Baby Shcedullar

THE BABY
SCHEDULE
RULER
THE BABY
SCHEDULE
RULER
Dee Rule
Copyright © 2008 by Dee Rule
All Rights Reserved
Dee Rule Publishers, New York
No part of this book may be copied or reproduced, transformed

or stored in any form or manner including recording, retrievable system,
or electronic storage without the author’s written permission.
ISBN-13 978-0-9801261-0-5
Contents
Testimonials… … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … 7
Acknowledgments … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … 11
Introduction… Why Start Your Baby on a Schedule? … … … … … 13
Chapter 1… Why the Majority of Babies I’ve Worked with
Sleep through the Night … … … … … … … … … 19
Chapter 2… What Can a Baby Do for Its Parents? … … … … … 27
Chapter 3… Creative Parental Imagination … … … … … … … 33
Chapter 4… The Parental Persistence: Feeding Times and
Schedule Formation … … … … … … … … … … 47
Chapter 5… Ways to Calm Down a Fussy Baby … … … … … … 61
Chapter 6… Proper Swaddling and Putting Baby
Down to Sleep Rule … … … … … … … … … … 73
Chapter 7… Baby Bath Ruler and Daily Activities … … … … … 83
Chapter 8… The Baby Burping Ruler … … … … … … … … … 93
Chapter 9… Good Habits/Bad Habits Ruler… … … … … … … 97
Chapter 10… Breastfeeding Woes Cure Ruler and
the Daddy Blues Ruler… … … … … … … … … … 105
Conclusion… … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … 123
End Notes… … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … 129
Testimonials
“Dee Rule loves being with children, and she has devel-
oped a personal connection with each of our boys. I’ve
learned a lot from being with her and watching her as we
spend time with those babies. She is very discreet person
in our home, and we have all benefited from her care and
professionalism.”
—Holly Hunter
Actor and Academy Award winner
THE AMAZING DEE!

“What we would have done without you? … In the short
time you were here, you taught us so much about being
parents. … You have an unbelievable wealth of knowledge
that needs to be shared with the whole world. This isn’t
the end, only the beginning of a great, lifelong friendship.
I consider you part of a lifelong friendship. I consider you
to be part of the family forever; you will be in our lives
whether you like it or not! Good luck with the book. Love
you so much!”
—Oliver Hudson
Actor, Rules of Engagement
7
8 Dee Rule
“Dee Rule arrived on the scene and immediately put me

at ease. Her guidance and support was absolutely invalu-
able to me and my husband. In addition … Dee served as
an excellent teacher. She helped us establish a schedule,
taught us how to bathe, change, and care for our child,
and gave us helpful hints for addressing future chal-
lenges … We will always be grateful to Dee for the love
and support she provided during this time of major tran-
sition in our family, and we’ll be calling on her again. We
recommend her to you wholeheartedly.”
—Kate Bullinger Koops
New York
“Dee Rule’s help in welcoming our triplets into this

world has been priceless … she has been superb, imper-
turbable, highly skilled … for our children and a strong
and graceful pillar of support to us parents … she took
three babies from little tiny preemies to seventeen-pound
behemoths who have in all respects caught up with their
full-term peers. All of them were sleeping through the
night in the same room by ten weeks … Dee is a steady,
affectionate woman possessed of the utmost discretion
and professionalism. Her adaptability to the household
suggests to us that she could get along with just about with
anyone anywhere with any particular routine one might
imagine. She is also an excellent teacher. There are tricks
to handle multiples, and what had seemed to us an over-
whelming situation and an impossible learning curve, she
made far less daunting and far more fun.
The Baby Schedule Ruler 9
“In short, we love Dee and would keep her ’til the kids
were off and married. But we know there are other babies
and moms out there who need her more than we do now.
We recommend her to you with all our heart”
—Diane and David Self
Screenwriter and Producer
“She entered our home when we were completely fraz-

zled and immediately brought order and serenity. Our
babies began to sleep longer and eat better through her
introduction of a more structured bedtime routine and
are now sleeping six hours at a stretch through the night.
As a new mother, I really appreciated her ability to be a
great source of expertise and help without being pushy or
controlling. Equally important, her presence allowed me
to get enough rest and recuperate much faster.”
—Sara Allan
“It is with great pride and enthusiasm that we write a

letter of gratitude and appreciation in recognition of the
outstanding work.”
—Dr. Philip J. Weintraub
Internist and Cardiologist
“Dee is one of the kindest, most wonderful people I have

ever met. I trusted Dee Rule with the most precious trea-
sures, my children. I am endlessly grateful for all her help
and support.”
—Elizabeth Brady
The Baby Schedule Ruler is dedicated to
Elaine and Ayana
God rest their souls.
And to my dad, Rupert, who always encouraged me.
Acknowledgments
T
he Baby Schedule Ruler provides raw information for all
to use to help achieve a satisfying life with a newborn
or toddler. I thank Erinn and Oliver Hudson for the
use of baby Wilder’s photo for the cover design. About eighty
percent of this book was written in the nursery, in the dark on
my Palm Pilot phone.
I used a helpful editing network to deliver to all people
true insights and feelings without strict outside interference.
Also, I wanted to keep the contents of the book secure. I didn’t
want to risk great exposure of these techniques until the book
was completely published. My goal in writing this book is to
provide a simple and fast way for parents to feel comfortable
taking care of their newborns.
Certain parts of The Baby Schedule Ruler, was written to
highlight or communicate to different social backgrounds. I
didn’t want to leave out any type of lifestyle living. It would be
so wrong to give more attention to a single parental idea.
It has become like a renewal of life, and it gives me great
joy to express some of these special moments. I hope you will
find the information inside to be very powerful and exception-
ally helpful. I wanted to keep the flow of language as if I were
in your home working as your personal private-duty helper.
Thank you for welcoming me into your home and trusting my
craft and art.
I have the utmost respect for my celebrity clients and for
all the good times we’ve spent together. I respect their lives
and honor their families. Also, all of my clients are stars in
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my heart meaning all families I took care of who are just like
you. Thank you for all your support and love. No information
inside speaks about my clients in any negative manner. They
all have been wonderful and loving to me.
All of the three schedule divisions of The Baby Schedule Ruler
are made to fit in your life. If you need to push an hour forward
or backward, please do so; The Baby Schedule Ruler is flexible for
your busy day.
Introduction
Why Start Your Baby

on a Schedule?
If one feels the need of something grand, something infi-

nite, something that makes one feel aware of God, one
need not go far to find it. I think that I see something
deeper, more infinite, more eternal than the ocean in the
expression of the eyes of a little baby when it wakes in
the morning and coos or laughs because it sees the sun
shining on its cradle.
—Vincent van Gogh
I
have more than eighteen years of experience caring for
preemies, newborns, and children. I’ve seen it all, but I
must say you can never stop learning how to make things
better. For the families whose babies I’ve taken care of, learn-
ing has become an art. I specialize in twins and triplets, and
I’ve seen new perspectives in this area of childcare. By getting
involved in multiples cases, I took a massive and very impor-
tant turn in my profession. I have felt a strong elevation of
skills, love, respect, and insight that my hospital experience
could not have delivered. But working at a New York Hospital
helped constructed a solid ground for me to leap from and
grow—to go to the next level in infant care.
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I’ve mastered my art. For so many years, I’ve struggled and

fought to dissect my work.
I want to share with all people my advice for helping new
parents release the stigma or judgment of others, “You’re a
first-time parent. It’s not easy.” I want to share with all people
my advice for helping parents who can or cannot afford my
private at-home services as an independent traveling baby
nurse to become, as I’ve grown to become, an insider to their
newborn’s peace and a guardian of their baby’s full and restful
sleep and happiness.
“The best way to make children good is to make them

happy.”
—Oscar Wilde
Yes, you can be happy now by changing the way you take
care of your new baby or by incorporating a better way to
accomplish this. Just make sure when you’ve made up your
mind to do The Baby Schedule Ruler that you know that you are
doing the best service you can—not only for your baby, but
also for your whole family.
How do parents get through the day with their new
responsibilities? I will discuss the important things to do to
accomplish this main task. Parents will gain confidence in
everything they do. I will express most of what is lacking in
a lot of childcare books, and that is the insider knowledge. I
will share the wisdom and experience of being with newborn
single babies, twins, and triplets twenty-four hours a day, seven
days a week with only occasional breaks (two to three days off
a month, and sometimes just one day off a month, depending
on a family’s needs). Every family and newborn is different,
and this difference always requires a new way for me, the baby
nurse, to diagnose and adapt to the family’s needs. We all have
a unique lifestyle. By writing The Baby Schedule Ruler, I can share
with all parents a way to go about their days according to their

lifestyles. I want all people to view the schedules and practice
all the Baby Schedule Ruler chapters one diaper at a time and be
successful!
We will develop proper skills like daily feeding times and
amounts, breastfeeding, taking walks with your baby at least
once a day, activities, baths, massages, proper burping, and
most of all, scheduling. I will teach you the truth about being
flexible with a baby and how to use flexibility for the advance-
ment of your child as well as how to be inflexible and reap the
sleep rewards. It’s normal for babies to be fussy, and sometimes
the best efforts cannot work.
If you could live night and day in a baby’s world, you would
be astonished at its delicacy and surreality; to be a part of it
all will make you feel so blessed. Being here to learn all you
can to advance your awareness of your newborn is wonderful.
If you remain true to this road map, you will find that like
many families, it will give you overwhelming success and peace
of mind. To all who’ve trusted my judgment and reaped all
the great benefits that these skills provide, please know I have
loved your little one with all my heart and studied him or her
to the fullest to write and finish The Baby Schedule Ruler. Thank
you for listening with trust. To make this book possible, you are
the true rulers.
The one thing I ask of you is to read the book twice to
enhance your understanding of some of these new techniques.
I also ask you to go out and teach these skills to loved ones,
friends, and family. Also, I realize we understand more when
we express and show the type of care we want for our children.
People will not feel alienated because of the course of care
you hope to accomplish for your family. Sometimes it can be
difficult to get people to see it your way. But it’s good to teach
friends and family all what you want them to understand.
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“A book is a garden, an orchard, a storehouse, a party,

a company by the way, a counselor, a multitude of
counselors.”
—Henry Ward Beecher
American politician (1813–1887)
I asked myself the other day: who do you love? Without

the things and people I love, where would I be, how would
I live, and what job would I have? I would certainly feel very
depressed if I was separated from the things I love, like music
and the arts, going to the Metropolitan Museum in New York,
being with friends, going to shows, reading a book, enjoying
the spa, singing my favorite songs, telling hysterical jokes to
friends, and creating something worthwhile. I asked, “Who do
you love?” to parents, took it to the streets of New York, and
charted the responses.
Most parents who have children in schools from daycare
to high school answered that they loved their cars, homes, last
vacations, children, fathers, pet Oscar, or simply themselves.
These answers were not so amazing, but what I noticed was the
order people gave me. Most of the parents (five out of ten)
spoke of their children second, third, or fourth. This is not
to suggest they don’t love their children, but what intrigued
me was that when a newborn has become a part of families
I’ve worked for, they’ve put their infants first. They’ve told me,
“Dee, my child is first and foremost in my life, and everything
revolves around him.” I wondered what could have possible
happened over the years for some parents to see things a little
differently. Maybe they got tied up in all society wants every
day, the needs of loving something material, or just following
a trend they see others following like buying homes, cele-
brating with friends, or going to the blow out sale of the week.
I thought of what happens to some new parents who put away
those things they loved to do frequently before their babies

were born.
The first year of life is full of new adventures and activi-
ties directed to the baby. We get comfortable with our little
ones growing up, and we gradually begin to care about or
pay attention to those things we so used to love doing. What
in the world happens to fun times and creative involvement
when a baby comes home from the hospital? I have seen that
it almost comes to a stop in some families and causes much
hardship. But I’ve witnessed that if we can combine the daily
love of things we enjoy doing, being a part of it all (society),
and getting creative after just having a baby, we as humans can
certainly be happy again. This is the fountain of youth—to
love oneself while being a parent, keep the mind moving to
improve, and to be the unique you.
Put on your best, look good, and keep up your hygiene.
Being a mother doesn’t mean forgetting about yourself. Look
good every day, not just when it’s important to wear makeup.
Even on a walk, let your hair blow in the air. You’re alive, not
about to be committed in the psychiatric department of a
hospital. No more complaints of not having time—make time.
Call a friend over for an hour, tell your family to stop in, and
hit the shower, go to the spa, have a pedicure, and visit the hair
dresser and tell her you’re having a good day. I personally love
the book Making Faces by Kevyn Aucoin. He teaches you how
to be glamorous, because you’re the only one that can create
a positive you. Oh yes, stop listening to horrible opinions from
nosy people who need to mind their own business. We don’t
need adult babies to host.
Putting on make-up is not the only way to look or feel posi-
tive, doing good deeds are far more important. We can help
out our favorite charities or volunteer in our communities.
This gives a great feeling of hope and purpose, a respect of
life. Being handy to friends by listening and expressing your
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opinions sometimes can be stressful depending on the topic

but is also healing.
Keep those encouraging friends or family around you.
With all the difficult times you’ve endured, you need peace.
This peace can only start in your mind and around you. Taking
good care of yourself is the same as taking good care of your
baby. Why would you want to treat yourself worse than your
baby?
Chapter 1
Why the Majority of

Babies I’ve Worked with
Sleep through the Night
The line between failure and success is so fine that we

scarcely know when we pass it; so fine that we are often on
the line and do not know it.
—Elbert Hubbard
I
’ve worked for a lot of families who are very educated.
Success is a must. They are all celebrities and stars to
me. I’ve lived their lives for a portion of time, residing in
homes of beauty, elegance, peace, and solitude.
What a time for them—to embrace me when I walked
through their doors at almost the same time their newborns
arrived at home. For some of my clients, it was their first child
and for some it was their second, third, or fourth. No matter
how many children they had, what was so difficult for all my
clients is letting me, Dee Rule, the baby nurse, inside from
the outside. I’ve arrived like the delivery of twins, but the big
difference is that I am a stranger whom they can ask for advice
on infant and child care. What trust they have had in me to
deliver nothing but the best with respect to their families and
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homes. To be a servant was a joy. Living with and working for

these families weren’t two different things. To work and live
with my families was one and the same; this was the key to
pleasing my families. I saw my relationship with them as the
family worker. I became the family member they always wanted
who knew when to help out and when not to. It was imperative
for them to trust me fully.
All these years of being the ruler of the baby schedule would
never have worked out for me if I had been selfish and pushy or
disrespectful of my clients’ priorities. First, I was picked by my
families; second, I needed to gain their total trust; and third, I
needed to be calm and respect their homes and lifestyles.
It was very important for me to give these families honor
and respect to let them live their lives in comfort and with
ease. I’ve made it my number one priority to allow my clients
the privacy to deeply bond with their newborns. Also, it was my
business to give my families attention, dedication, and advice
and to answer all of their questions clearly.
There is so much joy for me to give these families more
value than they paid me. I needed to get paid, but during the
early days of working with babies and families, I began to wake
up to a realization that the majority of the babies and families
I have worked for sleep through the night while other nurses
in my profession weren’t accomplishing this for their newborn
families. The babies these nurses worked for were still eating
two or three times in the night while my three-months-olds—
whether they were born single, twin, triplet, preemie, or a just
normal baby—were ahead of them all in sleep and the ability
to communicate.
My babies were sleeping nine to twelve hours on average.
It was a total success for my families, and they loved me very
much. But why, I asked myself, was I accomplishing great daily
activities and communication and inheriting restful babies
that achieved deep, sound sleep at night?
I realized that there was something different about my

approach to these babies and families that nobody else could
figure out. Therefore, I went about taking notes of my daily
and nightly life with babies and saw how differently I would
approach each family. The reality that I deciphered was in the
applications and theories of patience and the step of converting
my lifestyle to their lifestyles. By doing these things, I all of
a sudden became like another newborn baby. By observing
the families as a child, I learned to come to some conclusions
about the way the baby wanted to live with its parents and the
way these families could adapt to their newborn’s journey in
this world.
Many of my clients gave me huge bonuses and incentives
when the job was over. They even told me, “You deserve more,”
“You should charge more,” or “Your worth is almost price-
less.” But it was worth more to me to learn from the families.
They taught me how to live and understand their lifestyles—
how they wanted to live and behave in their homes. With this
helpful knowledge, I wanted even more information on babies
with families and about everyone’s personalities and wants. It
gave me the willpower to see and be with more families and to
continue being the Baby Schedule Ruler.
This knowledge came from within myself as much as it
came from the babies and their loved ones. Tapping into the
deep cares of my families amplified the joy of having a new
family addition. My families became less worried knowing that
I came to help them understand their little ones better. They
were patient with me and were so happy to hear my insights
and interpretations. All along I steered them to leap into this
new baby world by listening and see the results they craved, for
it’s almost a miracle to people to get to know their babies as
they grow.
I believe babies hold a special gift for mankind. This gift is
deepness of need, want, care, comfort, love, charity, and the
22 Dee Rule
beginning of forming the self. They all have taught me about

me—the “parent" me; the “baby" me. These (mes) are great,
and it wants someone sometimes and nothing at other times.
The most helpful insight I discovered is that the baby doesn’t
know what it wants and needs, leaving us adults to figure it out.
They remind me of us adults when we just don’t know what
we want—we’re lost in what direction we should take, and we
become alienated in our everyday lives. This eventually leaves
us to take what we can get from others, sometimes not knowing
where we are going to land or be. What is going to happen to
us? But we’re adults, and we have our options; they’re babies,
and we usually think we need to give them more and more
food, because maybe that’s what they really want.
Food is so good, refreshing, and fulfilling, but it is not
always the answer. This holds true for babies. When my babies
are on a schedule, it benefits all of us because we can discern if
the baby is hungry, tired, or just overtired, or if the baby needs
to poop. By scheduling, we have a road map, a navigational
tool, to figure out what the baby needs based on what time it is.
Now we have created time for the baby. The baby doesn’t have
a watch, but it will begin to remember time. Its tummy will tell
the baby that it is hungry around feeding time.
We have rules in our lives that can empower or disempower
us. I saw that it was a big benefit for families to show their chil-
dren rules that gave them positive reinforcement. Scheduling
will help families avoid confusion about what the baby or child
wants. The baby will see, if I do this and that, I will get these
types of feelings in return.
You’re the parent, and you set the standards—the rules—
by scheduling. Remember, a child came into this world not
knowing any rules; we are left to direct his or her day in a
positive way. We must be dedicated to these rules so we can
have positive results. If you’re not getting positive results with
your baby, then you need to change the rules so they give the
response you want.
Put into practice these rules by scheduling, and you will be
happy and satisfied with this new beginning.
Some professionals cannot teach you about baby sched-
uling or having a routine for babies because they have not
lived for eighteen years with newborns, twins, and triplets,
observing their habits nonstop like I have. Some medical profes-
sionals prefer to tell you something negative about scheduling
because they do not know how to direct you and your baby
into a routine; therefore, saying scheduling is not good gives
them a way out of trying to answer for their lack of exposure.
God forbid they might lose you as a client and the money they
will collect from the insurance company for years of service to
you. However, there are many truthful people in the medical field, and
we should all be grateful for their service.
I’ve found that successful people I’ve worked for and other
dominating personalities in sports, science, the arts, politics,
business, theater, acting, and other innovative areas all have
achieved their goals in life by setting rules that gave them a
positive feeling. Through these rules, they obtained greatness.
Success can never be achieved by having conflicting rules. I’ve
found that by being persistent at practicing schedules and
enjoying the positive results, you can strengthen the family
structure. At the end of all my jobs, I can only hope to obtain
this by leaving a happy, sleep-tight-at-night, loving baby.
Every family is different and interprets things differently,
just like their babies. I saw that these differences detract from
getting the babies to sleep in the night; these differences gave
me the solutions of how to best manage, develop, and interpret
things in a way they could feel comfortable without forcefully
changing their visions of what they expected or wanted to
do with the new family addition. Here is my key to success. I
developed this key by constantly asking myself, “What if I was
24 Dee Rule
the baby? What would I need to happen during the days to

