* In Miss Papaya's "Operator", I (Proginoskes) can't help but hear the second line of the song as "Please hook

me up to my ''author'' at the end of the line" instead of "hook me up with my ''lover''". This has some interesting metafictional implications whenever the song is used in an AMV or a songfic. * This Troper heard the "Song about Ping-Pong" By Operator Please, and couldn't remember the title. A friend insisted that it was called a "Song About People", which I later argued (passionately) was the title with basically my ''whole class'', until I saw the album and was proved wrong. It was... embarrassing to say the least. * This Troper once misheard a line from "Guilty", as sung by Jake Blues in the "Made in America" concert: "I got some cookies from my friends" (the actual line? "I got some cocaine, from my friends".) * I've had this issue with a number of System of a Down songs, but especially with B.Y.O.B. I always wondered what the line "Still there's bleeding eyes from the cablecar" meant. (Actual lyrics: Still they feed us lies from the tablecloth".) * When I first heard the song "Dancing with the Moonlit Night" of {{Genesis}}, these lyrics: "Can you tell me where my country lies?, Said the unifaun to his true love's eyes" Sounded to me like: "Can you tell me when my country lies? Said the uniform to his true love size." * Mishearing "Strike with serious vengeance" as "Strike with serious finjitsu" in [[CrackPairing Busta Rhymes and Ozzy Osbourne's]] song "This Means War" led to creation of the Finjitsu Fish - a fish wearing a ''gi''. * This troper used to think that the "Ain't nothing but a heartache" line from the BackstreetBoys song I Want It That Way was "Ain't nothing but a party." * When this troper heard "Through the Fire and Flames" by Dragonforce for the first time, he thought the first lyrics were "Imma go into morning, in the time before the light, in flames I dance eternally, we ride to watch the fight." This troper is angry that these lyrics were submitted to amiright.com ''three times'' and were never put on the site. * This troper thought for the longest time that "Give me all the peace" from {{Music/Muse}}'s "Bliss" was "Give me all the bliss", considering it's the name of the song. There's also "Stretch it like it's a butt squeeze" from New Born, which is actually "birth squeeze". * This Troper heard the line "You could travel the world" in Katy Perry's "California Gurls" as "You could travel by whale" for the longest time. It was... odd. * A favorite I believe I remember finding on kissthisguy.com was interesting because the listener didn't mishear the words themselves, they just misinterpreted a pause in a line in such a way that it completely changed the meaning: The song "Charlie Brown" by The Coasters has the lyric "Who calls the English teacher 'Daddy-o'?", which the submitter heard as "Who calls The English 'teacher daddyo?'". As if "Teacher Daddy-o" was some sort of slur referring to English people. * I am relieved to find I am not the only one who hears Knuckles' attack combination from ''{{Sonic Heroes}}'' as "SHIT!! HAAH!! YEAAHHH!!""

** Or "[[ThisIsSPARTA SHIT!!! ON A ROCK!!! YEAAAAH!!]]", as [[Tropers/KatanaCat I]]'ve heard it. I also once heard the announcer in ''SonicRiders'' say 'potato' instead of 'wind' because the volume was turned down ''really'' low. * I used to think that in the Oompa-Loompa song for Augustus Gloop from WillyWonkaAndTheChocolateFactory, they were saying "If you're not breathing, you will go far" instead of "If you're not GREEDY." I later realized that the fact that Augustus had just been drowning in the chocolate river probably had something to do with me misinterpreting that line. On a less morbid note, I also thought "Pampered and spoiled like a Siamese cat" from Veruca's song was "And purrs and squawks like a Siamese cat." * For a very long time as a child, I was convinced the Feed the Birds song from Mary Poppins was saying "Feed the birds, tuppence of egg." Having some vague idea that "tuppence" was a form of currency, this was exceptionally confusing. The proper line of "Feed the birds, tuppence a bag" makes much more sense. ** From the same song: In one of the verses, [[Tropers/ZiggyStardustForever I could]] have sworn I heard, "Snakes And Oppossums" rather than, "Saints And Apostles". Silly me... * Olivia's song Skip to a Little # opens with a rap by Jeffrey Lufkin which includes the line "''kouhai'' bow to your ''senpai'', on your knees"; before reading the correct lyrics, this troper was pretty shocked by this song, due to having misheard "bow" as... a significantly more explicit act that could also be performed while on one's knees. * Leaves' Eyes' song ''Norwegian Lovesong'' has a partially incomprehensible chorus for this troper. "Between the blue bears sits a girl with long braids, a boo-eyed angel with strawberry jeans, the smell was bunny, I was living a dream, Norwegian homeland, my heart belongs to you..." * This troper hears the line in the Black Eyed Peas song "Where Is The Love" "People livin' like they ain't got no mamas" as "People livin' like they ain't got no ''llamas''." * With English voices turned on, [[BlazBlue Jin Kisaragi's]] "Touga Hyoujin" Distortion Drive is awfully prone to making him scream "Here's Miami!". Obviously he wants to send his opponents to Miami in hopes that {{Dexter}} will kill them. * Having first heard {{Green Day}}'s "Holiday" as background music in one of the [[TonyHawksProSkater Tony Hawk]] games, this troper originally heard the line "A plastic bag on an onion ring." midway through the song. ** So that you know, the real lyric is "A plastic bag on a monument". ** This troper misheard a ''spoken'' line from this song, "The Representative from California has the floor", as "The representative from California House of Lords". I thought "What kind of anti-utopia is that?!" Of course, CodeGeass hadn't been made yet... * To me, the growling in {{Epica))'s song Beyond Belief always sounded like "Stronger... there be... LOBSTERS !" (Instead of "Restore all that belong to us". * [[@/KatanaCat I]] was listening to Utada Hikaru's song ''Beautiful World'', and, expecting most of the song to be in Japanese, got

Japanese Mondegreens instead of English ones. At one point in the song, I interpreted "bakka" as "baka" (the latter of the two meaning "stupid" or "idiot"). They're pronounced exactly the same. Just a couple of minutes before typing this, I saw [[http://www.animelyrics.com/jpop/utada/beautifulworl.htm the real lyrics]]. Mentioning that the idea that two words in a language would be pronounced the same but spelled differently and have a very different meaning hadn't even crossed my mind, my mom said something I can't quite remember that used the words "their" and "they're" a lot. Needless to say, I ''felt'' like a "baka". * {{Tropers/SonicGTR}}: I was listening to ThemCrookedVultures in [[TheAllegedCar my alleged car.]] One of the speakers is broken and the [=LCD=] display on the radio doesn't work anymore so I can't fix the bass, treble, ect. Then I heard this: " Were the same, my dead end friend[[strike:s and I]][[{{Touhou}} , Sanae]]." The only reason I want to listen to that song without hearing that every time is if anybody in Touhou is a dead end friend, it's [[PerpetualPoverty Reimu]] or [[{{Hikikomori}} Kaguya]]. * Here, [[Tropers/ZiggyStardustForever I have]] a couple of gems concerning my younger sister: ** One night, while driving around looking for a place to eat, when my parents suggested a buffet restaurant called Mother Tucker's, prompting said sister to pipe up and say, "Yeah, let's go to Hucker Bucker's!". How she managed to mishear it as ''that'', I'll never know. Oh well, could've been [[IfYouKnowWhatIMean worse]]... ** While shopping around for a new house, my parents eventually settled on another bungalow rather than a two-storey (bummer, I've always wanted a two-storey). All of a sudden, the same sister spoke up with, "I don't wanna move into a '''buffalo''' house!". She still hasn't managed to [[NeverLiveItDown live that one down]]... * This troper's family is Italian. One day my father came home from work and my mother asked him, "How did your day go?" He spun around and said, "What did you call me?" * When I was little (and even now I can't remember the real lyrics.) I thought the Spider-man theme went like this: "Spider-man, Spider-man can do anything a spider can. First he shoots then he climbs radioactive spider vines". * So, at advent, we had prayers we sung every night, including one I can't remember that had the line "Come quickly lord/ thy church doth wait". I was fairly convinced this line was, "Thy church duck waits", and spent a month or so pondering what that might be. The same song also had bits about squirrels (quarrels) ceasing, and mourning in Only Eggs's Isle (lonely exile). * Having gotten the Scott Pilgrim soundtrack I listened to the song 'Scott Pilgrim' where the name was taken from. Bryan Lee O'Malley, the original author, was inspired in some part by this song originally, so I misheard: "I've liked you for a thousand years" as "I'll fight you for a thousand years". I'm slightly suspicious he had a similar misunderstanding on hearing them * I always heard "All the Single Ladies" as "I'm a single ace". I've heard about twenty other variations, though. * From Lady Gaga's "Bad Romance": "Want you in my rear window" always

seemed to turn into "While you admire a window." * The first time she heard "That's Not My Name", Tropers/SunnyV thought The Ting Tings were saying "They call me sexy" instead of "They call me Stacy." She also heard "You follow the earth (?)" instead of "Euphoria" in "Must Be Dreaming" by FrouFrou. * In the Black Eyed Peas song 'Imma Be' I have heard 'Imma be a fly and shit' instead of 'Imma be the flyest chick'. Still, I hate this song so much I like this more than the real lyrics. ** Also, in Rihanna's Umbrella, I have heard [[{{CompletelyMissingThePoint}} 'Under my own Gorilla' instead of 'Under my Umbrella'.]] * New Radicals' "You Get What You Give" is one of this troper's favorite songs ever, but I always heard one of the lines as "we smash a mercy and then", which made absolutely no sense, even in context. And then I was listening to it the other day and suddenly realised it's "we smash a Mercedes Benz". I blame the AccentUponTheWrongSyllable. ** This (same) troper just remembered I used to think The Wallflowers' "One Headlight" had the line "What smells of cheap Hawaiian cigarettes" ("What smells of cheap wine and cigarettes") * I was listening to the radio years ago when people were encouraged to call in and tell about lyrics they had misheard. One guy thought that in [[ThePolice The Police's]] "Message In A Bottle", Sting sang "A year has passed since I broke my nose." Another thought that a line in the SkidRow song "18 And Life" went "Lived 9 to 5 and worked his big ass to the bone." The correct lyrics are "...since I wrote my note" and "...worked his fingers to the bone" respectively. * I'm still not sure what the real line in Fair to Midland's "Kyla Cries Cologne" ''is,'' but I'm sure it's not what I hear it as: "The hat monster any world.") * No matter how many times I repeat the title to myself, I still hear the chorus of Metallica's "The Sruggle Within" as "The Struggle With Your Hair". * For quite a long time after it was released, this troper heard the last bit of 'hanging brigets(?) around your neck, babe' from No More by Ruff Endz as '...to wring your neck, babe'. I was actually relieved when I found out the right words, since the Mondegreen version scared me a little bit. * I used to hear the chorus of {{Soundgarden}}'s "The Day I Tried to Live" as "One more time around/Am I naked?" when the actual lyrics are "One more time around/I might make it". * In [[DeathNote Zetsubou Billy]] This troper swears he hears this... --> '''CARAMEL!!''' We like '''CARAMEL!!''' I need '''CARAMEL!!''' You have any '''CARAMEL!!''' [[TheSimpsons (annoyed grunt)]]. * This Troper managed to turn the line "Despite all my rage I'm still just a rat in a cage" from [[SmashingPumpkins Bullet With Butterfly Wings]] into "The smile on my rain, I still am a ram in pain." Considering I know all the words to Smells Like Teen Spirit, I wonder just how it happened. * This Troper at first understood the [[GratuitousEnglish English]] line in the SuzumiyaHaruhi ImageSong "Punkish Regular" "Should be to be dance" as "Shoobie doobie dance". And she still sings it that way,

because the original line doesn't make any damn ''sense'', and "shoobie doobie" is one of those legitimate arrangements of nonsense syllables that fits with dancing. * This troper recently found an audio cassette tape of myself singing a few Garth Brooks songs when I was 12 years old. Some of the more...intresting mondegreens I heard my 11-years younger self sing: From "Friends In Low Places": "I'll be as high as that ivory tower, but you'll never know!" (the lyric is actually "I'll be as high as that ivory tower that you're living in"); from "The River": "But with the Good Lord as my captain, I can make it through the mall" ("But with the Good Lord as my captain, I can make it through them all"); from "That Summer" (don't even ask me what I was doing singing that song when I was only 12, the meaning went WAY over my head): "In a dress that I was certain she had been mourning quite awhile" ("In a dress that I was certain she hadn't worn in quite awhile"). However, the two most distrubing ones were in "Much Too Young": "A worn-out tape of Chris LeDoux, lonely women with bad boobs seem to be the only friends I've left at all" ("A worn-out tape of Chris LeDoux, lonely women, and bad booze seem to be the only friends I've left at all"); and in "Two Pina Coladas": "She said goodbye to her good time in bed"!!!!!! ("She said goodbye to her good-timing man"). I've been considering burning this tape the last few days... * No matter how many times this troper hears "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey, she never hears the singer actually say "She took a midnight train" in the first verse. It just sounds like the singer says "He" twice. * [[{{Tropers/RAMChYLD}} This troper]] has a few: ** Upbeat: *** "I'm a racing car that survives, like ''Lady {{MacGyver}}''" ("I'm a racing car ''passing by'' like ''Lady Godiva''") and "Like an ''[[{{Transformers}} Autobot]]'', you gotta whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa explode!" ("Like an ''atom bomb, about to Oh oh oh oh oh'' explode") in Queen's "Don't Stop Me Now" (due his choice to shoehorn a cheapo MP3 player with built in punitive speaker to a VTech toy microphone/amplifier). *** On a more classic note, ''It's raining melons!'' (''It's raining men!'') *** ''Waka Laka is a magical Nintendo/Music full of wonder, fantasy!'' *** ''One, Tanah Merah/Gorilla One Tanah Merah''(no offense intended to anyone actually living in said address). *** ''Raise a pledge now, numa numa yay!'', ''Dragon study day'' and ''Nah, Mint test, they all kick tie, yay!'', among others (random words: tri-duke, cheat-arrow, sambal beet, don't serenade Nick) *** ''Cooshies up, Cooshies up, Cooshies up, Cooshies in my head/Cooshies up, Cooshies up, Cooshies up, Cooshies might be dead'' (the chorus of ''Lump'' by ''The Presidents Of The United States of America'') *** Heard in the Berrykins' song in the StrawberryShortcake: Sky's The Limit movie: "''Do we have a very nice butt?''" - which this troper promptly replied "'''PFFT Hell No!'''" ** Depressive *** ''I could never be the one'' (''I could never be your woman'' -

''Your Woman'' - ''White Town'', which he was calls the "Imperial March rip song" due to part of the sample sounding like it was ripped from said score, sped up and pitch changed). *** ''They baked paradise and put out a f**king lie'' (to be fair, he was in emo mode when he first heard the song) *** ''I'm blue, I will beat up a dolly...'' ** Embarassing Street Fighter stupidity from when he was 10: *** Ryu and Ken's attacks are called boogen(hadouken), Ahboogen(shoryuken) and a-tat-tat-tat-boogen(Tatsumaki Senpuu Kyaku) *** Guile's one attack is called Sabek-coo or "sabit ku!" (sonic boom) *** Dhalsim's attacks are Booka-fire(yoga-fire) and Booka-flame(yogaflame) *** And of course, Sagat's TIGER ROBOCOP! ** Mortal Kombat 4 for the GBC: Maybe it's the shitty audio compression (what were you expecting from a GameBoyColor!!!), but one of Raiden's named attack sounded like [[ImAHumanitarian ''I want you in my barbecue!'']] ** And he used to hear what he thought those japanese coin-operated rides say "Han-ya!" and "Bai-bai! Kudasai!". Took him a few years to realize that it was actually saying ''Konnichiwa'' and ''Bai-bai! Matta ne!'' respectively. ** He thought he heard the phrase "Fuck-All!" in the GBA version of TheSims. It has become his favorite phrase to use when he's depressed. ** Has also mondegreened whole songs on purpose, two were made into animutations that have since been pulled due to Avex Trax's stupidity, and the rest as files on a USB hard drive somewhere. * Until I saw the lyrics, I'd always thought that the last line of Be Prepared from TheLionKing was "And the meat of the victims is rare Be prepared!" Which makes sense, coming from a bunch of hyenas, but is HighOctaneNightmareFuel. ** In the same song, I used to think "decades of denial" was "the cage of denial". And in fact didn't find out what it really was until I read an example from the AcCENTUponTheWrongSylLABle page just now. * I had a Disney one as well. All these years I thought, rather then "Darkwing owns the night", a line from the DarkwingDuck theme was "A duckling of the night". Incidentally I still like my version better. * A double generational one in this case. My Grandma told a funny story of how my mother always used to think that the line in Silent Night was "Round young virgins" rather then "yon virgins." My response was "Wait, you mean it isn't?" * For the longest time, in [[TheWizardOfOz]], I always thought that when the wizard tells them to "come forward", that the Cowardly Lion was saying "Tell me what it's all about". It was only some time back that I realized that he was actually saying "Tell me when it's over". * Also, I had recently watched TheMuppetsTakeManhattan on The Hub (formerly Discovery Kids). I had the cloded-captioning on, and even though I had watched the movie countless times, I always thought Pete was saying "is grits, grits, how many grits?" followed by Rizzo just being defiant. It turns out however, that Pete was actually saying "Hominy Grits" (I had personally never heard of Hominy Grits myself), followed Rizzo making fun of him by saying "how should I know how many, count them yourself!"; in other words, he was being a wiseguy. I

never actually knew this until then. ** There's actually an old joke this troper read once when I was a kid, regarding the word "hominy": -->Man in restaurant: "I'll have the grits." -->Waitress: "Hominy, sir?" -->Man: "Five or six." *** Funnily enough, I remembered it when I was making myself a bowl of hominy grits the other day. (I want to say it's kind of like Cream of Wheat in texture with slightly larger grains.) * "Strawberry Fields Forever": the infamous "cranberry sauce" line? This Troper didn't hear it as that ''or'' "I buried Paul". Instead it was "Waaaalk verrrry sloooow." * I always heard the line "We are young, we are free" from "Alright" by Supergrass as "We are young, we are green". I also heard "Be alright" instead of "Feel alright", and "Do we like you? Are your friends sure?" instead of "Are we like you? I can't be sure". * Subverted with Queen's "One Vision" in this troper's case. I did hear the last two words in the song as "fried chicken" - but I was like, "No, that can't be right". So I tried my best to hear the last two words as "one vision" - until I found out that the last two words were, in fact, "fried chicken". ** Similarly, I had a friend who heard "fried chicken" but insisted the last line had to be "just give me my vision". * [[Tropers/{{Acebrock}} This troper]] always assumed that the line "A Vegetable" from {{Supertramp}}'s The Logical Song was actually "Impressionable." It helps that the word imressionable, when it comes to people has a negative connotation for me. Also, Edge of seventeen (it plays on the station I listen to) had only three lines this I could even pretend to understand: -->Sings a song -->Sounds Like She's singing -->Ooo baby ooo baby ooo * In RepoTheGeneticOpera, specifically, in the song Infected, I managed to hear the Narmy "It's a butt condition-Damn this butt condition!" * [[Tropers/{{Fourteenwings}} This troper]] knew something was wrong when he put in the first Season 2 HaruhiSuzumiya disc into his DVD player and heard "''Super Diver [[KingdomHearts Namine!]] [[LesYay I'm in love with the]] [[SailorMoon Outer Senshi!]]''" * In Cheap Trick's [[CoveredUp version of The Move's]] "California Man", I kept hearing a line as "Dance right on 'til your bones are breakin'". Turns out it's actually "Dance right on 'til ''the floors'' are breakin'". I kind of like my version better. * One from this Italian troper: every time Phil Collins sang "Think about it" in his song ''Another Day in Paradise'', he kept hearing "[[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pippo_Baudo Pippo Baudo]]" (OK, maybe for you it has no meaning, but ol' Pippo here in Italy is almost an institution). He's not even the only one: a parody of the dance song "Think About the Way" with lyrics rewritten in Italian was actually called "Pippo Baudo U". * Until she was in ''high school,'' this troper's best friend used to think that, in TheLittleMermaid, Ursula was singing "They think a girl

who gossips is a ''whore''", rather than "bore." * ''"I'll wear your skin as a shit"'' completely ruins the fucked-up nature of [[FromFirsttoLast FFTL's]] song ''Ride the Wings of Pestilence.'' It's "I'll wear your skin as a suit" by the way. It makes sense when you hear his voice--he was only 16. ** Is Patrick Stump saying "the ''salad'' days are over"? (Turns out it was "the ''silent'' days are over". Whatever that means.) * Two cases of CountryMatters, one in the second verse of "Rock Me Amadeus" by Falco and one in the chorus of "Lovefool" by the Cardigans. The latter has been {{B Roll Rebus}}ed on {{YTMND}}: [[http://lovefool.ytmnd.com/ lovefool.ytmnd.com]] * Not from a song, but for years I thought when you were an expert on something you could say "[subject] is my great". Why? Because in ''MontyPythonAndTheHolyGrail'' I ''thought'' the soldier at the beginning says "Are you suggesting coconuts '''my great'''?" I was a teenager when I watched it again and realized he was saying "Are you suggesting coconuts '''migrate'''?" * I've listened a lot to the J-Rock band {{403 Forbiddena}}(also knows as just "{{403}}"). Some of their songs are in English, although most of it is badly pronounced and/or [[GratuitousEnglish Engrish]]. This makes some of the lines pretty much impossible to understand unless you read the lyrics, and I've heard things like: ** "I believe in pasteurized milk"("But I have an eagerness for life still")(Northern Lights) ** "You're so high, and I need to display it"("If so, how I went into this life?")(Northern Lights) ** "I'll be with the old man Chris" ("And it robs me of memories") (Northern Lights) ** "You invite me with this invitation" ("Even my belief is imitation") (Blaze of Life) ** "Oh Ivan, you punched hundreds of times, oh Ivan, you bitch-slapped me thousands of times" ("Oh, even if ratted hundreds of times, oh, even if penetrated thousands of times") (Blaze of Life) * The Korean MMO game ''Dragon Nest'' has the Mercenary and her HOLY SHIT SWING (Punishing Swing), as (mis)heard [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2DXVPvGZKXw HERE]]. * This troper just found out that the lyrics in It's Raining Men are "God bless Mother Nature/She's a single woman too" instead of "God bless Mother Nature/Should have sent some women too." [[BiTheWay She likes her version better.]] * This troper always misheard the line "inflicting wounds with a cross-turned dagger" in Death's Crystal Mountain as "inflicting wounds with a costumed nigger." * When [[Tropers/{{Chagen46}} I]] first heard [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lBK4pMivaQU 5OUL ON D!SPLAY]], the theme song to GranTurismo 5, I assumed that the lyric "Life is too precious to waste" was "Love is so precious in ways". It fits so well that I assume that the singer wanted it to be interpreted either way. * For the longest time, when I was a kid, I used to mishear "rated R" as "radar" at the end of movie ads. So for a while, I used to wonder how many of these ''Radar'' movies they were going to make and what theater I could see it at.

* In the Russian dub of DudleyDoRight, it's pretty possible to mishear [[DastardlyWhiplash ''Snidley Whiplash'']] as ''Snidley Winglish'' or ''Snidley V-English''. * [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_s0jcV3UDAw Emo emo emo, emo emo!]] [[hottip:*:Repeated in Silver Forest's ''[[{{Touhou}} Minorin]] Fantasia''. The actual lyrics (and [[WikiMagic eventually]] a translation) can be found [[http://en.touhouwiki.net/wiki/Lyrics:_%E3%81%BF%E3%81%AE%E3%82%8A%E3 %82%93%E3%81%B5%E3%81%81%E3%82%93%E3%81%9F%E3%81%98%E3%81%82 here]].]] * This is actually a fairly common one from Disney's Disney/{{Aladdin}}. In Jafar's reprise of Prince Ali, his bizarre enunciation causes quite a few people, this troper included, to hear "His assets frozen" as "His ass is frozen" and thereby think Disney is GettingCrapPastTheRadar. (It's Aladdin. They ''are''. Just...not that time.) * Up until a few days ago, I always thought that the chorus in {{ptitlewiz5pz1p}} "Paradise City" said "Take me down to the ''very last'' city", even though it really says "Take me down to the ''Paradise'' city. I'm kind of surprised that I didn't notice this earlier, given the whole TitleDrop thing. * ''Wait and Bleed'' by Slipknot for this troper. To me, "Inside my shell I wait and bleed" sounded like, "Inside Michelle I wait and bleed". Made me think that the song was about the lead singer's... er... interesting relationship with a girl, presumably named Michelle. * I used to think the first line of TheyMightBeGiants' "Hearing Aid" was "Frosty the supermiser lives by himself" - It's actually "Frosty the ''supervisor''". A reference to a miser would kind of make sense in context of the song too, and "supermiser" just somehow always sounded like a term that ''would'' be likely to be coined in a TMBG song. * This troper could've sworn the lyrics of {{tAtU}}'s "all about us" contained "[[GirlOnGirlIsHot touch pussy]]" somewhere, when he heard it. Admit it, it would fit. But no, only half right. * SmashingPumpkins' "Cherub Rock" - I initially thought I heard "hamsters unite", which of course turned out to be "''hipsters'' unite". The idea of hamsters uniting is kind of adorable though. * [[Tropers/{{Yomegami}} This troper]] has quite a few mondegreens while playing StarCraft, most of them coming from Protoss units. For example, the following three quotes are from the High Templar: ** "I s**t alcohol." (Actually "I heed thy call.") ** "Esteemed I'm being." (Actually "State thy bidding." Although my quote does make some sense knowing the High Templar's backstory) ** "S**tc**k." (Actually "Zzz'togh." Apparently High Templar are potty mouths to me.) ** Then the Dragoons have some: "I am niggit," (Actually "I am needed?") and "For [[KingdomHeartsBirthBySleep Ventus]]." (Actually "For vengeance.") Finally, I also hear the Hydralisk's death screech as "WHAT?!" * I was watching ''Breakin''', and I initially thought the song one of the dance sequences was set to had something to do with "ninety-nine and a half balloons" - other than being half a balloon more than Nena's signature hit, it made no sense (after all how could you even

have half of a balloon, anyway?). I eventually figured out it was "ninety-nine and a half won't do". * Listening to the original French 'La Vie en Rose', even with the limited knowledge of French this Troper has, I always want to hear 'Et ca me fait quelque chose' as 'And something quelque chose'. Which, knowing a little French, is kind of hilarious. * This troper's sister, back when we were kids, thought the gospel standard "Just a Closer Walk with Thee" was "Just a Postcard of Pralines", possibly due to road trip stops at Stuckey's pecan shops. * This troper misheard "Just a dead man walking with a double barreled shotgun" from the Five Finger Death Punch song "Dying Breed" as "Just a dead man walking with a Taco Bell shotgun" and subsequently wondered what the heck a Taco Bell shotgun was. Is it like a hot dog gun, only with burritos from Taco Bell? * This troper always heard "Might as well jump", in VanHalen's "Jump", as "Maxwell, jump!", and always wondered, "Who the hell is Maxwell?". ** He also hears in {{Disturbed}}'s "Stricken", "Makin' me breakfast" instead of "Leaving me breathless", and also, instead of "Into the abyss will I run", "And today, hey, BruceLee and [[YourMom my mum]]"... * According to some Youtube comments, people keep hearing "Jupiter, run for your life" in PhilCollins' "Don't Lose My Number" (actually "You better run for your life"). * Not a song or something I know what mean, but it's too hilarious not to write, and I couldn't find another place for it. Anyway, when on vacation in France, we were staying at a hotel, and my brother heard someone passing by, saying what sounded like:(in Norwegian) "Hey, *name*, what time is it in Afghanistan?" * For decades this troper thought it was "Electric You". It's "Electric Youth". Bonus points for it being the goddamn '''title.''' * The song "Everywhere I Go" by Hollywood Undead starts as follows: "Everywhere I go, b****es always know, Charlie Scene has got a weenie that he loves to show." This troper heard Charlie SHEEN, which makes about as much sense. * I was watching Film/PeepingTom and I thought I heard a character mention sending an email, which would be pretty unusual for a film made in 1960. He repeated the same word a sentence later, and I realized it was actually "memo" - the British pronounciation of that word apparently rhymes with "emo". * [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ty9BneMpISo&t=46s Ready Now]] by [[{{DJMAX}} Ruby Tuesday]]: --> '''I heard it as:''' "Every time I see you smile, [[{{Vocaloid}} Len]]" \\ '''What it actually is:''' "Every time I see you smile and..." ** Another one occurs later in the song: ---> '''I heard it as:''' "I'm not the boss anymore, baby give me more" \\ '''What it actually is:''' "[[IntercourseWithYou I'm on the floor, saying 'More! Baby give me more!']]" * There's a line in "Feel Good Inc" by {{Gorillaz}} that goes "You've got a new horizon, it's ephemeral style," but this troper always hears it as "You've got a new horizon in the

[[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Federal_architecture Federal style]]," probably the result of watching ''{{Antiques Roadshow}}'' one time too many. ** Wait, that's not what they're saying? *** The line is in fact "It's ephemeral style". * TheWho's ''{{Tommy}}'' has been ruined for me (sort of) by one YouTube commenter. Why? On [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YPmijD6jqHs a video for "Christmas",]] he or she left the following comment: --->Did you ever see the faces of the children naked. --->so excited --->O_O ** '''''CANNOT UNHEAR!''''' * This troper does this all the time when he hears a song and tries to sing it without lyrics. However, the two he has to relate are not his own: ** Tale the first: one time, his browser came up with a misheard lyric for Bohemian Rhapsody: "Spare him his life from this monstrosity" was misheard as "Spare him his life from his pork sausages" by someone. ** Tale the second: his dad constantly (probably as a [[DudeNotFunny "joke"]]) sings "So long, toodlepip, farewell" instead of the correct "So long, farediwell, pip pip, cheerio". It gets very annoying. * When listening to Chris Brown's song "Yeah 3x", this troper always heard: "You like to drink, so do we/ Get more batters, bring them to me". The line is "....Get more ''bottles'', bring them to me". * [[@/{{Pastylover2}} This troper]] heard "a mechanic who laughs at a funeral" during [[BarenakedLadies One Week]]. * This tropersings "and shout: [[GratuitousSpanish SIRVEM!]]" on [[EltonJohn Saturday's Night Alright For Fighting]]. It means "pour me!", which strangely fits with the song (it's about a pub and the constant fights that happened there). * In "Hold It Against Me," I thought Britney Spears was saying "weren't your buddy" instead of "want your body." * The fans of MarvelVsCapcom3 hear a ''lot'' of these. ** "Anime power up time!" for Deadpool's X-Factor is also commonly misheard as "Anime powerup [[PrecisionFStrike shit]]!". *** Ironically, he actually said that in an earlier build of the game. ** "FEAR FLAME!" for Doctor Doom's "Sphere Flame" and "PHOTON ERASE!" for his "Photon Array". *** His Photon Array is also heard as "HOME ON THE RANGE!" **** This troper even heard it as "POPE ON A RING!" ** And "BLAST PUPPY" for his Plasma Beam. *** Or "ASTHMA BEAM!" ** There's also "Hard Kick" which sounds like "HARD DICK!" ** "Photon Shot" even sounds like "PHOTON COCK!" ** Really, Dr. Doom is the Mr. Mondegreen of MarvelVsCapcom3. ** Hulk says, "Gamma--Break you!" if you follow up his Gamma Charge with another Gamma Charge. Some fans have misheard this as "Dammnit, rape you!". ** Super Skrull's Skrull Torch hyper combo. He says, "Burn, ignorant creature!" Sounds a lot more like "Burn, niggery creature!" ** "MIGHTY FUCK!" for Thor's Mighty Spark.

*** "MIGHTY LAYER CAKE!" for his Mighty Hurricane. *** "Buy Odin's beer!" for "By Odin's beard!" in his Mighty Tornado super. Also misheard as "Buy [[OdinSphere Odin Sphere]]!" ** Some fans misheard Chris' "Suck on this!" (when he throws a grenade) as "Suck my dick!" *** Also when he fires his revolver, sounds like he says "[[{{ptitlei015gc004kw4}} DIGLETT!]]" (He's actually saying "Eat lead!") *** In one of Chris' intro dialogues it sounds like he's saying "gimme a shit rag," although he's just saying "gimme a sit-rep." (Situation report) ** Hsien-Ko's Chireitou sounds much like "Here I go!" ** Some people have heard Morrigan's quote before using the Finishing Shower hyper as "F*cking dodge this!" ** Many fans hear Viewtiful Joe's "Six Machine!" as "Dick Machine!" *** Also in his Mach Speed hyper, he sounds like he shouts "Watch meeeeeeeeeeeee!" *** A lot of Joe's attacks come out erotically. Aside from "Dick Machine," there's "Sex Cannon" (Six Cannon), "Red Hot Dick" (Red Hot Kick), "Cock Speed" (Mach Speed), etc. What's interesting is that these all work in Japanese too. **** A Japanese-only mondegreen for Joe is found in his Groovy Uppercut H variation. "Upper! Oh, Mike and Ike!" ** Zero's Level 3 ''isn't'' named Shoryudan Reppujin (lit. "Rising Dragon's Finishing Gale Blade"). He's ''actually'' shouting "Ittouryoudan! Genmu Zero!". [[GratuitousJapanese When translatated from Japanese]], it's something along the lines of "Cut into two with one stroke! Illusion Zero!" This is also a BilingualBonus, as the move ''should'' be called Genmurei ([[ThatOneAttack remember]] [[spoiler:''Mega Man X5'']]?); rei is Japanese for... wait for it... zero. *** ''Or'', it ''could'' instead be "Rekkyoudan!" In ''X8'', Zero received an ability for his Z-Saber from Earthrock Trilobyte called Rekkyoudan. It turned his Z-Saber a yellowish-orange color (much like his Level 3) and allowed Zero to deflect projectiles (again, much like his Level 3). *** Fans have misheard his "Hadangeki!" as either "Zangeki!" or "Rangeki!" Cue [[{{Bleach}} Zangetsu]] jokes in regards to the former. *** One of his combos has been heard as: "Burn... Dave And Buster's!" *** His "Ryuenjin!" sounds like "Too easy!" ** Spencer says "In your face!" whenever he strikes the enemy after he reeled them with his bionic arm. It sounds more like "Finger face!" ** M.O.D.O.K's Analyze Cube sounds like "Candlelight Cube". *** Or "Anal-ize Cube!" *** Or (albeit less prominently) "Add an ice cube!" ** Shuma-Gorath's "Mystic" in the names of his attacks sounds more like "Beefsteak". ** Taskmaster's "Secret noob! I can see through that! Sort-of-Black Knight!" for his guard-hyper. *** Tasky's "Aim of Hawkeye" also sort of sounds like "End Apartheid!" *** Or, "Aim of heart guy!" *** Or even "Aim of [[{{Popeye}} Popeye]]!"

** In her Japanese audio, when C. Viper does her normal grab attack, what she says sounds like "Fuck me!" ** While no one has come up with a definitive version of what Wesker says at the beginning of his Phantom Dance hyper, this troper always hears it as "Mortals are soup..." ** The word "fatal" in this game just comes out wrong. Super Skrull's "ANAL BUSTER!!" and Wolverine's "ANAL CLAW!" for instance. * For a while I was convinced [[TheClash "(White Man In) Hammersmith Palais"]] included the line "but it was fucked up some nights". It's actually "But it was [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four_Tops Four Tops]] all night". I realized my mistake when I heard it on the radio without any censorship and figured either a DJ somewhere got some crap past the radar, or, more likely, it was time to finally look up those lyrics. * Mondegreens can be persistant. Every time ''The Squonk'' starts playing, I still hear "one more revelation" even though I know it's "Like father like son". (And the hunter says "Here I am, I'm very fierce and frightening" not "Here I am, from a very distant nightmare"...) * My mishearing of the first verse of ''Holding Out for a Hero'' is less interesting than how I found out. Possibly because I'm an agnostic I heard "Where are all the gods?" as "Where are all the guards?", and a subconscious attempt to make it rhyme turned the last line into something about the tiger's eye and heart. I realized something was wrong when I saw a sketch of Leona from TheSuburbanJungle singing it. The thing is, Leona hates tigers... * The first time I heard Lisa Hannigan's "I Don't Know", I thought the first verse ended with the line "if you want to, I am gay". When the line got repeated I figured out it was actually "I am ''game''", which makes much more sense in the context of the song. * This new troper has some really interesting mondegreens from SSBB. I always mishear part of the Mona Pizza's Song (English) as "Mona Pizza's got nothing on us, 'cause we've got six-packs for once!" And in the Japanese version, one line sounds suspiciously like "Hold Sega on the loofah." Another one in Ashley's Song (Japanese): One part sounds like "movie YouTube" to me for some reason. * In "We Used To Wait" by The Arcade Fire, there's a line I always hear as "Like a pigeon on a table" - it's actually "Like a ''patient'' on a table". * Even though I know better, I can't help hearing the chorus of "Rhinoceros" by SmashingPumpkins as though Billy Corgan is singing about pants ("and chinos, and chinos, and chinos" instead of "and she knows...") * From Panic! at the Disco's "Camisado", I heard "This is the scent of quarantine wings in a hospital" as "This is the scent of chicken wings in a hospital" a few times. * This Troper's friend told her a story of the best Mondegreen she's ever heard. It involved the U2 song "Mysterious Ways"; someone apparently misheard the chorus as "Shamu the mysterious whale" (instead of "she moves in mysterious ways"). It still cracks her up. * A variation. [[KungFuPanda "My old enemy...stairs."]] --> "My old enemy stares."

* I misheard some of Funky Kong's quotes from MarioKartWii as "FUCK YEAH" and "FUCK YOU". Also, when Great Tiger from PunchOut Wii misses a hit, it sounds like he says "Fuck yeah."(he's really saying something in Hindi) Apparently, to me, video game characters are pretty foul-mouthed. * To this troper, "want your bad romance" becomes "want John Barroman". * It turns out that line in Blind Melon's "Galaxie" I used to think was "You're leavin' me, well a hey diddle deedley dee" is in fact "you're leaving me with a hated identity". Yes, Shannon Hoon kind of ''does'' stretch out the last syllable of "identity" that much. I'm glad that was in fact a mondegreen, because it would be kind of a dumb lyric. * [[SouthParkBiggerLongerAndUncut "It's a foreign film from Canada!"]] -> "It's a porn film from Canada!" * My cousin once told me not to listen to the song his older brother kept playing (When Two are One, by Atreyu), because one line was depressing. When we badgered it out of him, he told us it was, "Thanks for lying, have fun dying." His brother corrected him, "It's 'Things colliding, lovers dying." The lyric turned out to be "Fates colliding, love ''un''dying." And we all also misheard "Close our eyes, hope will never die" as "Close our eyes, hope we'll never die." (Just a bit less optimistic...) * [[TheSimpsons "Someone found my keys!"]] -> Someone found my cheese! * More SomethingSomethingLeonardBernstein than Mondegreen, but the broadcast stations in my area [[{{Understatement}} frequently]] air a commercial for a used car dealership in town. It mainly features a low-budget cop chase scene, ending with a song that I imagine is supposed to be TheJimmyHartVersion of "I Can't Drive 55". It goes something like this: -->Blahdee blahdee bledhee blah blah ''OH NO!!!'' Blipdee blahdee bloodee blah blah ''HIT THE DOH!!!'' Blahdee bloodhee bleedee blah blah blohdee bloodee blah blah blahdee blahdee ''SINCE NINETEEN FIFTY FIIIIIIIIIVE!!!!'' * Due to the odd inflection LilWayne puts on the words "lawn mower" in "A Milli", this Troper first [[{{Mondegreen}} Mondegreened]] as "Lorne Mauer." * This troper's mother heard "But heaven ain't close in a place like this" from "Somebody Told Me" by The Killers as "I never wear clothes in a place like this". This troper also has no idea what one line in "Remember The Name" by Fort Minor is: Lyrics websites say "People think it's a common owner's name", which makes no sense, and this troper thinks it's either "People often comment on his name" or "He often gets comments on his name", the former of which is more likely. There's a mondegreen somewhere in that. * This troper misheard the lyrics of... some German pop song, no idea what it was. The original was "Hebt die Hand hoch, wir stehn hinter euch" ("Raise your hand, we stand behind you") as "Hebt die Hand hoch, wischt den Hintern!", which translates as "Raise your hand, wipe your ass!" She also heard the line "Fate up against your will" from "Killing moon" as "Fate of the game still wild" or "Fate of the gangster Will", the latter of which gave her an idea: a story about

superheroes etc. where the characters and their traits are based on mondegreens. The leader, of course, is Lady Mondegreen. Others include the German duo Agathe Bauer ("I got the power!") and Anneliese Braun ("All the leaves are brown") and the gangster Will. * This troper always thought that AC/DC said "Dirty deeds! Dun-der tree!" Of course I had no idea what a Dunder tree was. * This troper's best friend once spectacularly misheared a line from the Headstones' Cemetary, changing "She's embalmed in love juice" to the even less sensical "She's the monkey love juice". * My little brother kept insisting that the last line of "One Week" was [[{{FlatWhat}} "Let's go watch TV and poop on a Ferrari."]] * This troper was surprised to go to the {{Oliver and Company}} page and find that the chorus of 'Why Should I Worry' is actually {{Gratuitous French}} as opposed to 'Street sidewalk fare.' (As in, 'I may not have money but I can walk the streets without care.') * One time I heard "Grandma's Got A Facebook" by YourFavoriteMartian, I heard "Watching soaps half the day" as "Watching SouthPark all day". ---I thought you said "go back to [[{{Mondegreen}} Monty Bean]]." ----

MoneyToThrowAway * This Troper had a friend in high school who would occasionally throw 5-10 one dollar bills on the table without warning to watch us scramble for them. [[HilarityEnsues Hilarity Ensued]]. * This Troper's mother grew up on the Main Line of Philadelphia (an area populated by affluent families) and remembers New Year's parties in which hundred-dollar bills were thrown from balconies. Troper, having been raised in a more middle-class area, didn't believe this when first told. * For years this troper seemed to have uncanny luck at finding dropped coins outside his school. It was only years later that I learned that it was a 'cool' display of affluence among one large group to throw away the change they got back from daily visits to our resident ice cream truck, by which time I'd half filled a magnum-sized bottle with my finds.

MonochromaticEyes * At this troper's high school there is a guy who has white colored contacts that make it appear he only has a pupil... it's actually quite creepy. ** I've seen quite a few contacts like that. This troper wants some to make one eye completely black and the other completely white, but they are usually impossible to see out of, unless they have a clear space for the pupils (Which would ruin the effect). I think they are called Scerla lenses, and are ment to cover the entire eye. *** Sclera lenses. And if you have a black pair and a white pair, you can switch them around with the white one fogged over and the black one with a small clear spot in the middle without too much ioof a

problem as long as you don't wear them for too long. ** One of this troper's best friends has something similar to that. His irises are so dark, they are indistinguishable from his pupils. * This Troper has dark brown irises that look almost pitch black from a distance (making his irises and pupils look like two big circles of black.) * This tropette's friend has contacts where the irises are blue and the pupils are star-shaped. She wore them to Algebra one day and everyone FLIPPED OUT.

MonochromeCasting

Monopoly * [[Tropers/{{Plumbum}} This Troper]] once managed to royally screw over the [[ArtificialStupidity AI]] on the mobile version of ''Here and Now: The World Edition'' by literally owning all of the properties on the board with hotels (note that I had house rules that basically threw money at the players, such as 20M at the start and 4M for passing GO, with double for landing on GO). * [[Tropers/{{Kitsunezeta}} kitsunezeta]] was playing Monopoly Streets on the Speed Dice rules. Apart from being dead last despite having the dark blue, [[CherryTapping brown]], and [[GameBreaker Orange]] groups, he still managed to hold on to some money to stay in the game. Then two of the three AI opponents got bankrupt... to the same 3rd AI opponent, and said opponent then had every monopoly on the board that kitsunezeta didn't have. Turns out, when you get stuck in jail, the speed die doesn't take effect on you. Also turned out that Park Place was a giant magnet for the remaining AI opponent. [[BeyondTheImpossible half of the board ended up getting mortgaged in 1 turn.]] No points for guessing who won. * Not entirely sure if this goes here, but This Troper's friends once brought a Monopoly set to school on finals review week. During math class, they set up the board and played three turns before our teacher noticed they were playing Monopoly. She tried TranquilFury, but it DIDN'T WORK. ("Does there have to be a RULE that you can't play MONOPOLY in class?" "...Yes") * In Monopoly Streets, it is not an uncommon sight to see me slowly build up a large stockpile of money, have hotels on all properties, and a few good trades ready when I suddenly hit 3 hotel properties back to back. Next round, every player will land on one of my mega hotel spots that have just been mortgaged. The game then proceeds to mock me as I will always land on "Go to Jail" and be given the information that it's for "Karmic Justice." [[HilarityEnsues Hilarity Ensues.]] * This troper once was involved in an 8-man game of Monopoly in the school library. One person wound up getting the "Pay 20 dollars to every person on the board" card. [[HilarityEnsues Hilarity ensued.]] * Our Monopoly box has a Post-It Note on it warning against playing the game because of the risk of [[RageQuit becoming sidetracked]] and

not using proper [[NoodleImplements game pieces]]. * [[Tropers/{{Twentington}} This troper]] always plays Monopoly against himself. Why not take the title literally? ----

MonsterRancher * {{Tropers/Lalalei2001}} just got an Aero (AKA Mint), a Pixie/Tiger, in ''Monster Rancher DS'', by saying "TheProtomen". Aeros/Mints are my favorite monsters ever! ^o^ ** In ''Monster Rancher 2'' I had a Mint that got all the way to A Rank! *** [[Tropers/ArleKaakun This troper]] also had a Mint, too! And she finished the half of the Major 4 that was not finished by the fly-away Phoenix, thusly winning the game and cuing the credits~ ** In ''Monster Rancher Battle Card Episode 2'', I had the habit of not changing my monsters at all. So I kept the Tiger, Gali, and Golem I started with. ** The first monster I had that died, back in the second game, was a Clear Suezo. :( * Upon receiving Monster Rancher 3 as his first game on PS2 for Christmas, this troper proceeded to literally search EVERY nook and cranny of the house for ANY discs (excluding burned discs) to extract the beasties from. His encyclopedia's practically 3/4 done! And the ones he can't get (due to being a not-high-enough rank) are held until he can beat the game. * What's everyone's favorite Monster? {{Lalalei2001}}'s is the Pixie species, with a Mint/Aero specifically as her favorite. My least favorite is probably Gaboo. ** [[@/FreezairForALimitedTime Mine's]] Suzurin, with my specific favorite being the Suzurin/Antlan cross found only in ''Advance 2.'' I can't remember its name, but it's blue, which is enough for me. ** [[@/HumanaUox Mine's]] the Monol. I named mine [[ArthurCClarke Arthur]] * [[Tropers/ArleKaakun This troper]] has achieved the main game goal with a Phoenix (Who flew away after finishing half of Major 4) and the aforementioned Mint. [[VideoGameTime Several years later]], she decided to beat the whole Major 4 again [[ItAmusesMe just for kicks]], this time, with a [[OurGhostsAreDifferent Gho]][[StageMagician st]]. This time, only one monster defeated the whole thing, and proceeded to get [[BonusBoss Poritoka]] too (Because she was too much of a wuss to get Most) and got to the Hall of Fame... good times... * [[Tropers/ProMole Pro-Mole]] has just spent 30 whole minutes in an Errantry with a Pancho raised with high Int, mind you. In the woods. First, there was the whole "click in a spot 50 times and pray to {{God}} that the monster will go even close to that spot" drill for every one of the 4 spots where you must visit to find the special encounter. And then, for some reason, Cleo decided she didn't see anything and dismissed it, which means the whole ordeal was useless. Up to this point, poor Pumpkin was almost dead so I decided to get him as quick as possible home. You'd expect he would go home instantle, seeing it was exhausted... [[ArtificialStupidity but instead it kept

wandering away from home again, again, again and again, until I closed my DS to breathe deeply for a few seconds so I wouldn't toss it on a wall]]. Then the DS accidentally shut off, making me lose an hour worth of progress. WHO THE HECK DESIGNED THIS AI SO BADLY?! ** On a more cheerful note, I had an MP3 CD I recorded myself that created a Phoenix in Monster Rancher 2. It was probably my happiest moment in that whole game. ** If I recall (I don't do this much myself, so I might be wrong), lowering the monsters wits can make it a bit more obedient. * [[Tropers/alphamone]] Having the PAL version of Monster Rancher 2 (which is just Monster Rancher here), I was unable to use CD lists to get unique monsters (only about three or four are the same, one of which gives a differant unique to the NA version), but managed to find some unique monsters in the most unlikely places ever. I found one on two differant CGW magazine demo disks and another on a random collection of DoS era RPGs. However, my biggest achievement was finding out that Moo is spawned in the PAL version from Armageddon the Album. ---'''Holly[=/=]Colt:''' We're going to the [[Main/MonsterRancher main page]], aren't we? Or the [[Anime/MonsterRancher anime's page]]? ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MoodWhiplash * This troper has a seriously heavy amount of this in his life. Take my high school graduation for instance should've been a great and happy day right? Wrong! because after I got back from rehearsal I found me and my family were being evicted. I graduated from High School and ended up homeless living in a hotel. * This troper's brother is ''trying to get her tested for bi-polar disorder.'' But in all fairnes, they just don't understand why she laugh at pain (if your wondering its so if she cry they can't accuse her of being a crybaby, just crazy which can be good too...) Worse when she gets her period; like, dissolves into tears and then is bursting out laughing to hitting people. * This troper once attended a puppet show meant for kids, then later that night went to see the local art centers amateur production of TheCrucible. She even commented on how mood whiplashy it was. ** Same Troper as above: A new example comes from my theater class, I have two things I'm doing. One is the [[CrowningMomentOfHeartWarming first scene from]] ''Befriending Bertha,'' the other is taken from a part of ''TheDiaryOfAnneFrank,'' you can see where this leads. * This Troper unintentionally put {{Mood Whiplash}} in chapter three of [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6723215/1/Running_for_the_Manipulation_o f_Goods_and_Services this]] fanfic. Right after [[{{Hetalia}} England, Spain, France, Netherlands]], my OCs, [[{{One Piece}} the Straw Hats, the Supernovas, and the Shichibukai]] [[{{Nightmare Fuel}} sang In the Dark of the Night from]] {{Anastasia}}, [[{{Durarara}} Izaya and Shizuo]] sing Baby by Justin Bieber and [[{{Ouran High School Host

Club}} Tamaki]] [[{{Crowning Moment of Funny}} beat them up with a vaccum over the latter song]]. [[{{Amusing Injuries}} It wasn't just any vaccum]], [[{{Cultured Badass}} Tamaki]] [[{{Beyond the Impossible}} beat them up]] [[{{Refuge in Audacity}} with a Bissel vaccum]]. * This Troper's iPod put "Hey Jude" right after Finger Eleven's "Paralyzer". It was odd. ** This Troper's iPod once put a portion of Mozart's Requiem (I forget which) just before the Bullet in a Bible version of Green Day's St. Jimmy. ** My iPod seems to love putting soft sad songs right after angry rock ones, and vice versa. *** This Troper's played "Motteike Seifuku!(Lucky Star Theme)" right after "Sh*t is F*cked Up" by The Offspring. ** This troper's iPod once played "Strange Fruit", a brilliant but incredibly depressing, mournful song about black lynchings, immediately followed by ''"Sweet Home Alabama"''. Because I was in the perfect mood to celebrate the American South at that point. ** This happens to an extreme in my music library. Transitioning between Dying Fetus and the soundtrack from My Little Pony is fun. ** This Troper's ipod played "Here Comes the Sun" right after "Everything You Ever." * Easiest recipe for instant MoodWhiplash: being told by the woman you love that she actually does feel the same way about you...it's just that she has a boyfriend already. This troper knows this from ''multiple'' instances. ** Happened to this (other) troper last night. For some reason he's not bitter about it. Tends to happen often actually. * [[{{Tropers/Bob}} This troper]] accidentally managed to create MoodWhiplash when he started watching ''HigurashiNoNakuKoroNi'' directly after watching an episode of ''NagasareteAirantou''. ** This troper did the same thing with ''HigurashiNoNakuKoroNi'' right after [[SuzumiyaHaruhi The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya]]. And that's in addition to the mind-boggling amount of Mood Whiplash within ''HigurashiNoNakuKoroNi'' itself. * This troper had to wear a neck-brace after watching the first episode of ''Azumanga Daioh'' directly after ''the final episode of ''Gilgamesh''''. * An aversion: [[Tropers/ManCalledTrue This editor]] deliberately refused to watch anything cheerful for the entire rest of the night after reading the last volume of ''SaiKano'', not wanting to invoke a MoodWhiplash. * [[Tropers/CabbitGirlEmi This troper]] was watching an episode of ''{{Kekkaishi}}'' which ends with [[spoiler: Gen dying.]] It's followed by an episode of ''FullmetalAlchemist Brotherhood'', which began with Ed and Al searching for the panda cub belonging to the little Chinese girl. Keep in mind that unlike the first anime, ''Brotherhood'' often see-saws between comedy and drama. * [[Tropers/JapaneseTeeth This editor]] one-ups you both: He read ''[[{{Yotsubato}} Yotsuba&]]'' directly after reading ''ElfenLied''. Ouch. ** I did something similar: NeonGenesisEvangelion----

>HigurashiNoNakuKoroNi--->AzumangaDaioh * Try Watching "End of Evangelion" after watching "FLCL". ** This troper watched it a few hours before going to a church super bowl party. How's that for mood whiplash? *** That depends, how'd your team do? *** I was rooting for the Steelers and they won. * This troper watched ElfenLied and [[ItsTheGreatPumpkinCharlieBrown It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown]] right next to each other. * [[{{Tropers/Guessmyname}} This troper]] once read LoveHina whilst listening to [[NeonGenesisEvangelion Kom, Susser Todd]] (by random chance, courtesy of iTunes on shuffle). Which meant he was laughing whilst listening to song about suicide. ''That'' took a while to explain to the family... * This troper started trying to do this deliberately, to avoid triggering excess depressive. This has involved such juxtapositions as, for instance, DeathNote and LoveHina, and the current stretch consisting of NeonGenesisEvangelion/End of Evangelion, Trigun, and HigurashiNoNakuKoroNi, in that order. Next up, looking for something complicated but cheery before ParanoiaAgent. * Similar to one of the above, [[{{Tropers/Jercox}} this troper]] has been reading ''SchoolRumble'' and ''ElfenLied''. Usually, he would chide himself for reading ''SchoolRumble'' first, leaving only doom and gloom thereafter, but lately ''SchoolRumble'' has been having a mood whiplash of its own, giving this troper doom and gloom pretty much all the time. Hooray. * This other troper, on the other hand, generally ''tries'' to provoke in himself the MoodWhiplash after watching something sad, on the grounds that he's hyper-empathic and so he feels ''extremely'' like crap. He's found that a couple random episodes of ''LuckyStar'' prove surprisingly therapeutic in this effort. * This troper (and this troper's brother) generally watch two episodes of anime in the evenings, when watching ''ElfenLied'' we would ''deliberately'' follow it up with an episode of ''PaniPoniDash'' so we could calm down! * This troper's MP3 collection tends to come up with mood whiplash when set to shuffle. Including following a long, angsty epic porg rock track with a slow fadeout to a few seconds of silence with a metal track starting loud, fast, and instantly. This habit caused his previous MP3 player to be confined to the bottom of a pile of documents and be replaced with a fancy expensive new model. ** If your taste is diverse enough, putting your entire music library on shuffle is a continuous case of whiplash. Case in point from this troper: Bach (baroque classical) -> Agalloch (prog-influenced metal) > GZA (gangsta rap) -> Benedictine Monks (not-so-ominous Latin chanting). *** [[Tropers/ThinksTooMuch This troper]] concurs. My iPod contains LinkinPark, AFI, {{Enya}} (the reigning queen of soothing music), LizPhair, and MaryChapinCarpenter, among others. Putting it on shuffle is an instant recipe for this trope. ** The {{Music/Muse}} song "Unintended" is a personal favourite; quite quiet, and with a reasonable chunk of romantic longing. It caused near-fatal hilarity when it came up on shuffle immediately after Mitch

Benn's "Doctor Who Girl." ** 99 Luftballons->Evanescence->Weird Al Show theme->[[TheBeatles Octopus's Garden]]->[[TheLegendOfZelda Saria's Song]]>[[TheyMightBeGiants The Guitar]]->[[TheyMightBeGiants Why Does The Sun Shine (The Sun Is A Mass Of Incandescent Gas]]->[[TheBeatles While My Guitar Gently Weeps]] [[KickTheDog as the shower ran cold]]. ** This Troper's iPod does the same thing on an insane scale. Sigur Rs (soothing icelandic prog rock) --> Of Montreal (hyper happy exciting with disco bass) --> Nick Cave (dark brooding sortof rap) --> Noah and the Whale (morbid but cheerful folk) --> Black Moth Super Rainbow (LSD-laced psychadelic electronica) --> Dungen (psychadelic Swedish folk rock with lots of flute and fiddle) --> Beirut (Balkanesque orchestra pieces with a wavery singer's voice) --> The Smiths (early alternative). And this is a typical day. Gah. * [[{{Indigo}} This troper]] once suffered MoodWhiplash due to a friend renting ''GraveOfTheFireflies'' because it was anime and she didn't know that the fun kind of anime wasn't the only kind there is. * Just yesterday, I was watching an animutation when my parents rang to say that my grandpa was dying. Yep. * This troper kept switching between {{Chowder}} and GraveOfTheFireflies, experiencing MoodWhiplash about every 2 minutes. * This troper was feeling down after watching [[WhamEpisode Episodes 18 and 19]] of CodeGeass, and so he tried to invoke this by watching {{Clannad}} to cheer himself up. Unfortunately, he was on [[TearJerker Fuko's arc]]. ** More recently, a group of my friends got together after a D&D game. We watched a few episodes of {{Firefly}}, and then went straight into BattlestarGalactica. Yeah. * This troper's college anime club once decided to run an entire semester of this. Every Wednesday night we would have two episodes each of ''NeonGenesisEvangelion'', ''RevolutionaryGirlUtena'', and... ''KodomoNoOmocha''. * Do yourself a favor and don't read ''[[{{Fluff}} Wolverine: First Class]]'' right before you start the ''MobyDick'' comics. [[Tropers/GwenStacyWannabe This troper]] learned THAT lesson the hard way, while trying to cram... * A rather more serious mood whiplash, some of this troper's various [[{{Dojikko}} spectacular accidents]] led to a friend asking if cuts on the wrist were due to self harm, treating it as a big joke: -->"Ah come on, what do you take me for? Who does that?". The response? -->"Um, I kinda do." * This troper once created two playlists, one of all the really sad songs, one of all the really happy songs. Then he set up an automatic playlist which alternated them... * This troper deliberately causes her own Mood Whiplash after reading, watching, or listening to anything scary, gorey, or just really really depressing. (Going so far as to make a playlist on her ipod specifically for all the bright and happy songs she scrambles for after listening to Evanescence for too long.) * This troper's musicals playlist has come up with some interesting combinations when put on shuffle. ''Sweeney Todd's'' "The Barber and

His Wife" followed up by "My Girlfriend, Who Lives In Canada" from ''Avenue Q'', for example. * [[{{Tropers/Shini}} This troper]] did it to herself by immediately switching from {{Metal Gear Solid}}: "Sons of Liberty" to {{dot Hack}} GU - the sharp contrast in art style and mood caused a headache. ** And for her playlist, it went from Poison's "Your Momma Don't Dance" to Heather Dale's "Mordred's Lullaby". * This troper finds MoodWhiplash a good way to fight TheTetrisEffect. In an unrelated tale from the same troper (morbid, read at your own risk), right after the funeral of one of his best friends, the rest of the Nakama came to the tropers house for pizza, pot and beer, all in loving memory of the funniest pothead we ever met. * This troper was in a rhetoric class with a rather jokey professor. We were all snickering and generally carousing it up before class when one girl, who'd missed the previous two classes, came in. The professor looked at her, said, "Hey! Where've you been?" She replied in complete deadpan, "In Phoenix attending my dad's funeral." Cue room silence and a very awkward "...Oh. You're off the hook," from the professor. * I will often walk in an extremley weird way then instantly walk normally with a very serious look on my face. I also often make funny faces followed by a serious one. I also seem to have developed a habit of scowling after laughing, even if I wasn't scowling before. * [[{{Tropers/Sikon}} I]] found ''SerialExperimentsLain'' so utterly depressing and draining to watch that I had to alternate it with ''ExcelSaga'', in chunks of one episode of each. ** Replace ''SerialExperimentLain'' with ''Anime/{{Monster}}'' and you have this troper's experience. * This troper had a really interesting experience when watching ''PrincessTutu''... in the breaks between reading parts of ''Anime/{{Monster}}''. * [[{{Tropers/Lurkerbunny}} This troper]] purposefully tried to take the edge off having watched ''OneHourPhoto'' for the first time by watching... ''MorkAndMindy''. It actually made her feel '''''more''''' creeped out. ** On a similar note, [[{{Tropers/Nausicaa}} this troper]] tried to take the edge off a listen to ''The Grim Rapper'' by listening to ''Friend Like Me'' straight after. It... didn't work. She was in ''tears'' afterwards. ** And then [[{{Tropers/Lurkerbunny}} this troper]] was watching ''Jack'' on TBS, when she saw that ''The Best Of Times'' was playing on one of the Encore channels. So she switched to it during the TBS commercial breaks and then back and forth. And for those who don't understand, ''The Best Of Times'' is a rather idealistic 1980s comedy, and ''Jack'' is a TearJerker with a little comic relief. A little. * This Troper tried to watch the final episodes of Neon Genesis Evangelion (not End Of Eva, but just the final episodes) while reading Lucky Star. Swirly colours. * This Troper has been putting up a series of videos on YouTube which is a collection of anime openings. I now think it was a mistake to end the [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o75rz9pKfkk 9th video]] that inlucded the openings for RozenMaiden, SailorMoon, StrikeWitches and

TokyoMewMew with the opening to ElfenLied! * This troper purposely read FairyTail and [[{{Karin}} Chibi Vampire]] after reading volume 6 or 7 of GhostHunt so as to get the terrifying images out of her brain before she went to sleep. * A while back, This Troper tried watching Bokurano, and found it so depressing that she had to watch a few episodes of TengenToppaGurrenLagann afterwards to cheer herself up again. * This troper has to cause Mood Whiplash for herself if she reads or watches something scary. Overactive imagination about monsters dismembering me is usually quieted by thoughts of miniature robot fluff. * [[Tropers/MegaTroopX This troper]] followed the conclusion of ''{{Simoun}}'' with several episodes of ''{{Chobits}}''. (I'm still in the "Chii doing cute things" part of the story). * At a recent anime club, one troper got to see it in action with a hilarious Hard Gay segment, followed by a depressing music video segment about a girl mourning her mother; this was immediately followed up with even more Hard Gay. * This troper's iPod seems to have a hidden {{MoodWhiplash}} setting. I've had it go from "Glitter and Be Gay" from ''Candide'' to ''Caramelldancen'' to [[{{Portal}} ''Still Alive'']]. * Watch one of ''NeonGenesisEvangelion'' 's more jarring episodes (This troper recomments episode 5, 18, 19, 20, or 24), or ''End of Evangelion''. Then, watch ''Puchi Eva'' or [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEDtBYekHsY this]] {{YouTube Poop}}. * This Troper's group of friends usually sits at one table before school, and we hang out, have a good time, etc. One day, near the beginning of first period, one of the girls leaves to go to her classes, and a cheesy grin from her prompts one of the guys to say "Uh, your teeth are horrible." "Yeah, THANKS." She storms out with a huff, and the whole table goes from lively conversation to '''''dead silence'''''. "What? What's going on?" "You never insult Jamie's teeth." ** He did apologize afterwards, though. * This troper plans to induce mood whiplash by watching volume 4 of DeathNote (once the place he buys the series off gets more copies in stock) and immediately following it with MontyPythonsFlyingCircus (the boxed-set of which he got for Christmas) * The ''AdultSwim'' website seems to be made to do this. This troper watched the "Harvey Birdman: Attroney at Law" super-puberty episode, then the Code Geass R2 that starts with [[spoiler: Lelouch the cell phone with Nunally]]. As soon as she fought the urge to give poor Lulu a hug, ''Family Guy'' started. * This Troper has had 2 recent experiences: ** Said troper just started to play DeadSpace, and the gross NightmareFuel weight made him fire up Songbird and set a ''really'' long [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I%27ve I've music]] playlist in order to fight off the scary factor. A pretty weird MoodWhiplash indeed. ** Said troper lately has been engaged to cheesy harem and romance anime (KonoAozoraNiYakusokuWo, OtomeWaBokuNiKoishiteru, Karin, MyselfYourself, AkaneIroNiSomaruSaka, etc.). Many times, the cheesy

factor is so high that after watching a couple of eps, he desperately needs to [[UnrealTournamentIII crush some Necris with its own DarkWalker in a Warfare map]] just to kill the mood. Sometimes even pausing Media Player Classic and firing up [=UT3=] in a whim. * This troper had MoodWhiplash when she half watched LuckyStar while reading Uzumaki, making a 2 hour long session of mood whiplash. The day before she read the first half of Uzumaki while listening to [[TheMelancholyofHaruhiSuzumiya Hare Hare Yukai]]. * This troper was informed from an acquaintance that someone he knew was talking about committing suicide in a chat he used to frequent. Driven by a curiosity to see how things played out, and wanting to provide support if said acquaintance needed it, as well as him not feeling that he was alone in the matter, I entered the chat. After being there two hours and not typing anything, I finally typed one sentence for clarification's sake. Apparently, someone didn't see me come into the chat, because the next words that displayed on the screen were "[[AC: WHERE THE HELL DID YOU COME FROM]]". Cue [[CrowningMomentofFunny everyone active in the room bursting out into laughter]], the suicide girl laughing so hard that ramen was coming out through her nose, and me being proclaimed a ninja. I felt pretty proud of myself afterward. * This troper and his cousin saw StrangerThanFiction, and then immediately after we watched The Fountain, an extremely trippy/semidepressing Aronofsky film. This troper also watched TengenToppaGurrenLagann immediately after NeonGenesisEvangelion. * After watching the Miku Miku Dance version of Saihate (which did not have dancing) I proceded to watch it's video response, Kaito doing Caramelldansen. For bonus points, there was a video in the related videos bar called, "give it back my pants" and what looked like various vocaloids in their underwear doing the Hare Hare Yukai. Turns out it was just Dancing Samurai, but the video was still strange enough to add to the mood whiplash, so strange that I didn't want to finish it. Also, Listening to Azumanga Daioh music while playing Heli Attack Three is hilarious. ** Another {{Vocaloid}} related incident occurred when [[{{Mysterynovelist}} this troper]] went from ''[[TearJerker Regret Message]]'' to ''[[NightmareFuel Alice Human Sacrifice]]''; needless to say, she went from borderline crying to being scared shitless in a matter of seconds. ** This troper watched the [[TearJerker ''Servant of Evil'']] series directly after POPIPO. Of course, you could watch any happy Len song (''Give Me Back My Pants!'', ''Hot Cocoa'', ''Gemini''), click a related video...and at the end of it Len will die. [[TheWoobie He does that a lot.]] * For this, watch Clannad. This troper can say he was laughing two minutes after he cried. ** This Troper agrees. When watching that show, he sometimes couldn't tell if the tears on his face were from the heartwrenching scene he was watching now, or from when he was laughing himself into asphyxiation a minute ago. * This troper and her parents went to go see TheWrestler, a thoroughly depressing film. On the way home, we listened to the Wicked

soundtrack, starting with "One Short Day". My dad even remarked on the inappropriateness of the cheerful music. * [[Tropers/HersheleOstropoler This troper]] read ''{{Watchmen}}'' straight through one afternoon recently. That night he went to a comedy show. Yeah.... * [[Tropers/CharlieBrown This troper]], in one day not too long ago...good lord: ** Irritable: Bad day at work. ** Excited: Fortune cookie fortune - "You will soon receive pleasant news of a personal nature." ** [[ICantBelieveAGuyLikeYouWouldNoticeMe Cloud 9]]: A heart-shaped rock formation is left at my doorstep. ** Creeped: ''No idea'' who would leave such formation at my doorstep. ** Annoyed: (female) roommate comes home, sees structure, and has a [[TheLibby Libby]] moment about how it ''had'' to be one of ''her'' admirers/stalkers, and that there's no way someone could be crushing on ''me''. ** Nostalgic: Wonders if his ex is the heart structure sculptor, and reminisces on the good times. ** {{Berserk Button}}: Remembers the last thing the ex did to him. If it is her, [[GonnaNeedMoreTrope she'll need more rocks, to say the least.]] ** {{Tear Jerker}}: Read {{Naruto}} Chapter 437. * This troper edits anime for Sci Fi channel sometimes. I started by watching {{Berserk}}, followed by ElfenLied and {{Gantz}}. I later watched {{DearS}} before {{Berserk}}. A more recent case was a week from this writing. A friend of mine gave me advice to watch something funny after episode 13 of CodeGeass R2 ([[spoiler: the one where Shirley dies]]). I took that advice and watch the TheBoondocks episode "The Story of Catcher Freeman" after the end of that CG episode. It sure cured me right up. Afterwards, said friend who gave me the advice thanked me for taking that advice and sticking with it. * Going from seeing a performance of ''The Importance of Being Earnest'' right to watching EventHorizon. * Alternating between reading Watchmen and watching Animaniacs was a...bizarre experience to say the least. * [[{{Tropers/Mysterynovelist}} This troper]] recalls once watching ''Naruto'' when she was younger and then her brother switching the channel to watch Barney, who was singing 'I Love You'; the whole thing felt like a MindRape sequence that caused her to laying on the bed ''twitching'' for two whole minutes. * this troper's brother once suggested watching the Hanna Montana movie, right after we had gotten out of Know1ng. We pounced on him precisely because of this trope. * [[{{Tropers/Scarab}} This troper]] is the ''master'' of mood whiplash. It's gotten to a point where she doesn't like to laugh too much anymore because she always goes from laughing her guts out to sobbing her heart out of her ribcage... * Not sure if this counts, but [[Tropers/TheOtakuNinja this troper]] got one after watching two Dave Matthews Band music videos one after the other on TV: the sweet and catchy song "Dreamgirl", followed immedietly by the considerably creepy "Gravedigger". Needless to say,

moods were shifted. * This troper was watching the History Channel, and they had a documentary on the 2012 prophecy. At the end of it, they said that most of predictions had a ray of hope, saying humanity could save itself, we may have a chance, things will be okay, all that. Just as the troper was feeling pretty damn good, it ended and ANOTHER 2012 documentary came on....which began by saying that mankind was totally doomed and there was nothing we could do to save ourselves. Damn you, History Channel! * Don't watch the English ''{{Berserk}}'' after watching the 4kids version of ''{{One Piece}}''. You start to form weird associations. ** [[HeyItsThatVoice Oh dear god. I think I know what you're talking about.]] * This Troper's playlist possesses "Never Gonna Give You Up," and "Cross My Heart and Hope To Die" one after the other. One is a cheery and (due to context) funny song about everlasting love, coming from an 80's icon. The other is about self-destruction over the death of a loved one coming from a band whose songs almost all feature the singer expressing a desire for SOMEBODY to die. It alternates between happy, sad, angry. Jonathan Coulton, Flaming Lips, Metallica, Maiden, Amorphis. Indie pop and death metal, etc. etc. * As far as itunes on shuffle goes, the strangest combination of two songs [[MikeK this troper]] has gotten in a row was "Lux Aeterna" from the ''2001: A Space Odyssey'' soundtrack (an otherworldly, dissonant choral piece that's listed on the HighOctaneNightmareFuel page for a reason), and "Georgia Sings Yes" by Georgia And August Greenberg (er, [[http://www.archive.org/download/csr010/csr010-6_georgia-singsyes.mp3 a very cute-sounding six year old repeatedly singing the word "yes" over peppy moog and piano music]]). * This troper once received a wonderful gift from an online friend and felt absolutely wonderful. She then put her music player on random...to get the [[TearJerker the theme for]] ''SchindlersList''. So much for the happy feeling. * When set to shuffle, [[DoctorNemesis This Troper's]] iPod seems determined to provoke MoodWhiplash. One noticeable example involved Jodi Mitchell's "Both Sides Now", The Beatles' "Octopus' Garden", Elvis Presley's "In The Ghetto" and, to cap things off, Bobby [=McFerrin=]'s "Don't Worry Be Happy". * [[Tropers/KingSonnDeeDoo This Troper]] had been watching the 1997 ''{{Geroge Of The Jungle}}'' film, which she always finds rather amusing. When she'd finished, she was on the way to bed (and still laughing over some things from the movie), when she noticed her dog (who'd been declared as having a heart murmur by the vet a day or two before), lying in his basket, and ''wasn't breathing''. Cue running to her parents crying, but [[ItGotWorse it gets worse]], when said troper later learned the {{Awful Truth}} - Macks (the dog) had died of a heart attack ''whilst she was watching the film'', and her parents were planning on keeping it secret until the next morning. * This troper's iPod decided to do this one day: ''[[NeonGenesisEvangelion Angel of Doom]]'' followed immediately by ''[[LuckyStar Motteke! Sailor Fuku]]''. The only way this could have been a bigger whiplash was if the iPod had chosen

''[[DragonBallAbridged Ghost Nappa]]''. * [[Tropers/MissTwister This Troper]] had an instance of this about a week ago. Her aunt and two cousins had come to visit, and they decided to go out for pizza. After that, they got in the car, and This Troper and one of her cousins began reenacting "[[PotterPuppetPals The Mysterious Ticking Noise]]". Then, they went to visit This Troper's great-grandmother, [[TearJerker who was in the hospital, dying of kidney failure]]. After that? They went to see [[HarryPotter Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince]], and later went shopping. * Me: * watches the end of ''[[BtVS Passion]]'' - the episode where [[spoiler:Jenny Calendar dies]]* Brother, who was annoyed that I was hogging the computer: It's about time. * Oh, man. I was talking to my best friend/ex-girlfriend, performing my occasional role as the Emotional Sponge. I went from consoling her and trying to improve her mood to bing slightly creeped out when she mentioned her desire to make out with her pillow and pretend that it was with some Anime characters she liked to having her remind me that she still holds a flame for me. * In the Same week-end this troper's school won stage challenge (a big dance competition) and watched the FullMetalAlchemist episode where Maes Hughs dies. On monday this tropers freind used it to torture him "WE WON!!!" :) "Hues is dead" :( "WE WON!!!" :) "Hues is dead" :( "WE WON!!!" :) "Hues is dead" :( etc... * This troper was left depressed after NeonGenesisEvangelion (despite interpreting 25-26 as a happy ending) and had to watch the first few episodes of TTGL. THAT was the MoodWhiplash this troper was seeking. * Listen to [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iH4nB_qVsik the Main Theme of Final Fantasy IX.]] Then listen to [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lGf2b1H91JA Love Theme from MGS4.]] Warning: the mood whiplash has been known to drive the listener to suicide. * [[Tropers/JET73L This Troper]] generally has an ArchiveBinge or two running alongside TV Tropes and whatever else he is doing, which gets pretty [[MoodWhiplash disconcerting]] when he starts catching up on bookmarked webcomics. At last count: Archive binges of "Most tearjerking moments of GunnerkriggCourt", SaturdayMorningBreakfastCereal, and [[{{Minus}} minus]], along with the (in progress as of this writing) {{Megatokyo}} arc where [[spoiler: Miho is confirmed "presumed dead"]], various after-battle sequences in LookingForGroup ([[MoodWhiplash including Richard's antics]]), and the arc of FreeFall where everyone gets in a big pie fight. (Most importantly: Falling down a PotHole to the MoodWhiplash page halfway through.) It's mind-numbing. ** The troper also eventually had to separate the end from the rest of Matchbox 20's "The Difference" ("slow dancing on the boulevard, in the quiet moments while the city's still...") before putting it into playlists. If you've ever heard the song, you know ''exactly'' when the cutoff point was. * [[Tropers/GGCrono This troper]] saw ''PonyoOnACliffByTheSea'' and ''PrincessMononoke'' for the first time on the same day. Yeesh. (Several friends commented that it could have been worse; it could have been ''GraveOfTheFireflies''.)

* This troper paused ''EasternPromises'', got into the car, and went to see ''[[Film/StarTrek Star Trek]]''. Russian Accent Whiplash. Similarly, going straight between NeilPatrickHarris in ''DoctorHorriblesSingAlongBlog'' to ''HowIMetYourMother'', and from thence to the 2001 concert version of ''SweeneyTodd'', was hellish. And in an actual troper tales example, my SeinfeldianConversation tends to drop others into this. * [[AcrossTheStars I]] remember a beautiful fall day when the temperature was perfect, the birds were singing in the morning, and no homework was to be had because it was time for standardized testing, so everyone was excited and cheerful. An hour later the principal came on the intercom and told us that a plane had hit the World Trade Center. We made it to the gym in time to watch the South Tower be hit and both towers collapse. I was in the sixth grade. * Have you ever tried watching ''TheMarvelousMisadventuresofFlapjack'' right after ''Changeling''? * Happened to this troper while meditating to "Book of Days" by Enya on Windows Media Player. I discovered too late that I had my player set to shuffle for my entire music collection. The next song? "Bohemian Polka". Cue the opposite of meditation. * [[{{Tropers/Ziggerfreud}} This Troper]] Gets mood whiplash every time he watches animal cops, '''OH MY GOD COLLAR EMBEDDED IN HIS NECK''', then cut to [[TastesLikeDiabetes Smarmy sugary disney commercials]]... [[FlatWhat what.]] * After reading the VillainSong entry, this troper took some time to listen to [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PNuUL_htUm0 this song]] and [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRO-M4XyAbM this one]]. It was quite unsettling to say the least. * This troper's current 'Recently Added' playlist on her iPod. All the 'effing way. The music is as follows: "Leaving in Coffins" by Psapp, "Cell Block Tango" from Chicago, "Vanilla Twilight" by Owl City, "Hill of Our Home" by Psapp, "Funhouse" by P!nk, "Does Anybody Hear Her" by Casting Crowns, "Cat and Mouse" by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey, "Today Is Gonna Be A Great Day" by Bowling for Soup, and "Piano Man" by Billy Joel to polish it all off. * "Clannnad" and "NeonGenesisEvangelion" If the in-show mood whiplash doesn't get you, watching them back to back certainly will. * Try "SerialExperimentsLain" followed by "[[GreatTeacherOnizuka GTO]]" for starters. Also, this troper, after watching "FiveCentimetersPerSecond", just had to wash out all the depression with an "Animaniacs" marathon. * [[Tropers/PentiumMMX2 This troper]] experinced this with his MP3 player, by having [[SuzumiyaHaruhi Hare Hare Yukai]] and [[{{Metalocalypse}} Hatredcoptor]] play back to back. Also, purposly invoked following an ArchiveBinge of ElfenLied by watching some LuckyStar right after ** A more recent example from the same [[@/PentiumMMX2 troper]] would be when listening to his mix of musico n his laptop on shuffle; with it going from [[JudasPriest The Hellion]] to [[PrinnyCanIReallyBeTheHero Asagi My Love]], or alternating between playing {{Half-Life}} and {{MapleStory}} one long weekend. * Right after showing a Christmas special of {{Elf}}, the television

immediately segued into LawAndOrderSVU. I and both of my roommates commented on it. * This troper's final exam for his psychology class went something like this: Last question: Suicide case study. Then right after that, the teacher wishing us a merry christmas. * This troper has rapid cycling bipolar disorder and at her worst cycled through depression (the crying kind), irritation, and urges to hurt her roommate in mere minutes during lunch in the mental hospital. * Kind of a variant on all the mp3 player shuffle instances: When [[MikeK I'm]] listening to full albums on itunes, I'll frequently neglect to put them into a new playlist, meaning after one album is finished, the first track by whatever artist is alphabetically next will immediately follow it. This can be kind of jarring when it leads to things like "My Weakness", the melancholy closing track of Moby's ''Play'', slowly fading out, then going straight to Johnathan Richman enthusiastically shouting "One two three four five six seven eight!" at the start of The Modern Lovers' "Roadrunner". * This troper had an awesome day at Carnival, only to come home and find that her slightly-under-the-weather dog actually had kidney failureand was less than a week from death. * Three weeks ago, [[{{Tropers/MiraShio}} my]] entire class was scolded for more than '''three hours''' by nearly all of our teachers for severe misbehavior. One of the teachers involved was our former adviser, under whom my class swept most of the school competitions and became known as the best class. Her words were absolutely dripping with disdain and disappointment, and the whole thing just made us all ashamed of ourselves. Barely a minute after we were dismissed, however, some of us got snarky again. And by the next day, it was like nothing happened. * [[{{Tropers/EveryonesFool}} This troper]] just recently started watching the Rurouni Kenshin anime after reading the manga for several volumes. Not only does the anime's lighthearted tone feel NOTHING like the serious action and high drama the manga had to offer (with a bit of humor thrown in), but the biggest mood whiplash of all comes from the first theme song, "Freckles." Just try and listen to it without going "WTF?" ten seconds in. * [[{{Tropers/Gancena}} This Troper]] has a ''huge'' emotional attachment to CuantaVida, and so this has happened a couple times. ** I ended up reading page 86 twice before understanding it. Upon the first reading, I was relieved to tears that [[spoiler:Sniper was not injured during Rojo's attack]]. [[ThatGuyWithTheGlasses Helllloooooo, best mood (and sleep!) ever!]] The next morning, I read comments, a friend's reaction text, and the page again and realized that -[[OhCrap oh, shit]] -- [[spoiler: yes he was. He'd been left blinded.]] Goodbyyyyeee, best mood ever... [[hottip:* :That morning was a Monday morning.]] ** Then, there was page 88. In fact the ''entire day'' was a series of Mood Whiplashes: *** Bad Start: Ash Wednesday Mass. *** Feeling Better: Browsing the Internet *** Bombshell: Seeing at 2AM that page 88 is up after some funny videos. I dive in headfirst. [[spoiler:I find out that Sniper's

dead.]] I do not sleep that night. *** Remedy: For part of that night, I watch FamilyGuy and RobotChicken to get my mind off the page. *** Regression: And then I spend the rest of it crying to sad songs. * This troper came to the Whoniverse by way of ''Torchwood'' (oh, the shame!) So after finishing "Children of Earth," she tried to find out more about that Captain Jack fellow...and suddenly [[EverybodyLives it all got better.]] * [[Tropers/FuriKuri This troper]]'s Speech class was doing informative topic speeches in class. The first speech: a somber presentation on human sex trafficking. The second? Ranch dressing. Yeah... * Ya know what? Teenage hormones are the worst mood whiplash. Ever. * This troper thought of himself at football as just another normal person, and has low self-esteem. When we got at choosing the team captains, there were two nominated people, when we start choosing, someone suddenly: ->Friend: Hey, can I vote for someone else than the nominated?" ->Oh... Ok ->Friend: I vote for * troper's name here* * I win the votation for %70 of the votes. Plus calling me by my first name (they always call me by my nickname), and BAM, out of nowhere, Im the captain. So I get home, being all happy, to discover my dear blueeyed 8 years old dobermann Max "The Good Dog", who I had raised since was just a small puppy, was dead. And had to bury him on my own since my parents were out on a trip to another city. You know, there IS a God out there, but hes a FUCKING. ASSHOLE. ** That is ... kind of NightmareFuel for this cat-owning troper. * When this troper was six years old, he beat his sister and babysitter at a board-game. Not long after, I was so happy about winning that I couldn't sleep. My babysitter heard my TV, and he came in and pinned me to a wall, yelling the whole time. The next day I looked at my bruises, and I swore to myself that I'd never play a game of candyland ever again. * Between me and my dad, my dad was bugging me about needing to exercise and I was getting mad (and feeling like I was about to cry) and my dad attempted to make a joke out of it: --> Dad: Oh look, she's getting mad at me, because I'm trying to get her to do something good for her. --> (I chuckle) --> Dad: Oh, she's upset cause I'm only doing what's best for her, that I know best. --> Me: ... And we've circled back into anger. * This troper has an experience: me and my friends were all eating lunch together in the cafeteria at school, cracking really awful puns, and that was when two groups gathered in the middle of the cafeteria and started the ''mother of all fights'', and for a few minutes, we were thrown into something like a lesser form of the Battle of Hogwarts, from the DAYD-verse. ** This troper experienced something similar when he was sitting in a restaurant, talking and laughing with a friend, when suddenly two groups of soccer hooligans started beating the crap out of each other

at the table right beside ours. * [[{{Tropers/Pita}} My]] [=MP4=] recently had a CrowningMomentOfAwesome. "Luka", a song about abuse (either child or spousal) went on, and right after that came "Wake Up Call", about a guy shooting his girlfriend. It also played "How To Save A Life" right after a friend told me about her attempted suicide, and "America Fuck Yeah" when I was in the middle of a rant on why America sucks and people should stop idealizing it. * With my iPod on shuffle, TheMoodyBlues was immediately followed by... {{Slayer}}. It was jarring, that's all I'm going to say. * This troper has had a nice, calming CelticWoman song be followed by a Nickelback song. * The list of the last songs this troper bought off iTunes swings wildly around... it starts with [=RuPaul=] and features Patrick Wolf, Madonna and Angelspit. * When this troper puts her iPod on shuffle, this happens. Cue Lady Gaga's "LoveGame" right after Green Day's "Restless Heart Syndrome". Or anything NIN then anything Gaga. Wow. * This troper had one last night, as I'm sure many other people did. He went to a concert and had the time of his life, including his favourite song being played and being able to meet some of the members afterwards. He arrived back home, unbelievably happy, to the news that his favourite singer, Ronnie James Dio, had died. * This editor, on a Youtube music video binge, once went from listening to "Tunak Tunak Tun" to listening to "[[{{Iji}} Further]]". Wow. * This troper has had some depression, some mood swings and various other problems for about a year and a half now, and normally got at least one period of feeling very sad for no specific reason every day. It's almost like the sad feelings NEEDS to get out at least once a day. If the day starts bad, it ends nice, if it starts bad, ends nice. Most extremely when troper is with friends, she is happy before she visits them, happy when with them, having a wonderful time ... and upon going home, mood goes straight into sadness for no other reason than apparently, she hasn't had the sad period that day, and everything had has been bottling up without her feeling it due to happiness, and therefore comes in such huge amounts it ends in a long period of crying. Today started bad, and thus; nice evening today. * Want a recipe for instant Main/MoodWhiplash? If you're depressed, click [[http://cristgaming.com/pirate.swf this]]. NOW. * Try listening to [[{{Portal}} "Still Alive"]] before listening to the [[WebOriginal.BonusStage "Bacon Man Song"]] * My dad is afflicted with this, frequently bouncing between high spirited ("Congrats on that good test score!"), enraged pottymouth(to be specific, the poop in a urinal type of potty), maliciously sarcastic, and what he calls "unpleasant". That is, he tells me that he will no longer yell at me (Yay!...right?), but he reserves the right to be "unpleasant" to everybody (One step forward, two steps back, much?). You may be unsurprised to know that he drove me to a suicidal state at a very young age, and that my psychiatrist (who was supposed to counsel me and my parents as a family, but dad believes that everyone else needs help, not him, so he stopped attending

sessions) has completely given up on helping my dad, in order to focus his energies in helping those who ''want'' to be helped. * One weekend of AdultSwim goes from [[FullmetalAlchemistBrotherhood the episode where Winry]] [[BreakTheCutie learns the truth]] [[{{Tearjerker}} about her parents' death]] to [[{{Kekkaishi}} Yoshimori helping a ghost pass on by making the best cake in the world]] within the span of an hour. Huh? * This troper went from [[HappyEnding happy after finishing]] {{InuYasha}} to really [[DownerEnding depressed after finishing]] ZetaGundam, CasshernSins, RomeoXJuliet and NabariNoOu anime all at once. Ouch. * This troper saw 3 episodes of Azumangah Daioh, then Saw V, then went to see the remake of Karate Kid in the cinema with his little cousin and then saw Saw VI at home with lights off. Weird day * Wake up in the morning feeling like P-Diddy, stumbling into the kitchen to find that there is no more bread, finding a twenty dollar bill on the way to the grocery store, get rejected by all your friends when inviting them over to your house, be reunited with an old friend, get into a fight with your other friend, recive a text from that guy you like and then recive the news that your grandpa slipped on the stairs and is in the hospital. EH. * FullMonty was on TV. Literally the moment the gnome scene finished, an ad popped up that said 3,000 children will die of dehydration. We couldn't stop laughing. * Here's a fun game! Need some background music? Go over to the MohsScaleOfRockAndMetalHardness page. Click one of the links under the "Level 1" list. After the song is done, scroll down and click one from under the "Level 11" list. Continuously alternate between 1 and 11 level songs. * In college, this troper watched, for the first time and one after the other, ThePrincessBride and {{Kids}}. The resulting emotional state was...weird. * A girl from my school who liked me eagerly gave me her number... The following day she treated me coldly and seemingly got together with another guy. She was going to be my first girlfriend. Days later, another girl who likes me started hanging around with me... But then I find out she already has a boyfriend. [[{{Understatement}} Talk about unlucky.]] * This troper's MP3 player seems to enjoy doing this. When set to shuffle once, it started off with Okkusenman. (Which for those who don't know, is a song about a guy reflecting on his carefree days as a kid, set to the Wily Castle 1&2 theme from Megaman 2.) The next song to come up is Billy in Despair, the second ending theme to the DeathNote anime, which is what can only be described as a heavy metal/hip hop hybrid about, well, the [[CaptainObvious Death Note.]] After that came Caramelldansen Speedycake Remix, followed by the [[{{Kirby}} Zero-Two]] battle theme. (Zero-Two being a giant bleeding eyeball with wings and a halo.) After ''that,'' it jumps to the hyper Frontier Brain theme from [[PokemonDiamondAndPearl Pokemon Platinum,]] and finishes off with 16 Melodies, the credits theme to [[MotherThree Mother 3]] (Which follows some pretty big mood whiplash in the game itself.) Needless to say, it took a while to grasp what the hell just

happened. * [[@/RedWren This troper]] accidentally did this to the females who were helping with the middle school talent show. She was singing [[{{Wicked}} 'Defying Gravity']]--or, for those of you not in the know, triumph incarnate. Climax of the song...and she runs off stage, sobbing. Yeah. Bad day. * This guy was watching an episode of some show on Discovery Health about a hospital where they treat really overweight people (we're talking 600+ lbs. here). In this show, they would always talk about how getting a liposuction was "giving up", and how sad it was that someone was leaving their care. The message was somewhat undermined when every first ad in every commercial break was for a show that lionized the heroic doctors that performed liposuctions and gave people their lives back. * This troper invokes Mood Whiplash on herself through her Ipod/Computer. One minute Britney Spears 'I'm A Slave 4 U" the next Fools Of Damnation by Epica. Or even "This Love" by The Veronicas then "In Another Life" by the same pair of woman. What Goes Around to Another Song by Justin Timberlake happened today. You get my point. ** Actually if you think about something too much/too little you can give yourself your own mood whiplash. One momant "Yay My Long Term Crush Loves Me Back" next momant "No He Doesn't He Hasn't Done X Y and Z and therefore he doesn't". Then go back to "But he Did do A B C so he must love me" then turn around again and be like "But is that enough to make me feel loved" Sad again...Over and over and over again! * This troper remembers the time when he is crying at the end of AngelBeats. Then he went on suggested to watch the entire saga of HalfLifeFullLifeConsequences and get tear in the end. Then he went out from his room and see {{Idiocracy}} in the television. This troper didn't see Idiocracy before. He cried (after laughter, for different reasons). * This Troper (Meyers07) starts watching OreImo episode 1 and 2 and thinks, "Hey! Isn't loving little sister is cute?" to his anime club. Then he suggests another sister-love titles. He receives suggestions such as AkiSora and KanaLittleSister. Then he starts Let's Playing the latter. TearJerker ensues. * This troper was on a forum where our discussion was dissolving in to a proper {{Hurricane Of Puns}} when a new guy posts to say that one of our posters had killed them selves... You could almost hear the soundtrack come to a screeching halt. * This troper was in a classroom on her second day of fourth grade, learning how to take care of the two class pets with the rest of the fourth graders. We needed to learn to pet them gently and set up who took them over vacation. One short speech by the principal later, two children were sobbing the hallway with the teacher, and parents were already showing up to pick up their kids. The date? September 11, 2001. * This troper usually listens to classic rock on the car stereo. Mood whiplash sets in after his church's Good Friday Tenebrae service in Latin. In fact, nothing sounds better than silence on that night. * This troper was spending the evening out with her friends, just

generally having a great time going places. Cue about the third email from her ex saying that he wanted to have a serious talk about [[WhatCouldHaveBeen what our lives could've been like if I hadn't broken up with him]]. * On this troper's iPod the last 5 downloads was this in spades. Michael Buble ballad, Weird Al polka medley, Celtic Woman fiddle piece, Real Folk Blues from Cowboy Bebop and ends with a Daniel Bedingfield remix. * This troper was in a production of Schoolhouse Rock Live! in high school. After an awesome opening night, the whole cast went to Village Inn to celebrate, riding the high of a stellar performance and in generally euphoric moods. About halfway through our meals, I received a call from my grandparents, asking where I was so they could pick me up. Thirty minutes later, I was at the hospital with the rest of my family, and an hour after that, my mother died. Needless to say, that earlier elation had long left me. * Due to a large natural disaster in this troper's home country (namely, the 2011 Brisbane flood), almost all television channels had rolling news updates replacing normal programming, about the largescale destruction. Apart from the children's channels. Which made channel surfing a particularly interesting experience... * Watching Australia Flood Disaster 2011, sit com (How I Met Your Mother, Till Death, Scrubs, maybe even Friends too) watch some more disaster and then back to sitcom, a second of disaster and then The Simpsons and then flood disaster. ** OR alternatively, my favorite artist blows away all the charts, top them around the world, does well, is talkative to her fans + thankful and going to two movies in two days, with my family and my friends...flash forward to me finding out one of my favourite facebook friends unfriended me for no good valid reason besides her being a bitch. Why does this keep happening to me!...and my friend wants to move out of her own house because her parents suck at life and it's goign to be hard to see her after she moves out....but it's a new year and feeling generally positive about it again. ** Or sending your favourite boy in the whole grade 7 roses for 7 years on valantines day 09 and then being rejected because you were to over the top with your passion and you ultiimately not getting together with him by the end of the year, but being happy because you'd meet some new people in the new year. * Invariable result of watching any show on the computer. Every time a dramatic scene comes on, just at the crucial moment... '''''Virus Database Has Been Updated!!!''''' * The radio: This troper heard "Jar of Hearts" a tearful ballad about a cheating man. Then she heard "Hips Don't Lie", an uproarious cheery latin dance tune. * This Troper experianced it today actually. The night before, I had learned that beloved leopard gecko had died of natural causes. The next day, after a decent day of school, I learned that I was accepted into my first choice college. We buried her later today, followed by my favorite food: steak! * This troper has this stat at max level. One moment he's happy-golucky. Next thing you know, he's calling everyone a fuckwad.

* During a recent sale, I decided to get 2 GCN games I hadn't played but wanted to: ''EternalDarkness'' and ''CustomRobo'' (I also got Okami PS2, but not the point). I'll tell you how the shift between playing the two works. ** OK, neither worked and I had to exchange them (For MGS3 and Pikmin). I did find Custom Robo again, and the endgame is very much an example. * This troper has the fan translation {{Mother 3}} on an emulator on his computer. Whenever he is on the computer, he has a tendency to check {{Homestuck}}. So he jumps between Mother 3 and Homestuck a lot and it's very disconcerting really. Also, his iTunes has a bunch of Homestuck albums, a few cheery happy chiptunes, and... the Mother 3 Love Theme. * This Troper was in a role play today. After a long, tense argument about whether or not I should follow a character who ran away, I said, "I'm going to go watch TV." I walked into the other room, sat down, and watched MY LITTLE PONY! :D * This troper, after being stressed out by playing Burger Restaurant 3, quit and pulled up a video of [[DisneyThemeParks It's a Small World.]] * This troper and her friends raided [[WorldOfWarcraft ICC]] the moment the Heroic Version became available to us. We beat it, and watched the [[TearJerker final cutscene]] of the raid in silence. The moment the cutscene was over however, the only thing heard over Ventrillo was our tank, yelling [[CrowningMomentOfFunny "I CALL THE BADASS MOUNT!"]] * This troper was in a production of ''OurTown'' in high school and during the wedding scene in Act II, it was staged that I was sitting next to the actress who played Mrs. Soames, who got very loud during this scene. The first time we rehearsed it, the techies put my chair a tad too close to Mrs. Soames' chair, so when she was going on about how wonderful the wedding was, I, in a quick bout of improv, began to move my chair farther away from her to move closer to the cast member on my left. The director thought it was hilarious and insisted I do it in the actual show. Come the weekend of the show, it got the biggest (and if I recall, only) group laugh of the night, which is for the best since (assuming you know the play) [[ShooOutTheClowns things go very somber during the third act.]] * In the second act of Grease, we decided to play [[GriefSong Hopelessly Devoted to You]], then [[RockAndRoll Shakin' at the High School Hop]], then, [[GriefSong Raining on Prom Night]]. * This troper was talking online to a friend. I was telling her about the toffee I'd made, which had actually cut my finger several times because the shape of the cases the toffees were in had gave them all really sharp spikes. She sympathised, hugged me, and I then changed the subject back to the music video we'd been discussing with the following line: "So, you were saying about the ad being for a whore rather than a sex doll?" * [[@/{{littlewhiterabbit}} This troperette]] just experienced some this morning while watching the news: They started with coverage of the damage from last night's severe weather across the southeast, which included what they're already calling one of the worst tornado

outbreaks in United States history, then cut to one of their anchors in London for more coverage of the upcoming royal wedding, then after that cut back to the weatherman who was reporting more severe storms today from Florida all the way up into New York with the possibility of producing ''more'' tornadoes ([[SarcasmMode oh how wonderful]]). It wouldn't have been so bad if those two stories hadn't been all they were reporting on. * This troper had two cases in his school's version of DiscoInferno: ** The first one serious, when [[spoiler: Jack and Tom crashed the car]], we didn't have the dialog of Tom trying to stop it so it was just the [[spoiler: crash]]. After that, there was a long blackout before the news announcement, usually we had music playing during blackouts but not this time. ** The second was a great source of {{Narm}}, when [[spoiler: Heathcliffe came to kill Jack]], not only did he [[{{Bowdlerise}} not have a gun]] (which would make sense, since kids are watching, [[FridgeLogic but we still had the song]] [[IntercourseWithYou "Hot Stuff"]]), but during the blackout after [[spoiler: Jack's supposed death]], we [[SoundtrackDissonance had the cheery main theme playing]]. * This troper once went to the park with two of her older friends, and we had a good time... [[ItGotWorse at first.]] I don't remember what happened to cause the MoodWhiplash, but the trip to the park ended with me being jabbed in the stomach with a skateboard, being told that I was annoying, and me running home crying. [[MamaBear My mother]] was enraged. * Last February I got very upset at school and was taken out for a day. [[TvTropesWillRuinYourLife Because Mom banned the computer from me]], [[DisproportionateRetribution I called]] [[WoundedGazelleGambit the police.]] (Don't worry, neither of my parents were locked up.) The next day was the Valentine's Dance, and I had a blast, especially with my friends [[CampStraight Matt]] and [[CloudCuckooLander Corey.]] I was laughing my head off, especially at Corey's parody of ''[[AvengedSevenfold Bat Country.]]'' * Another iPod Shuffle example. It's my preferance to have my iPod on shuffle whenever I listen to it, so I've had more than a few cases of Musical Mood Whiplash. But perhaps the most bizarre example was coming from [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EqWLpTKBFcU this song]] straight into [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07ElblKdX6A this one]]. Even me, who's used to regular mood whiplash from my iPod, couldn't help but be slightly amused by the contrast. ** Also, a case of me (Same troper) doing this on purpose; Right after watching GraveOfTheFireflies I watched an episode of TheITCrowd, in an attempt to put a stop to my InelegantBlubbering caused by the former. It didn't really work, it only led me to be both giggling at what I was currently watching while still in tears over what I'd watched moments before. * This troper watching that you tube video of the dog staring at cupcakes: Ahahahaha .... (cowers) stop staring please! ---Back to Main/MoodWhiplash. Or go to TearJerker, CrowningMomentOfFunny, or NightmareFuel. Whatever you feel like.

---<<|TroperTales|>>

MookHorrorShow * [[Tropers/{{Cuchulainn}} This troper]] used to play ''{{Doom}}'' with just the chainsaw, hiding behind corners and such, waiting for the various enemies to come close enough, and then hacking them to pieces, like a slasher flick. He called it "Phobos Chainsaw Massacre". * This troper [[HeroicSociopath loves]] how [[{{Halo}} Grunts panic when you smash an Elite's skull in with a gunbutt...]]

MoralEventHorizon '''Note: This page was revamped because it turned into what the CompleteMonster page previously was. Feel free to add original characters and RPs, but please do not add any real life examples.''' ---!!'''Original fiction:''' * In a [=DnD=] quest this troper is a part of, the two obvious personalities are a rational Paladin, and a beyond-evil Monk, I think. Of course, the moral event horizon is crossed constantly. One part of the quest, we rescued a Governor's daughter and got a ring that grants evil wishes. The other people (minus me, the paladin, and a gnome) proceeded to RAPE the poor girl, then use the ring of evil wishes to TURN HER BACK INTO A VIRGIN IN ORDER TO RAPE HER LIKE SHE WAS NEW. * In this troper's rp, Ein Woe stopped being funny when he coldbloodedly murdered the brother of his Dragon for failing three times. When the Dragon strikes back, Ein Woe beheads him instantly and says, "I never liked him. After all, [[WeHaveReserves I have reserves]]. Bring me another clone." * This Troper once played a character in an RP who tore out his son's [[OurSoulsAreDifferent soul]] from his chest to provide the power source to a [[{{HumongousMecha}} humongous]], [[CombiningMecha combining]] mecha whose component parts were named after the four horsemen of the apocalypse. This character eventually became this universe's AnthropomorphicPersonification of greed and kidnapped characters to turn them into superpowered abominations. Despite all this, [[MisaimedFandom some people on the forums]] still wanted to see him [[DracoInLeatherPants leather pants'ed]]. * In [[{{Tropers/llamasrnice}}]] this troper's novel, the square root of negative one divided by zero, the titular equation is a sentient being threatening to DESTROY THE MILKY WAY GALAXY by proving that 0 = any number. * In a SoulEater RP this troper participates in, Abelus, a clone of Asura, just crossed it. He was, at first, very sympathetic and depressed due to knowing what he was created from. He pretty much lost a lot of sympathy when he gave up trying to differentiate himself from Asura and then used his katana to kill the ClingyJealousGirl who liked him to distract an enemy he was fighting so he could defeat her too. And then he finished it up by joining with Arachne and planning an

invasion. * This troper's [=WoW=] RP character used to be an ambassador for a notable chunk of a Cthun cult, trying to keep fights with a protagonist order to a minimum. Stroll forward a year or so and you have a psychotic, MPD addled pyromaniac who has equal mastery of dual serrated sabers and engineered technology such as grenades, bombs, cloaking fields, and in one case, genetic engineering. Several elves were tortured, maimed, brutalised, or vivisected, and it all came to a head when his genetically engineered children (a pair of priestesses engineered for energy manipulation) were essentially torn out of their physical bodies and used as infiltrators by possessing key targets. He finally disappeared in a lab explosion following horrifying grafting experiments and a phlebotinum fueled attempt at a protean body for himself in the form of necrodermis (liquid metal). * {{CardCarryingVillain}}s seem to be pretty popular with RPers. * In a GURPS game this troper runs, a secret society attempting to come to power in a military dictatorship crossed this when it kidnapped and experimented on innocent children of every race in an attempt to create psychic [[SuperSoldier super soldiers]]. Inverted, however, by the actual dictator of said nation, who sort of did a reverse of this [[EvenEvilHasStandards when he not only condemned said society, but actively aided the nation he had gone to war with months previously in hunting said society down and bringing its members to justice]]. * Though he was banned before he could plot the fruition of it, this troper planned to turn his Paladin character into a CompleteMonster of a Deathknight. One of the things he was gonna do? Put a blade right through the chest of his character's brother. * Metrian, a member of the QuirkyMinibossSquad in ThisTroper's unfinished fantasy novel, shot into CompleteMonster status when he [[DoomedHometown destroyed the main characters' hometown]] with a [[SphereOfDestruction massive ball of dark magic]] [[ForTheEvulz because he was bored]] [[ForScience and he wanted to see if he could.]] [[AntiVillain His superior]] [[YouMonster was not happy.]] [[CompleteMonster Metrian]] [[InsultBackfire doesn't care.]] * A major villain (though not BigBad) of my game started out first as a BrokenBird, growing up to be a well-meaning protector of the peace and voice of the people. However, with the dark whisperings of her [[WellIntentionedExtremist brother]] and [[MagnificentBastard uncle]], they tried and eventually succeeded in getting her to go over the edge. What happened? After watching a RichBitch mother hitting her child in public, said villain's attempt to confront the woman was rebuffed and when the villain tried to take her in, the mother smugly reminded her that [[ScrewTheRulesIHaveMoney there would be no meaning regardless]]. In the villain's mind, it was bad enough to abuse a child, but for the 'wicked' to successfully stand their ground against being brought to justice was [[ThisIsUnforgivable unforgivable]]. Her brother and uncle played on this feeling, convincing her that maybe other aristocrats were like this woman and that an [[BreakTheHaughty example needed to be made]]. What example did the villain choose? To trick the abused daughter into offering her [[AssholeVictim mother]] a glass of acid at the party, and when it was drank, the villain came

forward and brutalized the mother physically, taunting her that she could no longer cry out for help because her vocal chords had melted. * If [[RolePlay/AndaliaTheGreatStorm Raize]] did not cross the MoralEventHorizon on the original play through when he burned down a city just to try to kill a demon responsible for a plague which turned people into demons, or when he killed someone for essentially calling him out for being increasingly ruthless, he crossed it permanently when he [[spoiler:picked up Zero Edge, became the Dark King, and started turning masses of people into undead because the undead are immune to demon magic, thus the "only way to fight the demons on equal ground." [[EvenEvilHasStandards Even]] [[ManipulativeBastard Kalein]] felt Raize was becoming too morally black.]] * In the final installment of a trilogy of stories [[@/PentiumMMX2 this troper]] wrote, the villain crosses the moral event horizon during the final act, as he, [[DrunkOnTheDarkSide after obtaining unlimited power]], proceeds to ruthlessly kill his own sister for helping the hero this whole time, which serves as a lead-in to the FinalBattle. * This Troper is trying to write up a series of story arcs based around a valley called 'Maeve', with is in both in the real world and secretly holding an EldritchLocation called 'Dreamescape', a magical world of FreakLabAccidents and [[AndIMustScream must screaming]] moments. Every story arc will either be set in the 'Dreamescape' or 'Hub' world. The citizens of Maeve are either insane or apathetic at best; in this case, they are DyingLikeAnimals. Each arc has its own set style - leave it to yourselves to find out [[WhereTheHellIsSpringfield Where The Hell Is Maeve]]. The first arc is of the strange murders in Dreamescape as [[FreakLabAccident the]] [[TheFool main]] [[LizardFolk character]] is trying to work along with LaResistance to track down 'Maeven Soldiers', and ItGetsWorse. Its style is somewhat akin to 1902 America (or, ya know, [[SelfDeprecation 1960 Ireland]].) ** Romlus: The first entry of my bad guys. In the first arc, ''Oddity'', he appears as a comforting father figure towards the main character, Benvolio, and keeps the record of the deaths in Maeve and plans their funerals. He starts going downhill when he excludes a young woman from having a funeral because she was pregnant at the time, [[InsaneTrollLogic and even said that ''it didn't count!'']]. He then manipulates TheCutie into shooting Ben in the face ([[IGotBetter Don't worry, he was okay afterwards]]) so Ben chould go into SuperSoldier mode and kill the Maeven Soldiers, and THEN refuses to list/set the funeral for the [[DisneyDeath death]] of ''his own adoptive son Broga'' because he ''technically'' died outside of Maeve. Later, it's revealed that he was working against The Warren, another CompleteMonster that is up next. ** The Warren: A failed SuperSoldier that was made the Warden of the [[TheAlcatraz Maeven Prison]] and also kept a watchful eye on the citizens. Unlike most of the characters who you don't learn are evil till later, The Warren is outright known for villainy. At first, he is [[EvilIsPetty petty]] and AffablyEvil... until we get to the back story of [[TheStoic Han]], where we see that Warren put Han in prison

for [[DisproportionateRetribution accidently breaking a relic inside the church]] ''when Han was eight years old''. Han was kept in a filthy environment, his 'cell' was pretty much a large canary cage in order to frighten him (he was scared of heights), any inmate who spoke to him got their lips sewn together, and THEN, ten years later, he forced Han to jump off the prison walls into the moat below (in a form of both death row and releasing Han). Han survived and later married The Warren's [[HoYay son]] as Wells and had a [[HomosexualReproduction daughter]]. After discovering this, Warren tries to kill both his own son and his newborn granddaughter. He is killed by [[KarmicDeath having his lips sewn together and being tossed into a river.]] ** Conka: Come on! TheCutie [[BreakTheCutie losing]] [[CutePsycho it]] completely? Conka is a seven year old FunnyAnimal that helps clean up the streets at night and lives with Broga and Romlus. After Romlus tricks him into thinking that Ben had killed people, Conka takes a colt gun and shots Ben in the face; after Ben explains that he never killed anyone, Conka went AxeCrazy and tried to stab [[PapaWolf Peter]] (the Resistance leader) and started [[TearJerker sobbing]]. He gets a CooldownHug from Ben, and then... he decides to kill Romlus for lying to him so he can have a normal life (it fails). Arc 2, ''Samhain Calling'', is more about the influence Dreamescape can have on Hub, by messing with the human main cast to outright killing them. Its style is more so modern day America or Ireland, parodying slasher films. The main characters are Bills and Jake Grimmly, two nerds trying to create a ''May Day Eve'' festival; unfortunately, their friend Jack [[NiceJobBreakingItHero accidentally disturbs a portal to Dreamescape]], releasing....... ** [[SevenDeadlySins The Seven]]: A group of supernatural beings created from human souls, similar to May-Eve. The ensemble bad guys of Arc 2. *** Namia: Lust. A sex addict that [[BlackWidow killed her lover shortly after sleeping with him.]] After using the same tactic many times, she started transforming into a spider-like monster with many arms. In human form, she tries to rape [[CelibateHero Nighteyes]], the young [[SexyPriest preacher]], and later, in spider form, she tries to seduce [[LovableSexManiac Bills]]. *** Balute: Wrath. A child that was [[OffingTheOffSpring killed by his parents]]. In human form, he taunts [[IronWoobie Jake]] because he is the younger brother, and also throws stones at [[ExtremeDoormat Jill]]. His monster form is of a [[NauseaFuel large newborn duck]] (Balut is a dish made of a half incubated duck egg), and in monster form he tries to kill everyone at the festival. *** Albert: Sloth. Originally, he was grounded for a month during summer break. To pass the time, he decided to sleep and [[ShutIn never leave his bed]]. Unfortunately, [[TooDumbToLive he forgot to eat or drink in between snoozes and his heart stopped]]. His parents tried to keep him alive via a feeding tube and a oxygen machine. But then his body went into massive proportions, crushing the leg and arm he was leaning on and covering him in sores. He appears to Jake in human form (ironicaly a handsome jock) in order to stop him from creating the

festival and wants him to [[FoeYay join in sleeping for an eternity]]. He continues to plague the characters through their dreams and actually causes Jack to go into sleeping paralysis. He is the only one of these villians to [[HeelFaceTurn join the good side]]. *** Ecstacy: Greed. A sado-masochist + Kleptomaniac. Started to cut herself to feel sexual pleasure, and at one point decided to commit suicide by strangulation. [[AndIMustScream She was trapped in a state between life and death]] and soon constantly started to hoard any form of sexual/valuable item. In human form, she steals Bills' wallet, and in monster form, she tries to strangle Officer Ronald for his gun. *** Mamoblub: Gluttony. Possibly a baker. He had [[ExtremeOmnivore pica]] and found almost anything tasty. He constantly offers the main characters treats like pie. His monster form is a large many-mouthed creature that eats [[IAmAHumanitarian '''EVERYTHING'''.]] *** Sa Kutaro: Envy. An out-of-towner that was part of a poor family. He grew jealous of the other kids and even his baby brother. He became so jealous that he started blaming all his faults on his folks, school, and friends, and even [[KickTheDog threatened to kill a first grader because she was playing with her teddy]]. In an attempt to kill Bills, he fell over a building edge and was impaled on a upright javelin that was for display. *** Adonphrite: Pride. Thinks of himself as the vision of beauty. TheBlank and somewhat a MadScientist. Spends his time [[PlayingWithSyringes experimenting]] with the main cast. Looks like a tall thin human with greyish-black skin, similar to The SlenderMan. Goes beyond the horizon when he hacks off the arms of [[TeamPet Grey]], who looks very similar to him. Arc 3: ''The Sonet of the May-Fly'' revolves around how Maeve was created/found. It parodies psychological horror, with many twists and turns. Set at least 200 years ago, it had the reason for the town's name and how much the real world affected life in Dreamescape and vice versa. Its style is similar to Wild West America. ** [[PunnyName May-Eve]]: A character that transcends the various arcs. She was one of the first groups of people who settled in Maeve and was the first to discover Dreamescape. She was proclaimed the mayor of Dreamescape by the residents. She was bullied heavily because of [[NatureHero her love for nature]] and her clumsy walk. One day in Hub, a bully [[BerserkButton killed her pet canary]]; she then smashed a potted plant over his head. She later met him in hospital and gave him flowers, trying to patch things up, even serving a two month prison sentence. Unfortunately, the bullies were now tormenting her [[BullyingTheDragon worse]] [[KidsAreCruel for]] [[YouthIsWastedOnTheDumb laughs]] to see if she'd go psycho again. She then tried her best to do good deeds to win back the affection of the town and her family; sadly, this being a story on insanity, she is actually ''[[NoGoodDeedGoesUnpunished blamed for crimes commited by the Maeven Soldiers, by her own family]]. No prize for guessing what she did then - murder all of her family, including her little sister, and then [[AccidentalNightmareFuel torture her bullies with electroshock therapy until their hearts gave out]]. After killing many

people, she runs through the forest and gets caught in a pit of mud (right between Dreamescape and Hub) and is [[AndIMustScream kinda]] killed. Soon, various birds start to nest on her decaying body and her body started to stretch and grow into plant matter, soon reaching over 42 feet high. She decided not to move [[PetTheDog because she didn't want to disturb the birds]]; in Oddity, it is shown that her left leg was big enough to house the upper half of the ElaborateUnderGroundBase, and in Arc 2: Samhain Callings, the part of her in Hub is mentioned to have been surrounded by a public park and becomes the hang-out area for the Arc 2 characters. Arc 4: ''Predicaments regarding the Caninis family'' is a fully Dreamescape story that goes deeper into the myths and legends. Set a year after Arc 2, the many FunnyAnimal residents of Dreamescape start to constantly visit Hub in order to exchange more information about both worlds. The [[MeaningfulName Caninis]] [[RoyallyScrewedUp family]] enjoys a ridiculously wealthy inheritance and lifestyle. Unlike Arc 1, this part of Dreamescape is actually a chunk of land known as Muadhnait (meaning: Little Noble One); this land is more oldfashioned than Maeve, having a style and class more recognized as Victorian England or Italy rather than 1900-2000's Ireland/America as Maeve was based on. Think of any GothicHorror trope, it will be in Arc 4 and throw in some LovecraftianHorror for more fun! ** Grandelder: Most likely the most disgusting being I have ever created. And yet I make him the VillainProtagonist. He owns the Caninis fortune and the small island the manor is built on. At the start, he is in a loving relationship with his wife Evanna, until he starts to become interested in the Maeven/Muadhnait folklore. He was the one who caused May-Eve to become the tree-giant she is now, His wife dies in childbirth, and he decides to create a [[ReligionOfEvil religion]] based on all of the myths he gathered (some he created himself) by malipulating an EldritchAbomination. To cut it down: He killed his second wife. He caused his third to believe she had a stillbirth where in reality he had abandoned the baby (Trivia: Peter from Arc 1 was the baby), he kicked his third son out of the house for courting a human woman, disowned his second daughter for marrying a commoner, [[ParentalIncest raped his first daughter]] and [[ChildByRape she had twins]] (the DecoyProtagonist Hick and Broga from Arc 1), he abandoned Broga, he put Hick into an insane asylum because he had autism, and when Hick grew up and got out he (Grandelder) tried to kill him, he killed his four year old grandson for religious reasons, and THEN he tries various times to kill the various characters from the other Arcs and contine torturing the EldritchAbomination into making everything orcording to plan . ** Finally......Weaver: TheChessMaster. The MagnificentBastard. The one causing and planning every single move in Maeve and Muadhnait. He caused the portals to Hub and Dreamescape, he created The Seven in Arc 2, the Maeven Soldiers in Arc 1, May-Eve's transformation in Arc 3, and of course, all of the predicaments in Arc 4. Whhhyyyyy you may ask? [[JustFollowingOrders Beacuse Grandelder told him to]]. Every ''Weaver's'' goal is to create a world and bend the reality of the world. This Weaver is worshiped as a god of creation in Dreamescape,

He changes history only if a person is able to find and speak to him. He is supposed to represent a writer or an artist pressured to change their work. He DOSE NOT want to serve under Grandelder and wants himdead, even if he has to send creatures to do so. Apparently he created [[TeamPet Grey]] from Arc 2 and created [[DifferentAsNightAndDay Noire and Bianca]] from Arc 1 and was the being that saved Benvolio in Arc 4. He has done some really bad things that were not of his intention but one might see him as needing puinishment. [[FridgeHorror ''There are other Weavers with their own worlds connected to Earth. This Weaver is the only benevolent one'']] * [[{{Tropers/Luigifan}} This Troper]]'s [unpublished] stories have a lot of villains, but most of them are {{Well Intentioned Extremist}}s (Drathilox, Green Horse & the Trophic Blenders, etc.) or {{Card Carrying Villain}}s [[EvenEvilHasStandards who nonetheless have standards]] (the League of Villains, Bill Stuffner, [[PunnyName Will Legal]] & [[MeaningfulName Ovar Huntin]] & [[EvilPoacher the Hillbilly Poachers]], etc). There are a few {{Complete Monster}}s around ([[ShadowTheHedgehog Black Doom & the Black Arms]], for instance), but one stands head and shoulders above the rest in terms of sheer ''evil''. This character is Donald Stuffner, the father of the aforementioned Bill Stuffner. Now, Bill Stuffner is rather obsessed with beauty and art, but his main method of making "art" is [[WaxMuseumMorgue drain the life out of beautiful maidens and "replace it with art"]] via a dimension of raw artistic energy dubbed the "[[AppliedPhlebotinum Art Flow]]". The Art Flow is basically raw artistic energy, which for some bizarre reason is highly toxic to those who are unable to tap into it. Needless to say, the heroes of my stories frequently have to remind Bill that "Murder is '''''NOT''''' art!!!!" However, when it comes to comparisons between himself and another artist, Bill's philosophy is "may the best win", and he's willing to accept losses. Furthermore, Bill Stuffner has a great deal of respect for ''all'' other artists, and not only will he refuse to kill them, he will fight to the death to protect them. This chivalrous side keeps Bill Stuffner well away from CompleteMonster status (though he's still [[BlueAndOrangeMorality a bizarre dude]] who you do ''not'' want to meet up with. Unless you're an artist. And even then, his antics will probably disgust you... unless you have no soul.) This is ''not'' true of Donald. Donald wants himself and his kin to be the best artists in the world, and is quite willing to kill anyone who's more respected than the Stuffner family to make sure of that. He particularly hates the Round family, who have been the main rivals of the Stuffners throughout history (with the Rounds specializing in the performance arts and the Stuffners sticking to non-performance arts; the Stuffners believe that performance art is too transient to be considered "art", and that it is thusly beneath them.) Thing is, the Rounds have pretty much always been regarded as the better artists. The major reasons for this are that the Rounds are generally nice people (while the Stuffners are typically {{Jerkass}}es at best, and {{serial killer}}s at worst), and that the Stuffners seem to fail hard on the whole "creativity" thing (which wouldn't be so bad if ''[[WaxMuseumMorgue they didn't KILL people to compensate for it]]''.) Anyways, Donald has made numerous attempts to kill off Lucy

Round[[hottip:*:the name is a pun on Lucille Ball, best known for ILoveLucy]], the current "heiress" (for lack of a better term) to the Round family name, but all have failed due to Lucy's own capacity for tapping into the Art Flow, the intervention of the Heroes' League (especially her boyfriend, Marcus Belnades), or both. This is where Donald crossed the MoralEventHorizon. Basically, he decided that if he couldn't kill Lucy directly, he'd instead [[DrivenToSuicide drive her to suicide]] by '''killing all of her friends and loved ones'''. Needless to say, the Heroes' League was [[ThisIsUnforgivable flabbergasted and horrified]] when they found out about this, and wasted ''no'' time in thwarting the plot. Still, the fact that Donald was all too willing to follow through with his scheme (and would have pulled it off if not for those meddling heroes) single-handedly makes him a CompleteMonster, and this isn't even ''mentioning'' all of the other atrocities he's committed. [[EvenEvilHasStandards Even Bill Stuffner - Donald's own son - is regularly disgusted by Donald's antics]] ([[EnemyMine and has even intervened to protect Lucy from Donald on numerous occasions]]), and Donald is doing all of this for Bill's sake! That should speak ''volumes'' about [[YouMonster how despicable Donald Stuffner really is]]... * This troper has written since the age of ten in his spare time, though the time is becoming a lot less easy to find. So naturally he has written a few of these moments in his spare time. He did a small set of short stories featuring a small band of mercenaries left in the ruins of New York, and had one of the mercenaries cross this when they saw a bus full of soldiers and blew it up with a landmine. In a superhero set of stories he had the villain cross it at the very end by pulling a grenade out ''in a school'' and trying to take out ANYTHING with him because he can. And in all my zombie stories, most of my villains cross this very quickly, as does a hero (after they have all they have ever known destroyed, mind.) * In this troper's (unpublished) story, the main character Michelle's [[{{Kawaiiko}} cute,]] [[CheerfulChild friendly,]] [[ChildrenAreInnocent innocent]] six-year-old imaginary friend and guide through the dream world (ItMakesSenseInContext), whose name is [[NamesToRunFromReallyFast Guinevere]] crosses it when Michelle finds out her true reason for being there at all. Guinevere claims that Michelle's subconscious brought her there (again, ItMakesSenseInContext), but later on, Michelle discovers that [[spoiler: Guinevere is really there because she wants to lead Michelle to her death, which will ultimately cause herself in the real world - who is trapped in a coma due to her mind being absent - to die.]] Her preferred punishment, however, is a FateWorseThanDeath [[spoiler: she wants to take control of Michelle's body, and do to Michelle what she did to her - [[AndIMustScream lock her in her mind for years and years without letting her out or acknowledging her at all.]]]] Note: Michelle is 21, and Guinevere is six. Since Guinevere stopped aging when Michelle stopped acknowledging her, this means that she was [[spoiler: [[AndIMustScream locked in Michelle's mind]] for ''15 years.'']] [[FateWorseThanDeath With no one to talk to, and no way of escaping.]] * One of this troper's characters in his as-of-yet unwritten story

crossed the MoralEventHorizon in his backstory, when he returned a hostage he took to the hostage's home country, after infecting said hostage with a potentially genocidal plague, betraying his demonic allies by [[AGodAmI proclaiming his godhood]], [[GodsNeedPrayerBadly taking the human support that the demons received to power himself up]], and sparking a war. In the story proper, he primarily [[CrossesTheLineTwice crosses the Moral Event Horizon twice]] [[spoiler: [[FaceHeelTurn except]] [[DevourTheDragon when]] [[OmnicidalManiac he doesn't]].]] * In [[Tropers/JusticeReaper my]] YuGiOh fan-fiction posted [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2388268/1/bYuGiOh_b_bForever_b here]] on FanfictionDotNet, I created a character who was not a BigBad, not a [[TheDragon Dragon]], but simply a member of a QuirkyMinibossSquad-but who managed to be a CompleteMonster who crossed the MoralEventHorizon in another character's back-story. [[spoiler:He murdered said character's mother and stole her soul to power an EldritchAbomination, then [[MindRape brainwashed]] [[HarmfulToMinors the then-six-year-old character and his little sister]] into becoming his slaves and members of his personal cult]]. ** Other examples from the same story include: *** The BigBad of one story arc crossed the MoralEventHorizon in his back-story by [[spoiler:orchestrating the murders of four main characters' parents via blowing up their airplane in mid-flight]]. *** The above [[BigBad Big Bad's]] [[TheDragon second-in-command]] crossed it by [[spoiler:mind-controlling the main protagonist's grandmother and using her in an attempt to murder him]]. *** Another character who acts as part of a QuirkyMinibossSquad in the story's final arc, and who used to be TheBully to four of the main characters in their collective back-story, crosses the line when [[spoiler:he threatens to rape his rival's girlfriend, with his dialogue indicating that it wouldn't be the first time he's done such a thing]]. ---You're such a [[ADarkerMe ruthless]], [[SmallNameBigEgo vicious]] [[BigBadWannabe monster]]! Go back to the MoralEventHorizon, [[{{Ptitle024v6ql5duby}} and don't think of returning!]] ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MoralGuardians [[AC:{{Theater}}]] * High school and middle school productions of plays often face ExecutiveMeddling from the school administration. At [[VennDiagram this troper]]'s school, students had to remove the pot-smoking from ''The Breakfast Club'' because the headmaster didn't want to send the message that pot brings people together. ** [[WhiteRoseDuelist This troper]] was in a high school production of ''The Wiz'' -- essentially "the black ''TheWizardOfOz''" -- where the school stripped out all the jive-speak. Many people wondered why, if

they didn't want any trace of black culture in the performance, they didn't just put on ''TheWizardOfOz''. *** Um, because it's perfectly possible to be black and not speak like a Jive Turkey? Also, what is black culture? You can't tell me that a black person living in New York has the same culture as one living in Nairobi? *** Yes, but within the United States, given our history of both legal and social segregation there are aspects of culture that are unique to the black experience which expresses itself as the above mentioned subculture. ** In college, this troper had a classmate whose high school production of ''AFunnyThingHappenedOnTheWayToTheForum'' was axed entirely after a parent complained it was sexist, and replaced with that old drama school standby ''TheMusicMan.'' ** Music Theatre International, which licenses a lot of musicals for community and school theatre, now beats the school administrators and parents to the punch. "School Editions" of shows like ''{{Rent}}'' and ''SweeneyTodd'' have been created with the input of the original writers/their estates. The school version of ''Sweeney Todd'' is PGrated according to their website. There's also a "Junior" version of ''Into the Woods'' which drops the '''entire second act''', gutting the show of [[{{Deconstruction}} its point]], apparently just so kids can perform it without anybody complaining -- even though the fulllength version they continue to license has been used for '''years''' by junior and high schools. They're also working on a PG version of ''TheProducers''. ***** The decision to perform the edited version was one for which this troper made her high school pay dearly for. She was the [[{{Deadpan Snarker}} snarkiest]], [[{{Lemony Narrator}} lemoniest]] Narrator imaginable. *** A high school version for ''[[{{Theatre/ptitlenjisnv3p}} Les Misrables]]'' is also available. **** ThisTroper's brother performed in a (summer drama program) high school-aged ''[[{{Theatre/ptitlenjisnv3p}} Les Misrables]]''. As near as he could tell, it was fairly accurate and as vulgar as it should have been at times. **** The school version of ''[[{{Theatre/ptitlenjisnv3p}} Les Misrables]]'' is edited for length and songs, not for content. This troper went in to a conservative Catholic school's production rather warily and was greatly amused by the zeal some of the performers took in lounging around in flimsy tart-wear and corsets singing gaily about the life of a seaside prostitute. Completely uncensored. ("Dog Eats Dog" is cut, though, which leaves Thenardier a much more comic character than he otherwise might be. Rather than the kind of man who robs corpses singing about how God is dead.) ** This editor once took part in a high school production of ''MontyPythonAndTheHolyGrail'' in which the director was forced to remove all references to spanking and oral sex. They were promptly replaced with references to Conan O'Brien and Jay Leno. Additionally, the final version featured Lancelot accusing Galahad of "having an excellent fashion sense and making delicious brownies". Interestingly, the lead actor added the exclamation "ballsack" to the end of one of

his lines, which he delivered before a packed audience, and no one seemed to care. *** I just laughed for about 2 minutes straight. * This editor's high school teacher had tried to put on ''The Laramie Project'', a play + video showing [[SomeAnvilsNeedToBeDropped the aftermath of the infamous murder of Matthew Sheppard]], and was promptly axed by the new Principal, claiming it wasn't properly put through the channels so it can be on the calendar. But several students in the Drama class were suspicious when soon after that, all the ''Questionable'' play and monologue books were removed, and they gave the 11th grade English teacher the Drama job, and gave the Drama teacher the English job. ** Did we go to the same school? That is exactly what happened when my class tried to do the play. * At this troper's primary school, TV Tropes was blocked on the internet (yes, I was a Troper then), but {{Cracked}} was fine. At my high school, it's the other way around. * When I was in high school drama, i was put in a group of three and given the assignment of making a short play based around a picture. My group was given a picture showing three World War II-era soldiers toting rifles and eating what looked like beef jerky. We decided to make a parody where the soldiers were instead incompetent traffic cops, who in the end accidentally shoot each other (non-fatally) during a botched rescue attempt. Our drama teacher, concerned about school shootings and their influences, abhorred the idea that we would use guns in our play, and convinced us to bowlderize it into spilling scalding hot coffee onto each other. Particularly stupid when she gave us the picture, with the guns in it, and told us to make a play about it. ** Solution: LampshadeHanging * This troper's high school also tried to put on "The Laramie Project". First it was canceled. Then it was brought back -- but with several non-standard, but okay, features: students had to have parental permission to audition, and time was also scheduled to discuss the play. But, instead of the two weekends the school plays usually run for, the play was only allowed one: Memorial Day Weekend. Nobody turned up. The administration cited low turnout as a reason not to have the normal second week, so the production was still meddled to death. The drama department head quit in disgust and is now suing the school district for creating a hostile work environment. * This troper's former drama teacher attempted to edit a monologue in another language because it contained a word which resembled Fuck, except it wasn't. It was another word in a different foreign language. (M&#257;ori for the record). Overprotective much. * This troper's high school performance of "God" by Woody Allen was heavily censored for sexual content, due to the school being an Orthodox Jewish school. Fortunately, they simply let the drama teacher do the alterations. Most amusingly, the gag where Diabetes tries to kiss Doris, who says no because it's her line, was turned into a running gag and replaced every time they actually kissed. Also, all place names were changed to accommodate the play being performed in Seattle, not New York.

** Wait... How were they advertising the play? As "G* d"? ** If you are referring the very high reverence that the Jewish pay to the name of God, it's not actually the word God that they avoid, but the word Yahweh, the name God revealed for Himself to Moses. *** In fact, it's acceptable to write "Yahweh", as that is a transliteration into English. ** in English, its Jehovah. No need to complicate things. *** The practice of leaving out the "o" in "God" is not a law, just a custom that some follow and others don't. * Averted at this troper's high school, where the administration took pride in being progressive enough to allow a lovely production of both ''The Laramie Project'' and ''Cabaret''. While the fliers for the plays did warn about the content, they weren't bowdlerized. * This troper's high school was scheduled to put on a production of The Children's Hour, a play about gossip, accused homosexuality, and suicide, which was shut down about six weeks in rehearsal by the head nun. The majority of the drama department held a silent protest in the hallway outside her office for one day and succeeded in getting the play back, with the condition of disclaimers and after-show discussions. Despite it, a great deal of bitterness remained in many of the students involved. * This troper heard of a local high school who - because of concerns about Satanic content - reworked the classic musical ''Damn Yankees'' into ''Them Yankees'' and reworked the character Mr. Applegate/The Devil into an unnamed "disreputable business man". ** This Troper attended the performance of his friends' middle school production of Damn Yankees. I was rather surprised when the raunchy stayed in. This included my own friend singing about the naked dame on the train (with nothing in between them cept thin air...) and a... um somewhat... awkward performance where the poor thirteen year old girl Lola did a sufficiently seductive job for me to keep reminding myself [[{{Lolicon}} I don't swing that way.]] * This troper attended a junior college which was notorious for requiring all of the Theater Department's productions to be approved by the college president. According to campus legend, this state of affairs came about after a former college president's VERY religious wife was offended by a production involving an original play featuring homosexual men and AIDS. This lead to some insanely edited productions, including... ** a production of Stephen Sondheim's ''Company'' which removed all references to homosexuality, pot-smoking (though joints were disallowed, the actors were still allowed to perform a scene where the characters get stoned and talk about how stoned they were after the dialogue and props were changed to indicate that they were smoking tobacco in a water pipe) and a song explaining the difference between having sex and making love. ** a production of Jules Tascas ''The Gods Honest, An Evening of Lies: Eight Miniatures to be Played Together or As Individual Pieces'', in which one of the miniature plays - ''The Rape of Emma Bunche'' not only had to have its name changed in the program and advertising to simply ''Emma'' but also had to remove all instances of the word "rape" from the script - which was problematic as the play

centers upon the conversation between a man confronting the woman who may have wrongly accused him of rape after a one-night stand. * This troper's high school was planning to put on a student-written piece titled, "Sex in High School" about...[[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin well, you know.]] A few weeks into rehearsal the administration shut it down for language and sexual content. Even though past performances have included ''Bat Boy: The Musical,'' an uncensored OneFlewOverTheCuckoosNest, and a male equivalent of the Vagina Monologues. * This troper's high school had a theater director who wanted to do ''Urinetown'' for the spring musical. If you're familiar with the play, you know that it's actually fairly clean. However, certain meddling administrators read the name and decided that they didn't like it. The director then proposed a different play, which the administrators quickly accepted. After all, what could be so bad about a play called ''Cabaret''? ** Was that a deliberate revenge shot? If so, I love your director. ** The idea of a high school production of ''Cabaret'' thrills me immensely. And I second the deliberate revenge thing, that might even merit a real life Made of Win. ** ...OR a {{Crowning Moment of Awesome}}. *** A similar situation happened in my school. Our principal disapproved of it simply because of the name...the director then changed the play to ''Some Like It Hot.'' 3 years later (this past Spring), under a new principal and school president, they were able to perform it. * This troper experienced something similar when our high school theater group put on first Our Town and then Sweeney Todd (neither of which are particularly Moral-Guardian friendly). After complaints from parents that the shows were 'not happy enough', school officials ordered our directer to pick something catchy and fun for the next show. The result was a decidedly unexpurgated Cabaret. Hilarity ensued. * When [[RedRajah this troper's]] Catholic high school did "The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie", all mention of nudity was stricken and all mention of sex in the script was changed to "passionate love" despite how stupid it sounded. More egregious was the fact that the director refused to pronounce the [[{{Scotireland}} city Edinburgh]] correctly and insisted that the cast follow his version. Needless to say, this troper's [[ViolentGlaswegian grandfather]] had more than enough reason to be pissed at the idiot. * Subverted: This troper's ecumenical-Christian-might-as-well-beCatholic high school variety show was mostly G-rated, for the tiny tots, but got away with showing a ''lot'' of leg and multiple highkick panty shots in a musical number from ''TheDrowsyChaperone''. It. Was. AWESOME. ** That is very sad. * weeps* * This Troper's high school drama clubs were both notorious for skewering any kind of ExecutiveMeddling thrown at them until the complainer learned to mind their own business. Case in point - a new principal took over in this troper's final semester, and immediately instated a 'curse limit' on all productions. One club's response? Do

the entire thing with RuleOfFunny eighteenth-century curses, save for one [[PrecisionFStrike laser-guided]] [[http://xkcd.com/75/ xkcd quote]]. In a separate incident, she objected to a student singing ''If You Seek Amy'' in a show for the year level, telling the singer she had to edit the titular line. She retaliated by ''singing the actual letters''. * The theater coach at [[{{Xaris}} This Troper's]] high school in his sophomore year was actually FIRED for putting on a show that featured a lesbian as a secondary character where the only references to that character's sexuality were a few friendly jokes from another character. He then proceeded to give every student in his classes A's and tell his students that he doesn't care what they do in them on the basis of "what are they going to do, fire me?". * [[DragonMaster My]] Drama class was getting ready to do it's final runthrough of ''Gum and Goo'' (as well as ''Blue remembered hills'') When our Drama teacher gave the girl playing Michelle some bad news: The headteacher had heard of the play and didn't want small children hearing swear words so she wasn't allowed to say the word "Fuck" in front of the year 8 children watching them and would have to change the line "You fucking copper!". In my mind it just didn't work as well. * This Troper's High School forced the drama club to cut several instances of swearing in the plays they did. Luckily, they weren't reading too closely and everything else got through. This Troper got to personally deliver Anita's innuendo-filled solo in WestSideStory, got bruised in the last (and mildest) fight scene in the former on opening night, got to advise the cast Lola on her bustier in DamnYankees, and starred in a play that involved a rich woman faking her own death and running away with the butler. And "The Game" from Damn Yankees, which is about sex and little else, not only got performed virtually unaltered, but got some unintended accompaniment in some rehearsals from the music director's infant son. * This troper's high school drama program is usually pretty good about this, mostly because we stick to the "classics"-- that is, Shakespeare and almost everything not written by an alum written earlier than 1950. This year, we're doing a series of one-act plays-- with character names changed from the original ("Bimbo" became "Hanger-On", "Drunks" became "Loose Partiers"), dialogue changes (all swearing expunged, or rather, just crossed out, despite being extremely indicative of a character's mental breakdown) and setting updates to make one play more "relevant" despite rendering it impossible to make sense of. One play which is about a fairly G-rated summoning of a spirit (already transparently something of a demon) must have elements that could possibly be mistaken for occult by anyone [[MoralGuardians overly]] [[MoralPanic "sensitive"]] in the audience completely removed. For example, our "magic spell" must not be mystical sounding or sound like real language... or sound too frightening... and the central conceit of how the spirit-summoning takes place (a circle of powder on the ground, to be lit with a match) must be replaced by just saying the magic words and opening the door to have the (friendlier, cheerier) spirit appear. Despite his purpose in the plot being to be a manipulative bastard. Damn it. It makes you wonder why they even

picked out the play in the first place. ** Subverted when I entered a flier a summer art camp production of IntoTheWoods(which was already the Bowdlerized junior version). I entered a piece that I never expected to win: [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel a drawing of the Wolf, more realistic and vicious than before, about to strike]] (and possibly eat...[[FateWorseThanDeath or worse]]) [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel a screaming Little Red Riding Hood(reflected in the wolf's eye)]]. It looked more like a poster for a horror film than one for a [[TastesLikeDiabetes sickeningly sweet]] musical(although that's not to say the original was so sweet either). I didn't win for completely different reasons- I got the title wrong by ONE WORD (I simply put "Into The Woods", without the Junior part, partially due to the fact that it [[NightmareRetardent detracted]] from the [[{{Grimmification}} grimmified]] tone of the whole thing, and the fact that it sounded patently ridiculous) * A line in a student-written play at [[TheTallOne my brother's]] Catholic, nun-run school was changed from "Stick it where the sun don't shine" to the altogether less offensive, "Place it where the sun don't shine." Fortunately, the actor was able to deliver the line with enough gusto, it wasn't too horrendously stupid-sounding. * On the other hand, this troper's highschool performed {{Equus}}. * [[{{Katfairy}} This Troper]] was in a production of {{Hair}} which was {{bowdlerized}} out of necessity for the most part. The song "Colored Spade" was cut because there wasn't a single black person in the cast. (This was in Maine in the 80s; not exactly racially diverse.) We cut "Sodomy" because half our funding would have been lost if we kept it in. We cut the nudity because we had a 13-year-old cast member; we ended up being ''very'' glad we did, since the performance was in January, there was a very rickety loading door at the back of the stage, and night-time temperatures went down below -20 before factoring in the wind chill. Possibly the only production of the show where the hippies wore longjohns under their filmy cotton outfits. Still, last night of the show, we got together after most of the audience was gone and sang the missing songs at the top of our lungs. * This troper's high school was torn between two different one-act plays. One was a play about the right for black children to be educated, the other a play called "Camel Lot", which was (in universe) the result of an IncrediblyLamePun. We chose the latter, because the theater teacher was worried about offending people, as one of the lines was "Black people don't need education". * An aversion so incredible, I had to share it. A complete, uncut production of ALittleNightMusic in a public high school that was not censored even when people walked out during the intermission. Only one change was made by the administrators: when a youth and his maid were discussing the fact that he had ejaculated prematurely during their attempt at sex, the maid could only zip up his pants instead of zipping up his pants and patting him on the crotch reassuringly as she had in previous performances. [[AC:Other]]

* This Troper was actually forbidden to bring up any references to religion during an A.P. Human Geography course. He had sparked a debate with the teacher over the differences between Christianity, Judaism, and Islam, and was forbidden to correct the man ever again. * Here's a real wall banger: at [[GwenStacyWannabe this troper]]'s high school, we had a Battle of the Genders week. That's right: the administration wouldn't let us call it "Battle of the Sexes" ''even though we were using it in the proper context''. Our school is...special. ** I take it we mean "pencils up the nose" special? * During this troper's senior year, the tradition of football players dressing in cheerleader drag for the Powder Puff game was forbidden due to one teacher's complaints of sexism. They still did a routine as "The P.C. Powder Puff Squad," but it wasn't the same... ** The same thing was banned at this troper's high school for nearly ''twenty years.'' It was only recently reinstated--provided the football players only did a cheer and didn't actually dress in drag. * This Troper grew up in a conservative, bible-belt town. I was on the school newspaper staff for a few years. Only three of my articles were published, not because they were bad, but because most had 'material to that some might consider objectionable'. One article was about bullying. It mentioned homosexuality in the form of a hypothetical lesbian girl who suffered discrimination. There were several hypothetical people: someone of a non-Christian religion, someone who had a learning disorder, and one or two other people, all which I made clear were hypothetical. I also mentioned that in real life gay people and people belonging to certain religious groups were sometimes physically harmed. The teacher insisted on running the article without the references to homosexuality against my objections. I didn't want it run if she was going to edit what I considered an important part of it. In a subversion, someone made a mistake in the editing room and my article was ran without the edits my teacher had ordered. I had nothing to do with it, but I was very happy and proud. Of course, after that, I was subtly forbidden from having anymore articles of mine published, but still. * In our high school our literary magazine had pages literally cut out of them because of the so called violence contained in it. Needless to say the editorial of the said magazine (with my friend being the headeditor) were incredibly pissed off. * A university magazine in our area had a picture of a nude woman in a tasteful, nothing-showing pose on the front cover. It was physically cut out for indecency...revealing, on the second page, another nude model in a slightly different tasteful, nothing-showing pose, which was left alone. Still haven't figured that one out. * This troper's ex is ''not'' a fan of her home country's MoralGuardians, the more fanatical of whom tend to inhabit a certain radio station that shall remain nameless, to the point of almost being a BerserkButton. The troper happened to be in the car with her when she drove past one of said radio station's advertising boards, and she launched into a half-hour rant on the subject that hit every point on their Wikipedia page's (extensive) criticism section and more. * This Troper was the deputy head prefect of his Australian public

(i.e., government run) school and as such had to sit on the school's governing council. Whilst in this role, he witnessed a (Evangelical) member attempt to install a 'compliancy committee' to audit the behaviour of both students and teachers. This troper, the principal and the deputy principal quickly cut him off. * This Troper's little bio in the program for a middle school play was censored; she had added a funny quote to the end of the blurb (from a Shakespeare parody). It originally read "If we shadows have offended, think but this and all is ended: that you fell asleep on your butt and dreamed the whole thing." Final version of the program rolls off the presses with the phrase "on your butt" (and therefore a large chunk of the humor) removed. ** Animaniacs reference? * [[TromboneChild This Troper's]] aunt excuses my cousins from class (and maybe even takes them out of school) on the days that their classes watch things she deems "inappropriate," like the puberty video. But the best had to be another aunt and uncle who didn't tell their children that my aunt was going to have a baby until either days before or until the baby was already out--is it me, or does that seem like ''too'' much protection? ** Where do they tell their children babies come from, then? The ''stork?'' ** Better question: if they're so concerned about the "objectionable material" being taught in public schools, then ''[[FridgeLogic why don't they homeschool their children?]]'' * My family are usually fine with me playing violent games and stuff, but however when I played ''MetalGearSolid'' and got to the "Hold me Snake!" scene with Mantis and Meryl my parents got concerned. Thankfully nothing happened but they were seriously considering it. * Remember the children's book, ''Where the Wild Things Are''? Yeah, there are apparently groups out there trying to get this book banned because they feel that the imagery is too "frightening" and "intense" for young children. Funny, this troper doesn't remember ever being afraid of it when she was a small child. ** [[http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/blogs/sfmoms/detail?entry_id=49362 Maurice Sendak responds]]: "[[CrowningMomentOfAwesome I would tell them to go to hell.]]" *** They think that's scary, and yet, we have NightmareFuel. * If you have worked in customer service, no matter how innocuous that service is, you have probably met some people who fancy themselves this. This troper had a friend who once worked in a bicycle store. The entire staff had to sit through a talk by the owner about "appropriate language" after someone complained that she had overheard the friend talking to a customer about his butt. The friend was advising the customer on the subject of buying a saddle. * This troper's parents usually ban her from watching any movie that she deems interesting (aka rated 'R' for non-violent reasons). So, instead, she goes over to her friend's house and watches it there. Her friends are basically inverse moral guardians. * I've a couple stories about moral guardians...This first is about a drama festival that my school participates in. The show a year ago, for which I was involved with, was not allowed to move on in the

competition. It was based on the life of Jim Morrison, and as such, involves a rock star becoming addicted to drugs, etc. After the first public performance, people went ''RIGHT UP TO THE PRINCIPAL'' and complained that it "promoted drug use" (it did quite the opposite; the main character's girlfriend left him, his groupie, and, although his band (barely) didn't leave him, the manager DID get his exgirlfriend), and so it was cancelled. Never mind that the only explicit, inappropriate conduct was a scene that led up to--but didn't finish with--oral sex. And the girl was fine with it! And her parents were (kinda) fine with it! * My second is about my drama teacher, who completely subverts MoralGuardian. Hell, he even applauds ideas involving themes like internal (Gods damn you, RougeAnglesOfSatin!!!) ''Eternal'' damnation, and two (grade ten) students doing a piece which plays out like the intro to soft(almost ''hard''--pun intended!)-core porn!!! * This troper's camp regularly [[{{Macekre}} Macekres]] their plays, even HighSchoolMusical. But the worst was when they made a play of StarWars, and cut out [[spoiler:Darth Vader's death]]. * This troper hates that self-proclaimed so-called moral guardians are associated with conservative Christians. He is a conservative Christian and hates moral guardians, and hates even more being associated with them. [[BerserkButton Please don't do it.]] That is all. ** It is not that conservative Christians are being singled out as the only MoralGuardians, but many MoralGuardians ''are'' conservative Christians, and they frequently use their beliefs as justification. Hence the flak. *** Same troper here. Are we all forgetting about the atheists who want to ban all religious references from the airwaves and the liberals who scream "think of the children" even when the target audience doesn't include children? Not to mention PoliticalCorrectnessGoneMad and the StrawmanPolitical? **** "the liberals who scream "think of the children" " Wat? Um, I think you're mixed up. We are the ones who tell those assholes to shut the fuck up, not the ones doing the screaming. **** Same replying troper here. Maybe I didn't phrase that very well, but I wasn't trying to single out anyone in particular, I happen to think that all MoralGuardians are as bad as each other regardless of which side of the political/religious spectrum they come from. I do know that for every JackThompson you get you're likely to get a Joe Liebermann as well... *** Amen brother! I'm a conservative, and even I hate moral guardians. Do you know what I do when I feel offended by someone else's work? I JUST LEAVE THE DAMN PLACE! and that's all! Let the people decide what they want to see (But then again, I support gay marriage and I think creationism is ridiculous...Yes, I'm special) *** Gotta put my $0.02 in here now. I'm an old-school conservative... hell, I'll go beyond that, I'm a Foundationist (Meaning that I believe that the Constitution should be adhered to as WRITTEN and AMENDED, not "interpreted"). I believe that there should be LESS government regulation, not more. Censorship, to me, is an abhorrent affront to the First Amendment, and frankly I hate the fact that Congress or

anyone else seems to think they can have a say in what people watch or listen to. It should be the parents - not the government - that says "Think of the Children." The Constitution was written in a very specific way, and to think people are trying to twist it to their own purposes is... to me, it's just like trying to twist the Bible to their own purposes. And the fact that censorship is being "blamed" on Conservatives obviously don't know what the hell a real conservative is all about. *** Marry me! (It's OK if you're a guy, I'm the conservative who supports gay rights) *** I love you all! Seriously, thanks for FINALLY stating not every conservative Christian is a moral guardian. *** Let's just go on record and say that, regardless of your political leaning, you're an idiot if you can't just step up and be a parent rather than rely on the FCC and such to do the work for you. That's it. Conservative or liberal, I'm sure if you're in here, you can agree on this. ;-) *** Just remember: For every village, there is an idiot. *** I'll go a step further with each of you. I'm a Conservative ROMAN CATHOLIC who routinely browses the interwebs and find NO PROBLEM with things like South Park, Anime, and Video Games. Granted, there IS such a thing as 'going to far', but I don't make a stink about it. And every time someone does, I would like to put my foot through their face. * This troper's mother was on the school conicle when her older sister was in high school. A mother wanted to ban horror books from the library, so each parent was given a horror short story book to read; her mother's was "Short and Shivery", which is basically a collection of creepy international Folk Tales. The illustrations were harmless, and most of the stories featured skeletons; all the parents ended up agreeing that horror books are are okay, and they're still available to read at her school library. * Adverted for one event in [[{{Kaizykat}} This Troper's]] (hard core MoralGuardians) Catholic school. I am, of course, talking about the King of Hearts competition. The whole premise behind it was to get male students to dress in drag and participate in a beauty competition. It went horribly (And I mean that as a good thing) wrong when one of the contestant's talent was getting on stage and shaking his ass to "Get Busy" by Sean Paul. Needless to say, we may not be having the competition next year... * ThisTroper's high school gave ''suspensions'' to same-sex couples showing any kind of affection in the hallway. Straight couples? ''Didn't get punished at all''. ** That's a lawsuit right there on grounds of discrimination. ** I was actually suspended for kissing my boyfriend unlike the straight couple caught in the back of a car in the school parking lot. Catholic school is just the best. ** As someone who's not exactly in favor of gays, even I say that's unfair! ** You should have used my old stand-by. Tell the school board to do something with the threat of going to the news otherwise. It works for me.

* This troper's 10th grade English teacher gave us debate assignments halfway through the year, with the guidelines that you couldn't choose something controversial like abortions or gay marriage. A few of the kids really wanted to do those topics, though, so the teacher eventually gave in on the condition that there would be no fighting or getting angry. A friend's mother heard about the gay marriage bit and ''flipped''. She emailed the teacher, principal, and super-intendent ''extremely'' nasty letters, and essentially stated that said English teacher was a horrible person and sucked at teaching and demanded that her daughter be taken out of the debates because children 'our age' shouldn't be discussing such things. Keep in mind that I said we were in tenth grade. 16 years old. Her daughter was ''very'' angry with her (she doesn't share her views) and tried to convince the teacher to let her stay, but she was taken out of the class for three days while they debated. The teacher was afraid of doing anything out of line for the rest of the year. * In This Troper's history class, the teacher normally gets the discussion started by assigning a group of students (or in my case, a student), to do a presentation regarding the country/group/era concerned. This Troper was assigned Germany for his presentation, and presented it for approval. The teacher than asked me to edit out all the Nazi references in the part about World War II and the year preceding it, because she was afraid it would "inspire the rest of the class to follow their examples". ** Inverted somehow in my school: The assignment was to do a presentation about different countries (Germany included) and it was NOTHING but Nazi stuff, including a girl dressed as a SS Officer...To this Sephardic Jew troper, see Nazi memorabilia in the school was...Creepy *** Really? Because it's, well, you know, FAKE! She wasn't REALLY a Nazi! ** To original troper: It would be different if your teacher thought it would offend people, but if she thinks hearing about the Nazis will ''convert your class to their beliefs'', then I think that says more about [[CompleteMonster your class]] than the teacher. * Wonderfully averted at this lurker's school. You can pretty much get away with any content in a play because the Headmaster is ''terrified'' of the head of the Drama department, who happens to be into 'they'll learn about it [sex, drugs, violence] eventually - might as well teach them on stage instead of the streets'. And over six feet tall. And a former body builder. Also, this lurker's Classical Civilisation teacher is always peppering his lectures with lewd jokes and hilariously over the top language. They can't fire him because he's the only teacher for the subject. ** This Troper's Classical Civilisation teacher is a lot like that. He's also a eccentric. He sometimes puts his chair up on his desk and sits in it, and issues a weekly word puzzle to the rest of the staff. But he's retiring this year. D: * This troper was part of an "underground" school newspaper during her last year of high school. Because we weren't affiliated with the school (technically), the school administrators couldn't censor us, but it's not like they didn't try. Also, that was the year a nearby

school newspaper, one of the few that could still publish whatever they wanted, lost its first-amendment rights for publishing a controversial article. ** Huh, that wouldn't happen to be SHS would it? *** Nope, my school was a CHS and the one that got in trouble was a PHS. * This troper's school recently got rid of a popular club on campus. They were the Cheerboys, in other words, guys who dressed up in shortshorts and crop tops and did humorous (and admittedly rather suggestive) dances at assemblies and half time, sort of as {{Fanservice}} aimed at girls in addition to cheerleaders for the guys. They were not cut for this, but for apparently mocking the gay lifestyle. * This fifteen-year-old troper's parents think that most PG-13 movies are inappropriate for her (although her thirteen-year-old sister is allowed to watch anything she is, which is just not fair). Never mind that this troper can hear worse things in the lunch room. Never mind that she often tells them that she knows the swear words and that-shocker!-- [[spoiler: sex exists. Unmarried people have it]]. No, if it can't be discussed in front of my grandmother, it doesn't exist as far as I'm concerned. * A few of this troper's classmates got in trouble back in high school for plastering a great deal of drawn phalluses all over the place. Predictably, it didn't go over well. * When This Troper was in middle school, the [[DeanBitterman principal]] got angry at people wearing hats backwards which apparently indicated they were gangsters. Worse, she once yelled at a group of kids playing tug of war because it had "war" in its name. ** Solution: Change the name to "[[BeastWars tugsies]]". * This Troper was never introduced to {{Harry Potter}} at her school. It wasn't even stocked in the library. The reason? Because it contained magic. This Troper had to laugh at the irony that, within a few years, despite the school's determination to shelter us from fake magic, almost 80% of This Troper's grade wound up incorporating various levels of Wicca and other forms of spell-casting practices into their lives, including casting magic at school. (This Troper may or may not have started that trend on purpose). * [[@/PentiumMMX2 This troper's]] mom was one of these when he was younger, although compared to one of his coworkers, she was far more lenient on what was considered acceptable. I can understand my coworker not wanting her young kids to watch shows like TwoAndAHalfMen, but she described the content she found objectionable in a way that made it sound far worse than it really was; to put it lightly, it supposedly made ItsAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphia look as wholesome and family-friendly as HappyDays. * This troper's high school has a parent trying to ban Laurie Halse Anderson's "Twisted" from the entire school corporation after her son read in class, on the grounds that the lead character contemplates suicide and notices girls have breasts. Never mind that it's a story about a boy who makes all the right decisions in a horrible situation; what makes this truly stupid is that half the classics in the school library have far more objectionable content.

