David JR, 22

Crashing the Party

Josh Tobiessen
I dont want a job just for the sake of having a
job. I want to make a difference somewhere in
the world. I want my life to have meaning. Like, I
was watching that show Charlie Rose, and this
guy was on it who had built some schools or
something in India? No. Someplace more topical.
Afghanistan or something. There were all these
pictures of him with these school kids in burkas
or, not the whole burka, but, you know, they
looked Middle Eastern. What-ever, the point is
that I want to be on Charlie Rose. I want to live
the kind of life that people want to interview you
about. You know, its like, youre at a cocktail
party somewhere wearing some traditional piece
of clothing from whatever country youre helping
and youre talking to some douchebag in a suit
and hes like, Yeah, I just made blankity-blank
amount of money with a hedge fund, what do
you do? And youre, I just built a hospital in
Bangladesh, dickhead. Bam! You win. And the
guy realizes that hes been wasting his life. I
dont know, maybe he suddenly wants to give all
his money to your hospital. Thats how you
make connections. Networking. I mean, at the
end of your life youre going to ask yourself,
Did I make a difference? Did I make some
children smile? Answer: Yes. I did. I built a
school somewhere. Not here, in a place where
kids actually like going to school. I was on
Charlie Rose. Then you can die happy. Make
people cry. All those foreign kids who actually
like going to school bawling their eyes out.
Because now that Im dead, whos going to help
them? No one. Theyre screwed.