make me feel happy?" I would need a lot of patience from
my parents; I would need sleep and food. I would need love
and discipline in order to live in peace with everybody. I would
need a map, like The Baby Schedule Ruler.
Through the benefits of the baby and family following
this advice, the family entity becomes more solid. Mommy
and Daddy can have time for each other. They can return to
romantic moments, go on dates with one another, see a movie,
or go on an adventure, and when they return home, they know
that they can sleep all night and love their little one in the
morning. The parents I’ve worked for can tell by seeing what
time it is if it is time for the baby to eat or sleep. By knowing
the time through scheduling, the parents can organize their
business affairs, hair dresser appointments, gym workouts, rest
time, important phone conversations, grocery store visits, and
as a matter fact, any type of visit or personal responsibility. Life
continues at a manageable pace.
Through The Baby Schedule Ruler, I wanted to show all fami-
lies the path I’ve taken to accomplish the goals that my past
families have achieved through my guidance of their parental
instincts. There was something very special about the hands-
on care I gave and the cooperation that I received from my
families that was very important for me to write about. The
families were very pleased with the progress I made for them
in establishing a routine so they could have some flexibility,
and it amazed them, their friends, and their families.
There are a ton of books on baby and child care, and they
were made with good intentions, but none can reveal the
consistent results I’ve obtained. I always wonder how many of
these writers have lived in the homes of families for twenty-
four hours a day for months on end. I wonder how many of
these experts sleep in a baby’s room to hear and respond to his
or her needs twenty-four hours a day. I guess that some are just
writing a book that serves the purpose of a reference guide that

will help many families understand and correlate many of the
experiences—good or bad—that they are going through. But
many cannot give a schedule that will get the results families
desire from their little ones, like sleeping through the night
and gaining the right attention span to communicate or just
to look around and respond to all the stimuli the environment
contains. Giving more to the masses is my delight. I love to tell
everyone that there is a sound way to go about your day and be
happy with a new baby. This book is for you—enjoy.
Today I went to central park for my afternoon walk with
the baby. She was asleep, and I parked the stroller next to a
bench that another little baby and her mom sat on. We looked
at each other, and the mother said, “What a cute baby. How
old is she?”
I replied, “Ten weeks old. And your little one?”
“She is five months. Is your baby sleeping through the
night?" she asked.
“She has slept all night long since she was eight weeks old,”
I said. You could imagine her face—it was as if I were exag-
gerating. I continued, “She goes down at 8:00 PM and doesn’t
feed until six or seven in the morning.” Her mouth hung open
like a whale’s. You would think she was going to bite a shark.
She wanted to know the secret, and I replied, “With proper
routine night and day, you can achieve anything.” The baby
began to fuss a little, and I continued my walk. One week later,
the same mother saw my employer and myself walking happily
in the park with the baby. She could not help herself, and she
stopped us and introduced herself.
“Hi, I’m Cassie. I met your baby about a week ago,” she
said. “Is it true your baby sleeps through the night?”
“Without a peep!" said my boss.
This time without catching sharks in her jaw, she said,
“What? That’s so nice!”
Chapter 2
What Can a Baby Do

for Its Parents?
B
abies can give us a purpose—to live a better life. They
can put us onto the track of perfection and help us
to become unselfish. Having a little one pulls us into
reality. We can really think of what’s best first. Situations are
resolved for the sake of the baby. Think of the joy you will feel
when your baby comes home or the moment your doctor says
you have a boy or a girl. The key words are “you have.” You’re
a loving person. Just learn from the baby.
A baby is here to help the parents see reality. The truth
through a baby’s eyes is so blunt and direct. It will hit hard and
should help make you the best you can be. If you’re not ready
to be awakened to this truth, then don’t start, because you will
only go backward in self-development. You won’t learn a thing.
You might be thinking, “What do you mean?" A child is an
offspring of you and an infant has its own personality as well.
You have something like you with its own habits and wants to
deal with now. This is what it means to be a parent.
I just heard the announcer calling my flight to Los Angeles.

I have to go, but I will continue on this critical topic.
28 Dee Rule
7:30 AM: I am on the plane. I just want to get a few words

down before takeoff.
I realize as a parent you become less judgmental of other

people’s children. You possess more patience. Things that used
to bother you—like a crying baby on an airplane or children
playing loudly outside or inside—will not phase you anymore.
Driving a little more safely and a lot less recklessly is some-
thing that often happens when a baby enters a family and is
achieved in different ways. Some parents will put up a sign
(“Baby On Board” or “Drive Safely”). We become more aware
of other people’s safety and our own. Parents will purchase
a bigger car—a van or SUV in place of their small sedans—
for major voyages. Some car manufacturers have even taken
advantage of the family expansion trend. They did more for
parents by introducing new gadgets like rearview cameras so
you can see as you move your vehicle backward.
It’s a good thing to have a baby around. Something has
happened to our thinking. We finally get it—we’re not teen-
agers anymore! Risky business will have to wait! What happened?
Did lightning strike? Maybe! Just maybe we needed a knockout
to realize it’s not only about us!
When you have a baby, you’ll also have a little more patience
with your fellow adults. At least for a while! Rushing to go out
the door is nearly impossible because getting through that
door to run errands takes a long time when you have a baby.
No matter how hard you try to be on time, time seems to move
faster than you realize. It’s not all about you anymore. I can
attest to the fact that mothers get to this point way faster than
fathers, maybe because they carried the baby for nine months
as it grew inside the womb, its home. As the days and the weeks
pass by, mothers are always concerned about the baby. Is it
growing properly, and how much does it weigh? Is it a boy or
a girl? Where is it located? Besides these constant questions,
mothers can feel the baby move inside them—it can kick and
have a lot of hiccups.
Some dads go about their business without a physical,
consistent, emotional attachment to the baby. The baby
doesn’t send them to the bathroom constantly or move inside
them randomly. For nine months of growth in their mommies,
these babies dictated space and movement and spawned feel-
ings of curiosity like, what is the baby going to look like? Then
the baby arrives, and it becomes time for Daddy to start feeling
all of the growth pains. Silently they go through some depres-
sion (but not all dads). It hits them almost like a tackle on the
football field by the defensive linebacker. As fathers become
conscious, reality becomes evident. The game is on—get up
and win! The baby is here to be loved always. Watch it grow.
Participate and you’ll feel better. I am so happy that all of my
clients have connected with their babies from conception. It’s
important for all family members to come and help out in
some way as well. Call them, and they will be very happy to do
something for you.
We get emotionally attached to our babies, leaving us a
small margin of error to mess up without pain. But pain allows
growth and rejuvenation of our minds. We then think of what’s
best for the baby. We start asking ourselves if we’re doing things
right. Is there a better way to take care of him? Am I a good
parent? Self analysis will take over our lives, pushing us to be
better—forcing us to grow up.
Historian Arnold Toynbee wrote In the Law of Challenge and
Response. He believed if civilization met a life-threatening chal-
lenge and overcame it by using all of its greatest efforts, will,
zeal, or strength, we would advance our very lives and every-
thing around us. Trouble has a way of lifting us up when we
take it on and overcome all obstacles by removing problems
and acting to solve them. When all is settled and at peace, our
30 Dee Rule
civilization will advance art, music, architecture, and all aspects

of life.
I’ve seen people write books on their troubles and how
they managed to come out of despair or depression. The
Greeks overcame the Persian Empire centuries ago and devel-
oped theater, philosophy, art, and crafts. It made them better
people and an advancing race. They fought hard for many
years, and when it was all over, the most incredible things had
happened.
Let incredible things happen for your family. Do not love
problems, but find ways to get out of them besides complaining
and being down. Be creative and your worries will heal. Having
a new baby helps us to see life overflowing with opportunities
and hope of survival.
I’ve seen the spirit grow up in new parents. And by spirit I
mean responsibility and the will to take note of other people’s
needs. The baby is this needy being who wants us to take
responsibility for it to grow up loved. That’s why peace and
love starts at home.
What if we became babies again; wouldn’t we want the
same from our parents? It’s that deep look at things that will
bring about a reality check on life. The newborn has brought
us much life in bundles of awareness and care—not just for
the newborn but also for ourselves. It’s the best chapter in our
lives.
Intuition in Action
3:40 AM
I woke up and sensed something was wrong. I picked the

baby up and thought, This is not the same baby I left a day ago. He
is pale and seems dehydrated. I went to get the mother as I prayed
and said, “We need to go to the hospital right now!” She got
the car, and we called the pediatrician and proceeded toward
the hospital. The newborn was admitted for a month. His
doctors didn’t know what was wrong in the beginning, but it
turned out to be an allergy problem. He could not have wheat
products, poultry, or dairy products.
Charlie is a twin and was born a preemie. We were lucky.
The mom had another set of twins that were eighteen months
old at the time—that’s no typing error, eighteen months old.
They had just moved to a new big home to accommodate all
their needs. “One morning, the mother said, ’I don’t think he’s
ready for circumcision.’” Take a look at him, Dee!" She didn’t
know what brought her to say that. It was just a feeling she had.
I had just returned from a day break when she told me this.
We had the Bris. The very next day we took him to the hospital
because he didn’t look like the baby we knew so well. He was
pale and just not looking healthy. He drank well throughout
the day and previous night, but something just wasn’t right.
Before the ceremony, she asked the doctor to look at him
because he looked sick to her, but she believed we had nothing
to be worried about. “He looks fine. He’s a preemie, and he
is ready for circumcision today.” We had the circumcision and
went home. We trusted the doctor, but something was both-
ering us deeply. It bothered me, and I watched him carefully
that night. I couldn’t wait until the morning. He ate well, but I
wanted to see him in the morning sunlight that comes through
the window. Looking at him as the daylight reflects off his face
in the nursery, I said to the mother, “Charlie is very sick. We
have to take him to the hospital.” He had no fever and ate very
well. But that thing named intuition pricked at our guts like a
surgeon’s knife and kept on digging deeper. We thank God for
it, because Charlie overcame and is doing well.
I am so grateful for the mother who was in tune to the
situation. After all, Charlie is her son. Whatever you want to
32 Dee Rule
call intuition, at least recognize that it is real. The existence

of this spirit is so underrated in our society. Schools should
teach more about this gift. It’s beyond common sense. There is
nothing greater than a message that is right on. Denial might
delay its effectiveness. But doing what your soul feels can reap
better results than some educated intelligence.
Chapter 3
Creative Parental
Imagination
We don’t like their sound, and guitar music is on the way

out.
—Decca Recording Co.
Rejected the Beatles, 1962
W
orking as a baby nurse for all types of people
and cultures, I’ve learned a tremendous amount
from the parents I’ve worked for. I would tell all
of my families that they are my greatest teachers. When I ex-
pressed this to them, they could never see the deep meaning
in what I said. I really meant this. I didn’t just say it to show
them I am very humble and conscious of their likes and dis-
likes while living in their home. I speak candidly about this be-
cause it has elevated me as a helper by allowing me to observe
the moment-by-moment decisions a parent of a newborn must
make day in and out—at night, on weekends, with friends and
family, while driving a car, or on vacations. Making decisions
in very cold emotional climates in the face of strangers, fam-
ily, and older children who don’t want to share Mommy’s and
Dad’s attention is difficult.
A parent is the most powerful human being on this earth.
33
34 Dee Rule
They rule this universe and fill it with diversity, compassion,

patience, fun, joy, and goals to accomplish. They are amazing!
They take on the responsibility of getting to know another
human being who is usually made out of some portion of them-
selves. It’s so miraculous for me to witness history repeating
itself when I’m called to be the contract baby nurse for a set
time period. The feeling is so good and to put this on paper
makes me quiver inside. I am so touched at this moment to
share this private feeling. It is this insight that has made me fall
in love with what I’ve been doing for a living all these years.
The creativity in loving parents can solve some or all of
the daily problems in raising a baby. A baby can be fussy for
countless reasons, and the soothing cure is in your hands. Of
course if you think that your little one is ill, then you must call
a medical professional for help. That’s parenting! Be deeply
aware of strange behaviors in your child and never feel embar-
rassed to call for help.
The mind-bending evidence in this chapter is very deep
and real. I’ve observed the facts over my eighteen-year career,
month after month with parents of twins and triplets. What
I’ve observed is that your child will usually like what you like.
Think of and write about all the things you love, enjoy, and
dream about, because you have made another human being
almost as perfect as yourself. He even looks like you or a family
member—maybe your father or mother. You, the parent, know
your little one better than anybody. Teach yourself to learn as
a child, starting with your newest family member. Be a child!
Be a newborn!
What’s your definition of love? One thing I know is that
love starts with you!
Nobody can take care of your little one better than you
once you read and study these chapters and review the different
types of daily activities you need to do to get through the day.
You can achieve sound sleep and still be connected to all of
your relationships with other people and yourself. Your over-

whelming success will convince you and all those who thought
you could not be a good parent that you can be one.
Maybe you or others thought or feared you would leave
all the parental work to the caregiver—a baby nurse, nanny,
or babysitter. They will be proved more than wrong when you
show the world, friends, and family you learned to develop
creative parental imagination to rise above fear and worries with
the help of your doctor, who will reassure you on the progress
of your child’s development. As the weeks and months fly past,
you’ll become stronger, faster, and more alert to changes in
your newborn’s behavior, and you will not be petrified. You
know what to do and what you do you do extraordinarily better
than anyone else.
“Success is often provided by the exception to the rules

for success. People who have broken though color and
gender lines, class and culture bias, have done so despite
an array of reasons as to why they shouldn’t de able to do
so. In this way, success may ultimately have more to do
with your own personality, focus, and optimism than your
gender, race, or background. Put blinders on to those
things that conspire to hold you back, especially the ones
in your head. Guard your good mood. Listen to music
every day, joke, and love and read more for fun …”
—Meryl Streep, actress
Dr. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi states in Creativity, “Most of

us assume that artists—musicians, writers, poets, painters—
are strong on the fantasy side, whereas scientists, politicians,
and businesspeople are realist. This may be true in terms of
day-to-day routine activities. But when a person begins to work
creatively, all bets are off—the artist may be as much a realist as
the physicist, and the physicist as imaginative as the artist.” He
36 Dee Rule
continues, “In most cases it is the parents who are responsible

for stimulating and directing the child’s interest. Sometimes
the only contribution of the parents to their child’s intellec-
tual development is treating him or her like a fellow adult.”
Our little one wants to be treated well and involved with
humankind. She might be crying because she needs more
participation from the parent or caregiver. Stay in deep thought
with your child and think deeply about your child. She will
reveal to you what’s important to her. The great thing is that
she communicates more through silence than speech. Think!
Think! Think! Then don’t think too much. If you’re confused,
just view what’s happening silently, and you’ll understand your
little one more and provide for her needs.
Food is vital, and having shelter is a must. It means every-
thing for a child to interact with its parent; it’s stronger than
the attraction and need for food. Tests have shown this through
Harry Harlow’s experimental research with monkeys. He and
his wife went out of their way to study monkeys when other
scientists at that time (1950) concentrated their experiments
on rats. He was hailed for his great findings published in “The
Nature of Love.”
He built a surrogate mother from soft cloth and embedded
a lightbulb inside to provide warmth. These monkeys had a
soft cloth mother that provided food and another soft cloth
mother who was soft and warm but didn’t provide food To the
amazement of Harry Harlow, these monkeys desired the warm
surrogate mother more than the one that provided food. Wow!
It showed that mankind desires comfort and warmth first;
anything else is secondary.
I will tell you a story of a flight I took to California. I sat
in a three-row economy-class seat. There was a lady sitting to
the left of me. She put a book between her legs and mine. She
didn’t have another book, so she took the airplane commercial
magazine and stuck that between herself and the passenger to
the right of her. We fit in the seat perfectly. I didn’t mind her
peculiar nature until her head began to lean on my shoulder.
I nudged her a little to make her aware of the closeness. She
woke and apologized and went back to sleep. Once again I
became a pillow her conscious mind didn’t see. That’s the great
power of touch! Here I was thinking she didn’t want my leg to
touch hers, yet my shoulder came in handy. She then awoke
and apologized again. I smiled and said, “No problem!”
Some scientists have said Harry Harlow only discovered
what was common sense, but we all know common sense is not
too common for some people. It’s a gift to be on a common
sense level with the world; not all people understand what
common sense is. All infants and children must be close to you
and emotionally connected to the care you give.
Give your child an emotionally warm experience. Enjoy any
creativity you have developed throughout the years of growing
up, going to elementary school, going to high school, and
attending college or through experience with comedy shows
you’ve watched and laughed at. Be expressive! Be yourself! A
child wants to see you be you; then he can start being himself.
You can tell the foundation of a house is strong by first standing
on it. Showing that experience to your child first will send the
emotional signal to your baby—a feeling of security wrapped
up in emotions so he will feel comfortable to stand up and test
the house’s foundation. Visual experiences can make a differ-
ence for your child. Experience is a priceless teacher. Talk is
truly cheap sometimes!
No matter how many times you say no to toddlers, somehow
they will not obey unless they experience the meaning of no.
We hope they listen, but listening is a hard thing to expect
from a toddler. I give a special name to toddlers; I call them
“The First Human Innovators.” They will take a risk and keep
on risking until they have learned a better solution or a better
38 Dee Rule
way to do something (or until they figure out they just can’t
do it!).
You’re the leader; go first, and your child will follow.
Remember the game we played as children called Follow the
Leader? The leader performs first and all the kids must do
whatever the leader is doing. If he puts his hands on top of his
head, then all must follow. Those who don’t will be out of the
game. Do what you would prefer your little one to take, and
he/she will follow your movements. If you don’t move, he/she
will follow that too.
In The Naked Truth, Desmond Morris strongly expresses,
“The naked ape is a teaching ape.” As humans, we learn by
practicing or taking the direction of another. We gather all the
aspects we want to learn, learn them to the fullest, and perfect
them to our own taste or sense of style. Humans can be taught
anything and grow at a rapid pace. He Morris states, “We
acquire quickly by following the example of our parents.”
As we get older and, I hope, wiser, it is to our benefit to lift
our souls upward into creativity and not hesitate advance the
spirit we inherit. We can develop the spirit we’ve passed on to
our children. Convince yourself that you are the best parent.
Tell others of the great advancement your little one has made,
whether it is communicating better with you, reaching for
objects sooner than other children his age, rolling over, or
giggling at an early age.
Being creative can get rid of fear and low self-esteem. All
people can benefits from this. It must be put into practice.
There are benefits of the parent taking charge creatively. To
me, to be called a parent doesn’t mean that you are genetically
attached to the baby; it means you understand and take care
of your little one’s needs on a creative plane. It means evolving
and expanding into the depths of a new being’s mind. It means
learning to use the right distraction, touch, speech, or song to
awaken our senses. It means to know the right time to reframe
and go forward, to love and let go. I love these parents who just
love their little one for being unique and full of art. Parents
can keep up with the involvement of their baby.
Maybe you think you are not creative, that your mind
cannot think of different things to enjoy. Please take note
of the things you dream about and then make these dreams
come true with your little one. For example, if you enjoy opera,
mimic the sounds of Plácido Domingo and Luciano Pavarotti,
do the hand gestures, and imitate the enjoyment of being the
entertainer. Clap your hands in applause, and the baby will
respond in some way to the new action you are displaying.
I saw a documentary on MSNBC called Lock Up: San Quentin,
which is a state prison for the worst criminals. These people
have limited resources and do not have enough space to move
around or to construct anything that comes into their minds.
Everyday materials are not accessible. In these very small
spaces, one inmate created miniature bicycles for display out
of soap, toilet paper, foil, and water. Others have developed a
hobby of making flowers out of toilet paper for Mother’s Day
cards. Two inmates got to play chess every day because they
created chess pieces out of Kool-Aid, a piece of tissue paper,
and water. All they wanted to accomplish was to keep them-
selves busy until it was time to be paroled—they were serving
five years, twenty-two years to life, forty-five years to life, or
other long sentences. Some began to love tennis and taught
this sport that they normally would not have played when they
were out on the streets being criminals. These criminals found
ways out of boredom to help speed up the everyday confine-
ment. As one inmate put it, “You have to keep busy or you’ll
go crazy.”
One guy loved to paint murals on the wall. He got in touch
with art inside of him and got out of touch with the enemy (the
criminal) within that brought him there. How did he paint
the murals in his cell without a paintbrush? He clipped off
40 Dee Rule
pieces of his hair to make different brush sizes. I saw through

