Emily Hermann

ENG 321
Sister Thompson

Product Reviews

The Cable Factory

Prepare the Bro-tanks

Photo Courtesy of The Cable Factory

The Cable Factory is a crazy fun wakeboard park... if you dont mind sharing your time with 5 other riders and an
employee or two. Much like this jump, the park is a good idea, but a closer look shows its actually a pretty slapdash, rickety, and altogether questionable operation. Ride with caution, friends.

What is
it?
Stats

he Cable Factory is tiny little cable park that opened up about 3 years ago
here in Rexburg. Its located on the other side of the highway (yeah, turns
out Rexburg is bigger than BYU-Idaho and Broulims) and features a lake with
paddle-boarding, beach access, and two cables for riders.

2 Cables, one set for beginning riders, one for advanced

8-9 Sets (wedges/ramps/rails/obstacles for the cable lines)
15 Paddle Boards
10 (ish?) Paddles*
1 Tramp
1 Skateboard Half-Pipe
About 30 Square feet of beach
2 (ish?) dogs running wild and free
(Seemingly) Unlimited dudes in bro tanks

*Estimated based on the fact that I had to use a teeny tiny broken half of a paddle because they ran out of actual working ones.

Past
As a life-long wakeboarding fan, I was
stoked when The Cable Factory opened
in Rexburg. It was close, it was cool,
and it was ultra-casual. And I mean
ultra-casual. Check in took place in a
dirty, dilapidated shed and was facilitated by an employee unless decided
to go ride the cable, in which case you
had to go flag him down and get him to
let you pay. Technically, they had time
limits (you paid $35 for a two-hour slot
that you shared with what was apparently no limit of other riders), but they
werent enforced; on my first day we
spent about four hours riding the cable.
The factory emanated a kind of secret/
grassroots/hipster-turned-skater feel
almost cool enough to make you forget
how unprofessional everything was.

Unfortunately, the lack of time-limit enforcement was not just a bonus,

but necessary; the overly-laid-back
employee nicknamed Stinky spent
about a third of our two-hour slot on
his own run. Basically, I only ended up
getting about 15 minutes of ride time,
since there wasnt a limit to how long
any individual rider could go. It was
more than a little frustrating that Stinky
had no qualms about using our time to
ride himself. And then you left with that
annoying impression that no one really
cared whether or not the customers
had a good time. The rather steep price
didnt seem worth it for the limited ride
time and general frustration I felt after
leaving, so I didnt go back for a long
time.

Present
It has been about 3 years since The
Cable Factory opened its beaches, and
Im happy to say theyve made great
progress on the professionalism side
of things. I finally went back to the park
just this weekend and it is obvious that
the Factory has been gaining traction
and popularity in Rexburg. Operations
have been moved from a cramped,
dirty shed to a still-pretty-dirty-butnewer shed thats closer to the lines.
Theyve added paddle-board rentals,
a half-pipe, a trampoline, and a second cable line. Riders now have to sign
rental agreements, and the staff notices
if you go over your allotted time slot.
New, semi-professionally done signage
is everywhere, they have custom paddle boards, and are even hawking some
gear with their logo screenprinted on it.

Unfortunately, even with all of the

upgrades and some moves towards
legitimacy, the lack of professionalism
at Cable Factory still leaves you feeling
like you have a piece of gum stuck on
your flip-flop. Its not going to prevent
you from walking, but it definitely drives
you crazy. Stinky, the lazy, cable-stealing employee still runs the place (somehow), and unless youre in his inner-circle of summer salesmen and toolbags,
youll get ignored on the cable. The
paddle-board rentals are fun, but the
boards themselves have a tendency to
sink, and there are only like 8 paddles
that arent broken or made for little kids.
The beach is okay, but its so tiny you
had better get comfortable putting sunscreen on strangers.

