the girl answer this one)
Then, show them a full color copy of the ad that your group chose to perform; ask both of the
partners who they believe the characters are, what they think the dramatic story behind the ad is,
and who they think is more in control of the gendered relationship depicted in the Ad. Note their
responses in your mind.
They both thought that the Boy in the blue was in control.
FOURTH COUPLE:
(Icebreakers)
1. What city do you live in? Do you room together or live separately?
Girl: Tarzana
Boy: Woodland Hills

Reuben 11
2. How much time do you spend together each day? On the weekends?
Girl: 5 hours each day, 8 on the weekends.
3. Where do you usually go for a romantic night out, or just to have fun on weekends?
Both: The pier, movies, or dinner.
(Attempt to discover their Power-Dynamics: who is Dominant):
4. Who usually decides where to go for the dates?
Girl: He does.
5. In the beginning of your relationship, who made the first move to break the ice and start the
dating relationship?
Girl: I did.
6. What did that person do to get the other person to take interest and agree to go out?
Girl: I put my number in his phone and told him to text me.
7. Who do you think is more dominant in your relationship? (a blunt question yes, but if you
have relaxed the couple, most times they will feel comfortable answering).
Girl: I think I am, but he thinks he is.
(Attempt to discover the correlation to Female Gender Equality):
8. Should collegiate female track athletes be allowed to race on the mens track team? In the
Olympics? Why?
Both: No because men are just naturally faster than women.
9. Do you agree with the new US militarys decision to let women fight side-by-side with the
men in the armys infantry combat forces? Why?
Both: If they pass the tests then why not.

Reuben 12
(Attempt to discover the correlation to attitudes towards Sexuality):
10. Would you be in favor of letting women go topless on Los Angeles beaches?
Both: No because breasts are a special thing and if men see them too often then they are
not considered private or special.
11. Do you know who the singers Miley Cyrus and Nicki Minaj are? (SHOW THE PHOTOS
OF THE PERFORMERS) Have you ever seen any of their videos or live performances? If so,
do you think their sexual exhibitionism in performances is going too far? Why or why not?
Boy: Yes, because they are supposed to be role models.
Girl: No, because they are being themselves.
12. Do you think female high school students should be allowed to wear these short cutoff shorts
to school? (SHOW PHOTO OF THE GIRL)
Girl: Yeah because it really hot outside.
Boy: No, because youre not going to Coachella every day.
13. Should prostitution be legalized in Los Angeles?
Both: No
14. On a date, if a girl wears a short, tight-fitting microskirt to a dance club or party, do you think
shes degrading herself and becoming nothing more than a sexual object? (SHOW PHOTO OF
THE GIRL)
Both: Yes
15. If a female college student wears the same microskirt to a college party, is she presenting
herself as a sexual object?
Both: Yes

Reuben 13
(Overall Secret to Lasting Relationships):
16. What makes true love possible in your relationship today?
Both: Loyalty and honesty.
Then, show them a full color copy of the ad that your group chose to perform; ask both of the
partners who they believe the characters are, what they think the dramatic story behind the ad is,
and who they think is more in control of the gendered relationship depicted in the Ad. Note their
responses in your mind.
They both thought that the two guys are trying to save the girl in the bikini from a rapist,
and that the guys are in control.
FIFTH COUPLE:
(Icebreakers)
1. What city do you live in? Do you room together or live separately?
Girl: Van Nuys.
Boy: Northridge on campus.
2. How much time do you spend together each day? On the weekends?
Girl: Whenever we dont have class and about 4 hours on the weekends, but he
goes home to stay with his parents most of the weekend.
3. Where do you usually go for a romantic night out, or just to have fun on weekends?
Boy: Anywhere just to be together like dinner or bowling.
(Attempt to discover their Power-Dynamics: who is Dominant):
4. Who usually decides where to go for the dates?
Girl: We both take turns choosing places.

Reuben 14
5. In the beginning of your relationship, who made the first move to break the ice and start the
dating relationship?
Boy: We both showed signs that we liked each other, and then I finally asked her out.
6. What did that person do to get the other person to take interest and agree to go out?
Girl: We already had interest in each other so we just got to know each other for a while.
7. Who do you think is more dominant in your relationship? (a blunt question yes, but if you
have relaxed the couple, most times they will feel comfortable answering).
Both: The girl is.
(Attempt to discover the correlation to Female Gender Equality):
8. Should collegiate female track athletes be allowed to race on the mens track team? In the
Olympics? Why?
Both: Yes because there are some women who are even better than men.
9. Do you agree with the new US militarys decision to let women fight side-by-side with the
men in the armys infantry combat forces? Why?
Both: Yes, women are just as strong as men and can handle tough situations.
(Attempt to discover the correlation to attitudes towards Sexuality):
10. Would you be in favor of letting women go topless on Los Angeles beaches?
Both: Yeah why not.
11. Do you know who the singers Miley Cyrus and Nicki Minaj are? (SHOW THE PHOTOS
OF THE PERFORMERS) Have you ever seen any of their videos or live performances? If so,
do you think their sexual exhibitionism in performances is going too far? Why or why not?
Boy: Yes.