this program (which aired on December 1, 2007) that when
humans are pressured or confined, they can miraculously
transform their environment and social condition with their
imagination. Creativity truly shines.
In the business world, creativity is a must to survive and to
be effective in a very competitive market. You cannot survive
without the input of new ideas and the use of market research.
For me, market research is reading and studying in silence
the thought processes of babies and children and adults too.
Why even attempt to invest money into a project if you cannot
provide a vision for good future profits and success? One must
identify the results first and then produce the goods.
If happiness is to occur with a baby/toddler/child/adult,
we must have patience combined with zeal to make our happi-
ness happen now.
Donald Trump has set a standard on this. He wrote in
Think Big and Kick Ass in Business and in Life, “What do you
do when you are faced with a difficult problem? … You must
learn to thrive on problems. I face problems every day … If
you want to be in the top 2 percent, you must become very
good at finding creative solutions to what appear to be impos-
sible problems.” Problems don’t last forever; it is up to us to
decrease the amount of time these problems take up. The
sooner a problem is taken care of, the better you will feel.
If you want to endure misery, do not seek to be creative
with yourself and your little one. Keep an open mind; you’re as
free as you want to be. It will provide the greatest acceleration
of peace mixed with joy; it just can’t be measured. By keeping
your thoughts and sanity evolving through playtime, bath
time, walk time, and eating time, this imagination contains
unlimited levels of participation. Yes, we must participate with
the newborn constantly, and the newborn, just like ourselves,
requires alone time; and I’m talking about independence at
least once a day for some period of time. Why is it important

for infants or children to have a little time in the day for inde-
pendent play? Having your little one simply sitting in the chair
alone or in a play gym helps builds the foundation of their
constructive interpretive mind. Let her play alone until she
calls you with a squawk. The most powerful thing a human
possesses is the imagination. Being alone can kick it in. You
will see a very bright personality coming out of your baby. She
will seem to become highly active in what she is paying atten-
tion to. Try it and see. It is an eye-opening experience.
Today is a great time to be a dad. Many dads are working
from home and getting more daily hours to play and just cuddle
up with their children. In, “My Dad, American Inventor,” in
the New York Times on August 16, 2007, Stephanie Rosenbloom
showed how different dads are dealing with getting through
the day with their families. Dads are around the home and
family much longer than at any time in history. It’s great to see
strong dad involvement. Through long days and nights being
home spending time with their children, these dads began to
see how they can make things better.
One dad, Mr. Bacon, mentioned in the article invented a
car seat adaptor that hooks onto the rolling luggage people
carry when traveling. This all came about because he wondered
if there could be a better way to transport his child through
the airport and help free up his wife from pushing a stroller.
Mr. Bacon began to sell his Tote Tot—the car seat adaptor
for luggage. We as a society change because we look for what
people need. We improve our daily lives because we can change
our situation through solving problems using imagination and
creativity. This happens through a simple thought. If we feel
passionate enough about our cause, to our surprise, we can
often find the solution to the problem. If Mr. Bacon had not
been involved with his family’s needs every day and had just
gone along that day without any thought of making life better,
42 Dee Rule
he might not have discovered this useful adaptor for not just
his family to use but also for all families. You can go to www.
toteatot.com to get this magnificent adaptor.
Babies can copy all our gestures, speech, diction, walks,
and singing tones by putting their own images together inter-
pret their parents and family members. Free yourself from the
can’t do or the cannot be done voices of people around you but
inherit the attitude that you can do all things and be successful
always. Repeat the positive and disregard all negative. All good
creativity is brought about through positive thoughts of letting
change happen for our benefit. I just can’t repeat this enough.
Communicate with yourself first and dish out the desires of
your heart to be the greatest parent to yourself first and to
someone else, like your little one, second.
You’re amazing, and by being this amazing creature, you
are far above anything normal. You are worthy of creating your
own ideas that will work for your newborn and yourself. That’s
what incredible means! This sets you apart from all parents and
people—to find out for yourself that niche for your newborn
or child—the one and true thing that works to calm him down
and make him smile and laugh or be just goofy. There is no
communicator like you. Your neighbors might think you are
not so different, but you’re different enough to satisfy your
intentions, goals, dreams, and most of all, attain peace with
your new family.
The reason I totally support this type of technique is
because I’ve seen many parents do this and reap many bene-
fits, such as:
• One
They stay positive and have less fear of bad
things happening.
• Two
Parents can gain a conscious edge in expecting
only the best or the expectation of an advancing
future and start living and believing ahead of
the curve.
• Three
Positive and creativity builds relationships. Also,
friends will want to hear about more improve-
ments in your life instead of negative gossip, for
we know bad talking and negative conversations
can hurt the most confident and strong-minded
person. We all need positive thinking to lift us
up every day, especially when things do not go
our way.
• Four
The Baby Schedule Ruler will sculpt your little
one into expecting new abilities by first concen-
trating on what it will feel like or be like to
become just like you. They are listening to your
every conversation. As they grow to see and
focus on people and things, they will follow your
success. It works!
It is so fun to write this chapter because I saw an impor-

tant fact in the years of my experiences. A caregiver must know
when to allow the parents time with their baby—when to get
out of the picture. I thought, what would happen if I did every-
thing for the parent? What would the future be like without
me there? How depressing it would be for these parents to take
on a job they were not ready for. But they would be ready if
they can consistently use creative parental imagination.
Therefore, I always encourage all parents to be themselves
44 Dee Rule
and to spend the majority of their free time with their little
ones. Do not allow the caregiver to spend all the time with the
little one because when the caregiver departs, what are you
going to do? Now is the time to practice and know all you need
to know in order to accomplish a day totally alone with your
baby. Rest assured that you will be great. The greatest parent in the
world is you, not the caregiver.
Please know that I am not anti-caregiver, but a caregiver is a
bridge for parents to the other side. Caregivers are the support
beam, not the parent. We are the bridge frame, not the parent.
We are not there to take over but to give you proper care, and
then let go and move on. When should we let go and allow the
parent to go over that bridge and take total care of the baby?
I love the way Napoleon Hill (1883–1970) writes, and I can
relate to his saying, “Do not wait; the time will never be ’just
right.’ Start where you stand, and work with whatever tools you
may have at your command, and better tools may be found as
you go along.” Practice now, and you will be that much greater
than me.
“We are made wise not by the recollection of our past, but
by the responsibility for our future.”
–George Bernard Shaw
1856–1950
There are excellent leaders, which I define as people who

will sacrifice themselves for the joy of the masses. You are a
leader; remember this every time you see your baby! You are
the president of your newborn’s life, and as a leader, you
must incite possibilities by being that creative and imaginative
person who can make mistakes but later correct them and feel
positive about changes. Teaching these things to your child
will lift you far beyond your imagination.
To know where you want to go and keep on evolving into
perfection can’t be beat by any advisor. I hope you will let life
be lived with explorations of yourself. I personally feel so stuck
and let down if I am not thinking of a way to create a lot of joy
for myself and everyone else.
Learning how infants and children appreciate creativity
amazed me to the point of being in this profession day and
night. I am often asked how I did it for so long and how am I
still doing this line of work. One of my answers is that there is no
other love in life than to know and love your little one. To help
comfort that family whose lifestyle is far different from what it
was before is my motivation for being creative, and it kept me
feeling alive and peaceful. If I only could express to you the
super joy I have felt and the tears I have cried when leaving my
cases when my contract was up to move onto the next celebrity
client or successful business family. I can proudly say that the
tears I’ve shed were full of love, because all my clients saw a
way out of fears by having the right help, and most of all, the
person who brought out a lot of creativity and sound advice.
To help elevate the whole family and to lift up the hearts and
souls of every family member is my goal.
All of my families have been perfect. They have taught me
more about knowing not to be so fearful. Love must be devel-
oped and trusted. Love is far beyond and is well identified
through actions. By acting in a certain way, I saw the love my
families gave to their newborns, and this love is beyond inter-
pretation. When my parents mixed up the day with creativity,
life became so easy to live. Creativity is the recipe for living the
best life.
Life can be good if you develop something different and
entertaining. Let’s say creativity is almost as great as love. It is
a feeling that cannot be taken away—a unique entity. This is
life worth living; it’s just good and feels great. I thank all the
different people who have taken me for my word and lived this
good life.
46 Dee Rule
“Do something. If it works, do more of it. If it doesn’t, do

something else.”
—Franklin D. Roosevelt
(1882–1945)
Chapter 4
The Parental Persistence:

Feeding Times and
Schedule Formation
“Nothing in the world can take place of persistence. Talent

will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful
men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is
almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of
educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone
are omnipotent.”
—Calvin Coolidge
The thirteenth president of the United States
I
n this chapter, I’ve mapped out some schedules I’ve used
for many clients, and it helped put their days together in
a manner that was not too crazy. These schedules were
formed according to the baby’s personality and the needs of
the parents and according to the parental or family lifestyle.
These schedules produce a constructive day that will help
bring about a happy, peaceful, restful baby and family. It is one
of the most helpful pieces of advice I can put down on paper.
47
48 Dee Rule
“Consider the postage stamp, my son. It secures success

through its ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.”
—Josh Billings
The lifestyles of the parents matters. Having a baby should

not change your lifestyle until you are just miserable.
Misery is avoidable if you develop a plan that you can live
with and that will give you a happy ending. Knowing what your
day is going to be like is important. Also, knowing what you’re
going to accomplish by scheduling your baby as soon as possible
is worth as much as your inner peace. I am not saying that you
must do make a schedule, but if all has failed when trying to
have a sane day, you can try scheduling. In William Condon’s,
Study of Cultural Micro-rhythms, he looked over films of people
communicating, and he broke this communication down into
blocks of 1/45th of a second and analyzed all gestures, looks,
and speech and concluded that conversations had a rhythm—
a synchrony like a dance.
*****
I can hear the baby I’m taking care of. I’ll be back. She is
okay; I just gave here a burp. She was a little fussy, but now
I have her playing in her gym. Let’s continue!
*****
Perhaps scheduling a routine for children and newborns

can be seen as a dance of gestures or movements in the rhythm
of the day that produces positive results—results in commu-
nicating. It can be easy to understand for people who are
enjoying the dance (what is next or what can I have?). It can
also be frustrating but can be fixed with learning communica-
tion techniques to understand rhythms of life. It can be a gateway
that leads the mind to create and understand a natural sequence of
time. The baby will know what time is without knowing what a
clock is.
Many professionals have no idea how to make a routine
or schedule for babies and toddlers. A fixed schedule equals
a routine. What I provide is a routine, or schedule, that is
flexible according to the needs of the developing baby and
parental instincts of both the mom and the dad, because they
know best. From experience with some medical professionals,
in order for them to keep your business, they have put money
first and the truth last, or they just keep it quiet. Maybe they
don’t want to offend you in any way by giving you permission
to look for some other way. I love to give you the heads up on
all of this. Do what you like and what is good for your family!
If that means going to another doctor or medical practice, just
do it! Those parental instincts have kicked in and told you it is
the right thing to do.
“Not all of your decisions will be correct. None of us is

perfect. But if you get into the habit of making decisions,
experience will develop your judgment to a point where
more and more of your decisions will be right. After all, it
is better to be right 51 percent of the time and get some-
thing done because you fear to reach a decision.”
—H. W. Andrews
The one most powerful expression of the way we live is

time. Time is an arbitrary measurement that helps people
divide the years into months, the months into days, and the
days into hours, minutes, and seconds. Humans saw this need
and therefore developed this mechanism of order. Now let’s
divide up time for your baby in hours. We can show and teach
your baby about time, and time can produce actions. Time
is action and actions are divided in time. These actions in time
can be food, hugs, playtime, daily walk time, talking time, no
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talking time, music time, friends and family time, bath time,
bed time, afternoon nap time, and burp time.
“We must learn to view change as a natural phenom-

enon—to anticipate it and to plan for it. The future is
ours to channel in the direction we want to go … we must
continually ask ourselves, ’What will happen if … ?’ or
better still, ’How can we make it happen?’”
—Lisa Taylor
Order helps us see freely and sometimes hinders us from

some expressions. There is even a time where expressions
need to take a break. In other words, I have encouraged all my
families to have structure but retain some flexibility too.
It is so beautiful for me to see and find a way to help please
everyone. I had great joy when I left the family knowing they
did not always have to live in a box but could sometimes divert
from the routine one or two times a week to enjoy themselves
in various ways, like going to a restaurant with their baby or
having friends over for dinner, showing off the most precious
thing in their lives and socializing with their colleagues.
Having a baby leads us into a new dimension of time and life.
We’re reproducing another form of ourselves. As I’ve watched
these wonderful humans, I’ve witnessed that babies want to be
involved in their families’ lives and outings. They like to enjoy
life like us. They want to listen to sounds of chirping birds.
Think about if they might want to feel the summer breeze on
their faces or hear you laugh and converse on the phone or
just be social at a party. They want these things in modera-
tion just like adults. They want to be up and looking around
because they do not want to miss a thing. After they have seen
or loved that particular thing or gesture, they begin to fuss to
show us that they want to be put down to rest.
Let’s celebrate outside of sleep time. Go to the beach, to
the park, or shopping. But be inflexible sometimes and have

a solid schedule where feeding times are the same and bath
time, walk times, and playtimes are the same. If you live a life
of long days of working at the office or working from home,
you need to implement this structure every day. Having an
inflexible schedule doesn’t mean you have to be in an insti-
tutional environment. But you can reach your goals for your
baby faster by having a solid, persistent schedule. I know this
for a fact because it has helped many families I’ve worked with
to obtain peace and comfort.
For some babies, it will take a longer time to get used to
a schedule due to their personalities, but others will adapt to
the schedule much sooner. Because of gassiness and spit-ups,
the baby’s weight can be a factor as well. Severe changes in
the nursery room’s temperature can also be a big problem.
If the temperature fluctuates too much and if the newborn is
not monitored throughout the days and nights, it can cause
problems. You don’t want your little one to be hot or cold but
comfortable.
FEEDING TIMES AND

SCHEDULING FORMATIONS
When a baby comes home from the hospital, start feeding

him every three to three and a half hours and breastfeed for
half an hour if you can. You should only do this if the baby is at a
normal birth weight and the doctor okays the baby to go home.
You can give formula as a supplement, at least once or twice a
day in the beginning if needed until you have enough breast
milk. Remember that the baby needs to always be hydrated.
Therefore, your little one should look pink and day-by-day, his
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skin should appear fuller and meatier. Also, you should see
some form of spit-up, and the baby should void (urinate) clear,
not yellowish or gold-colored, urine. Contact your doctor if you see
any signs of sickness or dehydration. Always keep in contact with your
pediatrician because he or she is physically evaluating the progress of
your newborn or child.
Keeping the baby hydrated is very important and needs to

be highlighted in our minds. The next group of instruc-
tions will escalate your progress in achieving a long night’s
sleep for your baby. Please go over these instructions until
you’ve created a proper plan that works consistently.
Please be patient.
SPECIAL NOTE
Rulers A, B, and C can be adjusted according to your

answers in “The Lifestyle Clocking Day,” but keep true to the
intervals laid out in the schedules.
The Lifestyle Clocking Day

Place your answers to the following five questions
on the clock lines!
1. What time would you like your little one to go to

bed
at night and begin quite time?
2. What time would you like your little one to get up
in the morning?
3. What time would you like you little one to start
her midday nap?
4. What are the best times for your morning walks?
5. What time can you walk with your baby in the late
afternoon?
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Now we have an idea when we’re going to start quiet time. To

do this, turn on the sound machine, close the blinds, prepare a
bottles or breastfeed as usual, swaddle the baby, burp a couple
of times, and finally put the baby down to rest. The baby might
give a little fuss, but wait two minutes before comforting him
and see if he needs another burp or more food. Then put him
down to rest! -Tap out a rhythm if the baby begins to fuss again.
Turn your head away to exhale because babies associate your
rhythm with being awake and will want to be picked up. But if
you tap a new rhythm of beats, they will go down to sleep, drift
away, and rest. You’re the messenger!
I encourage top-offs. “Top-offs” are extra feedings given

to the baby between feeding times. It’s good to give your
little one a top-off at least once a day within the first three
months. Remember, your baby is still growing rapidly. She
is going to be hungry! For breastfeeding mothers, the
top-off should last ten to fifteen minutes. For bottle-fed
babies, two to three ounces of formula is good.
The Baby Schedule Ruler A (The Starter)

Ruler A is for babies who are between one and six weeks
old.
Feeding Times:
You should feed every three hours during the

day at 8 or 9AM(FOR FELXABILITY), 12:00
PM, 3:00 PM, 6:00 PM, 9:00 PM, and at four- to
five-hour intervals at night, but if the baby is
very hungry, you should feed the baby anytime
before the fourth or fifth hour, but not before
three hours. After the top-off feeding, go
another four to five hours before feeding again.
Try to feed your baby between eight and nine
o’clock in the morning if you can. Also, a good
opportunity for a top-off is the late morning.
But try to get back on schedule by giving the
12:00 PM feeding on time.
If you get off the routine, that’s okay. Just give

an early feeding or a later feeding to get back on
schedule for that day. Also, you can be a day off
schedule/routine but get back on your routine
as soon as possible for the next day.
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The Baby Schedule Ruler B

(The starter has advanced):
Ruler B is for babies between six to twelve weeks

of age.
Feeding Times:

You should feed the baby at 9:00 AM, 12:30 AM,
4:00 PM, 7:30 PM, and at five- to six-hour inter-
vals at night. Try to not give anything until at
least five hours after the last feeding. The last is
the “ghost feeding.” If your baby is not hungry
for six- to seven-hour stretches after the 8:00
PM or 8:30 PM feeding, you do not need to give
“ghost feedings.” Your baby can have a night
feeding, but put the baby down immediately
after burping—no talking or rocking. Also, try
to feed close to 9:00am in the morning, but if
you cannot, then start feeding at 8:00 AM if the
baby is very hungry. As the baby grows, you might
need to give him an early-morning feeding at
6:00 or 7:00 AM. But get back on schedule by
9:00 AM. Flexibility is also needed for a growing
baby.
Some babies who tend to be big spit-uppers

need to be held upright for a period of time
before you put them down to rest. Wait at least
fifteen minutes before you put them down to
rest. Their heads need to be supported at a
forty-five-degree angle in bed.
What Are Ghost Feedings?

