Running Head: Self Identity Essay

Tears and a Grand Champion Banner

Harlee Maupin
Univi150
March 1st 2015

Self Identity Essay

Harlee Maupin
UNIV 105i
Millard
1 March, 2015

Part One: An Introduction to Identity and Identity Formation Processes

Identity is a human tool, developed through experience, and permitting
individuals and groups to have a sense of their place(s), preferences, values, abilities and
roles in relationships, work and broader social contexts (McAdams et. All 2006). Each
person has their own individual identities that are made up of different experiences.
Everyone has experiences that have shaped who they become and how they identify
themselves. Many people use their identities to feel a sense of purpose.
Many researches believe that a primary identity formation process for human
beings is storytelling. (Scott 2010). Stories always include our own perspective: on our
selves, other people, situations, and the meaning(s) of our experiences. (McAdams et. All
2006). There are many stories and past experiences in my life that have made me the
person I am today, and that have shaped my identity.
Part Two: Story of Self & Identity Exploration
Tears and a Grand Champion Banner
Ill never forget the anxiety I felt in the pit of my stomach. The uncomfortable
itchiness from the green 4-H hat tight on my forehead. The afternoon sun bright in my
eyes as the judge was talking with a thick southern accent over the loud and scratchy
microphone. The smell from the dust of the shavings and the sounds of the hungry
animals.

Self Identity Essay

It was my second time showing at the Eastern San Diego County Junior Fair, I
was showing my steer T&T. I was nine years old, it was Grand Champion drive and I was
called back into the show ring because I had won my market class. I walked in with
butterflies in my stomach but I kept a calm and confident look on my face. I smiled at the
judge as I walked by and he directed me to walk around the show ring. I stopped on the
side opposite of the bleachers. I looked up to try and see my parents; the sun was on the
verge of setting and was interrupting my eyesight making it difficult to see anything. I
looked down the line of cattle at my fellow competitors and one looked back at me; we
shared a slight smile and then looked back at the judge. The judge started talking
describing what he liked about each of the steers, starting from the back of the line and
working his way to me. I looked at my steer, I saw the sun on his copper red hair, I saw
his white eyelashes as he looked at me and blinked. I saw the little beads of moister
building up on his nose and I felt his rough tongue come out of his mouth and lick my
hand.
The judge got to my steer and I, my heart stopped. I was so nervous, my heart felt
like it was going to jump out of my chest. The judge started to talk about my steer; he
started describing him as the red baldy, but after those words I couldnt focus on what he
was saying. I was too worried about what the next two minutes had in store. These next
two minutes were at the time the most important two minutes of my very young life. The
judge wrapped it up with something like lets give these young exhibitors a round of
applause, and then I will go shake the winners hand. He walked dragging his heels back
to the table with the microphone at the corner of the ring. He grabbed the deep purple
banner, and walked back to the middle of the ring. He paused and took a long intense

Self Identity Essay

look at all of the steers. He walked and looked at them, put his hand on his chin and
moved his index figure back and forth in a scratching motion. Walking in between all the
steers he took his straw cowboy hat off, scratched his white hair and put it back snug on
his head. He returned to the center of the ring, smiled a crooked smile and began walking
toward me.
I got a not in my throat, my hands got sweaty and I could hear my mom behind
me saying, yes its her he is walking toward her. The judge walked up to me with his
hand out; before I shook it I whipped my hands on my pants. I grabbed the banner saying
thank you, and before I knew it I was crying. He asked me to walk my steer across the
ring as I did I whipped my face took a deep breath and smiled a huge smile. I had never
been more happy and proud of myself.
After I walked out of the ring I was greeted by a giant hug from my mother, she
was crying and it made me cry more. My friends and family were all there to congratulate
me and it made me feel like I had just won the Super Bowl or something.
I put my steer in Grand Champion Row and was swooped off my feet by my big
brother, and his friends Daren, Luke and Justin and carried to the water trough. My
brothers friends stripped me of my belt, phone and boots and dropped me in the freezing,
mossy water. I got out shocked and ready to attack; I hugged and tackled my brother into
the dirt. My parents, friends and even my competitors jumped in, and it was a blast.
The day I won Grand Champion with my steer T&T, is still one of my favorite
days, not only because I won, but also because I had a blast bringing all my friends and
family together. I went home that night feeling more confident and happy then I had ever
felt before.

Self Identity Essay

Part Three: Analysis of Identity Formation Processes in Your Story

Throughout my story I added information I felt was necessary to make my story
fluent, and detailed. For example when I descried what I saw when I first walked into the
ring. I could have included more back ground detail about raising T&T and the time at
fair leading up to Grand Champion Drive but I didnt because it wasnt relevant to the
exact story I was telling. I wanted to keep the story short and sweet.
I told my story happened in chronological order, without the order it wouldnt
have made very much sense. The story starts in the past when I was nine years old and
ends in the past when I was nine years old. The story is used to tell the story about how I
was able to build my confidence.
This story reflects my passion for showing animals, my competitive drive, my
love for family and friends, and the enjoyment I get having fun. This story is definitely a
story that I fell reflects my identity. I grew up showing cattle and living on a cattle ranch,
the first time I won Grand Champion was with my first steer, was one of the proudest
moments in my life for my family and me. The tradition of me being tackled, picked up
and thrown into the water trough happened every year I won Grand Champion. This story
is more than a story for me, this story started my passion for showing steers and without
showing I have no idea where I would be right now.
Part Four: Reflection
I would define identity as who you are. Your identity is what makes you, you.
Identity is shaped of every experience you have experienced. I believe that if one small
thing if your life changed you wouldnt be the person you are today, changing one thing
could ultimately change your entire identity. Every mistake, or bad decision has shaped

Self Identity Essay

you, the good times an great laughs have made you who you are. Without all of our
individual experiences we would all be the same boring person, its out experiences and
our identities that make us who we are.
A persons identity is their self worth, their skills, their preferences, their character
and their out look on things. My identity is exactly what I want it to be. I feel that my
identity is a strong headed, opened minded, happy, glass half full personality. I enjoy
laughing, showing cattle, diesel trucks, hunting, and agriculture. I also enjoy shopping
and being a girlie girl. I have a very complex identity, I am super country and down to
earth but I am also super girlie. My favorite flowers are daisies because my very first
cows name is Daisy. I have two tattoos that mean very much to me, one is a quote that
says Lifes too short to worry Lifes too short to wait this is a quote I live by because I
never want to let an opportunity get away. I dont want to live a life of I wish I would
have. The other tattoo is a key, and my mom has the matching heart shaped locket
because my mom and me are best friends. She is the most important person in my life and
is the mail influence on who I am today. I try to be fearless and make every moment
count. I dont want to change one thing about my identity I am happy and I think thats
how every person should feel about their identity. We are all unique and different
individuals with different identities.