Future
The Cable Factory is brilliant idea. The
cheap paddle board rentals and beach
access make it worth putting up with broken
paddles and limited space for an hour of
pretending you live somewhere less farmy
than Rexburg; unfortunately, the overly lax
management and ridiculous way the cables are run make actually riding the cables
an expensive frustration. If the Factory can
manage to upgrade their management and
learn what customer service means, they
could become the only spot for Rexburgians in the summer. Until then, its a good
pastime for people who dont mind a bunch
of hulked-out bro tanks calling you bruh
and stealing your cable time.

Photo Courtesy of The Cable Factory

In the end, the Cable Factory is worth a visit, just

dont get your hopes up too high.

Ronix Time Bomb

Jump All The Things!

he Ronix Time Bomb has been around for

a few years, but the 2015 edition of the
wakeboard is a force to be reckoned with.E
ven though Ronix likes to champion the Time
Bombs speed above all else, weve found
the boards biggest bonus is the extra pop
you get at the wake. This baby will have you
riding faster than a jet-propelled ice skater on
steroids and jumping higher than a tween girl
at a One Direction concert.

Brand: Ronix
Rocker Type: 3 Stage
Board Type: Wake
Year: 2015
Fins: 4, detachable, 1.0, ramp
Size/Weight: 134 cm--up to 165 lbs

138 cm-Up to 180 lbs

142 cm-170 lbs+
Lands it: Thin profile, increased glide speed,
less water resistance at the wake
Eats it: Turning transition is a little slow, but
thats not always a bad thing.

What is
it?

Stats

The Time Bomb Flies

3 Stage
Rocker: 3
Times the
Pop*

*not scientifically tested in the least, but it makes a good subhead.

The Time Bomb is one of our favorite three-stage rockers to date. For newbies on the site,
a three-stage rocker is one of two types of board shapes available. You have continuous
rockers, which means that if you look at the board from the side, it has a smooth arc from
tip to tip. Continuous arcs are great for speed, but not great for jumps. Three-stage rockers
have a flat middle section (so when the board lays on the ground the middle part is flush)
and then the two side parts angle up slightly (like the rim of a dinner plate, nothing crazy).
These rockers give jumps a lot more pop that continuous rockers, because the stage system
maximizes the upward force of the edge of the wake and launches you a little more vertically a lot more easily.
Now, the Time Bomb is not any three-stage rocker; its the rockstar of three-stage rockers.
Thanks to its super slim design and a late rocker (or a smaller center), the board gives a
surprising amount of speed with very little effort. Ronix did an amazing job of maximizing
the jump benefits of the rocker while minimizing the potential loss of speed.

Built to
Last and
Built to
Snap

There are a lot of three-stage rockers on the market, and although the Time Bomb is an exceptional one, its not great enough to make it our board pick (or pro rider Danny Harf s).
Ronix not only gave this board a well-engineered rocker, they built it out of great materials.
We wont bore you with the details (Air Core Foam and Mod Pour core for max strengthto-weight capability), but suffice it to say this board will not only survive your worst, it will
handle it with class. For some reason, three-stage rockers tend to be stiff (gotta maximize
that pop, right) but Ronix used a super strong mesh alloy that gives the board enough flex
to keep you comfortable while throwing tricks on double-ups or cutting glass on dawn
patrol.
Not only is the board the perfect mix of flexible and strong, its ultra-lightweight. Theres
nothing worse than feeling like you have an anchor strapped to your feet; your board
should feel like an extension of your body. The light board makes it easy to change leading
foot and butterslide, but most importantly, it gives your jumps more pop and its way easier
to do some of the more difficult tricks (superman, anyone?).

The
Breakdown

We could only find one negative to the Time Bomb, and thats not even really a negative.
The edging and rocker style make turning a tiny bit slower, but most riders wont even
notice. Those who do notice will probably like the extra sense of control that it gives (and if
they dont, they will after a few pulls).

Theres a reason the Time Bomb is the only board that Danny Harf uses; its incredible. A three-stage rocker gives your jumps tons of pop, and the lightweight, flexible construction means that you arent sacrificing control for height. This 2015 edition is our new
favorite board, by far. Its a little expensive, but if youre looking for something to give your
ride something extra, Ronix has the answer: Time Bomb.