I received a text message when I was in working in Los
Angeles, California, from a very sweet mother. I took care of
her first child, but I couldn’t help her out with the second
baby due to my commitment to my present client. She wanted
to know what she could do to help her son, Gary, to sleep
through the night just as well as her first child, Mark, who was
now three years old and had been sleeping through the night
since he was two and a half months.
She had hit a wall trying to make it happen and wanted
to know what the secret was to achieving the same results for
Gary, who was now three months old. I text messaged her back
and wrote, “Ghost feedings are the best way to accomplish
stretches of sleep.” I told her how to go about this, and she
called me back after two days and was elated by the results. She
told me, “Gary used to sleep for four hours at the most and
would have at least two feedings during the night. My ’ghost
feedings’ helped train him to sleep for six to eight hours.” She
always keeps in contact, and it’s been a pleasure helping her
out.
If you are not successful in having long stretches like five
or more hours at this time, I encourage you to start “ghost feed-
ings.” These are feedings that are done two hours to two and
a half hours after the bedtime feeding. You tiptoe into the
nursery armed with about three to four ounces of formula or
breast milk, and you say nothing. Begin to feed your baby in
dim light, burp him, and put him down to sleep again. Then
make your exit quietly. The sound machine should be on, and
you should have shades on the windows or dark curtains to
block out a lot of the morning sun.
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The Baby Schedule Ruler C

(The Advanced Baby)
Ruler C is for babies from twelve weeks of age until they are
sleeping through the night.
Feeding Times:
You should feed the baby at 8:00 AM or 9:00

AM, 11:30 AM or 12:30 PM, 4:00 PM, and 7:30
PM. Then the baby can sleep as long as ten or
eleven hours.
It is good to be in a very quiet place before putting your

baby down to sleep. Also, you the parent must decide the cut-off
point when you would like your baby to fall asleep, and this
time must be enforced nightly. Eight o’clock or eight thirty are
excellent goodnight times, but you must keep to the schedule
as strictly as you would like the baby to observe it.
The baby gets a bottle as soon as she wakes up after ten

or more hours counting from the time she goes down
to sleep at night until the morning. Always give the baby
some time before you enter her room to comfort her with
pity-pats or turning her on the right or left side. Try not
to breathe on her or talk because this will only rouse her
more. Then the baby gets her morning feeding.
As time goes by, the 9:00 AM feeding will be the breakfast

feeding with solids, but you can give your baby a bottle
if she is fussy after 6:00 AM—then give her that 9:00 AM
breakfast feeding.
Do not be afraid of fussiness or crying; they are two different

things and can be interpreted wrongly by us. Fussiness is done
in a rhythmic manner like talking and crying is expressed in an
all-out bawl, it is much louder and arrhythmic. Letting a baby
fuss a little is fine. It clears the lungs and gets rid of unwanted
gas. It forces out all stress. But do not let your baby cry for a
long period of time without some comfort. Your baby might be
telling you something is wrong. Always check your little one’s
temperature if you see a difference in facial color. Knowing
what your baby looks like normally is an advantage in accom-
plishing early awareness of any problems, and you must contact
your doctor immediately if you suspect a problem.
As your little one gets to the age of six months and older,
parents can decide how long to allow their babies to fuss or cry
for periods of time before giving some comfort, but I would
advise parents to never allow any fussiness beyond ten to fifteen
minutes at a time. The baby will eventually give up and fall
asleep. But use this only at bedtime—bedtime is the strictest
time of the day. Night is for rest, and so are your baby’s daily
naptimes. Rest time is the number one time for your baby to
sleep and refuel and for you, its parents, to have time together,
socialize, make phone calls, have lunch or dinner, throw your-
selves on your bed and make more babies, or just rest your
souls.
Can you imagine driving a car with no fuel? This is the way
you will feel if you continue without sound rest. Implement
this program and abide by it daily. If you do, you’ll have a great
sense of fulfillment that you are doing the right thing for your
baby and your family. Do not overwhelm yourself with count-
less or unmindful things that will throw the success you are
reaching for off track, but remember what it will mean for you
to have a productive day with restful sleep. Pace yourself!
People will want to know the formula for your success and
will need every detail from you. Just tell them about it. Be open
60 Dee Rule
to the great thing you have come across and feel free and giddy
again like a teenager. Be free to express your joy at every great
thing in your life.
Chapter 5
Ways to Calm Down

a Fussy Baby
B
abies can mix the sweet formula for persuasion with
their facial expressions, cries, and the innocent, small
shape of their unique human bodies. This lure is infec-
tious and cunning to our emotions. Politicians use persuasion
to win votes and finance elections. They achieve this with the
placement of TV advertisements and hot forum debates host-
ed by a mediator (a known personality who will provide them
the questions of the day on social, economical, ethnical, and
international topics). When babies use persuasion to be loved
by us and to have their needs satisfied—it works! They’re our
“baby candidates”!
Those facial expressions melt the soul. They can convince
us to act more quickly than we would without them. It’s great
to see the body language of presidential candidates and their
plan to get our votes. It can make one agree or disagree on
the subjects they are debating. Children posses this power of
persuasion and grow up mastering it through practicing on
their parents and friends and in their professional adult lives.
It is vital that infants feel the importance of their persua-
sion. It allows them to feel they have dominion over us. Give
as much attention as possible to these little ones; this attention
61
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will enforce the idea of their important position in the hier-

archy of your family.
Here are some keys to the puzzle of newborn crying.
Soothing the newborn is not an easy task. When I started my
nursing career, I thought, This is an impossible task! I wanted
to quit; where was the door? My lord, I thought, because of the
amount of work I have in front of me, I cannot do this for life! I
better start looking for that new job—anything that doesn’t include
the sound of crying. Soothing the newborn child, twins, and trip-
lets was an out-of-body experience and a challenge. To read all
the signals a child gives when it is fussing, crying, miserable,
and in need of something like sleep—it’s an enormous task
because every human being is different. I’ve never seen two
sets of twins, whether identical or fraternal, alike in personality
and crying style.
“The scream, the whimper, the laugh, the roar, the moan,
and the rhythmic crying convey the same messages to
everyone everywhere. Like the sounds of other animals,
they relate to basic emotional moods and give us an
immediate impression of the motivational state of the
vocalizer.”
“Crying is not only the earliest mood-signal we give, it is

also the most basic. Smiling and laughing are unique and
rather specialized signals, but crying we share with thou-
sands of other species.”
The Naked Ape
by Desmond Morris
A fussy baby’s crying can be softened by positioning your

little one in the way he wants to be soothed. Soothe him in
that position where he will forget all the gassiness, hiccups,
and spit-ups. Yes, your baby has a comfort zone. This comfort
zone can be found by trial and error. I can tell you this because
I’ve seen mothers and fathers find ways to soothe their babies,
which results in peace for the whole family.
These parents are indeed creative. They will try to figure
out how to soothe their babies on their own, positioning
their little ones in different spots. Imagining the possibilities
of coping with the newborn can help these parents become
better people in general.
Intuition is the subconscious analysis that will bring about
the remedy to the child’s fussiness. What parents feel is usually
right. If you question yourself often enough and use your
answers, presto, you will solve the problem. Great solutions are
gathered in silence and translated in talk. It’s so nice to have
a parent solve the problem like solving a crossword puzzle,
lining everything up and seeing the results. Creative problem
solving results in beautiful communication. It’s an adventure
for the growing adult. But watch out for the growing baby! He
or she knows you almost better than you know yourself. Your
baby spends all day being close to you and listening to your
conversations and the rise and fall of your voice, and she sees
you turning your attention back to her every need. What can
I do to become a baby again? Scientists need to work harder
on this!
I begin to try to ease the newborn by first understanding
the personality of the baby and, most important, the lifestyle
and personalities of the parents. Let’s have more winners than
losers. The Baby Schedule Ruler begins with these techniques
and the positive effect you can have on your baby. Always ask
yourself what positive feeling the newborn is searching for.
Maybe something in his environment, such as an odor, is
disturbing; it might be that the room is too hot or too cold.
We’re going to search together by trying these techniques.
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Try This And That, But It Will Take

Parental Imagination And Creativity To
Make Our Days Better
“Learn how to be optimistic even in the face of large and
intimidating challenges and it will revolutionize your
life.”
—Donald Trump
One:
• Fully swaddle your little one if he is under four
weeks old, and swaddle the newborn halfway if
he is four to twelve weeks old.
• Hold the baby upright and facing outward,

placing your arms across the tummy. Hold the
baby comfortably as you give her a tour of her
new home.
• Let your baby see himself in the mirror. Talk to

your baby or sing a favorite lullaby. Return to
this position as needed. It helps to release a lot
of gas.
Two
• Swaddle your baby halfway and place her across
your lap on their side. Pat your little one’s back
as if you’re burping her. You can sway a little so
your baby can enjoy the movement.
Three
• Holding the baby over your shoulder, pat his
back gently until a big burp comes out.
Four
• Sing your favorite song to your newborn or
play your favorite song while bouncing your
newborn.
Five
• Use a rattle to distract the baby from crying.
Six
• Use a baby play mirror to distract her from
crying.
Seven
• Fully swaddle your newborn and hold him.
Eight
• Put your baby in a Baby Bjorn and walk around
with her in the home or outside.
Nine
• Dance with your newborn when he is fully
wrapped or half swaddled. This often works, but
do not dance too much after a feeding because
the baby might spit up.
Ten
• Rocking in a rocking chair is okay, but do not
rock too often or too vigorously. You should
always take note of whether you are establishing
good habits or bad habits for your baby. I will
talk more about good and bad habits for your
newborn later. The main question I am trying
to ask is can you live with any habit your baby
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develops? You must be able to live with the

baby’s habits comfortably. If a habit bothers you,
you will have to change that habit. If it is harm-
less, the baby might just grow out of it. It might
take some time.
Parenting requires all of our patience and none of our

experience.
“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only

through experience of trial and suffering can the soul
be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and
success achieved.”
—Helen Keller
Eleven
• If the baby is overtired and has been uncomfort-
able for a long time, and you have reached your
limit of trying, then the solution is to give your
baby a two-minute cry.
• Fully swaddle the baby if she is under two

months old or half swaddle the baby if she is
older. Never full swaddle longer than four
months for a preemie.
Special Note:
Some babies like to be fully swaddle

longer than four weeks, it’s just
there personality and preference.
It’s ok with me if it’s ok with you.
• Put the baby down in the crib or bassinet.
• Turn off the lights and turn on a sound machine

that has many selections if sounds. I always
recommend the white noise selection or the
waterfall.
• Return to the room after two minutes to pat the

baby if he is not calming down or falling asleep.
Repeat the two-minute cry for one more time
cycle. If the little one is still going on, give him
a top-off. A top-off is a little extra breast milk or
formula given outside of feeding time to help
satisfy your baby’s hunger.
• Give the baby two to four ounces of formula

if the she is between five and eight pounds, or
breastfeed up to fifteen minutes if you have a
good flow, but add an additional five minutes if
the flow of milk is a little low. Do not be afraid to
try bottle of milk every now and then because it
takes longer for the body to digest formula, and
formula might give your baby a fuller feeling
over a longer period of time if used only one
time for the day.
• Everybody’s breast milk has different amounts

of nutrients. The morning flow of milk is higher
in nutrients than at any other time of the day.
Twelve
• If it’s very nice outside, take your little one
out for a walk. I believe walking your little one
twice a day is wonderful for the baby and for
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the parent. The sun and wind wear babies out;

it exhausts all their energy and relaxes them.
Make it a ritual to go out on frequent walks. If
you can do this once a day for one to two hours,
you have done a lot for your newborn’s aware-
ness of the world.
• Yes, get involved with other parents who can give

you positive feedback, not negative comments.
We do not need opposition at this time.
• Many times you will find yourself hearing a lot

of bad things from other parents; please do not
be upset for too long. There is a better way out if
things are not so great. Let’s avoid stress. Other
people’s comments can be very hurtful, but your
job is to disregard the negative comments and
engage yourself in peace and happiness with
your baby every day.

Speaking about this is very important to me and
all the families I’ve spoken with. If someone out
there—on the phone, in the park, at the grocery
store—is giving you an upset stomach, get out of
there sooner rather than later, especially if that
person is rambling on saying stressful and bad
things you do not agree with.
• Feel confident in your decisions if you and your

loved one agree to change any way that you take
care of your baby. That’s your business. Do not
make a walk with your baby a stressful time.
• Babies love the bumpiness of the pavement and

the beat of being outside, but sometimes a walk
will not work to calm the baby down. Just sway
a little or take your baby out in the stroller for
a burp or two. Babies love to see everyone out
there, as well as trees, neighborhood dogs, chil-
dren, squirrels, cats, cars, flower beds, gates, and
you.
Thirteen
• Play a lot of music! And please do not listen
only to one particular kind of music. There is
a whole world of very entertaining selections
from every country in the world. Let your heart
and your baby’s soul be entertained with the gift
of music.
Some programs advocate only one type of music,

but your child will love any music you love.
Babies love to listen to rhythms and bass beats.
This is what they were exposed to in the womb.
Why take it away from them now that they’re
outside the womb? It’s best to let them feel as
if things have not changed very much and to
revisit the good things they did when they were
carried by Mommy.
When all is said and done, soothing your baby comes down
to finding your own niche with your newborn—whatever
you discover while being active during the day. If this unique
discovery soothes the baby in a pleasing way, then you have
discovered something new to be used over again, that is the
niche of soothing you’ve achieved with your little one
Keep on going and feel comfortable enjoying this
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experience. Growing into parenthood is the greatest expe-

rience you will ever feel. You’re being productive while
understanding your baby’s reasons for crying. I know I sound
like I’m encouraging you to become a marketing executive,
but we as parents in a very unique way must sell ourselves to the
newborn’s mind. They in turn seek understanding just like us.
They’re thinking, “What can you do for me? Why am I naked?
Who the hell are you? What’s that?" or, “How can I be you?”
Sometimes a baby is bored and just does not know what
he wants from you. We can give suggestions: toys, funny facial
expressions to get them involved, and so on. The change of
environment will produce a new understanding in the baby’s
mind, enabling him to pay more attention to it the next time
you use the same routine. The baby’s boredom will be shorter
and shorter as he develops patience. He will not complain too
much. His weariness will go away when he accepts suggested
play, naps, and enjoyment of your company. Parents are parents
because they can find the right solutions for their babies.
Let me tell you how a particular family found its niche with
their newborn. They discovered that their newborn loved to
be in his snowsuit and taken around the city in wintertime, all
cuddled and warm, for short walks. It was the only thing guar-
anteed to calm him down every time. Of course, he grew out
of his snowsuit and is now a very beautiful and bright boy. He
just loved the feel of the material or the smell; whatever the
reason, he just loved it so much. If he could have spoken at the
time, then he would have told us what was so special about the
snow suit. But we understood his love for it.
I’ll tell you one more niche I’ve found. This is very funny,
but it worked for this particular family. The daddy is a well-
rounded actor who loved to rap songs very playfully. His little
one at six weeks was fussy, and then all of a sudden his daddy
began imitating the sounds of drum beats in his songs. To all of
our amazement, his little one calmed down and peacefully fell
asleep. This worked all the time for him, and the more I saw
it working, the more I learned that those special songs, move-
ments, words, and other techniques that fit your baby are as
diverse as the world. As the weeks progressed, the baby’s father
began to come up with other ways to keep playful. He took
the baby around the house in an airplane position. The baby
was faced outward and gently flying around, being supported
continually in his dads arms. We call it “The Airplane.” Their
baby understood the adventure and wanted more entertain-
ment. His parents were Erinn (actress and model) and Oliver
Hudson (star of Rules Of Engagement), great people indeed.
“What a good mother and father instinctively feel like

doing for their babies is usually best after all.”
—Benjamin Spock
We all have the ability to make a difference when our

newborn is fussy. Just keep on trying to make things better by
practicing these techniques and doing the things you love.
Search for that solution, and you will find what works, as long
as it is safe. If you use creative parental imagination, you will
find success and create deeper bonding with your baby at fussy
times.
I knew a nanny or caregiver who didn’t give the parents
she worked for opportunities to be the parents. By this I mean
she made all the decisions and didn’t allow the parents to use
their parental creativity to figure things out for themselves. On
top of her selfish outlook on life, she made her employers feel
nobody could do things better than she could. She wanted to
be seen in everyone’s eyes as a top nanny. But the truth was
far from that. I knew she was fired because she became too
competitive with her boss and anybody they hired to help out.
She even tried to take advantage of her employers’ kindness. I
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so dislike when somebody takes advantage of people who trust

them.
To all caregivers, it’s not about you; it’s about the well-
being of the client. This person never helped the family obtain
a good resting schedule or nightly routine because she didn’t
want to be sent away or be let go. She knew the baby would
sleep through the night if she helped them. And on top of
that, she didn’t allow the parents to be creative with their baby,
letting the family down.
To all parents, do your thing with your baby. I mean that
you should map out all the things you want to accomplish and
be persistent in accomplishing them, unless you see a need for
change, like hiring a good caregiver.
To all the great caregivers out there who are not in the
headlines and who have done an exceptional job allowing the
families they are taking care of to love and bond with their
children—may God bless you forever. Allowing parents to
discover their own way of settling their baby down and putting
their baby to sleep or just having good times is worth more to
the benefit for all in the house. That’s love! And love is not
selfish.
Put your imagination into gear. It is not only for

preschoolers, but also for all parents to believe by seeing
all possibilities.
—Dee Rule
Chapter 6
Proper Swaddling and

Putting Baby Down
to Sleep Rule
F
or nine months, a baby has developed and grown in
the mother’s womb. It’s a tight, compact space and is a
warm and very satisfying environment to grow in. When
it’s time to be delivered, a baby might say, “Hey, what hap-
pened? There’s too much room for me now. How am I going
to learn how to adapt to a huge amount of space? I want to feel
small, warm, and cuddly again.” The only way to simulate be-
ing back in the womb for these babies is by swaddling. Learn
this technique well and be consistent at using it. It will give you
a lot of sleep and make you and baby happy indeed.
There is not much peace you will achieve without proper
swaddling. There’s not a way out of this rule because it is one
of the most important rules in The Baby Schedule Ruler. To
not swaddle your baby in some way or shape might lead to
a very colicky baby—one who cries or is fussy excessively—or
depressed parents. But this stress can be avoided. We can try
to prevent this from happening by learning the right thing to
do, and that is swaddling. This chapter goes into this matter
deeply. Let’s gain peace of mind!
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Full Swaddling
This is like ice cream on a cake for a newborn. We need ice
cream! You can accomplish much sleep by having your baby
fully wrapped. I recommend the baby to be fully wrapped from
birth to three months, or until the baby weighs twelve pounds.
Full swaddling provides babies with resistance, which helps to
build muscles and gain motor skills in their arms and legs. It
helps them to be warm and packed in one single spot. It doesn’t
confuse the baby like some parents might think. Babies are not
uncomfortable when they are swaddled; it is used to comfort
them into relaxing their movements.
These movements do not allow them to sleep very soundly.
They keep the babies’ tummies, arms, lower bodies, and faces
hyperactive. Sometimes they will do smile, but they are not
smiling at you if they are between one and two months. It’s
nice for your little one to show you the muscle movements
they have for a smile in response to something, but responding
by smiling usually cannot be done until the little one is two
months or older.
Make sure you wash the wrap clothes in simple baby deter-
gent without fabric softeners, because they can dry out a baby’s
skin.
The right results will be obtained with The Baby Schedule
Ruler’s A, B, and C timelines. These schedules structure a
newborn’s life so that you can adjust the feeding times to your
lifestyle. On top of this flexibility, I’ll show you how to deal
with your baby’s growing hunger. Stop and study the feeding
schedules I’ll help you create. They set limits but also allow for
top-offs throughout the day that will help satisfy your baby’s
growing needs. This also helps the parent feel comfortable
by satisfying that fear that the baby has not had enough or is
hungry for more.
The closeness of the swaddling changes as the baby grows.

