Formative feedback

Student name
Course/Unit
Type of tutorial
(eg video/audio/written)

Lucy Macpherson
FiP
Written

Student number
Assignment

515802
1

Overall Comments
This is a promising first assignment. Theres something consistent and visually mature about
your vision of Manchester here. And I think this is reflected in your response to Dan Holdsworths photo as a psychological landscape of mystery and strangeness. You write about
his work having no people in it and your series from rooftops in Manchester also has no one in
them and Id say has a certain strangeness about it - like pictures of an abandoned city.
Making a series of photos from a high vantage point on the top level of an empty car park, on
an overcast day, has really given this work a particular mood. It doesnt just feel like a collection of compositions about shapes and lines. It feels, at times, like an expression of alienation
or distance. This is something cities can do, because of the absence of natural forms, trees and
nature. But also because the city towers above us in a self-important way.
This work hangs together really well as a consistent series. It seems to make more sense to
view it as a series than as individual pictures. Youve managed to connect several views and
give a developing impression of place and mood.
Feedback on assignment
Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Quality of Outcome, Demonstration of Creativity
1
Visually the work is interesting because the images are almost monochrome. This first shot is
more coloured, but it comes across as tonal. I like the way youve composed the dark patches
of the car park - they resonate with the angular buildings around them.
One of the most common problems with photographing city-scapes is that vertical and horizontal lines can be slanted or wide-angle lenses can cause a pin cushion effect and warp
images. Your horizon in this picture looks likes its leaning to the right. You can easily fix this
1

in Photoshop but its much better to get it right when youre making the picture so you dont
have to crop into the image. You should also look into using the Lens Correction filter in Photoshop or in Camera RAW.
2
This is my favourite photo. It recalls the planes and light in some of Laura Letinskys work
(youll get to that later in the course).Youve sort of created a Berlin Wall division between the
car park area and the skyscrapers poling out beyond. Its visually satisfying, but thats because
it emphasizes a feeling well.
3
You could try this work in black and white and see what happens. This picture would, I think,
benefit from monochrome but it would also make it more graphic.
4
This is also a strong picture of an eerie empty space. I prefer it when the lens isnt warping the
image.
5
Another really good one which places the horizon quite high and makes the distant buildings
just a thin dark line. Its also interesting to have captured two levels and that the space is big
enough to feel expansive. You are emphasizing the size with a wide-angle lens, but you need
to correct it because its warping a bit. Unless off course that is an artistic choice.
The quality of the diffused light really makes this one work because the tone of the concrete
car park is the same as the sky.
6
I like the way youve consistently used the car park in the foreground, but here youve made it
a lot bigger and it has the effect of emphasizing the division and the alienation.
Coursework
Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Demonstration of Creativity
The coursework looks extensive and good. I can see that you are experimenting with visual
ideas and learning how to play with the camera and with image making. Your coursework
shows visual confidence and ability.
Learning Log
Your learning log looks well organized and its easy to navigate. You dont have to write the
briefs of all the exercises. The main thing is to do the work and then to put your own evaluation of it on the blog.
Suggested reading/viewing
Context
Have a look at Beate Gutschows work online. Particularly the grey urban composites. They
may resonate with you.

Pointers for the next assignment

The next assignment will take some practice to get right. Experiment with the process of
painting with a torch and then see what you can discover with it.
Good luck with it.
Robert Enoch
17th May 2016
1st August 2016

Tutor name
Date
Next assignment due