* This 19 year old troper's parents ban him from playing games such as ''GrandTheftAuto'' and ''SaintsRow'' as well as listening to gangsta rap music. Don't think that stops him from sneaking said "offensive material" into the house and hiding it where they won't look. * For a little while, we couldn't play almost anything at my elementary school because one mother went crazy about a "rule" that stated that children were not allowed to touch each other. No football, basketball, not even tag. *** I feel you. This grown up adult, young adult, adult shaped, adult of a troper, aged 19 has to deal with that crap at her transition to work facility. (Not naming any names) We're all over the age of 18, accidents would happen, but That Is Life. We're not violent people anyway (Minus the careless sociopath). Besides the fact tht it would never happen because we respect each other (Minus the sociopath) and yeah We. Are. Adults. (Minus the sociopath) Fuck it. My "Teacher" gets really mad sometimes if we touch each other just a little bit too long or too heavily. (I mean friendlily putting one persons legs on top of each other as a display of affection, nothing sexual or violent about that, or even poking each other in a talking communication way gets stressed looks). It still didn't stop a perve (The sociopath) doing perverted things in public and people being sexually harrassed (By the sociopath). I'd rather have a no violence, no sexual harrassment/actions, respect everybody thing. Over that CRAPPPPPPPPPP! We Are ADULTS! Dammit. *** (Same troper) In his defence, there is only one guy who should not be allowed near humans: the token sociopath who takes pleasure from tormenting people and being irritating and thinks girls are objects and gets off when you smile at him by accident (and you know the feeling of power of making somebody irritated with you and move away from you). He should be banned from touching, harrassing, inappropriately placing his body next to another students body and generally being an arrogant kcockhead who thinks he invented breathing and is the only person in the whole entire world (which counts). That Is Life..but the rest of us are perfectly, fine, sane, sympathetic, empathetic human beings, who communicate normally and care about each other standardly and are nice in our own special ways and respect each other. **** (Same Troperrrr) The teacher's favourite is in fact the sociopath, in an ironic twist you totally saw coming. That Is Life. * This troper's mother was one of these. She banned me and my siblings from watching {{Arthur}} because DW was being bratty, StaticShock because a kid brought a gun to school (even though it was a VerySpecialEpisode ''against'' gun violence), walked out on ThePacifier because of (again) bratty kids, (initially) banned us from reading {{Bionicle}} comics because they were described as "mystical," and is of the belief that we should never watch anything that we would not show to a five-year-old. She also believed that all video games were MurderSimulators, only recanting that view when she played WiiPlay at a friend's house. She also wants to screen all the movies we bring home. The last straw was when she saw the ''cover'' of LiarLiar and declared it off-limits. After that, we just watched them in our rooms without showing them to her. Don't get me wrong. I love

the woman to death, but I'm afraid to show her anything for fear she get offended, because when she gets mad, [[YouWouldntLikeMeWhenImAngry she gets]] ''[[YouWouldntLikeMeWhenImAngry really]]'' [[YouWouldntLikeMeWhenImAngry mad]]. ** How are you allowed to type this, she sounds like she wouldn't allow access to the internet. ** Her "Guardian-ness" has slackened off in the last few years as, with all three siblings either in college or having their driver's licences, she realizes there isn't a lot she can do to stop us. And we tend to operate under a YouDidntAsk routine. * Here in Florida, the Hillsborough County school system just banned Augusten Burroughs' ''Running With Scissors'' in two high schools, and the rest either have warning stickers or require signed parental permission to borrow. The Riverview HS [[MoralGuardians panel]] commented that "There are no good guys in this book. There's a corrupt doctor. No one at the boy's school, no grownup at all, helped this child. So we felt there was no need to keep the book," and regarding the antagonists, there is "a total lack of negative consequences throughout the book." Keep in mind, this book is a '''''[[CompletelyMissingThePoint memoir]]''''', as clearly labeled on the front cover and multiple times inside. One of the [[MoralGuardians people]] who called for the ban said, "If children want to read about an abusive mother, they should read ''Mommie Dearest'' instead." Well, ''Mommie Dearest'' is indeed still on school shelves. As is that seminal child abuse classic, ''A Child Called It'', plus ''{{Lolita}}'' and ''CatcherInTheRye''. Way to go, guys. A number of students have questioned the banning as being [[UnfortunateImplications rooted in homophobia]]. * [[{{Hertzyscowicz}} This Troper]] was once told off in a seventhgrade art class for drawing a person smoking a cigarette in the same room with a child. For the record, that (smoking in the same room as a child) ''is'' illegal in Finland. I ended up ruining the drawing by adding a door to the picture, so that the child would technically be in another room. * This Troper attended a Christian elementary school. Our librarian was...quite the Moral Guardian. She didn't allow any sort of fantasy whatsoever, except (if I recall correctly) ''TheChroniclesOfNarnia''. Not even ''TheLordOfTheRings'' made it in (despite Tolkien being the one who converted C.S. Lewis to Christianity). She also whited out any swearing she found in books, and a reference to a ghost on a poster illustrating some literary term. She was eventually succeeded by This Troper's mother, an avid fantasy reader who, shall we say, made up for lost time. * My friend, back in high school, had the wrath of our English teacher brought upon him. He was, according to her, viewing 'lewd, disgusting material', that was 'corrupting the mind of other innocent students'. The material: A picture of two male anthro foxes hugging/kissing. 2 days later another kid was busted with hardcore porno, while he was masturbating. IN CLASS. The teacher didn't actually catch him in the act, just with the porn. He got 2 lunchtime detentions for 'possessing inappropriate material'. My friend got suspended, and almost expelled. According to my older brother, who had her previously, she is a

notorious homophobe. He got lucky and transferred out of her class. I was stuck with her for another five months. ** But if he was... How... How can no one notice a guy mas-... Didn't anyone freak out... I-I mean how can anyone not see...[[{{YourHeadAsplode}} AAAAAAARRRGGGHHH!]] * My high school has some pretty nonsensical rules concerning what the students should be allowed to do "morally". We can't show our shoulders or have holes in our jeans (even at the knee) because it will cause naughty sexual thoughts that children our age (15-18) shouldn't have. Also, my 10th grade English teacher seemed bent on making sure my class had Christian values, to the point where she sent out permission slips to parents to make sure that it would be okay to talk about different religious views in her class room. I didn't matter much since she would tack on, "Now isn't that weird/wacky/crazy/strange?" whenever she talked about things like atheism and Peaganism and whatnot to drive the point home. * In junior high, I was on the school newspaper, and wrote a pretty in-depth article about {{Bowdlerization}} in the anime industry (which was rampant at the time, about five or six years ago). I kind of had to mention sexuality - hell, I had a whole section on [[SailorMoon Haruka and Michiru]] - as it was one of the things most commonly taken out of edited anime. The newspaper adviser told me to take out all the references to sex, as they were inappropriate for a junior-high aged audience. Yes, my article on censorship... [[CompletelyMissingThePoint was censored]]. * As a (Dutch) librarian I come across people who routinely will complain to me about us having (adult) video games, (adult) comics and (adult) movies in the ADULTS SECTION where kids could get them. These items are blocked on your library card if you do not have the appropiate age (required by law these days). Exceptions are: you need the material for school (mostly informative books or literature, sometimes classic/adapted movies and schools tend to give us pointers on what projects they have) or your parent/guardian gave permission (in person) to put it on their card. So if your kid has gotten it's hands on a 16+ horror movie or videogame from the library and you are complaining about it's availability, remember: This means you gave permission or they somehow needed it for class. The other option is that they stole it from us. * This troper's school blocks certain sites from being accessed by their students, such as Facebook, My Space, TV Tropes (much to my anger) and YouTube. Everyone hates this. Fun fact: this troper found out by a few experiments that you can get onto YouTube if you know how, and the school doesn't block a variety of forums or '''4chan'''. Yep. *** Oh, you can add Twitter, adultfanfiction.net and fanfiction.net to that list of sites it doesn't block. :) Although one wall banger--the computers block TheNostalgiaChick's section of the That Guy With The Glasses site, but not the site itself. This troper is still pissed. ** This has recently come up as a topic of discussion at college, the problem is of course that these sites can be used for slacking off, they can also be used for getting new information or having a meaningful conversation. IT has made the sensible decision not to

block the sites, since profs and teachers are using the sites as well nowadays, it's probably for the best. ** Also, this troper has found it quite hilarious that the school he went to was trigger happy with the blocking, yet the one thing they left untouched? Porn. Especially of the furry variety. ** Our school has just gone nuts with the site blocker. Blocking porn? Perfectly understandable, it's a highschool after all. Blocking a website because it has risque content? A little overkill, but seems fair. Blocking a site because it uses the word breast on a freaking ''breast cancer website''. Pointless and stupid. Blocking a website that lets you play as a cute little penguin who collects snowballs with his sweet little friends? ''What. The. Hell?'' *** During a short stint as a systems/network administrator at a high school, our policy ended up being "no filtering, let the teachers walk around and tell us about suspect behaviour" since we found out the hard way that simply filtering stuff would accomplish 2 things: 1: Teachers would blame us for kids slacking off in class by visiting non-blocked websites. Preferring to sit behind the desk and not actually try to maintain order, and 2: A lot of kids failing a class because they couldn't finish their projects due to inaccessible websites needed for them. ** [[{{Tropers/ptitlepgy6ymio}} 0dd1]]: In my school, the people in charge of blocking access to certain sites are notoriously narcissistic (the man in charge calls himself Commander--well, I won't give the full name, but he thinks he's a spaceman and actually makes each of the blocking messages begin thusly: "FAIL!!"), the filters target not only video and social networking sites (except Twitter, bizarrely) but also downloaded video games, AIM, {{Cracked}}, the search term "flash games" (as well as the word "game" in a webpage's name for some time) and at one point TheOtherWiki (for no apparent reason), and the students are notorious for constantly finding ways around the filters. Most of the time it's proxy websites we use to get around the filters, so there was a ban on the instance of the word "proxy" as well. [[HilarityEnsues Hilarity ensued]] when my group in my psychology class had to research Munchausen's by-proxy for a project as a result. *** In [[@/{{endlessness}} This Troper]]'s university, one of the computer labs blocks Twitter, Facebook, online games and most music/video streaming webpages. So far, so good. But... porn and most "warez" web pages are not blocked: one can easily download torrents from there - thus resulting in the university receiving a lot of DMCA notices, or at least hog up the entire bandwidth of the lab, or spend all his day watching porn. It used to be worse: the word "game" was blocked in all URLs, so you wanted to search about 'game theory' or 'game development'? Sorry for you. * Completely and 100% averted by this troper(I/me)'s mother who, among other things, explained sex to me when I was nine, and not only allowed me to but actively made sure I go to school on days when puberty and sex was discussed; mostly because her own parents were Moral Guardians themselves and she didn't want to be like that with me since she believes their actions are the root of her psychological problems. She's implied that my dad might've played this straight

though were he still alive, though more in regards to how I dress (jeans, band t-shirts, no make-up, a lot of black/dark colors) than anything else. ** This troper's got you one better. My mom has always been of the "If they ask a question, answer honestly" variety, so I got the full "where babies come from" discussion at three. I also got discussions on "unusual" (i.e. not white picket fence, ma and pa and 2.5 kids from TV) relationships all throughout my life, culminating in my mom coming out when I was in high school. Though she was a little censor-y about some things (Beevis and Butthead, Ren and Stimpy, fighting games, Rugrats...) * When This Troper was in highschool, all higher up faculty members (read: not teachers) would make me take off my bandana, which was rolled up and used as a headband (I have long hair, it helps keep it out of my face). Apperently, as a guy with a headband I must be a gang member, but the scores of girls with headbands and bandanas in a more 'gangster' style can't be. Blech. I was fine while I was in my classes though. * This Troper was so angered with MoralGuardians that he considered them as TheScrappy of the universe. Okay, He doesn't hate moral guardians that much, but this troper will ''snap'' if something gets BannedInChina because of the moral guardians. Here is how he scales MoralGuardians: Blocking NSFW such as FourChan and Encyclopedia Dramatica? That's fine with him. Blocking porn? Fine. Blocking games? Fine. Blocking Wikipedia, Yahoo, Google, TV Tropes, and other harmless websites? [[{{Understatement}} Not. fine. at. all.]] * This troper lives in Colorado. Specifically, a place so full of StrawmanPolitical types you'd assume you walked into a farm field, including a lot of walking StrawHypocrite types, too. If you ever mentioned how many ''books'' or old movies contain violence, sex, or swearing as opposed to these Video games (of which they ''obviously'' have never even seen more than the box art at '''''MOST'''''), they'd automatically dismiss it and say that it wasn't teaching kids to act up in school. They thought columbine was caused by ''Doom'', and are ''so'' dumb, I could tell them I spent my entire weekend reading ''DragonQuestIX'' and they'd congratulate me on spending my weekend productively - never mind that ''DragonQuestIX'' is a ''game''. * This troper's sister forced her to remove all the tastefully done photographs and drawings of the nude or mostly-naked or not-mostlynaked-but-provocative women on her blog because she considered them to be "tacky", "trashy", "tasteless", etc., etc. Because everybody knows that showing yourself naked or in sexual positions makes you trashy and worthless, without regard for the idea that the human body is a beautiful thing and nothing to be ashamed of. ** I hate it when people do that. There is classy and even worthwhile sexy/sensualness. It exists. ** How exactly did she manage to ''force'' you to remove something from your ''blog''? In an age where many adults are informed about Milgram's experiments etc. one would expect such peer pressure to push the BerserkButton instead... * At this Troper's old high school, our newspaper published a very tasteful story talking about sexual trends among the student body.

Instead of using the article as a jumping-off point to talk to their kids, a small group of parents (his fanatically Evangelical Christian one of them) decided that they would make it their personal mission to ruin the editor in chief's scholastic career. By the end of the year, the majority of the staff was suspended and barred from the newspaper, the editor was expelled, and the journalism teacher was fired. Additionally, multiple new clauses were added to the contract that all clubs and organizations had to sign to become officially sponsored, allowing for stricter control over content by the school board. For writing an article CONDEMNING students who performed sexual acts on school grounds. Buh-duh-wha? * [[{{SubvertedTrope}} Subverted]] by my 6th Grade English teacher, who made us research the play Romeo and Juliet without any changes and even made us research it in Old English. The aforementioned Old English was not [[{{YeOldeButcheredeEnglishe}} butchered]], as you might have expected. * This troper was looking for articles for her research paper on role models (which is a hive for MoralGuardians anyways) and she came across an article that was worried about impressionable nineteen-yearolds. That's right, '''impressionable nineteen-year-olds'''. This troper was in shock for a whole minute. ** [[SarcasmMode Well, at the tender age of nineteen, such young children are so easily influenced]]! * This troper's father won't let her go to her friend's homes because he believes that their parents will give her drugs and alcohol. * [[FabianCH This troper]]'s home country recently classified airsoft guns as real weapons. Also, there is a strong movement seeking to ban the sport altogether, because it violates "human dignity". I happen to think that, ironically, it violates my own dignity for someone else to tell me what I can and cannot do with it. And I don't even play airsoft. * This troper once wrote an editorial in his Intro to Journalism class about a school PSA that involved a condom and was therefore banned by the principal. I took the negative stance, saying that it was stupid that parents try and censor issues that are very real and on the news every day, plus the fact that the video was warning ''against'' sex without protection. I ended it by saying "This is high school, not some kindergarten class where a kid will raise their hand and ask 'Teacher, what's sex?' * If I may add my story(s): ** It's halloween, and despite it only being a harmless decoration, I have been informed that no, I cannot hang a noose from the tree in my front yard, because apparently any reference to hanging is automaticly refering to hanging black people, which makes no sense whatsoever. PoliticalCorrectnessGoneMad much? ** As a kid, my mom refused to let me watch Spongebob and the fairly Oddparents because "the people in it aren't nice to eachother." No, thats seriously the reason she gave. *** People in my family aren't nice to eachother, and nobody censored me from them! Seriously, [[CaptainObvious mean people exist in the world]]. I can think of better reasons to bar my kids from watching those shows.

** My school drama department averts this though. We've gotten away with uncensored versions of Sweet Charity and The Producers. * This troper has made it his first priority, to, after successfully becoming a supervillain, see if a microwave ray could be focused to make some of the slightly more obnoxious Moral Guardians' heads asplode. * Completely averted with [[Tropers/EarthboundGod this Tropers]] parents. The first PG-13 I ever watched was '''[[AceVentura Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls]]''' while my mom was in the room, and I was about ten at the time. Also, she would read to me and my sister when we were younger. The series? HarryPotter. They also don't mind about what games I play or think that manga is the 'spawn of the devil'. There was a small instance where my mom bought me the first novel for TrueBlood and she took it away for a bit to see if it was 'appropriate for me to read', but I brushed it off since she's a fan of vampires and wanted to read it. Then she informed me that there were graphic sex scenes and bisexual vampires (which didn't [[YaoiFangirl bother me that much]]), but she finally let me read it when I turned eighteen by saying that I should be mature enough to read things like that. ...Thing is, I ''hate'' sex scenes so damn much. Oh well. ** You should have convinced her that you weren't really any different at 17 and 11 months then you were at 18, and read it right before you turned 18. ** Or you could have read it secretly before you were eighteen. If your library is anything like mine, you can borrow books and not even your parents can access your borrowing records, even while you are still a minor. Or you could have bought it after school and smuggled it home in your backpack. * In middle school, everyone's favorite game to play at recess was Mafia. When the vice principal found out, he made us change the name of the game to Italians. The UnfortunateImplications did not fail to reach a single one of us. ** And when our English teacher found out about ''The Golden Compass'' (this was around the time the movie was being released), she urged us all not to see it, because of its *gasp* atheist themes. Naturally, a lot of us who previously didn't care about it immediately decided "holy shit we need to see this movie". * This troper's high school had to take down a "winter tree" that was decorated with the school colors with no references to Christianity at all. Because one or two people said it made them uncomfortable, for God knows what reason. Pine trees = Jesus now, apparently. ** Christmas trees...aren't even Christian, or related to the Nativity Story. Dendrophobia? * One of this troper's English (foreign language here) teachers in high school tried, not very successfully, to impose politically correct language in class. Her credibility wasn't helped by the fact that I and at least 2-3 classmates knew English better than her (though she wasn't bad). Still, I [[DethroningMomentOfSuck didn't swear within her earshot]]. * I asked for, and got, TheShining for Christmas. My mom confiscated the book. ''On the same day.'' (Sure, maybe I was a little young, but

she could have waited until the 26th.) * At my middle school, we did an assignment/contest in art class. There was an art contest coming up where we had to make a Westernthemed picture, and the teacher decided to make the theme an assignment. So everyone does their picture, and it turns out, guns had to be censored, so people either had to black them out of their drawing or I guess put a piece of paper over it. That would kind of suck if the gun was prominent in your drawing. * At my high school, we have a few religious clubs. Early in the year the Christian club got permission to have a prayer meet-up at the front of the building before classes started. The Muslim club wanted to do their own prayer meetup. They ask the higher-ups for permission, and they were denied because said higher-ups thought it would cause "too much trouble" and "make people uneasy". DoubleStandard, much? * This troper's old high school had a system that blocked certain websites on school grounds, as I'm sure most schools do. Thing was though, the school librarians were the ones who decided what was and was not appropriate, and constantly monitored the sites everyone went to. I once followed a comic site/blog, the creator being a lesbian. She never said anything horribly graphic about sex or anything like that, her comics were PG-rated and on her blog, the ''most'' she would say about her love life was that she'd gone on a "date" (her way of phrasing it) with her girlfriend. That was ''all.'' After about two weeks, the website was blocked at school because of, and I quote, "Promoting a more adult, alternative lifestyle." [[FlatWhat What.]] * This troper was kept from watching ''OutlawStar'' when he was in second grade by his mother. Keep in mind I'd watched ''DragonBallZ'' without batting an eye. * When this troper was a kid, his mother banned he and his sisters from saying The S Word. What word, you ask? Stupid. ** I hear you man. When I was little, there was a 'bad word' for the whole frickin' alphabet. For nostalga's sake, here's the list: Aside from the obvious "regular swears," there was another 'B-word' (bastard), 'C-word,' ('''crap'''), any variant of "friggin" or "freakin," hell, idiot (no, really), ''jerk'' was a bad word, moron, piss, stupid, shut up, and I think a few other ones too. Of course, I was like 4-5-ish, but '''still!''' ** Feel for you guys too. My mom banned the word "heck" from our house. ''Heck''. ** Well, my mom banned the word ''"devil"'''. [[NotMakingUpThisDisclaimer No joke.]] ** A few years ago, my aunt said that she didn't want children saying another 'S-word' around her. Suck. As in the phrase, "this sucks". Last month we went to her house again, and it seems that rule is still enforced. Since we're all teenagers, that word [[SarcasmMode must obviously mean we're talking about blowjobs, amirite?]] * A colleague of this troper's mother attempted to have ''TheHungerGames'' removed from her school library. I don't know if she was successful or not. * This troper's Algebra 2 teacher. Other than being a total jerk and not a very good teacher, she also happens to be ''insane.'' She apparently thinks Halloween is a worship of the devil (and gives long

speeches about it to the class on how its evil, despite that anyone who knows the history of Halloween knows its not that at all!), freely admitted that the only songs she'll ever sing are Jesus songs, scolded me in front of the class for whispering the terrible swear of "crap" (and then did it again when I instead said "crabcakes" because I was "just replacing the dirty word!")and made me wear my heavy coat throughout all of class because the shirt I was wearing showed the ''slightest'' shadow of cleavage (seriously, I don't have that much cleavage to show anyway!) Oh, and she told my sister she does the quite illegal thing of ''spending any detention with a non-Christian kid trying to convert them.'' This troper is a conservative Christian, and I want to just punch her in the face for making the rest of us look bad! ** That sounds an awful lot like [[JackChick a particular someone with similar outlooks]]. Even the Halloween part is dead-on. ** I'd make her my own personal project. Purposely get detention with her. Proceed to sing songs like {{Kiss}}: Heaven's On Fire (it's actually about sex, like almost every other song by them) and {{Sabaton}}: Burn Your Crosses. Swear using British swears/slang (calling her a berk in class would be funny). There'd be others of course, but those would be the first things. When I get bored, record her trying to convert me (a dedicated atheist) with my phone. Put it on my computer, my father's computer, my mother's two computers and our other computer. Then play it for her while telling her what I'm going to do (give it to the news). When she (predictably) takes my phone and deletes it, give my best EvilLaugh and tell her about the six backups. Then go to the news. * This troper made the horrible mistake of [[SchmuckBait following the link]] on the main page to the Childcare Action Project moron's site (I know, I shouldn't insult him; he's [[WellIntentionedExtremist wellintentioned, but takes it too far]]), and all movie-watching (or media) has been ruined for me for the next two weeks, if I'm lucky. Seriously, this guy is just...wow. He claimed that [[TheLionKing Scar's]] mention of the "gene pool" ''in the context of an idiom'' was an offense to God because it suggests evolution! Seriously! He seems so proud of how "objective" his system is, but really, he doesn't realize that objectivity has its disadvantages; you have to look at the context before you can call something offensive - and aside from that, he (or whoever) is the one who chooses to add all those petty little things into his system, so it can never be fully objective. His hateful rant against TheGiver was mind-bogglingly incorrect (or maybe he understands, but was mad because it was too scary for gradeschoolers...I was too disgusted to read all of it), so much that I wanted to e-mail him to point out the errors. But wait! I can't do that, because on his "What E-mail Do We Get?" page, he writes off ''anybody who disagrees with him'' as some surly teenager who's upset that their parents decided to raise 'em right or something. I could go on, but...no. I've said my piece. Closing commentary: Sorry, dude, but I think you missed the point. A movie that is totally free of any offense would have no conflict, no plot, no nothing - it would play no part in imparting any sort of moral on kids or teens or anybody, because in order to get people to heed your good advice, you have to

show the negative consequences of making bad choices. (Sorry about this, but I just had to vent. And for the record, my family is Christian and moderately conservative, and we're all offended and sickened that this VocalMinority is so...[[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment vocal]]. Even my very conservative redneck family would think that this is pure tripe! Okay, I'm done.) * [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MGLa3EczA6k This rant on the Parents Television Council]] by [[{{Tropers/Theoriginalblader}} this troper]] could possbly [[DefiedTrope defy]] this trope, especially after [[{{Tropers/Fungal88}} this tropette]] stumbled acrossed it and thoroughly read through the details, which made herself regret feeling too nervous of having to read [[DarkerAndEdgier gritty]] literary masterpieces with profanity as part of her high school's ELA curricula after having to deal with hearing [[ClusterFBomb F-bombs]] that are obviously part of those masterpieces reverberating in the hallways, on the bus, and in the cafeteria, and watching a few clips of R-rated films in classes [[SchoolStudyMedia as teaching tools]] as soon as those moments came, even when she came across other rants similar to this one over the past year or two. As of now, she supposedly felt proud of herself to rely on school in order to make her into the [[PluckyGirl fearless and daring young woman]] she is today. Wow, she must've took the "stay in school" phrase quite [[SeriousBusiness seriously]]. ** Speaking of which, this same tropette was afraid that in her "Intro to Broadcast Writing" course she took in the Spring 2011 semester at her community college, when the professor conversed that trope by mentioning the Parents Television Council, along with why classic LooneyTunes and TomAndJerry cartoons have been yanked off the airwaves in the [[TurnOfTheMillennium 2000s]], the folks that were in the class along with her were going to react negatively to that because of how possibly "near and dear" the cartoons they grew up with were to those people because of how they might have influenced them, so she decided to claim moral guardians as an extremely [[JustifiedTrope justified]] example of the NostalgiaFilter for people in her age group, especially since one of the folks exited the room saying, "I'm gonna recreate RockosModernLife" when the lecture was over for the evening. Luckily she hardly ever noticed that when that happened, especially since she temporarily lost interest in those cartoons at that time and was focusing more on finishing high school and starting college from that point until a few years later, and she is currently doing very well. She was going to mention that CartoonNetwork finally started airing the classic LooneyTunes shorts daily again besides just TomAndJerry, but she supposedly never bothered mentioning them to the professor because she did not want to aggravate him and/or interrupt his lecture. *** Ironically, this was the same professor she had for the Intro to Telecommunications course she took in the Fall 2007 semester, and some students in that class jeered and responded negatively at the professor when he mentioned the details mentioned above in a lecture for that course that were supposedly describing MediaWatchdogs, which was coincidentally around the same time she first stumbled across a

bunch of rants from people in her age group expressing their NostalgiaFilter on the Internet. * This Troper had a friend in '''6th grade''' who wasn't allowed to watch '''SpongeBob''' because he says "stupid" and "shut up." * This troper's mother disapproved of swearing so strongly that she told me off if I said "Bog off". I still don't understand how that is rude language today! * Thankfully, this troper's life was an aversion. I learnt about sex through my classmates at 10 (and thought it was a special kind of hug... and that both participants didn't get naked), and my high school Physics teacher made jokes about a man's... down below. He called up three male volunteers to the front of the class and gave them different-sized rods made of either wood or glass. Then while explaining a made-up "backstory", he said (students named omitted) "X is sad because his stick is smaller than everyone else's." This was the only Physics class I ever seriously paid attention to. * ''Frostsabre.'' Averted in my school's play one year. "We are black people; we are [[NWordPrivileges not niggas"]] or something like that was part of the script, unedited. ** Also I used not to be allowed to watch Nickelodeon (at 6 years old, mind you) because my dad objected to the "Slime Time Live" interludes. Seven or so years later, you'd find a Halo 3 disc in my room. * So many [[MoralGuardian moral guardians]] in this tropette's life: ** Fifth grade computer teacher barred us from saying "What the" because "it always leads to an offensive word. Most of my fifth grade class didn't learn a bad word until grade seven. Also, we were fifth graders, the worst I've heard was "shut up". Oh, the offensive word in question? Heck. And yet the teacher was fine with it on our journals. Our class just started saying "WHAT in THE world" to get her mad. ** My former middle school principle. Our schools initials were PMS (go figure). So when the Publications class needed a name for the broadcast on of the names was PMS Monthly. Everyone, even the teachers, were ok with the name. Even took a poll on the student body to see if it would offend them. Principal still said no. I say the name was poor planning on the city's part. ** Friend's parent would not let us watch TheGrimAdventuresOfBillyAndMandy because of the violence. Cartoony, funny, PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE FOR FIVE YEAR OLDS VIOLENCE. We were twelve when this indicent happened. ** Eight grade English teacher was really against using God as a swear word, so in a notebook entry I used "oh my Gerfingerpokken" instead. ** Parents, thankfully are an aversion. They were the "if they ask questions, give a sarcastic answer and then tell the the truth" type. Their answers were nicer than it sounds. * This troper's mother is convinced that Anime and Manga (my favorite activities now that HarryPotter is over) are evil and turn your brain to mush. Now I've been reduced to secretly reading scanlations online, (with my school website waiting in another window just in case) and watching anime while my parents are out of the house. * [[@/HersheleOstropoler My]] former employer tried Web filtering to prevent slacking off and lawsuits. It lasted about three days: this is the job where I had a work-related reason to go to JennaJameson's Web

site. * This 19-year-old troper's mother is not ''typically'' like this, but has her moments. I watched ''ReturnToOz'' a while back, and she sat down to watch it with me. To note, this is one of my favorite movies, has been since I was about four. She knew that, and yet, when it got to the electroshock therapy, she launched into a tirade about how scary and innappropriate it was. She even went so far as to say that it was a terrible film because it was a bit frightening, and asked me, and I quote, "How can someone be so depraved as to enjoy something like this?" When I reminded her that ''I'd'' first seen it when I wasn't even old enough to start school, she muttered something about it still being too scary and left the room. Interestingly, this is the same woman who bought me ''DangerousLiaisons'' for my birthday... * From what I've heard, a girl I know wasn't allowed to watch KikisDeliveryService just because it was about a [[CuteWitch witch.]] Oh, and she was ''ten''. ''Really now...'' * I(Edgy) notice this trope with a lot of the Troper Tales pages. Perfectly good examples of tropers in real-life deleted maybe only for the reasons that other people do not like. Take TroperTales/BatmanGambit for example. That page is pretty much void of any real examples aside from some lame stories about card games and Chess. There were a few good example on there, but someone deleted them for "curating" and they were bile or anything like that. * This troper's aunt whom I live with banned me from watching TheBoondocks when I was younger, because she thought it's use of the word 'nigga' was demeaning to black people. This despite the fact that she listens to music that constantly says the word, and watches comedians that also constantly use the word. Even our family uses the word in the exact same context. Maybe it just caught her off guard that [[AnimationAgeGhetto a cartoon would use the word]]. Either way I didn't actually stop, I just watched the show in my room. * MoralGuardians stepped in at [[Tropers/AdelePotter This Tropette's]] school when word leaked out that my English class was to read TheAdventuresOfHuckleberryFinn and later have class discussions on it. Us kids were well aware of the content, and had taken a vote-- we wanted the un-{{Bowdlerised}} un-[[{{PC}} PoliticallyCorrectHistory]] version. However, some parents protested. What did we do? We all got the original version from the library and read it anyway. Then, when it was class discussion time, much to the bewilderment of our teacher, we discussed ''it.'' The subject of censorship came up, of course, and once again, word leaked out. It ended in a few of the MoralGuardians grounding their kids, but hey, ''[[CrowningMomentOfAwesome we still won.]]'' * Averted with my mom. She even lets me watch SouthPark. * I have a cousin about to go into fifth grade who can't watch TotalDramaIsland, 6teen, or Stoked. Fair enough, I guess. He's also not allowed to watch AvatarTheLastAirbender. [[{{Facepalm}} Yet, he's allowed to see movies like Super 8, Avatar, and even freakin' Robocop!]] * Living in lovely, Mormon-infested Utah was hard for me as a kid since I was always the only one who wasn't Mormon, to put it simply. I got in arguments with other kids all the time in 7th and 8th grade

over things like gay marriage, abortion, environmentalism, etc (I was very interested in politics from a young age and heavily influenced by my strongly democratic family). My 8th grade science teacher even banned us from watching Obama's inauguration (which was going on during that class) just because she didn't support his politics. I was sufficiently pissed off. ---Sorry, you can't go back to Main/MoralGuardians. We've cut it. But we happen to have a [[{{Disneyfication}} wonderful]] [[{{Bowdlerize}} alternative.]] We're sure you'll just love it! ...Wait, where are you going? * To MoralGuardians, [[ThisIsForEmphasisBitch bitch.]] * Chicago. * [[{{Halo}} To War.]] ** [[DuckSoup To war, to war, to war we're gonna go]]\\ [[BlackComedy Oh hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-ho.]] * I'm goin' to Disney World! * Wherever the wind takes me * [[BioShock To Rapture, where the artist does not fear the censor.]] * To find [[LaResistance some more people who dislike Moral Guardians.]] * To [[{{Disneyfication}} one of the alternatives!]] * [[VideoDrome See you in Pittsburgh...]] * To HighOctaneNightmareFuel. * To kick you. * To [[{{Sin City}} Basin City]]. I hear it's lovely this time of year. * Heigh-ho, heigh-ho, it's off to war we go, with hand grenades and razor blades, heigh-ho heigh-ho heigh-ho! * [[TomLehrer So long, Mom, I'm off to drop the bomb!]] ** Is it an "F Bomb"? If so, take me with you! * Elsewhere. [[PercyJacksonAndTheOlympians I have a Dam Problem I need to deal with.]] * [[EventHorizon Where we're going, we won't need eyes to see!]] * [[BackToTheFuture Where WE'RE going, we don't need roads]] ----

MoralityPet * This troper was this to her friends in high school, who for the most part were self-described cynical atheists without souls. I was a small, unassuming, bespectacled Mormon who was often described as "innocent." One of my friends even admitted that I got him to respect all religions more, even though he'd been the most rabidly antireligion out of all of them. Strangely enough, when I went to college at BYU, my {{Ingenue}} roommate became ''my'' MoralityPet. She was so innocent that I broke her brain and made her ''cry'' when I told her what "ThatsWhatSheSaid" means. I did my best to corrupt her for her own good. * This troper is usually a cold, cynical, emotionless {{complete monster}}, apart from if your name is Jack, and your my little brother. If you even think about taking the piss out of him, you will

find yourself with a mouthful of fist. * This troper [ironically a 'self-described cynical atheist without a soul'] was this in high school and is occasionally still this. * This tropette is considered somewhat cruel by her friends. Having her underclassman friend, who has been dubbed "Hana-chan", certainly helps weather the reputation. This tropette actually invokes the name of MoralityPet when referening to Hana-chan, in a manner following as thus: (whilst waiting after the bell rings for next class) "I have to wait for her, she's my MoralityPet" The friend takes her status in stride. I mean, she's just sooo [[{{Moe}} cute]], I have to watch out for her! * This troper would've turned out a nihilistic bully if not for his two morality pets: First was his grandfather, who only had to look at him to make him want to be a better person, and second was his best friend from college who really helped him keep a lid on his anger issues until he managed to work them through. * This troper would have ended a nihilistic KnifeNut after my parents (very emotional) divorce, were it not for the one constant I had in my life - my little Welsh corgi Gizmo. Due to mom's [[MyBelovedSmother habits]], I had no close human friends at that point in my life. Just Gizmo, whom became the one creature I could talk to and seek for comfort. Needless to say, after he died of heart complications years later, I was in [[HeroicBSOD a vegetative melancholy]] for almost a week. * I am this to most of my classmates, who can't say something related to sex near me, stating that I'm innocent and they're going to [[{{CorruptTheCutie}} corrupt me]]. And my little brother is one to me, due to him calling me [[{{PromotionToParent}} "mommy"]]. * I had two, one who was a girl I was actually nice to in high school, and I still have my younger sister who you should not mess with unless you enjoy pain. * [[Tropers/{{Incom}} This troper]] is in a mutual MoralityPet friendship with someone he almost never sees. I keep her from going straight-up emo, while her existence makes me hold myself to a higher standard.

MorallyAmbiguousDucktorate * This troper was once having a perfectly innocent picnic in a Cambridge park with some friends and looked up to find they were surrounded by a concentric ring of ducks. Which then attempted to eat one of the group's shoes. She will never look at ducks the same way again. ** A ring of sinister looking ducks surrounded you? Same thing happened on this troper's school trip in year six. * This troper once witnessed a bunch of tiny baby ducks chase away some people on a picnic, eat all the food on sight and just stay there after done (while the victims just stared, most likely trying to figure out what to do with them). * This troper used to go to a community college which included a large population of ducks and geese. They were at war. This troper once saw

a duck attempting to rape an injured goose, and that's not even getting into the rumors that the ducks were actually wereducks (THEY PLAYED SOCCER!). * This troper knows someone who got attacked by brazen birds while eating at an outside table with a friend in the Magic Kingdom. The latter was afraid of birds and hid under the table while their lunch got eaten. * This troper has yet to meet a person agreeable to herself who cannot tell at least one horror story about a seagull, duck or a goose. She herself witnessed a duck steal a grade school classmate's hamburger right out of his hands at a picnic. ** Seagulls, ducks or geese? No. But that ----ing chicken when I was a kid... * Ducks are fine, It's geese this Troper has to look out for! * This troper was once chased by ducks when he was about 8. His dad has the whole thing on video. Slightly subverted because he was feeding them at the time and they were more after the bread he was carrying than him. * This troper's friends are convinced that ducks are The Enemy, constantly plotting and scheming, preparing to take over. Geese are their elite troops, and swans are their generals. The funny thing is, on more than one occasion, when I've been out with them, ducks have surrounded us and advanced on us slowly, for no apparent reason, so maybe those guys have a point... * While on vacation, this troper and her friends rented a car. It was a tiny tiny car, so when a swan tried to attack it, we were understandably quite worried. * This troper's father openly hates geese, to the point that he calls them "Spawn of Satan" in everyday conversation. * Having been a student at the University of York, you can safely be informed that duck swarms will occur. Whilst there I was witness to several occasions when students were blocked out of their dorms thanks to the Swans. They even managed to make a student ''bleed'' but however they were protecting their young...who simply picked a stupid place to rest. * This troper lost a frisbee in a large pond that, at first, could've been easily retrieved. However, a single duck saw fit to push towards the middle of the pond, I could almost see it smiling evilly. * [[DokEnkephalin I]] was attacked by a goose when I was a child...I don't remember much more than pissing into a pond, and my brother and sister laughing about me bleeding and bawling when they found me. I still have an interestingly textured scar that makes a nice aftersex conversation piece... * [[Mikado]]'s mom was regularly attacked by a goose at her college. This goose was so vindictive enough to bite through nylons. * Me, my dad, and my brother were at a park one time while waiting for my brother's friend to call (we were going to drop my brother off at the friend's house, which was near the park). In the middle of the park is a pond with a bridge running through the middle. In the bigger side (north side of the bridge) were geese (and some turtles, but they don't matter to the story) and on the smaller side (south side, which had the picnic area) were ducks. Suddenly we saw the geese swim to

shore, walk up the small hill dividing the 2 sides and begin their invasion of the duck's turf. Was sat and watched as the geese took over the area and forced the ducks away. A short time later came the ducks' counter attack, which ended with the ducks retreating in defeat toward the north side. * When this troper was a child, she loved to follow the ducks around at the local park, going "patopatopatopato". One day, the ducks had had enough and turned on her, chasing her. This troper, scared, looks around, sees her toddler sister, and grabbing her sister, shoves her in front like a human shield. Said troper's sister wound up with several bites and a fear of ducks. This troper got a lecture about how "toddlers are not to be used as shielding", and still loves ducks. * This troper's school has a very large lake, which is populated by several pairs of dangerous waterfowl. The canada geese are bad enough, but student health is always seeing human victims of swan attacks. Mute swans are just as deadly...and they're quiet. They're the ninjas of waterfowl. * I was once riding a city bus and as it came to a stop at a bus stop it was attacked by a very pissed off goose, the goose stared the bus down hissing, then flew up biting the windshield wipers and pecked at the tires * This troper was bit by multiple geese in a farm incident when she was 6, a result of trying to feed them and getting my hands stuck in their beaks. I think they mistook my hand for food. Since, I have promised to steer clear of geese at all costs... ---Make your way back to MorallyAmbiguousDucktorate...but take a few pieces of bread, just in case ''they see you''. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MoreDakka * When playing DawnOfWar, I often build nothing but Heavy Bolter Marine Squads and Land Speeders, [[strike: even]] when this is not a good tactic. Why? '''DAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADA KKADAKKADAKKA...''' ** This (different) troper does a similar tactic...but only against the imperial guard. It's surprising ([[VideoGameCrueltyPotential and funny]]) how long it takes for the CPU to realise that it needs a tank to get past the defences. * I do very well with the [[TeamFortress2 The Heavy]] due to he is only guy with a fully automatic weapon that doesn't suck. If the soldier had a submachine gun, I would have used him as well. * In ModernWarfare 2, I created a class that uses [[GunsAkimbo akimbo]] Vectors, which are the fastest-firing weapons in the game

even without the Rapid Fire attachment I put on them. I call it '''[[DoomyDoomsOfDoom Bullet Hose of Doom]]'''.[[hottip:*:Actually, an amusing deconstruction, because even with Steady Aim I can barely hit anything more than ten feet away and it also chews through ammo like there's no tomorrow.]]

MoreHeroThanThou * This troper was once involved in a game of D&D wherein the four of us (two extremely squishy mages, two fighters... we hadn't really thought things through) and an NPC were camped outside a wyvern's lair. I forget why, but several of us wanted to go fight it ourselves. This resulted in one of us sneaking out at nine o'clock, and one at ten o'clock, to go face it, when the plan was to go out at midnight. For the record, everyone but the NPC and one of our wizards died.

MorningSickness * When this troper was in Job Corps, there were ''always'' at least two girls throwing up in the bathroom every morning. * Subverted with this female troper, whose stomach is frequently upset in the morning. She can't have kids and sometimes feels like throttling the people who ask whether she's pregnant. ** This troper's has chronic nausea in the morning as well, which led her to joke that if that's a sign of pregnancy then she's been pregnant her whole life. Then she really did get pregnant... and had one of the worst cases of morning sickness. (At least twice a day with only a second or two of warning, at any time) But in aversion to the whole "immediately after" part of the trope, she didn't start getting actually ill until about a month after conception. * This troper's older sister had horrific "morning sickness," which in fact lasted all day, for 6 months with her first pregnancy. She had twins, and four years later managed to convince herself that maybe she was only so sick the first time because she was having twins. So she got pregnant again, and it was actually worse the second time. Not surprisingly, that was her last baby. * This troper's mother threw up at least once a day every single day of her pregnancy. She was even throwing up during her C-Section (though that probably had more to do with the fact that she had a bad reaction to the anesthetic...). This was probably because she was, like the above troper's sister, pregnant with twins. ---Go back to [[MorningSickness M...]] ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MostAnnoyingSound * Screaming. Especially if it's extremely high-pitched. [[{{Tropers/HikaruTheHedgehog}} I]] cannot stand screaming. Usually, I'm fine. But as soon as I hear one, I end up feeling incredibly upset

and I become temporarily mute to prevent myself from losing all control of my temper. ** It's also the reason why I turn off the volume on most video games I play. It somehow doesn't detract from the fun. Wait, what if I wanted to know what the characters are saying? Simple: I turn on subtitles. Even though it's designed for the hearing impaired, it's still useful for those who are sensitive to screams and always turn off the volume on a lot of games. Like [[{{Tropers/HikaruTheHedgehog}} me]]! *** [[{{Tropers/Punkreader}} This troper]] also has the thing about screaming women and screaming children. I have what's known as Sensory Integration Dysfunction. Basically, I process sensory input differently - ''especially'' sound. On a good day, if there's a screaming kid around for more than 10 minutes, I'll simply leave or step into another room, and I'm fine. On a ''bad'' day... I curl up into a ball and/or start losing my normally carefully kept temper. It never fails to give me either migraines or throw my nervous system off and screw me up for the rest of the day. I'm also a Covert Pervert, but I CANNOT watch porn. Ever. It's too damn cringe-inducing to listen to those women screaming. ''GAH''. * Are you below 25? Ever heard the mosquito tone? No, not the phone. The version of it that was WEAPONIZED against teenagers for a while. The entire class was rolling around on the floor. * In my house our kitchen sink is a really crappy sink and any time someone makes both the hot and cold water running all the way it makes this GODAWFUL high-pitched squealing noise. I seem tobe the only one bothered by the damn noise. So what does my mom do EVERY time she cooks or even in the kitchen? * For this troper, it's the shrill sound of a home telephone ringing. ** ''This''. First ring: "Hey! Hey! I'm ringing! Pick me up!" Ring Two: "You're not picking me up..." Third Ring: "PICK ME UP, DAMN YOU!!" Fourth Ring: "Alright, FINE! HAVE IT YOUR WAY! Hello, we are not here right now..." *** Try being at a friend's house and your friend ''doesn't have an answering machine'' and won't answer the phone for some reason. You have to listen to it until the person calling gets tired of trying and hangs up. [[MostAnnoyingSound And sometimes they call right back.]] ** How about the sound of someone else's phone ringing when you're the one calling them and they haven't picked up yet? RRRRRRRGGGGGHHHH. ** For me, it's many of the default rings for cellphones. Especially when people in my family pick said annoying default ringtones. ** Considering how much of an aversion I have to talking on the phone, even moreso for me. I intentionally pick the most annoying default ringtones for my cell because I don't want to [[RuinedForever ruin]] any of my favorite songs by associating them with getting calls when I really don't want to. * For [[{{Cameoflage}} this troper]], it's people shouting at their misbehaving children and/or pets. (A close second is the oddly common phenomenon of children shrieking at the tops of their goddamn lungs for no apparent reason.) It's got nothing to do with what they're actually saying; something about the ISO Standard Angry Parental-Type Tone ''itself'' makes it feel like someone's driving red-hot railway

spikes into my ear canals. ** Also, once I reach a certain level of stress/irritation, ''everything'' becomes the MostAnnoyingSound. Glasses being heavily set down on the tabletop, the microwave beeping, floorboards creaking, other people's banal conversations... ** Once, [[MrGuy This Troper]] was on a train, and a woman was shouting at her baby child which could not have been more than a year old. Eventually, I couldn't hold in my disgust any longer, and asked her to stop, because it was only a little kid. ** This troper agrees with the first post of this part. I HATE it when little kids feel the need to scream at the top of their lungs instead of saying it quietly. I was once in a castle (that ECHOES, by the way) and a little kid screamed "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" in a really shrill scream that nearly deafened me. * For this troper, it's the high-pitched scream of a small child. She's phonosensitive. At best, it's a mild form of BerserkButton for her. At worst, it's migraine-inducing. * Newborn. Babies. Their shrill, whining screams makes me want to set it on fire. Screw the fact it's only a day old it's annoying! * This Black troper is sad to say many in my ethnicity suck their teeth every two minutes at the most minor inconvenience, if even that, and I feel like snapping necks when I hear it. * For this troper, screaming babies are ALWAYS a berserk button. And that godawful mosquito ring tone. * This troper will just agree with the previous two. Screaming kids from newborn to under seven are terrible. ** Try riding on the same city bus as a baby with an ear infection. This troper is pretty sure she lost some hearing in her left ear. * [[@/{{Night}} This Troper]] is always ready to remind you that it's the sound of a rapidly clicking pen. Further evidence that he is, in fact, ThatTroper. ** [[DeadRising2 Frank West]] [[BerserkButton would agree]]. ** Huh, I find making that sound fun. *** This troper once up and confiscated the pen from a coworker that was clicking it. Said coworker had shown a total disrespect for being asked nicely to do anything, but the first thing out of his mouth upon his pen being removed was "HEY, you jerk, you could have just asked nicely for me to stop..." Horse pucky, then I would have heard the second most annoying sound in the world- "You're not the boss a me! You can't tell me what to do!" * Certain dog barks, when I'm close to the dog, and ringing ears, because it leaves fear in me that my ears are going to permanetly lose a lot of their sense of hearing. ** Sounds like me. I fret constantly about hearing damage, so I have more than one reason to hate dogs barking close to me and people suddenly yelling in my ear. * NAILS. ON. CHALKBOARD. ** AUGH. Porcelain scraping against each other is in the same category. * This troper even hates loud crying, ''period''. She feels bad about it, since obviously it's not that person's fault for crying so hard, but she just can't stand it.

* [[{{Quillpaw}} This troper]] explained this concept to her grandmother. -->"I hate five things. Screaming babies, screaming children, screaming teenagers, screaming parents, and screaming vocalists in really loud bands." * Alarm clock buzzers. Quite effective, but when I need to wake up early, the sound literally haunts my dreams. * I CANNOT for the love of me stand the sound of cloth ripping or being torn. It's so gross I just cannot be in the room when I hear that. * For [[DaNuke Da_Nuke]], it's cars rigged with fart cans. Either your stock engine growls like a dragon, or it doesn't. Pretending is futile. ** For this troper a fartcanned ricer or chopper can drop him to his knees on the sidewalk due to the instant and intense headache it causes. ** He also configured his laptop to unleash a ''mind-boggingly grating screech'' whenever he runs out of battery. ** Also, the Mexico City traffic. Imagine a place where ''everyone'' honks the horn as soon as you slow down... ''EVEN IF YOU SLOW DOWN BECAUSE YOU STOPPED AT A RED LIGHT INSTEAD OF SKIPPING IT.'' (For the record, he lives in Guadalajara, where horns are only heard when truly necessary). * This troper finds items with rigid surfaces such as nail filers annoying. It's not really a sound, but perhaps mini-flags or something like that count. * [[PurplePantherGirl This troper]]'s little brother humming StarWars. Constantly. On a loop. * If anyone EVER tears napkins in front of me, I'll [[DisproportionateRetribution literally beat]] [[AxCrazy the hell out of them.]] * Squeaking styrofoam. * whimper* ** ''This'' turned up to eleven. Even worse when he has to carry it around. ** In the same vein, stepping on tightly packed snow on an incredibly cold day produces almost the exact same soud. ''GAH.'' * That beeping noise friers make in fast food kitchens. Of course, if you asked my boss, the most annoying sound would be me saying "I'm givin' 'er all she's got, Cap'n! She can nae taik enny more!" when all six baskets are down and he's demanding more fries. * This troper finds that while he has to be really close up, the sound made by the cheap crappy erasers on the end of some pencils sets his teeth on edge. * There's this one species of bird, I have no idea what it's called, I've never even seen it, but in the mornings it sings this awful twonote song over and ''over'' and '''over.''' You may be surprised that a mere two-note song can be annoying, but every time I hear it it's almost as though the bird is gloating about how uncomplicated and happy his life is compared to mine. ** I'd assume that I wrote this and forgot about it, but I didn't learn how to make italics and bolded words until a few days ago, so I'd like to offer my sympathy. I hate those @#$!& things too. There's

a whole group of them living in my neighborhood, and I can hear them from my school. Nobody else seems to understand how flippin' IRRITATING that call is. *** I hear the little bastards too... there's one living in the tree ''right'' outside my window. He (or she, I don't know or care which) is one of the main reasons this troper is usually up before nine despite being very much NotAMorningPerson. ~cocks imaginary shotgun~ *** This Troper hears them (or at least something similar) occasionally as well. Though he didn't mind them initially, (he first heard one of the little things at about 4 or 5, and they pretty much taught him to whistle on that day... yeah, I imitated their annoying little sound for a while after that) he would later end up hating their guts. Honestly, these things are one of the reasons I find the whole "Bird Songs a beautiful" thing to [[TastesLikeDiabetes Be A little bit over-the-top]]. *** I have those birds, too. I actually find them nice to listen to, really. *** It's not a [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b_C2Z9PWEaM chiffchaff]], is it? This troper is a bird lover, but after listening to one of those cute little monotonous bastards outside the window during every Computing class for a year... *** Definitely not a chiffchaff. Imagine more like a "wee-woo!" * pause* "wee-woo!" * pause* * repeat endlessly* **** Ah, ya babies. Try being woken by those two tone birds AND seagulls.. at the same time! ** This troper is currently being plagued by one. If it doesn't shut up by may, he has sworn to find it and kill it. ** Also, robins. Beloved icons of summer? Yes. Incessant chirping at 5 in the morning right outside your bedroom window? Also yes. * This troper's on-campus accommodation is in a fancy new building apparently built by chimpanzees. One rather irritating part is that if a door to the outside is left open even a crack (and most don't close very readily), there's a persistent beeping noise that prompts this troper to storm around closing them all while [[VoiceOfTheLegion snarling things about "crushing souls" in the most evil voice he can]]. The fun part? One of the doors just ''broke'' and won't shut properly. At all. * Heavy breathing. It drives [[KingSonnDeeDoo This Troper]] ''insane'', hearing it. Also, the sound of someone eating, whilst they lean over her shoulder. Usually when she's at the computer. Both sounds make said troper want to go and punch the person doing it. ** Oh God, don't even get me started on heavy breathing. This troper's father does it CONSTANTLY. He has yet to learn what my quick, irritated looks at him are for. He still doesn't quite grasp it when I leave the room because I just can't stand listening to him anymore. ** The sound of people eating is annoying to me, too, often to a severe degree. I despised the moments where the whole family ate Mc Donalds on a road trip in the car. With no radio on or windows down. Just the constant smack and swallow of disgusting, infuriating, getme-the-hell-out-of-here eating noises acting as my own personal soundtrack from Hades. *** Ugh, I understand completely. I hate eating with my family now

since no one closes their mouths when eating (which is confusing, since I do) and never seem to breath properly, meaning they have to breath in ''while'' they eat, through their mouths. It's really hard for me to eat with that sound coming from three other people in the room. * My computer was once infected with a trojan called Virus Melt. I got rid of it, but before I did that it would pop up at random times with a loud screech noise, an annoying set of beeps, or something that sounds like fingernails on a blackboard. * For [[{{Choir}} This Troper]] it's several things: the fake moaning sounds people make when acting tired, smacking lips when yawning (* yawn* * opens and closes mouth loudly* ), audible yawns in general, quiet songs being sung WAY TOO F*** ING LOUD, screaming "singers", whining... most of these are caused by my sister constantly doing them... * [[{{Brosandi}} This Troper]] is driven nuts by three sounds: ** Two people screaming at the same time and having their tones just off enough that you can hear it wobbling. Ugh... ** Heavy machinery squeaking. ** Really loud, really heavy bass in songs. This troper lives in an area where people will jack up the volume in their car stereos so loud you can hear the bass from thirty feet away. It makes me want to shriek. *** ''This''. One of these days I want to build an [=EMP=] gun and become a weaponized-bass-eliminating vigilante. * [[{{Tinweasel}} I would say]] it's the sound of people yelling "WOOOOOOOOOOO!" It's a sound generally made by rowdy sports fans, rowdy drunks, drunken sports fans, and [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment rowdy drunken sports fans]]. Also made by people who follow my commanding officer's mandate to "hoot and holler" for completely meaningless awards that the old man has a high opinion of. [[TheLastDJ Fuck. That. Noise.]] * The sound of two forks scraping together makes [[{{Wheezy}} this troper's]] teeth grate, and the sound of women screaming makes him want to get into a fetal position. * [[MisterAlways This troper]] is a heavy sleeper. So his mom bought him an alarm clock. A cheap one, okay. And the noise. The NOISE it makes... It's so... BALL-SHRIVELLINGLY ANNOYING. I used the thing for a month, and then I threw it out of my bed at the speed of sound. I then hid the (still ticking) remains under my futon. ** Also, the sound of pidgeons cooing in the morning. That endless "roo-koo, roo-koo, roo, roo-koo, roo-koo, roo, roo-koo" makes me want to feed them styrofoam. * Here's a funny story. When my mother was pregnant with me, she adopted a unique method of baby naming - [[GenreSavvy knowing ahead of time that she would be yelling at her kid for at least the first five years of its life,]] [[CrazyPrepared she had a habit of going around the backyard and screaming random names,]] e.g. "Tyler! Get back here!", "Christie! Put that ''down''!". She ended up choosing the name which felt most comfortable to yell. Result? Whenever people yell my name, they invariably yell it in the whiniest emo-band voice you can think of. The worst part is that nobody (''nobody'') has the decency

to just ''walk down the friggin' hall and get me when they want me''. You think you got it bad with your most annoying sound? I hear mine ''all the goddamn time.'' * Once, this troper was in the computer lab at her school. Another student walked up to her and said "Hey, [[InvokedTrope want to hear the most annoying sound in the world?"]] After I gave a noncommittal sort of shrug, he opened his mouth and produced what is indeed the most annoying sound in the world. Sort of a cross between a drawn-out whine and a computer beeping. I think I punched him. * [[KitsuneInari This Troper]]'s computer tends to overheat, specially in the afternoon. It goes [[CriticalAnnoyance BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP]], then often stops when the temperature falls below the alarm treshold or when the snooze is pressed. Then it starts again after a few seconds. [[ItJustBugsMe Rinse and repeat]]. * Screaming in music. It's especially bad when there's one or two screams and the song is otherwise wonderful. Or when the lyrics are wonderfully well-written and well-thought-out, but you ''can't tell what they are without a lyrics sheet'', because the singer is shrieking, roaring or even squealing the song instead of signing it (I'm looking ''straight'' at you, Demon Hunter. There is absolutely nothing so wrong with your singing voice that you have to screech instead.) Who the heck decided it was a good idea, anyway? How could anyone on the planet actually enjoy the sound of another human being screaming like they're being murdered? ** Also, another vote for shrieking children. I understand kids are hyper, but why on earth do they feel the need to make so much noise? If they're laughing or playing it's one thing, but literally just ''shrieking'' for no reason and with no context? ** Silverware scraping against a frying pan. My mom tends to stir soups, "hamburger helper", etc.. with a metal fork or spoon. It makes my teeth hurt. ** The dozens of various noises my twelve-year-old brother makes when he's trying to be funny or literally has nothing else to do. He has one that's like an inward gasping shriek. That he can draw out for like five minutes straight. More than once I've heard it from across the house and thought one of our animals was severely injured or dying. * Any time this troper goes to the flea market, he has to be prepared for the dozens of dealers selling those dolls that play the wedding march over and over and over and over. * Fran Drescher. * For this troper, it's children (babies and toddlers) screaming. You do NOT KNOW how annoying it is for a kid that for some reason WILL NOT STOP SCREAMING. ** Yes I do. The people who used to live behind this troper's house had a dog that barked all the time. We wished they'd move away. They did - and were replaced by people with about ''three kids who scream nonstop from sun-up to sun-down.'' * headwall* (Also, this troper's cousin often leaves her dog with her. Said dog has not been trained well and barks repeatedly, all day long. Another annoying sound is stuff being scraped against styrofoam.) * Every cat I have ever lived with ''experimented'' to figure out the

most irritating possible yowl it was capable of producing, and then used this yowl to indicate emergencies ranging from "My food dish is empty" to "This door is closed, and I want it open" to "Hey, did you know I exist?" * Self Service checkouts in the supermarket. "Please place your items in the bagging area...Please ''place your items in the bagging area''". "Insert cash, or select other payment type. ''Insert cash, or select other payment type.''" there's always this slightly different emphasis when it (needlessly) repeats itself, that makes it sound patronising enough to be really annoying, yet so subtle one can't be sure it's just a product of the imagination. ** 'Item has been removed from the bagging area. Item has been removed from the bagging area.' Now, I'm usually quite a chill person but hearing that, especially when the item has just changed position in the bag, is enough to make me start gesturing at the machine like it's a person, and start kicking stuff. ** This troper '''will not''' use the self-service checkouts. Full stop. Doesn't matter how long the queue at the normal checkouts is; I just don't want to put myself through five minutes of that damned voice. * Art chalk. Just ''thinking'' about it makes my hair stand on end. * Snoring. Thankfully [[TsundeRay I]] don't do that, or I'd be a hypocrite for bringing that up. ** [[SurvivalMantra Do not smother your roommate with a pillow, Do not smother your roommate with a pillow,]] Do ''not'' smother your roommate with a pillow... ** [[{{Aerodactylus}} This troper]] has done some rather unfortunate things in the quest to get the person snoring to stop. Including throwing a blanket over their face, punching them, pulling them out of bed...yeah. Snoring and I don't mix. ** ''This''. My dad and younger brother both snore, and it's especially annoying since Dad likes falling asleep on the couch and I have to share a room with my brother... so much precious sleep lost over the years... ** My dad also like sleeping on the couch. Which wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have really good hearing. As a result, come 10:00 I have to hear his LOUD FUCKING SNORING ALL FUCKING NIGHT. And what's worse, if I'm watching something and turn the volume up because I can't hear over the snoring, he somehow snores '''LOUDER'''. At times I get to the point that I end up punching the wall hoping it'll make him shut up for a few minutes so I can sleep (just like with the TV, he ends up snoring louder than the sound of me punching the wall). * Note: Asperger's syndrome + Sound don't mix. Dogs. People screaming. Telephones. Alarms. People talking. Dogs. DOOOOOOOOOGS. ** Fellow Aspie here, seconding you on the people screaming one HARD. In fact, most high-pitched sounds (and high-pitched speaking voices both sexes) have the tendency to just fuck me off. As does the sound of people smacking while eating or chewing with their mouths open. SHUT YOUR GODDAMN MOUTHS!! Ironically, [[{{Scooz}} this troper]] likes listening to metal. Read into that what you will. * For this troper, the sound of a felt tip marker, especially the cheap ones, being dug into paper really makes me skin crawl,

literally. I can always feel the hair on my arms go up... I hated colouring when in Kindergarten. * Nothing makes me want to go to the zoo with a chainsaw and punish innocent animals more than a barking dog. (Especially my roomate's, who likes to do it early in the morning for 30 minutes straight while his master just sits there, glassy-eyed, and counts his fucking Pokmon cards.) * For this troper, it's the sound her best friend makes when she sighs (in the kind of 'not really interested in the topic at hand' kind of way). It's just... she already has the weird soft/low/shrill (if that's even possible) kind of voice, and when she ''sighs''... I want to claw my ears out. Like, when ''normal'' people sigh in that way, it's short and has a softer quality to the sound, but when ''she'' does it, it's long, starts soft, heightens in pitch through the middle while ''still remaining somewhat soft'' and then lowers again until it ends. And she does it ''a lot'', so one of us is going to have to change something before I go berserk and knife her in the throat. And I mean that in the nicest way possible. * People badly attempting accents which aren't their own. Fake British accents in particular. * The sound of people grinding their teeth. I had to sit next to someone who was constantly grinding his teeth habitually for two hours non-stop while I was trying to focus on my college assignment. I didn't say anything because I didn't want to be rude. I could almost feel my blood pressure slowly rising. ** And now said colleague is grinding his teeth and making a weird snorting noise as well. HELP. ME. PLEASE. [[{{Angrish}} DFGFGSFSGFSGFSDGFDGFSGFH]]. * For this troper, it's the sound of her twin sister crying. And before you say 'awww', it's not because it makes me sad. I find it irritating and very grating. * For [[FourtyTwoHz this troper]], hard drives and CPU fans. Also, he works in a lab with lots of large workstations which are noisy enough. * The sound of a fork scraping across the plate just makes me want to ''scream''. * This troper has so many due to his Asperger's Syndrome he'll make a list: ** Cannot stand static-esque buzzing, and my guitar amplifier's buzzing when in overdrive mode doesn't help. ** Old fashioned "ring a ding a ding!" style phones. ** That damned mosquito ringtone, yeah I know you don't want your teachers hearing your cell phones, but for my sake, TURN IT ON VIBRATE AND SHUT THAT DEVILDAMNED NOISE OFF! ** The sound of my ears ringing. Not to mention loss of hearing is a PrimalFear of mine, so that's especially a big one. ** People smacking. Hate to sound like a douche, but it's annoying no matter what. ** Ovens and such beeping. ** Dogs Whining. I love mine to death but that drives me crazy. * [[@/PentiumMMX2 This troper]] has a few: ** Senseless screaming; especially when the person is over the age of 8. I was attending the graduation ceremony of one of my cousins, when

the girl sitting right behind me (No younger than 15) screamed at the top of her lungs after one of her friends went up to get their diploma. After that, I moved to a seat much further away from her should she decide to do that again ** Whiny children. If I where to ever find myself trapped in a place filled with whiny kids, with no possible escape in sight, I'd attempt to find a gun and shoot myself in the head, in hopes that either (A) [[DrivenToSuicide I die]] or (B) [[{{Persona 3}} it summons my Persona]] (More likely, the former would happen, but the latter would be pretty badass; regardless of wither my Persona could help me escape or not) ** That song from the ad for {{Bayonetta}}. Sure, the game looks awesome, but I hated hearing that song practically every 5 minutes when looking around my local Gamestop around the time that game came out. It was to the point that I joked with the manager up there that if I had $1 for every time I heard that song while I was in there, I'd have enough to buy a copy of Bayonetta and still have money left to buy NewSuperMarioBrosWii ** One that, unfortunately, comes with my job (Which, for the record, is cleaning equipment at the local hospital) is the sound of someone lazily dragging a bedside commode across the floor to the cleaning room. To me, the sound of the rubber feet on one of those dragging across the tile floors is like nails to a chalkboard. * I find [[{{MiraShio}} myself]] ''incredibly'' annoyed by two of my classmates when they start singing in low voices in the middle of class. Yes, they're good singers, but first, the girl's voice more often than not sounds ''way'' too high-pitched and as though she was breathing through her nose; second, she mispronounces "th" a ''lot''. I hate this situation so much that I have ended up excusing myself from the class and finishing my work at the stairwell more than once. * Coughing. Not just for others, but for ''yourself'' too, especially if it's uncontrollable. * While playing ''{{Mushihime-sama}} Futari'': [[SmartBomb "EHHHHHHHHHHH!" / "IMA DA, HIROW!"]] Not really the sound itself so much as when throwing a bomb in ''[[ExpansionPack Black Label]]'', which carries a [[ScrappyMechanic massive counter penalty]]. * The buzz of fluorescent lightbulbs. I don't care if I'm killing Mother Earth a little bit by using incandescent bulbs, I'd rather maintain my sanity. * They used to sell anime themed alarm clocks at the mall. The [[DragonBall Goku]] one is by far the most obnoxious, although the ''SailorMoon'' has her theme sped up and a chirpy "GOOD MORNING--" before it replays the theme. It gets louder the longer you leave it on. [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D6V5eX4Fom0 Here's a clip of it.]] * The scrape of a metal fork across a ceramic plate. The sound of someone hocking a loogie. Or ''preparing'' to hock a loogie by [[{{Squick}} sniffing all that nasal-mucus back into their throat.]] The sound of a bluescreen on a TV, when it's on but no program is because it's switched to the channel for video-games. [[LegendOfZelda Navi]]. * The sound that is made when anyone scratches something that is like

those holographic agendas, or even live violins. Got a shiver thinking about it. * This is why [[DKN117 my]] (now deceased) maternal grandmother couldn't stand SpongebobSquarepants. Namely, Spongebob's laugh grated on her horribly. This Troper could (and still can) do a rather good impression of it, but refrained from doing so in order to not give gramma a reason to use [[DeathGlare The Look]]. * When I'm in class, and when people chew, or worse, crack their gum. They aren't supposed to have it in class anyway. The teachers do nothing at all. * EVERY. SINGLE. SOUND. THAT. IS. MADE. Seriously anytime a sound is made I just want to brutally ''murder'' someone! * On this very site, the f#&king adbot's "Everybody in Love" banner. Which "[[StopHelpingMe helpfully]]" offers a music sample upon mouseover - which means every time I have carefully maneuver my mouse around the goddamned thing or be blasted with crappy music. Congrats, JIS or whatever that emblem is supposed to say. You've single-handedly become the most annoying group I know, and I've never even heard of you before. * One of the worst things about a morning class is the fact that some environmental factor or another (cold, pollen, heat-to-cold, etc.) causes half the class to sniff up snot. You ever try to take a test when surrounded by people doing that? * sniff* * sniff* * sniff* ..."BLOW YOUR NOSE, DAMMIT!!!" That I didn't bust out with this is indicative of very strong self-control. * Also, people texting. Those little key-clicks...''rrrggghh!'' What could '''''possibly''''' be ''so'' important at 8 in the frickin' ''morning?!'' ** Or that BEEP-BEEP-BEEP-BEEP ringtone everyone loves for when they get a text. I'd rather not have a phone than listen to that. * There are two sounds that will [[CriticalAnnoyance drive me insane]] more than anything else ever: rubbing two pieces of styrofoam together, and writing with a mechanical pencil to the point where the sound of the lead dragged across the paper is VERY audible (for me). Both not only give me goosebumps, but they also piss me off much faster than any other sound I've heard. * Oh God, how should this troper begin? ** The meowing/yowling cats make when they are in heat. I either want to shoot them or leave the door open so they can do as they please and shut the hell up. ** Clarinet squeaks. I understand that you're going to squeak eventually, but when it's one squeak after another, either check your reed or learn how to fucking play your instrument! You're in high school already. ** There is this girl in my health class that I just want to punch sometimes. She's nice, a bit too random, but nice. But dear God, when she laughs, it's this "Beavis and Butthead" laugh that echoes in the room. I find it ironic that we have the same birthday. ** A guy in my English class used to bring his GameBoyAdvance SP, and he would turn it on and shut it off numerous times during the middle of a test. The "DING!" that was heard almost made me dent the desk. ** Not necessarily a sound, but it drives me raving mad when someone

is assigned (or they choose) to read a short story in English and they mispronounce some words as though they were in a different language. People, how hard is it to say "immortality," "mere," and "apprehension?" Also, these people don't have the slightest idea on how to read properly. They read sentences as though the periods didn't exist, read dialogue as though it was just another sentence, and read sentences with a tone that suggests they trailed off. It gets so grating that I stop following along, block them out, and read silently to myself. If I don't, their errors will make me miss the whole point of the paragraph. ** My dogs barking in the middle of the night or barking for no reason. * Among others, this troper hates a sound which is made when someone talks while eating a banana. (No not that thing!) * This troper has a few: ** WOW! THAT'S A LOW PRICE! ** Anything by Lady Gaga. Even worse if my friends are singing ALONG... ** Spongebob's voice in the [[SeasonalRot newer episodes.]] ** ANYTHING Kristen Wiig does on SNL. ESPECIALLY the "Just Kidding" lady... ** Little kids that think they're "cool" or "funny". My mom teaches third grade, and I spend some time in her room before leaving for class. Oh, if only it were legal to smack some kids... ** My dad when giving instructions, especially on things I've done a million times [[StopHelpingMe BEFORE!]] Learning how to drive was [[TrainingFromHell HELL...]] ** My dad's singing. He can only ever remember the chorus, and he sings the same chorus all day. The worst part? He does it ON PURPOSE. Mom's singing isn't much better, but at least she doesn't purposefully annoy me with it. * On [[Tropers/{{Roxor}} my list]] of annoying sounds: ** The telephone. Not only do I hate it for the noise it makes, but also for what I'll have to do if I end up being the one who has to answer the bloody thing. ** Those horrid yappy dogs. ** Babies. Yeah, I understand the need for reproduction, but why do they have to make such a horrid noise? ** High-pitched voice + American accent = this trope. Doubly awful if the recording was made in an environment with a lot of short-delayed echo. ** The visual analogue of this trope would have to be the flickering from fluorescent tubes which need replacing or CRT screens with the refresh rate set too low. Or strobe lights. * This troper HATES ** Styrofoam. Oh God where to begin, just thinking about it makes me flinch. ** I hate that sound CRT's make when on the input channel. ** Extreme bass I hate with a passion, but my brother loves to put that on his 5.1 in our basement. ** Children screaming and yelling. ** That squeaking sound shoes make when you turn real fast.

** Dogs barking. My neighbor has a collie named Duke who barks and chases everything ALL THE DAMN TIME!!! It REALLY doesn't help since most of my other neighbors have dogs, too. * A particular American accent. I don't know which part of America it's from, but it makes every muscle in my body tense with pure irritation. Especially when people who have said accent say 'Mirror'. It comes out 'Meeer'. 'MEEER'. Gah. ** Also, from my own fair, green country- the Sussex accent, the Glaswegian accent, and my own Norwich accent. (Norwich accent is like the nasal drawn out Norfolk accent except the vowels are a lot shorter and barely anyone pronounces their consonants. 'Alrigh'? Oim appy ta see ya.' Urrgh) * Crickets. At night. When you are trying to sleep. * Hey there, guy in front of [[Tropers.{{TheAmazingIowan}} me]] at the IronMaiden concert. ''[[UnstoppableRage STOP BLOODY WHISTLING WHILE BRUCE IS TALKING!]]'' * This troper hates girls screaming - particularly when it's as high and ear-perforating possible. And like anyone not born in Africa, the vuvuzela - which he knew a year before TheWorldCup, as the 2009 Confederations Cup was also in South Africa and those annoying horns were in every game. ** There's nothing else to do... * A program in frequent use at work plays a standard sound to signal that it's ready for a new task. My old modem at home used the same sound to indicate a lost connection. * Gagging. Not that I don't feel sorry for the victim, but it's sickening. * Music played in stores. I don't mind if I can block it out with my earphones (which is usually the case at the local supermarket) or if the music isn't annoying, but being in a shop while crap music is being * blasted* at near-maximum volume so that you can hear it even outside is my idea of hell. I'm looking at you, JB Hi-Fi. (I don't live in Australia, but there's a few in Auckland, New Zealand). * Go to London and take the subway, you WILL hear "Mind the gap" ad nauseum. It seems to have undergone MemeticMutation, as I've seen souvenir magnets in the shape and color of the subway logo, reading Underground, Mind The Gap and Fuck the Gap. * Music being played on cell phones. My god, it sounds like it's being put through a megaphone backwards. Relatedly, when I can hear other people's headphones, and when people leave speakerphone turned on. Less relatedly, the "whimpering" sound dogs make when they think you should pet them and a TV left on in another room. * Every time I watch CartoonNetwork... [[CatchPhrase "WHAT TIME IS IT?!]] [[WesternAnimation/AdventureTime ADVENTURE TIME!"]] Ok, look. I'm glad a show on CN is getting good advertising, but this happens [[ThisIsSparta EVERY. SINGLE. COMMERCIAL. BREAK.]] Of course, it doesn't help that I don't like the show, either [[YourMilageMayVary {From what I hear, it's kind of popular.)]] * Ditto screaming kids (be the parent, ''shut them the FUCK UP'', and '''TELL THEM NO!!!'''), smacking (I know people say it makes food taste better, but I work with a woman who smacks so loud and so much '''''I''''' can damn near taste it!) and * sniff-exhale* * {{beat}}* *

sniff-exhale* * {{beat}}* * sniff-exhale* * {{beat}}* * sniff-exhale* * {{beat}}* (sniff like you mean it or blow your damn nose!). * Babies/children screaming, dogs barking(I love mine, but his breed had a bark that carries bred into it, and considering we live on a fairly busy street with a motorcycle-riding neighbor, he barks a LOT), but most of all, my teeth accidentally grinding together. I can't quite do it on purpose, but when it happens I always cringe. It doesn't help that it also feels really, really upsetting to me for some reason. * The two smaller dogs at my house barking. They have really loud barks despite being so small, and we've learned not to ring the doorbell. Except my dad, who does it to make them bark on purpose. I've actually screamed "SHUT UP!" at them more than once, especially when the doorbell is rung consecutively. * [[OverusedRunningGag Babies and little kids screaming, whining and crying.]] At Target. On vacation. In a restaurant. In the mall. In a van (long story). '''[[PrecisionFStrike FUCKING]] EVERYWHERE.''' And this troper wonders why she's probably the only person on earth who doesn't find babies the cutest, sweetest thing ever. *sigh* ** ''(same troper as above)'' This troper would also like to speak for her best friend, who isn't a troper, but finds the sound of her little sister's voice very annoying. ** ''(same troper as above)'' At my school, when you get to the locker hallway to pick up your books for subject X, my annoyingly whiny former math teacher yells at everyone to pick up their books and go ("Come on, people, pick up your books and get to homeroom! Hurry up, let's go!") Hey, it's not ''my'' fault my bus driver's always late. * My roommate's voice. Even worse is her {{Angrish}}. * Before I joined Tvtropes yesterday, my disk drive broke. It now whirs the motor futily as I write this page. My mother wont let me, but I beieve the solution is PercussiveMaintenance with a ball-peen hammer or [[CompanionCube suitably large rock]]. * Paris actually uses this as an incentive to keep your Navigo transit pass in order. When you put it on the scanner and it's expired, it makes an ''incredibly'' grating buzz. * Burping. I can't be the only one who finds the very sound of a burp to be absolute NauseaFuel, can I? ** You're not alone. And I hate how a boy in my class always tries to press out the loudest and most disgusting burps he can. Really, it's not cool. * Pretty much anything higher than an 8 on MohsScaleOfRockAndMetalHardness. (Although most of the stuff under 11, while still unlistenable, is hilarious only because of how it parodies ([[StealthParody I hope!]]) the sort of stuff that just ''really needs'' to be made fun of.) * The error message sound on computers. * For me it's Auto-Tune. I am sure there are other annoying sounds, but Auto-Tune is the one that sticks out right now. I can NOT understand why people seem to love it. * "We'll be right back" "GO COMPARE!!!" I. WANT. TO. KILL. THAT. GUY * One of the very few episodes of ''SouthPark'' that I refuse to watch ever again is "Lice Capades". Not because it wasn't a good story (it

was actually pretty clever) or anything particularly inappropriate occurred, but it is unwatchable on sole virtue of ''the lead louse's voice.'' "I have to try and SAVE MAH BEH BEH! KEL-LAAAHHHHHHHH!!" It made me loathe him far and away above any other ''SouthPark'' character, regular or one-shot, that I can think of at this time. Throughout that episode I silently begged the writers to kill him so I wouldn't have to hear his voice anymore. [[spoiler:They didn't.]] * [[DonkeyKong BWEWOP BWEWOP BWEWOP BWOOOO!]] Tropers/{{M0therBrain}} thinks this is the most annoying sound in the history of video gaming. * Any time this San Francisco Bay Area troper takes the [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bay_area_rapid_transit BART]]. I don't know if it's just me having only ridden three times in my life, but holy hell, when my train is in tunnels going full speed, IT IS SCREECHY AS FUCK. It manages to drown out my iPod at 50-60% volume. * For this troper and his mother, its this Geico commercial: -->Commerical Guy: Can Geico really save you on car insurance? Did the little piggy go 'whee, whee, whee' all the way home?''(Cut to piggy riding home.)'' -->Piggy: Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeee! -->Troper And Mother: '''Change the ''damn'' chanel!''' * My Dad is a seriously loud eater because he takes such large mouthfuls. If the sound wasn't annoying enough to put me off my food, then the food not always fitting surely must be. * This troper's examples: ** Digital alarm clocks. I can deal with the analog kind that ring, but the digital ones? BerserkButton! There are two kinds in particular that get to me: *** The "buzzer" that sounds like an angry insect: ---> EEEEGHH! EEEEGHH! EEEEGHH! EEEEGHH! **** This kind has actually caused me to have a [[NightmareFuel nightmare,]] in which I destroyed most of the furniture in my room with my bare hands trying to find the source of the noise, only to wake up and find out it was the alarm clock going off in real life. *** The "beeper," which keeps getting more and more urgent as if it's going to explode if you don't hit the snooze button: ---> Beep, Beep. Beep, Beep. Beep, Beep. ---> ''B-B-B-Beep! B-B-B-Beep! B-B-B-Beep!'' ---> '''BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEEP!!!''' **** Dude, I know! I friggin hate those! Unfortunately, I have one right now, because my cell doesn't work. I used to have one of the old-fashioned ones that had one long continuous ring until you pushed the button. One day, my sister decided to wake me up by putting it ''directly in my ear''. As soon as she did, though, I threw it across the room so hard that it broke into pieces when it hit the wall. Whose bed did it land on? Hers. And who had to clean it up? ''Still'' her. Needless to say, no one wakes me up anymore. **** I think I know which one you mean. My dad has one of these. Luckily, we sleep on different floors so I won't hear that [[PrecisionFStrike fucking sound]]. ** The sound of people playing their car stereos with ''way'' too much

bass. It's not even the bass itself, but the fact that every part of their hood and trunk are rattling and vibrating with that '''"BWAAAANG! BWAAAAANNNGG!"''' noise. ** People whose voices get increasingly more shrill and higher-pitched as they get angrier. I'm not even going to ''start'' caring about what's upsetting you until you stop ''shrieking at the top of your lungs.'' * This troper has a few, which he wishes would be silenced forever: ** His cat has a tendency to play with those little springy doorstops, which UNFORTUNATELY are attached to the damn door! ** His cat YOWLING for him! ** The creaking sounds made on his desk table whenever his cat (noticing a pattern?) jumps on them! ** Phone ringing. God, just let me stay busy, I don't give a frick on what you telemarketers want! * '''[[{{AxisPowersHetalia}} SHIN]][[{{Filler}} SEI]] [[{{TastesLikeDiabetes}} ROOOOOOOMMAAAAA]]''' I don't care about the rest of it, [[{{SuperlativeDubbing}} the dub is good just for taking care of this.]] * Babies crying or screaming. It makes me want to tear my ears off. I have really good ears, so all sound can be this if it's loud. * [[ThisIsSparta Every. Single. Time]] his little brother keeps calling him. * You know that tone little kids use when they're annoyed with someone? It's most often applied to the phrase "Stop IIIIIIIIIIT" but it can also be used for other words like "DOOOOOOOON'T" or "Leave me ALOOOOOOONE" * My mum's mobile phone, which she vehemntly refuses to put on silent. I'm listening to it right now as I type. * If England underperforming at the 2010 FIFAWorldCup wasn't bad enough, the vuvuzelas made it much, ''much'' worse. * Where to start... silverware scraping against plates; animal noises in general; the phone; the doorbell; people screaming; high pitched voices; loud breathing, eating, yawning, etc.; and children. Just children. Their pitch of their voices, the incessant screaming for NO REASON (mommy not getting you candy is NOT A REASON), the butchering of the English language, the tone people adopt when talking to them, the drawn out words such as "stooooooooop it" or leave me alooooooooooooooooooooone". And also: people reading in class and mispronouncing words, ignoring periods and commas, etc. ** And it all gets worse the more annoyed I get. * My five year old brother's squeaky noise he makes when he is hyper. * Whispering in a quiet room. It drove me nuts during high school when we had to read in silence and nearby peers whould whisper back and forth to each other. The best thing I could to from lashing out at them is to clog my ears with my fingers and ready quietly to myself but not in the same tone as the whisperers. * For This Troper, it's her old school's fire alarm. Imagine the sound of beautiful tropical birds...screeching. Incredibly loudly and shrilly, RIGHT IN YOUR EAR. Also, there's this bird that lives in my neighborhood. It makes a sound like "HOOO hooo...hooo..." that gets really irritating when you're trying to sleep.

** I believe the bird you're talking about is a Mourning Dove. But usually they make that noise during the morning or evening, not at night... ** It probably is, seeing as I go to sleep rather early due to my job requiring me to wake up at around 5. * This troper's little brother used to click his tongue repeatedly or hum loudly, and he seemed to know it annoyed her, worst of all. * This Troper personal most annoying noise is the USB insert/removal tone. It's a tad annoying on it's own, because, yes I know when I have removed or inserted a USB stick or device, but my laptop has a fault where every THREE SECONDS it will insist on making the noise for no appreciable reason. [[IHaveNoMouthAndIMustScream And I can't switch it off!]] * Humming. Just...humming. I don't care if it's actually in the proper key, I can't stand it. One of my old roommates loved to hum, and if we were both making food in the kitchen it was all I could do not to [[DisproportionateRetribution bash her head]] repeatedly into the counter to make her stop. Now, I did actually like this roommate--I just hate humming ''[[BeyondTheImpossible that damn much]]''. I never did ask her to stop, because I didn't want to be that insanely petty, but it drove me nuts. ** Just about ''everything'' above a certain pitch or volume, for me. People that talk loudly, whistle random off-key notes, have their radio on too loud, [[BerserkButton yell at pedestrians for no reason]], beep their horn at random pedestrians for no reason (car horns in general (cars in general)), phones, that high-pitched noise CRT [=TVs=] and monitors sometimes make that almost no one seems to hear, screaming kids, obnoxious adults, that noise a fork makes when it scrapes your plate... * This Troper has a lot, likely because of her Aspergers. List: ** Wiping off chalk from a blackboard with your hand. I heard this all the time in school when the sponge was dry and the teachers didn't feel like wetting it again... It was a slightly grating, "sandy" sounding, torture for my ears, and I cringed whenever they did that. Luckily, my high school uses an electronic blackboard and sponge. ** Also, generic alarm clock beeps. I can't stand them at all, that's why I prefer music or something. ** All high-pitched noises, especially screaming. At middle school, some people found this out and though it was really funny to shriek out high and shrill screams whenever they were around me or INTO MY EARS because of this. Needless to say, it became sort of a BerserkButton quickly. ** I've grown to hate the sound of the phone having low battery. A horrible bleeping sound. ** FORKS/KNIVES SCRAPING AGAINST THE PLATE. Ugh. ** Screaming babies on buses/trains/EVERYWHERE is pretty much a given. Especially when the parents don't try doing anything to stop them. ** Little kid laughter and yelling in the morning(weekends and vacations mostly). I want to sleep as long as possible, and after that just slack off in bed in the morning, dammit. ** The mosquito ringtone. If I hear that fucking ringtone one more time...

** Pretty much ANY internet advertisements with sounds that starts by itself and you have to go and turn the sound off yourself. (Deviantart, for example, had a bunch of these a while ago, luckily they seem to have disappeared now.) Although the sound/music in itself might not be too annoying by itself, it will be after I heard it 100 times. *** Now there's one at Neopets that sometimes plays before you can play a flash game, and it's been there for some months now. You have to either wait until it's done(and you can't even turn off the sound) or refresh the page to get it away ** The sound of a recorder. gaaaaaah *** What do you have against the [[Series/DoctorWho Second Doctor?]] ** Not a sound, but when someone sings loudly to a song they don't know, and just make up random gibberish. Either learn the words or just hum that part or something. ** The beeping sound that washing machines and dishwashers send out when they are done. High-pitched, annoying beeps. ** The standard Nokia tune, including remixes. * A few ones for [[@/{{endlessness}} me]]: ** The Windows 7 start-up chime. Specially when, during a class, 5 or 6 people turn their laptops on. ** The beeping sound that [=UPSes=] make. ** The sound of clicking relays. ** Hard drives. Just... hard drives. One of the reasons why I wait for [=SSDs=] to become cheaper. * For [[@/{{Midna}} me]], those [=SmileyCentral=] ads that activate a voice clip when you roll over them. Every time I hear that fscking "''OH MY GAWD! '''NO WAY!'''''", I want to fly over to where whoever recorded that line lives and kick him in the nuts. ** SECONDED. From the day I first saw that advertisement, I hated it. (Can't remember having seen in in the past years, though... here's to hoping they've just stopped using it.) * This troper can't stand the sound of someone rubbing their hands together (as in, to try to get them warmed up). I have no idea why, but even ''thinking'' about that sound causes me to get shivers down my back, and to cringe like I just heard fingernails on a chalkboard. Also, when someone is chewing with their mouth open. And forks scraping against plates. * In this tropers Art and History classes at school, there are these two girls who in unison have this weird clucking-high pitched screechy laugh which every time I hear it makes me want to turn around and scream at them to shut up. Also, This tropers Maths class all find it hilarious to oink like pigs in unison, especially this one particular boy who in addition to the oinking likes to make really loud random wailing noises at random intervals for no particular reason. Another [[CampGay friend]] of mine also likes to make [[DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything suggestive moaning noises]] all the time for some reason which I have politely asked him to stop doing several times. Lastly, listening to Radio 1 in Textiles class with the constant "WEEEEEEEEY!" and deliberately bad singing along to popular songs. * I find Sarah Palin's voice to be incredibly grating.

* Can I put down an entry for "Most Annoying Thing Ever To Appear On My Laptop Screen" instead? It's those adverts for ''One Born Every Minute.'' They make me sick. Helloooooo, I do '''NOT''' like having to see pictures of [[FanDisservice screaming women in labor]] every time I open a new window. Where the [[PrecisionFStrike fuck]] did they get the idea that pictures of screaming women in labor would make people want to see the stupid show?!? * This troper still hasn't fully emptied this trope from his system. The most annoying sound from his voice? [[ShapedLikeItself His '''voice.''']] * Since high school marching band, this troper has absolutely LOATHED "Land of 1,000 Dances." EVERY OTHER SONG WAS THAT ONE, all because a few really obnoxious players in the mellophone section kept wanting our director to choose it. * For this troper: the sound of stinkbugs. They fly around her ceiling fan light making this ridiculous buzzing sound, banging their heads against the lights, then bounce off the walls and land. Thankfully, most of them aren't smart enough to land somewhere where I can get them with a tissue and throw them away. But those that are force me to go through several repetitions of the above before I can get rid of them * Despite being deaf in my left ear, [[{{Tropers/STK}} this troper]] has a VERY sinsitive right ear. So high-pitched beeping, alarms, loud repetitive sounds, and '''''screaming''''' (unless it's a well-done MetalScream) are [[PrecisionFStrike fucking]] unbearable to listen to. * "Ear rape" videos on Youtube are of course ''meant'' to be this, and if you come across one unexpected while, say, having full volume and speakers... it sounds kind of like [[ItTastesLikeFeet being anally raped with a rusty chainsaw.]] [[{{Metaphorgotten}} Only that it's in the ears.]] * This troper's brother does NOT KNOW HOW TO DRINK NORMALLY. It's disgusting. He gulps and you can hear it going down. He also chews his food this way, and he snorts ALL THE TIME and clears his throat, and kind of rattles in the back of his mouth when he breathes. She gets so disgusted and annoyed that it's hard to eat in the same room with him. He hums constantly as well, with no direction. All of this just make this troper want to rip his throat out so he can STOP CLEARING IT. * EVERYWHERE at my school: [[PrettyFlyForAWhiteGuy "GIT SUM!"]] * Anyone that plays Neopets at the moment, or has played it during the last few months, will know what I'm talking about when I say "that [[PrecisionFStrike fucking]] Spongebob advertisement", which goes under the "advertisements with sound" category. [[{{Narm}} "NOW AT THE NICK ARCADE, WHERE SHARKY TWO-TIMES IS TRYING TO TAKE OVER BIKINI BOTTOM!"]] I'm starting up a bunch of games, then at a random time BAM, advertisement that has to play before I play the game! And you usually have to refresh one or two times to make it go away when it's there. * The sound my mother's windshield wipers make. I don't know why. It's only her car, too. * For this tropette it's the sound of JustinBieber singing. That, hearing girls {{squee}} over him, and my sister playing Fire Burnin' over and over and over and over and [[OverlyLongGag over and over and

over...]] * I personally find the sound of people chewing egregiously fucking annoying. Especially if they're gaping at your computer's screen over your shoulder. For all I know, though, my chewing is fucking annoying too and I'm just deaf to it. * There was something about the alarm from an old alarm clock [[{{Tropers/Kadorhal}} I]] used once that ''really'' got to me. And then, there was an episode of ''[[GhostInTheShellStandAloneComplex Stand Alone Complex]]'' where a guy with a cyberbrain was searching for something in a book, and every time he ''didn't'' find it, ''the exact same sound from my alarm clock played''. This went on for about a full minute, after which I got rid of my alarm clock and stopped watching SAC. * My current annoyance is that Duck Sauce / BarbraStreisand song, a "song" that [[BeyondTheImpossible manages to top]] [[TakeThat Justin]] [[{{Hatedom}} Bieber]] in terms of annoyingness. Sure, I could just not listen to it... that is, unless a group in our class had to use it for the video projects they made... TWICE. (Actually, the second time is now.) Of course, this means they have to play it OVER AND OVER, just to see what the film's like... plus even MORE playing when showing it to others. It [[EarWorm sticks in your head]], too... and adding [[UpToEleven all this together]] just makes me want to choke puppies. * Anyone who owns a cat accustomed to being fed in the morning knows what happens whenever you try to sleep in. Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow! Meow! Meow! ''Meow! Meow! Meow!'' * I agree with the people who mentioned screaming (babies, rock stars, etc.), barking dogs, lip-smacking, snot-snuffling, vomiting...and probably some others I forgot. My little sister ''chews liquids'', and the sound she makes...well, I had to ask her to leave my room when she was drinking milk. It sounds like a dog drinking (which, incidentally, is another sound I can't stand). The sound of turds dropping into the toilet also grosses me out...and rap. They call that stuff MUSIC?! I have yet to hear any rap that doesn't want to make me run out of the building. Interestingly, this trope has been more or less averted for me in video games; Baby Mario's crying in Yoshi's Island, the bad voice acting in Mega Man 8, and even [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FJTK_iNA5s BURN! BURN! BURN TO THE GROUND!]] don't really bother me all that much. I can laugh at the latter two besides. * [[@/AwesomeZombie22 This Troper]] wants to ''[[DisproportionateRetribution murder every baby]]'' because of their constant wailing. I swear, the sound of a baby crying is playing on repeat in the elevators of my personal hell. Young kids are no better on the ears, but babies are worse because you ''can't shut them up.'' I even made a ''swear to chastity,'' and the never ending whining of a baby is a huge part of that. ** [[Tropers/TheGDude Seconded.]] * Every once in a while, my mom forgets to turn off her alarm clock. Her room is right next to mine, with pretty terrible walls, and she gets up far earlier than me. It emits a [[HellIsThatNoise highpitched, incredibly irritating]] beep ''[[CriticalAnnoyance

constantly]]'' and will not stop, no matter how long it's gone on, until it's been turned off. * As much as it is a TruthInTelevision, this troper hates his parents' alarm clock. It makes a beeping sound constantly [[CriticalAnnoyance and it drones on and on every second]]. Another sound that's annoying to this troper is the sound of pencils (or pens) tapping. * This troper's high school has a special event every year which you are supposed to raise money for. The thing is, we weren't doing as much work as we should have. How did the staff respond? Changing the bells. The first time, they made this incredibly irritating noise that sounded like static, except way more irritating. It was LOUD too. Then they saw everybody was turning down their room volumes from this, so they went with something that the teachers wouldn't bother turning down their volumes for - the Friday song. The first time, they only played the intro to it. So we didn't think it would be too bad. [[{{Understatement}} We were wrong.]] The next passing period, they played the ''[[JumpingTheShark whole. Stinking. Song.]]'' [[CrossesTheLineTwice And they did it the following passing period too.]] It was making everybody less tempted to raise money and more tempted to punch somebody. * "Sometimes life can get in the way of your education. Sometimes school can get in the way of your life." Dammit [=YouTube,=] I just want to watch my stupid video! Is that too much to ask, that you don't play the stupid online university ad every single time I feel like listening to my favorite Dragonforce song?! * Every musician ever, repeat after me: Feedback is not a musical instrument! ** Also, so much good music has been ruined with the vocals either wholly or partially sounding like the vocalist is possessed by ''demons''. * This troper was at a camp once. We were all divided into cabins with different animal names to represent each, and we were the coyotes. Every cabin had to come up with a chant, and ours was, "C-O-Y-O-T-E-S, coyotes are the best!" followed by a howl. It very quickly got on the nerves of the other cabins due to how often we did it. We would always try to chant when we passed a cabin, who would try to chant louder than us but fail. It got to the point to where I was hearing people mock our chant. * The voices of Vocaloids. They're a computer, for goodness sakes! * Children that cry and beg. There's nothing worse than browsing the shelves of a Gamestop (don't judge me,) and listening to a 10 year old kid cry to their moms because she won't buy them Mortal Kombat. Whats worse is that the parents never tell their kids to stop. If it was my kid I'd have smacked them so hard their eyes would switch places. But I also hate kids in general. * The door alarms in the Bella Guerin Hall of Residence at the University of Ballarat, which go off if the door is held open too long. It's especially painful when the person holding the door open is having a conversation and doesn't even react to the alarm. On one recent occasion this prompted a loud and firm "[[ThisIsSparta Get Out of the Doorway]]!" from me after a few seconds of it. * The sound of people kissing. It makes this troper physically sick

and has made her throw up on occasion. I can't tell my best friends who are all lovey-dovey this though. I just have to sit there and pretend I'm not feel like barfing all over the table. * The sound that squeaky toys make. This troper felt very very unnerved after she got a puppy in 4th Grade who chewed those things loudly ''and'' obnoxiously... * You know those banner ads that have sound when you scroll over them? I keep encountering one that's ''supposed'' to do that, but is much more annoying than the regular kind, because of what I assume is a peculiar bug: Instead of being silent until you mouse over, it starts playing this weird, muffled orchestral music as soon as the ad appears - the effect is sort of like what happens if you encode a song at the lowest possible bitrate. The music ''does'' become regular once you mouse over the ad, by the way. It crops up often enough to be annoying, and it doesn't help that the distorted version of the song is actually sort of creepy sounding. * This troper has Asperger's, so I definitely am sensitive to sounds. The two most awful for me? ** Alarm clocks. I hate that BEEP BEEP BEEP noise. Partly because it's so annoying, partly because I hate getting up in the morning more than almost anything else. I tense up and feel like my day is going to suck. ** Screaming babies/children. I work as a cashier in a grocery store, and every day I hear "MOM! MOM! I WANT THIS!" "No, you can't have it, put it back!" "BUT I WANT IT! NOOOOO! WAAAAAA!" Multiply that by 8 hours and you have an idea of my day. * My alarm clock. Having to listen to it [[ThisIsSparta EVERY. SINGLE. MORNING.]] Daaaaagh! Thank [[UnusualEuphemism GAR]] for summer vacation. * Ripping burr. It causes this [[Gamebreaking troper]] chills every time he hears it. ** Also, the sound our extremely noisy coffee grinder make. That damn drilling. * This troper's brother has a drum set that he keeps in the living room. He sometimes just sits at it and absentmindedly beats on it with his sticks for ''hours''. No matter how many times you ask him to stop, he'll just keep on banging. It's awful. * At my uncle's house, there is a security system that informs you whenever a door is opened. For example, if the back door is open, a robotic-sounding voice says "Back door" every few seconds as long as it is open. However, sometimes it just ''keeps saying'' this even if the door is closed. It gets annoying hearing "Basement door" [pause] "Basement door" [repeat]. * Edgy here. I work in a home office in the South so, of course, a number of my co-workers have Southern accents. Some of the ladies here speak in such a way, they pronounce the letter "S" with a loud but brief hiss. OH MY GOD! It's annoying! ---Return to MostAnnoyingSound! Return to MostAnnoyingSound! Return to MostAnnoyingSound! Return to MostAnnoyingSound! Return to MostAnnoyingSound! ** '''SHUT UP!'''

*** ''WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!'' ----

MostWonderfulSound * Open this; http://www.rainymood.com/, first tab of Smooth. Then this; http://www.endlessyoutube.com/watch?v=HMnrl0tmd3k Second tab of Cool. Finally; http://www.endlessyoutube.com/watch?v=DIx3aMRDUL4, Last tab of Classy. ** These sounds together are really great. It makes me think of classy men sitting in a mahogany paneled bar sipping on scotch and brandy while smoking pipes or cigars. Super classy. ** This troper just needs to thank the original troper for this. Seriously, I've got these bookmarked and I think I might do this on a daily basis now. ** Seconded, the troper who posted these three sounds is a beautiful person. ** Where has this been my whole life? Whoever posted this, I love you. Mmmmm, I could totally fall asleep to this.... * Similarly to how certain gaming sounds are wired directly to this troper's OhCrap reflex, certain sounds are also wired to her Oh Yay reflex. For example: in the middle of an intense KingdomHearts battle, having anyone call out "Sora!" qualifies because it means either somebody's just healed me and I can keep giving it my all, or the game's gone into MercyMode and has sent Mickey Mouse to my aid. The sound the Cure spells makes also qualifies. ** A lot of melodies also qualify. Xion's theme, Sanctuary, and Nana Mizuki's Pray all dominate my iTunes Top 25 for a reason. ** Also, the chime that plays when you complete a puzzle in TheLegendOfZelda games. * The shattering sound of a successful Soul Crush in [[SoulSeries Soul Calibur 4]] is music to [[Tropers.ReikoKazama this troper]]'s ears, because she knows ''exactly what it means''... '''''[++[[LimitBreak CRITICAL]] [[OneHitKill FINISH]] [[CurbStompBattle TIME,]] [[ThisIsForEmphasisBitch BITCHES!]]++]''''' Unless, of course - and it's a rare occasion - she happens to be on [[OhCrap the]] [[ThisIsGonnaSuck receiving]] [[OneHitKill end]]... * For this troper, [[EverythingsCuterWithKittens cats]]. "Meow!" ** This troper woke up a 2AM to that sound outside his window. And he didn't mind at all. ** Thirded with this ailurophilic troper. Especially with the "chirrup" greeting sound and purring. ** [[SincerityMode I want to wake up to a cat nagging me for breakfast every morning <3]] * [[{{Gabel}} This troper]] plays guitar and movies and is used to working with audio. A lot of things sounds AMAZING through a condenser mic. Like feet on leaves, footsteps on wooden floor (especially if it's male heels that you use with a suit) and most of all somebody chewing. Oh and speaking of music, a good guitar with a cranked up tube amp beats few thing. Except perhaps a really good EQ'ed bass kick live (when you get that thump inside you and still hear a lot of attack).

* This troper being a gun nut, his comforting sounds include the sound of a SMLE's bolt action being worked as well as just the sound of a magazine being loaded. No particular reason for the second one, but 1911-pattern pistols' magazine catches make an awesome noise. * Rain. This troper lives in a state that's been in drought for as long as she can remember, so rain on the roof is a beautiful thing to hear. ** [[http://www.rainymood.com/ You may enjoy this then.]] *** I love you. ** This troper lives in South-East Queensland, which only a few years ago was in such a severe drought we were down to 160 litres of water a day, and the major dam in the region was at less than 20%. As of October 2010, we've had to release some of the water and had almost a week of rain. Especially rain at night, when you're falling asleep... * This troper loves the sound of squeaky clean teeth. * The ice cream truck. A cheap rendition of Turkey in the Straw has never sounded so good! * "[[LapPillow Mmmmmm...]]" (Although I have many more Most Wonderful Feelings...) * For this Troper - Windows Starting Up. Because it means another funfilled day of gaming... Haha... ** This troper takes it a step further: Her boyfriend customized her laptop(An Acer Aspire running Windows 7) so that it's start-up tune is the mac start-up used for {{WALL-E}}'s fully-charged sound, a movie that both he and I hold dear(especially since we met on a forum dedicated to it). * For this troper: The varying audible responses (moans, sighs, etcetera.) someone gives when he or she is being massaged. Really makes you feel like what you're doing has that little special effect on people. Also: The sounds around you when you relax in a forest or on a meadow. Birds chirping, winds through the leaves or the grass, insects buzzing, all that. * This troper can listen to MichellePhan's makeup tutorials for hours. Infact, he has. Sometimes I get odd looks from family who notice that I'm watching a tutorial on women's make up, but her voice is just that pleasing. Here's a link, for those curious: http://www.youtube.com/user/MichellePhan ** This troper (who usually shows nothing but contempt when the topic makeup is brought up) is glad to learn he's not alone in that. *** [[Tropers/TroperOnAStickV2 This troper]] will third the opinion. * [[Tropers/TsukasaElkKite this troper]] thinks that the most wonderful sounds in the world are the sounds of her girlfriend's voice and the sound of her friend Matt's voice (he has a lovely accent). <3 * For me, the most wonderful sound in existence is the surging of an aircraft's engines as it prepares for take-off. Well I guess it shouldn't be too surprising, considering I come from a long line of pilots - my great-great-grandfather was the second person in South Africa to learn how to fly (he was taught by the Wright Brothers themselves)! He flew with what was then called the Royal South African Air Force during World War I, my grandfather flew during World War II, and my father's also a pilot (though he never served in the Air Force, his cousin did). All of that means that I've been around aircraft

since early childhood, and aircraft engines (both jet and propellor) bring back a lot of good memories for me. * For [[Tropers/{{Dallenson}} This troper]], it's sounds of engines, Like Muscle cars, Vintage aircraft, jets and afterburners, Tanks you name it unlike those Hybrid-cars ** Its also the sounds of certain guns when Either Firing or being reloaded/pumped/or Readied. *** Of course these are mostly from [[{{bangbangBANG}} Live action TV or Video games]] ({{Stargate Atlantis}}'s P90 for example) *** The A-10 T-bolts [[{{More Dakka}} GAU-18]] chain gun works too ** the sounds of the weapons in [[{{Command and Conquer}} Renegade]] stand out for Him like when one of the tanks is being reloaded ** And {{Planet side}}'s Aircraft, and vehicle Weapons, Engines * This Troper has nothing but love for the sounds in coffee shops which would annoy others - hissing espresso makers, screaming blenders, and clinking porcelain. ** This troper too. They almost seem to give of a air of warmth, cosiness, the present (???), and activity. * there's something about an active air conditioner or fan that this troper finds relaxing, probably the fact that it drowns out other noises. as such, she always has one running when she goes to sleep, even in the wintertime * This troper loves to walk in fresh snow, and hates slush - because slush doesn't make that wonderful crunching noise when you step in it. She's also seconding the above troper who likes the sound of rain. * The cracking noise hard-cover books make when you open them for the first time. * [[YourMileageMayVary Your mileage will definitely vary]], but this troper absolutely loves the sound of knuckles/back/neck popping. Most satisfying sound ever. ** Oh, this troper HATED that sound at an early age, but since he does it to his hands and neck in the morning, it's more of a relief than seething pain. * The squeak of an MP-89 train from the [[LeMetropolitain Paris Mtro 14]] leaving the station, or the buzz of a Z 20500 from RER D, or the whizzing sound of a Citadis T2 tramway, all of that bring fond memories of Paris to this editor. ** In the same vein, The "dou-dou-douuuuu" 3 to 5 note takeoff noise of a Montreal Metro MR-73 train. Also heard on two older MR-63 trains used as prototypes. These two are much louder and a real treat to find. * Noisy mousewheels. That crunchy sound they make... daaaamn. Even mousewheelup is good, but ''especially'' mousewheeldown. I'm not a programmer or a hacker, but if there's anything that can put me in a "computery" mood, it's scrolling the mousewheel down. Best sound ever. * Remember when TV's had dials? This [[Tropers/{{Burstkiller}} 1985born troper]] remembers them. Especially the "tunk" or "teek" the dials made everytime you changed the channel. ** Or the sound of loading a cartridge console. * If your pet has ever run away, the most wonderful sound is the sound of them announcing that they've come back. * Nearly any "coin inserted" sound in an arcade game. Sometimes on

MAME, I'll spam the coin insert button just to hear it repeatedly. * Heavy breathing, for [[FetishFuel less-than-innocent reasons]]. * YourMileageMayVary, but this troper has put DVD episodes of MST3K on TV at night to fall asleep to. Nothing soothes his ears than the gentle sound of riffing. ** And then in Brawl, when HE gets the chance use Jigglypuff's Final Smash, that weird sound when she grows to nearly half the stage size is worth it. * This troper is somehow charmed by the 'ting!' sound a typewriter makes before it... does that... cool [[BuffySpeak rewind-a-majig]]. Also when this troper got lost in New York of all places, it was terrifying, and hearing my family's voices after who knows how many minutes/hours made me want to cry. ** On the subject of typewriters, the 'clack clack clack' noise they make when you type is pretty sweet. * This HappilyMarried troper's most wonderful sound is her husband singing. To clarify, her husband is a great music lover...but horribly tone deaf. He sings enthusiastically but badly, so he will not sing where anyone can hear him except his wife. When he's singing, he's happy and content, so to Troper, it really is a good sound. * As any shutterbug will tell you, the sound of a DSLR camera's shutter click. It's amongst the reasons why this troper hauls around her monster of a camera instead of pocketing a point-and-shoot; the pre-recorded ka-chic is ''just not the same''. * What? No one else likes the sound of a heartbeat? Shame. * [[Tropers/{{FearTheWolf}} This troper]] is going to show himself as a complete anorak for this one... but steam locomotives, particularly if being worked hard. The sound of internal combustion has NOTHING on that. ** For an example, [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QpQSFMK3F80 Moguls 2968 and 7325 climb the Lickey Incline]] (the steepest gradient on the British mainline, so [[{{Understatement}} they're working quite hard]]). * The sound that soda bottles make when you open them, * My best friend's laugh <3 * For This Troper it is the sound of a busy street. I just love to sit back relax with a book and listen to the buzz of a street. * The whistling of a teakettle, because it means you're about to enjoy a hot, tasty drink. ^_^ * For this Troper, it's hearing the sound of his pen pal's voice over Skype...[[SensualSlavs She has an accent.]] * When you're working with molten glass to make something like a paperweight and you have it on the end of the rod, and it's cooling really fast, it starts making this totally amazing clack noise when you use the jackknife on it. * For @/DesertDragon, it's the sound of birds and insects in early spring. There's this one that I always listen for; I have no idea what animal makes this noise, but it's a low, clicky "Eeeeeeeeeeee" (I live in the Midwestern United States, if anyone knows). Hearing that call is always my personal signifier that winter is over. The sounds of nature have always been my favorite part about living in the suburbs and the countryside, since you don't really get that in the city

(those bird call generators don't help at all, since they sound so fake once you pick up on the patterns). ** A [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x640eqzhMEo&feature=fvwrel Cicada]]? * The music in Super Mario Galaxy(1 and 2). It's beautiful. * My girlfriend's voice. She has a soft and sweet voice and I could listen to her talk all day long. * This one's weird, but the sound of rustling papers. * This Troper likes the sound of storms. It might scare some people, but I like listening to the rain, wind, and thunder. Also, who's played Super Mario RPG? That game has some ''awesome'' sound samples, such as the clarinet and bassoon in [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j4ByWdGulPI this]], the marimba in [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9dM-hX5cds&feature=related this]], and the organ in [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQ3tshJyI4A&feature=related this]]. On that note (no pun intended), I really like the sound of low woodwind instruments in general, both in real life and in video games. * The sound of a space shuttle being launched. Oh my god. That roar is one of the very few sounds that literally makes me feel weak in the knees. * To this troper, the sound of rain is one, just because it's so peaceful. Another is the crunch your boots make as you cross fresh snow, partly because she associates it with beautiful, pristine winter landscapes in the crisp air. * "BIG EIGHTIES WEEKEND! Mix Ninety-siiiix!" Tulsa's got one of the best radio stations ever. * My cat makes the most unusual noise ever, it's sort of bubbly with a hint of a meow. We've nicknamed her space cat because of how alien it sounds. She also chirps like a bird whenever she sees an animal outside. * WCCO's theme. Ah, the nostalgia of my favorite Minnesota radio station's all-vocal tune. * For [[{{Tropers/RAMChYLD}} this troper]], it's the single beep of his computers (or the ''bong'' noise on his only Macintosh) shortly before the screen flashes to life. [[HellIsThatNoise Glass shattering and long multiple beeps however...]] * [[{{Squee}} My two-year-old niece singing the WonderPets theme song.]] * This troper will argue for the sound of snow falling. It totally has a sound! Also, wet tires on pavement, which makes me feel safe, as long as I don't think too much about it. * For this troper, there was a time when the {{Facebook}} IM sound was this, because 99% of incoming IM's would come from his (now-ex) girlfriend. ---The sound of your mouse clicking on this link is the MostWonderfulSound ever! ----

MostWritersAreAdults

* I used to work at a company that handled entertainment licences, and the rationale for this trope was this: if you aim a concept at 16 year olds, kids younger than 16 will embrace it to be "cool" but anyone older than 16 wouldn't be caught dead seeing it. Aiming the show slightly older is a demographic scoop aimed at broadening the potential audience for it. ''KimPossible'' did this well - it was a show aimed at tweens, but as it was technically a high school show, you could watch it without completely feeling like a pedophile. * [[Tropers/{{Nani}} I]] avert this trope. I'm 13, and I write short stories that people in the generation above me enjoy. ---Most tropers agree that MostWritersAreAdults. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MotorMouth * This Troper normally speaks slowly and carefully, thinking about every word. Whenever she's having any kind of an oral exam she activates the Nitro and turns into a MotorMouth. Teachers are usually so surprised they don't even bother to listen what actually is she saying. * This troper has seen people do this plenty of times. One point where I did this myself was when I saw a spy in ''TeamFortress 2'' and panicked; -->@/{{Bisected8}}: There'saspyinthesewer nowaithe'satthetop nohe'scoembackin Ineedtocalmdowndon'tI? Waithe'scomingout...nevermindgothim!\\ ...Afterwards, several other players on my team commented that they'd never heard someone talk so quickly. * ThisTroper is a bit of a MotorMouth herself, often having to slow things down for her friends who didn't quite get it the first time. * ThisTroper occasionally takes a turn into MotorMouth territory, typically when he has a very short time to say something and his slight grammatical OCD kicks in, meaning he has to finish a complete and correct sentence before he allows himself to shut up. * This troper tends to speak quite quickly, and his speech tends to speed up when he gets exited, eventually becoming night incomprehensible. * This troper usually speaks very quickly, but when he is talking in class sometimes he can be completely incomprehensible. * This one mixes fast speech with so-called [[SesquipedalianLoquaciousness "big" or "SAT-only" words]] in presentations, which leaves one half of an audience terribly confused and the other half amused at the first half. At least this one gives a warning that he talks fast. * When giving a presentation to the class, this troper has been known to speak in what can only be described as a Dr. Cox rant with a liberal amount of Buffy speak mixed in. * This troper occasionally wanders into this trope (her tendency towards SesquipedalianLoquaciousness does not help), especially after

watching ''ZeroPunctuation'', but she once had a friend whose MotorMouth made her TheUnintelligible a lot of the time. "Uh-huh" is a useful response when you have no idea what was just said to you, although this troper occasionally wondered if she was going to wind up agreeing to something she wasn't keen on doing. Also, a recent quote... --> '''Troper's Mom:''' You need ''spaces'' between your words! * This troper's cousins. And guess what? They're from Irapuato, Mexico, a place where Motor Mouth is the regional accent. ''Zing!'' ** And he also feels like Canadian French is basically Motor Mouth French. "Pouvez-vous me donner du fromage et du saucisson, s'il vous plat?", for example, becomes "Pouvouzm'donndufroma etpisleduscisson silvouplaitl&#65533; ?". * [[JBridge This troper]] tends to go into Motor Mouth mode after talking for a little while. What makes it worse is that I tend to slur when I do this, and correct my self, still keeping my voice at a steady 120 bpm. * This troper falls into this often. He often has to repeat himself, and its especially bad whenever he has "verbal car-wreck" and stutters for what seems like a few hours. * This troper is the only person in the world able to decipher his sister's motor mouth mode, and vice versa. Coupled with an amazingly compatible sense of humour and mindset, allowing us to set up hooks knowing that the other will take it up and taking the other person's speech and running with it, our reunions are truly epic. Sadly, it all rubs off with time. "That is so incredibly dumb. I'd've said the same." * [[DarkInsanity13 This troper]] speaks faster when she's nervous or on a particularly lengthy tangent, and with that she also slips on her words a lot more. See TroperTales/PorkyPigPronunciation * This troper is consistently annoyed and confused by the number of times he has to repeat himself to classmates and interlocutors, because the speed he considers to be 'normal' apparently is 'bloody fast' to others. * [[GwenStacyWannabe This troper]] is often told by...well, ''everybody'', that she needs to slow down when she's saying something. Usually her problem is that her brain is moving too fast for her mouth to keep up, or else she's [[CaffeineBulletTime hyper]] or nervous. * This troper is a MotorMouth that stuns and surprises most people with her verbal skills and vocabulary. She believes this to be an occurrence of BlessedWithSuck, however, as her brain often outruns her mouth. She tends to get caught up in her own ranting sometimes, until those points where she just randomly stops speaking mid-sentence. Imagine speaking about 100 words a minute, while your brain is going about 700. * Also, [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eM6zPikfOEs This lady.]] * I see your individual and group experiences and raise a whole ''nationality'' of motor mouths. Chileans are known for being almost incomprehensible to those that know standard Spanish due to heavy use of local variations and quick speech. (I heard it's why there's so few Chilean news anchors in the international scene...). Of course, some

speak even faster... (Me, for example) ** I am Chilean and half the time people don't understand me because I speak too fast,have poor enunciation or both. *** {{Dexter}} claims in one book that Cubans are very hard for speakers of standard Spanish to understand due to speed and a tendency to drop consonants. Can someone with a better knowledge of the subject than I have confirm or refute this? ** In a class in my (Chilean) University we were joined for a semester by an exchange student from Per. She commented that she had quite a hard time trying to understand our language, at least the first days. Mind you, Spanish is the official language of both Per and Chile, and not only that, we are neighbor countries. According to her, most of the difficulty was in how fast we speak. The remaining component was the heavy use of local constructions and the swearing. Oh God, the swearing. *** I'm Chilean and I'm often told I have a motor mouth plus poor diction and pronunciation problems, so understanding me isn't particularly easy .plus despite living here my entire life, I have a strange accent,like I've lived abroad. strangely, I'm better in English. * When This Troper gets excited, he tends to forget words, and forgets more when talking faster. e.g Heyheyheyguesswhat?Huhguesswhat?Thethingwiththethingworkedwiththething andthething. I've actually said that. * [[{{Kriegsmesser}} This troper]] has teased his friend as an "amateur MotorMouth". Why? In the middle of one of her rants, she stopped to ''breathe''. * [[PG556 This troper]] is more than able to recite End of the World and One Week from memory, though there are issues with oxygen management... also, when the BerserkButton is hit due to someone saying something really stupid, he can go for a full minute, without breath, rambling extremely quickly about why they FailAtLogic. Also, be careful asking him about specific ZeroPunctuation reviews or sections from HitchHikersGuideToTheGalaxy (although that isn't said as quickly) * In this troper's comedy club, he is renowned for playing a MotorMouth for laughs. * This troper's been like this for as long as she can remember. It gets worse when she's reading from something, due to her being a speed reader as well. She's gotten faster with age, to the point where she's started tripping over her words because her mouth muscles can't match the pace of her train of thought. It's not without its perks, though-she was crowned "Queen of the Tongue Twisters" in elementary school, and was able to get certain solos in Chorus because ''no one else could sing that fast''. * Recently this troper has gotten comments like "Slow down!" from her parents, because apparently she speaks VERY fast, especially when excited. It's gotten to the point where she and her friends speak so amazingly quick that no one else is able to follow their conversations. ** When she and her classmates had to do a 'radio program' for a project, they had to create a commercial as well. She had to do the

closer speech (you know, the one about dangers and fine print) because she was the only one who could speak fast enough. * This troper has a habit of doing this when excited. Unfortunately, she has to think about what she says before she speaks and usually ends up going at superspeed for about 10 seconds before getting hopeless tongue-tied and ending her rant with 'bugger it I can't talk today' * Odd variant with this troper. Her thought process runs so fast she can barely keep up with it verbally. She will speak very fast and verbosely...and then stop speaking mid-sentence all of a sudden, sometimes for up to two minutes. She also forgets what it was she was thinking and saying sometimes. * This troper gets short-tempered with motormouths, especially if they interrupt. Once I was interrupted just as I was finishing a statement, and turned around and cut him off right back, "Say, before you go stepping on my lines again, did you notice how my anecdotes are ''brief'', and come to a ''point''?" That shut him up for the rest of the party. * [[NegativeZero This troper]] + MotorMouth + weird accent + attempts to replace weird accent with foreign one (not kidding) + CloudCuckoolander = wtf!? * This troper has a bad habit of doing this, as well as the majority of her friends (Birds of a feather and all that...). It even pops up when she's ''writing by hand'', her print is really small and messy because she tries to do it too fast. * On grad night, this troper and her friends decided it would be fun to take the bus to the afterparty. While waiting at the stop, she and her best friend struck up a conversation with one of the people waiting there - a young man smoking an, er, unusually pungent cigarette. The best friend launched into an anecdote of something that had happened during the dance, and when it was over there was a long pause from the young man, who then said, "You talk faster than anyone I have ever met." * This university student troper thinks it's a good way to pass exams if you haven't the best knowledge. Just motormouth everythink you know about the subject and some random technobabble/gobbledygook/whatever (depends on subject, is it technical or humanitarian), and the professor will think you know the subject. * This Troper has a tendenacy to start talking for long stretchs and as a result, will speed up to the point that other people have a very hard time understanding. * This troper has a massive motor mouth. Get me going on a subject, any subject, that I know something about, and you'd be hard pressed to understand what I'm saying. I often garble words or lapse into BuffySpeak because of this. And my mind runs about thirty times faster. * This troper has a strange speech pattern that involves this...except sometimes I suddenly stop mid-sentence so my mouth can register the next chunk of info from my brain. * For this troper, it become so bad that he had to see a speech therapist to help with it (granted, it wasn't just because of this trope, but it was the largest contributor) - it extends into his

writing and typing, too; while the speech therapy helped the other problems, this one has become dominate [[SesquipedalianLoquaciousness and causes another problem]]. The troper above who said that "...speaking about 100 words a minute, while your brain is going about 700" has my sympathy, and seems to have a similar problem. * This troper's friend talks almost incomprehensibly fast (accompanied by excited... hand... flapping...) whenever she explains the obscure scientific terms she brings up in daily conversation. * This Troper is one, and also speaks with bizarre hand movements, when she is excited or nervous...well, actually, it's just most of the time. Her mind works faster, however, and so she often jumbles words and meanings, and often ends up explaining things with not very precise adjectives. Like [[Series/DoctorWho timey-wimey wibbly-wobbly stuff]]. * I talk very fast, using overly long words, very loudly and with my incomprehensible accent (to people who don't know me). Due to this people just nod and laugh weakly when I try to tell jokes. * This troper apparently does it whenever he orders food. Anywhere. It is not a good habit. * This trope never is able to finish a sentence without someone going slow down. Her teacher even said she's the fastest motor mouth she's met. * A friend of this troper was once told that he'd improved a lot in the last year. But, he needed to slow down when he talked. This troper couldn't make another thing than laugh at him. * This troper was recently diagnosed with [[AttentionDeficitOohShiny ADD]], and now takes medication that notably improves his performance. . .with motormouthing as a side effect. Not because he has more energy, but because the increased mental focus means "more trains of thought reach their stations" and he thus has alot more to say. The effect this had on his speech (When combined with an existing tendency to rush through sentences) didn't fully register [[MyGodWhatHaveIDone until he recorded himself speaking and played it back]]. * [[SharmHedgehog I]] am well known for writing colossal walls of text on the Internet when I really shouldn't, much to the frustration of my cohorts who believe that I could easily abridge all my information but I instead choose not to leave out a single word that might possibly describe the current situation. And usually, whenever I try to explain this unfortunate habit I end up creating yet another wall of text, only creating much more frustration, especially since my explanation is extremely overacted and feels like I forced it out for the sole purpose of creating humour, but I could just as easily apologize rather than create yet another wall of text in the process. I have attempted to control this bad habit, but I still find myself slipping into it sometimes as I feel that no small tidbit can be left out, since if you leave one out you could end up creating an incomprehensible trainwreck, much like any dialogue I write on the Internet or even written down in real life. It is especially annoying in those chat rooms with very narrow margins, because a normally-short message ends up becoming a huge block that most people are too impatient to read fully. And for that, I fully apologize. * This troper, while often speaking quickly when excited, usually

avoids this by enunciating clearly. However, in her wrst rabid-fangirl moments (very rare, like... once every few months, tops), she'll go off --> Me: "[[{{Squee}} Eeeheehee]]socuteandangryandwhyisitthatthe[[AudioErotica sexiestvoices]]allbelongtocharactersIcan't[[{{Shipping}} ship]]becausethey're{{Asexual}}or[[OfficialCouple taken]]andohmygod[[TsubasaReservoirChronicle Kurogane's]][[EvilLaugh Evil Laugh]]isthesexiestthingever..." * This troper was told by her teacher that she's a MotorMouth because her brain works faster than everyone else in the class (an advanced lab science class). It sometimes overlaps with SesquipedalianLoquaciousness, and has a tendency to show up in her writing by only adding commas where she thinks is necessary (as in not after every 'too' that means 'also'). * [[MeikyuButterfly This Troper]] is a pretty, PRETTY bad case of this. ''Heavily'' coupled with SesquipedalianLoquaciousness, just to make it even worse. * This troper inherited her grandmother's amazing Motor Mouth ability, but whereas her grandmother is understandable, this troper unfortunately ends up either [[PorkyPigPronunciation stuttering]] or [[TheUnintelligible not understood.]] Attempts at being a [[DeadpanSnarker Deadpan Snarker]] are immediately negated by these. * A few weeks ago I was enthusing to my friend about something, probably video game related. He was just smiling and nodding, until another friend turns to him and asks "can you actually understand anything he's saying?". Answer: "nope". * This troper does this all the time, much to the frustration of her mother and the bafflement of her friends. Once at school, we were doing a teach-the-class unit, and this troper was several minutes into her lesson when the teacher asked her to slow down a little. ''Every student in the class'' breathed an audible sigh of relief, and this now furiously-blushing troper continued at a slightly more reasonable pace. * Tropers/{{Excel-2010}}. I won a "Fastest Talker" award in middle school. [[OverlyNarrowSuperlative I was the only one nominated.]] * [[RhiPanda This Troper]] has done this her entire life and it frustrates her friends and family alike. She almost always gets asked to repeat what she says and often speaks so fast she trips over her own words^_^ * [[{{@/sgrunt}} This troper]] was speaking at a meeting as time was quickly running out. Afterwards, he was formally congratulated for breaking the rate of speech record of the assembly. * This troper often becomes this when he's bored. * Tropers/SunnyV tends to lapse into this around her {{nakama}}. It helps that they do this too. * [[Tropers/PasswordForgettingTroper This Troper]] ''can'' do this, but he has to prepare something in advance or he'll start talking faster than he can think of things to say. * ThisTropes is usually quiet, but when she opens her mouth, shutting her up is hard. * This Troper has to constantly remind himself to speak slowly.

Otherwise he'll talk so fast that he'll be rather unintelligible. Especially when he's excited or when he's talking himself through a complicated instruction or manual. * This troper was like that when he was younger but right now he has fallen into the opposite extreme: he has problems speaking normally because he thinks faster than he can speak, resulting in any attempts at non-slow speech coming out as gibberish. Also, he now gets the Motor Mouth treatment from his ''Calculus teacher'' which is NOT a good thing. * [[{{Tropers/Luna87}} This troper]], perhaps to make up for being such a [[ShrinkingViolet shy, quiet child]] became this in adulthood. At least, so my parents say. Is it any wonder that my favorite LooneyTunes character is Foghorn Leghorn? ** Another example in my life is my [[AnnoyingYoungerSibling youngest brother]]. The kid is always on, I swear. * I really do this. When told to talk slower, I reply with "listen faster." * This troper did not speak much when I was really young while my sister was holding full conversations when she was 1 (I think I said my first sentence when I was 2). Now, whenever the two of us are in conversation, she rarely gets a word in edgeways. However, although I rarely fall into this by accident, I've been able to read things out loud at a pace (and sometimes volume) that has raised eye brows in shock. * Me, when I'm on a Series/DoctorWho high. * [[{{osakachan12}} This tropette]] ''breathes'' this trope. When confronted with this, I reply with "Well, I guess you should listen faster." I also get told I talk like a Spanish or Japanese person. * I have always been a motor mouth though usually it was when I was younger when I always had to be told to slow down coz even though my family could understand me no one else could. But as such it means that now ten years later I have a knack for singing really fast songs like "Modern Major General". {Unfortunately there seems to not be a motor mouthed female role in theatre.} * The speed of this troper's speech increases dramatically when she is distressed, frustrated, or freaking out about something. * This troper actually has a sort-of-dream of performing ''Modern Major General'' at his high school's talent show, mostly to see the look on the audience's faces if I do it successfully. * I have ADHD, so I often talk quickly in order to finish the thought before I get distracted, added to the extreme hyperactivity and a rather high lung capasity means I talk ''really'' quickly. ---Thisisthewaybackto{{Main/MotorMouth}} andbythewaybackImeanthatmaybeyoumightwanttoread theoriginalpagefulloffictionalexamplesrather thanacollectionofreallifeexperiencesby peoplewhospendtoomuchtimehangingaround... oh, the hell with it. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MoustacheDePlume * For my Creative Writing class, we all have pen names so we won't suffer too badly through peer reviews. Mine is AJ Larousse, which, coupled with the fact that my first project is a gay romance and no one around here seems to know what a YaoiFangirl is, should disguise my gender quite handily.

MouthfulOfPi * This troper's brother likes to do this. * This troper unintentionally memorized the first 70 digits of pi by listening to the song "Pi" by Hard 'n Phirm. ** I did it the other way around. I listened to the song a lot in hopes to actually learn some of pi, going so far as to make it my ringtone. It worked. * {{Medinoc}} is not one of those Pi geeks, but still remembers two alexandrines from a [[strike:mnemonic French poem]] French [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piphilology piphilology]] (hey, I learned a new word today!), enough to get 14 decimal places: Count the letters! -->Que j'aime faire apprendre un nombre utile aux sages ! -->Immortel Archimde, artiste ingnieur... ** For [[MikeRosoft me]], it's the sentence ''Sm u sebe v hlav&#283; magickho p &#269;slic deset mm'' (approximately translated into English as: "I by myself in (my) head (of the) magical pi have digits ten", but then it no longer works.) * {{Micah}} had a friend in college who decided that memorizing digits of pi wasn't geeky enough for him, so he memorized [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hexadecimal hexadigits]] of pi instead. * BlackHumor knows that you can fake as much of pi as you want as long as you know more of it than the person you're talking to and you're good at making up random numbers. I'm good at the first but not the second, alas. ** This troper (125 digits, below) has once met someone who really did know more than he did (128 digits, when I had 100). There have also been several would-be fakers. * [[{{JakeLikesCheddar}} This Troper]] never learned Pi beyond 5 places, but will always remember that 100/51 is approximately 1.960784317225. * ''This'' troper never bothered learning any more than the 40 or so digits necessary to calculate the circumference of a circle the size of the entire universe accurate to the width of an atom, and can't even remember beyond 3.1415926535 now. The few "pi=3" biblical literalists who aren't straw men have it easy. Until they actually need to work with circle geometry and trig functions, which might not be often. * [[{{Garfman}} I]] was bored in seventh grade. I've still got 50 digits stuck in my head. * Three words: [[TheWorldEndsWithYou Sho Minamimoto]] cosplayer. ** This troper learned pi as far as 3.14125926535823846264338 just

because of him. ** Don't you mean 3.14159265358979323846264? * This troper can manage as far as 3.141592654, because that's as far as her calculator showed it. * When This troper was in high school calculus, my class was given the entire semester to memorize as many places as possible, for one extra credit point each. I got to twenty-five, but these days ten is about as much as I can rattle off. Maybe twelve on a good day. * This troper got bored enough to memorise it off her calculator once. As the above troper says, it only shows ten digits. I switched to Fibornacci instead, which was useless since you can just work out the numbers in the sequence as necessary, but killed some time. * I had, for the longest time, thought that it went 3.1415927 because I forgot that the calculator would round up the last digit. * This troper has a friend in grade seven who plans to learn 3141 digits of pi by March fourteenth, or 3/14, pi day. She is already over one thousand, recited over about 3 and a half minutes ** But rounded off at three digits past the decimal, it would be 3.14''2''... * This troper went as far as 3.141592653589793238462 with the aid of... music. Really. Consider 1=C, 2=D, 3=E and so on and play the obtained melody (which is not bad, I must say) with any instrument and memorize that. As long as you can hum the music, you'll remember the digits! * This Troper memorized 72 digits. After memorizing most of it, he changed his favorite number to e. He's also memorized other things, such as the first 16 powers of 2. ** Most programmers (this one included) memorize powers of two, simply because they are used so much. * I always found 3.14159265 to be good enough for me. Sometimes, I even use it as a synonym for the edible kind of pie. * This troper has memorized 125 decimal places, most of them during a couple of very boring math classes. 3.1415926535897932384626433 8327950288419716939937510 5820974944592307816406286 2089986280348253421170679 8214808651328230664709384... Next to which, his 15 digits of ''e'' (2.718281828459045) look rather pathetic. ** This troper knows 142 digits of pi, but only 3 digits of e. (Numbers after the above are 46095505822317258) * Does being able to derive one or more formulae to calculate an arbitrary number of digits of pi count as knowing an infinite number of digits? In the case of e, this is even easier, as it has a particularly simple formula. ** It counts if and only if you can evaluate the formula, to arbitrary precision, quickly enough to give the illusion of having the digits memorized. Good luck! * This troper's school liked to have "Sidewalk Chalk day" about once a term. They would leave a few buckets of chalk out and, as long as you weren't obscene about it, you could draw pretty much as you pleased. During her senior year, a student (Civil Engineer, she later found) used his computer's MAPLE to calculate out Pi to the 6642nd digit. He then proceeded to write, in the middle of the quad, * School name* is as easy as 3.1415926535 etc., all over campus, in a continuous line.

This happened in the fall, in the spring he did so with e, going off a balcony, down a wall, and terminating in the middle of the street with chalk marks used to imply he was hit by a car. ** [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome THAT...IS...AWESOME.]] * This troper memorized 200 digits for a contest in her seventh-grade math class. It was something of a CrowningMomentOfAwesome, since her classmates had been making fun of her for constantly reciting it to herself during the period of preparation, only to be utterly thrashed in the actual contest. One student actually yelled "Holy crap!" several digits in. The trick: memorizing it in groups of ten digits. These days I can only remember 35 or so. [[MouthfulOfPi 3. 1415926535 8979323846 2643383279 5028841971...]] * Pi is just a matter of historical accident and odd notation. Real geeks memorize digits of 2* pi (which is actually a more fundamental constant) * Sort of played by [[DaNuke Da_Nuke]] who, on account of having taken digital electronics, knows by heart the first 17 powers of two: 1, 2, 4, 8, 16, 32, 64, 128, 256, 512, 1024, 2048, 4092, 8196, 16372, 32768, 65536. ** {{Medinoc}} does too, and used to assume everybody in the computer science sector knew that. And by the way, it's 409'''6''', 819'''2''' and 163'''84'''. * This troper's friend called to wish her a happy Pi Day (March 14th, aka 3.14). She then went on to say that a former sorority sister of hers had been a math major and had chosen the day as her wedding day. The ceremony was to start at exactly one minute to two in the afternoon. In other words, 3.14 1:59. It's the most deliciously dorky thing this troper has heard in a long time. ** This troper had a friend who did something similar but instead went by military time holding the wedding at exactly 4:32 PM March 14th (3/14 16:32 or with creative adjustment... 3/14 15:92). * Pi=3.1415926535897932384626433832795... And that's as far as [[LeighSabio This Troper]] can get without looking it up. * [[{{LittleMai}} This Tropette]] had to memorize Pi for a task in a big school competition. That task was given at 10 PM, and the time it would be held was given as "when the Organization asks" - a.k.a., anytime. She kept reciting them - around 160 digits - until 4 PM, they called her at 5 PM, she won it, yey! * [[{{Grimalkin}} This Troper]] memorized about 150 digits for a Pi Day contest, and ended up winning third place. The first place winner memorized 314 digits, intentionally to correspond with pi's beginning. These days This Troper only remembers fifty or so digits though. * When [[{{Magus}} This Troper]]'s math teacher needs some random digits for a sample problem, he'll often plug in the first nine or so digits of pi. * [[{{Kinitawowi}} This Troper]] has got as far as 42 digits (3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169...) - it wasn't anything to do with TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy, honest. The calculator in Windows XP can get the first 46 digits right, but then it starts to suffer rounding problems. * Quite honestly, my math team friends and I are geeks. How do we know? We argued over the 100th digit of pi and recited as far as we

knew pi between one another as we waited for the bus to take us to a competition. * This Troper's school celebrates Pi Day, despite being in the UK where the whole 3.14 date thing makes no sense at all. The winner memorised over 300 digits. My friend memorised 100. I inevitably feel slightly inferior whenever I enter a maths classroom. * This troper's middle school had a Pi Day event for seventh and eighth graders. Since sixth graders couldn't participate, her sixthgrade math teacher let the class recite pi as far as they could if they wanted, and this troper blew everyone away with at least 40 more digits than the guy in second place. * This Troper was so bored in secondary school he memorized pi to a hundred places over the course of several lunchtimes. And can still crack 50 even today. * This troper memorized pi = 3.1415926535897932384626433832795 when he was in 4th grade, and has since added six digits (832795). Considering learning some more, too. * Pi = 3.14159265358979323846264. Thank you, KateBush. * [[{{Roxor}} This troper]] has only memorised Pi to nine places and e to seven, but has memorised the first twenty powers of two and the first four negative powers of two in decimal form. Need I say the powers of two come in very useful? 0.0625, 0.125, 0.25, 0.5, 1, 2, 4, 8, 16, 32, 64, 128, 256, 512, 1024, 2048, 4096, 8192, 16384, 32768, 65536, 131072, 262144, 512288, 1048576. ** It's 524288. * This troper is rubbish at remembering pi (generally getting as far as 3.141592), but is quite good at remembering ''e'' because of the pattern in the first 15 decimal digits: 2.7'''1'''8''2''8'''1'''8''2''8'''45'''90'''45'''. Of course, the pattern breaks down after that because e is transcendental, but... ** This troper heard a mnemonic for remembering e back in high school, in case anyone is interested: *** Here are '''2''' facts about AndrewJackson: **** He was the '''7'''th president of the United States. **** He was elected in '''1828'''. **** That's so important, I'll mention it twice: '''1828'''. *** The angles of a right isosceles triangle are '''45'''-'''90''''''45'''. ** Not many math mnemonics help with U.S. history class as well, which increases the usefulness. * This troper had 30-40 digits memorized back in grade school, but can now only recite the first 25 reliably...the decrepitudes of age. * [[{{Quietust}} This troper]] knows pi to 82 decimal places memorized the first 60 (which is how many digits his father knows) in 8th grade, intended to memorize it up to 100, but has never gotten around to finishing it. As for powers of two, he's memorized nearly all of them up to 2^32 (still haven't got 2^28 or 2^29). * This geeky troper subverts this trope in that all of her nongeek friends automatically think she can rattle off Pi digits because she is a Math major when in fact she only knows 3.14 and relies on a calculator for anything beyond that. ** I'm also a maths major that doesn't know any more digits than I

need to. People that deliberately learn off the digits of pi to a large amount of decimal places grate on me a tiny bit just because of how pointless and quasigeeky it is. Of course it's all in good fun and I'm just a bit of a grump. * This troper has a geeky math obsessed cousin with a tattoo of the first hundred or so digits of pi wrapped around his leg in a spiral. Luckily the tattoo artist was just as nerdy as him and made sure to get all the digits right. * [[{{DanaO}} This troper]] never bothered to learn pi past the 31 digits (which somehow ''still'' manages to be unusual - there are a lot of mathematically small ponds) in the mnemonic (probably found in one of Martin Gardner's columns or books): -->Sir, I send a rhyme excelling -->in sacred truth and rigid spelling. -->Numerical sprites elucidate -->for me the lexicon's full weight; -->If nature gain, who can complain, -->Tho' Dr. Johnson fulminate? * This troper memorized 100 (really 96) digits back in 7th grade and used the 3. + 96 digits as a password for email. 25 seconds baby... Still knows those 100 for sure and an additional 100 is iffy. e is easy for the first few... Phi is also neat. In fact, natural constants (pi, e, phi) tend to be nicer to memorize than artificial constants (sqrt(2), sqrt(3)) for some reason... * The digits of pi are arbitrary, depending on the base; continued fraction expansions are much more mathematically interesting. [[{{Robert}} This troper]] will always remember 355/113, which is accurate to 8 decimal places - which comes from pi = 3+1/(7+1/(15+1/(1+1/(292+1/(1+.... . Stopping early gives 22/7, or 333/106. * [[SpectrumFizz This Troper]] knows the value of pi, off by heart, to a relatively modest ten decimal places (3.1415926535). Justified in that this troper is only fifteen years old. However, it's certainly handy to know when you're lacking a scientific calculator and have to settle with a four-function for maths lessons. * This troper has memorized the 300 first decimals through the last week, and plans to memorize at least a few hundred more. His friends say he'll never, EVER need this knowledge, but who knows... * This troper seems to have memorised the most here: 520 digits and counting. * 5419351/1725033, anyone? * 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510... ad infinitum. * This troper memorized Pi to 272 digits, sung to Mozart's Eine Kleine Nachtmusik. She blew away most of the competition at that year's Pi Day contests, where there's an award for most digits and most creative recitation. Won the most creative recitation, came in second to most digits. ** As a Mozart fan and the one at [[strike:767]] 1000 decimals below, this troper thinks this deserves the top spot in the GeekyTurnOn article. * This troper memorized around 116 digits-- some multiple of four,

anyway-- and still knows most of them. Somewhat justified in that her entire geometry class seemed to be doing it, she just got the furthest. * This troper, several years ago, knew 400. I now remember only exactly half of that. * This troper has just memorized the decimals up to the Feynman Point, or the 767 first decimals. Which is still not enough for him, as he's going for 1000. ** 1000 decimal places were reached yesterday, at last. This troper has gotten enough for now. * This troper read that LewisCarroll had used a mnemonic system of his own invention to memorise 71 decimal places of ''pi'', and so decided to one-up him by memorising the first 72 without any mnemonic aids -and I still know them all. * This troper learned the first 30 digits by a song, and then just got another three somewhere else. 3.14159265358979323846264338327950... * [[Tropers/{{Enunciability}} This troper]]'s 8th grade math class had a big poster with pi on it. She stared at it whenever she was bored, and by the end of the year, she knew pi up to the 60th digit. Sadly, she's forgotten most of it by now. * Oddly enough, this troper, who is a mathematician, only knows pi to 11 decimal places. * A room in this troper's old high school had (has?) as many digits of pi above its chalkboards that will fit there in a rather large font. Sadly, this troper only remembered pi as 3.14159 until he read this page and, promptly, got "tongue-tied" when he tried to type that out, originally typing "3.1519" and, then, manage to type it as "3.14i59" and leave it for a few days. * [[@/{{billybobfred}} 3.14159265358979...]] not sure why I memorized that far and no more, but it's more than I'll ever need. * The StarWarsCustomizableCardGame has a card called, "Brainiac" with a destiny value of pi. On the card, pi is listed to 27 digits. [[Tropers/MrBadAxe This troper]] memorized the digits from the card, and then added a few more to get to a round 40 digits: 3.141592653589793238462643383 27950 28841 971... * This troper know Pi to 24 or so decimal places, his best friend knows it to 60 and an English teacher of his supposedly knew it to 125. * This troper is a real mathematician and so knows that trying to learn the expansion of an irrational number in an arbitrary base (why not do it in binary; at least that's slightly fundamental) is a pointless exercise. Rather, he knows that true knowledge of pi means knowing various ways of generating the number to any degree of accuracy required a priori, and knowing the precise logical foundation of these methods. 4 times the sum from 0 to infinity of (-1)^n/(2n+1), anybody? :) He also wonders why if people are so concerned about being accurate to all practical scales involving circles, they don't ever seem to know the expansions of various just-as-common numbers such as e, ln2, sqrt2, or sqrt3, beyond a few digits. ** A Real Mathematician is someone who, when he sees the hallway on fire and a fire hose nearby, exclaims "Aha, a solution exists!" and then goes back to bed.

* [[{{Tropers/Tracer}} This troper]] memorized pi to 200 digits back in high school -- which was in the early 1980s. (His main source for the digits? A photo of a chalkboard in the 1976 ''Guinness Book of World Records'', which listed the world record for most memorized digits of pi at a paltry 3,125.) Those digits are still in his head, ready to be recited at a moment's notice. * I've only gotten up to 100 - as in, exactly 100. I group them in my head as follows: 3.14159265 3589 793238 46264 33 8 32795 0288 41971 69399 37510 58209 74944 59230 78164 0628 6 20899 86280348 25342117 0679. * 3.14159265358979323846264338327 is what [[@/{{Gumbal1}} I]] memorized. * When this troper was bored at work back in 1996 he memorized pi in a poem form that he saw on a web page. To this day he can recite: 3.14159; 2653589; 7932384; 626 and a whole lot more. * 3.14. That's all you need for any calculation you're doing in your head. You need to be more precise, you go look it up. Heck, for rough estimates I go with just 3. ---Had enough Pi? Go back to the main MouthfulOfPi page. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MovingTheGoalposts * I know a university professor who has a habit of coming up with more work for students to a point where many would try to find alternate routes for completing the courses. Extreme case of this was his insistence on grad student's doctoral thesis. For some reason, it always needed just one more publication - with the professor as a coauthor, of course - before completing the overall work. This didn't end until the student left for another university, at which point the threat of losing the thesis to another university was so strong that the professor facilitated a quick completion. * This troper had it happen with his parents. He got yelled for basically not being a perfect child, and then once that was accomplished, yelled at for not being perfect enough. ** Apparently, you're ChristopherTitus. ** I know exactly how you feel. * This troper's dad used to do this. He stopped when I bluntly told him "If you keep moving the goalposts, I'm not playing your game anymore" * As a student, this used to really stick in this troper's teeth - you said to do this, I did it, why are you suddenly changing the rules? Then she became a teacher and realised that sometimes a student manages to complete a task's ExactWords while clearly not understanding the purpose of the exercise and thus learning what they were supposed to. The goalposts have to be shifted so the ''actual'' goal is met. (Less charitably, sometimes it's just that something that was supposed to take half an hour was completed in five minutes and now the teacher is scrambling to fill the remaining class time.)

* When I was ten, I went to Switzerland for a family reunion and, while in Zurich, my father brought me to a knife store. I have always had an obsession with knives, even when I was a kid, and when I saw the Victorinox Swiss Army Hunter (a knife with a ~4 3/4 inch blade), I begged to get it. Instead, I was promised it for my 13th birthday. Three years later, no knife. After three years of begging, I was promised one immediately, and never got it, promised one if I became emotionally stable (my parents are moving the goalposts on that one as well), and, most recently, one if I got through 9th grade of the therapeutic school I am now in. When at the end of the school year, my parents told me that since I entered half-way through, I'd get one at the end of summer school, after that, when I got through 10th grade, then that summer school. I am turning 18 this year and have just finished 11th grade, still no knife and now no goalposts. ---Did I say you could get back to the main page by [[MovingTheGoalposts clicking here]]? Well, what I ''meant'' was clicking there ''and'' giving me $20.

MrImagination * [[Tropers/{{Mort08}} My]] greatest imaginary creation started out so simple; one day, at age five or six, I was just minding my own business when I randomly thought up a crossover of two TV shows I watched frequently: I think it was Little Bear and Cyberchase. Anyway, I found it so fun to think about that I began to imagine these same characters together over and over and ''over'' again, creating new adventures for them on a daily basis. And that's the end, right? Wrong. Instead of setting aside these fantasies, I ran with them. And by "ran with them," I mean I created a ''massive'' fanfiction-like crossover of all the characters I've come to adore over the years, set in a large and intricate fantasy world complete with a dark backstory, ancient prophecies and a '''lot''' of magic. And it keeps growing, too: whenever I develop an interest in some new character, I work them (and usually their sidekicks and entire world) into my story. After a while I created a group of four rather one-dimensional OCs to connect all these characters (and partially just 'cuz I was getting bored.) Well, that number of OCs rose to ten, gained distinct personalities and eventually went BrotherChuck on ''all the characters I had originally started with,'' becoming the main characters themselves. That was when I realized: I'd gone and made something truly special to me. Ten years later, I'm an eccentric loner with a screwed-up family life and small circle of friends. Every single day, I relieve some of my pressure by entering this little fantasy world of adventure and weirdness where anything can and will happen. Seriously, my characters are best friends with {{The Penguins Of Madagascar}}, have [[Film/AliceInWonderland helped Alice fight the Jabberwocky]] and have IndianaJones as a history teacher. * My whole entire life revolves around this trope. I used to have loads and loads of stories, Id have a different one of these every ten minutes. Litterally. That was until 2004. I was seven, and it was

winter. What started of as some random person saving truckloads of prisoners (litterally trucks. With cages.) from an evil kingdom. It evolved to me becoming a warrior princess, with a little sister, a palace etc.. But I wasnt a little pretty princess with a crown and stuff. I fought swordfights, and probably finished off more enemys than my entire worlds army. And I probably did more ruling than my parents. Now I am fourteen. And It has come so far that I have written stuff about the anatonomy of dragons in that world[[OurDragonsAreDifferent My Dragons are different.]] Even if only ever so slightly}} and how magic works.And learnt that people freak out when you jump around pretending to have a sword fight at school. I often ended up with Calvin-like situations. If I have a moment to spare- I would immediatly go off into "Magicas" as I called the world.

MrsHypothetical *Averted, and inverted, in this troper's boyfriend's homeroom class. Well, not boyfriend, really, but squeeze. Anyway, they both ditched homeroom; when the guy's homeroom teacher caught them making out in the hall, he yelled, "No one needs to see that!" and dragged said squeeze inside. The troper followed (even though it wasn't her homeroom), embarrassing the squeeze. The teacher asked this troper what her name was, then proceeded to write the squeeze's surname after it. "Alice Bobovitch!" he announced (not really). This troper protested that she plans on keeping her name.

MrsRobinson * OK. This troper is in the middle of being Mrs Robinson'd by a woman who is quite aware she's fulfilling the trope - while I started the flirtations, she pushed it much further very quickly and I can safely say I was seduced. And the age thing? At 43, she's double my age. ** [[FetishFuel Lucky you]]! ** Lucky bastard. ** Ditto'd. * This troper has experienced the darker side of this trope. I was come on to, [[{{Squick}} under no uncertain terms]], by a Mrs. Robinson on the night of my father's funeral - while my father's brother (whom she was dating) slept peacefully in the next room. * This troper was at a bar - not a particularly classy joint - with her boyfriend and some friends. She got up to go to the bathroom and came back to find a middle-aged woman flirting with her (21-year-old) boyfriend. When the troper said, "Excuse me, you're sitting in my seat," the woman replied, "Sweetie, you don't own him," and ''patted the boyfriend's knee''. He quickly stood up and said, "Yes, she does, actually, and we were just leaving." ** That's not only [[KickTheDog depraved]], but almost pointlessly so. [[FridgeLogic Couldn't she have just seduced a guy who wasn't taken instead?]] * This gay troper has a thing for effeminate older men, especially if they "try to seduce him." A fairly hefty proportion of his lovers have been at least twenty years older than he.

Mugen This page was created so all tropers who also happen to be MUGEN enthusiasts can catalogue anything they wish to share about their experiences with MUGEN. Bad characters? Crazy matches? Anything at all MUGEN related goes here. * This Troper was trying to make a compalation of several characters being victim to the HaruhiSuzumiya rape move, until one character managed to counter it. That character, [[NeonGenesisEvangelion EVA Unit-01]]. This was the only time Shinji has ever not been [[IncrediblyLamePun fucked over by God.]] * This Troper once played a character that was just a single pixel. As long as you kept you eye on it, it was actually a very good fighter. It actually had attacks and combos (not that you could see them, other than in the enemy's damage bar). You just use the arrow keys to maneuver it over to the enemy (it had 100% freedom of movement in all directions) , and attack. It was also next to impossible to hit because it's hit detection was literally limited to a single pixel. LethalJokeCharacter indeed. It's name? "." * KurisuMurei had this battle play out: [[{{Kanon}} Nayuki Minase]] [[ExtremityExtremist (Awake)]] (played by Kurisu) vs. {{Naruto}} (AIcontrolled), best of five rounds. Nayuki was relatively true to her source material and had average stats, while Naruto was mostly custom and had a whole lot of FakeDifficulty, (with the most annoying being a combination Taunt/Counter move that he spams and a DesperationAttack that violates the ConservationOfNinjutsu if he's close to losing the match) but worse characters have been made. After several tries, he managed to figure out the counter and counter that, and is in a Round 5 situation. Nayuki seemed to be on her way to making that final round a CurbStompBattle, but that just triggered the [[DesperationAttack Tajuu]] [[MesACrowd Kage Bunshin No Jutsu]], and that leads to opponents being mobbed by a large number of Shadow Clones, most of the time not surviving long enough to escape the initial juggle. This was one of the exceptions to that, since Nayuki still had most of her lifebar before the attack. Once the first wave had passed, there was probably enough time for one attack at most. The chosen attack: a HurricaneKick that dispersed the crowd and managed to reach the real Naruto for the knockout blow.