Between two months and three months, you must allow the
baby to kick freely or stretch its legs out while keeping the
arms snuggled, but if the baby’s arms get out, it’s fine. Just
make sure your little one’s nails are properly clipped or filed
to prevent any scratching accidents.
NOTE
Use no softeners on the baby’s clothes. They may dry out

your little one’s skin and irritate any rashes that would
heal faster if you weren’t using softeners.
Always keep the baby on its sides or back while sleeping.

This position keeps him or her from choking on his or
her spit-up because it allows the majority of the spit-up to
roll out of the mouth. As I’ve experienced by taking note
of the babies in my care all day long, I’ve concluded that
the best position for a child is on its side or back until it
can do a full, 360-degree turn or lift up its head fully while
on the stomach for at least ten seconds.
Half Swaddling
Half swaddling is just as beneficial as full swaddling. It gives
the baby warmth and comfort. Half swaddling is more appro-
priate when the baby is two months and older. Allowing free
rotation of the arms relieves the parents who do not like full
swaddling because they think the baby is in a strait jacket. I will
not force parents to fully swaddle their babies if they are not
comfortable with it. Babies will not do well if they don’t get
enough sleep. Sleep provides a foundation for success. If you
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need your rest, please consider these options for daily sleep.
They work very well.
For some babies, it is best to swaddle halfway during the
day and fully at night. Also, the family can fully swaddle the
baby for up to three hours during the day and begin to estab-
lish a daily naptime with the full-swaddle technique, then work
their way into half swaddling for the daily naps. The first four
months are vital in establishing this.
Infants can get into a bad habit of not wanting to be put
down for a nap or for their nighttime sleep. I have worked with
parents who gave up on trying to get their babies to sleep on
their own and, out of desperation, took the baby to Mommy
and Dad’s bedroom, not knowing that this decision could hurt
their families. When you allow your baby into your bed one
time, you’ll end up doing it again and again. There are some
parents who do not want to be far away from their children,
and they just can’t allow their little ones to be fussy or to cry a
little. Training a child to develop some independence is hard
for some parents because they would like their little ones to
stay small and be babies for life.
I do not blame them for thinking this way because growing
up comes with a lot of responsibilities, choices, and social
arrangements. Why would we want our little ones to advance
so rapidly? The truth of the first year of children’s lives is hard
to digest. This is the year they learn to eat, can start learning to
go to the bathroom, turn on their sides, hold up their heads,
sit up, and handle spit-ups. They learn to crawl and smile. What
joy it gives us when they can recognize us with a huge laugh or
giggle. They start to develop a whole lot of discretion; they can
like a new face or dislike an old one. They develop into some-
thing very compelling that evolves by the day. As parents, we
cannot stop this process of rapid development. We remember
them coming home from the hospital, how little they were,
and think, can they just slow down a little? But all they want is
to eat until their next diaper change.
It’s 4:00 AM and the baby is waking up after sleeping

about five hours. She is being breastfed, and Mommy has
so much milk for her that Mommy had to pump out extra
milk in the some of six-ounce bottles at the last feeding.
The baby is two weeks old and is gaining weight as she
should be, according to her last doctor’s visit. She has
gained almost eight ounces. I have to wake the mom to
come and feed this very hungry baby. We will continue.
I totally understand those parents who just do not want

to let go and give their children some type of independence.
But having their little ones sleep in Mom and Dad’s bed can
lead to a division in the family. The social life and romance life
between you and your partner can dramatically change for the
worse. When you allow this behavior to continue, the baby will
almost always expect to be in Mommy and Daddy’s bedroom
for naps and nighttime sleep. It’s the “experience factor”; they
remember sleeping in your bed but not the being in their cribs
in their own rooms, lying on their sheets experiencing the
smell, look, and feel of their cribs. Please do not let the baby’s
room go to waste.
In the first seven to eight weeks, babies cannot see you
clearly. They are guided by smells and intuition. Let’s not
forget to include that they’re also guided by their parents.
Another benefit of swaddling is that these babies will be
wrapped in their own fabrics and will get to know the signal
you are giving to them by the very act of swaddling—that it’s
time to sleep.
It is great to bring your baby to your room to play or hang
out, but what’s not beneficial is for your child to believe it’s his
place for a good night’s sleep. Bringing your newborn to bed
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sets a trend that you will pass on to all your future children
and sadly cause a rift in the very foundation of your family,
marriage, and relationships.
Establishing good habits and feeling positive about what
you have mapped out is satisfying for your family. These little
ones will always follow your lead. Being a good parent means
making mistakes along the way. Yes, you will cry about those
mistakes, but you should expect failure and don’t see it as a
defeat. That will be like defeating yourself and not allowing
yourself to review the problems or bad habits. Pick yourself up,
and you’re a winner. Your best parenting will happen when you
have failed and tried to not fail again. You’ll then win without
trying.
Embrace the bad stuff in hopes of change. Laugh off a
failure and try again to make things better. It takes practice to
master parenting, and it takes patience to see victory. Envision
your life with lots of love. Every day there will be some sour
notes and some odd happenings. Believe in your instincts
because they are always right. The truth is that the first thought
is the kicker. Your instincts are the proper guide and answer to
a world of problems. We like to disregard them most times and
take a shortcut we somehow devised to prove them wrong.
Just like children, we adults have to fall before we can walk
confidently. Thank goodness for problems. They’re the only
way most people grow up. They allow us to use our imagina-
tions to create sane solutions. This usually happens within two
seconds of thought. Somehow we put together the solutions
and remove ourselves from catastrophes.
Here we’re dealing with sleep and the power of having good
habits. Keep these things in your arsenal and refer to them like
you would a dictionary. Try to get things done in a better way.
Sometimes we just run out of solutions. We need a reference!
Hold on to those who have come across similar circumstances
and let them help you form your own conclusions.
Not every child will become attached to sleeping in your

bed or on top of your chest, but why risk the fall of your founda-
tion (your sanity)? Not giving the child the permission to sleep
with you by putting them down in her own crib or bassinet will
prevent her from having the experience of sleeping in your
bedroom. We love the taste of refined sugar like candy bars,
fries, maple syrup, and sodas; what if we had never had an expe-
rience with the taste of sugar? We would never experience the
desire for the sugar’s physical results, like the excessive weight
gain it brings.
Let’s say you began to put your baby down to sleep in its
bed at night or for daily naps and you gave up on that way of
training your little one because he just didn’t want to sleep in
his room anymore; he enjoyed the warmth and satisfaction of
sleeping on your warm chest and the emotional experience
of always having your permission to be there. Then we stand
at a crossroads and cannot sleep or live like this anymore.
Retraining your baby to sleep in his crib is going to require a
whole lot of withdrawal cries and emotional changes and reor-
ganization of the patterns your baby has put together in his
mind. Edward de Bono came to a great conclusion in Lateral
Thinking that the brain is “a special environment which allows
information to organize itself into patterns.” The real mind
is organized naturally. It looks for patterns to store and goes
back to these information patterns for various uses. Lateral
thinking restructures our patterns to help form more creative
uses for all the information gathered as sequence. Let’s get
busy as parents and help form good lateral thinking from the
start for the benefit of our children’s memory.
Can we prevent the newborn or toddler from developing
bad habits? Let’s not rest any insecurities we have on our chil-
dren. It’s up to the parents to also parent themselves. Be very
aware of your habits, and develop the pattern of good habits
to give you a better response for your actions. Responsibility is
80 Dee Rule
a great word and nobody defines it more clearly than Stephen

R. Corvey in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
We have the power to control our responses from indi-
viduals we know and meet with our moment-by-moment
emotional state and thoughts. Do we want to feel good today
and feel bad tomorrow? Can we handle our response? What
can we do today that will create the right feelings we’re looking
to achieve? It is up to all humans to decide to start the process
of responsibility with good habits.
“Our greatest happiness does not depend on the condi-

tion of life in which chance has placed us, but is always the
result of a good conscience, good health, occupation and
freedom in all just pursuits.”
—Thomas Jefferson
Stop blaming the world for problems you have created;

start making or creating good emotional outcomes. If we want
a successful family, we have to work our asses off for our fami-
lies to work and work well! But standing on love is not the only
solution. The most valuable change we can make to reverse
our discomfort is to perform some kind of action. Plan, read,
and research like I’ve done to write and complete this book.
Move and pray with faith. With that said, blame no one for
your setbacks. Take a responsible action to move toward that
faithful ending. You will be able to sleep well at night. Your
days and weekends will be great if you use your time wisely.
Involvement, patience, and responsibility will get you
where you’d like to end up with your family. But if you sit and
do nothing, you’ll end up in spring without tulips and dead
daisies in rainy weather.
“If this world affords true happiness, it is to be found in a

home where love and confidence increase with the years,
where the necessities of life come without severe strain,
where luxuries enter only after their cost has been care-
fully considered.”
—A. Edward Newton
Chapter 7
Baby Bath Ruler and

Daily Activities
T
here’s nothing better than soaking in the tub. It’s a
great feeling to be immersed in the bath, naked. It re-
laxes the mind and helps us woooooooo. To witness ba-
bies cooing and wooooing in their tubs is most delightful. Most
babies dread their baths in the beginning. It will take about six
weeks or longer until they can really enjoy bath time. As their
sight improves, they will be able to interact with you more.
For first-time parents, I strongly recommend that you read
this chapter a day before you attempt to give your baby a bath
and the day of the bath. It’s good to prepare your little one’s
bath items a day in advance. This will give you a large amount
of time to look over what you need to have in place for the
bath and to go and get the things you do not have. Laying out
everything I’ve outlined a day before is a very good habit to
have, and as you get comfortable with all the things that are
needed, you can wait to prepare until a few hours ahead of the
bath.
First, babies should bathe twice a week from the time when
the umbilical cord falls off until the baby is three months old.
This is to prevent overdrying the skin, especially the face. Start
with an infant tub that has supportive netting. I find these
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84 Dee Rule
are the best because they allow the baby to be submerged in

the warm water. Also, the water temperature should be above
the room temperature that is pleasing to the parent. Test the
temperature with your hand by moving it back and forth in the
water. Do some circular motions because this helps regulate
the water temperature, preventing hotter and colder spots. It’s
good to get into the habit of checking the water temperature
constantly for comfort.
Always set up all the things you are going to need for the
bath before putting the baby into the tub.
These Are the Things You Need

1. Infant bathtub with support netting
2. Two bath towels
3. Baby body wash that is unscented. Later on you

can try out the scented brands and change them
at each bath.
4. Baby shampoo. The same rules apply for

shampoo as with baby body wash.
5. A change of clothes
6. Diapers
7. Ointments (A and D ointment or Aquaphor

ointment for the daytime and Balmex for the
nighttime. Always change the ointment you use
because your baby’s skin can get used to one
particular ointment, therefore causing severe

and often painful diaper rashes.)
8. Three washcloths
9. Large plastic cup full of warm water
10. Lotions that are unscented or that have a mild

odor
11. Baby hair brush and comb
When putting the baby into the bathwater, please splash

the support netting with some of the warm water, because
these tub nettings can become cool very fast. It is good to do
the bath with two people. One person can hold the baby and
the other person can splash the support netting with the bath-
water as you slowly place the baby into the water. Give about
four to five splashes.
Now that the baby is in the water, just dip one of the wash
cloths into the water and spread this wash cloth out on top of
the baby’s abdomen and chest. This should give him a very
warm feeling, minimizing chills. Take the second wash cloth
and soak it into the water and start wiping the baby’s face with
clear water—no bath wash. Shampoo the head and rinse after
you finish lathering the body. Apply some baby wash to the
wash cloth and wash the neck, arms, chest, abdomen, and legs.
For the private areas, just wipe in a square pattern, getting
between the creases. Then, turn the baby to the side and rub
the back, butt, and legs with long strokes of the wash cloth.
Rinse the baby off with the clear water, starting from the
head and working your way down the front of the body. Then
turn the baby to the side and rinse the back, butt, and legs.
Grab the baby towel and gently lift the baby out of the
86 Dee Rule
water and place him onto the towel. Dry and lotion your baby.
Always rub the lotion in your hands before applying it on the
skin. This also decreases chills. Diaper and dress the baby. Also,
don’t forget to give a lot of kisses.
Try to gently massage the baby with the lotion. Sometimes
your baby will hate coming out of the water to be dressed
and patted down. If your little one is crying a lot when he is
taken out of the bath, go straight to patting off excess water
between his body folds, then lotion him down and dress him.
Why prolong the wait for breastfeeding or bottle feeding? Do
not feel stressed out if the baby is hysterical; it’s because your
little one enjoyed the bath so much. It makes him feel as if he
is back in the womb. Feel free to entertain him by shaking a
rattle or singing a song.
I need to take the baby out for the morning walk. I can
hear him getting fussy to get outside. This will give me enough
time to use the bathroom before we head on outside. I will
return after our walk!
The baby will feel great, just like you do after you go to the
gym sauna. I had never stepped into a gym hot tub before, but
after working out, I was looking to try something new, hoping
to mix up my exercise routine. Upon entering the bubbly hot
tub, I felt so soft. The warm water gave me a refreshing feeling.
Wow! I imagined how babies feel the first time they experience
a bath. How relaxing it is to experience a feeling similar to
being back in the womb where it’s heavenly.
Daily Activities Ruler

Creativity is a central source of meaning in our lives …
most of the things that are interesting, important, and
human are the results of creativity … [and] when we are
involved in it, we feel that we are living more fully than

during the rest of life.
—Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
Professor of Psychology
There are countless activities you can do with your baby,

and I highly advise you to start off stimulating your little one
with a lot of conversations and hugs. It will be great to act like
a baby again.
Here are great activities that can be done

with a newborn or a toddler
A. Go on long walks every day. If you have time, twice a day
is good, in the morning and evening. Put your baby in
the stroller or a sling holder or just simply hold him and
get out of the house for a walk. She needs to embrace
sunlight, wind, other people’s voices, cars driving and
blowing horns, the chirping birds, and other sights and
sounds.
B. Invest in a play gym, baby swing, and bouncing chair.

The better ones have objects arranged around where
the baby sits for interaction.
C. Always read a book a day from the fist day your baby gets
home from the hospital. Please don’t delay the joy of
going through the sounds and pictures of a children’s
book. Also, as soon as your baby reaches three months,
add two more books to read per day. It’s imperative to
allow him to get interested in and see written words as
you read. The pictures are colorful and the impressions
of different circumstances and stories will develop his
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imagination. The baby will begin to correlate the sounds

you’re making with the stories. Most of all, he will slowly
learn patience and pacing. This has to do with evolving
a natural rhythm that he will imitate from you and
translate into language and personality. Incorporate a
reading scenery that is fun for you and baby. You have
to love the children books you’re reading to your little
one. Let’s start there. If you love a book, then your baby
will likely enjoy it too.
D. Show your baby a lot of facial expressions that are funny

and warm. Allow her to touch your face as you make
these expressions. You must also touch her face, arms,
legs, and body. It will stir her curiosity and make her
think about how to communicate back to you. Always
try to look her in the eye and direct her focus at your
eyes because a lot of babies can be distracted by all of
the eye-catching things around. Get that eye contact!
E. Get a childproof play mirror or just simply hold your

baby in front of your mirror. He will love who he is
looking at. Babies do not entirely recognize the image
of themselves. In the beginning, he will look seriously
into the mirror, but he will warm up to his expressions
and yours. Your little one will laugh eventually. His eyes
will light up every time he sees himself, and he will want
to investigate more. He will wonder, what’s a mirror?
Who is in the mirror?
F. Have your little one turn over when lying down, and
more important, give your baby some tummy time
throughout the day. Yes, put him on his tummy! Babies
need to do some push-ups to strengthen their necks
and shoulders, but watch them and don’t walk away.
It’s important to have your baby on the floor for the

majority of daily activities beginning at three months.
This is vital to your baby’s developing strength in his
arms and legs. It will also encourage him to go after
objects and reach at different lengths. His movements
and balance will advance. Please remember to get him
on the floor and play. Adapting to his great ongoing
weight gain is important. It is very helpful for babies to
experience their weight daily by pushing up their heads
to feel the difference in the heaviness of their heads. Get
busy!
G. Practice sitting up with your baby beginning around

three. This will help your baby to develop the muscles
she needs to sit and play.
H. It’s great if your toddler interacts with other children

five months and older. Older babies will give your little
one a boost of determination. He’ll want to do the same
things his peers are doing. They will plant ideas in his
mind or communicate to him to act. We were all born
with set abilities, but through drills and practice mixed
with faith, we can advance our potential.
An innocent look, smile, comment, or question will set

into motion long play times. Having play dates is a must
starting at six months. Get serious in allowing your baby
to mingle in society with other little ones! It’s good to go
out and meet parents, but do not stick around someone
who is hard on you or who might want to compete with
you over your baby’s skills. All children advance at their
own pace. That’s real! If you are worried about any
problems of development, talk it out with your doctor.
90 Dee Rule
Questioning yourself and your child’s development is

healthy and must be done consistently! Be alert, and
you’ll be just fine.
The Don’t Factors
• No walkers because they can delay your child’s

natural walking time.
• No being in the bouncers for longer than ten

minutes a day because the baby will learn to
like bouncing more than trying to walk. Also,
the baby may walk on his toes more until about
three years old
Special Family Events

