Jordan Earles

Carter
5B
Midterm Timed Writing
In Seamus Deanes thought-provoking excerpt, his reflections on his own childhood
experiences with books and writing shaped the person he became as a reader and writer
himself.
The first book he expressed, The Shan Van Vacht, is about a great rebellion of 1798
(line 4), which Deane sang songs about, around fires on the Feast of Assumption (line 6). The
heroine Ann, was an intriguing talker whom Deane like to talk too and told her how beautiful
she was and how I wouldnt go out on the rebellionjust sit there and whisper in her ear
(lines 22-24). Deane assumed writing was supposed to be complex, with big words and filled
with action and heroes. For a while, thats how Deane wrote, thinking all writing is that way and
all writing had to have hard-to-understand words and a hero.
Then one day, Deanes English teacher read an essay to the class that was written by a
country boy (line 39). In this essay, a mother was setting the table for the evening meal and
then waiting with [her son] until his father came in from the fields (lines 40-42). The essay
continues on in a very calm and simple manner, with no hard-to-understand words, no action,
no rebellion, and no heroes. The English teacher, once finished with the story, proceeds to tell
the class Now that, thats a writing. Thats just telling the truth (lines 61-62). After hearing
this essay, Deane feels embarrassed because my own essay had been full of long or strange
words I had found in the dictionary cerulean, azure, phantasm, and implacable all of
them describing skies and seas I had seen only with the Ann of the novel. (lines 63-67). Deane
was unaware of truth in writing, and how sometimes truth is more valuable than fiction.
As Deane realized stories could be about ordinary life, he then saw truth in writing
about everyday events. Seeing and hearing the simple essay, Deane learned how to write about
his own experiences and their impact o him as a writer.

Comment [J1]: Changing himself to in the

future because this short story was about Deanes
transformation into a better, more advanced writer.

Comment [J2]: Changing talked too to

converse with because talk gets repetitive in
this section.
Comment [J3]: Adding From every book Deane
read as a child, he to add clarity.
Comment [J4]: Deletion of Deane so the
sentence will flow.
Comment [J5]: Adding , who saves everyone
and has super powers to define the word hero as
it is being used in the story.
Comment [J6]: Adding , foreshadowing the
change Deane is about to make in his own writing
for specificity.
Comment [J7]: Adding , astounding Deane to
add the expression Deane had when he learned
stories dont have to have heroes and wars.

Comment [J8]: Adding , and interesting in

order to show that the general public is truly
interested in the truth because its more relatable
than fiction.
Comment [J9]: Adding , creating truthful,
interesting writing that would further expand his
writing capabilities for the future.