Written Assignment #3

Shelley Gordon
PSY 235
E40A
June 28, 2013

The early childhood years are a roller coaster of emotions, happy one minute
and throwing a tantrum the next. The process of emotional regulation, the ability to
control when and where your emotions are expressed 1 (Berger 277), in small
children takes patience and endurance. This process of emotional regulation begins
approximately at the age of two and continues through age six when children start
to get better at controlling their feelings. During these four years children will be
learning how to gain their independence while testing their limits that have been
put in place, using your words when you are mad is ok, using your fist when you are
mad is not ok. Children understand the emotions of happy, sad and scared early on
however around age three they start to experience more challenging emotions such
as pride, guilt and shame. Erik Erikson, a German born American psychologist and
psychoanalyst, called the third stage of psychosocial development in children the
initiative versus guilt stage. This is the time when Erikson believed that children
started to take initiative in making friends, planning activities and mastering new
skills. If parents encourage their childrens efforts it in turn builds the childs
confidence and self-esteem, a persons assessment of his or her own worth 2 (Berger
278). However if parents are critical or indifferent of the efforts made then children
will blame themselves and feel guilt for having failed. How a parent chooses to react
to a childs performance will not only affect their self-esteem but also the childs
self-concept, or how one perceives them self. Erikson believed that by nature most
young childrens self-concept was good; feeling strong, smart and good looking
3
(Berger 279) and taking great pride in themselves.
The presence of an adult, whether it is a parent, teacher or caregiver can
affect a young childs ability to control the regulation of his or her emotions.
Mistreated and ignored children can suffer from depression, aggression and violent
behaviors. They are most commonly referred to as the problem children 4 In
contrast the caregiver who gives attentive and consistent care can guide children in
how to properly express positive emotions and teach how to moderate negative
emotions. If a child is unable to express their emotions appropriately emotional
reactions can occur; the externalizing problems or the internalizing problems. The
externalizing problems results in the expressing of powerful emotions through
physical or verbal outbursts such as throwing things. Internalizing problems involves
1 Berger
2 Berger
3 Berger
4 www.aappublications.org

turning ones emotional stress inward and becoming fearful and withdrawn 5(Berger
281).
There are four types of aggression that form during the early childhood years.
They are instrumental, reactive, relational and bullying aggression. Instrumental
aggression is the most common and increases between the age of two and six years
of age. It primarily involves the getting and/or keeping of an object from another
person such as a toy. Reactive aggression, although hurtful, is an impulsive physical
or verbal retaliation, such as hitting someone because they cut in line. It often
declines between the ages of two and six as children learn to better regulate their
emotions. Relational aggression consists of verbal insults or social rejection. This
type of aggression is aimed at breaking down the social connections between the
individual and their peers. This destroys a childs self-esteem and becomes more
harmful as the child matures and social status becomes important to the individual.
Bullying aggression is the continuous, unprovoked verbal and physical attacks on
children. This aggression is usually directed towards children who are unlikely or
unable to defend themselves6(Berger 295). Although most of these behaviors are a
natural course taken as a child matures and learns self-control it is still imperative
that caregivers provide guidance in teaching how to manage anger and patience.
Early childhood educators should work with parents in providing a safe and loving
place, provide opportunities for positive interactions and be good role models for
children.
The effects of viewing violent video games and TV on children have long been
a subject of debate. The recent shootings at Sandy Hook Elementary brought this
topic to light again as many blamed the culprit, Adam Lanzas behavior on his
obsession with violent video games. While some researchers believe that watching
any aggression including football, hockey or videos of superheroes can lead to
aggressive, antisocial and attention problems in boys later in life 7 there are other
researchers that believe there is no evidence that videogames or other media
contributes, even in a small way, to mass homicides or violence among youth. 8
Does violent games and/or TV contribute to violence or do people with violent
tendencies gravitate toward that media?
American sociologist, Mildred Parten developed the five stages of play in
children during the early childhood years with each stage becoming more social
5 Berger
6 Berger
7 www.seattlechildrens.org
8 www.ideas.time.com