Having a baby changes the way you view in-laws. I love it
when they come to visit now. They can hold the baby and
I can go out.
—Mathew Broderick
Never ever put aside special events or occasions because

you feel you are going to mess up the baby’s schedule. I
strongly advise going out once or twice a week and getting off
your baby’s schedule so that your baby can adapt to different
patterns and still have an afternoon nap and sleep through the
night. As your little one grows, you can come off the routine
a little more, depending on how well the baby is sleeping
through the night. Therefore, in a seven-day week, mix it up
a little. You can try to do it once a week, but remember to get
back on schedule as soon as you get back home. A short time
off schedule is not going to make a great difference. Please do
not be afraid of this; babies are adaptable. I love them so much

for this.
Adults take a longer time to adjust to changes than chil-
dren. One of the gifts babies are born with is how easily they can
conform to our environment. They pick up some good habits
and some bad ones. It is so important to start off embracing
good habits first. Denying yourself or your family the enjoyment
of a special engagement like Grandma’s birthday or your niece
or nephew’s graduation should not be an issue. Scheduling
a baby should not prevent you from enjoying invitations to
events unless you are tired and need to skip the social event
or family functions like Thanksgiving, birthdays, or important
graduations. Of course, there are some places I would not take
a baby, like to a house of sick people or a very fancy restaurant.
But use your discretion, be safe, and make sound decisions
with all the parental instincts you were born with. Guide your
family soundly.
Speak to friends and family so they can understand the
whys of the way you choose to raise your baby. Parental imagi-
nation combined with persistence written out in a schedule
will bring understanding, comfort, peace, renewal, optimism,
and joy to your family.
Chapter 8
The Baby
Burping Ruler
I
t is very important to highlight the proper burping of a
baby. This is another topic that is not talked about enough
by many baby professionals. Most families I’ve worked for
will get one burp out of the baby and think, that’s it, the baby
is finished burping. This is so far from the truth. It takes many
burps for the baby to settle down and feel good. I always rec-
ommend in the beginning, when your newborn comes home
from the hospital, to burp the baby for every half ounce or one
full ounce of formula. Yes, the baby might get upset because
it wants more, or because it feels its distended stomach leave
it feeling very uncomfortable. Don’t worry about the fussiness
because he will feel better when some burps get out.
I’ve seen twins burped in rhythm. As I’m writing this, I
find it very hysterical but so true. I can reflect back on a time
when both twins I was watching were having a difficult time
burping and were a little constipated. We tried everything to
relieve their discomfort, when finally Sam burped his way free,
then Maggie followed immediately after with three burps as
if she was waiting for a signal from Sam. Just like the movie
Casablanca. “Play it again, Sam!”
Burping a baby again takes a lot of patience. It takes time
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and proper technique. Let’s look at positioning. The baby can

be positioned on the lap or over the shoulder. It is important
to give nice firm pats on the back in a circular motion, working
upward and downward. Then give your baby long strokes up
and down his back; also feel for any puffiness around your
baby’s sides, because this is where they are holding the air
you’re trying to burp out. Give special attention to those areas
and keep on massaging or patting until you hear a burp. Your
job is not over, because most times, your baby will have another
burp following the first. Therefore, pat about another minute
or until you feel the baby needs more breast milk or formula.
Learn to be aware, and you will advance your intuition about
burping and reading for gas problems. Be on the lookout for a
distended belly that is full of food and air. You can make your
baby feel comfortable one burp at a time.
You can also try long strokes and short or simple, solid pats
on one spot for one to two minutes. Be ready for some spitting
up, which is normal for babies because their stomach muscles
are weak and reflexive. With time, the baby’s muscles will get
stronger and the baby will hold her food down with little or
no spitting up. Burping the baby often enough will help to
minimize large volumes of spit-up. This I just can’t empha-
size enough: burping in the proper way with breaks between
ounces of feeding is essential to getting a calm, happy baby
with little discomfort.
As your little one grows, you can give two ounces of
formula or five more minutes or so of breastfeeding to satisfy
your baby’s growing hunger before burping. Some babies are
fast eaters and will finish two ounces in no time, but watch
very carefully to keep them from taking in too much before
burping, or you might have a very large spit-up coming your
way. Cover yourself with good soft burping cloths that are long
and organic, like Aden and Anais burping cloths and covers,
available at www.adenandanais.com. They are the best covers
and burping cloths to come on the market in some time. Tell

them that Dee Rule, The Baby Schedule Ruler, referred you. A lot
of high-profile families adore the comfort they bring. Their
blankets are money well spent, and the great thing is that they
can last for years. Get them and just love them!
Burping takes time—a lot of time. I always advise my clients
that burping is 80 percent of the total feeding. Don’t feed the
baby more food without burping—or if you feel it is necessary
to feed, then feed only a little and try burping. Take your time
and do not rush the day with your little one. Make burping
essential. You will get used to your baby’s signals. Babies will
signal to you for a burp by gestures and movements. Sometimes
they will automatically come off the breast and wiggle back
and forth. In their movements, they are telling you it’s time for
a burp. Look for these changes in demeanor and you will be
very happy, and your baby will be so satisfied to let that burp
out of its system.
In the very first moments of the newborn’s life, it is on a
mission. One of its missions is to seek comfort by relying on its
parents to become its “life reader.” You’re the most important
life they have; you’re the baby’s only parents. I want all parents
to believe in themselves and know that with practice, they will
be great parents.
Learning your baby’s personality is important for diagnosing
any ailments or discomfort it may feel. Other professionals call
recognizing your baby’s patterns motherly love or parental
instinct. I agree with these assessments, but I take it further
and say that knowing your baby’s personality is a sign that you
trust your “very being.” Hold your head up high and be proud
to have your daily life experiences to fall back on, allowing you
to question whether a particular baby behavior is troublesome
or normal. We all feel and react to things differently; let’s look
at the newborn as we view our own wants and needs. To make
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these observations will advance our awareness in caring for our

little ones.
I can reflect on the days of going to high school and what
kids would do for attention from other students and faculty
members. Remember the fart bomb that was so vulgar in smell
and when it was released it made us all very mad? That was not
forgivable! The students would urgently cover their noses and
open windows for fresh air. I recall a particular boy in my class
named Anthony. He was tall and smart and charming, but one
day in math class he let out a burp that completely turned me
off. It was so big that the other students laughed, but I was
appalled. What an animal, I thought. I just was recovering from
a fart bomb episode. He just had bad timing! He apologized
as though he hadn’t known it was coming. That said, over the
years, it’s been a joy to hear babies make that burping sound. It
melts my heart! I love to witness them being relieved from gas
pains. And yes, today I can forgive Anthony!
Chapter 9
Good Habits/Bad
Habits Ruler
T
he world benefits when we all get along and never irri-
tate each other. No matter what kinds of habits we have,
we can make peace happen. We try to deal with discom-
fort of changing our habits. We can consider the comfort and
joy that a certain behavior will give our fellow humans.
A child inherits some or all our traits and adds some of
his or her own habits or other outside habits of those around
them, like friends and family. Seeing and feeling different
behaviors sets off an adrenaline response. Exposure to some
traits might not be desirable, but the exposure to attractive
ones will ignite your little one.
Parents can start establishing good habits early in their
newborn’s life to help his day be acceptable, manageable, and
bearable. Why attract problems you cannot deal with today?
Most likely these problems will be a thorn in your side as they
get out of hand. Recognize what you’re doing that might give
negatively impact our families and attack those behaviors with
changes for the good. Good habits are the ticket to where you
want to go!
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The baby is sleeping now on my lap. I’ll wait a while before

I lay her down to sleep in her crib. I’ll be back!
In the beginning, there was the pacifier. We, as parents,

were never taught through medical training how to use this
instrument. We just saw it in the store and bought it. We have
given it as a baby shower gift and thought it would be useful for
a parent to be. Your friends and family members use it for their
children. But do we know the proper way to use the “binky”?
If your baby loves the pacifier, or binky, using ones
in different sizes and shapes is fine with me if it is okay for
you. The key to the pacifier is to use it only during the day.
Otherwise you can do without it. It’s not needed if your baby
can be comforted by other means. It’s one less habit to get rid
of.
Let’s look at the daytime pacifier love spell. This just might
describe your day with your little one. Maybe she struggles to
suck the pacifier. She will put up a fight for it or against it by
crying for it or spitting it out. She will have it in her mouth and
still fuss with it—this is the “binky war.” The binky gives her
more gas and makes her burp a whole lot more. She may spit
up on it and squirm or search for it constantly, even though it’s
in her mouth. Your little one may not feel it where she wants
it to be, and she might get upset by this. This struggle with the
binky will become a pain if you don’t have the patience to put
up with it.
What is a parent to do to think, sleep, and still be sane
every day? My answer is, only use the pacifier in the daytime, not
at night! The only exception to this rule is if you are traveling
a long distance or if you’re in a situation in which you can’t
think anymore. But if your baby is sleeping, take the pacifier
out of his mouth! He does not need to be reminded of the
sweet rubber.
The nights are for sleeping, and it will take some time
for your baby to learn to forget about the pacifier. This takes
time and persistence, but when accomplished, the family will
reap many nights of restful sleep. You must be adamant that
you will not give in because you have fed your baby and know
she is not hungry. Also, if you have burped and changed your
baby’s diaper and know he is not sick, you know for yourself
that everything is fine. Make sleep time the most important
time of the day, in which you, as the parent, will not give in
to the pacifier habit. Set a cutoff time for the pacifier. If it is
7:00 PM, keep to this time daily. Do not break the cutoff time
unless you’re traveling by car or plane and need to get to your
destination without trouble. This will be one of the best things
you can start doing for yourself and your little one.
Remember, the pacifier is not a bad thing. Some babies
have to have it, and some do not care about it. It is much better
if you can find something other than plugging the baby with
the binky with which to distract the baby. Be constructive and
find another thing your baby will love to do or be a part of.
Let your parental imagination take over and you will obtain
peaceful and joyful resolutions. Have fun!
The second habit is rocking in the rocker. Rocking is good
and is soothing to the baby. However, there comes a time when
the baby wants nothing more than to rock all day long. When
Desmond Morris wrote in his book on the study of humans and
other primates in The Naked Ape, he said, “The rocking motion
is carried on at about the same speed as the heartbeat, and
once again it probably ’reminds’ the infants of the rhythmic
sensations they became so familiar with inside the womb, as the
great heart of the mother pumped and thumped away above
them.” Your baby will remember and love this habit, and if
she falls into a light or deep sleep, she will eventually wake up
if you stop rocking or if you put her down in bed. So you will
need to repeat the cycle repeats itself. Your little one just can’t
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get enough of your heartbeat. It is one of the things she can

most remember listening to before she came into this world.
Newborns love your warm body, and it comforts them to be
close to you. I totally support body closeness—between Mommy
and baby, Daddy and baby—but it is also good for newborns
to learn some independence. Therefore, let’s not rock more
than five minutes at a time. Try to stop and rock a little, sometimes
stopping in a very subtle manner. Don’t be too aggressive with
the rocking. Also, try to change the routine by just holding the
baby and pausing with one or two rocks at a time until you can
pause for at least five minutes without waking the baby.
Another helpful action is to pat the baby on the back. Start
a rhythm that you love, like one from a song, and pat that
rhythm without rocking. Add pauses to the rhythm like on a
music sheet. Also, it is good to put the baby down as he drifts
away. Holding your baby way from your body a little at a time as
he falls into a deeper sleep. If you practice this more, you will
learn how to put the baby down to sleep without rocking and
the baby will learn what you’re trying to achieve and will give
up fussing after a few tries. Have you exercised on a treadmill
and after walking or running for a number of minutes, you
reach a point at which you give up and press stop? Your little
one can give up and fall asleep, but he won’t until he cannot
play tug of war with you any longer. He will fall asleep by the
helpful actions of a persistence parent.
It will be better to swaddle and hold the baby up high
on the shoulders, to apply pressure to his tummy with his
body weight and warmth. Having his arms out and over your
shoulder dangling is the perfect over-the-shoulder holding
position. Whether half swaddled or fully swaddled, place the
baby high enough so that his head is on your shoulder and is
positioned looking outward, not down. The baby’s head will
move back and forth, but she will eventually give up fussing
soon; just gently place the head into position will not allow her
to mistake your shoulder for a breast or nipple, as this will irri-

tate the baby if she thinks you might feed him. Just remember
to elevate the baby to a position at which she is comfortable.
• Please, no rocking and feeding the baby at the same

time! Because the baby will be drinking and digesting
as you feed it, rocking will make the baby spit up the
breast milk or formula. Rocking and feeding also makes
babies feel very dizzy.
Let’s Be Quiet Before Resting!

It is very important to be calm before going to sleep. Set a
calm atmosphere for your baby starting ten to fifteen minutes
before bedtime. Accomplishing this is different for every family,
but it can happen if you take note of the volume of sounds and
activities that are going on around you and your baby. The
TV, radio, conversations, cell phones, slamming of doors, and
even loud closing doors should be quieted. Go around your
home and make a note of all things that can be disruptive at
this time. Continue to live a normal life; just be more aware of
the surroundings because there are a lot of things we do not
concentrate on. At times we get used to the home rhythm and
we tune out what we want to put in the distance. I live near
the highway, and I tune out the trucks bumping over the road
because I have always lived in the city. For somebody from the
county, the highway would be a huge disruption. The baby will
need time to develop the ability to tune out loud noises. Time
is a healer. It provides sutures that sew up problems in our lives
to make things better.
Having a sound machine is wonderful way to block out
background noises, but it doesn’t block out your newborn’s
awareness of everything. We can try to quiet things down
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a little, but you do not have to live in a bubble. However, a

quieter and softer evening, naptime, or anytime before you
would like your baby’s rest time will benefit the whole family.
Let’s practice perfecting the mood we are trying to establish
in our daily routine. Be practical in establishing a sound sleep
time. I will help you to construct a totally active yet well-paced
day in which you and your family can find time to relax.
We want to imprint into the baby’s conscious and subcon-
scious mind more good habits than bad ones. Yes, babies must
be loved and pleased, and they are growing to like different
things around them: colors, smiles, and the sound of your
voice. These are positive memories, and with every passing day,
enforce positive feelings by enjoying your baby. Try to notice
if you’re rocking too much, because it will be too hard for the
baby to go to sleep without it.
Healthy Conversations
Parents should come together for healthy conversations.
They should talk in a friendly tone and not irritate each other.
Just say to your loved one, “Let’s have a healthy conversation
today about what you like about me and what I enjoy about
you.” Then direct your conversation toward your family. Talk
about what you like and expound on what you enjoyed about
your childhood and whether you would like your children to
experience some of that joy.
The idea is to renew each other’s love and passion. Sharing
thoughts about enjoyments will help each of you recognize and
plan how to have fun in your relationship. Dreaming of seeing
your family being like you’ve imagined cannot be emphasized
enough. Set the standard and express the feelings you love.
Do not keep good stories to yourself. Let others feel good in
return, and your loved one will open his or her heart and share
stories or past experiences.
If you cannot come up with a good conversation, then
cuddle up together and be comforted that you will have
another day with peace and love as your number one goal.
Light a scented candle and cozy up with a cup of tea. Bring out
a blanket and be yourself!
World peace starts at home. It begins to resonate from
the cradle. Babies are unbiased, but they grow to mimic bad
attitudes they see in adults. Our children can only follow our
example. Treat yourself the same way you treat your newborn.
Your life will improve. Change starts at home in the hearts of
all men and women.
Sit down for good conversations! See yourself being loved
the way you want to. Imagine the great adventures you will
have raising your baby. Then see yourself living that dream of
happiness and liberty. What is this liberty I speak of? It’s your
fears being hold back. Dark thoughts of a lack of success are
nonexistent. Start practicing with good talk.
Chapter 10
Breastfeeding Woes Cure

Ruler and the Daddy
Blues Ruler
B
reastfeeding is wonderful for the parent who
enjoys the idea, but it’s not very pleasant for moms
who dread breastfeeding or who cannot feed from the
breast due to stress and discomfort. It is very important to talk
about this. Never allow family or friends to force you to do
anything you do not enjoy doing.
Breastfeeding is not for everybody, and everybody is not
for breastfeeding. Genetics play a large part in whether you
get huge amounts of milk or small amounts. Drinking a beer
a day, having some fenugreek, and drinking lots of water can
be very helpful in producing more milk. But we came into this
world already programmed to give as much as is needed to our
babies. For the parent who has very little or no breast milk, feel
good that you were born with the best milk for your baby. It’s
good to give some amount of milk, but things could be much
worse than having low breast milk. Thank your lucky stars that
you have a beautiful family and a baby who wants lots of love
from you.
It’s okay to not want to breastfeed. On July 31, 2007, an article
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106 Dee Rule
ran in the New York Times by Sewell Chan titled, “Hey, Moms:
No More Baby Formula in the Hospital Gift Bag.” It talked
about how certain hospitals throughout the United States—in
New York, California, and Texas, to name a few—would not
offer formula in gift bags anymore due to the overwhelming
benefits of breastfeeding. “The decision by the New York City
Health and Hospitals Cooperation has not been universally
applauded.” To put forth new efforts to greatly discourage
women from formula feeding has caused the issue to reach
a boiling point. As reported in the article, this “has gone too
far, making women who find nursing hard or unpleasant feel
guilty or inadequate.”
The American Academy of Pediatrics pushes the support
of breastfeeding. They have stated that there are “health,
nutritional, immunological, social, economic, and environ-
mental benefits” for all breastfed babies. As far as I know, it is
not for everybody. A lot of people promote breastfeeding as
though their lives depended on it, but it’s important for you
to enjoy breastfeeding and not to feel as if you’re not human
anymore if you don’t breastfeed. Try not to allow yourself to
feel that you let your newborn down if you do not breastfeed.
He will be just fine and will develop well. My personal advice
is to know what you’re going to do before you have the baby.
Plan whether you’re going to try to breastfeed or not. Speak to
moms who have breastfed and moms who didn’t like it or just
couldn’t. You will get a sense of what your options will be like.
Most important, put on paper how long you’re going to breast-
feed. It is good to breastfeed for at least six weeks to start. Your
baby needs those ever-so-important antibodies that breast milk
provides.
Also, pumping and feeding the baby is a very good alter-
native if you do not like to bring the baby to the breast or
if you simply find pumping easier. It’s also good to give your
nipples a break from direct breastfeeding. It’s important to
give yourself alternatives to use when breast feeding. It’s good

for you to always know your exit. Plan this out! If you cannot
decide when you are pregnant, then decide later. I leave this up
to you. Centers for Disease Control suggest that moms should
breastfeed their babies for the first twelve months of life. The
World Organization suggest two years.
It is important that mothers do not develop insecurities
with breastfeeding. I have to say that some people rely on the
comfort it gives in order to avoid a lot of personal problems
that need to be resolved. Recognize that feeding your baby is
very beneficial to both of you; yet be aware if you are action of
breastfeeding for comfort when a problem strikes. Try dealing
with the problem on a non-breastfeeding level. Do not rely
on the comfort it gives you too much as a solution to personal
problems, because the comfort will not last forever. Be strong
for yourself. Sometimes the good feelings of breastfeeding can
alienate you from your husband and your loved ones. This is
extremely difficult for some people to understand. But I want
you to be aware of not keeping people away. If they do not
understand, help them understand. Keep socializing with
friends and family. Also, resolve any major problems as soon as
possible—don’t keep people who love you away. Open up and
feel free to discuss things that will be helpful.
Breastfeeding gives your baby nurture and helps her to
develop antibodies and to gain weight, as well as enhance
developmental abilities. It would be good to let others know
these facts so that they can better understand the joy you feel
when you feed your baby every day. It gives you security, and it
also passes that security on to the baby.
Mothers who are breastfeeding often wonder how much
milk their babies are getting and if it is enough. Your little one
will tell you if he is full or needs more milk or supplement with
a top-off of formula or breast milk sometimes. Once your little
one is gaining weight consistently, you have no need to worry.
108 Dee Rule
The only question that remains to be resolved is how much

extra milk he can keep down. Babies want a higher volume of
food as they grow, and they don’t know when to stop swallowing
sometimes. But what they do when they’re full is what’s important
for the mother to recognize.
If your baby twists and turns or makes funny sounds like
a billy goat while feeding, then she just needs a helpful burp.
These sounds are a strong indication that she wants a little
more but needs to free up some room in her tummy.
When your baby makes these sounds, a poo might be on its
way. Babies like to take a pause sometimes when breastfeeding
or bottle feeding to think about whether they need to poo.
Extra room is vital for them so they can consume more of the
rich, fulfilling taste of Mommy’s warm milk. Beware of move-
ments so you can comfort your baby! Question your baby’s
actions and then follow your parental instincts.
As for your husband or partner, who might feel left out,
he will get over it. It’s a big change to have a new little one
sharing Mommy. Be patient with your loved one and he should
be extra patient with you! Let him know this! He must expect that
things might not be romantic for a long time. It’s time to care for the
newborn. I’ve learned that words can be very hurtful, because
the person you speak to might translate what you say to his or
her liking and might infer negativity in your words, although
you might have meant them to be positive. Sometimes what we
say can come across as an insult. It breeds anger, not under-
standing. It will take time for us to turn things around to be
positive or for the receiver to simply completely forget. Having
a mediator can bring comfort.