MuggingTheMonster * This troper's sensei (in Aikido) told us this story about a football player who was participating. I don't really remember whether or not he was a full time member, but at one point he's watching that dojo's sensei (a little old man) do a fairly basic technique. He says [[TemptingFate "I can do that,"]] or "That looks easy", and ambles up to the teacher. The teacher has him execute the wrist grab....and promptly drops him like a bad habit. The man springs up, predictably whining "I wasn't ready!". The teacher lets him try again. He grabs the older man's wrist; the sensei asks if he's ready. The second the

man says 'yes', the sensei drops him even faster. The man stands up, bows, and says, "Thank you sensei; now I understand". ** And before I forgot - O-sensei, who created Aikido, was 5'3" and practiced until he was over 80 years old. ** I also heard from someone in my dojo about how he once was walking down Sixth Street (in Austin, known for having a LOT of bars) and some drunk comes out and accosts him. He promptly flips the idiot over. The man struggles to his feet and says that he thought sempai was someone else, then goes to hide in the bar. ** And a girl at the same dojo mentioned how she's used aikido on the street at least twice. She's college-age, so she probably has some street trouble. ** Not at the dojo, but this troper's dad used to empty the arcade machines at some grocery store (this was like in the 70s or 80s). He carried a small handgun with him. Some teenager came up one night and brandishes a knife, demanding dad give him the bags of quarters. My dad pulls out the gun, and when the kid doesn't run, carefully fires a shot right by his head. The kid's left with light burns or grazes and ringing ears, and is quickly arrested. * This troper's friends were once mugged while on their way home from their historical reconstruction club. When they pulled swords from under their cloaks, the muggers found their knives rather inadequate... ** Reminds me of that SCA filk song about Lady Trude: "I'll see your six and raise you thirty-five!" indeed. *** [[http://www-users.cs.york.ac.uk/susan/sf/filk/seeyrsix.htm Here's the lyrics.]] The song is called, of course, "I'll see your six." * More like breaking into the monster's house. This Troper's [[CreepyChild brother]] had a glass roof in his room, so when he lay down in bed one night, he looked up and saw a CreepyClown (his phobia) looking back down at him. Que Troper's brother taking a '''shotgun''' and shooting through the ceiling. He missed, but the glass ceiling shattered and the "clown burglar" fell into the bedroom and to the floor, incapacitated. Troper's brother was fine too, but got cut on the glass and wound up suing the trespasser. ** May be FridgeBrilliance on the clown's behalf- I mean, if you see a crazed clown in your house, you're less likely to confront him than you are to run screaming to your room, giving him time to escape. He just climbed on the wrong guy's roof. * This Troper once wrote a story. One part of in involved a mugger coming across a young woman in an alley. Said woman's clothes were torn and she was visibly wounded making her appear to be an easy conquest. Said woman was also a vampire looking for something to vent her anger on... * This Troper's buddy, a former policeman, was held up by some robbers while being in plain clothes on the way to a brothel crackdown. Somehow, the robbers were a little disconcerted by the ten other policemen nearby drawing weapons... * In a similar line to some of the examples above, this troper's father always liked to tell him about a pair of rather unfortunate bank robbers. Back in the bad old days without chequing accounts, electronic transfer or [=ATMs=], some army companies used to drive out

to local banks to receive their pay if it were convenient to do so. A pair of bank robbers, ignorant of this fact, tried to rob the bank on payday and found themselves staring down the barrels of an entire army platoon. ** This troper can top that. His mother used to work in D.C. and told him the story of two guys who tried to rob a bank (why is it always two guys?). When he threatened the clerk she laughed right in his face. As the guys turn around everyone in the building has a weapon drawn. EVERYONE! Turns out they tried to rob the bank next to FBI headquarters on payday. * [[@/{{Nomic}} This troper]] has used this one a few times. Probably the best example is in one of his comics (or script of, as I haven't gotten to actually drawing the panels) a pair of GenreSavvy muggers let the protagonist go because he is wearing a trenchcoat and they assume he must be some kind of [[BadassLongcoat superhuman badass]]. They then realise that he wasn't (he merely bought the coat from a bargain bin because it looked cool) and resolve to rob the next guy they come across. Unfortunately, the next guy turns out to be the series' BigBad, a dark god in human form. Needless to say, pain ensues. * This troper has a story that will remind everyone that when you're in Texas, assume everyone has a gun. My aunt, in her mid-fifties, was sitting in the parking lot of a mall one evening while waiting for her daughter to return some item. An idiot teenager sauntered by and snapped the antenna off the car. He grinned at her like "What are you going to do about it?" She calmly reached into the console compartment, drew out her handgun, and aimed at him through the window. With a look of abject terror, he carefully laid the antenna back on the hood of the car and turned tail to run. ** Another story involved my friend's grandfather. There was a gang of teenagers breaking into cars in his neighborhood at night, taking stereos and any other valuables they could find. This gentleman decided to lay out a trap for the little punks, and left some power tools in the bed of his pickup truck and waited for them to show up. Keeping him company in this vigil was the sniper rifle he'd carried with him during his 30 years as a sharpshooter for the Marine Corps. This was when the extremely baggy pants were fashionable amongst the hip gangster wannabes. When the kids started unloading his truck, he called out a warning. They laughed at seeing it was just a little old man. He shot holes through the crotch of each of their jeans. *** That reminds this troper about a local old man who got tired of people breaking into his car, so he made a little trap out of mainly old rusty fishhooks and hid it on the driver seat under a blanket. The police were less amused, when it took them over two hours to cut loose the perp who eventually showed up and stayed the night (so to say). ** I lived in an apartment, in a rough neighborhood in Oakland, next door to the nicest lady you'd ever meet. Despite her poor health (overweight, asthma, etc.), she volunteered on a dozen do-gooding committees at her church. She had the standard John, Bobby and Martin painting on her mantle. California, and particularly the San Francisco Bay Area, is the opposite of Texas - very gun-unfriendly. So imagine my surprise when, during one of our chats, she told me this story: She

was at the hospital, got on the elevator, when a tough-guy got on the elevator after her and approached her in a menacing manner. So she pulled the handle of her pistol up from her purse, and he promptly evacuated the elevator. Turns out, in addition to collecting the rent for the landlord, her other job was at a check-cashing place, so she had one of those very rare carry permits. Thank goodness. * When [[@/DeVos I]] was drinking with two friends and a drunk decided he wanted to start a fight and poured his pint, very slowly whilst maintaining eye contact, over my flatmate, who is a Maui Thi purple belt. Having got put in a hold, kneed in the groin and forced to mop up said pint with his hair, he felt angry and later got his friends together and sought me and my flatmate out outside the bar when we were with the other friends were were drinking with; a part time bouncer and a guy on the Welsh under-25 judo team. They then started on us ''whilst we were standing next to a police riot van.'' I wish I could make this up. * This troper is fairly sure the majority of American teens are complete morons. One of these idiots tried to get me to hand over my wallet, when he was unarmed and I had a fucking SLEDGE HAMMER with me. Poor kid's femur got broke. * This troper's father got mugged while walking his pet late at night in downtown D.C. Her father was a police officer at the time. Guy attempted to rob her dad in an alley. Her dad's 'pet' rose up on its hind legs and smacked the mugger upside the bead. Mugger freaked and ran all the way to the police station to report a guy with a gorilla. What did Mr. Mugger tell the cops? He tried to rob the guy with the so-called gorilla. Guess what it was? My dad was walking a year old black bear cub on a leash since he quite obviously couldn't walk it during the day. Police promptly locked stupid up. My dad? went on his merry way with Bubba the bear. ** Who the hell is stupid enough to try to mug someone with a freaking bear on a leash?!? ** The kind of idiot who ''admits'' to the police that he was trying to rob someone, that's who. * [[@/MisterAlways This troper]] was once mugged after coming home from a friend's house. The attacker had a balisong (or butterfly knife, for those of you whose cultural interest doesn't grow beyond Team Fortress 2) that I now estimate to have been about two inches long. This troper's cousin was an avid knife collector at the time, and this troper had bought a special knife from his friend to give to his cousin for his birthday. That knife? Was a 7-inch long kukri-madejackknife. I've never seen anyone run so fast. ** ''Please'' tell me you quoted Crocodile Dundee during this incident. * This (Jamaican) Troper's father was hanging out in a parking lot after midnight, waiting to be picked up (this was about 20 years ago, FYI). This guy was hanging around, showing off a one of those Swiss Army Knife blades in an "I'm gonna cut your ass" kind of way. So my father pulls out a 7-inch long switch-blade and starts picking his nails with it. The mugger (or whatever) practically teleported out of that parking lot. * This Troper was once on a date with his girlfriend when a mugger

held us up at gunpoint. I got out my wallet, and while the gun was trained on me, my girlfriend (a skilled martial artist) beat the stuffing out of him. I've never had my masculinity so thoroughly crushed, nor seen a human neck so awkwardly bent... ** Why be ashamed? It went [[XanatosGambit just as planned...]] *** Hot rescue/accident prevention sex was had, I'm sure. * This troper worked on a film set where one of her coworkers was a sweet, pretty nineteen-year-old female production assistant. One day her duties included watching the grip truck. Lo and behold, a couple of guys appeared and started giving her a hard time - until the grips got back from what they had been doing. Which must have been moving the dolly, because they were all carrying their shillelaghs. The guys took one look at the advancing group of burly men carrying metal sticks and ran like their asses were on fire. * An interesting aversion told by an Aikido instructor. The Aikido instructor's friend and fellow black belt left the dojo one night, and then returned several minutes later saying he had been mugged. When asked what happened, he said that the mugger grabbed him from behind and put a knife to his throat, demanding his wallet. When asked why he didn't use his aikido, which had moves for such a situation, the man said that he was almost completely sure he could have pulled off the move and submitted the mugger without getting his throat slit, but the spare amount of cash in his wallet was not worth the risk. The moral of course is that even monsters are not infallible, and that the best way to survive a fight is to avoid fighting. ** Alternatively, to give them your wallet and then beat the stuffing out of them when they're no longer holding you at knife point. *** Chasing a knife-wielding thug down an alley would be an even more pointless risk than fighting back while you're in the process of being mugged. ** This Troper has heard a similar story, about an instructor who was punched around by your common chav, who explained he simply didn't want to use his [[DangerousForbiddenTechnique lethal techniques]] on a mere thug. He was, however, clearly described as "master" of what is called ''bullshido''. * A variation happened to this troper on Halloween (this probably belongs somewhere else, but I don't know where to put it so here it goes). A guy in a Jason costume held up his machete as a challenge to me. This troper (who went as ThePunisher) held up his [[ShotgunsAreJustBetter boomstick]] and pulled back his [[BadassLongcoat trenchcoat]] to reveal the [[GunsAkimbo twin pistols]] and knife he had there. The guy in the Jason costume simply said "You win" and left, before I even told him about the [[CrazyPrepared extra knife in my boot.]] ** It didn't get violent, but when a woman moved into my uncle's tight-knit Kentucky town, her loser ex followed her a few days later, screaming insults and threats at her from the street. When the police arrested him, he realized that the entire time, there were more than thirty high-caliber rifles trained on him by the neighbors. * A douchebag/chav sees a young, pretty girl wearing a backpack walking somewhere alone, in a dark area, in a bad part of town. He heads toward her, as she passes a furniture store, with his knife

drawn. This should be fun, right? Turns out, she's a dude, a second degree black-belt, and he just pressed his Berserk Button. Chav goes through the plate glass window with a broken nose and orbital bone (eye socket). Police arrive to find the black belt pounding the face of the chav in, after he dragged the would-be mugger's body over large shards of broken glass left in the windowpane. * [[MutantRancor I heard]] a story from my former history teacher (I graduated, if you were wondering) about a historical reenactment... actor... whatever friend of his. Said friend was heading home from an event and stopped off somewhere (I don't know why; probably dinner or something). On his way back to the car, a mugger approached him with a knife and [[IdiotBall ordered him to open the trunk.]] In which was a fully functional claymore. The mugger was arrested shortly thereafter, having fled and been caught. * I recall two of these situations: A girl being molested by like 4 guys... a few seconds later, those 4 guys were twitching on the ground. Second happened to my father who was followed by three gangsta-youths that were pissed at him for telling the tram driver that they had damaged the seats... They draw their butterfly knives... And my father his 80 cm Tai Chi blade from under his coat. They were never heard of again. * This troper has a couple of good stories: -->1. A friend worked in tech support, who was about 6'8", close to 300 pounds. Big guy. He played pick up basketball as well, and even played against very good college players, where he could simply just lean on them and wear them out through sheer weight. He's taking the subway home from work, and had a pretty bad day, and was grumpy, and this 5 foot 4 guy tried to rob him with a pocket knife. Needless to say, the big guy had a target to vent his frustrations on. He said he literally picked the guy up, turned him around, and slammed him face first against the wall. Eventually, when the cops came, they tried to arrest the big guy, and their reaction when finding out that it was the little guy who was the criminal, they could only say "What the fuck is wrong with you?" -->2. Friend's family owns a grocery store, but it's also a deli and butcher like place. Punk comes in, pulls out a pocket knife, and demands money. The owner's only reaction was to whip out 2 much bigger butcher blades, and say "Mine are bigger". Kid did the right thing and ran. * My friend is an unassuming-looking D&D nerd who happened at the time to be working in a slightly dodgy neighborhood. One evening, he was waiting for the bus home while reading a novel and drinking his Sobe, when some wanker starts tugging at friend's backpack. Wanker gets the stupid beaten out of him with the bottle of Sobe (which was replaced by friend's fists when the bottle shattered). Police show up. Wanker tries to press charges against friend for assault. Friend explains the situation. Cops laugh themselves sick. * This troper is tiny and pale, dresses rather unusually, and is often seen alone in corners with video games or sketchpads. Of course, this is akin to wearing a flashing "BULLY ME!" sign, where she lives. People who come and insult her think they're getting a [[RealWomenNeverWearDresses prissy]], [[LonersAreFreaks lonely]]

ShrinkingViolet with no self-esteem, but are often quite scared when they get a rage-prone {{Yangire}} who can dish HighOctaneNightmareFuel in several languages, [[SlasherSmile with a smile]]. They didn't dare start anything physical, but oh, how she wishes that they had~ Someday... someday, she will get her chance to beat the stuffing out of someone~ Aaah~ * This troper uses this trope as a way to prevent muggings. Wearing a leather trenchcoat, metal chains, heavy workboots, and sporting long hair and a determined stride, he hardly ever gets accosted by muggers or chavs. ** However, wearing a karate gi inverts this, causing people to think it's somehow acceptable to mock this troper and anyone else wearing one nearby. This troper is entirely confused by this, but generally doesn't have enough motivation to chase them down and demonstrate why, or do anything other than invite them to repeat their statement within reach. * A friend of mine was once visited by a night time robber. The robber wound up thoroughly beaten and arrested. Moral of the story? If you're going to rob a house at night, try not to pick one where the resident burly teenager has insomnia. * My cousin, who is about four years my junior, once had a run-in with a purse-snatcher. She chased him a few blocks and then caught up with him and put him in a head-lock. She was pregnant at the time. What the purse-snatcher didn't know was, she had also served in the military. ** Your cousin is hardcore. And probably hot. But mostly hardcore. *** Oh she is - I wish I had her crazyawesome looks. Anyway, while she was holding that guy down, she demanded, "WHAT do YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" and he replied, as he shat bricks, "I-I didn't know you would do that!" And I wish I were as hardcore as she is - she takes after her mum who has about a BAZILLION [[BerserkButton buttons you do not wanna press]]. * Two summers ago their was this pair of robbers who broke into my neighbors house at night. When the pair reached the bedroom where the homeowners were sleeping they were detected by the family dog. The robbers then attempted to make a run for it. The slower of the two was tackled to the ground before he even left the front yard. The home owner's comment? "This is why you don't rob a runner." The other guy was caught the next day, but was nice enough to have left at least some of his loot in the chief detective's backyard. * One New Years this Troper formally of the USMC had two cousins in town,one Canadian Special Forces the other UK Security. Looking for something to do we decided to visit the Castro district. Realizing that they had their Parade Dress Kilt Uniforms, i dug out my SCA court dress kilt and trews. On the way back to the hotel meet six drunk and stoned "Dudes" looking to "jack some queens": one was dressed as baseball player with a bat, another had brass knuckles the last two small knives. We had three swords, more than a dozen daggers, a mace, an officers baton and a pistol (plus a an empty covered holster on the cousin).The fight lasted less 30 seconds. After the bat broke they ran several blocks almost passing a couple of SFPD who wanted to know what was up with the handle. An another Cop stopped us 10 minutes later, laughed when we told him our side,checked [=IDs=] and permits. Finally

taking some pictures of us(said the DA would not believe about the feathered hats and bearskin),he thanked my cousin for not drawing his gun. * A variant happened with a former kung fu teacher of mine. He had been working a security job in a bad neighborhood and wound up injuring a belligerent fellow who was on amphetamines. Later, the guy came after him with a shotgun. He went back to the police station and my old sifu got a nifty story. To underscore the situation, [[CrazyAwesome ol' Sifu K likes to hunt sharks, walk around carrying mason jars filled with sand and buy lots of illegal fireworks in Chinatown.]] ** To clarify, the gun was never actually pulled on Sifu K. The guy had it in the trunk of his car and Sifu K recognized him and got the drop on him when he went to get it. Still a pretty cool story. * I was reading my local paper one day when the picture attached to one particular article caught my eye. It was a picture of a fellow from my high school days who used to bully me and my friends. Turns out after high school he went from beating kids up for their lunch money to mugging people for their wallets and purses. After a couple times in and out of jail, he finally picked the wrong person to fuck with: namely a guy with a concealed carry permit and a Smith & Wesson. He met his end with a bullet between the eyes. I have to admit I smiled as I read that article. Lights out loser. * This troper has a friend who is the sweetest girl you could meet; petite, blonde dreadlocks, tree loving, always smiling and friendly, and always polite. One day, we were on the bus home from school, and the only seat left was beside one of the loser bullies from two grades above her, but being the lovely girl she is, she asked politely if she could have the seat. The bully then swore at her, called her names, and shoved her away, which she told him wasn't very nice, and so he spat on her, and she went crazy, throwing punches and screaming at him. a minute later, he was in tears, running off the bus two stops before his, and she was sitting in the empty seat in shock. Que the even older bullies patting her on the shoulder and telling her not to worry about getting in trouble - he was always a jerk to girls and deserved it. * This Troper's CrazyPrepared cousin once lived in the worst suburb of our capital. Then one day she got assaulted by a would-be-rapist who, with his knife drawn, ordered her to walk to the alley few feet way. Yeah, she obiendly walked when the knife was pressed to her back, but once the creep spinned her around, he found the blade of 10 inches tall wakizashi (like a shortened katana) on his throath. [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome "I'll give you three seconds to run"]]. She never heard of him again. * This troper's friend is known as the snarky, somewhat reasonable one of the group. This changed when He and his girlfriend, whom he is protective of to the point of bodyguard crush, were accosted by some thugs with knives. Said friend is around 6' and about 18 stone but looks lighter. First one got disarmed and ran, second one got flung backwards but the third managed to land a superficial cut on his girlfriend (herself a talented martial artist). The ensuing brutality ended with the third mugger having a knee shattered and having

longterm lung trouble because my friend drove a size 13 boot heel into his sternum with around the equivalent to 756 pounds of force behind it. It should also be noted that said friend is a self taught submissions specialist and not a very good impact fighter due to his poor spacial awareness. * I am a self admitted compact, laid back geek. I do not appear to be much of an threat, and between glasses and CCG collection basically had "bother me" written in big neon letters on my bag. One day, a classmate quite a size larger than me (and a basketball player to boot, so he had height, weight, and reach) stole one of my cards when I was playing a round with a friend during lunch. He taunted me with it, and when I pointed out he had no idea where it would have come from in the first place short of my deck (I played a much rarer CCG than Magic or Pokemon), he still wouldn't return it. In fact, he hept taunting me with it anyway. Unfortunately for him, I have a BerserkButton about theft due to traumatic events as a small child and parents with some sort of martial background (martial arts for my mother, armed forces for my father) who'd passed on a few things. He was summarily put in a headlock, bent double due to our size differences, and his neck was mildly hyperextended up and back. I would have started with the patella-to-mandible/maxilla introductions, but my even larger and now extremely concerned friend got me to let go. The bully relented (though not without damaging my property in the process) and hobbled off. We both should have been reported for it (theft and fighting, respectively), but I don't think he wanted to let it be known that a known geek had trounced him in a fight. Good thing we hadn't gotten into that scrape nearer to the bench where I'd been sitting. My large, heavy plastic lunch cooler was sitting on that, and [[ImprovisedWeapon dad had instructed me on how to improvise]] [[CombatPragmatist should the issue arise.]] That card still bears the scars of that incident to this day. * While playing Zoo Tycoon 2, this troper put a tiger and a rhino in the same exhibit only to discover later that the rhino had killed the tiger! * This troper is a rather large guy, tall, wide-shouldered, and though he is a complete wimp, he's used to people crossing the street when they meet me late at night... Until he takes a shortcut through a park, and a guy with a knife emerges to demand his wallet... And this troper just freezes up. I mean, I have never been in a situation like this one before. So we stand there, me just staring at him, he threatening me and waving a knife while looking more and more ridiculous, as I notice that he sounds no older than twelve... Then, I take a step forward. I don't know why, and he turns and runs like a little shit, as a nearby bush explodes with insults and laughter as three bigger guys emerge from the shadows. Me, not understanding what the hell is going on, run like hell. I'm still rather confused.:/ ** They were probably either drunk/high, on a dare, or...I dunno. Teenagers are stupid >_> <_< * This troper's friend J used to play rugby in school with this one kid, K. One evening, walking back from training, they were accosted (at a distance) by a group of three chavs. They ignored them until one of the insults got racist, towards K. At 15, K was 6'4", half Maori

(the race the phrase 'brick shithouse' was invented for), and, well, played rugby. Walking up to one of them, K grabs this kid by the collar, and knocks him clean out with a single punch. The only reason the kid wasn't on the floor was because K was holding his collar. Needless to say, the rest of the kids didn't hang around long * There was a story at This troper's old Aikido Dojo of when an armed robber attempted to steal from my sensei's house. When she stood up to him, he lunged at her. She disarmed him and broke his wrist with one hand, and kept him pinned to the ground until the police could arrive to arrest the would-be robber. * Subverted and played straight with this troper; a couple of thugs attempted to rob him and an ex-roommate of his. The subversion: the roommate was a Vietnam war vet, but complied to the robbers' demands. The straight play: this troper struck back long enough to force them to leave enough blood evidence behind to get them charged for the crime. * I have two stories that could fit here, first I was walking down the street in daylight when some wannabe gangsta type starts yelling homophobic slurs at me, I ignore him and walk past, when I do I hear him running behind me yelling "hey **** don't you ****ing ignore me!" at this I spin on my heels and without a word just look him right in the eye, I must have had a BattleAura going on because he stops in his tracks, runs across the street yells out one last obscenity and runs off, the other story was during finals one semester in college, I had some late night classes and the bus home had a transfer that left me in a bad part of town at 1 in the morning, I was tired and stressed out from the workload, I also was lugging one of those backpacks with the little roller wheels loaded with about 40 lbs worth of books, notebooks and other classroom miscellanea, anyway some drunk staggers up to me and begins harrassing me, I tell him to go away, I'm not in the mood, he ignores me and starts to get physical, at this I swing the backpack like an olympic throwing hammer at the side of his head, he bounces off the side of the building, by the time he gets up the bus has arrived and I got out of there. afterwords a friend offers to give me a ride home as long as I have the late classes even though she lives on the other side of town * This troper is commonly misundertood as an easy victim due to her light boned, nerdy appearance, and as easily scared due to a tremor misunderstood as shivering, she has realized at daylight it often helps much to (unexpected) face the attacker directly and look them in the eyes. Sometimes randomly sliding into a foreign language gives her a kind of Badass Foreigner aura. One time though, in a rather bad part of town, a drunk guy tried to attack her at broad daylight, quite frankly he ran right into it meeting her (then beginners) taekwondo skills, a wooden stick and a handfull of pebbles, no need to say the mugger ran off like a beaten dog, whining. * This troper has pulled a variety of the "I'll see your 6 inches and raise you 35", except it was more "I'll see your baseball bat and raise you a Kwan Dao" (Imagine a Chinese Broadsword (but much nastier with a large secondary spike) on the end of a 6 foot long pole with a foot spike on the other end that can be used as a bludgeon), except that it was to a would be burglar in the tropers own home after

getting back from a training session carrying the aforementioned weapon. Fun fact: People will say anything to get away from a man carrying a big, evil looking polearm who has just knocked their baseball bat aside with a psychotic grin (it's the only thing really threatening about this troper, I'm not exactly tall or heavy). This troper called the police, burglar tries to escape past this troper, Hilarity ensued. The police arrived to find me sat on top of the burglar (who had tripped over the foot spike end of the staff section) with his head facing the floor, with the staff section pressed against the back of his neck, while he blubbered like an infant. * This Troper has had this happen on occasion. He is a self trained martial artist who knows a thing or two about it. A large bully, several feet taller than the troper, thought it'd be a bright idea to put him in a headlock from behind and had been picking on him quite a bit before that. The Troper responds by grabbing his arm and flipping him over their shoulder into a chair directly in front of them. Said bully had one of the greatest OhCrap faces this troper has ever seen. On another occasion, a pully tried to punch the troper and ended up having their punch reversed and a nerve hold applied. Both bullies never picked on the Troper again. They likely get it from their MamaBear mother, who in middleschool was bullied by a high schooler and replied by grabbing her ponytails, pulling her down to face level, and applying several quick punches to the face. Later in life, her abusive husbend was normally ignored, due to waiting for the time when the troper's mother had proof he was cheating on her. When she had it, she gave him the boot. He refused to leave. [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome Cue abusive husbend being beaten out of the house with an ash tray.]] * This troper has a very good friend who resembles nothing so much as a severely unshaven, extremely portly Jack Black. Like Mr. Black, the friend in question is no paragon of intimidation value. This came up when he was accosted in the course of his work (delivery services) by a man brandishing a knife, demanding his money and his keys. Said friend clearly weighs in excess of 300 pounds, is a rabid fan of Olympic wrestling, and [[{{Acrofatic}} is quite spry for a person his size.]] I have no doubts he is as capable a battering ram as his story suggested, and I've yet to have another a casual chat that honestly involved the phrase "[[ARareSentence He didn't expect me to come at him, so I ran into the mailbox just to be sure I got him]]." I am beginning to suspect why said friend [[TheAlcoholic drinks so much.]] * This troper, due to living in a very peaceful neighborhood, hasn't got a real life version of this. However, he had a situation once where someone attempted to blackmail him over the internet using sensitive information. Sensitive information [[TooDumbToLive which I had already told everyone about.]] I saved that PM and made sure everyone knew about it until they eventually left the forum. * [[{{@/Amethystasheryn}} I'm]] not badass; I'm just passiveaggressive enough to give the very few would-be bullies around here a second thought or two. My Mom's family are the monsters you don't want to mug, though: My cousins collect swords, most of the family keep guns, and the majority of them are very big and have lungs they probably stole from drill sergeants. In a less generalised example, my Mom made sure and certain bullies didn't pick on her or her friends in

school. She was a perfect target: Totally blind, barred from using a cane, and a bit of a doormat ... but they stopped picking on her after she slapped one boy completely off his feet, punched another girl multiple times in the face, and shoved and locked somebody else into their own locker. She'd probably do even better for herself now, since she's taking martial arts classes. ---"Wanna get back to {{Mugging the Monster}}? Fine by me... but first, hand over the valuables, [[BritishEnglish berk]]! And maybe I won't hurt y... hey? What? OW! OUCH! ARGH! STOP IT! NO, NOT THE FACE, NOT THE--" ----

MulticoloredHair * This troper has a dark chocolate brown at the roots. The tips are a light golden brown from years of sun exposure. Her hair is also curly, and has copper and blonde strands throughout. In certain lights, you can pick up five colors. Added to that is the dyed purple layer, which has faded to a pinkish burgundy in some places. It's rather fantastic * This Troper has two thick dyed strands, red and black, but even without them you can find almost-blonde-brown, brown-brown and almostblack-brown on her head, depending on where you look. * This troper is an example of multiple hair tropes, due to having natural hair that no one can decide what color is it. Pull out three hairs from her head, and you're bound to find [[FieryRedhead red]], [[BrainyBrunette brown]], and [[DumbBlonde golden blond]] strands. It drives her a little crazy. ** I studied with a girl that was exactly like you. I could tell she didn't dye her hair because she was from a fairly strict family, and I studied with her since we were small kids (around 7). The girl still has a multitude of colors on her hair, and if YouGottaHaveBlueHair was real, she would have rainbow hair. *** I had a friend with hair like that too. She found it abhorrent and bothersome, but I could only keep telling her that I absolutely loved it and that I wish I could trade my own boring black hair for hers. Sigh. ** This troper also has such hair. * From a distance, [[EddieVanHelsing this troper]] has rich brown hair. If you're close enough to kiss him however, you'd see that he has red strands, blond, strands, and several white strands through his hair instead of being straight brown. His blue eyes are also ringed with gray around the pupils, and his beard is a mix of red and black strands. * This Troper is actually considering dying some of her hair (which is dark brown in color) either red or green. * This troper's hair is a mix of different shades of brown and darker blonde. Recently though, I have a couple of patches of hair surrounding my face that are yellow-blonde. Sometimes it looks orange in certain light. * My hair is very dark brown, almost black. My beard however is brown,

red, and oddly, blond. My father also had a red/brown mix in his beard with brown hair. ** [[KooriRenchuu This troper]] wonders if you are him. Because this is exactly how his hair works. * This troper owned a pet rat whose head fur was three shades of brown with a couple of small patches of completely natural GREEN. * In fall 2008, [[CaptHayfever I]] developed a single golden hair in my otherwise pitch-brown bangs. It hasn't spread at all, but it also doesn't go away after haircuts. * This troper has a friend with naturally blonde hair that contains the stock highlights for that kind of hair colour-- reddish-gold, brown, and so on. She also has a small but noticeable streak of [[WhiteHairedPrettyGirl silver-white]] that she'd had since birth. She's also got blue eyes with a brown version of that starbust pattern coming in around the pupils. It's... cool. * [[{{Smerf}} This]] troper went to high school with a guy who's hair color changed every week. We even had a betting pool on what color it would be. He then went to college, and his first class included a guy with a 12" mohawk. Each spike was a different color. Currently, one of his best friends has 5 different colors in her hair. ** The troper himself refuses to dye his hair. He went through years of hell for having red hair. Plus it looks like crap when he dyes it (did it for Halloween a couple of times). * This troper has sort of multicoloured hair, in that his Hair is dirty blonde, his moustache is bleach blonde, his beard is red, and the rest of his hair is brown, except his arm hair, which is white. All un-dyed. * This troper has occasionally wound up with multicolored hair due to hair dye washing out faster on some parts of her hair than others. (Specifically, what usually happens is that the damaged ends soak up dye and hang onto it, while the healthy hair on the top of my head loses its color quickly.) This was only really noticeable with the purple/blonde combination, though. * This troper's hair is a mix of blonde and brunette which is amplified by her curls, which catch the light weird and make it look like the colors vary even more. * This feline at heart troper's hair is naturally blonde with red streaks. I dye my bangs purple to complete the effect. * This troper's hair is actually in multicolored layers. At the roots, it's white. Above that is blonde. Then amber. Then hazel. And topped off with brown. And black eyebrows. * This troper has had multicolored hair both naturally and artificially. My hair is currently a bleached white blond, but naturally, it's a medium/darkish blond with reddish highlights (my eyebrows and arm hair look reddish in sunlight...) that sometimes has black or dark brown individual hairs growing randomly. I also have brown eyebrows, eyelashes, and arm and leg hair. Back in the day, I've had blue hair with orange bangs and bleached hair with pink bangs. * The hair on [[JET73L This Troper]]'s scalp is three colors- copper, gold, and clear. The rest of his body includes an extremely red beard with blonde highlights, blonde, black, pale grey, and either dark grey or a really odd shade of light brown or shiny black.

* This troper once saw a little boy who had black hair with patches of blonde. It was NOT dyed. ** Interestingly, she heard his mother explaining to another woman that "he has a 'piebald condition.'" * [[{{MiraShio}} My]] hair is brown, period. It's a lustrous, vivid shade of brown in the light; if it's dim, though, it looks dull. Look closely enough and you'll find some blonde strands. * This troper's hair cannot be called a single color. The undermost layers are brown,the middle ones are dark blond, and some outside layers are redish dark blond. To confuse thing even more, I dye my bangs yellow. And I once also had black streaks. * [[Tropers/FearTheWolf This Troper]] has hair that's made up individually of blond, brown, black and red strands. However, that's just the head hair - his eyebrows, facial hair, etc is all a very faint blond, and almost invisible against his skin. * This troper is a brunette, but has areas of golden hair, and a golden sheen. In summer, particularly noticeable golden highlights emerge. In addition, this troper has a more mild reddish undertone, and sometimes the two different undertones will make her hair appear orangish in some areas. * This Anonymous Troper once knew a guy in scouts that would dye his hair two or more colors every single day. He used kool-aid to get the effect, so it washed out when he took a shower. Looking back, It's a miracle it did not attract flies. * A close friend of T.T.'s has dark brown hair on top, but, if he doesn't shave for a few days, he grows a ginger-red beard. * This troper's (usually) blond, but his hair changes shades very erratically. A week or so in the sun can change it from almost brown to light blond/almost white. In the time between extremes, though, it looks... odd, with a very sharp gradient between light on top and dark at the sides. Combined with an odd case of central heterochromia, it's been cause to put his hair/eye color down as "indeterminate/indeterminate" more than once. * This troper's otherwise brown hair has a lot of blonde strands in it, due to it having started off blonde. Teenage hormones caused it to darken, but it lightens somewhat when exposed to sunlight. Or, at least, it did before he grew it out to the point where changes get washed out. * This troper has light brunette hair, with random blonde, darker brunette and black strands all naturally occurring. People never believe me when I tell them my highlights are natural. * This troper has mostly brown hair, but it's got a bunch of red and blonde strands too. And it's really curly. Think Shirley Temple, but longer. Plus, this troper has eyes that are grey-green-blue with gold around the pupil. What gives? * This Troper has reddish dark blonde hair from a distance, but on closer inspection, has layers of different colors that get darker the deeper they are. Along with that, there's a [[SkunkStripe solid blonde streak]] down the back from sunbleaching while it was up. Also, there are blue streaks in the bottom layer, placed so that they are hidden until I put my hair up or until the wind hits it and blows it everywhere.

* This tropette's hair is black with red, brown, blond and PURPLE highlights in it. If that's not a rainbow, then I don't know what is. * This troper's hair is an evenly spaced mixture of black, brown, and red that varies heavily between brown and read depending on the way the light hits it. His goatee, on the other hand, is entirely red with a jet-black stripe down the middle. His eyebrows are black. All of this is 100 percent natural. * This troper has a friend (who's in his mid-20s) whose hair is a mix of black and white. As in, maybe 95% of his hairs are completely black, and the remaining 5% are completely white, with no gray hairs whatsoever (and the white hairs are distributed randomly throughout his scalp). Apparently it's a genetic thing; his father has similar hair coloration. * This troper is the only one among his friends with any ability for growing facial hair, which I am very proud of. However, for some reason, the hairs of his mustache are both brown and straight white, even on the same strand. No clue why, considering he's only 19. * This troper has blonde, red, and light brown mixed in her hair. I'm partially German, Russian, Sweedish, Irish, ''and'' English. Appearantly, the genetics from all my ancestors seemed to have gone to me, because my hair is almost a natural rainbow. * This troper's father has a white/gray beard, but very very dark brown, almost black, hair. * This troper has reddish and white strands on his beard. They only appear after 2 weeks or so without shaving, so it might be caused by sun bleaching. * this troper has this naturally. his hair is mostly dark brown with bits of red, blonde and black in places which ofted results in people asking if it's been dyed. * Highlights: First it was purple. Then it was a slightly different shade of purple. Then it was bluish-purple. Now it's green. But it's not suppose to be true green - more turquoise. But I'm too poor at the moment to buy more dye so it's fading. Next year, I'm thinking pink. Oh, my basal hair is grayish-brown. ---Go back to Main/MulticoloredHair, but take this free sample of rainbow hair dye with you before you leave. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MultinationalTeam * The invitation-only AIM group The Shambala Summit, (of which This Troper is a member) has members from literally all over the map. Most of the group (including This Troper) are [[EagleLand Americans]], but there are also a [[CanadaEh Canadian]], [[BritainIsOnlyLondon Brit]], [[NorseByNorsewest Swede]], an [[SimSimSalabim Indian]] ([[CaptainObvious from India]]), someone from [[EastIndies the Philippines]], and even a [[AnimeLand Japanese person]]. The time-zone difference between some of those regions is so great that there will never be a time when all the group's members are online simultaneously. (This fact is probably an inconvenience for the

Asians.) For bonus points, there are only about twenty of us in the group. So yes, the Internet makes this TruthInTelevision. * This troper is writing a story about a multinational team of superheroes. The two leaders are a time-traveler from Rome and a scientist from Antarctica; the [[LoadsAndLoadsOfCharacters very large]] team has heroes from America, Canada, Australia, Cuba, Estonia, Germany, South Korea, Russia, France, Norway, Micronesia, Finland, Greece, Brazil, Italy (two members-twins), Turkey, England, Iceland, Egypt, Japan, Hungary, South Africa, China, India, The Netherlands, Lithuania, The Philippines, Israel, & Ukraine. * This troper worked at an English academy in South Korea. We had at least one person from almost every native English-speaking country: American, Canadian, British, Irish, New Zealand, Australian, and South African. We worked alongside the Koreans as well, of course. * This troper once had an idea for a mecha musume combat team called Phantom Force, with members from the countries that used the F-4 Phantom II. He got as far as the Japanese leader, her Egyptian second in command, and Israeli, German, and Korean team members before giving up. Go back to {{Multinational Team}}, [[{{Gratuitous Spanish}} pronto]], [[{{Gratuitous French}} mon capitan!]] [[{{Gratuitous German}} Schnell!]]

MultipleChoicePast * This troper's friend has claimed, at different points, to be the Devil, the Grim Reaper and the Anti-Christ. He hasn't told us which one is true yet. * Maybe the Devil and the Anti Christ have a Syaoran Jr and Sr. Deal going: the devil is the reincarnated clone of his son. * So I put up on {{Facebook}} a photo of me and a friend who just had a surfing accident and has his arm in a cast. Two other FB friends of mine ask what happened with his arm. To the first, I reply, "[[HoYay Rough love, baby]]." To the second, I reply, "[[RuleOfCool Wildebeest wrestling]]." I wish [[WhatCouldHaveBeen more people had asked]].

Click [[{{MultipleChoicePast}} here]] to go back. Or [[MultipleChoicePast here.]] Or even [[MultipleChoicePast this way]], it's all probably canon.

MummiesAtTheDinnerTable * My grandma's been with me all of my life (18 years), homeschooling me and being basically a mother to me. One of the most kind and loving people you could ever meet, even if she was a fundie, but her doctrine was mostly... benevolent. [[MadeMyselfSad Unlike her cancer]], which she died of on May 11, 2011, after a couple years of getting progressively weaker... It didn't hit me until the funeral visitations when I saw her body in the coffin. My sanity was flying out the door, and I wanted to scream so freaking loud (which I did when I got home).

I wanted to either take her body home with me so I could pretend she was still alive, play Monopoly with her, and drive her around to nice places, or crawl in the coffin with her, hugging her until I died, too. Maybe our bodies would be together for a possible upcoming ZombieApocalypse... and worst of all, I'm still not over her death, which I had to be a pallbearer for.

Munchkin * An interesting version: A Munchkin GM. This troper's GM created a new game and system from the scratch. Our [=PCs=] were members of a Naruto-esque millitary town and acepted missions. The missions weren't well paid (Most of them resulted even in monetary loses, since medical cares and equipment taxes did cost more that the mission redward) When my character, armed with a stick for TWELVE SESSIONS was able to pick up a sword from a dead enemy, the GM shouted me, said that it was playing dirty, "If you can steal weapons from the corpses, why does shops exists?" and the town's police put my poor character in a trial. Just for picking up a sword from a corpse. Bonus point when another player just received a minor scold from killing and eating a civillian from another town!! * The main article says "A more audacious one [Munchkin] (a cross with The Loonie) takes advantage of his knowledge the power to do incredibly crazy things that their fellow players will be telling their children about in years to come." This accurately describes a friend of mine. He managed, for sheer hilarity, to make a character that can do 30d6 + 65 + 1d10 damage in one round in 4th edition [=DnD=], then called him [[CaptainFalcon Chaplain Falcon]]. That, by the way, was with a character where every stat was 13. Apparently, he could have got it to about 40d6 or higher, but wanted to get a box of d6s, remove a few, roll the contents of the box, and watch the DM's face. He then made a character who does more damage with his basic attack or at-will power than with any other power, and gets more attacks every time he misses. The newest character he's brought in can choose to teleport whenever he could shift, but every time he teleports, he does damage to any enemies adjacent to the square he just left. If he kills anything, he gets to shift a square, but he can choose to teleport twice instead, etc. Everything, including . A remarkably amusing guy, who's fully capable of playing normal characters, and helps everyone else in the group to work together better. ** He's also secretly the FinalBoss of the campaign. Don't tell the [=DMs=]. * My first gaming group had one of these. Zig-zagged a bit in that while he played to win and be the big hero, he had no concept of the rules to exploit. (Or any sense of group tactics for that matter.) He was also a bit of the {{Butt Monkey}} in real life and that carried over, though it was his own damned fault in this case. He would say what he wanted to do before the DM had even finished describing the room he walked into (leading to some laughs), tried to use a Sun Rod to burn something when he was told again and again that it's a magical flashlight and not a torch and that he's got a very sharp axe handy,

and tried attacking a cockroach simply because he missed a fight and wanted to do something. He was treating the game as if it were a one player RPG, with the challenges coming to him automatically, that we were [=NPCs=], and he even questioned the DM as to why nothing was happening for him when it was only his own choices that landed him in spots where nothing was happening. In short, he was being {{Wrong Genre Savvy}} to an irritating degree. It got to the point where everyone at the table wanted him dead, as a paladin and a friend I acted to defend him. Mine own objection probably was the only thing that stopped them; and that's the meta view, had they choose to do so in-game I doubt I could take on a Fighter, Ranger, Cleric, and a Druid all at once. (I agreed he was being difficult, but everyone sure as hell wasn't making it any easier on him.) * This troper's group is rife with several different flavors, or in our Vernacular, Flange monkeys. Flange is the embodyment and essence of what munchkins run on, it is their lifeblood, composed of obscure sourcebooks and questionable phrasing. Two in particular are guilty of this, though others try occasionally. The two guilty parties are vastly different: ** The one currently around maintains flangey combos such as the thrikeen with 4 picks of wounding, the master of shrouds with a shadow entourage that reduced most situations to husks in a round or two whilest being the party healbot as well and would likely be the dominant flange monkey (he even abuses the local LARP rules for maximum flange) were it not for the fact that he's reasonable about it, such as making sure his shadows were turned over occasionally rather than amassing an army of them. ** The second is illustrated by my first adventure with him as a colleague. I was playing a negative energy cleric/necromancer and he was playing a [[OhCrap Paladin of slaughter]]. My view of the combat matte was obscured by a box of minis so I never realised I was raising my undead whilest right next to the psychotic [[TooDumbToLive Chaotic evil paladin.]] For some reason the munchkin in question interpreted his character class as "battle the forces of evil...with sociopathic anger!" rather than being a despoiler of all things good and basically a base class blackguard. He dropped my cleric (again, a party healer and meatshield provider as well as the main buff dispensary) to negative hitpoints in a single turn (We were only level 6 and it was my first character bar my monkeygrip spear fighter) and was only stopped from killing me when two [=NPCs=] on our side restrained him. The first issue is that he dropped me for comitting an evil act in a primarily evil party, technically a good act and causing him to fall as a Palladin of slaughter, secondly, he was blatantly using the class as a way to be an even bigger arsehole than usual to the party and be praised for it. This is a bloke who frequently would fudge stat dice rolls and roll paladins just to be an arse to people. What's even worse is that in LARP on the mainland (where he currently lives) he was just made the [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel head of one of the factions, a defacto king.]] ** Additionally, I'm about to take a wander down this path myself by playing my old {{Legacy character}} Zenmaru Rathalos in a new iteration, Zenmaru [[MeaningfulName Rakshas]]. Zen was originally a

fast witted ambassador for an affably evil cult back in my WoW roleplaying days, eventually driven to become an assassin by circumstance when his leader achieved {{Lovecraftian Superpowers}} and was then decapitated and killed. From there he became a ruthless, sadistic psycho for hire and the server's pre-eminenant Dragon to the major cult leaders. All of them. His reputation as a master of many weapons and a skilled torturer made him infamous and his undeath rendered him eternally living, even if reduced to dust. He saw every upgrade under the sun, from steampunk cyberware to innovating new weapons technologies he invented (having made his living as a master engineer/arms dealer). He even managed to get happily married and used a mix of his engineering skill and his wife's alchemical skills to artificially manufacture his own twin daughters from chunks of his own soul and the carcinoma that was his flesh following his regeneration experiments. Then his wife left him for her superior officer and his old rival for best swordsman in the land. Cue a BSOD that claimed the lives of dozens of innocent elves that reacted to his provocations and his aquisition of both major inns in his home city, a vast arms empire and caches of weapons around the city in addition to infiltrating the local guards long enough to install an arcane scrying system all around town. His rule eventually ended in a lab explosion when his base was raided by a combined force of the elite guards and state security. He survived by sealing himself in a monolith made of a strange non-newtonian metal that was rigid while immobile and liquid when touched. This incarnation will greatly play on his old mad scientist tendencies by abusing the symbionts and grafts rules in the fiend folio to give him ludicrous bonuses and abilities that usually cause horrendous ability damage that he's immune to as an undead, he's using an obscure {{gamebreaker}} weapon from a splatbook that is a 1 handed spiked chain with higher damage and a 17-20 crit range in 3.5, something utterly unheard of previously, and it's made from Kaorti resin, giving it a X4 crit multiplier. He dualwields them. With keen his crit chance is around 33% and sinze he's wielding large versions the crits will cause 8D6 damage before strength, weapon enchantments or magic. He has a constant +4 to strength from a symbiont which also gives him 1D12 damage natural weapons at will. He also has a fear gaze, mind blast attack, psionic domination abilities, can read thoughts, can rage as a barbarian (again, symbiont), has a +4 innertial armor ability at will, has 60ft blindsight and what class is he I hear you ask? Pure level 12 Pathfinder ranger. This doesn't even take into account stats, magical equipment (beyond symbionts and strongarm bracers, free and cheap respectively), skills or class abilities. Statblock available here http://www.mythweavers.com/sheetview.php?sheetid=241059 . * (Note: This is about the Munchkin game. Sew.) In the first game this troper played with a chum, just to get a grip of the rules. On his ''first hand'', he got a Bowling Pin, 1-handed, an '...Of The MiddleAged Gods', which, when used on a weapon, decreased the number of hands it used by one, and Brass Knucks, which didn't need hands. Without having to use any hands, he got +6 to damage. He called it 'The Hovering Death Bowling Pin Of The Middle-Aged Gods'. * This troper is fairly new to {{Pathfinder}}, but one of the new

additions to the gaming group was a Munchkin as soon as he appeared. He spent so long making his character before the session that he was STILL filling out the character sheet up to his appearence, and was constantly asking questions to the guy who had the sourcebooks. The details are cloudy, but he was playing a homebrew race and class that gave him an absurd amount of combat skill; his first stat rolls were ''denied'' by the DM for being unnaturally high, but the second set were as suspiciously as high as possible. With the addition of his racial and class bonuses, his level 3 character had over 20 in several stats, including a dexterity modifier of ''+12'' (he became the de facto airship pilot due to the Pilot DC being 10, meaning it was almost impossible for him to fail); naturally, his charisma modifier was -8 and he got -10 Perception in daylight, along with natural dark vision. Nobody is quite sure why the DM allowed his character. ** Naturally, he does not yet know that this troper's inquisitor has a Light spell, which instantly blinds him. Should he piss off the group.... * This troper loves to subvert this trope. I'll make a character that exploits the rules to be overly powerful, then give him a trait that makes him average or below avergae. Example: In a zombie survival RP I created a character that had been trained since birth to be a supersoldier, was a master with guns, knows 5 styles of martial arts, and was injected with a serum that made him far and beyond stronger than a normal human. But he was forced to kill his parnets after they were infected and has had little actual social contact. As such he's emotionally unbalanced and generally unstable. When he fights he tears through the zomibes, but half the time he'll break down and cry in the corner rather than fight. * There is a spell in 3.5 that allows you to transmute one object into anything else. I forgot the exact name, but it goes that it cant be anything valuable, or a specific person and you can create 100 ft^3 worth of material per level. While playing a good ol' fashion epic level campaign, the Mage of the group decides to cast this on a gold coin that he threw at a enemy to turn it into a several ton brick of steel. Combined with a True Strike spell, the epic battle for the end of the campaign was cut short when the Black Dragon was instantly squashed with OVER 36 MILLION points of damage. Lampshaded by every person in the party, including onlookers and the DM. ** There's a theoretical version of this example that this other troper saw on the OoTS forums: Namely an epic level caster using the spell aluded to to create a collosal mass of Anti-osmium, the anti matter equivalent of the densest element known to mankind. When antimatter hits matter there's an explosion. This manouver is done from upper orbit. The combination of impact ( like pimp-slapping the Earth with the moon, where the moon is the weight of a solid gold 1:1 scale model of the sun.) and the ensuing reaction there was enough damage to completely vapourise most if not all of the planet. * This troper GMs for a group of mostly Munchkins, a couple Loonies, and an unclassifiable person. (Our 'core' group of people consists of a Loonie/Munchkin hybrid, a hardcore ruleslawyering min maxing munchkin, a quiet munchkin who likes to kill everything in sight, and someone who actually roleplays.) It's living hell for this troper. The

system we use is GURPS, which has led to such questions such as "Why can't I have dexterity of 4?" "Why can't I take 10 disadvantages?" "What do you mean I can't take this completely irrelevant disadvantage for 100 extra character points?!"... And don't even get me started on the rules lawyering that takes place. * This troper was playing a game of Munchkin a while back, and his friends had to swear off the game forever after he and another player got into a literal fistfight over who was breaking the rules and being a munchkin in general. (Yes, we know, that's the point of the game.). * Munchkin Cthulhu: I was playing Munchkin Cthulhu with 3 other people and the dungeon expansion, after the group voted to kill me, before my first turn, as a dungeon affect, I came back with a very good hand. Because of my Prehistoric Ax(+5), My Miner's Helmet (+2), Professor Telsas's Electrical Protective Device (PAT. Pending)(+4),a Flamethrower (Created Using Cinematic Rules)(+4), as well as being one of three cultists (+4), with a Backback Full Of Dynamite (+6) the first thing I fought was Great Cthulhu (Level 20) I beat him, alone, 26 to 20 on my first turn. And adding injury to insult, I got to keep my Backpack Full of Dynamite because I rolled a 6. * Years and years ago, This Troper participated in a ''Slayers'' RPG at his local anime con (the game's maker said he was trying to sell the game; to be honest I don't know if he had anything to do with the later BigEyesSmallMouth d20 suppliment). One guy insisted upon playing the daughter of Lina and Gourry, complete with all her father's swordfighting skill (and his InfinityPlusOneSword) and all her mother's magic (inlcuding the Dragon Slave). My character died pretty quickly and I was offered the chance to roll up a new character, but when I said no, the GM had a look on his face that said "I completely understand". * This Troper, while playing as a rouge, was a version of this. At the beginning of the campaign, he was taken into slavery. So, he decided to rip of his fingernails and use them as a lockpick. When he was told he couldn't rip through them, he waited till they were long enough and sneak attacked a guard with them. he then proceeded to go to the guard house and sneak attack every single one, arguing that it was night time, so they'd all be asleep. And that was only the beginning.... ----

MundaneSolution * This troper has fixed both an Xbox and a computer monitor with a slap. * My dad once fixed our old station wagon with the piece of an eraser, on a job that would have cost about $700 for some reason... ** ''How??!!'' * My dad once patched his tire with a carpet scrap and a gob of tile adhesive. It would've been fine if my mom hadn't yanked the [=MacGyvered=] tire patch out of its hole. * At work, the exhaust pipe for the server room air conditioning system had become loose from the wall, and hot air was pouring into the room. Hot air + servers = KABLOIE! My coworkers were frying their brains thinking how to reattach the pipe to the wall, considering it

had severely deteriorated. My solution? Use a stick I found laying around to hold the pipe in place. * This troper uses Microsoft Word to count all of her friend's writings by putting it into a document, each title on a new line, and then hit 'word count.' It counts not just her words but the number of lines as well. Simple and accurate. ** This troper is vaguely confused. Every Word Processor he's ever heard of has this ability, and MS word shows it on the bottom. Why are you doing it for her? * Our aboveground pool had several small rips in the bottom that appeared when it was full. Instead of emptying and patching it, we just applied (waterproof) band aids while full. The water pressure kept them in place long enough that by the time they were loose, it was time to pack it up already. * During a game of Paintball, I fell down a hill, snapping the barrel of my gun in pieces. They said I wouldn't be able to play efficiently without one, and I didn't have any cash for a new one. What did I do? Duct tape, baby. Did pretty well to * A seasoned LARPer can fix any of their gear or indeed anything with Duct tape, WD40, cable ties and a stick/foam board. This abiity makes the Health and safety people cry themselves to sleep every night. In the case of the [[BadAssArmy Brotherhood of Fenris]] they made some of the nicest shields in the mainland's system in their garages and in the case of [[ASongOfIceAndFire The Night's Watch]] they made several hundred throwing knives in a kitchen with latex foam and a latex spray. The knives remain infamous in the system as Throwing weapons are a very cheap skill to buy which is ballanced by the expense of the phys-reps and the frequency of their loss. [[GameBreaker We walked onto the battle-field with 200 throwing knives that we didn't give a crap about.]] * This troper often fixes her dorm room television with light punches. (I blame the brokenness on the fact that it's a CRT monitor circa 1997, and my roommmate left it in the August sun for several days.) ---Why don't you just use your mouse to go back to MundaneSolution? * Wow! I wish I had thought of that! ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MundaneUtility * I came to think that {{Nanomachines}}, that could do almost any task with atomic precision, would be really awesome, the day my family gathered for a birthday party, and, while in a broad daylight, turned on the lights during the entire party for no reason whatsoever. [[{{Conversational Troping}} I wish I had nanomachines just to shut down the lights and get away with it.]] ** [[Tropers/ElodieHiras It's me again]]. Nanomachines could be used to smuggle music into classrooms, would be more practical than a walkman, playing music directly into your brain, and could makes you unable to even hear your parent's rant/annoying little sibling crying

etc... It would also be a very practical way to cheat at exams. * This troper can't help but think that biotics from MassEffect would make for one of the most awesome ways ever for cleaning your teeth. I mean, just imagine! No need to cause gum pain with a brush when you can just pull off all that plaque with soft mass effect fields! * My chemistry teacher used liquid nitrogen to freeze fruits for us to eat. He also froze a part of hot dog in a glove and smashed it, claiming it was his finger. We've also used Hydrogen and Oxygen gasses to make rockets. This happened a lot in chem... ---Use your awesome superpower to go back to [[MundaneUtility the main page]]

MurphysBed [[foldercontrol]] [[folder:Anonymous Tales]] * This troper's sister was a victim of this version[[hottip:*:''(ed: a Lawnchair Jackknife)'']] several years ago, and refused to sit in that chair ever again. * This troper was recently at a campout where we were all given little cots. Some of the cots were broken, and would fold up if pressure was applied. We managed to fix them, and as we were settling in for bed, someone mentioned that it would be funny if one person's cot folded up on them, and the disturbance caused the next person's cot to fold up and so forth. It didn't happen, [[CrowningMomentOfFunny but the laughter kept us awake for quite some time.]] * This troper's murphy bed was not spring-loaded in the least, requiring a latch to keep it in the wall. Cue the hilarity when one day, while walking across the room, the latch fails and the bed falls out on him... luckily, he caught on when the wood splintered and literally caught on to the bed while it was falling before it could hit his head. * This troper's bed wasn't well built, the slats are very bendy, and she has often woken up because the slats 'popped' out and part of her mattress hit the floor. * This troper's matress has a habit of falling off its frame. It hasn't done so in a while, but when it does... * My gaming couch sometimes breaks when I least suspect it. [[/folder]] Huh, well this [[MurphysBed looks like a good spot]] to lie do[[AmusingInjuries gyaaaargh!]] ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MushroomSamba * This Troper had one when she was little. Although she wasn't sick, it still qualifies. One night, This Troper had a lucid dream where

there were a bunch of bugs crawling '''across thin air''' and a giant spider (about the size of a fist) kept trying to get to This Troper, but some force was blocking it. {{It Got Worse}} for her when she saw that a bathrobe on the bed transformed into a couple of snakes. Then, This Troper ends up in a wedding ceremony with these snakes. This Toper manages to wake up for some time, but, when she fell back asleep, '''the dream pretty much picked up from right where it ended'''. After waking up from the second part of the dream, This Troper ended up watching cartoons for the rest of the night downstairs for fear that the snakes and bugs were real. * This troper had a seriously bad cold/flu after literally not being sick for years (always remember to wear your long underwear when it's snowing, kiddies, and don't eat ice cream in the snow...especially if you're lactose intolerant!), which led to a high fever (106 is a normal fever for her, but this was probably higher) and...very strange dreams. The one caused by the fever was actually a fully-awake heightened state of awareness, in which she felt aware of every single bit of her body. Yes, every bit. She could feel the individual cells overheating, the aqueducts (blood vessels, but they felt like aqueducts) starting to run dry, the sweat glands working overtime...and weirdly, she could feel the individual brain cells working to produce this state of awareness. This was the point when the conglomerate entity she had become decided to take some aspirin (should have done THAT sooner!). The problem with this was that the aspirin was in the downstairs bathroom, and troper's bedroom was upstairs...and she could only control her body as a conglomerate entity, not as the individual we're used to. This led to troper crawling through the hall and down the stairs (backwards) across the living room and into the bathroom, where she somehow managed to pull herself up by holding onto the sink in order to get at the medicine cabinet...and meanwhile, the entire world was being seen/felt/sensed from the very unstable viewpoint of every single nerve ending in her body. Thankfully, the aspirin were chewable! She managed to get back up to bed, and the next thing she knew, she was one person again, coughing her head off and freezing in sweat-soaked bedding. This led to the next stage of the fun...cough syrup! Yep, don't take cheap store-brand cough syrup when you've been hallucinating. Troper still feels uncomfortable talking about those dreams, so suffice it to say that they were soul-searing. It all started out with her being a duck walking down the red carpet at the Academy Awards...sound funny? Yeah, it would have been if she wasn't a duck! Troper actually vividly felt she was in a duck's body, feeling her webbed feet on the carpet, seeing through eyes on the sides of her head, breathing through nostrils in a beak, moving like a duck...but she still had her own human consciousness, making being in a duck's body sheer horror because she didn't know if she was ever getting out. And...well, after that [[ItGotWorse It Got Worse]]. She will always respect the shamans who make spirit journeys in animal bodies...it doesn't matter how real or otherwise they are, it must take a lot of courage to willingly go back to that. Interestingly, a later experience with the cough syrup but no fever led to only a mildly unpleasant waking dream in which Troper's bed became a lifeboat from the Titanic. She still decided not

to take that stuff again! * This Troper's dreams are often borderline MushroomSamba, but when he goes under anesthesia for surgery, he practically trips balls. * When he gets a high enough fever(usually about 103) ThisTroper wil start to have all sorts of visual and touch-based hallucinations. One of the most common is that soft things(such as blankets) begins to fell like steel wool, and considering he's in bedrest...yeah. The visual hallucinations are much more out there. The first one had me flying in the air trying to dodge geometric balls of lead, the second one was me being trapped in a wall(courtesy of a team up with the touch-based one), the third one involoved a giant bird, and the fourth one made me almost but not quite see the walls moving. I've vowed never to take LSD btw. * This troper had a particularly interesting fever that almost left him cooked from the inside. I had been up for over 48 hours, and I had a whopping 108 degree fever. Now, i'm not completely sure if this is true due to the fact that I was tripping balls, but it was at least 106. I started hearing Ominous Latin Chanting, and I kept hearing "And as I walk through the valley of death..." I was also continuing to play video games. You have not lived until you have played Kamina fistfighting Alucard on the top of the Eiffel Tower in space while the Big Bang is going on. ...And then I had to go to bed... All the shadows turned into demons, and I tried fistfighting them in order to survive. I woke up in the morning COMPLETELY unable to move, due to almost dying. I think I remember asking my grandparents if I should call an ambulance somewhere in there, but from what I remember they just told me to sleep it off. I'm still pretty pissed about that, that was the dumbest shit ever. Thankfully, there was no longlasting internal damage, but I did end up having to go to a hospital in order to rest up. It took me about 3 days before I was able to recover. Crazy, crazy stuff. ** I think you just gave me an idea for a video game... *** [[CompletelyMissingThePoint But who would want to play a game about having a fever?]] * This troper also gets them with fevers, though they're never quite mushroom sambas. More like one creepy mushroom dancing slowly to music only it hears. Still, very memorable and highly traumatizing. One had lasting effects that made it nearly impossible for this troper to read anything for almost a year without copious amounts of background noise, without the feeling that someone was yelling the words in his year and various flashback like effects. He still shudders thinking about it. ** The actually dream involved characters from the Illiad trying to sail across his room, which apparently had turned into an ocean (Note: It still looked like my room, just with floating ships in the middle of it), and being washed back to the other side by giant waves everytime they got close. * This Troper is fairly sure that his dreams are becoming based on whatever game I played before going to bed. Last night, it was [[ToontownOnline a Sellbot VP battle]] [[LittleBigPlanet using a Paintinator]], the night before it was [[MarioAndLuigiBowsersInsideStory Broggy]] dancing in five

dimensions... Maybe I shouldn't [[TroperTales.IntoxicationEnsues chug half a bottle of soda before bed]]. * Sleep deprivation can do this too. At one time, [[{{nightboomfer}} this troper]] was awake for 36 hours. I felt like I was going to die due to something horrible happening to me that I couldn't quite comprehend. I kept seeing the room sway to the point where I felt like I was falling and kept hearing strange voices in my head. Insomnia is not a fun thing to have. * This troper once had a pretty bad fever-didn't know it at the time, though, found out in the morning-and couldn't sleep because he was Hallucinating tribal peoples' shadows dancing around my bed, chanting. * [[{{Eevee}} This troper]] was once very sick, with a fairly high fever and extremely sore throat, that was quite painful whenever she swallowed. As a result, she literally did not eat, drink, or sleep for a bit more than three days. While she wasn't hungry or tired at all TV watching got very interesting at around day 2 and a half, with multiple characters blending into one and storylines becoming very strange ([[{{Torchwood}} Jack/Ianto]], who were one person, shooting a woman in the face through the internet to keep her from leaving a room and talking to her dad, because they'd go to a bar, get drunk, and crash the car because she was busy drawing knives on the dashboard instead of steering, which would result in a rift in time and space and dinosaurs attacking]]). She decided that she'd better eat something despite how much it would hurt her throat somewhere between the sparkly fairies flying around her head and wolves in the distance howling with the voice of Antony Hegarty. * I had to get Nitrous for dental work, so my mom came to get me afterward. Not only did the name "laughing gas" apply strongly to me, I apparently greeted her with "Hi, hi, hi mom! I like your purple blouse! (it was blue) Can we get some nachos?" * I don't know how much this belongs here, but once I got a painful hit on the back of my head. In the next few minutes I saw everything in negative colors, couldn't make up one coherent sentence, and heard weird squeeky sounds in my ears. ** Kind of similar to that, I got hit on the elbow and for a couple minutes I saw most colors normally, except shadows became a rather pretty white/purple shifting color. I also couldn't feel anything anywhere and sounds were muffled. * This troper's parent had unmarked brownies hidden in the back of the fridge. They were delicious. Coincidentally? They mellowed him out. He spent the next 24 hours unconscious, having a philosophical discussion with Kamina. Best. Cat-Nap. EVER... * This troper witnesses a good example of an illness-induced MushroomSamba at a fourth grade Girl Scout sleepover. The girl whose house we were at was in sick in bed, suffering from what would later turn out to be lyme disease, but her parents welcomed us in anyway; her rash wasn't contagious, and she'd surely feel well enough to join us just as soon as her fever went down, they assured us. Instead, her fever rose to nearly 105 degrees during the night, leading her to awaken the rest of the troop by jumping out of bed at 2 AM and racing frantically up and down the hallway, gesturing into the air while

shouting "Look at the purple stars and baseballs!" * [[Tropers/LoneRonin This troper]] took a genetics class in University that involved knocking fruit flies out with ether to move them to different containers for breeding. Some idiot left the lid off the giant ether container and half the class got high before we figured out the source. * This troper's friend once convinced him to try some "delicacies"... which turned out to be peyote. We spent most of the day making out, staring into space, or enraptured by Mozart. ** Out of burning curiosity, what gender is your friend? * This troper HAS done mushrooms on a few occasions. Drank 16 cans of Dr. Pepper, puked, watched the text on my computer screen dance around, drank more Dr. Pepper, watched QVC, got scared, played video games, walked a mile, went to the gym, watched Mexican water-purifier commercials, not a bad first trip all-in-all. ** As did this troper; had a very pleasant trip, just walking around town, going to a concert and enjoying life. And from a relatively small dose. DrugsAreBad [[BrokenAesop 'mkay.]] * A few years back, my sister tripped balls on strawberries. Yes, you heard me right- strawberries. We had some in the fridge in a tupperware container. Since they weren't moldy, said sibling figured they were safe to eat. The rest of the night was followed by giggling and comments on how sparkly everything was. It turns out we had bought those strawberries about a month ago and they had fermented in the fridge. Still, this isn't the first Mushroom Samba in our household- I tend to see a giant purple lizard everytime I get a little too into painting and drawing (especially if the subject is a surreal piece). Listening to Emerson, Lake, and Palmer while sleep deprived doesn't help either... * [[Tropers/MegTheMaggot This Tropette]] once accidentally tripped on Nyquil, allergy medicine, and painkillers. While writing a paper for school. I managed to get an 'A,' somehow, but a the teacher did circle a few of the trippier passages and wrote ???? by them. * Due to claustrophobia, I was very anxious at having an MRI and was thus promised a mild tranquilizer. I don't know what the hell they gave me, but it was ''anything'' but mild. It took me about a minute and a half to start giggling and... I don't really remember much else, except that I have never before had such a good time at a hospital. * This troper once had spinal surgery, followed by LOTS of pain meds. The night after, I drempt that a figure in a hooded black cloak and dusty grey wings visited my room. I started to ask if I was awake, but she put a finger to my lips to shush me. She sat on (read: stradled) my stomach and I figured where this was going (people in Salem dreampt something like this) when she started to strangle me. (I was still breathing normally, but I also wasn't, sort of...) I reached over to the nightstand for the call nurse button, but it was too far over. I stopped struggling against the inevitable. The last thing I remember before I blacked out completely was a few strands of black hair coming loose from underneith her hood, and noticing that she had these beautiful blue eyes. And, yes, this was a good dream. * This troper was once put under Nitrous Oxide (laughing gas) before oral surgery. The problem? She wasn't told that the mask on her face

wasn't giving her oxygen, it was in fact giving her nitrous. This coupled with her receiving the IV anesthetic at the same time caused her to inexplicably (at the time) see light fixtures moving and remembering pieces of Jean-Michel Basquiat from an art book in" [[{{NightmareFuel}} vivid detail]]. * When I was about five, I decided, logically, that if a teaspoon of cold medicine was good for me, the entire bottle would be better, and even if I didn't like the taste, it would be responsible and grown-up to drink it all. I don't remember much after that, but my mother is extremely fond of telling the tale of me sitting in the ER waiting room singing "Old MacDonald" at the top of my lungs. * When I try to go to sleep with a migraine, my mind tends to freak the hell out, most of the dreams that aren't lucid could make a ''{{Widget series}}'' look tame, most of my lucid dreams tend to involve me being a werewolf...the latter [[{{Furryfandom}} I]] [[{{Gorn}} don't]] [[{{Nightmare fetishist}} really mind.]] ** Same troper adding on, if I get to sleep ''at all'' the aformentioned happen, more often I'll just end up laying there in a daze and hallucinating all kind of stuff until I finally get up and trudge to get some headache medicine, bleck. * This Troper seems to be immune to side effects of pain meds, but he does have super trippy yet realistic dreams sometimes. Also, he recently realized that he can either pick up radio signals when he's almost asleep, or his subconscious hosts a radio show in his head. Yet he was aware he was awake. * This troper experienced one of these on purpose when he and his class went to a planetarium. We were warned that we might get a bit motion-sick...and so began a mental assault of colors and flower-power age music that made me get REALLY dizzy. * [[Tropers/RAMChYLD I]] tell you, December 23rd, 2012 is when The Day Of The Barney will happen! He will get hypnotized children to kill all adults! We must ban his shows/toys/music now to prevent that! I know it's true because I saw it happen while on Asthma meds! The Goddess of Mana, Great Justice and The Light told me! (Specifically, after a very strong OD that was the result him puffing his inhaler non-stop to try to stop the pain because he was just beaten up by bullies). Yes, I read Brian Bull's The Day of The [[BarneyAndFriends Barney]], and played ZeroWing, EarthBound and TheLegendOfMana the night before and was thinking of all of them and more while puffing. Why did you ask? * This Troper lived in an apartment with a godawful mold problem in a badly ventalated bathroom. She and her roomie decided enough was enough and went to clean it. Well, we probably didn't dilute the cheapo cleaning stuff nearly as much as we should have (It was college, and we were kinda young and dumb like that). We take turns with the cleaning solution, the mop (only way to reach the ceiling), and attacking the mold. By the time all was said and done, we were giggling and lightheaded, had the coordination of drunks, and were keeping the neighbors up singing Dr. Demento tunes. Roomie, being all of five feet tall and maybe 100 pounds was hit worse than the 5'3" 150 pound Troper. * This Troper was calmly eating lunch at school, when suddenly after eating the french fries I was tripping balls to the tune of odd

patches of light. It went away for a while, but returned later that day. During senior pictures. My yearbook photo fully conveys my horror at seeing a million lightning fireflies burning themselves into my retinas. * This Troper pulled an all nighter one day; the same day he was also going camping later on. Not wanting to quit for such a flimsy reason as getting no sleep, he pitched his tent no problem, but after several hours became convinced that clones of the people he went with, including himself, were running around and a psychotic axe murderer was standing at the edge of the field (with no glasses or contact lenses, the blodgy shape he saw could certainly be interpreted as one). He refused to sleep in his tent but eventually got a good nights sleep. Up a tree. * This Troper went through heart surgery a few months ago. I have no memory of it, but my mom says that when I first woke up after the surgery I made her repeatedly check my legs because I was convinced that someone had shaved them while I was asleep. ---Go Back to [[MushroomSamba Mushroom Sam]]... Oh, hi Mister Purple Frog, Let's climb the squirrel's tail to get the platinum earbuds from the giant polka-dotted wolf. ---<<|TroperTales|>>)

MusicalWorldHypotheses * ThisTroper, OOZE, sings songs about his internal feelings when he's alone, they occasionally rhyme, and even the TUNE is improvised. I even occasionally invoke some musical tropes like DarkReprise-of songs I've sung months earlier. I've even developed leitmotifs. No idea how to write music though.. * Me to.I actually thought that I was the only one who did that.

MustHaveCaffeine * This troper has to have caffeine not because it helps, but because if I don't I get painful headaches. It has no energy boosting effect for me, but I get headaches without it. ** I think that's called withdrawal. * [[Tropers/JuiceBoxHero This Troper]] is something of an inversion: she hates caffeine and its effects on the body, but loves the taste of coffee. ** Mmm, coffee ice cream... * Ah, caffeine, the life-bringer, where would [[{{Cosman246}} This Troper]] be without you? * During and after his service, this troper has often reflected that somehow cutting off the caffeine supply would destroy the US military's combat readiness more thoroughly than a global thermonuclear war. ** Not to mention the effect on AmericanLawEnforcement. ** ...and all of emergency response in general.

** Don't forget health care. ** The entire ''concept'' of graduate school would grind to a halt upon a supply cut-off. *** Hell, America as a whole could be brought to its knees if all the Dunkin Donuts were taken out, because, as we all know, America Runs On Dunkin'. **** Thousands (I think) of Americans (Soldiers, Civilians, and dependants of soldiers) survive without Dunkin' Donuts in Germany. ***** At least the Germany this Troper lives in has plenty of Dunkin' Donuts Stores. :-) *** This troper has long joked that the smartest business decision a certain hospital system ever made was to open a Starbucks in the main lobby of each of its hospitals, keep them open 24 hours, and allow employees to pay for beverages with a badge swipe. Those have to be the most profitable Starbucks in the city. ** Historically speaking, this is not untrue in the least. Coffee was strictly rationed in America during WorldWarTwo because it basically ''had'' to go to the men 'n' boys fighting the war. And guess what Americans (well, patriots, anyway) drank after the Boston Tea Party? It wasn't tea, I'll tell you that much. ** The US Army spends more on its Coffee Budget than some nations spend on nuclear armaments. *** [[FridgeLogic Wait]], [[OverlyNarrowSuperlative don't some countries]] ''[[OverlyNarrowSuperlative not]]'' [[OverlyNarrowSuperlative spend money on nuclear armaments?]] *** I thought most nations didn't have any kind of nuclear weapons. Which means firing a single pistol round in the US military costs NaN more than most nations spend on nuclear armament! * This Troper was at [[http://www.socialism.com New Freeway Hall]] for one of their monthly meetings. I cracked a joke that if the world's ''coffee producers'' went on strike, global capitalism could be toppled in nothing flat. -->'''Old Lady Socialist:''' Yeah, honey, but you'd also incapacitate half the revolutionaries! * This troper manages it on sheer willpower. (Well, and lots of sugar.) * There are estimated to be more people in Europe addicted to caffeine than not, and the same is probably true of North America. * This troper hardly touches caffeine due to an unfortunate incident with addiction in school, ending in a broken rib for someone else for no reason other than 'they were annoying me'. * Subverted with [[LadyBealzabub this troper]]. Caffeine tends to make me tired. (Sugar on the other hand...) I still love coffee and tea though. * This troper is a rare breed- a grad student who doesn't touch coffee. ** I'm also a grad student who drinks no coffee - but simply because the best way for me to ensure projectile vomiting in the next 24 hours is a cup of coffee. Also, immune to caffeine. The only thing which seems to do anything is taurine, so I keep myself awake with cheap energy drinks - no Red Bull, though, that's the only one which has no effect on me.

* This troper also doesn't drink coffee and is an undergrad. Not quite as impressive, but still. I'll let other things kill me. ** This troper adds to the ranks of college students who don't do coffee. She hates the taste. ** Amen, sister! This troper has always wondered how people can drink enough of it to get used to and even like the flavor. ** So have I! I like the scent, but the taste? Yuck. *** I don't even like the smell. Smell, taste, all of it is awful. I have been bitterly tricked several times with coffee-flavored candies (especially in Japan) when I thought they were root-beer flavored. Ugh. I also refuse to touch energy drinks just on principle. I do quite like tea, though. *** I despise coffee, but I still need caffeine, so I drink a lot of tea. *** After making coffee for my mam since I could boil a kettle, I HATE coffee. I'm NotAMorningPerson though, so I need tea and choclate to wake me up in the morning. *** Diet coke is my poison. I hate it when people "go out for coffee", I always end up being the one asking if wherever we are has anything with no coffee in it and getting crazy looks. *** This Troper isn't anywhere near college yet, but let's see: Half of the grade has taken up coffee, some becoming Must Have Caffiners, if you will, and we all need caffine boosts in general. (thesiiiiiiss)The solution, m'colleagues? Tea. A lot of tea. Around half of what I drink. And Cola-Cola, in quantities when you * really* need a boost. Like now. *** One of the things this troper really, really, ''[[PrecisionFStrike really fucking hated]]'' about his undergraduate classes was the smell of the morning coffee his fellow students brought in. On some days it seemed like half the class had it. Mercifully, my one year of actual classes as a graduate student were generally later in the morning or in the afternoon, so I was spared the coffee stink. I'm especially proud to say that I '''never''' needed coffee to get started in the mornings. * Past college now, but, at 30: have never cared for coffee, think tea doesn't have enough flavor (though I like tea ceremony tea - thick, frothy, bright green...), reduced pop to "on occasion" a few years back. Aside from chocolate, caffeine isn't a factor in my life. Then again, I also made the decision to not get a driver's license, so count me unusual. ** I think you're me 10 years down the line. * This troper enjoys cutting off all caffeine intake each summer. Given the inevitable addiction built up over the previous months, this results in three days of sleep followed by a week-long high of sorts. ** This troper did something similar in high school, giving up all forms of caffeine for Lent. Going to Starbucks on Easter Monday and ordering my usual triple venti latte, the day of a computer science exam, probably wasn't the smartest thing I ever did. It's hard to type when your hands are shaking that badly... * This Troper's mother has a routine: The last thing she does is filling the pot with water and coffee. Then the first thing she does each morning is putting on the pot, go out on the balcony for a

cigarette and return in time for the first cup of coffee. This Troper is equally intrigued as revolted when witnessing this. * This troper actually can't have coffee, due to a stomach issue, and so turned to sodas. It was only after a 92-hour, Jolt-fueled awake period during finals that she cut the intake by half. * When this troper was 12, her stepcousin offered her a few sips of this hyper-caffenated slurry (I think it might've been Jolt) that left her buzzing for about five hours. My caffeine resistance is better nowadays: I can drink an espresso an hour before bed, no problem. Strange. * [[{{Sciatrix}} I]] enjoy an occasional cup of (usually herbal, sometimes green or white) tea and like chocolate, but that's the extent of my caffeine habit. I don't drink coffee at all (can't stand it, which makes me an oddity on a college campus) and the types of soda I prefer are invariably caffeine-free, and in any case I rarely drink soda at all. I've noticed that I am highly sensitive to caffeine when I do ingest it, however. This is probably because of the fact that I tend to try to avoid it. * While [[Tropers/DarkInsanity13 this troper]]'s caffeine intake is limited to a daily dose of chocolate and the occasional pop, several of her friends as well as her mother seem to always need a coffee or energy drink of some sorts at least once a day. It disturbs her how reliant and addicted some of her friends are to energy drinks, however her mother's need for coffee is more amusing, and it typically gets her a free bagel when her mother runs out to Tim Horton's for her daily fix on weekends. * Some of you may be familiar with the website Instructables, mad science on the small scale, this troper considers most of the coffee entries to be "for sissies." * Caffeine is useless for [[{{Cameoflage}} this troper]]: she has [[AttentionDeficitOohShiny ADHD]], and stimulants improve her ability to focus rather than energizing her, in a sort of ReviveKillsZombie effect. It's kind of annoying, because I find having to sleep highly inconvenient, and it'd be nice to be able to stay up for 24-48 hours yet feel slightly less like I got hit by a truck. ** [[{{Stoney}} This Troper]] has the same issue, but finds that drinking enough caffeine in a short enough period can cause a hyper focused state, during which you won't be tired. As soon as you stop paying attention for a second, though... ** When you think about it, Ritalin and other ADD drugs are stimulants (at least according to the doc monitoring me). This ADHD anonymous troper uses sugar-loaded coffee as a substitute for his meds whenever he can't get ahold of the real stuff. It helps, but not solves. He always wonders how many people are there who are undiagnosed because they can function normally on coffee. * This Troper had caffeine so regularly and frequently over the years that at some point he developed a RESISTANCE to the stuff. Caffeine no longer affects him, though a good supply of sugar helps keep him sane. Kool-Aid packets are cheap, thankfully. ** Contrary to popular belief, it's actually quite easy to build up a resistance to caffeine. This troper rations her intake for that very reason -- if I'm gonna take a drug that improves my performance, I

should at least be sure it does so when it counts. I suspect that a very large amount of coffee-before-work drinkers are running not so much on caffeine as the comfort of habit, with a possible placebo effect. ** [[RedneckRocker I've]] also built up a bit of an immunity to caffeine over the years (I'm a soda-drinker, actually), but I don't drink as much as I used to (for a while, I was going through the equivalent of 8-9 cans of soda ''A DAY''). My reason for cutting back? My father. I'd told him many times: "If you give up smoking, I'll give up caffeine." He hasn't given it up, but he's cut back a great deal from how much he used to smoke, so I had to keep up my part of the bargain. * This Troper became so addicted to the stuff during second year that he would pop out during lectures two or three times to fill up the largest cup the University cafe had. A week of coffee ended up costing over 25$. This does not count coffee made at home. By winter break, this troper had an expresso maker and French press which were often in use (while still buying coffee on campus). I became completely immune to the caffeine and drank it simply for the taste. The damage done to my stomach lining forced me to stop by winter break of my third year. I'm currently in a bet with several people to stay off coffee for six months. This troper's addiction to coffee is nothing short of epic. * [[{{Gerusz}} This troper]] has a Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome - he can hardly get any sleep before 2 AM. Regardless, he has to wake up at 6 AM. So after 4 hours of sleeping, he must get his fair dose of caffeine in order to function properly as a human being. And his sarcasticising circuits are always on-line, but they go off the scale without his first espresso. This led to some hilarious SophisticatedAsHell moments when somebody forgot the "Do not talk to {{Gerusz}} before his first coffee" rule. Also, he can rarely be seen without a cup of coffee during the day too. ** Recently he accomplished a nice feat: he drank only caffeinated drinks for two days. His blood ''killed a damn mosquito''. *** ~awe-stricken applause~ I think that counts as a CrowningMomentOfAwesome. *** Well, caffeine is a natural insecticide. I think that's the actual reason some plants contain it. * This troper had a coworker claim they could keep up with his caffeine intake. The first drink? A quadruple espresso. Said coworker said the next day he couldn't do that again "because it made my heart feel funny." * This troper cares much more about sugar than caffeine and enjoys caffeine-free sodas as long as they have sugar in them, as those artificial sweeteners taste revolting. He also uses the fact that heat increases the solubility of sugar to put a quarter cup of it into a single cup of tea, as otherwise it simply doesn't taste sweet enough. He can't stand coffee though, not even the smell. * This troper loves coffee, but can't handle caffeine. Seriously. If she has about one cup of coffee she becomes the hyper version of drunk, and then has to pass out for ~eight hours. Luckily, decaf has enough caffeine to perk her up a little without going absolutely batshit nuts.

* [[{{Be}} This troper]] is a shameless example of the trope. However, since he finds coffee unpalatable and hot drinks in general unpleasant, his intake comes from soda. Normally Pepsi. Lots of Pepsi. How his teeth haven't rotted and fallen out of his head is a mystery. ** ThisTroper likewise can't stand coffee or tea. His entire caffeine intake comes from Diet Coke or Coke Zero. *** This troper is the exact same way. I get all my intake from non coffee-related sources. About 70% of it is soda (or as we call it around here, Coke. Yes, it's both a generic term and and a proper name. Don't ask). I'll occasionally drink tea, but only if it's presented to me. * [[{{Chzo}} This troper]] dosen't touch coffee. He can't start his day [[MustHaveNicotine without a cigarette]], however. * ThisTroper can't actually have caffeine, not in any quantity. [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tachycardia Tachycardia]], means my heart rate occasionally jumps to up the low end of humming bird range. Caffeine seems to exacerbate the effect. Thus no more coffee, tea, or soda. Though the soda was cut out due to the fact it's like chugging syrup. ** I had a female friend who could only drink Sprite (in terms of sodas, caffeine) as a result of something like this. I think? ** Amusing inversion: a friend of this troper, who was also a physician, was always ''bradycardic'' before her first cup of coffee. Just for laughs, I checked her pulse one morning before work. Precoffee: 40. Post: 64. We used to joke that Dr. A would actually go asystolic if her blood caffeine level dropped too far. * This troper recently discovered that he actually gets ''some'' schoolwork done if he drinks coffee. If you knew me, you'd realise that that in itself says wonders for the drink. * In the recent heatwave, this troper stopped drinking coffee. A few days in I began to realise just how caffeine-dependent I am. Thank goodness I'm on holiday. (It was about a week before I realised that [[IdiotBall I could just make iced coffee...]]) * This troper hates the taste of coffee, so he doesn't drink any. * [[{{Bronzethumb}} This troper]], after waking up at 5:30am, walking to the next suburb, swimming laps in the pool that's only 20 degrees Celsius and then walking home again, likes to turn on the machine and pump out a double-strength double-shot of that sweet, sweet coffee, add three sugars and a dash of milk, downs that in a few minutes, then makes another one while he begins the rest of the morning routine. I give fair warning to everyone else: if you disrupt my caffination, I will *** your *** up. * [[{{Korval}} This Troper]] doesn't regularly drink coffee. He prefers to use it medicinally; if he's had to pull long hours, a concentrated cup of coffee is an appropriate remedy. Otherwise, no. * Charlie Brown: One troper, 3 examples! ** Father has developed caffeine ''immunity''. Because he likes the taste, '''he has a cup TO BED.''' ** It's debatable whether it's genetic: I'm currently at "highly resistant" (a cup buzzes me for an hour, tops) but definitely not at "nightcap" status. ** A close friend is an ''inversion''. A few ''sips'' of a cup of joe

and he's '''stone cold asleep''' in minutes. * [[ManCalledTrue This editor]] can't see any effect from caffeine and can't stand the taste of coffee. He suffers from a variant instead he's incommunicato until he's eaten breakfast. * This troper has been drinking coffee since she was ten, and can't function with less than 6 cups a day. ** Ditto for this troper. Although the grown up-ness my friends thought I exhibited by drinking coffee at such a young age was diffused when I told them I only drink mocha lattes. Because, you know, I totally wasn't using those teeth... * This troper recently drank 24oz. of triple caffeine coffee and now has a new favorite drink for finals week next year. ** Where can I find some of that? * This troper walks the perilous line between being both addicted and sensitive to caffeine. The addiction always wins out over the sensitivity. * This troper had been known to enjoy the occasional cup of coffee, but the bulk of his caffeine [[strike: addiction]] intake is in the form of Mountain Dew. LOTS of Mountain Dew. So far as he knows, he's only ever been wired twice: once on Mountain Dew and once on a 24 oz. cup of bottom-of-the-pot ridiculously strong coffee. After years of caffeine [[strike:abuse]] use, this troper has developed a [[{{Understatement}} fairly high]] caffeine tolerance. Ah, the cycle of addiction. ** Update: this troper has since quit drinking Mountain Dew. His coffee intake has increased exponentially. * This troper hates the taste of coffee, and only ingests energy drinks on rare and desperate occasions, like an all-night karaoke session (seriously). Soda consumption is mild, but existent. * [[{{HolocronCoder}} This troper]] will go with his coworkers to get coffee, tea, or soda at any point they go to get some. At one such trip for coffee, his coworkers finally noticed what he was putting in his coffee. This troper was getting the strongest coffee, adding a bit of cream, then about eight or so packets of sugar (for a single cup). One of the coworkers sampled it and commented that it "wasn't as sickeningly sweet as you'd expect" but "still thinks it would kill him to drink it." This troper also adores vault, mountain dew, expressos, and black teas. * This troper uses coffee for two main purposes: one, in order to be able to function correctly until noonish, seeing as she usually sleeps about 5 hours a day, 6 tops. Two, to actually ''raise'' her blood pressure -- her normal levels are 90-40 mmHg, and if she's hungry or it's mildly hot they can go frighteningly low. If she doesn't want to see tiny sparks under her eyelids when standing up, she must have some caffeine, either a soda or a cup of coffee. ** Huh. So ''that's'' why my vision used to fog over. And why it doesn't now. * [[JethroQWalrustitty This Troper's]] old boss was notorious for this. She drank full pots of coffee. * In college, this troper belonged to a club that would adjourn its weekly meetings by going to a local pub which sold soda in pint glasses. Troper's love of Mountain Dew + unlimited free refills = a

caffeine immunity which still exists ten years later. * I have 2 500ml bottles of Coke every day, near enough.I seem to have some form of caffeine immunity. * This college undergrad doesn't drink coffee because ''making it takes too long.'' When I MustHaveCaffeine, I must have it ''now.'' Instead, I substitute soda and/or iced tea in massive quantities. * {{tzecco}}, by virtue of working nights and going to school in the morning lives on the stuff. Coffee is good, but his drug of choice tends to run towards Sobe [=NoFear=]'s or the Amped drinks. However, is highly resistant so they don't last too long and has been known to be able to drop to sleep even after downing a can of energy. * This Troper read a book called the [=UnDutchables=], which is a humerous study of the Dutch people and their quirks and habits. According to one of the writers if we could hook up an IV and inject pure caffeine into our bodies and survive it we'd go for it. Fair enough, I must have one mug (Starbucks nicked, natch!) before doing anything else, and then drink my second during the course of shaving, ironing shirt, doing the hair etc. First thing he does at work after he's arrived and assessed the workload? Get a cup of coffee in the kitchen. * Please, don't forget to give the {{Quillpaw}} her Diet Coke. It has become so crucial to this troper's ability to function, that telling her teachers she can't work because she missed her morning Coke is a ''legitimate excuse''. * In an odd twist on this trope, [[AcrossTheStars this troper]] requires multiple bottles of Diet Coke at every volleyball game she attends, and also whenever she's feeling particularly tired. The rest of the time, her addiction is [=VitaminWater=] [=XXX=]. * This troper is... addicted to say the least. A tall cup of coffee is essential first thing in the morning for anything resembling function, and even then he has a tinge of a headache by the end of his school day, which leads to drinking at least 5 sodas a night (don't worry, they're all Diet), usually one just before bed. He fears the day that he gets into college, because undoubtedly, it will be even worse. * [[DaNuke Da_Nuke]]. Currently capable of drinking 2 liters of coffee when under school pressure. His stimulant of last resort is a pint of strong coffee with large amounts of glucose-rich corn syrup. More due to mental conditioning than actual risk, though, he will only touch energy drinks as an ''absolute'' last resort. * {{Dinru}} loves Mountain Dew... only problem is, one bottle is enough to turn her from {{Cloudcuckoolander}} to AttentionDeficitOohShiny (Or at least very similar). Sometimes, HilarityEnsues. Other times... [[NoodleIncident you don't want to know about the other times...]] * If it didn't upset my stomach to drink more than a cup or two at a time, I would drink coffee nonstop! I love the taste of coffee, and it really keeps me hopping all day. I love nothing more than a pot of coffee made with 5 scoops! * Thid troper is a coffee addicted high school teacher. For Lent this year, I decided to give it up (the other choice was alcohol, and any high school teacher will tell you that that's not gonna happen). Needless to say, my students learned the true definition of "evil."

* This troper sleeps 4 hours, maybe less per night during the week before Math Team competitions. Her solution to the inevitable zombieness during school? Why, a cup of triple-shot coffee, of course! It makes her a little hyper, nothing else. During camp, she does the same thing, only with soda instead. Ergo, a terrible sleep schedule. * Along with a gatsby cap, glasses and trenchcoat, 'a bottle of coke' has been listed as one of the defining features of this troper. * [[SpikyK This troper]] has a bit of a system; he does not do diddly squat until he has had coffee. Considering that neither of his first periods allow him to bring drinks in, he must chug before the bell rings. A scalded tongue is nothing compared to the head-splitting headache that would ensue in a matter of an hour without it. He can chug a cup of coffee directly before bed with no problems-- he doesn't rely on caffiene to stay awake. He relies on it to remain functional, thanks to an utterly crippling addiction complete with violent withdrawl if he doesn't have it. (It also leads to violent rebellion when the troper says "we need more soda" but his father says "we have plenty", and the 'plenty' is all non-caffienated. Who invented such a vile thing!?) * [[{{Sus}} This troper]] doesn't much care for coffee (because of the taste), but is severely addicted to other sources of caffeine (chocolate, tea, energy drinks, ''caffeine pills'' etc.). My usual first thought upon waking up: "* groan* caaaffeeeineeeee...." * This troper used to know a guy who never drank any form of caffeine. One night he was having trouble staying awake, so his visiting cousin, who couldn't live without his stovetop espresso maker, offered him a shot. The poor guy finally managed to crash around dawn. * This troper is mostly immune to caffeine... the only time she remembers where coffee had any noticeable effect on her whatsoever was when she was insomniac for three days straight, felt the crash coming on when having to go to class and then had some venti or another from Starbucks - with six shots. It only served to keep her awake until class was over, after which she went home and passed out for 14 hours. This was three hours after drinking said concoction. * This (British, [[SpotOfTea naturally]]) troper doesn't like coffee, but drinks a ''lot'' of tea. Specifically, PG Tips. Litres and litres of it. With breakfast, lunch and dinner. He's relying on it to get him through university, and he often reflects that quite apart from anything else he wouldn't survive any sort of apocalypse because of this particular necessity of his. * [[NeoSilverThorn This Troper]] requires at least one cup every morning. Failure to have one makes for a bad day for me and everyone within twenty feet. One camping trip where I'd forgotten to pack some resulted in my staring into the cooler repeating "No coffee" repeatedly. My friend heard what I was saying, ''kicked'' his brother awake with "*** , get up, there's no coffee! We've gotta go get coffee!" We ended up driving twenty minutes into town to get some. And on a similar note, another friend would have a Pepsi after school, everyday without fail. When the school ran him through a psych evaluation, they sent him to counseling because they thought he was addicted to something worse. * [[{{Skazka}} This troper]] doesn't function under high stress

without at least two bottles of Mountain Dew. Going without causes serious caffeine headaches, to the point where (since I couldn't afford a soda at school) I had the choice between drinking black tea (which I hate nearly as much as coffee) and just sucking on the black tea while it was still dry and in the bag. * This Troper started drinking coffee at age 14 and it's only gotten worse. At this point (6 years later) I have such a high tolerance for caffeine that to have a noticeable impact, I drink quadruple shots of espresso (a coffee cup, about 6 ounces, filled almost to overflowing) which works for about 2 hours. * [[SovietKitty This troper]] and her mother would be the living dead without caffeine; however, it doesn't make them hyper. It just makes them awake and alert, and even calms them down. Her mother has limits; she have yet to discover hers, if they exist. She's had a twenty-fourounce and a sixteen-ounce mocha latte in one day and felt nothing but awake and cheerful. * This Tropers has been drinking coffee almost all her life (Of course, in a very milked down version when she was little). She's addicted to caffeine, but she can go a day or two without having any form of it. Of course, when she makes coffee she makes it so strong that the neighbors wake up. She's also had to put up with snarky comments from her father (See: "Is the spoon supposed to stand up?") on the strength of the coffee. During breaks and on weekends, she is able to go without anything to wake her up, but during school she has to have some from of sugar or caffeine or she sleeps through her morning classes. * [[ShadowoftheSun This Troper]] used to be addicted to caffeine until he stopped drinking soft drink as much for weight loss. He despises coffee and tea and now drinks only one can of Pepsi a day but, back in his prime, he could down 3 energy drinks in five minutes without any ill effects. * For [[PurplePantherGirl This Troper]] it's not coffee or caffine but Twix. If I do not have a Twix every morning... Zombiefied. * This troper doesn't drink coffee, but has a lemonade intake that must be seen to be believed. * [[AuntZelda This troper]] treats orange juice the way most people treat coffee. She [+ NEEDS IT+ ] to speak coherently at all in the morning (and sometimes chugs it it she gets it late) and if she doesn't get it at all, the rest of the day is a struggle. Many of her friends have compared this behavior to their coffee addictions. * [[{{Cybele}} This one here]] doesn't drink coffee, thinks the taste is pretty ick. So for me it's soda. LOTS AND LOTS OF SODA. Coca-Cola preferably. ** [[{{Pancho}} This troper]] also drinks a lot of soda (she considers it her equivalent to coffee, considering the amounts she chugs down...), but coffee isn't her style. However, if she needs a rude wake-up call, cold Cuban coffee always does the trick. At the cost of it being VERY bitter... * [[MonsterDog This troper]] had a heart attack at thirty (IGotBetter). His cardiologist attributed the cause to "enough caffeine to kill an African elephant." Life has been pretty sad since. * If not requesting some caffeine from my mom and her damn good

espresso, I run on Pepsi. Lots of it...I sleep at 2 AM at the earliest. ._. Not healthy in the least. * Not being able to stomach the taste of coffee, [[{{Adekis}} this troper]] has, on the occaision that I require caffeine, mixed diet cola (usually Coke Zero) with diet Mountain Dew. The end result is known as "Sex". I heard about it from a friend, and I personally really like it. Note that "diet" is not necesarry for this, I just have diabetes. ** This troper is also diabetic and finds himself going through sugarfree Koolaid and Crystal Light like it's nobody's business. My current addiction is Oceanspray Sugarfree Cran-Grape juice. I have a permanent koolaid mustache from it. * [[{{Ziddy}} This troper]] hates coffee, but developed a nice, heavy resistance to caffeine thanks to homebrew "energy drinks" to function in early morning speech competitions. The recipe basically came down to stirring a cup of sugar into one can of Pepsi. After downing three of those in an hour, [[HilarityEnsues hilarity always ensued.]] ** [[{{Bluemage}} I]] had to check your contributor link to make sure you weren't me. No speech competitions, and my version was made with Pixy Stix in Mountain Dew, but that's about right. First time I had it (20 oz. Dew + ~15 Stix), I got my first sugar rush/caffeine buzz ever. The second time was for my AP US History test- a 1 liter Dew with three giant Stix, chugged. I got the shakes, nearly threw up... and went on to get a 5 on the test. Since then, I've been immune, with two exceptions. First, sugar wakes me up faster (instantly, instead of in about 10 minutes). Second, I can't have caffeine for an hour before I go to sleep, or I won't. I just lay there, exhausted, but unable to slow my thoughts down enough to fall unconscious. I treat Dew, Diet Coke, and iced tea the same way- like water. * This troper never had any need for caffeine, although it never works when he would potentially need it, and he generally dislikes coffee in any form. (Go to local hipster coffee shop, get a smoothie, have all the hipsters scoff at him.) * [[GalenDev This Troper]] used to be a bona fide caffeine addict. At the height of his addiction, he would drink a pot and a half of coffee per day, plus various other caffeinated beverages (Green Tea and CocaCola were the norm). Then one day he quit. He went through full drug withdrawal symptoms. It wasn't pretty. But he managed to kick it! Now he'll have one cup of coffee every two weeks or so, but never more, and caffeinated soda is right out. He's never been more alert. * This troper's high school drama program has declared its official drink to be coffee. As far as she can see, most students walk into school every morning with a cup of coffee (she has a thermos), and we hold improv performances advertised for all-you-can-drink Starbucks coffee. The coffee need is worst on tech weeks or performance nights, because after a straight week of staying at school until at least nine at night, the actors and techies are all exhausted. Coffee is nearly worshiped these weeks. She also tells each new student to start drinking coffee if they don't yet. * Everyone remember Surge? That carbonated drink that had obscene ammounts of caffeine, even more than Red Bull? This troper had had about three half-liter bottles of Surge in the space of a week back in

first grade (or sometime thereabouts). He's been addicted to caffeine ever since. * This troper finds coffee and caffinated beverages delicious, but rarely ever drinks them. Orange juice and chocolate milk are far superior. * This troper comes from an entire family of caffiends. Her father drinks so much coffee he's turned it into a comic shtick at work; her mother, who grew up abstaining, developed the habit after marrying; this troper herself puts two tablespoons of instant (1 teaspoon=1 cup=70mg) in her morning Slim-Fast. Now her adolescent brother thinks caffeine addiction is something to ''aspire'' to, and cadges Red Bull and Frappuccinos whenever he can in hopes of building up his tolerance. Nobody, though, beats her uncle's Norwegian college roommate, who would supposedly drink an entire ten-cup pot before breakfast. * Strange example with this Troper. I literally can't have coffee (pseudo-allergic due to not being old enough; IOW, since I'm only a teen, coffee is toxic to me), yet I need soda on a semi-daily basis. Pepsi and Mountain Dew are my favorites, though unlike some other examples on this page, I just have the soda straight. Adding extra sugar would probably make me barf (and if I did it at college, I'd likely be so hyper, Sensei would be a bit nervous). But one exception to this: I can't drink ''diet'' soda. No sugar = '''''no flavor''''' in my opinion. I'm still shocked that other teens at the college are able to drink coffee, as it's supposed to be toxic to ''anyone'' under the age of 18. I can't even be in prolonged proximity to coffee, as the smell has an effect similar to NauseaFuel, minus the [[BrainBleach Bleeprin]]. Not sure if I'll drink it when I'm physically old enough, but in the meantime, I'll stick to soda. Oh, and the occassional can (yes, a can) of green tea. ** Coffee is toxic to teenagers? This troper's been drinking it regularly since the age of 15 or 16, with no noticeable ill effects unless she has too much. My Google-fu isn't turning up anything on the subject of age-based coffee intolerance, but I'd be interested to read more about this if anyone has a link. ** According to TheOtherWiki, that's more UrbanLegend. Caffeine (coffee) legendarily would affect growth, but no studies have confirmed this at all. I think that was started by someone who was trying to keep their children from developing a caffeine addiction. * This troper used to get in trouble with her parents for smuggling the French press into her bedroom late at night. Now her coffee consumption is a comparatively modest three mugs per day with none in the evening, but coffee is still her top priority when she wakes up. In a twist that will no doubt make other contributors to this page blanch, she prefers instant to ground. * This troper pretty much gave up on Coffee due to costs. He needs a Venti Mocha with six(!!!) shots of expresso to get meaningful kick. At that point it's really just a large glass of expresso with coco powder in it. * This troper doesn't really like the taste of coffee particularly so she drinks mochas (coffee mixed with hot chocolate, the hot chocolate cuts the bitterness down enough for her to enjoy the drink. Even so

she really only drinks the stuff for the caffiene and doesn't understand the point of decaf coffee. And she only drinks a single cup when she has morning classes since otherwise she wouldn't be able to pay proper attention to school in the morning due to taking quite a while to reach proper levels of functionality. * All the males in my family practically live off of caffiene (mostly coffee). * While this troper isn't nearly the caff-fiend he used to be, he did invent a drink he called Neapolitan Wirewater back in his more caffeine-guzzling days. The recipe is this: Brew a pot of extra-strong coffee using caffeinated water. Brew espresso-style coffee using this coffee. Add this to Jolt Cola. The result is enough to cause one to ping off the walls like a ferret on methamphetamine. He never did the math, but one of his cow-orkers at the time estimated this stuff had on the order of 750mg of caffeine in a 0.5L bottle. * 8:00 am classes 4 times a week for three semesters straight and not a drop of coffee or grain of sugar the whole time. Wow, I'm pretty amazing. Except, when you have 8:00 classes 4 times a week you begin to wonder what the point of living is. * This troper has a soda addiction. She's a lot better with it but she still perks up quicker with some caffeine. * [[Tropers/SabreEdge This troper]] isn't addicted to coffee ''per se'' (only a cup on the weekends normally), but the rigors of high school junior year and its blizzard of AP classes forced me to craft a solution: very strong black coffee, run through the machine ''twice''. The resultant mixture has, at its strongest, made my hands tremble after I drank it. I dubbed it "rocket fuel", reserved it strictly for emergency use, and credit it with keeping me alive and sane through that year. Even my former AP English teacher, himself an acknowledged coffee addict, called it weird. ** Additionally, my Chinese ethnicity meant that I was introduced to tea early on, sans milk or sugar (green tea, hurray). It doesn't seem to affect me, as I routinely have a cup before bedtime, but in High School I developed the habit of bringing a thermos of it to school, where it proves most helpful right after lunch, which is, appropriately, Mandarin class. ** I heard of someone doing that with coffee (running it through the machine twice.) Bear in mind that ''soldiers'' told this guy that he makes terrible coffee to begin with; when he double-brewed his infamous coffee for an all-nighter, he and his classmates weren't quite right in the head for close to a ''week!'' * Averted hard here. This troper, being Mormon, has never even tasted coffee or tea and drinks caffeinated soda VERY sparingly (one every six months or so, but that's just because I don't like soda very much). During high school, I got up at 5:30 every morning and went throughout my day as usual, going to bed at about 10:30 [[{{Badass}} without anything more powerful than a small square of chocolate crossing my lips.]] * [[{{Miso}} My]] entire ''family'' is this trope, me included. I drink two caffeinated sodas a day, my mother drinks two or more cups of (milk-and-sugar heavy) coffee a day, and my dad HAS to have a cup of coffee when he wakes up. On another amusing note, my guitar tutor

always has a ''massive'' cup full of Pepsi with him. I've seen two or more empty 16-oz (or so) bottles of Pepsi in there. How he stays so laid back and calm with all his caffeine I have no idea. * {{MonkeyPhysics}} can't actually remember the last time he went a day without caffeine. It's got to the stage where the most eloquent thing to come out of his mouth pre-caffeination is "mngrfl". * Strangely, caffeine has no effect at all for [[{{FourtyTwoHz}} this troper]]. * Aversion: This tropper is rather embarassed to be the eldest son on my Dad's side, all avid Black Coffee drinkers, who ''doesn't'' like it. I blame my SweetTooth, but I'd probably go nuts without my beloved [[DrinkOrder Country-Time Pink Lemonade...]] * [[{{Prioris}} This troper]] managed to make herself more popular than the class home-brewer in nursing school. The secret? Homeroasting coffee. * At my first science-fiction convention, This Troper literally watched a very hung over fellow in more silver lame than an Elvis impersonator walk straight to the coffee pot, check if the industrialsized pot was full, and proceed to worship it like a heathen idol. Funniest. Thing. Ever. * This editor is addicted not to coffee, but to diet coke. Caffeinefree diet coke is my BerserkButton. * Not a coffee person, but this troper absolutely loves tea, coke, and energy drinks. Twenty cups of tea a day, a bottle of coke every two days and a energy drink a week (unless it's an examination week, in which case it's five energy drinks for five days). However, this troper has quite the caffeine tolerance and so needs at least a large can of Mother to get buzzed. * [[NeoCrimson This troper]] loves coffee, tea, and to lesser extent coke, but purely for the taste. In fact caffeine is the reason why he doesn't drink more of it lest it ruins his delicate sleep pattern. He also despises energy drinks because they taste horrible and make him jittery and hot, rather than energized. * This troper drinks coffee as much for taste as for the caffeine, preferring it to every other form of caffeinated beverage. His fondness for strong black coffee has becoming a running joke to those who know him. * Subversion (I guess): This troper [[TrademarkFavoriteFood loves his iced tea]], but as far as he can tell, the caffiene doesn't do a damn thing. It's purely for the taste. * Aversion here: I have almost no tolerance for caffeine. I drank sodas when I was in college, though my preference was for Sprite ''the one non-caffeinated soft drink available at the cafeteria.'' About seven years ago, I got seriously wired from only three cans of Dr. Pepper, and more recently even ONE 12-oz can of cola is enough to leave me buzzing. Anytime I've had coffee I either add so much milk/cream as to almost make it into a different beverage, take a really small cup, or some combination of the above.\\ My brother, however, plays this one pretty straight: he used to go through about two two-liter bottles of Coke per day. At one time he was slugging down coffee in the morning, Coke in the afternoon, and taking ''caffeine pills!'' He's [[ItGotBetter gotten better]] about it

over the years. * [[{{MiraShio}} Mira-chan]] and her mom avert this trope entirely. For us, caffeine doesn't do a damn thing. [[WhoseLineIsItAnyway Not a daaaamn thing]]. * ShadowOfTheSun gave up caffeine to be an alcoholic instead. * this troper is an admitted caffeine addict. she goes without it on days she has no plans, but on days she has work or plans to do anything she NEEDS her caffeine. she does everything, but is trying to keep consumption of carbonated beverages in general down. she's used various energy shots (and is really liking redline 7 hour energy, it's cheaper than the 5 hour shots and you only need half a bottle), coffee, tea, yerba matte, caffeinated mints, caffeinated gum, caffeinated gummies, caffeinated hard candy, and she's probably forgetting something. she especially loves Java Monster, tho. but she also has a very good reason for caffeinating herself to get by, she developed chronic fatigue syndrome at age 6 and now at age 30 also has been diagnosed for fibromylagia as well and several other conditions. she has plenty of medications she can take to manage her pain levels, but no effective prescription medications to deal with her extreme fatigue levels. to compensate for her fatigue she use to drink the equivalent of 4 pots of coffee a day, but has since cut down to no more than two doses of caffeine per day (except on really bad days when she has to work when she slips in an extra half dose). * This troper's aunt drinks so much coffee that Grandmom almost bought her a shirt with the words "Without coffee, I have no personality" on the front. She only refrained from buying it because the color was too ugly. * This troper's house has been without coffee for over a week. A few days ago, she found a nearly-empty bottle of Kahlua. It was empty two minutes later. She didn't even want any alcohol, but... * This troper cannot run without her morning tea. She refuses to drink coffee unless it is mixed with large quantities of tastier things (read: sugar). * [[JET73L This Troper]] MustHaveCaffeine ''to offset the effects of sugar''. The troper loves coffee, but caffeine just causes calmness, mellowness, or in severe cases drowsiness, but a sugar high (such as from candy or decaffeinated sodas) can jump-start a run of CaffeineBulletTime. Said troper drinks [[GiganticGulp large]], noncreamer ice coffees, has one of those novelty [[WinnieThePooh Tigger]] mugs that could hold at ''least'' a regular bottle of soda, and drank from the pot itself several times (and then refilling it) when it had cooled enough for direct lip-skin contact by the time the troper got to it. If not for the [[BrokeEpisode Broke Arc]], a new (i.e., working) coffee/espressomaker would practically be running all day, every day. * This male under-grad needs coffee to start the day. Not only due to the fact that I'm a college student, but because I'm awake and at work before the Sun gets its lazy ass up. I just hope I can get stronger stuff when I get to grad school (from what I've heard you can't get a psychology degree without potentially lethal amounts of caffeine in your blood at all times). * This troper was wondering why she was getting headaches in the

morning all of a sudden. Then she noticed they go away after a cup of tea. She didn't even know physical dependence on ''tea'' instead of coffee was possible. * This troper loves coke zero, coffee and red bull. None of which gets in the way of his booze drinking! * This troper drinks about 2 mugs (not cups, mugs) of strong coffee or tea a day. Ironically, she also has a crippling phobia of addiction (rather, a fear of dependence on anything) so has several times cut off her caffeine supply for a few days just to make sure she's not psychologically addicted. However, doing so gives her a headache but she is easily able to function without the effects of caffeine. Mainly she drinks it for the concentrating effect it has on her. * This troper becomes this later in the workweek, because he is NotAMorningPerson and his job requires him to get up at 6 am. With an inability to fall asleep before 11 pm, he must make up for the sleep deprivation with coffee. Sleep debt and caffeine tolerance build up during the week, so he avoids coffee on the weekends to drain the tolerance off (so the caffeine will actually work the next week.) Beats full-blown caffeine addiction. * This troper's addiction began at the age of twelve during a particularly grueling community theatre production. It's gotten to the point where, at fifteen, she needs a double espresso every morning to keep her from killing someone, having a nervous breakdown, or vibrating on the spot. ** On a somewhat related note, does anyone know if caffeine actually stunts your growth? I've never been able to find conclusive evidence on the topic. *** This Troper is 6' 3" tall (190.5 cm for the rest of the world) and absolutely adores the mix of coffee and Mountain Dew his friend makes, [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin Mountain Coffee]]. It does not help that the drama department has a coffee pot ''specifically'' for [[strike:students]] [[StageNames thespians]]. * How this college-attending troper makes it through midterms every semester: cup of coffee, extra sugar at night, cup of coffee in the morning, super-energy drink at school, three-hour nap afterwards, repeat for a week. She's actually started vibrating in her seat a few times because of it, though. [[BeyondTheImpossible And one time she actually added instant-coffee crystals]] ''[[BeyondTheImpossible to]]'' [[BeyondTheImpossible a cup of freshly-brewed coffee.]] * Averted with this anonymous European troper. I don't drink coffee. Or any warm beverages. For some reason, I start feeling very sleepy after drinking something warm. For staying awake, I have a considerable amount of Heroic Willpower to draw upon. * Tropers/TheMysteriousTroper had long preferred "[[PulpFiction Wolf]] Coffee" (mild blends with "lotsa cream and lotsa sugar") with no desire to learn about any fancy, rarefied ideas from Europe... until they discovered the Cafe Mocha. Hot Chocolate with distilled essence of coffee? Yes, please. * [[{{Joerc45}} This troper,]] [[ThisIsSPARTA NEEDS.]] [[LargeHam HIS.]] CAFFEINE! Preferably 3 cups per day. ^_^ * Not as extreme as the other examples above (especially not the example above), but I tend to be impossible to get a conversation out

of if I haven't had a cup of tea with my breakfast (4 Wheatabix is typical, but considering cutting down a bit). Luckily (for everyone else), I become more sensible (read: understandable) after 9AM (which, by a strange coincidence, is the time school starts where I live). I will occationally drink coffee, but I need so much sugar in it that the point is kind of defeated (and I need milk in it as well). ** Forgot to add: I've also recently developed a bit of an addiction to sugar. Case of point, try drinking 4 litres of Vimto (not diet) in 2 hours without being hyper. I managed it...just (let's just say that people wondered there was vodka in it, as I far more noisy than usual. Since I was in a show on that night, though, it was worth it). This was followed, four days later, with 3 litres of coke (again, not diet), drunk in 2 hours. Unlike the previous time, I was completely fine. Maybe I have guts made of steel...or, failing that, enough insulin in my body to kill a blue whale. * The joke about Seattle is that we have an espresso cart on every corner. The truth is that, in a commercial area, we have two or three ''per block.'' Justified trope in that it is gray, rainy, and cold nine months out of the year...and during parts of the other three months. ** We're not called the coffee capital of the world for nothing... [[DontExplainTheJoke since we thrive off of it.]] ** Third Seattle-area troper confirming this. In my small town, we have four Starbucks plus three small drive-in espresso stands. I've been trying for years not to get addicted, but calculus class has finally killed my resistance. * In college, [[Tropers/DragonHawk this troper]] drank Mountain Dew like water. Me and a friend took to calling it "Nectar of the Gods". (Who you calling an addict?) * [[{{Tropers/Sharysa}} This troper]] adores the taste and smell of coffee and always has a cup every morning. While she isn't as insanely addicted or immune to caffeine as some of the other tropers, she can distinguish the various ''brands'' of coffee by their taste after drinking it since sophomore year in high school. [=McDonalds=]' (hot) coffee is obscenely bitter unless she puts tons of cream and sugar in it (which then ruins the taste for her). Starbucks coffee has a general "roasted" flavor and while unremarkable, is not half so bad as people say it is. Instant coffee tastes like water with caffeine pills mixed in. Coffee that's been freshly-roasted and ground up (or at least packaged in a vaccuum-tight container after grinding) tastes like [[TastesLikeFeet a breezy summer's day at the park.]] * Having heard horror stories about addiction, I've decided it's a particularly bad idea to get addicted to any caffeinated substance... couple that with the fact that I don't like coffee or tea (and for a brit that's unusual to say the least) and am not particularly keen on cola either (it's a case of Diet Coke ''if I have to'', or once in a while), and the only caffeinated beverage I partake in is Irn-Bru, which is a hideously unhealthy Scottish sugar hit and is bad for you for other reasons... Essentially I limit myself to one a week. Being able to be awake without drugs is a good thing; now to sort out the irregular sleeping habits... [{{Tropers/Finlay}}] * This trope's band director, to the point that the students use it as

mocking fodder. We've decided that the coffee is why Mr. Lewis is so short, and this is used to our advantage. A boy this troper has known since she was very small put Lewis' coffee on a shelf... just out of his reach, just to see what would happen. Lewis stood on a table to get it back. He also has an addiction to gummi bears, which comes into play as a Freethrow distraction at basketball games that goes as such: "coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee- GUMMI BEARS!". It is named after our director, naturally (he was flattered and amused by this). Similarly, the band runs on energy drinks, coffee, and soda at football games. We're actually told to do so by the aforementioned director, since the more spirit we have (read: the more loud and obnoxious we are), the better our funding. In addition, the only "Joe" this troper likes is her friend, since she much prefers tea... with lots of sugar. This troper's friend prefers Mountain Dew, and after a while, doesn't shut up and more or less acts like she's high. * Averted with this troper, who hates tea and coffee with a passion. Played very straight with her mother, who loves it and is not fully functional 'til she's drunk some coffee. * [[Tropers/NotATerrorist This Troper]] drinks caffeinated drinks because they make him shiver. He enjoys it. * This troper has a natural sleep cycle of 2am-10am. This troper has a job that necessitates a wakeup at 5am. This troper's normal brew is described in the KlatchianCoffee troper tales--and that's just to start. Some weeks, if he hasn't had time to sleep in and endure a caffeine purge and the associated hangover to reset his tolerance, this troper has been known to 'top off' with a number of red-eyes (coffee with one or more shots of espresso) from the nearby Starbucks-and still finds it too weak. ** Additionally, this troper's then-girlfriend (now-fiancee) did not like coffee until said troper introduced her to the Ethiopian Harrar varietal. Now she also requires coffee. * [[Tropers/ThirtyTwoFootsteps This troper]] spent six months learning how to brew coffee in such a fashion that even those who claim to hate the taste of coffee love it. Which is odd, considering he's perfectly fine just munching on the unground beans. But then again, a bad cup of coffee is like a GroinAttack in your stomach, a mediocre cup of coffee is a bitter concoction to get you through the day, but a well made cup is like a high-five from God. * [[Troper/Sandangel This Troper]] used to be a coffee addict in high school, though diluted a bit...sort of (her mother makes/drinks her coffee European-style, so Turkish ground, then 3-4 scoops in 1 1/2 cups water, resulting in one hellova strong kick; this troper would take 1/4 cup, then add milk and Nesquik to drown out the taste). Any fluctuations in amount resulted in incredibly painful migraines, so she weaned herself off, sticking just to the hot chocolate for the most part. Then she discovered the joy of drinking tea at a part-time job, and since then, a cup of caffeinated tea (black, green, white, does not matter, TEA!!!) in the morning, or else you're talking to a zombie. Decaffeinated tea is her afternoon to evening hot drink of choice, but either way, gives us the tea, and no one get hurt. * Unless it's iced, this troper refuses to drink coffee. Instead, I drink tea and sodas and, on occasion, a certain energy drink that

begins with "M" and ends with "onster". Granted, the only reason why I drink Monster is because I love the taste, but heaven help you if I forgo common sense and buy myself a BFC. * [[{{Tropers/smittykins}} This troper]] is firmly in the "Coffee smells great but tastes terrible" camp. Diet Pepsi, however, is her life's blood. * I want to remind you tropers: Isn't caffeine basically a stimulant, aka the same drug as ''cocaine and meth''? So that's why we all universally love it. * This troper prefers tea or energy drinks when she needs a caffine fix, but her group of friends were legenday for their adiction to coffee, as well as their lack of sleep, to the point it made it into the roast the junior class does of the senior class. -> Junior as friend #1: Here's your coffee Friend #2 -> Junior as friend #2: Ah [=WaWa=] Nectar of the Gods! Thank yo- wait a minute! this is the 12 oz. I need the 24 oz. FAIL! * This tropette's dad gets his caffine from Pepsi. HE [[ThisIsSparta HAS. TO. HAVE. PEPSI.]] Sometimes he'll run into a gas station and by a 1L bottle when he already has a 1L bottle UNOPENED in his car. I used to joke that whenever he bought Pepsi when he had an unfinished bottle, a polar bear died, or said that it was amazing how the people at the plasma donating place (dad donated plasma for extra money, and I can't remember the name of the place) didn't find Pepsi in place of blood. Did I mention that he'll have Pepsi for breakfast. Not with, FOR. * I don't need coffee very much. Usually when at work, I'll have a double choc-expresso with milk at lunch time. If I've stayed up too late I might have a single choc-expresso at morning tea. If I'm having any before I start or in the afternoon then I probably didn't sleep. * This troper is thirteen, and she already needs a cup of coffee each day. If she doesn't have coffee, she manages to sleep through most of her classes and turns into a raging monster. Usually she has only half a cup per day, but on trips she gets as many as her dad does, so five or six cups of coffee aren't uncommon. * This troper drinks Coke Zero almost exclusively at my mom's. So when I go to my dad's, I go through withdrawal. It's worth it though. * This troper has been told by her doctor to give up caffeine because it's an acid reflux trigger. Since said troper is in college, majoring in biology, she [[{{Understatement}} has not had an easy time of it]]. Lack of caffeine makes her irritable and tired and headachy. Which just plain sucks anyway, but especially with school. * This Troper needs at least two cups of coffee in the morning, or she falls asleep during history, or biology. She also has around two to three cups when she gets home from school. She has horrible headaches when she doesn't have her coffee. The excuse is that she's almost in college...and she's getting ready for the future! * An inversion for This Troper: Too much Caffeine tires me out to sleep. ** This troper does not get tired per se, but caffeine keeps my mind from racing, which helps me fall asleep. On the other hand, I need coffee to wake up in the morning. Not for the caffeine, but the taste. Decaf wakes me up just as effectively as the regular brew.

* This troper's younger brother was, in elementary school, dependent on hot chocolate to operate in the morning. Cola, tea, and I think we even gave him some coffee once, had no effect. Only Swiss Miss. * One of [[{{Jinjoman}} Jinjoman]]'s friends drinks a cup or two of coffee a day, and is very defensive of it. Try to steal the [[BuffySpeak thing of coffee]] he carries around and he'll rip your arm off. * Caffeine - be it chocolate, coffee, Coca-Cola, any soda but Monster, really - keeps me relaxed and awake: I need it to stay alive. If I overdo it I start literally bouncing off the walls. And to anyone who likes coffee and Coke: MIX THEM TOGETHER IN EQUAL PARTS. Whever I have it, I SWEAR I see the manifestation of God, if a god truly exists. * When this troper was in her final exams phase in school she went on... about... *counts* twenty cups of high-school-cafeteria-coffeewending-machine-coffee. My usual amout back then was 10 cups. Now, six years later I'm at university and have the healthy amount of 6 cups home brewed stuff per day (yes, that ''IS'' healthy! Since it makes me work! It is! It IS IT TOTALLY IS...) - well, as long as there is no semester-ends-exams-phase or I have to hand in a paper... in latter case expect me to have 20 cups again, spending several weeks without any sleep at all. * Having drunk his first coffee at the age of 5 and drinking coffee regularly since the age of 8 or 9 (which is 12 years ago), it's safe to say that This Troper MustHaveCaffeine. * This troper is trying to find some kind of powerful energy drink, because caffeine is great, but not in the quantities she needs it. Suggestions? ---Feeling tired? Grab a nice cup of joe back at MustHaveCaffeine! ----

MustHaveNicotine * This troper seems to end up resorting to lighting his cigarettes on the burner in the kitchen more often than he'd like. Lighters are just so tiny. So easily misplaced. ** This troper has done that. It's an electric glass stove, though. It takes a while. * This troper was, at one point in his life, physically addicted to nicotine ''without'' being psychologically addicted (and thus, without feeling cravings). He found it rather amusing that sometimes, if he left home in a hurry, he'd later realize he MustHaveNicotine because he simply ''forgot'' to smoke. ** Oh, and he's since quit entirely. You know, in case you were wondering. ** This Troper is the inverse; said Troper had a two-week hospital visit and wasn't bothered at all by nicotine withdrawal, being tough as nails. That and because he also drinks over a gallon of coffee a day and was too busy being miserable about ''that'' to care (they wouldn't let him have any there). [[WhatAnIdiot Still smokes]], currently; soon as he got out he picked up the habit again. Can eat

nails, but mentally, he gets into habits as easily as it is hard to break them. * [[MisterAlways This one here]] is a very long sleeper (ten hours are enough, thank you). On school days, he has to get up at 8 (he catches the bus at about 8:10 - go figure). If he does NOT smoke a cigarette in the morning, he won't be worth shit for the first two hours of classes. He's also a shameless fag-bummer when his pack runs dry (or when he simply doesn't have the money to buy cigs). ** Exceptions are made for Pall Malls (fuck ''off''!), and in times of need, he has resorted to menthol cigarettes. [[TakeThat Now that's addiction.]] ** This troper has the same problem, and being a non-menthol guy bumming cigarettes in a new york community college he sometimes fantasizes about a world where the person who invented newports died in a fiery car crash. ** OP here. I'm wearing a nicotine patch as I write this. I am heavily averting this trope right now. This thing is blasting heavy doses of feel-good stuff directly into my bloodstream...and by God, ''it itches''.

MyBelovedSmother * [[ThisTroper This troper's]] mother. MY. GOD. As if being a Smother wasn't bad enough, she also places having a perfect image and being the best above someone's emotional well-being, to the point where she turns a blind eye to anyone who's depressed or troubled. It's gotten to the point where this troper no longer loves her and simply keeps up the facade of even giving a single shit about her to keep peace in the family. Additionally, whenever a Smother-type character appears in this troper's writing, it's at least VERY MUCH based off of her. ** ...*Hugs*? ** There's no law requiring you to stay on speaking terms with an abusive mother. [[MonsterDog This troper]] cut off all contact with his Smother, to the great benefit of his mental health. *** Yes, but this troper (the original poster) is still below the age of majority. Also, my father is still married to her and alive. Given that he is awesome and still a major part of my life, and that I have two pets living with my Smother, their not being dead (my father is getting there, and my dogs are quite old) is the only thing keeping me bound to her. * Also, ThisTroper's. With a heaping helping of DoesNotLikeMen for good measure. You can imagine how that goes when her only so-called "daughter" is a [[{{Transsexual}} transguy]]]...in addition to giving his brother hell... * This troper's mother is part this and part lethal chef. She's' also a Tsundere. * This troper's mother fits pretty well in this category, considering that this troper ''never'' gets to go out with her friends or anywhere that her mother deems as 'unsafe'. She claims that this troper will be able to go out more when they move out of this neighborhood, but after 5 or 6 years of hearing this over and over, this troper's given up hope.

** Ditto here. This troper ''will never be allowed to take a bus by himself in his life''. Apparently, a big, fat, 19-year-old guy is a prime target for child abductors unless he has one of his 50-year-old parents with him. She'd also run across the country while bleeding to death to give him a parka in the middle of July "just in case it gets cold". She's a Grade Nazi (Then again she is a teacher). She's always on his case about losing weight (so is his dad), and everything is the fault of "those games". Top it off with a small sprinkle of "Everything ever touched by a stranger ever has AIDS." And of course, this is the ''minimum'' requirement to being a good parent and loving your child. Everyone else is a bad parent for actually taking some time for themselves once in a while instead of obsessively making sure nothing the slightest bit negative ever happens to their child. After all, if you kid dies, how is he supposed to get good grades and become a doctor or an engineer or Jesus or some other acceptable career? First the kid gets a 60 on his math test, and then he's out smoking, drinking, doing drugs, having sex, the works. All 'cause the parents went to go take a shit instead of helping their 30-year-old cross the street safely. I'm sure there's more, but I can't think of anything. Know what the funny part is, though? [[EverybodyLovesRaymond Go on. Guess her name...]] *** Wait, just thought of one more. On several occasions, she has had bizarre and surreal nightmares of bad things happening to me that she thinks are premonitions. *** Okay, your mother officially needs psychological help. **** Well, maybe I'm exaggerating [[{{Understatement}} a little]] in my annoyed state. Most of her behavior can be blamed on YouCanPanicNow. The Grade Nazi-ing is probably her trying to avoid TheCobblersChildrenHaveNoShoes, since she is a teacher (of second grade, but a teacher nonetheless). ** My mother has the same issue. Recently, I was invited to hang out with some friends from campus. Her reaction when she found this out? She demanded that I ''text her every hour on the hour'' to let her know that I was safe, and then, when that wasn't enough, got my younger brother to ''rig my phone so I could be tracked anywhere ever.'' This isn't parenting, it's borderline STALKING! And I'm almost 23... She also told me to "not drink anything I'm given [by them]," despite the fact that this was going to be on a Monday morning. I don't know whether to be depressed or relieved that my friends ultimately had to cancel our plans. *** I believe you can get around the tracking device by taking out the battery when you want privacy. Or just, you know, get a new phone. You're old enough. But seriously, do something, that's creepy. * This troper's mother has a number of habits: telling her when to get her hair cut, not to go out so late, you should go to bed!, is your homework done? This troper is 22. The mother also has a distressing tendency to glom onto her while she (the troper) is eating dinner. It's reached the point where even the troper's father says "For god's sake, stop doing that." ** Update: the troper is now 24. Every time she visits home (she lives in a city less than two hours' travel away from her parents), her mother reminds her that any time she finds life out there too

difficult, she can always move back. The fact that the troper is an ESL teacher and lives in a place where 50% of the population do not speak English as a first language - while her hometown is 90% angloCanadian - just makes this suggestion even more absurd. * My mom definitely suffers from this. Though, to be fair, she did grow up in a BigScrewedUpFamily, with her pretty much being the neglected (borderline hated) middle child, and even admitted that it was ok if I thought she was a bit nutty. But, damn, she goes crazy with the mothering. Half the time she won't let me cut up apples or other such foods because she thinks I'll hurt myself. She also tells me when to burner on the stove is hot, when I've obviously seen it was being cooked on. If I get a bad grade on a test, I have to do over the test so I understand what I did wrong. I hate bringing friends around her, because about 98% of the time I have, a month later, the end up not being my friend anymore. If I go out, I usually have to call often to let her know where I am/doing. And I absolutely ''cannot'' ignore her phone calls. ** On a slightly different note, I actually find this funny that TV/movies/what-have-you usually portray smothers as doing this only to their sons rather than their daughters. There seems to be about the same (if not more) amount of girls who end up suffering from their mothers in real life. * This troper's Grandma is like this, although she has a very good excuse: she has a very, ''very'' bad memory, meaning that while her advice is good, it's either: ** Totally out of place: she constantly gets me (20 years old) confused with my cousins (13 and 6), and as such freaks out any time I try to leave their house to get food, or watch a violent movie, or whatever. ** She Forgets that she gave advice, or that we already answered her questions. Asking someone if they want a piece of pie is fine. Asking them if they want pie every five minutes for an hour is rather annoying. Fortunately, my (Extremely patient) grandpa is usually able to contain her smothering. *** Pie every five minutes? What could possibly go wrong! **** Because it's not always pie (it's usually vegetables), if you say no she'll be depressed for the rest of the day, and literally ''every five minutes for hours on end'' (makes getting anything useful done nigh impossible). Fortunately, there's an out: accept the first food item, but don't eat it. Every time she comes over with food she'll see that I have something and leave me alone. *** That's not a Grandsmother, that's ''sad!'' **** Update: She's gotten quite a bit better recently due to some new medication. She's still quite forgetful, but it's nowhere near as bad. * My beloved Smother thinks it's not a good idea to spend hours in the desert with my GF. I think she's crazy. I think with my brain. It might be risky if I didn't have Attention Deficit Ooh Shiny on the side. * My gran gets like that sometimes... what is it with grandmothers and feeding people? Also, before I leave to get the bus, she asks me if I've gone to the bathroom this morning. Aaargh! I'm 18, I can regulate my own toilet routines thank you very much!

* My mother was like this as well. Calling up teachers for every one of my classes, making sure to meet and evaluate each and every one of my friends, looking through my laptop while I was asleep every night for god knows how long, reading all my notebooks that I kept in my backpack, and making sure that my computer was always, always set up within eyesight wherever she was. This was justified by her as making sure I stayed on the right path and got into a good school. The worst, however, was that on two separate occasions, she hired my cousins in school to insert themselves into my social circle for the sole purpose of keeping an eye on me and reporting my school activities. All of this was met with depression on my part, and severely inhibited my school activites, making her push me even more. When it was at it's worst, I was failing all of my classes from being smothered too much. I ended up running away, living on the street for about a week while still going to school, finding a new place to live with some other people for awhile, picking up my grades without anyone's help, and getting into an exclusive private art school on my own without her help. All of this was to show that I do NOT need her in my life anymore, and we finally made up when she realized I could look after myself. * This troper dated a guy with a mom like this. But here's the thing: this troper is gay, and the ex in question wasn't out to his parents at the time. We only dated for a month, but visiting him at his parents' was ''extremely'' awkward. * [[strike: Up until a year ago, [[{{Crion87}} this troper]]'s mother seemed to fit the bill]]. She's now worse than ever. There was for a period of time (while he was in a long-distance relationship with someone from a few towns away [[{{CrouchingSupportHiddenBatshit}} who turned out to be a borderline nutter anyway]]) is a slight aversion of the trope - some of the time. However, it did save his neck concerning [[{{OlderThanTheyLook}} a]] [[{{HookerWithAHeartOfGold}} certain]] [[{{TheFundamentalist}} ex-girlfriend]]; nonetheless, my mother's being MyBelovedSmother seems to have intensified since [[{{Tropers/Crion87}} this troper]] moved back to the town where his parents lived (in a residence [[{{Tropers/Crion87}} this troper]] is renting, but anyway...) out of red-tape issues with trying to go somewhere else. All this makes [[{{Tropers/Crion87}} this troper]] wish that someday he would catch the eye of [[{{NorseByNorsewest}} some Northern European woman]] or such ''[[{{ScrewThisImOuttaHere}} who could get him out of]] [[{{LandDownunder}} the Commonwealth of Australia altogether]] [[{{UpToEleven}} just to put the whole thing to rest]]'' '''without''' ''trying to become a SelfMadeOrphan''... * This troper's mother was somewhat like this, though nowhere near as bad as what most people here seem to have had. Needless to say it stopped with college, which makes this troper wonder how your parents manage this when you're hundreds/thousands of miles away. * My Mum is like this at times. It even goes to the point where I'm not allowed to wear what I want... As in, I'm not allowed to wear a) skirts/shorts/t-shirts (even on a hot day) and b) any black. This is pretty tame though, considering the other examples on here. * Not as bad as several aforementioned examples, but this troper has a friend whose mother is kind of the type. He even cited "not wanting

another mother" as the reason he wasn't keen on the idea of a relationship with a girl of the controlling type. Luckily, that never came to pass for other reasons. His friends are having a lot of fun with him about this, often being able to accurately predict when it's his mother that's calling him. * This troper's mother tried to be this for the first 15 years of his life. She would read through his conversations, which he carefully edited when done, check his grades, which he jacked up so she couldn't see, go through his homework, which he'd conveniently "lose", and freak out about my emotionally unstable girlfriend who flickers between spiteful bitch, distant companion and absolutely delightful romantic frequently. This all came to an end when, in the same day, I showed her all of my grades, showed her how I do my homework (Showing absolutely none of the work, just simple answers, which gave his teachers-at-the-time a hernia), told her about how I absolutely LOVE the masochism tango I was in with my girlfriend, and even told her that I'd been dancing it with her for something like 3 years at the time. She left me alone about that stuff from then on. * My mother is this at times. I really do love her and she helped me a lot during my childhood, but the whole picking out what I wear everyday, leaving 'cute' notes in my notebook about how much she loves me, getting mad a me for not saying 'I love you' over the phone at the end of each conversation, and cutting up my food for me? Kinda getting old... * [[{{Fishsicles}} This Troper]]'s mother likes to plan out everything that he does, even when there are other things that he does. Not as bad as other examples on this page, but still irritating. [[WeaselWords Somewhat]] justified in that he is basically BrilliantButLazy (with an extra helping of lazy) personified. * [[{{LtHikaru}} This Troper]]'s mom does this in little ways. If we go out, she always asks us if we have our keys, wallet, cell phone, warm jacket, what have you. And then she hangs a big ol' lampshade on her behavior by saying "Oh, let me micromanage your life just a little bit more!" It's mostly a joke now, since she expects us to be selfsufficient within reason (letting ourselves in the house, arranging transportation to places). * Not [[DokEnkephalin ThisTroper's]] mother; we've gone for years without so much as an email, or even knowing where in the country either of us are living. But after listening to her complain about current husband's mother, I had the pleasure of throwing her own advice, given to my sister, back at her "You have to watch out for those Momma's boys." And she should've known better, because her first mother-in-law, ''my Dad's mother'', was a control freak to a terrifying degree. * This troper's mother. Micromanages everything even when I've explicitly told her I don't want to do what she wants me to do, reads my prep obsessively, looks through my texts, nags me constantly, won't let me go outside because "it's not safe", is obsessed with me and always wants to be near me, sets ridiculous curfews on my behaviour (not allowed out after 10.30, in bed by 9.30), never trusts me to make sensible decisions, always tries to do things for me even when I know more about what I'm supposed to be doing than she does...yeah,

basically she tries to live my life for me. No wonder this troper likes being away from her mother. * This troper's mum wants to control everything from the hobbies she wants me to have to ''how I walk and talk'' (apparently, I'm too boyish in behaviour), complete with shoving backwards, misogynist ideas down my throat. When I was studying in the same city as my parents, she tried to get me to come home every single weekend based on completely stupid excuses. On a particular evening when I was in a hurry to go back to my dorm, my little sister notes: "If I was her, I'd go too." It's resulted in my dad keeping me as far away from the household as for as long as humanly possible so that I don't lose the self-reliance and self-survival skills I gained when I was seventeen and my parents lived halfway across the Earth. My aunt and uncle have started to become a bit like this as well, but their case is more than justified: [[TearJerker they lost their son to cancer scarcely two months ago and I'm the closest youngster they have to his age.]] * Not nearly as bad as some of the examples on this page, but my mom could be considered as a smother. She once said that when I move out to go to university that she would ''move to an apartment near campus'' before I insisted otherwise. Whenever I go out with friends, she always assumes we're going to be getting plastered/doing drugs/having sex, despite me never having done anything to make her suspect such things. She assumes she knows everything about me and knows my every thought... even though she ''really, really doesn't''. She reads my texts and paws through my internet history, getting extremely angry if she finds a page... that ''has swearing on it.'' She also reads my diary, and again, got furious at me for swearing in a private diary that ''no one was ever meant to see,'' writing things like 'this is not the vocabulary a young lady should have!!' in the margins. She has a variety of excuses for reading my journal. Everything from 'I'm afraid that you, a happy-as-can-be youngster, might become ''suicidal'', and I'm reading it for hints' to simply 'this is my house, and you can have some privacy when you get your own house'. Still, otherwise, she is a great mom, and I can't help but love her clingy, at-times annoying self. ** This is this tropette's mother. Period. * My mother is nowhere near as bad as most of these, but she does have her moments. I'm 40, and she calls me almost every night to check up on me. The crowning moment, which I gleefully shared with my siblings so we could rag on her mercilessly later, was when a class I was in planned a weekend trip to Quebec City. Since funds were limited, odds were good that we would only have two rooms, and they would have to be unisex. Mom flipped out and told me I couldn't go. The week before the trip, she called and said that she guessed it would be all right, since there would be another girl in my room for protection. Good thing I had signed up over a month before and had already made all the necessary arrangements. The punchline: this was about two years ago. I was 38. * I had a landlady who was like this. She constantly complained about how my mother kept the house and gave unsolicited parenting advice. She would talk for hours, even if it was obvious that the other person was desperately trying to politely end the conversation. Once, she

told me that most women my age (20) already had full-time jobs, kids, and went to school full-time. My response that my mother had taught me better than to have a baby at such a young age did not go over well. Note, I was attending college full-time and was looking for a job but due to the economy was having no luck. When my mother and I moved, she came over for a visit and, without asking, walked through the house, dragging her apologetic husband with her. She was a nice person and let my mother rent the place much cheaper than it was worth, but God, did she annoy me. * Once, this troper and my brother wanted to stay home while our parents went out. My mother's excuse for why we couldn't? The police might come check and see if we'd been left alone. Don't you just hate those random police investigations? * Even though I've recently been allowed to stay up as long as I want in weekends... I have to stay in my room after Mom's gone to bed. Sucks for me if I want to play the Wii in the basement, because there's [[SarcasmMode too much of a risk of someone seeing lights in the basement and breaking in at night...]] [[FridgeLogic ...wouldn't it actually be more likely for robbers to break into a house with no lights, meaning either that everyone's asleep or that there's no one home?]] ** She also won't let me use the sewing machine for making {{cosplay}} clothes, because 1. she's afraid I'll break anything, which is... slightly understandable because it costs a lot to repair it if it should happen, or so she says, and: 2: ''She's afraid I'll get too disappointed if the clothes don't turn out the way I want.'' ...REALLY, mom. Really? Does she think I can't handle small letdowns like that at ALL? ** Also, it's just ''sad'' seeing how she sometimes has to ask my brother if he's put on new underwear for today, especially for gym class. He's ''14''. * This troper doesn't have any issues with her OWN mother.. she's great (Crazy, but great). Her sister, however, is so incredibly clingy, demanding, dependant, and everything else you can think of.. She's probably going to be a Smother to my godson but only time will tell on that one (He's only 6). * I had this neighbor for a time she was married and had three little boys and she was very over protective of them and overly religious, she wouldn't allow them to watch cartoons including Disney, play video games, play trading card games, eat snacks with sugar, play sports, and go trick or treating (because Halloween was "the devil's day") all because of very silly reasons, I felt so sorry for them they were basically not allowed to do really anything without her consent, any time she caught my family members and I doing something with them she wouldn't allow them to do she would yell at us and tell us "you are setting a bad example for them", the dad on the other hand was more relaxed and he didn't agree with everything she did, he even snuck out to take them trick or treating once, eventually they moved away, I wonder what the kids are like now. * Without going into details, I will simply say that I know from experience that when this trope is combined with ParentalFavoritism, the results are [[{{Understatement}} not good at all]].

* my beloved smother is a homophobic, manipulative bastard that makes me suffer for my sexual orientantion and always trying to manipulate me through her health issues, she is so annoying that I do not feel any affection for her and I maintain a facade to avoid destroying my family * This troper's [[MyBelovedSmother (s)mother]] is like this. Despite the fact that he is 17, she thinks every person [[RealLife out there]] intends to rape and/or murder him in a most gruesome manner. [[MindScrew For additional fun]], he is being guilt tripped for not having enough friends every now and then. Here's an example conversation. -->Mother: "Why are you late?!" -->This troper: "I was talking to someone from school." -->Mother: "I really think you need more friends. So why are you late?" -->This troper: "*sigh* I took a later bus so I could talk to him." -->Mother: [[RuleOfThree "Why?"]] * My mom was very... territorial of our house when she was there, to the point where I was actively discouraged from bringing friends over. This left more than a few budding friendships fallow, much to my chagrin. When she left and moved back to Maryland, my ''uncle'', of all people, called her out on it when my sister was denied a sleepover. According to my little sister, she's been getting much better. Due to my hometown being relatively small, I didn't meet any new friends until high school, several years after the divorce. * This troper's mother. She's obsessive-compulsive about keeping our house completely spotless. No one many come over until the house is clean, according to her. Meaning that whenever you ''want'' someone to come over, you must dust every nook and cranny. ** This same troper's mother on her Facebook wall. Her comments range from something as simple as "HELLO!" to something as mortifying as, "I luv your new haircut sweety." I'm not 5~! I didn't even want to be friends with my own mother in the first place. Well, at least there's a delete button... * Definitely not as bad as other examples on this page, but my mother insisted on a curfew of 9pm...when I was twenty years old, and my sister was nineteen. This was an issue since my sister and I were active in school organizations, meetings usually started past 6pm but we had to get out by 7:30 if we wanted to make it home on time. Unfortunately graduation didn't solve these problems: mother still insists we tell her where we're going, and starts fretting if we aren't home by dark. Note that I'm about to go to medical school, and my sister just got her first job as a schoolteacher. * This (high-school-age!) troper's mother began questioning me about possible drug use when I had the misfortune of accidentally referring to a 5-man sleepover I went to as a "party". * This troper has a friend who's mom is completely this. She was terrified that when he went off to University that it would be horrifying for him and that everyone would hate him, since he is a bit of an Otaku. It might be kind of justified since she is an extremely fundamentalist Christian, and it is a Christian University. What happened? They discovered that literally everyone here is into

something geeky or nerdy, and was ''not'' what she expected from a Christian University. She tried to get him expelled. She failed, and he's doing fine now, but it got rediculous for a while. ---Go back to MyBelovedSmother. Bring a jacket, and look both ways before crossing the-NO! WAIT! I'll bring you there myself! ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MyCarHatesMe * I can't be the only one who would love to see this in a Medieval setting. -->"My horse won't go!" ** Oh, that'd be hilarious. If this troper ever writes anything in a Medieval setting.... ** [[{{starshine}} This troper]] has ''seen that happen'' on vacation at a dude ranch. My father's horse suddenly decided it was not. going. any. further. I honestly can't remember how we got both of them back to the stable. ** Mules. Full stop. Literally. *** [[TheAllegedCar The Alleged Horse]]. * [[{{Garbonzo42}} This troper]] got a '70s model Crown Vic from his Grandfather when I got my driver's license, in 'good condition'. I drove it most likely less than twenty times. The second time he drove it, the brakes died. Then the radiator broke. Then the engine died, and it need towed. Then reason, the thing wouldn't accelerate properly, making it REAL fun to pull onto the highway. And then the speedometer cable broke WHILE ON THE HIGHWAY AT CRUISING SPEED. As in, *BANG*, speedometer drops to 0. I honestly believe that that car was going to get me killed. But hey, FREE CAR! Paid more on repairs than I paid for it's replacement. ** [[SarcasmMode Funnily enough]], my two car accidents were in my father's actually very good '98 Chevy Pickup. Go figure. * [[{{Xaris}} This troper's]] car has a habit of not wanting to work when he wants to get lunch. First time it broke a clutch-related part when retrieving a paycheck to have money to go to lunch, the second time was after work and he left the dashboard lights on, draining the battery and the third time was when he was going to get breakfast before going to work in which the rainy day made the 16 year old car's engine too moist to start. * This Troper once had a car that would spontaniously refuse to start, then miraculously start working again before the mechanics got around to looking at it. I eventually figured out the problem (moisture messing with the electronics that would evaporate eventually), but not before having three mechanics in two different cities swear I was insane. * This Troper has a 1986 GMC Vandura that... 1: Had the heater core fail. Cue loss of coolant and engine overheating twice(as in, temp off the scale). Nothing happened, the engine worked fine both times. 2: Had the engine randomly die when not moving, and sometimes when moving

slowly. 3: Had the alternator fail. 4: Had the starter fail. 5: Had the starter ''solenoid'' fail. 6: Had it ''run over my foot'' while nobody was in the vehicle. Note it was on a flat surface and in neutral, and I had stopped the vehicle beforehand(got out to pick something up that was in front of the vehicle. By the way, did you know the human foot can take at least 1,200 lbs of weight?) Yeah... Yet I love it all the same, and never want to get rid of it! * I had a motorcycle that was like this once. When test driving it I was hit by a car that came out of a dead end. Over the 8 months that I rode it (after the repairs) - the cooling fan died, radiator boiled over regularly even with a replacement fan, at one point couldn't idle and had a habit of dying when stopped at traffic lights, headlights stopped working, indicators stopped working, bike refused to drop into neutral while the engine was running (could have been worse, it wouldn't start at all unless it was in neutral), starter had to be replaced, the replacement fairing that was put on during the repairs cracked... yeah. * Today my Taurus broke down for no reason right there on the road. It just rolled over to 37000 miles. * Completely subverted by my now-deceased Acclaim. Planning on suicide by car, the car simply refused to start that morning. I broke down and admitted myself into a psychiatric unit. The car was towed to the mechanic, who had no trouble starting it whatsoever - nor did it ever fail to start on the first turn of the key for the remainder of its useful life. ** "My car stages a suicide intervention"? Awesome, dude. * This troper's father got a lovely Mustang as his first car. It was delivered to his driveway, and he got in, started it up and backed out, at which point the breaks fail and the car was totaled against a tree. * The first alcohol-fueled cars in Brazil were not designed for cold weather. Cue this trope happening when you drove to southern Brazil during winter (temperatures in the 10C range are standard here) in one of them. * This troper's car, which is older than this troper himself, can have a temper at times. More than once it has mysteriously died, refused to start for as long as an hour, then started on the next try with neither rhyme nor reason. On the longest remembered stall, though, it turned out that [[WhatAnIdiot the car was not in 'park']]. * in this troper's case, it was her bike( a 21 speed, if she recalls.) it had the worst breaks ever, which were rather needed, as she lived at the top of a long and steep hill. much like Calvin's bike, it tried many times to kill her, including trying to eat her leg. she kids you not, her leg was once trapped between the rear tire and bike seat, as she half rode, half stumbled down the street. ** This Troper had a bike whose brakes had an unfortunate habit of completely failing right as I was going into quite busy intersections. * After a particularly nasty wreck that left This Troper temporarily blinded in her left eye, her father joked the airbag that caused the blindness was the car's last revenge against all the times she accidentally ran it into ditches, other cars, etc. * The gearbox of this troper's mother's car hates him. The car starts

fine, but the spring missing from the gear-lever means that at the worst possibly moment, gear changes may be interrupted with an embarrassingly loud crunch as the location is midjudged, and reverse just refuses to engage at random moments. In a zombie apocalypse, this troper will park facing away from the danger. * This troper's car decided that, transitioning from the 15 freeway to the the 10 (If you have no idea what I'm talking about, blame my socal accent), it wanted to die. To avoid rear-ending slowing traffic, I hit the brakes, which literally did nothing for several seconds, so, lacking other options (and not wanting to sacrifice my 3 year old car), I maneuvered to the shoulder, clipped a piece of loose asphalt, and punctured a tire. Then the brakes kicked in. * My car enjoys shutting its doors on my legs and other appendages with, literally, no outside force. * My '96 Mustang. Good car overall, but it gets terrible mileage in town, has a very deep clutch, and the gearbox'll get stuck at the ''worst'' possible times. I ended up having to use both hands to get it out of reverse once, on a paycheck Friday, in the Wal-Mart parking lot. And then there's the time the first gear didn't engage properly going into a left turn, [[NoodleIncident but that incident shall never be spoken of again.]] ---Startstartstart!Comeon!Gogogogogogogogo! Get out and run back to MyCarHatesMe. ---<<|TroperTales|>> )

MyDadCanBeatUpYourDad * My father is an aerospace engineer who mostly teaches and writes research papers, but it's more fun to claim that "my daddy is a rocket scientist!" * This troper skipped a generation. She would brag that her ''grand''father was at Pearl Harbor when it got bombed. That said, now she just says "My dad's second generation [[RetiredBadass retired veteran]] and [[BadassBiker rides a Harley he works on himself]]." [[IfYouEverDoAnythingToHurtHer It makes for a fun way to scare potential boyfriends]], especially when the troper mentions she is just like her daddy. <3 ** Wanna go out for coffee sometime? Please? ** [[CompletelyMissingThePoint You're also a second generation retired veteran?]] * [[{{Thespaceinvader}} This troper]]'s dad once bought him a souvenir from one of the museums in London where he worked. He told me that he had shot it on the way to work. This became my 8-year-old self's response to this kind of argument about whose dad was better: --> Well MY dad shoots sharks on the way to work. * Can't exactly boast about my father, but my '''MOTHER''' regularly scares the crap out of people (this troper included). She might not be able to "beat up" your dad, but she can certainly make him wet his pants in fear!

** Are you my sister? ** This troper one-ups you by talking about his Badass Grandma from Jamaica, who, despite being 90 years old and blind in one eye, runs a farm, where she chases down chickens, wrestles pigs, ties up/ fights with goats, and fights off weed-heads. (Okay, he exaggerates ''just'' a tad. She killed the pig last year to celebrate... something or other.) * On my first day of second grade, a kid named [[{{JerkAss}} Randy]] told me on the bus, "My dad could kill your dad." My [[EpicFail notso-witty]] response? "Well, my dog could pee on your foot." * {{FacePalm}}* ** Oh yeah? Well, my cat can kick your dog's ass! *** Oh yeah? YEAH? My goldfish could kick both your animal's butts-and both your fathers, at the same time! Not to mention my ninja-tortoisedragon-penguin-piranhas! * My cousin and me got into an argument similar to this, except it went a bit different: --> Cousin:"My dad is older than yours" --> Me: "Oh yeah, well, my dad's 40" --> Cousin: "My dad's 45" --> Me: "My dad's 50" I think you can see where this is going (I think it ended around 130). If you want the truth, his dad WAS older than my dad by a few years. * My dad is retired Coast Guard and worked in contingency planning in NYC. If it wasn't for his work, the plane that landed in the Hudson would have stayed there a lot longer and there might have been casualties. * This troper once got in a heated argument with my friend about which one of our dads was better at Tetris. * This troper's father is a brown-belt in Taekwondo, and HIS father was a New York City beat-cop for years before he fought in Korea. * [[{{Jcatgrl}} This troper]] often brags that her dad was stationed at a missile silo in Montana during the Cold War, and would've been the guy to press the button if the president had called and said, "Push the button". Also, I once said this trope word for word to my little sister (A full blooded sister, not a step or half), which resulted in quite a bit of confusion, and then roflcoptering on her part. * My father's not all that impressive physically (average height, more-than-Hollywood pudgy), but he's a pastor, so on occasion I've used the variant "my dad can ''bury'' your dad". * My dad used to launch F-14s off the flight deck of an aircraft carrier. HE CAN BEAT THE TAR OUT OF ALL YOUR DADS. * I said this as a joke to a friend before I remembered that his dad is dead. ** Ouch! That must've smarted when you realized your mistake. And hopefully he recognized it as a mistake. * My dad was a muscular, strong plumber who fashioned his own homemade dumbbells using old coffee cans, cement, and old metal pipe fragments. He was in a street gang in {{The Fifties}} when they were just groups of your fellow compatriots in poorer neighborhoods and all conflicts were settled by fistfights, and was an amateur boxer in his teens and

twenties. The only reason he didn't get shipped off to Vietnam was because he was the only living male survivor in his family (his dad died while stationed in Germany during the Korean War). He was a master at giving fierce looks that stopped people in their tracks and did not abide by bratty kids; in his final years, he would regularly glare at kids throwing temper tantrums and they would always stop whatever they were doing immediately afterward. My dad was a badass. And my mom might have not been one for fighting and not a strong person, but she could strike fear into the hearts of my much bigger, taller, older, football playing male cousins, had an imposing and intimidating presence, and was a very strict disciplinarian when she wasn't being sociable. Unless your mom was a very stern, old fashioned, Victorian-era mom, my mom could make your mom run for cover. * My father is an intelligent, slightly-built, soft-spoken, intensely kind-hearted [[{{Badass Bookworm}} English major]] who rescues abandoned kittens on a regular basis. He raised 3 children on his own (the youngest of whom, me, was only 6 weeks old when Mom left) and did an exceptional job. He worked as a logger for 20 years because it was the only job he could find. As far as I'm concerned, his life has been one example of bad-assery after another, but this is one that really stands out: when I was 6 years old, my dad was home from work with an awful case of the flu. We lived in the middle of nowhere, and had neighbors who routinely left their 6 children home alone. Their 10year-old son called, sobbing, terrified because an animal had tried to attack him and his sisters in their front yard (it had been distracted at the last moment by their dog). My dad, barely able to stand because he was so sick, loaded his shotgun and went over there, where he was charged by a rabid mountain lion. He had to empty the shotgun to bring it down, and after the second shot, he actually started WALKING TOWARD the charging mountain lion because he was pissed that it wouldn't die. * I used to work at a day care center. One morning, two of the kids were arguing over whose dad had the best cell phone, saying things like "My daddy's cell phone is ''this'' big!" and gesturing with their hands. The fun part was that while the kids obviously thought that the bigger the better, this was back when everyone wanted as small phones as possible. * This Troper's father is a brown-belt in Taekwondo, an ex-Air Force serviceman (I don't know what they're called), and a former wrestler and rugby player. He is also a lawyer, and [[BadassBookworm can kick ass both physically AND verbally]]. * My dad was a weightlifter during his young adulthood. Even decades later, he's still ridiculously muscled. When I was younger, he probably could have beaten up the other kids' dads if he'd had the inclination. * This troper's dad may be a bald, [[LargeHam weird]] vegetarian, but he can DESTROY YOU. * My friend and I have an interesting variation. We will constantly argue about whose big brother is cooler. We also argue about whose math teacher is cooler. ---[[MyDadCanBeatUpYourDad My daddy can go back to the main page faster

than yours!]] ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MyEyesAreUpHere * Interesting variation. {{This troper}} swordfights. She uses a specific style where you are supposed to keep your sword pointed at your opponent's face whenever possible unless in the middle of an attack. She was helping to teach a male friend the basic stance, but, swords being heavy, he kept lowering the blade to - you guessed it [[ThisTroper this troper's]] breasts. Finally, she lifted the tip of the blade to point at her face and corrected him [[CrowningMomentOfFunny "I know that's where your eyes want to go, but you need to keep the sword up here."]] ** I'm pretty sure there's a DoubleEntendre in there somewhere, yes? * {{This troper}} has never had to invoke those words herself, but only because the man she shares her mechanic bay with at work does it for her. * Occurred one time to {{this troper}} who was talking to one of her cousin's friends. He wouldn't stop staring at her breasts so she uttered the fateful phrase. * [[{{Pita}} This troper's]] female friend has huge boobs, so she's developed a reflex where she constantly says "Stop looking at my tits". I never do, until a few days ago, when she said that, and I got annoyed and said "Now I'm curious" and deliberately stared for ten minutes. She's stopped, since. But now I've noticed... they're really huge... * A girl in my high school wore a very tight t-shirt with 'get a life' in very small print across the chest. Cue one of my friends getting his face within maybe an inch of them, and reading really loudly and slowly, "Get... a... lyy-fee." He got a 2 day suspension for sexual harassment, of course. * I'm kind of hoping I get into this situation, so I can respond "Yeah, but your boobs are down there, [[AllMenArePerverts and you need to study male psychology]]." ** I'm kind of hoping I get into the situation above, so I can retort with "and you need to stop using outdated Freudian psychology to justify your dickish behaviour." **** Now I'd kind of like to be a viewer to the above situation, so that I can slap you both across the back of the heads and tell you to get on with your lives. Go out, do something you've never done before, meet a nice member of the opposite sex whose face you enjoy looking at, stop spending your time have dumb shit arguments on TVTropes. Oh, [[HypocriticalHumor wait...]] * A very, very fit male friend of [[ThisTroper this female troper]] had to use this line on her once when they were at the beach. She only uses the line herself when the starer is being ridiculously obvious about it. Except for one time when she was in the middle of talking to a particularly intent starer, she put on the Scream mask she was holding and then crossed her arms over her chest. [[HilarityEnsues His

reaction]] when he looked up may have been worth every sleazy line or obvious stare [[ThisTroper this troper's]] boobs have ever gotten and more. * [[ThisTroper This male troper]] wants to say this line when someone he tries talking to looks at his or her cell phone more than looking at him. If they continue to do so afterwards, he'll grab at the phone. I've yet to have a chance to do this before, so I wait. Feel free to do the same. * I tend to look slightly down without focusing on anything in particular when I'm thinking deeply about things. Once a female friend of mine who happened to have a pair of mammaries of epic proportions stood in front of me, and drew the obvious conclusion. Me, being the snarker that I am, responded to her use of this {{trope}} with an angry, deep stare at her bosom and a firm "[[TheSimpsons I've made my choice]]!". ** ThisTroper also tends to look down when thinking or simply listening to the speaker carefully. He never had the "{{My eyes are up here}}" statement but he eventually became aware of what was in his line of sight and has shifted his gaze to the side. * [[Tropers/CommandoDude This Troper]] does not like to make eye contact and looks down at the neck, or chest. Thus, constantly worries about this {{trope}} being invoked. It's kind of hard to explain it's NotWhatItLooksLike. And he doubts he will be believed anyways since [[{{DoubleStandard}} he's]] [[{{AllMenArePerverts}} a man.]] * [[ThisTroper This (male) Troper]] had to invoke this once, under very unusual circumstances. Basically, carrying a diorama made up mostly of your action figures, plus being at least a head taller than most people means he had to say this quite a bit during a long walk from where he had his car parked to where he had his classes. * A slight subversion with {{this troper}}: Talking to a girl he liked, (who happened to possess a rather voluptuous chest), and he kept his eyes looking straight ahead, into hers. After half an hour of talking she said, "Seriously, your staring really hard at my eyes. You're trying to not look down, aren't you?" I nodded and she smiled so sweetly, and said, "Thank you for making an effort." * {{This troper}} had it happen to her...she was wearing a low-cut shirt under a sweater, and she had the sweater unzipped far enough and just high enough so that the fabric of the shirt wasn't showing. She didn't actually notice until she saw a classmate staring there for a good 10 seconds. >.>;;; * Even with the tracts of land [[Tropers/AstraKiseki this troper]] has, [[SubvertedTrope people really don't do it]] unless she is [[JustifiedTrope wearing a shirt with a saying on it.]] This may come from the fact she is short, very good at making eye contact, or she is just [[CaptainOblivious that unaware]]. * Inverted with one of [[ThisTroper this troper's]] old girlfriends a while ago: She noticed that I hadn't spared her cleavage a second glance and asked her friend if she should be offended. * {{This troper}} gets this a lot, being 6'3" around 5' tall women and looking down. They just assume I'm [[MaleGaze looking there]].... * For an upcoming gaming con, I have a button that says "Do not tell me about your character". I'm planning on wearing it on my cleavage.