than the previous one. Stage one consists of solitary play in which a child plays
alone unaware of other children around them. Stage two is onlooker play where the
child watches other children play. Parallel play is stage three where children play
with similar toys in similar ways but not together. Associative and cooperative play
is stages four and five. At these stages the children are starting to interact with
cooperative play being more mutual and creative 9(Berger 285). Active play is very
important during the early childhood years in order to not only develop muscle
strength and coordination but to encourage social development. Socio-dramatic
play or pretending allows children to be whomever or whatever their mind wants
them to be, cowboys, doctors or ferocious lions. Socio-dramatic play allows children
to work on social interaction with their peers or a teacher, regulate emotions,
problem solve and build on language skills. Rough-and- tumble play is considered
the most common form of active play10 (Berger 286) amongst preschool boys and it
is one of the most challenging for some adults. Many teachers and parents
discourage rough-and-tumble play, also known to some as big body play, for fear it
is violent, leads to aggression, or fear of injury. Unlike actual fighting rough-andtumble play includes laughter and a play face 11 (Berger 286) that expresses
easiness and smiling. This type of play allows children to work on controlling their
body movements, nonverbal communication skills, and assist in developing
empathy. Teachers and parents can make rough-and-tumble play easier on them
and more enjoyable for the children if they establish some guidelines beforehand
such as preparing the area for safe play by removing potential hazards and
providing padding, establishing rules such as stopping when a person says or
signals stop and by supervising and stepping in when needed. 12
Children start to become aware of their sexual differences, developing a
sense of being a girl or a boy, around the age of two or three. This is also around the
time they start to experience gender differences, the roles and behaviors set down
by society or culture. Children will be convinced that certain toys are meant for boys
while other toys are for girls and they will play with children of their own gender.
Girls will often be swallowed up by the color pink and desire to be a princess while
boys will be donned in superhero capes and zooming trucks around the room. This
difference in gender identity can continue on through adolescence depending on
what parents teach children about female/male roles in society, what peers think
and the contribution of stereotyping in the media.
9 Berger
10 Berger
11 Berger
12 Teaching Young Children/Preschool

There are five major theories that attempt to explain the sex and/or gender
differences during early childhood. Psychoanalytic theory originated with Sigmund
Freud. Freud believed that ones personality developed in the first six years of life
through three stages, each characterized by sexual pleasure centered on a particular body
part 13(Berger 38). Freud called the stage between the ages of three and six the phallic
stage because he believed that the central focus was the phallus or penis 14 (Berger
300). It was during this time that boys developed the Oedipus complex, a secret
desire to replace their fathers and marry their mothers. He also believed that boys
developed a superego which explained boys interest with superheroes and
weapons as an unconscious impulse to murder their fathers 15 (Berger300) As for
girls, Freud believed that they too wanted to replace the same sex parent, their
mothers, in order to be intimate with their fathers. This was known as the Electra
complex. Freud believed that children associate themselves with the same sex
parent through identification by copying their behavior, ideas and opinions.
Behaviorists believe that gender roles are learned as a result of punishment, a boy
being called a sissy for crying, or reinforcement, a boy being told he was tough for
not crying. Children also learn gender specific roles through social learning,
watching a mother cook or a father fix the car. Cognitive theory is based on gender
schema; a mental framework that organizes and guides a childs understanding of
gender as well as adopts the behavior of the people of their own sex, girls play with
dolls and boys play with trucks. 16 Sociocultural theory is gender divisions that are
appropriate and necessary among various cultures which may include gender
specific dress, different activities and schools. In attempt to break through the
gender walls some individuals choose to define themselves as humans rather than
by their gender. This is known as androgyny, a balance of both masculine and
feminine qualities in a person.17(Berger 303) Epigenetic theory is the belief that
gender behavior distinctions are based on different hormones, testosterone in boys
and estrogen in girls, affecting the brain. These genetic origins can be altered,
enhanced or halted by ones environment 18(Berger304).
13 Berger
14 Berger
15 Berger
16 www.zeepedia.com
17 Berger
18 Berger

The emotional development of our children is a self-fulfilling prophecy, each

generation of children is impacted by the environment that is set by the last
generation; and in turn that generation will grow into the archetypes that they
experienced during their early stages of development.

Bibliography

http://aappublications.org American Academy of Pediatrics

Berger, Kathleen Stassen. The Developing Person through Childhood and
Adolescent. New York: Worth Publishing, 2008
Carlson, Frances M. Planning for Safe Rough Play. Teaching Young
Children/Preschool. Volume 5 Number 4, (April/May2012): pp. 18-20
http://ideas.time.com. Ferguson, Christopher J. Sandy Hook Shooting, Video Games
Blamed, Again, December 20, 2012
www.Seattlechildrens.org Watching Violent TV at Preschool Age Linked to Aggression
in Young Boys, November 3, 2009
http://zeepedia.com Gender Issues in Psychology (PSY-512)