Let’s practice love first, and then romance will come
running to the bedroom. We need to heal from the
delivery and learn to take care of the little one first.
Your loved one will eventually come around and bond as

you have bonded with the baby. Remember to always put your-
self first. Whatever you do or try to accomplish in life, let it be
worth the effort. You want to look back and say, “It wasn’t a
mistake. I planned it out and took all necessary steps to have
a fulfilling life.” To have a newborn now is wonderful because
you cannot allow any bad things to happen. You’re an experi-
enced person, and your baby can grow with the expectation
that whatever you decide is for his benefit.
Now lets take a deeper look into breastfeeding and what
breast milk is mainly composed of. First, make sure you are in
a comfortable position with head pillows or a pillow designed
for nursing, such as a Boppy pillow. Have something to drink
nearby and be relaxed. You’re a person of great care and well-
being, and everything is going to be all right if you relax. Turn
on your favorite TV program or simply listen to music you
like. This time is not a good time to have everybody asking
you questions. You need to be calm and stress free when you
breastfeed, please!
Dr. Masaru Emoto’s book, The Hidden Messages in Water,
blew me away. He asked, “How can people live happy and
healthy lives?” I had to include his conclusion in full:
Understanding the fact that we are essentially water is the

key to uncovering the mysteries of the universe … the
various events that unfold throughout a person’s life are
events reflective in water.
Hidden Messages In Water
—Dr. Masaru Emoto
By photographing samples of water and then freezing

the water, he took photos of the shapes that were formed.
He played music to these water samples and froze the shape
of the vibrations. Some shapes were beautiful crystal forms
110 Dee Rule
like snowflakes. Depending on what type of music he played,

these water crystals took on different forms. Some were very
abstract and could not be identified as a beautiful crystal. He
spoke to the water with words like “thank you,” and the water
took on a beautiful crystal form. However, when he said to the
water, “You fool!” the water crystals were formless or abstract.
Every parent, human, society, religion, nonreligion, criminal,
president, teenager, environmentally conscious person, non-
environmentally conscious person, and counselor should take
a look at the amazing pictures of his research. Dr. Masaru
Emoto’s pictures shook my life and all the water in me!
“We start out life being 99% water, as fetuses, when we

are born, we are 90% percent water … adulthood we are
down to 70%… old age, we will probably be about 50%
water.”
—Dr. Masaru Emoto
Do what you love! Do your thing! I love to play tennis and

when Jackie Sandler said, “Dee, do your thing!” I feel encour-
aged and happy to be doing that thing I love. Our very beings
enjoy the things we do well. Putting aside what we love when
having a newborn will stifle our minds, spirits, and all water
supplies. Wellness is established by having the majority of what
we are made of performing by doing, thinking, reading, loving
others, socializing, singing, being funny like Adam Sandler
and Goldie Hawn, watching our favorite shows like Rules of
Engagement and Two and a Half Men, and hugging our babies to
achieve harmony. That perfect crystal will form. That’s beauty
within!
The baby’s mommy is going out to the park and will meet
the daddy there. I’m going to put some things together
and will continue this important chapter. Don’t go away!
When you breastfeed, you must make sure the baby has
a good latch. Open the baby’s mouth wide and let him get a
good wide grip on your areola, not just the nipple. If the baby
only has the nipple in his mouth, you will suffer a lot of pain
during feeding and after. Listen to your baby as it feeds. If you
are not hearing it swallow, then the baby is just nibbling and
not eating. Nibbling happens when the baby is sucking the
nipple and using your breast as a pacifier but not drinking.
It’s very easy for this to happen; therefore, you should always
check for proper sucking. If you need to take the baby off to
adjust his latch, on the second or third try, lower the baby’s
jaw with your finger to get the baby into a wide-mouthed latch.
Don’t be afraid of not getting it right always. A lot of prac-
tice will make you fearless, and you’ll feel very happy. Feel the
difference! Also, make sure you get some lanolin and apply it
to your nipples after feeding.
“No pain, no palm; no thorns,

no throne; no gall, no glory;
no cross, no crown.”
—William Penn
If you are breastfeeding and your breasts are sore or

engorged, take a warm towel and place it over your breasts
until the towel is cool. Repeat this about three times to help
break the milk down and ease the pain; feed after or pump if
it’s not feeding time!
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Conditions that might prevent your baby from getting

enough from the breast:
A. The baby is less than five and a half pounds at

birth
B. The mother has very large nipples
C. The baby has mouth distortions like a high

palate or a cleft lip and palate
D. The baby is a preemie
E. The baby is dehydrated
Always be in contact with your

doctor for advice. Know that every
pediatrician has a different way to
handle things.
Helpful Latch-on Tips
There are times when latching on is very problematic.

It can feel like the baby does not want any more milk, is
just not happy, or does not want to latch on. We can try
these helpful things:
1. Put one ounce of breast milk or formula in a

bottle. Using the Avent bottles, just minister a
few drops at a time to your breast so that your
baby can taste the milk as if it’s already in his
mouth. Soon you will find your baby searching
for the nipple and eventually getting a good

latch.
2. Burp the baby over your shoulder or on your lap

in an upright position, at the same time giving
firm pats on the back. I suggest working your
way upward then downward. It will take some
time for the burp to come out, but be patient,
and it will happen before you know it.
3. Squeeze your breast a little, massaging it and

directing your fingers downward toward your
nipples. Keep on doing this until you get some
milk, then direct your baby to open up wide
by gently pulling your little one’s jaw down for
a great latch as you bring your baby to your
breast.
Things to Avoid When Nursing
A. Nipple shields. They can suppress good stimula-

tion of the sinuses under the areola from the
sucking.
B. Stressful environments
C. Arguments
D. Any highly gassy foods, caffeine, and chocolate
When feeding, it is good to start feeding the baby for ten

minutes before burping and to repeat another ten minutes
until you have fed for half an hour total. Feed every three
hours to start, and make sure you wake your baby up for a
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feeding in the daytime and allow your baby to sleep for four
to five hours in the night before feeding again. Your little one
might want to feed before the scheduled time, and you can
allow this, but not before three hours have elapsed since the
last feeding. In “Parental Persistence,” I speak about how to go
about feeding on a schedule. This chapter really gets into the
facts and benefits of my system. Please review it. Here are some
tips for breastfeeding.
Keep on a nursing bra all times to help protect your back from
the pain of the ever-increasing weight of your breasts.
Always wear a nursing pad inside your bra to prevent
embarrassing leaks.
Keep your body hydrated and eat healthy meals regularly will
help your production of milk. If you excise daily, please
keep drinking water after working out because breast
milk is over 80 percent water. The baby needs it and the
mommy does too. You might forget to keep hydrated.
The best solution for this is to always keep a bottle of
water or something to drink in the place you know you
are going to breastfeed.
Play music or turn on the TV. I highly recommend this tech-

nique. This will keep you feeling great and not feeling
that everything has to change in your life. It is not true
that you have to stop doing the things in life you so
love doing. Stop thinking this way and do not listen to
people who pressure you to change your love of things
that uplift you. The TV and music are entertainment
and make you feel youthful and happy. Don’t take that
away from yourself. Keep your heart free to explore,
and you will overcome all obstacles. Situations will be
easy to deal with, but confusion has no business being
where you feed. If you feel a certain conversation is not

making you happy, it is not making your baby happy
either. Never feed your baby when you’re upset. Try to
avoid any disruptions that don’t make you and baby feel
good.
Sickness in the Time of Breastfeeding

When you come down with a cold or the flu, do not inter-
rupt breastfeeding. Most likely your baby will have already been
exposed to the virus that caused you to be sick. You produce
antibodies against the illness that will reach the baby through
your breast milk. Please eat something and drink plenty of
water. Do not wean your little one. Also, your milk supply might
decrease a little, but it will increase again after the illness has
passed. Giving your baby beast milk give fluids and vital nour-
ishment until the end of this sickness.
Fever is a sign of illness and infection. For the first five
months, your baby’s temperature should not be greater than
one hundred. If you find it climbing upward, contact your
pediatrician as soon as possible. Feed your baby frequently
when your little one has a fever because it can lead to dehydra-
tion, and it’s important to replace the lost fluids. Look out for
fewer wet diapers and a very dry mouth.
Mom’s Mental State on the Down Side

Most women go through emotional changes after giving
birth, but when emotional swings are severe, the mom is
problem experiencing postpartum depression. One out
of ten new mothers will have postpartum depression and
some will have the alienating postpartum psychosis that can
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cause hallucinations and mental confusion. A very stressful

pregnancy or a difficult birth can trigger postpartum depres-
sion, as can spousal abuse or family abuse. The Institute of
Psychiatry located in London researched postpartum depres-
sion and showed that depressed moms had experienced some
type of depression during pregnancy and that this depression
continued after birth. This state of depression some moms
experience has led to infant deaths.
“The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely, or

unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be
quite alone with the heavens, nature, and God. Because
only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that
God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty
of nature. As long as this exist, and then there will always
be comfort for every sorrow, whatever the circumstances
may be. And I firmly believe that nature brings solace in
all troubles.”
—Anne Frank
Please Watch out for These Signs or

Changes within Yourself
1. Thoughts of suicide
2 Crying every day
3. Compulsive worries or strong guilty feelings
4. Lack of appetite and a desire to always stay in bed
5. No interest in things you love to do

6. Isolation from friends and family a
7. Irrational outbursts

“So when you feel like hope is gone, look inside you and
be strong …”
Mariah Carey, Hero
It is important to contact your physician if you are expe-

riencing these feelings. Keep your mind healthy through
meditation and positive thinking. Opening up about all your
feelings and fears to a loved one or friend is a great start.
Daddy Depression
Dads can experience depression in the weeks before and
after the birth of a newborn. This may seem odd to some
people because dads don’t carry the baby for nine months,
but what dads can become depressed and fearful, they may
not feel good enough, and they may have financial pressures.
These can overcrowd a dad’s priorities and thoughts.
Can you imagine the amount of men who feel left out?
Even though they are there with you and are holding the
baby, they can feel left out because the baby has the moth-
er’s breast now. Men can get a little jealous when a mother
breastfeed but it is all natural for them to experience this.
I am so glade to let this out because it is not talked about
thoroughly by some couples. It’s an emotional transition
for the whole family. Who in the world can they speak to
about this besides their wives and not get an uncomfort-
able response? Men like to keep their feelings quiet, and
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this can cause conflict. Time will give them loving patience.
They will bond with the baby and grow. Sometimes they
will not bond as fast as they want to, but it will happen
soon enough.
“My husband is going crazy!" This was a message I received

in New York from a mother whose babies were five months old
and never slept through the night.
“How did you get my number?" I asked.
“From a lady whose twin boys I care for in New York,” she
replied.
“Oh,” I said. “Why is your husband losing his mind?”
“He is forcing me to feed the babies at any time in the
night and wants me to do all the wake ups after being with
the babies all day long. He is not being supportive and is now
driving me mad.”
“Relax,” I said. “Tell me about your babies’ day. How often
do you feed them? Do you go outside with them often?’
She answered, “The babies feed every three and a half
hours, and we put them down to bed just after 8:00 PM. Also,
we do not go outside with them very often because it is too
much for me. They never like to stroll into stores.”
I responded, “Here is the plan.” I gave her the outline of
Baby Feeding Schedule C for babies who are three months and
older. I told her to go outside with the babies in the morning
for an hour and another hour in the late afternoon. I said,
“You are going to start ghost feedings.”
“What is that?" she asked.
“It is a feeding you give to the babies in very low light. You
give this feeding two to two and a half hours after you put them
down for the night. After feeding, you burp them and put them
down to con-tinue sleep.”
“How much formula or breast milk should I give?" she
asked.
“Three to four ounces is a good start. Sometimes your

babies will only want one to two ounces. Do not worry; that
means they are content with that. Just burp them and put them
down to sleep. It is important to say nothing at this time. Do
you have a sound machine?”
“Yes.”
“Then you’re set to have a better night.”
She text messaged me three days later and said, “I wanted
to call or text you two days ago, but I didn’t want to jinx the
night. The boys have been sleeping at least ten hours for the
last three nights, and my husband and I are getting impor-
tant, much-needed rest. Your advice saved my sanity and my
husband’s. We didn’t have the extra money to hire a night
nanny or nurse. You have saved us a bundle. Now we walk the
babies twice a day. We enjoy the park, and sometimes I can go
into the stores quickly if they are asleep. I just can’t wait for
your book to be out there. It is going to help support a lot of
families back to sanity. Thank you, thank you. Between going
outside twice a day for walks and the ’ghost feedings,’ your
advice has changed my life. My husband can enjoy the boys
more, and I don’t feel I have to constantly feed them for every
cry.”
Some men will express their concerns and try to deal with
their anxieties and low feelings by speaking to family and
friends. “The father’s functioning as a support person is key
…” (Holopainen 2007). Depression is a family problem, not
just a personal problem, because it affects love and harmony.
Families can talk about depression in fathers, and men can
express their feelings and concerns. Just getting it out there,
spitting to the other side of the universe what is troublesome,
is the first step for healing the stress. Please contact a doctor
who can take you through the necessary steps and help turn
things around for the good of the family.
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Signs to Watch out for in Depressed Dads:
1. High levels of stress
2. Dreams of harming the baby
3. Lack of sleep
4. Abnormally high sex drive
5. Strong outbursts of anger
6. Not playing or cuddling with the baby
7. Increased addictive habits like heavy drinking
8. Impatience with the baby crying
9. Not being helpful in the home
Mothers and fathers need to support each other. They

should not divide the love they’ve created but deal with diffi-
culties one day at a time. Love will heal any concerns, thereby
setting in motion healing, compassion, attention, patience,
peace, and bonding with the newborn.
“Fathers who feel supported by their partners in finding

their own ways of caring for their infants are likely to
develop a strong connection to their babies, and are also
unlikely to develop depression.”
—Cowan and Cowan, 1988
Parents can write down all of their fears on a notepad. Set

a date and time to review all these problems and ideas and
hopefully work things out in a calm and responsible way. Form

a strategy on the things you need to pay more attention to
or change. These get-togethers can help get parents through
the everyday ups and downs. School districts, societies, athletic
clubs, business groups, networks, advertisers, churches, police
departments, presidents, and others use a forum to come
together to find solutions. Taking a statistical view of your days
and weeks will sharpen your relationship. Also, it will make
your loved one think first instead of acting out. Write your feel-
ings down first, and then think about them. Then decide if
you should communicate your feelings on the appointed day
or simply erase the problem because you’ve found a peaceful
resolution. You will thoughtfully go over how to make a better
day for the family. Whatever the situation may be, it will slow
down an angry response.
“There’s something about slow motion. It gives us enough

time to change our minds.”
—Dee Rule
It’s a good idea to review your wants. Take time a do this, and
life can be slowed down and improved. We want to see improve-
ments, so list your concerns and work out all mental steps and
the funds that are needed to make your family happy. Let’s not
walk around with sadness for too long. Place these thoughts on
paper and leave them there. If it’s not critical that you speak
about your thoughts right now, let the paper become like a
stop sign to you. Stop and look left and right! Think it through.
How am I going to solve the problem that’s bugging me? Our
society is always rushing, and we want answers right away. Many
times finding answers to problems takes a very long time, but
an answer will come. Take a deep breath. Sometimes forgetting
can be just as beneficial as thinking. Always remember to put
happiness first. In the “Who Do You Love" survey I took, most
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parents responded with material things, and the love they had
for family and friends. Most of these individuals spoke of them-
selves last. Out of fifty people, thirty-six of them remembered
themselves last or close to last.
“If I find that some particular thing is causing me to have

stress, that’s a warning flag for me. What it means is there’s
something that I haven’t completely identified, perhaps
in my conscious mind, that is bothering me, and I haven’t
yet taken any action on it. I find as soon as I identify it,
and make the first phone call, or send off the first e-mail
message, or whatever it is that we’re going to do to start to
address that situation—even if it’s not solved—the mere
fact we’re addressing it dramatically reduces any stress
that might come from it. So stress comes from ignoring
things that you shouldn’t be ignoring, I think, in large
part.”
—Jeffrey Bezos
Founder and CEO of Amazon.com
Conclusion
SCHEDULE REVIEW
The Baby Schedule Ruler A
T
his starter is for babies who are between one and six
weeks of age.
Feeding Times:
You should feed at 8:00 AM, noon, 3:00 PM, 6:00
PM, 9:00 PM, and at four- to five-hour intervals
at night. If the baby is very hungry, you should
feed the baby any time before the fourth or
fifth hour, but not before three hours. After this
feeding, go another four to five hours before
feeding again. Also try to feed your baby at 8:00
or 9:00 in the morning if you can. Also, a good
opportunity for a top-off is the late morning.
But try to get back on schedule by feeding on
time at the next feeding, the noon feeding.
123
124 Dee Rule
The Baby Schedule Ruler B:

This schedule is for babies between six and twelve weeks
old.
Feeding Times:
You should feed the baby at 9:00 AM, 12:30 PM,
4:00 PM, 7:30 PM, and at five- to six-hour inter-
vals at night. Try to not give anything until at
least five hours after the last feeding. The last
feeding is the ghost feeding. If your baby is doing
six- to seven-hour stretches after the 8:00 PM or
8:30 PM feedings, you do not need to give ghost
feedings. Your baby can have a night feeding,
but put the baby down after burping and don’t
talk to him or rock him. Also, try to feed close
to 9:00 AM, but if you cannot, then start feeding
at 8:00 AM if the baby is very hungry. As the
baby grows, you might need to give him an
early-morning feeding at 6:00 or 7:00 AM. But
get back on schedule by 9:00 AM. Flexibility is
needed for a growing baby.
Ghost feedings are feedings that are done two to two and
a half hours after the bedtime feeding. You tiptoe into the
nursery armed with about three or four ounces of formula or
breast milk, and you say nothing. Begin to feed your baby in
dim light, burp him, and put him down to continue to sleep.
Then you leave like a ghost.
The Baby Schedule Ruler C