* {{This troper}} played up this {{trope}} once, where upon meeting up with a few female friends, he very visibly stared at their chests from the moment he arrived. When they finally asked what he was doing, he stated "I'm just going for it." Much laughter was had by all. * {{This troper}} had to say this alot in primary school because she developed early but as she got older it has not happened at all. She thinks it is because most people just look over her head. (she is 150 cms tall) * A girl at my high school was wearing a tight t-shirt with the words "get a life" in tiny print across the chest. Cue one of my friends getting his face about 2 inches from them and reading really loudly. "GET A LY-FEE. Is that French?". This particular friend tended to hassle girls who dressed sexy and then got offended/annoyed when guys looked at them. Another time he fixed this one girl with an unblinking unwavering stare, and when she complained, ''he'' complained back that he was trying to look at the air and she kept standing in the air he was trying to look at. * This troper had this happen once. A male classmate who had never spoken to me before suddenly felt the urge to strike up a conversation on one of very few days when I was actually wearing a more fitted shirt rather than the baggy shirts I often wore. Problem was, he was EXTREMELY obvious, to the point of randomly exclaiming, "That's a really cool shirt!" .... And then continued to stare at my chest for almost two full minutes. This troper was horrifically embarrassed and more than a little irritated, and quickly turned around and pretended to be doing something. Doesn't help that said guy was a total douche who would normally only speak to a select few he deemed "worthy" enough to communicate with his greatness. Needless to say, [[{{Understatement}} I was unimpressed with him.]] ----Now go stare at the main MyEyesAreUpHere page. ----

MyFriendsAndZoidberg * In an RP I am in, whenever the main characters are addressed it usually ends up as "The Phantom Hawks and Mr. Dark", with Mr. Dark being my character. Subverted though because Mr. Dark really isn't in the Phantom Hawks; he just follows them around, interacts with them, and often gets caught in their adventures whenever he is not purposefully trying to be with them. * When this troper was a freshman, his English class was supposed to list the different "cliques" in our high school...Jocks, Preps, Goths, etc. This troper's group decided to put him in a clique of his own. * This troper's high school computer science teacher would regularly address the class as "Ladies, Gentlemen and [someone's name]". ** [[JapaneseTeeth This troper]] and his friends did this to ourselves, intentionally, because we didn't fit anywhere else. We eventually became known as "the Misfitz". By the end of senior year we were the largest social group. * This troper: ** Greets groups of his brother's friends along the lines of "Hey

squids - and Ryan." Ryan is the giant one. ** Was in Music Club in highschool. Being the only male flute, the teacher regularly got our attention with "Okay, ladies-" "Hello!" "And Cameron.". I'm Cameron. * This Troper (Cathy) often hang out with three guys so I became the "...and Cathy." Also, in my Portuguese class, I'm the only nonBrazilian or Portuguese student, so the teacher and staff often say "So you, native speaker..." "Hey!" "...And Cathy." * A RunningGag in this troper's D&D campaign, where during every session's introduction the party is referred to as "our heroes", with the obligatory ChaoticEvil HeroicSociopath party member's name (and sometimes the name of the TeamPet too) tacked on as a concessionary afterthought. Once Inverted, with said sociopath's name ''first'', with "our heroes" following it. ** This troper made the very same joke once, when I presented the party as "the brave adventurers, and Nelby", Nelby being the token kleptomaniac cowardly (the "wets his pants every other occasion" kind ok cowardice) rogue. Didn't became a RunningGag, but helped the player to establish his character as the most despicable member of the party (which, when you know the kind of things my players pull off, is quite an achievment). * This troper once wrote on a birthday card for a friend: "From the people who love you... and Sarah!" * When this troper was in his first year of high school, it was announced to the class that the hockey club was available to "Boys, girls... and Alfie". This was an obvious joke to make as Alfie was (and still is) completely mad, but rather than being insulted, he kept up the idea that he was something completely different by replying with the completely nonsensical "Wib Wib". * [[{{Tropers/Nerrin}} This troper]] basically lived this up until a few years ago. He was never really part of any particular group or clique, but (when he wasn't being an ostracized ButtMonkey in elementary and middle school) could sort of get along with some people from every group. So he ended up being the "[[MyFriendsAndZoidberg and Zoidberg]]" to any group he spent much of any time with. * A variation used with [[TheTallOne this Troperette.]] I'm terrible with names, so my greetings are often to the lines of "Sarah!... And company." * Whenever I forget a few people in a group of people, I usually address them as "...And various people that I know." * This troper claims this particular trope as his own; At any point in time when he finds himself greeting a group of mixed gender, he will say, "Ladies... * Name of one of the guys* ." Though he supposes it's an inversion to insultingly imply inclusion rather than exclusion. ** This troper has a teacher who uses this trope regularly. He'll say "Ladies, gentleman, and [name of a student]." Normally this would be insulting, but since he does it to a different student every day, it's just amusing. *** This troper's housemate inverts this - he'll say "Ladies...* Name of female present* .", thus insulting as many people as possible. ** This troper has a buddy in a band who during one show told a story about hanging out with the boys, and this troper, (a guy), and then

later during the same show said it was good to see the girls on the dance floor; Jess, Sam, this troper. *** Is that Sam a guy or a girl? * Spoken recently in robotics club: -->'''Kyle:''' We're all friends here.\\ '''Andrew:''' Hey!\\ '''Kyle:''' Alright, friends and Andrew. ** Um... wild guess, but would this Andrew happen to be a brown-haired high school sophomore with detailed plans for surviving a zombie attack, world domination, etc., who is also a walking encyclopedia? ** And is he a hulking giant? ** No, just tall and lankey and ME!!! ** Kowalski? * On this troper's track team, it's custom to end the practice with a quick game of "man/woman/Ravi-hunt" * Sleeping arrangements at this troper's summer camp: "Boys over there, girls over there, [class clown] over there." * This troper's history teacher lives off of this trope, often beginning his lectures with, "Ladies, gentlemen... and Patricia," occasionally replacing Patricia's name with that of someone else who wasn't paying attention at the time. * Making ''everyone'' "[[MyFriendsAndZoidberg and Zoidberg]]" is a favorite of mine, often greeting the lunch table with "My adoring public! Also [name], [name], and [name]." * When this troper was asking a friend about what movies were popular at the movie theater he worked at, he told me that United 93 and R.V. were particularly popular for the weekend. I mentioned that it was an odd mix, and he said, "Well, one of them is about a disaster that affected millions of people, and the other is about some people on a plane." * This troper, Adam, has two brothers, Matthew and Peter. A friend of all of us had had a falling out with one of them, and not long after found himself introducing us to his cousin: "These are my two friends, Adam and Matthew, and this is Peter"... * [[{{Tropers/LeighSabio}} This Troper's]] response to a quote stating that the cold war was "a final, all-out battle between Communistic Atheism and Christianity." was "So... on the one hand we have a poor long-haired revolutionary who said that it was easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to be a good man, and on the other hand we have communism?" ** Don't forget "if one of you has 2 coats and your brother has none you must give him you spare coat' (Actually St. Paul but still Christianity). Really, were it not for the whole Atheism thing Communism would be ''the'' Christian ethos. * It was a {{Running Gag}} by my teacher in my health class. "Alright boys and girls! And Zack." In any class that student was stuck in with that teacher, he was always treated like a {{Butt Monkey}} by him. It also runs in a few other groups at school calling a certain student an "it". * [[{{Tropers/FreeVerse}} This Troper]] has become a frequent target of this among his friends as a RunningGag. [[ButtMonkey I hope.]] * This troper had a teacher who called for attention with "Boys,

Girls, and In-betweens". * This Troper frequently greets groups of three as, for example, "Ben! Dan! The rest!" and once referenced that he was with "his very sexiest friends, and Sam." * This Troper got volunteered for a detail in ROTC after others had been called, so he showed up late. The leader was rattling off the names of the people on the detail, and once he finished This Troper walked up and quipped, "And Fitz!" * This troper had a high school teacher who would refer to his class as "Children... and other forms of life." The day of his 18th birthday, said troper proudly claimed his place as an "other form of life." * This troper's Video Game Programming class's teacher said "All right ladies, gentlemen, and rapists." I muttered "And Zoidberg" under my breath. * Geology teacher: "Remember that hunger isn't limited to developing countries. A lot of industrial countries, and Russia, have it too." * This troper was the only girl in an otherwise all-male technology course back in the 7th grade. The teacher would always refer to us as "Gentlemen, and [Name]". * This troper actually invokes this quite a lot without thinking. Whilst talking to several friends, I invariably insult the lot and always suffix it with "and [[LetsPlay KZX]]" due to him being the only one this troper truly respects. ** Holy shit, are you Phantom Savage?! * This troper tends to do this whenever a person she dislikes is in the room with her friends. It tends to go like "Oh hey guys! ...and Carlos." * This tropers biology professor made a list of different organisms each class member was to write about for university, except for this troper... * This troper knows two guys (no, not ThoseTwoGuys.) and usually addresses them as, "Hi, Tim! Hi guy who hangs out with Tim!" No, she doesn't know guy-who-hangs-out-with-Tim's name. * This troper delivered a presentation with his friend (Joe) in history that was (anonomously) peer assesed, one of the assements came back titled Sam(this troper) and Co. I have been calling Joe "and Co." ever since. * In this troper's high school, there are two main social groups, neither of which has this troper as a member. At lunch, he sits at a table filled with the others not part of that social group. We call ourselves [[OmniscientCouncilOfVagueness The Table]], appropriately and ominously enough. * My quirky art teacher during junior high usually greeted the class with "People! people! And Clas." He had a minor feud with said student. * ThisTroper has read all the HarryPotter books. His two friends have read all of ASeriesOfUnfortunateEvents and all of TheTwilightSaga, respectively. We're fans of well-written, creative and interesting literature...[[TakeThat and Twilight.]] * This troper's younger sister thought this troper's name was Guys when we were younger. When we were being called our parents would use

the phrase "come on guys". I would respond and she didn't prompting my parents to tack on her name separately. * This Troper's best friend Will often serves as the {{Butt Monkey}} of our friend group, and is often affectionately referred to simply as 'it'. He really embraces being in a category of his own, anyway. -->'''Will:''' * Does something unusual or amazing* \\ '''Nate:''' Why / How did you even do that?\\ '''Will:''' Because I'm Will _____. ** Ironically, he's also the most popular and social member of our group as well. * This Troper has a vid up on YouTube that has HerculesTheLegendaryJourneys footage set to "I Won't Say I'm In Love". In the description, I wrote about how Iolaus gets love advice from some goddesses and Joxer. * This Troper sits with different people every lunchtime, depending on the day. This has caused her to become a guest of all groups and a member of none. It's kind of depressing. And they don't even tack on her name. * [[{{djkates}} This troper]], at a seder with some fellow students, once responded to one student's inappropriate joke with "Please, there are ladies present! ...And Sara." * This troper's history class was talking about feudalism, and this troper was chosen as a LADY. Among 6 other LORDS. "Where are my lords?" "And ladies!" "... And ladies." HilarityEnsued as this troper is a WrenchWench, making some guys (who enjoyed tempting fate) ask, "You're a lady?" * This troper, when talking about some place or class, has habit of saying: "All the cool guys will be/are there... And Paavo." * When [[{{Tropers/McJeff}} this troper]] was in the Boy Scouts, his troop was split up into a half dozen or so older boys (16-17), and a swarm of younger ones. He was the only 14-year-old, and there were no 15-year-olds. So he always got And Zoidberged... and in the worst way. If the younger boys were doing it he was too old; if the older ones were, he was too young. * This troper was in a play where some of the characters had to sing a rendition of ''Respect'' by ArethaFranklin, and our pianist was trying to determine how the arrangement should be. "Fortunately we have a nice, high Soprano, a rich belty alto, a great tenor, and Jordan." * This troper has an interesting group of friends. Why? Because our names are Kassy, Kirstin, Kelly, Carissa, Courtney... and Steph. * A friend of mine just [[FlashBack reminisced a time when]] someone wanted to sit at our circle's lunchtable. Someone [[AnonymousRinger nondescript]] piped up, "Yeah, we're all friends here! And [[RealNameAsAnAlias Chuck]]." [[ButtMonkey Poor]] [[TheUnfavorite Chuck]]. * This Troper had two good ones in HighSchool. In Sophmore Year, I was the only guy in my Yoga Class (obviously the rest were women). The teacher would call us over by going, "Hey Girls, and Hank". Two Years later, as a Senior, I'm in a group where me and one other guy even seem smart. He has said at least twice, "I'm surrounded by retards, and Hank." * This Troper, her brother and a few other kids used to be driven to

school by a taxidriver in a minibus. (Since we lived outside of town and there were so few of us, there was no need for a regular school bus.) The driver was a very nice man, and he usually greeted us with our names every morning, but for some reason he always forgot mine. Which is why the greeting usually went something like this: "Good morning Daniel, Erik, Teddy and... Teddy's sister." * This troper's high school physics teacher (who loved to make fun of her students, especially the ones she really liked) said something that concluded "...Ladies and [[RealNameAsAnAlias Angelica]]." I asked her, "What's ''that'' supposed to mean?" She replied, "It can mean anything you want it to." * This Troper studies theatre, and there are some admittedly odd people (including this troper) in the class. However, one "Nicholas" has a very confusing sexual orientation, in that he has had a girlfriend in school and commonly refers to women as hot, but he's also really effeminate and quite creepy. My teacher referred to the class as "boys and girls, and Nicholas". * This Australian Troper was talking to another person on an AFL website. He congratulated my team on beating a team that was a threat to the finals. So I in turn congratulated his team on beating a talented team and the Brisbane Lions. * This troper has once adressed a group as 'ladies, guys, and Livys'. Not as mean as it sounds- Livy is genderqueer/Bifauxnen/something, and found it funny. * This Troper's ICT A Level class had one female student. As such, there were occasions when our teacher said, "Gentlemen...and Rachel" or variations. Normally, it was a rant about our lack of effort in the lessons, so it was justified. * This tropette hangs out with four chicks and a dude. When greeting them, it's usually: "Hey, girls! And Eric." * For an unintentional example, I was recently witness to a speech which began "Ladies and gentlemen, members of the Board of Education, and Mr. So-and-so..." Kind of a double example, both singling out Mr. So-and-so and implying that the [=BoE=] is made up of neither ladies nor gentlemen. * This Troper refers to any cash on hand as her presidents. Unless she has a ten, and then it's "My presidents and Mr. Hamilton." * This troper and a friend (let's call her X) have this joke/[[RunningGag running gag]] about how, when I have written a best seller, I will dedicate it to "all my friends... except X" * This Troper hangs out with and all-girl group during lunch... and Mitchell. * I played tuba in middle school. The woodwind and brass practiced separately, and there was only one girl in the brass. The director called us "Gentlemen and lady." * This troper's 4th edition Bard (name of Gregg Lifewalker) was part of an epic level campaign to kill Orcus. A later campaign took place a few centuries after Orcus fell. The way the story of how Orcus fell is often told begins like this: "Once, long ago, there were a group of brave and stalwart adventurers. And Gregg." * This troper was told to open a speech for Model UN with the words, "Greetings, Delegates and Capitalist Pigs" while he was representing

North Korea on nuclear weapons. The rhetoric went downhill from there. * I once experienced a bit of an inversion. Once, when walking into Youth Group, I announced to everybody there "Greetings, lesser mortals!". One of my friends, Joshua, then cleared his throat. "Oh, and Joshua". * This troper played with this once. She was once put in a group to work on a Power Point Presentation. We were supposed to name our powerpoints with the names of each of the group members to make them easier to find, but the girls my group decided to be funny and named it "X, Y, [[AndTheRest and the knuckleheads]]" Note that neither X nor Y was my name. [[ArentYouForgettingSomeone I pointed this out]], and they quickly changed it. This is probably justified, though; I was absent the day the groups were assigned and the powerpoint was started. * For this troper's Youtube video of her school choir singing "The Rainbow Connection", she put for the description "My school choir and [[GentleGiant Michael Verdi]] singing The Rainbow Connection from the Muppet Movie." [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohT_FaxYssI See for yourself.]] Speaking of which, he's wuite the fan of {{Futurama}}, EspeciallyZoidberg. * This troper did that in a couple of comedy sketches he wrote in high school based on some friends. "And now, ladies and gentlemen and Andrew and George..." The running gag being that Andrew and George -annoying little brothers that they were -- weren't gentlemen, but they sure weren't ladies, so. Sometimes they weren't even people. * This troper regards the BlackEyedPeas in a similar manner: will.i.am's the leader, Fergie's the curvy female, apl.de.ap's the one who's Filipino like me, and Taboo's the other one. * A forum [[{{Tropers/Kadorhal}} I]] regularly visit got trolled by a "natephilips" once; relatively early on, someone figured it was "probably just [[SomethingAwful Lithuanian dad or someone from SA]]". * An interesting variation happened in 4th grade for this troper, said by the class clown, which both insulted and avoided insulting people with the same And Zoidberg: "All girls are morons except Lisa here... and Patrick." * My friends...and Chris. * A running joke with a certain SurprisinglyImprovedSequel tabletop game, which split from the SoBadItsHorrible main game, and took "All the good players, and X". * This is from a Biology worksheet of mine: "This scientific study was conducted by a group of students (and Brandon)". * When this tropette was in school, I was commonly reffered to as "Eli's sister" by my brother's friends. So if someone was walking down the hall: "Hello Eli and Eli's sister!" Even his teachers did that. I know have a shirt that says "Hello, I'm Eli's sister". * In my DarkHeresy campaign I play a assassin who has the Unremarkable feat. This trope was called by name almost every session. Typically as "Sister Alpha and Brother Markus of the Imperial Inquisition are here to see you sir... and Vorden the accountant." Best part? I got the most kills AND was the most intimidating of all of the characters. * As a child, this troper was in a choir at church from a young age. As I got older, all of the other boys gradually dropped out. To make

matters worse, the teacher/director was also a teacher at an all-girls school, so she often forgot she was teaching one boy. Thus, this frequent call: "Ladies... and Rob." I left not too much longer, in part because I was sick of that. * This troper's bisexual friend complained that she was "only attracted to people with incompatible orientations... and Jason." * With my friends, it "and Tearahk", mainly because Tearahk has a habit of being the odd man out. Also, an inversion: --> [[HeroicSociopath Jake]]: Greetings, being of lesser intelect! --> [[TheChick Tearahk]]: Hey! --> Jake: Oh, that's right. And David. --> [[TheSmartGuy David]]: Yo. --> Tearahk: ''Hey!'' * This troper experienced a variation in history class. The teacher was addressing a group of boys who were doing an assignment together to work more quietly among themselves, using the word "gentlemen." There was a [[TheLibby girl]] sitting behind the group, not working with them, and, as she thought the teacher was for some reason including her in his statement, said, "Hey, you should say ''''''ladies'''''' and gentlemen, 'cause I'm no gentleman." I overheard her say this, and stealthily whispered to my friend, "Yeah, but she's not a lady, either." * This (female) troper was talking with a few friends at the start of a small assembly senior year, and to quiet us the teachers went "Ladies...and Joe." A joke or two was made about Joe being one of the ladies. It got funnier when gender-appropriate clothing was mentioned a minute later and one of the girls went "Yeah, no skirts, Joe." * At [[Tropers/CrystalGlacia my]] high school, we got a German exchange student, and he seemed to really enjoy tagging along with the band wherever we went. I mean, riding the bus with the bandos. Whenever we took attendance, he would always end up plopped at the end of the list, and his name would be called in a fashion like this. "...and Yannick!" "Here." * I have two examples of this. One uses me as the Zoidberg: at lunch at school, I usually sit at a table consisting of 7 to 10 girls (I'm a guy, FYI), with one or two guys usually coming over halfway through to sit. When they do, they'll sometimes say "Hello girls. Troper." Sometimes they'll just turn it into an insult by not adding the "Troper" to it. ** The second example happened once during a drama course. I had met about four or five people, and we usually hung out the few minutes before the course started. When I walked in, the group was assembled, along with my best friend. So I walked up and said "Hey, awesome people! And *best friend*!" Note that this was a joke - me and my best friend have sort of a RunningGag of treating each other like crap, but in a fun way - so we all laughed over it; it wasn't an insult or anything. * This troper loves to refer people in this fashion. * At this troper's school, a teacher said something along the lines of 'Girls, boys and Tyson'. It was a slip of the tongue, but MemeticMutation among the students involving Tyson's alleged lack of gender when this troper pointed it out.

* My crush once began talking about what he'd do if he suddenly had a lot of money, which included the phrase, "I'd take all of my friends to Japan. And you too, PenelopeB, if you wanted to come." While I know he respects me a lot, hearing him indirectly state he doesn't consider me a friend was [[SarcasmMode a lot of fun.]] * [[@/HomemadePsycho This Troper]]'s workplace is overwhelmingly female dominated.He gets a lot of Hey Girls...... and (Troper) ---MyFriendsAndZoidberg! You can ''all'' go back to MyFriendsAndZoidberg! ...Oh, yeah, you too. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MyGirlIsASlut * I'm just here to brag about how awesome my boyfriend is, although with us, this {{trope}} doesn't really manifest itself with regards to my sexual history (which is actually quite slim). My boyfriend just loves it when I flirt with other guys and other guys flirt with me (within reason, of course). He says that I am very beautiful and sexy, so it's only natural that men would want to flirt with me, and that ''he'' takes it as a compliment and a show of ''his'' good taste and luck in having me as his girlfriend. He's also completely not jealous about it because he figures that if he can't hold on to me even with constant "competition", then he probably doesn't deserve me. ** I try to behave the same way as his, and feel the same as he does. I salute you both and wish you a very good and awesome life. ** I am actually like your boyfriend. Only I wouldn't let you flirt too much... * Despite what is said about gay men being promiscous, guys in relationships behave much like real life heterosexual couples (as in: "I want to be have multiple partners. I want my partner(s) to only want me") ** [[{{Futurama}} LOVE DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY]] (in most cases). * {{This troper}} ''thinks'' he's into the idea, but the one time I was in anything resembling a real life poly relationship, it was only fine as long as I didn't have to hear details. (Though I figure if I pull off the steal I'm currently contemplating, I better get used to the idea real fast.) * Kind of subverted with my girlfriend. She's usually very shy when talking to just about any other guy or woman... But if she's talking to me... Just... *Fantasizes* ---MyGirlIsASlut and I wouldn't have it any other way. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MyGodWhatHaveIDone * This troper is almost the GeniusBruiser type, but this troper hardly

ever gets mad. But god, when he does, hell shalth be loosed on the object of his wrath. When I was a kid my brother and I were having an argument and he crossed the line by making an offhand comment about my weight (I wasn't that fat but was very sensitive) I grabbed his arm and yanked as hard as I could, causing him to fall flat on his face, I then proceeded to try to hurt him as badly as i could. This immediately made me [[TitleDrop name this trope]]. I also have gone deathly calm after a bully mocked me when i was in a bad mood, I actually almost made him cry. I feel terrible now. *cue emo* * I just killed a fly with a blowtorch. When I first hit it, its wings burnt off. So I burnt it on the ground and it was making a buzz that sounded like a scream and it's tongue was burnt into an extended position while its legs were still wriggling. It's going to haunt [[@/{{Bisected8}} me]] for years. ** Oh god, I'm so sorry. That's awful. Please note that I'm not making fun of you. ** Sorry, but why would you even do that? ** Instinct, probably. It's human nature by now to swing at flies as soon as you hear them, and if you forgot you had the blowtorch in your hand... * I did something like that with a wasp and a lighter, only, in my case the flame hit the abdomen of the wasp. The wasp immediately fell on the floor and I saw it twisting around and ''desperately rubbing its abdomen with its front legs!'' ** I don't see anything wrong with this. Wasps are terrible creatures and I would not be sad to see them all die horribly. Perhaps I'm biased though. ** Actually, wasps eat pest insects like mosquitoes, flies, etc... The sting is a pain in the ass, of course, but... * I once got a "memory book" and got everyone to write in it. I didn't like dad's entry so I erased it. He died. It's the only one I care about now. I'm sorry, dad. ** Awwww... I am so so so sorry, for you. You just made me cry. I wanna give you a hug. *** It's okay. I found some articles of mail he wrote to mum *coughloveletterscough*. Thanks for the sweetness, though <3 I now believe there are nice people on the internet. * This was my reaction when I was in one of my many wacky dreams. I was stuck like Lelouch with the overactive Geass and I yelled at a dear friend who I sometimes have fights with and we were in a shouting match. I shouted die, and you get the rest of the picture. It was very painful. * This troper was playing ''{{Bioshock}}'' one time: I had a hypnotized Big Daddy following me around, killing tons of enemies and generally being a great ally. At the end of a level where there were no more enemies to fight, I pulled out my electric gel thrower and electrocuted the Big Daddy to death to collect his money and items. It was right after I took his things that I stared at the corpse of what was once a great ally and thought all the adventures we had together, and the Little Sister I had taken away from him just to get him on my side. What have I done? ** You ended the suffering of a tortured individual cursed with a life

of brainwashed servitude after allowing him to help you clean up the once glorious city of Rapture. You did all you could for him. * ......[[{{Tropers/PancakeMix}} This Troper]] is a bit hesitant to add the most severe example so far, but here we go. My little brother and I got into a fight as siblings are prone to doing, especially since we were ages 10 and 12. I don't remember the details, it's been many years, but I recall the fight climaxing with me going completely berserk, pushing him onto the floor, jumping in the air, and slamming down on his ribs with knees. He let out a bloodcurdling SHRIEK OF AGONY. It was the most painful reaction I'd ever heard to anything to this day, and that snapped me out of my uncontrollable anger. He was crying, and all I could do was try to hug him afterwards, and he hit me, understandably, when I tried. I'd lost control of myself like that before and went Hulk on people before, but seeing that made me terrified of myself. ** I've hurt my little sister accidentally playfighting with her, too. YouAreNotAlone. *** Heck, when I was in fourth grade or so, I intentionally attempted to kill a classmate, in front of the class, by bludgeoning him with a heavy metal object. I missed and struck the cinder-block wall, taking off a huge chunk of one of the bricks. The school was crap and chose to ignore it, while I was left in shock for years knowing I was fully capable of taking a life for no good reason. I don't know if I missed subconsciously, or if I just had poor aim, but I don't think I'll ever forget the look of straight up terror in his eyes. I still think this trope to myself when I remember the incident. ** Dude, a while ago, I was chasing a friend, I lightly shoved her and she fell badly and ended up having to be taken to hospital with a fractured arm. I still blame myself, even though it was an accident. * This troper was playing golf and had some geese nearby him. Unfortunetly, when this troper hit, he hit terribly and it didn't go in the air. It hit the middle of a goose and caused some pain to it. He didn't die or anything, but he lost some feathers and was in some temporary pain (I a;lso could have sworn he flew away with one leg in the air, though he did not hit his leg...). This troper loves animals a ton too, which made it worse. * [[{{Tropers/TsundeRay}} This troper]] decided to put the formula for [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arc_length arc length]] in one of his {{Facebook}} status updates, in the style of one of his friends, who semi-randomly brings up the quadratic formula and mathematical laws and proofs in casual conversation. Big mistake; to this troper's noncomputer science, [[EverybodyHatesMathematics math-hating]] friends, it was a form of MindRape. He promptly deleted that status. Needless to say, NEVER AGAIN. * This Tropette had a moment like this. A kid had been harassing my friends for weeks, and would not stop. I'm a MamaBear if my friends are threatened, and I fianally snapped, grabbed him by the throat, and slammed him up against the wall, hissing, "If I hear that you have so much as LOOKED at one of my friends funny EVER again, I will break your neck." I dropped him and walked away. My brother later told me that the kid has Aspie's, and I went into HeroicBSOD mode, and felt awful. I have such poor impulse control, I'm terrified it'll happen

again. ** Considering that you did this after weeks of provocation, and didn't actually do anything more than scare him, it's hardly something to worry over. * This Troper got into a rather epic feud with a childhood friend after a string of events involving his drug problem, my general insomnia which, for a while there, turned me into a total zombie, and a girl who couldn't pick between us. It climaxed awfully with the gal deciding she couldn't bear us fighting anymore, so she left town. Friend became mad at me, tackled me and thanks to nothing but instinct I smashed a glass on his head. At this point we were so bitter I didn't even check to see if he was breathing or anything (God, I'm a jerkass) and I left to stay with my grandpa. During the week my grandpa asked about said friend. I said I hadn't seen him for ages. He said, "That's too bad. You were such good friends as kids. You were so close." Cue ''"MyGodWhatHaveIDone!!!"'' * This troper was once in a fight with her brother. Understand that said brother is very insecure when it comes to our mother and our relationship has always been strained because he was the baby of the family before I was born. I've forgotten what he'd said that made me so upset, but it made me go from screaming petty insults to an icy calm as I told him quietly that our mother had told me she loved me the best of her children. (This was a lie, of course.) Cue brother staring at me for a moment before turning around and walking away slowly. My mother set the record straight later but I never apologized for that simply because I didn't think it would make a difference and at this point we have an unspoken agreement to never bring up the event, but I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for that. * This Troper's ex had this after she lost it when a friend of hers texted her, telling her I fucked a girl I had "dated" (if you can call it that: I dumped her because it was going nowhere) years beforehand, while we were hanging out. She grabbed a bat and tried to beat me for two and a half minutes. I read the text at the same time as she did, so I just sat there. I blocked what I could, but she still managed to hit me a few times. She had a [[HeroicRROD BSOD]] moment when she, during her [[MyGodWhatHaveIDone What have I done]] moment, begged me through choked sobs if I would forgive her. I calmly told her I wasn't mad. ** [[AbuseIsOkayWhenItIsFemaleOnMale Of course you weren't.]] Thought experiment everyone: what would you think of a guy whose immediate reaction to the possibility of his girlfriend cheating on him (No confirmation, of course) is to beat her with a baseball bat? [[DoubleStandard I somehow doubt]] that many tropers wouldn't be mad at that guy. What would your advise to the girl in this hypothetical situation be? This Troper's would be to get out of there as soon as possible and call the police. Would any of you say that a guy who did that shouldn't be locked up? *** I consider it a ''very'' bad idea to escalate personal disputes to the level of police involvement and prison sentences unless absolutely necessary (as in, life-threatening situations), so since nobody seems to have been seriously hurt and the victim wasn't mad, I would advise them to just stick together, regardless of gender combination, and

maybe work on some of the attacker's anger issues and overemotional reactions so this doesn't happen again. I fully agree that the double standard is disturbing, but whereas you seem to want to move it in the direction of making all physical altercations be regarded as seriously as they are in the male-on-female scenarios, I support the opposite; taking physical altercations as lightly as they are seen in the female-on-male scenarios. **** If someone is beating someone else with a baseball bat nonconsentually, then whatever the relationship between the two people are, whatever the gender combination is, even if the victim is able to forgive and forget, the police need to be involved, and the attacker needs to be jailed. Someone capable of doing that in a fit of anger is a danger to the people they associate with, and their next victim might not be as lucky as to endure without major injuries. Preventing that sort of thing is what the police are there for, more than anything else. * This Troper confessed to the girl I liked, and like many others before me got "Let's just be friends." This was the first girl I had ever confessed to, so I took it rather hard. I was definitely not ready for the amount of anger that I felt. After a few months of pentup rage, a hurt ego, and general butt-hurtness, I snapped at her out of nowhere. I yelled that I hated her and wanted to physically hurt her. Cue this trope, a broken friendship, and years of self-loathing. I don't think she's forgiven me. * I was walking down the street when I saw a twisted yellow straw. I stepped on it without thinking much about it. Then I realized it wasn't a straw, but a poor yellow praying mantis... * [[MmmKay This troper]] had this feeling one time when I thought it would be a funny idea to [[FusionDance morph]] my favorite {{Face}} ('''Scott Tracy''' of ''{{Thunderbirds}}'') with my favorite {{Heel}} ('''Aran Ryan''' of ''[=~Punch-Out!!~=]''). He [[strike:could]] [[strike:would]] should [--(kinda, [[ChaoticNeutral if you think about it]])--] be an AntiHero type, or at least a MagnificentBastard, but several minutes later... ''[[NightmareFuel I got scared.]]'' I produced [[TranquilFury a more]] ''[[TranquilFury quiet]]'' [[TranquilFury madman]], complete with a PsychoticSmile and [[DeathGlare eyes that pierced through your soul]]. [[DevilInPlainSight The charming sociopath]]... '''''By God...''''' ** ... Translation, please? None of that paragraph made a fucking lick of sense. *** Seconded. I have no clue what you're talking about. * In a CodeGeass RP this troper is playing in, [[EmoTeen Jason Amver]] just finished using his new and improved Knightmare called the Destiny Edge to defeat his enemy, [[TheAce Kyle Tsuyoishi]], who he honestly believed was responsible for the death of his parents, and who was in the way of Jason's attempt to "choose mankind's destiny". After impaling Kyle's Seiryu with a BFS, he confronted a badly burned Kyle on the ground and delivered a scathing TheReasonYouSuckSpeech roughly mixed with a HannibalLecture. -->Jason: You do not believe in anything but your self righteous fight to free the Japanese, there is nothing in there for the people you hurt while doing so. That is why I won. I fought for my parents...who

you murdered. My reason for fighting, though, has evolved, too. Now I fight for mankind's destiny, something a short sighted brute like you could never understand. Sit there and burn, Kyle Tsuyoishi. ** After doing this, Jason realized he had gone a little too far when Kyle broke down, and had to be carried away by the BigBad/BigGood 's forces to a mental facility. Even Mellura thought he had accidentally stepped "into the abyss of a terrible deed." * This is a bit different since it wasn't intentional. I was driving down a street and saw a cute little squirrel in the middle of the street. As I got closer the little guy wouldn't move, so I went to hit the brakes. Instead of the brakes, though, I hit the gas and sped towards the furry little guy (don't worry, it escaped). While driving I am one with the car, so I know I didn't accidentally hit the gas (meaning my inner self is a psycho squirrel chaser). The next few minutes were filled with me just saying "Dude, what the fuck just happened!?!". * This Troper's friend has had this a lot; he used to be a very angry person, and would just lose it at people. Now he is a lot better but when he sleepwalks he is an awful, foul mouthed and violent person. He threatened to kill someone that we know, and woke up not remembering anything. He was very upset when he heard about it, as he is a very gentle person who doesnt even hurt insects. * This Troper ripped off a friend's character a few times without fully realizing what I was doing. She got upset at me and now it's very likely that I've lost her friendship. She was a good friend and I essentially betrayed her. You can bet I'm thinking this. * This troper taped over a recording of her at a singing recital when she was 9 because she was so embarrassed of how ugly she looked. Her grandmother had never seen said recording and it was one of the most precious things to her mother's heart--I guess I just care way more about my own selfish vanity than the feelings of the people who love me. >:| *facepalm* ** If it makes you feel any better, when I was about 10, I ripped my mother's favorite picture of me because my friends who were over kept making fun of it. I regret it to this day. * This Troper, when she was young, once blamed her younger brother for breaking her grandmother's favorite drinking glass. Said grandmother then proceeded to beat her younger brother with a hanger. He's forgotten about it now, but his cries of agony still haunt me today. * This Troper showed off at a party. Originally, it was just goofing around, then it turned into a horrendously misguided attempt to impress her crush. (It backfired...horribly. This troper now thinks he's still disgusted with her years later!) Not only did it annoy him, it very likely ruined the party. This troper still beats herself up inside for it years later; her Inner Catholic won't let her drop the guilt and shame. * [[{{Tropers/ICantThinkOfAWittyName}} I]] was on the receiving end of one of these. I play-punched my sister on the shoulder, but due to not knowing how much pressure I'm putting into a punch and no hand-eye coordination, I hit her in the neck and clipped her face a [[{{Understatement}} little bit]] too hard. She cried out "My face! ow!" My mother yelled at me for four minutes and then told me to go

see my father. He thought I'd backhanded my sister, so he did the same to me. I was '''eight.''' It hurt ''a lot''. When my mother told him it was an accident and I'd only clipped her face, he undeniably got a MyGodWhatHaveIDone moment--his face showed it. He didn't really apologize though, and I still haven't forgiven him seven, eight years later. * Just last week when this troper was backing up his car to go to the store, something stopped his tire. I pulled back in figuring I'd find a bicycle or something but instead saw what I was almost certain was my brother's cat darting off. I looked around everywhere but couldn't find him and my brother didn't become too worried about it until the next day. We both went looking and unfortunately ended up finding him underneath an abandoned trailer, dead. My brother immediately broke down in tears. The worst part is I understand how rigor mortis works and know that he suffered a very long time before he finally passed. Everybody assures me of course something must have been wrong with him for him to simply lay under my tire like that but it really doesn't do a thing for my guilt. * This troper is planning a story where a young girl is forcibly recruited into an army to fight against demons. Her recruiter, an angel, explains that she was chosen because they knew she was strong enough to kill the demons rather than letting them go when they beg for mercy. However, the girl breaks down every time she kills a demon because they disguise themselves as people- people she ''knew'', like a substitute teacher and a new friend of a friend. She ends up trying to quit the war several times because ItNeverGetsAnyEasier and constantly questions her morality and alignment until it gets personal. * This troper has done this several times of late. Once when she ended up being enough of a JerkAss to cause her (now-ex)girlfriend to break up with her. Again when she made a ton of friends before going away to college essentially abandoning them and damning herself to isolation. And most recently a few hours ago since she couldn't help one of her few new friends and should have been more observant about how they were feeling... * Ten years ago this troper's then-girlfriend lied to him about being on birth control in order to create a trap baby. Upon finding out she was pregnant, I...well...kind of did some things I regret. As in threats of violence (against her and the child-to-be), painting bleak scenarios of her as a single mother on welfare with her man nowhere to be found, and just generally using extreme measures to convince her that a trap baby was a VERY bad idea. Well...the look on her face after we walked out of that abortion clinic...my gods, what have I done? I still think it was the right decision given the circumstances, but this does not stop me from regarding myself as a CompleteMonster. ** I don't think you're a Complete Monster. It was in the heat of the moment, and she had no right to trap you with a baby. It's unfair to the both of you, and you had every reason to be upset. * I've repented a lot, but so far the most annoying (and funny) has been this: I'm a Beatles fan, and one day decided to let my mom listen to their music, hoping to convert her and be fans the two of us. What did I get instead? FanDumb. She doesn't even speaks english (and is

not planning to learn it any time soon), and is always "I want to hear them! Let's buy more discs of them! I love Paul, he's my favorite!". What have I done indeed. * When this troper was six she was playing in her room with her hamster. I dropped him and was amused at how he didn't seem at all hurt by the fall. So I continued to pick him up and drop him from higher heights until about the fifth time I did it and he didn't land on his feet, ''shuddered'' in pain and crawled on just two of his paws towards his cage. I think that was when it actually hit me that animals do feel and aren't just toys, as I broke down in tears of guilt, put him gently back in his cage and ran to tell my mum what I'd done. Fourteen years on and I still haven't forgiven myself and can't even bring myself to hurt a spider, no matter how much they terrify me. * This troper was so focused on internally raging about mowing the lawn in the cold rain that he didn't observe his surroundings. Ran over a clump of brown on the riding mower without a second thought. On my second pass, I discovered a young rabbit thrashing about with its head caved in. Considering I had previously nursed an abandoned nest back to heath, and am a massive animal lover, I let loose with this trope. * Circa 2002, [[@/PentiumMMX2 This troper]] was taking part in a weeklong event at his church; which, unfortunately, started going downhill toward the end of the week. Although I had been having problems with bullies all week long, I made it through with support from a friend I had made earlier in the week...until, on the final day, he had a FaceHeelTurn and joined the bullies; using everything he had learned about me over the week to make me as miserable as possible. Trying to keep my anger of being betrayed by someone I trusted under control, I went with our group outside for snow cones...and an innocent kid happened to cut in line in front of me; claiming he was there first. I was already at the boiling point over what hat happened earlier with that "friend", and something as stupid and trivial as who got there first was the WaferThinMint that pushed me over the edge, causing me to unleash my fury upon that defenseless kid; actually enjoying it, I might add, as I felt I was finally getting an opportunity to strike back against those who have made my life hell. After having the fight broken up by a volunteer, I came to my senses; realizing that, while I was blinded by my rage, I became a bully...I was no better than ''them'' for what I did. After that realization, my only thought was "What have I done?"; as I fled from the scene, needing some time alone to recover emotionally over what I did * And now, for a {{lighter and softer}} version of the trope: On a forum I frequent, I made a "random thoughts thread". One of the conversations went as follows: --> '''Poster 1:''' I could see this post being the 4chan of MSE lol --> '''Poster 2:''' You know, Cizzle, any more relevant comments like that, and there may be sage in every field.... and we don't want that... Though i wouldn't be surprised if someone came along and edited the name of the thread to /b/ --> '''Me:''' [[MyGodWhatHaveIDone Oh god.... What have I done?]] What horrors have I unleashed upon MSE? '''''WHAT HAS'''''

[[MagicTheGathering (Izzet)]] '''''SCIENCE DONE?!!''''' * When [[@/SoWeAteThem I]] was 15, I got the dog hit by a truck. My mother was a wreck. Even with the help I got taking her to the vet, nobody was completely sure she wouldn't warrant a MercyKill. I spent from an hour after 'till early the next day mired mired in guilt bout killing the dog. She got better, but even today, I still think about how stupid I was. * This was my reaction after I washed a tiny spider down the drain a while ago. To elaborate: I sat there, bawling in the bathroom, for about an hour wishing I could undo what I did. * This was, apparently, the response [[Chazz this troper]] SHOULD have had when he got into a fight in 8th grade, at least judging by the faculty's reaction. The fact that the other participant was the vice principal's son probably helped; none of them cared that, at the time, he was 6 inches taller than me, nearly 50 pounds heavier than me, and had jumped me from behind and started outright choking me without provocation. Yes, I back-kicked his knee and tried to slam him into a wall, but again, I was ''unable to breathe'' at the time because of his arm around my neck. When his father saw us, we both got detention (because, after all, "fighting back is as bad as fighting"). We were supposed to serve the detention the next day in the father's office... He wasn't there. Neither was the son. Meaning I got to sit there, alone, for 45 minutes until my mother arrived to pick me up. She quite nearly burned the school down when she heard from the office staff "Oh, I'm sorry, they had another appointment come up and couldn't make it, you were supposed to be told that it was rescheduled." I never went to the other one - YES they actually expected me to serve ''another'' detention because I wasn't told not to show up to the first one - I never apologized, and I never forgave either one, especially since ''I'' never received an apology either. * Happens to this Troper '''[[ThisIsSparta all. The. Damn. TIME.]]''' I ALWAYS end up hurting someone because I don't know how to handle a situation. Let's just say it usually has to do with emotional problems, leading girls on, flirting with them, hurting them unintentionally... I also tend to have an extremely overbearing guilt complex. I just suffered a {{Heroic BSOD}} to an otherwise pretty great day over something that happened today. I made one of my best friends feel bad (I'd rather not say the story... let's just say it wasn't pleasant... it had to do with our feelings about each other.) over something serious. She looked a bit depressed after that, which in turn, made me a bit depressed too. It leads to me saying this trope during my {{Heroic BSOD}}. Sat down in the kitchen contemplating the whole ordeal for twenty minutes. What have I done... * Stated by a friend of this troper during an RP, when said friend's character accidentally destroyed the AI we were in and unleashed a decidedly malevolent replacement. Currently, it MakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext. * This Troper had a bad mouse problem one winter, so I set up some glue traps. A few days later, there was a mouse trapped in one. He was still alive, and he'd dislocated all four of his legs trying to get out and could do nothing but just sit there and squeak in pain. I had to put him out of his misery, and then I never used a glue trap ever

again. ---How could you come here to read everyone's tales of misery? Go back to MyGodWhatHaveIDone and repent! ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MyGreatestFailure * I wasn't there. ** ...oh God. * For [[{{Tropers/Crion87}} this troper]], having given in to temptation from a 30-year old woman who wanted him, thus cheating on what was his girlfriend then. It is something for [[{{Tropers/Crion87}} this troper]] as being a non-lethal but just as big a MyGreatestFailure as [[{{Film/Outlander}} Kainan]] having lost his family at the hands of the Moorwen. Even if the girl he cheated on forgave him and tried to rebound, there was too much guilt for [[{{Tropers/Crion87}} this troper]] to feel. * I won't say what it was, but I have my own such failure. And for years, everyone (including the victim) has told me that it wasn't my fault, and I wouldn't have been able to do anything. Rationally, I know they're all correct. But deep down, I can't believe it - maybe because I know that, no matter how impossible it may have been, I'll never be as good as I hoped I could be. The rational mind sees no chance for success. The heart sees its greatest failure. * While I know I'm a fairly good, rational person today, and I have no idea what I'd be like if I hadn't considering how irrational and bitchy I was, I still wish I hadn't overreacted. * I went into a situation that I knew I could not win, despite knowing that it would hurt others. I was too proud. They paid the cost, [[SarcasmMode but at least my pride is intact]]. * Dropping out is the worst mistake i made. the classes in school aren't very useful per se, but the resources that were at my disposal if i had actually applied myself in school. Those are what I miss the most. everything else isn't currently biting me in the arse at the moment so i don't worry about it. ---Return, head hung in shame, to MyGreatestFailure. Really, you did your best.

MyHeroZero * My father has a 160 IQ and all sorts of high school sports trophies. He was also in a band, albeit a mediocre one. His name? [[GratuitousJapanese Ray]]. (No, I'm not Japanese.) ---Return to MyHeroZero because nothing is still something.

MyHovercraftIsFullOfEels * This troper's father is Vietnamese. He used to work with a pretty

Vietnamese girl who wore tight jeans to emphasize her...assets. A friend of his asked him to compliment her on her buttocks in Vietnamese. He told him how to say, "You have a round butt." The friend mixed the word for "round" with the word for "buffalo." They didn't hit it off. * "Puedo ir Diablo?" And the teacher did. not. notice. ** For non-Spanish speaking tropers: That sentence means "Can I go devil?". What that troper was probably trying to say was "Puedo ir al bao?" which means "May I go to the bathroom?" * This troper managed to muddle up the past participles of "schiessen" and "scheissen" in a German class. She has never lived down the interesting weekend when she shat three goals in a football match. * During this troper's first year of Spanish (6th grade), he managed to mangle "conejo" (bunny) into a vulgarity that caused the few fluent students to collapse with laughter and made the teacher flush bright red. ** That doesn't require any mangling. "Conejo" can be used as a euphemism for CountryMatters, much like "pussy" (as in "cat") is in English. * This troper's father once attended a dinner party with some French friends and when asked if he wanted more food, attempted to reply "No thanks, I'm full", in French. Unfortunately when directly translated into French, this phrase means something along the lines of: "No thanks, I'm pregnant." ** This troper's French teacher went through exactly the same situation. ** This troper's Spanish teacher did something similar, thinking embarazada met "embarrassed". It means [[MisterSeahorse pregnant]]. ** ...Do we have the same teacher? * In a French class paired assignment, one of this troper's friends misread his partner's handwriting and instead of saying "''J'ai perdu mon ami''" (I've lost my friend), he said "''J'ai pendu mon ami''" (I've ''hanged'' my friend). Several of the more advanced students in the class cracked up, and the teacher himself was fighting the urge as he explained that what had been said was likely to get the speaker arrested. * This troper's Latin ''teacher'' once meant to write on the dry erase board that there was going to be a test (''examinem''), while a sharp student noticed that in fact she had written ''exanimatus'', unconscious. [[HilarityEnsues Much humor was had.]] ** For a moment there, I thought you said she had written "[[WarHammer40000 Exterminatus]]". * This troper has a brother who due to a speech impediment can't say "This food tastes delicious." in German, it comes out as "This food tastes like shit." ** Ktzlich ? *** Mistaken for Kacklich? **** Kstlich = Delicious, "ktzlich" = "barfalicious" ** English, Excellent = Deutsch, Ausgezeichnet. My German 101 instructor pointed out an obvious slipup: ausgescheissnet. In that case, means that it's not excellent, it's excrement. * This troper once wrote what he thought was "Emma plays with the

dog." in Italian. Due to a misspelling, it came out as "Emma plays with meat." which has all sorts of delightful meanings if you think about it. * In this troper's high school Russian class he has to be careful when pronouncing the word for mother, &#1084;&#1072;&#1090;&#1100;, because without the &#1100; on the end, it's pronunciation is adjusted ever so slightly. After that ''slight'' change, it now means cussing, more specifically of the varieties involving copulation with one's mother. He almost got slapped by a foreign exchange student from St. Petersburg for that mistake. * This troper's mother once chaperoned a school trip to France, and although she made a commendable effort to learn French before going, she still managed, at a restaurant, to turn "We need a knife" into "We are a bakery." ** "Nous avons besoin d'un couteau" to "nous sommes un * bakery* "? How? *** "Nous avons besoin d'un couteau" to "Nous sommes une ptisserie"? This french canadian troper just has to know. *** Possibly some relation between "besoin" and "boulangerie"? * This troper recalls a friend mentioning having eaten some Arroz Con Perro (instead of Arroz Con Pollo). The latter is rice with chicken, but the former would be [[EatTheDog a meal of an altogether different kind]]. * Inversion: This troper's latin teacher thought his entire class had a case of this. As part of the quiz, we were asked to translate different quote's from StarWars, one of which being "You are part of the Rebel alliance and a traitor. Take her away". However, everyone translated it "You are part of the rebel alliance and a trader. Take her away." He didn't realize until we pointed it out that we translated it correctly, but he had made a typo. * In this troper's French 2 class, there was one guy who always managed to do this. He once turned the conjugation of the verb "to make/do" into... a word referring to one's rear end. He also managed, while reciting a poem, to say "he has a hat in his head" instead of "on his head." Amazingly, while giving a presentation in the first person on a famous historical figure, he turned the name of the person's second wife into the phrase "Twelve Armenian women." ** * blinks* What was the name of the wife in question? * This troper once perpetrated this in Xhosa - also an inflected language. Apparently "Ndi libele" ("I forgot"), when improperly inflected means "I am a breast". ** Another example involving a South African language: this time, Afrikaans. A lot of the time when people write "Horskool", the forget that very important umlaut over the e, writing it as "Hoerskool" instead. That changes the meaning of the word from "High School" to "Whore School"... * This troper once accidentally put "baignoire" instead of "banlieu" on a French exam. The question was "Ou habitez-vous?" ... * ThisTroper's parents are both fencers, and when her mother would miss, she would hiss under her breath, "''missed''" to avoid swearing. Unfortunately, when they moved to Germany, she found out that it sounded suspiciously like "Mist", which is one of the German words for

"shit." * When This Troper was in Japan I fell in with a fellow countryman he met there and went looking for a bar. I shouldn't have let him ask for directions because he kept saying "doku" (poison) instead of "doko" (where). I noticed a lot of the people we asked were giving him funny looks. On a more personal note, I was once half-way through a Japanese speaking practical before I realised I'd got "otouto" (younger brother) mixed up with "imouto" (younger sister) and had spent the last 2 minutes telling my tutor about a little sister I did not, in fact, have. ** Similarly, This Troper was in a Japanese class with a French guy who had trouble pronouncing his H's. One time, he attempted to say "hashi de taberu" (I eat with chopsticks) and it came out "ashi de taberu" (I eat with my feet). * This troper's aunt once spent several minutes explaining to a French drugstore owner that she had been bitten by a handkerchief (in actual fact, she'd been nommed on by a horsefly - mouche: fly, mouchoir: handkerchief). This troper's father also once told a French farmer that the horse in the field over the road was being bothered by seagulls when he also meant flies. Doubly bizarre seeing as this troper's father is a teacher who's been teaching French for about twenty years. Ah well...I guess we all make mistakes * This troper once went to a french part of Switzerland, and wanted to know where the train station. He asked "Ou est la guerre?" which means "where is the war?" instead of "Ou est la gare?" which means "where is the train station?" Switzerland has remained neutral for centuries. * A friend of a friend of this troper once went to China. In a clothes shop, she wanted to say "I need a shirt for my husband" but mispronounced the word for "husband" in a way that turned it into the word "dwarf." Small shirts were brought out and she was left there saying "My dwarf is bigger" over and over. * This troper, in an Italian test in primary school, wrote what he intended to be 'Emma plays with the dog'. Unfortunately, the word for dog is very similiar to the word for meat. What he ended up writing was 'Emma plays with meat', the DoubleEntendre potential he has only just noticed. ** * scratches head* This troper remembers reading practically this exact same story about 6 bullets down from the top. * A guy in this troper's German class once mixed up the words "Student" and "Stunde" and announced that he works fifteen (male) students per week. * This Troper mows the flowers rather than the lawn. * This Troper attempted to say "I Love You" in Korean going off of memory rather than a phrase book. He wound up saying "I am buying you." ** Further adventures in Korean malapropisms: [[FishStampede This Troper]] turned in some homework where he stated "My father is a stop sign." *** This troper had a similar misadventure in Spanish. Instead of "His father is ill," she wrote, "His potato is ill." * This Troper was an foreign exchange student in a German-language class with at a German university once, reviewing modal verbs by

filling in captions to pictures. One picture showed two men having a duel. One very sweet, shy student said, instead of "Er soll nicht schiessen" (He should not shoot), said "Er soll nicht scheissen" (He should not shit). The entire class erupted into laughter; the teacher giggled nervously and said "Well, he shouldn't do that, either..." * This Troper's stepmom once attempted to say "I am a vegetarian" in sign language and actually said "I am a vegetable." * Someone who studied Japanese with [[fidheallir This Troper]] tried to describe his outfit as "pants and a t-shirt" (tishyatsu to surakusu). Unfortunately, the person used the word "pantsu", which means underwear. [[HilarityEnsues Hilarity Ensued]]. The same person also made the mistake of using the word "neru" (sleep) instead of nap ("hirune o suru) when he suggested that our class have naptime. He ended up propositioning the entire room. * It was intentional, but this troper's cousin once told a group of Spanish-speaking construction workers he was working with "No tengo los zapatos locos," while pointing at his watch and then at the sky. The phrase means "I do not have the crazy shoes." It was a very effective ice breaker. * In a trip to this editor's spanish-speaking country, his wife, wanting to compliment his aunt's collection of porcelain owls, stated that she liked those "tiny lettuces". * This troper remembers some years ago having a story told to him by his middle-school french teacher. He relayed a tale of a friend of his who was visiting his relatives, who spoke french. He was not fluent, so when attempting to say "My legs are Freezing," just put a french pronunciation on 'freezing.' As a result, he said 'fris,' and thus 'The hair on my legs has been curled.' * A friend of This Troper, while reading a Latin passage aloud, translated "the farmer approached and grabbed the boy" as "the farmer approached and raped the boy." In his defense, the word for grab is "rapio." * A well-known story from this troper's high school Indonesian teacher: she was at a dinner with other Indonesian teachers where everyone was to speak entirely in Indonesian. When offered food, she went to say 'maaf, saya kenyang' (I am full) but instead produced 'saya kencing' (I am peeing)...Hilarity Ensued. * This Troper was able to get a friend with T embarasadas? after he had tripped over a bed with everyone in the room. After he affirmed that he was "embarrassed", This Troper told the group that it meant pregnant. The group cracked up, even more when he agreed to that as well. ** A similar incident happened to my Spanish teacher's sister once when she was late to a meeting. When she arrived, she meant to say she was embarrased. Instead, she told the group that she was "embarasada", or pregnant. * This editor's third-and-fourth grade Mandarin teacher, when travelling in China, meant to compliment the mayor's (or whatever passes for mayor there) wife's dress... and accidentally told her that she had a lovely ''eggplant''. Much hilarity ensued. * [[{{Tovarishch}} This spanish-speaking troper]] remembers a French class he had on High School, where one of his classmates once read a

sentence written as "J'aime ma mre" (I love my mother) as if it was written as "J'aime ma merde" (I love my shit). The teacher, who had [[GrammarNazi little patience]] on such kind of mispronounciations, [[BerserkButton raged.]] EDIT: Some other jewels were mentioned, like "I drive my vulture" instead of "I drive my car" (Je conduis ma vautour / Je conduis ma voiture) and "The assholes flew" instead of "The ducks flew". (Les connards a vol / Les canards a vol) * A friend of a friend went to China and thought he had been telling people that he wanted to see a panda bear. What he was actually saying was that he wanted to "see a breast hair". * Ah, the joy of idioms. This troper once knew a native French speaker who mixed up "I have a cold" and "I am feeling under the weather" and told this perplexed troper "I have the weather." He also went to the post office once and requested "a package of timbers, please". (The French for stamps is "timbres".) * This troper's French teacher translated "I kissed my friend" into French as "I fucked my friend" due to a semantic drift that had occurred since he learned French, much to the amusement of the teaching assistant and many of the class. * [[{{Kaizykat}} This troper's]] Spanish II class was infamous with these. Considering that the entire class was made up with kids who had never heard actual Spanish spoken by a native speaker before and had no idea what they were doing, mispronunciations were common. A few gems were substituting ''cago'' (I shit, roughly) for ''caigo'' (I fall), ''el peine'' (the comb) became ''el pene'' (the penis), and ''la mama'' (the breast) for ''la mam'' (the mom). * This troper's teacher once asked the class for various ways to ask someones name. However, after the class had use all the ones we had learnt, I attempted to combine "Wer ist das?" (Who is that?) and "Wie heit du?" (How are you called?) as "Wie heit das?" (How do you call that?) which eveidently means something very bad. ** Holy cow, what does it mean? If you're right, then [[@/{{Amethystasheryn}} my]] German teacher knows nothing about it and has been letting classmates of mine say it with no comment passed. Then again, she isn't the greatest teacher, so ... * This troper was visiting a garden in Tokyo, after which I was to meet a local friend at a train station. I kept asking locals, in passable Japanese, where Hamach Station was, and people kept telling me it was clear across town. I tracked down a pay phone and called my friend to ask him why he picked a station so far away, and he kept insisting it was right next to me. It turns out he was right, but the station was called Hamamatsuch, and apparently pronounced very fast, with no cadence between syllables. But then again, I had the same problem in London, looking in vain on the map for Tutnam until someone pointed out Tottenham. * An American FOAF was on a business trip in Japan, at the bar after work. They were talking about South Park, and the American did his Timmy impression, and the bar fell quiet. Turns out [[JapanesePronouns "Tem"]] is the kind of word that, in a bar, usually precedes a brawl. * Not too long ago, a friend of mine showed me a pencil pouch from Japan, which read "POP'n Friends". The placement of the apostrophe

made the second "P" look like an "R," changing the phrase to "''PORN'' Friends." We still don't know what "POP'n Friends" actually means. * On a forum, spammers are a problem. However, as the following text shows, they can also be rather funny. -->Hi! Boomerang klooper extract over in preference of my english jer, buti faithfully keen re articulate * This troper, when speaking Spanish, always seemed to confuse ''dlar'' with ''dolor'': the first is dollar, the second is pain. "I wish that I had 1,000,000 pains." * This troper had an amusing experience involving a three way language mix-up on a school sponsored trip to Italy. Only a few of us spoke Italian (this troper was not one of them) and we felt it behooved us to at least ''attempt'' to meet the Italians halfway rather than assuming they all spoke English. So the rest of us tried to get along with whatever rudimentary Spanish we knew. It actually worked pretty well for the most part, until we were in Venice and I tried to ask for a ferry ticket. To this day I can't recall exactly what it was I said to this poor woman operating the ticket counter, but I do remember she stopped me in mid-sentence and asked me "Do you speak English?" * This troper's grandmother, being from Vienna, didn't speak very good Hungarian. She once wanted to order "borsos marhatokny" (a common Hungarian meat dish) in a restaurant but ended up ordering "borsos marhatakony", which would be "peppered cattle snot". On another occasion, they were going to a shop, and she yelled across the street to her daughter: "be van szarva" (he/she/it has shat itself) instead of "be van zrva" (it's closed). She also had a habit of saying "kilincs" (doorhandle) instead of "kincs" (treasure). * This troper once heard a rather tragic story of a deaf couple who were shot dead because a local gangbanger mistook their sign language for the hand sign of a rival gang. * Another example of repetition trouble comes from this tropers ASL class- while saying details about ourselves, a classmate tried to say "I've been married for one year" and ended up saying "I am a one yearold hamburger". [[HilarityEnsues Hilarity promptly ensued.]] * Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like? ** ''HUH?'' I'm sorry, I don't know how to get rid of eels... *** [[ImageBoards I didn't know retardese was a language.]] ** You've got to be kidding me. I've been further even more decided to use even go need to do look more as anyone can. Can you really be far even as decided half as much to use go wish for that? My guess is that when one really been far even as decided once to use even go want, it is then that he has really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like. It's just common sense. ** [[http://images.blippitt.com/wpcontent/uploads/2010/07/Harbfeadtuegwtdlml_4chan.jpg Clarification for those out of the loop.]] * In French class, I was writing an assignment about a recent vacation. I was at the section where I had to describe my favourite meal I had there. I asked the teacher what "turkey" was in French. Unfortunately he thought I was asking how to describe my destination, and I ended up saying I had Turkey (the country) for dinner.

** Well, so much for my plans to visit the Hagia Sophia one day. I hope it was tasty. Jerk. ** Your next meal could just as easily be people from Denmark. Don't forget to tell us which tastes better when you're through! * One day I ended up chatting online with someone who was evidently using babelfish or some other automated translator to aid her in speaking English. At one point she was trying to apologize for not speaking English very well, but what she actually said was "Sorry my Englishman is small". * Hindi has four t-sounds and four d-sounds (to be technical: contrasting ''retroflex/dental'' and ''aspirated/unaspirated''). This European troper made his Indian sisters-in-law crack up with laughter when he referred to their pet parrot ''(tota)'' as a "misanthrope" by placing the tip of the tongue in the wrong place. * [[SacredSturgeon This Dutch-speaking Troper]] once tried to mention a cat being yellow in German, only I couldn't remember what the German word for yellow was. Since a lot of the time, Dutch words are very similar to German, I figure I'd just try and use the Dutch word for yellow ("geel") and change it around a bit to make it sound more German it in the hope I'd get it right. I ended up calling the cat horny ("geil"). Oops. Doubly bad because the Dutch word for horny is also "geil" (albeit with a tiny difference in pronunciation). On the bright side, I will never forget that the German word for "yellow" is "Gelbe". * A fairly mild version of this: When this troper was taking a Japanese oral exam, she said, "watashi wa shukudai ga imasu," which is, "I have homework." However, "imasu" is used for living things. So this troper implied that her homework was alive. (She should've said, "watashi wa shukudai ga arimasu.") ** To help further your Japanese skills, "watashi wa" is unnecessary in that situation. "Shukudai ga arimasu" is what would normally be said. * Our French teacher's toy seal Monsieur Phoque was very popular with this troper's high school French class. * This troper once ended up insisting to her Spanish partner that she had attended her girlfriend's wedding when she was a child. It wasn't until after the lesson she realized that she had mixed up the word ''prima'' (cousin) with ''novia'' (lover). * A few years ago, one of this troper's college professors began taking Russian classes, as she planned to visit her daughter who worked as a member of the Peace Corps in Kazakhstan. In one of her classes, she said something, causing her teacher to break down in hysterics. When she asked what she said, he told her that she had called him a briefcase. * An in-law of mine was at a restaurant in Mxico, and was trying to tell a waitress, "tengo hambre" (I'm hungry). Not knowing Spanish that well though, what he told her instead was, "quiero hombre" (I want a man). * In a particular Spanish class, this troper's class was asked by the instructor to name things our parents want us to do. This troper intended to say, "Mis padres insisten que yo no gaste tanto dinero," or "My parents insist that I not spend so much money." What she

''actually'' said was, "Mis padres insisten que yo no ''gane'' tanto dinero," or "My parents insist that I not ''make so much money.''" If ''only'' that were true... * On the first day of Japanese class, a friend accidentally said toomoimasu instead of tomoshimasu when introducing himself. That is, instead of politely saying "I am called [name]", he said "[name], I think." * As a result of this, the phrase "It is sinful to eat peaches while fishing" was a running joke in this troper's French class. * I'm a native English speaker living in Spain, so English as a foreign language classes uncover many gems. One I remember is someone trying to say that they had a cold... in Spanish, "estoy constipado". What he actually said is not hard to guess; it was difficult not to snigger. * This troper was in Italy with a youth theater group. For lunch we wanted to borrow a bread knife from a nearby restaurant, so a few people was send there with a travel parleur to try to communicate the request. They did come back with a knife, but told that the waiter they had talked to, seemed oddly amused at the request. We later found out that the (hot seventeen year old) girl had said "I'll give ass back" instead of "I'll give it back". * The US Government's Defense Language Institute was a virtual gold mine of these for Korean: ** One student, while trying to describe his house (jip) told the instructor that he had a two story vagina (sship.) ** A marine, after bring promoted to corporal (sang-byeong) was presented with a banner congratulating her on her venereal disease (seong-byeong.) * This troper is aware of two separate yet equally hilarious examples, involving two completely different people, one of whom (going to show that even ASL has dialects and that ''dialects matter'') was actually a ''professional translator'': ** In the first example, my friend, a slight novice at ASL, was trying to inform a deaf customer she met at work that she was trying to learn how to sign the lyrics to the song "Fireflies", by Owl City. She was perplexed when the woman laughed and responded, "Sounds FUN!". Apparently the difference between "Firefly" and "colorful/fiery orgasm" is that for "orgasm" is that instead of bringing your fingers down ''slowly'' on the second sign, you briefly twitch them; something my friend has an unfortunate and inexplicably instinctive tendency to do when attempting to sign the word for "bug"... ** And in the second (and by virtue of who it happened to, somewhat more hilarious) example, the translator was attempting to ask a little boy "What would you like for lunch?". Apparently in the Washington, DC area, however, the standard sign for "lunch" (which involves an "L" held up to the chin in a particular way) is not used for "lunch", but as slang for something completely... ahem, ''different''. Ironically, the little boy didn't pick up on this and knew exactly what she meant, but his ''mother'' got terribly indignant, and had to explain to the translator that "''You just asked him which lesbian he wanted!''". * This Troper's has a friend who travels alot and once while in a Tapa his other friend, who thought he was fluent in Spanish, ordered

something, this troper was never told what, and the waiter gives him a strange look before huddling with some other waiters, saying some stuff in spanish, and snickering. My friend, figuring something was wrong, asked in his very poor spanish if something was wrong with that food item. The waiter turned back and replied in almost perfect English, "Oh, there's nothing wrong with the food here. Your friend just happend to order a shaver for his meal." * This troper, while trying desperately to get directions to a public convenience in Osaka asked a local, "Toilet-wa, suki desu ka?". I somehow managed to confuse doko (where is?) with suki (Like), making the sentense "Do you like the toilet?" I didn't think Japanese people could laugh like that, at least not in public, and I very nearly ended up suddenly not needing the toilet anymore. ** Similarily, this troper confused the words for where (doko) and who (dare) and asked a group of Japanese people "Who is the toilet?" * This troper's middle school Chinese class had a lot of fun thinking up entertaining meanings for phonetic translations of current politicians' names. Among other things, we came up with Ao(4) ba(1) ma(3) for Obama, literally meaning "obscure dumb horse". * The Arabic word for "chair" is ''kursii''. The Arabic word for "my vagina" is ''kussii''. The difference between the two is harder to detect if someone does not roll their r's, as a soldier buddy of mine once discovered. * [In Japanese,] 'Shufu' means 'housewife' and 'sh&#333;fu' means 'prostitute'. Guess what a friend of mine said when asked if her mother had a job. * No, "water buffalo" is ''not'' slang for a thoughtless, rowdy person in English. That's why you don't translate slang literally. BTW, the thoughtless and rowdy sorority girls being addressed took it as a racial epithet. * In French, the past tense for "se taire" (to be quiet) is "s'est tue," which is dangerously close to "se tuer"(to kill oneself). [[@/SoWeAteThem My]] entire third year class unknowingly threatened suicide for a month. * [[Tropers/{{Nemica}} This troper]]'s father's still kinda famous for ordering Olivia's oil instead of olive oil in a restaurant in italy. ** "Olio di oliva" -> "Oilio di olivia". He never tried to order in Italian again. * My Chinese teacher uses examples to show us why tone is important. For instance, "Qing wen(4)" (''please tell me...'') will let you ask something, while "Qing wen(3)" (''Please kiss me'') will "make Chinese woman [[ArmorPiercingSlap slap you]]". Also, call your mother "mama(1)", not "mama(3)" (something vulgar). ** Of course, accents also cause trouble the other way. He couldn't figure out why people were laughing when he translated the word "bing(1)" until he actually wrote it on the board and people started saying, "Oh, ''ice''..." We were ''wondering'' why he gave us the word for "ass". * In an attempt to say that my pencil was missing its eraser in Chinese, [[{{Tropers/Epiblast}} I]] managed to produce the sentence "This thing on the end of my nose is too small". ("Nose" and "pencil" are similar words in Mandarin, and I didn't know how to say "eraser".)

** [[{{Tropers/Epiblast}} I]] have also seen these committed by other English speakers in an official context. I don't really speak Spanish, but I know enough vocabulary to recognize that the Spanish written below the English on a sign advertising vegetables indicated that ''vegetarians'' were for sale. * I've heard people mix up the german word "flasche" (bottle) with "fleisch" (meat). The result is usually hysterical. * This troper's French class had this as an exercise, combined with IHaveToGoIronMyDog: Someone asks you to do something ridiculous, and you have to answer something ridiculous you're too busy doing. For example, this troper said, "Je dois faire les achats sur Pluton." which translates to, "I have to go shopping on Pluto." * An old teacher of mine once told my class about when he and a friend of his had been on vacation to a country where they barely spoke the language. At one point my teacher tried to order two cups of coffee, but instead ended up requesting two hookers. * Apparently, [[Tropers/KatanaCat my]] dad got something wrong when he was teaching me German, if what I read is to be trusted... apparently, every summer, I used to say "I am very, very, ''very'' sexy" instead of saying I was the other kind of hot. * Embarrassingly TruthInTelevision for this Troper. Have your teacher ask you what you watched on TV yesterday. Answer PawnStars. In a Japanese accent. ** In my dialect (Australian English), 'pawn' and 'porn' are homonymous. If that is what you were talking about. * This troper was trying to say "I am tired" in Japanese (watashi wa nemui desu), but ended up saying "I am a mouse" (watashi wa nezumi desu). * Glauben Sie Meiner Enteklage. * In order to quickly translate a Swedish book into English, I scanned the pages and copied and pasted the scanned text into a translator. The [[http://translate.reference.com/ translation program]] itself is surprisingly accurate, the only problem is that the scanner recognizes the text as letters and puts it into a Word document but doesn't recognize the circles and umlauts over the letters , and and just transcribes them as a and o, respectively. The translator is even smart enough to (sometimes) figure out that a word was misspelled and translate it correctly anyway. The only major problem with this method arises when such misspellings produce actual words in Swedish. What was "dr man kan odla enklare grdor som rg" (where one can easily cultivate crops like rye) became "dar man kan odla enklare grodor som rag" (where you can grow more easily frogs that rag). * In this troper's French class, we had a competition for designing an advertisement for perfume. One kid put that it would make people want to kiss the perfume user. Unfortunately, he used the verb 'baiser'. While it does literally mean 'to kiss', contemporary slang use meant that his advertisement was...rather more convincing than he intended. * This Troper once was taking a pop quiz in French on vocabulary related to illness, medicine, and the human body. The quiz was fillin-the-blank sentences with a word bank, so she did okay up until the last 2 questions. She only had two words left, so she had to guess and hope for the best. She ended up saying that she drank crutches before

she went to bed each night. * This troper has a friend who speaks near perfect Spanish, apart from a (somewhat endearing tendency) to mix up the words "hambre" (hunger) "hombre" (man) and hombro (shoulder). Hilarity ensues. She still hasn't lived down "I have shoulders. What can I have to eat?" * Many years ago, this troper's father (who speaks little French) was in French Polynesia. Asked when he did for a living, he replied, "Je suis un avocat." As he was under the impression that he'd said he was a lawyer, he didn't understand why his listeners started laughing. Eventually they told him that what he'd actually said was "I am an avocado." To say "I am a lawyer", one would leave off the article and say, "Je suis avocat." * This troper was on the "confused local" side of this when a German military pilot and his wife came in to get his dog vaccinations. Rather than say, "My dog needs parvo and rabies vaccinations", he said "My dog needed parvo and rabies vacations". His (far more fluent) wife clarified the situation after relating what he actually said back to the husband. * This troper will never forget the one French lesson where she mixed up "poison" (self-explanatory) for "poisson" (Fish); I'm pretty sure that if I were Romeo, I would've regretted drinking a fish in order to commit suicide. * This troper is now a better language speaker, having got his grades up from C's to B's and A's. However, he asked what "nice" was in Spanish when his memory briefly lapsed (in context, he had to describe a teacher for a speaking assessment). He was told "Guapa" meant "nice" and subsequently was laughed at for a good minute or two when he discovered it meant "beautiful". I did get it sorted, thankfully. * This Troper has been living in China for the summer and occasionally makes tonal mistakes. When asked the reason why she came to live in China, she replied "I regret liking China" (hen, when said as hen2, is a general intensifier; when said as hen4, it means "regret" or "hate"). When trying to explain why she couldn't reach something she managed to say "I am too love" (ai3 means "short-statured"; ai4 means "love"). * This troper once wrote on a German quiz that a certain character was pretty, even though the story specifically stated that the man was hideously ugly. Subverted in that she actually ''did'' use the word she meant to use, just in the wrong context. She meant to say that the man was "nice," as in "he had a nice personality," but didn't realize that "schn," which literally translates to "nice," only refers to appearances, as in "he looks nice today." * [[@/{{Amethystasheryn}} My]] dad took German classes in high school and college. One of his teachers once told a story of a student who, in a report, said "Arbeitsanzug, habe ich Chocoladenkuchen am liebsten" instead of "beralles, habe ich Chocoladenkuchen am liebsten". The student meant to say "Overall, I like chocolate cake best" ... But the word "Arbeitsanzug" means "overalls" (Arbeit = work, Anzug = suit), not "overall". I suspect that, if the story is true, the student was cheating and using an online translater, but it's still funny. * Except for the occasional word I learn from someone actually fluent

in the language, I get all my non-English words from online translators which - as we all know - cannot be trusted. This led to an awkward moment, when I was trying to tell someone who spoke Spanish "How did you do [on that test]?" in Spanish. Don't ask how, but I asked him if he could DivideByZero. * Sort of stuck halfway between MyHovercraftIsFullOfEels and EmbarrassingTattoo, a longtime friend of this troper is a hardcore metalhead, loves the "kick-ass" film genre, which mostly encompasses strange Asian movies... and commonly uses the gaming username "Zaibatsu." [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zaibatsu I have no idea why]], but AsLongAsItSoundsForeign. ---[[{{MyHovercraftIsFullOfEels}} Go again to my air cushion vehicle are full with Aalen.]] ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MyNameIsNotDurwood * I'm Avery. Ayveree. Not like "'A very' nice day." And God help the next person to call me Aubrey... * This Tropers name. Is. NOT. I repeat. NOT. CHRISTINA. Or Christa for that matter. It's Regina. MY NAME IS NOT THAT DIFFICULT! </rant> * This Troper's name is Hunter. Apparently, people in Kentucky cannot pronounce a 't' that is in the middle of a word. Except for my family and about 3 other people, everyone calls me 'Hunner" >_< ** This troper has the same name and he pronounces it "Hunner" when speaking to someone that speaks American English. By saying my name once in England the person I was speaking to thought I said "Connor". ** Wait, if people in Ken'''t'''ucky [[YourHeadASplode can't pronounce a t in the middle of a word]]. *** Sounds a bit Canucky, perhaps they should move up north. * This troper's poor sophomore-year geometry teacher was always harassed by his students. The last joke that I remember is that since the rest of the students didn't know his real name, they all called him Durwood. I remember him actually telling them "My name is not Durwood." I've confirmed that is is, indeed, not Durwood. * My name is not Bonnie, even though a crazy old woman I delivers papers to insists on calling me. * Some of this editor's relatives have the last name "Cockburn." Pronounced "Coburn." Elementary school must have been hellish. ** This very pronunciation problem was lampshaded by at least one British TV commercial for Cockburn's Port. ** This troper knew a girl in middle school with that last name. Cut to her best snickering over 'what if my cat had that last name?' Her cats name was maiyha (pronounced my-uh) ** MIT's Lobby 10 (the central location in the school) has the name of "Richard Cockburn Maclaurin" carved into the wall. Yes, this troper has to resist the urge to snicker every time he passes it. * Due to all of her friends being unable to remember her name, [[{{Robbychu}} this troper]] was referred to as "Other Girl" for a

year and a half. Of course, given that everyone else also has a "Whoops, forgot your name" nickname, this isn't so strange. (The most notable are "Goth Girl" and "Quiet Girl") * This troper acquired a nickname that is a common girl's name completely unrelated to her own. When transferring to a new school, one of her classmates apparently believed that she had answered to this during roll call, when in fact there was no one with this name or any variations in the class. Due to this classmate spreading her new name around the school and convincing everyone else that she was joking when she told them her real name, this troper spent all four years of high school under another name, to the point that the name called at graduation shocked a few. * My name's. Not. ''Joan''. * [[{{Malimar}} This troper]] had two friends named Ryan in college. He dubbed one of them Diet Ryan and the other Ryan Classic, and both names stuck quite firmly. He really hopes they don't mind. * This troper is terrible with names, constantly forgetting them and avoiding using them if at all possible, settling with seeming rude by adressing people as 'Oi', or 'hey', and is on the verge of asking people at his new job to wear nametags for a week to get names straight. ** [[{{Seanette}} Another troper]], who does a good deal of temp work, tends to like workplaces with security badges because they double as nametags, since said troper is horrible at remembering names (not lack of desire/motivation, apparent processing/memory storage deficiency in her head). *** You mean [[ILikeCrows I'm]] not alone in this? I've taken to warn people about this so they'll know it's nothing personal. ** I, too, forget people's names frequently. Girls especially seem to be offended by this. * This troper had been called "Lynx" in primary, because a diminutive form of her name in her native tongue ends with the word "lynx" (also in her native language). Her usual reaction to being called this was to scratch the offender. * This troper has had his last name misspelled and mispronounced more times than he can count. The proper spelling is "Fuerth" (it's an Americanization of the Swedish "Furth"), but it's been spelled Firth, Furth (oddly enough), Feurth and ''Fuergh''. How in the HELL do you get ''Fuergh'' from Fuerth?! University dorm mates have also dubbed me "Captain Kirk". ** [[CorahsUncle Another troper]] has had the same problems. His surname is properly pronounced "'''Vye'''-pond". For his sister's wedding in 1993, the tag on his rented tuxedo read "Jim Upland". ** Oh don't get GracieLizzie started on this. Her surname is Bellerby, and it's prone to mispellings and mispronounciations. Some are understandable like Bellamy or Dellerby, but there are some really screwy ones - Bellereth, Bellabonce, Blurby. ** [[{{Andygal}} This troper's]] surname is "Digney", however people seem to have a hard time spelling it for some reason. When she was recently on a tour group in Peru, the guy picking her up at the airport carried a sign saying "Dagwert", which has to be the most creative misspelling ever. Fortunately the sign also had the name of

the tour company on it. ** Can I take a guess at the original question? The g key is right below the t key on a keyboard. If "Fuergh" was on a typed letter, it was probably just a typo. * This troper's mother's name is Erna. That's E-R-N-A. Not Emma, Ema, Irma, Erma, Verna, Vera, or (in one notorius mailing-list case) Grna. * A high-school friend's name was Chrysten, but was misread by a substitute teacher calling roll as "Chester." We all made ''sure'' that one stuck for the next three years. * This troper became so enraged at the constant mispronunciations of his last name (Armbruster rhymes with rooster!) that he's settled for slapping umlauts over the U and hoping for the best. * This troper's mother's first name is Pam, and her last name ends in -son. She's a teacher. Every year, someone in her classes misremembers her name as "Pamela Anderson". * [[ManCalledTrue Otting. AHT-ing. Not "OAT-ing". Two Ts. Is that so hard?!?]] * My last name is not SUSAN. It's Souza! How many times do I have to say it?! ** [[{{Bre the Writer}} This troper]] has had her name (Bronwyn) pronounced so many different ways it's not even funny. She has been called Bromine, Bromlyn, Brollin, Brownie, Bromley, Bronin, Ronan, Robin, Rollin, Bromyn, Bobbin, and Brunswick Stew. (She ''still'' does not understand this last one.) *** Yep! This Bronwyn has been referred to as all of those. Also, Robert. * Alasdair. No, not Alastair. Not Alisdare. NEVER ''ALAN!!'' * [[FreezairForALimitedTime This troper's]] mother's maiden name? '''NOT''' "Strange." There is no "E" there. There was that one [[WhatDoYouMeanItsNotAwesome decidedly awesome]] piece of junk mail addressed to "Strange Maybe," though... ** There was also that one annoying substitute teacher who somehow managed to mangle her real first name (Alexandria) into "Alexis." And he called her that. All. Day. Long. Given his, er, [[SadistTeacher reputation]], this may have been entirely malicious. * [[EllenBrand This troper]] is Travis Ellen Brand. Got sick of being mistaken for a boy for years, started going by Ellen. I have been called Tracy and Emily, usually, but there have been others... I used to punch people in elementary school for using "Travis" to tease me, after the change. * {{ThisTroper}}'s mother sometimes calls him and his two brothers by each others names, sometimes needing to go through the whole list before getting it right. ** Another editor's grandfather was heavily involved in her upbringing, after raising his own daughter and two stepdaughters (along with three sons and two stepsons), with the result that her grandfather routinely called the editor by her mother's or aunt's name, and sometimes took several tries to hit the correct name. The same editor's father-in-law routinely called the editor by her motheror sister-in-law's name (and the editor's mother-in-law frequently mixes up the names of her husband, two sons, and brother). The troper also can manage to mix up the names of her current pets, who are of

differing genders and ''species'' (male cat, female dove). ** This editor's mother will often go through a list of up to four or five names, depending on who lives in the house at the time, including the names of the ''cat and dog'', before reaching the name she intends to call. ** This editor is guilty of this himself - but then, his whole family is. ** Both [[{{Rogue 7}} my]] parents do this. You'd think that after 10 years of having 3 kids, they'd have figured it out by now. ** This tropers mother will invariably call her two sons by her any one of her brother's names if she so much as thinks of them. ** This troper is Hilary and her sister is Haley. Our parents constantly mix up our names. (Back when we had one, sometimes the ''dog's'' name was a possibility as well; the fact that said family pet did not have a name that would make a plausible human first or last name did not appear to factor into this.) Members of her maternal extended family have also occasionally called this troper by her mother's name, although at least that's [[IdenticalGrandson understandable]]. ** [[SkarmoryThePG This troper]]'s mother constantly calls him by his older brother's name. It makes sense, kinda, since said brother's son is called my name, and his younger son is called his older brother's name. ** This troper's mother often goes through all of her four daughter's names before she gets the right one. Sometimes she says the same (wrong) name twice. We call it "Joogeolivicking". ** This troper does this with her friends. She'll often go through about three or four names, quite frequently including her sister's before getting the right one. ** THis troper's mother has this problem with him and his two brothers. Oddly, so do people who have NEVER MET MY BROTHERS. As in, anyone one who gets my name wrong will ALWAYS call me either Matt or John (my brother's names) even if they don't know I have brothers. ** This troper is another one who has been called by the dog's name, which is a very doggy and not at all human-sounding name. More usually, my mother mixes me up with my sister, my aunt or her friends at work. (When she's ''very'' preoccupied, sometimes I get mixed up with her boss. [[MeanBoss Which is not a compliment]].) * This troper first met several of his current friends at a game of Dungeons and Dragons. [[CloudCuckooLander One of them]] could not grasp that my character and I had different names, and referred to me as my fictional character for well over a ''year''. Ironically, said character made it a point to refer to the other party members by brief descriptives (Girlhair, Elf, Idiot, Explodicus, Swordicus, Manbitch, That Girl, Thief, Rummy, Treehugger, Two-Stick, [[OfMiceAndMen Lennie]], and Sparkle Fantastic), and everyone else we meet as Steven. It's a quirk inhereted from regularly being the [[MadeOfIron only survivor]] of many a TotalPartyKill; Why bother to learn their names when they're just going to die in a week? * This troper's surname is an alternate spelling of a common male first name--so naturally, no one ever gets it right on the first try. Her middle name is an alternate spelling of a traditional female first

name--no one gets that right, either. All this, and she had the misfortune of having the first name Jocelyn, which not only has roughly a billion [[SpellMyNameWithAnS spelling variations]], but has also been mangled into Rosalyn, [[DarkwingDuck Gosalyn]], Joyce, Joyce-Lynn, Jasmine, and ''Jezebel.'' This troper hates her parents from time to time. * This troper is often called Stephanie though she thinks it sounds different from Tiffani that people wouldn't confuse it. Also people love changing that i to a y or pronouncing with that long a sound you know like with gwen stephani. * This troper tends to justify the confusion of his name (Shane and Shawn or Sean are both Irish and mean the same thing) when people call him Shawn. Egregious examples are harder to ignore: This troper has only known one "Shawn" and all others have bean a "Sean". A fair few teachers have still called me "Sean" while calling roll. Even worse, this troper was friends with a Sean and the mismatching of names lead to Sean's mother calling him Shane on several separate occasions. One boss constantly calls me Sean when looking at forms that only have MY NAME ON THEM. And let's not get started on the ease of rhyming Shane and this troper's last name which looks in writing way to close to Bumble Bee despite the fact that the second "B" is silent and there is an "R" in the name. Would settle for people calling me Patrick after my middle name, but Pat always comes off as a girls name (after all, I do have an Aunt Pat) and Shane-train and Bumble Bee are nicknames that stick way to easily (the latter especially after the Transformers Movie, which is ironically where the original mess up came from. My own brother couldn't distinguish between our last name and the TF character when he was 5.) ** This troper's name is "Sebastian". Most people get it right, except for one of my bosses, who insists upon calling me "Sabatine". Including in emails. With my correctly spelled name as the email address. Then of course there's my surname, which is extremely Dutch (and rather rare, even in Holland). Being born and raised in Australia, this means that it's been misspelled and mispronounced more times than I've had hot meals. Oddly enough, most people don't seem to have any trouble with my middle name, "Johannes". * This Troper was never really consistently known by her own name until she entered college. Her own family genuinely can't pronounce the name "Breann" (variant spelling of "Brianne") and usually call her a sort of two-syllabled "Bran," when they're not calling her her mother, aunt, or ''cousins''' names (This troper still needs to ask her identical grandma how she can mistake a tall, blonde, skinny mother of five for a short, dark-haired, fat childfree student). To her classmates and teachers, she was always "Pokeyman girl," "Raisin Bran," virtually any name starting with Br- or R- ranging from Brianna or Brenna to ''Bryan,'' or a variant of her last name altered to contain the word "smell," or a reference to a TV show whose name is the same as her surname. Eventually she gave in and used it as her screenname. This troper knew she had befriended one of her childhood bullies when he started calling her by name. * [[{{Rissa}} This troper]]'s real first name (which is not her username) lends itself to an affectionate shortening which she

''cannot stand''. Of course, as a small child people found the rage hilarious and so used it all the more. When she moved house (and school) aged nine, she made it her mission to never be called that again. So far, it's working - close friends call her by her username, and everyone else just uses her full name. Now if she could just convince her little sister... ** This troper had just the opposite problem, a shortened name that people would sometimes lengthen. My name is Chad. ''Just'' Chad. ''Not'' Chadwick. I know that Chad is often a shortened form of Chadwick, but that is not the case here. It's on my birth certificate as Chad. * This troper has a rather unusual surname ending in "...all", but people and businesses have a tendency to misspell and/or mispronounce it as either "...ill" or "...ell". (I've pretty much given up trying to get the Phone Company to correct their bills.) * The surname is Lang. Not Long, Lane, or Lake. LANG. * This troper had the misfortune of having both an unusual last name ending with an S and a lisp. Things got to the point that when someone ask my name, i just show them my ID * [[{{VorpalTempest}} This troper]]'s real name is MATTHEW. As in the biblical tax collector turned apostle or the crow from Sandman. Not MATT, though atleast that's understandable. What's odd is having a law teacher refer to this humble scripe as MICHAEL, as in the arch angle, for an entire year. Worse was another whole year of having a fencing team locker that this troper paid for labeled MICHAEL. It didn't help at all that one of the senior fencers was an actual MICHAEL with enough fanboys that this troper almost got beat down by a mob for "stealing" from his locker. And even after that incident people a year later still believe this troper has a brother somewhere named MICHAEL. MICHAEL is also apparently a common way for everyone to say MATTHEW because it happens a whole lot besides the examples. This troper has even received wrong forms and tests back from misc. MICHAELS. This troper has even received a college application with MICHAEL COLLINS. This troper swears there's an EvilTwin somewhere. ** Really though, how can you get the name Matthew wrong? It's a common name, people around the world know how to pronounce it, and even in Hong Kong [yes, I understand that it is not very exotic, but I live there, and if it makes you feel better I can give Taiwan as an example] there's a Matthew and a Michael coexisting peacefully in my grade, and no one gets their names mixed up. * [[{{Lurkerbunny}} This troper]] absolutely '''''hates''''' going into restaurants and coffee shops where they have to call your name to give you your order because no matter how well she enunciates, people always get it wrong and yell it out for the whole restaurant to hear. It's ASTRID. Not Astrit with a T or Astry with a Y and it sure as '''''HELL''''' isn't ASPRIN. It's ASTRID. Even though it's Scandinavian, it shouldn't be that hard! ** Well, judging from some of the creative mis-spellings above, be thankful nobody's ever called you "[[Series/DoctorWho TARDIS]]"... ** This troper has the same problem with coffee shops. The name is Kira, not Kiera, Kyra, Kiara or Kara, or even Kyira. And don't even get me started on all the substitute teachers who've pronounced it

wrong over the years. It's K-ear-ah, not K-eye-ra. *** Kira? So has anyone called you [[Main/DeathNote Light]] yet? **** Philistine. Clearly the correct term of address is [[StarTrekDeepSpaceNine Nerys]]. **** Of course. I get called "Shakira" more often, though, and [[BerserkButton I really hate that]]. * This tropers real name is Sigurd, like [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sigurd_Jorsalfare this fellow here]]. When he was in school it happened several times that when substitutes read his name from the list, it would somehow turn into "Sigrid", a female name, to general merriment. Another time he got called "Sigrun" (an uncommon female name), and when he ordered some books from a website, they came in a package adressed to "Sverre", which is at least a male name. * When this troper was crew on a play, the director called her her sister's name, Beth, despite being constantly corrected. In one annoying instance he said "I'm sorry I keep getting your name wrong, Beth." Non-sarcastically. * Apparently, the names "Victoria" and "Veronica" are very easily confused. Along with unwanted nicknames of "Vicky" or "Tori". * This troper has heard more variations on her nickname 'Lulu', then she cares to count. 'Lucy', Lilly.. is it so hard? And of course, it's a simpler nickname to 'Lucretia'.... * This troper's name inexplicably became Jim in highschool, to the point where people who knew Jim didn't know who Thomas was. * [[EponymousKid This troper]], Dillon ('''''not''''' "Dylan"), has been called David, Daniel, Darren, and (by an acquaintance who happened to be very drunk) Darryl. And had his name misspelled as "Dillion" and "Dilan" countless times, by friends, relatives, and official school documents alike, without even getting into "Dylan". ** I feel for you. This troper is actualy "Dylan", but has been mispelled "Dillon", "Dilyn", "Dylin", and for some reason, "Dyln". * Besides spelling variations (most adding Ls, Ns, or Hs) and simple mispronunciations (sometimes malicious), this "Alana" has also been Allanya, Alan, Adam, and ''Alone''-- the last on a business letter! * This troper has the last name Gregoire; as a result, quite a few people have called him Gregory by mistake. * This troper has a somewhat unusual example; a CloudCuckoolander friend has a habit of renaming everyone he knows. Not to names which bear any resemblance to the original names, and not to random names each time -- when he first meets a person, he assigns them a name and then uses it consistently. Initially, this troper only got "Mr. X" out of him, but in an example of FirstNameBasis, eventually became Jason X. This troper's real name has no relation to Jason. * This troper's first name is Jamie, thank you very much. Not the Spanish Jaime (pronounced hi-may), not Janey, not Jeannie, and not James. (I'm a girl, for pete's sake!) Her surname is also misspelled/mispronounced all the time- Farnik has been spelled as Farnick and Fernik and we have received telemarketers asking for the Franciks, the Frantics, the Francises, and (my personal favorite) the Farnsworths. Not a complicated name, either first or surname, but NOBODY.EVER.SPELLS.IT.RIGHT! People i've been best friends with for

years will give me birthday cards adressed to Jamey. This has really grown into one of my pet peeves. * This troper's first name is Andoy, and only his family and closest friends do not mistake it for Andrew, Andy (yes, the "o" has significance), Doyle or other such stuff. Another part of my name, Escucha, is something nearly no one I've met, has gotten right the first time. Or the rest of the times, really. * This trope is me and my family all over. Check it out: ** Niece named Navaha (sounds like "Navajo," right? Nope: nuh-VEY-uh) so my brother could spell it without fail. I gave dire warnings about [[MyNameIsNotDurwood the trouble]] [[SpellMyNameWithAnS she'll have]], offered many alternatives that wouldn't get drastically mispronounced... no one listened. ** My own name: ''Alethia''. Slight misspelling of original Greek ''Aletheia'', but much beloved name. Has netted me, among others: ''Alicia'', ''Alyssa'', ''Alyssia'', ''Aletha'', and ''Athena''. Classmate whose native language lacks ''th'' sounds called me ''Alice'' for months, which I cheerfully accepted as a rather unusual MyNameIsNotDurwood moment. Currently have a newsletter subscription for ''Athethia'' which I've been too amused to correct. ** Last name: ''Cyrus''. Nets us mail to ''Mrs. Cypress'', ''Mrs. Sirius'', ''Mrs. Virus''.... *** More amusingly, for combination with SpellMyNameWithAnS, people seem to intuit ''Syrus'', no matter how clearly we spell our name for them. E.g., they'll input it into computers repeatedly and then tell us we don't have an account. I once went to vote at college, where they had three moderators set up to cover different sections of the alphabet; I went over to the A-thru-C-thru-''something'' mod, said ''and spelled'' my name... and he turned to the mod at the other side of the room and said, "She's yours." ** Brother ''Madison'' got his name right before the movie ''Splash'' made all the mothers name their little girls ''Madison'' (apparently glossing over the joke that was a [[FishOutOfWater culturally unaware]] mermaid ''taking a boy's name''). Now ''Madison'' is no longer an option for boys, and my brother gets mail and phone calls that [[GenderBlenderName assume he's a girl]]. Most famously with the court paperwork that acknowledged him as father of the child in question, and then referred to him with the feminine pronoun.... ** Dad's name is misspelled from normal, reversing an AE combo. At least it tells him apart from the two other men in the area with the same first-last combo. ** And, last but not least, Dad's bad penmanship somehow managed to scrawl out brother's name of ''Daniel'' so poorly that the health card came back for ''Pavio''. Go ahead, try it: That's not as far of a stretch as you might think. *** [[{{Seanette}} I]] think I was the one who fixed that one! I'm pretty sure I saw such an instance while doing small-business-group health insurance eligibility (my functions included fixing errors committed by the enrollment people). * This troper (Jillian) has a strange track record of being called by names that do not even vaguely resemble hers. She was called "Sophie" by a family she babysat for, no matter how many times she corrected

them, and was once mistakenly entered into a tennis tournament as "Elizabeth." ** Everyone agrees this troper doesn't look like someone with his common first name. No one agrees on what to call him instead. * In early elementary school, some school officials mistyped or misread this troper's name or something, which resulted in my surname getting an "S" appended to the end for several years, though that one was eventually cleared up and, after a move, was never heard from again. More common is the mispronunciation, though - in the middle of this troper's surname, there is an O and two Ds, which are far too often mistaken for two Os and one D. And though my first name, "Jason" (or a logical shortening thereof, "Jay") is usually remembered, I've been called "Josh" or "Justin" or whatever male J-name you can come up with. And then there's my paternal grandmother, who has no trouble keeping my personality distinct from my father's, but constantly screws up the completely different name. And my maternal grandmother though she's never once misspoken my own name - is convinced my cat's name is "Gertrude", which is so unlike my cat's name that I can't figure out how she came up with it. ** I'm guessing this is common with male J-names... "Justin" here often gets replaced with "Jason" or other J-names of similar length... I've never been particularly annoyed, but I've been considering going by my first two initials (J.J.) as a nickname to avoid it... * This troper (Sally) has been called everything from Sheila through Stephanie to "Samuel" (They weren't even trying to insult me, they honestly mistook me for a boy). Plus everybody spells my last name with a CH instead of a CK, and on one occasion, someone refused to believe me when I tried to correct them. Every teacher I've ever had has forgotten my name at least once. * It is ''pronounced'' Mick-kray. No, Mssrs. Mick-kray-uh, Mick-kreeuh, Mick-krah, and Mick-kree do ''not'' live here, I'm afraid you have the wrong number, Mr. Telemarketing Asshole. * This troper has been going to the same school for NINE YEARS now. They still misspell my last name "Vaughan" as "Vaughn" on every certificate, permission slip, and whatever else my name is on. Even on the Spelling bee certificate, though [[HilarityEnsues Hilarity Ensued]]. ** This troper's school has four sports houses. One is called Vaughan, and everywhere I see it being spelt 'Vaughn' by students. I tend to facepalm when I see this, unless I'm [[GrammarNazi snarking about the other spelling mistakes in whatever I'm reading.]] * This troper has the poor fortune to have a double-"o" in his surname. People categorically pronounce it a as a long "o", despite the true pronunciation rhyming with the fast majority of words ending with the same three letters (the primary exception being "food"). That it leads to people making the assumption that I am so impolite as to have a warning built into my name is not amusing in the slightest. Type-B corruptions abound. * [[{{gs68}} This troper]], who in RealLife goes by the name of Raymond, once had an interviewer spell his name as "Freman." '''WHAT. THE FUCKING HELL.''' * For some reason, a lot of people seem to assume that [[InkkiBookman

Inkki's]] name is Nikki, whats more annoying is that I have had bills where they also called me Nikki as well and to top it all off, if I google my name, even Google itself says '''Did You mean: Nikki'''. * [[{{Cameoflage}} This troper]] is named Hil[[SpellMyNameWithAnS (l)]]ary. She is often called Haley (which is her sister's name, but only maybe half the people who use it by mistake know that), and one of her neighbors' kids called her Hillarine for something like two years, which always befuddled her but she never actually bothered to correct it. * My surname is pronounced "Cone", not "Kahn". Most people will at least remember this after I correct them, but my high school principal mispronounced it consistently for all four years. At least he got it right at graduation... * My surname is Lavergne, with the silent G ''before'' the N. Somehow, as my sister so eloquently put it, our name makes people temporarily dyslexic, leading them to pronounce it Lavernge (ending with a J sound.) * This troper's last name is cursed, it seems. Nine times out of ten, it is mispelled or mispronounced. Somehow, they turn Sauls, into (verbally) Sals, Suls, Salt (?!?), Salsa , Sauce, Sala, Sans , Saul and (on paper) Saus, Sal, Saul, Salsa, Saltan, etc, etc, etc. * [[{{Pieguy259}} This Troper]] is called Jake. Not Jacob. Not Jack. Not Jade, or Jay. Jake. ** He also knows two girls who came to his school at the beginning of this year, both were blonde. One was Parke, the other Lucy. He kept getting the two mixed up, and occasionally, just for fun, even thouch Lucy has dyed her hair, still calls either of the two "Parkucy". ** In addition, his grandmother is terrible with names, often calling any of her four grandsons by each of the other three's names in succession, followed by "Peter-Paul-Mary!" as a bit of [[LampshadeHanging self-parody.]] * My last name is an English mispronunciation of a German misspelling of a Polish river named after an animal. I'm so used to people mispronouncing it that the few times people guess accurately, I often "correct" (to the wrong way!) them out of habit. And my first name is a somewhat common one that can be spelled two ways. Mine's not spelled the more common way. (I joke that I go by aliases because no one can spell or pronounce my name) * This troper has lost the count of how many times she has her first name misspelled and having to spell it letter by letter each time, but since ''it is'' a very rare name with a difficult spelling with includes two "n" and has a final "Y" who is pronounced like the Spanish "I", she understands it (and she encourages people to call her by a diminutive formed by the three first letters of her name). However, she would like that her relatives stop calling her by ''her sister's'' name, who for some bad parental naming choice shares the same initial sound. At least that's better that the situation years ago, when their maternal grandma insisted in call both girls by their mother and her deceased sister names, ''despite them being written and pronounced completely different than ours and having no similar sounds between them'', just because the cadence of each pair names was vaguely similar.

* This troper once met a girl named G''r''abriela. Allegedly, her mother wanted to name her the old fashioned "Gabriela", but since she was aware of that repeated mispronunciation she decided to baptize her baby with that variation. Ironically, everybody insists in "corrects" her name, over and over. * This troper's last name is Pacek. No, it isn't pronounced Pakek, Pasek, Paysek, Paycheck, Peacock, or ''Pancake (seriously, wtf?!)''. It's Polish (although not really noticeable or common) and its pronounced ''Patsek''. Mispronunciations used to get me mad when I was younger, but after realizing that no one will ever get it right the first time, I just go with Paycheck. ** Polish seems to have a bit of a problem with it. There are stories of people named "Zaj&#261;c" (pronounced "Zayontz") having their name pronounced like "Zey-jack". * This troper has the misfortune of having an uncommon first name and an impossible to spell or pronounce French last name. Her first name is Janelle. Not Jenelle, Janel, Ganelle, or Genelle (or variations). And my last name's pronounced like "long time", not "long tang"! One vice-principal once managed to make her last name sound ''Asian''. On a side note, people love to come up with ridiculous nicknames, most famously Janellie-bean (shortened to bean, if said person wanted to get on my nerves fast). She was also once called Nigel by someone in her Media Studies class, and it stuck for the rest of the year (along with the name D-Link several years before, after the CD player she used to always listen to). She can't help but be glad she hasn't been called any red-head nicknames. * [[{{Nomic}} This troper]] quarantees no English-speaker will ever pronounce his last name right (since in Finnish things are pronounced quite differently). However, he wishes people would atleats write it correctly. So far he has seen it written as mr. Uttu, mr. Utu, mr. Kuuttu, mr. Outo (Finnish for strange), mr. Vuttu (replace first u with an i for the finnish equivalent of the f-word) and mr. Uutu. And this happens very often. He often jokes about getting his name changed into somethign easier to pronounce, like Maladath il Ered'nash. * [[@/HersheleOstropoler This troper]] worked in a radio station newsroom. The newscaster called him "Richard," which is the right length at least, and "James," which isn't even that. * This troper has gotten the junk mail for the following last names: Hope, Polk, Pulp, Pepe, Lopez (?), Pape. Palpe, Poltz, Holtz. Hint: Head of the Catholic Church, stupid Junk Mailers. * This troper's name is not Lisa, Liza, Lori, Lauren, or ''Debbie''. But she's answered to all of those at one time or another. * This troper's surname is ''Sprague'', pronounced to rhyme with ''plague'' - and yet she manages to get Sprawg (rhyming with ''frog'') all the time. At least that one makes sense. Less sensible are Sprewg and Spreeg. I still don't know how they come up with those. Oh, and there's Spurgoo... Yeah. * '''[[ZombifiedAngel THIS TROPER]] IS [[BerserkButton NOT]] FREAKING MADISON.''' Damn you, ''Splash''... * My name has two syllables. No, I don't care the last is only one letter long, it's still part of my name. Stop leaving it off. * This Troper's name, Stephen, is consistently being misspelled as

Steven when heard, or mispronounced as Stephan when read. In high school Spanish, we used to routinely introduce ourselves in Spanish and write down our classmates' names as part of a bingo-type game to be played later. This troper got so annoyed at people screwing up his name he started simply introducing himself as "Steve." Luckily he gets to also weird people out at times by virtue of the fact he was named after StephenKing. * My father once had trouble remembering his neighbor's name, and so kept referring to him as "Pete". One time, he was telling someone about how he kept referring to this guy as Pete "...and his real name is John." At which point my mother corrected, "No, his real name is ''Dave''." ** We get plenty of mistakes with our surname, also, which is Nathanson, pronounced like a patronymic (though I'm not sure if it is). Misspellings I've seen are Nathansen and Nathenson. Mispronunciations we've heard over the phone are NA-thanson (short a), Nathason, Matheson, Mathis, and of course, people calling and asking for Nathan. I'm determined to name my firstborn son Nathan for this reason. *** ...and being named Nathan Nathanson strikes you as a good idea? * My name has a short 'e'. It is ''not fucking pronounced as 'Meegan' ''. * An induhvidual who goes by the name Jos is constantly called Jorge, even by his family. It's not that the names are that similar, but said induhvidual has an uncle named Jorge, and even his own mother seems to forget who she's talking to. * This troper's last name is four letters long. ''Four letters''. And she's well aware that it rhymes with a slightly more common one, and of her tendency to mumble, so she generally tends to spell it out when introducing herself. Ask her how many school officials have then ''immediately'' turned around and started to look up records for a (troper's name) ''Ford''. * This troper is named Chris, and is constantly amazed at how many people call him Mike. I still can't figure out ''why'', exactly. * This troper's first name is 'Xavier', pronounced 'hav-YER'. And yet after several repeated introductions of 'Xavier, with an X', people in his country still pronounce it 'save-YER', much to his annoyance. He plans to go by his middle name in college, but given that it's 'Loureno', pronounced almost exactly like 'Lorenzo', he is expecting the worst. * I'm Jessica. Not Jennifer. (And not [[{{Series/Heroes}} Niki]], either, but that's a joke for another day.) It should ''not'' be that hard, but apparently I'm not alone. Another Jessica, upon being introduced to me at a conference, immediately grabbed my hand and asked, "Do people call you 'Jennifer' ''all the time''?" * My name is Matthew. It seems like half the people I meet initally call me "Michael", which makes me point out two things to them..."Number one: The name 'Matthew' is not a hard one to remember. Number two: 'Michael' and 'Matthew' don't sound that much alike." * Alex. Alex, not Adam. Seriously now, it's simple. * It's Heleen. Not Helleen, Helen, Hlene, Hlne or Helena. And it's pronounced 'Heh-lain'. Not too hard, now is it?

* When this troper's co-senator in student senate annoys him (which is almost daily) he begins to call her Eleanor instead of Rebecca. Everyone else hates her just as much, so she gets really crazy about it when nobody corrects me or even joins in. * It's Erin. Start's with an E, is a feminine name, and is of IRISH original not HEBREW. I understand all of the little notes written by great-grandparents when I was a baby (given that Erin only became common a few decades ago), but I swear every teacher/boyfriend/employer I have ever had has insisted that my name is, in fact, Aaron. Including one friend who's middle name is Erin. ** If it makes you feel better, I've known at least two girls with that first name, and I would NEVER make that mistake. ** Just to clarify, it's pronounced like Ear-rin, right? If so, [[DarkInsanity13 I]] know your pain. My grandmother comes from a small town of the same name, and ''everyone'' I know says Aaron, and I have to correct them. I actually had an argument with a friend on the pronounciation, who said that since she used to have a friend who pronounced it like "Aaron", it had to be the right one; I, of course thought ''I'' was right since my grandmother came from the small town and everyone said "Ear-rin" there. She recently corrected someone who said it was this, and thankfully didn't question. ** My third roommate in college was an Erin dating an Aaron. They actually DID pronounce it the same. * Granted, 'Yale' is not a particularly common name, nor is it often used as a female's name, but really, it ain't hard. This Troper's BerserkButton goes off whenever someone deliberately tries to not make it sound like Yale University Yale. "Yarlay"? Really? * It's pronounced ''Jor-El''. Like Superman's Dad. Yes, that Superman. '''Not Gerald, it is not Jurr, or Jerome, or spelled with two rrs and an e. It's Jurell.'' * My surname is Eiszele. Nobody who sees it can pronounce it, and nobody who hears it can spell it. It's pronounced EYE-z'l, not easel or eyezelli. I don't mind eyezelli so much, but I hear easel more often, and I cannot tell how it was derived. Is there a language that pronounces ei as ee? ** English. Weird, huh? * "Your last name is just like (Famous Person)!" No. No it is not. It is ONE LETTER DIFFERENT. If famous person is so famous, how come you (general you) don't remember how to spell their last name? Would you say 'Mr. Abush' had the same last name as the President? NO. * I've been known to pointedly ignore people who call me "Ricky." Also, between AddedAlliterativeAppeal and the fact that there is a rather famous person whose first name is my last name with an R for a W, that mistake annoyingly common. * This happens in Chinese too actually. My name has been written/misread in a variety of interesting ways, and it's actually not that hard to write at all though. Plus most of the people at my church call me by my nickname, which makes me suspect that at least some of the newer members have no idea what my real name is. * This troper has a few pet peeves regarding her name. First and foremost, it's not pronounced "Marley"--there is an "i" in there. Second, if you even ''think'' of shortening it to "Mary", you are

seeking to enter a world of pain. Third, any mention immediately thereafter of rowing boats or of life being a dream ''will'' be met with violence. * My last name's Shatzer, spelled and pronounced all sorts of ways, usually Schatzer or Shatner. Once my father was asked if he was related to [[WilliamShatner William]]. The craziest spelling I've come across was Shatuvger. * This troper loves her name, but it's also her BerserkButton. It's Michaela, pronounced mc-KAY-la. ''Michaela.'' Not Michelle. Not Michella. Not Mackella. Not Michael-uh or Michael. And ''definitely'' not Micheala. To make matters worse, her last name is unpronounceable and unspellable. ** If you're surrounded by nerds, and provided you don't hate the character/canon, you could say "like the girl in ''[[TransformersFilmSeries Transformers]]''"? * My name is Linnea, which is apparently hard to pronounce, but most people get it after a few corrections. However, in Elementary School, I had a classmate named Liana. Cue the inevitable mix-up. (We didn't even look anything alike) * MY LAST NAME IS NOT CHAPLIN, GOD DAMN IT. It's Chapin, like Harry. THIS IS NOT HARD. * Hi, I'm Erik. No, NOT Eric or Erick, Erik with a K. And my last name is a river in Norway, so don't even bother trying to pronounce or spell it correctly until I provide an explanation. * This troper's last name is 'Macintyre'. With a lowercase 'i'. I've had to put up with 'MacIntyre' and 'McIntyre' for years, even in highschool. Also one time I received a phone call asking for my dad, a 'Mr Ma-Kintyre'. The pronunciation was so mangled I originally thought it was a wrong number, although swiftly apologised, but the idiot caller had already hung up...it's a really common name, too. I also hate it. * [[HawkW This Troper]] has seen his surname, 'Weisman', butchered more ways then you could possibly imagine. Wiseman, Weissman, Wiesman, and even 'Westman' aren't so bad, but 'Wessym'? Seriously, WTF? * Subverted. This troper is one letter off from an internationally famouse actor. People think we have identical names. WTF. ONE LETTER OFF. * This troper's first name is Cara, yes, spelled with a C. NOT a K! And it is not Carla or Laura either. And it's not pronounced like 'care-a'. It's four letters, how can people butcher it so many ways? ** Could be because some girls named Kara/Cara do pronounce it the way you don't. * [[DaNuke Da_Nuke]] has a friend called Jos, a.k.a. Paco (short for Francisco). He also knows someone called Alejandre, a.k.a. Alejandro (Alejandre is his surname). His best friend also has an habit of resorting to "Timmy", "Jimmy Neutron" or "Lic" (short for "licenciate") whenever he forgets a name. * This troper admits that her name is a difficult one, and in no way expects anyone to get it on the first try, although it would be cool if they did. However, the number of syllables should be obvious. Everyone ignores the second-to-last last letter, thus making it three syllables, instead of four. Ironically, they also have trouble with

her last name, which is extremely common. * [[GalenDev This Troper]]'s name is Galen. Pronounced like the word "ale" (as in beer) with a G and an N sandwiching it. This name is highly prone to mispronounciation and misspelling. One asshole even came to my house asking for "Juleen." Needless to say I was [[BerserkButton very unhappy with that gentleman.]] And of course, everyone assumes my name has a "y" in it. Gaylin, Gayland, Gaylord (and one interesting example of Galyn, don't quite know how that one happened). It's come to the point where I almost exclusively use my [[JackAttack nickname]] outside of the house. ** Never "Gallon"/"Gal-en"? * This troper has been called "Widget-mo-widget" by someone at school. To be fair, this person was somewhat of a cloudcuckoolander and does this to a number of people. * This troper's cousin had a classmate in high school named Anna, who got stuck with the moniker Gerbil for some reason. It got to the point where quite a few people knew her by that name only. * This troper used to be called "Raymond" on a regular basis by a high school English teacher, partly because he sat next to a Raymond with a similar build to him. * [[QuantumToast This troper]]'s first name is fine, but his surname (Gemmell)... not so much. People who see it first tend to pronounce it with a soft G (as in "giant") rather than a hard G (as in "grape"), while people who hear it first tend to mess up the double letters. So far the misspellings he's seen include Gemell, Gemmel, Gemmil, Gemill, Gemmill and ''Jbushnell''. Didn't help at all that throughout secondary school most people (except, oddly, the teachers) [[LastNameBasis called him by his surname]]. * My real name is Katherine. I can understand people calling me this if they don't know me well. I don't understand people picking their own nickname for me; I would like to take this opportunity to state that I refuse to answer to Kate, Kathy, Kates, Katerina, Kay, K-K, Kai-Di, Katelyn, Kat, or anything except ''Katie''. * Someone has to be pretty dense to mix up 'Cameron', either as an intentional riff or unintentional twist. I got over insisting I didn't like to be called 'Camera' or more desperately-shot-in-the-dark 'Camera-on' and simply informed someone, "You have passed the acid test for lame. Thanks for playing." I still get people from time to time who read it and call me 'Carmen', but I just give them a look of quiet sympathy that comes back to haunt them if ever they figure out their mistake. The one I really object to, even though it's relatively benign still manages to push my buttons, is 'Cam', and I put it simply as soon as someone asks, "No, you may NOT call me 'Cam'." ** For that matter, 'DokEnkephalin' gets many misspellings, and some people who inexplicably shorten it to 'enk' when 'dok' is less awkward to say, but it's pretty comical when someone tries to pronounce it. I used the name in MatrixOnline, and sometimes during club parties I'd get a stammered ShoutOut from Awakened Radio: "Dokenn...kuhFALL in?" I tolerate it because, I'd never heard anyone use it verbally before I picked the name, and I still have yet to hear anyone pronounce it correctly. * {{Seanette}} gets renamed regularly. She can understand Shawna,

Shannon, or Jeanette (especially in one high school class where there ''was'' a Jeanette in there too), but does not get where Cindy, Cheryl, or Sharon come from. She also loathes efforts to shorten her first name (there is ''no'' shorter form she can stand). She, for the most part, simply answers to anything close enough that she can figure out it means her (as long as tone of voice is polite-to-friendly). * A funny variation happens to [[{{Alkthash}} This Troper's]] mother. Her first name is Treasure. Whenever she first fills out her name for something she is likely to get a reply back to Mr. Treasure as people assume that she accidentally switched her first and last names on the form. * This troper has a teacher who called a student Peave for about half a year. His actual last name is Peel. Thanks to this troper, Peave stuck and has become his nickname. The same teacher called Camille Carmelle. This troper has another teacher who refered to Cameron as Brandon. Hilarity ensued. * This troper's real name is Ben, but is called several different names ranging from similar sounding ones such as Ken and Glenn, to ones that have absolutely have no similarity whatsoever such as Jason, and Kelly. One of his teachers consistently called him Patrick for over a year (and this troper constantly hung out with a friend of his who WAS called Patrick and always assumed the teacher was talking to HIM) until he found out and corrected her...and is always referred to as Matthew by his mother's co-workers despite multiple corrections and several meetings. ** On top of that, his SURNAME is frequently misspelled as well, mostly by people who seem to think that there are TWO "e"s in the name, not one. He also has actually once received a letter addressed to him that had completely butchered the name to be spelled a C, a Y, and a Z...three letters that his name most definitely does NOT have. * Certain names are insanely easy to misspell and mispronounce at the same time. Case in point, I know a couple of people with the first name "Sol," which means "sun" in various languages. I've seen their name written as "Saul," "Soul," "''Soil''," and "Salt," among others. Their last names get the mispronunciation treatment too. I always found it odd that people would pronounce "ca" as "kay" instead of just "ka". * My Surname is Ol'''of'''son. Not ''Olson''. I am NOT related to the Olson twins, okay? So stop asking. ** Are you related to [[SuperMan Jimmy Olson]]? * No, my name is not "James." Yes, "Jaime" is my real name, not a nickname. You want to talk to a James from my family, go talk to my oldest uncle Jim, his son Jimmy, or HIS son James. Oh yeah, and people spelling my name as "Jamie" more than once is one of my biggest pet peeves. * I get that 'Dylan' could be read as 'Dye-lan', but how the hell do you get 'Cliff' or 'Kyle' or, and this really gets me, 'Merry'. I don't get it! And that's not even counting when people get my first name screwed up, I am NOT Barett, Bobby, or Barny! It's Bartlett, and I can't go by 'Bart' cause that's Dad's name! And don't even get me started on my last name. There. Is. NO. V! * This editor's name is Zackarias, yet somehow, someway, many

classmates in his high school began calling him Stanley, or some varient thereof. He doesn't mind that much, though. * My name is Aaron. Two As. One R. Absolutely no Ls. * I know that "Tamar" is uncommon. I know that the way I pronounce it is also uncommon (TAY-marr as opposed to tuh-MARR). And I know that Tamara is a very common name that's very similar to mine. So I can understand the confusion, I really can. But I've been called Tamara, tuh-MARR, Tamiera (???), and bizarrely, April. Really, you should be able to get it by the tenth try - I'm starting to think you just aren't ''trying''. * It's Shara. Sha like in shark, ra like in rabbit, not that hard. It's not Sarah, Sara, Shera, Sharah, Sari, Charlotte, Chara, Chera or Chewre (still don't know how that last one came about)And my surname is Salt! Not Sale, Selt, Sault, Solt or any other phonetic nonense. It's a word that is used every day, how can you get it that badly wrong?! * Mispronouncing and misspelling this troper's names is definitely her BerserkButton. Thankfully there are more Rachaels nowadays than Rachels, but it is still spelled this way by everybody on first try. People have corrected her (shouldn't she know how to spell her own name by now?) As for her surname, Eyre, is it really so difficult? ''Jane Eyre'' is one of the most famous books in English, for crying out loud! It's not spelled 'air' or pronounced like 'tyre'! Not to mention the horrible tendency people have to add an 's' on the end, for absolutely no reason. She once added an 's' to the surname of a nasty lunchlady who kept doing this and ended up in detention. Completely unfair. * Living in Germany this troper got used to his Name ''Kenneth'' being mangled quite frequently. The worst pronounciation he ever heard though, was ''cAn-it'', even after repeating his name five times. * My name is Sophie, not SOPHIA. No one seems to know how to spell it correctly, either. "Sofi" is a common one, for some reason, which is annoying. * This troper's last name is usually said wrong on the first, and several times after, try due to it being German. The 'w' is pronounced as a 'v'. For those that are obviously not paying attention when he says it, he didn't say 'screw me' * This troper's name is Kate, but she sometimes uses Katherine for work purposes. She has been called every possible variation on Katherine and frequently Karen. And, twice in ten minutes, Sophie. * This troper's surname is "Ingrem" but it is almost always misspelt as Ingram. Not only that but during the ''Who Wants to be a Millionaire'' scandal, she was frequently asked if she's any relation to Charles and Diana Ingram ... * [[MisterAlways My]] name. Is. Not. RUE-BUH (Ruben, if you were wondering). I don't know how people get this wrong in my country, it might just be pronunciation. Compare: ** Rue-bun (proper). ** Rue-buh (fuck you with burning candles). ** And don't get me started on Rue-bin or Robin. Fuck's sake. *** Can I just call you [[SwordOfTruth Zedd]]? * This troper has a double affliction of this. His brother looks close

to the same as he does, and our names also sound similar. Teachers frequently get us mixed up. And on my last name, which is spelled M-IC-H-E and pronounced like the mouse, is frequntly pronounced "Meesh" or "Mi-shay", which whenever it happens to me I tend to correct. This caused a bit of a mess during my brother's eigth-grade graduation ceremony. When the man got to his name he pronounced it "Mitch" and I shouted "MICHE!" from way up in the stands. He corrected himself and I think the crowd laughed. * [[MikeK This troper]] remembers having a pretty frustrating experience working on a school project where the classmate he was paired off was oddly convinced his name was Billy, which cropped up so much he eventually stopped bothering to correct her. His last name is long and easily mangled enough that he won't even get into the hundreds of variations he's heard, but his mom has gotten a somewhat amusing variation from trying to ''avoid'' mispronunciation: She's a teacher and just has students call her Mrs. K., so she once received a card from a student's parents that was addressed to Mrs. Kay. And now it's gone even further, as someone has called her Mrs. ''L''. * This Troper once accidentally misspelled FanFic/PrettyCurePerfumePreppy's author's alter ego's name (Bia Hoshigo) as Bai Hoshino when he created an Imagine Casting page for the fanfic. (And yes, the author did make a note of it when announcing the page to LiveJournal viewers.) The mistake has since been corrected. * For easier explanation, let's assume [[NotSoBadassLongcoat this troper]]'s surname is Martinez (TranslationConvention, not to confuse you further). And his name isn't Martin (or nothing starting with M. He just likes to be called Mike). Some people, especially at work, often call him "Martin". Sheesh. * [[EtherealFrog This Troper]] is hit by this very hard in real life and on the internet. It's a RunningGag by this time. Kurtis (Not with a C) Commanda (Not "Commando", "Commado", "Commandai") is [[InformedAbility clearly very hard to pronounce. I change my surname every math work sheet. One of my books has "Kurtis Communist" on the front, a worksheet "Kurtis Lieutenant", and a major project "Kurtis Cameraderie" . As for the internet, I have only met 3 people who I have confirmed to know how to pronounce "ethereal". The rest never tried, or tried and missed. Common mispronounciations include "etheral" "ethermal" "eternal" "etheral with all short es" and a couple worse. Some people never tried and just used my clan tag instead. * Okay. So. Amelia. Like Amelia Earhart, right? So why do some people call me Emily? Even if I mumble, it doesn't sound similar, does it? My Latin teacher made this mistake, and sometimes he still calls me Emily as a joke. It's not very common, so I guess I don't mind. What's more common is being mixed up with my sister. Sure, we both have long hair, but she has distinctive highlights AND glasses. So no, I'm not Stella. I remember one time when someone came up to me and said, "Wow, Stella, you look so different without your glasses." At one point, my sister got brought in for what I said. Even when I was brought in first. She doesn't even have the same classes as I do...she's even two years younger than I am...aarrrrrgh...

* [[TheUltimateFangirl This troper]] has dealt with this problem for her entire life. (Speaking from now on in first person). I am [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BilingualBonus bilingual]] (Hebrew, then English), and when I moved to the US, I decided to make my name in English as close as I could to my name in Hebrew. So my name is spelled Dana, but pronounced like Donna. Over the course of my life, I have been called everything from Dayna to Doh-na. I was even called Donny once by a little girl I knew. Note that I usually am understanding of this if it's an accident, but I don't tolerate it when intentional. But what really introduced this as a BerserkButton of mine is an incident in my high school. My yoga teacher has a good friend named Dara, so she occassionally calls me Dara on accident. One time, a classmate- keep in mind, none of my classmates in this class are friends, in fact they are mean to meheard this and said, "Oh, like Dora?" And since then they all refer to me as Dora, like in Dora the Explorer. To say that I didn't like this was an {{understatement}}. At a certain point, I was passed by a freshman girl from this class, and the [[CoolTeacher head of our school]] was within earshot. She decided that this would be an appropriate time to [[KickTheDog call me Dora]]. Having had my BerserkButton pressed, I yelled for the hall and headmaster to hear, " [[ThrowingDownTheGauntlet YOU WANT TO]] [[WhosLaughingNow SAY THAT AGAIN, BITCH?]]" When I later explained this to our head of school, he agreed, to my great joy, that [[RefugeInAudacity it was justified]]. * [[Tropers/JosephStaleknight This Troper]]'s true surname ("Rathinasamy") has always been mispronounced in high school. Just to make this clear, if anybody has heard of some guy named "Rathmaswamy" or "Rathinahsmy", please be aware that (s)he meant "RATH-in-a-saw-me". As in, "There is something called a 'rath' that lives in something called a 'saw-me'". * This Troper's first name is Catherine. Simple, right? WRONG. Her teacher was always calling her Katrina, even though she corrected him every time, but he was by no means the worst. Another teacher pronounced her name "Curtrin". It wasn't an accent problem either... * This troper's mother's last name... OK, people, it's not that complicated! Honestly, just because it has an X in it... I've seen it spelt with an S, which is incorrect, and a K, which is ''really'' incorrect, and a freaking E, which is just fucked up... * This troper's given name is Allyson. My sister's name is Ashlyn. You could count on my mother to remember that after twenty-odd years, right? Wrong. It's gotten to the point that she'll call for "Allyson" and we'll both look up and ask "Which one?" * Sixth grade. Horrible principal who didn't care a shred about anyone in the school. In a school of 135 kids, she couldn't remember my name. -->'''Her''': Good morning, Brittany. -->'''Me''': My name is Bethany, actually. -->'''Her''': I know what your name is, Brittany. -->By the way, there was not even another Brittany in the school. * This troper and her mother have this as a beserk button. My name is Alexandra, not Alexandria. The second one is a town in Virginia. Yeah, it's kind of a [[SeriousBusiness big deal.]] * My name is Stefan (pronounce: Stay-fun). No, not Stephen. Nor Steve.

No, not Stef. Steffen it is not, either. Can you say "Stay"? Can you? Yes? Yes? Good girl! (/boy) How about "fun", ever tried that? ** And then the surname comes up, which is German, and I'm a Dutchman. No, Linnemann, with twice double 'n'. No, not Lindemans, it's Linnemann. Ad nauseam. * [[@/{{Bud0011}} This troper's]] family name is Spahn (pronounced Spahn). But throughout high school, people insist on pronouncing it SPAN or {{SPAWN}} (both the comic book character and the word related to reproduction). * I just want to make it known that MY NAME IS NOT TAMMY. * In seventh grade, my history teacher once accidently called me Steve (for the record, ''I'm a girl!''), after that, it took three years to get kids to stop calling me Steve. My best tactic was to just to not answer until they used my real name. * This Troper's name(Emelia) is cursed to be either pronounced Emmalia or spelled with an A. Three teachers have also consistently called her Emily. Not to mention her last name, which rhymes with "Olson" and has had the first consonant dropped and replaced. * Don't call me [[@/{{MiraShio}} me]] Jenina/Jolina/Angelica (what the heck?) or Dennis. It's ''Janina Denise''. * This [[@/DialgaX Troper]] knows someone with the surname of Weed but everyone insisted on pronouncing it "Reed". * This polish troper's brother, who lives in the US, introduces himself as "Jersey", because he got tired of people failing repeatedly to pronounce and memorize "Jerzy". * My name is spelled "Evan." Not "Even." Or "Evon." Or "Evin." Or "Aevan." Yes, I have encountered ''all'' of those spellings before. * I have two brothers who are muchy more prominent in the social scene then I am. Our names are Tom, Travis, and Tim. I, being Travis, am constantly called "Timmy" or "TOmmy". Sometimes, even my parents do it. Hell, I even did it once. * Substitute teachers used to do this to my name (Kasie) all the time. It's pronouced KAY-see, not KASS-e. Though I did let a gym teacher call me Kass-e. * This troper, a high school freshman, is in an extracurricular club her sister was also in until last year (she graduated). Of course, everyone calls her 'Mini-[sister]'; in most cases, she can't tell whether it's an affectionate nickname or if they actually don't know her name. The head genuinely cannot remember it, and will unthinkingly call her by her sister's name even if her sister is ''in the room''. * This troper is named Cody. Not Cory. Not Tony. ''Cody.'' And let's not even get started on the last name, a French one whose pronunciation has only been half-Anglicized, meaning nobody will get it right on the first try. * Due to large amounts of angsting by me and a temper, my sister calls me [[GundamSeedDestiny Shinn]]. My name is ''Shaun'', damn it!!! * Living in Texas all my life, I've accepted that Texans cannot pronnounce the last syllable (or in some cases, last half) of my name. Introductions usually go as follows: ** "Hi, my name is Christina!" ** "Good to meet you, Christin'''e'''/Christy/Chris!" * I've learned that pretty much every person outside of downtown

Nashville cannot pronounce my last name right. (It's pronounced MUHLIN, not MOL-EN) And another half can't remember my given name. I've been called K.C., Sandra, Christie, Katie, etc. It's Cassie. It's not that hard. * My name is Maciej (Polish equivalent of Matthias), but almost every teacher I meet calls me Marcin (Martin) at first. * This troper's full name is not Josephina, or Josefina, or (once) Josepina. Her nickname is not spelled Josey, Josei, or Joise. She is Josie OR Josephine, and do NOT try to call her anything else, thankyouverymuch. * My name is Caleb. Several different people (from completely different social circles) will call me Jacob when they're distracted. Often enough that [[SureWhyNot I answer to it.]] * A meta-Type "F": For a long while, [[User/{{DonaldthePotholer}} I]] [[IReadThatAs read]] [[strike:[[RougeAnglesOfSatin Philbotneum]]]] [[AppliedPhlebotinum Phlebotinum]] as '''Plotonium'''. Pronounced [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin exactly as]] [[TechnoBabble you would expect]]. ** As you can see, I still have problems with that Trope. * My name is Miranda, and I have been called Amanda on several occasions. Unfortunatly, my cousin who died of cancer before I was born was named Amanda, which I have to sadly explain to people to make sure they don't make that mistake again. * This troper is Anna, which is a pretty common name. And this troper does not understand why people keep calling her Anne, Ann, Annie, Emma or Nanna. Yes, seriously. * My name is not Victoria, so you can stop calling me that now. * Please, people, [[@/{{Clae}} my]] name is Cyn'''an'''thia. Not Cynthia. Or Shinta. All of those names have different meanings. * I remember hearing a band interviewed on the radio a long time ago one member introduced himself as Booker, but the DJ apparently misheard him and spent the whole time calling him "Booger". Either Booker himself didn't notice, or was too polite to say anything. * My father was called Chipwood instead of Chitwood when he was in Jr. High gym class by the gym teacher. According to him, the teacher wasn't doing this to be cruel, he was just quote, "white knuckle stupid." ** And my first name is Brian, and yet people seem to want to pronouce it Bryan. * My maiden name was Easterlin. Not Easterland, not Esterlin (seriously, how hard is it for so many people to spell 'Easter'?), not Easterling. I realize it's rare to the point that I have literally never met anyone outside my family with it, but jeeze, it shouldn't be that difficult. It's a holiday with a 'lin' on the end. * My name is Miranda. I don't like nicknames, so I always go by just my name. I have been referred to as Mirana (easy to get to), Mira, Miriam, Amanda, Anna, and as a crowner of How the Hell did you come to THAT conclusion, Ettienne. I cannot find a matching sound between Miranda and Ettienne to explain this. * It's Tanner. Not Taylor, not Tyler, and ''certainly'' not [[GenderBlenderName Tammy]]. * [[{{Tropers/Syreni}} I've run into]] this problem a few times. My

name is a variant of Alana, and pronounced exactly the same: Ah-l-aan-ah. But some people seem to insist on pronouncing it like it's spelt: Eee-luh-nuh. I've also been called Alan, Helen, Elaine and Ellen. * Gah. [[{{Tropers/Kenzberry}} My]] name is Makenzie. Makenzie. ''Not that hard.'' Yet somehow people manage to mix in up with Mackinley, Mickey, Michael, and (and I have no idea how ''this'' happened), ''Nicole.'' * MY NAME IS VERONICA. NOT VICTORIA, NOT VIRGINIA, NOT VIVIANA, NOT [[PrecisionFStrike FUCKING]] VIAGRA. * I am not called Charlotte. I am not called Emily. I am not called Rebecca/Becky. Where do you people get these names? * Open a dictionary, look up 'Bad', turn it into an adverb by adding an -ly. It's so simple that even a toddler could pronounce that. So where do people find the ''R?'' * I was born "John". People always want to seem more important or something, so they call me Jonathan. It's not Jonathan; I was born as John and my nickname is Johnny (I know, it's longer than "John", but that's been my nickname for years), and do ''not'' get me started on the spelling of my nickname. * This Troper's real name is Stephen, pronounced the same as with a V, and ONLY Stephen. It is not Steve, "Steffen," Stevie, Steve-easy ([[FlatWhat What!?]]) and definitely NOT Steve-O (This Troper HATES nicknames!). * My name is Gabi, short for Gabrielle. I have been called Gabriel or Gabriella by too many teachers to count. People also spell my name Gabby, Gabbie, Gaby, Gabbey, Gabbi, and have been called Debbie(ftw!?), Ashley, and Abby. How!? ** Not to mention, people are always coming up with [[SarcasmMode cute little nicknames.]] Some are Gabberina, Gabbers, Gabbs, Gibbs, Gibby, Gibson, and The Gabster. The only nicknames I will answer to are Gabi, The Gabster, and [[TheCheeseFacePage Cheese Face]](long story short: I need to enunciate a little better) * This troper's last name is pronounced "Mickey", like [[DisneyAnimatedCanon Mickey Mouse.]] It is NOT pronounced "Mishay", "Meesh", or "Mitch". * My mother's name is Loni. She frequently gets called Lori and Lonnie, even by members of her own family, much to her aggravation. * As it turns out, Welsh is one of most difficult languages for the average English speaker to comprehend. My surname, Staley, is already heavily anglisized, from Stacklen (Stock-len, with a lot of phelmb on the first syllable) I believe. Even ''this'' infinitely-easier-topronounce word is often bastardized to "Stanley" despite the fact that I do not have an N anywhere in my name whatsoever! Even Spanish speakers get it right! * The Swiss French tend to completely mangle my last name. It's an english word, Household. We've gotten Oosehold, Househoo, Odleblir (??) and O-oh. This includes spelling. They then tell us that we need to make our name more French. Thanks, Mr. Vandelkov, I can see you don't take your own advice. Oddly, the French from France have no problem with Household, even though the spoken language basically lacks an H.

* I have been called everything from [[FacePalm Charlotte to Emma]] (when my name is actually [[MyNaymeIs Courtenay]]), and not ONCE have I appeared in a yearbook with the correct spelling of my name. Heck, one time I didn't even make it ''in the freaking yearbook''. * For whatever reason, people keep calling me "Erik" as opposed to Aaron. [[{{Ptitlei015gc004kw4}} And don't even get me started on the misspellings...]] * For many years back in the early/mid 2000's this troper used the user "Outwar Dragon" which was a reference to an RPG he enjoyed. Most sits at the time required no spaces so "OutwarDragon" was the norm, but if it ever lost the second capitalization then forever I was known as "Outward." Never could tell if it was them seeing a second D, thought I was being clever and having them share one letter, or thought it was "Outward Ragon" [[{{Tropers/Gazooki}} This Troper's]] last name is pronounced "Hallsall", not "Hassle" or "Hal-sall" (although that's how you spell it). Butchered spellings of said surname include Hassall, Halls All (the letter began with 'Dear Mr. All') and on a christmas card I got "Househall". My street name also qualifies for this, not only is it on an estate just off a lane with the same name, so people often end up outside someone else's door if they don't have directions, it's prone to being misspelled as either "Dummers", "Dumas" or in one case "Drummers". * This troper was cursed with so many annoying things with this trope. Number one, no one can pronounce my name the way it is written Schuyler. In America, everyone spells it "Skyler" or "Skylar" or something like that, but his ''hilarious'' parents used the Dutch spelling despite the fact that there's not a drop of Dutch blood in me, nor have any of my family lived in the Netherlands, leading to having everyone read it off as "Shooler" (I was even asked once, "Is it Shooler or Shwyler?"). Then there's the fact that since Skyler even when spelled the Eagleland way is uncommon, everyone thinks that my name is Tyler. The corollary to this is nobody can spell it correctly either, and ''everybody'' comments on how weird of a name that is to spell, because I totally have [[NeverHeardThatOneBefore]], let alone all the people asking me why I spell it that way, or why my name isn't Tyler. Then there's the next fun part of explaining to people that this is in fact my ''middle name'', which is what I've been called by all my life (My family never calls me by my first name). ---Hey, [[ReportSiht Rapport Sith]], why don't you go back to MyNameIsNotDurwood? ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MyNaymeIs * To those of you who don't have this problem and think of anyone who complains about it to be whining over a small problem, try to imagine what it would be like if ''every'' time someone read/heard your name, they absolutely ''had'' to mention it, make fun of it, or give you a

particular look. ''Every. Single. Time.'' It gets old ''very'' quickly. ** And that's not even mentioning misspellings. * My name is Shayn, which is clearly a more phonetic version of "Shane". I have ''never'', not even once, had my name spelt or pronounced properly. I've been called Shaun, Shay, Shaw, Shannon and Sharyn(I am a guy). In high school, I was placed in an ''all-girls class'' because they thought it was Sharyn. It doesn't have a meaning, and it is the name of a small crater on the moon. My brother ended up with "Cayle, which is much, ''much'' better. * This troper has a classmate who spelt their name as Tayla. They may have been messing about, but it was used consistently. * [[{{Wulf}} This troper]]'s [[MyNaymeIs nayme]] (Toney) is never spelled correctly on the first attempt, due to that extra 'e' in there. Apparently, even the bank seems to think that 'e' is a figment of my imagination, since my debit card came without it. Even though I wrote it out no less than three times... and signed it... * This troper's name is Riley. It has been heard by others as Bradley, Rahleigh, Reeley, Really, and once misspelled on a letter as Rilert. I am extremely curious about that last one. ** R and T are right next to Y on the keyboard. This troper's best guess is that the writer wasn't typing carefully (and may have had fat fingers) and ended up hitting both keys at the same time instead of the Y. * Mine is spelled Nic. Every single person I know uses a K at the end. ** Do I know you? * This Troper tends to have his name spelled as "Sacha" rather than "Sasha". Although there was one memorable occasion on which a very clueless classmate spelled it "Satia". (And just in case I didn't make it clear earlier this Troper is a guy) ** [[{{Aryn}} This Other Troper]], who also has a nayme, remembers hearing that Sasha is a guy's name in Russian. * [[{{gs68}} This troper]] gets a little bugged if his primary nickname is written as anything other than "{{gs68}}." Sadly, limitations on wikis force it to be spelled as "[=Gs68=]." * Interesting inversion: "Megan" is the most common spelling, but I've had it spelled "Meghan", "Meagan", ''"Magen"''... It's to the point that I jump up and hug anyone who spells it right on the first try. * "Erick" seems to give people fits. Spellchecker hates my guts; on official math team name tags, I was Eric despite telling the official state secretary that it is Erick multiple times; no one can get it right even after I spell it for them. The list goes on, but the most impressive one comes from college applications. I filled out the common application, and submitted it. Almost all of the supplements, including the college that did this error, asked for my name again. So when I get an e-mail addressed to Eric asking for a little more material, I was amazed that they made that error. The best part? That college was ''Harvard''. ** ThisTroper has a friend named Aerica. It's pronounced like Erica. *** That's an awesome name. * "M a t t h e [[BerserkButton U]] w" ''[[BerserkButton They got my fucking Social Security Card wrong!]]''

* About three in five people either misspell or mispronounce [[QuantumToast this troper]]'s surname on the first try. To be fair, it's a pretty unusual one, particularly if you don't know many fantasy authors. ** What is it? My name is an old Finnish one, that everyone thinks is spanish. * This troper's husband's middle name is Mathew -- only one T. Even the newspaper "corrected" it when they printed the engagement announcement. * Catherine, Cathryn, Kathryn, Kathrin, and Catherin are ''all wrong''. And yet they've popped up on everything from newspaper articles to prescription labels. * This troper's name is Matthew yet my library card says "Mathew". Even a couple of school certificates says "Mathew" in my primary years (well, thank God teachers in high school/college know how to spell!). * My sister's name is Jacqueline. In elementary school, when they all had to give each other valentine cards, ''every single card was spelled differently''. I call her Jac for short, but then some people spell it [[BerserkButton Jack]]. ** Are you me? Of course, I spell my sister's nickname Jacq and she goes by Jacqui...but still. ** Just be glad that it's not spelled Jacquelyn, like it is for [[{{Sparkysharps}} this troper]]. ** Speaking of Jacquelyns, [[DesertDragon this troper]] did not know how to spell his own mother's name until he was like 18. The mail always got it wrong, and one day this troper just so happened to catch on when she was spelling her name to somebody over the phone. It wasn't the first time she did this and this troper wasn't even paying attention, but for some reason, it dawned on him that she had been spelling her name with a Y this whole time. * This editor met a guy at work whose name badge said "Schuyler." When asked how on Earth that's pronounced, he replied "Skyler." Sadly, I myself am stuck with boring old "Brad." The most I could do is add a second D or spell my full name as "Bradli," but that looks so stupid I can't believe I just typed it. * This troper has weird parents who did not know that the "-esha" names would become popular while she grew up. They named her "Letitia", which comes from the original French name "Leticia". It is pronounced "Lu-tee-sha". This troper is now twenty and has no longer bothered trying to correct people when they read her name on paper because 90% of the time, they say "Le-tit-tia". Ask MyWayEntertainment. They know. * [[TheBadWolf This editor]] had a friend in college who changed the spelling of her name from "Kate" to "Kayt" so it would "be more phonetic." ** Similarly, this troper grew up with a girl named Katie who in high school suddenly decided her name was Kayti. * The propensity for faux-ethnic naming this editor has picked up on, complete with apostrophes, excessive use of "q"s, and whatnot. * This troper once had a girlfriend named Alyssan, pronounced just as Alison. Alyssan has since gone on to name her son Mykkil, which this troper still refuses to believe is a "Michael" variant.

** This troper has seen all sorts of variants on "Michael", mostly in sports. (Mychal is a common one, and there's even been a [=JerMychal=]. * This troper has two female cousins accidentally named Nicholas and James. And a male cousin whose legal middle name is Nicole. Needless to say, this troper's uncle Carl can't spell. * This troper has a cousin whose mother spelled her name Desire' on the birth certificate. Not Desir or Desire, but Desire'. Resulting in the unfortunate family nickname, "Desire-Mark." * This Troper has had so many people ask him if his last name is spelled 'like the Crocodile Hunter' that he now introduces himself as "Erwin ee-are-doubleyou-eye-in" whenever he gives his full name. This Troper has two gs in her surname. When people don't make references to livestock or vegetables, they tend to forget the second g. Now, when I'm asked for my surname, I spell it anyway. * My high school could never get my name, "Jaime," right. They always placed the "i" after the "m" instead of before it. My mom's last name was also often misspelled or misread due to consisting almost entirely of consonants. * Apparently there isn't a single person in the world outside this Troper's family who can spell and/or pronounce our last name properly! (It's Kolano, Khol-aun-oh!) * This troper once heard a story about someone who was substitute teaching in an inner-city school. She paused on one name, spelled "Aa." "Ah-uh?" Turns out it's pronounced "Adasha." ** [[http://www.snopes.com/racial/language/le-a.asp False.]] * I've had weird experiences with this kind of thing. My name's Virginia; not spelt with a y or a j or anything, just an old-fashioned name. In primary school, there were teachers who assumed that this was a misprint because it's an uncommon name for children nowadays. They would insist on calling me Victoria or Veronica until I convinced them that that Virginia was, indeed, my real name. * This troper's last name is [[XtremeKoolLetterz Straughan]], one of those [[HomestarRunner cuh-razy]] Scottish names, and it's pronounced "Strawn"... if someone hears it out loud, they naturally think it's spelled that way. If they read it from text, they tend to say something really, really awkward sounding "Straw-ghan? Stray-can? Strakkan?". Turns out it's derived from a Scottish locale named "Strachan", which is pronounced like "Strawn" as well. This troper's father always assumed it meant something [[RatedMForManly supermanly]], but sadly, this troper (God I hate saying that, let's just say "I" on the Troper Tales page, alright? Oh wait, TvTropes is SeriousBusiness), did some research on the name... and it means "Valley of the Little Horse", which brought much sadness. Yes, I might as well be called Joseph MyLittlePony. It's possible-''possible''- that it could meant little as in "young". * Internet handles and usernames count, right? This troper goes by {{Kjorteo}}. Enough said. * A cousin of mine is named "Emmaleigh" (Emily) * This troper's name is Johnathan. Yes, with an H and an A. This concept would appear to be beyond the mental faculties of the public at large, as he has had it misspelled on too many occasions to count.

Why is that so complicated? Granted, he is at least better off than his friend Czeslaw... * This Troper's mother is named Moria, and pronounced Mo-REE-uh. It's often mistaken for the much more common Maria, or else mispronounced as Mor-EYE-uh. The latter actually makes more sense than the former: it's a Hebrew name (of the mountain in TheBible where God commanded Abraham to sacrifice his son Issac, but stopped him from doing so), which is more commonly transliterated to English as Moriah and pronounced the latter way. Maria is actually an unrelated name, the Latinized form of Miriam. ** This troper would've thought with the LordOfTheRings movies you'd have less problems with Moria. * This Troper's first name is Vikram, but usually just goes by "Vik". Of course, everybody just writes down Vic, which doesn't bother him so much, and he doesn't even bother correcting them anymore. Other times, people trying to be formal/respectful call him Victor, which DOES get on his nerves just a little bit. * Is "Nathanson" really so hard to spell/pronounce? Because we get stuff addressed to "Nathansen", "Nathenson", and the always-popular "Matthis", along with telemarketers pronouncing our last name Matthis, Matheson, Natheson...or even getting all the letters right but still using a short a. It's ''NAY''-than-son!" And, of course, we get a few people thinking that they're talking to someone named Nathan. (I am ''so'' naming my first-born son Nathan, just so I can respond to one of these telemarketers by putting a toddler on the phone. I'll give him a really awesome middle name to compensate, of course, so when he's older he has the option of turning his first name into an initial like his great-grandfather, ''my'' namesake, did. (Grandpa went by "I. Charles Nathanson." The I was for Irving. I got named after the Charles part.) ** This troper also had a friend in high school who insisted that his name was written "Zac"--"not 'Zac-k', and not '[[GashBell Zach]]'", a lampshading of how weird the normal dimunitives of Zachary would sound if pronounced phonetically. * My name is Jeff'''er'''y, not Jeff'''re'''y... although I won't blame you if you get wrong because I wasn't totally sure 'till I 8. * This troper's name is Rebecca, but people always spell it as Rebeccah, Rebekkah, and so on. But it would be stupid to call myself Becky, because the initials would then be BJ. ** Similar case for This Troper, except everyone spells her name as "Rebbecca". Ironically, that was an actual typo on her birth certificate before they went back and fixed it. Additionally, people often insist on calling her Becky, no matter that she loathes the diminutive with a passion. ** Whereas this Troper's name is Rebekah but people always seem to spell it 'Rebecca' or, horror of all horrors, immediately call me 'Becky'. * [[PhoenixFire My]] first name is Welsh and my last name is Scottish. If people see it written, I usually end up telling them to pretend the Y is an I and that the CK in the middle of my last name doesn't exist. I immediately sympathized with [[UminekoNoNakuKoroNi Ushiromiya Battler]] just because he also has the people responsible for his name

at the top of his "must-kill" list. * This Troper's name is Jacquelyn, or preferably, Jackie. She's had her named spelled Jaclyn, Jaqueline, Jacquelin, Jacqui, and, in a truly wall banger moment, Jaci. ''By a teacher she'd had for seven months.'' This isn't even counting the time she was given her state standardized grade testing packet and had her name spelled Jacquely. Because apparently, if your name is longer than eight letters, you're just screwed. * This troper's first name is Bryce. [[BerserkButton NOT Brice]]. (I've even seen someone spell it "Brys", which is [[SoBadItsGood marginally funnier]] in this troper's opinion.) * This troper suspects that Welsh names must be very prone to this. The name 'Rhiannon', for example, can turn into Rhianna, Reanna, Rianna, Rihanna, Rhianne, Rianne, Reanne, Rehanna, Rehannan, Leanne, Leanna, Brianne, Brianna, Liana, Diana, Katherine and -- this troper's personal favourite -- Brian. Combine this with a middle name with a 'y' in and a surname that can be mangled in another half a different ways, and hilarity tends to ensue. ** This Troper's name is Rhiannon and gets that ALL THE TIME. Especially Reannon. ** You have no idea how good it is to know I'm not the only Rhiannon who has gotten "Brian" before. The most annoying mispronunciations are when they read the name on paper and say "Rhianna" or "Brianna." No that little "on" at the end is not pronounced like an "a", DAMMIT! * This troper enjoys watching teachers and peers try to pronounce/spell her name, Reighann. She's gotten the spellings [=RayAnn=], Reiann, Rehann, Reganne. The most common pronunciation is 'Rai-GEE-ann.' -.* Holy CRAP another person named Reighann( well, its my middle name but still) its even spelt the same.. IM NOT ALONE * This tropers has a friend named Elliott. That's two L's, and two T's. No one EVER gets it right. * This troper's last name is spelled M-I-C-H-E. NOT M-I-C-K-E-Y. * This troper's name is "Alexandrea." Not Alexandra, not Alexandria. Alexandrea. But that's nothing compared to some of Navafauxlish (Fake Navajo/English) names she's seen around her school. And once, she knew a Hindu boy who's name was Peru. * This troper's name is "Connor". It is routinely misspelt as "Conner" and "Conor" by everyone, including his teachers and friends (friends who have known me for years, mind). * This troper named Marisa has seen her named spelled Marissa, Marrisa, Merissa, Merrissa, Mirisa, and plenty of other ways. Even now into her 20s her aunts and cousins still get her name wrong on Christmas and birthday cards. Also her friend, named Aisling frequently gets it spelled or pronounced like Ashley. ** I bet the {{Touhou}} fans get it right, but pronounce it [[GratuitousJapanese "Mah-Ree-Sa."]] Also, a self-demonstrating example, [[{{Aryn}} the editor]] who wrote this snark. ** This troper feels your pain, as her name is also 'Marisa', (and it is pronounced "Mah-Ree-Sa"). I'd like to add some more mutilations for the list, though: Mariesa, Marcia, Marisha, Maricia, Mari-sa. It's become a RunningGag in the family to see how my grandmother spells my

name each year on the Christmas cards because it's always something different. * This troper has three examples ** My mother's maiden name, which she goes by rather than my father's name since their divorce, is Westendorp. This has been spelled Westendarp, Wastendorp, and, I kid you not, Wentebdrop ** My Father's name is Thom, spoken "Tom" ** My step mother is named Andra, though she is often mistaken for "Andrea" * This Troper's first name is Myfanwy, which is a Welsh name that's been in use for around a thousand years. She's been given every conceivable misspelling at one time or another, starting with MyFanwy and finishing up with strange things with Vs and Us in them. The mispronunciations by people who've only seen it written out are worse. It's actually pronounced muh-VAN-wi, rhyming with 'can we'. * This Troper has several examples: ** In Sweden, it's quite common to have two surnames, and the standard is to have a hyphen between them. I have two surnames, but no hyphen. Apparently, that's very hard to understand, since my surname is CONSTANTLY being spelled Landin-Dillner or Landindillner. Furthermore, those particular surnames are both quite unusual (as is my first name), resulting in "I'm sorry, can you say that again, please?" whenever and to whoever I introduce myself. ** My friend's surname is ''Jungermann'', which people always spell ''Ljungerman''. Kind of justified though, since there is at least one Swedish surname that is pronounced ''yung'' but spelled ''ljung''. Also, double Ns at the end of words are quite unusual. ** My grandmother's maiden name was ''Jansson'' (a very common Swedish surname), but her niece spells it ''Janzon''. Everyone always gets it wrong. ** My brother's first name is Teddy, which everyone always thinks is a nickname. Whenever he introduces himself, people automatically assume that his real name is Theodore. *** This troper has a friend called Vicky, which she told me is what's written on her birth certificate. Apparently, people assume that it's short for Victoria, which she hates being called by. * This troper goes by Nic. I have so many people spell it with a K that I accidently did so myself recently. Probably doesn't help that my signature looks like NK B~~y~~~~/ roughly. * This troper's friend's name is Stefan. Like the... Russian, I guess, I don't know. Pronounced STEH-fen. All of my non-mutual friends (who haven't actually met him, mind you) insist on calling him steh-FAHN. Other friends just call him Steven. * [[{{MiraShio}} My]] real first name isn't exactly common, which is why people tend to misspell it and/or mispronounce it on the first try. Doesn't make the urge to swat them any less powerful. * My real name is usually spelled with just one S, but my dad thought "two looks nicer". My ''pediatrician'' felt this was a bad idea, and sure enough not one teacher has pronounced my name right the first try (if I have to have my name said aloud, IE for a Starbucks order, I omit the extra S). I can't ''imagine'' what my foreign-named relatives went through, let alone my cousin -- out of [[OneSteveLimit all the

Laurens]] I know, she's the only ''Lorin.'' * This troper's last name is misspelled in the ''phone book'', and has been on almost every 'award' she's won at school as well. Not to mention, no one can ever seem to properly pronounce or spell (one or the other) my first name...... * My name's been misspelled Lindsay, Lindsey, Lindsy, Linsay, Linsey, etc. It's Lynsey. No "I", no "D". Lynsey. Is it really that hard to spell? * This troper's friend's first name is spelt with a 'ie' on the end. She's had her name spelt as Emily, Emmerleigh, Emmalee, you name it, she's had it spelt like it. It was no wonder that she gets a bit touchy when it's misspelt. * This Troper's name is DARYL. Not DARRYL, not DARRELL or DARREL or DERROL, or worse, DARLY. Good Lord, if this troper had a dollar for every time someone misspelt his name as DARLY, he'd be a damned rich man by now. * This troper's legal first name is Lauren. Pretty easy, right? Wrong. It's been spelled "Loren" by family members as well as friends on more than one occasion, and my ''hospital records'' bear the name "Lauran". It could be spelled wrong on my birth certificate for all I know. Fed Ex once gave my name a ''whole extra syllable'' -- Laruren!! * I know a boy named Kam-ron. A name spelled as its phonetic form, for convenience? * My name's commonly spelled "Ian". My mother appended an "E" to the start, because she believed people would mispronounce the common spelling. I've been, occasionally, referred to as "Ethan", but not often. Oh, and recently, I met another "Eian" during a shift at my workplace. He was just as surprised as me. * This troper's name is Rebekah Leigh, her sister's name is Jacqueline and her second-youngest cousin's name is Caely (pronounced KAY-lee) * This troper's middle name is not Spanish/Italian, her mother did not forget the "h", and no, it's not like the singer. It is the old english Maria pronounced Mah-RYE-ah. Also, her first name has an "a" at the end. She hates it when people call her the name of a popular fabric store. I'm not even going to get into the completely off pronunciation some people like to give her relatively simple name! * This troper's name is Kaila. It's not pronounced like Kayla. It's pronounced KYE-lah. People always mispronounce it. ** My cousin is called Kaila too, and my name is Kayla. my mum still mispronounces Kaila as Kayla though. It makes things very confusing. * [[{{Poptart}} This troper]] once knew a boy who went by the name Andie, pronounced An-DIE. He was...[[EmoTeen quite a character]]. * This troper is Amy. A very common name, so you'd think that people would stop misspelling it. I've had 'Aimee' from a number of people, and 'Emi' (which I actually like better) from Japanese and Indonesian people. Also, my surname is Macintyre, not MacIntyre or, god forbid, McIntyre. EVERYBODY capitalises the I, even if they've been corrected multiple times. It may be because all formal documents are completed in block letters, so everyone assumes it's a capital I. ** I don't know about Indonesian, but Emi is a Japanese name. * This troper's name is Janay. Not Janae, or Jany, or Janey, or Janai/Ja Nai (yes, really), or Jenay. J-A-N-A-Y. And it doesn't help

that most people I know that share the same name has one of the above alternate spellings. * My name is Madelaine. I don't know how many people have spelled it "Madeline". It's one of my [[BerserkButton Berserk Buttons]]. ** I know your pain. I'm Madeleine yet people spell it your your example of Madelein. I don't get mad if they spell it wrong...[[BerserkButton but pronoce it......]] * This troper has the simple name of "Adam", but someone spelled it as "Adme". Cue confused look as she hands me a christmas card. Although, this was the same girl who pronounced the spanish word "Comica" as "Comicora" * A friend of this troper's once knew a girl whose name was pronounced "Nadasha", a little different maybe but fair enough. Her name was actually spelled "Na--a", on her God damned birth certificate and all. * Generally all this troper has to put up with is having her name misspelled as Caitlin, Kaitlyn, or Caitlyn, when it's spelled actually Kaitlin. However, this troper one saw her name written as Katelynn. This troper still doesn't understand how that last one came to be. ** I'm a Caitlin who goes by Caitie and I've really grown to hate the letter K over the years due to how many times people have attempted to put it (or a Y) into my name. Also: TWO I'S. I've gotten to the point where I have to point to my face, and the fact that I don't wear an eyepatch, to drive the point home. * My last name is "Groce" pronounced like gross but it lends to more confusion as people try to pronounce it as Gro-CEE, Gro-CHE, or Grace (which I will never understand how that's the most common mispronunciation.) The mistake is so common, I already have an unconscious routine for whenever people ask so they know pronunciation and spelling. "Groce. G-r-o-c-e" ** Just say: Groce, as in "Grocer". * This troper once had a teacher whose first name was Katje. Pronounced "Katie". Supposedly, when she was born someone wrote down her name in script, made a stray pen mark, and her parents thought it was cute. * [[BerserkButton My name is WIL, not WILL! JESUS GFJIODFJIKGNDFL.]] I mean, seriously. I've hardly ever met someone who knows how to spell my name the first time without being told to drop the second L. Even after I wrote it myself, on the same piece of paper! * My brother, who is only young and not good at writing yet, plays Sims. His Sims are named something like dfpgg and posiehrtgs but their names are pronounced AliceAndBob * My name is Mark: M-A-R-Z-W-I-L-K, the number 24, and the letter X! Marzwilk24x * As a StealthParody of other girls in our class having (or else suddenly affecting) these kinds of names, someone I knew in high school went from being Denise to Dqenise, the latter pronounced with a silent q. She got listed in the yearbook that way and everything. * This Troper who happens to be named Caitlin goes by Caitie, which of course is rife with its own problems. If I could count how many times it's been bastardized... (and it's the original version of the name, too!) * This troper's father is a high school biology teacher. One year he

had a student whose name is La-a. [[spoiler:The dash is ''not'' silent. It's "Ladasha".]] ** That sounds just a bit familiar... >> http://www.snopes.com/racial/language/le-a.asp * Mine's Madelene instead of Madeline, got it from my Grandma. Haven't met anyone who spells it my way, probably because it's supposed to be pronounced 'mad-leen' but she changed it since everyone pronounced it wrong. * This troper's name is Allison. No matter how many times she reminds them that it is spelled with two L's and an I, certain people will persistently get it wrong, or call her Alice or Alyssa. The fact that her surname is technically French but has been horribly mangled over the past 400 years doesn't help either. * This tropette knew a girl named Krystn. * My neighbor's dog's name is Phideaux. ** As in "Fido"? That sounds pretty cool. * This troper - Sheila isn't a very common name as it is, but with two "e"s it's even worse. Add her last name being sort of unpronounceable, and you have problems. Funnily, her parents picked "Sheela" because they thought that Americans would be able to pronounce it... they just can't spell it. * This troper is working on an original story with [[MeaningfulName vague meaningful references]] to the RobinHood legend. However, one of the characters that I actually named after that aforementioned titular character had her name spelled as "Robynn" instead of "Robin", partly to differentiate the names in gender a bit. My friends didn't even notice this when we started roleplaying in chat, so when they started consistently spelling the name wrong I just casually pointed it out to them. They protested that names with y's that replace i's and additional n's were useless and silly and stupid and irritating. Cue wallbanger, and me feeling a bit down over it. * My name is Alada (pronounced Uh-Lay-duh) and spell check refuses to admit that my name exists, also every single teacher i have ever had has either pronounced it as Uh-lah-duh or, on rare occasions, Amanda. Really? Amanda? That's not even close. One time a teacher pronounced my name correctly during role call and i didn't answer because I wasn't familiar with the sound of someone saying my name correctly. shoot me. -__* First and middle name? Simple. Spelled the same in most western languages. Last name? Obscure as hell Anglisized Welsh clan name Staley. I've been called Stanley, Stale, Bailey, Stoly... * As anyone with the name Tyler can testify many people have called me Taylor Which is smart if you wanna make me annoyed quickly * This troper's name is Haley. NOT Hailey, Hayley, Haiyley, Haleigh or Haily, but that's what I get. * Invoked as a throwaway gag by a GM in a D&D game this troper was a part of. As part of a sidequest, a random NPC had asked us to find his lost dog, Phydeaux (which is pronounced the exact same as Fido). * This troper is Taylor. Apparently it's not a very masculine name, so everyone assumes that I'm ''mispronouncing my own name,'' and calls me "Tyler". On another note, my brother Cody is often called "Cory", and everyone spells my sister Meagan's name as "Megan" or see how it's

spelled and call her "Mee-aygan". * Why is it too much to expect of people to know the difference between "Juli''a''" and "Jul''ie''"? There's an A at the end, dammit! What am I, a frikin' {{anime}} character? ** [[CompletelyMissingThePoint That's... not an anime name...]] * My name's Kerrie. Not "Kerry" or even "Kerri", it's Kerr''ie''. One time I ordered some shoes on the internet. When filling in my details, I of course, spelt my name the correct way. Yet when I finally recieved the package it was still somehow addressed to "Kerry"! [[WallBanger Those twits thought I'd spelt my own name wrong!]] * Some people give their children really unique spellings of names, I have seen some pretty strange ones. I parodied this in a story I wrote about a school, with some names such as Stacee, MacKynzee, Kaidyn, then went with some very weird names, one kid ended up being called J'aeLynn. * Hi. I'm Courtenay. Not Courtney. Not Courtaney. Not Courtnay. Not... y'know, stuff it. Just call me CJ. * This Troper has a classmate named Kahla. It's pronounced "Kay - la". Some substitute teachers will try to pronounce her name like "Call a". * This Troper's name is Skylyn. S K Y L Y N Not Skylynn Not Skylin. Skylyn is the most common variant. It means Cloud. * Invoked in [[SlvstrChung This troper]]'s former webcomic, which featured a ValleyGirl ShallowLoveInterest named "Typhphaanii". (And before y'all get up in arms about me making fun of names, go over to the TroperTales page for "[[TroperTales Military Alphabet]]", where the first entry details my adventures in this same domain.) * This Troper works with a guy named Aksyl. That's right. ---Return to [[{{MyNaymeIs}} My ]][[strike: [[{{MyNaymeIs}} Name ]]]][[strike: [[{{MyNaymeIs}} Naime ]]]][[{{MyNaymeIs}} Nayme Is]]. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

MyNewGiftIsLame * [[RedneckRocker This troper]] and his brother usually gets gift cards to places like Target, a restaurant, or a bookstore from his grandparents. Part of the reason is that we live several states away, and only see each other about 2-3 times a year. This way, we have a choice as to what we can get for Christmas, and Grandma and Grandpa don't have to worry about me and my bro being disappointed. * RealLife: This troper and her brother for Christmas a couple years ago, received old DVD's their dad got for half price. Brother unwraps his first, and reveals ThisIsSpinalTap. This troper, however, opens hers to find ThePrincessBride. Not knowing any better, she then outright states "how come I get the sucky one?". She soon finds that ThePrincessBride was the better of the two. * This Troper's grandmother always gave two presents at Christmas: An outfit and a toy (turning to cash later in life). The outfit was

always in a Macy's box. One Christmas, this troper was given two boxes. The first was the Macy's box with the predictable clothes and the second was... another Macy's box. Cue massive amounts of crying as the thought of the previous night's conversation about being too old for toys (in reality it was my grandfather messing with his grandkids, but when your 5, you take that stuff seriously)sunk in. My father actually had to open the lid and show me that the clothes box actually held the complete set of Transformers toys to make a GiantCombiningMecha. There was much rejoicing and to this date, when possible, all my family puts all the fun presents in Macy's clothes boxes just to rib me. ** You got ''[[TransformersGeneration1 Devastator]]''? Best Christmas Ever! ** That's the one. I also got Optimus Prime on Christmas Day (Grandparents gifts are given about a week or two in advance, due to travel issues.) and I got to take both toys to church. How many Christmas' have you had where Optimus saves the baby Jesus from Decepticons, hm? * One Christmas, this troper - a [[MostTropersAreYoungNerds young nerd]] - unwrapped that year's great new computer game... and promptly burst into tears, thinking that it had been chosen by the less techsavvy of her parents who hadn't realised that this game would never run on her ancient steam-powered PC. She hadn't noticed the ''bigger'' box under the tree. The game was supposed to be a hint. ** I want a steam powered computer now. Oh-so-badly, since that would be terribly, horribly ''awesome''. *** It's not hard. Take a regular computer and plug it in in an area where steam is one of the steps to creating power (coal, solar, nuclear, etc.). * This past Christmas (Christmas 2008) this troper received...a calligraphy kit. EVERY year though, she seems to get bath supplies. Every single year without fail since age thirteen. It's to the point where they're like the ties on Father's Day. ** This troper typically gets pyjamas from at least one person per year, even when she doesn't need them. She doesn't mind because the pants are ''always'' soft and fluffy and warm, just like she likes them even in the summer. * This troper got a really girly beauty kit for his birthday once that was given to him by a girl named Zara who is a bit of a Ditz and a CloudCuckooLander. He was disgusted by this so he returned it back to her. Yes, he's THAT evil! ** You should have asked if she wanted help with her makeup. Or were you too young for that kind of innuendo? * This troper has a grandmother and an uncle who are notoriously bad gift-givers; one Christmas gift from them consisted of a toothbrush holder(with smiley faces on it), tacky plastic jewelry, and pajamas that didn't even fit. * One Christmas, this troper got almost nothing except socks and sweaters. The most comfortable socks and sweaters ever made. * This troper, until she was about fifteen, tended to get typical girly things for Christmas from her relatives, primarily clothes she would never get caught in. While her brother and cousins (all male)

got really cool robot toys and games and, on one occasion, freaking awesome pocket knives. * This troper once got math flash cards as a gift, either for birthday or Christmas (forget which). She was pissed and refused to use them. * This troper and his sister are expert at accidentally buying sucky presents for each other (you'd think they'd know each other's tastes after growing up together, but no). As an example he once stated that he liked every season of BTVS but the last, guess what she had got him as a Christmas present. He also hates Twilight with a passion, guess which series has been given to him one book at a time at each Birthday and Christmas. He, OTOH, is so sick of her complaining that he now gives her a gift card to her favorite CD/DVD shop so she can damn-well choose her own present! 'Personal touch' be damned! * On a half-related note, this male troper would love some bath supplies for christmas, as he always feels rather awkward when buying them. * [[TheTallOne This Tropette's]] grandfather gave my older brothers batteries for Christmas every year. When I was about 5, I opened a pack of batteries and burst into tears of joy. I'd always perceived batteries as a "big kid" gift, and I was so happy that I was finally a big kid, and old enough to get batteries for Christmas. Good times, good times. * This troper's two boys were enlisted to subvert this trope. When visiting a mall Santa both were more than happy to answer the fat man's question with, "Socks and underwear." Even after being pressed by the confused elf, both boys kept giving the same answer. This troper had to chew on his tongue to avoid laughing; this troper's wife was less amused. ** That sounds like something [[PentiumMMX2 this troper]] would have done as a kid. * [[TragicTheDragon This Tropette]] (love it; stealing it) can't stand Secret Santa parties for this very reason, both on the receiving ''and'' giving end (does probability ''ever'' work in anyone's favor here or does everyone manage to pick that one person you've only encountered twice instead of their best friend?) As far as the lamest gift she's ever received recently, how about a book of clip art? Clip art done in a "let's draw everything like they do in them Annie-may things the kids like" style. With an entire section dedicated to {{Elegant Gothic Lolita}}s (they clearly had no idea what that even means). Bonus: This troper is a ''freelance illustrator''. Imagine giving your chef friend a booklet of gift certificates to [=McDonald's=] and you'll understand why this was incredibly awkward. * Several years ago this troper got the most horribly ugly sweater from her aunt. Luckily it came in handy this year when she wore it to her college Christmas party and won first place in the Ugly Sweater Contest. * [[PentiumMMX2 This troper]] has had it happen a few times over the years. Here's some examples I can remember: ** I remember one year, when my grandma gave my older sister was given a Barbie dollhouse (Not the big $100+ ones, but one of the smaller $20 ones), while I just got two Hot Wheels from her (Which probably only cost her $2). However, I was too young to care at the time; I was just

happy having more Hot Wheels. ** There was Christmas 2001, where I opened up one gift to find some 3rd party Game Boy Color accessories given to me by my parents. I thanked them, as I though to myself "What where they thinking? I don't have a Game Boy Color; just my Game Boy Pocket which is on it's last legs". Lo and behold, the next gift I unwrapped was, in fact, a Game Boy Color. ** Also, I remember one year that for my birthday (though a month away, we also celebrated my sister's birthday as well), my uncle gave me a bunch of college textbooks and my sister a freaking laptop. Sure, the laptop was used, but it also showed that he put effort into her gift (The laptop was cleaned up, had its system restore disc, and even had a birthday card included. My gift seemed like something he though of at the last minute). ** Out of all the people who gave me gifts, my youngest aunt on my mom's side of the family never seemed capable of giving me a good gift. Some examples include getting a bunch of little kid books at age 8 (stuff that I read when I was 4), a cheap Bingo set at age 10 (they didn't even remove the price sticker, showing that they only spent $1 on me), and cologne at age 12 (probably because my older cousin wore it at the time). Thankfully, she just gives me cash now, which is a lot better. * Ugh, this troper's parents - and lately younger brother - love doing this. Two incidents stick out in my mind. One was on my eleventh birthday in 2005, when I received a ginormous box. I opened the wrapping, and it was a printer. Recognising the box from elsewhere in the house, I continued digging through more boxes, wrapping, and bags and came across a copy of Super Mario 64 DS. I was stunned; I didn't have a DS. Then came the real present, hidden behind a cushion. It was actually rather heartwarming as once my father said (after I had been particularly disobedient) that he would never get me a DS and, well, he did. The second was just last Christmas, 2009, where my brother got me a fairly large box. Upon opening it, it was a boot box. Being [[GenreSavvy knowledgeable enough]] about this trick, I calmly opened it up to reveal a huge candle and a loosely wrapped gift. Inside the wrapped tupperwear box, digging through a whole bunch of newspaper, I had received the copy of Akira I was eyeing for a while. Oh, another instance (I guess) was when my Dad got me a tablet for my tenth birthday. It's not as good as the ones we have today but I'm appreciative now, even when back then I was severely disappointed because I just wanted more games. * This troper, at age nine, was very upset that her brother had gotten a new video game for Hanukkah when she had gotten a book. That book? HarryPotterAndTheSorcerersStone. ** So... was this good or bad? * For This Troper's birthday this year, (2010) the first gift she opened was a small box... That apparently held a thing for putting retainers in. Her parents said that she was getting braces for her birthday, and that she had an appointment with the dentist later in the day. They got her to open the box, though, and inside was a purple iPod Nano. It was one of the best gifts she'd gotten in years! ** And actually, a similar thing happened this last Christmas. The

first gift was still in the box it had been delivered to the house in. This Troper looked at the labels to see where it came from and saw that it was some company in Pennsylvania. She goes to Lancaster with her family about once a year, so she figured that it was some kind of candle or something, which her mom seemed obsessed with. An okay gift, but not really something she wanted... However, upon opening the box she discovered that they were actually bags of [[Series/DoctorWho Jelly Babies]]! She was amazed that her family had picked up on how obsessed she'd become with Doctor Who in the past four months or so. * That's nothing, my parents always get me [=McDonald's=] for Christmas... ** [[{{Retsupurae}} Billy!?]] * This troper always seems to get things she hates. He's always receiving clothing from her aunts. Very ''feminine'' and tight clothing. He's also lately been receiving bath products. * When this Troper was in Girl Scouts, they did a Secret Santa-like gift exchange. Everyone got some sort of toy or game. My gift? A diary, the same kind as one I already had. * My brother and his wife are ridiculously bad at gifts. One year I got a poster for a Heavy Metal band that I detest and recently they gave me a frigging furniture store gift card (seriously). But I suppose that beats saying your giving an Amazon voucher and then "forgetting". Cash or GTFO from now on. * One Christmas, my 5- year old cousin twins got about 3-4 DS games each(most of them were shovelware, but still, getting games is getting games). My wishlist was filled with various Wii and DS games, still I got none. Needless to say, I was kind of jealous. (Nowadays I usually get at least one game.) ** Before I got the Wii, and wished for one for Christmas, I got a Xbox 360 instead. It was kind of awkward telling "yeah, this is nice and all, and I understand it's a big and expensive gift, but... I've told you all the time I wanted a Wii, and it doesn't really have any games I like, so... yeah..." We kept the Xbox, mostly for my brother since it was for us both, and he liked the games on it better, and I bought a Wii later. (Now I've even found a few... ''FEW'' Xbox games I like. Mirror's Edge, for example, is great.) *** When I was 10, I got a Barbie doll from a friend. I have never, and still haven't ever shown interest in dolls and similar things, so unwrapping it was kind of awkward. **** Also, [[Twilight]] from my mom. I tried reading it just to see what this was about, but I just couldn't survive more than the first 2 chapters, and it's been hidden far away in my bookshelf, behind everything else, safe for human eyes. * Getting a pair of water skis for Christmas. Now, a lot of you might be going "Awesome!", but there are a couple of problems with that. 1) I live in southern New Mexico. 2) I am ''horrendous'' at water skiing ''anyway'' when I do end up getting convinced to try it. * Once for Christmas, we disguised our father's gift (some WIRED magazines, which he likes) in a cereal box. Subverted when he just LOVED the cereal box. * This troper's nana used to buy her horrifying sweaters for Christmas up until I started asking for something else. They were both ugly and

expensive, from the white sweater with an Easter egg popping from its center, to the sweater the color of turds that had a red nosed reindeer adorning the front. And I had to wear them whenever my nana came into town, which practically brought me to the brink of insanity. * I purchased my first car shortly before Christmas one year, and my safety-conscious parents got me all the stock safety stuff for it. As helpful and practical as a can of Fix-a-Flat, a set of jumper cables, and brake pads are, they don't make for an exciting Christmas afternoon. * Once for my birthday, I got Pokemon Diamond, Mario Kart DS... and a package of Chips Ahoy cookies. ** *Squee!* You lucky! I never get sweets, just makeup kits... * [[@/KatanaCat This Troper]]'s relatives, not counting her parents, used to always give her bad gifts. She hates pink, and often got pink teddy bears, pink clothing, and once, a pink fairy-themed jewelry box. She also got [[EpicFail swimsuits]] on one occasion, and lives far away from anywhere she could swim, and [[WhyDidItHaveToBeSnakes refuses to]] [[ItMakesSenseInContext ever go swimming on the VERY rare occasions she goes to the beach]]. One year, though, in addition to the various bad gifts, she got... ''The Joy Of Origami'' (this was a while after she'd gotten into origami). Christmas '09 was [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome the best, though, when she got]] ''[[SonicTheHedgehog Sonic PC Collection]]''. Seems her aunt took that little rant of hers to heart... sadly though, none of the games would run on any of the computers she had at the time - but in February, she got a brand new laptop, and installed every game she could on it immediately, singing all the while. --> [[SonicHeroes ''What goes up must come down, yet my feet don't touch the ground...'']] * I decided to do this to troll my friend. He unwrapped my present and saw an old and beat up box for scrabble: travel edition. He's a nice guy so he was really appreciative even though it sucked. He opened the box and it was empty. I had written in the bottom "Recession hit hard at my house, this box means we're eating Ramen for a week. But taped to the lid of the box, he didn't see until another friend pointed it out, was an new D.S. game. It was hilarious. ---You go right back to MyNewGiftIsLame and write a nice thank you note for that sweater. You'll grow into it, and neon orange and forest green is a very striking color combination. ----

MySensorsIndicateYouWantToTapThat So, my cousin had left me alone in a museum with her adorable, geeky, WorldOfWarcraft- playing boyfriend. [[{{Understatement}} Which she should not have done]].Geeky guy. Geeky girl. Geeky place. ''Not a good idea.'' We had a great time, wandering around, making MontyPython references and discussing why ''[[BiggusDickus Amorphallus titanius]]'' is a hilariously innapropriate name for a plant. But within about half an hour, I was madly crushing on him. I didn't think he noticed, until we

walked past an exhibit involving a thermal imaging screen. Basically, it shows most people's bodies as [[ColourCodedForYourConvenience greenish-yellow outlines with a few red patches in the middle]]. -->'''Me''':Cool! So, what does an extremity look like? He moved his hand in front of the camera. It showed up mostly green with the odd yellow patch. Then I tried it. It was [[RedRightHand BRIGHT RED]]. [[WreathedInFlames WITH FLAMES COMING OUT OF IT.]] ([[UnreliableNarrator Okay, maybe not the]] flames, [[RuleOfFunny but you get the idea]].) -->'''Him''':Wow. [[CaptainObvious You have warm hands.]] -->'''Me''':Uh... yeah... I guess I just have good circulation or something. (''Or maybe my heart's just beating a little faster than usual for some reason...'') *LuminescentBlush* He didn't say anything about it, but I'm sure he could tell by that point. After all, he caught me [[IncrediblyLamePun red handed.]] ** [[CSIMiami YYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhh!]]

