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Dear Angee Article
Dear Angee Article
I KNOW what the Bible says about the Man being the head of the
household. But Ive been extremely blessed in my career and financially.
So when I get married, chances are, Ill be making a lot more than my
husband. So- what does it mean for him to be the head spiritually, if hes
not the head financially or naturally? Do I still have to defer to him?
To answer your question in shortThe answer is YES!!! Yes, you are still
required to defer to your husband. However, In order to attempt to answer this
question in more detail, I think we have to explore a few terms and definitions.
We must first consider that: Men and Women react to Money very differently. Money
is not the same nor means the same for everyone. This alone can be problematic in
a relationship and marriage. Its important to realize here, that in some cases, what
a man does is a deep part of who he is. We will come back to this.
The term Power is multifaceted and difficult to sum up in one definition. However, in
regards to this specific question, Power means the control over the access to or
control over resources etc. So if a woman makes more Money, she also has access
to more Financial Resources. Furthermore, if priorities differ over the distribution of
those resources. A Power struggle most definitely will ensue. And herein lies the
problem.
In many cases, Society ties and equates leadership of the man to his ability to
provide financially for his family. However, leadership of the home and in a marriage
is much more than finances or financial power.
The role of the man is to be the head of his house, regardless of whether his wife
makes more money or not. A mans Leadership should never be based on his
income.
I dont believe you have to make the most money in your home to be the leader. I
dont believe the person that makes the most money is the head or holds the most
power either. Thats societal norms. I dont follow societys principles, I follow Gods
Word and principles. A mans Leadership should never be based on his income.
The man leads the home in various aspects such as: ...Spiritually: leading devotion,
leading prayer time or attending church services. A Man Leads Emotionally by:
having a listening ear, listening to all family members and making Godly prayerful
decisions. A Man can Lead Socially: planning vacations, outings, attending family
functions, date nightsetc. A Man Leads Intellectually: teaching his children, his
wife, encouraging education, helping with homework, studying, having worldview
discussions, biblical discussions about the word of God, sharing wisdom and
insight...etc.
As a Husband leads his home/family in all of these ways, the woman is to Submit
herself to the mans leadership in their institution of marriage. A womans role in
the home is to submit to the leadership of the man, regardless of her position, title
or income outside the home.
The term Submission is also not what society has made it be. Submission is having
an Opinion/Suggestion and Still Sharing your Opinion(a Womens Wisdom LOL)
BUT.willingly deferring your opinion/suggestion to your Husbands Authority
and praying that he makes the right choice and decision with the help of God!!!!
(you might need to Reread that.. lol). Wives must Trust the God in their Husbands;
ultimately trusting God!
Another part of Submission, is learning the skill of how to let your opinion and
message across to your husband without him feeling berated. This can be
challenging, but possible. Here are a few Suggestions that I know that might help:
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Personally, when I think about marriage and the roles of both man and woman, it is
extremely a deep concept. Im convinced many people, single and even married
still dont understand What marriage really means and how God actually really
views marriage. Biblically, God compares and likens marriage to the church. Gods
highest purpose in marriage: is to showcase the intimate relationship
between Christ and his People. (reread that!!! ) In other words we are acting out
a living parable where husbands represent Christ and Wiveswell we represent the
Church, to bring Glory to God and to help our children and others around us to grasp
what God is like in a very real and concrete way.
We cant do this by ourselves. Just as we need Gods help to be obedient servants
and to live right. We need Gods help to be help meets to our husbands.
In conclusion, I believe the bible, the Man is the head! And how much money you
make has nothing to do with you honoring him as your head, reverencing him,
respecting him, supporting him, considering him and communicating with him. This
is Gods will for you as a Woman and a Wife.
Try reading these Scriptures:
I Peter 3:7;
Prov. 31:10-31;
Eph. 5:25-33
I dont have anymore scriptures, I know there are more, but didnt have time to fully research like
I wanted to.