Tuesday 26th January

L.O. To understand how to proofread and edit

work, up-levelling sentences using dictionary and
thesaurus.
The purple is the shared editing and the green is
the childrens group editing.
This is Fred. He is a frog. He live in a pond.
This is Fred. He is a slimy frog and he lives near an
indian waterfall.
He wanted to leave the pond.
He wanted to leave the dirty, dark pond because
he was lonely and had no friends. He go to his unkl
frank. He is a firefly.
He goes to his amazing and strong Uncle Frank who
is a fluttering, happy, sparkling firefly. He doesnt
like it because Uncle Franks flashing lights are
annoying him! (Aicha, Gabriel, Hasan & Taeyeon).
Fred don't like living with frank so he leaves.
Fred did not like living with his crazy Uncle Frank
because the food was bad and his uncle was
unkind, so he leaves. (Calder, Yehee & Saif).
Fred doesnt like staying with his Uncle Frank so he
goes. (Jorja, Taim and Noora).

then he go to aunty ants. She makes him a nice

dinner.
Then he goes to is great Aunty Ants. She makes a
delicious dinner. (Shane, Julia and Alya)
Fred is getting tired. He miss home.
Fred is getting egsosted. He misses home becous
he is not happy about that no wan is looking like
him. (Chloe, Shamma & Saeed)
He go back to his house but no one is there.
He goes back to his smelly dirty pound but, no-one
is there! Because thier are off to find him. What
shall I do? cried Fred. He was so frightened and
worried.
You have all up-levelled the sentences very
well, using dictionaries as best as possible to check
spelling and using a thesaurus to add in better
adjectives. You all worked superbly.