MySisterIsOffLimits * I have had to have many Serious Talks with my best friend on why she is not to mack on my brother. Mainly, because he's a colossal shithead and she dates lots of shitheads, and I'm tyring to break her of the habit. Otherwise, I wouldn't mind. * This troper knows someone who has third degree UST with his friend's sister. [[EveryoneCanSeeIt They're pretty much in a relationship by default.]] Partially subverted, because the brother doesn't care, but the guy insists on enforcing the trope anyways and not actually going out with her. [[OrIsIt Except that they're sex friends, for some reason.]] * This troper's father fell in love with his good friend's sister''in-law''. Didn't stop the friend from being extremely pissed when said sister-in-law turned out to return the feelings. [[ItGetsBetter The friend got over it]], and this tropers parents have had a [[HappilyMarried reasonably happy marriage]] currently over 25 years strong. * This troper's older brother once did this in front of his entire baseball team. His exact words? "That's my sister. Don't touch her in any way other than a 2 second hug. I will beat you senseless, even if she makes the first move. Now, who wants hotdogs?" * This troper went to an all boys school where talking about girls can be... colorful to say the least. The one house rule: Talking about sisters were off limits. ** This Troper also goes to an all boys school with just as colorful conversations regarding girls. This is an aversion as talking about sisters may as well be the school's sport. * This troper talks to someone on another message board, who likes to joke that this troper isn't allowed to date his sister. But this troper hasn't met or even seen a picture of the lady in question to decide if he's interested. And he's so insistently brought her up for no reason at all that [[BrotherSisterIncest this troper is starting to

suspect things...]] * In this troper's most recent yearbook, there is a "Siblings Page", on which there is (among other things) a picture of a senior guy and his sophomore sister. He is holding a sign which reads "She Is Not Allowed To Date". [Update: [[TemptingFate Didn't work]].] * This troper won't let you have his sister. You don't want her anyways. ** [[TemptingFate Are you sure we wouldn't?]] * Exception: This troper once had a friend who, while never expressing it out loud, seemed to hint more than once that it would be okay for me to date his sister. Nothing ever happened though, since said friend and sister looked fairly...similar... ** Seth? Is that you? (This troper and his sister did have very similar looks back in grade school, though she was always cuter. There isn't nearly so much similarity anymore, especially since he [[GrowingTheBeard started wearing a beard]].) * Inversion: One friend of [[DarkInsanity13 this troper's]] friends once joked that it would be funny if she (friend) was going out with her (troper's) brother. The immediate answer was "'''NO'''". Mind you, this troper and said friend have a relationship like [[SpongebobSquarepants Spongebob and Squidward]], with friend being Spongebob and troper being Squidward, and this troper would shoot her friend for being annoying, her brother for being stupid enough to date her, and then herself for the torture that could have happened. * This troper knows a very obnoxious {{Jerkass}} with a very hot older sister. He is extremely protective of her, to the point that troper suspected BrotherSisterIncest until the subject came up through other means and she flatly denied it with a very, very, very {{Squick}}ed look on her face. The fact that {{Jerkass}} looks to be [[{{Shotacon}} roughly eight]] and the older sister is, er, to put it simply [[{{Lolicon}} a gigantic walking piece of pedo-bait]] (she's 18, but looks a little over half that) may not have helped. * This troper had this speech off a friend - and promptly ignored him and attempted to get his sister into bed. As we were both consenting adults I saw no reason why he had any justification for trying to control who I (or her) slept with. * This troper once got a strong talking to from a friend for not noticing his sister who, obviously to everyone but me, was clearly very much attracted to me... * Inverted by [[{{Chzo}} This Troper]]'s best friend, who said he'd be stoked if he (troper) married his (friend) twin sister. Alas, it is not to be. * This troper's brother just got married. To a woman who nearly got him arrested and seems to be out for his money. This troper got overprotective. Her brother is ten years older than her and they haven't seen one another in a little over 8 years. * I reverse this. I have told my friend's sister many times that ''I'' am off-limits. [[StalkerWithACrush She doesn't seem to be deterred by this, unfortunately.]] * I've had inversions of this. In high school, I was the guy who was too nice for his own good. People regularly tried to match me up with their sisters.

* [[AcrossTheStars This troper]] will claw out the eyes of [[DistaffCounterPart any girl who hurts her baby brother]]. * This troper is the sister of this trope. Both her brother and her father has smilingly said that they'll kill anyone who tries to lay his hands on her before she's thirty. Bummer. * Interestingly, this troper gives the smiley "Boy, I'd sure hate it if something had to happen to you..." version to her sister's boyfriends, and said sister gives the straightforward "I will KILL YOU if you do something stupid" to my potential interests. * Some sort of crazy inversion happened when this lesbian troper came out to her best friend's little sister. The response was, "You'd better not start dating (best friend's name)". * This troper has had a crush on his friend's sister that meshes with this trope and [[UnluckyChildhoodFriend the fact that he has grown up]] [[LikeBrotherAndSister alongside the two]]. This troper has never acted on it, seeing as she's slightly underage, but the brother doesn't openly invoke this trope. [[HilarityEnsues Hilarity ensues]] at times when this troper creates [[{{Squick}} squicky]] hypothetical remarks in front of him, though. * Subverted, in my case because one of my friends asked me who I liked then I responded with "your sister". From that day he kept on pushing me and made me ask his sister out and when I was rejected he now tries to "improve" me and make me practice to ask her out again. I was only joking around though * In high school this troper inverted this trope. A friend came up nervously and asked if he could date my sister. I said I didn't care as she can make up her own mind. I was secretly smiling to myself because I knew he wasn't going to get laid. Later, same friend came up to me nervously about 3 months later and said he wanted to break up with her. I laughed and said "Didn't get laid, hunh?" which is reluctantly admitted. * [[AdamS This troper's]] younger sister has recently started recieving friend requests from guys she doesn't know. I have recently started sending messages to them. * This Troper's [[KnightTemplarBigBrother little brother]] found a condom in my cousin's room which was for our older step-brother. I couldn't believe what it [[NoHoldsBarredBeatdown led to]] * This Troper's sister is currently married to a guy that he was friends with in high school. [[AvertedTrope Aside from one joke wherein This Troper played the stereotypical "mean older brother" for a laugh, the day before their wedding and several years after the two started dating, never once did he question or discourage this relationship.]] Take that, tired cliche! * Averted oh-so-hard by one of this troper's friends and another friends' little sister. They have been dating for well over two years and are currently living together. * Both explicitly and implicitly stated to be the case with two of [[{{Be}} this troper's]] good friends. In the former case, it's not such a problem because I have known the sister since she was eleven and there's less temptation there. In the latter...not so much. ** Update: Ahahaha I can't believe I ever thought that. It's increased from two to three, the trope has been made explicit in two cases and

in the third, another friend has already been there, done that and is hiding the fact at all costs. * This troper's [[PlatonicLifePartners best guy friend]] feels this way about me. Sometimes it's endearing, but most of the time it's damn annoying. XD * This troper's brother told his best friend to stop making puppy dog eyes at me during his Bar Mitzvah. It didn't work, it's been three years and it's starting to creep me out a little. * This Troper... oh dear.... --> ThisTroper: "Damn that ho's fine." --> Friend (Not for much longer): "That's my sister." --> ThisTroper: "Damn your sister's fine." ** Well.... if you are going to stick your foot in your mouth, you may as well stick it in all the way. *** [[strike:That's what she said!]] *** The above troper has been shot. ''That'' is what she said. * This troper has a friend who was a complete aversion of this trope. He couldn't have cared less who dated his sister. He was a bit apathetic that way. * This troper experienced a highly weird version of this trope: she's a bisexual woman, who met a guy and his younger sister and happened to get along quite well with both of them. The brother seemed to find himself stuck somewhere between "if you touch her I will hurt you" and "would you like to go out with me sometime". (Nothing ever came of it since the troper moved to a new city before it reached any kind of crisis point, but for what it's worth she preferred the brother as she felt the sister would have been too young for her.) * [[@/{{MiraShio}} This troper]] is often asked by her classmates if she has any older siblings (which I indeed have; one brother and one sister). Her response? "I do, and he/she is way too old for you." * Both straight and averted by [[TheTallOne my]] brothers. They have made it quite clear that the average human male is nowhere near good enough for me, but helpfully provided a list of people I am allowed to date. While the majority of the list were things like "Jesus" and "Atticus Finch," the last name on the list was the sibling of my brother's best friend, and it was circled and underlined several times. [[UnderStatement Subtlety is not a word that can be used to describe my family.]] * This troper's younger brother has recently shown that he will harm anyone she ties and bring home when she goes to college next year. It's gotten to the point that this fact ranks highest on the list of reasons not to tell her family about her boyfriend- above "I live in Texas, he lives in New Zealand." * This troper younger sister had told her friend who had a crush on me that I'm in college, I won't date a tween and she shouldn't keep hope so apparently I'm out off limits. She also is for my friends. I'm six years her senior and no one can mention she being beautiful even that gay friend I know since we're five. * I have never understood this. If I had a sister (it could maybe happen with one of my female friends, but they can take care of themselves) I wouldn't mind if she dated my friends for two reasons. One: I know them; they wouldn't hurt her. Two: It's not my decision;

it's hers. * Slight subversion: [[Tropers/DrMcP this troper]]'s [[ShipperOnDeck best]] [[OrIsIt friend]] recently informed her that this troper is exactly her brother's type. * Inverted by this troper's friend - after learning that I'd had a crush on her older brother for the past year, she immediately commented that I was really similar in personality to both him and his ex-girlfriend. She's now in the process of trying to convince me that I should try to get closer to him, [[ShipperOnDeck as she thinks we would go together well.]] * This Troper didn't even know that he was guilty of this until he and his brother were hanging out with a mutual friend at our place, and the friend found some photos of our sister, commenting on her hotness. He later revealed that he almost shat himself when we turned, in unconscious unison, and did our best to glare a hole through his skull. Now, this guy is a nice guy and all, but not the kind of guy anyone would want dating his sister. Ever... * This troper is especially guilty of this, seeing it fit to chase the throngs of horny teenaged boys and delinquent friends away from her dearest sister (who is five years her junior) by embarrassing them away. One day my sister brings this troper some of her school. "Who are you?" I say to one of them. "And why are you wearing your school socks like that? Are you some kind of gang member? Are you flashing your gang colours at me? I don't let my sister talk to gangsters and you'd better fix your bloody socks before I fix 'em for you." ** One day this troper sees my sister talking to a strange boy. I see her point at me and motion me over so I come and she introduces me. I greet him. "Hello there. You're a handsome young man." I say. "Quite young too. I know how you young men can be, all eager to play the field and have a bit of fun. It's all well and good until someone's got a bun in the oven. So let me tell you something, if I have a niece before my sister is thirty I'm coming for you and it's such a shame for nice, handsome young men to end up in the river. OK ta-ta. I'm watching you two," I look at my sister. "And I better not see any making out over here." * This troper's drama class has been doing improv together for a year and a half now, and they have developed a ridiculous litany of recurring jokes, including that the nicest guy in class will punch you out for even looking at his hot sister. (He's an only child in real life.) * Complete aversion: When This Troper started crushing on his friend's sister, the friend in question said, and I quote, "I don't care". This Troper and the friend's sister dated for a good eight months and broke up on happy terms, even. But, played straight in that This Troper hasn't been as close with the friend since. * This troper has been confronted with this and just wants to know why it's okay for the sister to date random guys that the other sibling doesn't know, but people said sibling does know, and would be easier to control through the friendship with them, are not allowed to date them. A case of "I'll be good to your sister, even if only because she's ''your'' sister." * This Troper's sister starts high school next year... I think that

explains it... * This Troper's older sister is an aversion. Nearly every conversation we have ends with her asking if this Troper has a boyfriend, and if not, she apparently has many friends she can set me up with. Joking or not, it's pretty creepy considering she's 7 years older and graduated college already, and this Troper is still in [[JailBait highschool.]] * I was at a party in a friend's basement when his sister came downstairs with some of her friends and started talking with the friend. I was standing nearby and asked who he had been talking to. He mentioned that she was his sister and was about 15 (We were 17-18.) He then said not to get any ideas about her. I was drunk and jokingly said "I can't promise anything." He gave me the evil eye and I backpedalled really quickly. * This troper has a funny situation. See, she would love for one of her friends to date her little sister, and the guys has shown interest... but the little sister is a lesbian. She really is off limits. ---* "My name she go?" * "My name spaghetti. * "My name is Joe, and I'd like to take your sister Flo to a show. Can is Eddie, and I'd like to take your sister Betty for Is she ready?" is Chuck and-[[MySisterIsOffLimits *BLAM BLAM BLAM* ]]

---<<|TroperTales|>>

Myst Myst generates an unusual relationship with its players by its very nature. Since the protagonist is an ____, many players put themselves in the situation. Please put stuff about your experiences with the game here rather than on the main page.

!!Myst Troper Tales: NightmareFuel * At age four, NOTHING gave [[{{Ronnie}} this troper]] more nightmares than the opening of Myst. ** You too, huh? Me, it was the sheer emptiness of the island. ** Seconded, although I didn't get nightmares. One of my chief memories of my childhood is playing Myst and being terrified by it. ** YMMV. This troper watched his father play the game when he was around 6 or so and thought the vast emptiness of the island was the coolest things ever. Lots to explore. * At three or four, the only age I knew how to reach was the Mechanical Age... And I knew how to reach Achenar's room... It's still

mainly the sounds and the music that haunt me. * For this troper, the NightmareFuel moment (which doubles as a {{Crowning Moment of Awesome}}) is when he manages to get past the conical cage thing in ''Riven'', and simultaneously realizes its intended purpose. This one is easy to miss, since you can get past the puzzle simply by pulling the right lever without understanding the mechanism's purpose. Understanding its purpose requires you to put several pieces together in your mind: the cage, the chair with levers that allows you to progress past the cage, and the apparentlyunrelated game, in a ''children's classroom'' of all places, that teaches you Riven's numbering system. Putting these things together, and realizing who would be sitting in that chair and under what circumstances, made this troper exclaim, "[[spoiler:Gehn]] is ''EVIL''!". ** Hints for this purpose can also be found in one of [[spoiler:Gehn]]'s journals. ** There is also a very hard to spot (because it's blue-on-blue) drawing in a cave showing [[spoiler:Gehn holding two villagers over two hungry Wharks]]. ** In ''The Book of Atrus'' Catherine explains that this happened to one of her friends. * On the Jungle Island in Riven, there are these bizarre-looking guard towers that can be very hard to spot. When you enter a scene that reveals one of the towers, it will suddenly go into a video clip of the guard operator turning a crank, causing some strange-looking doohickeys on the top of it to spin and product an ear-vibrating, ghostly droning sound. There are 2 towers total, and at least three different ways to approach either of them, which are often accidental and leave you going "wait why aren't I moving forwar...oh crap it's that damn guard tower!" ** Doesn't help that the windows at the top look like eyes. * For this anonymous troper, it was half of ''Exile'', almost all of ''Riven'', and a few very shudder-worthy points in ''Myst'' and ''Revelation''. * At a tender age I had to sleep with the light on because of Achenar's rooms - especially in the Mechanical Age! Brrr... * This troper [[spoiler:failed the ending of Myst IV Revelation]] because of Achenar's rooms in the various Ages of the first game. She understood something fishy was going on, but she stubbornly refused [[spoiler:to trust him and think that Yeesha was lying]] because she remembered vividly THAT cage and THAT rose, and also because she liked very much [[spoiler:Yeesha]]. Complete horror ensued when she saw the bad ending... * For this troper it's the Memory Chamber flashback on Serenia which shows [[spoiler: Yeesha]] strapped to a chair and screaming. * As a kid, the theme music for the Stoneship age creeped me out. When I rediscovered the games and bought the soundtrack, I popped it in at night to sleep too, and once the Stoneship music came up, I couldn't sleep the rest of the night. * The temple in the Channelwood age, which actually serves no purpose in gameplay. Creepy music, a ghostly hologram of Achenar, creepy masks, and an altar that "eats" sacrifices.

** At first it sounded like he was saying "Bow to die! To ''die...''," which actually makes sense given that there's a deadly contraption in front of you, so if you bent over ... * The electric cage in Achenar's room in Mechanical Age. And the ribcage lamp in Achenar's room in Stoneship. * For this troper, the most terrifying moment in game actually came from a bug, rather than something intended to be there. In the slave chambers of Teledahn, there are bones. It is possible to kick the skull so that it doesn't stop rattling(likely a physics collision). Rekicking the skull will do nothing to stop it. The rattling can be heard throughout all of Teledahn, and ''is still there if you link away and come back'' This event prompted a long in-game journal entry, which was subsequently deleted because it was more vivid than the actual memory. * shudders* * Did no one else discover the chest with the [[spoiler: ''decaying corpse'' ]] in it in the Mechanical Age? ** Most of us spent months in therapy specifically trying to FORGET that... * Gawd, going back to see this [[spoiler:corpse]] people are talking about I remembered the true source of my fear of Myst: the sound of linking. that and the incredibly loud, claustrophibic, ''pitch dark'' elevator up to the tower. But really, the sound of linking has haunted me since first playing Myst. I read a fan fiction or two where it talked about 'the familiar sound of linking' when a character linked and it hit me how utterly terrified I'd be if I ever heard that noise for real, especially after touching a book. * Really? I think that sound is hilarious. It sounds like a voice saying "Oooooooh... dicks dicks dicks dicks dicks..." * The death of Willow 'Wheely' Engberg in URU Live. She crawls into a hole which was unveiled by an earthquake with her best friend, gets trapped there, spends several days without her Relto to escape to, and eventually gets murdered by a Bahro screaming "Noloben"...while her father listens and pleads. ** Exactly what happened to Wheely was never publicized. All that's known is that the first Restoration Engineer lowered into the cavern where she'd been trapped started screaming to be pulled out. All he'd ever say was that "you don't want to see it." * On the jungle island in Riven, there was a Whark statue, which had a mouth that could be opened from both sides and walked through. After walking through from behind it the first time, there is a child sitting on the path, staring at you for a second, then running away. For some reason, this troper jumped out of his seat the first time this happened. Just shows how great the atmosphere is. * This troper wasn't all that creeped out by Achenar's room in the Mechanical Age, except for his trophy ape-head. Oh, and if you look through Sirius' telescope while the tower is rotated to the north you'll see [[spoiler: a skeleton hanging by its neck]]. Oh god...

MysteriousMiddleInitial * [[{{lkmjr}} This troper's]] middle name is Kay. It makes the question "What is your middle name?" a little complicated to answer.

** This troper's little sister has the same problem. * This troper's grandfather had neither a middle name _nor a first name_, just initials for both. This greatly confused the draft board in the Korean War: they had provision for a solider with no middle name, but had trouble listing somebody's first name as simply 'D'. * I used to purposely never tell people my middle name purely because I didn't like it. Then I realised it was Captain Kirk's first name, so now I'm cool with it, although I still only write (First Name) J. (Second Name) out of habit. ** Have I edited this page already and forgotten it? It's also [[JamesBond 007]]'s first name, but that never resonated as well as Kirk for me. * I know someone who doesn't even ''have'' a middle name. He's named after his father, just without his middle name. * My Father is named Jack E, and my Uncle was named Steve N. Just E and N. Also, their last name begins with an M, so the joke is extended even further to their initials: JEM and SNM. Yes, S&M. Worse yet, as a child, I knew that the initials joke must have extended to my Uncle's name, but could not determine what it meant. * [[Tropers/KatanaCat I]] have a middle name, but few know what it is, or even what my middle initial is. I'm Katie N. [last name]. Bet you can't guess what the N. stands for! * I have two middle names, which I usually don't tell people, since they make up my required secondary internet identity. * This troper's initials were JLS way before the band existed. He usually doesn't include his middle name in documents, but when he does, he just uses L., because it makes him look more important than he actually is. * On school rosters, this troppette's name shows up as (last name comma)(first name) D. People ask me what the D means and I tell them to guess. They've guessed Diane, Diana, Danielle, Dani, and Donna. My middle name is Danae. * This troper's dad's middle name is Q. Not initial, ''name''. It doesn't stand for anything. He just started using it during high school because it sounded cool. * This Troper's initial for her middle name is S, and she always write her name as Mnica S. (last name). The times she's been asked about it, she tells them; but they always forgot it or have miswritten it. And I bet you will never guess what it means... * This troper's case is a little weird. Everyone knows my dad's middle name, but next to noone knows what his ''first'' initial (E) stands for. By extension, noone knows what ''my'' middle initial (C) means. My dad's first name is acually Edmund, after my grandfather, while he usually goes by Chris, both his and my middle name. Noone ever assumes that our middle name is what my dad goes by, but I don't. * This troper's friends have been taking bets on what their teacher's mysterious middle N stands for. ---If you want to know what the Q. in my name stands for head back to MysteriousMiddleInitial.

MysteryMeat * When this troper was living with her sister and husband earlier this year, she was basically served a bowl of what looked like dog food on rice for dinner one night. After reluctantly taking a bite, [[ImpossiblyDeliciousFood it felt like my tongue had died and gone to heaven]]. I never did find out what that meat was, though. * This editor's friend has told him how his roommate once did a school-newspaper "expose" of what was in the Mystery Meat ([[spoiler:horse rectums]]). This editor's first response was "Wait, they seriously called it Mystery Meat?" * Comparatively low-cost and commercially-manufactured meat pies here in Australia tend to have the floor-sweepings of an abattoir (fancy word for a slaughterhouse) ground up into mince and put in them usually textured vegetable protein is added to the mix for filler in these pies, sometimes thus that they only have enough meat content in them to stop them having to be labelled vegetarian and to dodge falseadvertising laws ([[{{PunnyName}} Four 'n' Twenty]] is said to be a particular offender - notably the name of the brand comes from an old nursery rhyme). Doesn't stop most of us from eating them though, [[{{Tropers/Crion87}} this troper]] [[{{NotSoAboveItAll}} shamefully included on occasion]]. The good news though is one can buy betterquality meat pies from any reputable Australian baker where they bake their own pies (i.e. you have some idea that it's the musculature and not the...{{ahem}}...[[{{IfYouKnowWhatIMean}} soft bits]]). * This Troper's dad swears to god that his high school had 1,000 students and ''none of them'' ever ate the lunches they were that bad. * This Troper's school serves these strange cheeseburgers every day in the cafeteria. Problem is, nobody (including this Troper) can figure out what kind of meat (if it is meat) it is made of. Only thing he knows is that they taste like bread dough, and the most popular suggestion is squirrel. * [[@/{{endlessness}} This Brazilian troper]] can attest that most of the meat on the cafeterias of public universities IS this trope. Sometimes, the meat has large-ish amounts of fat, to the point of being as unhealthy as most junk food. Sometimes, it is too tough or too chewy, or has a disgusting taste. ** In a similar note, the cafeteria of the university he goes to has some food-related urban legends which are HighOctaneNightmareFuel by themselves. * For a far more healthy version, veterinarians have a special food called A/D. It's supposed to be made of pre-digested protien compounds, for ease of digestion. No one at the clinic, however, knows quite what meat it's actually made from. Almost any omnivorous/carnivorous animal can eat it, and it has a bit of a fishy smell, but no one knows for certain. * This troper was once forced to eat a vegitarian burger- a microwaved vegitarian burger. It has little bits of red, yellow, and green, as well as the occasional gristle. I told my mother that it looked disgusting and I wouldn't - under any circumstances- eat it. And I ended up trying a few bites of it anyway. Warning to the Wise- Always keep water handy after eating something like this- it's a more efficiant way to get rid of the taste. :P

* Any new "lunch special" which isn't part of the normal menu falls into the mystery meat range. Ranging from tough to swallow to causing stomachaches after a day.

MysteryScienceTheater3000 ->''In the not too distant future,'' ->''[[NextSundayAD Next Sunday A.D.]],'' ->''There lived a bunch of tropers,'' ->''Not different from [[YouSuck you]] or [[ThisTroper me]]...'' * This troper saw two guys doing this at his local theater. They weren't funny at all, and the movie (''TheHangover 2'') was good enough that no snarkery was needed. At about the 1:10 mark some bald guy leaned into one of the dudes' ears and yelled at him to shut the fuck up. Thanks, bald guy! * Yesterday I was watching a popular episode on YouTube. My threeyear-old brother was sitting with me. [[HilarityEnsues Lulz]] were had just a few hours ago when, without provocation or proper context, he shrieked, "[[MemeticMutation Watch out for snakes! Aaah!]]" * [[http://community.livejournal.com/badfic_quotes/ This community]] on LiveJournal is entirely devoted to MSTing bad FanFic. * [[Tropers/TromboneChild This troper]] and her family quote MST3K and RiffTrax quite often and will rewatch our MST3K shorts over and over again, laughing harder each time. My siblings and I also attempt to MST movies like ''HighSchoolMusical'' when we watch them. * This troper and his best friend sometimes watch what we have been told is crap just to absolutely laugh at each other's joke on it, most of the time it comes down to us creating an entirely new plot, or just discussing how Mike Tyson would solve the film's problems much quicker and easier. Me and another friend do this with history books with picture reference, don't read the plot, create your own story using pictures alone. * This troper and her family dissolved into MST while watching the original ''FlashGordon'' movie, making fun of the cheesy special effects, strange plot twists, quoting various lines and singing the Queen theme song, and, of course, doing our best '''{{BRIANBLESSED}}!''' impressions. Of course, we had more fun watching it than we have anything in ages. * My brother and I have been doing this since we were 8 and 5 respectively. Our local movie theater HATES us because we're unable to shut up. ** Yet, you continue the behavior fully aware of the fact that you are ruining your fellow moviegoers' experience that they paid for. This Troper thinks some people might consider you assholes for doing so. * This troper does this a lot. My dad's girlfriend hates it when I do it, since it detracts from the time she gets to ask for us to explain painfully obvious plot points to her. * {{Griffin}} and her little sis once MST'd Barbie and the Magic of Pegasus. They were really, really bored and wanted to do something other than just watch. Now they're planning which Barbie movie to MST next.

* [[Tropers/SapphireFlame This Troper's]] father bought a boxed set of science fiction B-movies on DVD. My brother and I had recently discovered MST3K through the wonders of Youtube. Fun times are had by all. * This [[Tropers/TheTallOne Tropette]] came from an MST3K family, and probably watched more MST3K than I did Disney movies. I assumed everyone makes snarky comments about whatever it is they're watching, and often have a hard time refraining from snarking movies up, much to the annoyance of my friends. * [[{{Dr4}} I]] can't watch ANYTHING without unloading round after round of snarky commentary in the process. My favorite target is school plays, which are all excellent SnarkBait for many. * As a result of one too many screenings of ''Soultaker'' and ''Laserblast'', [[Tropers/AndyWaltfeld This Troper]] now drinks the [[SophisticatedAsHell HELL]] out of his Cokes. * This troper and a friend MST3Ked all of ''GundamWing''. She has it archived for lulz. * Since everyone in my family hates the mass-produced christmas specials they show, we celebrate every christmas eve by going into the basement, turning on the TV, popping in the ancestral christmas specials tape, and TALK through the entire thing! * This Troper is sad to say he paid full price to see the Bruce Willis opus "Armageddon" in 1998. By twenty minutes into the movie he was MSTing it to himself. * This troper instinctively does this to ''everything''. For example, there's an advertising ad which uses the phrase "grow your business"; he generally doesn't bother restraining the phrase "So [PRODUCT NAME HERE] is like pouring shit on your business?" He also periodically whips up [[AttentionDeficitCreatorDisorder never-to-be-completed]] {{MSTing}}s of things he gets off the Internet (and, in a TakeThat to his English Extension class, the first two chapters of ''Possession''). ** His favourite moment of this, however, was when other people in his lodgings were apparently watching ''Tyra'' because they couldn't be arsed to change the channel. Tyra Banks was quizzing a 53-year-old man (with a 34-year-old wife) on what assorted Internet abbreviations meant by holding them up on cards. This troper immediately grabbed a piece of paper and scrawled "STFU + GTFO" on it, saying something along the lines of "I've got another one for him." * This happened during a Classical Civilisation class at this lurker's school. We were watching some really old documentary with a [[{{SpecialEffectsFailure}} terrible]] shot of fighting soldiers superimposed over fire that lead to this lurker uttering, "Mycenae had yet to understand the concept that fire wasn't alive" in the exact some tone as the narrator of the video, and the class descended into chaos from there. ** Also occurred during a powerpoint presentation that cost the department about 200. It had so many glaring errors that it got given a [[{{DrinkingGame}} point system]], and the name [[{{MemeticMutation}} Super Expensive Presentation]] from the teachers and students alike. * This troper has extreme difficulty ''not'' doing this during films.

During my first viewing of Rocky Horror, about halfway through the group of friends I'd come with (it was at someone's home, and not in a theatre) forgot their pre-arranged shout-outs -- and to fill the awkward silence, apparently my snarking sufficed. Fun times. * This Troper (KKDW) also has a habit of MSTing movies and TV shows, a recent one came during an episode of ''Time Team'' about Stone Henge... -->Voice Over(paraprased): For six years this team set out to uncover the secrets of Stone Henge... -->Me: Two months later the footage was found. ** I've also recorded a full commentary (with my brother) for ''[[Main/RevolutionaryGirlUtena Adolescence of Utena]]'' which I had up on YouTube until my account got suspended (but I plan re-upload it on my new account). * I've been lucky enough to find a club of like-minded geeks at my college who gather weekly to MST whichever movie we vote on at the previous meeting, from bad films like ''Night of the Lepus'' to good films like ''Dark City''. ("That's what you get for bringing a knife to a mind fight!") Skiffy, I salute you! * This troper was acting in a play where an audience member was doing this very audibly. He was too impressed to be annoyed and decided to [[LargeHam emote harder]] to encourage her. * This troper was watching a car commercial some years ago, not long after getting into MST3K (it was in reruns on the Sci-Fi Channel by then). As soon as the commercial got to the line "No money down! Zeropercent interest!", my mouth opened on reflex: "Well, he's right about one thing; I have zero-percent interest." * This troper does it almost instinctively with anything he watches. There were a few instances in 8th grade US History. During a documentary about historic something-or-otherburg, there was a shot of a windmill: -->Voice Over(paraprased): Today, (town name) has been restored to resemble itself as it was three hundred years ago. -->Me: Including its lucrative miniature golf business. ** Made more hilarious by the teacher shushing me, then cracking up seconds later when she realized what I'd said. * I do this impulsively, especially when watching educational films at school. One of my favorite examples was from a documentary about the excretory system in Biology class. It was talking about a test of people drinking water and exercising, then urinating in a cup and running tests to see the amount of water in the urine. After explaining this, it then showed a clip of some of the participants drinking water from a glass, and, without skipping a beat, I exclaimed "NO WAIT THAT'S THE WRONG GLASS AHHH", and then the class broke out in laughter. * This troper once briefly played Mike and the robots on a MassiveMultiplayerCrossover online RPG. Their CrowningMomentOfFunny (at least in his opinion) was the [[http://community.livejournal.com/sages_of_chaos/340559.html?page=2#t 24975183 merciless MSTing]] of a ParodySue's post. * Once, while watching a "horror" movie at a friend's house, we got so bored we started doing this, the best line being, on seeing a

possessed old man crawl up some stairs, "Mr Jenkins is sleepwalking again..." * [[{{Pita}} Me]] and a good friend MST everything we see. We saw Batman & Robin, and MST'd it to the point where, to this day, whenever someone makes a joke (not even a pun) "HE MADE A PUN! THAT WAS PUNNY! LOOK AT THE PUN!". We've also MST'd Dollhouse while we were watching it, with my favorite MST line to date. "I believe he is being dramatic. His face appears dramatic. Indeed he has a dramatic face. Notice the drama in this scene. It is quite dramatic. Dramatic things are happening. This, my friend, is drama." * This troper frequents a site where, when bored in the chat room, we decide to MST3K movies on youtube. It's quite fun, and makes for a great article in the site's wiki. sydlexia.com, for anyone who cares to visit. * This trooper does it from time to time when she goes to theaters. Films like CloudyWithAChanceOfMeatballs and ToyStory double feature. (ex: *When Bullseye loses his saddle* He's naked!! :D) * Have you ever gone to the HP6 midnight premiere? With your friends? One of whom decided to scream "SNAPE KILLS DUMBLEDORE!" before the film started for the lulz? Well, when said event occurred, after Dumbles fell, the theatre was silent. My friend leans over and chimes, "Mmm, whatcha saaay~" from Hide And Seek... I ended up laughing right after Dumbledore died. Am I going to hell? No... I've watched the movie of "Beowulf" and whenever something physical happened, I hit the Up button on the DVD remote, strangely making a thumping noise. Even the key line. "[[ThisIsSPARTA I! AM! -thump-!"]] * This troper once started to do an MST of an infamously bad fic (basically the fandom's own lesser ''MyImmortal''). He got through the prologue before the fic became [[SoBadItsHorrible unreadable]]. ** This same troper loves to do this with advertisements as well. --> '''[=Cash4gold=] ad:''' We've increased our cash payouts 20%! --> '''This troper:''' Yes, that's right! We'll pay you 2/5ths of what your gold is worth instead of 1/3rd! --> '''AOL ad:''' Want a better Internet? --> '''This troper:''' You're probably on AOL. * 0dd1: Just like at least one example I've read here, I've taken to doing this on videos shown in school. Notable examples include: ** Watching an animated [[AdaptationDecay adaptation]] of ''[[KingArthur SirGawainAndTheGreenKnight]]'', I was merciless with my riffing and got a couple chuckles out of a few people and (nearly) a detention. ** Health class (DRUG EDUCATION!!!...echoo...), in which everyone in class mocks every video, though not quite so intellectually. One instance that wasn't so bad was one video we saw (I believe it was about marijuana, but whatever it was, its moral was DrugsAreBad) that every two seconds had a lady's voice flatly saying "FACT" with a [[ScareChord distorted bass note]] playing in the background. MemeticMutation [[HilarityEnsues ensued]], as every time it came up, my friend shouted "FACT!" while I did the bass note... until one killjoy told us to shut up. ** Actually, I pretty much do this with every single movie I see now, and even TV shows (much to the annoyance of my mom when she's watching

''DaysOfOurLives''). My favorite that I've riffed on, however, is ''TheIncredibles'' -- great movie, but great opportunities in it to make jokes. Related: I once had a conversation with someone on YouTube (it was in the comments of a video that mixed scenes from ''WallE'' with Crow's "Creepy Girl" song) in which we reached the conclusion that ''WallE" would also be a good film to riff on. * Me and my friend got together and MSTed TheCatReturns and RockADoodle. ** And later I mocked the 1970's version of Macbeth in English class, getting a few laughs out of the crowd and a very pissed off supply teacher. -->"Looks like the Elderly Nudist's convention is back in town!" -->"Head Off! Apply directly to neck!" *** Same here, though I did it [[RefugeInAudacity while reading the play aloud]]. One part included a joke on one person in the class's mispronunciation of Fleance's name: ---> ''(snark in italics)'' '''MACBETH''' Thanks for that. ''And tell Florence "Hello" for me.'' * My science teacher likes to show us YouTube videos at the end of class about whatever we were just taught. One day we were watching something about Red tide. You can watch it [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0LdLWPwdwVs here]]. At the very end when the screen turned red, this troper shouted "THEY KILLED THE LABORATORY OH NOOOOOOOOO" * This troper and his friend often perform this to shows and movies were watching. I even do it when he makes me read his comics and such. I have even made my friends like going to school assemblies because of the fact I MST3K them, and it's hilarious, or it was but unfortunately I've graduated from high school. * This troper has done this for almost every movie he's ever watched, before learning of MST3K last year. Today, we MSTed ''TheWizardOfOz'' and I seemed to be the only one purposely funny. My favourite bit was when the Witch and her monkey are looking into the Crystal Ball. -->Me: I just LOVE my new lipstick. It's SOO my shade. * This troper and a friend love to trade MST3K barbs for [[Series/DoctorWho Doctor Who]]. In fact, she thinks that Doctor Who is perfect for Rifftrax! It's got the cheap special effects, its own clichs, and great pauses for funny comments. * Last weekend, this troper got herself KICKED OUT of a theater for doing this too loudly to New Moon. She wasn't disappointed. That was what she went for. ** [[{{0dd1}} I]] went to New Moon for that reason, too. I did it loudly as well and I actually somehow got a few laughs out of some Twihards as well! Of course, by the end of the film, everyone in the theater had moved to the opposite end of the theater. Can't imagine why. * [[PentiumMMX2 This troper]] and his sister did this when watching [[Film/StarTrek the 11th Star Trek movie]]. While fun, it was generally harder to do when when we did some classic Series/DoctorWho a few months prior. * [[{{Crowbar}} This troper]] and a friend of his recently tried MSTing a music video. You can see the results

[[http://exhaustedlamp.blogspot.com/2010/01/something-about-badromance.html here]]. Tell us we're funny! * [[ABadDriver This troper]] Does this repeatedly. ** *Watching Ninja Assassin's opening scene when the gangsters are shooting everywhere* "Yes. [[ATeamFiring Waste your ammo while trying to shoot a nigh invisible]] being that can [[MadeOfPlasticine turn you into]] [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel a sushi bar.]] [[SarcasmMode That'll work]]" * This Troper, his cousin and our friend tend to do this a lo... all the time to be honest. Any film we go and see together we usually have at least 5 or 6 comments each to make in the film and I swear I've occasionally heard other people laugh. This troper will actually admit he now [=MSTs=] his classes and just about everything he watches ** Some of the troper's favourites of his own: ---> Opening scene to the strangers: "Huh... This how they found Kurt Cobain's house" Everyone *Ohhh haha" Me "What? Too soon?" ---> Later on during the strangers after the brother is shot. Scarecrow mask killer appears. Friend: "Hi, I'm Barry Scott and I want to show you new Cillit Bang Ultra, Bang-" Me: (Interrupting) "And your brother's gone." * Recently, this troper attended a friend's party, in which we ended up watching the wonder that is StarshipTroopers through Netflix streaming. As we'd all seen the movie before, this is pretty much what happened during the whole movie. Highlights include referring to the lead woman as [[MostCommonSuperpower "Big Boobs"]], discussing the idiocy of having Co-Ed showers in the military, and renaming the [[ZergRush Battle of Klendathu]] to [[SouthPark "Operation: Human Shield."]] --> '''This Troper:''' (After the discovery of the Brain Bug's first victim) Looks like he got skullfucked. --> '''This Troper's Friend:''' [[IncrediblyLamePun "Brings a whole new meaning to the phrase, 'fucked his brains out.'"]] * This troper does this all the time, with anything, his most recent being while watching FMA Brotherhood on Adult Swim. --> '''Truth:''' (to Ed) You could say I'm all, one, everything...and you. --> '''This Troper:''' That's right, '''I''' am the Walrus. and, in relation --> '''Truth:''' (as Ed's being dragged into the doors) Isn't this what you wanted? --> '''This Troper:''' Goo goo g'joob, motherf*cker. * This troper has a few. ** Fantastic four movie: -->Ben (After Johnny flies off the boat at the end): Show off. -->Me: All I can do is sink to the bottom of a pool. ** While watching the IronMan 2 trailer: -->Me: Looks like the film crew for the IronMan movies cast SummonBiggerFish for this one. * This troper recently got a hold of a free copy of Avatar. He has chosen to use his powers for good - namely, to get his friend and riff the hell out of it. Details [[http://paladin12345678.deviantart.com/journal/30474796/ here]].

* My mom and I went to see [[StarWars Episode Three]] a few weeks after its release. My mom and I were kind of MSTing it the whole time (choice line: "How do you KNOW R2D2 lives?!") But when Anakin climbs up out of the lava with ONE ARM, she turns to me and says, [[MontyPythonandtheHolyGrail "it's only a flesh wound!"]] I seriously died. * This troper was watching a recording of Ian McKellen in Macbeth. In this film he has ridiculously gelled back hair. At the scene where he says "...doth unfix my hair..." I quipped "Not much that could do that." Also, when he says "Fetch me nothing but males!" I quipped "Isn't that ironic...", referencing his now-open homosexuality. * Probably this troper's favorite pastime. She has a regular riffing group and all, but enjoys herself most when it's an off-the-cuff affair. * [[{{@/ptitlezk4u0rtn}} This troper]] ''loves'' to {{MST}} practically everything he watches on television. Unfortunately, [[TakeThatMe he really sucks at it]]. ** He's now had a lot of practice, thanks to ''TheWayOfTheMetagamer'', and can occasionally MST such that others are amused. He has received several angry glares for doing so at live theatrical performances. * I did it with the English dub of ''OutlawStar''. I know it's loved, but every time Jim Hawking opened his mouth I wanted to hurt something, so I attacked ''it''. * This Troper's brother was at a comic convention, and went in to a screening of some Green Lantern thing. Right there, in the front row, were people dressed in (surprisingly good) Joel, Crow, and Tom Servo costumes. As well, This Troper's anime club works like this. * This Troper tends to do this whenever she sees a movie with her best friend(s). During Lord of the Rings, as the Gandalf is leading the Fellowship, our DM whispered, scandalized 'You NEVER put your wizard in front!'. More recently, while watching Iron Man 2, as Hammer is being led away by the cops, I turned to my friend and said 'You can't do this! I'm the president of the galaxy!' * Same Troper and best friend as directly above bring you this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EWFPBnjKkkQ * This troper did it for the first 15 minutes of the new NightmareOnElmStreet movie. * While watching The Incredible Hulk--->'''Blonsky''': He tossed a 20 ton forklift like it was nothing! --->'''Me''': *in his accent* He triiiiiiiiiied to kill me with a forklift! * When I'm with friends, we CANNOT sit through any movie without MSTing it. The first notable time I remember doing it was when I saw Revenge of the Fallen in theaters (ALL FOUR TIMES, and that's not to count all the DVD viewings), and the most recent was Iron Man 2. Hell, we rented Shawshank Redemption just to rip on it! Our MST of the ninth Pokemon movie gave us a new in-joke (It's the Wailord!), and I kept announcing "Title Drop!" when we saw Kick-Ass. * I have MSTed almost every movie I've seen. When dragged to see Eclipse by my girlfriend and mother (my girlfriend regretted it, as she thought it was terrible), I had the poor girl hysterical through most of the movie. The same thing happened while watching

''TheImaginariumOfDrParnassus'' and ''BeingJohnMalkovich'' at my best friend's birthday party. It wasn't until then that any of them realized my potential for humor. * This troper does this a lot. Recently, he has made fun of ''Jurassic Park'', giving the dinosuars voices and constantly telling the annoying characters to shut up being primary examples. Also cue obligatory ''Snakes on a Plane'' reference due to Sam Jackson's appearance. * This Troper dd a MST with his father watching My Neighbor Totoro. It helped that the theatre was empty so i could cross the line so many times... * This troper loves riffing movies, but knows that there is a special hell for people who talk in theaters. That's why she riffs them at home. * This troper and her mother recently riffed the remake of "The Hills Have Eyes", it all started when we referred to Beast the dog as "the only intelligent member of that family". * Played straight and averted on seperate occasions: I'm more than happy to riff on some movies like ''Twilight'' ("Edward looks less nervous now." "He's been [[ADateWithRosiePalms sucking his own blood. Relieves tension]].") and ''Eclipse'' ("Would you care for a shirt, sir?" "No thanks, I'm trying to give them up."), but some movies I just can't take being mocked while I'm watching them. * Whenever we have to watch a movie in English class after a book: RIFF TIME! My friends and I did really well with it with the romeo and Juliet modernized thing. Now I dub things dumb enough to be riffed, like the first episode of Season 9 of Smallville and Napoleon Dynamite * My neighborhood does improvised comedy contests every so often, and I get a kick out of MSTing our resident [[TheScrappy scrappy]]. ---> '''Scrappy:''' I'm Billy mays here, and I, uh, am here to produce something really cool---> '''Me:''' A baby? ---> ''*entire neighborhood cracks up*'' * My first viewing of EvilDead (Because I should actually watch the movie before seeing TheMusical [[{{Squee}} on November 7th]]) was basically this between [[DreamTeam me, my older sister, and my dad.]] --> '''Me''': Shovels. They chop off heads now. * This troper's friends and family all generally do this when we're bored with a movie. Between my father, brother and I, we also watch quite a bit of the real thing, too. * This Tropette is rather (in)famous for doing this. When I'm with friends, we do this no matter what, but I drive my science class crazy when I mock the movies our teacher leaves for us when he goes to coach volleyball *cough EVERYDAY cough* It's my little way of rebelling against his "lessons". * [[{{Tropers/Pittsburghmuggle}} This Troper]]'s mother and stepfather only had cable sporadically and when they did we never had Comedy Central. The first time I saw MST3K was at my Dad and Stepmom's house for Thanksgiving 1993 or 94. ''SantaClausConquersTheMartians'' was on and I laughed my head off. Watched the show when I could, which wasn't much. I only was able to buckle down and watch it on a regular basis in 1999, after getting married to a woman who had to have cable. Our

Saturday mornings (pre-children) were spent with coffee, cinnamon rolls and MST3K on Sci-fi. I work night shift at a front desk, and an episode can really make the time fly. These days I'm busy trying to collect the [=DVDs=]. Slow-going on our limited income, but it's happening. ** Okay, most people are talking about riffing. My wife's and my first date was to see ''{{Film/Stargate}}'', and when the circles with the symbols on them started rotating, I said "[[WheelOfFortune WHEEL! OF! FORTUNE!!!!]]" * [[{{Tropers/Bannermanonemillion}} This Troper]] and his friends get together whenever possible to enjoy Bad Movie Night and our riffing skills get better and better with each horrible film. It's a source of Geek Pride. * When watching {{Metropolis}} for the first time this trouper and her best friend did not know it was a silent movie... fifteen minutes in we started riffing it... it made the movie much more fun to say the least. * [[@/{{Pastylover2}} This troper]] does this to Series/DoctorWho. But I still love the show. * When a couple of friends and I went to a showing of [[{{ptitle1d5irnza}} 9]] a while ago, we were the only ones in the room. Naturally, we took full advantage of the situation and riffed the film as much as we could. It was one of the best screenings of that film that I've ever been to. * I MST3Ked for the movie 9 when it came out. "So the fate of the world is in charge of nine potato sack dolls? I'll remember that in 2012!" * [[{{Tropers/Wackd}} I]] did quite a lot of this in school, specifically in science class while watching educational videos, but there was one--an IMAX film on volcanoes called ''Ring of Fire''--that I thought was so bad that I borrowed it from my teacher and a friend of mine and I riffed it later that week. I can't actually remember any of the riffs besides one, a running gag where, any time it looked like there was going to be a shot of a crowd panicking and fleeing, he would yell "SALE AT WAL-MART!" and do little mutterings of all the other people in the scene whispering "Sale at Wal-Mart?" "Did he say sale at Wal-Mart?" "Oh, I can't miss that", and so forth. (Occasionally, there was a crowd shot that ''didn't'' desolve into mass panic, at which point he'd have the first guy mutter "False alarm" or something like that.) * This troper can't stop making jokes in {{Free Willy}}. [[IfYouKnowWhatIMean You know]] [[FreudWasRight which ones]]. Much to one employee's annoyance at his workplace. * Me and my group of friends absolutely love doing this to old animes and (not so old) video games. Especially common when we do multiplayer. Two examples from TheDishwasher: ** --> David (Me): Woah, what is that? Looks like a giant samurai. --> Jake: That's a Shogun. Its got a rocket launcher and jumps around a lot. --> David: ... So it plays {{Halo}}: CE? --> Jake: Y'know, I never really thought about that.

** --> Jake: Zombie sharks on legs... What could be worse than that? --> David: Mind controlling squids? --> Jake: Like in [[WorldOfWarcraft Wow]]? [[HilariousInHindsight God that would suck.]] --> (When we first met Squidface) Jake: OHMAIGAWD NO! NOT AGAIN! * {{Tropers/Mort08}} and her former best friend once did an affectionate MST of ''ChickenRun.'' It remains as one of her fondest memories of that friendship. ** Several years later, she finally watched the show after having her mom recommend it to her for several years. The first episode she watched was ''Hamlet,'' which wasn't that great. She decided to give it another chance, and the next episode she watched was ''Lost Continent.'' She's been an MST3K junkie ever since. * My best friend happens to love certain TV shows and such that I can't stand. Thankfully, she's one of those "True fans have no problem making fun of what they love" people, so whenever we're watching one of said TV shows, the both of us gleefully MST it together. Hell, we do it with things I love too, such as when we were both riffing music videos by my favourite band. * [[Tropers/KamuiValentine This troper]] was raised on MST3K and as such is pretty sure that it gave rise to my personality today. My favorite riff I've done was during Underworld: Rise of the Lycans. "You're doing it wrong! It doesn't go in her belly button! What the hell are you doing without lubricant! You're going to skin yourself alive at this rate! Seriously man grab the Crisco at least!" As such her friends have decided to use this if ever their roommates [[IfYouKnowWhatIMean need the room]] with them inside of it at the time. * My boyfriend and I do this while playing videogames on the Xbox 360. "Hello, [[DevilMayCry Dante.]]" "'Sup, [[DantesInferno Dante.]]" "Nice sword." "Nice scythe." * This troper habitually does this, even with movies/games/anime/shows he likes. He's even considering doing a series where he riffs anime episodes ([[SarcasmMode because nobody has ever thought of that]]). * This troper first heard about the show from her friend's older brother. Eventually I (moving to first person now) picked up a copy of "The Brain That Would not Die" at the local movie store, and have been watching it ever since. That also might be why I'm more used to the Mike-era episodes rather than the Joel-era ones... though I'm working on that. I also enjoy other forms of MSTing, and would like to try it myself... ---->''If you're wondering how they eat or breathe,'' ->''And other science facts,'' ->''Just repeat to yourself [[MST3KMantra "It's a wiki, I really should relax!"]]'' ->''For MysteryScienceTheater3000'' -->''*[[RecurringRiff twaaaang]]*'' <<|TroperTales|>>

MythologyGag * [[{{INFJeff}} This Troper's]] highschool drama had something of a coincidental MythologyGag this year. Last year they put on GuysAndDolls, whose plot focuses on crap games. This year, they put on AnythingGoes, and one character has a line: There's been more than enough crap games around here! * This troper (who was a synth player two years in a row for the highschool) had a personal one. The first year she worked in the musical, the play was Children of Eden. The second year, it was Zombie Prom, and in the final song of Zombie Prom there is a line that goes "From Eve and Adam to the atom bomb." On closing night, I figured out the connection, and had a little grin to myself as the musical ended. * [[Tropers/{{Optimusjamie}} This Troper]] will add a few of these to his English work. In one assessment: -> There were mysterious fores involved, but that they had conspired only to bring these angles together... Truly a match made in heaven! Then in another assessment a few months later: -> "Whatever forces conspired to bring us together... This is truly a match made in heaven!" * This troper tends to add his own mythology gags of other GTA games into his GTA gameplay, say i use a green sabre in an appropriate mission. I also do shout outs: After one mission in an office building, i walk out and call for a [[TheUsualSuspects black car to pick me up.]] * In this troper's fanfiction, he tends to refference things from different universe's or adaptions of the thing he wrote about. As well as refferencing his other fanfiction. Like, in one of the earlier chapters of my XMenEvolution story, I make refference to using the Danger Room to play Crash Bandicoot (Which I was previously known to write about) and when Spidey first guest starred, he makes refference to planning out what he will write in his own Crash Bandicoot Fanfiction. And in one chapter, Iceman gives Shadowcat a wedgie, which was intended as a nod because me and several other Crash Bandicoot writers were doing an online RP that degenerated from an undecided plot involving Dr Cortex into Nina Cortex giving everyone in the world wedgies. As for refferences to other universes and adaptions, I tend to name background mutants after ones from the comics, and when they read the blog for a school bully, they act shocked by his listed dislikes of inculding 'Hugh Jackman', to who they insist is a national treasure. One of Taskmaster's first lines when he appears is to tell Bullseye, who just destroyed his mask to reveal his facial disfigurment, [[MarvelVsCapcom3FateOfTwoWorlds "You are the Ass kickee, I am the Ass kick-er!"]] Later in the same arc, Norman Osborn, who is yet to don thr Goblin suit in my universe, looks at his reflection on a billboard, causing his skin to look green and make him look like a Goblin. The Transformers guest star in my second 'Evo Team ups' story, a Nod to my previous attempt to write a Transformers fanfiction that would have been in the same universe. And lastly, many costume designs for new characters are moddelled after what they wore in XMenLegends.

---Go back to the MythologyGag. <<|TroperTales|>>

Nakama * All of the tropers on ThisVeryWiki. Think about it: many of us spend more time on the wiki than we do with the people around us. We [[CrowningMomentOfFunny laugh]] together, we [[TearJerker cry ]] together, share our most [[FetishFuel intimate]] secrets with each other. We might not always get [[EditWar along]], but we ''will'' always stick together. Thank you, TVTropes. ** ''{high-fives you}'' *** ''{high-tens the both of you}'' *** ''{high-twenties all three of you}'' *** ''{high-large-numbers every single troper} I love you guys! *** There's something in [[DJMarred my]] eye... **** [[TastesLikeDiabetes That's so corny...^^]] ** [[LadyAmi I]] propose a toast. To all of us! (^^,) ** I never really thought about it that way... But it's true, isn't it? We are sort of a family. ''{hugs all of you}'' ** [[Tropers/AdelePotter *sniffle*]] [[CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming Th-that's so beautiful.]] ** While I like the TV Tropes community, I don't spend more time on the Wiki than I do with the people around me. nor do I share my most intimate secrets on here. So I;m not part of a 'Nakama', and feel that this is just a website. A good website, mind you ... * This troper has been out of college five years and STILL considers her four best college friends this. It was first three of us, then one's twin brother from another college, and lastly my roommate my last semester became the fifth. To think, *I* brought this group of BFFs together... <*tear*> This troper also has one BFF that she's known for almost 20 years (since Girl Scouts!) whose daughter she considers her "niece." I would die for any one of them, full stop. * This troper, in all honesty, doesn't know whether or not her nakama exists anymore. Though a great many of us still keep in touch, we're not as close-knit as we used to be in high school, and, frankly, a lot of us don't even speak to each other anymore. This troper's life is hell right now, what with the lack of a job, taking the semester off due to money troubles, and being stuck with her father's {{Yandere}} of a girlfriend all day long...[[TearJerker I just want my family back]]. ** [[YouAreNotAlone *hug*]] * This Troper's nakama started when we were all members of the high school anime club. Most of us have graduated, but we still accept people who are still in said high school anime club. Although things can be really difficult sometimes (we have a lot of members with some form of depression), we're all really close and we care about each other like a family. (As of now, most of our members are running

around with [[OnePiece an X drawn on our left arms in Magic Marker]]) * [[{{Tropers/Dysfunctional}} My]] nakama consists of friends dating back to middle school and various others who joined us because we were all outcasts at one time or another or because of relations with other members, but when me and my brother (best friend not by blood) were in middle school we were looked down on until people started trying to be like us. we sold pills and did stupid stuff like that until everyone either hated us or wanted to be our best friends.... this changed in high school where I was promptly kicked out 9th grade year and was allowed back in 11th year after a series of placements. my brother got his GED while in placements and half of the nakama dropped out and got jobs. the rest of us are back to being outcasts for our last year(for most), but we are the considered the cool outcasts considering the other outcasts are singled out and tormented(which we try,not very successfully, to stop). Nowadays out of school some of us have made their own nakamas which we keep a healthy amount of interaction besides the few exceptions. the ones that are still with us are considered closer than family and were all ready to do just about anything for each other. I may not have much going for me in life but friends is one thing I do have and I love it. Family Remains Eternal, Stop Hating. ** update:apparently its not eternal. this same troper's nakama has went through a schizm and the two groups are on the verge of splitting further, and I've lost my brother, though I would never consider my him as a brother after what happened. in fact I guess I gained a most hated enemy in him. this is basicly the darkest hour for most of us. and i know ill fail the "who are you in the dark" test if given the chance, and it gets worse: the other closest person i have whos side i took in this matter(surprisingly mostly because she was in the right and only slightly for other motives mentioned shortly) will probably end up in a relationship with just as much of a dick as the former because i cant bring myself to face the chance of rejection and cant tell her my true feelings(though they should be obvious) for her because of how our previous romantic relationship went. i mean this is way to much pressure for a god damn kid who only turns 17 in 5 days(yeah shaping up to be so enjoyable) * [[@/{{EPIC}} This Troper]], his twin, and his elder brother are part of a RagtagBunchOfMisfits called the [[{{TroperWorks/EPICOretachi}} EPIC!-tachi]] , and it was founded from the time when he was a fifth grader. ** Two more members joined up during his grade six years, which were the troper's best friend and his twin's best friend. Later, during Grade 7, two more members joined up and they were our cousins too. And they were twins, one of which is my blood brother. * This troper joined up with the US Civil Air Patrol several months ago, and was amused by the ''multiple'' nakamas present: the [=NCOs=] stick together, as do the junior enlisted men, as do the officers. Some guys, like me, can move up above their station (I talk to the [=NCOs=] all the time), but most people just stick with their individual Nakama. * This troper's core {{Nakama}} is literally a constantly evolving organism. Certain members bring their friends into the circle, but

then, they themselves leave, while the person they brought in becomes even more a part of TheSquad than the person who introduced them. * The Gay-Lesbian Alliance at [[DesertDragon this troper's]] first college was like this. There were only a dozen of us and we became quite close over the course of two years. However, the trope is partially subverted in that there was no lack of romance. Those who didn't directly sleep with each other were only two trysts (at most) removed from doing so. ** Sounds like this troper's experience, only, in my very, very tight group of friends nobody has ever dated eachother. We are all a RagTagGangofMisfits/TokenTeam who actually met at "Coming Out" support meeting for closeted students the first week of class and have been glued to the hip ever since. In our Gay-Lesbian Alliance at large, there are so many of us you can't be close to all of them, but we support eachother, stick up for eachother, love eachother (and yes, sleep with eachother like [[AllGaysArePromiscuous the stereotypes]]} and really are...community. * This troper's Nakama currently consists of himself, his roommate, his roommate's best friend, and his roommate's best friend's roommate. We're trying to expand. * This Troper's university has a resident Nakama of geeks of every persuasion, at least a few (and up to a few dozen) members of which can always be found in the corner of the uni cafe. While it is a large group (probably at least a hundred people) and newcomers are quickly welcomed, the bond between its members is that of a genuine Nakama. * [[{{Tropers/gs68}} This troper]]'s high school student council. More specifically, his graduating class's class council in his senior year. While we didn't do jack shit, it was somewhat like a second family to him. * This troper has had a friend since kindergarden-this friend is now regarded as a brother, and even this troper's dad refers to him as a "second son". Nakama is pretty much the only word that adequately describes it. * [[{{Tropers/Chica Musica}} This troper]] has a group of friends whom she is close to, but nothing that stands out. I look at the {{nakama}} on this page and certain animes or shows and she can't help but feel jealous. Her nakama isn't every exclusive to each other and most of said friends have nakamas of their own. It's only every once in a while that that special closeness is felt. * Just about every High School Drama Club is like this to some extent... at least mine was. I assume sports teams as well, but I don't really have first hand knowledge on that one. ** Seconded. This troper feels at least as close to his theater friends as to his biological family. ** Thirded. *** That's pretty typical, [[{{Tropers/Nettik}} this troper]] has always found theatre groups to be insanely close... sometimes a little ''too close''... ** Not only [[AcrossTheStars this troper's]] theatre club, but also her Advanced Acting class. Yeah, we are tight. ** [[{{Tropers/RabidRainbow}} This troper]] was part of a production of TheLaramieProject at her school, which culminated in us performing

it three times in one day for the student body. It was condensed into an hour long production, but that day was so emotionally trying and exhausting because of the subject and the intense speech at the very end by Matthew Shepard's dad (who was being played by our best actor) that the Theater Kid bond that had always been there for years took on new meanings. ** The improv group that [[{{Tropers/Nausicaa}} this troper]] is in is definitely this. We haven't been around for long (the group was only formed last year), but we're shaping out to be a pretty sprawling, cross-campus extended family. [[TheSmurfettePrinciple Shame there are only around three girls in this one...]] ** This. There's something about acting (probably the stage fright) that really bonds people together. *** Along with stage fright, we have quick costume changes either backstage or in a cramped, sometimes unisex, dressing rooms. Theater causes people to lose their modesty and once it's gone it's very easy to make friends. * This troper joined the sci-fi club senior year of high school. More than six years later, we're still a Nakama - we call ourselves The Fellowship. * This troper is a member of a group like this, which formed out of a string of AIM chats that were originally created two years ago as a sort of backstage planning zone for a [[PlayByPostGames forum RP]]. Of course, we're like family in more than one way: the only thing we all have in common is that we were in the aforementioned RP and had AIM when the chat was formed or acquired it not long after, so, unsurprisingly, there's lots of arguments and bickering and pretty much everyone has at least one other member whom they can't stand. (Also, the chat has divided into two factions that hate each other, the first thinking the second is a bunch of idiots and the second thinking the first is a bunch of arrogant [[{{Jerkass}} jerkasses]]. We're a dysfunctional family.) ** [[{{Tropers/JRSpaniel}} This troper]] is a member of the same. You guys are awesome. (Except for that one guy. You know who it is.) * This troper's friends from 6th form are like this. Most of the group has gone separate ways, ending up with a core of four people. A recent example of the bonding was when this troper drank far too much on a night out, and was dragged out of the bar by the other two present and packed into a taxi, while almost too drunk to stand. This was explained to him the day after during a sidequest to retrieve everything he'd meant to come home with the previous night. * [[{{Tropers/LullTheConqueror}} This troper]] is a member of a "noncollege-based fraternity" known as &#946;&#959;&#945;&#966; (that actually means something, but you're not cleared to know what). It's actually only five or six guys, and the basic mission could be described as "[[RefugeInAudacity see what we can get away with]]." It's definitely a {{Nakama}}, but one with a secret handshake and Greek initials for no readily apparent reason. * This troper's closest friends from High School were all befriended in very strange circumstances: I became close with the first friend when we beat the crap out of each other after this troper stole his pencil, and later, we littered our grade school classroom with paper

airplanes. The second was befriended with this troper going around "stealing" people's souls with a cookie box and a lot of paper. The third was befriended just because we said so. The last was befriended with this troper proclaiming her a lesbian outside the restroom she was in. And we've been close even up to now. * [[{{Tropers/GwenStacyWannabe}} This troper]]'s home forum is like this, since 80% of us know each other in RealLife and the forum is really just a way of talking when we can't see each other face-toface. (We'd be a FiveManBand too, except there's like 7 or 8 of us...and I'm TeamMom, which is sort of [[{{Squick}} weird]] if we think too long about it because my boyfriend is [[TheHero The Administrator]].) * Nakama definitely sums up this tropers circle of friends. One friend has been around since grade school, and I'm like an overprotective big sister to her. Another two from sixth grade on, and are like her sisters as well. Now this troper has found two nakama in her school band, one who is like another sister, another like a little brother. There is also some of my biological older sister's boyfriend and a couple of her friends. But the shining example of nakamahood is between this troper and her best friend. We've been together since we were five, and have always been there for one another, including a time when I broke my leg sledding down a hill and she packed it in ice to numb the pain. (which combines [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome Crowning Moment of Awesome]] with [[CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming Crowning Moment of Heartwarming]]. * This troper actually has THREE Nakama - the group that formed out of my old high-school anime club, the group from an old messageboard I frequented, and the group known as Team Demon Chess (being a Nakama united around a setting we all work on). ** {{Tropers/Cybele}} too has three nakama--the people I befriended when I would just hang out in the band room, internet, and the group I roll with at my community college. Thanks to the wonders of Tv Tropes, I managed to explain to my friends on the concept of nakama, and they all agree that that is the best term that describes us. ** By the looks of it, it seems This Troper will soon have three nakama too. There's one that has been there since very early childhood (I met my best friend when we were dumped on the same couch before neither of us could even crawl), and one relatively large group I bonded with in eighth grade. Now it seems like I'm getting this close with some people I met in high school - interestingly, one of the members of the eighth grade nakama belongs to this third one as well. * [[{{Tropers/AcrossTheStars}} This troper]] has been best friends with the same girl since we were six years old - we grew up down the street from each other. She is, essentially, my sister, to the point where my parents refer to her as their "third child" and hers refer to me as their "second daughter". * This Troper, Troper's best friend, Troper's Sister. Troper and Sister are both little sisters to the (female) Best Friend, who is Troper's older ''brother'' and we've labelled any LesYay moments between Troper and Best Friend to be Twincest... * [[{{Tropers/DaNuke}} Da_Nuke]] found his Nakama in high school: first by meeting his best friend in athletics, then by gathering with

another three guys for his team jobs, then by going at the same place for social service (in Mexico you must do social service to pass high school). Two of them split away after going to different colleges, but so far, they still remain a Main/PowerTrio (complete with id, superego and ego). * [[{{Tropers/Otempora}} This troper]] has two {{Nakama}}: one on the Internet, with a writing board she frequents, and one in real life, with her French class. Really. * This troper had a similar relationship with his Spanish class in 11th grade. It got to the point where we called ourselves the "Spanish IV family", even t hough we were a pretty diverse group. * The convention staff behind Atsuicon is a Nakama in this troper's opinion, definitely. A handfull of disparate people with different skills and abilities that pulled together and managed to build something really awesome and form some really solid friendships along the way. * [[{{Tropers/YoAdrian}} This troper]] and her three best friends are like this. We call each other sisters, all parents get "Mom" and "Dad", regardless of who they actually gave birth to, and even after one of our number moved 1200 miles away, we're still having hour-long conversations every other day. I'm closer to them than to my actual brother. Also, my college choir is moving towards this - the inside jokes and shared aggravations have that effect. * [[{{Tropers/JapaneseTeeth}} This troper's]] circle of close friends from high school are an almost perfect example of this. Despite the fact that after going off to college we don't talk a lot and only see each other about 5 or 6 times a year. Still got each others backs though, no matter how much we screw with each other or piss each other off. I treat them all as if they were my brothers and sisters. * Despite people not liking each other (especially [[{{Radioactive Zombie}} me]]) in my Sea Cadets unit, we help each other out. Most egregious was in Boot Camp, where people actually cried when the AIRPOC had to be demoted due to constant sickness (everyone thought he was being sent home). ** Also a major symptom for this troper's stories. Despite not liking each other in both the {{Shadowrun}} MUD he's played and in the stories he's written, they ''ALWAYS'' band together. Unless they owe money. * There's one guy that I've been friend with since I was like ten, we've always stuck together because we always wanna do the exact same things, but because I prefer to be in a small close group then a big one i can think of three other groups of people that are pretty much like this to me. * [[{{Tropers/JBridge}} I've]] gained and lost a few friends over the years, but there's one guy that I can never quite shake off. I think I summed it up best when I said to him "If I were gay, you'd still be a really good friend." That's when you know a friendship lasts- when you can insult the guy to his face and he shrugs it off. No, there is no HoYay between us. * [[{{Tropers/Shaon}} This Troper]] has a few groups she'd like to call Nakama. One would be the online group she knows best as /haikon/ but, after breaking up and reforming, currently goes by /door/. The

other would be the marching band she is a part of. As well, the troper has a pair of role-playing characters, a [[{{Creatures}} Norn]] and an almost-human who are somewhere between this and HeterosexualLifePartners. * This troper belongs to two Nakamas. The first being known as the Triad, consisting of himself and two very close friends. More impressive is the second, UNB, which consist of a group of individuals he's only spoken to online. This nakama has existed for close to FIVE YEARS. * This troper, her church's youth group advisor, explained the concept of a Nakama to the kids, who liked it and ran with it. ''Nakama'' has become the youth group's unofficial name -- the kids now even wear tshirts with the word on them -- and the first question on their website's FAQ explains the definition. ** Additionally, just to show how centered the Nakama has become over its three years of existence, the kids pooled their money to present the troper with a Mother's Day gift... a heart-shaped crystal paperweight engraved with the words "[[CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming Every 'Nakama' needs a Mama.]]" * This troper has found herself in a Nakama and she doesn't even know why. There's the Troper, the Best Friend, the Best Friend's Ex Boyfriend, the Troper's coworker and the Best Friend's Ex Boyfriend's Friend. We're all very protective of each other, encourage and support each other. * I have a real life nakama and a separate internet nakama. They both formed by accident. * This troper has had two Nakamas so far in his life. One was being part of the staff of the Skuna River Review, which was the newspaper staff for his high school. He stayed on it for three straight years, meeting multiple people that he is almost certain that he would never have met otherwise and was extremely sad when he was forced to quit because of the school switching over to a new block schedule. What happened when he found out was definitely a combination of Crowning Moment of Awesome and Heartwarming but that's a story for another time. He still keeps in touch with everybody that he met through those three years and he hasn't drifted away from a single one of them yet. His other nakama is a clan, Dragons of Destiny, that he joined up with on a forum over three years ago that he still considers a second true family, even if it's one of the most dsyfunctional families that he's ever seen before. But, even with that small problem, he has a lot of wonderful memories from all of the time that he has spent there and is still spending. * This troper is for the most a loner so when I use the word friend I mean nakama. My FiveManBand from highschool go so far as to call each others' parents mom and dad. * [[{{Tropers/Horngeek}} This troper]] is currently in year 11 at school, and the year 12s at my youth group are like this. Also, I'd say that one of my friends at school is like this. The twist is, that his parents and mine were in the same bible study when we were both born... and there was no input from either pair of parents when we became friends. * This troper has one set of Nakama she's had since she moved towns at

the age of nine, and a much larger one she picked up in college. Officially we're a science fiction club, but in practice we're more like a support group (mixed with a "[[RuleOfFun How much fun can we have]], and [[RefugeInAudacity how weird can we make it?]]" contest). We're all screwed up - just in different ways. The great thing about banding together with weird people is that you can ''always'' find someone who knows what you're going through. ** Many members of this troper's {{Nakama}} formed intra-bonds with each other over shared pains and joys. * [[{{Tropers/Muselette}} This troper]] thinks of her core group of college friends as Nakama. She especially thought this about two of them when--after classes had ended for the summer--they drove halfway across the state just to surpise her for her birthday. It means more when you understand how this troper has most always been horribly disappointed on her birthday and stopped looking forward to it altogether after the year it went completely unacknowledged by even her parents. ** This troper had the EXACT same experience. Due to a JerkAss father, this troper wound up deciding that his birthday was no longer a reason to celebrate. His own {{Nakama}} (a group of friends, enemies-turnedfriends, friends/enemies, friends/love-interests, who all came together through ways too convuluted and complex and bizarre to fit on this page) surprised the hell out of him by throwing him a birthday party in one of the A-list nightclubs in New York with all his friends in attendance. In fact, they treated him like such a star that one random stranger admitted that she'd mistaken him for some sort of celebrity. That is why this troper would rather suffer gallstones than lose his Crew. * This trope totally describes [[{{Tropers/AbuDhabi this troper's]] [=DnD=] party, in a play-by-post game. We have... A paranoid mage who doesn't trust the psion much farther than his Strength 10 could throw him, and suspects most of the other partymembers might be secretly in cahoots with him. A shapeshifting psion who is involved in some very shady affairs, and tries to look entirely harmless. A paladin who thinks everyone is best friends, and would kick some serious arse if she found out that there's mistrust among the team. A magical swordsman, the psion's best friend, although he's scared pretty good by some of the shapeshifter's dealings. Finally, there's the elf trickster cleric, mostly oblivious to what is happening - but there are some rumours that someone in the party plans to make the paladin fall. * TwoWords: Anime Clubs. You know what I mean. ** Yes, I do. *** As do [[{{Tropers/loracarol}} I]]. I ended up the leader of the Anime Club this year, and (somehow) I'm now a sort of "TeamMom". I love my club, though. And I ''will'' [[MamaBear beat you up]] if you hurt ''any'' of them. ^_~ * This troper considers the entire human species to be his Nakama. He wishes it were otherwise. * High school marching bands are like this. Even if you can't stand most of your section members, you'll bond with people from other sections, and when graduation day comes, [[TearJerker someone will

cry]]. Maybe not everyone, but someone will. ** I second that. If there isn't some sort of camaraderie between everyone, it's pretty hard to feel unified and part of something, let alone make it to state competitions every year. ** Thirded. Some member of my high school band held a reunion not too long ago. Just about all the sections were reperesented one way or another. I was really the first string player that my school's music program ever had, and now the school has an ''orchestra!'' * This troper was part of his old college's student-TV station. Even when that particular Nakama fell apart after graduation, many members spun off their own Nakamas, which in some ways became even stronger than the original. * This troper has had two Nakamas, the first during high school, where the classmates of his AP classes banded together, ending up doing Ultimate Frisbee and the high school version of College Bowl together to boot. Later in College, I met my current Nakama mostly through the local gaming club, now we're all adults and play D+D and hang out all the time and do our best to help each other out. Hell, mere weeks after I introduced my S.O. to the group, everyone wants to help her too. * This troper never had nakama until very late in secondary school, when they finally got together with their SO. From this core, the nakama spread itself out and absorbed entire cliques. It is not a terribly large school and cliques were weak so it wasn't terribly difficult. Now, our nakama includes about ninety people, from the goths, the nerds, the jocks who don't want to be jocks, the emos, the otaku, and the band geeks (including the future rock stars). The main problem is that nakama reach critical mass, and this one is already bloated as hell. We believe the reason it hasn't shattered is due to the semi-centralised nature of it. Everyone is tied together by degrees of separation, rather than knowing everyone personally, we trust each other implicitly because of the people we know between them. further helping this along is that we stopped being the sole core of it a while ago, the core being about ten people now. Regardless, we're still waiting for it to shatter, which will probably be when we graduate from secondary school. * For this troper, it's the staff of the anime convention he works with. Our first year went really badly, but during the time we really sort of banded together and formed a core like this. * This troper's Nakama probably has been mentioned already due to the massive amount of people on the forum who are also tropers but she is part of a writing forum which is really a lot more than that. There is more there than just writing as there is also random talk, art boards, roleplays and a place to just hang out. There is even a TeamMom who is the kindest and most inspirational person you could ever known. This troper is not the [[{{TheSnarkKnight}} kind of person that would be pleasant to hang out with in real life]] but that forum has made her feel welcome and accepted despite that, unlike any other place in her life. She knows she could sing that place's praises until the cows come home but probably most other tropers won't be too happy. * [[{{Tropers/Chzo}} This Troper]] has had a few of these over time. His current, and closest, {{Nakama}} consists of him (the "brawn"), a

pair of twin siblings (one of them definitely the brains), their yearyounger brother (the neurotic), a small white geeky videogame nerd in the body of a very large and intimidating-looking Somalian (the running out of titles), and another geeky white boy. We don't know what brought us together. * [[{{Tropers/PacSol}} This Troper]] is an officer at a college anime club, and his fellow officers are a Nakama to him. He's closer to these guys than he is to his own family. * Subverted by [[{{Tropers/DrakeDarkhunter}} this troper]] and his friends we dubbed "The 1337 Three." We've known eachother for years and while we are friends, we don't really get along that well. We fight alot and one of us rarely interacts with us anymore. And the two that do are often fighting. And just to make sure it's a subversion, while we'll always have contact with eachother. There's no loyalty, we won't defend eachother and are quick to screw any of the others for short term gain. Still there might be something heartwarming here... doubt it though.. * It's not very long before any new friend of this Troper (Jinxed Blackcat) gets absorbed into her very confusing 2 Nakama families in one. Since she had one Nakama where she's the 'baby' sister to two or more older sisters and one where's she's the oldest sister with Nakama parents.. Unbeknownst to her (at first) said Nakama Mama (had to borrow that it's fun to say) is best friends/sisters with this ones older sister Nakama...X_x Some familial issues had to be worked out XD * This troper has at least three. One she's living with, one she went to high school with, and one she rarely speaks to but would readily drive the four hours it takes to get to her were she needed. Her little brother seems to have been absorbed into this as well. * [[{{Tropers/Mariko-chan}} This troper]] has a few. The one on [[{{GaiaOnline}} Gaia Online]], which she calls her 'Digi Ohana'. Then there are her friends from middle school, and now her high school buddies. (She had to move to a different part of the island, and thus could not go to the same school as her middle school ohana.) * This troper has known her best friend for over eleven years. Her family has moved three times, the first time was when we were only in first grade. We've grown up states apart, but still managed to stay best friends all this time. * This troper has a mini-nakama that consists of her two best friends (who are, incidentally, her only friends). Amusingly (to us), everyone else thinks that we're in a three-way relationship. We're not. Seriously. * This troper has found nakama in her shared-housing community. She thinks of it as her second family, with new grammas and a big sister. Also, she was part of a somewhat-large nakama during high school, some members calling each other their brothers, sisters, moms, dads...Older members tended to call the younger ones "my son/daughter" if they were close enough. * Almost all of [[{{Tropers/JohnnyBGoode}} this troper]]'s friends (about seven or eight at last count) have banded together like this, and we talk about almost everything together and spend as much time together as we can/want to. * This troper has two - one formed during several years of

{{Neverwinter Nights}} gaming, known as the "[[{{Doomy Dooms of Doom}} Triad of Doom]]" ... and yes, you guessed it, there are four of us. The other is composed of our six-member offline gaming group, which is still surprisingly very close despite half the group leaving - two moving away and the third joining the Army and being deployed to VietNam. There IS overlap - this troper and one other are members of both groups. The tales among us in either case are legendary enough that references to [[{{Noodle Incident}} "Field of Boulders", "Caber Tossing", "Purple", and several otherwise-innocuous statements]] immediately send every single one into fits of laughter. I leave it to you to figure out which of those are gaming references and which are actual real-life occurrences. * A bit of a RL CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming , but this troper's best friend is fairly vitriolic, and one day we had what could be described as a "falling out". After about a week of not talking to one another, he turns out to have forgotten his science coursework in science, so I gave him mine to hold up when the teacher asked, and then I helped him finish it through the science lesson. When the inevitable: "Why'd you help?" came, I got a great AlwaysWantedToSayThat moment: "You're my nakama". Helps he's also a troper, and a fan of One Piece, though... * As would be expected, there are several Nakamas in this troper's year in high school. This troper himself is not a part of one. Rather, he flits between several nakamas. You know, like an absentee father who goes and bangs another woman and get chummy with her family, then leaves them to return to the welcoming arms of his original family? * This troper is the meeting point of several Nakamas. There's his friends from a few years back, his friends from university, his friends from elsewhere, and his friends 'in virtual'. He's pretty much the guaranteed one of know someone who knows someone who can find something out, within reason. Don't ask for an [[AKA47 interesting device]] because those aren't legally providable. * This troper's guild from World of Warcraft. She loves them to bits, even the ones she's never met before (we're a large guild, with between 90 and 110 accounts at any given time). Best days of her life were the two days she got to meet ten or so of them (just so happens this troper can't count...) IRL - said ten-or-so became even closer knit than the rest of the guild in the following months, despite our interests spanning a wide spectrum, from active-IRL raids-on-weekends types to us hardcore logs-on-for-sake-of-it roleplayers. A sort of micro-nakama, if you will. There have been a couple of times where we have stuck up for each other ''just because'' we shared that experience. * This troper discovered that he was part of a nakama without knowing it; a complicated incident left him being honest-to-god cyber-harassed by a girl at his school. What ensued was one of the most badass things he's ever encountered-- seven people he was friends with to varying degrees with (including four seniors-- the troper and the harasser both being freshmen), banding together in a "You fuck with (troper), we fuck you up" troupe of ''death'', which ultimately resulted in the troper finally breaking free of his old group of not-really-friends. Part of the tears shed that day were from breaking under pressure; the rest were from the sheer awesome of the roaring rampage of revenge his

friends went on. Fuck yeah, [[ThePowerOfFriendship friendship power]]. * This troper's school nakama started out, as far as I know, as two or three socially outcast girls. One year later there's nine of us, from Year 8 to Year 10, and I had the distinction of being TheOneGuy until a few months ago. * This troper's group is informally known as The Party, and we all roughly conform to RPG/[=DnD=] character classes. This Troper's the Paladin. His Heterosexual Life Partner is the Rogue. The Bard, Fighter, Monk, and Cleric round out the party. * [[{{Tropers/MeiYouMayo}} This Troper's]] nakama consists of herself and her three closest guy friends. It started out with just me and one boy becoming friends in elementary school, and the other two sort of found their way into the fold during middle school and the early part of freshman year. This Troper sometimes has to act as TeamMom (what else can you be when you're best friends with three judgment and social skill-impaired teenage boys?), but she considers them to be the brothers she never had. * This troper is a... subversion? He joined a nakama in sophomore year, mostly just to get help in school, pretending to care about everyone else. He slowly started Becoming the Mask, actually helping his friends, but This Troper, after an incident, realized he cares nothing for the people in his nakama. * My Book Club is like this. It's a big, huggy, dysfunctional notfamily. Gives me the warm fuzzies thinking about it. * This troper is part of two. One, my friend for most of my life and her family, to the extent that her parents are my Mom and Dad and her little sister is my little sister The other includes my [[HeterosexualLifePartners closest friend]] and a few friends we've had since grade 9. I'm also a sort of SixthRanger Nakama member in the music department, as my friend from the first Nakama is a big part of that group. * I am very proud to be a part of FOUR nakamas at my high school and related areas. The main one is loose and big, so big it may be considered a small army in it's own right with 15 to twenty kids (haven't done a head count in a while and we're always growing because we take in the outcasts of school society), because of my wheelchair the Special Ed kids accept me as part of their Nakamas even though I'm not in their all day class with them, the Nakamas on the special ed bus (where I've adopted a elementary kid as a son/younger brother) and then the smallest Nakama only of three people. But we protect our own in each and always accept more. * {{Tropers/Arutoa}} is part of one which he named "The LOL Brigade". Due to the sad term known as 'timezones', he's had to make himself nocturnal, much to the dislike of his actual family. * [[{{Tropers/JRSpaniel}} This troper]] considers his band of furry friends a family/Nakama. I love you guys! * [[{{Tropers/Pocketwatch}} This troper's]] real-life nakama became a horrible mess and is currently not worthy of the term anymore, and a newer one is starting to form (somehow!), but she still has her mod nakama who (ssh!) spend most of the time they aren't actually working on anything important to the forum/[[GaiaOnline guild]] chatting in the hidden moderator subforum about whatever it is they're interested

in at the moment. And squishing on eachother when anything goes horribly wrong irl and someone needs consoling. As the Vice-Captain said: ->Hey now, don't make me make a no fraternizing rule. Next thing I know you'll be making guild babies. * [[{{Tropers/MisterAlways}} This troper]] doesn't have any. Which sucks. ** You've got us. * This troper's Nakama is more than just my closest friends. It's my closest friends, my closest friends friends, and my closest friends friends friends. * {{Tropers/pika150}} used to be part of a really close Nakama called Random Misfits, there were about 7-8 members and we originally met on the Nsider forums. Sadly we have gone our seperate ways and are no longer active. * [[{{Tropers/mimichan3}} This troper]] has a habit of thinking of everyone as her family. Her family(obviously), her friends, her classmates, her online pals, people that troll her on Youtube... It can really be said that this troper is very strange. But hey, you can never have enough family, right? I'd love to see the reunion! * This troper got rid of his one and only nakama......it was for the better. * This troper has one of the tightest Nakamas she can imagine. It includes {{The Smart Guy}}s, {{The One Guy}}, the {{Token Evil Teammate}}, and {{The Lancer}}. (We trade {{Woobie}} duties). I have spent nearly three-quarters of my life with one of them. We don't have group names like some of these examples (unless you count the Crazy Contingent, and that's just two of us), and a lot of us seem like {{Vitriolic Best Buds}} to outsiders, but I'd do anything for this bunch. * This troper's Nakama started at camp when she had lost her role models and another girl she was acquainted with was without the friends from last year. We started hanging out a lot, and because of a mutual hatred of at least one of our separate roommates, we decided that she could move into the extra bed in my bunk and help me keep my cool when a particular bitch in my bunk started getting to me (there were four beds per bunk, so we basically were made up of one bitch who couldn't stop whining, one neutral girl, and two girls that helped each other keep from biting the bitch's head off). One day, I was taking a nap after a horrible headache during rest hour. And I was woken up by obnoxiously loud girls in the hallway. I proceeded to get up and shout until my face was red. Afterwards, two of the girls came to my bunk and apologized, and I gave them a half-awake apology myself. Those two girls became me and my friend's friends. We decided to move in together when our old roommates went back home. These girls were the ones I ran to when I was lonely at boarding school. These girls were the ones I cried to over the things and people I lost. These were the people who held me, stood up for me, loved me... they were real friends before I actually knew what a real friend was. In return, I've held them while they cried, I've mothered them (to one of the girls' chagrin, but I know she loves it), and loved them back. Through fights, tears, protection, comfort, memories, and

understanding, I wouldn't flinch from saying that I would take a bullet for any one of these girls. They are my Nakama and God help anyone who dares hurt them. * TV Tropes is everyone's Nakama! <3 ** [[TVTropesWillRuinYourVocabulary Because tropers actually speak my language!]] [[SayItWithHearts <3]] * {{Tropers/Miso}} has two major Nakama on the Internet and three in real life. On the internet, this consists of her {{Woobie}} friend and her more perverted friend, but she manages to keep a close relationship with both. In real life, she and three of her male cousins are Nakama to a fault: Her music-geek, over-30 cousin, her jocky-but-nerdy teenage cousin, and her Pokemon-geek, child cousin. The music geek shares her metalhead trait, the jocky-but-nerdy one makes her laugh every time she sees him, and the Pokemon-geek is pretty much her gaming buddy. * This troper recently started training to be a train operator/motoman. Surprisingly, he and his classmates, hit it off really well. While maybe we're not best friends, there's something about being in training together that engenders loyalty. It also helps that their instructors are really cool. * [[{{Tropers/Rushi}} This troper]] has had one since her second year of high school (she's now 20). It started with [[{{Tsundere}} her]], her [[DefrostingIceQueen best friend]] at the time and a {{Moe}} girl from the year below her who became a [[BigBrotherComplex little sister]] to the pair of them. Her [[JerkWithAHeartOfGold boyfriend]] eventually joined in, and he brought his [[GentleGiant friend]] with him. Even though we've later become a little less close, this troper would still quite happily die for any of them. * This troper and her lurker best friend have been friends since preschool. Our friendship's withstood not having gone to school with each other since preschool, her moving to another city for three years, and every kind of trauma in between. Frankly, I'm lucky to have met her. * This troper's Nakama is her school's stage crew. Because it's a big school with a lot going on, we can end up spending 10 to 20 hours a week with them. Most of us just live in the auditorium even when there's nothing going on because we love each other so much. * This troper has essentially had the exact same group of close friends since she moved here, three years ago. There's others in the 'circle' too, and they come and go, but at the core there's ''always'' been the four of us. We're practically our own clique. * [[{{Tropers/Capricorn}} This troper]] will be the first to admit itI'm a JerkAss. Psychopathic, evil, controlling. It's a small miracle I haven't killed anyone yet. And yet I've managed to curb my feelings and act genuinely nice to people when my friends are around- friends that I'm amazed I've managed to make and keep for 2-3 years straight. We're all pretty intelligent, when you get down to it. * This troper considers everyone on an online forum for MyLifeAsATeenageRobot she is a member of (And been a member since day 1) her close-knit friends and second family. * The Art Guild at [[{{Tropers/Nettik}} this troper's]] college. * I'm pretty sure the local ham radio club fits this description. They

talk to each other more often than most, and man do they ''talk!'' * [[{{Tropers/TheRenaissanceRaver}} This Troper]] has at least two major Nakama in real life. ** The first is the renaissance faire that she was practically born into, and a lot of people were called "Aunt," "Uncle," or "Cousin" until she was about 9. One of the families that's part of it might as well be her ''other'' family, complete with two younger siblings and another set of parents that invade the house for a third of the year on weekends. ** The second formed when she moved back to her old home-state of Washington when she was 11 - she still has the same core of friends from 6th and 7th grades of middle school. She is currently a junior in high school. It has shrunk slightly as friends of hers have either a) gone to different schools, b) moved to another city entirely, or c) graduated, but the ones she might as well call siblings she keeps in contact with a lot. She has also taken in a number of underclassmen as well as they've entered her classes/randomly encountered her in the halls/on the street. *** One of these underclassmen also helped discover her {{Berserk Button}} because of what could be an abusive online wannabe-boyfriend. The faker has also supposedly passed away, and This Troper, being {{The Empath}}, was more than happy to help not only try and confirm his death (despite not liking the guy at ''all'' and being sick at the time) but to also provide a comforting shoulder to cry on. This prompted the following exchange: -> Friend: "Thanks, [Troper], for everything. You're a really good friend." -> This Troper: "What kind of person would I be if I ''wasn't'' there when someone needs a friend most?" * This troper has an interesting Nakama with no lack of romance. She would like to add she is a VERY protective older sister when it comes to her Nakama's happiness. * This troper and her four close friends. It helps to have people you can always count on, when you're in high school. * This Troper and her group of nine. When you have a high school as crazy as mine, it's good to have such great friends. * This Troper has close-knit groups of friends that, [[{{RagtagBunchOfMisfits}} despite the variation of personalities and backgrounds]], are fiercely loyal and help each other out in a pinch. They also repeatedly provide some... [[{{Understatement}} interesting topics of conversation]]. * This Troper's dorm has three pretty distinct Nakama. There's the Freshmen, the Insitgators (as our RA calls them), and the Loungers (the diversely nerdy group who hangs out in the lounge playing video games). We all intermingle a lot, but during meals, we generally split into these groups. ** This troper also has three personal Nakama. The aforementioned Loungers at college, his circle of friends online, and a rather large one that consists of all the teens and early-twenty-somethings at his home church. * This Troper has three Nakamas. His five man band from high school, his five geek band (his geeky friends with whom he plays videogames,

talks about animes and other geeky stuff) and his ever changing/growing friends from College/Law School (composed of a rather diverse group of people that constantly changes but having a core group of friends that form the Nakama) * This Troper has a nakama consisting of only three people: this troper, my cousin Casey, and my mentor/honorary brother (who is old enough to be my father). But try to seperate the three of us, and... * This Troper's nakama consists of eight guys, each individually associated with a Tarot card of the Major Arcana, a system brought in after this Troper had played FAR too much Persona. The eight of us are The Moon, The Fool, The Devil, The Hierophant, The Lovers, The World, The Chariot, and Justice. I've taken to calling us the 'Arcanakama'. * If [[{{Tropers/InsanityAddict}} this Troper]] had to pick out a 'core' group of friends, it would be the nine people he met over highschool. The first two dudes I met in the first year, essentially sticking together solely for being picked on by the resident troll, followed by three dudettes being added to the group for third year's grueling winter camp, followed by the rest as classmates when our classes got split during the fourth year. Even during college we still regularly meet and even went on vacation with everyone. They are, in order: a longhaired guy who is constantly crushed on by emodudettes, a relaxed slacker, a timid but incredibly sporty dudette, a workaholic with rich parents, a Cloudcuckoolander with a scary family, a tall, serious cynic who's her boyfriend, a mad rightwinger, a Spaniard and a loudmouthed metalhead. I'm the puerile hippy, although only they can call me that without inducing a rant. * [[{{Tropers/PentiumMMX2}} This troper's]] Nakama consists of 4 core members: Myself, my sister, my brother-in-law, and a good friend of ours. We try to hang out whenever possible; sometimes watching some anime or movies, and other times we do some multiplayer games (RockBand and [[MarioKart Mario Kart 64]] being among the most played). * This Troper has one, a group of us less popular people who are usually targets for the evil clique of girls. There are 10 of us, and a further 5 members on the edge of it. * [[{{Tropers/Luna87}} This troper]] had three throughout her teen years. The first was the smallest; I had two girlfriends when I was 13, and we were inseparable. The second was the drama club I joined as a senior. Even though I was never in a big play, they seemed to accept me and the other stage crew members as members of the "family," so to speak. The third was the LGBT/Straight alliance I joined my first year at university. * [[{{Tropers/Umbee}} I'm]] part of an online nakama known as the JHHQ. To be honest, I never expected it to happen. The only reason I joined the group in the first place is because one of my best friends was a member. Eventually though, I began to really care about them and nw consider them a second family. Several of us are tropers (which is almost entirely my doing), so maybe you'll se some more of us posting here eventually. * [[{{Tropers/Gendoikari1}} This troper's]] French class (7 people) is a Nakama of sorts. There's TheBigGuy, TheSmartGuy (me), GenkiGirl, GeniusDitz, MsFanservice, JerkWithAHeartOfGold and lastly TheChick.

* {{Tropers/Emolsifier}}: It's been nearly 4 years since I discovered the net. In that time I found met quite the spectrum of persons, but the one thing that strikes me is that I did meet those persons. I could've met anyone online but I met those guys. those guys that would ultimately become first my enemies, then my fans, then my friends, and then they became something I could never imagine. they became a force within my life that even now compels me to keep on with my life, even though I don't see or talk to them any longer. They are my Nakama and they give me my power of friendship. * This troper is part of a four person Nakama, which we call the Bro Commission: my best friend since 5th grade (TheBigGuy), a DeadpanSnarker (TheLancer), a nice girl whom we met last year (TheChick), and this troper (a Type 2 AntiHero, or so I like to think). We had a fifth member, but [[MoralEventHorizon recent events]] have removed him from the running. * {{Tropers/SunnyV}}'s {{nakama}} was composed of [[TsunDere herself]] (obviously), her [[TheDaria sister]], and [[GenkiGirl a girl she's been friends with since first grade]]. Then another girl moved in. She caused a brief rift, but soon joined our {{nakama}}. Soon she made a friend at school, who also joined. Now she's in something of a [[RomanticTwoGirlFriendship RTGF]] with my sister, her friend's the resident CloudCuckooLander, and the GenkiGirl's mellowed out a bit. Our personalities are so different that if we met now, we would probably not be friends. * This Troper is part of a huge Nakama at college that she credits with completely changing her life for the better. We eat lunch and dinner together, try to take classes together, try to think of who would be shipped with who if we were a work that had a fandom, support each other through everything (even setting up videochat at parties for one member of our group who had to go on leave for medical reasons), and give the most epic group hugs ever. * The sad thing about my Nakama is that I don't go to the same school as the rest of them. * This troper is fortunate enough to belong to two. The first one started back in sixth grade at church when I made friends with K1 because she was the only other person my age. Then she already knew S since second grade, and I made friends with K2 and K3 at middle school and high school respectively. Eventually, we became one big nakama, and it's safe to say that we really couldn't have gotten this far without each other. ** The second one is with our church's college and career group. There are about 10 regulars, and sometimes other people come and we fill them in on our inside jokes (like B's incurable botany and why people keep going "No doubt!" "Same doubt!" "Shawty!", primarily) and such and force them to watch Auto-Tune the News. We have amazing fun and great discussions and really gotten to know each other pretty well. Plus, where else are you going to find adults who all would really like to fill a pool with Lucky Charms marshmallows and milk? (And now that I've typed it...) * When [[{{Tropers/loracarol}} I]] first got into middle school, all my elementary friends all split up into the groups they "fit" withi.e. "Jock", "Prep", etc. However I was wierd, and had no group. One

day an old (like- ''preschool'' old) friend came up to me, and invited me into her {{Nakama}}. Erica, what you did means so much to me. You have no idea how much that helped me (and helps me). I love you so much, though, to be honest, I'm still trying to figure out if it's [[LesYay this]], [[LikeBrotherAndSister this]] or [[HeterosexualLifePartners this]] type of love. ^_~ * [[{{Tropers/TheUltimateFangirl}} This troper]] (henceforth I) grew up feeling lost and alone- I didn't think I'd ever really belong anywhere, let alone that I'd find a group of people with whom I really felt wanted. Now, I ''love'' to [[DancesAndBalls ballroom dance]]; it's one of my biggest passions. When a friend of mine invited me to Friday Night Waltz, a weekly ballroom dancing party in our area, I didn't know I'd find the best friends I will ever have in the process. Seriously, I have become so very close to my circle of friends from there, I consider them my family at heart. They know more about me than pretty much anyone else, and with them, I can truly [[BeYourself be myself]]. I know that [[ThePowerOfTrust we'd die for each other]], and I know we'll be there for each other [[HeterosexualLifePartners for the rest of our lives]]. I love you, Friday Night Waltzers! GroupHug!! * This troper frequents a forum that is the very DEFINITION of this. We've known each other for years, grown up together, have a list of injokes the size of my arm, and we're there for each other through thick and thin, despite all our stupid arguments and bickering. One big, happy (slightly incestuous) family! * This troper is autistic and made her first real friends in college. There were three of us as a core group, and half a dozen others who were nearly as close. All of us were odd in some way or another (my autism wasn't even unusual in that group)... one guy had cancer; one of the girls had cerebral palsy. More than one of us had been in a mental hospital. And I don't think that, in that school, there were people who were as close to each other as we were. We would probably have died for each other, and that's no exaggeration. One of the shyest of the group once stood up to the Dean of the college to get a class moved to a classroom in a building with an elevator, as our friend couldn't get up stairs thanks to the CP. Worked, too. * This troper's home room class (called TAGs) was this. We've gone through hell and back with the tragic loss of two class mates and our original [[TeamMom TAG Mommy]] moving away. And even dispite this, we're still really tight and really accepting: this troper, another class mate and our second TAG Mommy are all [[SixthRanger sixth rangers]] but we're considered full members of our TAG. TAG G For Life! * This Troper used to have a rather tightly-knit class for 3 years in Middle School. However, most of us went to different High Schools. Me and 2 of the others went to the same school and spent a lot of time together. Half way through the first year, however, we started drifting apart and, at this point, I haven't said 2 words to either of them in months. We were misfits at our old school, and that's what brought us together. Now, I am the only misfit that I know of, but I would really like to be part of a Nakama once again. * This troper's ordinary life nakamas have been too amorphous and

unstable to really earn the term for too long. Camp is a different story. At the nerd camp I attend, CTY, everybody feels some sense of nakama within the camp. It's happened to me every year, without fail. Three weeks in constant contact with each other forms nakamas out of necessity. My best example was when I took Fiction: Saratoga site, '08, session 1. Almost the entire class (all ten girls and two out of four boys) bonded so closely over the intense workshopping and mocking of romance novels and our nerdy senses of humor. We called ourselves the Fiction Force. I cried so hard when we had to leave, probably more than any other year. I still love them all, and if we had a reunion, we would probably fall back into place as if no time had passed. * This troper is a student at Rice University - pretty much the greatest place on Earth. All of your undergraduate experience tailors itself to the creation of nakamas - your college (JIBA!), your floor, your O-Week group, whatever. * This troper's nakama currently comprises four persons: herself, a girl she calls her little sister, a punk rock chick, and a male(?) she calls her big brother. This troper is more or less responsible for this, and though members are wary of each other at times, we are repeatedly reminded that, as twisted as we are, we're family. (It may help that we all have serious mental problems and understand what each other are going through, heh.) * This troper's group of friends invoked this by dubbing ourselves TEAM BACK (due to our chemistry teacher seating the seven of us at the back of the room). We made shirts. We helped each other catch up in class (all of us had severely messed up schedules). Thanks to my friend's genre savviness, it was even declared that intrateam relationships would be [[LikeBrotherandSister incestuous]]. ** Additionally, the orchestra at this troper's school is a big (albeit fractured) Nakama, thanks to the director, our own [[TeamMom Team Dad]]. * All of the tropers on ThisVeryWiki. Think about it: many of us spend more time on the wiki than we do with the people around us. We [[CrowningMomentOfFunny laugh]] together, we [[TearJerker cry ]] together, share our most [[FetishFuel intimate]] secrets wwith each other. We might not always get [[EditWar along]], but we ''will'' always stick together. Thank you, TVTropes. * This troper would travel to the ends of the Earth for her nerdy, good natured Nakama. Though they've only known each other for a year she is hard pressed to find a group she loves more. Opting to sing Wicked songs at the top of their lungs while biggest annual campus party is going on, dubbing our new dorm room the lair of "The Fresh Geeks of Bel-Air", ready to cheer you up when you're down, walking across campus at 2am to trade Pokemon... Yeah, I love my Nakama. * This lurker would like to talk about her own nakama. Whom she refers to as her pack--and who all also refer to it as such. In fact, I've had a 'pack' since Kindergarten but most of them left me and I have since then learned to seperate 'friends' and 'pack' and 'almost pack.' Well, there are four others in my pack. ** One I met at the age of two and we have still remained close. Another was met at three in ballet class (which both of us quit rather early). The third addition to my pack is a girl who started out rather

timid, with a soft voice, whom I met just two years ago (eight grade) and another I met this year in March over the Internet. I shall tell each of these stories because... I love them all so much. *** First one, we shall call her Panda. Why? Because she's our little teddy bear--but in black and white and a little sad. We shall all get her through her troubles and we all love her so much. Well, Panda and I, as mentioned above, met at the age of two. In Preschool. I can still very clearly remember our first meeting. I walked up to her (she was playing with some little animal figurines) and asked if I could play. She ignored me. I took the tiger outta her hands and we argued a bit before, after agreeing to letting her have the tiger, we sat down and played. And we did that every day I came to school. Now, thirteen years later, we're closer than most friends made in politer ways and wouldn't have it any other way. *** Second one... Well, she's gonna be called Bunny. Why? Well, because (though she's gonna kill me for this if she finds out I typed it) totally reminds me of a bunny. Actually, she also reminds me of a puppy. It all makes sense in my mind. Well, we met in ballet. We talked a bit but she really became my pack when, as we were doing the Animal Song, she came up to me. We're supposed to be lions, right? Well, she's standing up for one (which was wrong) and I looked up at her from my perch on the ground. She kinda made the rawr and then that was it. We lost each other after we quit dance but third grade came around and our friendship was revived. Along with getting her close to Panda! Twelve years later and she's the most social of us all--but she calls us her little dorks and will defend us from anyone who dares to insult us. Because she can call us weird and geeky but NO ONE (and I mean no one) else can mock us for it. *** Third one is another animal name. Wolfie. Though that's of her own choosing, of course. I'll call her that purely for convenience. Well, I first met her and she was shy and semi-friends with Bunny. I wasn't quite sure what prompted it but I wanted to get her to open up. Somehow (can't remember how) we switched home phone numbers and called it each other. Well, on one of these calls she was 'slaphappy' and goofy and she became pack. We're still close and I have since then given her Panda's email (they became pack) and got her closer to Bunny (they are now pack). *** If you can't tell, my pack also became each other's pack. I don't know if it was my influence but I do know that's how it goes. Right now, Ollie (Oh look! Not an animal name! It's because that's her beautiful nickname.) is only part of my pack--not theirs. I think Bunny might consider her pack as well and I know Panda considers her almost-pack. Since Wolfie is who introduced me to Ollie over the Internet I want to think she believes her to be almost-pack, but I'm not entirely sure. I don't know how she did it, but I've opened up to her more than any other person. At two in the morning, I've poured out my heart to her over the Internet--and she's accepted that. She knew about pack before she became it (while the others didn't) and when that little click happened, I told her. Now, I know you're the most likely to read this Ollie, and know that I love you. **** Really, if you can't tell, I love all my pack. They are the people I would shift from my comfort zone for, the people I would hurt

myself or others for. And this might not seem like much but I would brave the dark for them if I had to. And to let you know what I mean by that... I'm achluphobic and agliophobic. In other words, I am terrified of the dark and pain. They're the only people I would literally kill for. And even if we sometimes argue or don't understand each other or get annoyed with each other, that won't change one important fact: They are, and always will be, my nakama. * My entire highschool pretty much turned into one giant nakama that only grew larger through all of the hell we endured. To this day, get us together, and even if some of us haven't seen eachother for a while, it's like we were never apart. WHS? Utah? I love you guys. Thank you. * I've had two. The first involved me befriending a pair of sisters at a time in my life when I desperately needed friends. Both my mother and their father said it was like having extra kids, we were so close. And though I've never told them, meeting them when I did certainly saved some part of my sanity. I don't see them much anymore, but I just know, somehow, they'd have my back if I needed it, and I feel the same. The second is the group I fell in with at high school - though ironically, the girl who introduced me to the group fell out with most of it rather spectacularly at the end of senior year, but I'm still there. We were the 'outsiders clique', for lack of a better term, and as such are a rather wacky mix, but we work. * It was only this year that this troper finally learned what a true Nakama is. She joined her high school lacrosse team after an acquaintance told her she may like it. She had never played lacrosse or any other sport before for the matter and was horribly out of shape. She somehow managed to make it through the tryouts and actually make the team. During practices all the other members would stop whatever they were doing to come and help her improve. Even though she was always behind the rest of the team during running drills they'd slow down and run with her, even if it meant the whole team's time suffered just so she wouldn't be running down the road by herself. These are girls she had never talked to before and thought she had nothing in common with. They're not her friends. They are Nakama through and through though. She will never forget that feeling she had sitting on that field laughing the early summer days away. * I have one heck of a sweet Nakama; me, Dark, A-Cat, Mary, Helen, Bex, Lottie, Soph and Sarah. * [[{{Tropers/Meshakhad}} This troper]]'s brother was part of a supernakama in high school, that consisted primarily of his friends and most of their parents. All parents were called "Mom" or "Dad", and everyone was always welcome at everyone else's houses. * My Skype group consists of three fellow FanFiction.net authors. They started out being FOAF's, and are now more like my family. I thank God for them, because I wouldn't be typing this otherwise. Wouldn't BE anymore, otherwise. * I'm in a poetry club at my college where I's the only freshman and the upperclassmen. The upperclassmen seem like a Nakama to me as they are mostly English Majors which I want to change to(not because of them, but I want to focus on video game narrative and dialogue.) I mentioned that I was the [[FishOutOfWater fish out of water]] and got

kindly reminded by the senior whose [[TheHero the group's leader]] that I am not a fish out of water. I was immediately welcome the first day as if I was one of their own. I even got a hug from one of the club's members even though I've only seen her for three days as of this posting. * This troper's Star Wars RP group. We are one of the very few leadership groups that has not had internal conflict and disagreement, and considering the reputation of the RP site in general, that's quite an achievement. We are, most notably: a [[CrazyAwesome Crazy Awesome]] [[CloudCuckooLander CloudCuckooLander]] of a Jedi Battlemaster; an incredibly sweet, compassionate Jedi Healer; a white-haired Jedi Master whose first love is flying and tinkering with his ship; a selfdescribed "The Aragorn" of a Jedi Master with a talent for fleet battles; an intelligent, snarky but rather lazy Human Replica Droid; and a winged [[PintsizePowerhouse pint-sized powerhouse]] Jedi Master with two big cats as pets. In-character, we form the leadership core of a Jedi Academy. Out of character, we're all very close friends. * I met the group that would become the core of my WorldOfWarcraft friends in a low level guild. We were all pretty raid-minded and had similar griveances. None of us really had the heart to leave for another guild because we enjoyed each others' company. When ''Burning Crusade'' hit, we took the opportunity to find our own guild and added couple more friends into our core and becoming the second highest raiding guild in our server. We had friction but our officer channel often lacked drama because of how well we worked together. But the true Nakama moment came when one of us had to leave for the army. It would take a few months it became apparent that by the time he was done, we would be done with SSC/TK, meaning he would not be able to get the quest items for Hyjal and Black Temple and suffer from CantCatchUp. In his absence, we discussed how much it sucked that we would not have him and wondered what we could do. We suddenly realised one of us had his account details. We killed Kael and Vashj once more just for him. The best part was that we didn't tell him either. We just casually invited him to the Hyjal raid after he returned. His reaction when he realised it was a true CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming. * My nakama is made of Crazy Awesome. I'm the resident Cloudcucukoolander who takes Refuge In Audacity (and viewed as The Chick even though I'm a guy), another friend of mine is the resident Lovable Sex Maniac, Bunny Ears Lawyer and The Hero (though we all switch occasionally),the third Lancer to come along made us the Power Trio for a short while (and The Big Guy to boot) and the last main one in the core group, who likes to be considered a Guest Star Party Member (an awesome one). We continue to expand day by day. Even though we've split on some nasty terms at least once, and can't go one year without a The Reason You Suck Speech, the vitrolicism with which we speak to one another comes off as more Nakama than anything else. * My nakama....how can I say it, besides that they're the best people I've ever had in my life. Before I met them, I was convinced, firmly, that the world hated me, and that I was just going to live my life being used by others, then tossed aside. Then, when I was hanging out at, of all places, a pool hall at my college, watching a game of Wii Golf, this kid pulled off the weirdest/coolest thing I've ever seen in

that game. We started talking, he introduced me to his fiance, and we went ghost hunting a few times on our campus. Then, at some point, we became a nakama. We always like to think of ourselves as a pack, a team, and, above all, a family. Now, I've never had good relationships with my real family, and, at one point recently, I was talking about it with them, and one of them suggested that I save up some money for an apartment nearer to where they lived, so that I could be closer to my "real family". Probably the happiest [[CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming moment]] in my life. Within the group, I guess you could say I'm the Lancer, my friend who I met first is the one who takes Refuge in Audacity, and his fiance is both the Chick and the Heart, as well as the real leader. If you guys ever read this, I love ya both! Nauro pack forever! * This Troper has a possible subversion. She thought that she had a Nakama in her close friend of five years. Alas, she's just found out that said 'Nakama' thought that they were no such thing, and chose to break them up in what could have been the most painful way she could choose. Said troper is sure that she can form a Nakama relationship with another, eventually, but now it just hurts too much. * This Troper has a rather... interesting {{Nakama}}, to say the least. Nobody in it has met each other in real life, but nevertheless it remains the closest he's ever been with anyone in life. He met the first member of the {{Nakama}} (who will be referred to as B) online on Fanfiction.net, with the second, C, following shortly after, followed by D, E, F, and G (who came much later). Long story short, after a few months the entire thing turned into a LoveDodecahedron, with numerous sides getting ticked off at each other, and as of late D and G don't talk to E at all. When the term "LoveDodecahedron" is brought up, it gets really complicated, with every graph being nighincomprehensible despite there only being seven members. While the relationships are staggering in number, even this Troper's caught up in it, being deeply attracted to C. In fact, F is the only person who gets out of the dodecahedron completely unscathed. Though there's little end to drama, they still remain the best friends this Troper has ever had, even separated through hundreds of miles and a textbased format like the Internet. In fact, the {{Nakama}} was once so close that someone drew ''fanart'' of it. Lately it's... less so, but possibly recovering. Previously an IneffectualLoner, the group has done wonders for this Troper's attitude, mood, and outlook towards life, though he can't speak for anyone else. He thanks them all, and hopes he can continue contact with all of them in the years to come. They're like a second family to him. * This Troper considers his group of five friends at College to be his Nakama, they are all incredible friends and I honestly don't know what I'd do without them, and I've only known them for a few months. * [[{{Tropers/wyze2099}} I]] have a small but closely-knit nakama that formed from fellow Walmart coworkers. I met two of them as cartpushers; the three of us bonded on shared geekery and experiences working our butts off on a gigantic parking lot. Soon we began hanging out at each other's houses on our days off, which soon turned into weekly rotating get-togethers whenever the three of us were able to have the same evening off of work. At first our get-togethers

primarily involved video games. We still play video games together regularly (especially on XBox Live), but at some point I got the two of them introduced to tabletop roleplaying. That kind of gaming soon took over our get-togethers, and I brought a fourth member into the group after introducing him to tabletop {{RPG}}s. He's another coworker of mine, and he was even more of a social misfit that the rest of us. I could see that he was starving for friendship, so I befriended him and brought him into the nakama. Our gaming sessions continue to this day (schedule permitting); there's always one of us GMing a game whenever we get together. I consider those three my "brothers from other mothers". * This Troper has a couple of Nakama: one from back home made up of friends from his church, and the squad in the ROTC battalion he is a part of in college. The former I have known for several years, and have shared many laughs and video-game related conversations. The latter doesn't have much in the way of nerdiness, and we haven't known each other for long. However, due to the the strenuous PT together in the morning, the classes together, the shared career goal, and the general affability of everyone in my squad, we get along great. Any one of us could count on another cadet for most anything. * [[{{FairyDreamer}} This troper's]] Nakama is made up of her and four other girls. We have a {{jerk with a heart of gold}}, a {{genius ditz}}, a {{tomboy}}, a {{brainy brunette}} and this troper is a {{friend to all living things}}. * My Nakama consists of my best friend since elementary school (who, depending on the situation is either considered a sister, mother, or evil mentor), and a boy we met in high school and consider a brother. We're all going to different colleges now, but we're still as close as we always were. * [[@/{{Pastylover2}} This troper]] had his high school drama class and his group of [[RagtagBunchOfMisfits four crazy friends]] * [[Tropers/{{Trkzsoup}} This troper]]'s drama troupe one year. Since we had a new director and a smaller cast, we all became ridiculously close over the year we were doing shows together. We were described by ourselves and outsiders as a family, with our director still going by 'Momma' to this very day. * [[Tropers/{{Sabel}} This Troper]] has an online Nakama made of around eight people (but it varies), two of which are dating and the rest of which fawn over them for being the babies of the group. At one point we went so far as to assign family roles to everyone, some of which we still claim as valid (mostly just with my having adopted one of them as my little brother, and of course our resident MamaBear). We're seriously considering trying to score a huge house to bunk together in someday. * Within the chatplay of a certain private KingdomHearts roleplay forum, dainty and 'emotional' young memory witch Namin has collected a strange group and turned them all into a close circle: there's Lea, the eleven-year-old pyromaniac in training; [[FinalFantasyXIII Snow]], the self-proclaimed 'hero' and sometimes comes off as borderline childish; Myde, the wandering musician and official NiceGuy; Ienzo, the child prodigy who [[BreakTheCutie comes pre-broken]]; Lightning, the brave and outgoing TeamMom; and finally Namin, of course, the

force of pure niceness that brought them all together in the first place. ** The roleplayers themselves, too, are a big ol' Nakama. * My {{Nakama}}... Actually, I have more then one. People who I've met through school, camp... internet. We stick together... until the end. Afterward we move on, split up... but we never drift away. Middle and High school are a big cesspool of people, drifting together at varying intervals. That's where my {{Nakama}} meets again... maybe. I don't care if I don't see them again. I saw them once, we stuck together... that's life. Nothing will stay the same forever. A {{Nakama}} doesn't have to be for life. It just has to be now. None of us ever "backstab" or "betray" each other. Those people may have been my friends, but they weren't my {{Nakama}}. My friends stick with each other. We are one. United... until the end. ** That brought tears to my eyes. It's incredibly true. There are many individuals and groups of individuals whom I've formed brief, close friendships with for periods as short as a day... and then have never seen again. * This troper isn't sure how she got one, (time, maybe), but her nakama is the only thing she has in her life to rely on. Hell, we even had a team pet, which was my dog. [[spoiler:Emphasis on "was," however.]] Regardless, we are absolutely positively and without question family, and this troper would do damn near anything for them. * [[Tropers/{{Ventisia}} This Troper's]] Nakama are like family. We bicker like family to boot, but we always make up in the end. Some of us even get so close that we're comfortable doing things physically (no nudity, though...) that most would consider close to "Friends with Benefits," but we all know that nothing such is meant by it. Close friends, brothers and sisters of friends (who have in turn become close friends, age regardless), all practically an extended family. The mother of about three of our group has become a mother to us all; many of us even call her "Mom." We've been friends for varying lengths of time, some going back for five years or more... but all of us stick together. * This troper has a group of Nakama. We are all very close, even though we are getting new members, certain have left. It's a constantly changing thing, but at its core are the central three members, one of which is This Troper called the Broforce. * For this Troper, it's the Nintendo forum she goes to. We're all friends there, and it's filled with great people. * This troper has plenty of friends, but only two who she would absolutely consider Nakama. One is a girl she has known since the age of five, who really is like a sister - We may not always talk as much as I do with some other friends, but that's because we're already so close, which reminds me a lot of the way siblings interact. The other is a girl who she has known for a long time, but only really befriended about a year ago after talking to her occasionally for years and slowly noticing how strangely alike we are in certain ways. This girl is a CloudCuckooLander, an IllGirl, and TheKlutz, so this troper often serves as CloudCuckooLandersMinder. Other friends have potential, but most of them I've only known since starting high school a few months ago, so I wouldn't call them Nakama right now.

* This troper's drama club. Obviously people came and went with graduations from middle school and high school, but you could tell who truly "belonged" as soon as they joined; there's something about them, but they always meshed with the club and members better than anyone else. One of the drama teachers fostered this in her very New Agey emotional exercises during the few Shakespeare plays, and it worked. Not everyone was liked by everyone else, but everyone knew each other better than anyone else. * This troper is not very sociable. However, she and the few friends she has make quite a nice {{Nakama}}. Ours consists of a {{Tsundere}}, a {{Kuudere}}, a potential {{Yangire}} and...someone whom I cant seem to describe. Lets say JerkWithAHeartOfGold. * This Troper used to think she had a {{Nakama}}, but it fell apart when she went to college - she got into a fight with one of them, and lost touch with the others, and now finds herself somewhat alone at college. [[{{Determinator}} But she's bound and determined]] [[SetRightWhatOnceWentWrong to fix that.]] She's already trying to get in touch with and apologize to her old friends, and has already made one good friend here (and between my directing/screenwriting aspirations and her art directing aspirations, we've got ourselves the seeds of a ProductionPosse to boot :) ) and is working on making more. [[EarnYourHappyEnding It'll be tough but...I think I can do it.]] * This troper and her circle of friends. We're all a bunch of misfit anime fans. We've shared some pretty big secrets, akward moments, and stupid ideas on what to do when the pizza delivery guy gets here. Every time one of us watches a new series, we decide who is which character. I've told them the true subject of the book I'm writing (My parents don't even know). We can give honest opinions and constructive criticisms (whereas most teenagers, especially girls, can't trust complements from friends). I could go on for hours... Love you guys! * This troper is a special case, Much like KingdomHearts Most of my Nakama Form core trios, Whenever those trios form, They are the best friends anyone can ask for. * My Nakama has grown slowly over the years. It started out with one girl, who I've known since the diaper days. We stuck together, and in 2nd grade, we gained 2 more girls to the party. The first girl and I were like sisters by then. In middle school, we gained 3 more, and that became our little family. Everybody knew us as "the little group" of girls in the class. There's been ups and downs, but through it all, we've stayed together. I hope we can stay together until the Universe explodes [[BuffySpeak or something.]] * This troper had a Nakama that seemed unbreakable during middle school, but the minute everyone went to different schools (and even the ''same'' schools) it broke. Only a few original members of this troper's Nakama are a part of her current Nakama, and this troper would go to the ends of the earth for all of them. * I have a one-woman Nakama-- my best friend. We're close as sisters, and we love each other and hate each other's guts at the same time. * [[Tropers/ElodieHiras I]] have found a Nakama: my current RPG group. When my mother rejected me, my brother and cousin betrayed me, they took me with them, and gave me a few presents for my birthday (including a little ring made of plastic beads and nylon thread that

the only girl in the group made herself and which she designed completely from scratch by herself, that I can carry at all time and look at anytime to remind me that [[YouAreNotAlone I am not alone anymore]]), saving my life (without them, I would have already commited several more suicide attemps, perhaps the one that would work this time), and giving me a purpose in my life. [[HeartwarmingMoment I thank these guys and that one gal, from the bottom of my heart, for what they done for me.]] * [[Tropers/{{Vilui}} This troper]] has a Nakama consisting of himself and two online friends. The other two first met each other face-toface (though they now live apart) but I've not met either of them face-to-face yet. Nevertheless, we've been a friendship group for six years now and have very strong bonds; we've shared some of our deepest secrets with each other and they are among the first people I'd go to for advice (and the very first, if it's writing advice). Here's one HeartwarmingMoment that stands out (not exact words): --> A: How do I know whether what I feel for D [person outside the group] is real love or not? --> B: Well, put it this way. If she and your best friend were both dying and you could only save one of them, which would it be? --> A: Er... you do realise ''you'' are my best friend, don't you? * Small high school/college debate teams fall into this. A bunch of kids who aren't afraid to yell to get their points across? Utter chaos. But, hey! That's nakama. * This tropette has what she refers to as her 'skating family'. We're about 25 complete strangers who bond together and only know each other via skating. We act like sisters, argue occasionally, have 'friendly rivalries'. My coach has also stood in as my 'substitute mommy' when my actual mom wasn't there to help me get on a bunch of [[ItMakesSenseInContext Christmas lights for a dress rehearsal.]] We're a giant family, and that's not gonna change. * My summer soccer team is this. We only got together this year, from three different grades and four different schools (not to mention three or four different teams last year), but it's definitely the closest team I've ever been on. * The forum I go on has everyone as one BIG nakama. It used to be a regular forum, but over the years some members left and the ones that stayed have been ingrained into our group, a member of this big dysfunctional family forever. And while most of us drive each other up the wall nearly all the time, and people split off into their own smaller groups with one another (still on the forum, though), AND real life/outside friends means we cannot always put the forum first, we talk every night, share many personal things and are all included in our own quirky little way. I love you, JJHF! Here's hoping that road trip one day becomes a reality! * What happens when you get a bunch of jerkass geeks, a university, a Commuter's Lounge, and an anime club. You get Edgy's Nakama. Together, they trolled Scientology, the few building managers, their worst enemies, smokers, canidates for student council, and each other. They've had epic parties. Edgy Rick Roll'd them all at his wedding, did the Time Warp (Again), and sang Space Oddity. * BasketCase has been part of two- one in secondary school, which has

since sadly drifted apart due to graduation and people going to different colleges around Ireland. The other, a much smaller group, consists of four or five drama students with waaaaay too much energy and a shared twisted sense of humour. The highlight of the latter is the fact that, when I and one of our slightly more emotionally fragile members were left up in Dublin in the summer with work, EVERYONE ELSE told me to "mind her". * Finally found mine when I moved schools to start sixth form. They've made me so much happier and more confident. I didn't actually believe people could have {{Nakama}} in real life until I met them! * There is a group of seven people, myself included, who have formed a nakama together over the internet. We are separated by distance, time, and borders. However, the seven of us have stood by each other in all moments of duress and we have defended each other from outsiders who dislike us. The seven of us have worked together on a website as staff members for some time. We trust each other, and we stand by each other. In my recent time of need, I have been so very grateful for their companionship. ---[[CowboyBebop I think's it's time we blow this scene. Get everybody and the stuff together]] and go back to {{Nakama}}. [[CrowningMusicOfAwesome Three, two, one let's jam!]] ----

NakedApron ---* This troper is planning on doing this a lot on her (distant-future) honeymoon. * A friend of this troper did some art of an original character like this in this attire. Given that said character was a male ''zombie'' with ''half his face missing'', it wasn't very flattering. * This troper used to work for a certain coffee chain with a mermaid logo. One day she and a friend were poking around an adult toy store and having a giggle at the costumes when her friend said, "Hey, this is perfect for you!" and whipped off the rack a green apron bearing the words: "Caution, contents extremely hot!" The revelation that apparently there are enough people out there who fetishize baristas to generate demand for this product was one she really could have done without. ----

NakedFirstImpression Remember how your parents always said that meeting new people is fun? And it was, too, right up to the point where you met someone in a birthday suit. ---* Genderflipped with this troper. I was at a friend's party and after a round of Truth or Dare, got roped into stripping for her. During said event some friends of hers arrived, so I made quick with the finish. As she went out to greet them, I gathered my garments and was

just putting them on when the door opened and one of the new arrivals peeked in. I kicked her out in an instant. Admittedly I wasn't completely naked at the time, but it still fits the trope. ** Update: We're together now. Have been for 3 months (at the time of writing, mind ye). Guess she liked what she saw. * This troper's [[RefugeInAudacity complete lack of fear]] or anything resembling [[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} social hangups]] once led to a NakedFirstImpression getting him laid. Embarrassment is a weakness. ** That, sir, is fuckin' awesome. ** Pics or it didn't happen. ** You could at ''least'' give us the details. ** We really wanna hear it. * This troper lives in a coed dorm. After a few weeks he went to go to the showers (which for some reason don't have doors) and there was no water running. He asked "Anyone in here?" and no one replied. He opened the curtain to find a very hot girl toweling off her hair (which had probably blocked her ears) this troper shut the curtain before she took the towel away from her eyes and backed away. Still hot full frontal unknowing nudity. ** Your showers didn't have locking doors? *** Well out of 9 showers only one has a door and that one is a handicapped stall, the rest get a curtain. Colleges are cheap but they cost alot. * One of my roommates at her boyfriend over. I step out of the showers...thankfully I had a towel on, so maybe it doesn't quite count. Strangely enough, despite the fact that this had never happened before, we all managed to stay calm (no shrieking) and he stepped outside long enough for me to change. * When This Troper was 6, she went to her friend Brittany's for the first time. Being the curious bugger I was, I explored every room and door I thought was safe to. I opened one door and accidentally walked in on her friend's older brother getting out of the bath tub. My reaction was pretty much an "Eep! O-O" and slamming the door. I never touched the bathroom door again at her house xD * Yes, it happens. This troper met a young married couple at a party who said this happened to them. * ThisTroper decided to take advantage of having the just-on-the-edgeof-the-woods house to herself and go skinny-dipping in her (very private, fenced in) swimming pool; just as I was getting out, the neighbors came by to also use the pool after getting permission from the rest of the family. They brought their thirteen year old son in order to introduce him when everyone came back... it was terribly awkward and I still can't look at that kid in the face. * half-naked is more like it for me, when someone comes over i'm usually shirtless. * This troper has been a member of a nudist club her entire life. She has the continual experience of not recognizing family friends because they're ''wearing'' clothes. ** [[FemaleGaze What...what are you looking at then?]] * This Troper would like to call himself a teen actor. I am not a big star(not even a small one...), but I do play in the occasional extremely obscure zero budget film. So, there was this one where I

acted next to another girl. Since this was, as I have already mentioned, a very, very low budget production, all actors had to use only one room to change their cloths in(it was a historical movie, so lot's of cumbersome, ridiculous cloths from the late 19th century). My first impression of my co-star for the film was accidentally seeing her pretty much completely naked. By mistake, I swear. [[AllMenArePerverts Not that I regret anything, of course]]. * When I was [[HoYay sleeping over at a friend's]], his younger sister caught me changing. That led to an explanation of why I was, ah...different. * On a first visit to a female friend's house, she answered the door in her paper-thin nightgown (afternoon nap)...wearing nothing underneath because the temperatures were in the triple digits. After a round of blushes and giggles for everyone involved, we had a pleasant visit. I'm proud to say I looked her in the eyes the entire time. * In a borderline example, one time I met a person at my friend's birthday party and one of the first things he did was pull his pants down and show everyone his ass (though, [[DistractedByTheSexy for some reason,]] I don't remember why). [[CovertPervert Secretly, I actually enjoyed it,]] and lucky me, he flashed me and the birthday boy one more time before that day was over. ---EEK! Go back to NakedFirstImpression while I get dressed and forget this ever happened! ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NakedPeopleTrappedOutside * My friend had just taken a shower and was alone in the house, so she didn't bother to put anything on when she went to the kitchen. She noticed the dogs needed more food, stepped into the garage to get it, and the door locked behind her. There were some wetsuits in there, but this is Arizona, it'd be more sane to running around a suburban neighborhood nude. She ended up crawling through the attic, hopping from rafter to rafter. * [[SovietKitty This troper]] once had to evacuate a hotel, just as she had started drying off from having just come back from the pool. She had to stand outside for half an hour in nothing but a towel. ** Similar thing happened to my college roommate. Fire alarm went off while he was in the shower and he ran outside in a towel (because he thought it was a real alarm) only to find that it was a drill. *** Similar story for [[{{Chabal 2}} This troper}}]]: they tested the fire alarm at random times to make sure it was working, including one time at 3 AM, and one in the morning and evening when people were still showering. * This troper's brother said once that he was sick of living in our house. My dad then put him outside while it was snowing for a few hours in nothing but his underwear. This troper also once became trapped outside while getting something out of a car that he left inside it the previous night. The door had been locked and he had become trapped outside. He had to ring the doorbell (even though his

brother was in the den that was really close to the door but apparently could not hear the door banging.) ** And he didn't get hypothermia? That must be an exaggeration. He'd be dead in thirty minutes. *** Five minutes in sub-freezing temperatures is all that's really needed to change most peoples mind. * In this troper's co-ed dorm, pranks were very common. One of the most memorable was a girl whose clothes were stolen by her roommates while she was in the shower. Fortunately, they were kind enough to leave her a towel. Unfortunately, they left her a hand towel, forcing her to choose between covering her breasts or her genitals because it wasn't big enough to cover both. Her solution? She covered her head! I guess you're not really naked if no one knows your identity. Fortunately all of the rooms had combination locks, otherwise she'd have really been up the creek. * While [[DoctorWorm this troper]] was in high school, he attended a summer camp held at a college. One day, a fire alarm went off in the late afternoon, so the building of course had to be emptied. About a dozen people were apparently showering at the time, and as such were stuck outside, wearing only a towel, in a crowd of over a hundred, for nearly an hour. ** Oddly enough, this troper also noticed that at least 5 girls he knew lived on the same floor were in this state, but the floor's bathroom had only three showers. Draw your own conclusions. * My roommate never brings his key when he goes to take a shower, only a towel and underwear, and we keep our door locked. As a result, I'm often forced to wait in the dorm to let him in. Well guess what roomie, I'm not waiting around anymore... *evil grin* * I had the dorm-door-locks-behind-you version: it was after midnight, I was in a thin bathrobe. Fortunately one of my hallmates was kind enough to go get an RA. A male RA. ** My dorm also had a bit of an outside fire-alarm-induced oneo'clock-in-the morning pajama party. ** Happened to a friend of this troper... while a guided tour was coming down the hall. * This troper once found a neighbor on his floor wearing a towel, who explained that his roommate had left and locked the door while he was showering, and that he didn't have his key with him. I went to notify said roommate in his stead, so no harm done. I considered saying something like "[neighbor] isn't happy that you left him so soon. He's all hot and wet and unclothed," but I couldn't figure out the wording to my satisfaction before I reached him. * The fastest way to get yourself back into your dorm room at this troper's school is to fake one of these; swap clothes for a towel in a friend's room, then call campus police to unlock your door. (If you're clothed and otherwise equipped to go outside during the day, you're supposed to go to the card office instead.) * The smoke alarm in my dorm hall was malfunctioning for about a month before they finally got it fixed. It went off six or seven times in that month, usually in the evening or early night. Each and every time we all had to evacuate just in case this time it was for real. In a dorm hall of 150 girls, there were always at least two of them

dripping wet and wrapped in towels. My favorite, though, was the girl who was completely dry, barefoot and clutching a bathrobe closed, standing next to the only guy in the crowd who was also dry, barefoot and wearing a towel. * This troper's former dorm-mate and several of his friends attempted streaking during one quarter's finals week. The plan was to streak through the campus library to disrupt the other students, and that part worked wonderfully. Unfortunately, they didn't quite think through how to get back to their clothes after they'd done that, so they had to cross the whole campus butt-naked in order to get back to the dorms. Somehow, they managed to come up with this half-plan while ''not'' drunk or stoned out of their minds. * This Troper's friend did this while sleepwalking in a hotel * This Troper was locked out of her dorm room in nothing but a towel after her roommate left and (admittedly wisely) locked the door while she was showering. And of course said roommate was in class for the next couple hours. * This troper knows people who will invoke this trope deliberately if locked out of their room by trading their clothes for a hallmate's towel before calling housing services; during daytime hours, if you've been locked out of your room, you're supposed to go to the housing services office. The only way to get help to come to you is to be unable to leave the building.... * This troper has never had it happen to him before, but I've done it to my friends several times. Once, while playing truth or dare with my cousins and their friends, I dared two brothers to run three laps around the yard in nothing but tennis shoes. They complied, and I quickly made everyone else lock all of the doors and windows. Another time, I made my best friend strip naked because he disobeyed my orders(we were starting a cult, and this was a type of punishment ritual). I decided that wasn't humiliating enough, so I threw his clothes into the yard and made him walk out there in broad daylight(a pretty day, lots of neighbors outside) to get them. Then I locked the door. To add insult to injury, my sister thought he was trying to rape her. He wasn't allowed back over for a while. ** I seriously hope you're kidding. Not only is that just mean spirited, but you could ruin someone's life like that if someone presses sexual harassment charges. * Apparently, one time, many years ago, when my dad was at a hotel, the fire alarm went off in the middle of the night. He instantly ran out, and the door slammed shut behind him. Only thing is.. he was sleeping without any clothes on, and couldn't go back in... let's just say it was quite awkward for him to explain himself. * At my home, it used to be that the handles could be locked, but only on the outside so it's possible to lock yourself out. One time, I was only in boxer shorts when it happened. * This troper observed one unfortunate girl trapped outside our dorm and wearing nothing but a bathrobe, not because of a lost key, but because of an ill-timed fire alarm, when ''everyone'' was stuck outside. Did I mention it was late evening and drizzling? ---Go back to NakedPeopleTrappedOutside, before somebody sees you!

----

NamedLikeMyName Share a name? Know someone who does? Tell us about it! ---* This Troper always had trouble with people misspelling his (relatively unusual and ambiguous) first name until it became a popular brand of computer. Now he just says, "...like the computer." ** This troper is dying to know what your name is. ** Is your name Mac? ** Either that or his parents were cruel enough to name him Apple... ** My guess would be Dell. * [[@/HersheleOstropoler This troper]] once simultaneously worked with Mr Starling "like the bird," Ms Ford "like the car," and Pat Riley "like the [then] [[{{Basketball}} Knicks]] coach." * This troper's father studied the legends of King Arthur when he was in college, and he took a liking to a name he read about. He liked it so much that he named his first daughter after it. It's a nice name...or it was, until Toyota released the Avalon car...Cue years and years of people asking me if I was named after the car, or the place of my conception. * [[@/{{Kriegsmesser}} This troper]] has the same name as the author of Catch-22. [[NeverHeardThatOneBefore Everyone loves to point it out.]] ** [[@/QuantumToast I]] [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Gemmell know the feeling]]. ** Don't be so sad. I'd kill to be surrounded by so many intellectual people that know relatively obscure things like that. * Yale, like the school. This is definitely a BerserkButton when people ask if I go there/ try to pronounce it in a way that doesn't sound like the school. * This Troper knows someone who books taxis under the name "Riley. As in Life Of." * This troper, named Audrey, uses "as in Hepburn" when telling people how to spell her name. * This troper's job involves talking on the phone a lot. With an unusual (for here) name of Karsten, most people come up with some way to mishear it - Carson, Parson and Clarkston being the most common [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karsten_Solheim unless they play golf]]. * This Troper is really lucky to have the same name as a Norse god. It makes it possible for him to say [[Main/IAlwaysWantedToSayThat "Like the god."]] ** I'm totally naming my kid Thor or Odin. *** Make sure he carries an ID. The substitutes never believe my brother isn't trying to pull their legs. **** My name is [[NorseMythology Odin!]] Strangely though, everyone always believes me for some reason, maybe its because my [+very+] odd last name, Lamph. I kid you not. Also my dogs name is Thor! * This troper really wishes her surname was shared with anyone famous. And then again, wishes it didn't sound like a term for the human hind-

quarters. (However, for my first if I'm feeling cheeky I can always use "As in 'Hail'." My first name's Mary.) * This troper went to fifth grade with a kid named Michael Jackson (he went by "Mickey" and he was black), and my sister goes to school with a Mykal Moore (pronounced like "Michael"). I have a relative whose first and middle names are Peter Gabriel, like the singer and two characters from ''Series/{{Heroes}}''; a second cousin named Grace Kelly, like the late actress/Princess of Monaco; and I went to high school with a kid whose last name was Newman and had an older brother named Paul. * "Gore." "How d'you spell that?" How do you ''think'' you spell that? This troper wishes he'd won just so he could have said "like the President" for a while. Then again, he also knows a girl named Hilary (one L) who's very glad Mrs. Clinton ''wasn't'' more successful. ** This troper's mother's second last name is Quezada (with Z), after Vicente Fox Quesada (with S) won the the mexican presidential election, everybody started mispelling her 2nd last name. ** "Gore. Like blood and gore." * [[{{Tropers/Delpolo}} This troper]] shares a first name with a British king, a famous detective story writer and a kid's show's main character, while his middle name is like three Belgian kings and a musician. As a joke, he would also mentions his last name, which is "like his father's"... if anyone actually bugged him about his name. ** Arthur Leopold *insert surname here*? * This troper is frequently subject to people switching around her first and last name because they assume she was named after [[{{GoneWithTheWind}} Rhett Butler]] despite being female, and no, her first name is not Butler. It can, however, be easily construed as a last name. * Some years ago, this troper came across the blog of a woman who posted pictures of her son, named Rayden. I wonder if he ever has to go "yes, like the Mortal Kombat character"... ** I thought it was "Raiden". *** It's "Raiden" in the arcade version and "Rayden" in the console versions. IMDB says it was to avoid confusion with the [[ShootEmUps shmup]] of the same name. ** This troper's name is Reidan, pronouced the same, and she (yes, she, it's Norweigan, dmamit) does say "yes, like Mortal Kombat" ALL THE TIME. *** [[TemptingFate Have you]] [[MetalGearSolid managed to avoid drowning?]] * This troper's given name isn't particularly subject to misunderstandings. His surname, however, has been misspelled on occasion. He should have thought to say "same as [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Farrah_Fawcett Farrah]]", given that it has heretofore been a source of NeverHeardThatOneBefore. * This troper's sister had a Harry Potter in her class at school (named before the first book was released.) He was later interviewed on a national TV breakfast show along with several other Harry Potters from around the country. ** Ooh, at my school we had a Harrison James Potter. Guess what he dressed up as for almost every Halloween.

* This troper frequently makes fun of LargeHam voice actors, including but not limited to Dan Green. He once quoted YuGiOhTheAbridgedSeries by shouting "I can do whatever I want, because I'm voiced by Dan Green!" His friend responded by saying "Um... Don't you mean Greening?" I honestly hadn't even noticed until then. * This troper's first name is the same as a very famous movie starring an eponymous borderline retarded main character. * This troper has a choice between "like Groucho" and "like Karl." The second one nets all sorts of "Communist!" jokes. * This troper worked at a camp where every counselor goes by a nickname. The troper picked the name Moony for ease of use, since it was just [[MyNaymeIs a different spelling]] of her last name. However, no one knew that, because when asked why, she'd answer: [[HarryPotter "You know, like Lupin's nickname."]] * This troper, who frequently finds herself having to spell it for people, has given her last name as "Bruce. As in ''BruceAlmighty''." (Her first name is Hilary. Going "as in Clinton", while tempting, would actually be misleading, what with the different spelling.) * This troper shares his name with a deceased celebrity. It is always spelt with a C, unless they like grunge. * This troper has the exact same first, middle, and last name as some guy famous for translating the bible. He has had stints as the secretary, vice president, acting president, and is currently the treasurer of his university's atheist society. * [[@/OmegaMetroid This troper]]'s middle name is Clint... yes, THAT Clint. Fortunately, my surname's not Eastwood, and my first name's normal. * [[@/{{this-guy}} Daniel, meaning "God is my judge" and like the guy who's apparently from the bible, Christopher, meaning Christ bearer, Diodati, meaning God-given and like the guy who translated the bible into Italian.]] [[{{Irony}} Atheist.]] * To keep people from calling her Haley or Ally, this troper will introduce herself as, "Hallie. Like Halle Berry, except white. And there's an I before the E." ** This fellow Hallie can identify, and usually gives people the Halle Berry example. Yet I've adjusted to respond to Haley, Holly, and Ally automatically. * This (female) troper's last name is spelled and pronounced exactly like the name of a (male) superhero cartoon character. I really wish my parents had named me "Terri". Take a guess. * This Troper once had to take down the name of a Lee Simpson. "As in Bart?" "Yeah, thanks for not saying Homer." ** You should of said "Like [[IncrediblyLamePun Lisa?]]" ** This Troper rejoices in the name of Matt Simpson, and had a lucky escape when Matt Groening decided to make the name of the character based on himself "Bart" when the rest of the Simpsons are named after his own family. Especially since he has blond hair and was at school when The Simpsons first became popular here. He does, however, still give his name out over the phone as "Simpson; as in the cartoon", especially when speaking to foreigners. * This troper's family has a rather unusual last name, "Waag." None of us had ever really expected to run into anyone with the same last name

until we ran into a weird string of shared names. Like [[http://www.waag.com a company]] that manufactures auto parts (they make shirts that family members occasionally wear). Or a family with the last name "Waage," three of whom shared first names with members of this troper's family. An internet search revealed: A) there's a man in Ohio who shares a first name, last name, and middle initial with this troper, and B) That there is (Or at least was; I don't know if it's still up) a blog doing a census of people with the last name Waag. * This troper subverts the trope. My last name was uncommon in TheOldCountry, and was mangled into a unique new one when my grandfather immigrated. There is no other person on the planet with the same first and last name as me. However, since people don't know how to pronounce or spell the name, they are constantly getting me mixed up with people whose names are only vaguely similar. * This troper is almost always asked "Do you hunt?" whenever he tells someone his name. * Not me, but this Troper had a teacher named Ian [=McShane=]. * The English pronunciation of this tropers name is identical to the english pronunciations of Kira ( from DN). Its becoming common for me to say yes like in deathnote, no I'm not making it up I promise. * My last name is Wolf. You have no idea how many people want to add extra e's and f's, so my family always has to say, "like the animal." My name is unusual and gets mutilated as well, but there's no one famous for me to refer to. ** [[VirginiaWoolf What about extra o's?]] * This troper went to camp with an Adam Sandler and has a Kevin Smith for a teacher. What really makes the last one funny is that he teaches at a film school... * This troper's name is Alastair, and he has DeadpanSnarker tendencies. Imagine his surprise upon playing [[DragonAge Dragon Age: Origins]]. Searching for Dragon Age: Origins fanart on DeviantArt is just plain ''creepy'' for him. ** Ooh, like [[HarryPotter Moody?]] Only not quite? *** Not at all, unfortunately. The two names have entirely distinct origins and meanings; Alastair is Scottish, Alastor Greek. * This troper doesn't really have this problem, except for people that, upon learning my name, ask if I hunt. Except for bugs, I don't believe I've ever killed anything in my life. So I have no desire to hunt, nor any inclination to. * Not [[@/MmmKay my name]], but I was watching the credits at the start of an episode of FamilyMatters when the name of ''John Tracy'' popped up. Naturally, being a {{Thunderbirds}} fan, I almost {{Squee}}'d. * This editor had a classmate named Robin Williams back in middle school; this caused one of the teachers to ask if he gets teased for that name. * This troper recently discovered an actual [[TheBigBangTheory Dr. Sheldon Cooper]] [[http://www.healthgrades.com/directory_search/physician/profiles/drmd-reports/Dr-Sheldon-Cooper-MD-C3E21270.cfm in Burlington, Vermont.]] He's an MD, however (rheumatology). Still, this troper can only

imagine what the guy puts up with these days. * To point out this trope to [[@/ToddTheT1000 this troper]] is to [[BerserkButton invoke the wrath of Sithis]]. Once, in America, he actually had the following conversation in a taxi: -->'''Cabbie''': So what's yo' name, fella? -->'''Me''': Ash. -->'''Cabbie''': Ohh! Like the poke-->'''Me''': No. Nothing at all like that. It's short for Ashley. -->'''Cabbie''': Ashley. Isn't that a gi-->'''Me''': Not where I'm from. The rest of the journey was sat in awkward silence. I hope the cabbie didn't expect a tip, because he sure as hell didn't get one. ** Too bad the cabbie didn't make a [[EvilDead slightly more flattering comparison]]. * This Troper knows a Michael Bolton. Apparently, he'd never heard of the ''other'' Michael Bolton until said Troper pointed it out after learning of him from TVTropes. ** Also said Troper shares a name with a not-particularly-famous country singer. * This troper's surname is Amore. When I spell it for people, they ask how to pronounce it. "The same way Dean Martin did." * John Carter. [[{{ER}} No.]] [[JohnCarterOfMars No.]] * [[@/{{Turtleducks}} This troper]] shares her last name with Clay Aiken, but no one ever remarks on that. Instead, they ''always'' spell her last name like that of Lord Beaverbrook, Max [[SpellMyNameWithAnS Ai]]''[[SpellMyNameWithAnS t]]''[[SpellMyNameWithAnS ken]]. * This troper has a classmate named Katie Perry, not even joking. Her other classmates never hesitate to tease the poor girl about it. * This female troper tends to introduce herself as "Levi, like the jeans." * One of my classmates thought he was hilarious when he pointed out a picture of MeganFox and said, "She has the same name as you!" I wasn't amused. * My last name is the same as that of a medical supplies company, and, with a different spelling, is the name of a castle in England. My full first name is not particularly common in my age group, but since my nickname is Kate... I had whiplash in high school. * In a relatively small news story, a man was kicked out of a casino because he had a terrible odor. Unfortunately, he happened to share names with me. * Me and my dad once asked a lady with the last name [[StarTrek Spock]] if she gets picked on a lot. * I went to high school with a [[DavidWeber David Webber]] and a [[DistrictNine Christopher Johnson]]. * I met a girl with the name Carmen. She introduced herself as "like Carmen Miranda". I mentioned Carmen Sandiego, which she quickly decided she liked better. This troper herself is a semi-example. If she needs to spell her last name, she sometimes says "S-C-H-U-M-A-N like the composer, but with one 'N'". No one has ever asked me [[SmallReferencePools who I was talking about]], take that as you will. ** There actually was a fairly famous composer named William Schuman.