Reuben 15
Girl: No, they should be able to express themselves in whatever way they want to.
12. Do you think female high school students should be allowed to wear these short cutoff shorts
to school? (SHOW PHOTO OF THE GIRL)
Girl: Yes, they should be able to wear what they please and should not be pressured to
cover up because they might distract boys.
13. Should prostitution be legalized in Los Angeles?
Both: No
14. On a date, if a girl wears a short, tight-fitting microskirt to a dance club or party, do you think
shes degrading herself and becoming nothing more than a sexual object? (SHOW PHOTO OF
THE GIRL)
Both: No, she should be allowed to dress however she wants, it is her decision whether or
not she wants to want to show off her body.
15. If a female college student wears the same microskirt to a college party, is she presenting
herself as a sexual object?
Both: No.
(Overall Secret to Lasting Relationships):
16. What makes true love possible in your relationship today?
Both agreed: Communication and making each other feel comfortable and important.
Then, show them a full color copy of the ad that your group chose to perform; ask both of the
partners who they believe the characters are, what they think the dramatic story behind the ad is,
and who they think is more in control of the gendered relationship depicted in the Ad. Note their
responses in your mind.

Reuben 16
They thought that female is in control and she is seducing the men.
SIXTH COUPLE
(Icebreakers)
1. What city do you live in? Do you room together or live separately?
Boy: Northridge
Girl: Northridge
2. How much time do you spend together each day? On the weekends?
Boy: On the weekdays about three to four hours and weekends three to five.
3. Where do you usually go for a romantic night out, or just to have fun on weekends?
Boy: We like to go to the beach together or out to eat.
(Attempt to discover their Power-Dynamics: who is Dominant):
4. Who usually decides where to go for the dates?
Girl: He is.
5. In the beginning of your relationship, who made the first move to break the ice and start the
dating relationship?
Boy: I did.
6. What did that person do to get the other person to take interest and agree to go out?
Boy: I used a lot of humor and made her laugh
Girl: And I just thought that he was a nice guy.
7. Who do you think is more dominant in your relationship? (a blunt question yes, but if you
have relaxed the couple, most times they will feel comfortable answering).
Girl: I think that hes mostly the dominant one.

Reuben 17
(Attempt to discover the correlation to Female Gender Equality):
8. Should collegiate female track athletes be allowed to race on the mens track team? In the
Olympics? Why?
Both: Yes, they have right to compete against men.
9. Do you agree with the new US militarys decision to let women fight side-by-side with the
men in the armys infantry combat forces? Why?
Both: Yes, women should have the option to join if they choose to.
(Attempt to discover the correlation to attitudes towards Sexuality):
10. Would you be in favor of letting women go topless on Los Angeles beaches?
Both: no
11. Do you know who the singers Miley Cyrus and Nicki Minaj are? (SHOW THE PHOTOS
OF THE PERFORMERS) Have you ever seen any of their videos or live performances? If so,
do you think their sexual exhibitionism in performances is going too far? Why or why not?
Both: Yes, they are setting a bad image for young girls.
12. Do you think female high school students should be allowed to wear these short cutoff shorts
to school? (SHOW PHOTO OF THE GIRL)
Both: No
13. Should prostitution be legalized in Los Angeles?
Both: No
14. On a date, if a girl wears a short, tight-fitting microskirt to a dance club or party, do you think
shes degrading herself and becoming nothing more than a sexual object? (SHOW PHOTO OF
THE GIRL)

Reuben 18
Both: No, they should be able to wear whatever they feel comfortable in without feeling
like sexual objects.
15. If a female college student wears the same microskirt to a college party, is she presenting
herself as a sexual object?
Both:No.
(Overall Secret to Lasting Relationships):
16. What makes true love possible in your relationship today?
Both: To make each other happy and be faithful to one another.
Then, show them a full color copy of the ad that your group chose to perform; ask both of the
partners who they believe the characters are, what they think the dramatic story behind the ad is,
and who they think is more in control of the gendered relationship depicted in the Ad. Note their
responses in your mind.
They thought that the men are dominant ones in the ad and the woman looks like she is
there to be with the man and does not really serve any other purpose.