This schedule is for babies beginning at twelve weeks and
ending when they are sleeping through the night.
Feeding Times:
You should feed the baby at 8:00 AM or 9:00
AM, 11:30 AM or 12:30 PM, 4:00 PM, and 7:30
PM. Then the baby can sleep as long as ten or
eleven hours. Also, you must decide the time
when you would like your baby to fall asleep.
This time must be enforced nightly. Try setting
8:00 PM or 8:30 PM as the goodnight time.
The baby gets a bottle as soon as he wakes up after ten or

more hours, beginning from the time he actually goes down
to sleep. As time goes by, the 9:00 AM feeding will become
the breakfast feeding with solids, but you can give your baby a
bottle if he is fussy after 6:00 AM in the mornings.
It’s been incredible. These last few years, there has been a
baby boom like no other. I just can’t walk a block without seeing
an expecting mother. Twins have been on the rise. There are
nonstop TV shows about pregnancy and babies coming home
from the hospital, as well as living with multiples and raising
expanding families. Celebrities are in on the baby trend, and
most trends start in Hollywood. Halle Berry, Jessica Alba,
and Christina Aguilera are expecting, and Jennifer Lopez is
waiting to deliver twins, and many more babies are on the way
in Hollywood.
In 2007, Nancy Grace and David Linch had twins, and
joining them is Marcia Cross. I can go on singing the praises
of the baby boom. I always thought as the stock market goes,
so does the stork.
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Keep your mind sharp, healthy, and most of all, free. Create
great memories. Imagine the possibilities. A challenge is a good
thing! Get your loved ones involved. Have a get-together, but
allow rest and peace. Get out of the house. Keep on schedule!
Time is what we do with it. Spend one minute on arguments
and twenty-four hours on creating peace.
Be always in your little one’s thought pattern. Spend as
much time as possible to engage your mind into his world.
Living the dreams you want for his future will liberate you
from some depression. Take action to enhance your happi-
ness, doing what you love.
Who do you really love? Who should you care about the
most? We all have different answers, but I can say I must love
all people by first not discriminating against myself. The
parable of loving your neighbor as yourself is so true. That is
true happiness for me. I just could not leave any soul out.
Breastfeeding can be very challenging. Being a new dad
can be shocking, but love is always welcoming.
The spirit always grows, even in different seasons. It’s a baby
on the way. Do not be in your way of growth. It’s an opportu-
nity to enjoy a new soul. This is the time for all to grow in
heart. The human intuition can be perfected if we only listen.
Stubbornness needs to be put on pause. Learn the baby way
and achieve the great joy you seek.
The Baby Schedule Ruler’s schedules A, B, and C can be
mastered and used as you desire. Adjust them, as you need to.
Be strong and always ask for help.
Let’s keep on helping the family be unique by accom-
plishing all the desires of life.
“Parents, however old they and we may grow to be, serve

among other things to shield us from a sense of our doom.
As long as they are around, we can avoid the fact of our

mortality; we can be innocent children.”
—Jane Howard
THINGS WE NEED IN
THE NURSERY
1. Suction bulb and Little Noses saline solution
2. Cool air humidifier
3. A breast pump
4. A and D ointment, Balmex, and Aquaphor ointment
5. Digital thermometer
6. Diapers (Huggies or Pampers)
7. Unscented wipes
8. Wipes warmer
9. Cetaphil lotion, baby wash, and baby shampoo
10. Diaper Dekor (for disposing of dirty diapers)
11. Changing table pads
12. Sound machine

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13. Music player
14. Burping cloths and baby wraps (swaddling blankets)
15. Nail clipper and first aid kit
16. Dark blinds for the windows
17. Baby bathtub
18. Wash cloths and towels
19. The Avent sterilizer
20. A crib or bassinet
21. Changing table
22. A room listening monitor
* These are suggestions therefore, please pick or choose

what you like. Shop baby, shop!!!
End Notes
Bezos, Jeffrey, Interview by The Academy of Achievement,

San Antonio, TX, May 4, 2001.
Chan, Sewell, “Hey, Moms: No More Baby Formula in the Hospital

Gift Bag,” New York Times, July 31, 2007.
Condon, S. William, “Culture Microrhythms,” Interaction

Rhythms: Periodicity in Communicative Behavior, New York:
Human Science Press, 1982.
Corvy, R. Stephen, “The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People,”

New York: Simon and Schuster, 1999.
Cowan, P.A., and Cowan, C.P. Changes In Marriage During the

Transition to Parenthood: Must We Blame the Baby? The
Transition to Parenthood: Current Theory and Research.
Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 1988.
Czikszentmihalyi, Mihaly. Creativity: Flow and Psycology Of

Discovery And Intervention, New York: Harper Collins, 1996.
De Bono, Edward. Lateral Thinking, London: Penguin, 1970.
Emoto, Masaru. Trans. Thayne, David A. The Hidden Messages in

Water, Hillsboro, Oregon: Beyond Words Publishing, 2004.
129
130 Dee Rule
Harlow, H.F. “The Nature Of Love,” American Psychol. 13

(1958).
Holopainen, D. (2002). “The Experience of Seeking Help

for Postnatal Depression.” Australian Journal of Advanced
Nursing.
MSNBC, Lock Up: San Quentin, December 2, 2007.
Meryl Streep. Commencement Address, The University of New

Hampshire. Durham, NH, May 24, 2003.
Morris, Desmond. The Naked Ape, New York: McGraw-Hill,

1967.
Rosenbloom, Stephanie, “My Dad, American Inventor,” New York

Times, New York, August 16, 2007.
“Heart-Beat Response,” Sack, 1966.

Questions and Answers

I’ve included this question-and-answer section because of
the overwhelming number of questions I have had to answer
throughout my years of working. A lot of these questions are
helpful to parents who need quick answers to their everyday
problems. I hope these answers will be comforting to you.
One
Q. When can I start giving my newborn baths?
A. Wait until the umbilical cord falls off, and then
wait perhaps up to a week to make sure the navel is
completely drained and closed. You do not want to
risk an infection.
Two
Q. How long should we continue to sterilize our baby’s
bottles?
A. Six months to a year.
Three
Q. I am having problems breastfeeding during the
evenings or late afternoons. Why is that?
A. Milk flow deceases throughout the day for most
women. In the mornings, your milk volume is higher
than at any other time. Drinking plenty of water,
having healthy meals, and drinking a beer will help
kick things in a little more.
Four
Q. How long should I allow my toddler to use a pacifier?
A. Parents can implement a cut-off time, preferably at
bedtime, when they decide not to allow the pacifier
132 Dee Rule
anymore. I think you should try to do away with the

binky as soon as your baby and you have had enough
of it. Good luck!
Five
Q. How long should a baby sleep during the day?
A. It depends on the baby’s genes. Some babies will sleep
all day when they’re in a growth spurt, and others will
sleep no more than three hours. The key is to direct
your little one to take long naps when you would like
them to on a daily basis. It’s good to encourage your
little one and not force him to sleep if he does not
want to. Then he will sleep all night long.
Six
Q. What is the best diaper brand today?
A. I like Huggies. They are great, and I find they hold a
lot better. Huggies are a good start.
Seven
Q. What if I prefer to bottle feed instead of breast-
feeding? Will my baby be less attached to me?
A. Absolutely not! Your little one will be so delighted
to have food in its tummy. Do not worry; there are
different ways to bond with a baby. The most effective
way to bond is to be with your baby and think about
his needs.
Eight
Q. Should I use a bassinet or crib for my newborn baby?
A. I like the idea of a bassinet when the baby is very
small. You can put your little one in a crib when she
gets bigger. A crib is also fine if you do not want both
or if you have a limited amount of space.
Nine
Q. What if my baby doesn’t want to suck on a pacifier?
How can I convince my baby to enjoy a binky?
A. Your baby is not a pacifier baby naturally. Just say
thank goodness. I would not advise you to force your
little one to use it. It’s better to not have to think
about it; you’re better off without it. Just keep him
occupied with other things. Distraction is a cure for
boredom.
Ten
Q. My baby spits up a lot. Is there a way to make things
better?
A. One way to make things better is to burp your baby a
lot and to sit your baby up after a feeding for fifteen
minutes or longer.
Eleven
Q. How soon can I start playing with my baby in a baby
gym?
A. You can start as soon as your baby is alert at some time
during the day. It is a great opportunity to have awake
time or up time until they become worn out.
Twelve
Q. What are the best baby bottles for breastfeeding
babies?
A. The Avent bottles are good for breastfed babies. Its
wide mouth encourages the baby to open up wide to
latch on. Also, this brand has a solid nipple that is not
too soft, which allows the baby to have a good grip.
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Thirteen
Q. What is a good age to start some tummy time with my
baby?
A. At two to four weeks old if your baby is doing well. It is
important to always watch your baby and to not leave
his sight when he is on his tummy. Encourage him to
look up and be playful with a rattle. You can place him
in a baby gym and have lots of fun. Occasionally give
him a break from being on his tummy and roll him
onto his back.
Fourteen
Q. How soon can I travel with my baby to another
country or state?
A. Your doctor can better advise you on this, but I would
wait until the baby receives its first shots.
Fifteen
Q. What detergents should I use to wash my baby’s
clothes? Can I take to the dry cleaners some very
expensive or delicate clothes?
A. I like to use Ivory Snow or Dreft to wash baby clothes;
the Seventh Generation also has a good detergent.
It is fine to take your baby’s clothes to the cleaners.
Some cleaners use organic products to clean but,
always put on an undergarment on your baby when
they wear dry cleaned clothes.
Sixteen
Q. How often should I give my baby a bath?
A. You can give your baby a bath twice a week to start
off. Then bathe him every other day once he is three
months old to prevent excessive dryness. If your little
one is experiencing red cheeks and patches of dry
skin patches, decrease the baths to every two days or

twice a week. Good luck!
Seventeen
Q. What can I take that will help me produce more
breast milk?
A. You can have a beer every day because the fermenta-
tion helps produce more milk. Also, you can have
fenugreek and drink plenty of water because breast
milk is mostly water.
Eighteen
Q. I have a three-year-old and a newborn. How can I get
the three-year-old to not be jealous of the newborn?
A. Have your three-year-old participate in feedings as
well as diaper changes and picture taking. It is impera-
tive that he shares some time together with you so that
he does not feel left out.
Nineteen
Q. How soon should I stop breastfeeding and begin
weaning the baby off the breast?
A. I leave this up to the parent. Some mothers do three
months and others breastfeed for a year. It is good
to give yourself a cut-off point. After a while, you will
notice your baby will not want to breastfeed. That
could be a sign that you should start thinking of
weaning.
Twenty
Q. I feel overwhelmed when I see another baby doing
things my baby is not doing. Is this something to look
into? My baby is six months old.
A. It depends on how your doctor feels about you little
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one’s growth. Six months is usually too early to decide

if your baby is not developing well. All babies are born
with their own timing of growth. Some babies take two
years to catch up with their peers. Keep in touch with
your pediatrician on any concerns of development.
Twenty-one
Q. What is the best baby lotion and wash?
A. I think the best baby lotion and wash are the Cetaphil
products because they are so gentle. But Aveeno also
has a great baby body wash and lotion that parents
love. I also love it because it gives a high feeling of
quality. It is a great brand for the price. Just make sure
whatever products you use are hypoallergenic.
Twenty-two
Q. How soon can I put my baby in an infant play-sitting
chair?
A. It’s good to wait until your baby is one month old, but
if your little one is very strong and alert and is consid-
ered a tall baby, you can put him in the play chair by
three weeks. I like to wait because they are so fragile.
Also, the pressure of their weight on their small backs
can be a strong discomfort the longer they sit in
upright. Look for signs that your baby has had enough
of the play chair. They may start to fuss in intervals by
this I mean on and off cries or they might frown a lot.
Twenty-three
Q. My baby has a rash on his face. Could it be an allergic
reaction to something he had or to something I had?
He is eight months, and we haven’t changed anything
he was eating yet.
A. This is a normal kind of allergic reaction to different
foods and hormones. They usually go away by them-

selves. Just do not wipe excessively. Contact your
doctor if the rash gets worse. Sometimes it takes up to
three weeks to see an improvement.
Twenty-four
Q. When is a good time to start giving my baby a sippy
cup?
A. The sooner the better after six months. You can start
giving your baby one sippy cup a day, then increase
it to two and so forth. You can keep the bottle for
bedtime feedings or naptime feedings. If you’re
breastfeeding, you can start weaning to one sippy cup
a day.
Twenty-Five
Q. How long should I keep my baby in a playpen? She’s
seven months old.
A. No more than fifteen minutes at a time. You want to
give your baby freedom but not to limit her capabili-
ties by staying in a playpen for long periods. Babies
and toddlers need structure and love, not severe
confinement.
Twenty-six
Q. At what age can we start propping our baby up to
enjoy playing and pull her up to sitting?
A. When your baby reaches the age of six months, it will
be a good time to have most of her play on the floor.
Sitting up in a frog position is a great start. Make
sure you support the baby well with yourself or with
pillows. And get busy enjoying the creative times.
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Twenty-seven
Q. What if I do not like breastfeeding but prefer to pump
with a breast pump?
A. That is fine. Your baby is getting the best milk whether
you pump or bring the baby to your breast to suck. Do
not feel forced into bringing the baby to the breast if
you’re not comfortable. Many mothers, whether first-
or second-time moms, pump and give their babies
pumped breast milk. You are a good mother regard-
less! Pump on!
Twenty-eight
Q. How soon can a baby go outside on walks?
A. They can go outside for daily walks by two weeks old
if the weather permits. Otherwise, wait for one month
or so to pass to go out on long walks. It’s good to take
short walks and then increase them as your baby gets
older.
Twenty-nine
Q. What if my loved one doesn’t feel comfortable
holding or feeding the baby?
A. It takes some time for some people to feel comfort-
able with a newborn. Do not be forceful, but interact
with the baby around your loved one as much as
possible, and soon the fear of being around some-
thing so small will decrease. Also, allow your partner
to help out in other ways by going to the store to pick
up items you need or to simply ask for help instead of
arguing.
Thirty
Q. Dee, you told me to use A and D ointment during the
day and switch to Balmex or any ointment that has

zinc oxide in it for nights. What is the reason for this?
A. Babies’ skin is very soft and fragile. It will get used to
one particular product if you use that product every
day for a long time. It’s good to change products
sometimes or exchange the times of their use. Diapers
also can be exchanged, as well as daily lotions and
detergents. Just do not use one particular product for
months on end. Change over to other brands when
you see some dryness or redness. Good luck!
Thirty-one
Q. My baby fusses all the time when exiting the bath.
What can I do to make things better?
A. Babies do not like to leave their warm baths because
most times, they get chills by being brought back to
room temperature. You can heat up the room temper-
ature two to three degrees. Also, you can cover your
baby with two blankets as you take him out of the tub.
Please have at least another person with you to give
the baths until you feel comfortable giving baths by
yourself. Enjoy! Splash, splash!
Thirty-two
Q. How long should I swaddle my baby? He seems to like
it now, but in the beginning, he hated it.
A. It is common for some babies to give a little fight
to get into a swaddle, but they learn to love it after
some time. I highly recommend full swaddling for
no longer then three months, but if your baby was a
preemie, you can swaddle for up to four months. After
three months or sooner, you can half swaddle your
baby until he just doesn’t need it anymore?
140 Dee Rule
Thirty-three
Q. My twins are nine months old. How soon should I
allow them to begin feeding themselves?
A. Your twins should be trying to feed themselves with a
spoon the very first day you begin solids. I expect they
were having solids by five to six months old. Allow
them to scoop with you and direct their hand with
yours. It gets messy, but it’s worth it in the long run.
Thirty-four
Q. My twins are one year old and continue to wake each
other up in the middle of the night. Is this the best
time to separate them?
A. It could be if they are not getting enough sleep, and
you feel like a zombie as well. They will still love you,
especially for some good sleep.
Thirty-five
Q. When is a good time for my baby to start wearing
sunscreen?
A. By six months old and no sooner.
Thirty-six
Q. When will my little baby begin to see color?
A. Babies in general begin to see colors by six to seven
weeks. Some will see sooner and some a week or two
later. But they can see you in the first couple of weeks
in shadows and in black and white.
Thirty-seven
Q. One of my twin girls was giving us recognition smiles
by seven weeks and her sister just began giving us
large recognition smiles at three months; is there
something wrong about her development compared

to her sister who smiled earlier?
A. Every child is very different. Parents of multiples
sometimes believe their children should develop at
the same rate, and that is so much not the case. It is a
good thing for your baby to smile at you and interact.
Do not compare them too much because develop-
ment is personal and unique to our personalities.
Thirty-eight
Q. I was told by a friend of mine who is a mother of a
two-year-old to never attach a binky (pacifier) to my
baby’s clothes. Is she being very bossy or is there any
truth in what she is saying? She believed it could
choke the baby.
A. There is some truth to this; never attach any strings
close to your baby’s neck. Toddlers are quick and it
just takes a short period of time for them to entangle
themselves in ways you could never imagine. Be
careful always!
Thirty-nine
Q. I heard there are some plants a toddler should stay
away from and if digested can cause sickness. Can you
give me a list of them?
A. Yes, these plants can cause your little one or toddler to
become very ill. Contact your doctor or call 911 if they
ingest any of these potentially poisonous plants:
- Daffodil bulbs
- Hyacinths
- Elephants ears
- Mistletoe berries
- Poinsettia leaves
142 Dee Rule
- Castor-bean seeds
- Holly derris
- Rosary pea seeds
Forty
Q. My son began drooling around three months and is
now six months old and experiencing severe pain in
his gums. Is it better to use a gum numbing ointment
or to just give him teething rings?
A. Both will work out fine, but if your baby is so
disturbed, contact your pediatrician and ask if you
can use some type of pain killer to help ease the pain
at night. Also, you can massage his gums with a cool
cloth to help the discomfort.
Forty-one
Q. I have decided to stop breastfeeding. What is the best
route to achieve this?
A. You can ice your breasts periodically throughout the
day and breastfeed or pump less. Cabbage leaves can
be worn around the breasts because they can be cool
for a long period of time. Supplement one feeding
a day with a bottle, then move to two bottles per day
after one week, then three bottles and four, then five.
Good luck!
Forty-two
Q. My baby has developed cradle scalp, what can I do to
make it better?
A. Shampoo and brush your little one’s scalp every day
or so. Apply mineral oil or some baby oil at least twice
a day to loosen things up and heal scalp dryness.
Cradle scalp doesn’t last forever. It will be gone in a
blink. Ho baby, let this be gone!!

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THE BABY

Dee Rule Publishers, New York

No part of this book may be copied or reproduced, transformed

THE AMAZING DEE!

“Dee Rule arrived on the scene and immediately put me

“Dee Rule’s help in welcoming our triplets into this

“She entered our home when we were completely fraz-

“It is with great pride and enthusiasm that we write a

“Dee is one of the kindest, most wonderful people I have

Why Start Your Baby

If one feels the need of something grand, something infi-

I’ve mastered my art. For so many years, I’ve struggled and

“The best way to make children good is to make them

with all parents a way to go about their days according to their

“A book is a garden, an orchard, a storehouse, a party,

I asked myself the other day: who do you love? Without

those things they loved to do frequently before their babies

opinions sometimes can be stressful depending on the topic

Why the Majority of

The line between failure and success is so fine that we

homes. To be a servant was a joy. Living with and working for

I realized that there was something different about my

beginning of forming the self. They all have taught me about

the baby? What would I need to happen during the days to

writing a book that serves the purpose of a reference guide that

What Can a Baby Do

I just heard the announcer calling my flight to Los Angeles.

7:30 AM: I am on the plane. I just want to get a few words

I realize as a parent you become less judgmental of other

civilization will advance art, music, architecture, and all aspects

I woke up and sensed something was wrong. I picked the

call intuition, at least recognize that it is real. The existence

We don’t like their sound, and guitar music is on the way

They rule this universe and fill it with diversity, compassion,

your relationships with other people and yourself. Your over-

“Success is often provided by the exception to the rules

Dr. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi states in Creativity, “Most of

continues, “In most cases it is the parents who are responsible

pieces of his hair to make different brush sizes. I saw through

least once a day for some period of time. Why is it important

It is so fun to write this chapter because I saw an impor-

There are excellent leaders, which I define as people who

“Do something. If it works, do more of it. If it doesn’t, do

The Parental Persistence:

“Nothing in the world can take place of persistence. Talent

“Consider the postage stamp, my son. It secures success

The lifestyles of the parents matters. Having a baby should

Perhaps scheduling a routine for children and newborns

“Not all of your decisions will be correct. None of us is

The one most powerful expression of the way we live is

“We must learn to view change as a natural phenom-

Order helps us see freely and sometimes hinders us from

the park, or shopping. But be inflexible sometimes and have

FEEDING TIMES AND

When a baby comes home from the hospital, start feeding

Keeping the baby hydrated is very important and needs to

Rulers A, B, and C can be adjusted according to your

The Lifestyle Clocking Day

1. What time would you like your little one to go to