Unfortunately, that's useless for helping people spell your name, as they'll probably think of Robert first. * I knew a girl named Frida Rivera. Her brother's name was Diego. I forgot to ask if her middle name was Kahlo, but that would have just been creepy if true, considering the two painters were married. * This troper has to use the name of a region in a European country to explain how to spell her name. And no one can spell this troper's last name without her repeating it several times. * Inveted for [[@Mikkim this troper]], who has the name "Mik", not like Mick Jagger. * [[Tropers/{{Andrusi}} I]] share a name with a Canadian hockey player, but also once managed to pull it off using just my first name. I worked at [[DisneyThemeParks Walt Disney World]] for a few months, during which I met a kid and his mother who saw the name "ANDY" on my name tag and ''immediately'' thought of the kid from ''ToyStory''. [[OrIsIt "Shhh," I said.]] * When this troper tells people her last name, she gets either satisfied or annoyed when she has to add "As in [[ScarlettJohansson Scarlett]]" for them to get it. * My name is Saling. Pronounced "sailing", like on a boat. Oh my god if I could list all the misspellings and mispronunciations of my name we'd be here all day. I've gained the nickname "Boat Salad" because of the two best mispronunciations/just not giving a shit and calling me whatever. At this point I just want to hear if you can come up with something I've never heard before. [[RuleOfFunny Or is hilarious.]] * It seems every time this troper posts on a Troper Tales page, her {{Bifauxnen}} status is going to be related somehow. Because she had to invoke this when explaining her name to a TA at her school. -->'''TA''': What's your name? -->'''Troper''': Rian. -->'''TA''': You mean Ryan? -->'''Troper''': No, it's '''Rian'''. Like Rihanna, without the "a" at the end. -->'''TA''': That's a girl's name, though. -->'''Troper''': *{{Facepalm}}* ---Return to NamedLikeMyName... Yes, like the trope. ----

NameMcAdjective * This Troper has officially called someone "Dickface McThundercunt" as an insult. * This troper uses this when coming up with FanNicknames. The stuff she comes up with turn out like "Shorty [=McShrimpmidget=]" for [[FullmetalAlchemist Edward]] [[TheNapoleon Elric]] and "Antagonizing [=McLightingbitch=]" for [[KingdomHearts Larxene]]. * This troper's sister calls him Smokey Smokerson when catching him backsliding while trying to quit smoking. * I used to play ''Lunch Money'' with a guy who called the knife "Pokey [=McPokerson=]." I countered with the hammer as "Poundy

[=O'BangBang=]." ** This troper used the name "Poundy O'Bangbang" (after reading this) while trying to roll up a ''{{FATAL}}'' character, but gave up upon slamming into the impenetrability that was the skills chapter. * A memorable piece of slashfic-related meta used "Straighty [=McBreederson=]" to describe unslashable characters. Actually, to make a point about how no character is unslashable, but whatever. * This troper was nicknamed "Shorty [=McFry=]" for a while before his friends got lazy and just started calling him "Short" * This troper's self-given nickname: Awesome [=McCoolness=]. * This is my go-to insult. * Strangely, I only seem to use these on my dog. "Hey, Barky [=McJumpsalot=], calm down, will ya?". * This troper has a friend who calls any hyperactive character on a show/movie/documentary/whathaveyou, "Skippy McPeanutbutter". Also, on occasion, this troper has used this (ex. "Sleepy Mc-I-Need-A-Nap" for a constantly tired looking actor). ---Go back to [[NameMcAdjective Pagey McMain]]. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NameOne ---* This conversation:\\ Friend: All this time, and Manga writers still use the exact same archetypes for their characters\\ Me: if it ain't broken, don't fix it\\ Friend: But they ARE broken! it's annoying! always the same characters with different names\\ Me: name three. \\ Friend: Uh... just because I can't think of anything right now it doesn't mean I'm not gonna google it later! ---'''Wiki:''' What are you talking about? There are a ''lot'' of links back to [[NameOne the main trope article]].\\ '''Skeptic:''' Oh yeah? Name one.\\ '''Wiki:''' I can't. It's a wiki link, you fool! Besides, I already pointed one out to you. Go and click it already!

NamesToRunAwayFromReallyFast * JamesDoyle has a boss named [[TheOmen Dam]][[AlexRider ian]] * To anyone who is either a subordinate and/or smaller than he is, Thomas Umbricht is this full stop. He pulled a knife on this troper when he was 11 years old. * I had a gym teacher by the name of Mr. Paine. The irony was lost on nobody. ** That isn't ironic though, just hilarious. ;) *** Maybe coincidental would be the better word.

* This troper's English teacher had the last name of Covert, which she was anything but. * This troper's father always joked that if she were a boy, she would have been named Wolfgang, Wolf for short. In reality, I would have been named Thomas, but Wolfgang combined with my very German last name would have been epic. * ThisTroper intentionally studied the trope page to choose a name for one of his major villains, a borderline CompleteMonster and EvilMentor for the RivalTurnedEvil, and combined with a name from another page, came up with Yue Lepretto. ** EpicFail, that just sounds silly. * [[@/RedWren This troper]] had a math teacher called Ms. De[[BigBadassWolf Wolfe]]. Common tactics included public humiliation, punishment assignments, and bringing other people who agreed with her into arguments. She also has a good relationship with favorite students and adults, [[BitchInSheepsClothing meaning...]] * This troper's old college secondary school had the army in for a team building day the year before you got to choose between sports leadership, community service and the cadet force. The physical training instructor from the group sent to put us through our paces was nicknamed 'God'. It got worse in the actual CCF exertion wise, but there was another instructor, this time for makeshift shelter building on the survival course. His name was Joana and his catchphrase was "We're in the jungle, I've got a knife, any going to argue?". He was made of awesome. * This professor once had a teacher named Dr. Rathburn. He was challenging, but otherwise pretty likeable. * This troper was at a food hall and noted that any kind of chili product with 'Inferno' in the title was something to get the hell away from quickly. (This troper hates hot things and can't stand chili.) * This troper knows a guy whose last name is Slaughter. I always joke that he should start a death metal band. * I once had a gym teacher whose last name was Harman. He was a nice guy, but every time I heard his name, it made me think "Harm-Man". * This Troper (SteveElOtaku) had an appointment with an geneticist named Dr. Fishman, who acted disappointed that I was completely normal, and had no mutations or deformations. To clarify, she herself seemed to have a bit of the Innsmouth look creeping in... * [[{{Tropers/Joerc45}} This troper's]] last name is often mispronounced as a part of the human anatomy. Ironically enough, his last name is the same as a famous figure's, although said historical figure changed his last name before he took that fateful trip that would change the course of history. That simple fact makes him feel even more confused about his last name..... ** So what is it? ** I'm guessing that it's Coln. * This lurker's father had a doctor when he was young called Dr. Blood. Doesn't that sound like a cheap-o horror flick right there? * Subverted hilariously- This troper and her friend have a longrunning roleplay going. One of her friend's characters is named Blade. Anyone that knows troper's friend would automatically assume that [[MeaningfulName this guy would be really badass]]. Yet, in a world of

supers... Blade... has no power. He's not {{Badass Normal}} either. * This troper's surname is Maskill - pronounced mass-kill. When he was being interviewed with his death metal band by a college newspaper, they asked how I came up with the alias. * This troper used to have a gym teacher named Payne. He was also a {{Drill Sergeant Nasty}} who had some problems hanging up the chevrons. * My mom's last name is Pane, pronounced like Pain. She, both of her brothers, and her dad are/were all doctors. One brother and her dad are/were dentists. And my mom is a Pediatrician (doctor who works with kids, just in case anyone doesn't know the term). * This Troper's Introduction to Criminal Justice class was taught by a bald man with a goatee who used to be US Army special forces and responds to the questions "Have you ever shot anyone" and "Have you ever killed anyone" with the phrase, "Not in this country." His last name was Fears. * This tropers art class once made comics and her group was not sure how to name the villain. In the end, we just called him "THE EVIL". * In this tropette's school, you should run away if you hear the names Pankonin(a sub who subs all too often), Eppert(pedophile gym teacher), or Dirks(vice principal of death). Run even faster if used in the same sentence. * My father's dark past among the thugs of North London, which he has only recently been willing to talk about, is ''filled'' with names like this: Harry the Hatchet, Tommy the Turk, and Skull come to mind most immediately. * Subverted hilariously with the creative writing teacher at my school. Her surname is Grimm, and she is situated directly next to another teacher by the name of Savage. I haven't had a class with Mrs. Savage, but Grimmy is one of the best teachers in school. * This Troper's high school Calculus teacher's name was Mr. Hurt. It fit. Oh dear ''god'' did it fit... * [[{{Tropers/Crion87}} This troper]]'s EmbarrassingMiddleName is Bennett - so you're thinking CampGay or FrenchJerk, hm? It's a vernacular of the Latin name Benedict, which is a rather ominous name [[{{AmericanWarOfIndependence}} if you know your American history]] in that case [[{{TheQuisling}} you know who's being talked about]]. [[{{SubvertedTrope}} Still only a subversion than a straight example]]. An ex-girlfriend called herself Belinda ([[{{NoodleIncident}} don't ask]]) and felt that name was hers - well, that name is a Italian-German composite (like Italy under the Holy Roman Empire) meaning ''beautiful serpent'' - [[{{SmugSnake}} describes her personality and tendencies perfectly]]. * While looking at Atlus's website for {{Catherine}} I had to do a double take when I found out what Katherine's surname was in the game. I knew a girl back in middle school who had the same identical first and surname (her first name had a different spelling but it did start with K) and she was [[{{Understatement}} not exactly the nicest kid]] I knew. Knowing what little I know of Katherine's personality/characterization in Catherine from trailers... D: * My dad had a teacher in middle school named Mr. Hammerhand. ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin.

* When this troper was in high school, his school district's superintendent was named Dr. L. E. Scarr. Not that there was anything particularly evil about him (I guess that would depend on just how much trouble you managed to get yourself into though,) but regardless, I'm pretty sure if I ever get around to writing a book I'm going to have to borrow the name for the BigBad. * This troper's grandfather had to leave London as he frequently boxed for the Kray Twins. To reinforce the time frame, he was in the Blind Beggar when they shot George Cornell. When two people walk into a crowded pub with shotguns and open up someone's head all over the floor then you realise exactly why they were names to run from. ----

NapoleonDelusion * [[ManCalledTrue This troper]] once had a history teacher whose brother was a paranoid schizophrenic. Among his delusions was belief that he was Jesus. ** This troper's schizophrenic uncle never thought he was Jesus, but he was pretty damn convinced that his brother was the Devil. * Yeah, my mother used to be a doctor, and, according to her, the patients she saw with these sorts of delusions almost always fell into one of two categories; either they believed they were Jesus or they believed they were Napoleon. Sometimes both. * Actual sign seen in a new-age shop: "Only one reincarnation of Aleister Crowley allowed in the shop at a time." * Not as big as Jesus, but my Grandmother who is schizophrenic tends to believe she's Sophia Loren when she has manic moments. ---I, the Emperor Napoleon, ordain that you shall return to the [[NapoleonDelusion main page]]! ---<<|TroperTales|>>

Narm * In my experience this happens to novice writers quite often. I recently re-read some stories I wrote [[OldShame in my early teens]]. I cringed at the dialogue. The [[BigNo emotional]] [[BigOmg moments]] were way over-the-top, the jokes were [[ToiletHumor just]] [[ClusterFBomb silly]] and the [[TheReasonYouSuckSpeech converstations]] [[HannibalLecture between enemies]] (sometimes in the middle of a fight) get a special mention. A friend who writes fanfics told me it happens to him a lot... * Last year, when This Troper's parents and her were on their way to Lake Tahoe for their annual summer vacation, her mom and her dad began arguing about how fast my mom was driving. Five minutes later, my mom gets pulled over five minutes outside of a small town because she went over the speed limit and had no front license plates on the car. It was pretty tough to keep my very hard laughing in until we were done with the cop.

* Two words: [[{{WilliamShakespeare}} William. Shakespeare.]] Or, rather, badly acted Shakespeare. This troper is proud to be a huge literature nerd and has been deeply moved by many of his plays, especially Hamlet. That being said, nothing in the world is funnier than watching [[KingLear Gloucester]] scream like a little girl as he gets his eyes gouged out by an actor who cackles like The Joker and looks like Radar from {{M*A*S*H}}. Even our english teacher was laughing uncontrollably. * [[Tropers.ReikoKazama This troper]] is currently reading out the {{BlazBlue}} examples from the {{SNK Boss}} page, and is even [[HilarityEnsues cracking herself up]] at the sheer [[{{Narm}} Narmfulness]] of it. Crowning Moments Of {{Narm}} include: ** Emphasising the words in italics and bold, before going back to her normal voice *** Getting tongue-tied and flubbing pronunciation of some words (followed by laughter and "I can't do it!" at one point) **** [[SugarWiki.FunnyMoments "Stay tuned for more info, because now, we're going to a break! Yes. A spaghetti bolognaise break." * winds said spag bog around her fork* * nom* ]] * Same troper again, currently watching the V8 Utes on Speedweek... the commentators are so full of {{Narm}} that me and my dad can barely breathe. "[=McDonald's=] drive-thru" indeed... I think these guys are gonna become a source of {{Memetic Mutation}}. (The [=McDonald's=] drive-thru thing relates to a comment one of them made on a Macca's car.) * [[LeighSabio This Troper]] is 16, and just had her wisdom teeth out, so her whole face is swollen. When herue evr family kept pointing it out and even calling it "cute", she gave them a DeathGlare. Ever had a Death Glare from something resembling a chipmunk? It's not really menacing so much as it is funny. ** That's the trouble with wisdom tooth surgery: you can't help but be cute and defenseless. For my own experience, I gave up completely and played up the humor. For instance, I made small talk with a nurse about ''inebriation'' while I was under the lingering effects of the painkillers. Not to mention that my mother had such a good time spoonfeeding chocolate pudding to her normally well-balanced 21 year old son, because I (and my completely numb chin) made it so funny. * This troper went to a councer with her two friends for her birthday. As they were leaving, she turns to them and said, "It's amazing being here, but even if we were at a bookstore or a coffee-shop, just being with you made this amazing." Her friend turned to her and said, "That's the sappiest yet sweetest thing you could've said..." * [[GwenStacyWannabe This troper]]'s brother accomplished one of these just last week. It's really, ''really'' hard to be scared of someone when they yell...something like this.(He's 15, to give you some context.) ---> '''Brother''': YOU ARE THE BIGGEST MEANIEHEAD EVER! ** [[{{Cable}} This troper]] did something similar when he and his brother were playing a Japanese dancing game on their Wii (Happy Dance Collection if you want to know), this troper was in the lead until his brother just barely won at the end at which this troper said this piece of gold

---> '''This Troper''': DAMN YOU SEABISCUIT! I AM GOING. TO. USE. YOUR. HOOVES. FOR. GLUE! ** the game was entirely for fun, and this troper would like to add, this is entirely out of character for him. * This troper was at a haunted house with family and her sister's friend. The entire building was eerie, spooky, and dark, like any good haunted house should be. A man in a scary mask fell from the ceiling and chased someone around on all fours, barking like a dog, and it ''still'' remained disturbing and scary. That all changed when we spent twenty minutes walking back and forth along a hallway in near pitch black (door locked behind us, the end of the hallway was a blank wall), while an announcer screamed over a PA system "PUSH THE BLUE BUTTON". This happened at least a dozen times, when we couldn't find the button. It was nowhere near scary anymore, just hilarious. Eventually, this troper's sister's friend screamed at nobody, "WE'RE WORKING ON IT!!". Next trip up the hallway, a door in the middle of the freaking wall that '''appeared from nowhere''' was open, and we walked through it laughing, instead of scared. We never found that goddamned blue button. * This troper is terrified of haunted houses, and as such, she gets followed whenever she enters one (she' the screamer of the group). In one particular haunted house she was terrified, this was directly after being followed through the whole thing by everyone after a guy in a giant evil clown mask popped balloons directly behind her head and then radioed that she's a screamer as she left the room, or at least she was up until they got to the basement. She was walking along with her family, following a creepy tour guide for the basement, and banged her head on a low board she didnt notice. She stepped back a bit, shook her head and proceded to laugh herself silly because all the guys waiting to scare them could be heard snickering in a lessthen-threatening way in the shadows. * Now that we are talking about haunted houses. This troper got into one with a bunch of friends, most of them were screamers. At first the house was amazingly scary, but after a couple of minutes of constant screaming by her friends it just started to be hilarious, especially because one of them (The most scared to top it) knew every setting in the house (It was movie based) so she would enter a room saying "Oh god, this is from..." And would scream at the top of her lungs nonetheless. This troper laughed the whole way (And almost peed herself). To top it all, the screamers were all scared of her laughter. * Every single time my sister tries to curse. It sounds so forced and fake that I often hold back the urge to laugh. * In yet another example of narmy haunted houses: this troper and several of her friends were walking through a haunted house created by one of the clubs at her school for a Halloween-themed fundraiser. The club did a fairly good job of making it creepy, and me and my friends were appropriately scared until one girl's glasses fell off. Everyone came to an abrupt halt, and the "monsters" ''came out to help her look for her glasses.'' It's impossible to remain scared after something like that. * This troper was really scared of haunted houses. I went to one when

I was a kid and I was so frightened I didn't go to another one for another decade. I entered my 2nd one and I realised how silly it all is when I saw one of the dummy zombies wearing an LA Lakers jersey. * [[GwenStacyWannabe I]] was watching ''The Ghost and the Darkness'' late one night with a group of friends who are, well, overly dramatic. Any remotely tense moments in the film (which happens to be based on [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Man-Eaters_of_Tsavo true events]]) were completely countered by my friends' hilarious shrieking every five minutes. * I once saw a band (whose name will go unmentioned; suffice to say they were the kind of hardcore band that gives the genre a bad name[[hottip:* : You know, the "hatred and violence is awesome, f*** the world" type of thing. At one point during the show, they actually said "Love thy neighbor is a load of bulls*** ."]]) that tried so incredibly hard to look angry and serious that it ended up being pure {{Narm}}. It hit the point where I started to question whether the guitarist (whose expressions were extremely {{Narm}}-y, and drove my friends and I to fits of poorly-concealed laughter whenever he tried to headbang) was actually trying to look serious or just mocking the attitude of the rest of the band. * A friend of [[{{Igordebraga}} this troper]] disfigured a girl's picture, and posted it online. Many people went asking for his head. Including her brother, who came in with something so misspelled and angry that it's hard not to laugh when reading. [[hottip: Approximate translation (it was in Portuguese), possibly {{NSFW}}:Whazup you son ova biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch!!!!!!!!!!! Hey, listen up asshole... this girl you're messing with you twat is my sistwerrrrrrr and if you see in the street... depending on the placd... I'm gonna break your face you motherfuckeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer... get smart now see!!!!!!!! you know well who I am !! I'm from your school dumbassssss you start looking around cause I activated my contancts and it's better that they don't find u as well OKKKKKKKK???!!! Pay much attentionnnn!!!! Become a man and stop this shit !! Or else it'll become even worse !!!!!!! If u think u r a man because you were born with a faucet between your legs... this only turns you into a bigger coward you piece of shiiiit!!!! Why didn't you do it to me instead huh??!! Son of a biiitch!!!I'm gonna tear you inn half seeee?! I know wher u live morhon! If you leave hone... get protected and with a [=DIApre=], you shit! Get smart!]] In [[SyntheticVoiceActor Microsoft Sam]], was even better ("putaaaaa - exclamation point,exclamation point,exclamation point!"). * This Troper is a part of Toastmasters, a group that's intended to improve public speaking skills. A colleague was working on his dramatic storytelling skills by telling the story of Fantine from {{Les Miserables}}. The reaction was mixed. For most at the meeting, it was a decent set of storytelling, though the speaker needed to set up Fantine's fall better. For anyone who'd ever heard the song "I Dreamed a Dream" from the musical, though, and then heard the speaker quote lines verbatim from the song in his speech... I had to put my hand over my mouth to keep from laughing. * When YonTroper was roped into doing a horrible school play, he combined this with HamAndCheese, a decision which the school paid

dearly for. Screaming "I SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE ONE TO FILL YOUR DARK SOUL WITH LIIIIIGHT!" (from DevilMayCry) in a serious, dramatic death scene, or going "Son of a submariner! THEY'LL PAY FOR THIS!" (from FinalFantasyVI) or "A BACON SANDWICH?!??!!?!" can REALLY derail a play, believe me. ** [[ThisIsSparta That. Sounds. AWESOME!]] * In general, {{Valbinooo}}'s little sister will say things like "OH NOOO!!" completely seriously. Really. * This troper had a recent argument with his dad. He was making him wear a tuxedo (what's the difference between a suit and a tux, anyway?) and I kept questioning why I had to. My dad finally lost it and started shouting. My dad shouting? Scary and uncomfortable to me. My dad yelling at me while talking in a baby voice and suggesting I go back to my sippy cup? NARM IN THE EXTREME. If he'd let me get a word in, I probably would have told him how stupid he sounded. * This troper once saw a very tall man who wore cool sunglasses, a long black coat and just a little stubble. The guy had action movie written all over him. But he was shopping for oatmeal in the supermarket. ** Perhaps he needed to make oatmeal cookies, in order to SAVE THE WORLD. *** wow small world, I think that was me, by the way here's the best part, I was just helping my Mom, I even realized how I looked about half way in. * My friend and I were looking at some plain worksheets in Chemistry class and for some reason, we couldn't stop laughing! What made it even funnier was that our teacher is a very no-nonsense, StopHavingFunGuys type of person, and '''she didn't care'''. * This Troper, strangely enough, had this once in a dream of hers. In it, one of the villains had helped the heroes earlier. However, one of the heroes was beng a real jerk about it, and was shouting, [[{{ThisIsSparta}} "On-Your-HAANNDDS!!"]] to him. She didn't realize that it was Narm until she woke up. * This Mormon troper was in Sunday school one time. Part of the lesson involved an already very cheesy video tribute to Joseph Smith on Youtube. The thing is, the swirly little "loading" symbol never went away... and at one point in the slideshow, it hovered directly over Joseph Smith's crotch. I wasn't the only one who had to consciously keep from laughing aloud. * This troper has these a lot in her dreams. The most recent was beating up some dude, who stole my glasses and made fun of them before I stole them back, tied him up, held a knife to his throat and whispered "Do you know why I wear these glasses?" before screaming "I'M VERONICA MARS, BITCH!" and walking away. Made stranger by the fact that I have never watched Veronica Mars. Ever. * ThisTroper is taking health class currently, and on the wall near her chair hangs the narmiest pro-abstinence poster titled "101 Ways to Make Love Without Doin' It". It includes gems like "respect one another", "build your trust" and "play 'footsie'". ThisTroper cannot fathom how the makes of this poster believed it would be taken seriously by a bunch of teenagers with raging hormones. ** This troper's brother once read a story about a girl who joined a

school gang, spray-painted her gang name in the bathroom, slapped a girl in another gang, then later got into a knife fight with the other girl, and almost died after getting stabbed by her and [[YouHaveFailedMe abandoned by her gang]]. His brother initially thought it was supposed to be funny. * This troper was in a school play, and managed to ruin a dramatic scene by mispronouncing the word "epiphany". What's surprising is how the rest of the cast was able to make up for it. * When he was 17, this troper went through a haunted house at a local living history fort/museum. The house was incredibly well done, with ghouls of all kinds leaping out from darkened corners, and was one of the best haunted houses that I'd ever been in. That is, until two ghouls jumped out to scare me, recognized me from school or wherever, and suddenly turned rather jovial. "Hey, it's [Troper]!" "Hey, [Troper]!" (And funnily enough, to this day I still don't know who they were.) * This atheist troper's youth minister often calls him a "Godly man of courage." Recently, the church put on a drama in which three sourfaced boys wearing shirts that said 'gravity', pushed three girls who over-animatedly bobbed up and down whilst carrying their problems. ** Er...''what?'' (Also, why go to church if you're an atheist? Even if it's for the lulz, wouldn't it wear thin after a while?) * Jason Amver would like to tell you "I hate you! Hate you! Hate you! Hate you lots!!" * This troper once was being talked at by someone who felt very strongly about their particular opinion. The effect was ruined when said person sneezed explosively and shot a wad of snot across the room. * CrashGordon94 has a little kid at his School who really overreacts to not getting to use the School computers as much as he'd like to. --> '''Little kid:''' [[BigNo NOOOOOOO!!]] I NEVER GET TO GO ON THE COMPUTER!!!!!! * This troper finally got to watch TheBlairWitchProject but it's hard to get scared when a bunch of drunk neighbors are singing "Poker Face" on karaoke nex door. * Yesterday (April Fools Day), this (otherwise asexual) troper sent a love letter full of this to her female friend/crush. She later averted it by just now sending a followup saying that, though highly exaggerated, the letter was true. Here's hoping for the best. * Not so much a troper tale as something that simply doesn't fit in any of the example pages, but. ** When this troper first started watching doctor who, he thought the Daleks were pretty much Narm incarnate. Then they started [[NightmareFuelUnleaded Exterminating]] * This troper was reading an obituary and couldn't help but laugh when the first paragraph stated the person experienced God's resurrection power and was an awesome grandmother. ** This troper's local newspaper has quite a few highly religious obituaries, but none as much so as that. In another case, a man whose mother had died some time ago regularly put in messages asking his dead mother how she was doing and mentioning that he was doing fine. The way they were written and the frequency of their appearances made

him seem borderline-obsessive, but also made them come off as highly amusing. * This troper was able to recognize {{Narm}} at an early age, and her parents, who were avid fans of TV movies and shows like ''TouchedByAnAngel'', found it unnerving. When I made a sarcastic comment about the dialogue, or the implausibility of the events, or how [[LargeHam hammy]] an actor was being, they were not pleased. * This troper was in trouble for commenting on a {{Facebook}} status that called a teacher "Hitler's Mistres". When the principal came to talk to everyone who had commented, she raged loudly, "HITLER'S MISTRESS IS A HURTFUL NAME!" It was very hard to hold back laughs. * In an rp, most people could not help but laugh when the BigBad, Parallaxus, revealed his plan: He was going to steal all the water on the Earth. His speech included the line, "The water on the Earth...IT SHALL BE MINE!!" * I think this one fits here... Once, I was in a small local supermarket, while the following dialog ensued: -> (Scene: someone buys cigarettes) --> Kid 1: Mom, what is that man buying? --> Mom: (in a rather [[Narm]]y reaction) It is poison! P-O-I-S-O-N! [[CaptainObvious It KILLS YOU!]] A serious moment got Narm'ed by the mom's attitude. * And now, for a basic {{Troperithmetic}} lesson: '''School''' + '''WhatDoYouMeanItsNotAwesome'''/'''SeriousBusiness''' = '''''{{Narm}}'''''. Every. Single. Friggin'. Time. [[{{Histeria}} Of course, sometimes this trope]] [[AvertedTrope is averted]], but [[SpellingBee in most cases...]] case in point: [[TheFairlyOddParents "Twistory"]] (despite the episode itself is funny at times, that is, anytime GeorgeWashington shows up, given his CrazyAwesome reimagining). Taken to [[{{Crunchtastic}} hilarious extremes]] here in Italy, [[ExecutiveMeddling because of the habit in]] [[MerchandiseDriven commercial networks]] [[spoiler: [[TakeThat (read: Mediaset)]]]] to show [[strike: pretty much]] '''''only''''' schoolmerchandise-related (backpacks and the like) commercials... ''during summer''. [[FridgeLogic Now, do you remember exactly what have students overcome (and are trying NOT to think about) during that period?]] '''School.''' * Trolls. Some of them succeed in mashing {{Berserk Button}}s, but this troper's seen a few that are [[EpicFail so over-the-top and childish that it's impossible for them to piss you off]]. ** I don't know whether this was on purpose or not, but I was playing Blackjack on TinierMe (I joined because a younger friend asked me to), and this guy started trolling us. He wasn't being that bad, but because the other players were all about 12, he was really freaking them out. Eventually I snapped and went on a rant about how he was trolling us because clearly his life sucks and so he takes it out on the internet. His response? I quote: "ALL YOUR FRIENDS WILL BETRAY YOU!!!!" I just laughed and told him to jog on, which he did (after insisting again that all HumansAreBastards). * Any time you ever have a teacher absolutely flip out at you, it's more likely your class will be trying not to laugh than be scared. RealLife narm indeed. There is something innately hilarious about

seeing middle-aged, very serious, conservatively dressed authority figures absolutely blowing their gasket at people less than half their age. Sometimes, even silent death glares can be just as narmy, depending on who gives them, and how often they do it. ** Same troper. In about 8th/9th grade, our class went to see a performance of War of the Roses, and there was this part where the civil war had broken out, and it was supposed to show families being torn apart and fighting their own kin. Instead of conveying that horror, what we saw was this actor very predictably kneeling down to the ground and shouting, "MY GOD! I've killed my only son!" It was such a ContrivedCoincidence that the entire grade burst out laughing. Yeah, we weren't a particularly good audience that day... * Recently, [[Tropers/LordPentium I]] tried to explain my feelings on a bunch of social stuff, inflation and ripoffs and the shit going on in the Gulf of Mexico with the oil spill, by stating that if the system was going to fail us, someone had to provide a penalty for its neglect. I said "Someone's gotta stop these politicians and bureaucrats, they're running the country into the ground. And since {{Batman}} is fictional, I guess that job falls to me." My mom burst out laughing. I then did, too, realizing how much {{Narm}} I put in that sentence when I mentioned {{Batman}}. * When this troper saw his maternal grandmother's obituary in the paper, which was submitted by his grandfather, he noticed that his family name was mis-spelled. It also claimed that his grandmother had died from a brief illness, when she had struggled with Alzheimer's for years. Even this troper's mother, who had cared for his grandmother (her mother) during that time, couldn't help but find it amusing. * When [[{{Tropers/arcana07}} my]] father passed away, my mother and I held an all-day viewing the day of the rosary service/day before the funeral services. It was upsetting, stressful, and ''dull''! We had to sit there at that funeral home all day and wait for visitors to arrive. My dad was raised by his grandmother so I don't consider his biological mother his REAL mother, nor is she my real grandmother. The only time she ever took interest in my dad was when he had money, then she'd take his money and shove him back to his grandmother (his REAL mother/my real grandmother). But at the visitation, you would've thought she'd sacrificed her whole life to provide my dad a good life by how over the top with fake "mourning" she was. She really pissed me off that day, but what was particularly narmful was when she'd go up to the casket and ''stroke my dad's face''! Mind you, we'd ALL been told by the funeral director to avoid touching the skin too much because it'd cause the post-embalming makeup job to rub off and cause Dad's body to look pallid and not lifelike, so I don't know why the bitch was doing this, but it was bitterly humorous how ridiculous she looked pretending to care like she gave a shit about my dad when she never did. * A girl in this troper's Creative Writing class wrote a story about a girl's experience in the afterlife. It was a serious, dark, and dramatic story, and it was going well until we learned that the main character had hanged herself... from a ''ceiling fan''. ** [[{{BlackComedy}} Who knows...that might have been intentional.]] * My Health Teacher in School will have an outburst and slam the

chalkboard and scream. Me and everyone else are trying thier best to not laugh their ass off. * This Troper was learning about the Black Death in Global Studies class in 9th grade, when her teacher showed a slideshow of paintings from the dark ages depicting the disease, which terrified most of the class... Until the music started in. It was this low, Hallelujiah Choir-type number, which made the slideshow so melodramatic that she started laughing. She was trying to keep it at a muffled chuckle, because nobody else seemed to find it funny, but ultimately failed when a modern-day cartoon of a man reading a book on the Dark Ages and screaming in horror randomly popped onto the screen and made the music seem so unfitting that it caused her to burst out in a loud laugh. The teacher told her she was "sick". * This Troper recently saw Bullet for My Valentine, and the first opening band had an intro with a badass bass drum. This continued for like, ten seconds until this familiar whistling rang out. Immediately, EVERYONE started laughing their asses off until the band came onstage. The intro to said band? The theme to "TheGoodTheBadAndTheUgly". Cue FlatWhat from this troper before laughing myself. ** They do that on purpose...when I went to see them, the song they put on as they came on stage was "O Fortuna". Again, it was hilarious, this time because it was so strangely appropriate. * This frequently happens when teachers feel the need to curse in the presence of children. My favorite? "SON OF A-- *embarrassed pause* -DOMESTICATED FEMALE CANINE!" * This troper once came across a copy of the New Testament in the Hawaiian dialect. Certain passages of the Bible simply should not be funny, but it's hard not to laugh at "And a quarter of da people die, because a da war, because der no more food, because everybody sick, and because the wild animals kill dem." * This troper lives next to a law office called "The Dick Law Firm" (in Georgetown, TX, for those who want to Google it). Every time I pass the sign, I laugh my ''ass'' off; it never gets old for me... * [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CVLf5hHmjfw Less bands should cover this song, really.]] [[CarefulWithThatAxe The singer yowling like he's getting his balls chewed off by weasels]] is bad enough, but then the camera pans to [[FetishRetardant the stupid slut jiggling her overlarge tits]]... cue me laughing my ass off. * Through a combination of Cluster F Bombs and [[{{Tropers/Gumbal1}} me]] being able to overpower him when he attacks me, my dad's empty threats have achieved this level of badness. * [[Tropers.Tesmy This Troper]] and his friends once tried to make a short horror clip a few years ago. Basically, it consisted of a bunch of laughing, talking in weird voices, and [[ClusterFBomb about one curse word every five seconds]]. * This troper one time started screaming at a friend, and only after finishing, realized he had demanded to know whether or not his friend had "somebody's dick swirled around in his brain" needless to say, it ended in laughter and never being able to live it down. * This troper's sister is studying English Literature for A Level. You'd think her spelling and grammer was at least slightly above average, right? WRONG! I was asked to help her with her Othello essay

and, in the first paragraph alone, there were more mistakes than in my entire essay for the same subject the previous year (and I hate Shakespeare as well, which could qualify as a Crowning Moment Of Funny with that in mind). Something was just funny about it, to the extent that her spelling handkerchief as "Han chief" made me and a friend crack up. I immediately commented that I hope she doesn't hope to become a novelist, as I'd probably have to translate the bad spelling without laughing, as everyone else wouldn't be able to last more than a minute. Sadly, as her teacher was my teacher until the end of September and he typically gets slightly annoyed with MINOR mistakes, he may not be as amused... ** On the same subject, she once misspelt coin as "Colin", which was particularly funny when you learn that my accordion teacher had the same name, resulting in a minor Running Joke about the [[NeverLiveItDown Golden Colin]]. I reminded her of it just the other day (and I've made a vow with my dad that, if she ever gets married, one of us will remind her of it at the ceremony, although I'm now going to add the "Han chief" for added humiliation). * After watching MarbleHornets,This Troper had a dream about being tormented my [[SlenderManMythos Slender Man]]. Scary, right? It was... until he went into my computer and started killing my [[TheSims Sims.]] ** On a related note, this Troper had a dream involving a Tron2-like battle-arena setup. Enter Slenderman. He stands there ominously for a moment... then a rainbow hat, and scarf appear, and he starts doing this hat-and-cane routine to [[TheBeatles the Beatles]]' Honey Pie. Serveds as great [[NightmareRetardant Nightmare Retardant]], although [[YourMileageMayVary YMMV]]. * There's a string of asthma attack PSAs airing where I live. Basically, it shows a kid whispering "there's a monster in my bedroom/the kitchen/ex cetra, then the camera pans to something like a teddy bear or a mop with the the voiceover stating that [[YouCanPanicNow ASTHMA ATTACKS CAN BE TRIGGERED BY ANYTHING]]. The general [[SeriousBusiness]] attitude of the PSAs combined with the kids being afraid of something so innocent makes it hard not to laugh. You can view one in all its stupidity [[http://www.clipmoon.com/videos/25571c9/take-action-to-preventasthma-attacks.html here]] [[SarcasmMode Because kids think even puppies are trying to kill them.]] * For some reason, the gifted class at our school treats everything the schoolteachers show us as Narm. The teacher even commented that it's only ever the gifted class that does this - every other class treats it seriously. * I believe Narm is the answer why scoldings don't work: after someone receives a scolding, everyone next to him is probably laughing, and the receiver probably will laugh after the scolder is gone (remember that scene from FullMetalJacket, what R. Lee Emmey did to take out the smile of that soldier?). * Also, I've realized that Narm is something that may come afterward. I realized that reading the [[Narm.CodeGeass Code Geass' narm page]]. I thin we need a trope name FridgeNarm. * This troper had to fight not to laugh when he pictured the king from

{{300}} reciting a speech from the novel of Frankenstein (for those who have read it, it was the one he said when the sailors requested the captain turn back if the ice melted). Luckily, my teacher saw the funny side of it when I mentioned it to him. * This troper and her best friend were acting out a scene from the play ''Ruby Moon''. For those who don't know, the play is about Ray and Sylvie Moon, whose daughter Ruby went missing some time ago and who renew their search for her when new evidence turns up. In the end of the play, [[spoiler: an insane Sylvie dresses up as Ruby and ends up making out with Ray while pretending to be her- he plays along for a bit until things get weird.]] My friend and I were discussing the way Ray should be played in said scene (my friend was Ray and I was Sylvie) with my friend arguing that Ray should be played in a seductive way to amp the levels of creepy, while I argued that he should be played in a loving, protective fatherly way to amp the levels of creepy. After the discussion, my friend played him as seductive... and failed. I have no idea whether it was her acting or the fact that we've known each other for most of our lives, but when she tried to be sexy I tried not to laugh, and it completely ruined the mood. * This troper once had a dream that involved a scene where they and [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frank_Tovey Frank Tovey]](?!) were watching a megalodon 'swim' through (and consequently destroy) Camden Town in London. Watching a huge, monstrous creature destroy parts of the city in which one resides ought to be pretty scary, but the sheer absurdity of the situation made it absolutely hilarious, and this troper woke up laughing. * This troper laughed accindentally when his mom fell into a pile of leaves and was in pain because of the sounds she was making. * This troper is studying TheColorPurple for her English A levels, and most of it is heart-wrenchingly beautiful. But one scene which is widely regarded as Celie's CrowningMomentOfAwesome - when she announces that she's going to Memphis with Shug and that she's had enough of Albert's bullcrap - becomes Narm for this troper due to the line "It's time to leave you and enter into the Creation." Also, while watching the film version, this troper and a few of her classmates cracked up during the Don'tSplitUsUp scene between Nettie and Celie, and for this troper, it was mostly because of how different it was from the book. "Not even death will keep me from it, she say" turns into "'''NOT EVEN DEATH SHALL KEEP ME FROM IT!!!!'''" * This troper considers this line from TransformersRevengeOfTheFallen narmy: "YOU. The AUTOBOTS. They're here to HUNT you." * This troper's mother came down the stairs laughing her ass off over a commercial she had seen. What was the commercial for? A certain type of medication. It came with the obvious "this medication is not for everyone with this condition" disclaimer. The narmy part that sent my mother into hysterics? The disclaimer began with "if you or your loved one experiences pain or death, please call this number". So what am I supposed to do if I experience death from that medication? Call them up and say "I experienced death"? Honestly, most scripts ''need'' to be proof-read... * [[{{Tropers/Redhed311}} This troper's]] mother is addicted to

Coke... Coca-cola that is. Years ago, my brother finished off one of her sodas and her reaction was so over-the-top that to this day, screeching "You drank my SODA?!" has become a MemeticMutation within my family. * In [[{{Tropers/Redhed311}} my]] area (St. Louis), there's a chiropractor's office featuring a neon sign of a stick figure with blinking red zigzagged lines of pain shooting out of its back. However, these lines look like they're coming from an area lower than the back. Since I'm a ''SouthPark'' fan, the effect conjured up [[FartsOnFire something else]]. * This troper's face is... an odd case. With my normal, "blank" expression, people look at me [[FaceOfAThug like I'm a freak]], and my friends often ask, "Hey, are you alright? What's wrong? You look ticked/sad." (This happens ALL the time...) When I smile with my teeth shown, people think I look like a monkey or, in some cases, a [[SlasherSmile rapist]]. It may be due to my rather [[BigOlEyebrows large eyebrows]]. Normally, when I get angry or upset, I try to keep cool. But if you really, really, REALLY tick me off... Apparently, it's the funniest thing ever. I stutter, my face [[TurnsRed turns beet red]], I have no control over what I say, I make spazzy gestures with my arms, I bite my tongue with my tounge OUTSIDE my lips, and, worst of all, I CRY... Often times, if something really makes me upset, I leave in embarassment rather than frustration. * The german fandub of Awesome Gaiden gave me "Oh god help m*jumpscare*GOD CANT HELP YOU ANYMORE NOW!" which is also a meme where I live. * To this Finnish troper, PuellaMagiMadokaMagica became narm when he realised that [[spoiler: Walpurgis Night]] is named after a [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walpurgis_Night#Finland a celebration associated with workers, university students, donuts and heavy drinking.]] * Apparently, when I'm angry, my speech and actions are rather narmful. You can imagine that people not taking me seriously in my anger doesn't exactly help my mood. * Most of the things that fall under the Uncany Valley for many people make me want start laughing because people are so scared of things that don't seem scary at all to me. * I don't know if anyone else's health teacher showed this video, but mine showed us a truly ridiculous video involving things like school shootings and suicide. She warned us ahead of time "the acting's not that good." It was pretty good with being over the top, until the final moment, where the main character walks into his job and finds that the bullies from his school are now working there, at which point he falls to his knees and screams upward "'''LORD TAKE ME AWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY'''" then the next scene is him hanging himself. I have no idea where to find it, but I wish I did. * I experienced some musical Narm at a folk concert. The opening band was kind of an old-timey family band. In addition to your standard banjo, guitars, and fiddles, they had a washboard, a jug, and a musical saw. The saw made such a funny sound that the audience couldn't help but laugh even during the "sad" songs (although that may have been the point).

* Not really conventional Narm, but every time this troper watches Glee, and someone says the show choir's name (New Directions), she laughs because it sounds to her like they're saying "Nude Erections." * This troper once was in a class where we had to watch a video on American society in the 50's and 60's. At one point, it started showing clips from educational shorts of the time, and I had a really hard time not laughing when I recognized one of them ("A Date With Your Family") from MST3K, and an even harder time not quoting Mike and the Bots. * This Troper fondly remembers her 8th grade play. Since she went to a Catholic school, we had to edit out a gunfight scene that was deemed by the principal to be "violent and unnecessary". (We replaced the scene in question with a fistfight/brawl, which she agreed to since there was a lot of it in the play already.) Anyway, the fighting was set to some silly country music and was obviously fake. But that wasn't even the worst scene. There was an obligatory VillainSong, stating the GoldfishPoopGang's plans and motives and the like. The kid playing the male {{Mook}} showed no emotion and had the most hilarious evil laughter any of us had ever heard. I still have this on DVD for some reason... * This troper had a mild case of this while watching the music video to {{Rihanna}}'s ''Unfaithful''. Right at the part where she kisses the pianist, I couldn't help but giggle and think "Damn! Not even the ''pianist'' is safe!" Just something about the fact that she's singing about being a habitual cheater, and she knows it's killing the one she loves, and...then she kisses a guy in mid-song. It's sad, but kind of funny. * This troper's 8th grade health class at one point involved an antidrinking video that was so narmy the teacher gave us a warning ahead of time. One of the scenes involved a kid who was drunk jumping off the porch of his house. And hurting his ankle and screaming in pain. Before he hit the ground. * A mother lamenting that she doesn't spend very much time with her daughter anymore is sad. A mother doing this while lying facedown on the floor, moaning, and repeatedly asking her daughter if she still loves her anymore is just bizarre, creepy, and kind of hilarious. Sorry, Mom. * As a longtime writer, I find that a lot of my old stories are narm incarnate. Even my most recent FanFiction from less than a year ago. Even worse than that are my diaries. I've been keeping diaries for six and a half years now, and I can't even read entries from three years ago without wanting to slap the person responsible. * A few years ago on Halloween I went to the cinema where they were re-showing {{Gremlins}}. When it got to the scene where Kate tells the story of her father dying on Christmas Eve, the whole cinema started to laugh. The experience was so strange that, I'm sorry to say, I started to laugh too. * It doesn't matter how serious the situation, whenever someone gets angry it is really funny and I really want to laugh. This can be a bit worrisome in situations where it's best I stay quiet. I have had to bite my lip and tongue so I don't laugh out loud.

---OMIGOOOOOOOOD! GOOOOOO! BAAAAACK TOOOOO! [[{{Narm}} NAAAAAAAAAARM]]! *** giggle-snort ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NarmCharm * [[{{neoYTPism}} This troper]]'s life (especially childhood) has numerous moments in it that seem absurd but at the time felt dramatic, partly because [[ItMakesSenseInContext the reasons why (almost) make sense in context]]. If, hypothetically, I could make a show or movie about my life story, it would be chock-full of NarmCharm due to the strange combination of the absurdity and the audience understanding of context. ([[CaptainObvious Well, if I managed to portray it as I perceived it, that is.]]) * Regarding the moment discussed under TheKingsSpeech on the main page: the combination of the utter horror of the story related by Bertie and the fact that it all tumbles out in a burst of joyful singing on his part actually made me choke up pretty hard...I'm getting tears in my eyes just thinking about it now.

Narrator * Late at night, this troper sat down at his laptop, his fingers dancing across the keyboard and his head silhouetted by the warm glow of the monitor. As he put the finishing touches on the latest paragraph of his book report, he paused in thought, looking back at the book he had read for class. "I wonder if that's on TV Tropes", he muttered under his breath. Quickly he opened up his internet browser and went straight to tvtropes.org. Minutes became hours as his original search was lost in a flurry of browser tabs and blue links, his eyes glazed as the site became a labyrinth of his own construction. It was not until he felt the ache of hunger in his belly did he finally gain the strength to escape his dungeon. Little did he know that his escape was only temporary...

NationalStereotypes * Tropers/DickRichardson can attest to the "Asian mother wants good grades" thing, ''and'' Filipino stereotypes. (For other Filipinos yes, I identify as Asian. Bugger off), including: ** Bad accents. (Screwing up "b" with "p" and "v" and vice versa). ** Had strict ass parents. ** Come from Manila. * Tropers/DaveIX's uncle is a pretty stereotypical italian, as he's a large cheerful Neopolitan with a thick accent and a ''huge'' curly mustache, as well as being a skilled chef. His speciality is seriously, I want you to take a wild fucking guess. [[spoiler:[[OliveGarden Pasta!]]]] If you can get your puny minds

round that. ** So where yo curleh mustache at? * This troper sometimes worries that someone might think she's trying to make fun of Russians with her tendencies toward sometimesoverbearing helpfulness, chronic lateness, and dressing up for no reason. However, she is frequently offended by her fellow Americans' stereotypes of Russians being mean, drunken slobs. NationalStereotypes can vary widely! * Despite being Australian, MAI 742 has managed to avoid almost all the associated national stereotypes. Likes sport? No. Likes drink? No. Broad accent? No. Nerdy? Yes. Reserved? Yes. Queen's English? Yes. The second-to-third line uttered after "you're Australian?" is always, "but you don't sound Australian". ** This troper has pale skin, is completely disinterested in sport (seriously how do people consider it entertainment) not a big drinker, hates wearing thongs (flip flops not g-strings though she isn't fond of those either) and doesn't feel the to scream "oi oi oi" after someone screams "aussie aussie aussie" while brandishing the flag over her shoulders and cringes when people say 'Fair Dinkum' *** By gad woman, I think I do love thee. * "When traveling as a tourist, pretend to be Canadian." Well, if you live in the north part of america, people will MISTAKE you for canadian if you're actually polite and try their language first. XP * This troper's hillbilly family will be the first to tell you they're proud red-blooded Americans, and if you don't like it, go back to _________. They drive gas-guzzling trucks and [=SUVs=], have no problem with using a rebel flag for ''home decor,'' and believe [=McDonald's=] is a food group. On their behalf, I apologize. ** Seconded for This Troper's family. * This troper, being a Scottish/German hybrid and proud of it, does love to drink. Particularly fond of whiskey, and never had a hangover. I may just be a natural born drinker, much to my grandmother's dismay. Even further, I love fried foods, hate people as a whole and have a bit of a temper when put into the right situations. * My parents are very straight-laced Singaporeans: scholars, hard workers and sometimes ''kiasu'' (afraid to lose). They always demanded good grades from me, until I fell ill from stress during several exams and they learned to accept that I can forge my own path. * This Canadian troper, whom on some level says 'eh', but not specifically at the end of a sentence with a questioning tone, was mistaken along with his aunt for quote, "dumb yanks" by some wankers in Lowestoft, Suffolk, UK while on vacation probably because we didn't say aboot...or speak in a Canadian accent or something. As an aside this troper discovered he 'really' loves maple creme cookies recently...so it's a bit of a subversion and a playing it straight. ** You do realize that basicly no-one outside North America can tell the difference between an American and Canadian accent, right? * This Troper wishes for once he could watch an American show where the British aren't always polite and drink Tea (Especially Teens), since he is yet to meet anyone act that wat way, hell, the only people he knows who drink tea regularly is his father, who does it because he works a long shift and needs the energy, or his sisters who picked it

up from him. He can say that while his own teeth aren't perfect, he has never met anyone with the Teeth from FamilyGuy or FairlyOddParents, ''some'' have minor problems but that's mostly because Dentists pretty much suck, and that the most commonly used Dental practice in his area is ran by a Cold hearted bitch who once made the roof of his mouth bleed and tried to tell me I ''Wasn't'' in pain and 'yanked' out several of another guys teeth because ''One'' was bad. And the Gay thing, he is yet to meet anyone who ins't homophobic or an over-compensating Jack ass. Hell, He wishes for once a British guy would be potrayed more accurately: Drink heavily, louts, chavs, angry, mean, jerks, with a wide variety of accents, all phasing in or out of nice sounding to horrible, yeah, sure, the posh accent may be FetishFuel for American's, but the troper has met Londoners who aren't nearly as posh and abuse the benefits system. Hell, he'd openly use and make fun of them if this was the stereotype as he has met millions of these types of people. ---Go back to NationalStereotypes, you drunk Irishman. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NationStates List the tropes that apply to your own NationStates nation here! ----{{Nightraid}} * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=Genomita The Community of Genomita]] ** BioAugmentation: We are pretty big on this. ** CoolBoat: Back during it's origin in the arctic, Genomita was very dependant on it's navy, so you could expect a lot of these. We have since moved on to cool {{Living Ship}}s. ** GrimUpNorth: Qaura, the current homeworld of the Genomitan civisation, is a DeathWorld consisting pretty much 90% of ocean and icebergs, though the oceans are teeming with life. ** HiveMind: Genomitans have a form of shared conciousness that allows them to share the thoughts, feelings and sensations of those around them without taking away their individuality. ** InstantSedation: More like nigh-instant MushroomSamba. The Genomitan army is very fond of using powerful hallucinogens to take out enemy soldiers without killing them. ** MushroomSamba: We have organic bullets and even artillery grenades that can do this to enemy soldiers. ** OfficerAndAGentleman: Genomitan officers are expected to conduct themselves in a polite and honorable manner. ** OrganicTechnology: Everything from symbiotic weapons and armor to {{Living Ship}}s of all sizes. ** SuperSoldier: Pretty much all combat personell of the Genomitan armed forces. ** SuperSerum / PsychoSerum: HONEY, a cocktail of combat stimms that

works much like the nectar in {{Haze}}. ** TranshumanAliens: By now, the Genomitans are so far removed from their human roots that the term is appropriate. ** TrueNeutral: The Genomitan Government is mainly concerned with three things: The well-being of the collective, maintaining good relation with it's neighbours and [[ForScience scientific progress]]. ** UnderwaterCity: The majority of the genomitan population lives in one of these. {{Viridia}} * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=Vetokia%20Prime The Confederacy of Vetokia Prime]] ** PoweredArmor: Nothing else suits a Marines quite like power armour. ** SuperSoldier: Pretty much every single one of the Furious Fifth is grown for this purpose. Shame that most are crazy from the experience. ** SpaceDoesNotWorkThatWay: They use X-rays to open FTL portals into other dimensions. {{Neo Genesis}} * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=genesis_era The Reborn Senate of Genesis Era]] ** {{Ambadassador}}: Chancellor Neo Via, having survived an assassination, got pimped up with [[ArtificialLimbs a robotic arm]]. [[FrickinLaserBeams WITH A LASER.]] ** ChildSoldiers: Also includes [[TykeBomb TykeBombs]], SuperSoldiers and [[CommandAndConquer Psychic Schoolgirls]]. All from the age of 12. ** CoolBoat: More like Cool Floating Fortresses. The size of ISLANDS. ** NoodleIncident: The time when the Health Department came across {{Pandemic}} about the same time some one caught a flu. [[HilarityEnsues Hilarity ensued.]] ** TheFederation: of course. ** TheGoodChancellor: Again, Neo Via. [[{{Ambadassador}} At least when he's not dealing with]] [[AnarchyIsChaos anarchists]]. ** NeutralGood: We try, at least. Smiting down violent anarchists with a cyborg army does quite a number to your neutrality. {{MS3049}} * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=Edlichbury The Undead Empire of Edlichbury]] ** AnimateDead: Resident Necromancer of gatesville. In my defense, wars are costly on human life. And zombies don't demand paychecks. *** [[NightOfTheLivingMooks Cue the zombie mooks!]] ** BreadAndCircuses: The leader is named "Panemes" for a reason. ** CameBackWrong: The nation's leader. Also caused civil war when it happened. ** CivilWar: Necromancy supporters vs. everyone else. Ended with the Battle for Plures Lamina. ** ChaoticEvil ** DarkMessiah: Edlichbury openly accepts the dead and dying. Despite being evil, the quality of life in the empire is quite high. ** DefectorFromDecadence: Resigned from the WA with the only reason being one private TG explaining that the WA's {{Holier Than Thou}}

attitude and decadent attitude in the higher ranks was not meshing well. ** DespairEventHorizon: Panemes getting killed. Then he came back. {{It Got Worse}}. ** EvilVersusEvil: My view on gatesville vs. WA. Well, before the massacre. ** IControlMyMinionsThrough: Corruption for any undead, fear for the living. ** MagnificentBastard: Panemes, the leader, managed to wrest control due to his inate charisma and his loyal followers. No one knew he practiced Necromancy until his death. ** MeaningfulName: While unitentional at first, Ed''lich''bury. ** MoralEventHorizon: Necromancy during battle became popular after the Battle for Plures Lamina. Our neighbors were less than pleased. ** StandardizedLeader: Served as a generic transitional leader for one of the gatesville splinter empires. As a leader, I pretty much did nothing important except decide who to become the next leader. ** TheEmpire: Too evil to be {{The Kingdom}} or {{The Federation}}. ** TheNecrocracy: Mix of I and III. Undead are common, but don't make up entire the civiliztion. However, most of the political leaders are undead as they generally are less prone to death. ** VisionaryVillain: We just want to eliminate human's petty disputes by replacing them with undead. At least that way, wars won't cost as many lives. ** WellIntentionedExtremist: Edlichbury might have resigned from the WA, but they will haunt you if you try to pass a false security council resolution. {{Jarmatus}} * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=Kostemetsia The Commonwealth of Kostemetsia]] ** BananaRepublic: For the first ten years or so ([[TwentyMinutesIntoTheFuture from 2260]]). ** BreadAndCircuses: Fairly adept at this, although not, strictly speaking, evil. More amoral. ** ChinaTakesOverTheWorld: As a colony, Kostemetsia spoke English ''and'' Mandarin. ** FalseFlagOperation: Set to be very liberal with these. ** GoodRepublicEvilEmpire: Averted. More a case of Good Republic Evil Republic. ** GenericistGovernment: This, to an extent. ** HauledBeforeASenateSubCommittee: The inevitable consequence of using [[InfinityMinusOneSword quantumbusters]], justified or not. *** InfinityPlusOneSword: Theoretical field-effect quantumbuster. Not practical for millennia yet. ** LandslideElection: [[ActionGirl Emily Sinclair]]. ''Every time she stands''. ** PatrioticFervor: Inevitable; it's a revolutionary state. ** PrivatelyOwnedSociety: In the first few years after the revolution (which was orchestrated by a mercenary company). ** TheRepublic: After the revolution. ** LaResistance: Aforementioned ([[CharacterAlignment Chaotic Good]])

mercenary company during the revolution. ** SleazyPolitician: Thankfully averted. Most Revolutionary-era politicians served in or experienced the War and the massive CharacterDevelopment it brought on. ** SlidingScaleOfLibertarianismAndAuthoritarianism: Authoritarian moderate, gradually transitioning libertarian. ** [[WhyWereBummedCommunismFell Why We're Bummed Terran Colonialism Fell]] {{Yowuza}} * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=anogen_dys The Free Land of Anogen Dys]] ** BigBrotherIsWatching: Seriously, it's even implied on the flag. ** CivilWar: How the current government came to power. ** {{Dystopia}}: 'nuff said. ** {{Egopolis}}: the capital Inchare City (formerly known as Erikha). ** EvilOverlord: National Director Incharge ** LaResistance: The Anogen Dys Resistance Movement (ADRM). ** LawfulEvil: According to the government, "democratic hippie states" cannot maintain law and order. ** MeaningfulName: Anogen Dys is an abbreviation for "Another Generic Dystopia". ** PeoplesRepublicOfTyranny: If anyone actually considers Anogen Dys to be a "Free Land", then I'm calling the local mental hospital. ** PoliceState ** ShadowDictator: Ditto EvilOverlord. ** SleazyPolitician: Many high-ranking government officials. ** TheKingdom: This more or less defines Anogen Dys before the monarchy was overthrown in the 1982-84 civil war (despie the fact it was officially called "The Empire of Anogen Dys", it wasn't exactly much of an empire). {{Gendoikari1}} * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=thurask The Republic of Thurask]] ** AirstripOne: The capital city was formerly named Airstrip Zero. ** BigBrotherIsWatching: Commonplace under the Protectorate. ** CivilWar: 8 so far. ** FalseFlagOperation: Thurask loves these. ** ForbiddenZone: Vanguard Island. ** FullCircleRevolution: Happened after the Communist revolution in 1936, and the anti-Communist revolution in 2010. ** HeelFaceRevolvingDoor: The myriad coups, social shifts and civil wars mean that Thurask constantly changes between "benevolent social democrats/monarchs" and "asshole communists". ** InternalRetcon: The former [[EvilOverlord Supreme Leader]] declared that Thurask had nuclear-powered trains, orbital death lasers, etc. ** LawfulNeutral: At best. *** NeutralEvil: At worst. ** MyCountryRightOrWrong: The core of most decisions. ** RebelLeader: President Fowler, formerly. *** ReasonableAuthorityFigure: President Fowler, currently.

@/TsundeRay * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=shumps The People's Republic of Shumps]] ** CompleteMonster: Its ruler. ** CrapsackWorld ** CulturePolice: Much of the legislation being passed focuses on banning things like HarryPotter, concerts of any kind or any size, and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking playing]] {{shmup}}s [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking on a]] [[IOSGames mobile device]]. ** DarthWiki/DethroningMomentOfSuck: What many foreigners have to say about my country. I don't care. ** {{Dystopia}}: And how! ** LawfulEvil: Its ruler. ** MoralEventHorizon: Subverted. Having one would imply that I used to be good. ** PeoplesRepublicOfTyranny: "Civil Rights" and "Political Freedoms" are as soothing on my ears as racial slurs. ** StopHavingFunGuys: Playing video games is allowed...but only if you [[ChallengeGamer play]] [[TournamentPlay competitively]]. Violation is punishable by [[HokutoNoKen Hokuto Shinken]]. ** TeenagersAreMonsters: ---> "Crime -- '''especially youth-related''' -- is well under control" @/AikoHeiwa * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=gandoor The Independent Socialist Nation of Gandoor]] ** CivilWar: We had one, it was over in about six months. ** {{Flanderization}}: The {{otaku}} aspect of Gandoor has suffered from this. It started off somewhat small, occasionally mentioning how the leaders of Gandoor like certain anime, or how Gandoor has an allanime channel. Now, Gandoor has [[HaruhiSuzumiya Haruhi]] on it's flag, Haruhiism as it's national religion, and it's main fighter planes are F-16s with [[LuckyStar Misao Kusakabe]] decorated all over them. ** GratuitousJapanese: Due to Japanese being one of the four official languages of Gandoor, it's mentioned occasionally that in casual conversation, people will tend to simply insert Japanese words instead of the English/Russian/Gandoorese-English one. ** HarmlessVillain: None of the leaders of Gandoor have been harmless nor villain. (Barring an {{expy}} of Joseph Stalin) But one of Gandoor's most evil policies currently is mandatory viewing of [[AzumangaDaioh Azumanga Daioh]] at 6:00 pm Gandoor Standard Time. ** EvenEvilHasStandards: Gandoor's third Commander, Stefan Ivanov, who imprisoned and executed anyone who opposed him (or even mentioned distaste in his ruling), destroyed churches, synagogues, mosques, and temples, sent religious teachers to forced-labour camps, was appalled at the thought of racial superiority. ** SpellMyNameWithAnS: The person mentioned in the above trope's name has been spelled as both Stefan and Stephan. This troper usually forgets which is correct.

{{AvnasIshtaroth}} * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=grandais The Soviet Socialist States of Grandais]] * DirtyCommunists * SecretPolice: Shows up infrequently and issues ultimatums to utterly destroy a nation. Has power over the military. * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=orrachius The Mechanical Theocracy of The Orrachian Empire]] ** [[ManInTheMachine Cyborg]] [[PuttingOnTheReich Nazis]] [[RecycledInSpace IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAACE]] [[Tropers/TheGDude TheGDude]] * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=aborginia The Great Empire of Aborginia]] ** CompleteMonster: The King. ** TheEmpire: Duh. ** TheFundamentalist: Ruled by one, and more or less describes the rest of the population. ** LawfulEvil / NeutralEvil: Varies between the two periodically. ** RecycledInSpace: It's basically a fascist state WITH ISLAM! ** SecretPolice: The Imperial Guard Military Force. ** SmugSnake Tropers/ChrisWWII * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=lubyak The Dominon of the Lubyak]] * [[http://forum.nationstates.net/viewtopic.php?f=23&t=109745 Read our factbook!]] ** LawfuEvil: We like to think we're this. ** StateSec: The Dominion's Judiciary is this combined with ThePoliticalOfficer for individual Justicars. ** WeHaveReserves: Played straight with infantry, however subverted with tankers, pilots and naval crews. Those things are expensive goddamnit! ** KillSat: The Godhammer Array is this, combined with... ** ShoutOut: Two of the aforementioned Godhammers are named [[FriendshipIsMagic "Twilight Sparkle" & "Nightmare Moon"]] ** GodModeSue: A particular irksome BerserkButton on the roleplay forums. No, your 5 million people can not affored 200 B-2s! ** CrapsackWorld: The Dominion rules 800 million people with an iron fist, and covers an are the size of Europe. Almost a quarter of that territory is heavily polluted by industry from massive cities and factories. We are one of the weaker powers on the NationStates forums. ** TankGoodness: The Dominion maintains 3000 T-666 'Mamluk' Urban Pacification Vehicles. These are massive tanks so heavily armored they can barely move more than 5 mph. The exist solely to satisfy RuleOfCool and are the epitome of AwesomeButImpractical. ** GratuitousLatin: Dominion Pax Dominica -Class Battlecruisers tend to have names like this. Kipperonthefloor * [[http://www.nationstates.net/nation=the_floor_kippers The Glorious

and United Kingdom of The Floor Kippers]] ** AIIsACrapshoot: The AI made by the Four Unit Project, avert this trope. ** AirborneAircraftCarrier ** CoolTrain: Part of the railway fleet is made of british steam trains, which are arguably this trope. ** {{Immortality}}: The prime minister, Sir Nigel Griffin and his friend, Spiridon both have this, sort of TYPE III. ** NoodleIncident: The Christmas of 2029. ** OurDragonsAreDifferent ** OurWerewolvesAreDifferent ** [[RidiculouslyHumanRobot Ridiculously Non-Human Robot]]: All four of them Look Like any old Non-Human. ** ShoutOut: To name a few, Series/DoctorWho, {{Freefall}}, StarTrek, [[DanAndMabsFurryAdventures DanAndMab]], RedDwarf, {{Primeval}}, GoodnightSweetheart, DragonridersOfPern, TheCatReturns.

NaturalizedName * Some time between when this troper's Great Great Grandfather moved to Britian from Italy, and this troper's Grandfather moved to the United States from Britian, the family surname changed from Leonardo to Leonard. * This Troper's surname used to be something that could only be pronounced with very fluent Slovak... Even now it is still very hard to pronounce. Welcome to NaturalizedName, your name is now Tropeson.

NaughtyNuns * Well..let's just say she was kicked out of the convent because she a had thing for priests in confessionals. Of course, she picked the one priest who was righteous enough to not fall for it. * One of the raunchiest people I know is a nun. She always delivers the smut in a way that is more funny than arousing. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NauseaFuel * People of Wal-Mart. Although This Troper can handle some gross-out shows (such as Fear Factor, {{Gintama}}, and {{Jackass}}), some of the stories... Disgusting. They almost make me want to puke. That's my Roommate also gets a nod, since it's just as nauseating, if not, worse. * This troper had learned never to take decent washrooms [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KffebqxPoYE for granted, ever again.]] * For this male troper, the whole concept of [[NoPeriodsPeriod PERIODS]]... makes him [[ColorFailure pasty white]] for a few hours

* This troper can't stand shots of things "sticking out of" the skin. It's hard to explain, but an example usually helps: You know those frogs that raise their young in pits on their back? Yeah, looking at those grosses me out. ** Same for this troper. Coupled with his OCD makes for some somewhat squicky stories such as seeing one of those frogs for the first time this troper spent a few hours in the shower scrubbing his back with a pumice until it was raw and bleeding. *** Ironically, reading about that bit of self-mutilation made me throw up in my mouth a little. ** There's also an episode of ''CodenameKidsNextDoor'' where "chicken pox" takes the form of literal squirming chicken heads sticking out of one's skin. I can't watch it. At all. ** This Troper is more grossed out by things INSET into the skin. Lamprey Fingers anyone? *** On the subject of ''CodenameKidsNextDoor'', this troper remembers with horror the "Pinkeye" episode. In this episode, being hit with a water balloon filled with pinkeye mucus would cause crusty red stuff to grow all over you. The episode's villain turns out to be using this crusty stuff as the crumbs in crumb cake. [[AndIMustScream Bleeeeeeeeargh.]] **** And don't ask what's in the filling, either. Just... don't. -> (ACHOO!) ** Also, two words: Lotus Breast. Anyone who knows their Image Boards knows what infamous photoedit meme I'm talking about. *** 4Chan. [[FlameBait Just... 4Chan]]. *** On a related note, viewing Encyclopedia Dramatica's article on /b/ made this Troper's brain vomit into the fourth dimension. Note to self: Install browser plugin that runs {{BrainBleach}}[=.exe=] whenever RuleThirtyFour images are on a page. Oh my poor unprotected eyes... *** For anyone who wanted to know, I believe it's called Trypophobia (I has it.) I'm afraid to look it up to make sure, though, because yeah, it'll give you pictures like that. **** You're right, trypophobia (fear of asymmetric clusters of holes). While I don't have a phobia of them, some of the pictures elicted a slight ''squick'' reaction from me, and that's [[NightmareFuelStationAttendant saying something]]. Don't feel bad! ** You know that {{Futurama}} episode where they're on the planet resembling Ancient Egypt, and the slaves are building a statue of Bender, and several get crushed under the blocks, resulting in bones sticking out of the statue? Yeah, the look of all the tiny (in comparison to the statue) skeletons stuck into something resembling a character we're all familiar with kinda gave this troper the same "shuddery" feeling many people get from seeing those frogs, even though it's just a ''statue of a robot''! *** God-Bender's nation of tiny people gives me the same squick as any... ew, just see all the parasites, image edits, and frog eggs above. I don't want to say it. * This troper can't stand anything out-of-place or unusual in his food, like small rocks and inse--[[NoJustNo OH GOD NO]], and has took ''long'' breaks from eating certain foods (especially rice, which can

contain these things) because of a ''[[{{Squick}} very]]'' bad experience or two with them. ** I have an episode of {{Supernatural}} (Malleus Maleficarum) you need to see. Glorious maggot burgers coupled with teeth falling out. Good times. *** Back in homeschool, we watched this video of news and commercials as though broadcast from the Middle Ages. Don't recall a thing about the video except one commercial -- for pepper. With the tagline, "Pepper! It makes it taste like the maggots aren't even there!" (Three guesses as to the visual aspects of that commercial.) ** [[InsanityPrelude I]] can't eat artichokes anymore because of such an incident. I'll let you guys picture it... ** This troper's grandfather will not tolerate the thought of cooked rice in his house. Apparently, when he was in middle school back in the 40's, his agriculture teacher was having the class help move a dead, bloated cow. Which, in the process of moving, ''popped'', and spilled an abdomen full of maggots all over him. When the class got back to school, it was lunchtime, only the school had picked that day to serve rice... ** Remember, teh FDA has strict limits on the amount of insect parts and rat droppings packaged food can contain... It's not zero... * It can't be KD for this troper. One bad experience with a crunchy undercooked macaroni noodle and even just thinking about Kraft Dinner brings up the gag reflex. Think he'll go heave now... ** [[{{@/Amethystasheryn}} This troper]] is right there with you. Not Kraft specifically, but any macaroni. I won't eat it. I had a very similar experience with an undercooked noodle when I was young and ... erg. Also, I had something similar happen with Ramen ... except that time, and for some reason I can still not explain, there was an old jellybean in my bowl and I didn't know till I ate it. Doesn't sound all that bad, but finding something unexpected in your food tends to put you off a bit. ** I ate some [[{{Understatement}} nasty arse]] instant rice once that ended up undercooked. [[{{Squick}} It felt like I had a mouthful of bugs]]. Never again. * This troper has a gagging reaction to anything rotten, possibly starting when he brought a cup of yogurt to lunch, noticed it was past the "best buy" date, went "bah, those things err grievously on the side of caution," and tore into it anyway. He was halfway through the otherwise-normal looking strawberry yogurt when he saw a blue strawberry. Now anything with visible or odorous mold induces the gag reflex, even if he's just talking about an experience in passing. ** I suppose you wouldn't want to hear, then, about the man on ''RipleysBelieveItOrNot'' who has decided that eating rotten food is good for your health, and cultivates his own rotten food, including meat, in jars in his house, which he dines on regularly? ** Milk past its expiration date, anybody? [[{{@/Amethystasheryn}} I]] am totally blind and can't see the dates on cartons and that. Once a friend gave me a carton of milk without checking the label and I took a big, long, unthinking drink ... huge mouthful of rotten milk. I never drink milk anymore without sniffing and tasting very very carefully first.

* This troper, ironically, is nauseated by people, both in real life or in fiction, who smoke cigarettes. Not pipes or even cigars, just cigarettes. This troper gets sick just thinking about it. ** You're not alone. ** So it's not just [[AckSed this troper]]. ** [[{{Nettik}} This troper]] also has this problem. ** Yup, [[RiL me too]]. It's become a {{BerserkButton}}. ** [[{{Nlpnt}} This troper]] can go further; as a 4-year-old, he was taken to visit a relative in the hospital. [[strike: He]] ''[[BrokenMasquerade I]]'' had a dixie cup full of water which I left on a table which was taller than I was ([[CaptainObvious at the time]]). When I came back I took a sip- only to discover my aunt (not the one who was sick) had used it as an ashtray and it was full of wet ash and butts! Since then, I've been grossed off from tobacco in all forms. ** This Troper is badly allergic to cigar/cigarette smoke, and breaks out in the worst case of hives after being exposed to it (breathing it in, less than ten feet from the smoker) for at least a good tenfifteen minutes. My whole body began to itch so badly I woke up several times the first night it happened, convinced something was really wrong with me. The next day, I swelled up and got really itchy hives all over, and the rash lasted nearly three days. Ugh. * Ever had an anti-violence groups come to your school and tell you about the dangers of fighting? I personally experienced such a visit during sixth grade and the stuff they showed were a mix of Nausea Fuel and Nightmare Fuel Unleaded. The pictures included: Cracked skulls, smashed and split mouth, broken arms, wrists and legs (like bone sticking out of skin - broken), HUGE infected wounds, damages on internal organs...the list goes on. About fiveteen people out of fifty-five watchers vomited and at least two fainted...and all of us were traumatized. Now that I think of it, are those presentation are even completely legal? * Animal Planet had a program about what happens to people when they get stung or bitten. This troper could only watch a little of it. Thumbs should NOT look like dead slugs! That was before the video of the kid who was bitten by a rattlesnake getting his bandages changed. * For whatever reason, I imagine disgusting images and usually fail to stop imagining them, my mind doesn't play tricks on me, it tortures me. * Needles in skin. Gaaaaaah. T_T It made the hospital stay where she had an IV in her pure ''hell.'' ** Just plain needles in skin aren't that bad for this troper. It's when something is injected through said needles that she starts squirming and flailing her hands around in disgust. Drawing blood is even worse. * Despite having an interest in neurology and weird diseases (also genetics), [[{{Cameoflage}} this troper]] will ''never'' be a doctor, because she finds the colors of internal organs disgusting. Bright reds, deep reds, sick-looking bluish purples... eurgh. Especially if there are visible veins. (I have a very strong stomach and greatly reduced emotional responses compared to normal people, so it probably wouldn't actually get in the ''way'' of my work, I'd just hate doing

it.) It doesn't help that I hate hate haaaate having to touch slimy things, mushy things, and/or filmy things, but if I was colorblind I could get over that. * This troper still can't stand watching [[GrossoutShow Grossout Shows]]. Period. She also has a terrible case of SchmuckBait... She still hasn't seen Two Girls One Cup, thank God. ** Also, the ''one'' VomitIndiscretionShot in AOSTH is why she can't watch the episode that it's in, and considers it one of the worst of the series. Yeah... * This troper can't stand caterpillars and larvae of anything, particularly the movement of inchworms, and pupae are even worse (mushed up caterpillars. In a thin layer of skin. ''Joy.''). One year for biology we had to study mealworms from larvae to adult-hood - the beetles she could stand, but the squirming worms and moving, bouncing cocoons made her sick. She never could stand to look at silk worms. Now, she also has a disgust reaction to slimy foods (yogurt, custard and some jelly, for example) due to their texture in her mouth. Put the two together, and you have: (not as bad as you might think, but as put people off the food before) [[spoiler:A younger cousin remarking while the family was enjoying pavalova that it 'felt like silk worms'.]] To this day, this troper has not been able to stomach touching the common Australian desert. * Dead bugs. This troper finds them so disgusting that it practically crosses into phobia territory. One time her mother, in an attempt to desensitize her, made her clean up a rarely-used room in the attic, the floor of which was covered with huge dead flies. Cue an hour of agonized sobbing and copious use of toilet paper in a vain attempt to avoid having to feel the crunchiness of the insects. If only it had occurred to her then, rather than immediately after finishing the job, [[FridgeLogic that nothing was preventing her from using the vacuum cleaner...]] ** Oh my god, you're not alone. It's their bunched up legs that stick up in the air that gets me in particular. ** I feel your pain. Live bugs? Fine. Dead ones? Nooooooo. * ThisTroper gags whenever he thinks about veins in the underside of a wrist. ** This troper does too. It helps that I'm absurdly pale, and therefore can see most of them quite clearly. And that I'm terrified of bleeding out. ** You are not alone. I am also very pale. ** This troper freaks out when anyone touches her wrist. I shudder violently once or twice, and jerk my hand away. The wrist feels like such a vulnerable area, with so many veins... Eww... ** Oh God. [[Tropers/{{Umbee}} I'm]] really pale, so I can see all the veins in my wrist. Which would be bad enough, except that it slowly extended to being squicked by my pulse as well. One night, for some reason, I was unusually focused on this, to the point that I couldn't even think of anything else. Which led to a frantic search for a pair of gloves just so I could cover it up. *** Me too! [[Tropers/{{Shadowgirl_13_Chaos}} This troper]] is very pale as well' and shudders at the idea of people cutting their wrists in angst of chopping of hands. I also cant stand all the honeycomb

styled nerves on your chest and shoulders. Urrrg.... ** I din't used to be, but after a stupid incident involving extreme emorage, a wrist and a steak knife ... yeah. It put me off sausages for quite some time. The best bit? Watching the doctors stitching the cut back together, the needle going through the really thin skin and a bit of grey nerve just sort of hanging and, of course, all the pinkish tendons flexing away. Not doing that again. ** I didn't think I had this, but during a stay in the hospital, they ended up having to put an IV in the underside of my wrist. I was already a little iffy around needled, but that completely freaked me out. * [[MrGuy This Troper]] is severely disgusted by that "Cellulite" ad that's been appearing lately. BLARGH * Internal organs in general gross out this troper, though he's able to hold his lunch inside. Still, he was even afraid to play the ''Fantastic Voyage'' ZX Spectrum game because of this. ** This troper isn't squicked by internal organs, but she ''was'' extremely grossed out at one point when she had to dissect a cat's muscles. Unfortunately, that was the day the cafeteria at her school chose to serve pale, limp, very cat-muscle-like chicken in the Chinese food... *** This troper cannot stand the sight or feel of any sort of stomach contents. Fresh, warm vomit is bad enough, but after she took an anatomy class and had to open an actual stomach to see the contents? * Barfs* I'm getting sick even thinking about it. ** On the subject of ''Fantastic Voyage'' (I even had a hard time typing that), my personal Nausea Fuel and HighOctaneNightmareFuel is sapient creatures being inside another organism. No. For the love of God, no. It's bothered me since I saw something of the sort on television as a child, and even now that's the most detailed explanation I'm willing to give. * This troper's sister gets seriously squicked out watching people cut things with knives. Interestingly enough, when I nearly sliced my finger off with a box opener right in front of her, I was the one to lose their lunch. * The smell of alcohol is the most nauseating smell ever to [[{{Nettik}} this troper]]. She gets the feeling she's alone on this one, though. ** This troper also has trouble with the smell of alcohol, but only the kind people drink. Rubbing alcohol, fine. Beer, no. ** This troper thinks wine has an absolutely disgusting smell. ** The smell of both beer and wine makes [[@/{{Amethystasheryn}} me]] sick to my stomach. Can't stand it. * Just ''hearing'' about anything involving blood vessels makes this troper feel nauseous. Once, a teacher was describing how an angioplasty is done, and this troper had to rest her head on the desk and breath deeply for a few minutes to prevent herself from fainting. ** Seconded. Also blood doesn't bug me, but thinking about flow of blood through the body makes me dizzy... ** This troper is exactly the same, and once blacked out after watching a dramatisation of an anaphylactic shock reaction complete with {{House}} -style CGI.

** This post reminded this anonymous troper of a day in biology class. The teacher was standing up at the front in her labcoat and had her had in a tray on the desk. This also happened to be in the unit on the circulatory system. Read the rest at your own risk: [[spoiler: Turns out, she had her hand in a tray full of some liquid that expanded her capillaries, and without warning she took her hand out and slammed it against a piece of paper taped to the white board, leaving behind a red handprint. My first guess was that the tray was full of paint, but she explained what she put her hand in and the realization that she BROKE THE CAPILLARIES in her hand made this troper feel very... light headed.]] * This Troper is grossed out by the smells of many, many foods - fish, most vegetables, cheese... her diet is somewhat limited as a result. * Through cooking, this troper has gotten better at, but does not like looking at small things in clusters: pomegranate seeds, pepper seeds, cantaloupe seeds and pulp (that's the worst of the fruit category; it looks like tapeworms), corn cobs and especially octopus eggs. Since these things, minus the octopus eggs, make up a large portion of her diet, she sucks it up. However, this troper still can NOT stand seeing people slather mayonaise on things. Urgh. * [[TsundeRay This troper]] is currently on vacation in a country where hygenic standards are fairly low compared to in America. For this reason, he has trouble using bathrooms and showers there. * This anonymous troper has trouble with eating almost all mushrooms (save Shiitake for whatever reason) and tofu because of the mouth feel. There's just something about that slimy, semi-firm ''something'' that feels like you're swallowing some sort of internal organ. ** I have the same problem. It also extends to veins/sinews in nonground meat. I once almost threw up because I didn't cut around the veins/sinews/whatever in a steak and my gag reflex went off. Then that goes into just the textures of some foods. Like, I can't eat it if it's a texture that squicks me out. * This troper has learned to avoid eating on Monday mornings because that's when he has a pathology lecture. (Only for one more week at time of writing, though). * This troper had trouble reading the Narutaru manga because he had episodes of nausea a few times towards the end. * This troper learned the hard way why dried fruits are {{Squick}}y. * This troper hangs out at an on-campus club that is also frequented by a particularly obese guy. Said guy sometimes stinks up the room. Cue him coming up with bullshit reasons to leave and go home. * This troper's Horticulture professor (A tree specialist) relayed this horror story to us in class. He was visiting a client who was complaining about how a tree had this black ooze on it, almost liek it was oozing out of a hole. So he goes over to see it, and the client says, "Yeah, it's like, inside the tree, lemme show you" and takes out a pocket knife. The pressure inside the rotting tree immediately went '''''BOOOM!''''' before the professor could even say "Don't do that!!" Fortunately they sruvived, but they got quite a bit of black ooze on them. * Speaking of teratomas - [[BlueByrd this Troper]] grew one of those [[ChestBurster in her lower abdomen]]. It contained hair, skin, teeth

and something that may have been ''brain'' tissue. She'd just turned fifteen when she had to have it removed. Imagine how she felt when told what had been inside of her, [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel growing]]. * I will '''''NEVER''''' drink Beer in my life. Do you know what it looks and smells like, when you realize after a dinner of Asparagus, that you have a bladder infection? Yep - Beer. In fact, I think the urine even ''smelled'' better. (And therefore tasted) ** This troper is also not drinking wine because he ''knows'' what it is...Like the time he drank a juice box in 1992 that expired in 1989. (Yes, we had that in our fridge somehow) * This troper doesn't have just a ''fear'' of seeing actual blood (or blood that looks real, not animated), but she starts to feel very sick from the pit of her stomach if she looks at it too long. This is accompanied by shakes and feeling much warmer than normal... ** Is it when the different componants seperate and form fractals? because I could understand that to a degree, since it sort of looks like someone got put through a wood-chipper. * I remember quite vividly an incident in which my family was taking a holiday on a farm in Phillip Island during New Years, when one of the eggs provided by the farm's owners turned out to contain a half-formed embryo. Needless to say, it turned This Troper off eggs for quite some time, to the point where he began to fear cracking them. * This troper hates the '''smell''' of any meat or any of its products. It's enough to make him consider vegetarianism seriously (too bad everybody in his family hates vegetarians). ** Oh, did you go back to school after a break and discover that all the meat in the cafeteria went bad because of a power outage? [[Tropers/{{G-Mon}} This Troper]] did. Didn't make him consider vegetarianism, though. ** In fact, this troper has met a girl whose vegetarianism was exactly justified by this trope. ** So you forcefully subject yourself to NauseaFuel just to please your family? *** More like "in order to not starve". * Do you know the large, petal-less flowers that are sometimes in fake flower arrangements? The ones that have the pockets all inside the front with a dried seed pouch nested loosely in each (when the seed pouch hasn't been pried out or fallen out, of course)? My university uses them all over the place, and this one can hardly go into a media/music or meeting room without having a mild to severe attack of trypophobia. * ''Beer''. As well as some stuff like that yellow sobe energy drink. It looks an awful lot like you're ''drinking your own urine''. It can even ''foam'' like it does too. EEEERUCK!!!! * Pregnancy. BLLLLEEEEGGGGHHHH!!!!! That is all [[{{Joerc45}} this troper]] has to say. * This Troper ''can't stand'' the look of hair clumps in the bathtub, sink, washing machine, or even on hair brushes. Ironically, I usually end up letting those things build up and clog the drains even more, because I just can't bring myself to touch them. And I always cringe when those "Turbo Snake" infomercials come on, because they show hair clumps being pulled out of the drain...

** Ugh, this troper seconds this. It honestly makes me gag. ** I'm exactly the same. Those things always creep me out to no extent. Imagine my reaction when I walk into the shower and there's this huge clump of hair sticking straight up out of the drain like a huge, hairy insect. I spent about five minutes convincing myself it was hair and wasn't going to kill me. * For this troper, it's [[TheImmodestOrgasm the sound of orgasmic moans]]. They honestly turn her stomach a little, even just thinking about them. * Meat Loaf. Just...'''''MEAT LOAF'''''. ** You mean the food, not the singer, right? *** Course I mean the food. The singer does not look like something that was removed from the toilet. * It has probably been said by other tropers elsewhere, but [[{{Troper/Crion87}} this troper]] regards the [[{{AliensVSPredatorRequiem}} Predalien Queen]]'s attacking heavily pregnant women [[{{FridgeHorror}} (and the resulting aftermath)]] to be a very stern case of this. It was scary, but more due to being overwhelmed with the NauseaFuel nature of such a thing as that Predalien rather than being truly frightened like the [[{{Hell}} inevitable]] [[{{Gorn}} fate]] of the EventHorizon's crew from the movie of the same name (not to mention any unnecessary HighOctaneNightmareFuel from Ms. Predalien and her babies was easily fixed in-verse, seeing as that she got [[{{NukeEm}} incinerated by a nuclear weapon]]...) * This troper cannot stand seeing someones ears get pierced. I'm fine with most of the things above this post, but piercings just get to me ( I had a bad experience as a child with an earing. I was about six and had decided to get my ears pierced, it hurt like hell but nothing went wrong. The woman who did the piercing told me, "keep moving the earing around or it will get infected" so I did. The piercing still got infected and, me being six, didn't tell anyone. The infection got so bad that my skin ''had grown over the stud.'' '''The earing was imbedded in my skin!''' Thank God the doctor just tore it out.) * In 7th grade, this troper's [[JerkAss worst enemy]] was absent for a few days, which was a nice change. When he came back, he proceeded to regale this troper (why she has no idea) with the reason he was out: being hospitalized for septicemia. * This troper is nauseated by the sound of ripping velcro. When the military switched over to ACU's and velcro patches, this troper's father had a great deal of fun torturing her. ** Oh my God, you are not alone. For this troper, it's a mixture of [[HellIsThatNoise "OHGODMYEARDRUMS"]] and "Eurgh". * In First Aid class, this troper was able to watch all the "I Shouldn't Be Alive"-esque videos, including the one where someone's abdomen was impaled with a large tree trunk. However, the troper is a dancer, and nearly blacked out during the one where a skydiving accident shattered every bone below the victim's waist. * Several of the TroperTales entries for HighOctaneNightmareFuel fall into this category as well. * ThisTroper simply cannot stomach eating eggplant, let alone 95% of squashes. The only exception to the latter is pumpkin (of all

varieties), but even then only in pies, cakes, custards, breads, etc. * This tropers sister once had KD, and found long hairs through the holes like they were put there.. * Imagine if you have to eat 200 grams of butter coated with sugar and the taste and feel of it. * About two years or so ago my cat, Yang, got a nasty wound on his face. We at first thought he was bitten by another cat, but the wound was too clean and--dare I say it--perfect. The hole was round, like he had been hit in the face with a pencil. My dad finally decided to check what was wrong after a while after my sister said that the wound resembled ''an eye''. He began to squeeze Yang's cheek to try and get any pus out (if there was any at all), when he said "What the hell?" and told my sister to help him. I couldn't stand to see my cat in pain--not to mention I was always squicked out by things like that-when I heard that Yang had a freaking ''maggot in his face''. We found out later that it was a Botfly. My sister told me that it felt like her body suddenly heated up when she saw it. She almost passed out by how utterly disgusting it was, and I don't blame her. ** Another example would be when my cousin fell down at a playground and his hand landed on glass. He had to get a lot of stitches in his palm and he delighted himself with shoving his hand in my face at every chance he got. *Shudders* * I am nauseated by [[ArsonMurderandJaywalking blood, seeing people inject or put something other than food into their body (other than in the mouth, mainly drugs), and tube-shaped macaroni]]. Why tube-shaped macaroni? It reminds me of the tubes of pus that come out of my blackheads and something else that I once saw in a horror manga. * To [[{{Tropers/Neves783}} me]], ''accidentally'' seeing a picture from that bizarre murder, where this Japanese guy killed '''[[{{ImAHumanitarian}} AND ATE]]''' his victim. ** ''"Must... have... [[{{BrainBleach}} Brain... Bleach...]]"'' * For [[Tropers/ARandomSerf this troper]], the [[{{Gorn}} massacre scene]] from [[{{Piranha}} Piranha 3D]]. Not finding it scary didn't stop me from becoming ''very'' lightheaded for a while. * You know that scene from Supernatural where the crazy chick who got a ''little'' into the loving and started eating her lover? Yeah, that was...rather sickening. Also, the Hunters--or Mgalekgolo--from Halo make [[{{Theoneyoucallwe}} me]] ill. Not them as a whole, but knowing what they're comprised of and how. Urk. ** I usually have no problem with some of the most hard-core {{gorn}} and can sit through many extremely graphic scenes in movies without even flinching, but that scene left me feeling nauseous for ''days''. At first, I assumed it was because it caught me off-guard, but I have that episode on my iPod and after about ten months, I ''still'' always need to fast-forward that scene. * This Troper's first boss's first job was at a ketchup factory in the late 1930s. His job was to cut open the tomatoes that came in and count the maggots. If it had twelve or more maggots, it was rejected, but if it had eleven or less, it went into the ketchup. * There is a thing called "cheese-like product". Imagine eating a large cube of lard... ** A guy [[{{Tropers/Ilshan}} I]] work with spent several years

working in Mongolia as an oil miner. He went out to dinner at a restaurant once with a couple of friends visiting from the UK, and at their table was a slab of rendered horse fat on a plate, to be used as a sort of butter. One of the friends kept slicing off pieces of the fat and eating them, mistaking them for cheese. * Oddly enough, nothing much nauseates me. I didn't mine working safety at a slaughterhouse at all. But because of an evolutionary holdover from hunter-gatherer days, it's very difficult to deal with someone who's vomiting without becoming nauseated yourself. This may have been a great lifesaving tactic 10,000 years ago but nowadays it's just annoying. Worst two experiences: very bumpy C-130 flight started a vomit chain reaction. Ditto with a doctor's waiting room on stomachflu day. One kid chucked in a grocery bag and suddenly everyone else ran to bathrooms or emptied into trashcans. * Burping. The sound of a burp makes me feel absolutely sick. I can't even stand hearing it in cartoons. ** Agree. Burping is disgusting. And it doesn't help how some boys in my class seem to try to let out the loudest and most disgusting burps they can... sure, it's a bodily funcion, but please, ''please'' try HOLDING IT BACK as best you can. * This troper recently attempted to read what is know in hetalia fandom as the financial crisis gangbang comic, purely out of BileFascination...Yeah. Never again. * I once used a package of hot chocolate powder that had been sitting in a plastic bin of camping food stuff (metal pokers for sticking marshmallows on for roasting, stuff for s'mores, plastic utensils, etc.) for a while. It looked just fine, unopened and everything, so I didn't expect anything weird. There was a dead larva/maggot in it, which I only discovered after taking a bit sip and almost swallowing the thing. [[{{Squick}} OHGODWHY]]. * This troper, who can be made to faint by gross things, has gotten better (the only one in my little circle of friends not to be disgusted by talk of rimjobs). But, my ''god''... FearFactor... * This one tends to get [[BodyHorror rash]] nightmares. This latest one, her face was marred my these red, bloody, swollen burn things. Small, jagged holes littered these, sort of like the lotus seed pods. Some were filled with this black pus stuff, and others with these shriveled worm things eugh. * ANYTHING INVOLVING THE INSIDE OF A HUMAN BODY! Especially the digestive system. *SHUDDERS* * [[@/{{Tadaru}} This troper]] agrees with the person right above him. {{WombLevel}}s are half this and half NightmareFuel to him. * This Troper will NEVER EVER eat anything he's seen alive beforehand or that I love too much. Just the memory (READ ON. IT'S A NIGHTMARE. NOT TRUE.) of being served one of my cats in a nightmare makes me queasy and want to cry. ** In a related note, I have no problem eating beef, chicken, turkey, fish, or shellfish, but I have to put on a memory block while eating pork because while I could conceivably slaughter my own cows, chickens, turkeys, fish, etc., I consider pigs too intelligent to not feel badly about eating them. I'm seriously considering switching to turkey sausage, hot dogs, and bacon, and have no problem eating steak

instead of pork chops. But then I think about pizza.... Insert mental block HERE. * I occasionally have problems with staph infections and abscesses that develop on my skin as a result. The absolutely worst spot for them to develop is in my inner thigh area. Once, a collection of three abscesses prevented me from being able to function normally and I had to go to the emergency room to have them taken out. They took them out right in the holding bed using a local anaesthetic because the operating rooms were all full and I had to have them out now. For the faint of heart, I shall not describe what the results of that emergency surgery were. Another time, I developed a particularly painful abscess that I made sure to apply plenty of topical ointments on and bandaged before I -- let it go through its natural course. Still the most disgusting thing I've ever witnessed on myself. * Same troper as the bullet point above: I act as my mom's caregiver and I've taken care of her through many, many medical maladies. If you're a caregiver to someone for at least a couple of years, you'll find yourself facing things that are real Nausea Fuel and overcoming them. The most recent thing I'm dealing with is wiping my mom's, er, backside, because of various health reasons. The more I deal with it, the more I get used to it, though I do make sure to wear a glove on the wiping hand. * Styrofoam. Dear Jesus does it tingle my skin. Even thinking about scratching it and the sounds it produces gives me goosebumps. ** Even worse, slaughterhouses. I wouldn't go into how the odor gets me sick. * This troper's mom once decided to make a honey and vinegar drink for indigestion after seeing it on a Chinese cooking show. *bleargh* * This troper's father briefly worked in the local tannery (as many people in our town do) after graduating from high school. The work naturally lends itself to a [[{{Understatement}} great deal]] of Nausea Fuel. However, one experience of his takes the cake: during one of his first days on the job, he was sent back to an empty hide storage room (where raw, bloody animal hides are kept before being processed) to change a burned-out lightbulb. As he walked across the darkened room, he noticed his footsteps "squishing" on the concrete floor; once he got the light working, he saw why: the floor was literally ''covered'' with a squirming carpet of maggots. -->'''Troper's Dad:''' I need a new job... * This troper had to dissect a rat in class last year, nothing bad there, then we had to take a test where we had to go around and identify the parts. I got up with my table to do this, and when I got to the trachea (which was the last piece) my stomach started doing backflips. I had to put my head down on my desk to keep from fainting. Keep in mind, this was HEALTH. I think it got to me because it looks exactly like a xylophone. I have no problem with them now, though. On a completely unrelated note, sour milk squicks me out. ** Same troper. Try reading this page while eating. ---Return to --[[VomitIndiscretionShot UUUAAAAARRGGHH!]][[UnsoundEffect [gargling sounds] ]] - NauseaFuel here. ''Ugghhh...'' ----

<<|TroperTales|>>

NayTheist ---* I wonder if I count as this. On good days, I am basically agnostic theist (believe that God exists I don't think that any particular religion can be ever be proven to be the right one. And on bad days feels that God is evil (or incompetent) and doesn't deserve worship. Mostly I just hate having to debate. I wish that the only time people talked about their religion (or lack there of,) is when they where directly asked. Is that so wrong? * [[{{Sgamer82}} I]] hold this view. Reason being that I was born out of wedlock and, because both biological parents confirmed independently that they'd ''never'' intended to marry, consider it the best thing they did for me. Thus, because our family being religious might have forced them to marry against their will, my feeling is that I'm a NayTheist because I have a legitimate case that my life was better with God kept out of it. * I'm a skeptic-agnostic and I dislike most organized religion. I don't necessarily have a problem with the idea of God, I just don't believe God has anthropomorphic qualities/a personality, but I don't have a problem with there being St. Thomas Aquinas' "first mover" (though I don't find that to be a logical necessity, either.) I only discuss religion with my fellow philosophy nerds not because I'm an intellectual snob, but because we all tend to be really open minded and like logical, chill debate. That, and you don't have to be a Christian to find [[YourMileageMayVary Kierkegaard and/or Kant kinda cool]], and even a really religious person can admit the ethical implications of certain atheistic and/or materialist worldviews are pretty interesting shit. * I am something of a bizarre fusion of this trope and atheistagnostic: I consider it very unlikely that God could exist, and if he does exist, he doesn't ''deserve'' worship. * I could toss my hat into that ring. If the Christian god behaved the way he did in the Old Testament, I sure as hell wouldn't worship that guy. Although I must say, I'm fairly certain that the gods of all religions were invented by ancient man, and hence they were given human-like properties. * [[{{Max}} I]] am a strong atheist (despite believing the only logical position is agnosticism) but definitely agree - if God or gods were to reveal their existence tomorrow, I would probably shrug, make a snarky, ill-advised comment, and go back to what I was doing. ** [[RitiTroll I]] would probably do the same in that situation, even if I considers myself a strong agnostic (That is: I don't know since there's no way to prove it). When I feel like blaspheming and know it consciously, I'll use the name of one of the god/desses from media I like. (Turning the head of her best friend whenever I curse at Necron). *** I usually just swear by the Great Whoever. Since I believe all gods exist (and are all figments of the collective human

subconconcious) I don't want to offend the wrong one by thanking someone in general so I usually just say "Thank Whoever". ** Add one more to this list, although my position is more like: a God/gods is/are unlikely to exist in the way commonly perceived, and if they do and I have to 'confront' them when I die, that's exactly what I will do. Start a big argument; why should they be masters over us. I'd probably have quite a lot of support, and anyway, what more could they do to me. Arrogant? [[HeroicSociopath Oh, hell yes.]] *** Exactly. I'm a definite atheist, but if any of the gods humanity has conceived of turn out to exist, upon my death they will be receiving an earful from me about how their morals are more than a little bit skewed and they aren't worthy of worship. * [[AmericanBadass I]] am pretty sure god isn't real, but if there is one it's either our creation, or it has no need for worship. Also that if it ever spoke to man, those words have been greatly distorted by us, and if they aren't see the above about no deserving worship. My motto is "even if there is a god, and I had his holy book before me I would decide for [[DeathNote myself what is right and wrong.]]" *** Dude, I don't mean to totally nerd out on you (but this is a pretty nerdy website, so there) but you sound exactly like 20th century philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre. If philosophy is your thing, you should totally check out some of the arguments for subjectivism(the last part of "existentialism is a humanism" springs to mind) and existentialism. If it's not your thing, that's cool too...but I know there are fellow philosophers on here, and I, for on, and am always on the lookout for a new thing to read :) * I am an unusual form of maltheist. I think that Christian God does exist (but is a damn liar about being the only one and the creator of everything), Satan also exists (but isn't an enemy of the former, they are just playing a cosmic Good Cop Bad Cop on humankind), the old pagan gods also exist, and pretty much everybody else does... and none of these deserves worship. They're all sons of a bitch who get too uppity for their own good if you do worship them. However, the old pre-Christian gods are currently the least sons of a bitch and so paganism is quite acceptable for me (though I'm still a Nay Theist myself). ** *Raises hand.* [[KillerClowns I]] agree, though I'm not above cutting deals with [[GodsNeedPrayerBadly worship-starved]] pagan gods, and lacking a better title, refer to myself as pagan. ** I also agree, though I'm quite happy with the goddess I found, making me a firm Monolatrist. I come across as a Naytheist for lack of willingess to talk about her. * I has been wondering what the hell to call myself. I have decided SOMEONE had to cause the Big Bang, SOMEONE had to throw life somewhere, etc. etc. Plus, every single god ever exists in my book. ** "Deist" seems about right. ** I am much the same. Gods exist, all of them (except those who've been KilledOffForReal, who obviously ''used'' to exist). However, I don't trust or worship any of them, partially because a lot of them are probably lying to get more worshippers (the assertion of the Abrahamic God that He is the only deity being particularly annoying: saying you're the best god is one thing, but claiming to be the

''only'' one is just plain arrogant and rude, even for a deity), and the others are mostly massive dicks. That said, I definitely respect them, if for no other reason than the fact a lightning bolt often offends, and thinks of myself as theologically non-partisan. * I don't know what to call myself. I acknowledge God's existence, and revere him to a degree, but regularly calls him an 'asshole' and talk to him like I would any other person. ** I feel more or less the same way, only I see him being less of an asshole, and more having a bad sense of humor. * [[ROBRAM89 I]], a Christian, wonder why it's always ''my'' God. Am I allowed to hate Zeus? Right fucker, that one. ** Put it this way: if we consider Zeus as roughly equivalent to the Abrahamic god, the Satan equivalent would be be Prometheus. You know, the creator and benefactor of humanity, who was cursed to a FateWorseThanDeath for preventing Zeus from wiping us out for petty reasons? (Actually the early church probably had this in mind, one of Satan's names is Light-Bringer.) *** ...Not to mention his sin was pride, and ditto Prometheus, though in a different way. * I hold that God, should he/she exist, is in fact currently a fairly nice person who used to be a prick until he/she realised you catch more flies with honey than vinegar. He/she now [[AllMythsAreTrue occasionally comes to Earth to inspire further religions]], but otherwise [[EarnYourHappyEnding leaves humanity to its own devices]]. * I sort of think God is still trying to figure out the whole "deity" thing, is mostly benevolent and is currently trying a hands-off approach. * I pretend to be a vehemently anti-religious agnostic to monotheistic folks... for their benefit, of course. If they can't figure out their faith, then what worth is it to any deity? My work has weakened the faith of some, and strengthened that of others. Faith isn't a gift you can give, but I believe that is no reason not to try doing so, after a fashion. -MAI 742 * [[GamerFromJump Me, for sure]]. God probably doesn't exist, but if I met him, my first act would be to tell him to keep his buttinski ass out of our business. A demonstrable non-human/non-human-derived entity (I use this term in case we have {{cyborg}}s or {{Ridiculously Human Robot}}s someday) is an alien. [[StargateSG1 Look]] [[StarTrek to]] [[TheSalvationWar fiction]] [[FinalFantasyLegend to]] determine the [[KillEmAll correct way]] to [[RageAgainstTheHeavens deal with]] aggressive or interfering aliens. * I have decided that an omnipotent being would most likely exist in a quantum state of both existing and not existing at the same time. If it is observed by some means or other, it would immediately fall into either category. In addition, the being would probably have such a wide range of StarfishAlien emotions and OrangeAndBlueMorality that speculating on its attitude towards humankind would lead to a severe case of MindScrew. * I am certain some kind of higher power exists, due to personal experiences, but am unable to worship due to uncertainty about which religion is the true religion. I have only come as far as ruling out the Inca/Mayan gods, for they would have died already due to lack of

(human) sacrifices. Will the real divine entity please stand up? * [[AndWeMustScream I]] believe in several gods, I just treat them as your ordinary backyard {{Eldritch Abomination}}s whom we can talk to, love and hate just like any other human being. I accepted the existence of gods, but however, I specifically hated those who are total [[JerkassGods jerk arses]] who demand worship, and thus I embarked on a journey on how to bring those gods down so humanity might be freed from their tyranny. I actually had an arch-rival: The Christian God (no, not Jesus, since I liked Jesus and believed he is [[EverybodyIsJesusInPurgatory everybody]], but that MarySue who thinks he is the one and only God), and [[FreudianExcuse don't]] [[GodIsEvil ask]] [[DrivenToSuicide why]]. * I believe in a higher power, but I don't know what to think on it. On one hand, the Bible says God is good and omnipotent etc, but also confesses all the horrible things he did. On the other, why would an omnipotent deity allow records of his cruelty to exist and prop it up to people? Not to mention everything in between then and now... ** So it's more a case of wondering if god is [[The Atoner]] as opposed to outright distrust/ hate. * I believe God does indeed exist, it's the benevolent father figure part that I find questionable. * I am a mix between this and Agnostic-Atheist, believing that god doesn't exist but if he's wrong and any form of god does exist, only a select few deserve worship whilst most others shouldn't. * One person on Livejournal posted on their LJ about how a scene in a comic justified their own maltheism[[hottip:*:"I already believe the universe is ruled by a god of pure evil." says he.]]. This wouldn't be so bad, except the scene was LexLuthor arguing with Death from {{Sandman}}. The interview the images were attached to has the creators saying that the reason Lex is a FlatEarthAtheist is that his ego can't quite conceive of anything better than he is. In that very same sequence, he loses interest in getting back to life once he learns ''other people have done it''. The fact that the individual in question was using this scene to prop up his own maltheism is hilarious to me, if appropriate, since he's kind of an egotistical jerk himself. * My theological opinions largely line up with this idea as detailed by the ReaperMan quote. Basically, if gods do or do not exist, it generally does not affect me on a day-to-day basis. As such, I don't worry about it and continue with life. * I believe in pretty much all of the gods, and that all religions (that aren't blatant money-making schemes) have some kernel of truth to them. That said, I don't particularly worship any of them, just believe that they all exist, kind of goofing around and generally doing what is mythologically ascribed to them. * [[{{Tropers/Joerc45}} I]] am a variation. I am 100% atheist and dislikes religion, but find myths and stories from all religions entertaining. ** Yes. It would also be really cool if the gods where walking the earth (and if one'd knock on my door and asked politely, I'd gladly invite them for tea), but so would be unicorns and jetpacks. *** Or {{Iron Man}}.

* I cannot deny the possibility of a Creator, but my stance on that Creator is a lot similar to that of HPLovecraft: He's an uncaring [[EldritchAbomination abomination]]. ** Sort-of like the above troper, while technically polytheist, [[{{Tropers/Crion87}} I]] thoroughly believe in the existence of God in terms of Christianity, Judaism and Islam (i.e. all Abrahamic monotheism) as well, except I believe said entity to be a sadomasochistic force that personally equates suffering with pleasure for itself and thus hoists suffering as good as a philosophy merely so it can feed, that it's speaking of its omnipotence is just talk, and that it is only a vile usurper of the true creator's role, an inferior copy of the real thing like [[{{TheParagonAlwaysRebels}} Clu]] from [[{{Main/TronLegacy}} Tron: Legacy]] - and that the real Creator does not have a name of her own. But if we stretch that analogy a little more, seeing the True Creator is distant, I wonder whether worshipping some kind of trickster deity (similar role to Zuse in that movie) might hold water? * While I am an atheist, I used to be a Nay Theist, holding that it's illogical to act as many religious people do and assume that proof that God exists is proof that he ought to be worshipped. Imagine this in other contexts! "Obama is real, therefore we ought to support him." Doesn't make sense, so why would it make sense with God? * I personally that God is too inept to really worship, and that one must find their own "inner God" in a sort of Gnostic way. ---The link back to NayTheist exists, but that doesn't mean you should go around giving it ideas. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NeckLift * My little brother, who is about double my size in wide and a good 5 cm higher than I am(and I am already long for a girl at 1.75m,) AND still growing has done this several times to me. It is highly onconvertable, but it is not as "ah I can't breathe"-ish as shown on tv-shows. I have done this several times to him too, though, because he is one of the few people who can actually get me angry - unstopable rage angry to be exact. Redbull might not give you wings, anger does. Anyway, there is a reason that I keep my fingernails long. I do not have the sheer power to lift him up, but even lifting him a bit, with fingernails about 1-2 cm long is highly unconvertable and pretty marking. * Oh boy. I remember when my roommate did this to me. I was a freshman in college. My roommate had seized our dorm room to play Risk despite it being past 11pm already. I had to get up at 6am in the morning. I asked him to move to the mezzanine, and he refused, so I had to take my blanket and try to sleep out there. Around two in the morning I come back to my room to see if I can sleep there, only to discover that my roommate has jammed the door so I can't get in. I wake up the RA (who was not happy) and together we manage to force the door open. I go to sleep, since both the RA and I felt it was far too late at

night to spend talking about it, we'd discuss it with my roommate in the morning. I get up at 6am. My normal routine is to go take a shower, and then dress in the dark so as to try and avoid waking my roommate. (As opposed to my roommate's behavior at night, where he comes in while I'm asleep, turns the light on, and then leaves to take a shower- leaving the light on). Well, I'm still a little cranky about last night, so I decide to just turn the light on so I don't have to fool around with dressing in the dark. ''My roommate gets up, grabs me by the throat and picks me off the ground.'' (There is a disadvantage to only weighing 120 lbs - especially when the other fellow is probably 190 lbs and 4 inches taller). Complaining about ''me'' being a jerk because I always wake him up in the morning, and how I caused him trouble last night. I remember clearly the feeling. I had no fear, just complete astonishment. I remember the thought in my mind was "Really? Really??". I even said as much to him. Here he was holding by the throat up in the air, and I calmly pointed out all the times he had woken me up, related how he had made life difficult for me last night, and that jamming the door was not acceptable. I finished by asking why he thought he had the right to threaten me, and telling him that if he didn't put me down, I was going to beat the crap out of him. All the while with my feet dangling in the air. Brady just looked at me. Then he put me down and got back into bed. We never spoke of it again, and we never fought again. He moved out at the end of the semester though. * I've done this exactly once, after someone stomped on my BerserkButton after what had already been a horrible day. The result caused a serious case of EvilMeScaresMe and MyGodWhatHaveIDone, and about a week of apologizing profusely to the guy I threatened. * There was an instance when I was at a regional training center in Guam before my deployment (in the military). After two straight weeks of hotter then hell weather and tempters growing noticeably shorter someone gleefully pushed my BerserkButton... I am not a very large person, standing 5 foot ten and a hundred and fifty pounds with a body more dedicated to running then lifting. Before anyone else in the room was able to react I had crossed the eight foot gap between us, apparently leaping at him using a cooler as a jumping block, and had both hands around his throat. I don't remember the details too well but from what I have been told by those there that I not only had him pressed against the wall with his feet a few inches off the ground but it took two people to get my hands off his throat. You would think this sort of thing would get my in trouble but when my leadership back home heard about it my flight chief only laughed and congratulated me when I got home, saying that he if we were ever in a tricky situation he would just push that same button and then point me in the right direction.

NecktieLeash * This troper and her boyfriend were all gussied-up for graduation. Later that evening at my house, after eyeballing his tie with this trope very much in mind, I grabbed hold of it and pulled him into the kitchen where I then ordered him to make me some Ramen noodles.

Imagine my surprise when he not only did as he was told (though I was kidding), but also proceeded to grow more and more ... ''malleable'' as the night went on, falling in line with my every whim, no matter how ridiculous (one of which involved holding my vanity mirror while I combed my hair). This, though I didn't know it then, was the beginning of a very beautiful sadomasochistic part of our relationship. Thanks, Tv Tropes! ** [[FetishFuel You're welcome.]] ** And, that said, thank ''you'' for giving those of us who haven't experienced the joy of neckwear yet some ideas. (yet... I love bow ties... oh, the dilemma...) * This happened to me once. I was at a dance, and my dance class was supposed to meet together in preparation for the dance segment we were putting on as entertainment.\\ My dance partner found me, and grabbed me by the necktie and turning around, with my tie over her shoulder, dragged me across the entire ballroom to the rest of the class- who promptly cheered her arrival. (The girls in particular thought it was amazing and cool). I was quite flustered by the whole thing. Now she and I had been on a few dates, and she surely was more aggressive than most girls I dated, but I wouldn't say she was "in charge" in our relationship. I think she did it to get me flustered- not so much signaling that she was in control, but making it clear that I wasn't in control, either. * This troper had a gf who did this punitively because she absolutely abhorred neckties. And many of the places we went out were more her territory than mine, therefore she already had more control, and we let others draw their own conclusions, which had the side effect of encouraging her more creepish acquaintances to really show their asses. * Used as part of a routine for the LMHS Ballroom Dance Club during their 2008 holiday show performance. This troper's partner was quite weak on the tug. * Has occured to this troper but with a cloth keychain instead. By no less than 5 people including a love interest or two. * Happens a lot at This Troper's university, where the ID is considered part of the uniform, requiring everyone to wear lanyards. On a more personal note, his girlfriend of 2 years always does this before she leans in to kiss him. * This troper's school uniform consists of a tie. Unsurprisingly, this trope is invoked at least a dozen times a day. ** Sometimes, I do that to boys of my class just to threaten them, and some of them are NOT AMUSED! (It means a few times, it backfired in my face...) ** What, JUST the tie? * I consciously avert this. A tie is a glorified noose. ** Well, you got the 'glory' part right. Neckties are awesome. * This troper cosplays as [[TheMelancholyOfHaruhiSuzumiya Kyon]], and has a friend who cosplays as Haruhi. Wandering the convention hall becomes a bit more difficult when getting pulled through it by the tie, but at least the attendees often compliment us for staying incharacter. * Did this in college once to a girl (who I knew liked me) because she

was trying to annoy me, her boyfriend saw and started harassing me, only to have his girlfriend defend me, he then put the tie on his neck and offered it to her. I still occasionally do this to her (her and the bf have since split) when she annoys me. ---Hrk! I can walk to NecktieLeash under my ''own'' power, thank you very-ack! Leggo! ---<<|TroperTales|>>

Necromantic * In the second episode of a ''FengShui'' / ''Wushu'' game that this troper played in, we fought a mad sorcerer who badly botched the summoning of our resident reformed demon back in the 30s when he was still evil. Instead of tearing him apart on the spot, the demon let him believe that he was in control and served his interests for three months, helping him become a very wealthy and powerful man in the [[{{Ghostapo}} Thule Society]] (which in our version of the ''FengShui'' universe was in bed with the Eaters of the Lotus), before systematically destroying his life in true MagnificentBastard style. It climaxed with the sorcerer murdering his family because he believed that his enemies had placed them under unbreakable geas, using them as scrying tools against him to counter his every strategem. The sorcerer went on to become a villain with a serious Imhotep complex, with the mad belief that he could bring his family back and "make things right," and did damage enough to the timeline that he got our [=PCs=] involved when he caused a critical shift that resulted in the destruction of America (much to the chagrin of our Everyman Hero, who had wanted to go back home there) and the Nazis and Soviets being in control of the world. As it turns out, none of the sorcerer's efforts to bring his family back with his necromantic sorcery were working, because they did not ''want'' to be brought back by him. He was willing to try to take control of the Feng Shui sites of Egypt in order to gain even more power to try to bring them back, and he didn't give a damn if he [[SealedEvilInACan freed the ancient gods from their prison in the process in an attempt to control them]], or that the result would likely be an even worse critical shift than the one that he created as the gods took back the world. Needless to say, this guy had to be stopped. ** ''Damn.'' [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome Crowning Background of Awesome]], anyone?

NeedAHandOrAHandjob * My ex claimed back in 1986, that this had happened to him, that when a prostitute had approached him and asked if he wanted to "do some business", he'd assumed she was asking for insurance advice. Guess what he sold? I doubted the story sincerely, as it was a dark night,

and she'd have had to have extremely good eyes to see the very small insurance company logo on his jumper! ** [[FridgeBrilliance Having good enough eyes to see something small in the dark would be useful for a prostitute.]]

NeighbourhoodFriendlyGangsters * When this troper's mother lived in an east-coast city with a large Italian population, it was widely known that the Mafia was also present. There were certain neighborhoods that had no crime, period. They weren't the neighborhoods where the suspected mob bosses lived ... they were the neighborhoods where the ''[[EvenBadMenLoveTheirMamas parents]]'' [[EvenBadMenLoveTheirMamas of the suspected mob bosses lived]]. * This troper and my wife were moving to New York City, and we were spending several months with her family while I searched for a job (she already had one, but it didn't bring in enough to get an apartment). I was having difficulty parking in a tight space when two young men came up, talked me in, and offered to watch our stuff while we unloaded. This saved us a great deal of time, since it meant that we didn't have to lock up or leave one of us with the car at all times. My mother-in-law thanked them, which I took as a sign they were trustworthy, and I gratefully accepted. Later on, when I asked who the young men had been, she casually answered: "Oh, they're just the local drug dealers."

Nerdgasm * Just the ''main menu'' of ''[[{{Portal}} Portal 2]]'' gave this troper one. * When this troper was browsing a site about [[FrickinLaserBeams lasers]] and saw an infrared 3.2W diode laser system for sale at $375 he gasped, his [[JawDrop jaw dropped]] and then he slowly mouthed: "WOW!" * [[Tropers/TromboneChild I'm]] not going to lie: when I first saw the ''GIJoeTheRiseOfCobra'' trailer on Super Bowl Sunday 2009, I screamed and flailed in a crowded room because I realized ChristopherEccleston was going to be in a mainstream summer movie. The other people in the room were ''extremely'' confused. ** Holy shit, Eccleston in a G.I. Joe movie?! * This troper had a massive nerdgasm with full on squee attack, when he saw the end of the Doctor Series 6 episode 2, which is totally out of character for this troper. * A friend of mine said this when I mentioned going to see ''ScottPilgrim'': "I heard it's like a huge nerdgasm." She was right. * This troper, when a friend of hers asked if she had seen the ''{{Watchmen}}'' trailer when it first came out, blurted without thinking a spontaneous, unbridled ''YES!'' and was then told that she needed to be hosed down. Too bad the movie didn't turn out to be as good as that trailer with the SmashingPumpkins song. Sigh. * Screw it, Halo in general gives me a nerdgasm. And fucking cosmology/astrophysics/astrobiology. I'm seeing a theme here.

* One time a friend mentioned he had a 3 Tb external hard drive. I had an epic nerdgasm just thinking about all that data storage and how much ''music'' I could put on there. * This troper had a Nerdgasm when she saw a trailer for ''TheLordOfTheRings'', as well as ''The Tempest''. Literature nerd. XD ** They're making a movie of ''The Tempest''? Right there with you! * This troper has nerdgasms quite frequently, particularly when I read some really good ATLA fanfic or when I see a movie trailer that I like. HowToTrainYourDragon was just one ninety-minute nerdgasm for me, since I've been a dragon geekette since I was little and there really aren't any good dragon movies out there... UNTIL NOW. * Watching the ''Series/DoctorWho'' episode "[[Recap/DoctorWhoS31E04TheTimeOfAngels The Time of Angels]]": -->[[AC:The Doctor:]] The writing, the graffiti - Old High Gallifreyan. The lost language of the Time Lords. -->[[AC:Me (a linguist as well as a Whovian):]] ''[Orgasmic sound]'' *When this troper found out Sonic was in Super Smash Bros. Brawl, he spazzed out and ran around his house announcing the news rather loudly. * This troper was once stopped mid-sentence by mention of a hundred year old unabridged dictionary being available at the local library's book sale. She let out a small, breathy giggle and apparently lapsed into a strange, dreamy smile. One of her guy friends announced in a rather professorial manner that "that, gentlemen, was a nerdgasm." * This troper had a rather amusing nerdgasm when she noted that there was not only a Death Note keyring for sale at her local Hastings but also a Ryuk doll. Needless to say, this troper's father took pity on her nerdyself and bought both for her. * This trThe most memorable one oper has had several nerdgasms. happened while watching the pilot episode of Young Justice. * When I first found out about DragonBallMultiverse, not so much for the entire comic, but a few choice fights. Cell vs. Dabura just had that Toriyama magic to it... Also alternate Krillin vs. Sauzer from Cooler's Revenge. * This engineering student troper had a nerdgasm one while wandering through the drafting department at his local craft store and saw a set of steel triangles and protractors for sale. For those of you who never done any drafting by hand, steel drawing tools are much better than the plastic ones you usually see. * This troper was at used bookstore recently with his equally nerdy older sister and observed her have a nerdgasm when he showed her that they had a first edition of StrangerInAStrangeLand on sale * This troper let out a rather high-pitched squeal, much to the amusement of her sister, when she first saw a preview for "Veggie Tales: Lord of the Beans." * [[@/{{Pastylover2}} This male troper]] has Nerdgasms all the time when watching [[Series/DoctorWho Who]] or [[TheBigBangTheory Big Bang]]. ** [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bVAgyBOe84w&feature=feedlik Three Words]]: [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vIsQ25Krq8 New. Who. Trailer.]] ** Season 6 will give me a heart attack. I nerdgasmed during all four

episodes so far. Particularly ''Day of the Moon'' and ''The Doctor's Wife''. My caregiver could hear me {{Squee}} ''from downstairs''. *** ''And'' it looks like ''A Good Man Goes To War'' will kill me. I will explode because of the intensity of the nerdgasm. I did. IGotBetter. ** I had a huge nerdgasm last night when I created an improv club with my friends. Woke my Dad up! ** DrewCareysImprovaganza gave me a nerdgasm when I found out it existed. * This Troper has them frequently as she works her way through the FullmetalAlchemist: Brotherhood series. A commonly uttered phrase: "*epically long gasp* I LOVE THOSE TWO SO FREAKING MUCH..." * When the trailer for ''MassEffect 3'' came out, I was...impressed. * While setting up my schedule for the next undeterminable amount of years in college, I checked out its Physics section. Oh my God. So much Astronomy. There's even an ''Astrobiology class.'' Cue absurd stifled squeals (I was in the library) and stifled flailing. * One day, [[Tropers/ElodieHiras I]] learned that my university will [[{{Squee}} install Fedora on the informatic room computers]]. I almost passed out. * Me when I found out I was going to C2E2 this year!! The guy who played Winston Churchill on the Series/DoctorWho episode Victory Of The Daleks is going to be there!!!! {{Squee}}. * This troper recently discovered that the media center at her college had two Wacom Intuos3 tablets, and that all the computer units there are from the HP Pavilion series. And they have legit copies of Adobe Photoshop CS installed on them. And they acquired the equipment needed for studio photography and are setting up the studio as I type. I WILL NEVER LEAVE THE COLLEGE EVER AGAIN. * This female troper gets nerdgasms at hard sciences and complicated mathematics. Averted when my biology teacher mentioned that her boyfriend (who is my physics teacher) could remember numbers to 25 decimal places and some idiot at the back of the classroom asked if it turned her on...the answer was a resounding "no". * This female troper throughout watching [[RebuildOfEvangelion Eva 2.0]], then watching it again the next night, then watching it with DVD commentary, etc... * For this troper, watching [[Recap/DoctorWhoS32E4TheDoctorsWife The Doctor's Wife]] made her flail and scream in real life, not to mention completely shutting down her brain for two days. * The idea of simply buying video games makes me shake with anticipation. Which is probably a result from too much nerdgasming. This troper seconds the Doctor's Wife. * {{Portal 2}}. Just, PORTAL TWO. And whenever a new StarWars book comes out. NYAAAA * This troper was visiting her boyfriend's summer home, and she had an absolute moment of bliss when he introduced her to the cutest 486 laptop '''ever'''. That adorably stuttering passive matrix display was just too much. "Oh...''oh''....oh ''yes''...'''''yes! Yes! THIS VIDEO GAME IS SO GOOD!'''''"

* "...Dude, she just had a screaming {{nerdgasm}}." ** "I know. NerdsAreSexy." *** "Are you sure [[WhenHarryMetSally she wasn't faking?]] ----

NerdGlasses * This troper still has his pair, and found them to have enough utility to use on certain occasions throughout his time in the Army. Their massive size in comparison to normal glasses ensures that it's impossible to move your field of view outside of the lens when aiming a rifle. * This troper actually wears his for a combination of reasons. The main reason is they're nigh unbreakable and have survived four years. The secondary reasons are that contact lenses are a vector for disease and can't be washed out in case of a chemical spill, as well as the fact that this troper is an engineering major and uses the nerd glasses as part of his public persona. * This troper's dad used to own several pairs of these. * About thirty years ago, when this troper was conscripted into the army of his European country, he got a pair of those. They were referred to as "Clark Kent glasses" in his native language and the platoon sergeant claimed that the model had been battle-tested by the Yanks in Vietnam. The troper still has them in a drawer back home. * This Troper's glasses are literally a centimeter thick. He's measured them. The reason is, his eyes don't have lenses. * This Troper had NerdGlasses for the longest time. He's now got Gordon Freeman/Spongebob glasses. * Around the time this troper was born, this troper's father used to wear what looks a lot like ThatOtherWiki's picture of "birth control glasses". Hm ... * This Troper used to wear these by choice. After a string of lessnerdy glasses failed to cope with his accident-prone childhood, including getting hit in the face (accidentally) and the nosepiece simply snapping. The resultant NerdGlasses were thick metal and had a reinforcing bar, and 3 pairs were recycled until technology finally caught up to this troper's budget, allowing for a smaller-lensed twoframe rotation of one springy and light-while-strong titanium pair and one with a bendy-metal-stuff nosepiece. Both pairs have coped extremely well with repeated bike accidents and the occasional punch to the face in karate sparring sessions. (Someday, this troper will learn to not get hit in the face.) * This troper wore them by choice too, the infamous army issue "Birth Control Glasses". I'm not that nearsighted, and actually only wore them to parties and clubs where I'd get lots of "I LOVE Elvis Costello!" remarks. Worked better when I had wild anime hair. * Apart from being BlindWithoutEm, if you attempt to take this troper's glasses away from him, he will... um... [[DeadpanSnarker snark at you]]. * This troper had really, really unattractive glasses throughout her elementary and middle school years. As soon as she stopped growing, she traded them in for a much more stylish pair.

* This troper had a pair of them with neigh-indestructible frames for the longest time. Thankfully, when his vision changed, he got a much more stylish pair. * There's some reality to this trope, although not as much as Hollywood likes to think. This troper has glasses that would be NerdGlasses if the lenses were actually glass. They've been known cause physical pain to people with normal vision who look through them. * This troper knows someone on her debate team that will only wear his nerd glasses during tournaments. He refuses to admit it, but she knows it is because he thinks he'll look smarter and earn more points. * This troper had a highschool teacher with glasses almost a quarter inch thick. The guy was obviously BlindWithoutEm but he was also probably one of the least nerdy teachers. (He hand his wife seemed to corner the music classes at the school.) * This troper has a couple pairs of these (one of which previously belonged to her father), mainly for dramatic effect. * This troper had tremendous visual acuity as a small child, but gradually developed myopia by approximately age 16 to 18. When I started wearing glasses--but not until my senior year in high school-no one noticed the change. When finally (and more than a bit angrily) I began asking people--many who'd known me all my life--how they possibly could have missed it, they all said, "We thought you '''always''' wore glasses." Each and every one. Having been a [[ChildProdigy teacher's pet]], I'd been stereotyped as a nerd/geek by classmates since first grade. * This troper has worn glasses since she was three. The styles back then (1994) were super nerdy by today's standards, so for most of my childhood, I wore ENORMOUS round glasses with tortoiseshell frames. Now I have sort of square, black-rimmed emo glasses, but I usually wear contacts. * This troper wears glasses to keep the nasty, perverted, testosterone filled, adolescent boys at her high school at bay. * [[{{Tropers.Akiba}} This Troper]] has medium/large-ish oval-shaped glasses (wanted them round, but optometrist's office I went to didn't have them as an option; I digress.) Got them around the time my class was learning about Ghandi. Guess what I've been called since? * [[{{Tropers.Theologica}} This Troper]] has a pair of nerd glasses as well. In her case, she deliberately chose them -- her optician offers a second pair of glasses along with your first choice. So she has a rather pretty pair in storage that she rarely if ever wears -- mostly for special occasions -- and a pair of thick black plastic rimmed glasses (although it does at least have pink lining on the inside edges of the specs), which she wears near constantly. They've withstood significant amounts of her going to sleep still wearing them, and have even fallen off her face at least once, and survived the fall. * This tropette bought a pair of fake "nerd-glasses" with plastic lenses to keep tree pollen out of her eyes during allergy season. The kids at school thought they were actual glasses, so she hasn't worn them since. Although, they do help her think when she wants to write a good fanfiction!

* This Troper was recommended by her optometrist to pick the lightest frames she could find because the glass was so thick it would cause damage to her nose if they were too heavy. * This troper's boss just got a set of sexy nerd glasses and they're pretty hot. She doesn't wear them often, but when she does this troper notices. Given that there's already a lot of UST between her and him this just makes things weirder. * This troper went out of her way the day she got her glasses, to pick the thickest, largest, nerdiest-looking frames in the store. Just because she thought it was 'cool'. Why did she think that? No. Idea. But they ''are'' fun to draw. * When I first saw Series/DoctorWho, it was an episode with Ten donning his adorable brainy specs. Since seeing that episode, I vowed to always get glasses that somewhat resemble his. ** I also put tape on my glasses one day at school to match my shirt that said "I <3 Nerds". I spoke in the stereotypical nerd voice too. Good times... ---Return to NerdGlasses here. @_@ ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NerdsAreSexy * This Troper's girlfriend would set the whole school on fire. She dresses normally with jeans, and a sweatshirt, but yeah she's damn smart. There were a ''load'' of [[{{Male Gaze}} guys in my math class looking enticingly at her "places"]]. Let's not get into the time she wore {{Zettai Ryouiki}}... * Summed up for this troper with "...and you're a finance major?" Pushed the meeting from "nice to meet you" squarely into "marry me and have an army of babies with me" territory. ** Sorry but this would probably fit better in a "money is sexy" trope. * This troper's boyfriend loves that she is a nerd! From Yu-Gi-Oh to the Team Fortress 2... and ignoring the World of Warcraft addiction... he doesn't mind it. As well as the perverted way she is. That's more points. ** The guy in question has gotten her into Warhammer 40k. * [[{{Tropers/DemonMajora}} This Troper]] averted(or played straight depending on how you see it) with this troper. I consider myself a nerd and rather unattractive but according to my GF I am not a nerd at all, at least not in appearance. So...I'm not sure what I am. * This bisexual troper will just die for nerdy girls or guys. Throw in the NerdGlasses = *swoon* * [[@/{{Ptitlevos5dvs8}} This Troper]] already has a crush on plenty of [[{{Thunderbirds}} pup]][[{{Supermarionation}} pets]], but I never expected to have a crush on ''[[TechnoWizard Brains]]''... I think he has nice eyes... and that nerdy smile... It's nerds like him [[http://www.play.com/Clothing/T-Shirts/4-/11540339/ThunderbirdsWomen-Brains-I-Love-Nerds/Product.html that justify T-shirts]]!

* Nerds ''are'' sexy. Nuff' said. * [[@/KissOfCamine This Troper]] refuses to even consider the idea of dating anyone who isn't SOME sort of nerd. ** Seconded, all my past boyfriends or crushes have been on the nerdy side :) * This troper's boyfriend. Two bachelor's degrees, works for ITT, plays (and introduced me to the wonders of) [=RPG=]s, and reads Aristotle and Plato in his spare time. He's even got the glasses... I am a lucky girl. ^.^ * I think I'm on the receiving end of this. Too bad she's taken, 'cause I like her too. * Based on some girls responses to me (a certifiable nerd. I'd show you proof, but 400 Gb of sci-fi random facts don't fit very well on a wiki page), I'd have to say this is true. Besides the fact that I can look cool, or nerdy almost at will. * This troper couldn't imagine dating someone who isn't a nerd. And literally CAN'T date someone who doesn't appreciate a nerd. I was literally once substantially more attracted to someone (who I thought was pretty cool anyway) when I found out they liked Camus's "The Rebel" and StarTrek. I also literally heard two of my friends have an absolute squeal fest (in joking, of course) over [[ShipToShipCombat shipping in the Trek fandom.]] Hottest thing I ever saw. * I might be. Or I might ''have been''. (Then again, I'm not sure whether it was 'cos I was a nerd, or other reasons.) * What can I say? Intelligence is sexy. * This female troper has really only dated nerds, and finds them extremely sexy and/or adorable. She is also currently single(as of this edit, anyway) ;). ** * Freshens breath* Did you say "only nerds?" * Quite a few of This Troper's female friends are this. None of them realize it. * [[{{Tropers/DitzyGenius}} This troper]] has given up trying to be cool and focuses on this trope, particularly because [[CloudCuckoolander of a tendency to babble on about random facts]] and have [[AttentionDeficitOohShiny tangential arguments]] with himself. * This troper is cursed by this trope and seems to only be attracted to guys more interested in Halo than sex. ** In what way is that a bad thing? *** (Not the original poster, but...) In the sense that the whole thing about women not liking sex is a total ludicrous myth and if you are turned on by nerds you will presumably want to act on your attraction which is kind of impossible if he keeps shrugging you off to go play a game you find to be horribly overrated? Seriously, sharing a common interest in video games is great, but not if the other person would rather game than touch you. ** Wait so...they're nerds and...they don't want to have sex? Either they're gay or they don't find you attractive because the scenario you presented makes absolutely no sense. Do they know you want to sleep with them? *** She (presumably a "she") said that they are more interested in Halo than sex. Not that they don't want to have sex at all.

*** Or they're asexual. This (straight male) Troper would rather play Halo or StarCraft II than have sex if he could find a good person to play multiplayer with. *** Seconded. Ye shall not underestimate the power of a good gaming partner. * This (female) Troper could genuinely not care less what a guy looks like, but if he's nice and has an encyclopedic knowledge of sci-fi trivia then she will {{squee}}, {{glomp}} and ask for his hand in geeky marriage. ** If you meet your geeky match, don't beat around the bush, just TALK to him! Us geeky guys sometimes have trouble making that first move, so don't wait around for him to gather the nerve! * This troper had a huge crush on her math teacher... * This troper's boyfriend is tall (6 feet!), insanely smart, awkward, plays guitar, plays Black Ops (I'm only mentioning this because I'm a COD junkie myself), and a good kisser. I consider myself pretty damn lucky. And I'd also like to admit, right here, that I would never dated a /non/-nerd in my life. ** ...Lucky. * Let me set the scene for you: take a hot, blond young woman. Now have her at an anime convention dressed up like a playboy bunny if you replace "bunny" with a certain pokemon. Proceed to drool, my fellow men. Now add a pre-existing boyfriend to the mental image. Proceed to spit obscenities into your sleeves, my fellow men. ** [[EvenTheGirlsWantHer Sounds like not just men...]] * This troper has a group of friends and one nerd friend in that group. Most of the guys have girlfriends. Guess who was the only one who's ever gotten a serious offer to get laid? (He turned it down.) * This troper's boyfriend has glasses. He also likes Futurama, Dr. Horrible and MST3K, among other things. Hehehe. * ThisTroper wouldn't even ''consider'' a guy unless he was extremely nerdy. The guy could look like the elephant man but as long as he is sweet, has a nice personality and is geeky as hell this female troper '''is sold.''' ** May we initiate contact? * This Troper consistently falls for geeks that are either too socially awkward to make the first move, or don't even realize that she's into them. Unfortunately, this troper is also desperately geeky and socially awkward, so nothing ever happens because neither of us can ever make a first move. * This troper (as well as a majority of the females in her social circle) was completely in love with her best guy friend. Why? They got into a heated argument over which Star Trek was best. Unfortunately, he was the "chubby, goofy kid" in junior high, and never shook the self-image, even after he grew into a brilliant, seemingly confident, and gorgeous young man...so he thought all the attention was a set-up for humiliation. ** Keep telling him until it sinks in. We geeks do have a learning curve. * This Troper's biggest turn-off is an empty head. I would take a a girl has a decent face and physique with a love of learning over a ditzy swimsuit model any day.

** Oh god, I'm sleep-troping! That's the only explanation for not remembering posting this. Either that or cloning... Are you a clone? ** Same here. Led to a rather interesting conversation when my nongeek flatmates were talking about how hot and sexy various lingerie models were. When asked who I thought was the hottest out there, I immediately started talking about this one ridiculouslly hot Belarus cosplayer I once met. ** When asked by a cow-orker what I look for in a woman, I responded, "Intelligence." She seemed disappointed. * This female troper has never dated a non-geek (and only partly because of similar interests), but that's not what she wants to talk about right now. Right now, she wants to talk about a fellow she knows, who all at once is a CS major, a massive anime and video game nerd, and quite handsome, even by normal people standards. It's unfortunate that he has a tendency to be a misogynist {{Jerkass}}. * This troper's boyfriend. Handsome, physically fit and given to carrying a small library of roleplaying manuals around with him wherever he goes. * This troper knew a girl in one of her classes - she [[{{Meganekko}} wore glasses]], was fluent in three languages other than English, was incredibly shy, and was a complete history nerd and wrote amazing stories. Said troper had a crush on her the entire year, and is getting butterflies just thinking about her. * fans self* * This troper's ''dad'' admitted to having a thing for smart girls with glasses. This troper also has a thing for smart [[BiTheWay people]] with glasses. * This Troper won't go out with anyone who isn't a nerd. Ever. * This troper has such a thing for animated/video game guys who wear glasses. My top two favorites are [[PokemonDiamondAndPearl Roark]] and [[MetalGearSolid Otacon]], uuunnnnnf. ** This Troper agrees. ** Once, this troper put on a red mining helmet and was told he looked just like Roark. Ahh, if only this weren't the Internet. * [[{{Tropers/Popette}} My]] boyfriend has a JamesJoyce obsession, mild haemophilia, asthma, glasses, and a love of ''Magic: The Gathering''. Yes, he's also quite attractive. * Uncertain example: This English troper, who's more interested in Warhammer40000, NeilGaiman books and {{Firefly}} than pursuing relationships with the opposite sex. He was also told by his decidedly not-geeky girlfriend at the time in his last year of high school that he was "really cute". As in, immature way of saying handsome cute. I'm not sure whether it was useless flattery or an honest view, but her friends seemed to agree. [[YourMileageMayVary I think the three of them are fucking crazy,]] in retrospect, though. ** Same troper again, back a year later and now in college! I now add that this troper would not be so interested in the girl he currently likes if she wasn't as into AlanMoore, JossWhedon, NeilGaiman and AmandaPalmer as must as he was. And now that I've phrased it like that, it sounds really shallow. ._. * This Troper ''exists'' because of NerdsAreSexy. Both of my parents are very smart, and were attracted to each other because of it. * This seems to be [[GeekyTurnOn why a lot of guys]] tend to like

[[{{Tropers/Redazrael}} me]]. Has (very rarely) led to [[FanDisservice the opposite effect]] a few times when I proved capable of [[ThisIsUnforgivable outgeeking them]] in [[MarvelComics Marvel]] trivia. [[InsaneTrollLogic For some reason]], outgeeking/outnerding them in non-fandom subjects (history, languages, psychology, [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking breeds of cats and their historical relationship with humans]], etc.) is fine. * I am, essentially, a nerd and gamer geek in one. I know almost everything (no joke) on the subject of video games, and the Internet memes and fads and sites and popular things. My IRL friends list exceeds sixty and I've had a few girls fall for me from time to time (1 year anniversary on Aug 25, can I get a'' "Whaaaat"?'') * My "perfect girl" is a) pretty, in a HotAmazon kind of way b) Tomboyish, but nice c) Very, very nerdy. Guess which one is toppriority? ** Sounds wonderful. *** Sounds like me. * At this troper's school, a good third of the "nerd" girls are dropdead gorgeous. Another third are not super-hot, but still attractive. This troper likes intelligence as well as looks- jackpot. * This (male) troper is excited that there are so many nerdy girls out there, but settled for a lazy, unattractive, non-nerdy girl who wants kids, 2 years going and I'm slowly converting her, doesn't stop the other faults. ** Are you trying to be funny or just a JerkAss? ** Yeah, seconded. That's not a nice way to speak of your significant other at all. * This {{Meganekko}} female troper alternates wearing glasses and contacts depending on how tired she is that day. She's noticed that she definitely gets hit on much more often when she wears her NerdGlasses. (Usually by distinctly non-nerdy men, though, nerds rarely approach her - and she's got a few theories about why that is.) ** So men do make passes at girls who wear glasses. * This male troper has admittedly higher standards regarding intelligence and geekery than in looks. He's also falling for geeky and nice looking girl. * This troper had weird crushes on Elvis Costello, Fred Schneider (but only throughout 1983), and Thomas Dolby as a kid/young teen. Know why? The glasses. The freaking NerdGlasses! What? I was a strange little girl who was hopelessly obsessed with New Wave music back then... ** Nerd glasses ''are'' rather sexy, so...yeah. * This troper is either a subversion, or the geek guy she likes is just {{Not Distracted by the Sexy}}. *Sigh* * [[@/{{Renagade}} This Troper]] has glasses, but doesn't wear them very much, plays EveOnline, loves DungeonsAndDragons and FinalFantasy so much that he's marrying the two together in a Final Fantasy based tabletop game, definitely has the geek humor going on, is awkward, shy, and looks like [[http://photos-g.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-aksnc1/v1118/67/36/656644760/n656644760_968718_7062.jpg this.]] * Either subverted or played painfully straight with troper. Several girls he knows all insist that he's hot (personally he can't see it, maybe it's down to being slightly androgynous) but being a nerd, he

completely lacks the social skills or personality for good looks to get him anywhere. * [[{{Tropers/LadyNorbert}} This troper]] and her husband fell for each other because they're both nerds. She was drawn to his [[HeroesWantRedheads red hair]], shy demeanor, and encyclopedic knowledge on a breadth of topics, including ''TheLordOfTheRings'' and ''StarWars''. He was in awe of her big {{brown eyes}}, intellectual conversation, and the fact that he'd met a female nerd who was interested in what he had to say. Together they explore museums, Renaissance faires, libraries, and the occasional cemetery (because genealogy is a common interest). She's not sure how sexy they are to ''other'' people, but they definitely qualify as NerdsAreSexy for each other. * [[{{Tropers/sinisterdexter89}} This Troper]]. History, Marvel, speech and debate nerd. Blonde, green eyes, glasses, tall, hourglass figure and busty. ** Well, hello there. *** More like full of herself. * This is implied to be what my dad thought when he met my mom. And my mom when she met my dad. No wonder why [[MostTropersAreYoungNerds I'm a troper...]] * [[{{Tropers/ArcticVanguard}} This Troper]] is only attracted to nerds. He couldn't possibly stand being with a person for very long unless they had similar hobbies to him, including Halo, StarCraft, and so on. * There are two ways a guy [[BiTheWay or girl]] could win [[{{Tropers/Luna87}} this troper's]] heart: be an animal-loving vegan, and be as big a nerd as I am. * This troper gets love when he wears his "Talk nerdy to me." shirt around. ** This Tropette would gladly "talk nerdy" to anybody with the balls to wear an epic shirt like that. * This troper's social circle all inhabit the far end of the geek scale, and are also fairly exclusively at least 7s. The most notable case is the most crushed-on girl he's ever known - a gorgeous young goth girl. She's a sci-fi/fantasy fan, a huge comicbook geek, a gamer and her cosplay of choice is Death from Sandman. She also acts and Dungeon Master for her brother's Dungeons and Dragons group. '''She's perfect.''' * This troper (straight female) would like to attest that geek/nerd boys are incredibly attractive. Her type is generally as follows: [[{{Sherlock}} snarky, intelligent, tall, and socially awkward]]. Oh, and musical, but that's generally a bonus. That tends to describe nerds almost exclusively, and she's perfectly fine with that. ** WHY DO THE ONES WHO THINK LIKE YOU NEVER LIVE NEAR ME. * This troper thinks geek guys are really cute. * This troper is a pretty nerdy guy, almost to a T. I'm tall, thin and lanky, kinda pale, wears glasses like the Tenth Doctor's, loves Pokemon, Doctor Who, and Yu-Gi-Oh! Abridged (amongst other interests), and has occasionally been told I'm like a much nicer version of [[TheBigBangTheory Sheldon]]. I'm known to quote Doctor Who and rattle off Poke-trivia, and I have an expansive vocabulary that I love to

utilize. I couldn't dream of anything better than finding a woman that shares my interests like I do- but alas, I am ultimately a subversion of this trope. Most girls where I'm from care about looks, money, and nice cars, and the few girls I know who ''do'' appreciate the kinds of things I'm into are all taken, and admit that if they weren't they'd be all over me. Tsk. ** [[{{Tropers/SpessMehren32}} I]] feel this way, except it is even worse for me: I have a female friend who is basically the same as me (except, of course, of the opposite gender), but the Westermark Effect means that I'm unable to do anything with her without feeling like I'm trying to commit incest. And my sister is kind of nerdy as well (not on my level, but still noticeably), so I basically know three female nerds (my mother is nerdy as well), but can't do anything, as it would [[LikeBrotherAndSister immoral]] at best and [[BrotherSisterIncest criminal]] [[ParentalIncest at]] [[AndThatsTerrible worst]]. * [[{{Tropers/bannermanonemillion}} This male troper]] is also of the tall and skinny type, loves sci-fi, comics and is one of the few African Americans I know who prefers metal over R&B. I have used the word 'frak' in real life and can quote movies like Tron and Transformers The Movie by heart. As far back as high school I got crushes on the odd girls or just ones with glasses. Glasses *always* get me. Now if only I could get over that crippling shyness thing....Every time I've met a geek girl she's either already dating, married or just prefers doing anything except dating. *sigh* Still, I prefer to think The One is out there somewhere.... ** Hmm... I beleive I have just found [[{{Tropers/Caenime}} my]] [[GenderBender male clone..]] *** If you're in your mid-30s and can imitate Optimus Prime's voice, you might be [[{{Tropers/Bannermanonemillion}} This Troper's]] clone. * This Troper according to the ladies. Plays Yu-Gi-Oh, World of Warcraft, Pokemon and other console games. Watch and reads a lot of Anime/Manga and attempts to cosplay but lack of black anime guys hurts at times. Martial arts keeps me in great shape and the girls love my afro and glasses. I always stay calm and cool and love to quote [[{{theboondocks}} Huey Freeman]] quite a bit. * This troper would probably fall for the first person she could find who loves Thomas Pynchon as much as she does. Sigh. * Why have I never gone out with anyone? Simple answer: my school suffers from a severe nerd shortage. *sighs* * A LOT of my college teachers have this going for them, male and female. Especially my Game Design teacher. Hrrrrgh. Doubled with adorkable because he's usually a little aloof but cracks every so often when he gets excited about something. Tripled with adorable because he has a cute little girl who's apparently inheriting all of his nerdiness. <3 ** And on that note, this troper finds glasses, skinniness, hardcore geekiness and intelligence ''ridiculously'' sexy. I don't think I'm really quite smart or geeky enough for them though...*pokes fingers together* * This troper dates nerdy girls. Anime, manga, video games, etc. [[http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/profile.php?id=100000114434794 If you're interested....]]

* This troper's current it's-complicated is this - we both qualify (I've been hit on so many times by guys a few years older when I argue an opinion properly) and she's a self-professed anorak with an anime, Vocaloid, Radio Drama and beer obsession (Her favourite beer is a rare Belgium Cherry Beer and she collects the glasses. It's adorable). She's also a writer. *melts* * This is the trope for quite literally every guy I like. Though most of them seem to currently be of the Theater Geek disposition barring a very select few. Possibly myself too. I dunno I'm shy relationshipwise so I've only heard my friend's opinions. * I had to laugh when [[ComplainingAboutShowsYouDontWatch I recently saw a trailer]] for ''90210'' in which a character was acting as though something was seriously wrong with her because she had a crush on a nerd. She should see some of the nerds [[UnluckyChildhoodFriend I'm friends with.]] * [[{{Tropers/Claystripe6514}} This troper]] has been told be several girls (mostly anime fangirls) that my many StarWars, TeamStarKid, PowerRangers, and HarryPotter references are infinitely sexier than the [[HeroesWantRedheads red hair]], [[WhatBeautifulEyes blue and gold eyes]], and swimmer's body. Wow, I feel like an arrogant SOB just for saying that... * He's not a video game nerd or science geek, but the guy's got some serious musical skill (and nerdy music knowledge) and I can actually talk about things that tend to go way beyond the rest of our peer's level. You have no idea how much it thrilled me to call out a Masonic image at the same time in a film we were watching together. He's also quite the art and literature nerd and seems to be fairly cultured in animation... with glasses to boot. Too bad he's [[AmbiguouslyGay ambiguously gay]]. I'd marry him in a heartbeat otherwise. * This troper is on the receiving end of this trope: I'm tall, thin (I'm vegetarian), philosophy nerd, [[ShinMegamiTensei Shin Megami Tensei]] fan, who's 20 and had never kissed a girl. Then I met [[BigBeautifulWoman this girl]] who developed a crush on [[ChubbyChaser me]] mainly because of my intelligence and eccentricism...By the way, there are 3 guys who like her including her ex, who she broke with when i said i liked her, and attracts lots of [[MaleGaze male gazes]] when i'm going out with her. Now I can be my nerdy, awkward self with pride and am here in TvTropes to tell you: Nerds are DAMN sexy...and so are chubby girls. Here are the sections from the main trope page moved here because they are not in-story reactions, ''as the trope requires''. Feel free to add onto them here. [[AC:Anime and Manga]] * Ami Mizuno[=/=]Sailor Mercury is consistently rated the most popular character in ''SailorMoon'' by a long shot. ** Mamoru Chiba[=/=]Tuxedo Mask is also very popular, and has some decidedly nerdy interests. ** Later in the series, Naru and Umino start dating, and it's definitely not because Umino has good looks. It may not hurt that Umino tried to save Naru from a MonsterOfTheWeek once...by dressing up

as Tuxedo Mask and throwing tempura shrimp at it. Yeeeeah, didn't work. *** Played straight in the manga when Umino takes off his glasses... [[AC:{{Film}}]] * [[Film/{{Zombieland}} Jesse]] [[{{TheSocialNetwork}} Eisenberg]] seems to have made an entire ''career'' out of this trope. * MaggieGyllenhaal in pretty much everything she does, but ''{{Secretary}}'' in particular. ** Kind of HilariousInHindsight, at least to some, in the joke rejected MichaelBay script for ''TheDarkKnight'', quoted at the top of the page, the woman is described as "the Hottest woman in the world". Well, they got the Hottest woman in the world. And then they blew her up. We all know how MichaelBay loves his [[StuffBlowingUp explosions]]. * [[BatmanBegins Dr. Crane]] is a [[MadScientist psychiatrist from hell who conducts creepy experiments]], usually speaks in nerd-ese ("Jungian archetypes" is about as clear as he gets), wears the kind of glasses that Hollywood thinks makes the wearer an enormous nerd, and causes {{fangirl}}s to spontaneously fall into orgasm and [[DracoInLeatherPants take his measurements for leather pants.]] It helps that he's played by CillianMurphy. [[AC:LiveActionTV]] * ''Series/DoctorWho'' as portrayed by David Tennant, known for his Geek Chic suit, tennis sneakers and glasses. He's the first actor to play the role who has so far been popular enough to challenge Tom Baker for the title of ''Best Doctor Ever''. ** Arguably Peter Davison's Doctor as well. ** Lampshaded in the mini-episode "Time Crash" when the Tennant & Davison Doctors meet. Tennant expresses his admiration for Davison (semi-in character), and gushes that he got the idea for wearing glasses he doesn't need just to look smarter from Davison's incarnation. ** Between her science background and her ability to immediately recall the number of lines in a sonnet, Martha Jones is a bit of a geek herself. ** MattSmith's Doctor also qualifies. [[{{Adorkable}} Bowtie and all.]] *** YourMileageMayVary a ''ton'' on that one. Smith's face might be the single biggest BaseBreaker in ''Who'' history. **** Mileage or no, tell me [[http://i986.photobucket.com/albums/ae341/curearainyday/doctorwhoabsu rdlygorgeous.jpg this shot]] isn't the most adorably gorgeous picture of Eleven ''ever''. Jesus Christ, Matt! *** "Bowtie and all?" [[EspeciallyZoidberg ESPECIALLY]] [[BowtiesAreCool the bowtie!]] ** Oh, my god. David freaking Tennant. He was my first celebrity crush, and i have TONS of pitures of him in my room. I even asked for him for my birthday. Sadly, no Tennant. [[{{Squee}} But he's still an adorable, skinny, little, Scottish thing.]] * ''ProjectRunway Season 5''. {{Two Words|ObviousTrope}}: Leanne

Marshall. ** And to kick it up a notch: Diana Eng from Season Two. Girl actually used the words 'rotating polarity' in a dead serious context on a fashion runway. A guaranteed cute nerd girl first. *** Not to mention that when the girl gets liquor in her...she becomes ''Dirty Diana.'' * ''{{Smallville}}'''s Chloe Sullivan definitely falls under this trope. Also helped by the fact that the main LoveInterest doubles as TheWesley and the actress playing Chloe is ''at worst'' HollywoodHomely. ** Seriously, the actress has made it onto one or two "Hottest 100 celebrities," lists. Not bad for a supporting actress on ''{{Smallville}}''. ** Not to mention, she's one of the best characters of the entire show (that says something, trust me). She almost became a CanonImmigrant into the comics, but they just couldn't find a way to fit her in there. ** Allison Mack also [[ActorAllusion does the voice]] for [[MostCommonSuperpower Power Girl]] in the animated Superman/Batman: Public Enemies movie. Hot. * ''{{The X-Files}}''. GillianAnderson became the pin-up of choice for straight male (and [[BiTheWay bisexual]]/gay female) nerds everywhere. David Duchovny did the same for the ladies and gay/bi men. ** In their own words (or Scully's rather), from the episode "War of the Coprophages": "Smart is sexy." * [[GoodEats Alton Brown]]. [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TIf2Z6RsaA No, really.]] * The ''MythBusters''. [[MsFanservice Kari]] [[strike: included]] especially. ** You're not mentioning [[AsianAndNerdy Grant]]... ** Or Adam Savage for that matter. * [[http://users1.ml.mindenkilapja.hu/users/icarlyfan/uploads/nathan_kress_1229166156.png Nathan Kress,]] who plays major tech geek Freddie Benson on ''{{iCarly}}'', is, well... just look at the picture. * No love for [[CriminalMinds Dr. Spencer Reid?]] ** ''So'' much love for Dr Reid. This troper's ''mother'' is in love with him, such is his nerdish sexiness. ** [[http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Rgk1LCaY7_Y/SIp2qIHuXbI/AAAAAAAAEms/hi5kLK IacxU/s1600-h/agentprovocateur22_wenn1934489.jpg Well, these ladies seem to agree with your mother.]] * Okay, so he's a pscho- sorry, high functioning sociopath, but would it be too much to mention a certain [[{{Sherlock}} Mr Holmes]] as played by a certain [[BenedictCumberbatch Mr Cumberbatch]]? Aside from the fact that he's ''very'' pretty, his innate ability to know ''everything'' is a huge GeekyTurnOn for more than a few Cumberbitches. [[AC:VideoGames]] * Nerdy to the core, being both an [[HotScientist engineer]] AND an anime otaku, Otacon of the ''MetalGear'' series is a profoundly

[[TheWoobie woobie]] fan favorite. He swaps out his glasses for contacts halfway through ''Metal Gear Solid 4'', but since he does so for such an endearingly nerdy reason (a pretty girl told him to!) this doesn't bother many people (it helps that a big part of his character development is [[spoiler: swapping the contacts back for glasses]]). With his glasses on, it should be noted that [[NotBloodSiblings even his step-sister wants a piece of him]]. ** The Sorrow may be a little creepy, but if [[{{Badass}} The Boss]] gave birth to his child, he must be one sexy, sexy man. *** That depends, are you a fan torture, revolvers, and {{Chronic Backstabbing Disorder}}? Then you'll love Ocelot. ** And on that subject, how can we forget the main cast of ''MetalGearSolid 3''? [[EvenTheGuysWantHim Naked Snake]] [[spoiler:(a.k.a. Big Boss)]] geeks out over guns, food, face paints and uniforms, and [[MythologyGag cardboard boxes]]; Para-medic is a ''huge'' movie buff, and is constantly trying to encourage Snake to watch movies; Sigint is obsessed with technology and advanced weapons; and Major Zero loves WorldWarII and JamesBond films, as well as tea. * [[HalfLife Dear Gordon]], please become real so we can ride off into the sunset solving physics problems and shooting bad guys together. Sincerely, crazed fangirl. P.S. Bring Barney too. [[AC:{{Music}}]] * Lupe Fiasco. Just listen to some of his songs heck, his [[LupinIII stage name]] alone is a dead giveaway. * John Linnell of TheyMightBeGiants, for some. * And John Flansburgh!!! This is made especially evident when you watch clips from early in their career, when Flans was sort of ridiculously buff and didn't wear his glasses for live performances. He actually looks [[YourMileageMayVary much worse]] than he does with a little fluff and with those adorkable glasses... heart. * BuddyHolly. * "Nerdy Boys" by Candypants. -->Just four little eyes and I'm weak in the knees -->I want to live his junior high fantasies -->Just one giant brain and I'm his unopened toy -->I'm just a sucker for a nerdy boy * TaylorSwift in her role as the nerdy band girl in the video for "You Belong With Me." * The whole band of Ludo. Just...all of them. [[AC:WebComics]] * Florence Ambrose from ''{{Freefall}}'' - so much it '''[[IfYouKnowWhatIMean trascends species.]]''' [[AC:WebOriginal]] * Marina Orlova, host of the popular YouTube channel [=HotForWords=]. In her videos she explains the etymology behind English words and idioms while exploiting the fact that she's a blonde bombshell for all it's worth. Her videos begin with the tagline "Intelligence is Sexy". * ThatGuyWithTheGlasses. Whether you like [[HollywoodNerd hot, geeky girls]], [[{{Meganekko}} cute guys in glasses]] or just have a

[[RuleThirtyFour taste]] for [[DeadpanSnarker snark]], there's a little something for everyone. ** It's worth noting that, contrary to the [[NerdsAreVirgins negative stereotype]], many of the contributors of Channel Awesome are either HappilyMarried or in stable romantic relationships. ** The AngryVideoGameNerd also qualifies. ** [[@/{{Cuchulainn}} This troper]] hasn't even watched any of her videos yet(only just discovered the site), and wants to get with TheNostalgiaChick. * LisaFoiles. Yes, [[MalcolmInTheMiddle Malcolm's]] female opposite is a [[http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/top-5-with-lisa-foiles total nerd...]] And hot. [[AC:WesternAnimation]] * ''TheAmazingSpiez'' has [[BadassBookworm Marc]], who despite not being as girl-crazy as Lee or Tony, has twice as many preteen fangirls as either one of them. [[AC:RealLife]] * Hannah Arendt. She even gave the enthusiastically Nazi Martin Heidegger MatzoFever. * TinaFey. She's arguably several times hotter with her glasses ''on'', and I don't know why. * [[http://www.angryflower.com/dating.gif Dr. Fotini MarkopoulouKalamara!]] * [[http://www.hyreviews.com/Seth%20Myers%20and%20Bill%20Hader,%20croppe d.jpg Seth Meyers and Bill Hader]], SNL's resident dreamboats. They write comic books. Case closed. * After single-handedly winning the 2009 series of ''UniversityChallenge'' for Oxford's Corpus Christi College (till they got disqualified for fielding an ineligible player in the final), [[http://www.independent.co.uk/multimedia/archive/00137/gailtrimble_137993s.jpg Gail Trimble]] got asked to do a "tasteful" photoshoot for lad's mag ''Zoo''. She declined the offer. ** More recently, Alex Guttenplan and Gilead Amit, the captains of Emmanuel College Cambridge and Imperial College London respectively received this sort of treatment as well. * Masi Oka. Fluent in three languages, does charity work for One Laptop Per Child, has a BS in Computer Science from Brown, was nominated for an Emmy, is a former programmer/computer animator for Lucasfilm, and pretty darn sexy. * Danica [=McKellar=]. Remember Winnie from ''TheWonderYears''? She graduated summa cum laude from UCLA, majoring in mathematics, coauthored a scientific paper and has her name attached to the "Chayes[=McKellar=]-Winn theorem". And judging from the covers for her books "Math Doesn't Suck" and "Kiss My Math"(aimed at middle-school girls to encourage math proficiency), she's still pretty damn attractive. [[http://www.imdb.com/media/rm2645395712/nm0005211 Here's a recent picture for any doubters]]. * StephenColbert. The man plays DungeonsAndDragons and was given the shield of Captain America! He was also into ''TheLordOfTheRings''

decades before it was made into movies. * MaggieGyllenhaal [[http://www.filmweb.no/bilder/multimedia/archive/00098/Maggie_Gyllenh aal_i__98612o.jpg]], ZooeyDeschanel [[http://www.zooeydeschanel.us/gallery/zooey-deschanel-1g.jpg]], JudyGreer [[http://images2.redbubble.net/img/art/size:large/view:main/2806844-2-evell-choosejudy-greer.jpg]], AmberBenson [[http://crushingclams.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/amber-benson31.jpg]], MelanieLynskey ([[UsefulNotes/NewZealand Kiwi nerd!]])...[[http://www.celebwelove.com/Melanie_Lynskey/melanielynskey01.jpg]] * LoadingReadyRun's [[http://loadingreadyrun.com/img/crew/kathleen.jpg Kathleen De Vere]] has garnered a fair bit of attention from the Escapist series "ENN". When she neglected to wear a camisole and leaned over the news desk back in March 2010, the most of which concerned her cleavage. The Escapist amended their forum guidelines to ban discussion of contributers' "physical features" the very next day. She has an extremely sexy voice? * FeliciaDay * DavidTennant. About as nerdy as they come. * [[JenniferJasonLeigh Jennifer. Jason. Leigh.]] * SethGreen. ''[[HeartSymbol Siiiigh...]]'' ** ''So'' seconded. While [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_eJmYKN_1QE this parody of California Girls]] is definitely aimed at those interested in women, this straight female troper constantly rewatches it to see [[BuffyTheVampireSlayer Oz]] rap about HarryPotter, LordOfTheRings, Series/DoctorWho, and his love of geek girls. *melts* * VinDiesel is a big D&D fan. * NataliePortman. She skipped out on the premiere of ''StarWars Episode I'' in order to study for her [=SATs=]. * JeffGoldblum. ''[[HeartSymbol Rawwwwrr...]]'' * GuinevereTurner * ParkerPosey * KarlUrban * EllenPage. See Kitty Pryde, above. * AmyAdams. Being a [[HeroesWantRedheads redhead]] helps. * [[http://www.gk2gk.com/ This]] is a dating-website...for geeks. * Matthew Gray Gubler. Dear God, ''Matthew Gray Gubler''. * ZacharyQuinto talks about existentialism, Jack Keroauc, is almost pretentiously verbose, is a lifelong AngelsInAmerica fan, quotes obscure Shakesphere quotes in interviews (without mentioning he's quoting Shakesphere) and all together seriously impressed this English nerd troper. * JamesFranco has a degree in English from UCLA and he's going to Yale for his Ph.D. * While not as modern as the above examples, the gorgeous Hedy Lamarr was responsible for early spread spectrum techniques. You know, when she wasn't acting in every major movie in the 40's. * DolphLundgren has a Master's degree in Chemical Engineering, and one of his most famous roles was playing ''HeMan'' in an 80s movie adaptation.

