Text from my initial

WP submission:

An observation or
question I received
from De Piero or a
classmate:

The change(s) I
made to what I
initially wrote:

How this change

impacts my paper:

My WP3 reflection paper didn't include anything about the challenges I faced in writing
my paper or what I did
particularly well.

If you revise this, I

think you have plenty
of options to expand
upon. What challenges did you face?
What did you think
you did particularly
well?
-ZDP

I included a paragraph
about how I initially
struggled with
formatting my fauxDaily Nexus article to
look authentic but how I
think it turned out quite
nicely. I then expanded
on the things I did (like
including an ad geared
towards students and
giving previews to other
articles) that made my
article look more
convincing.

I think including this

paragraph strengthened
my paper because it
demonstrated that I
really thought through
the conventions of a
college newspaper
article and applied
those conventions to
my own work. The
paragraph showed that
the choices I made in
the formatting and
content of the article
were not merely
coincidental; they were
calculated decisions I
made to make my
article more convincing
and authentic to the
reader.

Text from my initial

WP submission:

An observation or
question I received
from De Piero or a
classmate:

The change(s) I
made to what I
initially wrote:

How this change

impacts my paper:

When I converted my
WP3 childrens book
from a pages
document to a word
document, the
formatting of the book
got screwed up and text
wasnt where it was
supposed to be.

One area you could

improve upon is the
general formatting of
the Gary piece. The
text was a little
gunked up and
sometimes wasnt in
line with the pictures
it described. Other
times, it ran into the
next page.
-ZDP

I fixed the formatting so

the text was on the
same page as the
pictures it described
and also included lines
in my paper to
differentiate between
different pages more
clearly.

This made the Gary

piece 1,000 times
better. Fixing the
formatting made it so
the reader could clearly
follow what was going
on, instead of having to
search for the next line
of text and piece
together what pictures
went with what
sentences. By initially
failing to check the
formatting of this piece
before I submitted it, I
made myself look very
lazy and unprofessional
because it was very
apparent that I did not
check the document
before submitting it. In
going back and having
to fix the childrens
book, I learned a
valuable lesson about
the importance of
double-checking (or
quadruple checking) my
work before submitting
it to ensure that I am
submitting the best
work I can possibly do.

Text from my initial

WP submission:

An observation or
question I received
from De Piero or a
classmate:

The change(s) I
made to what I
initially wrote:

How this change

impacts my paper:

The intro of my W1
assignment focused
on listicles and the
thesis was: Through
analyzing the listicles,
20 Qualities The
Person Youre Going
To Marry Should
Have, 25 Qualities
of The Person You
Should Marry, and
7 Essential Qualities
to Look for in Your
Future Husband, it
becomes apparent that
listicles generally
tend to follow certain
conventions and use
the similar rhetorical
devices, which make
the genre of listicles
what it is.

I think you need to

find a way to tie this
into more of a
studying/learning
genre perspective,
which should
probably be
established from the
beginning. Can you
find a way to weave
this into your thesis
statement? This
could deepen your
argument and also
help you adhere more
directly to the
assignment.
-ZDP

The intro focused on

genres/conventions
and the thesis was:
After analyzing this
genre of writing, it
became apparent that
genres are comprised
of certain conventions
and use similar
rhetorical devices,
which make a genre
what it is.

This change helped

me better respond to
the prompt. Instead of
the focus of the paper
being about one specific genre and it conventions, this change
made the paper more
about genre and conventions in general.
This was an improvement to my paper because it displayed that I have a
through knowledge of
the concept of genres,
rather than a vast
knowledge about listicles (which is not
the subject of the
class).

Text from my initial

WP submission:

An observation or
question I received
from De Piero or a
classmate:

The change(s) I
made to what I
initially wrote:

How this change

impacts my paper:

I didnt cite any of the I thought you fell

course readings in my short on the
learning/studying
WP1 assignment.
genre aspect and the
tie-ins to course
readings (I didnt see
1!). If you decide to
revise this for your
portfolio, thats a
must.
-ZDP

I included excerpts
from both
Navigating Genres
and Murder!
(Rhetorically
Speaking).

Including course
readings improved
my paper for many
reasons. Firstly,
without them, I was
not fully responding
to the prompt (which
specifically said to
use course readings).
Secondly, it gave me
more credibility
because the reader
was getting more
opinions and
perspectives than just
mine alone.

One of the articles

that I previewed in
the mini table of
contents at the top of
my WP3 newspaper
article was entitled
Team Wins Game
with Team Gets
More Points than the
Other Guy
underneath.

I changed that title to

Mens Soccer Team
Goes to Finals and
put Page 3
underneath. I also
included a picture of a
UCSB mens soccer
player.

This made my WP3

more convincing. A
college newspaper
would never print
Team Wins Games
because that isnt
specific and would
make them look lazy
and unprofessional.
Mens Soccer Team
Goes to Finals stays
more true to the
conventions of a
college newspaper
because it specifies
which team, is
attention grabbing,
and is informative.

"I think you should

change the top left
article in your WP3
assignment that was
directed towards kids.
I dont think you
would ever see that in
an actual college
newspaper. Also, you
dont include the page
number that story is
located on like the
other ones.
-Classmate