** And he was also part of the Kustjgarna, Swedish Coastal Rangers. ** So ... he has a [[{{IncrediblyLamePun}} Master's of the Universe]]? * {{Cracked}} gives us [[http://www.cracked.com/article_15753_8celebrities-you-didnt-know-were-geeks.html 8 Celebrities You Didn't Know Were Geeks]]. Everyone on the list is notably very attractive. * Does JhonenVasquez qualify as a nerd? Because... just... ''[[http://www.flickr.com/photos/eecue/1865784255/ yeah.]]'' * [[http://www.lastexittonowhere.com/media/uploads/blog/Ed_Byrne.jpg Ed Byrne]], [[http://www.independent.co.uk/multimedia/archive/00423/36_SimonAmstel_423869s.jpg Simon Amstell]]. Why are nerdy comedians so damn SEXY? * While [[Tropers/{{Smerf}} this]] nerdy troper knows several hot nerds, he is not one of them. * This troper is on Honor Roll, has an above average IQ (114 last time she checked) and is looking into getting glasses ([[RuleOfCool like she needs them]]), yet she'll sometimes catch boys [[MaleGaze staring at her]] in gym class. Last week, someone [[DistractedByTheSexy ran into a wall while staring at her.]] * RosarioDawson. Extremely hot and extremely nerdy. * Jessica "[[MetroidOtherM Samus Aran]]" Martin. Ditto for Kjerstine Anderson, her co-star in Book-It Repertory Theatre's 2011 play of ''SenseAndSensibility''. * TwoWords: Barack Obama. This from a ''male Republican''. * ChloeSevigny * This Tumblr: [[http://hotguysreadingbooks.tumblr.com/ you're welcome]]. * [[TheRachelMaddowShow Rachel Freaking Maddow]]. Yes, Rachel, [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OeW2Rx6DENU u shud totally has ride on Air Force One!]] *grumblegrumblestupidcuteadorable'''taken'''politicalpunditsgrumble* * SarahPolley. Almost like the Canadian counterpart to FeliciaDay, [[{{Dissimile}} except shorter, blonde, and more buxom]]. But every bit as much of a nerd! * Ryan Buell from Paranormal State. * Apparently im this O_o i dont see the "hot" part at all, one day i got told "You don't look like someone who would be into Adventure Time, Futurama, Memebase, TV Tropes, and playing Black Ops" i replied "Well, why??" the reply was "Your to well dressed/pretty"... i dont see the pretty-ness at all

---Go back to NerdsAreSexy and drool some more. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NerdsAreVirgins When you add examples here, please make sure that they are indeed an example of the trope and that their contents follow the Wiki's general guidelines with regards to

[[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/family_friendly.php Family Friendliness]]. Don't add yourself as a "subversion" or "aversion", unless it's a follow-up of the trope originally being played straight. There are tropes about [[IfYouKnowWhatIMean lucky]] nerds as well (NerdsAreSexy, GiveGeeksAChance, GeekyTurnOn, etc). And if the primary reason for the (assumed) virginity isn't linked to nerdiness, it's not this trope either. If you want to make detailed observations about the trope and how it applies in RealLife, you can use the [[Analysis/NerdsAreVirgins Analysis page]] for those. Also, please make sure that your entry has some meat on its bones. Just adding "me too" doesn't do a lot to illustrate the trope. ---[[foldercontrol]] [[folder:Signed Examples]] [[Tropers/JChance I]] was a virgin until the age of 22, mostly thanks to hangups of my own, even through one relationship, and aided by at least one case of (mutual!) ObliviousToLove, and various incidents of plain bad luck. (including said relationship being ended days after, while apart, deciding I was ready) I ended up marrying the woman who actually took my virginity, [[DomesticAbuse rather foolishly]]. Subsequent to our divorce, I have been [[EthicalSlut making up for lost time]]. [[/folder]] [[folder:Anonymous Examples]] * The fact that this trope exists is the reason this troper goes out of his way to hide his nerdy interests from any dates he has. * This troper is a thirty year-old virgin because he spent high school and college studying, and afterwords almost never left his house except for work and nerdism. * This 19 year old female troper is single and not getting any, and the reason is this: I need to literally be intimidated by how smart a guy is in order to be attracted to him. Which sucks, because at my school, I have yet to meet anyone who is both single and extremely intelligent (without being an InsufferableGenius). My friends constantly prod me to just jump on the next dumb-but-cute guy who hits on me, but the thing is, without the GeekyTurnOn, there's just not much there - not to mention that I'm notoriously bad at picking up signals and noticing flirtation in the first place. * This (also 19 year-old) troper is admittedly quite nerdy, and a self-confessed anime fangirl, and while she has actually been on the recieving end of male attention a couple of times, has never actually had a boyfriend. While the fact that she's gotten male interest before probably suggests she is actually capable of getting lucky, she's so

painfully shy that she's never had the courage to actually act on it. * Hi, 21-year-old virgin here. Anime fan, quite intelligent, among other things that would peg me, usually a normal girl, as a nerd. The only reason I haven't lost my virginity is because I'm waiting for "Mr. Special" or "Sir Who Deserves It" and I don't want to regret it. It sounds like a silly reason, but after hearing some stories from my friends who regretted their first times, I refuse to "go out like that", if you'd pardon the colloquialism. * 23 years old this year (2011). Reasons for still being one (1) This troper is Catholic (2) Waiting for "Ms Right". To the tropette above, this troper totally agree with you, that it should be given to the one "who deserves it" and it is not a dumb idea. [[/folder]] ---Even going back to the [[NerdsAreVirgins main page]] won't [[YouNeedToGetLaid get you laid.]] ----

NeverBringAKnifeToAFistFight * A guy tried to rob the clothing store next door to our card shop and two of the Magic the Gathering players are Marines rushed out hearing the screams. The robber's knife might as well been a feather as he was disarmed in seconds before eating asphalt. The other Marine just didn't bother putting his soda down watching the ass kicking. * This troper once easily stopped a drunk guy, who got psychotic and violent, and pulled out his knife. He almost stabbed one of my friends in the neck, his girlfriend pulled him back at the last moment, so he got only a long scratch. At this point I got really pissed, gave this psycho a bone-crunching bear "hug" (I'm a huge and strong guy, almost 6'10" and 320 lbs), then lifted him in the air and slammed at floor, knocking him out for almost 10 minutes. Needless to say, he was no longer welcome in our company. * This is my gimmick in my swordsmanship classes. Everyone else is focused on slashes. I usually just beat the blade upward, shoulder check them off ballance, scrape my boot heel down their shins and disarm them.It also helps that when I do cut someone, I have the strongest cut in the group, including instructors. If you're going into swordsmanship, then you may as well study the book of 5 rings and be a strategist.

NeverGotToSayGoodbye * [[TheGreatUnknown This troper]] knows that...his father suffered a fatal heart attack just as they were about to leave the local pool when he was ten years old. -->'''Troper''': Time to go home now? -->'''Dad''': Yeah. ** DEAR GOD! ** * HUG* ** ...Thank you.

* This Troper has a non-death one. It was the day after our middle school graduation and the day of a school picnic, and a friend of mine and I went to the school one last time (even though I absolutely hated the school and most of the people there) before we went to different high schools in different parts of SoCal. While I was off getting more food at the cafeteria, my friend left the school to go to a party and she didn't say good-bye to me. I was pissed, and now, looking back, it's sad I didn't say good-bye before she went to the party. * ThisTroper had one good friend at elementary school, which was a feat since she was a ShrinkingViolet and often [[AllOfTheOtherReindeer bullied by other children]] for her social awkwardness and top grades. At some point, the girl and her parents took the little troper out for dinner and a movie, and she happily took it in stride not noticing anything weird. Few days later, she was told that her best and almost only friend had moved abroads. * Happened when this troper's grandmother died suddenly in hospital. The troper was ridden with guilt because she'd used a bad cold as an excuse to avoid visiting granny, whom she could not bring herself to watch suffering. * Similar to the above, this troper's grandmother was in the hospital. He and his father were going to visit her because his parents thought it would be nice for him to see her, but the hospital visit got canceled (can't remember why). That weekend his Shakespeare class took a field trip, and when he got back he learned that she had died. ** this troper had a similar issue with her grandmother's death. only being just barely 10 at the time her parents were still overly protective and didn't let her visit her grandmother for the last 10 days she was alive because the state her grandma was in was pretty bad (the cancer got bad because her medications masked some of the major symptoms that would have allowed an early diagnosis). it was on the day she was going to be finally allowed to see her that her grandma died, only half an hour before she actually got there. even tho she was far less close to her other grandmother she made sure to give a proper goodbye and see her as often as possible when her end was nearing to try and make up for failing to say goodbye to her other grandma. * Similar to the two above, this troper's grandmother died after a long battle with cancer. Unfortunately, he had had the chance to go visit her the night before she died, but begged off (he doesn't like hospitals) citing, of all things, chores that he had to do. It took him a long time to get over that. * This troper one grandfather was missing when he went on an extended vacation in Japan back in the summer of 2002. One week into the trip I found that they found his body washed up on an island. I couldn't get back for the funeral and to this day this troper still feels a bit sad that he didn't say good bye. * Once this troper's best friend was drowned in a pool when he was abroad. * This troper's best friend once moved away without a word. Well, she assumes she moved away, as the next day, neither the girl nor her siblings appeared at school, the phone was disconnected, the house was empty... she's assuming either the father's mental illness or the

witness protection program. * This troper's beloved dog passed away right before winter finals her first year of college, and she wasn't told about it until she got home. Even now (several years later), though she understands her parents' rationale in keeping the news from her, she's still depressed that she never got to say goodbye. He was a ''hell'' of a good dog. * This is a common occurrence for military brats whose parents become more geographically mobile as they become more upwardly mobile. At least for this troper, the regret is blunted with frequency, so even remembering those who've died isn't any worse than remembering those who've simply moved away; both are never heard of again. * This troper's grandfather attended church on Sunday morning, for the first annual Blessing of the Animals worship service. He told the pastor it was the best service he'd ever attended and that the church had "gone to the dogs." Later he had a lovely visit with Troper's husband, who stopped by to deliver groceries on his way home from the supermarket where he worked; Troper couldn't be there owing to illness, but intended to visit him the following afternoon after she got out of work. An hour after Troper's husband left him, Troper's grandfather suffered a massive heart attack and died instantly. This was less than two weeks after his cardiologist gave him a clean bill of health. * A friend of mine in school was suffering from a massive headache and nosebleed on a Friday. He died of either an aneurism or brain tumor that weekend. * Two grandfathers and a grandmother. But the worst was a good friend in high school, who had a genetic heart problem which he barely ever mentioned. I was actually teasing him about it the day he died (kindly) because he was complaining of chest pains. Hearing that news the next morning in school was one of the hardest things ever. Made even worse by my deadpan snark when his cousin heard the news before the rest of us and broke down in tears. She was a drama queen and my first words were 'who died?' There are no words to express how much I want to relive that day. * This troper's father (and by extension, his entire side of the family) haven't spoken to me in about five years. I figured if something ever happened, they'd break that silence (I know I have). I figured wrong. About 6 months ago I got a phone call offering condolences for my grandfather's death. I didn't know he had passed, and found out after the funeral, so not only were we not speaking at the time of his death, I never had the chance for any closure at the funeral. Then both my sister and I were mentioned in the obituary, which stung more. They couldn't claim they'd forgotten us, since they remembered enough to write our names down as relatives. * This troper's grandfather didn't go to the hospital when his grandmother was admitted with an extremely low blood pressure, because he thought she'd bounce back for at least a few more months, like she usually did. Needless to say she passed on the next day at 9 am. * Two years ago, this troper decided that she was going to visit her friend who was struggling with leukemia. She called up the hospital on a Saturday at around noon to hear the nurse say that she passed away only a few minutes before. It took the troper a while before what the

nurse said registered in her brain, then... well... Yeah. * [[AXavierB This troper]] begged to go see his aunt, who had been diagnosed with cancer, at the hospital because the doctors didn't think she would survive, but my grandma wouldn't let me go because it was a school night. When everyone else got back from the hospital, they told me she'd died overnight. * I still half laugh, half cry at the thought that the last words I said to my mum were basically a "Friends" joke related to the use of bath salts (the one where Chandler uses Monica's bath salts and stuff). ** My Grandma died a year later (it was a pretty bad year), having suffered a serious stroke, and spending her last week alive but dead in the hospital (they were keeping her comfortable, but nothing more). My Grandad had spent the entire time at the hospital since she got taken in, and the rest of the family had regularly visited. One evening, for the first time the entire family (she had 7 childen and 5 grandchildren) was together, including some who pretty much hated each other. Once most people had gone, one of my Uncles managed to persuade my Grandad to go home for a few hours, to have a proper bath and get some new clothes and things, leaving just one Uncle there with Grandma. Grandad had barely got home when they got the call to say she had died. ** I seem to have a thing with this trope. I recently lost my other Grandma. I hadn't seen her for quite a while (well over a year) and went over to visit her one Saturday. Just over a week later we got a call to say she had died. I originally wasn't going to visit as I was busy with other things, but decided to at the last minute. Glad I did. * While this troper never met him personally, I was very saddened by a friend he knew online sying by sudden heart attack. He had bene in hospital for some heart problem, but was getting better. Then one day I head from somebody who knew him offline that he had died of heart attack. I can't imagine what it must've been for his family, since he seemed to have been just fine the previous day. * [[{{Kaizykat}} This Troper's]] grandmother passed away suddenly when she was nine. Thankfully, she was able to spend the day before she died with her grandmother. Her grandfather died less suddenly a few years later, but she didn't really spend much time with him before he passed away. Last school year one of her acquaintances (We knew each other on a first name basis, but we didn't hang out much) died instantly in a car crash. Needless to say, this Troper doesn't go to bed angry and doesn't forget to say goodbye to someone. * My best friend, also pastor at our church, was promoted to "deputy bishop" and moved to another continent. Soo after that, we got our first daughter and I asked him to come back to baptize her. He did not have time at that moment, so we said we would delay the baptism for a year for his sake. But before he got time to travel to us, he died, suddenly and unexpectedly, from heart problems at a fairly young age. That happened in 2000 and I still feel pain when I think of it. * When This Troper was very young (6ish) her dad was driving her home from school when he got a phone call from the police. I didn't hear the conversation and when I asked my dad what was wrong he just said "A robber broke in whilst mum was in the house." and nothing else, he

just drove faster. I naturally started to panic and assumed the worst. The first thing that came to mind was "Did I say goodbye to her this morning?" and "When was the last time I said I Love You to her?." I couldn't remember. When we arrived home we were greeted by a police woman and I felt gut wrenching pain thinking that I'd never got to say goodbye but it turned out that the robber hadn't even noticed that she was home. Still, the emotions caused by this incident have caused me to develop a habit to always say goodbye, even if I'm likely to see the person in a couple of hours, and to constantly remind my family that I love them. * This Troper once knew someone from Canada who played in a band she met online years ado. He was suffering from lukemia, so I knew he could go at any time. Srping of 2006...he passed away. I got the news in an e-mail too late. To this day, I regret not retuning to the forum we where on in time to say good bye... * Back in primary (elementary) school, when this troper was 8, he never got so say goodbye he had a crush on. She knew about it and joked about it, but one monday, she said she liked me back. I was off sick the next day. Guess what day also happens to be her last day before suddenly moving away? It took me a good three years to get over it. Dont say its silly, because it meant alot. * Happened to this Troper with her great-grandfather. She was always very close to him, always seeing him when she was little. Then, four-has it really been that long?--years ago, he had a stroke. He didn't die immediately, far from it. She went to see him at the hospital that he was at. Part of his face was numb, and he could barely move. -->'''Grandfather''': "Grandpa's sick, honey, real sick." Those were the last words I ever heard from him. I was so scared, so upset, that I ran out of the room crying. I left the hospital without saying anything to him. Two days later, he passed away. Those words will haunt me to my dying day, and beyond. * The last time this troper ever spoke to her mother, we joked about what my grandma was watching before we came to the hospital. A few days later, my mom fell into a coma and died about a week later, thanks to pneumonia brought on by her chronic lung condition. The worst part? The last month she was alive and still well enough to be at home, we weren't speaking to each other because of an argument. I even stopped hugging her and telling her I loved her before I went to school (I was 17 at the time). Now, I can't even remember what the argument was about, and still haven't gotten over how stupid this was. * This troper's twin sister died of leukemia when were 8. It was late at night; I was asleep. This is one of the many reasons it never, ''ever'' stops hurting. * This troper last conversed with his brother on the messenger, their last exchange of words was in text, lasted less than a minute and ended with: --> Him: "I'm a little busy righ now, so we'll talk later" --> Me: "okay [smiley]" ** This troper had never thought the conversation history feature would be a source for so many tears. * This troper's grandfather lived in India, so I barely got to see him. Even then, we were pretty close, and in all honesty, I wanted to

be just like him and become a doctor. He was diagnosed with late-stage kidney cancer two years ago, but seemed to be handling it well, even looking like he was heading towards remission. I tended to skip the webchats because my mother was better at talking, and I couldn't figure out what to say. Then, last weekend, we got a call saying that he had gone unconscious, and within a few hours, another call saying that he had died. I never got to say how much I loved him and was going to miss him. * This Troper never got a chance to say goodbye to his grandfather, his grandmother, his dad's friend (who was basically my unoffical uncle) and his biology teacher. His grandfather: died while I was in school on the day I had wanted to go see him (he was in hospital). His grandmother: died while I was at school on the day I had wanted to go see her (she had alzimers). My dad's friend: commited suicide the day after him, my dad, my sister and me went out on our fishing boat. My biology teacher: not sure when he died, but I was on study leave preparing for my GCSE's when I heard about it (he hadn't been at school most of the year). The worst part? The last time I saw each of them were the happiest days of my life. I don't mention it in public, as I don't want people's pity, but it still hurts real bad to think about it. No wonder I'm hard to upset now... * I have three. The first is that my grandfather died, and I didn't even know he was sick until I was told he'd died. He had lung cancer and the last time I saw him, he told me he shaved his head because of the summer heat. It was so the chemo wouldn't get to it first. Second, I moved unexpectedly - as in, my father said Mom and I were going to be staying with my grandmother for a week, and then a week later I was enrolled in a new school system, not going home. I was told not to tell anyone I was leaving for a little while... and I never came back. So, I never had a chance to say good-bye to any of my friends. Not one. The third was my aunt. The last time I saw her, she thought she had pneumonia and didn't want to hug/kiss me good-bye in case I caught it. The "pneumonia" was final-stage lung cancer. (No fucking wonder you'll never get me to touch a cigarette.) * There was one person in this Troper's first elementary school that didn't treat her like crap. One. A car ran him over when she was home sick. * [[Tropers/{{Pastylover2}} This Troper's]] mother was killed by a drunk driver in 2008 while we were walking, she was pushing me in my wheelchair. I had just recently had surgery, so the last words I remember saying to her was, "I don't wanna go for a walk today." She didn't listen. * [[Tropers/AndyLA This troper]] remembers better when his uncle died of stomach cancer. It's not really a matter of not saying goodbye, but I refused to accept he would leave me until the very end. Even after I broke out in tears, when I saw him in his last night alive. I just... didn't want to believe it. My dad respected my feelings, took me back home and treated me to pizza. And later on, I didn't even want to go to his funeral. Especially not after I saw his body being taken from the hospital the next morning, already in the coffin. I guess I actually hate farewells. Especially this kind of farewell. * This troper has a double whammy. My father was murdered without me

having a chance to say goodbye the last time I saw him, but worse than that was that my last contact with him was a physical fight started by me. Not only did I not say goodbye, I never got to apologize. * This troper moved away from her family several years ago, and as such rarely got to see her younger siblings. Her brother, who was rather independent, began to come round to visit as he got older, especially as he was friends with one of her neighbours. The last time she saw him was on a Wednesday at the end of May 2009. He was trying to scrounge a bit of money out of her for his lunch, but goodhumouredly, and ended up telling her, "You know you love me really." She sort of responded, "Yeah, yeah," and insisted on hugging him in front of his friends. Bit embarrassing for a seventeen-year-old lad, from his big sister, but he took it well enough and ended up wandering off with them in a group. She thought nothing more of it until the Saturday after, when the police came knocking on her door at eleven p.m... to tell her he'd been hit by a car a couple of hours earlier and died instantly. Naturally, she was devastated, especially when she and her mother were taken to the local morgue later to identify him. About the only thing that makes it even a little easier to think about is the fact that the last meeting between this troper and her brother was affectionate and caring. * Five years ago, on Father's Day, I lost my grandfather, who was a diabetic. He seemed completely normal the night before, since we were all watching TV and having fun together. Well, we all went to bed that night, and I regret not having said ''at least'' "goodnight" to anyone. Before my grandmother got up at 3 to do her daily devotions in the living room, she asked my grandfather if he was ok. His last words to her were, "I'm fine." When she came back an hour later, he was already gone. * I've lost three grandparents to cancer or some kind, my grandfather on my mothers side died when i was four, when i was eight my other grandfather died, i don't remember them much since i was so young but from the stories i was told i would have loved to be with them. when i was 14 or 15 my grandmother on my dad's side passed away, to this day my biggest regret was not talking to her during the entire ordeal. about a year later my uncle on my dad's side passed away, i wasn't really close to him but apparently the woman he was with had taken his phone away during the last few days, my dad didn't know this until a few months after the funeral... * This troper has four examples: ** When I was three, my father had some kind of cancer (not sure which one because the doctor kept misdiagnosing him). I didn't even know he was sick until he died. Understandably, my mother didn't want her children watching a their father, attatched to machines, slowly dying. ** My grandfather made a Facebook account after he got an iPhone. It was a snowy day, but the thing was, classes were cancelled before the snow even started. Me, being the DeadpanSnarker I am, made a joke about how the school board was paranoid. My grandpa joked about them being scared of Yetis. That was the last thing he said to me before he collapsed from a heart attack. His last FB status update was a request for someone to make snowmen. I wish I read that before the funeral. You can see it here:

http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=100000441848254 ** Now that I'm done depressing you, these last two are non-death examples. When I was in second grade, a girl in my class seemed to have a crush on me (that, or at least liked playing with me (no, not THAT way)). We were good friends. But, just out of nowhere, she moved away. She didn't even tell me. UnluckyChildhoodFriend indeed. ** It was graduation. Naturally, I decided to see all my highschool friends off. However, the crowd was too damn big, and I couldn't find everyone. I had to say my last goodbye to them via E-Mail. Technically, the trope is averted, but it would have been better to say goodbye in person. * This troper's (currently) long-distance girlfriend has cancer, and has attempted suicide before. Every single time she logs off and I don't have the chance to say goodbye to her, it hurts, partly just because I didn't get to say goodbye for that night which makes me feel bad anyway, and because I'm terrified that she just might never show up again. * This Troper once had a very special dog, whose intelligence was quite something. He seemed more aware of things than any dog we had before and fiercely protected our home, despite being owned by someone else in our street (one of our dogs was his mother). One day, he came in to the house, wobbling after what was later suspected to be a purposeful strike with a van from a horrid neighbor we had. I had a horrible feeling he was going to die and my brothers berated me for being such a Crybaby. He was brought to the Vets and they confirmed he had serious internal injuries that they just couldn't operate on. However, he was alive for a time after this. My brothers were the only people in the house with access to transportation and the Vet's was too far for me to walk. "We'll go tomorrow", "We'll go tomorrow" I kept hearing; until one morning my mom informed me that they had him put down. Thinking about it both fills me with sadness and bitterness. * this Troper's grandfather fell and went into the hospital mid way through the summer, and she only visited once, because her pen pal and good friend from anther country was visiting the area. on her friends last weekend, they had a sleep over- the next day, grandpa was comming hom. cue this troper's father waking her a six am to tell her, the hospital called, Grandpa's fading, we've got to go now.' we didn't make it in time. i never did tell him goodbye. that afternoon, the friend left, and her email had stopped working while she'd been in the states. so i never got to say good bye to either of them. * A few years ago, this troper's parents decided it was time to have our eighteen-year-old spaniel put to sleep. I couldn't go downstairs to say goodbye to her, that last morning, because I was crying too hard and didn't want her to know how heartbroken I was. * Non-death example: this tropette is homeschooled, and makes most of her friends at a local Boys and Girls Club. One of my best friends there was the computer tech. He was cool, we had all the same interests, and he treated kids like humans. I was home with a leg injury once, thinking of all the awesome things we'd planned to do over the next month-- build a haunted house, hold a video game tournament... I finally came back, and he was taking a "day off". It turned out he quit suddenly without telling anyone. I have been in

turmoil since, wondering if we were really friends or if I was just... another annoying [[JustAKid kid]]... * Non-death: This troper spent a fair deal of her childhood on the countryside or camping all over Europe. She still hasn't gotten over all those friends she would make only to shortly thereafter leave them or see them disappear without getting to say goodbye. Somehow, she was always too late. * I only really had one friend growing up. We met in 8th grade and stayed friends even after high school. She was a troubled soul. (Dysfunctional family, history of abuse, alcohol, drugs) And she had the knack for completely ditching me whenever we were out somewhere to go get drunk. One day, after planning for a month to go see a big movie, she ditched me that day to go to a party and lied about it. I screamed at her for a while over the phone and didn't talk to her again. That was Halloween '09. Christmas '09 I get a call from her Grandma saying she committed suicide. I was the only one she called personally because she knew we were such good friends. I never got to say goodbye, and I never got to say I'm sorry. * I have two, which aren't as dramatic as all these other examples. The first one is that little kitten. I named him Sugar. My sister had rescued him from the road, where he was about to be hit by a car. When we brought him home, my dad got mad. Really mad. He made us take the kitten to the humane league. While my mother was signing the papers, I got distracted and went to pet some of the cats in the cages. A minute later, a woman walked by carrying Sugar in a little carrier, taking him to a cage. I stopped her and put my finger through a gap, and he touched his nose to it. Then she carried him away and we left. Once in the parking lot, I just sat down. And I started sobbing. ** The second one, which happened recently. My friend and I had known each other for four years, and we've never seen each other in person. It was an internet friendship. A while ago, we started fighting and getting angry and sad with each other a lot more than usual. Recently, we had a very explosive fight and we decided that we didn't want to hurt each other any more. We couldn't talk any more, to protect each other. As he was saying his goodbye over Steam, my internet crashed. I still have the log... -->luna: yeah -->luna: but im still really gonna miss you -->luna hugs --> Your state is set to Offline. Lost connection to Steam, will rejoin chat automatically when connection regained. If you read this whole page, go hug someone you love. ---Don't forget to tell us bai bai before you [[Main/NeverGotToSayGoodbye go back to the main article]]. You may regret it if you don't... * Good bye, everyone. * Baaaaaaaaai! * [[TheSoundOfMusic So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, good night!]] * [[TheSoundOfMusic Adieu, adieu, to you and you and you~!]] * Sensei, Sayonara! Minna-san, SAYOUNARA! * ''Adios, muchachos.''

* [[HitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy So long, and thanks for all the fish!]] * [[WorldOfWarcraft May your blades never dull!]] * See you on the other side. * We'll meet again in [[AstridLindgren Nangijala.]] * [[StarWars May the Force be with you!]] * I... I love you all. * AWWW! (squishy hug) * We shall meet again! Ride hard into the hereafter! Let your battlehorns sound far and wide - and we will dine with the Gods themselves! * May the road rise to meet you and the wind always be at your back. * May you find wisdom in your journeys throughout the internet. -{{Freiberg}} * See you Space Cowboy... * Cudense. * Goodbye. .... .... [[{{Portal}} Are you still here?]] * I'll always be here for you, silly! Even if one of us is gone next time we meet, I'll be here for you. * Good day to you. * We'll meet again, don't know where, don't know when, but I know we'll meet again some sunny day. * We will always find each other, no matter what. * Dosvidanya * [[ImGoingToHellForThis See you in hell]]. * Good night you princes of Maine, you kings of New New England. * Live long, and prosper. * [[{{HiHiPuffyAmiYumi}} Bye bye boo!]] * [[{{Megadeth}} tout le monde, tous mes amis, je vous aime, je dois partir. These are the last words I'll ever speak, and they'll set me free...]] * [[CelebrityDeathmatch Good fight, good night!]] * [[DrSlump Bye-nara!]] * See you in the funny papers! * Peace be with you. * Goodbye. OK, bye. OK, bye. Death is not the end. Bye bye. You must go now. End. * Lord willing I'll see you all again. * alloha, the most deep word I'll ever say. * I'll be away laughing on a fast camel. :) * *Waves* * ... [[ToyStory So long, Partner.]] * [[LuckyStar Bye-ni!]] * Don't forget to remember me. * G'bye... * Auf Wiedersehen * Fly you High * Travel Safe, Travel well. May those that have gone before you always be with you. * Good night, and good luck. * Goodbye, everyone, [[SpongebobSquarepants I'll remember you all in therapy!]]

* I love you guys, all. Goodbye, friends... * [[GratuitousJapanese Matane!]] ---<<|TroperTales|>>)

NeverHeardThatOneBefore * This troper is a juggler, and words cannot begin to describe how tired he is of "You have a lot of/big balls" jokes. * ThisTroper's nickname is Trip, a rare but not unique name for a person who is a third as in father and grandfather have the same name (triple, trip, get it?) Puns now come as a BerserkButton, from "Don't trip!" to "Don't be triping" to "Have a nice trip!" Seriously, 10 % of the time someone makes a pun when I first meet them, and 30 % if I know them for a week... If the opportunity arises, they use it. ** You get many ''[[StarTrekEnterprise Enterprise]]'' jokes? * Yes, I know, switching majors from Computer Science to English Literature is a big change. Why would I bother changing to, say, an engineering department if Computer Science wasn't working out? * This Troper's name is Nick, and has vowed never to date someone named Nikki... again. ** Same here. We got sick of the Nic and Nick jokes. * I have a friend whose last name is Mann. Occasionally upon seeing him, I start singing "Suffragette City" by DavidBowie. "Hey, Mann, oh, leave me alone..." [[SubvertedTrope He still thinks it's funny.]] * [[@/RedneckRocker I]] had a friend years ago named Richard, and his older brother was named Keith. Surprisingly, barely anybody made any references to this (partially because at the school I attended, the only music people knew about was from the last five years). On the other hand, I will either beat somebody like a crying child in a department store, or make them run like prune taste-testers with a stomach virus if I have to hear any more quotes from HomeAlone about my name. (Although actually, that hasn't occurred in nearly 14 years, so . . . I can let it go). * [[@/{{Indigo}} This Troper]] ''has'' one of the names listed in the main article, and refuses to answer to it anymore. People not only refuse to respect a polite request to ''not'' make the joke every time the name is mentioned, they become offended she doesn't find the joke amusing; even after explaining she's heard the joke since she was 12 years old and it wasn't even funny then. Until she came up with something else she'd prefer to be called, she had to react like joking about her name was a BerserkButton to get people to stop doing it. ** This troper also has a younger sibling whose first name is Kristal. She had to throw a fit to prevent her mother giving her the middle name "Claire" to avoid this sort of thing. ** ...this troper's preferred name of address tends to get a certain sequence from ''ThePrincessBride'' quoted at her, but she doesn't mind that at all; it's one of her favourite movies. *** Huh. Inigo Montoya is a weird name for a girl :P * One branch of relatives I have all share the last name "Beers". They're positively sick of all the jokes that are made from that. ** Diamonds, right?

* I once knew a fellow with the last name "Hyman". You can imagine the kind of jokes he had to suffer... ** I'm Dutch and one of my former teachers French was called Hyman. Hij man roughly translates from Dutch to English as 'he man'. The irony? She's female. * Perhaps a Real-Life aversion isn't the most appropriate thing, but being as I am the only Willis I've ever met (aside from my father), I don't understand how I made it through life without ever being asked [[DiffrentStrokes what I was talking about]]. It helps that from high school onward, I started going by "Will" instead. * This coming from someone who had to suffer the endless stream of "(Blank) the Dick" jokes. Rick, Mick, Vick, etc. For that matter, guys named Richard probably get similar treatment. Part of the IncrediblyLamePun trope. ** Yes... ''dear sweet mercy'', do men named Richard have this problem. Most of us introduce ourselves with our preferred nicknames for that very reason. *** I pity Richard Head. **** Actually, this troper's father and a friend of her brother's/the neighbour kid don't mind it. We used to call them Big Dick and Little Dick to differentiate. "Little Dick" often has his friends say "Have you seen my Dick?" to other friends, and finds it amusing. ***** This troper's father only lets his parents and sister call him Dick and Dicky. [[RetiredBadass He is scary enough that no one else tries.]] ***** This troper's mother knew a man named 'Harry Richard.' ***** My father worked with Dick Johnson. His nickname was "Redundant". ** I've done lazier. This troper's friend is named Chris, and the only thing I can rhyme it with is Piss. Therefore, [[IncrediblyLamePun Chris the Piss]]. * ThisTroper knew someone by the name of Michael Hunt. Woe betide anyone who called him ''Mike''. ** This Troper's last name is Rutch. A solemn vow never to name a child Michael has been taken. *** ThisTroper is deadly serious when he mentions that he went to a school with a Michael Hawk. He also knows a Harold Schlang. *** On the topic of Mikes, This Troper started getting very annoyed one semester when apparently the entire rest of the student body started thinking it was hilarious that one Mike's last name was "Litt." It was only (slightly) bearable because he didn't get it at the time, but ''no one'' would let it die. The fact that the poor guy was running for a high student government position didn't help. * I share my first name with the crab from ''TheLittleMermaid''. Because the first letter of my surname begins with an S, I always include my middle name when I give my initials, because you'd be amazed how many people invoke GodwinsLaw the moment they hear the phrase "[[ThoseWackyNazis SS]]". ** Please, oh please tell me your middle name is Oscar. ** It makes ''me'' think of souped-up Chevys... * TruthInTelevision for [[@/TheAdversary me]]. "Angel". I've heard both the sincere ones when I do [[PetTheDog good things]] and the

ironic ones when I do [[ShootTheDog morally gray]] to [[KickTheDog bad]] ones. Whatever I do, I get a HurricaneOfPuns. ** I'll remember never to ask you about happy clauses or [[OurVampiresAreDifferent sunlight and wooden stakes]]. ** This troper knows a guy named Angel too. Since no one where I live knows squat about [[BuffyTheVampireSlayer Buffy]], they just make cracks about the fact that it's a girl name [[GenderBlenderName (As he'd tell you, IT'S UNISEX!)]]. [[FunnyAneurysmMoment And then he came out of the closet.]] * People have an odd tendency to start singing Scarborough Fair whenever they hear one troper's name, especially the chorus ''"Parsley, Sage, '''Rosemary''' and Thyme..."'' ** Looove grows where my Rosemary goes...-flees** And just wait until you have a baby... *** [[SarcasmMode Yeah]], NeverHeardThatOneBefore either. Including variations of "Just remember, protect your baby." * This troper has a name which prevents her from eating apples in peace. [[IncestIsRelative Her cousin, six days younger than her, is named Adam. It wasn't planned.]] She has found that wearing snake jewelry helps deflect the idiocy. ** You could also point out that it probably wasn't an apple. * This troper's last name is "Daly", and jokes about newspapers have never, ever been funny. Or anything else done daily. Also, while my name is longish and Welsh, it is pronounced (like nearly all ancient languages) exactly phonetically, and nobody can ever, ever say it right the first time. But the thing that has truly become a BerserkButton for me is that I have dual citizenship -- British and American. My American friends have taken to saying some variation of, "It's because you're British" whenever I do ''absolutely anything'' remotely out of the ordinary, say something slightly strange, or even just whenever they feel like it. It's gotten to the point that, while I am proud of my heritage, anyone uttering the beginning of that phrase gets yelled at and/or hit peremptorily. Apologies can be tendered later if necessary. * This Troper is a first aider/EMT, and there are always a few comedians who stop outside her post and pretend to have heart attacks. It was funny the first time. Your impression is ''not'' the first time. * There are remote African tribesmen who will put to death any man found uttering "Jesus saves. ...Everyone else takes full damage." ** Jesus saves on a 2+ . * Preemptive strike to avoid this: Michael Fox changed his middle initial from A to J to prevent jokes along the lines of "Michael's A Fox." * This troper had heard "Amelia Bedilia" one too many times back in elementary school. She thought it was over until her friends started a short conversation about it at lunch one time. She also plays the double bass, which invokes similar responses to the example at the top of the page (it varies between violin and flute, mostly) and she's also tired of people staring and pointing at her as she walks around the school hallways and asking her if it's heavy when she carries it around. DON'T ASK THAT IF YOU'RE NOT GONNA OFFER TO CARRY IT FOR ME!

My sister's name is Stella. She has been called Stellaluna in elementary school. More recently: Stella Bella (for some reason) and STEEEELLLLAAAAAAAAAAAA! ** My sister in law is named Stella, and became tired of A Streetcar Named Desire before ever seeing it. * This troper's name is Katie Holmes. Tom Cruise jokes have never been funny. I would spite my parents, but the actress...wasn't an actress when I was born, so they didn't know any better. My mother's name is also Lois, and to her, Clark Kent jokes have never been funny, either. * This troper's last name is [=McDonald=]. No, I don't have a farm, and no, you cannot have fries with that. * This Troper's last name is Howe. Many times has he been the recipient of the phrase, "<firstname>, Howe are you doing?" Admittedly, this is mostly done by his friends to screw with him, so they are fully aware he HAS heard it one hundred times before. * An interesting cross-cultural example. My friend lives with some Polish people and a Spaniard named Alphonse Jesus. As "Alfons" is Polish for 'pimp', they call him Jezus (pronounced Jeh-zoos, as Polish for you know who). The funniest thing is, that he wouldn't object if not those nasty evil Poles. * The standard response to anyone seeing or meeting AliceCooper in real life is, apparently, [[WaynesWorld "We are not worthy!"]] Alice himself has gone on the record saying that it's better than what people ''used'' to call out to him, based on one of his album titles... "Hey, Stoopid!" * This troper's last name is Goodall. There is a small mass grave building up in his backyard of people who have asked him whether he is ''good all the time.'' ** How're the gorillas? * Runs and hides* *** You know...that's one that's barely used. You may live. ''For now.'' *** Chimps, she studied chimps! * This troper's last name is "Curley." Yes, I've noticed that my hair is straight, and if you ask about Larry and Moe, ''I WILL DESTROY YOU.'' ** How about Lennie and George? (from "Of Mice and Men"). * This troper was on the Von Braun team at Space Camp. Whenever she mentions that to anybody, they quote Tom Lehrer. She has a sneaking suspicion that the councilors are fully aware of this and only name teams that because he originated the idea of Space Camp. ** Wow, that many people are familiar with Tom Lehrer? Surprising. * This troper is going to cut the next bitch who calls her Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm. Or Becky, for that matter, but that's [[BerserkButton another trope]]. And the team she follows has a thing for this, too, of which the most egregious example is 'Whatchu talkin' about, Willis?' when [[http://www.wnba.com/playerfile/lisa_willis/index.html this player]] scores. * This troper has a hit out on [[CharlesInCharge Scott Baio]], and thinks George and William are perfectly good names for the Crown Prince of the UK. * This troper's first name is Robin, and was tormented with Batman and Robin Hood jokes as a child. Now pretty much anyone who makes the same

joke gets a growled 'don't call me that' as a response. And that's one of the LESS annoyed responses. ** JChance: Preach it. Usually more of a profound eyeroll than a growl for me, but, yes, that one got old in grade school. Also add (in business calls) "Is Robin there? Can I talk to her?" Also add that my last name, despite being longish and Scottish, is spelled phonetically and still no one can pronounce it on the first go. ** This troper and his friend (both called a variation on the name Robin) have had ''very'' bitchy discussions about this. All those jokes stopped being funny very quickly, if they were ever funny at all. Our 'top' four are Batman, birds, Robin Hood and stealing (robbin'. HAHAHAHA). This troper has bemoaned the fact that no-one has ever made a Reliant Robin or Robben Island joke, because they'd at least be imaginative and fresh. ** How's WinnieThePooh? *dashes off*. ** I knew someone from school whose name was Robin Marks. Guess what he got accused of doing a lot. *** Leaving three-toed footprints in the snow? * A non-name example - anyone noticeably taller than their companions has already heard "How's the weather up there?" more times than they care to remember. This would probably bug us more if not for the fact that we're fairly sure that everyone else is just jealous. ** I eventually just started spitting on them and said "It's raining" ** This troper got tired quickly of being asked if he played basketball solely because of his height. *** "No. Do you play miniature golf?" * This troper's new roommate has the last name of "Doodah." For serious. She is surprisingly good-natured about the constant stream of people whistling "Camptown Races" around her. * This troper's first name is Shane. Yes, I am aware of just about an entire rhyming dictionary's worth of words that rhyme with Shane. Yes, I have heard people ask me to [[{{Shane}} "Come Back, Shane!"]]. Yes I am aware it is easy to confuse with Sean. It doesn't help that my middle name lends itself to to many drunken Irish jokes and my last name sounds like a certain buzzing insect and/or a particular character on {{Transformers}}. Sigh. What were my parents on when they decided to name me, I ask you? * You all think you have problems? When this troper was in third grade the Prime Dog Food people started a new ad campaign raising a puppy on Prime Dog Food. They named it Margo - yes this troper's name is Margo and she was the Prime Puppy for THREE whole grades! Needless to say she has never used Prime Dog Food. * And then there's my friend Luke. Once Luke went to one of those restaurants where they take your order then announce when it's ready over an intercom. In Luke's case what he heard was 'Luuuuke - I am your father!' * InsectGenderBender always [[ItJustBugsMe really bugs me]]. ** [[IncrediblyLamePun Pun intended?]] * Real life aversion? Sure, the other guy did it. Somehow I rarely get any whatever Trevor jokes, and my brother rarely get jokes regarding his initials, which are B.S. by the way. ** Lucky you. Back when [[http://www.weebls-stuff.com/toons/magical+ trevor/ Magical Trevor]] first came out, I can't tell you how many

people would start singing that song once they learned my name. * This troper is subject to something else (no one can ever spell her name right and friends love coming up with ridiculous nicknames), but she often teases her brother by comparing him to a [[SpongebobSquarepants certain pink starfish]]. She's the only one he really gets it from, but it annoys the hell out of him when she pats him on the head and says "Pats for Patrick!" ** Variation averted: Same troper, but amazingly enough, despite the fact she and her brother are red-heads, they almost never get the usual red-head nicknames (including the confusing "carrot-top") except when people say "You must get called carrot-top a lot." Maybe people assume they hear it a lot, and figure [[BerserkButton it will end up with them as a bloody heap on the ground.]] * If you know someone afflicted with the name 'Tom Jones', please do ''not'' assure them that said name is "not unusual". It will not end well. * Averted/Inverted? This troper calls his friends by weird variations on their names, which they've just accepted because they've heard them a thousand times. His circle of friends includes such folks as Davidinov, Davidistan, Matthias/Mattibald/JazzBand, and the Jerms. * I'm Thomas, and I will pistolwhip the next guy who mentions tank engines. ** Is it safe to mention [[MegaMan robots?]] ** How about doubting? (This troper is also a Thomas, and got that a few times...) * Yes my name is German, no that doesn't mean I am, your name is David that doesn't result in me asking if you're from the middle east now does it? ** This Troper's last name means "German" in his native language. Godwin's Law gets invoked quite a lot, though usually as means to [[BerserkButton annoy him]], rather than to joke about it. * This troper suffers from partial deafness and when meeting new people has to explain that he does so that they'll talk at him rather than to him. Invariably the words "I'm deaf" will be met with a quickly uttered "What?" and a self-satisfied 'how funny am I?' grin. Depending how drunk he is this troper usually replies with a loud "haha, do you dance in front of cripples too?" or a straight punch in the mouth. ** In everyone's defense: I was once confronted with this situation (being told by a person "I'm deaf"). My immediate response was "What?" or some variation thereof ("Hmm?" "Huh?") to which she didn't respond, either because she didn't see me ask it or because of a similar attitude as the above poster. I didn't say it to be funny, but because she said it very quietly, and frankly it's not the sort of thing a person expects to hear: ---> Hi. ---> I'm deaf. :: I wasn't even really sure that what she said was "I'm deaf" but only through interactions with her and seeing her interactions with others did I realize that she was deaf and that was probably what she said. Doesn't help that I have tinnitus which - while not the same as deafness - sometimes makes it hard to hear people if they're

LowTalkers. (Sorry about the lenghthy JustifyingEdit but I thought it needed to be said.) * This troper's last name is Keller. No, I am not related to Helen Keller, and it's not funny to ask or assume that I am. As a matter of fact, my whole family only came to the US from Ireland in the twentieth century, so it's pretty much impossible to be related to her. ** Unless she's a distant relative. * This troper knows someone whose older sister's name is...''Alyssa Milano''. I wonder how much it gets joked about. ** I bet she leads a Charmed life. * This troper's first name is Jedidiah. Jed for short if you wish to die. Make a [[TheBeverlyHillbillies Jed Clampett]] joke at your extreme peril. As in I'll gut you and strangle you with your small intestine. ** What, no [[StarWars Jedi]] jokes either? *** No. Those are saved for those among us, like me, named Luke. If ''one more person'' says "Use the Force" to me unprovoked, I will ''delete them from existence.'' Or maybe just punch them. **** Will it be a ''Force'' punch? * flees* **** I will say I've used that on both of my cousins who are named Luke. One hates it and the other enjoys it. The one who likes it is five and his eight-year-old brother is named Jack, and he ''likes'' calling himself [[PiratesOfTheCaribbean Captain Jack Sparrow]]. I've called him "Captain Jack Harkness" a few times, and I thank God that his parents have no idea what ''{{Torchwood}}'' is, or they would ''kill'' me. **** This troper has a friend named Leah, pronounced like "Leia". Making Star Wars jokes around her will result in your death. ***** This troper's name is George Lucas. My friends used to hum the Imperial March when I walked past. ** What about TheWestWing jokes? *** Thankfully after highschool I just stopped using Jedidiah instead going by Jay. No more idiotic jokes. Thankfully no one has yet asked about SilentBob. * The next person who makes a Murphy's Law joke around me will be dissected. And then reassembled. Without anesthesia. And all the parts might not end up where I found them. ** In doing so, you would most likely invoke your namesake trope and rebuild the person, ''Better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster'' * [[GwenStacyWannabe This troper]]'s last name is similar to the last name of a certain [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Deere tractor company owner]] (though spelled differently, and actually Chinese), and pronounced like it too. So, we get "Hey, are you related to the John Deere tractor people?" ''a lot''. ** On top of that, my initials are MD. I get "doctor" jokes all the time. Never mind I can't stand blood in RealLife... But I got off better than my brother, whose initials are [[AttentionDeficitOohShiny ADD]]. And he happens to have issues similar to that particular disorder. My mother says she didn't mean to do it - I laugh at her [[TemptingFate lack of foresight]].

* What band geek hasn't heard the, "one time, at band camp?" joke? This troper heard that joke approximately a bajillion times the summer she went to band camp. No, you aren't creative, and no, it is not funny. ** Also, in this Troper's experience, the only thing getting done at band camp is drill and memorization. ** I took to replying to that line with, "One time, at band camp, I borrowed a flag from one of the guards and...''whoa''." Most people get far too shocked to formulate a reply. * This troper's brother had an English teacher named Mrs. Hoare. Pronounced "Whore". * This Troper has the last name of Pope. She heard all the jokes, so don't even start. ** So. . . written any epic poems about minor social scandals lately? * This Troper has a few to share, involving myself and other people. ** My name shares a word with a popular swimming pool game, which I refuse to learn the rules to. ** I used to know someone named Adrian. I was allowed '''one''' "Yo, Adrian!" joke. ** I used to know someone named Damian. I didn't make jokes, but we discussed the "you get one" phenomenon. ** In January 2001 I met a young man named [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2000_United_States_presidential_electio n Chad]]. I didn't make any jokes, but I did say something to the effect of "boy, you must have gotten a lot of jokes at your expense recently," which in retrospect was probably about as bad. * This troper volunteers at an animal shelter. Once we had a cat named Stella. It seemed everyone who met her had to yell "Stella!" It wasn't funny, ever. When she got adopted, there was a collective sigh of relief for more reasons than one. ** This troper is convinced his family adopted that cat. Strangely, the joke never came up in this case. *** Was it a longhaired cat about ten years old? * With my name being Andrew and my brother being named Jackson, you can imagine which dead president's name I hear a lot. On top of that, I have to put up with the name 'Sherman-ator' from my last name. For that very reason I've avoided seeing the Terminator movies (though that may soon change). ** One of my friends is named Sean, and his brother is named Connor. No prizes for guessing what they've had to deal with. * A guy in my Greek class is starting to come under fire for a last name of Lively. * This troper advises people never to refer to somebody named Peter as "Peter, Peter, Pumpkin Eater" or "Peter Pan." Not only have they heard that one before, it's a potential BerserkButton depending on how many times that particular Peter has heard it. ** Are SpiderMan references [[TemptingFate okay]]? ** My brother's name is Peter, and my mom used to call him "Peter, Peter, Pumpkin Eater" when he was little; she also used to call him "Handsome" (and still does), so it all evens out. He did not like it when a couple of classmates called him "Peter Pan," though since he has Asperger's Syndrome, he does have that quality about him (I've

never actually told him, though). And then I started watching ''Series/{{Heroes}}'', which has Peter Petrelli, which makes things more confusing. Last night, I watched an episode and said, "Peter is a MORON!", and then I realized that my brother was right there, and I started apologizing: "Sorry, sorry, ''you're'' not the moron. (Points to TV.) ''He's'' the moron." * No, I'm not Jake the Peg, diddle-iddle-iddle-um, with an extra leg, diddle-iddle-iddle-um. * This troper's name is Adeel. He had heard the joke: let's make a deal, many, many times in school. The most creative example would have had to have been: 'What did Adeel's parents say before making love'. 'Lets make Adeel'. Harr Harr. ** I guess you could call those jokes "Adeel-breakers"! * shot* * Do. No. Compare. This. Troper to the gutter-trash singer that shared the same first name, and had a complete public meltdown, it is an invitation to be spoon-fed your own intestines. * [[JerCox This troper]]'s first name is apparently close enough (though, in fact, a derivative of) to that of a certain bull frog. Who I have had many sing of how said frog was "a good friend" of theirs, etc. etc. This troper's last name is Cox. Being from a town with no appreciable sophistication in the general populace, this troper has heard it all entirely too often. ** Jeremy, right? At least you don't get [[UnfortunateImplications Pearl Jam jokes...]] * Try having the last name Lavergne (silent G) and being born in 1978, during the height of the popularity of a certain sitcom. Seriously. The name Shirley is, by itself, borderline BerserkButton material. * This troper's last name is Hynes. With a "y." So no, ''not'' like the damn ketchup. [[MontyPython Tim the Enchanter]] references, however, are acceptable. * Yes, my name is similar to that of Tyrus Cobb. No, my parents did not name me after him. And I fucking hate baseball. * How did it take this long to mention the name of Mary here? Long, center-parted brown hair. Blue eyes. Sad countenance. Catholic elementary school. There is a small plot out behind the school, under some lovely shady trees, where they buried the bodies. Do not jest at my expense- I have heard them ''ALL''. (And right now, someone's thinking 'haha, trees... dirt... How does your garden grow?' and is laughing their ass off. You, mister, are dead. I now go by 'Alice', which opens up doors for an entirely different category of jokes...) ** [[IncrediblyLamePun Who the fuck are you?]] * ThisTroper learned the hard way that there are some people you don't go whistling "Danny Boy" at ''all the fucking time''. In retrospect, the guy was completely justified. * Total, ''total'' subversion here: My last name is Nankervis, which sounds kinda like wanker, if you put stress in an odd place. I've been waiting ''years'' for someone to make the pun, and now I'm dedicated to finding a place where I can use it on myself. * This troper's first name is Wayne. Wayne Newton, Wayne Gretzky, John Wayne, Wayne's World... interestingly enough, nobody's actually made a joke out of those in years, but when he was a kid adults (and some other kids) would make these jokes ''all the time''.

* This troper's online handle is {{gs68}}. Now, say "[=GameSpot=]" again! SAY. "GAMESPOT." AGAIN. I dare you, I double dare you, muthafucka! Say "[=GameSpot=]" one more goddamned time! (Or [=GameShark=], for that matter.) ** GAMESPOT AGAIN! * This troper's initials are MR. Yes, yes, Mr. MR. Yes I've heard it before, since I was four. No it wasn't funny then either. * This troper's last name is Johnson. ** At least your first name isn't Harry. My poor, poor, cousin. * [[NoSoup4Me This troper]] gave up fighting his surname of "Makepeace" and just went with it. I now greet people with the peace fingers, allow people to call me "Peace" and have a poster of Lennon displayed prominently in my room saying "Give Peace a chance". That being said, "Makewar Makepeace"/"Dont make war, Makepeace" and other variations are tired and unfunny now. I let people off with one when they first meet me. [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment That being said]] I did slip into a joke without realising it at a party recently. After breaking up a fight between two drunkards I moaned "Why do I always have to play peacemaker to you two?"... the looks I got... ** You're not a [[ColonelMakepeace colonel]], are you? ** Are [[TheBartimaeusTrilogy Bartimaeus]] jokes okay? * This troper is always amazed that people need a real answer to the "Kate or Katie?" question. Seriously people, as long as you don't spell it with a "C" it's fine. ** People need an answer because a surprising number of Caitlin/Kaytlin/Cat/Kathrine/Cathrine/Catie/Katie/Cate/Kate/Cat/Kat's flip out if you get their name wrong. * [[{{Lina}} This troper's]] brother-in-law is a police officer, and she cringes every time someone makes a doughnut joke to him. He's a good-natured guy, but still. Come on, people. Do you really want to be tempting a Main/BerserkButton on someone who ''carries a gun''? * This troper got out one half of a "Victoria's Secret" joke before his best friend with said name dumped a Cookie Fudge Fantasy sundae in my lap. Her reason? "That joke is unoriginal. My responses, however, are quite clever." * The next person who compares this troper to a prominent billionaire with a reality show because we have the same first name is going to be fired. Literally, I vow to pull out a blowtorch and set them ablaze. * This troper's last name is Knox. No, I don't have access to the fort, I've never been to Knoxberry Farms, and I've have no idea what Knox gelatin is for. And as with an above commenter, joking about the "singer" who shares my first name and hair color will bring you pain. ** [[http://www.diogenes-club.com/knoxrules.htm Are mystery jokes okay?]] * Non-name example. Yes. I work for a pizza place. No, I do '''NOT HAVE A FUCKING PIZZA FOR YOU!''' Stop asking me that when I stop for gas! * This troper used to work the rides at a theme park, measuring children to make sure they were tall enough to ride. Every day, dozens of full grown adults would jokingly ask him to measure them. Every day, he got closer to chucking one of them onto the track.

* This troper's initials are R U. Yes, that sounds like "Are you?", and no, pointing that out doesn't constitute a joke. * This troper went to college with a guy named David Crockett, and can only imagine ''his'' childhood. ** This troper lived down the street from a David Crockett in Middle Tennessee. Whenever he ordered pizza, he'd have to make up a name or else the establishment would think he was a prank caller. * In a subversion of this, this gay ran-a-website-full-of-penises troper managed to make it nearly 24 years before realizing his last name was one easily typo'd letter away from "boner". * Averted with [[{{Tsochar}} this troper]]. His last name is a girl's first name, but ''maybe one person every few years'' makes that joke when they learn about it. They never do it again (no, I didn't force them, the joke just never sticks for some reason) * This troper's first name is Olivia. You'd be surprised at how many people go "Newton-John?". (I'm actually named after de Havilland, but whatever.) ** I actually know someone whose name is ''Olivia Newton''. I imagine she's at the end of her tether regarding that joke by now. * There's a girl in my class called Pandora. Poor girl. * I invert this trope all the time. I always say things people never heard before. I once made a huge explanation (complete with SesquipedalianLoquaciousness) about how spilling soup on a guy would cause him to fall from a blimp. I also once said something along the lines of "drill a hole in your head and sodomize you through it with a microwaved glow stick." * This troper's first name is Lamont. When meeting me, a few people bring up Lamont Cranston, the real name of comic book vigilante TheShadow. Most mention Lamont Sanford from ''SanfordAndSon''. After 2 1/2 months on the job, one of my co-workers ''still'' thinks it's funny to say "You big dummy!" every time he sees me... * This troper has the misfortune of being intelligent and being named "Albert". Cue the Einstein comments. * This troper has the initials 'E.T'. You can imagine how many 'Phone Hoooome' jokes she has gotten, and they all think they're SO witty. * Anyone who hears this troper's name for the first time (assuming that it's been [[MyNameIsNotDurwood pronounced correctly]]) will invariably break out into a chorus of "Row, Row, Row Your Boat". Said troper has recently been going by a nickname to help stave this off. * This troper's sister has the middle name 'Rose'. It's best not to mention Titanic around her. ** What are your feelings about ''Series/DoctorWho''? * [[{{Yubi Shines}} This troper]] has been using this online handle for at least six years. She knows what it means in Japanese. Yes, Gundam. She knows. Oh god, she knows. * And then we have this one troper who could have taken this one in so many ways, but has so far only gotten [[WinnieThePooh Christopher Robin]] and [[MonkeyIsland Murray the Talking Skull]] references. There were a LOT more possiblities that he found out first by himself. Anyone using those two will be thrown into a lion's den. * This troper knows someone who's surname is "Roche." Pronounced the same as the insect which can survive without a head. Yes, he's heard

it all before, but apparently not as much as his relative with the same surname but first name "Harry." ** I knew someone with the same surname in pre-school, and his first name was Oakly. Since we were in pre-school and unable to hear or talk well, I though that his name was "Ugly" for quite a while and called him that (I guess he didn't notice for the same reasons), yet this never struck me as funny. The mix-up was finnaly sorted out when I was invited to his birthday party and my mom saw the invitation; I had told her that he was called "Ugly:. * This troper's first name is also the name of a popular song. Her surname is in the well-known theme song to a popular cartoon. It's gotten to the point where it's "I wonder which one they'll sing"? * [[{{Sainsbury}} This troper]] enjoys [[{{South Park}} one particular television series]]. However, sometime during its early seasons, they decided to add a character whom shared the same name as me. This would normally be fine, except that particular character was a wheelchair bound boy who could only yell his one name repeatedly. It still follows me to this day * This troper knew a girl in high school with the last name of Blonder. She had brown hair. ** ...which would make her '''blonder''' than someone with black hair. * runs* * This troper has a co-worker who goes by his last name, Montoya. We don't mention that "[[ThePrincessBride Inigo]]" guy. ** ...because you're not prepared to die? [hides] * This troper's younger sister is named Josephine and has gone by "[=JoJo=]" her whole life. Once, when she was about four, my mom said her name while they were in a store, and a little boy said, "Hey, like [[PowerpuffGirls Mojo Jojo!]]" She has also been asked if she has a circus (like in that Disney Channel show for little kids that's called ''[=JoJo=]'s Circus'' or something like that), and when that ditzy popstar [=JoJo=] Levesque showed up, I felt like screaming until I broke glass (my own sister is more talented than that chick). I have since found references to other [=JoJos=] in a [[TheBeatles Beatles']] song, ''Across The Universe'', and ''Pepper Ann'' (Uncle Jojo). I'll add that when my sister was born, my Victorian, control freak grandma (on my dad's side) told my mother, "Well, you finally got your Jo," referring to Jo March in ''Little Women'' because my mother was a tomboy when she was younger and she's still athletic now. ** ... I don't suppose she has [[JoJosBizarreAdventure bizarre adventures?]] *** Well, sometimes living with her feels like [[JoJosBizarreAdventure one big, bizarre adventure.]] * [[KayKay This troper]] has a double whammy. He has a first named that is spelled differently so people can't pronounce it correctly until he teel them how to. Then because of a certain Brady Bunch sister and a stupid movie about cheerleading, he had to suffer fron the stupid jokes. This is until he got fed up one day and "convinced" the last person to not make those jokes anymore. * This troper has the last name 'Little'. If I hear one more person asking if I have a little brother called Stuart I will hit them. Unfortunately, my name can also be anagramed into 'A Little Car'. It's

not even a very creative anagram. * [[{{Dasai}} This troper]] is named Steven in real life. He is not named Stevie, Stevie Wonder, or Steeeeeve Mother-Truckin Polychronopolis. He is not a member of the Rare Hunters, he does not hunt crocodiles. You are not permitted to call him Steve unless you have seen him naked. That is all. * This troper's last name is Mooney. When she was little, lunar jokes abound, but they have stopped. Surprisingly, no one has made [[HarryPotter werewolf]] jokes about her. Or moonstruck ones. ** Are we allowed to say that [[PinkFloyd it's a gas]]? ** Do you have a mad eye? ** Quit making fun of her, guys, it's probably her time of the month. * shot* ** Shooting's too good for you. For you, it's [[TheHoneymooners POW! Straight to the moon!]] * Another non-name example, this troper is a vegetarian. YES. I. CAN. EAT. ANIMAL. CRACKERS. * [[SandBlast This Troper]]'s name is Damian. Make an Omen joke, or misspell it without decent reason, and you'll find out [[IKnowMortalKombat just why people think gamers are so violent]]. * This troper was surprised that, while having the last name of Craze, he was actually only on the receiving end of one joke, which is as follows: "Hello Mr Crazy." Needless to say, I was more embarrassed for the insulter than for myself. Kids were apparently more creative in my father's day however, when he would walk past, they would comment: "There goes a passing Craze." * This troper got tired of people singing "Dammit Janet" at her long before she saw [[TheRockyHorrorPictureShow the movie]]. * This troper has become resigned to the fact that mentioning she's from Utah leads to the inevitable "Are you Mormon?" (answer: no) and has occasionally encouraged people who were obviously suppressing the question to go ahead and ask. * Can someone PLEASE tell me an original joke for Stefan so I can give people something other than just "Hey StefanIE. Hah! Get it?" ** Sure, Urkel * This troper has a tendancey to be rather slow and methodical when he's doing things. Unfortunately, his last name happens to be [[LooneyTunes Gonzalez]]. Hmm? What's that you say? Arriba, arriba, andale? What's Spanish for ''shut the hell up?'' ** You should totally use "''Por qu no te calls?!''". Su Majestad Juan Carlos references for the win. (It's pronounced kai-yez, and it's how King Juan Carlos told off Hugo Chavez once. Very funny real-life moment.) *** [[MadeOfWin You utter genius, you.]] * [[{{Stoney}} This tropers]] last name is Stone. No, I am not constantly stoned. No, calling me Stoner is not funny * It's gone this far and no one's mentioned Randy? Usually played straight though I recall one subversion; after reading aloud a romantic/erotic poem in an English Lit. class during the interpretation the Professor mentioned the poem might have been better served had I read it in a "randier" voice. I immediately assumed he was taking a jab at my name when in fact it hadn't occurred to him to

connect the two. * Through whatever quirk of fate, this troper has worked with a ''lot'' of extremely kind introverts who take in foster animals; it is ''really'' not worth your time to point out to them that there's anything at all out of the ordinary about having six to eight Cairn Terriers in your house at any given time, or about ordering in Thai food and spending Christmas Day alone with them. They've heard it. * Not really name related, but this Troper is a bit of a nerd. And a dead ringer for [[TheUrkel Steve Urkel]]. Guess my Halloween Costume. Guess what everyone asked. * [[{{Quillpaw}} This troper's]] name is spelled C-A-Y-L-E-Y, pronounced "Kaylee". That's an unusual way to spell it you say? I hadn't realized. Well, ma'am, I didn't know my name was so pretty...It's not like the school secretary told me that when she wrote up my hall pass ten minute ago. ** Is it too late to say "we're sorry?" * This troper's sixth-grade school picture features a DeathGlare because of this trope (my name is Ariel and it was three years after TheLittleMermaid came out). In the photographer's defense, it's actually a much better picture than some of the ones with the artificial smiles... * Be born on the 25th of December. I dare you. Not that you have any control over that. Yes, yes, Christmas baby. No, I don't get "stiffed", given that I celebrate neither. I share a birthday with Jesus? No, He probably wasn't born then. I should start giving my birth date as 25 Kislev, 5739... ** You're right about one thing: The date for Christmas was chosen to Christian-ize a Pagan holiday that took place on the same day. Historians estimate that His actual birthdate, if it really did coincide perfectly with the star arrangement, would have been midApril, 6 b.c. Also, flocks do not graze by night in the winter. No, actually my birthday is in March; people calling Christmas "Jesus's birthday" just [[PerfectlyCromulentWord zonking]] ticks me off. ** This Troper has a friend born on Christmas Day... called Joe. After reading these troper tales I'm starting to regret always calling him Joesus around Christmas time. * This troper's name is Mary Grace. If you call me "Mary," I will snap. No, I haven't seen ''There's Something About Mary''. Yes, I realize how popular the name "Grace" is right now. You think my name is pretty? So does everyone else? You have a mother/sister/grandmother/aunt/cousin/neighbor/friend named Mary Grace? Wow, all my relatives, friends, and neighbors do, too. ** Er, you snap if someone calls you by your first name? It's hardly an unreasonable mistake. *** It's an identity thing--"Mary" just isn't me--it's kind of hard to explain. Also, "Mary+ Middle Name" was quite common for a long time, so you'd think some people would remember that, but it seems that they forgot about it when people started giving their kids exotic names and/or surnames, even though the name "Grace" has been pretty popular in this past decade. ** Since being referred to by, or even complimented on your given names is somehow a berserk button, I'm not going to do either. I

''will'' remark that you're at least in good company with the 1,500 ''other'' Mary Graces in every city's phone book. Oh, and if it makes you feel any better, I think your name is positively revolting. * Double subverted for this troper, who considers it an honor to set up one-liners for his acquaintances. Unfortunately, the punniest thing about his name are that his two middle initials are TM (yep, I've heard it), so this is sometimes more complicated than it sounds. * This troper's hereosexual life partner's initials are SLT. She and I are the only ones allowed to joke about it. My wife's maiden initials were DMB; same rules. We married recently; now they're DMC. I'm not sure how long before 80s rap jokes are acceptable. ** This troper is glad that she doesn't live in an English-speaking country, as her full initials are MRS, leaving the middle name out doesn't help, it's still MS. * [[SciFiChica This troper's]] last name is Farnik. You would not believe how many "Fart-niks" she has gotten over the years, it's not even funny. Her maternal great-grandmother's name was Gladys, so she was always called "Happy Bottom" (Gladys=Glad Ass). And her Grandmother was named Elsie, so she constantly got jokes about Elsie the Borden Cow. It could be worse, though- my mother had a classmate whose last name was ''Fluck''. Poor fella... * One of [[PremiumIrritation This Troper's]] names is 'Speed'. I have heard every single joke relating to either quickness or drugs possible twice at the least. It's made worse by the fact that everyone always seems to think they're being dreadfully original. ** No ''SpeedRacer'' jokes? * Years ago, this troper was participating in a Monopoly tournament, when he learned that one of his opponents was actually named Maverick. [[TemptingFate Not being one to resist]] such an opportunity, I walked on over to him during a break in the action and quipped "Maverick. I'm curious. Who was covering Cougar while you were showboating with this [=MiG=]?" Much to Maverick's credit, he didn't try to hit me, but calmly responded with the correct quote: "[[TopGun Cougar was doing just fine.]]" -This Maverick would like to thank you for your originality. Most people just say "Oh, like the movie" or ask if you've seen it. Which, incidentally, this troper had refused to do until recently. * I '''know''' smoking is going to kill me. At this point, that's the whole idea, dumbass. Personally, my favorite response to this is pretending to utterly freak the hell out and flick the cigarette away, then thank said dumbass profusely for saving my life, as though the fact that cigarettes are harmful was entirely foreign to me. It always gets rid of them. ** I get sick of that too, you need a witty response. Here's what I say: "Whatever doesn't kill you, only postpones the inevitable." * [[UnfortunateNames Names]] that tend to provoke the jokes that lead to this StockPhrase being uttered in exasperation: ** Adrian - [[{{Rocky}} ADRIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN]]! ** Alexander - When you meet a guy called like this, make puns about AlexanderTheGreat. [[SarcasmMode They will enjoy it thoroughly and have never heard it before]]. In Holland, it's even worse; the prince is called Alexander and his wife Maxima. So sure, make jokes about

where Maxima is when someone introduces himself as Alexander, when they're Dutch. [[BerserkButton Hey, it's not like they've heard it]] [[BlatantLies a million times already]]! ** Alice - "Alice? Who the fuck is Alice?" ** Alvin - [[AlvinAndTheChipmunks "Alvin. ''Alvin...'']] '''''ALVIIINNNN!''''' ** Annabelle - there's a well-known and rather annoying song about a girl by that name in Dutch. This troper knows a girl who was actually named for the song. ** Annie - "The sun'll come out -- tomorrow!" *** [[MichaelJackson "So, Annie, are you okay?"]] ** Benjamin- [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All_About_the_Benjamins Its all about us]] apparently. Also, Ben Franklin and Ben Stein. ** Bert/Burt - Some variation on [[SesameStreet "Where's Ernie?"]]. ** Billy - "Billy don't be a hero, don't be a fool with your life..." ** Bond - "Good evening, Mr. Bond" *** Or "[[SurnameFirstNameSurname Bond. (Insert First Name Here) Bond.]]" *** I've been name James Bond, for obvious reasons I go by my Middle name Ryan. Yeah, I can relate to this trope. *** One may feel sorry for the ornithologist James Bond, who was the source of the name for the JamesBond character. **** This editor remembers reading somewhere that after the books came out the poor man was pestered ad nauseam by customs officers about where he was hiding his gun every time he crossed the border. Apparently, he took it in stride. ** Celia - "...you're breakin' my heart! You're shakin' my confidence daily!" ** Caroline - no, no, go ahead and sing that song. She's never heard it before. ** [[{{Superman}} Clark Kent]] - "Hey, where's Lois Lane?" ** Douglas/Doug - "What do you call a man with a spade in his head?" An ambulance. You call them a '''''[[BerserkButton Fucking Ambulance]]!''''' *** [[{{Doug}} Doo do do dododo doo do do do do]] **** *picks up gun* ** Ed/Edward/Edwin: Any school child named "Ed" in the late '60s grew to hate TheMunsters. By the mid-'70s, [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Nohamotyo this one was no longer current]], but many Eds of that generation still refuse to answer to "Eddie". ** Eileen/Aileen- Come on, Eileen. Or the ever popular "Hey, Eileen, you've got something white on your dress." (Think about that one for a second) ** Ella - "Ella, Ella, Ella, eh? Eh? Eh?" Or, alternatively, ''EllaEnchanted''. ** Emmanuelle - yes, some girls are actually called that. ** Ernie - Some variation on [[SesameStreet "Where's Bert?"]]. ** Fletcher - [[{{Liar Liar}} "Hows it hanging?"]] ** Forrest - [[{{ForrestGump}} "Run, Forrest, run!"]] *** Try being a runner. I am going to MAUL the next person who says it.

** Fox/Foxx - [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emilia_Fox Emilia]], [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laurence_Fox Laurence]], [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Megan_Fox Megan]], [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Samantha_Fox Samantha]], [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Redd_Foxx John E. Sanford]], [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_J_Fox Michael]], [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matthew_Fox Matthew]], and [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jamie_Foxx Jamie]] must all be sick of the line "I'm looking for a fox". ** Georgia - "Georgia on my mind." ** Grace - AmazingFreakingGrace *** Or Grace Kelly ** Jack - [[{{Titanic}} "ROOOOOOSE!"]] ** Jake - "Where's the extra leg?" ** Jane - "Hey, where's {{Literature/Tarzan}}?" ** Janie - "Janie's got a gun! Better run!" ** Jeanne or Jeannie: ---> "Hey, grant me a wish!" ---> Jokester sings the ThemeSong to ''IDreamOfJeannie'' ---> [[XMen A long, anguished scream of ''Jeeeeeeaaaaaan''!]] ---> [[TheSmiths "The low life has lost its appeal..."]] ** Jeremiah: "was a bullfrog" ** Jenny: "Jenny, I got your number" ** Jimmy - "Jimmy crack corn and I don't care!" ** Jo: [[LittleWomen Jo March]] or [[{{Supernatural}} Jo Harvelle]] ** [=JoJo=]: [[PowerpuffGirls Mojo Jojo]], [[TheBeatles "[=JoJo=] was a man who thought he was a loner..."]], the popstar Joanne "[=JoJo=]" Levesque, or possibly a number of clowns. *** Or [[JoJosBizarreAdventure ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORAAAAAAAA!]] ** Jude - "[[TheBeatles Hey Jude, don't make it bad.]]" ** Katrina: If you know anyone by this name and are feeling suicidal, sing "Walking On Sunshine" at her. *** And mention a certain hurricane, while you're at it. *** This particular Katrina has actually never had "Walking On Sunshine" mentioned to her, and would probably find it amusing. Do not, however, [[BerserkButton mention the hurricane]]. **** I know a Katrina. Once, completely forgetting about the hurricane, I told her that her looks completely blew me away. Cue awkward stares... ** To that I add the continual confusion as to weather or not Kate and Katie are interchangeable monikers. They are. ** Kenneth ---> "[[SouthPark Oh my God, they killed Kenny!]]" ---> Or "[[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/What%27s_the_Frequency,_Kenneth%3F#Bac kground What's the frequency, Kenneth?]]" ** Girls named Lola tend hate anyone singing a particular Kinks song at them. *** Or Barry Manilow: ''Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl..." *** And don't forget that "Whatever Lola wants, Lola gets". **** [[{{Nerdarena}} This Troper's]] LAST name sounds like "gets" and her first name is substituted quite a bit...

** Lucy - ''ILoveLucy'' ---> "Lucy, you got some 'splaining to do!" --->Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds **** On the first episode of MTV's ''Rock the Cradle'', one of the judges told Lucy Walsh that "I love Lucy", and she responded with "Never heard ''that'' one before." ** Luke - LukeIAmYourFather. ** Marcia - [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marsha_Brady#Marcia_Brady "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia..."]] ** Maria - "''[[WestSideStory Maria! I just met a girl named Maria]]!''" *** [[TheSoundOfMusic "How do you solve a problem like Maria?"]] ** Mario - "[[SuperMarioBros Where's Luigi?]]" ** Mary - "There's Something About Mary." *** Or "Mary, Mary, Why You Bugging?", or "Mary, Mary, Quite Contrary", or "Mary Had a Little Lamb". ** Michelle ---> ''[[TheBeatles Michelle, ma belle]], [[ThePowerpuffGirls Someday monkey won't]] [[{{Mondegreen}} play piano song]]''. ---> More correctly, ''Michelle, ma belle, sont les mots qui font tres bien ensemble'': ''Michelle, my beauty, these are words that go together very well.'' Yeah, it sounds better in French. ** Myfanwy - [[LittleBritain "Rum and coke, please, Myfanwy."]] *** Or [[{{Torchwood}} a certain pterodactyl.]] *** This British troper is called Myfanwy. ''Little Britain'' came out when she was in high school, and the ensuing humiliation was positively a relief given the previous ten years' worth of fanny jokes. (Americans, bear in mind that it's a lot ruder in the UK.) The pterodactyl, she can stand. ** Noah - This troper is ashamed to admit he once met someone called Noah and on learning his name asked: "So how's the ark?" ** Owen - "Hey, Owen, how's it goin'?" ** Paul - Any Christian with this name will probably at least get looked at whenever the apostle by that name (probably his namesake) is mentioned. ** Peter - usually associated with Peter Pan, but also Peter "SpiderMan" Parker, and now, possibly Peter Petrelli from ''Series/{{Heroes}}''. So either you'll never grow up, you can climb walls and sling webs, or you have prophetic dreams and throw yourself off buildings. *** This Troper actually knows someone who's name is Peter Parker. ** Phil - Dr. Phil. Dear God, Dr. Phil. Also anything involving the word "fill". Thank God "Phil of the Future" died out... ** Pleasant. This troper's last name, and has been used as jokes about the weather, one's attitude, peasant, pheasant, present, and much, much more. *** What about [[Literature/SkulduggeryPleasant Skulduggery?]] ** Ray/Raymond. EverybodyLovesRaymond, RainMan, Ray-Ban (sunglasses), Ray of Sunshine, "You can call me Ray, you can call me Jay" (And no, you can't call me Jay, dammit!) ** Robby/Robbie - the robot. That damn robot. ** Robin

*** "Hey, Robin, where's Batman?" *** ''Fly, Robin, Fly''! ** Rose - 'By any other name' *** And now the song [[Series/DoctorWho "FANTASTIC Rose!"]] *** [[{{Titanic}} "JAAAAACK!]] ** Roxanne - "''[[ThePolice You don't have to put on the red light]]''!" There were also several rap songs with this name, and those get quoted a bit less. ** Shane- [[{{Shane}} Geeze, I'm only going down the hall for a drink of water. I'll be back]] ** Stella - [[AStreetcarNamedDesire STELLAAAAAAAAA!]] ** Susanna - "Oh, Susanna, why don't you cry for me?" ** Timothy - ''[[SouthPark TIMMY!!]]'' *** Some call him... Tim? **** I hate going to Christmas Parties... I always get asked to say ''that'' line... ** Tony/Toney-- "Frosted Flakes are more than good, they're grreat!" I swear, next time I hear that one, I'm gonna [[EyeScream gouge someone's eye out.]] *** Or possibly Tony Soprano. ** Valerie - "Why don't you come on over, Valerie?" ** Wilma --->''"[[TheFlintstones WIIIIIILLLLMMMAAAAA!!]]"'' ** [[{{Indigo}} This Troper]] knows someone whose name is Victoria Bell, and must fight every time she hears the name to avoid making {{Pokemon}} jokes. *** Speaking of which..This troper's name is Ashwin. Ha, you mean like Ash from Pokemon? ('cause he wins a lot? Haha!) [[BerserkButton Oh god no.]] **** Would it be better if we yelled "This is my boomstick!" when we see you? ** This troper has a friend (a ''male'' friend) called Ariel. When it's not ThundarrTheBarbarian, it's TheLittleMermaid. ** My name is Simon. It gets old. If you meet someone named Simon, spare him. Please. *** You didn't say "Simon says". *** [[TengenToppaGurrenLagann WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE???]] *** Is it the "drawrings" thing? * This troper has extraordinarily long hair. Everybody she meets wants to know how long it took to grow it. ''Everyone'', regardless of language or culture. ** Seconded. This troper worked in a tourist shop in a tourist-city, frequented by people from ''all over the world''. And still..."How long is your hair?" (Just long enough to reach the top of my head.) And, of course, the constant: "Wow. You have long hair." (What? When did that happen?!) ** Oh my god, I'm so glad I'm not the only one. "Wooow, your hair is so long and beautiful!" Sure, it's a compliment, but one that gets tiring. Especially when you whisper about it as I walk past. I'm not deaf, people. ** Did y'all know, there's this charity, and you can donate your hair to make wigs for cancer patients? Believe me, we are ALL aware of this

fact, as we are told it every. single. day. Sure, it's a nice thing to do, but the charity doesn't actually use most of the hair you send in, and most people with long hair I know have already donated at least once (myself included). Plus, if you want to make wigs so bad, grow your own hair out. It's our hair. Sorry, rant over. * This Troper is a Nuclear Engineer. No, we do not [[TechnicolorScience glow in the dark.]] * In retrospect, this troper should have expected nicknaming oneself 'Zaratustra' on the internet would lead to endless 'Thus spake' jokes. ** Honestly, with a name like that, you should have just put "Thus spake Zaratustra" in your sig. You were practically ''begging'' for it. * This troper used to use the screen name ''Mystress'' a few different forums. Frequent joking about this username standing for ''My Stress'' has prompted me to adopt it as a sort of pet name. * This troper's best friend is named Beavis. [=ProTip=]: Never, ever ask "Hey, where's Butt-Head?" or snicker "Uh, huh huh. Huh huh." to him, unless you want a gaping hole in your chest where your heart used to be. * This troper feels extremely sorry for two people: One is talented Australian actor JackThompson, and the other is Michael Phelps' dad. Why? His name's Fred. * After hearing jokes that creationism is like {{The Flintstones}} over and over, this troper agrees we should stop believing in creationism, if only to get rid of these monotonous jokes. * This troper is six feet seven inches tall, and I actually quite like it when I meet people and they comment on my height (incidentally, "You're too tall" is a surprisingly common one), because I know two thousand funny ways to respond to such a comment, and can thereby seem far more witty and spontaneous than I really am. * Both this tropers first and last names are subject to this, but we'll just stick with the last name of Howe. The variety of "Howe are you doing!" cracks was really annoying, though it has at least died off to use only by people who are intentially trying to rile me up. * This troper's middle name is "Singer." At about age four I got sick of people asking me what I wanted to be when I grew up. And then they got all offended when I got annoyed at them! ** ...a sewing machine? ** Also, did they know your middle name was Singer? If they didn't, it was probably a legitimate question. * This troper's last name is "Sun." During his childhood years, he heard much singing of "Oh Mister Sun, Sun, Mister Golden Sun..." directed at him. (Thankfully, this stopped happening once he was old enough that his peers didn't want to be caught dead singing the song.) * My first name is Charlie. Stop saying "sorry, charlie." For that matter, don't talk about candy mountain to me. I'm just glad I havent heard a joke about a certain chocolate factory... ** Guess the name of my friend who loathes ''Charlie The Unicorn''. * This troper has a friend named Sean. Sean has a brother named Connor. Sean assured me that yes, [[SeanConnery they've heard it all.]] ** Hrm. This Troper's first assumption was "Sean is often mistaken for

John." Which makes it [[{{Terminator}} even better]]. * This troper is a junior military officer who looks substantially younger than his rank would suggest. He is asked his age by virtually ever other soldier he meets. And yes, my parents know I'm here. * This troper's family has a pair of shetland sheepdogs, which look pretty similar to collies. He routinely hears TimmyInAWell variants when he takes them out for a walk. * Another non-name one: This troper (as noted on the SurvivalMantra page) is legally blind in one eye. Although the eye can still see a little, it's sometimes more comfortable to only use the one that doesn't have a big blank space in the central vision, so she occasionally wears an eyepatch at work. She does not know either Jack Sparrow nor Will Turner; she has never walked the plank; she is not a singing cucumber; quit making pirate jokes. (References to [[MetalGearSolid Big Boss]] are much fewer and farther between, but she never minds those because Big Boss is so much cooler than any pirate.) * This troper had a math teacher with the last name of Fontaine. When {{Bioshock}} came out, each student in his class was permitted exactly ONE joke related to said game (not that anyone adhered to that limit, though). * [[{{Thande}} This troper's]] real name is Thomas Anderson. He was at school when ''TheMatrix'' came out in 1999. Do the maths. * This troper was in a grad-school computer science class with a classmate named Sam Fisher. Yes, he ''had'' heard the SplinterCell references many times. * Ever been in a televised spelling bee? You ''will'' be asked by random people to spell words like "{{antidisestablishmentarianism}}". ''Repeatedly''. * [[FuriKuri My]] name is Adam Smith. Yes, I realize there is an economist of the same name. I have for several years. ** [[AdamSmithHatesYourGuts But do you hate our -]] [[TVTropesWillRuinYourLife ...sorry...]] * [[{{Dryhad}} This troper's]] name is William. No, I don't have wish wellingtons. Also, I wear an Akubra (a broad-brimmed Australian hat). "Howdy pardner" is a '''very original''' greeting and '''nobody''' has '''ever''' thought of it before you. * I once went into a Wendy's that had a cashier named... Wendy! As the guy in front of me asked, "Are you ''the'' Wendy?", I cringed at wondering how many times that day the poor girl had heard that joke. ** In all fairness, she probably should have considered that before she got a job there. * [[{{Andyzero}} This Troper]] has dwarfism. He has lived in several different places. Without fail, everywhere he has worked has produced someone who thinks it's clever to call him "Big Guy." Yeah. * This page really, ''really'' needs to be longer. Since so many people are going to read the whole thing. But, anyway... [[{{Vulpy}} My]] real first name happens to be the same a certain very recongizable advertising mascot. Most people don't put it together right away because I use diminutive form of my name, but I've practiced my rant for the occasions when it comes up. I realized I might've polished it a bit too much, though, when I almost brought

embarrassed tears to someone's eyes. I apologized immediately afterward... * My dad has brown curly hair, and for the last ten years or so has had a single grey patch at the front. It's like his hair started to go grey but then forgot what it was trying to do. (Knowing my dad, this is probably exactly what happened.) There is one thing that absolutely everybody says when they first notice this grey patch: "You been painting?" He's very, very tired of it, but too stubborn to dye. * This troper's surname sounds very similar to 'Cool Whip'...a fact that nearly everyone feels the need to point out. * This troper's name is the same as that of a certain witch. Surprisingly, it died down by the time I became a teenager. Then I had to go and wear a witch costume for Halloween. ** Sabrina? One of the Charmed ones? * [[DoctorQuinnMedicineWoman Dr. Quinn]] jokes are no longer funny around [[{{Aela}} this troper]], who isn't a doctor and will ''not'' answer to Mike. And no, she can't fix cars, and she doesn't know anyone named [[TransformersFilmSeries Sam]]. And God help the person who [[BerserkButton brings up Hannah Montana]]. But she has it relatively easy in some respects: she's met a Thomas Moore (utterly sick of Utopia references, being called "Sir", and joking threats of decapitation) and an Annabel Lee (just don't quote Poe around her), and her brother knows a Westley (who just recently broke down and watched ThePrincessBride to see why people kept answering him with "As you wish.") * This Troper is an English Maddison. The jokes about her admittedly questionable sanity were made when she was a child. She will allow one 'Madeline' (which is far more common in England), and at any point after correction, will rip your arms off. Calling her Madeline deliberately is NOT amusing and god forbid you tell her that you prefer it to her own name. * This Troper's last name is pronounced 'oh-tay.' He's very tired of hearing it used in place of the word 'okay.' Fortunately, these jokes are becoming less common, but he recalls one swim instructor in summer school who was particularly fond of it. * For this troper: Yes, I work in a bookstore. Yes, I get to read. ''No,'' I haven't read everything in the store. ''Yes, you're not the first person to ask me that.'' * Important message, people: if you know someone who plays a trombone, do not, under any circumstances use the word "[[DoubleEntendre tromboner]]" or any variant thereof. The word is ''trombonist''. Using the first word is not only unfunny and unoriginal, it may well lead to murder with a blunt instrument, to wit, a trombone. * This Troper's last name is Hunger. Yes, really. I've started telling people "All the possible jokes have already been made." ** Same if you are coming from Hungary. I've heard it all, I've heard it before, thank you I'm not hungry. * This troper has big bushy red hair and is UNBELIEVABLY sick of the jokes that her friends seem to enjoy making about her so-called "80s hair." * This troper's friend had the misfortune to be named Jonathan Kennedy. Please do not ask him if his middle name begins with an F.

* This troper's name is Madeleine. Not Madeline. Madeleine. Not like the books (this troper's name, by the way, is the accurate French spelling). Not like the books at all. [[BerserkButton No.]] ** Did Madeleine Albright get these jokes too? ** This troper's also a Madeleine. Having the Madeline theme song sung at her was her first Berserk Button. * This troper's name is the same as the british coin for two pence. Almost everyone she meets says, "Oh, like in Mary Poppins?". To their credit, no one has ever used it a second time. * If you ever meet an asexual, please give them a break and don't make a comment about amoebas. They've heard it before. ** Or plants. * If your name is Sam, people ''will'' add "I Am" to the end of your name. And if you are a musician, after performing a piece (regardless of how serious or melancholy it may be), people will think it is ''hilarious'' to tell you to [[CasaBlanca play it again.]] * This troper's surname is "Purdy". And he lives in the Southeastern US. His father actually advised him to get used to hearing the obvious joke, because he himself had to put up with it throughout his own life. * This Troper's middle name is Mercedes. And yes, she has heard all the car jokes. However, I actually don't mind, and gently inform them that actually my father chose it because it was Spanish for Mercy. However, only a Spanish person would know that, and even then, they'd probably jump to the car. And no, I don't like my middle name at all, Spanish or not. Moral of the story: NEVER give your child a middle name that is also a well-known brand of something...like a car. ** The 10% or so of the general population that isn't a bunch of idiots should know that the car brand was named after the founder's daughter. You may want to point this out to them. ** I actually thought of Mercds (from Bizet's opera Carmen) before thinking about the car brand, but I'm probably the only one. * This Troper has punched out people he's met for the first time for making Star Wars jokes about his nickname. ** If your nickname is also Luke, then we should definitely hang out. * My brother who has the first and middle names Boner Jones. People often refer to him as B.J, which really isn't any better... * This troper's parents own a pair of dogs...the official breed name is "Spinone Italiano". Spinone is pronounced "Spin-Own-Ey". Pretty much the first thing it seems that EVERBODY notices upon being introduced to this breed is how close that word is to the Italian icecream dessert Spumoni... For the record, this troper thought it was pretty funny herself until she realized just how often she'd be hearing it. * In [[MisterAlways this troper's]] country, there is (was?) a kid's show named "Bassie en Adriaan" (Bassie and Adrian). "Bassies" is a clown. A clown with red hair. He's also fat. This troper has heard the comparison many, many, MANY times. ** At one point he grew so sick of it he stabbed the guy who told him the 'joke' in the hand with a screwdriver. No lie. * This troper's last name is Callaway. She's actually surprised that there aren't more jokes about golf made. On the other hand, if you

spell it with an O one more time... * This Troper knew a guy with the last name Chipman. His middle name was Alvin. Think about it. * This troper knew a girl named Persephone, who tried to hide under her desk when our sixth-grade history teacher announced that our next unit would be Greek mythology. * This troper knew a girl named Juliet. Enough said. No. ''More'' than enough said. ** This trooper ''is'' a girl named Juliet. And she agrees. * My name is Susannah. [[BerserkButton I will KILL you if you even THINK about it.]] Some people are even stupid enough to ''ask if I've heard the song''. And on top of that, nobody can ''spell'' it (Susanna, Suzanna, Susana, et cetera), nor can they pronounce it half the time (dammit, people, the A is not ''silent''!!) [/rant] ** ... I don't get it, what's so special about the name "Susannah"? * Non-name example: [[{{Thexare}} This Troper]] is a cashier. At work, the barcode scanner is a little unreliable. Many people jokingly say "You know, if it doesn't ring up, it's free." It's getting very close to provoking me into a rage resulting in an improvised blunt object sticking out of someone's overly-thick skull, but I need the job so I simply remain silent. * This troper should probably tell you first that she is...not normal. She talks to people nobody else sees, switches between to polar oposite personalities, and is the only person who ever sees the portal to another world called Karfoni at the end of her street. And before you make fun of her, she'd like you to know that she might actually have a mental problem, not that she really minds. Anyway, her two personalities have seperate names (yes, this troper is well aware of how weird that is). They're names are Kitty and Alice. Kitty gets catreferenced way to often to keep track of, and Alice can't go a day without hearing about Wonderland. The funny part is that the fist time someone asked her if she was going back to Wonderland, she thought they were serious and corrected them. "No, it's called Karfoni...oh." ** Actually, separate names for split personalities are fairly common. * This editor's initials are EA. Video game jokes get old after awhile...also, I knew a person whose last name was [[HarryPotter Potter]]. * [[{{Oonerspism}} This troper]] is sick of references to a [[{{Tommy}} certain rock opera]] by TheWho. ** Also, references to Thomas the Tank Engine get old very quickly. Every single person who hears my name mentions it, smugly thinking "hur hur hur I'm so witty and original because I noticed you happen to share a given name with a fictional character in a children's book". No one ever seems to work out that everybody says that, and it wouldn't be funny even if they didn't. ** And there I'd have gone with the black woman in the old ''Tom and Jerry''s. Thomas? THOMAS!? * This troper's family seems to have a massive problem with this. My name is Lily. Sorry to disappoint, but I wasn't born in a valley, I'm not a tiger, I don't wear pink and white together, water is not my residence, I don't feel lonely when not with my twin sister Pilly. I'm not a ex-junkie pop singer, [[DudeNotFunny nor have I had a

miscarriage]]. I did not voice [[TheMagicSchoolBus The Friz]]. I have not been rescued by Peter Pan and Wendy, nor did I give birth to the smegging Boy Who Lived. But I don't mind jokes about being the baby pawn in "Alice's Adventures Through the Looking-Glass." But that's rare. My sister is called Julia. Julia did not get a lot of shit for her name until she called her dog Romeo. Our other dog is William, and the dog before that was Charles. I really question my parents about matters like that. * When I tell someone my last name, I will get at least one of four responses most of the time: "That's a weird name," "What kind of name is that?," "Oh, like [rhyming word, always the same]," and/or "Are you related to...?" The odd thing about the last one is that it's usually ''not'' a famous person I'm being asked about (there is one that I know of, and I've only been asked about him once or twice in my life). * There was a teacher at my high school who had the same last name as I did. No, I was not related to him. Interestingly enough, my biology teacher began to ask this question, and I was preparing to say "no"... only for her to ask if I was related to a teacher at another school... who I actually AM related to. In these peoples' defense, it's not a very common last name and I was only asked by a few people. * The following are not funny to any barista: ** "Do you have just plain coffee here?" ** "I want the most expensive drink on your menu." ** "Why's your small called a tall?" and similar digs at Starbucks terminology. Doubly so if it's jargon that was actually created by the Italians well before Schulz arrived on the scene. ** Ordering a Starbucks drink in a non-Starbucks shop, on purpose. * A friend of mine had a classmate whose last name was "Penus". I can only imagine the jokes he had to put up with once everyone reached puberty. * "Subverted in the 2008 remake of Get Smart: Maxwell Smart: Oh gee, Maxi-pad, I haven't heard that one before! * short pause* I never have heard that before, actually." ** Well aren't ''you'' lucky. [[{{Max}} I]], on the other hand, have endured the "wit" of my peers for what feels like ages. This is a very common one. This trope was this troper's best friend in middle school. * [[OtherJoey This troper]] is, as his handle implies, named Joey. He is not Peter Parker, damn it. But every since the first Tobey Maguire SpiderMan movie came out (when this troper was a photographer for his high-school yearbook), it seems like half of his co-workers and classmates all think it's hilarious to point out the (supposed) resemblance. * This troper's first name is Kirk. Is it any wonder that I developed an irrational hatred for StarTrek and William Shatner before I even entered kindergarten? Making it worse is when people who are knowledgeable about Star Trek find out my middle name: James. * [[{{Azzizzi}} This troper]] has a last name that is the same as an historical character, which was also used for a fictional character on a popular TV show in the 80s. Just about every time I meet someone and they hear my name, they make a reference to one or both of these people. Every time they do, I act like it's the first time I've heard it (without sarcasm). When they say, "You must have heard that a

million times before," I politely say that I have and let it go at that. * Where [[{{Azzizzi}} this troper]] worked, there was a guy whose last name was [=McKee=]. He was about my age, so I figured he would have also seen the 70s TV series of ''The Incredible Hulk''. I ran into [=McKee=] in the copy room one day. He asked me a question and instead of answering, I said, "Don't make me angry, Mr. [=McGee=]. You won't like me when I'm angry," which is a famous line from the show because Jack [=McGee=] was always chasing David Banner. [=McKee=]'s only answer was, "Okay, I won't," and he went about his work as if nothing had happened. I thought for sure he would have heard this line before, but he hadn't. It was only a few weeks later that I was able to explain to him that it was from a show. * This troper is from South Jersey. Don't even think about cracking wise about it. I have heard every joke you could possibly make before. * This troper's name is Simon. How do you do? What's that? But of course, you are the '''FIRST PERSON EVER''' to call me "Simple Simon." Or in a case of {{Did Not Do The Research}}, you could call me "Simon the Pieman." I've never heard THAT one ever. Like every day of his childhood from his mother. * [[{{Goth}} No, it isn't Halloween.]] * For the love of fuck, if [[{{Moogi}} this troper]] hears another 'I'm hungry, so I want Emile' joke, he is going to rip somebody's head off, feast on their entrails, wear their skin as a disguise, [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking and then TP their lawn]]. ** Their entrails, you say? Wow, you must have been pretty hungry. * This editor has an example like the Tiffany Aching example on the page; last name is Price, first and middle are unimportant. Following my dad's joke, I half-believe that my last name's "P-R-I-C-E, just like inflation". I have never heard anybody respond to that with more than a chuckle or two, and never heard it from anybody else, nor any other jokes. More relevantly, my baby brother, first name Markham, almost got the middle name Down. Mark Down Price. My mother vetoed it, thankfully. ** Are you a [[CallOfDuty Cap]][[ModernWarfare tain]]? * I know I remind you of a certain fictional character. No, my friends don't have the same names as his friends. I like the show, don't get me wrong, but I like it a lot less when passing people start referencing it to me and calling me by his name. ''I'M NOT HIM''. Also, an acquintance of mine by the name of Stacy wishes that people would stop making comments about how her mom has got it going on. * This troper has the misfortune of sharing a last name with the ButtMonkey of a certain French movie series. I actually have an uncle who shares both the first and last names of this character. Then again, he lives in Norway, so he doesn't get called out on it. * Non-name example: Asking someone with a tattoo "did that hurt" only makes you look oblivious. Ask what it means, ask why they got it, sure, but please don't ask the equivalent of "did having a needle stuck in you hurt?" This troper had had hers for about two days before she was already tired of the "hey did that hurt". ** Snappy response: "No, it tickled." * A series of unfortunate events led to all my work shirts being

ruined, so I had to wear plain mono-color clothes. Every single customer chuckled as they asked me ''"Hey, do you really work here?".'' '''Every single one of them.''' * I once stopped in to see a teacher and was greeted with "Good Evans, it's you!" I gave the obligatory "har har" before stopping at the realisation that that ''actually was'' the first time anyone had made that joke, in what was then 18 years. * [[{{Freiberg}} I]] am known primarily for my abnormally large [[ForeheadOfDoom forehead]], but I've learned to live with the all the jokes about it that are made every day by many of my friends, and even to make a few really bad jokes of my own about it. However, when people meet me, they inevitably point out that I do, indeed, have a very large forehead, in a tone of voice that suggests that I may have never noticed before. It gets really, really tiring. * ThisTroper has the charming combination of good lung capacity and bad sinuses, which makes blowing my nose a loud event. Yes, I am aware that it is loud. Yes, I am aware of posible resemblance to noises made by the elephant, moose, and other large bellowing animals. No, I am in no danger of "blowing my brains out". Thanks for putting on a good show, I'll be sure to tip my waitress. ** Also, please stop making fun of my [[BerserkButton knife wound]], if for no other reason than the fact [[DisabilitySuperpower that I can still kill you with my good hand.]] * No ''iCarly'' yet? I can't possibly be the only Carly on TVtropes who's about ready to gouge some eyes over that. I do know a Sam, however I do not know a Freddy (or, for that matter, a Fred), I do not have a webshow, and yes, I have heard it a million times before. Thanks for playing. ** You've met her. Though i've only gotten the iCarly joke a couple times. * This troper's name is Josh. In eighth grade, a classmate came to me and said "I'm just joshing with you", in an attempt to invoke this trope. In a subversion, I had ''never'' heard the slang use of my name before, and only after consulting a dictionary did I actually believe him. In addition, people say it to me so infrequently that to this day that I still chuckle hearing it. * [[{{Honeybrown1976}}This Troper's]] last name is Ivey. Cue the "Poison" nickname, especially since she's female and occasionally dyes her hair red. * This troper had a teacher in highschool whose name was Paul Simon. I always had the incredible urge to ask him where Garfunkel was. I managed to hold back somehow, though. * This troper's parents are named Paul and Mary. When they were still together, they were surprisingly good-natured about being asked where Peter was. * [[{{MKH90}} This Troper]] had dreadlocks and is currently growing a new set. No, he is not religious, let alone a rastafari. Now how about shutting the fuck up? * This troper's last name is Van Horn. Yes, that is almost the same as horny, a euphemism for sexual arousal. Ha. Ha. Also, I drive a sedan, and while I know it's not a common name, I'm probably not related to that one guy you know.

* Non-name example: Yes, my family is from Ozark, Missouri. No, I don't want to have sex with my cousin. * This Swedish troper is called Clara, and spent her early school years going by "klara frdiga g", which means "ready, set, go" in Swedish, but it petered out when it had gotten old. The problem is people ''now'' calling her that, ten years later, and the reflex she has to inflict harm on whoever does it. Though the worst problem she has with her name is that it rhymes with her mother's. Try answering the phone, and everyone mistaking you for her. She's gone through too many conversations to count pretending to be her mother, because some people are really, really, ''really'' thick. * As an aspie who has had to explain his symptoms a lot to my friends, I've gotten used to hearing "Ass-Burgers" a great deal. I've taken spelling it out as a CatchPhrase. * Yes, being born on the 29th of Februrary means I only get a birthday once every four years. No, that does not mean I'm "technically" 4. * If you see someone who works in the toy department of a department store, DO NOT joke about them playing with the dolls. * Whenever I have to say my last name for anything, I am now automatically rewired to say "Sandham, like 'sand' and then 'ham', ''yes,'' I was called Sandwich as a child." * [[TheEvilDrBolty My name is Scott]]. Yes, I am aware that there is a song titled "Scotty Doesn't Know." At least the AustinPowers jokes fell out of style. ** This troper similarly refuses to acknowledge [[StarTrek beaming requests]]. * This troper's last name is "Osgood." Which means I am constantly called something that has to do with "bad" or "TheWizardOfOz." A common joke among me and my family is that these people are so [[DoingItWrong mind-bogglingly uncreative]]. * My sister's friend is named Katiee Perry. Nobody cares that it's spelled differently. * Being named "Al" leads to many, many bad jokes whenever quantities of "L" are brought up in Physics or Maths. * I got two. One: People are conviced my last name is Flage (Making me [[{{IncrediblyLamePun}} Cammi Flage]]) and "Hey, Stilwell, are you Still Well?" FacePalm. * This troper is a Front Desk Attendant, and on behalf of all attendants, receptionists, drive through workers, etc - stop telling us it's nice/cold/windy/raining/snowing/etc outside. We know. The last 300 people said it as they passed by. * Every now and then, I watch one of the new ''{{Lost}}'' episodes with some friends who are really into the series. I myself am not into the show, having only seen about four episodes of it total. So every time I watch a new one, my friends assure me that I'm going to be totally... well, you know. * My roommate's surname is Freese. Gym teachers like using it as a command. * This troper's first name is Ashley. Woe betides anybody who [[{{BerserkButton}}dares ask for Mary-Kate]], or cracks related jokes. * [[{{Pikachukid}} My]] surname is Palmer. I make the [[ADateWithRosiePalms jokes]] myself--it'll often be other people who

likely haven't made the correlation. ** A non-name one, however, is that if you're asking to go to the toilet, someone at my workplace will at some point say "Don't fall in." * Yes, this troper's name is Zoe. Yes, like the Salinger book. No, she has not read it. And thanks to hearing that question constantly, she never will if she can help it. ** This troper, also named Zoe, used to hear frequently about "that [[{{Zoey101}} girl on that show-]] Oh, hey, did you hear she got pregnant?" (Somehow, it's also really funny to misspell/mispronounce my name on purpose after I've told you how it's written.) * I have a last name of Lott. Cue endless jokes about "a lot of us," parking, vacant, empty... * The jokes have stopped now, but for about 5 years, this troper heard WAY too many comparisons to a certain woman involved in a presidential scandal. ''{{Friends}}'' jokes will pop up occasionally as well, though since they're rare they're not as bad. * [[{{Tropers/Luna87}} This troper's]] last name (Mott) has made me irrationally irritated by questions about apple products. ** Also, as an animal rights advocate, I get very sick of the line "PETA: People Eating Tasty Animals!" A. I don't even support PETA, AND B. It's [[{{ThisIsSparta}} NOT. FREAKING. ORIGINAL!]] ** No castle jokes? Bah! ** Any Series/DoctorWho jokes? * [[{{Sedron}} This troper]] has been working at a candy store for 4 years, and sees that a ''lot'' of customers have the same tired lines. ** "I feel like a kid in a candy store!" ** "I'll have one of everything!" ** "It's like I've died and gone to Heaven!" (Fun fact, apparentely all of these people are forgetting you have to ''pay'' for the candy. Heaven better not require payment.) ** "If the candy doesn't scan, is it free?" I'm not even sure why this one was ever considered witty in the first place. [[YouFailLogicForever What kind of assumption is that, anyway?]] * This troper is 4'11" and, when making new friends, will ALWAYS hear "Wow, you're short!" at some point, or a nickname regarding my height. I've heard 'em all. * This troper has the last name of "Byas". At this point it's not so much the frequent accusations of being biased that bother me, it's the fact that ''every single person who makes that joke thinks they're being so original.'' * My name is Kimmy. '''''They''''' tended to call me {{Kim Possible}}. [[BerserkButton For your sake, you better not.]] * Yeah, so we've got another [[LuckyMcDowell Troper]] named Luke here, required StarWars comment, let's move on. * I attended my first professional baseball game recently with, a Dodgers game. One of the players is named Casey Blake, and so this conversation ensued: -->Me: Hey, his name is Casey! -->Friend:...Yeah. -->Me: So he's {{Casey At The Bat}}! -->Friend: * facepalm* [[SarcasmMode I bet he's]] {{never heard that

one before}}. * This Troper's real name is Arnold. And yes, [[TheTerminator "I'll be back,"]] and [[TheTerminator "Hasta la vista baby"]] references are [[SarcasmMode so clever.]] Never heard them once in the last, oh, 20 years or so. The [[JingleAlltheWay "Put the cookie down!"]] [[MemeticMutation meme]] isn't quite there yet, but it will be. ** [[HeyArnold Where's Helga?]] ** [[TheMagicSchoolBus Maybe you should have stayed home today.]] * This Troper and a couple of his friends ride unicycles. I can't tell you how sick we are of people asking where our other wheel is. Of course, whenever we hear that comment we are obligated to do that fake laugh thing. On a related note: No. We are not going to learn juggling next. * [[{{Tropers/Ekul}} This troper]] is a nexus of such jokes. My name is Luke, and the first two letters of my last name are Sk. Consequently, I get the standard fare of Star Wars jokes (good thing I'm a fan). Next, I'm short. Four feet tall, no dwarfism or anything. This makes me a halfling/hobbit/munchkin/whatever. I am not [[IncrediblyLamePun Short tempered, rather the opposite.]] So again I adapted to the jokes by adopting the mantra that "Shortness is Superiority". I am ''also'' partially deaf, so I get the standard annoying people who pretend like they can't hear me. I have several disabilities stacked on top of each other, so for long distance I use a scooter. This means everyone asks how fast it can go "Can it really go 50 miles per hour?" No it can't, that's KILOMETERS per hour, and, no it doesn't even go that fast. "Don't run me over!" "You should put spinners on that thing!" "do you ever break the speed limit?" Uhg. Then there's the morons who try to steal my keys, or the people who ask for a ride... I rehearse the insults I'm going to hurl back, but I have always tried to be polite to everyone and just humor them. Even if I did have a little fun and retort something like "I find your lack of originality disturbing" or "It can go faster than you can run, so I suggest you go down the stairs.", it's not like it would stop the arbitrarily large number of people after them from making any of these jokes. And hey, at least there aren't any Redwall fans left. * This is summer in Texas. Of ''course'' it's bloody hot outside. And yes, I have no particular inclination to suffer at work, so it ''is'' rather nice and cool inside. Thank you, CaptainObvious. * This tropette's best friend's name is Majesta. [[http://i50.tinypic.com/11ac30h.jpg Toilet paper jokes abound.]] * With the last name of Burn, I get two very common jokes. The first, and most annoying one, is any sort of references to Charles Montgomery. Not only am I in no way related to a fictional character, but my last name is not the same as his. The second one is a product of having grown up in the 90s. Yes, I am aware that you just "burned" a "Burn". It's not funny. Go away. * (Editor note: this was ported from the main page, and I'm not sure how to reconcile the initial comment with the fact that it's Troper Tales. If you have any ideas, go ahead.) ** "Hey, you're left handed!" *** This (left-handed) troper doesn't mind that one so much,

especially when it's from another left-handed person. **** This right-handed Troper likes lefties(as well as short people). It may be a compliment. * Years ago, this troper's library set up a DVD section right next to the VHS section. And ''every single one'' had a "Be Kind, Rewind" sticker on the case... ** Likely enough the stickers contained an anti-theft device, and the librarians [[TheyJustDidntCare just didn't care]] how odd it looked. * This troper knew someone who just went ahead and had a shirt made that, on the front, said "I'm 6'9" ", and on the back said "and yes, I play basketball". * This troper's name isn't even Clarissa, but it's similar enough that people ask her on a fairly regular basis if she explains it all. * [[{{Tropers/RainNormally}} This troper]] is an avid cosplayer, and he occasionally has to get into full costume before making his way to the convention/picnic/whatever. As a result, he's had to walk through downtown Toronto among the normal folk many times... and ''YES, HE KNOWS IT ISN'T HALLOWE'EN.'' * Every single time I go to United States, I have varying interations of this conversation: -->Some American: So, where are you from? -->Me: The Bahamas. -->S.A: Really?! I've been to Jamaica. (this may or may not be preceeded or followed by a "Hey Mon!") -->Me: [silently reminding self that she is a guest in this country] Really? I haven't. -->S.A.: [confused look] ** Sometimes, I even have to explain that not only is The Bahamas NOT Jamaica, but it is not a U.S. Territory, we don't live in huts, and hula dancers are in Hawaii. * This Troper's real name is "Ahmet". The moment I heard of "Achmed the Dead Terrorist", I knew I was in for it. I was right. * This troper will inevitably hear some sort of reference to BruceLee, [[WhoShotJFK Lee Harvey Oswald]], and [[TheAmericanCivilWar Robert E. Lee]] from most everyone he meets. History teachers don't even last a week before giving in to temptation. * [[{{Tropers/J-MACHine}} This troper's]] name is Jimmy Theed. You have no many idea how many people snorted when my name was read surname first, but you can imagine how terrible unfunny it was the first time, let alone the following 500. Another common one was saying my name, and tacking "the Ducks" on the end, often used as a means of getting my attention. It eventually died down when people mentally aged beyond the mindset of a toddler, but the few that still use it get a glare and a low growl. I'm sorry to dissapoint, but i am also not a [[SouthPark crippled child from Colorado]], nor am i the [[JimmyNeutron star of a CGI cartoon with an underground lab and a robot dog named Goddard.]] * This troper's first name is Marcos, and his middle name is Alejandro. Needless to say, he's heard way more than his fair share of Marco Polo and LadyGaga jokes before. It doesn't help that his brother is named Roberto, either. * This troper is named after a character from a [[ChittyChittyBangBang

certain musical]] and gets the reference ALL. THE. TIME. Seriously, it's NOT FUNNY ANYMORE. * This troper is named Eden. People still think they're cute when they either call me "Eve" or make any reference to a garden. [[BerserkButton Those who've known me longer than a week know not to do that anymore, since it's gotten to a point that I flip out any time people get Biblical about my name.]] * As a John, I mostly avert this with my name. However, as a vegetarian who's fat and tall, I get dozens. No, I don't want a bite of your burger, the weather's fine, and I can tell that I'm fat. My come-back to the tall one is " Are you sure you're not getting a parallax?" My brother, Sam gets "Sam I am" a lot. I also have a friend, and she is quite tall and gets it a lot. They're not creative; get some goddamned new jokes * Hi. My initials are MNM. Yeah, like "M&M", the candy. Laugh it up. I was too young to appreciate the gesture of people "wanting to eat me" in elementary school. Don't think I've told my middle name to anyone in years. Doesn't help that ''some'' fucking [[{{Eminem}} scrawny kid]] wanted to use the phoenetics, as well. * "Hey! You're VERY pale!" "I realized" "Seriously, don't you know about beaches? You see: next time you go there you're going to lay down just under the sun and stay there the whole day" "I can't, I'll get red and blistered" "oh, well...then you might want to start using those tan creams..." "Yeah, sure. Whatever" "Pay me attention! You look like ghost or a vampire! It's creepy" "I'm happy by being creepy, I was born this way" "yeah, buy why can't you get a little darker?" "ok, I'll do it sometime" I never do it. * I met a person whose name was Bellatrix, "Bella" for short. Before, people used to blame her for the death of [[HarryPotter Sirius Black]]. After [[Literature/{{Twilight}} certain series of books and movies came out]] they're always wondering where's Edward. * This troper is a junior black belt in Tae Kwon Do. She has heard all the jokes there are to make along the lines of "better not make her angry". * This troper put up with countless fruit juice jokes all through high school (his surname is Robinson). Reportedly, a few idiotic people used to make ''jam'' jokes at his dad (that was Rob''ert''son). * This french troper was born in Ivory Coast, and he also happens to be [[BlindWithoutEm Blind Without Them]]. The French name for an inhabitant of Ivory Coast is "Ivoirien", who sounds a lot like "see nothing". "That's why you wear glasses!" jokes are never far. * This troper's last name is Rumpel. He has never been called Rumpelstilskin before. He never knew a rump is a butt. He would consequently find being called Rump-Ass hilarious. Some kind soul should introduce him to quality music like the Black Eyed Peas song "My Rumps" because no one has ever done that before. This troper may have been lying when making some of those claims. * On a recent trip to Disneyland, the girl that scanned this troper's pass was a young Black woman...named [[{{ThePrincessAndTheFrog}} Tiana]]. She couldn't help but wonder how often that girl got jokes on the subject... * This troper's surname is Bird. That, and the fact that he is pretty

tall (6' 2", not huge but tall enough) and it's no wonder the first question I always get asked upon meeting someone is "Are you related to Larry Bird?" I've also got a few [[{{Harvey Birdman Attorney at Law}} Harvey Birdman]] jokes, but those tend to be rare. * Have I got a list for you. Now I will divide it into several catagories. ** My oldest brother is name Angus. He has heard jokes about being eaten in a resteraunt, and another brother nicknamed him 'Moo' when he was younger. His favorite ad, incidentally, is "Angus; best quality meat!" which was put on his desk at work. ** Another older brother (I have three) is named Alister Blossfeld. Don't call him Ally Cat or Alistare, don't call him Blossomfield. ** My name is Patience. I am patient enough to put up with all of your lame jokes. Even worse? My intials are PCBD. Yes, there is another name for Angel Dust in there. Ironically, I was named after a grandmother who chose to use Patience instead of her first name, and she was a doctor. ** Lastly; I am another girl from southern New Jersey. Please do not say 'Joisey' as only unintelligent hicks from out of town use that (as we view them). Jersey Shore has no people actually from New Jersey (they are all from Statton Island). New Jersey is not a polluted hellhole; we have a conservation zone of unique Pine Barrens habitat that was a model for many places. 'What exit are you from' is outdated and inaccurate. Please research the Garden State before making fun of it. The only jokes you can make are about our governers. That is all. * My net name is usually shortened into Poly... No, I don't want a cracker. Please stop asking. * My name is Silke, and I'm from Norway, where "Silke" is the word for silk. And I'm starting to get a [[{{Understatement}} little tired]] of jokes like "You're Silke? My name is Cotton!"(alternatively, another fabric, but it's usually cotton.) This joke in particular(I have heard it too many times), and any other joke related to the fabric, are not funny, and they never were. ** Non-name example: Whenever someone hears I like Pokmon,(probably because I'm known as "the Pokemon fan", although nowadays "the Nintendo fan" would be more appropiate), or I tell them, especially after I say I only like the games, they start singing the Pokmon theme song. Just shut up. * I work at a company where the name of the company is the same as my first name with "Co" (as in company) on the end. Ie, Name Co. I'm answering phones. Most people's phone greeting is "Welcome to Name Co" or "This is Name Co" then "This is Name, how can I help you?". I don't use that because I'd be inducing this trope on myself. Instead, my phone greeting is "Good morning/afternoon, my name is Name how can I help you?" Every so often I'll get someone who then goes Hello Name from Name Co!" then laughs. At that point I do my usual fake laugh, they realise "this poor guy's probably heard that a million times, and it's lame" and then they make an akward laugh or inadvertantly lampshade it. Then I die a little inside. One saving grace is that the company is obviously named after a thing and not a person, so I am spared the "Are you ''the'' Name?" jokes like the Wendy example above. * This troper's first name is "Carlos." Yes, I've been called "Carlos

Mencia" or "Santana." A slight aversion: I don't hear them often nor do they really bother me. (The Santana one I actually like.) This troper also wonders how much crap his friend will get since her name is [[{{Dead Space}} Nicole.]] Maybe none considering when Dead Space 1 came out, no one made the reference. * This French-speaking troper named Sophie always used to hear about a very famous old French children's book called ''The Miseries of Sophie'' in which the stupid kid inadvertently killed animals, broke things, etc, and got whipped as punishment. Worse thing? She ''was'' named after that character. Subverted in later years as she started introducing herself with "like in ''The Miseries of Sophie'', yeah" only to have people actually not know about the book. A new one lately is mentioning it comes from the Greek word meaning ''wisdom'', which would be nice if it weren't coupled with "... one really couldn't tell by looking at you!". Also, this Troper has always been a Ancient Greek geek, so yes, she knows, thank you. ** a teacher whose last name sounded exactly like a French equivalent of "pussy". And yes, it has both meanings in French too. While I imagine the jokes she used to get as a child must have been cute, it got more problematic when she started teaching immature highschoolers. She immediately said in her introduction speech that she had "a delightful last name, yes, thank you" and allowed us to use her first name... though no one did. * This troper's last name is Campbell. Cue the oh-so-clever soup jokes throughout elementary school. * This German troper's first name is Kaspar. I got really tired of the {{Casper}}, DerStruwwelpeter (the Suppen-Kaspar story), Kaspar Hauser and Kasperle (a famous and traditional puppet in Austrian and German puppet theater) jokes throughout elementary school. Add to that the fact that "herumkaspern" in German means "to clown about" and you got one annoyed child. * Katrina Of the Hurricane right here. Even a guy I met 5 years after the fact brought it up. Subverted in the fact I don't really care and I do cause chaos and damage wherever I go. * "Zak Attack". Never funny. * This troper's name is Cesar. Hail to you too. I do like salads. * This troper had a friend who's name is Ben Long. Yes, it's been long since I've seen him too. He's also had a professor who's last name was Rogers. He got his PhD. so people would stop asking if he would be their neighbor. * This troper has been blessed with this. ** My name is Ariel. Yes, like the mermaid. People also tend to ask how to pronounce it properly. I tell them that I don't care (the pronunciation differs even within my family, so I don't really notice a difference). They usually then ask how I pronounce it (which is AHre-el), say it that way once, and never try to get it "right" after that. ** I am aware that I am short. (4' 10'') This also gets me a lot of "You're soooooo cute," which I generally don't mind because I sometimes exploit this. However, if you are my peer and coo or talk down to me, you will not live to see tomorrow. Sadly, this has only been worse lately because this troper was cast as a munchkin in

TheWizardOfOz at school. With elementary school students who are just as tall as her (I'm in 9th grade). ** No, a French horn or mellophone is not "a big instrument for such a little girl." If I needed help carrying it, I would ask, but thanks for asking. No, I WILL NOT TAKE UP THE FLUTE BECAUSE IT IS SMALL! Why someone would pick an instrument because it is small/big like them is beyond me. * This troper is tired of people who make jokes about his big feet, the [[IfYouKnowWhatIMean implications thereof]], or ask for his shoe size. It's not so bad when his friends do it, because they're jokes are genuinely funny, but complete strangers will make comments about them. He also got so sick of the constant {{Norbit}} jokes after that movie came out that he had to cut his hair, ''even though it had been like that for over a year before the movie.'' That's why it's a personal rule of this troper to never make an obvious joke about someone if he's sure they've heard it before. * This troper's last name is "Wood," and everywhere I go, I get both the forest-related puns, and the PG-13 penis-related puns. ** Although, there was one time where I met a guy named Hunter during a poker game. -->'''Someone else''': Dude, stop with the Hunter puns. -->'''Me''': My last name is Wood. Let me have this. Just once. * In my middle school class, there was a boy named Jonas. Cue JonasBrothers jokes. * This Troper's last name is Blank. As in there's nothing there. Yes, I've considered not filling in the last name portion on forms. Yes, my signature would be cooler to simply write a dash after my first name. I know you remember my name; you are not drawing a blank. Yes, [[tvtropeswillruinyourlife I get bad grades,]] but my mind is not blank. When I introduce myself to people, I tell them I've heard all the jokes, and challenge them to prove me wrong. My middle name is also Richard, and someone I knew for a while refused to call me anything but Dick for months after she found out. Also, in high school, 2 of my best friends were a Mr. Campbell, and a Ms. Cheer. Good times. * This troper likes girl with... bigger than average buttocks. If you sing ''BabyGotBack'' to him, he ''will'' kill you. ''[[{{Queen}} Fat Bottomed Girls]]'' is OK, however. Or any other of those StuffyOldSongsAboutTheButtocks. Just not ''[[SirMixALot Baby Got Back]]''. be more original, dammit. * This troper's last name is Merryweather, and she has lost count of the number of weather-related jokes she has heard over her lifetime in relation to it. As much as it is an AwesomeMcCoolname, they can get very annoying. * First off, [[Tropers/SergeantLuke my]] name is Luke. [[StarWars Yeah]]. And I also have a friend, named Mario. ''[[SuperMarioBros Yeah]]''. ** At least your name isn't Luigi. * Averted in that people have never been able to find anything witty about my name (Tessa), not for lack of trying. Played straight in that people keep calling me Teresa, which is annoying. * This trope is all over the place for me. I'm an asexual. The first

few times of being called inhuman, being asked if I would never get children or get married, if I fucked animals or was actually a closet homosexual as a response to explaining that there is such a thing as asexuality were offending enough. Then I realized no one seems to have even heard of asexuality, meaning that everyone reacts like this. I am also in the habit of avoiding anything addictive, which just makes things worse with the inhumanity jokes. Youd think theyd realize that life choice might be caused by some kind of psychological issue. They dont. Im tall as hell, with weight and shoe size that matches this. No, you are not the first to notice. My name is the focus of a song every child in my country knows. I am aware of this. I am also diagnosed with Asperger syndrome, meaning I both loathe repetition and am naturally open about myself. * [[Tropers/{{Agent0042}} This troper]] is named George and got "Curious George," "George of the Jungle" and "George Porgie" all the time. Oh yeah, that's ''really'' clever. Oh, and I'm also asexual, though I don't usually mention it except to people who are already friends or good acquaintances anyway. The rest, I don't care about. Though I have been accused of being gay before. * This troper has a fairly unusual surname that very few people pronounce right first time. When in a group with another person with the same first name, I know when they're referring to me because they pause hesitantly before attempting my surname. Also, said surname lends itself easily to the nickname 'Batty', which I actually adopted at uni to pre-empt the jokes. * Some day I will kill myself brutally for picking a nickname Sir Whinesalot in League of Legends. Damn it sounded like a nice pun at the time. Now, when I dare say anybody anything that's not praising them for their amazing, amazing performance and berating myself for everything they've done wrong, I always, absolutely, literally always get "You really live up to your name" (sic). I usually dismiss that with "Nice joke. I have {{never heard that one before}}!" - not helping much * This troper is named Joe and is just about sick of hearing the following: "Hey, Joe. Whattaya know?" "[[JimiHendrix Hey, Joe. Where ya goin' with that gun in your hand?]]" "''GIJoe''!" "Where did you come from? Where did you go? Where did you come from, Cotton-Eyed Joe?" And lets not get started with the annual church Christmas Pageant. * In my life, I've known three people who have had the name "Joe King", and resolved never to make the obvious remark. I succumbed, on one occasion, when the individual set himself up by saying "You must be joking" to me. * I have always pitied the young girl I knew many years ago, whose name was "Jenna Taylor". * A friend of mine lives in the town of [[ThreeHundred Sparta]], WI. He stops you before you can even start to quote it. * This troper's name is Erik. Yes, I have heard all of the PhantomOfTheOpera jokes. ** This troper's name is Erik too but luckily I never heard those jokes. There was this soap though with a Dr. Erik...I hated when they used that.

* I happen to share a first and last name with Diana Barry from the Anne Of Green Gables. Yes, I am aware of this. Yes, I am also aware that the character is overweight and uptight. No, my parents did not intend that when they named me. A more original one: No, my round earrings are not "Diana berries". * Nothing like getting woken up at two in the morning just so you can hear quotes from Dumb and Dumber. My family name is Seebass, I'll let you figure the rest. * Inverted by a friend of this troper named Douglas. When meeting him for the first time, someone asked him if he would ever return to the Philippines (to which he has never been). He didn't get the [[{{World War Two}} Douglas MacArthur]] joke, but I did. * About how many people got sick of the swine-flu jokes when there was an epidemic. You know, whenever you were getting over a cold, coughed or sneezed, and someone would yell "He/She's got Swine Flu!" * This troper knows a girl named Meeghan, who just happens to be vegan. She told me that whenever someone makes the obvious joke, she "just lets them think they're the first one to come up with it." * This troper has staffed at several small anime conventions, and one of his jobs was checking people's passes to make sure they're valid. The first time someone did the {{Star Wars}} [[{{Jedi Mind Trick}} "You don't need to see my pass" thing]], it was funny. The fiftieth...not so much. * I used to know someone at school called Robin Marks. He used to get accused of cheating in tests all the time. ** For a personal example, my last name is McManus. And yes, everyone at my school, I ''am'' aware that the last four letters of it are "anus". Thank you for pointing it out to me. About a million times. ** Also, I am aware that my first name (Sam) rhymes with things such as ham, spam, jam, etc. '''''Now please stop doing it'''''. Thank you. And yes, I have also heard "[[{{Casablanca}} Play it again, Sam]]" many times. ** I also had a teacher called Miss Jackson. Around the time the {{Outkast}} song was popular. She actually quoted the song at the start of her first lesson (and I mean her first; she was a new teacher at the school) just to let the class get it out of their system. * [[Tropers/SanaMae This troper]]'s name is Mary. I have had: ** "So, where's the little lamb?" ** "How does the garden grow?" ** "Scary mary" (Thanks a ''lot'', phones4u.) ** and best of all...let's just say I'm never dating anyone called Joseph EVER AGAIN. * [[@/{{Seiryu}} I]] have a friend named Paul, whom everyone calls "Paulie." At one point, I felt like a smartass, squawked, and said "Paulie want a cracker?" He turned to me, SlasherSmile at full force, and said [[TheUnSmile cheerfully]] "Congratulations! You're the 3,657th person to say that to me! Your prize is the strange feeling that someone is watching you!" Then he disappeared for the rest of the night, and, indeed, I had the feeling that someone was watching me. Paul is a ParanoiaFuel [[NightmareFuelStationAttendant Station Attendant]]. * This troper's full name, of which the first name is John, apparently

can be sung to the tune of John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt. There are five unconnected cases of this happening. * This troper's last name has the Dutch word for Mussel in it(which is Mossel). There is also a song called translated: Do you know the Musselman? No I don't know him and yes it wasn't funny the first time I heard it either. * This troper's teacher is named Bill Collins. No, he does NOT feel it coming in the air tonight. * I averted this once when I ran into a guy named Luke, I ended making a TalesOfTheAbyss reference, of course, he had no idea what I was talking about. * This troper has a rather obscure last name, too obscure to safely be able to reveal in full, but she will say that the first part of it sounds exactly like "Bieber." It is not spelled like Bieber, but it sounds like it. I cannot count the number of times that I have been asked if I am related to Justin Bieber. My attempts to explain that it is spelled differently (and, regardless, is still a different last name altogether, despite how the first two syllables sound) don't help this at all. ** This same troper's best friend's mom's name is Marcia. She despises her name because every time she meets somebody new, they all say the same thing: "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!" Even my mom, who is her best friend, said it once, and that didn't go over well. ** And, lastly, this troper's choir class recently performed Elton John's "Your Song" for our spring concert. Whenever the director would say, "Now let's do ''Your Song''," one of the kids (it was always the same few kids, too) would reply, "What's our song?" She finally got fed up and told us that it "wasn't funny the first twenty times, either." It did nothing to shut us up. * This Troper's name is Angelina, not to be confused with a [[{{Angelina Jolie}} certain actress]], or a [[{{Angelina Ballerina}} mouse who is a ballerina]]. * This troper's last name rhymes with "Roboto." Basically everyone he's met has eventually used the "Domo arigato" line. * If, like me, your name is Vicky, you'll probably have heard people sing 'Icky Vicky' from The Fairly Odd Parents at you a lot. * I used to know someone named Alejandro, who I never really got along with - Even though this was years after I'd last seen him, when a certain LadyGaga single came out, I got a minor bit of schadenfreude from knowing he was probably somewhere being annoyed by people singing it to him. * As a kid, adults would frequently sing "Michael row your boat ashore" when they heard my name - now I occasionally still get a "Mikey likes it" (especially because my sister and many of her friends ''do'' call me Mikey anyway). * This troper (who can safely reveal his name without fear of people finding him) is called William Brown. [[SubvertedTrope Surprisingly, next to no one mentions the Just William series when he says his name.]] Until he learnt there was a folk song called "William Brown", which was sang at the folk club he frequents. Fortunately, no one else knows it, so my sanity is saved. ----

You say you want to go back to the original page? I've Main/NeverHeardThatOneBefore. ----

NeverLendToAFriend * TruthInTelevision. This Tropers uncle owns a gas-station, and he never forgets the time he gave one of his regulars a loan on his pursue. --> He was here about once a week for four years. Then I told him he owned me thirty bucks the next time he came around. He hasn't came here since. That friendly loan has cost me around five-hundred dollars. * Having a job, I would often pay for things when I was out with another friend, who didn't have a job. He always said he'd pay me back, and then laughed when I reminded him he owed me money. It became a big joke for a while that he would never pay me back, and almost never did. Because of this behavior, I was nearly broke after my first year of college, so he had to pay for everything one day when we went out, as he'd just received a lot of money for graduation. I broke my habit of paying for everything when, despite the fact that he never paid me back and still probably owed me more money than he'd shelled out that day, he demanded that I pay him back my half of everything ''immediately''. Since then, I've only paid for everything when I knew for a fact that he would pay me back, even if I had to refuse to give him his half of things or hang out with him until he paid up.

NeverLiveItDown * This Troper attended a party with her parents where there was copious amounts of wine. She ended up in a conversation with, of all people to tell this story, her old elementary school librarian. Her nickname through high school was "The Green Hornet". She got this nickname because she and her boyfriend (now husband, amazingly enough) were parking in his Green Hornet car during a school dance and in the midst of their naked fun time, one of them bumped the parking brake out of place. The car rolled down the hill and crashed into the ditch, flipping onto its side. The police and fire truck were called, and they were both pulled out of the car naked with half the high school watching from the top of the hill. She is now fifty, and has yet to live it down. * This troper's boyfriend was in Game's Workshop and he forgot the name of the hobbit "Sam" from Lord of the Rings. He thought and thought, and then he said, "Fram." The manager there said, "Yeah he's probably not remembered cause he collected the hobbit's oil." The troper was there laughing at him. ** Ah FRAM.. the hobbit that was an oil collector. * This troper's ex-boyfriend was playing World of Warcraft with her and typed in on screen, "Which way is wet?" In response she typed back to him, "South." Realizing what he typed... he corrected himself and said... "I meant WEST."

** Yeah. Sure. *** Everyone knows you want her even on World of Warcraft. * [[{{Taco}} This Troper]], as a Freshman, has had his share of this. First day of Theater: said a rather insipid comment out of turn. After that, most of my conversations go like this: "Hey, I see you're reading Tsubasa. There's this [[FullMetalAlchemist other manga I read]]--" "Shut up, nobody cares" Eventually led to 2 confrontations with two of my biggest antagonists ** First one had a variation on the above text, with something actually related to the play. Ended in "Shut your Whore Mouth Bitch!" and then a [[TeamFortress2 Batting to the knee]]. I actually managed to squeeze out a "Bonk!" ** Second one was from a bit of theft of some personal items, [[MacGuffin it's unimportant what they are,]] but it ended in... well... *** FALCON... *** PUNCH!! ** This Troper is now known as the annoying/violent one that played Iago rather enthusiastically, so watch your ass. * This troper knew of a boy who wouldn't lend a pound (sterling) to another, and ended up being called "Jew" for years (in a part of the world where there are no Jews, so anti-Semitism can be a laughing matter). ** Poland? ** [[{{Ulysses}} Ireland]]? ** Germany? ...sorry *** DudeNotFunny *** ...[[DontExplainTheJoke Or Accurate]] *** South Carolina? **** [[DidNotDoTheResearch Um,]] [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Congregation_Kahal_Kadosh_Beth_Elohim Kahal Kadosh Beth Elohim.]] * Once this troper did a kind of stupid laugh when laughing at a stupid comment a woman made on tv and my stupid brother wouldn't stop mocking me with it for several months, and this one is actually kind of funny when we watched The Animal for the first time our at the part where Marvin's fat friend looked towards his African American friend while saying "I'm hungry!" and the next scene made it look like he had eaten him and my mom shouted "Oh my God he ate the black guy!" and we still bring it up occasionally. * "Alethia's just taking cards!" is still a catch phrase at the game nights I attend. Based on a time we were playing SettlersOfCatan (back when I was just getting used to the game) and for some reason I was using a port to trade a whole bunch of cards while not on my turn. Nobody noticed at first, and then attention was called as I was in the process of stocking my hand full of cards I'd (fairly, if we don't count that I'm not supposed to do that except on my turn) traded for. It certainly looked like I was just availing myself of a distraction to grab a bunch of cards. ** Another one for our game nights: I had just gotten done babysitting some wound-up relatives, and needed a chance to relax. Got to my friend's house, ended up doing whatever we were doing that night, and

at some point got really snippy toward one of my friends. He called me on it, I apologized, and related that I'd been stressed out due to babysitting. Then I added that I really do like kids, but - meaning to indicate that I needed a break now and then - "I like them in pieces." *** Didn't help when I tried to clarify with "I mean, in sections." **** I swear, those guys were about to ''die'' with laughter. * During [[ARandomSerf this troper]]'s sophomore year in high school, he dislocated his knee during a rehearsal. [[WordOfGod Word Of Director]] says that he will never stop being the backbone of the safety lecture. * Happens so much with this troper and her friends. She will not stop making fun of her friend Starry for a certain comment about Fai from Tsubasa, and Starry's constantly teased by "Starry x Fai Shippers". She's not going to say what the comment was for Starry's sake. This troper also makes fun of her sister for her obsession with Syaoran, a character from the same manga series. * This troper did tech crew for a high school production of LittleShopOfHorrors. The guy who played Seymour, who had played the lead or a major supporting part in every school production since grade eight, who had an impressive vocal range for an eighteen-year-old and was an excellent actor, will forever be remembered by everyone involved in that production for accidentally dropping about ten minutes' worth of lines, thereby screwing up several lighting cues and a costume change, on the second night after opening. Equally, the story told about the backstage manager is not that he managed to prevent this being a major catastrophe, which he did, but that he dropped his pants after the performance was over without realising that he was visible to a handful of lingering audience members. * AllanAokage has this happen to him frequently. It seems that the only way to I can live something down it when something else happens to re-invoke the trope. It's getting better, though. * This troper once declared that she could invent a new letter off the top of her head. Her father dared her to do it. She answered "L". Boy howdy, she is never gonna live that down. At least she has something to get back at him with; he once called NYC "Le Grand Pomme De Terre". * Hoo boy, [[DarkGidora I]] have a lot of these moments. One of my favorites was during a college course entitled "Violence in American History", I referred to the drinking, prostitution, gambling and associated violence of Old West boom towns as "Alcohol, hookers, n' stuff", a girl immediately leapt upon my unique word choice. From that day forward, the relevant term for any sort of sexual behavior in class was "hookers n' stuff". What class of women is oftentimes the victim of serial killers? Hookers n' stuff. Aside from alcohol, where did the mob get a lot of money? Hookers n' stuff. Hell, this actually carried over to the next semester, where the same girl used the old term to refer to what New York Governor Eliot Spitzer did wrong. * When [[TheTallOne I]] was four, I made the following joke: "'Why did the hamburger wear a sweater?' '' 'Because it was cold!'"'' To this day, my brothers mock me about it. ** That is an anti-joke. * My older siblings constantly mock me for all the words I've mispronounced. The fact we're all over the age of 18 doesn't help.

** And my parents seem to think that the fact that I pronounced New York as New Nork when I was a toddler is still hilarious and I'm college aged. Though to be fair I do still laugh at my brother for saying things like "It's micy and snow-wiped outside." * A friend messed up on a singing solo during an elementary school recital. We didn't stop teasing her till jr. high graduation. * Stupid hypocritical asshole ThisTroper knows [[IneffectualDeathThreats threatens her with death]], which he has a habit of doing pretty much all the time at the time (including his away message then, which goes something like "away howling at the moon, disturb me and you will no longer exist"). She threatens him back as what she'd do if he attempted to kill her. Guess what his main accusation against her is? * My sister was part of a {{Improv}} comedy troupe in college that basically aped ''WhoseLineIsItAnyway''. During a "Party Quirks" game, she was acting as the host and found herself stumped by one guest who was playing the Marshmellow Man from ''{{Ghostbusters}}''. Only problem? She hadn't ''seen'' Ghostbusters, and was completely clueless even as his hints got more overt ("I just don't know how I stay puffed, man!") When they finally gave up and flat out ''told'' her, she protested that she hadn't seen the movie, prompting a bad reaction from the crowd -- and her protests that it wasn't her fault, because quote "My folks didn't raise me right!" Because they hadn't shown her Ghostbusters. Did I mention our parents were in the audience that night? Afterwards, they went out and bought her a copy of the movie, and ''still'' tease her about it constantly. * [[FoominBlue When I was younger]], I used to play rough on the swingset; I'd swing as hard as I could, then jump off at the highest point and see how far I went before landing. My parents weren't aware of this hobby until they took us to a public playground while shopping for a new home. When it was time to go, my seven-year-old self happened to be on the swings, and decided to show off... One [[EpicFail epic faceplant]] later, Mom was torn between being paralyzed with utter horror and the fact she couldn't ''breathe'' from laughing so hard. That was the last time I tried that trick, yet mom constantly brought it up, and still does occassionally. * I performed [[{{Understatement}} rather miserably]] during my second semester of high school Chemistry, and my parents STILL make occasional chemistry-related jokes at my expense. Like this recent gem: -->'''Me:''' Remember when I got third place in Microbiology at the science fair in sixth grade? -->'''Dad:''' Yeah. [[SarcasmMode We all thought you were going to be a great chemist]]. -->'''Me:''' * DeathGlare* * One time [[{{Valex}} I]] went with my friends to Mcdonalds. I had just eaten a lot of food, and was feeling extremely lazy, so I kindly asked a man if he could please throw out my garbage. Unfortunately, that man was black, and he took at as a racist comment and yelled at me a bunch. Now I'm known as a racist. :-( * [[{{Febel}} This Troper]] has a very low tolerance for people intentionally doing stupid things and at one point got so frustrated

with one of my friends during a high school assembly that I shouted out, much louder than I intended to, "WHY!? WHY SHOULD YOU NOT DO IT!? BECAUSE IT'S A DAMN STUPID SILLY THING!" So now whenever anyone sophmore grade or up at my high school objects to something that has become the joking phrase to use. Made all the more embarrassing by the fact that this troper is normally rather meek and shy. * One of the two dogs that this troper's parents own is a victim of this. Seriously. The two are as DifferentAsNightAndDay; one is skittish and meek while the other is physically an adult dog but mentally still a puppy. My parents have a tendency to feed both of them scraps while eating meals; the younger one gobbles everything down, while the meeker one takes things "very daintily, like a lady", as Mom puts it. However, one day they apparently got fried chicken, and when Dad looked away from his plate for a moment... he got his biscuit snatched. His ''biscuit''. With chicken sitting '''right there'''. And the thief: none other than the "dainty lady". Ever since then, the poor girl has been constantly teased, with Dad cracking jokes about their "vegetarian dog" and having to guard his biscuits carefully. (It doesn't help that for all her excitability, the younger dog apparently has ''never'' even ''tried'' to snatch anything...) * This troper once went on a downloading binge of all the free DLC for RockBand that was out at the time. [[ICarly "Headphones On"]] was one of the songs. I have never been able to live it down, and jokes about me being a "closet ''I Carly'' fan" continue to be made, despite the fact that I've never even seen ''any'' of the show. * ThisTroper, before he knew what racial stereotyping was, once asked why so many football players were black. [[HilariouslyAbusiveChildhood His parents insist on telling this story to as many people as possible]]. He also made the mistake of saying "You people" in Middle School. * [[ChrisX This Troper]]. He [[SingleIssueWonk went batshit]] on a certain event in SuperRobotWarsOriginalGeneration Gaiden which involved his favorite female [[RidiculouslyHumanRobot Lamia Loveless]] got humiliated and received her DethroningMomentOfSuck. And went batshit again if someone mentioned that event. Time passed. The troper has managed to keep down his wonk and tried to be more civil, following the SRW fandom more normally. The fandom, however, would always remember him as the pinnacle of Lamia's FanDumb and still be that way forever. And whenever the troper types in 'Lamia' in expressing his opinion on favorites... they'd look at him funny. It's gotten so bad that several forums' mod have gone away to lock any of the troper's topic if he dare at least to insinuate that moment in the slightest form possible. * This troper's main character on an online play by post [=RPG=] is the most skilled fighter in the area, has several times saved varying other characters, and frequently gets embroiled in the in character drama between various factions. To everyone other player, he's [[BodyguardCrush 'that guy with an embarrassing crush on his boss.']] Similarly, his other character does a wide variety of [[MundaneUtility strange]] [[PowerPerversionPotential things]] with his RealityWarper powers, but all he's ever remembered for is 'turning that guy's office upside-down.' It seems to happen a lot in this game, actually, as

inevitably whenever a nostalgic discussion is being had on [=IRC=], someone manages to bring up the fact that once, before he took over, the in-character leader of the country threw a chair out the window when he was teaching. * [[{{Emiko}} This troper]] promised to bring butternut squash to a group Thanksgiving dinner in 2008. She decided to follow a recipe for butternut squash casserole that called for grated butternut squash. She proceeded to spend ''two'' hours grating an entire butternut squash, by hand. Her mom still jokes about it with her. * This troper was on a trip to London with some friends. A few of us went to a club, where this troper, through a complex series of events and heartbreaks (don't ask), ended up drinking 23 shots of Jack Daniels in about two and a half hours. He also got a free drink, called a Blowjob Shot, from the male bartender. The night ended with him vomitting on a stripper pole and being dragged out of the club by his friends. The best part? It was later discovered that the club is actually a gay bar. This troper still hears about the time he threw up on a stripper pole in a gay club after getting a blowjob from a guy. * {{Pikachukid}} knows a guy who's mocked for a schoolgirl giggle that he let out precisely once. It's been over a year now, and we ''still'' take every opportunity to mock it. ** Additionally, I myself have been mocked for admitting to a certain...solitary act. Weirdly enough, my surname seems rather fitting for this. And just to throw off suspicion as to my feelings toward the surname: ''I'' first made the pun. * {{Stryper}}'s best friend convinced him to go see {{BattlefieldEarth}} on opening day with his wife. Still bring that one up on occasion. * In fifth grade, I was laughing raucously with some of my classmates, when I farted. It happens. ''Eight years later'' in college, in a different state, my shoulder was tapped, followed by someone yelling "HA HA HA! (Fart noise)." It was one of my old school mates from that day. Dear God. * This troper's mother won't let her forget she nursed for close to two years. In addition, this troper's brother will never lose "Mommy fix it! Mommy glue it back on!". * In sixth grade, I've shown my huge obsession to Pokmon. I'm in 11th grade now. I'm still teased and mocked about it. Many people think I'm still a Pokmon fanboy and my favorite is Pikachu, even though I told them that I moved on to other things, like playing electric guitar and listening to rock and metal. Really annoying. * I'm always remembered for a different stupid thing. * This troper will NEVER let his mother live down the time when she made a right hand turn and let the car get struck by a cement truck that she claims she didn't see, yet I saw (and given that she was the 'experienced driver' in the car, assumed she had as well). Since only the car took damage and no one was hurt, it has become a running gag in our family. * Any family has about 5-10 of these per member. One of the things my family refuses to let me live down was the time when I threw a shingle at my sister (I couldn't even see her at the moment I threw it because I threw it out of a clubhouse window) out of anger because she

wouldn't stop being a complete jerk to me and making fun of my friends. So I grabbed the shingle and threw it towards her to just make her run away. Somehow [[AccidentalAimingSkills it hit her in her eye]] and I got in the worst trouble for it. They still bring that up. * [[{{Tropers/Luna87}} This troper]] is currently finishing up a fanfiction for TheMuppets where they all get super powers and have to use them to save the city. The problem? When I began writing it several years ago on a Muppet fan message board, I wrote the title as "Supper Muppets" (the actual title is "Super Muppets"). The moderator who said he would change the misspelling did not, so it stuck, and my kid brothers have yet to let me hear the end of it. ** Can NLID be positive (or at least non-negative)? Because I adlibbed a line in a play in high school ("good luck with that!" to be precise), and my dad still says that to me once in a while, affectionately. * This troper's maths homework when she was eleven was to do something creative as a study help for learning about shapes. As the serious piece, she did a poster. Then, because she was bored, she created a tongue-in cheek ballad of {{Narm}} for the heck of it. Unfortunately, on the morning, she printed the wrong one off. The nerd she was aged eleven, she decided to wave her lyrics in the air to get out of detention for not doing her homework. Unfortunately, the teacher made her perform the song, which included the lines: --> Take a trip to Polygon Park, the next to last stop on the number 2 bus --> Take a walk round Pentagon Square, where 360 crazy angles, one degree each --> Follow you, take you round it --> Pentagon, hexagon or irregular octagon! {{It Got Worse}} when a boy started laughing. Overly defensive of this bucket of fail, she yelled at him, "DO YOU MIND?!" The teacher loved the song. However, to this day, the [[TheLibby mean girls]] at her school keep asking her to "sing the Polygon Park song". * This trouper remembers when she was a kid when her parents were still together a time when everyone was still happy. Her dad would always tell her mom to not use sharp tools when picking at her teeth and to use floss instead. Her mom didn't listen and she used a knife to pick her teeth...and it got stuck for like twenty minutes. No one lifted a finger because her dad was too busy laughing at her misfortune and her sister was speechless. This girl here panicked seeing a knife in her teeth. We never let her live it down whenever she starts picking at her teeth again. In fact, this trouper will always be the one to bring it up by asking, "Want to use a knife to pick your teeth?" * [[Tropers/{{Animenutcase}} This Troper]] once [[CloudCuckooLander kissed a pole]] on the playground at recess. My classmates made jokes about [[CargoShip my romance with "Mr. Pole"]] for years to come. * For [[{{Tropers/kknd2}} This troper]], its remembering the players in the TableTopRPG that works this way. -->One is remembered for infamusly blowing the entire party's cover

during a game of DarkHeresy via the simple comment 'He's with us.' Which not only derailed the entire plot, but provoked the final boss fight immediately. Apparently making [[GodWasMyCopilot the enemy your ship captain]] was not the wiseist decision. -->Another managed to have the shortist lived PlayerCharacter ever, when her [[CatGirl Nekomini]] mage dropped a fireball into the tiny room she and the guards were standing in. (Think a phone booth) -->Worse off is a player known for the line 'I pull the mirror' A [[ChurchMilitant Paladin]] of his on his first time playing decided that while the rogue was very carefully avoiding messing with the ovbiusly disabled trap in the corridor, he would grab them, since they were worth a large chunk of coin each. [[TooDumbToLive after calling in the rogue to disable the trap in the first place.]] Naturally when the trap blasted the entire party and nearly killed them all, [[BlownAcrossTheRoom sending]] the full plated Paladin down the corridor and [[BeyondTheImpossible physically into the stone dungon wall]], he refused to fess up that he did it out of greed. Topping this off was that [[{{Hypocrite}} his patron god]] directly opposed the goddess of greed. -->By contrast, The OnlySaneMan in our group is known for the same incident that earned this troper a reputation for BeyondTheImpossible Crazy Awesome game mastering. Ambushed by a trio of vampires on the open road, he decided to [[IncrediblyLamePun cut to the heart of the matter]] by running up the tree that the vampire mage was standing on, in full plate mail. Promptly killing the vampire in a SingleStrokeBattle before his landing caused the ground to ripple, and the tree to explode into splinters. Any time he makes a charicter, people ask 'So going to run up any trees this time?' * A classmate of this troper will never live down his freshman semester, where he drank until falling asleep in all parties and licked a cat, among other crazy stuff. Even he misses those days. * One English assignment instructed us to provide an entertaining, ten minute presentation of an assigned [[ClassicalMythology Greek myth.]] One guy decided the time limit was of higher priority. Cue listening to a Youtube video that I will not post a link to to protect the guy's privacy. Let's just say that the teacher [[SarcasmMode drily]] [[TheSnarkKnight informed him]] that a presentation from another period using a computer program for narration had more emotion and was more entertaining than he was. In addition, the kid was asked to never read to the teacher again. We've been slipping it in as a running joke for pretty much anything possible ever since. * [[{{Tropers/Guardyanangel}} This troper]]'s friend was suggesting to her various languages that this troper could find out how to say hello in. ({{It Makes Sense In Context}}.) At one point, her friend suggested, "How about Mexican?" [[HilarityEnsues Cue look of horror immediately afterwards,]]as well as an [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial insistence for the remainder of class that the query was meant to be a joke.]] This troper intends to make this trope {{Truth In Television}} for her friend. * When [[{{nekoalexa}} I]] was about 9, I watched the 1994 [[{{StreetFighter}} Street Fighter]] movie with my sister and cousins (I wasn't 9 when it came out, we just watched it like 6 years after it

came out). Well, I had been playing Street Fighter for years, and was very excited to see a movie based on my favorite game at the time. Unfortunately, as soon as the movie started, I shouted, "THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY STREET FIGHTER LIFE!" Now, 10 years later, if Street Fighter is even ''mentioned'' in my presence, my cousins will be sure to remind me of this. * [[{{Crazael}} I]] once managed to total two cars in about a week due to [[TooDumbToLive working all night and going to school during the day]](which lead to getting about 6 hours of sleep a week). The second one was my dad's Gen1 Prius, now, whenever Priuses are discussed around me, he brings up that he used to have one, until I crashed it. * [[{{D21 Jaydee}} This Troper]] has yet to be forgiven for losing his group in a visit to Las Vegas, Nevada. VivaLasVegas, indeed. -->"I'm already known in this campus as the idiot that got lost in that trip to Las Vegas." -->"We stick with 'the guy that got lost'" * Whenever I feel that my mom is making unreasonable demands of me (which isn't often, thankfully), I remind her of the time she forgot to pick me up from the YMCA for over three hours (this was before cell phones were common). (She was sleeping.) She makes this weird sound that's a cross between a laugh and a cry and pretty much asks me why I can never forget that. * This tomboy troper's extremely girly best friend says "fabulous" or just "fab" all the time.(And tends to use other valley girl terms, such as "like", "totally", and "that's hot") I'm usually the oneplayfully mocking her valspeak, but once, while being particularly CloudCuckoolander-y, I made the mistake of saying "fabulous". She's promised that I will be teased forall eternity. ** Just inform her that you two are [[TomboyAndGirlyGirl a walking clich]]. It should be fun. * This troper frequently shoots down his dad's jokes on this manner by reminding him when he tried to get up a muddy slope (despite my stepmother's pointing out that the car wouldn't manage it) and didn't even get a quarter of the way up. So, I fight fire with fire. Also, me and my dad have vowed never to let my sister's misspelling of "Golden Coin" (How can you spell that wrong and end up with "Golden Colin", anyway) be forgotten, to the extent that it is a bit of a series of jokes about my sister's [[HypocriticalHumour pour speeling.]] * Not funny example: this troper would now rather confide her love troubles in her friends more than she could in her mother. Her mother has not given up on reminding her about the incident with a boy, despite her constant claims that yes she listened to the wrong advice and it's gotten to a point where this troper cannot let it go and it has been wearing down on her emotionally. ** (Above troper) However, a friend of this troper has poor aiming skills and so whenever he fails to throw something at her and hit her point-blank, she teasingly likes to bring up the incident with the mints... * This Troper's brother was out of the room while their friends were hanging out. His computer screen saver was on and it was showing a slideshow of his pictures folder. Then it showed a girl who looved like she had been murdered. This troper's friends immediately went to

the My Pictures folder and found and entire folder of, as we put it, "Dead Murdered Girls." My brother has no idea how that folder got there, but that doesn't stop us from asking him about it whenever we see him. ** This troper thinks your brother knows exactly how it got there. * This Troper was learning how to drive over the summer. Driving up the hill to home, she freaked out seeing a large truck coming out of nowhere and tried to serve to avoid hitting it. Unfortunately, she drove over the sidewalk and crashed into a tree! One month later, the 13-year-old blue Subaru outback was replaced by a red Honda, but the accident will haunt this troper for the rest of her life. Never live it down indeed. * This Troper, will never let his mother live down the time she tried to get the whole family to watch a documentary about a spelling bee. And his brother constantly reminds him that he was responsible for breaking his (the little brother's) arm, although this troper has no memory of doing so. * This troper has a friend that ended up drinking too much, leaving him to be found sprawled on the toilet with his pants down, asking "Which one is the soap?" This lead to our ''female'' friend having to help him stand up, pull up his pants, flush and wash his hands, because the troper himself was laughing too hard. Soap-boy hasn't lived it down in the past 5 years. ** The friend that helped him up actually got plastered much more recently and ended up spending some time before the porcelain throne. Soap-boy tried to pass it off as "Now it's her turn to never live it down!" but I informed him that there was nothing on the order of "Which one's the soap" so it was still on him. * When I was a young, stupid kid, I had started using the internet, and at a Pokemon forum I went to before, I wrote about Sneasel all the time, and how awesome and cute it was. Apparently, some of the older members found this annoying, and after a while started bullying me a lot about this - I became the ButtMonkey of the forums, sort of. Understandably, as I was really annoying back then(but I still think the bullying was wrong!). Even a few years after I had matured and left the annoying-kid-ness behind me, it seemed that people STILL thought of me as that "sneaselblahblah derpyderp" person. (This stopped in a few more years, luckily. And today, I'm almost never at that forum anymore.) * People that has known me since elementary and middle school will pretty much know me as "the Pokmon fan". Though this is not untrue, as I've always been and is still a big fan of Pokmon, it's a bit annoying that this seems to be the one thing they remember about me(especially since I have just a big of an interest in other series like Mario and Zelda now). Maybe because when the Pokemon craze had gone down, no one played it anymore, possibly because "they had no one to play with" and it went from there. I was pretty much the only fan, and everyone knew this. (Just stop singing the [[MostAnnoyingSound dubbed Pokemon theme song]] around me! I DON'T WATCH THE ANIME!) * During a visit with this troper's mate (before we moved in together), I was taken to get ice cream at a local creamery. When it came my time to order, I ordered a waffle bowl with just

sprinkles...which apparently, the lady at the counter mistook as "just a waffle bowl filled with sprinkles, no ice cream". While the lady could be slapped for being that stupid, I will never live the incident down with my mate, as the creamery advertised their ice cream as "Frozen Custard", and up until then, I had ''never'' heard of ice cream being called that. ** Similarly, I once had a bizarre dream that ended with me stopping by a convenience store for some coffee (this troper ''hates'' coffee). It was only one dream, and I had never had the craving for coffee again, but ever since I told him about it, my mate refuses to stop teasing me about how "my dream self wants coffee", each time we pass by the coffee aisle of the grocery store. * My family has two ** For our 2010 Christmas picture, mere seconds before the camera went off, my dad got annoyed and put up ''both middle fingers''. He put them down just in time for the flash, but everyone was laughing too hard for the picture to have come out good. And every time we bring it up again, I will say "I wish it ''had'' taken that picture, just so I could see people's reactions to it!" ** When my little brother was four, my friend convinced him that there was a 'magical talking tree' in the front yard. We were playing Manhunt with a bunch of other kids, and my little brother was on the team looking for people. He heard my friend talking to him from behind the tree and asked 'who's there?', to which my friend sarcastically answered 'the magical talking tree'. My brother's response was just to say 'okay' and walk away. * When [[@/SoWeAteThem yours truly]] was a just a wee lad, I wound up undergoing a fit of nausea not long before I was due for a trip to the barber's. To this day, almost thirteen years later, my mother ''still'' accuses me of deliberately trying to puke my way out of a haircut. * My friend (we shall call her Asiago) told me about a guy she's friends with and he's in college. (we are in high school) They are both literature geeks, but they have opposing tastes and like to have little debates about it. Their relationship is perfectly platonic. Asiago also happens to have a very Victorian-era social sense and when she gets embarrassed she turns this wonderful bright red. So whenever she says anything unwittingly suggestive, I say something fitting the AccidentalInnuendo concerning "college boy" and she turns bright red and curses me. She has my equivalent of course and together we're pretty much like a pair of stoplights when we both feel like letting the other know that they will never live it down. * This troper's sister once tried to make a cup of tea and ended up melting the base of the kettle. I am never, ever letting anyone forget it. * In middle school, [[{{Osakachan12}} I]] had a lisp and somewhat bad speech problems (which I didn't have in elementary, but they came on later). Once, I tried to pronounce 'chip,' but instead said 'cheep.' I also said 'acopalypse' instead of 'apocalypse.' One memorial conversation went like this: --> Me: I finally cleaned my room! I'm so proud of myself! -does some weird movement-

--> Friend 2: Did you just...go...-does said movement--> Me: Yeah, why? --> Friend 2: It's funny. ** Soon, there was also this: --> Me: Anyway, HidekazHimaruya posted a picture of [[MoeAnthropomorphism Ja]][[AxisPowersHetalia pan]] in a [[{{Meido}} maid]] outfit! I was so happy! --> Friend 2: Did you...did you just say you felt like a lemur?! --> Me: No! --> -Friend 1 collapses from laughing--> Friend 2: (insert my name here), see what you did?! ** This lasted all the way throughout school, even when me and Friend 1 went to college. [[SarcasmMode Wonderful friends.]] * This troper can admit to being a bit of a jerk in her earlier years. To this day her friends still think of her as a total {{Yangire}}, despite toning down her violence by a lot. Doesn't prevent me from playing it up sometimes, though. * This troper, after his first time getting drunk, had a rather...enlightening conversation with his vent buddies...long story short, I'm now known as the guild speedo dude, I don't even ''wear'' speedos. * Non-human example, this troper's cat once wagged his tail a bit too close to an open stove fire... He has henceforth been unofficially nicknamed "Charmander". * When out with some friends, I saw a man fall on his bike. I started laughing(yeah, I know it wasn't nice of me, but at that time and place I couldn't help myself) and the others complained about this. To this day, one of my friends keep bringing this up("Remember that time that guy fell off his bike? You sure laughed a lot!") and I just want her to shut up about it already... * This tropette has a few: ** In sixth grade, I was at my strings class. The school was undergoing construction so the class was in a portable. It was a nice day so the teacher left the door open. My friend and I were in the middle of practicing our duet when a wasp flies in and I abruptly screamed. --> Teacher: Go on. Get out of here. --> Me: Did you just say "Carl, get out of here?" --> Friend: Did you just name the wasp Carl? --> Teacher: Don't name the wasp! By the time I go to kill it you'll be, "Don't kill Carl..." ** Then in eighth grade on a class trip to Washinton, DC, I had eaten one stick of rock candy and that apparently was enough to give me a seven hour sugar high. On the way to the Holocaust Museum, I'd seen a pigeon and began chanting: "Go pigeon go! Go pigeon go! Find that food! Go pigeon go!" I'd also asscosiate anything with pigeons so when we were at the airport I said: "We're gonna go on a plane and fly. JUST LIKE A PIGEON!!" ---Hey, remember when Report Siht couldn't find his way back to NeverLiveItDown? ----

<<|TroperTales|>>

Nevermind * It seems to practically a {{Catchphrase}} for this troper's family. It's gotten to the point where arguments have been caused due to annoyance over hearing it AGAIN.

NeverMyFault * When this troper was younger, a least once she had the situation where she would inspire somebody to get an idea, and then get yelled at for inspiring them when the plan doesn't work. * This troper has a friend like this, mostly in ''TeamFortress2''. Almost every death has him say "bullshit" or something like that, and he usually has a contrived reason as to why it's not HIS fault he died. The most common ones being "You should have died first", "Since when did (weapon) do THAT much damage?" and "wasn't the same on MY screen." It's either amusing or very irritating usually. * If you spend any amount of time in online gaming, you're likely to run into people with this attitude. Whenever they lose, it's because their opponent was using a cheat/exploit, their teammates weren't backing them up, the AI screwed up, their computer lagged, or any other excuse other than admitting that their failure was their own fault. * In a dramatic fashion, this troper was often blamed for pretty much anything that went wrong, even though he wasn't even involved in some cases. This had such an impact on this troper, he developed a major case of ItsAllMyFault in his later years, blaming himself for something he didn't even do or didn't even know about, even if everyone knew where the true problem was. * This troper is an amatour Bridge player and was to a few tournaments in his life. And it's ALWAYS your partner's fault. Of course, many mistakes are made on both sides, but every player who ends up low on the scoreboard WILL blame his partner for it. Many who enter the room as friends leave as enemies. * This troper's mother has been complaining for the last few days about how invasive her therapists have become. They're coming more frequently, sending social workers and phsycial therapists to she her, and as she describes it 'keeping her under a microscope'. They've only been doing this recently and my mother goes on and on about how unfair it is and that she doesn't deserve this. Did I mention this all started because my mom tried to kill herself? Yeah. ** That doesn't mean that she doesn't deserve some personal space. Think for a moment, they're making a suicidal woman miserable. There's no way that can go wrong. *** She '''does''' get personal space. They've been coming less even, and she still complains. * Whenever my brothers lose in a video or computer game, they tell everyone that the game has developed a glitch that causes players to lose for no reason.

NeverRecycleABuilding * In [[ParadiscaCorbasi this troper's]] native NY City there are at least two Abandoned Mental Hospitals that are crumbling away with time, and there are empty and abandoned buildings in the Bronx with ''decals on the empty windows'' so they don't look bad, but have been sitting there for decades. * {{randomsurfer}}: At my former college they built a new Planetarium because the old one was ''sinking into the Earth''. There were no plans for reuse of the space or anything though so the old one just sat there, empty and slowly sinking, for years. * Random Troper: In my home town, there's this one shopping center that's been more or less abandoned for over ten years now. The only stores left open are a Safeway and a pharmacy, and those are on the edges of it. The rest of it has sat abandoned and vacant, and no one appears to be in any hurry to renovate it or anything. * This troper's nearest large town has the remains of the abbey, which have gone more or less untouched for centuries after the initial stripping of anything of value and burning. At least until the council itself vandalised them with concrete arches, scaffolding, and closing them off for 'public safety'. Various walls throughout the town show where the valuable stone ended up after being stolen. * There was a Kmart in this troper's home town that sat, abandoned and empty, for a good decade or so. It was even on a major highway and everything, so it wasn't like the land didn't have any value (as far as I can tell). It just...sat there. Eventually someone turned it into a crafts store, but it took * ten years* . * There's more than one old house in this troper's town that's falling apart, but nothing's been done about them. * [[DeltaOne This Troper]] works for local government at County Hall. There's at least three rooms in this vast building that I know of that are not only unused, but kept locked except for annual electrics inspections. No, I don't know why. * This troper's home town has an abandoned restaurant. It used to be another restaurant that failed in six months. Before that, it was another restaurant that failed in two years. Before that, it was another restaurant that...actually had been around since before this troper was born, but still... * In my hometown there is an old department store on the city square that has sat empty and unused for nearly twenty years, despite the entire immediate area undergoing revitalization. New owners keep buying the building, starting work and then shutting down a few months later. Sad, since it's one of the largest buildings downtown and it remains an eyesore. * This troper has worked in environmental consulting for five years, and knows the reason why. Money, my dear tropers, money. Namely, an existing building costs a FORTUNE to knock down. You can't just go in with a wrecking ball and reckless abandon any more. Most pre-1970s large buildings will be riddled with asbestos and lead, which has to be removed before the hard demolition-and costs a fortune to detect, remove, and dispose of. You still eat this cost if you intend to

renovate a building--more so, in fact, as HAZMAT abatement workers feel free to move much more quickly and efficiently if they know they needn't worry about incidental damages-aka can rip out anything that's between them and getting the job done. Structurally, once a building has been left abandoned for too long, no abatement worker in his right mind would want to go in there due to risk of structural collapse: the answer eventually becomes "let the structure fall down by itself, then pick through the rubble-don't help it along, because then it becomes a demolition job instead of a cleanup job." Then there's the likely soil contamination from the previous user. If the previous user is still around, you have a leg up on figuring out what kind of contamination may be present. If the previous owner is trying to SELL the property instead of abandon it, you may even get them on the hook for cleaning it up for sale. Otherwise, expect a lot of expensive guesswork by your environmental consultant, and it's all on you. * Posting this here because AbandonedWarehouse has no Troper Tales page. This troper's old neighborhood had a large "abandoned" warehouse near the center. I say "abandoned" with quotes because it wasn't abandoned at all. Anything and everything that was worth going to or hearing about in the neighborhood, at least among kids, happened at that warehouse. Fights, parties, dances, everything. There was even a sort of marketplace that developed there. Unfortunately, according to my friends that still live there, it's been torn down to make room for a sporting goods store.

NeverSayDie * This seemed to be an unspoken rule at this troper's school after a much-loved and popular girl passed away. Teachers refused to say her name (one in particular going to far as to refer to her as 'that person') and any jokes about or mention of death were short-circuited for awhile. * Averted with my little sister. Ever since she started watching me play [[SuperMarioBros Mario]], she's picked up the words "die", "death", and "killed". However, due to her young age and limited grasp of the English language, she often says things like "he died me."

NeverSayThatAgain * This troper once did this to himself. He's never liked the word "pussy" as an insult, but, on a lark, decided to say it. He hated it. * I've been told this, I've told it to my friends, and we occasionally say it to TV shows/movies/video games whenever a character says something... ah, questionable. * I have this policy whenever someone I know uses the word "brap". Mostly because I find it annoying rather than any sort of double meaning though. * I know someone who reacts this way whenever somebody else uses a word that he dislikes, such as "innit" or "pterodactyl". ** This happens any time anyone says to this troper, "Ite", "Innit", "Brap", "Safe" (used in improper context), "Blood" (used in improper context), "Bear" (used as an ad-adjective), "Lol" (when said, and

pronounced "loll"), "Oh em jee!!" or "Like So Totally". On the other hand, most of his conversations sound extremely dodgy from afar, with good reason. * This (gay) troper uttered a version of this to his father when he referred to ''BrokebackMountain'' as "''Bareback Mountain''." ** This troper's brother described something as "gay" once, and she promptly went into a fifteen minute lecture about the origins of swear words, why they represented taboos, and exactly why this translated into that being an offensive comment. Needless to say, he never said that again. ** This troper had that one backfire. In an attempt to get across that a certain person was actually indeed into guys, I said that '(acquaintance) is seriously gay' (meaning, not joking around) and I was corrected angrily by my dad that that kind of derogatory language was offensive. Cue me attempting to think of the least offensive way to phrase a literal statement of that sort... 'Father, that man is indeed homosexual.' It was a subversion, but incredibly awkward, because I tend to be the person to cry DudeNotFunny when anyone breaks out 'gay' as the all-purpose substitute for 'lame'. ** Lame itself being a similarly, though less offensive, misused term. ** [[DarkSoldier This troper]] wants to do this the next time he plays D&D and one of the guys calls something "gay": He wants to say "No, ''this'' is gay," and make out with the DM, come up for air, and say, "Can we make the distinction?" The look on the group's faces will be priceless. *** I hope you've filled your DM in on this plan. **** Or just smile, since the origional meaning of 'gay' is happy. ** I once used the word gay, referring to something homosexual. One person there took it the wrong way and thought I was just saying gay as in lame, and tried to ''punch me in the face.'' Needless to say, it was very hard to not punch him back, especially on a different occasion, he said that he WouldntHitAGirl, ever, and completely forgot about that day. * This troper's mother has a reaction along these lines whenever someone says "lol" out loud, like it's a real word. It hasn't had any effect yet. ** This troper has a friend that flips out whenever someone says "lol" out loud. It's her {{Berserk Button}}. * Hearing people talk about their jobs makes the self-esteem of this 19-year-old troper, who has never held a job and thus relies on allowance, immediately go down the toilet. ** If it makes you feel any better, you're not alone. And I've tried to get jobs. No one will hire me. *** This troper is the same. Group hug? **** This troper has recently become 20 still unemployed because I can't find someone to hire me so i'll join that group hug. ** Is working at [=McDonald's=], minimum wage, any better? * While watching TheDarkKnight with my boyfriend, [[GwenStacyWannabe this troper]] noticed that he'd started to quietly repeat everything the Joker was saying. In a spot-on ''perfect'' imitation. Now, he is a very sweet guy who more resembles [[SpiderMan Peter Parker]] than a psychopath, so hearing that voice coming out of his mouth was...more

than a little unsettling. He has been told numerous times not do it ''ever again''. ** That is beautiful. I've had people tell me to NeverSayThatAgain when I quote that film under my breath in ordinary situations, mostly because I look more like a sad-eyed Margaret Keane painting than, well, a murderous psychopath. It happens during school. It's bad. ** This reminds me of when I used to make my arachnophobic wife cringe, thanks to my faithful Gollum impression and his creepy lines referencing Shelob. I think the last straw was when I said, "she's always hungry... she always needs... to ''feed''" just before she went to bed. * In first grade, this troper started singing "La Cuckaracha", but I didn't know the words, and so I made some up. Suddenly, everything stopped. "What did you just say?" asked the teacher as everyone shut up. "I really don't know". "Never say it again". I suspect it was the f-word, but I'll never know. * [[DarkInsanity13 This troper]] finds herself saying this whenever someone comes up with a ridiculous nickname for her or repeats a particularly annoying line or imitates an incredibly irritating voice. They never listen, as since they know it bugs her, they proceed to continue to get a rise out of her. Cue the BerserkButton. * [[{{Hinoa}} Me]], to my mother, usually when she tries to say something in Spanish. She always screws up the pronunciation. Nor does she ever listen. A linguectomy has been considered. * This troper, [=RP=]ing a character who had just been [[DeathIsCheap rezzed again]] after another PC killed him: "No, what I mean is that it's nice to be killed by someone good-looking for once. Yeah, go OutWithABang if you know what I mean." "...NeverSayThatAgain." * This troper's father got one of these during a recent family dinner, when describing a conversation he'd had at work: "So, (Troper's) ass really got a lot of mileage today." Cue Troper and Troper's Mother looking at him with horror (Troper more so, being the owner of said ass and having no idea what he was taking about). Troper's Father tried to clarify, in that Troper had once described an unpleasant situation as "ass," which Troper's Father had then picked up and repeated to several of his colleagues as a description of a poor work situation. Troper and Troper's Mother looked at each other, and then said in unison: "Do not ever say that again." * I get these moments as well as "Please, I'm eating" so much. Usually for saying something slightly (or more than slightly) disturbing. Occasionally for even a dirty joke. * [[{{Gerusz}} This troper]] told this to his mother once, when she tried to use chat language. The funny thing is that even this troper doesn't use chat language - in fact, he even punctuates his messages properly (or at least tries). He also told it to his girlfriend when she used gipsy slang and sounded like some fucked up local version of the JiveTurkey. * This troper does exactly this whenever someone uses his old high school nickname. It's his main BerserkButton after all. * While there are a lot of words that tickle my BerserkButton, "sweet" as a synonym for "impressive" has to be the most bubble-headed and moronic of them. Using brand names as verbs ("googled") comes in a

''very'' close second. * A rather horrible example: This troper works as the secretary of her church. One morning her boss left for a pastors' meeting, telling her to only call him if someone died. Two hours later she received a phone call that one of the parishioners -- her neighbor's son -- was killed in a car accident, leaving behind a wife and two children. Pastor is never allowed to say "only call me if someone dies" again and gets yelled at if he does. ** Pastor, what you just did there was what an atheist would call TemptingFate... * This troper was with a group of castmates when they were discussing Chris Brown, and one commented that Rihanna had probably cheated on him. I went off on a rant about how fucked-up it was to blame her for what he did. The culprit said that it hadn't been intended as a defense, but it's never been mentioned again. * This troper frequently uses intentionally facetious slang, and often gets told to "never say that again". Words that have elicited this response in the past include "homie", "badass", "lol", "wassup", "rofl", "innit", "y'all", "whatever", "pwnage", "moneys", "brap" and "spinny". "Badass", "innit" and "spinny" are particularly problematic since they're words I actually use. I have also met this response after a ClusterFBomb (I hardly ever swear normally), and inversely, I've used this response to irritating nicknames and overly morbid or squicky statements made by other people. * This troper holds a strong distate for the word 'sexy' though she has no idea why...So, whenever heard: * I had to say this to my brother when, as [[LordOfTheRings Frodo and Sam have just thrown the One Ring into Mount Doom and are lying amidst the lava]], he goes ahead and shouts: "Brokeback Volcano!" ** This troper also helps teach a Sunday School class of about fifteen kids, eight of which are boys. Due to this, as the only male teacher for the class, I was forced to outlaw the word "beastie" under a vast and unnamed penalty. --->Classmate: So, belly dancing's about looking sexy? --->Me: Ah-ah-ah-AH! NEVER will you say that word!!!!! --->Classmate: What? Sexy? --->Me: Shush it! --->Classmate: Sex-y. --->Me: I said shush it!!! * This troper's Humane Letters classroom had a particularly catastrophic mispronunciation of "grand duchy". That is now, apparently, my royal title. ** Also, my tendency to refer to things having a "buttload" of something or other has led to some disturbing statements. Extended anecdotes that anywhere include the phrase "so, like, his jaw was basically falling off to begin with, like this-- ''(gesture gesture)''-- but when they untied the bandage..." is automatically keelhauled. Due to my tendency to say awkward or disturbing things, we have instituted the Marco Polo Rule. If any topic of conversation is deemed disturbing and someone wants it to never be brought up again, or at least for a long time, they say "Marco". If another person at

the table seconds the motion, by saying "Polo!", the topic of off the table. (The above exchange was about Robespierre, and took place at an Applebee's.) * This troper took a phrase from [[ImageBoards 4chan]] - "raped like a walnut in a waffle iron" - and used it in an email to his sister. Cue returning email demanding that the phrase never, ever be used again. * My friend did not take well to my other friend describing his favorite custard-filled donuts as having "an ''ass''-load of cream." * This troper's mother has a tendency to respond to someone saying "Whatever," with a completely serious, "I'll what your ever." The response was this trope. Also, her mom responds to "What the heck?" with "The heck is..." The worst part is how often her mom stops there. This too results in a Never Say That Again. This is only two of the infamous "mom-isms" that curse this troper's household. * This troper tends to [[BerserkButton go off]] with this phrase on anyone who uses the word 'rape' in video game context. She finds it highly offensive to compare being involved in a pixellated skirmish with the genuine trauma of sexual assault. (In fairness, her best friend was raped a few years ago...) * [[PentiumMMX2 This troper]], for about a day, referred to seconds as "secs" (Like how, back then, some would shorten "second" to "sec"). My sister did, in fact, say "Never say that again"; which I questioned why...until I though about it for a little bit and realized that it sounded like I was saying "sex".... ** This troper did that once when he was younger, discussing a computer game, in an attempt to sound cool (this was a little while before he developed his [[ThisIsSPARTA Undying. HATRED!]] for all things "cool"). He immediately caught himself and didn't say anything else for the next five minutes. * This troper has this reaction whenever someone says the word "foodie." * Spouse shakes in anger at the word Ninny. It's our own personal Nword. * Besides regular BerserkButton things (three most common flavors: "no, ''don't'' call me that name"; "I don't remember ''[[BrainBleach or don't want to remember]]'' this, please stop"; "say '[[SheIsNotMyGirlfriend you loved her]]' and you'll get punched!"), this troper for some time refused to listen to the name of his nemesis who had just left school (once even slapping a friend for saying it out loud). And has a long tradition of not saying a few names out loud - or sometimes, only saying after knocking on wood. One of those being the place he went to study for the second phase of his college admission - he only affectionatedly calls it "[[GodwinsLaw Nazi Youth]]". * I do this for the more annoying catchphrases that my friends like to use to tick me off, though they're usually annoying rather than squicky. Some include "nom", "my face", "take a chill pill" and "human centipede". * This troper LOATHES the word "creamy," the really lame reason being that she thinks it is the ugliest-sounding word in the English language. Hearing it makes her cringe and anyone who spends any amount of time around her will be warned.

* This troper once had the following conversation: Me- Charlie's british accent is SO sexy... Isi- Yes, it is rather british. But mine's more so... Me- Imma pretend that we never had this conversation. * My friend and I were discussing the attractiveness of Koreans and Japanese people, on which we decided Koreans were generally more attractive. Cue this line from my (male) friend: --->Friend: Yeah, I'd totally grab that over in Korea. --->Me: *long pause* don't ever say that again. * This troper was traumatised by a character from a TV show when he was a small child. No-one in his family is EVER allowed to mention it, discuss it, allude to it, etc. ---Go back to NeverSayThatAgain And don't you ''dare'' link it again. [[supersecretspoiler:[[NeverSayThatAgain Hah!]]]] ----

NeverSpeakIllOfTheDead * I tried to avert this. With an awful consequences, when one of a jackass I knew died. -->'''Friend:''' Dude, respect the dead guy! -->'''Me:''' He was a son of a bitch alive, and we shouldn't call him just because he's dead? Who came up with that bullshit logic?! ** Apparently it was considered as my MoralEventHorizon, but you know what, he's still an asshole and if he didn't atone himself for what he did before he died, then [[ThisIsSparta SHAME. ON. HIM.]] * Do not attempt to invert this while in a graveyard. Ever. It quickly ceases being funny when the crickets suddenly stop chirping and your body's 'danger sense' goes to Red Alert. Not even suddenly discovering you can outrun the entire track team to the gates is worth it. * Also averted when someone in my photography class took a picture of a gravestone marked [[RealJokeName Harry Weiner]] just to prove that was an actual gravestone he found. Although he knew nothing about the guy....just that [[UnfortunateName his name was Harry Weiner]]. ** I live across the street from a cemetary. The locals like taking walks in it, either to walk their dogs or just because it's got nice trails and is a peaceful place. My guy and I were walking in it one time and making fun of some of the tombstones. Some of them have bad graphic design. Some of them have decorations the loved ones left on them that prompt me to say "Hey, you leave a lawn gnome on my grave, I'm going to come back to haunt you," and some folks just had unfortunate names. "A. Stiff." It did get to a point at which I told my man to "Stop dragging me to hell" (by making me laugh). If we run into anybody visiting graves, however, we get real quiet and respectful. * Another Aversion - this from the person above who laughs at gravestones in the local cemetary... GIFT. The GIFT, simply put. I was just reading news online about the passing of a favorite actor. While most expressed their sadness and gave their condolences, there were quite a few comments that needed deletion because of their trollish nature.

* This will be averted profanely when this troper's father dies. There's a reason he's never been allowed to be near my kids. * This troper's overly religious friends avert this. They often talk about dead people, mostly Michael Jackson, in a negative manner; even saying he's gone to hell probably. * This troper's mom has been hissing this constantly ever since her own mother and her half-brother died. Sure, she'll still rant and rave about what a terrible, sheltering parent her mother was, but then she'll suddenly stop and utter the trope name. * One of my high school teachers consciously averted this trope while I was speaking to him. We were discussing the inconsistencies of memory, and that's when the concept of NeverSpeakIllOfTheDead came up. He told me that a girl had a died in a car accident a few years before I'd entered high school, and that a reporter had been going around collecting statements from the girl's teachers and classmates. The teacher in question declined to comment, because he couldn't honestly find anything good to say about her. She'd been a bully, disrespectful, and not a particularly good student.

NeverTrustATitle * In a modern version of a hollowed out object, I store my porn in Oblivion. * This troper was surfing on the [[http://www.opse.net/ One Piece Search Engine]] one day and came across a site called [[http://01st.web.fc2.com/ Cockloft]], which [[YaoiFangirl she was hoping]] would be a BoysLove fanart site (judging from the GratuitousEnglish name). She didn't read the description of the site, and just went on in, hoping for the BL. Much to her dismay, she found that instead the site was a fanfic about a horrendously-OOC [[SmugSnake Spandam]] and his OC daughter, with no BL in sight. * This troper bought a book with a guy hanging out with a wolf, called "A Companion To Wolves". Its cover did not at all hint that it had explicit yaoi. Also, I got it when I was eleven. * This has happened before between my friends and I. When I claimed to be watching the best movie of all time, {{The Princess Bride}}, they laughed and asked why I was watching some chick flick. They regretted it later, though, after they found the source of all my spanish accent quotes. --> {{Hello}}. {{My name is Inigo Montoya}}. {{You killed my father}}. {{Prepare to die}}. * I had bit of a subversion due to my own stupidity. Whilst playing a PS1 demo disc I appreantly noticed a title called "Eda's Power Sorcerer", and upon starting the demo imagine my surprise, confusion and dissapointment when it turned out to be a football game. The title of the game was really "Adidas Power Soccer". * [[SharmHedgehog I]] love naming files on my computer weird things. For example, a joke about a man driving a car would be called, "Racecar driver man catches on fire!!", an OverlyLongGag would be called, "20,000 Toilets Under the Sea", and something else would be called [[HomestarRunner "Click on the monkey!!"]]. * On his old computer, this troper had a folder entitled Old

Schoolwork Archive. It contained nothing but pornography and saved images from 4chan. Though admittedly, considering what I actually ''did'' with my time at school... * [[PentiumMMX2 This troper]] has had a few instances of this; mostly involving N64 game, though the most noteworthy was with BlastCorps. When he asked his mom if he could rent it (Mispronouncing the title in the process), she wasn't going to let him because she figured a game called "[[GannonBanned Blast Corpse]]" would be like {{Doom}}. However, then she saw the box, corrected me on it's pronunciation (It's "Blast Cores"), and let me rent it. Still, just about everyone I knew who owned an N64 made that mistake at least once. ---This link won't return you to NeverTrustATitle. * But.... it ''did'' return me there. o_o ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NeverWorkWithChildrenOrAnimals * ThisTroper's community theater has put on a few plays that this applies to. ** In {{Annie}}, one of the cast members had a dog that...physically...was right for Sandy, and rather large to boot. The problem? The poor dog was afraid of the stage, and had to be kept onleash throughout the play, and literally dragged or carried around the stage. It doesn't help if your inexperienced actors don't compensate their lines for it. So we have the memorable scene of: --->'''Annie:''' Come here, Sandy, come on! --->*Dog is being forcibly dragged across the, thankfully, slippery stage* --->'''Annie:''' See? He comes when I call! --->'''Officer:''' Well, OK, but make sure you get him a leash and a license next time! --->'''Annie:''' Yes Sir! On a Leash and with a License! --->'''Me:''' *Looking at the leashed, collared, and tagged dog* ''facepalm'' ** Having small children backstage is always a logistical nightmare, when we did DickWhittingtonandHisAmazingCat, we kept the children, who didn't show up until the second act, in a room very far down the hall from the actual theater until the intermission. * This troper's film teacher has stated this repeatedly. Nevertheless, in movies we've made, we've had: ---> A horse who wouldn't budge ---> A dog with a camera obsession ---> Two little kids who really wanted to be in a movie, but wouldn't say anything in front of a camera. * This is one of the reasons our theater club has a "must be 13 to be on stage" rule. * This troper was involved (on crew) in a production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. The choir of kids was thankfully on bleachers on the sides of the stage the majority of the time, but

beforehand and during intermission they were crowding everywhere we may need and all possibly hard of hearing. Fun times. * This same troper's church has live animals during the Christmas pageant. That's always new and exciting. There's always a donkey or cow that refuses to go down the aisle in the middle to the front. When that happens we normally give up on the cow, but since the donkey HAS to be there and bring Mary and Joseph down the aisle, there's normally a third person (which...is normally this troper) trying desperately to get this donkey to the front. I've been known to get the holy couple to the front and then just drag the donkey back down. We put down tarps and the like, so accidents aren't an issue. However, one notChristmastime our pastor had a goat brought in (cannot for the life of me remember why, it may have been for a children's sermon) and it had accidents everywhere. * A subversion. I was cast in a production of ''Much Ado about Nothing'' that included an animal. One of her roles was as one of the watchmen in the scenes with Dogberry, which for some reason needed to include a dog. We were nervous until we realized that the dog was ''extremely'' well trained and responded to silent hand signals given by his master (who played Dogberry). The only time the dog made a mistake was when he mistook a hand gesture for the signal to jump up and put his paws on his shoulders. Thankfully this provided for a hilarious improv moment. ** [[ShakespeareInLove There always needs to be a bit with a dog!]] ** This troper likewise remembers a production of ''Much Ado About Nothing'' in her town, set outdoors, with Don John arriving on a white horse. It subverted her expectations, because it was the most docile horse she had ever seen. No, not a cast member or advertiser of the production. Also pretty certain no tranqulisers were used. * This Troper's church Easter pageant? The donkey had poop on its hooves and got it all over the fellowship hall, a little boy pulled down his pants and started dancing when we were praying, then yelled JESUS KISS MY BUTT! It was just as bad as it sounds. ** You kiddin' me? That sounds HILARIOUS. * ThisTroper would just like to mention the elementary school drama club in our town. I've seen the kids pull off complicated, wellchoreographed dance numbers, lengthy plays with all lines remembered, and a production of ''AMidsummerNightsDream'', of all things, that according to all ended up hilarious (although {{Bowdlerized}}, obviously.) It was recently split into two groups, by age, and the younger kids' plays are still awesome. In particular, I remember a production of AChristmasCarol by said younger group. One of the [[OneSceneWonder charity workers from the beginning]] got sick less than an hour before curtain. One of the other kids - maybe in second grade - stepped up, learned the scenes' worth of lines, and not only did the scene but did it ''well'' without ever getting a chance to rehearse. (No, I am neither a teacher or a proud parent.) * Not sure if this belongs here or on the main page. Until recently, the cable company that I once worked for had a local community affairs show that was shot and produced in house. Segments featured any organization putting on an event, civic groups, interviews with interesting businesspeople, local artists, occasional visits from the

humane society, school groups, etc. Working with animals was usually where the [[HilarityEnsues fun really got started]]. A few incidents stand out: ** A local historic location had some heritage breed farm animals. The representative brought along a large gray chicken in a covered cage when he came to talk about another event that they were doing. When the cover was lifted off the cage, the chicken immediately started crowing. --->'''Guest:''' "We'll be starting on the fifteenth --" ''[[SoundEffectBleep BRAAAAWWK BUCK-BUCK-BUCK!]]'' "--the nineteenth. ** This one was remarkably tame: A man who trains lions and tigers brought a [[MegaNeko Liger]] to the show. This cat was well trained and had appeared in movies, so it was accustomed to film and TV sets, camera crews, lights, etc. The crew had to move most of the set and equipment out of the studio to give the animal enough room to get in! ** A local zoo sent over a representative with an armadillo. The animal was NOT happy - it crapped in its carrier on the way over, so the zoo guy turned a hose on it before showtime. When the cameras rolled, the armadillo almost bit the zoo guy, jumped off the table, and tried to run away. ** The humane society brought over two cats that were up for adoption. The one the host got to hold must not have been feeling well, because it suddenly let loose a ''torrent'' of diarrhea. Hard to believe such a small animal could contain that much! ** And then there was the time the host got humped by a duck... * This troper once went to a ''Broadway production'' of The Wizard Of Oz where Toto widdled on the stage during the first act. Luckily someone backstage was a quick thinker and sent a Munchkin out with an appropriately bright mop to clean it up during one of the dance numbers. Got a round of applause for it too. ---Go back to NeverWorkWithChildrenOrAnimals, but leave the elephant out of it, for all of our sakes. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NewlyPopularUpdating * [[{{Tropers/HG131}} This troper]] falls under the "single deranged fan" label two times. Once, his multi-month pimping for BuffyTheVampireSlayer (though, more often than not I'd add the trope to the BTVS page only). Now I'm working on pimping KodomoNoJikan, and am going through to try my best to also add it to the trope's page (including going through the related to page and the work's page and adding the work to pages of tropes listed on it but not vice versa).

NewMediaAreEvil * [[{{neoYTPism}} This troper]] was raised to never use the Internet for purchases in any way. Being wary of scammers on specific sites

like ebay is one thing, but to dismiss a whole medium as untrustworthy for any means of purchase, no matter what kind, is ridiculously oversimplifying. (And yet, for better or for worse, it sure sunk in well enough to make me wary of any use of the Internet to buy things...) * [[@/{{Anomaly188}} This troper]] was once talking on Skype with some friends from the forum RP site I staff at. My old man heard me and said that I shouldn't be conversing with people over the internet. My parents have watched too many of those To Catch A Predator specials and therefore think that the internet is populated by male paedophiles and rapists.

NewNeoCity * [[{{Cameoflage}} This troper]] did this with her succession of NationStates nations, first after losing and then regaining interest and then when the second one got deleted for inactivity: the original was Cameonis, the second was New Cameonis, and the third and current is New New Cameonis.

NewRulesAsThePlotDemands * In a Dungeons and Dragons campaign, we had a rather interesting way to incorporate the new rules into the story. We're chasing down a mad Magician, and when we enter his lair, he appears in front of us and taunts us that "he's changed the rules of reality!" and then leaves. This was actually the way of saying we decided to put in a few different rules exclusive only to that dungeon. So for starters, gold actually weighed a lot, and because "not all is as it appears" we had to make a lot more rolls. * My seven year old brother's games, although dont all kids do that in games? A recent one with my brother and his 6 year old brother, was that 6 got a toy gun out in a game and shot 7 in the chest several times from the distance of about 5 inches away, 7 just stood there and said "Im wearing armour that protects me from bullets!". 6 then shot 7 in the head, and he said "Im wearing a helmet!". Then 6 said "but you said that guns were so good they can shoot through anyfing!". 7 then said "But my armour is magic cause I am a wizard!" then shot 6 and said "I shot you, and now youre dead". 6 said "but Im wearing armour too!". "But you cant wear armour!" said 7 "Im the only one who can get the magic armour". 6 said "But thats not fair! When I shooted you, you dont die!" * [[{{Ptitlei015gc004kw4}} Deoxys]] being able to change forme is canon. Deoxys being able to NoSell attacks from [[FateStayNight Saber, Berserker, and Gilgamesh]] while in [[GlassCannon Attack forme]], on the other hand, is this. Of course, in that RP chat, pretty much anything can be {{hand wave}}d by saying some all-knowing all-seeing all-powerful multiversal organization or another (usually [[OriginalCharacter made up for the purposes of the chat]]) desired it to be so. On the other hand, "the age of consent is different when it's [[NaughtyTentacles Deoxys]] on an ArtificialHuman" cannot be so

easily handwaved. ** Sure it can. [[{{Lolicon}} Lolis]] are awesome. ---You can't go back to NewRulesAsThePlotDemands with a click! You have to circle the link and ''then'' click, now. Just clicking it is ''sooo'' season two. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NewspaperthinDisguise * This Troper's great-great-grandfather apparently did this - in his household, that is. He cut holes in his newspaper - with either a cigar or a pencil, details vary depending on who's telling the take to keep tabs on his grandchildren. It earned him the nickname "The Spy".

NiceGuy * This troper always tries to be kind and helpful to others. (Except for you, Chase. You're mean. I don't like meanies. Pooh.) ** Same with [[{{Freiberg}} me]]. Well, except the part about Chase. I don't know him/her. By the way, is it bad that this is the shortest TroperTales page I can find so far? I worry about humanity sometimes. *** A true NiceGuy doesn't brag. And no one would believe him if he did. Maybe the paucity of entries means that being nice is so common in RealLife (among tropers, at least) as to be unremarkable. **** Right, [[HumansAreBastards that's]] [[KnightInSourArmor what it means.]] * This troper's boyfriend is a nice guy. That's partly what swept her off her feet. ** To take an oft used term on this wiki. Are you me? *** Are you both [[{{Tropers/PasswordForgettingTroper}} me?]] ** You, girl, are a very nice avertion of [[AllGirlsWantBadBoys a very sad trope]]. * Can we propose that we just convert this page to any incident of getting put in the Friend Zone? After all, that's where most nice guys end up. ** Although you could argue that that's a different sort of "nice guy"... ** It's actually pretty easy to shift between one and the other. Like the best corruptions, it is unnoticeable until it goes too far. Luckily though it's pretty easy to switch back. * Amen brother. * This troper thinks she's a nice girl. I may have a tendency to stick my foot in my mouth, but I don't generally intend to be mean. In fact, I have a policy of being nice unless given a reason to be mean. If you push my buttons enough, you'll see my dark side! * This troper tends to fall into here most of the time,even though,to be honest,he often falls into the [[DoggedNiceGuy other kind]].He's

kind,nice,polite,even to people who have bothered him in the past.One of my main mottos is to help people whenever I can."[[CatchPhrase Because its not just me in this world.]]"There are other people too,who need help.I admit that every now and then [[SamaritanSyndrome I go too far.]] * [[FarseerLolotea This troper]] is marrying one this year, barring something particularly bad happening. (She calls him a "[[KnightInShiningArmor paladin]]," and means it in the most complimentary possible way.) * Speaking. * This Troper tries, sometimes. * This Troper once dated a Nice Guy. He was sweet and considerate, and completely understood when I was feeling antisocial. In the end, though, his niceness killed any hope the relationship had. He was so nice, there was nothing interesting in the relationship. No past bad deeds, no secrets, no anger even when I tried getting him mad (I may have a bit of a fetish for BewareTheNiceOnes). In the end, it was just too vanilla. Not that he was necessarily a bad guy; he just wasn't my type in the end. ** Yup, AllGirlsWantBadBoys all around. Girls, don't you think that it's better when you feel that you can trust a guy completely, instead of wondering what troubled past he might be hiding from you? It just doesn't seem... sensible. *** Why are you generalizing? You take the testimony of one girl and run with it into a stereotype that falls to pieces anytime you actually talk to a variety of girls. God. We're a bit more varied than that. NiceGuy doesn't have to mean boring- it just means he's nice. * This troper here has often thought about the good in people and likes to help and encourage others the best he could, even if he is upset at times. * While we're typical siblings, my younger brother (while annoying) is this. When I collapsed in the kitchen, he immediately called the paramedics and, usually, he's only acting like a git to distract me from issues. He's eighteen years old and only drinks orange juice. And while it pains me to say it, he's pretty kind and sensible all-round. He's going off to University in a couple of months and I'm scared he'll change. * Present. I'm always helping other people with anything they might ask for. Whether it's listening to personal problems and giving advice, fixing IT-related things, giving massages (free of charge, for friends and family. :) ), helping out older people and...well, just being kind and helpful in every kind of way possible. And yes, he does remember himself and his own need, from time to time. * There is a thin line between NiceGuy and ExtremeDoormat. Finding this line is important: being nice is worthless if you aren't willing to say "[[DidYouThinkICantFeel go fuck yourself, asshole]]" and stand up for your beliefs when people try and take advantage of you. I'm... working on finding this line; my [[KnightInSourArmor life philosophy]] demands it, but the ExtremeDoormat path is ''so'' much easier than risking my ass and saying "GoodIsNotNice." * This troper is such a nice guy that I'm the guy who you know by reputation for a bunch of good reasons (pacifist unless forced to

defend myself, eager when it comes to music and acting, enough jokes (mostly bad) to cheer people up when in the pit of despair...). However, I'm also a Broken Hero (messy divorce between my parents when I was 12, which ended on my 16th birthday, a secretive viewpoint about mankind, used to be a popular guy until middle school started...that is the basics of my fall). Since I've never had a girlfriend, I suspect that the general viewpoint amongst most people is I'm too nice to date (being a badly closeted heteroromantic asexual doesn't help). ** Scratch the last bit. I've recently received some indication (well, vibes) that it may no longer be the case. Where did I get these vibes from? One of the hottest girls in my year, a (different) girl who I've known since year 4 and a (again, different) girl who just arrived at our school. All in two days! Now, if only my nerves weren't like paper... * This troper is a certified Nice Guy. At my school prom when awards like Best Dressed or Most Likely to Rule the World were being handed out, I got a certificate saying 'Nicest Boy'. I couldn't tell you why, but I was slightly annoyed for quite a while afterwards. * My brother was known as the nicest guy in school throughout his adolescence. Unfortunately, so many people took advantage of his kindness that he lost all faith in humanity and now only cares about himself. ** That is so [[TearJerker heartbreaking]]. T_T * When this tropers younger brother was a child, he was one of the most docile and least aggresive boys in his class. * This might be more fitting on a nonexistent JustBugsMe page, but I just hate it when people describe themselves as "nice". Nobody is always "nice" because sometimes you just have to say "Screw you, I want to live my own life!" Being described by others as a NiceGuy is all right, though. As for me, i try to be nice most of the times, but not always. Being cheerful and not holding a grudge on anybody is good enough for me. * This troper usually tries to be a nice gut.I'll always try and help someone out even if I know it means that something bad is going to happen to me because of it, so I also tend to be a bit of a pushover. * Have you notice that most guys who assure a woman that they are a nice guy, are actually socially or mentally inept and would be a horrible partner for the woman of their affections? In any case, i try to be nice to people because i think its the right thing to do. But i won't call myself a nice guy as that just sounds creepy. I'm really a guy who just wants to help others if i can and want to be happy, its far better to call myself that than sound like a creepy inept person who wants to control others (which is what the "nice guys finish last" complainers are like). * This troper wouldn't really go and call himself a Nice Guy, but I ''try'' to be one. I credit it to my parents raising me with an emphasis on strong morals and being the best person I can be. Of course, the problem is that people who are definitely not Nice Guys (or Girls) tend to take advantage of it... I still try to be the best I can to everyone because that's just how I am. * This troper does his best to be a genuine NiceGuy, but it's just... [[KnightInSourArmor so difficult]]. I keep trying nonetheless. Even

though it kills my romance life. * This troper tries to be this, but my kindness is being abused so much that I consider dropping this quality. * I hate it when girls say that genuinely nice guys are "boring" and that "bad guys" are so much more desirable. I'm a female and I'm here to say that I've always sought out the genuine nice guys. The trouble in my life is that I've very rarely come across any! And the few whom I've come across in the past (aside from my partner) don't take a second look at me because they're seeking -- I don't know. One of my friends theorizes that I'm too smart for my own good and my intelligence intimidates most people of both genders. And while it's true that I do tend to get all melty over a "{{nerd}}" with a wide depth and breath of knowledge, pretty much all the nerds I can think of are also {{nice guys}} (vs. the "nice guys" who are really jerks in sheep's clothing). So -- nice guys? Look at smart girls! I'll bet you at least one smart girl in your life really likes you. * I'd consider myself the Nice Guy in the sense that I'm the guy that is permanently friend-zoned, although I definitely can be a jerk at times. But, I don't think I'm the [[BitchinSheepsClothing Bastard in Sheep's Clothing]], I actually enjoy being the nice guy, I hate making people unhappy, it just makes me feel bad that someone else feels sad. If it means I don't get the girls, well, that sucks, but, if I gotta finish last to be nice, then I'll finish last. * I try to be nice, and if my peers are anything to go by, I'm not doing too bad; My niceness is what I am most complimented on. * This troper usually hovers between being a nice guy and jerkass with a heart of gold, but when I'm in niceguy mode... I've been known to give girls diabetes. * This troper's brother is one, and not [[BitchInSheepsClothing the bad kind]] either. He used to be a BrattyHalfPint and a pain in the arse, but is a lot kinder and more mature now, and has an awesome girlfriend. My mum's boyfriend is one too. She's become a lot happier since she got back with him, and I love being around him because he reminds me a lot of my [[DisappearedDad dad]]. * According to [[@/HomemadePsycho me]] ,I'm a nice guy. According to everyone else, I'm an ExtremeDoormat ---Can I be a NiceGuy and help you find a page to browse? <<|TroperTales|>>

NiceHat * This Troper has a Zoot suit hat with a big feather in it, a top hat, four fedoras of various colors and materials and a paperboy hat. They always get comments. * This troper has a simple black fedora, with five silver rings piercing on side and a skill pinned to the crown. She plans to sew kitty ears on for added awesomeness * [[@/AlirozTheConfused This Troper]] has a very nice hat, and is particulairly known for a fondness of hats.

* [[Tropers/{{MHD}} This Troper]] goes by two nicknames. "Cookie" and "The Mad Hatter." Guess which one relates to head wear. ** [[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} You wear cookies on your head? Oh my god, that is so]] ''[[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} awesome!]]'' * One of this troper's best friends owns a myriad of bucket hats. His roommate also owns about the same amount of baseball caps * [[Tropers/MrDeath This troper]], a newspaper reporter, has a signature cap which is [[{{Retraux}} a fairly simple fedora-shaped straw hat with a card reading "PRESS" paper clipped to the strap]], which always gets commented on, often with the trope name. ** And going off from the Pope's magnificent chapeau, said troper once ran an RP wherein one nation was a monotheistic theocracy, whose god was Capello[[hottip:+:Italian for "hat"]], and the different ranks were the Italian translations for types of hats, like Fuzzy or Yellow. The pope/king equivalent's rank translated as "Gargantuan." * [[Tropers/{{LadyBealzabub}} This Troper]] currently owns a collection of News Boy hats and one trilby. Not many, sadly, due to the fact hats in my size are often very expensive. (Most common commercial hats are too small. I often have to get specialty sizes.) I'm currently looking into the pricing for a Top Hat and green Derby. ** Also one of my friend's boyfriends owns a Top Hat with ''a working clock built into it''. * The autographs in this troper's grade 10 yearbook contains several mentions of how cool her hat was. (Black velvet witch hat with silver stars * and* a stuffed dragon on the brim. No, it wasn't Halloween.) * [[Tropers/{{Guessmyname}} This Troper's]] family is known for making particually NICE hats, come Christmas time. Examples include: ** What was a Jester's hat, with hand-knitted (by us) mice re-enacting the nativity scene attached. Including shepards, sheep, wise men, animals, star and - obviously - the manger. And christmas lights ''which work''. ** A springy christmas hat (literally; the traditional 'pointed' santa hat has the 'point' replaced with a spring), adorned with as many spare Christmas Tree decorations we could find. This includes baubles and tinsel. And more lights. ** A stupidly large comedy floppy top hat that, when at full height on this troper's head, ''will reach the ceiling''. We had to hybridize it with a bike helmet just so it would stop constantly falling off. Not 'Christmasitized' yet, but it's on the list. * As mentioned above, this troper owns - and regularly wears - a top hat. Many of his friends are envious, and a few are planning to buy their own. * [[Tropers/TheMikado This troper]] owns a pimp hat, a russian army hat with medals, an odd ethiopian hat and 2 jester caps. * This troper's friend wears a black fedora-ish hat. Almost all the time. ** So does two of [[This Troper]]'s classmates. It's the same kind of hat some guy from MiamiInk likes to wear. I think. ** This semester I have a bio class called "Principles of the Human Body". My professor sports a very nice hat. Don't know what kind it is but it is indeed nice. ** [[Tropers/{{Im a bell}} I]] perpetually wear a fedora as well,

except mine is grey pinstripe. * [[Tropers/JohnnyBGoode This troper]]'s friend possesses a hat which does not normally qualify, except for the continuous addition of buttons (Many, many buttons) * Ths troper habitually wears a black military beret. Said troper is female, small and cute. ** Please tell me that said troper has short and bouncy bangs to kill for. * This troper wears an ironic tinfoil hat. ** [[Tropers/{{Zelnor}} This Troper]] made himself a lampshading stealth version, molding tinfoil to his head shape, then stapling and gluing it inside a cheap red cap and sewing his own tag over the company logo, which reads "Twilight Corporation Paranoia Hat" is solid black, and scribbled questions and Boyd Cooper dialogue all over it in pencil. He actually feels funny when he wears it. * [[Tropers/GraveDave This troper's]] collection of nice hats includes two fedoras, two bushman's caps, a Gatsby, a derby, a hardhat, over twenty beanies in different colors and styles (some I've altered, I put a [[KingdomHearts zipper]] in one), about a dozen baseball caps, a novelty pimp hat, a novelty mad hatter hat, two aviator caps, a leather bucket hat, a Russian WorldWarTwo helmet and a several pairs of [[GogglesDoNothing goggles]] that I like to mix-andmatch with them. * This Troper is known for wearing many of hats,but his most famous so far is his red black and white hat,that had his internet name on the front of it. * This troper has several, including several touring caps stolen from her dad and/or grandfather, a fedora, and several berets. However, her friend tops her with a hat that used to be a tea cozy, complete with the shapes of the spout and handle, that reads "TEA" on the front of it. * [[Tropers/{{Momonga}} This troper]] owns and wears several vintage velvet hats, some with rhinestones. In a big city, this wouldn't stand out much, but people in her suburban area tend to look impressed and ask if she's an artist (she's not, at least not the visual kind). * [[Tropers/AstraKiseki This troper]] has only three hats, all black. One is a fuzzy long one with long ear flaps that second as a scarf, the second was her dad's fedora (he got sick of her stealing it). The third is a black and gold wizard's hat that she wore to school a lot and got away with wearing it due to it being school colors. It's even empathic; I can make it flop down when I am sad. 8D ** Now all you need is a robe. * [[Tropers/{{morgana006}} This troper]] owns several lovely hats which she rotates between. These include two top hats, one pimp hat, two Cat hats, a green Bowler, [[KingdomHearts heartless]] hat, fireman's helmet, pirate hat, ladies' hat, cowboy hat and a variety of 'normal' hats. * [[Tropers/{{Skazka}} This troper]] has two legitimate nice hats of her own -- a grey beret with a ribbon flower that makes me look like a gloomy little child, and one of those really nice non-newsboy hats, the names of which I'm blanking on. The latter is worn when I [[{{Bifauxnen}} crossdress]]. Though I did get away with wearing a large special-occasion birthday cake hat, complete with candles and

sewn-on puffy icing reading Birthday Girl, that was obviously intended for a small child. I wore that hat all over school. For all my photographs. (Unfortunately, though, I had to take it off for my school ID photo...) ** It's probably the kind called a "flat cap" or "ivy cap" if it's similar enough to be mistaken for a newsboy. * [[Tropers/ManWithoutABody Thie fellow]] owns a Harris Tweed cap with fold-down earflaps, a black mesh cap, a blue-grey conductor cap, a Homburg, a vaguely Panama-ish thing, an Australian Barmah hat, a genuine top hat, a wool-felt tricorn with an oil/wax finish, a peaked bandleader's hat, a striped trilby, a jester hat, a sou'wester, and an Alpine hat with a feather in it. They bring much delight. * [[Tropers/{{Bisected8}} This Troper]] knows a trio of people with nice hats. The first (male) has a black fedora and the other two wear a black (female) and dull green (male) woolen cap. This troper favours goggles, [[WrongGenreSavvy arguing that wearing a hat would take up the same equipment slot]]. "Officially" my own lack of a hat is due to my predisposition to hat hair, but TBH not wearing one is my own personal [[PlanetOfHats ...hat]]. ''[[IncrediblyLamePun Sorry]]''. ** More recently I've occasionally worn a headband. Plus I'm working on a reconstruction of the Thief from ''{{Disgaea}}'''s hat... * [[Tropers/{{Skorpy}} This troper]] eschews hats, but has a Nice Coat instead. A floor-length black longcoat, lined in black silk, made of very soft leather, and cut to flutter dramatically in a wind. It attracts comments. * This troper's favorite-classmate-to-pick-on has a hat that makes him look like a sheep. This is loudly pointed out every time he wears it. * This troper has a quasi-cowboy hat from the Philippines made out of solid wood. * [[Tropers/{{Aranoki}} This troper]] almost always wears her signature tan newsboy hat with red buttons fastened to it. The only times she doesn't wear it? When she's in school (hats aren't allowed in the dress code), or when she's wearing her ''other'' hat, which is red, orange and brown with ear flaps for cold weather. As you can see, she loves hats. * [[Tropers/{{Horngeek}} This troper]] has an Akubra (hat with a rim all the way round, resembles a cowboy/classic Austalian hat) and will wear it whenever he can in summer. Often in winter as well. * This troper has a number of hats and plans to make that number bigger. He owns a trucker hat that says Hardcore in the Coca Cola font, a slightly oversized black fedora, a slightly undersized military cap, two beanies and his favorite a brimmed, green wool beanie. He wants to get a wizard hat(preferably one that looks like the one[[FinalFantasyIX Vivi has]]), a newsboy cap and an avitor hat. * [[Tropers/{{Griffinguy24}} This troper]] has a khaki safari hat He wears it whenever possible. * [[Tropers/KingSonnDeeDoo This Troper]]'s 'mains' (so to speak) three hats. The first is a brown and grey stiped beanie (or tuque, if you wish), with several video-game related badges on it in the shape of a pawprint. [[UnstoppableRage Woe betide anyone who dares steal it, whether she's wearing it, or not.]] The second is a cross between a fisherman's cap, and the sort of hat that the TheNostalgiaCritic

/[[TheWorldEndsWithYou Sho Minamimoto]] wears, and has several cute animal badges on it. The third hat is a a bucket hat, covered in hibiscus flowers. * This troper has a nice trilby. Not an as-nice-as-[[ZeroPunctuation that-one]] one, of course, just a plain-old-nice one. It has feathers in, but that is subject to change. * This troper has two Nice Hats -- a bright red cloche hat with a silver buckle and a gray felt kitty hat (it's a hat with cat ears!). She has worn both of these to class on multiple occasions; the red one in particular is known as the "Hat of Awesomeness" to the people in her Western Civ class. * [[Tropers/JapaneseTeeth This troper]] has a top hat with a giant pheasant feather sticking out of it. He wore it to prom and everyone agreed that it was the best hat ever. Several people attempted to steal it. He also owns several bucket hats, a khaki safari hat, an overly large sombrero, a fuzzy Russian style hat (very warm), a pirate hat, and a snakeskin cowboy hat. He is currently searching for a black fedora and a giant pimp hat. When he finds the pimp hat he plans on putting a peacock feather on it. ** His roomate owns an [[{{Bleach}} Urahara]] cosplay hat. *** This troper also owns an Urahara hat and gets an obscene amount of comments from other guys in his dorm about how cool it is. * Tropers/{{Dark}} got an old hat from his roommate, and it has become his trademark for the past two semesters. [[http://photosg.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-aksnc1/v2251/161/124/1213680075/n1213680075_30066462_2275.jpg See it here!]] * [[Tropers/RobertBingham This troper]]'s primary NiceHat is a black leather cowboy hat that he bought during lunch period on his last day of college. * [[Tropers/SchizoTechnician This Troper]] has a cape cod hat he wears whenever he goes further from his dorm room than the bathroom. Around 60% of the people who comment on it say the trope name, the rest ask if I like fishing (I don't. I like the hat.) * This troper's friend wears a hat with a purple monkey plushie sitting on top of it. * This troper does ''not'' have a NiceHat, but he is saving up for one. He will gleefully describe it as soon as he can find a hat sufficiently awesome. ** He has, however, seen a (presumably joke) hat that consisted of a short plastic top hat with pipecleaner-and-fluffy-ball constructions on top that make it look like a {{Pokemon}} that didn't make the final cut, by someone else in his university residence. ** Update: black trilby; currently considering embellishments. * This troper has an epic and highly respected flatcap. * [[Tropers/TheToonGeekette This troper]] has recently started wearing a tan fedora with a paisley hatband. * [[Tropers/{{Aela}} This troper]] adores her grey fedora, but occasionally swaps it out for a violet cloche, a fuzzy lavender...something, a beret, or the golf hat she stole from her brother. [[CaptainObvious This troper really likes hats.]] * This troper's grandfather had a neat little hat he often wore. Last

time the family was together, we all tried it on. It was too small for all of us... then we all tried on my [[{{Bleach}} Kisuke Urahara]] hat. It was too big for anybody but me. Most people I know at college recognize me by this hat. * This troper loves ska and owns a black and white checkered fedora, and get compliments almost every time he wears it. Unfortunately, it's a bit too small, so he doesn't wear it often. * This troper was so attached to her hat (a grey Gatsby cap that eventually was supplemented by two more caps and a black fedora) and trench jacket that it became an easier way of recognising her than her actual body. A MALE friend who looked nothing like her once wore these two items, and was MISTAKEN for her by another friend. Now-a-days, she just gets called 'Rorschach', and the old 'Nice hat' line from time to time. * [[Tropers/JChance This troper]] wears a rather "personalised" (i.e. bent out of shape with the brim distinctly pulled down over his left eye) black fedora almost every time he goes outside. He bought it for purely practical reasons--his face was sunburning [[WeaksauceWeakness on the walk between parking lot and classroom]]. * [[Tropers/InsanityInside This troper]] has knitted herself a Klein bottle hat. * This male troper owns a pink felt fedora. All he needs now is an outfit designed to be worn with it. * This troper's college pep band has a hat of the member's choice as part of its official uniform. The sillier, the better. This troper's hat of choice was a giant foam hot dog, to the point that he was infamous among the fans for it (he admits he bought it solely for the [[FreudWasRight Freudian implications.]]) He has seen hollowed-out computer monitors, Dr. Pepper cases (which expanded into a pyramid almost as tall as the person wearing it,) guys wearing tiaras, and many others. * This troper has a thing for wearing beat up fedoras, a habit he stole from his brother. * [[Tropers/SovietKitty This troper]] has a [[KingdomHearts Heartless]] hat, a gray-and-black, houndstooth bucket hat, and many others. Her purple papakha, however, seems to be permanently attached to her head. * This troper has a thing for hats. She has a Top Hat, an old German Police officers cap, A leather Flying Helmet (and goggles), A fleece black beanie with multi coloured spikes, a "boonie" hatin olive khaki, a Trigun Cat Hat, a bear ear hat with skull motif and a jester hat. * [[Tropers/MutantRancor This troper]] has found a NiceHat ''shop.'' Here's a link. http://www.villagehatshop.com/ If you live in Europe, there's a link from that site to a sister site that sells hats there, but the site, as far as I know, only sells to North America. ** Note: to get to the European sister site, click "Locations" and there should be a link near the top of that page. Otherwise, just click here: http://www.hatsandcaps.co.uk/ ** Recently I got an Asian conical hat from there. I've gotten a "nice hat" every time I've worn it outside. * This troper lives in the American Southwest, but instead of a classic cowboy hat, I habitually wear an Australian-style Outback hat

-- something like Indy's hat with a wider brim. It looks pretty darn good on me, if I say so myself, and I get about one "Nice hat!" a week from random strangers. * ThisTroper got a hat at DisneyWorld that is something of a Safari Hat. He refers to it as his Rain Hat or Traveling Hat, as he only wears it when he works in the rain or is on a trip. He did spend a lot of time around a pool with it on, which makes it look like a cowboy hat in the shadows. His brother has a collection of baseball caps (mostly from his favorite team) hanging in his bedroom. * This troper wears an official Indiana Jones fedora. Slight subversion on the "nice" bit as every one of his close friends thinks it makes him look like Freddy Krueger (it doesn't help I like to wear stripes, either.) * This troper inherited his grandfather's gray fedora. Thought it the coolest hat ever as a boy. * Let's see, my hat collection... Two trilbies, one black and slightly oversized, the other black-and-white striped and smaller; a brown flatcap with white, black, and bronze-colored stripes; a navy blue "Bell Walk For Kids" bucket hat with yellow on the inside, an old favorite; a tan patrol cap-like hat with a paper Canadian flag taped to the front; for the winter, there's two knitted tuques, one dark green and the other speckled-earthy-colors; a long green knitted stocking cap (the '[[LegendofZelda Link hat]]') and a black ski mask with a yellow-and-red 'X' symbol on the the forehead, made for a [[XMen Multiple Man]] halloween costume. I'd also like to get, eventually, a pith helmet, an Akubra, a tam o'shanter, and a fedora. ** MutantRancor again. You can get Pith helmets and fedoras of several varieties at Village Hat Shop. Never heard of those other two, but you can probably find them there too. *** Thanks, I'll check that out. Akubra is a brand name Australian hat, I think one was mentioned above. Tam o'shanters are those Scottish hats that golfers always wear in cartoons. What I'd really like I'd to get one in my mom's clan tartan (I know there are 'tartan guidelines' against this. I don't care). *** They sell several brands there, including their own (Jaxon Hats), but I don't think Akubra is one of them. They do, however, have that ''style'', if you don't mind wearing Indiana Jones brand instead of the real thing. If you're referring to the same kind of golfer that I'm thinking of, you should look for "flat cap" or "ivy cap." I don't think they do custom jobs, though, so finding one in any specific tartan may be difficult. (Having so little Scottish blood in me that I don't even remember what miniscule fraction it is, I don't know anything about tartan.) ** OP again, with a hat update. The Bell Walk hat is slowly being covered in buttons, to be worn at conventions, and the flag has fallen off the patrol cap. It has been replaced by my welding goggles; I call this combination my "Science Hat", although I've never actually done anything scientific in it. I like to wear it with my longcoat and vest so I look steampunkish. * ThisTroper wears a newsboy cap everywhere she goes; it provokes both compliments and ViewerGenderConfusion. * This troper has a 2 Super Mario Brothers 3 hats, one with colored

artwork of many scenes and enemies, and a similar black and white artwork one with a colorful Mario print. He often wear the 1st one simply because it fits better. * This troper cannot fit any manner of hat over his [[FunnyAfro hair]], but his friend owns a [[{{Pokemon}} Groudon]] hat. That he has worn to class on several occasions. We're starting to get worried about him. * [[Tropers/{{starshine}} This troper]] owns 18 hats (not including baseball caps), including a MichaelJackson-esque white fedora, a plaid cap as worn by a bagpipe player, a top hat, and a vintage pillbox. Her collection is still growing and she pretty much always wears one. * This troper has a bright-red and black flatcap with goggles and an anime badge. * [[Tropers/{{Haruko}} This troper]] wears a hat adorned with fox ears, and badges attached to it, pretty much everywhere. * This troper is well known for his blue and white and black and white traditional keffiyehs in the summer, late spring and early fall. He's also known for his white papahki and ushanka in the winter and early spring, late fall. This isn't even mentioning his absurdly large kippahs. * While not as unique or typical of the trope, [[Tropers/{{Xaris}} this troper]] has recently taken to wearing a bandanna in a full head covering style for a few reasons, the first to help keep his long hair out of his eyes, the second to give him a somewhat unique look and the third because he likes what it looks like. * [[Tropers/ThirtyTwoFootsteps This troper]] is almost never without a beat-up walkabout that has been sunbleached to black with mottled brown and rust red scattered throughout. He's so identified with this hat that one friend simply put it on for Halloween, and everyone knew the friend was going as the troper for Halloween. * This troper has a freind whose irrefutable trademark is his black fedora. When he needs to hide from someone angry or dosen't want people to identify him, he simply takes off the hat. This troper has taken to, when quoting said freind in an anecdote, pausing, stealing and putting on the hat, saying the relevant quote, then giving it back. * This troper, following a day when she wore a black witch's hat with a stuffed dragon perched on the brim, actually had a number of people sign her yearbook with variations on "Nice hat". * This troper has a pair of mementos from the [[GloriousMotherRussia Soviet Union]]: a truly intimidating CommissarCap of the sort only authoritarian states can produce, and my great, big, wonderfully warm [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Papakha Papakhi]]. Both become [[PuttingOnTheReich quite terrifying]] when combined with a [[BadassLongcoat trenchcoat]]. * This (female) troper has a black mafia style fedora, a houndstooth hat with no less then 4 patterns checker boarded across it, a sparkly black tophat, a great amount of mini tophats, a hat of unknown type that makes her look like a young french male chimney sweep, a large collection of wool winter caps, and a novely hat for every occasion * This Troper hails from the SF Bay Area, and once went to a ball game (Oakland A's vs SF Giants) where they were giving out caps with the

Giants' logo on one side and the A's logo on the other. Since he doesn't care about sports enough to choose between the two, the hat is cool since it shows ''both'' local teams, and he's worn it to a few A's/Giants games since. (Of course, at the last one, he heard some StopHavingFunGuys shouting to "Get off the fence!") Oh, and he'll be getting a SuperMario hat from Club Nintendo in a month or two. * This troper's sister has a black homburg with red cherries on it, bought in a Traverse City, MI store devoted to cherry-themed things. * ...Urahara's hat from "Bleach" donned with 5 [[TheWorldEndsWithYou TWEWY pins]]. * Not sure if this belongs here, but this troper has a friend with a wide array of nice ''pants''. Some notable ones include white with french words written on them, and a pair of jeans entirely covered in ''duct tape''. It goes without saying that this friend is labeled "the guy with all the weird pants" at school. This friend has a penchant for wearing "less than casual" things to school, including a very nice gold and black cravat. * This troper has The Ribbon Hat, a dark green cap with a white ribbon weaved into one side and various buttons and small metal objects sewn onto it (she added the ribbon and buttons herself). She gets complimented on it every time she wears it. Sadly, it's starting to get too small, so she's saving up to purchase herself a trilby. * I have two nice hats; a black trilby and a panama that looks almost exactly like the one from the ''Smooth Criminal'' video from a distance. * A kid in [[Tropers/{{Odile}} this troper's]] school's jazz band has a pretty awesome [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ushanka ushanka]]. We don't even live in a particularly cold place, but it still looks neat. * This troper is becoming known as "The Hatta" due to his ability to return from trips, even to the next town over, with a ridicoulus hat the collection now includes: A mario hat, a sombrero, a black trilby, a fedora, a pink childs dappy hat, a neon yellow dappy hat, a wollen cap that has the pattern of of a panda head on it, a russian hat and his crowning glory the shiniest top hat you've ever seen! * [[Tropers/{{Miso}} This one]] has ''two'' nice hats. The first one is a black fedora-ish one that has gray pinstripe and is her main hat. She is rarely seen without it in public. The other one is a top hat that she hasn't worn in public quite yet, but whenever she puts it on her parents decide to start calling her [[{{ptitlewiz5pz1p}} Slash]] and won't stop until she takes it off. ** Update: FOUR nice hats. The previous two, a SonicTheHedgehog beanie given to my as a Christmas present from a friend, and another fedoralike solid black one, given as a Valentine's Day gift from my mother. The latter got a 'I like your hat!' the first day she wore it out. * This troper has a black hat. She doesn't know the model, and often gets a compliment (from teachers). Most stupid teenagers yell "hey, it's Michael Jackson!" when they see her. * This troper recently bought a hat. It's white with black stripes, made of furry fabric, and shaped so that it almost looks like it has pointy ears at the top. Despite this it actually fits under a bicycle helmet, something she appreciates greatly. And it has these things hanging from it, which are long enough to work as a scarf. It is also

warm, and covers this troper's ears nicely when it gets cold here. She likes it very much. * This tropette now has a nice, fuzzy black beret. Nice! * This Troper has taken to wearing a fuschia colored fedora. Checkered, fuschia and black colored fedora. I plan to top it off with a monacle one day. * In college, this troper was known as The Guy With The Hat. It's a simple black leather wide brimmed hat. I like it because it keeps light from my eyes and rain from my head. After a few years of wearing it most every day, it was pretty much my nickname among people I had never, and still have not, met. It's weird hearing stories about yourself being referred to like that. * [[Tropers/{{Quillpaw}} This troper]] has a very nice black and white and gray plaid-patterned trilby, interlaced with shiny thread and some small buttons along the strap embossed with different coats of arms. In fact, it is such a NiceHat that even the most anal teacher at school doesn't have the heart to tell her to take it off in the building. As a subtle joke, she tends to wear it with her favorite tshirt that shows a stylized picture of [[ChzoMythos a priestess performing a demon-summoning ritual]]. * This troper owns a familiar-looking [[OnePiece straw hat]]. It's earned him several positive comments from classmates and teachers alike. Due to size complications, however, he prefers to use a string strap to hang it from around his neck. * Just looking around her room, this troper sees a black straw trilby (currently having its band replaced with one made from a man's colorful necktie), a [[NightmareBeforeChristmas Jack Skellington]] baseball cap from a trip to Disney, a crocheted (by me) beanie in muted rainbow colors (with matching scarf and FingerlessGloves) a crocheted (also by me) purple beret that is the softest thing in the world, a natural straw floppy beach hat, a crocheted (not by me) pimp hat in the local football team's colors, and a Mardi-Gras wreath of flowers and ribbons (not technically a hat, but still kitschy and fun). She also has two brought back from computer conventions: a navy newsboy with the Windows logo on the back, and a red fedora from, well, [[CaptainObvious Red Hat]]. ** This troper's (same as above) boyfriend also owns a black trilby (although his is cloth) and we tend to wear them when out and about and dressed up together. At the homecoming dance we officially became the "Epic Hat Couple". * This troper is a member of a science-fiction fan club, and we've declared that you cannot truly be the good kind of geek until you have a Nice Hat. This troper favours her late grandfather's [[http://www.tilley.com/ Tilley hat]] with [[BadassLongcoat matching trenchcoat]], while her best friend prefers a tricorn. * [[Tropers/RobinZimm This troper]] has a lovely soft felt hat for winter purposes, with a high crown and Tyrolean brim (turned up at the back). * [[Tropers/{{T-Jack}} This troper]] has a black fedora to complement his Cool Coat. He's been told bumerous times that he looks like a typical gangster. I believe that this trope is the only good reason to ever get a hat.

* [[Tropers/SabresEdge This troper]] customarily wears a desertpattern boonie hat, self-modified to sport a black headband with the Screaming Eagles badge in front and a white feather sticking up on the side. He usually (but not always) wears it with the sides buttoned up. AwesomeYetPractical, too, as it provides very, very welcome relief during summer. It's gotten to the point that he jokes about being invisible without it. There was no shortage of Nice Hats in his high school marching band: beanies, patrol caps, and at least one Ushanka, plus too many bandannas and baseball caps to count, in addition to the aforementioned hat. ** Update: said troper now alternates between the boonie and an octagonal woodland-BDU cap, which is [[BoringButPractical lowermaintenance due to the lack of the feather]], and waterproof to boot. The new cap [[ItWasAGift was a gift]] from his former academic team; he plans alter it to fit a headlamp. Annnd...add another hat, this one a black trilby that would go well on more formal occasions. So a total of three Nice Hats, and possibly more on the way. * [[Tropers/TheNerdyNinja This Troper]] owns a few bucket hats, but his personal favorite is designed to look like a smiling ladybug. * [[Tropers/{{LoneCentrist}} This troper]] wears a cap like the one John Lennon wore often, such as on the cover "In His Own Write" and in A Hard Days Night. * This troper's previous attempts at obtaining a NiceHat have all ended in disaster, i.e. they end up looking like a twit, according to other people anyway. However, they are not discouraged and plan on making what they've dubbed the 'Anti-Hat', so called because Urahara's bucket hat is The Hat, therefore a bucket hat with the same stripy pattern in red and black would be it's equal and opposite. ** Update: This troper is now planning on doing a Jaeger cosplay at a convention in November. Enough said. * This troper knows the person behind the account {{Aranoki}}. On her page it says she owns a Nice Hat or two. This is a LIE. Aranoki OWNS LIKE A BILLION HATS AND THEY ARE NOT NICE THEY ARE FUCKING AWESOME. Everyone else on this page should just curl up and die because Aranoki owns the best hats ever. End of story. * Four Words. Bunny Ear Top Hat. Jealous? * This troper has come to wear hats, usually trilbies, newsboys or fisherman caps so much that multiple people have joked on seperate occassions that the headwear is clearly a shapeshifting eldritch abomination of some sort, and I'm essentially the equivalent of one of its limbs. * This troper has a very nice fedora hat that's black and red, from Claires' Alice in Wonderland collection. It's pretty nice. * [[Tropers/DarkInsanity13 This troper]] doesn't have that many nice hats (most are baseball caps with random computer logos on them thanks to her dad), and she doesn't wear them very often, but she owns [[{{Bleach}} Urahara's hat]], a [[KingdomHearts Shadow Heartless]] plush hat, and two newsboy caps, a black one with a floppy bill and a beige one with a stiff bill with square studs on one side. Her brother owns a fedora, as does half the male population of their school (since there's a kiosk in the nearby mall that sells them and other nice hats).

* Tropers/SunnyV's tenth grade history teacher had a fedora, which he let other people wear sometimes. His classes were as [[CoolTeacher cool]] as his hat, incidentally--he also taught poetry, and would sometimes merge the two. Also, the whole class had a habit of [[CloudCuckooLander segue-ing into philosophy.]] * This troper's life goal is to obtain a Nice Hat. As of now, I own a baseball cap that brigns bad luck, or th removal of brings good luck while bowling for the first time, i took off my hat partway through and promptly got 3 strikes in a row. One of these was occidentally bowled for someone else on my team, but I still beat them. But I kinda got worse after that. I guess you could say i had 3 strikes...(puts on shades)..and I was out. ** YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH! * This Troper is intending to buy a Rorschach hat for this year's London Film & Comic Con...and will not let it off his head. Would've bought an Indiana Jones fedora but he couldn't find a suitable one cheap enough and in his area (can't order stuff online). ** Update: Troper has obtained the hat. And it is awesome. * [[Tropers/{{Numbuh9494}} This Troper]] knows a guy who wears a different English hat to school every day. She has dubbed him Hat Guy. This Troper also has a ushanka she wears to school regularly (and started a fashion statement with it too) and a Christmas hat with light-up stars that will give you a seizure, which she also wears regularly. And both these people wear the hats simply because they look cool. * After acquiring a lovely brown felt fedora earlier this year, [[ParadoxicalFrog I]] have decided to start collecting hats. (Partly just for the hell of it, partly so I can call myself a Mad Hatter.) So far I only have three -- the aforementioned fedora, a newsboy hat with glittery threads sewn into it, and a conductor's cap that I plan to cover in buttons -- but that is likely to increase at least once a month at the rate I'm going. Wish me luck! * [[{{Tropers/Deadbeatloser22}} This Troper]] has a Celtic-print bandanna that recently migrated from my neck to my head, along with an {{NCIS}} baseball cap. * I myself sport a flatcap, representing my pride in my northernEnglish heritage, and a trilby which I do a neat flippy-trick with. * I own a fez. ** [[Series/DoctorWho Fezzes are cool.]] * This (female) troper loves hats. She owns three old-school fedoras, a Soviet cap, various baseball caps, two flat caps, one of those furry communist hat things. I aspire to own a bowler, a top hat, and then one day, I walk into town rocking my WaistcoatOfStyle and looking like a Bond Villain. * This female troper usually wears her hair in braids (read: weave) but hasn't coughed up the cash to get them redone in a while. For about a month and a half, she's been wearing a Du-Rag on her untamed hair until she finally got sick of it and noticed that Wal-Mart had a sale: Fedora Hats for $8. In the first two days of wearing said hat, this troper received six compliments--three of which were from perfect strangers. Hot damn. CoolHat indeed. Maybe if she's levels up some more, she can graduate to the Mack Daddy of all Cool Hats: that which

is owned by Raylan Givens on FX's ''Justified''. A girl can dream. * This troper owns no less than three quality felt fedoras, two black and one grey. He also ha a top hat that matches nicely with his suit. * This troper owns two fur-felt fedoras (One black and very high quality, one brown for more everyday wear), four flat caps of varying styles and colors, a military-style beret, and a floppy Renaissance hat which is extremely comfortable and has been christened "The Drinking Hat". * I bought a [[{{Firefly}} Jayne hat]] from a con earlier this year. Ironically, when I wear it I get compliments from people who have no idea it's a fandom reference, ''they honestly think it's a nicelooking hat.'' * This Troper recently purchased a skipper's hat (which looks like a navy cap) which has received this reaction, to the extent that he has to pretty much point out that he did have a haircut and get a new coat as well for it to be spotted. Not even joking there, a friend of mine who sits on the same bus as me didn't realise I'd had a haircut until I took off the hat. Neither did he comment on the new coat. * [[{{Tropers/KennyMan666}} This troper]] has tried and failed to acquire a NiceHat of his own, in part due to having a large head and a thick layer of hair on top of it, thus he has not yet been able to find anything that comfortably slides into place on his thick skull. Back in the day, he wore a fisherman's style hat with a camo pattern wherever he went - he still owns it, but years of battle damage to it and the fact that it doesn't quite fit his new look has left it literally hanging as a memento of former days. His girlfriend, however, has a very nice hat - a black officer's cap model, which originally had only a skull and crossbones (not a pirate flag, though) on the front, but has since been pimped out with both chains and a pair of black goggles. The goggles, presumably, [[GogglesDoNothing do nothing]] but add to the awesomeness. * I have a beret and a Fedora. They'll soon be more than that, just wait. * [[Tropers.DescendantOfShinobi This troper]] has a Toby Keith cowboy hat made of paper. It has the autographs of TravisWillingham, LauraBailey, and VicMignogna on it, along with a pair of Orihime bobby pins. She calls it her Hat of +5 Awesome, and used it to catch Milky Way Darks when Vic threw candy out to his autograph line. * This troper just ordered a handmande Link hat. Needless to say, when it arrives, she will wear it every day. EVERY DAY. * [[Tropers.RobinFiredrake This troper]] just got for his fifteenth birthday, a hat made by his sister. It is a steampunk wizard's pointed hat, painted brass, with chains and cogs on it. It has glasses dangling from the brim, and a hook to hold them out of the way if I need to, a dangling flashlight to the side, and a working radio and headphones. That, is one nice hat. * [[Tropers.DoctorRedgrave This troper]] possess a white trilby with a black band, given to him by his brother-in-law. It's simply brilliant.

* Recently, there was a hat day at this troper's school. One gut wore a Christmas tree hat that lit up, sang, and danced. * I have a Mokona hat. My brother has a Pikachu hat. My sister has a panda hat. And one of my friends has a Bun-bun hat (Momiji's bunny). They all look cute. * My dad has a Nice Hat which causes open warfare between me and my siblings, as wearing it is the sign that today, that child can get away with anything. * At a wedding this troper was at, the bride wore a jaunty white fedora instead of a veil. * This troper's friend has a woolly hat shaped like a moose. That's right. A moose. Don't get amused. Wearing The Moose is very serious business amongst our people. For a power upgrade, one should wear The Moose whilst holding or drinking juice, therefore becoming a "Juice Moose". * I never leave the house without my trusty olive-green outback hat, I always say a gentleman isn't properly dressed without his hat. When other people say it's a nice hat I respond, "I know, that's why I wear it." * I have been well known for my large collection of trilbys. * This Tropette is known for loving her purple handmade beanie. * My best friend loves hats. She is tiny, with bright red hair and wears a top hat! My hats both have animals on, I have the bunny one, and the bear one-they both have ears on it, and a face. They are so cute! * This troper has an owl hat that she has gotten a lot of compliments about. * This Troper has an awesome hat that all the ladies want for some reason. see it [[http://i228.photobucket.com/albums/ee91/van_the_baron/1280202175.jpg here]] ** He also recently got a stetson from Branson, Mo. * [[Tropers.JRSpaniel This troper]] has a simple, plain white bucket hat he got for a birthday present a few years back. It still has the tag on it that just says "Hat". He also has the materials to make a beanie with his fursona's ears. * This troper has a red knit beanie. Bright, bright red. She had to wear it one day when she couldn't find her black one, and from that day forward it has been known as THE HAT. It demands respect. Fear it. * [[Tropers/LokiLie-Smith This troper]] has recently purchased a magnificent fedora. Simply looking at it makes him happy. * Thus far, this troper has acquired a number of hats. He has one witches style hat, three flat caps, a Gatsby cap, a black fedora, a tan one he calls his Aussie hat, a brown hat that sort of looks like one worn by orthodox Jews, and a Santa hat he will only wear from December 1st till the end of Christmas day. The thing people find ABNORMAL is when I DON'T have a hat on. One day, I hope to get a top hat and a trucker hat. Really though, I'd just like to get as many

hats as possible. ** I have acquired four new hats, (in order of obtaining) a black hat that is ALSO sort of an Aussie hat, a TOP HAT bought in ENGLAND (WOO HOO!!), a black trucker hat with a white jack-o-lantern on the front, and a baseball hat for NIU. * This Troper has finally found a nice hat that fits him! It's a gray wool blend J. Crew trilby and it was the only one in my size. SCORE! * This Troper has over 31 hats. She's been collecting them for almost seven years. There are people who have never seen her without a hat. The nicest hats are the top hat and the fez, which she only got so she could say, [[Series/DoctorWho "I wear a fez now. Fezzes are cool."]] Also, fezzes ''are'' cool. * This troper has a felt three-piece hat of a bluebird that he never wore because he was supposed to wear it at a croquet tournament. * This troper owns at least four Nice Hats. However, she does not often wear them. * [[Tropers/SukiSelfDestruct This troper]] has a hat, that would just be a normal hat (albeit, a pretty cool one, with fake patches and neat buttons on it) that moves in to NiceHat territory because it is covered with pins. 25 at the moment, exactly, and that's carrying capacity unless I start putting them on the top. Also, it was signed by HenryRollins. * This troper (The Irregular) needed a hat to go with professional wear, and picked up a water-resistant [[http://www.orvis.com/store/product.aspx?pf_id=7910 brown felt fedora]] at an outdoor store. It stands up well in the rain, goes well with a business suit or long coat, combines with a bomber jacket for a fairly proper IndianaJones look, and has been referred to by third parties as a NiceHat. * This troper works an office job during the week and snowboards on the weekends. Her "day job" outerwear usually consists of a long, black wool coat, a dark red knitted scarf, black gloves and a grey beret, but one time she mislaid the beret. Since it was too cold to go without, she had to put on the tuque she usually wears on the slopes green with three googly eyes and a purple mohawk on the top. Her fellow commuters were highly amused. * This troper has two fedoras: one blue, more casual fedora, and one black, more formal fedora. He also got fedoras for each of his two sisters for Christmas. Yep, fedoras are the universal NiceHat. * [[Tropers/TheMadArab This troper]] wears a fedora-like hat of which the name continues to elude me, every time he goes out. Every. Time. Also have a fondness for all kinds of headthingies, ranging from turbans to weird hairstyles. * [[Tropers/GamerFromJump My]] dad had one I liked to call the "[[IndianaJones Indiana]] John" hat. * Amongst my most recent finds are a neat black fedora and, just today, an awesome black top hat which is apparently quite dapper on me. I might cosplay Professor Layton with it... still looking for a fez, alas. * One of the many reasons why MiniKaylee's grandmother is awesome: [[Series/DoctorWho Tardis hat]].

** Pictures, or it doesn't exist. * [[Tropers/DialgaX This Troper]] has a fondness for boonie hats. He has one that says Hawaii on it and depicts a lounging gecko. * [[Tropers/{{Hukky}} This troper]] doesn't have one yet, but he plans to get a nice black fedora and wear it everywhere if he comes across one. * [[Tropers/TacoNinja Taco Ninja]] (fairly) recently discovered that she has a head for hats. I have two right now, I'm planning on getting more: A black trilby with a sparkly swallow brooch and a black cloche with a big flower and an adorable little bumblebee pin. I'm jealous of my [[LandDownUnder Down Under]] friend's hats. He has an octopus hat that looks like [[{{Pokemon}} Octillery]], a doggie hat, a rainbow beanie, a hobobeanie and a [[CrazyAwesome purple top hat]]. * I have a big black tophat. I'm wearing it right now, along with my long green [[ScarfOfAssKicking]]. * This troper owns a black bowler which he loves very much. He also intends to buy a top hat when the chance presents itself. Oh, and he has a bobble hat with a smiley face on it. * This troper has a number of [[NiceHat Nice Hats]]; his personal favorite is a blue velvet top hat. * This tropette owns a number of different hats including an ORLY hat from Gaia Online, a blue and white jester hat bought at a band competition, a brown Newsboy cap, a bucket hat, three knit berets, and two knit hats, one of which is shaped like a penguin. * [[@/{{Seiryu}} I]] have a nice, black fedora. On occasion, I'll take it, and put it on someone else's head for laughs and the bemusement of everyone present. * This troper has three: A black fedora with a pinstripe strap, a brown and black beret, and a Rasta hat. For all you Yankee fans out there, I've got a beat-up black NY cap that, for some reason or another, always gets a compliment whenever I wear it. (Also, I've got three pairs of CoolShades for each hat: MIB square shades for my fedora, LennonSpecs for my Rasta hat, and [[TheGogglesDoNothing goggles]] for my beret ((the look works, I swear!)).) ---Go put on your NiceHat. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NiceJobBreakingItHero * As an activity in one of this troper's classes, the professor introduced a scenario of a man living in a small Chinese village in 500 AD and told us that if we unanimously chose to kill him, there would be world peace. Naturally, it was impossible to come to a unanimous decision in a class of opinionated college students, and in fact most people were adamantly in favor of letting him live. More and more details were added to his story -- he committed some petty crimes in his youth, his village is experiencing a famine, etc. -- but we continued to vote in favor of sparing this man's life, in spite of some lively debate, even if it put world peace out of reach. Finally,

we were told he was diagnosed with a fatal illness and was given just 20 days to live and managed to kill him off with a slim majority. The final message the professor read to us was both poetic and euphemistic: "All of us have a candle to guide the world. When you chose to put this Mandarin man's candle out, in turn the flames of all of our candles were put out. Congratulations. World peace." This troper half-expected to hear this page's title at the end of it. ** Did nobody ask ''why'' there'd be world peace if you killed an otherwise insignificant man? I mean, it sounds pretty illogical. *** We did ask, but we weren't given any information that wasn't on the card. It was supposed to be an issue of morality, not practicality. Of course, the point was kind of rendered defunct after we found out we were tricked... ** ...[[UnfortunateImplications this mandarin's mancandle]]? *** [[SchmuckBait You do not]] [[{{Squick}} want to know how we put it out]] ** This is the sort of question that can only be answered with TroperTales/GenreSavvy, really. "Don't kill him, because that's the obvious answer!" ** It still doesn't make sense. ** How did you get "a slim majority" on what had to be a unanimous decision? *** Forgot to add this...We had to bargain with the teacher for her to allow us to end the exercise with a majority for the final card. A good chunk of the class was just interested in leaving class early. ** Seems to me like an abstraction of an (more or less) old ethic experiment which goes something like this: If an empty train would head full speed right into a train station full of people where it would crash, killing many of them and only you could rescue them by setting a switch to guide the train to another railtrack, would you do it? Yes, obviously. But there's a twist: Theres a man standing on the other, unused railtrack whitout knowing what's going on, so you would kill him if you tried to rescue the other people. Would you still do it? The logical answer would be "yes", but most people answer "no". The example with the Chinese man above seems to be similar. *** Train tracks aren't very wide, and you said the guy was just standing there. If he doesn't have the sense to simply step off the tracks to get out of the way, then maybe he really was TooDumbToLive. *** Seconded. what's he doing on the rails anyway? better him than a station full of people minding their own business ** Sounds like it teaches more about dealing with a LiteralGenie than anything about ethics. ** In fact, such a small change in the past would [[ButterflyEffect create a ripple in time]], so no one living today would've been born at all. So the professor was right. *** He only had twenty days to live. Not much would be accomplished in twenty days. ** SpaceWhaleAesop, anyone? ** Did anyone ask what the man thought? Some people, if told his or her death would result in world peace, would consent to death. ** Actually, since the professor knew what was going to happen, but chose not to tell despite being a human himself, he was the one who

did a NiceJobBreakingItHero : destroying humanity by choosing not to tell all he knows if it were real, and from a teaching point of view, turning an interesting ethical debate (Are you allowed to kill innocents to save others, and if so, [[UtopiaJustifiesTheMeans how many]]?) into a pre-determined YouBastard with plenty of FridgeLogic. You can either have an ethical dilemma or a practical dilemma. Pure ethics is only applicable when you have all the information, and if this were a practical dilemma, your professor would be at fault for hiding significant information. You didn't commit the heinous act, your professor did. * This troper was part of a weird exercise where a bunch of characters were made up and put in a situation, we would all try to change the world in small ways to get the characters to do what we wanted. Unfortunately, we all liked one character and not the other. The character interpreted our extremely frequent messages as some kind of omnipresent being trying to watch and control him (oops) and ended up completely flipping out and killing all of the other characters before being gunned down by the police. * This troper had a Calculus class where the teacher was going to give about twenty minutes of lecture before handing out the weekly quiz, after which we were free to go. So said troper talked her into skipping the lecture for another day and just giving us the quiz so we could leave earlier. The teacher agreed... only for us to find out that her planned lecture included an example of a problem that was in the quiz, that we had never gone over otherwise. Derp. * this troper once cleaned up all the dishes for his mom .It was all fine until I got to this one pan filled with grease. I dumped it out and cleaned it. When she got home she told me she needed that grease to cook something and dumping it in the sink could clog it up. * In an RP on fanfiction.net, Welcome to Planaria, [[TheHero Kouya]] breaks basically everything. Yeah, that cool guy there with the glasses, Cormac? [[XanatosGambit He has been using you to get his enemies off his back]] so he could summon an EldritchAbomination, [[DidYouJustPunchOutCthulhu drain the abomination of its power]], and then pass along the power to some idiot with a God Complex, all to make himself look like TheHero when he kills said idiot DeaderThanDead and make Kouya look like the BigBad in the process. Thanks for killing the Five Aura Knights, Kouya, thanks a lot. * This troper is a bassoonist. Couple her clumsiness with the fact that bassoon reeds break if you so much as look at them the wrong way, and you have a very bad combination. A little while ago, she ordered three bassoon reeds from the internet; two of which broke. She used the good one for a couple of weeks, and decided that she should try breaking in one of the bad reeds. She then proceeded to adjust aforementioned bad reed. And then she realised that she just adjusted her good reed. Now she is stuck with one leaky reed, one reed that plays too sharply and loudly, and one completely useless reed. And there's a concert in two days. And band festival in a week. * On this one site I was on there was a discussion where someone said a radical feminist claimed ALL males are the root of every problem and they should ALL be eliminated (as in zero males are around anymore). In the interest of proving this to be retarded I played the genie who

granted the wish. All men are gone, along with the evils they apparently caused... and the ability to create future generations to live in this utopia. I can't exactly say the feminist is a hero, but she did a nice job of breaking "it" in this fictional situation. ** There would still be sperm around. And pregnant women. *** All men would probrably include fetuses with an XY chromosome, thus meaning they would be gone. And plus the sperm left behind wouldn't last forever. * This troper had to help his dad fix a well pump that his dad had run over a few months earlier. * This troper's sister once hung up when some random person who she didn't know called our house. Normally, that would be fine, except for the fact that this person was calling to confirm if we wanted our only garage door fixed. I will also mention that our only car was stuck inside our garage because of this. Yeah. * Some people call this troper lazy. I'm not; I'm just a living embodiment of this trope. The people who know me are always quick to say, 'Thank you for offering, but we've got it handled. Go read your book/play on your computer/sit in the corner out of our way.' When I finally convince the people who don't know me that I am willing to help, it usually doesn't take them long to tell me the same thing. I remember I once broke up an argument in middle school by beginning to cut something for home ec. class. One of the boys noticed what I was doing, immediately backed out of the argument, and demanded I carefully hand the knife over before I hurt myself. * Here in the UK we have a Referendum on the voting system coming up. I'm jaded and disillusioned with all politics and was going to not vote (counting as a small "No" vote) I was not sold at all by the "Yes" campaigner who spoke to me. It was only when a "No" campaigner spoke to me and insinuated pompously that I(And all voters) was too stupid to understand AV and couldn't vote intelligently thus should vote no. (Oh I understood it I just didn't care) I was so offended and furious at this clown talking to me like that I switched sides to "Yes" PERSUASION FAIL! ** Averted. The "No" campaign won that referendum. * The PowerRangers, VRTroopers, and BeetleBorgs series all got added to Netflix [[PowerRangersSamurai (except the latest season of Rangers)]]. Saban Brands then took down most other (illegal) sources of the shows, which apart from MightyMorphinPowerRangers are off air and thus a case of KeepCirculatingTheTapes. Those of us who don't live in the United States and thus can't access Netflix are pissed off to say the least. Nice job alienating the fandom, Saban. ---Go back to [[Main/NiceJobBreakingItHero Nice Job Breaking It Hero]] before you...aww, now look what you did! ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NightmareDreams * I just had this dream, all I remember is that somehow I was flying

towards the moon, and there was this giant yellow red glazed over eye in the moons rock. And its eyelashes were also stiches that held the eye open. and above the eye (which just stared at you...It was creepy) there was a table and two chairs and I flew down into one. And there was some other person who's left eye looked exactly like the eye in the moon and above it was a table and two chairs. * [[Hellscourge This troper] had just recently a nightmare that somehow meshed together Jurassic Park, your Standard Happy Disney Family movie with Talking animals and a sort of Resident Evil thing. To sum it up, dinosaurs were pets for the people and everything was good until a virus turned them all into flesh eating monsters that could talk. A special Unit was called in to depose of the Matriarch of them because once the Matriarch is dead they all would vanish as well. However there was one oddball, owned by this troper, who resisted the virus and tried to help. Eventually the Matriarch was dead, so was most of the team with only me and my pet surviving.. as it starts to die as well.. The skin starts to shriuvel and the flesh rots while the poor thing was fully consciouss and screaming for its Mommy, which lay bitten in half besides it. This troper woke up afterwards and just stared at the wall for twenty minutes traight, unable to get back to sleep. * This troper has had some pretty vivid nightmares in the past, and he remembers them fully. Worse than the typical horror story nightmares though, this troper will have {{Adult Fear}}-style dreams, where the situations are highly believable and also crushingly horrible (Think of missing an exam completely or having your girlfriend constantly cheating on you but not caring at all how much it hurts you). Oh, and did I mention that this troper's recent bout of nightmares have been going on for [[spoiler:[[ParanoiaFuel THIRTY DAYS STRAIGHT]], with more than one occurring per night]]? I feel awesome right now. * This troper is a magnet for Nightmare Dreams. The most frequently recurring ones involve an evil train trying to kill everyone, which were [[NightmareFetishist so darn awesome]] she's actually planning to film a horror movie about it with some friends. And then there was the dream that involved playing a game in a Cathedral that was the very definition of {{Bizarrchitecture}}, which was basically Manhunt... in the dark... with serial killers. And it was strangely fun. * [[Tropers/{{Dallenson}} I]] once had a dream were I was running from someone on foot, turns out it was [[{{MechWarrior}} Brendan Corbett]]. He was suprisingly accurate with {{Guns Akimbo}}. [[{{DownerEnding}} Wound up gunning Me down]] :( * [[JusticeReaper This troper]] once had a nightmare where he had to work his way through a tenement high-rise apartment building (don't remember why) and in one room he came across an entire legion of [[RodentsOfUnusualSize cat-sized rats]]. Considering that in real life I'm scared of rats to the point of physical paralysis, it was outright frightening...and it didn't help that I'd heard of the horror novel ''Graveyard Shift'' and had watched the movie ''Willard'' some time previously... ** Additionally, many years earlier, I had a dream where a rat was eating me. I screamed out to two kids (dressed in American 1930's attire for some reason) to help me, but they just [[KidsAreCruel

pointed and laughed at me]]. Then I cried out to my cat, who was ''right there,'' but he [[CatsAreMean just looked at me and walked off]]. And the rat was [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel continuing to feast away on my immobile body]]... * This troper has many nightmares, and has gotten used to them. There are a few though that are really bad. There was the one where I got murdered by a man in the desert, sacrificing my to his god. The ritual consisted of mutilating his victim. I'll save you the gory details. Then there was the dream where a psycho killer was killing a bunch of people for fun. He started by killing their animals to get the fear in them. Dead goldfish are one thing, but what he did to my dog... I have no idea where that vision came from, I just never want to see that again. * I have had many MANY nightmare, but this is the most recent one I've had so I wrote a short story about it (copy pasta). It IS TroperTales, right? -->I awoke inside a classroom sitting at a plastic coated desk with a feeling of pure silence sitting on the air as it gently floated past the tip of my nose. The door to the far right was open the glass shattered,below it the wood stood cracked and decrepit. Every wall was seemingly tinted a bluish green that nearly gave the room a haunted house feeling. -->By no action of my own I emerged from my seat to peer out of a jutting rugged hole in the back of the classroom wall. Overhead was a black sky with red clouds looming over the horizon in a menacing manner. Without warning a giant explosion zoomed up from the ground with mushroom cloud like spores bouncing off the top and into the surrounding red clouds. -->I slowly watched in horror as the resulting smoke raced like a long beach wave towards the classroom. Once again as if being controlled by somebody else I walked back to my now brown chair which seemed out of place in this odd world my mind had painted for me with only the colors of green,black,red plus every color in a nuclear explosion. -->My unrecognizable teacher seemed awestruck at the sight behind us. When he finally gained the words to speak they were clean and in full flow. "I hope you're not too attached to your life kiddies because you're all about to lose them in a few seconds!" Those words seemed to be all he had to say to the class. -->Reveling in the truth of his words I slouched back into my chair. I seemed to have gained control over my actions once more but was too tired,lazy,fearful,and carefree to bother doing anything else. A shiver ran down my spine as I thought about being simply nothing, this depressing thought process sent extreme pains of fear and excitement to clash around in my brain for the mere 20 seconds left that would seem impossible to get through. -->I watched as my vision slowly turned to a mix of pure black and white with a thin slide of the red clouds seeping through the shroud. -->My sense of reality faded with the white noise of dust echoing through the wind in the background. * This troper has had many nightmares, but the Bladed Man was the worst. The "person", if you could call it that, had blades sticking

out of his flesh all over his arms and chest, oozing blood, simultaneously torturing him and providing him with weapons to go after the dreamer. It had a gleeful grin on its face, and cheerful elevator music played in the background as it twirled its arms. The dream woke the troper up in under a second, and it took a LONG while to get back to sleep. ** If this troper ever writes a book The Bladed Man will be TheDragon * This troper rarely has dreams he can remember after waking... but those few that stick with him are '''weird'''. The most memorable ones tend to start out like everyday life, such that it's not obviously a dream. Then they suddenly become lucid dreams, where I realize that it's a dream and I can do whatever I want, since it's not real. Then things go downhill: such as randomly-colored circus animals appearing in the streets, and a nuke going off, mushroom cloud and all. This may be why this troper's dreams of late rarely stick in his mind: unconscious memory editing. * This troper is a lucid dreamer whose nightmares are sentient. One example: "You're a nasty dream, and I'm not going to put up with you any more. In a moment I am going to force myself awake and this dream will end - and you'll go with it. I'll get up, walk around, do something to distract myself and get you out of my head. Then, when I go back to sleep, I'll dream of something else." My nightmare grins malevolently and assures me that the moment I fall asleep again he will be waiting for me, ready to resume tormenting me. I woke up, stayed awake all night, and the next evening I fell asleep after completely forgetting about him. As promised, he was there, waiting for me. He even asked if I'd enjoyed my day. * Hillary Clinton... acting as a deranged Santa Claus, hauling a black garbage bag filled with maggots...as strange two legged lizard bird things that climb on walls and ceilings rip apart and scavenge dead bodies littering the landscape. ** [[FlatWhat What.]] [[ThisIsSparta The. Flying. Fuck.]] I think you seriously need to cut down on those [[HomestarRunner pudding pops]] before bed. * [[Tropers/{{Mabus}} This troper's]] dreams are so bizarre that he became used to a wide variety of NightmareFuel as a child and is no longer bothered by it (even when it's not FetishFuel). When he ''does'' have actual nightmares they're either terrifying enough for a horror movie (being frozen to a raft floating through an icy hellscape) or of the MindScrew variety (a lucid dream was suddenly interrupted by the appearance of some children who were outside his control--and claimed to be from "outside"). * This troper plays with a lot of ideas for Superhero books he wants to write. Some of the best bad guys come straight from this troper's "nightmares". His most recent find was a cross between Hannibal Lecter and ''TheIncredibleHulk''. ** "You wouldn't like me when I'm hungry."? * After watching Akira, I lived through some horrors in dreams, including having tentacles erupt from my back and then blood bursting from my veins. I then awoke to find my ex in bed next to me...her eyes popped out, and my hands turned to claws ripping through her chest. I woke up again. The next day, I had another nightmare. This time, I was

melting, and everything I touched melted immediately, the eyes rolling on the floor before popping violently. In another dream, my sisters eyes turned to fire and she tried to strangle me. Then things turned REALLY damn weird, and a few of my friends started saying things they had said in dreams of my future. That night, I was "visited" by my dead grandma's intestines, which yelled at me that I had eaten the rest of grandma, and they wanted to rip me open to get the rest out. And then the tentacles ripped out and my mouth was forced open extra wide like a snake's and the tentacles force fed me the walking intestines. The next night was a dream so bad I shudder even now. * This troper has some bloody surreal dreams - but its the most straightforward ones that are the scariest. The best example is of one in which his grandfather visited and brought a large bag (the troper was about 7), and dumped it in the hall. In the middle of the night, the bag ripped open, and a group of pitbull terriers moved from room to room, tearing to shreds his grandfather, sister and parents. He hid under the sheets as he heard them enter his room, and then (very stupidly) pulled down the sheets. He woke up as a pitbull, standing right over him, ''roared and started eating his face''. This troper now has an irrational fear of pitbulls. * This troper remembers a truly terrifying dream, in which he get chased by werewolves. Yes, they are INSANELY faster than he is (he's not the world's fastest runner to begin with), and begin to claw him up. Now this wasn't the horrifying part: When he woke up, there were CLAW MARKS ON HIS STOMACH AS WELL AS HIS BACK!!! Now he could (Kinda) explain the ones on his stomach, but on his back!?!?! To this day, he still can't figure this out. * This troper remembers being six or seven, when her favorite shows were all the Scooby-Doo ones. She had a dream where she was one of Scooby's cousins, and it started out fine and dandy- typical case, Vampire terrorizing a town, already did the split-up-and-get-chased thing, and then it was night. For some reason, she and the gang were in a forest clearing around a campfire, but the ground was all sand. Suddenly, the others started dropping through quicksand-holes. First Freddy, then Velma, Daphne, Scoob, and Shaggy. Finally, when she sank through, it was into a black pit- sort of like a well, if it's deep enough. Then, the Vampire turned out to be real, because it appeared out of nowhere and was about to bite her head OFF- not just nip her neck- when she woke. Put her off watching anything related to ScoobyDoo for a year or so. She partially blames her brother getting her to watch the Hellsing anime just a few weeks before. * [[Tropers/{{Midna}} This troper]]'s earliest remembered nightmare actually has a bit of backstory behind it; he had this WinnieThePooh toy as a child that was one of those ring-stacking things, and, when all of the rings were stacked onto the cone on Pooh's belly, the Pooh theme song would play from some tinny internal speaker. Anyway, this troper dreamed that it was in the middle of the night, and the Pooh toy was sitting on the floor directly in front of me... then it turned its head to look directly at me and gained GlowingEyesOfDoom. This troper then ordered his parents to scatter all the pieces of the toy around the house, for fear that, should nothing be done, the nightmares would resume.

** A similar, but more inexplicable and a lot more hilarious, dream involved a six-foot-tall Spot (the dog from the kids' books and cartoon), also with GlowingEyesOfDoom, entered my room and gave me dagger-stares. Then, if memory serves, he headbutted me in the stomach. Hard. Then the camera then zoomed in on his head as a "heartbeat"-style pattern of notes played, the background turning into an African savanna. The real hilarity kicks in when you know that the first - and only - words out of my mouth in the dream were "Spot! You're real!". ** A more recent example would be the time I saw an animated .GIF file of a [[SuperSmashBros Subspace Emissary]]-type cutscene involving {{Kirby}} and a [[{{Pokemon}} Torchic]] running up to the top of a mountain, where Dyna Blade flew down to attack them. The thing is, I knew that something was up with the dream - and sonofagun, Dyna Blade emitted a noisy train whistle and flew out of the computer monitor. The chair disappeared from beneath me and I fell to the floor in slowmotion whereupon I woke up. ** And ''yet another'' exampla - one dream involved a "link repository" on the internet with various links to different sides. My sister had a friend over, and clicked on one... and were linked to a page with a color-shifting picture of some grotesque image. A few seconds after the picture loaded, this ''hideously loud and souldestroying'' scream loaded as well - think [[{{Kirby}} Marx Soul]], except worse. The sister and friend were, needless to say, [[{{Understatement}} freaked out]]. ** But the [[PrimalFear single worst]] [[TearJerker nightmare I've]] [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel ever had]] was one that took place last night, as of this writing, even despite the fact that it took place in the {{Pokmon}} world (although even Pokmon isn't always sunshine and rainbows...). I was leading this suspicious-looking caped man into a Pokmon League building (presumably the one at the Indigo Plateau), and after we were both inside, I turned to him with a cheery "well, here we are!" He said nothing, but walked out a doorway into a parking lot, seperate from the doors we entered through. I ran after him, but he appeared to have vanished, so I walked to my car and sat around to wait for... something. I don't really remember what. *** Anyway, shortly afterwards, this horrible beeping noise started to blare out of nowhere. Putting two and two together, I figured that the caped dude had planted a bomb somewhere, and that if I didn't get out as fast as I could, well... So I immediately opened the door to my car and started running away from the league building as quickly as possible as the beeping grew louder and more urgent. I had gotten to a safe distance about two seconds before the bomb went off. Which was just enough time to turn around and see ''the entire Indigo League building collapse into a huge crater'', presumably killing everyone inside (many of whom were children, from what I saw). Fortunately, the whole thing shortly after. (Maybe I'm making this seem less horrifying than it really was, but despite the setting, it was incredibly realistic and traumatizing...) * This troper had a weird nightmare in which she stood in front of a mirror, and methodically started to rip her own teeth out in all the bloody glory.

* This troper has plenty of Squicky nightmares. Most of which have transformation scenes in them. One of which was kind of a combined spoof of ''The Exorcist'' and ''Ghostbusters'', in it he recalls being in a movie theatre watching some sort of really bad horror movie just like in ''Mystery Science Theatre 3000'' including sitting right next to Mike and the bots, halfway through the movie he notices that there's a guy that [[NoCelebritiesWereHarmed looks, acts and sounds suspiciously like the late great comedian John Candy]] and has a weird bluey green glow around him- turns out that he IS John Candy- it was him in ghost form, so he goes up to John's ghost and confronts him, but then John's ghost flies around the entire theatre causing mischief and it's up to him, Mike and the bots to stop him. They go ghost hunting, and for a while it turns out okay but then John's ghost possessess him which causes him to slowly change into John Candy himself. Then there's one part at the beginning that has a black symbiote-like blob crawling along the wall. The blob then transforms into a snakemonster and almost tries to eat Crow and Tom Servo. * This troper used to dream about being trapped underwater and not able to come up for air. Horrible, truly horrible. ** This troper had the same dream...but in a giant ball pit! Surprisingly, he never got scared of ball pits. *** Bazinga! * Almost all of [[Tropers/{{Dioschorium}} this troper's]] dreams are NightmareDreams. Highlights include a talking rabbit that sang in an Audrey II-esque voice to its horrified mistress while wearing a Minnie Mouse dress, a much-courted young woman being forced to transform into various monsters (a wolf-person, a GiantSpider, etc.) so that she could devour her suitors and take their money, being chained to a vertical underwater landmass and fainting at the sight of [[NaughtyTentacles tentacles headed her way]], talking to a crowd of space aliens in a virtually empty cinema and then leaving to find herself in rural California, and communicating with a Cthulhu plushie through a dusty old book a la ''Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets''. This last dream also involved a GenderBender and an abandoned castle. * This troper often forgets dreams, but most of the ones he doesn't tend to be unpleasant. In one, he woke up after imagining that he was somehow seeing himself move from outside his body and proceeded to go to his father's room for support, only to find that he was ''dead''. And, ''then'', he woke up. False awakenings are great at making bad dreams worse. * This troper has lucid dreams every now and then. While normally fun, his most recent one involved a gigantic mutated tarantula. Despite the fact that he could control everything else about the dream, the tarantula was acting completely on his own. After unsuccessfully trying to wake up, he found himself running in sheer, absolute terror as the tarantula attempted to devour him. * This troper's dreams AND nightmares constantly elude her in the morning (probably a good thing) but she's been permanently psychologically scarred by one in which she learned Miley Cyrus was to play [[http://goodcomics.comicbookresources.com/wpcontent/uploads/2007/11/wolfsbane.jpg Wolfsbane]] of the X-Men in an

upcoming X-Men movie. Did she mention that Wolfsbane is ''supposed'' to be a red-haired Scottish girl? And that any Disney Channel actor appearing in an X-Men film would cause her to boycott it immediately, no questions asked? ** Well, seeing as Disney has recently bought out Marvel... does this qualify as HilariousInHindsight? * This troper had a dream only last night which started off (as this troper's dreams often do) as a bizarre mishmash of nonsense, culminating with the realization that he could control what happened in the Bugs Bunny cartoon he was watching. After tormenting Bugs for a while (the last thing, also the only thing still lurking in memory, was dropping Bugs off a cliff - and on landing, springing a TazmanianDevil-like beast on him), Bugs finally had enough, and with an enraged, insane expression, rushed up to the screen and started ''pounding on the glass, causing it to crack and splinter.'' The dream ended before Bugs could break through, but this troper woke up and could not return to sleep. (He has a recurring phobia of cartoons that [[BreakingTheFourthWall look directly at the viewer]], and this obviously did not help.) * This troper dreamed she kept exotic insects and other buggy things in glass cases in her room, such as giant cockroaches. A recent acquisition was a three foot long red centipede. She locked its case and went to bed... Then awoke in the dream to find the case empty. She turned around and saw half of the centipede's mangled corpse tangled in the sheets. And let's not forget a dream several years ago, where she discovered that the stepfather and baby stepbrother of an old friend were shot to bits in an airport. And a recent one where she watched an exploitation film of a baby being fattened up and eaten alive, its killer crooning gently to it the entire time. * This troper often has dreams that are just plain bizarre - she gets vaguely disturbed when they aren't - but the few flat out nightmares she can remember involved zombies hidden in trees, a tree made of poisonous gummi lips (this first she susperstitiously blamed on not having her favourite dreamcatcher unpacked on the first night in a new house, and caused her to instantly go and hang it up upon wakening) a hand-held silver-backed mirror that reflected back the title shot from [[TheRing]], and a school full of sand and laughing demons. Yet for some reason, the ones that are even MORE bizarre don't phase her. * This troper had a dream that started out relatively normal... until the part where a toddler was playing with a pull-toy train with a plant that looked suspiciously like a tiny Audrey II in it. I knew there was something ''wrong'' once that part started... Then the plant grew to massive size in seconds and BIT THE KIDS ARM AND HIS MOTHER TRIED TO HELP HIM BUT THE PLANT ''RIPPED OFF HIS ARM OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD!!!!!'' Then I woke up screaming. * This troper is used to have insane dreams but keeps forgetting them. He only remembers the freaky ones that made him wake up and unable to sleep after. Like this one where he was trapped with his family along with various other persons and cartoon caracters in a submarine made of bloody flesh and bones. One of the person present being Moe from [[TheSimpsons The Simpsons]] who was pulling hair from disembodied heads of women, which cause blood to pour out the holes while he was

complaining about not finding a woman for him. The most recent scary one though involved him dreaming he was browsing [[NightmareFuel these pages carelessly]] until he reads something saying "Until you turn back and see the monster." to which he turned in the dream only to see a gigantic monster silouhette behind him, looking menacingly at him. It didn't helped that he was slowly turning in his bed when he was waking up while turning back in his dream. * This troper has long dealt with nightmares. The worst ones are where everything goes wrong and goes out of its way to horrify me. One of the worst being a strange bit where I was looking under a table as a strange man from across me kept dropping things under it. And whenever something dropped, what was last dropped disappeared. Eventually he began to rapidly drop a bucket over and over and over so fast it began blinking like a flipbook animation. Slowly and unevenly a bright white tragedy mask rose from the bucket and rapidly floated towards my face in the way only things of nightmares could float... I grabbed it to throw it away but when I touched it, I was in a room filled with posters of mangled bodies. Then, I looked at the mask to see it had been replaced by the face of one of the corpses. Suddenly, it opened its eyes and screamed at me. I woke up so terrified I literally tore down all the posters in my room and stayed up all night with the lights on... The scary part?... That is far from the worst dream I've had. * This troper has a variety of dreams and nightmares, some of which he remembers and some he doesn't. One recurring nightmare he has is though one where he thinks he has woken up, but cannot move, speak, or do anything at all. It is as if his sensory system are active but all his motor systems have shut off. Occasionally he fears that this is what death is going to feel like. ** Perhaps this troper can shed some light on that - sounds like [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sleep_paralysis Sleep Paralysis]], which, in its simplest terms, is just what you described - the mind is awake, but the body is immobile. (Nasty feeling, isn't it?) * This troper can remember the end of one nightmare he had as a kid. Everything was black, and I felt painful pricks on my face at regular intrevals. I half wake up, and there's three creepy-weird bugs hovering in a triangle in front of my face, taking turns stinging me. being about 4 years old at the time, I promptly ran screaming to my parents. ** This troper here had one similar to that one but with scorpions in it. In it he was in some sort of temple like in the Indiana Jones movies. Just when he was about to pick up the artifact, some demon scorpions began to emerge from the ground and then one of them stung me and turned him to stone. This was followed by being sacrficied to some sort of super power ancient deity. * Unfortunately for [[DarkInsanity13 this troper]], her imagination decides to reak havoc on her at night whenever she sees horror movies and disturbing visuals. The most notable example was, after reading two series about the Hiroshima and Nagasaki bombings (with incredibly disturbing detail), she had a dream she was getting a ride to school when a plane spontanaeously dropped a bomb incredibly close to her (within 200 or so metres in terms of distance, not height). The

disturbing part was when she turned away, she ''could feel the heat on her back'' and hear her mother's screams of agony. Cue flash forward, and everything's gone, burning horribly. Said troper woke up and couldn't get back to sleep for what seemed like hours. She still doesn't quite trust planes flying over head, even after reasoning that they won't drop a nuclear bomb on such a small and unimportant city like hers. ** Also, it took her ''several months'' to completely recover from seeing Gothika. She says it's her friend's fault, as since her friend knew she (troper) didn't like horror movies, she said it would be all right if she (troper) went into another room and did something else. Pride hurt, this troper stuck around for the whole movie, only looking away once. She often had to sleep on the couch and watch TV until dawn before getting over it. * [[Tropers/{{Lale}} This Troper's]] most memorable nightmare is of a man breaking into the house I grew up in while my parents were fighting. I attacked the guy with a frying pan and kept screaming and begging for my parents' help, but they just wouldn't stop fighting. I finally killed the guy by stabbing him in the head with a fork... but my parents just kept fighting. Did I mention it's been over 5 years since my parents lived together (and drove me crazy with their fighting like that)? * This troper remembers a [[DeliberatelyMonochrome black-and-white dream]] where there was this outdoor doggy daycare where a Welsh Corgi was still wearing its leash. It somehow got stuck to something as it ran around and it fell down hanging in the air, kicking until it no longer moved. The "zoomed in" stare at its lifeless face so disturbed this troper she immedietly woke up and couldn't get back to sleep. * This troper will not bother you with her normal, Oh-God-Theres-AMass-Grave-In-The-Garden style nightmares, but the ones where she's seemingly awake... i.e, knows she's in bed, seems to have just woken from sleep... ''because there's a HAND emerging from the pillows beside her'', or a ''thing'' descending from the ceiling, or ''something'' emerging from the wardrobe... It's worse because as she's already kind of awake there's no sense of "waking up", and thus no immediate relief - it's rather a matter of staring crazily at the apparent threat, sloooowly working out that what she thought she saw is very unlikely. * This troper's most disturbing nightmare took place when he was eight. I was playing a game where I was standing in a glass booth in an empty room, and one tiny cat-sized dinosaur after another would walk by me after another, and I would have to say what species it was. The first five went fine...then the sixth was a stegasaur and it flung the spikes from its tail at my booth as it walked out. Then the seventh was the dinosaur from Toy Story, and it stopped halfway through the room and started walking toward me, grinning and beckoning me with its fingers. There was a cat-door in the glass booth and I was getting ready to kick it when it came in, but froze and was unable to move...it was a lot scarier than it sounds. * This troper, thankfully, rarely remembers his dreams. The last nightmare he had was relating to his exam results. In the dream I failed so badly that they invented new letters for my grade, just to

make fun of me. The last traditional nightmare I can remember was something to do with a news report in a pyramid. I was first in the position of the male cameraman and then the, female, reporter. We heard a sound from the darkness the cameraman, being able to see down the hallway, fled leaving the reporter behind, the walls closed in trapping her. She was trapped in the darkness for a while and then crushed to death. Needless to say I didn't get any sleep that night. I had this dream about 10 years ago and still remember it. * This troper has a bad habit of dreaming that he gets in trouble with the school or college he's attending or breaks the law (often to the point of getting in trouble to the police). * Somehow, I have the ability to guide my dreams and make my nightmares a lot more tolerable. Zombie attack? Hey, look, a flamethrower! Jason Voorhees stalking me? Look ma, I can fly! Al Gore wins the popular vote? Thank God for the Electoral College! My worst nightmares, though...I've had five of them in my life, the exact same dream, they're always the same save for the setting, and I remember all five with perfect clarity. The "coffin rock" in the woods behind my house, my bedroom in that same house, the basement of that same house, the in-the-middle-of-being-remodeled guest room of my parents' lake house, and the basement of the house I'm currently renting. It's dark, there's no lights no matter how often I flick the wall switch or turn on the lamp. I'm filled with this feeling of just pure, fast approaching dread. I know it's coming, but I can't do a damn thing about it but stand there and beg loudly for the light to turn on as I try over and over again. Finally, I hear this soft chuckling...and from out of nowhere, this white face just slams into me, this pale, grinning, vampire-like face that bodychecks me up against the wall. And then...he starts tickling me. Fingers pushing into my side and my chest...and this make is worse, because I'm scared beyound description...and HE'S MAKING ME LAUGH IN FRIGHT! When I do eventually wake up, I'm yelling so loud, I can "hear" my real self yelling in my dream 5-10 seconds before I fully wake. The first four times, my parents ran into the bedroom because they heard me screaming from their room on the other side of the house, and it took them five minutes to calm me down. The fifth time, my housemate took his SCA broadsword and came charging upstairs because he thought someone had broken into the house and was trying to murder me. * I have had a fair few dreams that started with me being able to control what happens since i know it's a dream only for it to stop working and being unable to wake myself up, and in my dream i'm in a situation where i could get killed. I am usually trying to atleast activate time freeze (think Hiro Nakamura) which if it works doesn't freeze everyone. I prefer the other times when it's all good, if you know what i mean, with lucid dreaming * This troper has a warning to all: If you ever encounter a switch or button labelled "Gravity Reverse" in your dreamscape, leave it alone. This troper found that out the hard way after pulled into the blue void of dreamscape sky, trying and failing to get a handhold on the walls of the building said switch was mounted on. * [[Tropers/{{Demetrios}} This troper]] had two very terrifying nightmares once. And these are them:

# In this one, there was a rocky outcropping on a beach, hit by the waves. Standing on the edge of it was somebody that looked suspiciously like the Cowardly Lion; as if ''TheWonderfulWizardOfOz'' wasn't creepy enough already, eh? Anyway, he was shouting something that was incomprehensible. As soon as he finished what he was saying, the scene was suddenly replaced with a horrifying [[DeliberatelyMonochrome black-and-white image]] saying another incomprehensible speech, and no thanks to its deep demonic voice, it was practically a BrownNote. To this day I still have no idea what this dream means or represents, and even if I did know, I don't think I'd ''want'' to know. # This here second one actually made it into a story series I'm working on, but it was nevertheless horrifying. It's the year 4400 A.D., and the Earth is being invaded by all sorts of {{Eldritch Abomination}}s. My friends and I gain some (''very'') hard-won victories over them. After a few such triumphs, we celebrate, confident that we'd win the day and save the Earth. [[NotSoFastBucko But then]], their leader, who may or may not have been [[UltimateEvil Azathoth]] (who, as you all know, is worse than {{Satan}}), appeared above the Earth and gave a nihilistic speech to all its inhabitants. And that part was creepy all by itself; unlike other villain speeches, there were no {{Evil Laugh}}s or [[TemptingFate fate-tempting]] arrogant proclamations - this guy was all business. I could remember each and everyone on the Earth was terrified by this speech. At the end of it, the villain unleashed an ultra-powerful attack on the Earth that ''wiped out a large number of the races living on it''. For example, the human population [[DepopulationBomb fell from a proud 23 billion]] ''to a measly 75 million''. I could see some people running around in a mad panic, as if trying to outrun the wave of destruction...but to no avail. I also remember slowly regaining consciousness, and finding myself buried under a pile of torn masonry. I could hear my friends voices looking for me, and then pushing the rubble off of me. All I remember after that was getting back up...and seeing the destruction that lay before me. The dream still haunts me no matter how many times I tell it. ** Sounds more like Nyarlatothep than Azatoth (the latter being a formless personification of pure chaos, while the former is prone to giving nihilistic speeches and killing people for the hell of it). Nevertheless, this troper wishes he had dreams like that! *** True, but if ''{{Warhammer 40000}}'' has taught us anything, if chaos is involved, then it's bad news. And now that I think about it, that might just make the dream creepier; despite all those Eldritch Abominations running about, there was no Inquisition or GreyKnights to deal with it. To be fair, though, it was mostly because that dream took place 35,600 years beforehand. ** [[Tropers/{{Crion87}} This troper]] remembers a vaguely similar dream where it is the modern day, right down to these weird [[{{Demonic Invaders}} orange-skinned amphibious creatures]] and a huge [[{{Ultimate Evil}} tentacled eye-thing in the sky]] calling itself [[{{NamesToRunAwayFromReallyFast}} Karuthos]]. In the end, Karuthos is defeated by a {{Crystal Dragon Jesus}} character [[{{WhatDoYouMeanItWasntMadeOnDrugs}}wearing a scientist's labcoat

riding a horse]]. [[{{}} This is an actual dream this troper had!!!]] * I just had to say it, didn't I, mentioning ''40K'', because recently I had a nightmare about that, too. >< Here's what happened. I dreamt that some of my friends and I were getting in the car for a boys' night out, and while we were driving, I looked out the window, and I saw something that I could have sworn was a Tyranid - a Carnifex, I think it was. I heard it roar terrifyingly, but fortunately, I woke up before anything worse happened. ** Recently, [[Tropers/{{Crion87}} this troper]] had a nightmare about the Necrons taking over. Scary while I was sleeping. When I woke up, I thought: [[{{CrowningMomentOfAwesome}} coolest nightmare ever.]] * This troper has many dreams about being trapped underwater and drowning. She always wakes up right as she runs out of air. * I had one dream where I was chased down, as if in a slasher movie, and pecked to death by chickens. Shortly thereafter, I got chicken pox. I Wish I Were Making This Up. * This troper had a dream once where he was killed by a jar of peanut butter, and another in which his favorite stuffed dog had become a giant, seemingly sapient, ballon animal that desired to take over the world through a mind control circus. This troper was 4 or 5 at the time and had the peanut butter dream several times before getting over it. * [[ManCalledTrue This troper]] doesn't usually dream, but one incident comes to mind. He was napping on the couch, then got up to get ready for a wedding... Then woke up on the couch, got up and headed to the bathroom... Then woke up on the couch and began to panic... It was like the Eternal Waking from ''TheSandman''. Thankfully, the next wakeup was for real. ** [[MindScrew Are you sure?]] * This troper has had a few dreams that freaked her out so much she spent half an hour calming herself down before she could even dare to open her bedroom door. The worst ones involved strangers attacking her in her own house. As in, crazed ax-wielding style strangers. * Sounds like mine. One recurring nightmare is scary precisely because it seems so plausible...and because I don't realize that I'm dreaming: I'll be walking around my house, usually saying goodnight to everyone. In any case, everyone is accounted for and I know where they are. In the hallway, I turn towards my room, only to see a shadowy figure move from one room to the other...when I ''know'' none of my family are on that end of the house. Cue startled wake-up. Jeez, I'm a little freaked out just typing it. * [[Tropers/{{Atagamay}} This troper]] isn't bothered by typical nightmares. It's the DreamApocalypse scenarios that I have to watch out for. Nothing like watching a reality and the people in it -some of whom you have befriended- warp and fall apart, with nothing you could do to stop it, even if you did try literally everything that was supposed to work. And it's not like I'll go out with them, because, not being part of their world, I'm not subject to whatever happens to it. * [[Tropers/LWGadra This troper]] often has a recurring dream where his {{Superpowered Evil Side}} physically forces itself out of his chest (the wound immediately heals), stabs the troper in the neck with

a butterfly knife, and then proceeds to go on a killing spree, hacking people (some friends, mostly strangers) into bits and pieces in record time. * This troper suffers from horrific nightmares that leave him trying his best to stay awake as long as possible. This has been going on for a long time, and has produced a whole slew of terrifying nightmares. In one, I was having sex with a purple-skinned woman with dreadlocks. I looked away from her face for a moment, then looked back - and when I did, her face was one huge mouth lined with serrated teeth, and her hair had gone all Medusa on me, with evil snake-things that had been dread-locks. Her snakes bit into the flesh of my face and head, and drew me in towards her mouth, at which point she basically ripped my face off and ate it. Another was that I was working on an assembly line, using a meat cleaver to hack parts from corpses being brought through the room I was in. They were impaled on meat hooks that hung from a chain and they moved through on that. The corpses were all young boys, naked and with their eyes and genitals removed already when they came through. Some of the corpses were rotted, and full of worms, others were mostly intact. I had to butcher each of them like a hog would be butchered in the slaughterhouse, and then I had to take the parts - I work in the medical field so have something of an understanding of internal organs - to appropriate shutes where I threw them in. All the while, blood and other fluids were falling heavily onto the floor, as well as bits of rotted flesh, so that it was terribly slippery. Which was made worse by the fact that the floor was a gratting over a bottomless pit, and that there were holes in that grating and I had the sense that there would be a good chance of my falling into one of those holes. That one was a re-occurign nightmare. Then there was another one, where I wake up surrounded by female vampires and they attack me, and I kill them all so that they're laying strewn about on my bed. The last one... well, I shoot her in the head and kill her, and in the process blow my own genitals off. Yup, they're disturbing nightmares. Oh, and then I've got a repeating nightmare where I'm wrestling/fighting with a huge guy whose much stronger than me, and its hopelessly one-sided against me. Which is something that scares me a hell of a lot, and has ever since I was nearly raped in seventh grade. ** Wow, that's more than the daily recommended allotment of Freudian imagery. * This troper has dreams which haunt him since he was still prepubescent. It often involved him perpetrating a {{Squick}}tastic {{Gorn}}fest whose details are comparable to some of the smut from SoBadItsHorribleFanfics. The people being raped, tortured or eaten by UncannyValley-ed clone of this troper were often his family and close friends and he would wake up when an eyeless specter of his brother broke open a door from nowhere. The details were fuzzy when they first started out, but they became clearer as this troper grew older and started understanding the contents of the dream and he is not sure if he has gone mad and needs psychiatric help. * This tropers nightmares seem to mostly consist of her having evil moments out of homicidal rage. Such as stabbing her father to death after a long argument with a scapel, blood guts and all in glorious

technicolour. Needless to say she was completely traumatised and cried for hours out of shock when she woke up. Unfortunately they seem to be occuring much more frequently lately, which may say something about her subconscious. * Subverted in a dream I had in which there was a room with diffrent colored circles that brought you to dreams, but they could be nightmares. The first dream I went to was a nightmare with a doll like thing trying to kill people with a knife, but the doll was quickly killed with evreyone else alive. * This troper, except in extremely rare cases, can never remember his dreams, but always knows when he's had a nightmare, as he feels a paralyzing terror when he wakes up. Given this, this troper has developed an intense fear of ''being afraid'', and refuses to watch most horror movies, or even things that may in reality be only mildly scary, for fear that they make him feel fear (is this confusing you yet?). On a related note, this troper has also developed a hair trigger survival response, for this same reason. He recently visited Universal Studios in San Diego, and (stupidly) went through the haunted house attraction, which is full of costumed actors as well as scary displays. This troper became so freaked out that he ''attacked'' on of the actors who tried to scare him, and had to be led out by security. ** This troper had a nightmare last night about being stuck on the Universal Studios Tour ride, specifically the part with the spinning tunnel. * [[Tropers/{{Skazka}} Good to see I'm not the only one.]] Most of these are recurring, and the more disturbing ones are recently so.The one where I kept being attacked by a dog while I was dressed as Solid Snake. The one where [[{{Gendercide}} all the women on earth had been killed]] and only I survived, and had to be party to the (frankly quite nasty) scientific male pregnancy process with my fellow soldiers, because I was too afraid of what would happen if I was known to be biologically female. The nine-inch needle stabbing into my liver. The one where I was trapped in a rickety 1920's-style elevator with one of the Nazis from the first IndianaJones movie, which later crashed (the elevator, not the Nazi) and sent me falling down a hill and running face-first into decaying, juicy corpses. The one where I'm in a falling elevator and I die to save one of my fellow riders, only to find out that they were immortal anyway. The time where my sister goes insane and murders both my parents, then stabs me in the neck on the right side while reciting a nonsensical nursery tune, one I can remember to this day that has no basis in any real life rhyme... with a knife that we actually have, down to the broken tip and the serrated edge. She doesn't slit my throat, she STABS through it. And the dream where I'm lying in bed, and I know something terrible is coming, and all I can do is scream and scream and scream, but no noise comes out-until I wake up and realise that I've been screaming like I was being murdered for the last ten minutes in real life. And the dream where I murder one of my classmates with no feeling whatsoever... that one's recurring, and it's probably the worst. I go about very carefully, and quite emotionlessly, trapping him in an olympic-sized school pool and leaving him in the water to drown, but I simply walk away and leave

him there, locking all the doors and shutting off all the lights, and I can still hear him kicking his legs and trying to keep up... ** The {{gendercide}} nightmare is especially chilling now that I remember it in fuller detail. (Had it again. Isn't that just life?) The thing is, in the dream I don't believe the character I started out as was even female-- simply terrified that they were going to get raped in the absence of women, gender aside, from people who had once been perfectly amicable-- and as the story developed past that point, it turned into something like a fusion of ''[[TwentyEightDaysLater 28 Days Later]]'' and ''The Screwfly Solution''. I had been in the military, and along with the destruction of all my records, practically everyone else in the area had died by way of zombie or apocalypse or something-- I'd been picked up by the group of a few other military survivors, and they apparently hadn't noticed that yes, I was biologically female. And I could either volunteer to ''carry'' a biologically engineered child, or to father one-- the first of which would have been painless, but would have revealed my gender, which would have been very, very bad. The second option sounded really good, if not for the giant needle being slammed into my liver without anaesthetic or anything. (And in retrospect, I realise... yeah, FreudWasRight.) * This Troper had many nightmares, but this one takes the cake for its (in lack of a better word) special effects. It started out as a classic school dream - test I didn't study for, then a huge tidal wave covered everything and people were holding on to trees as buildings were ripped from the ground. Okay. Not too scary. Cue next scene, apparently several days later. My (I give up) family and me were in jail, when these horrid things that look like tiny {{EldritchAbomination}}s walked near us, prompting me to cover my younger brothers' eyes. Apparently, the water turned most people [[NightmareFuel inside out]], and the virus was spreading, so the only way to prevent infection was to be locked up. From them. Scarier. Meanwhile, my father was trying to convince the authorities that the virus wasn't that much of a problem (As it only turned you ugly, but left your personality intact. Doesn't sound that good now that I think about it...), and that they should concentrate on defeating the Undead hordes that started appearing after the flood. Cassandra syndrome kicks in, and everyone writes him off as a lunatic. Approximately [[{{Irony}} 10 seconds later]] zombies broke in, ''biting my head off'' and taking my brother. We went after them (apparently, I could survive decapitation, but I didn't have any RequiredSecondaryPowers or HealingFactor so this was a serious AndIMustScream moment for me.), going into a NoOSHACompliance warehouse-factory thing, where they were celebrating Christmas(?) and singing carols. We tried to avoid them, but they didn't pay any attention to us, save for the two things dressed in jester costumes singing and smiling ''as their skin was falling off'', slowly rotting. We got to the head Zombie, who was holding the remains of my head and demanded to see my brother. After a few words, he simply said to my father "Look at your arm". Where once nice, normal skin stood, were now gray, rotting remains of skin and muscle, with some bone showing. And it was spreading. Dad started screaming, and I woke up, holding my head (it's still there). Worst.

Nightmare. EVER. * This troper is hemophobic, meaning that he faints if he hears/sees/thinks too much about blood, organs, surgery, etc. In April of 2008 I dreamed that I was donating blood and passed out from my hemophobia, but while I was passed out, the Red Cross people continued to drain me of blood. I could see it happening, watching myself get paler and paler as my essence poured out of me through a tube. This was enough to make me feel ill all day, as it was stuck in my mind and I couldn't stop thinking about it. Later in the day, at school there was a mandatory informational assembly about the upcoming blood drive. * This troper's earliest memory is of a nightmare involving a 30-foottall Grimace (yes, the big purple thing from the old [=McDonald's=] commercials) hiding behind a spruce tree by my house, waiting for me to come home. HE WAS LOOKING RIGHT AT ME. ** The [=McDonalds=] characters gave me countless childhood nightmares as well. * I had to go do some detective work at a haunted house with a sidekick. We were in one room, when the sidekick disappeared; the wall was a window with curtains, and undefined shapes were banging up against it. Then the room I was in somehow turned into the garage, with one wall missing as it was leading directly out to the pavement. I knew I was in trouble so I tried to call for someone to come pick me up. Then a van appeared from around the corner and drove in and I was hoping it was the person I had called, but then the van ended up between me and the wall, and it was a skeleton in the driver's seat. It didn't do anything, but I realized that vans were going to keep coming and superimpose on top of it, one with the muscles, one with the guts...and once everything up to the flesh had been superimposed, it would come to life and kill me. So I decided to run out of there as fast as I could, but I could hear it running right behind me, and I got through the gate just before it closed, and then there was a fork in the road and I accidentally went in the direction that led to a dark forest...when I woke up. By far my worst dream ever. * After seeing the play ''Woman In Black'', a seriously scary play involving a ghost at this old house that takes the lives of loved ones, I had nightmares for weeks about her popping up, the final dream turned the tables as I appreantly prepared myself with a massive gatling gun filled with holy water bullets...she hasn't returned since. ** Screw Natascha. I want ''that'' for a [[TeamFortress2 Heavy unlock]]. * I've had some quite Squicky nightmares, most of which are set in the setting of my own neighbourhood (usually at my old house or school) and involve a shadow-like shapeshifting monster. One particular nightmare was influenced by Disneyland's haunted mansion ride and was kind of like both the ride and the movie. Then there's the frequent ones I have where the shapeshifting beast appears in the form of a shadowy flying cow and tries to get me to come to the place where it lives which is a dark dimension with a city in it. The worst part being that I am [[AndIMustScream completely unable to speak]] or do anything about it, and if I refuse to do it...the creature punishes me by making me undergo a [[TransformationTrauma horrible

transformation]] into something I'd really hate to be turned into like a cow, tree, a bird of some kind, or a demon dog thing on some occasions. In some other ones various creepy crawlies like spiders, scorpions and mosquitos are featured- usually they start off as relatively small numbers but then more and more of them appear- one most recent one featured the Human Botfly as the Special Guest bug. There's quite a few ones where i'm in a pet store or aquarium that has all sorts of fish in it and I freak out whenever I get to a certain part of the store or aquarium that one being a room which suprisingly had a tank with pirahnas in it (which is kind of ironic since in real life Piranhas are illegal to buy as pets) and the piranhas leap out of the water sometimes and try to eat several of my friends, on occasion in these ones i've been bitten by one and had the misfortune of changing ''into'' one. In most of the pet shop or zoo related ones is usually a case of Attack Of The 50ft Whatever where one of the animals is mutated into a giant creature and rampages through the city ala King Kong. In most of my school related ones, the teacher (or sometimes the school principal) usually comes across as quite nice and calm but goes all Large Marge when they're mad or upset- and when they're in this state they look like the crazy DemonHead vampric version of Amanda Bearse in ''Fright Night''. My most memorable ones being the ones where i'm in my old bedroom and the shadow-like shapeshifting beast uses his shadow powers to turn the room into a dark Tim Burton-esque nightmare room, I get out of bed, go up to the door- turn the nob, open the door and run like heck out of the room and into my parent's room. * Like at least two other tropers, I've dreamed of being underwater and unable to get to the surface, but oddly those aren't nightmares I always struggle and swim as fast as I can, and I never reach the surface, but when I'm forced to breathe in, WaterIsAir. My ''nightmares'' - well, one of the first I remember involved Barney the Dinosaur and Friends with axes on their tails, chopping down trees. Another had me being pursued by the Face On The Dime(I have ''no idea'' why that terrified me) and running forever but it was always there, trying to tell my parents but it was never there when they looked. And then there was the multi-chaptered nightmare with the megalomaniacal Paul Bunyan giant robot... * This troper's nightmares are lucid. It basically comes down to, "The giant decaying baby head has killer roaches now? Hey, NPC who bears an uncanny resemblance to my brother, take this flamethrower and guard the right hall while I dream up a nuke. Oh, and let me dream up a few dozen copies of you for an advance guard..." ** If I could dream like that I wouldn't bother to play videogames. * This troper's dreams aren't so much scary as bizarre. Whether it's skeletal monsters formed from swamp water battling {{Final Fantasy}}type heroes, the adventures of a group of young people bonded to special spirits that they can [[TransformationSequence transform into]] attending a {{Harry Potter}}-like school where they learn how to use their abilities, or an army of goblins battling a heroic knight with a [[SailorMoon Sailor Venus]] lookalike as his love interest, this troper very rarely, if ever, appears in his own dreams, more often being an invisible observer of events and things that defy any

sort of Freudian or Jungian dream analysis. ** I dunno, those dreams sound like they could make for some good stories. * Quite possibly the most in-depth dream I ever had was one of these. I was trapped in a Bizarrchitecture hotel with a bunch of other friendly people. Which would be nice, except that there was this young girl who had these bizarre pupils and lines down her face, and she somehow had this plan to change the world. She could teleport everywhere, sing from a gaping mouth on the back of her head to summon animated characters to kill people in droves(The effect was not unlike Who Framed Roger Rabbit, only more lethal and surreal), and, worst of all, was psychic. This doesn't sound bad, except that ''she knew this was all a dream and was using her powers to ALTER YOUR BRAIN to rewrite the dream reality''. This included replacing your family with a large hairy man, causing the scenery to suddenly shift in unexpected, frequently lethal ways, summoning giant jellyfish, and generally fucking you over at every turn. The only way to stop it was to focus your mental capabilities on the fact that you knew it wasn't real, and even then sometimes it didn't work. And she took special interest in screwing me over, popping up to taunt and threaten me everywhere. ''Lovely''. * This troper had a recurring dream as a child. To make sure you properly understand the dream, she'll have to tell you these things first. Just next to the door to her room was a mirror, and you passed it when you walked out from her room. Okay, here comes the horrid dream. She was going to get a glass of water or something after going to bed, and finds that the reflection in the mirror is someone else. It is a girl who looks like herself, but something is terribly wrong with her. And then, this mirror-girl switches places with her, thusly leaving the real girl inside the mirror. Since the mirror-girl looks so much like the real one, she claims to be the real girl and proceeds to destroy everything the real girl loved (no, really. Causing her friends to hate her, breaking her stuff, being awful in school to lower her grades...) and all the girl trapped in the mirror could do was watch. Then, the mirror-girl switched back and left the real girl with all the blame. ** Sounds like a good idea for a story. * This troper usually can't remember his dreams, and had rarely, if ever, really terrifying ones. But this one recently was too much: It started with an adult man anally raping a baby(!!!), and got worse... the baby turned into something monster-like, but still definitely recognizable as a human... I could see every rib, it was splattered with blood, had blood around its eyes... it's enough. I definitely don't watch baby porn, I'm appalled at the very thought of it and of everyone who isn't... I need some therapy, ASAP. And if there's someone responsible for this... * Just the other week this troper had a dream where he was being pursued by an evil invisible bunny rabbit in a giant library. I couldn't see or hear it; I just ''knew'' it was chasing me with intent to kill. I even built a barricade out of bookshelves, but it didn't hold against it. * This troper had a dream where a baby had grabbed onto his arm. Said

baby was evil and eating his life force. This troper crushed the baby's skull into a bloody mess but the baby didn't die... * This troper has had several dreams ranging from scary to plain weird. One of them was that his entire family was going to be executed, then there was a fever induced one where "the jews" were taking over Runescape and while he was logging on to help fight them he was sucked into Runescape world, another one was an incredibly weird transformers/Dune/Shrek/Zoo Tycoon/Pokemon/Jurassic Park cross over thing. But the absolute worst one was where I was at a water park and went into one of those tunnel slides, after going down it for a while I asked someone else on the slide when it stopped, but when the person turned to look at he their face was a half decayed skull like thing, then they told me that the slide didn't end, it went on for ever and ever and the people on it didn't die, they just decomposed until one of the park employees came to eat them. There was also a pretty bad reoccurring one where I watched myself being eaten be a crocodile. * This troper recalls a childhood nightmare that he actually tried to act on upon waking up. After being unsettled by a horror film before going to sleep, the nightmare involved watching a female ghost slip into the house by phasing through the back door. After this troper woke up, he proceeded to leave his room, grab a cleaver from the kitchen, and wake up his mom in her bedroom while flashing the knife in his hand, telling her, "I'm going to kill her (that ghost)." You can imagine [[ThatCameOutWrong how very wrong this all looked]] in the middle of the night. That dream was never had again. * The worst nightmare this troper had was that he had transformed into a werewolf-like monster and raped a woman. The worst part was that, though he'd never even ''think'' about doing such a thing, in the dream he enjoyed it. It deeply disturbed this troper for a long time. * This troper remembers walking through a hospital morgue and turns around to watch the corpses claw their way out. It was made more surreal due to the fact there was no sound and he could see where they were beating and clawing to get out and HE COULD NOT HEAR THEM!! And that's before they started writhing and convulsing and silently screaming as they mutate into a form that could best be described as Lovecroftian. * [[Tropers/{{MinusZero}} This Troper]] had a nightmare that happens about once every 2 years. I am playing tennis with my alarm clock with [[{{Mario}} Birdo]] when I smash it into [[AmbiguousGender it/him/her]]. Then a seven year old dressed in a white and red striped polo shirt with no pupils comes out of my closet. I have trouble breathing and wake up. Sometimes in my bed, sometimes standing with my hands around my neck in front of the closet. * {{Hazuki}} has far fewer nightmares now, thank goodness, but she was practically sleep-phobic as a child and young teenager because of them. The least frightening, and the ones that still occur today, are of the "fall below the surface of water, can't get back up, wake up as you drown" variety. More frightening ones include: ** Being forced to can/jar these things that looked like foul okra pods but would hatch into giant white grubs if I didn't, in an apocalyptic world, the entire area around me burnt and smoking with a

blood-red sky. ** An intensely disturbing one where I had to eat my mother's flesh for some reason, and felt as if I had murdered her myself. ** One where my teddy bear, an ancient stuffed animal I got at 5 months and who is still with me today, became a levitating fiend with evil, glowing red eyes and a mouthful of sharp teeth. ** Watching my friends jump into a pit of acid, one by one, because "the sacrifice must be made." It dissolved them instantly, at least... ** Several where the entire world just goes * wrong,* something like the corruption caused by older game cheat devices that screw the palette and tile type attributes. Things like solid things not being solid, temperatures being wrong, sound not working right, people being horribly distorted and sometimes turning into monsters, and worse. ** Many others which I mercifully cannot remember, but remember waking up screaming and traumatized from. * [[Tropers/{{JET73L}} This troper]] has a history of occasional, severe nightmares, but three stand out amongst the rest: a series of nightmares that took place in a red-sky dimension and ended almost invariably being killed by the sniffer dogs from Silent Hill 4 (started before even Silent Hill 2 was released, possibly even SH1) and most recently, since something started killing them and spitting their corpses on power lines and wire fences, a heart attack after coming within "kill range" of the unseen BigBad; one event in a series of mostly non-nightmares in which a group of Naruto-style anime ChildSoldiers (including himself) were to note what was odd about taxidermied, diorama'd cows... with what appeared to be opaque red jam down their fronts... and pointy teeth... and ''breathing'' (surprisingly, did not end in death); and a recurring nightmare from his younger days where he would rule the world, before a camel turned into the rat king from the Nutcracker (complete with tin soldier uniform) and stabbed him through the heart (pain, then death the instant the heart first tasted steel). Plus all the psychological torture nightmares when I've known a dream character for [[FakeMemories years]] and realize they're gone forever once I wake up. * This troper has a recurring nightmare in which she commits a horrific murder using a heavy table lamp. A clairvoyant once told her that if she sees a lamp like this in real life, she must destroy it or get rid of it because it will bring bad luck. * My nightmares are... Horrible. HORRIBLE. Here's some examples: ** My earliest nightmare: Being chased by an enormous, red and black striped snake with...a furry face...chasing me around my home town before wrapping its tail around me, dangaling me off cliff and laughing maniclly as I scream. ** After watching that episode of Doctor Who; where the people have gasmasks growing out of their faces: Being told by my then 6 year old brother (who, for God knows what reason, was in a tuxedo and had two identical pretty 6 year old blond girls hanging off either arm) that he was infected, then ''patted me on the arm'', meaning I got infected and then, as I run, collapsing and realising that the mask growing out of my face as I try to get my parents, because I KNOW they can cure me, and my last thought being 'Hey, Sam (my brother) got infected

before me and hasn't changes! NOT FAIR!' Unsuprisngly, this led to my ridiculous fear of gasmasks, though oddly I still love snakes. ** One of my WORST nightmares: Getting trapped in a mirror and watching all my friends and family desperatly searching for me and, unable to find me, give up and start leading their lives. What's awful is that that they were ''happier'' WITHOUT me. I then turn around to find the mirror version of me, wearing my clothes, with my hairstyle, face etc, only with huge acid green snake like eyes, who tells me that I'm trapped in the mirror ''forever'' and I will never get out, only she's going to take my place, unless I refuse to look into her eyes. I realise that I have been looking into her eyes the whole time so I'm going to stay here... and then mirror me EATS ME. I am, and always have been, shit scared of mirrors. ** My WORST dream: Getting to become a vampire and travel with Mr. Crepsley and Darren, and Mr. Crepsley falling in love with me (which I long to happen) only to discover Darren now hates me, because HE wants all of Mr. Crepsley's attention, so he chases me around with a stake, trying to kill me. Then I 'wake up', run to where Mr. Crepsley's sleeping, only to discover Darren's ''killed him'' and has now tied me into his coffin and is going to ''bury me alive''. ** But I have nice dreams too, my best being where I join Darren and Mr. Crepsley, Mr. Crepsley falling for me (but Darren not minding), and I eventually become the BEST vampire's assitant of ALL TIME, so good alot of other vampires tried to kidnap me and make me their assistants, (including Gavner, Seba, Vancha and even ''Kurda'' who I despise) only to have Mr. Crepsley rescue me every time... ah, bliss. * Want to know the reason that ThisTroper has long hair? It's because the last time he decided to have it cut the next day, he dreamed about a barbershop, at the top of a Main/EvilTowerOfOminousness. Which could only be approached through a Main/SinisterSubway. And the barber? [[StarWars Darth Vader]]. ** PFFFF I'm trying to sympathize, but the idea of Darth Vader as a barber is ''awesome''. And hilarious. * This troper doesn't often have nightmares and when she does they're usually only scary at the time and I laugh about them later. I've only ever had one dream where it actually sent me crying to my parent's room and it went thus: I was in some kind of Harry Potter-esque world, complete with Voldemort asleep/dead on an elaborate bed thing, and some woman. The woman was telling me how he slept until something happened, and that she loved him or something (This was a long time ago I can't remember it perfectly). It was a little creepy, but only got REALLY scary when he woke up. I ended up getting chased through the dungeon (which resembled something from a video game) until I got trapped in a dead end. He was just slowly walking towards me, down the corridor, and the worst part was it was somehow set out like the PC version of the game, so I could pause it and reach a menu screen, but there was no 'Exit Game' button and I could not wake up. I've had that dream twice, but not for a long time. * [[Tropers/{{Zemyla}} This Troper]] had an exceedingly frightening dream. I went to bed with a blanket over my head because it was cold. Then I had a dream where I was working with a toxic orange powder, and [[TooDumbToLive I didn't have any safety gear on]], and so when a

draft blew some in my face, I inhaled it and died. And when I woke up, I had the blanket over my head, so it was completely dark and silent, and I thought [[OrWasItADream I had died for real]]. I eventually flailed around enough that I pulled the blanket off. * This troper recently had a nightmare in which a terrorist organization took over the world and declared war on it, and found his home and surroundings becoming extremely dangerous territory. At one point, he said good night to his mom as she went off to bed, shaken by the fact that it might be the last time she ever went to bed. And then he woke up. His pseudo-nightmares about waking up late when he had important matters to take care of in the morning hold no candle to that. * This troper does not find ''SilentHill'' scary in the slightest. This troper does not find Pyramid Head scary in the slightest, either. Those recurring dreams where I am dressed in a nun's habit, strung up and unable to move or open my mouth, and being repeatedly raped by Pyramid Head while a white-clad [[SerialExperimentsLain Lain]] watches, however? Those are ''terrifying''. * This troper, back when he was a wee lad, once had a [[DreamWithinADream DreamWithinADream]] with no less than 17 layers. --> It started off with me lying in bed, trying to get to sleep, then some horrific long-haired white-robed ghostly lady pops out from under the bed and diving for my face. Note that when this nightmare occurred the trend of that type of ghostly characters hadn't been set yet. --> At this point, I wake up, breathe a sigh of relief, then check under my bed just to set myself at ease, breathing another sigh of relief, only to have the same lady fly in through the window, and me waking up again... --> Rinse and repeat with different ways for the ghost to enter, including, but not limited to, coming outta my belly, coming outta my '''face''' and turning around to stare at me, and coming out from the wall directly behind me and '''settling her fingers on my face one by one'''. At repetition number ''something'', I manage to banish her with an amulet I hang near my bed; the amulet features a number of Buddist gods and goddesses, actually does hang in that spot in my real life room. --> I finally get to wake up. At this point in time I was already feeling really haggard due to all these terrifying nightmares, and was so very ready to get some peaceful sleep, but apparently the danged nightmare wasn't over yet. --> Yes, I am not shitting you, my sick mind actually managed to sucker '''myself''' into feeling real relief and letting go of all those taut nerves, only to have the ghost come out of the wall AGAIN, and this time with some fleshy brownish monster whose exact looks I cannot remember. --> The rest of my memory is quite sketchy, though I do remember that the amulet was powerless against them after that point. And that I somehow managed to remember to count the number of layers the dream had gone through. The lady ghost keeps bringing in more and more of her friends with each iteration, until I am literally smothered by them, and I just give up and close my eyes and hug my knees. --> And guess what? That iteration was the end of the dream. All their

monstrous noises cut off suddenly, I woke up, cold-sweating like I had never before, and physically and mentally exhausted. --> I fell asleep about 30 seconds later. * This troper has had a few strange dreams, many of which are so surreal in their settings that she'd need to write them all out just to sort them all out for a good analysis. BUT, there was one dream she had that came close to a nightmare. While coming back home from a road trip more or less across country with her family, she had a bizarre dream which took her from someplace in a city to being on a train to being outdoors in this park like area with my father. The sky turned a dark shade of red with long golden lights swirlling around overhead. I was quite sacred of this in my dream, going so far as to cling to my dream-dad. Then the sky breaks apart into dark red petal like things, revealing a blue sky. YES. My nightmare averted itself. And on top of that, a short while later, I was talking with my mother about strange things my brother and I would do in our sleep (including instances of conversations we carried out between us, but that's another story..) and she told me that on the night I had had this nightmare-whichaverted itself, I had reached out for real while still asleep. My mother, waking up in the middle of the night to answer natures call, hugged me. The closet I ever got to a nightmare aside from that was this sepia colored dream set in Victorian England in which this... something was running amuck in the middle of the night and the only things I ever heard in the way of dialogue in that dream was a angry/terrified man chasing that something and screaming "That... THIIIIIIIIIIIING!!" In that very dramatic way people scream things in horror movies. Proper example or no, this is the best I have to offer. * This troper recently had a nightmare where he was riding a short schoolbus through a city near where he lives. I was the only passenger, and there didn't appear to be a driver or anything. So the bus stopped at the local bowling alley, despite their not being one in this particular city. I stood outside and watched the sunset for about a half-hour, then got back on the bus. As soon as I was on the bus, I noticed a ring-tailed lemur in my seat. The bus left, and started speeding down the street at a faster speed than any schoolbus should go. I tried to sit by the lemur, and then it attacked me for no reason. While it might not be particularly scary, it was weird as hell. What's weirder is that I know what the dream represents, down to every little detail. * This Caucasian troper once had a dream where he woke up, went to the bathroom, looked in the mirror, and discovered that he had became black. ** Is this {{Troll}} or just UnfortunateImplications? *** I'd imagine anyone would be disconcerted to find that their skin had changed color overnight. * This troper often has dreams where he has been transported to an alternate universe, but is still in my home town, just an alternate version of it. Because it's ''alternate'', the buildings are replaced by other buildings in similar spots with similar purposes, but because it's not exactly the same he gets hopelessly lost because his house isn't there at all. The dream never ends instantly either, it just fades away as he slips back into full-on unconsciousness. It's pretty

scary when you've been sent away from home so often; this troper has a mental condition that has gotten him in situations where he had to leave home to fix the problems and let his family recover from the stress. * I believe that many of my nightmares occur at the same time, every year. My first of these (I was eight at the time of the nightmare) involved me running away from a wolf's howl, slowly growing closer. Then, I ran into a man who was wearing a trenchcoat. He smiled slightly, and then his face ''split in two''. The top of his head fell off, '''leaving his tongue lashing in the wind'''. Then, he pointed behind me, and when I turned around, there was a ''50 FOOT TALL WOLF STARING AT ME''. It gets worse. When I was 14, I was (and still am) a gigantic H.P. Lovecraft fan. This one scared me a bit more. In the dream, I was reading one of his books, "The Color Out of Space". All of a sudden, a blinding array of colors (specifically, the colors were red, yellow, white and orange). I believe this was meant to stun me so it could ''eat my face''. I resisted, and my face '''exploded'''. I was lying on the ground, face in ''five'' different parts. I got up, stumbled to the door, and opened it. There were EIGHT colors this time and they all charged me at once, my eyes being bombarded with those damn colors. That's when I woke up. I was afraid of touching books for ''weeks''. ** Oh yeah, there was also the time where I imagined that sharks broke out of their tanks and ''jumped out of their cages to eat me whole''. * ThisTroper once had a dream in which he's in a ruined city, feeling extreme heat, and desperately looking for water. He found a small pool of water, which he somehow knew that if drank, it'd kill him faster than the heat did. It's a nuclear apocalypse nightmare. Said Troper is thoroughly unnerved by the horribly realistic dream. * This troper once dreamed of being in the middle of a virus epedemic that rotted out people's eyes. She was hiding with her mother and aunt in the kitchen and while her mother was discussing the symptoms with her aunt she could feel her own eyes going... strange. Out of focus, dull. Terrified she said nothing and hoped it would go away, but it didn't, and the sight in that eye began to slowly black out. She finally asked her mother to take a look and her mother cried out "IT'S ALL DEAD". The troper woke up shaking and was unable to go into the kitchen for the whole day. * [[Tropers/{{Chzo}} This Troper]] has two types of these. On the one hand are the straight up bizzaro crap that constantly scares me awake. On the other hand, sleeping after smoking nearly any amount of marijuana will give me paranoia dreams. On the very slight chance that I start feeling paranoid about anyhing, I will ''alyways'' dream, in detail, an occurrence of encountering whatever it was that made me so paranoid * [[Tropers/{{AnonymousUser}} I]] had a dream about five years ago where I was taking a shower in a silver, aluminum foil-esque room, and my skin started peeling off, revealing white meat with red dots. Voices in the distance were moaning "you're growing up..." and I woke up. * I had a dream a long time ago. I can only remember one specific image, but it has terrified me ever since. I looked out my window to

see some horrible half human THING staring in at me. A ghoul of sorts. This sounds so very non-specific, but it still terrifies me. This dream singlehandedly make me have a minor phobia about windows. * [[SpikyK This troper]] had an interesting one. Taking place in his elementary school, outside of the once-kindergarden room-- it's a big lobby-type room, dimly lit, right near the lunchroom, no apparent purpose. Take the stairs and doors out, put in a balcony, and cue the flooding. Considering the troper's crippling fear of water, this would be bad enough... if it wasn't for the nothing-short-of-fucking-demonic Cat in the Hat that came in halfway through. Oh, he came in normal enough, but he slowly turned into this demonic red-eyed, huge-clawed cat-monster that took up a quarter of the room and that he had to dive into the water and swim around to avoid its claws and attempts to eat the troper whole, video-game-boss style, regularly returning to the surface for air. Of course, the dream ended when the troper's lungs gave out because the Cat in the Hat starting BREATHING FUCKING FIRE every time he came to the surface, and he drowned. People don't believe him when he says he's afraid of the Cat in the Hat. * The worst nightmare this troper ever had was at the age of seven or eight. (This requires the explanation that at that age, I was a darkhaired, pale-skinned girl with a heart-shaped face, and my mom had a clock-radio that, every morning at 7:30, switched on to some country station. I was at least partially awake during this dream, as I remember some tragic country song playing in the background - I think "Concrete Angel". This is important.) I was standing in front of a perfectly vertical sheet of ice. Through the ice I saw a Girl with dark hair, pale skin, and a heart-shaped face. Her eyes were closed. It was definitely the Arctic or Antarctic - I'm not sure which, since there were both polar bears and penguins present, as well as a moose (hey, I was 7). They were all crying, because the Girl was dead, and she was their friend. At this point, there was a riff or something in the song on the radio - at that moment, the Girl's eyes OPENED. I woke up, so scared I couldn't scream, and ran for my mom's room, muttering, "She's dead, and her eyes, and dead eyes and ice and..." My mother (in a surprising moment of lucidity for that hour of the morning) asked "Are you sure she was dead? Maybe she was just sleeping or something." That stumped me - not because I wasn't sure she was dead, but because I wasn't sure how to explain that certainty to my mom. I just knew in that horrible, gut-wrenching sense of nightmares where you know it's true and nothing can change that. The worst part of this is that if I try to explain how horrible, how terrifying it is, noone believes me. (That and a horrible hate for cold - when I go out in the winter I look like Randy from "A Christmas Story" - ON PURPOSE.) * Anyone read that Goosebumps book where the kid's dad turns into a plant monster? Yeah, I had a nightmare after reading that book. It's kind of funny because that's the only time I've ever had a nightmare reading the Goosebumps series. It's not funny because I only woke up after the thing tried to behead me! * This troper still remembers his very first nightmare from when he was a little kid. Everyone he came across would turn into some sort of alligator creature and chase him. This includes anyone he went to for help, such as his own parents.

** This troper is also scared of bees and bee-like insects. Of course he's had at least one dream over the years where giant beehives covered the walls of every room in his house. ** Also, he doesn't have "falling dreams" like everyone else. Instead he has dreams where he slips on ice and wakes up as his ass hits the ground (Maybe it's a Canadian thing). The good thing is that they don't take as long as the falling dreams. ** Oh, God. Reading this page made him think of a dream he had as a kid that wasn't even scary at the time, but actually creeped him out a bit when he just remembered it. Picture this: [[DonkeyKong King K. Rool]] sitting on the grass, singing a very heartfelt love song (that may not even exist) to piano music in the background, while watching the sun set over a lake. Most likely with his voice from the show, which I used to watch as a kid. Someone should start a Weird Dreams page so this troper can move this there. * [[Tropers/{{chitoryu12}} This troper]] got ''Condemned: Criminal Origins'' from Gamefly, and always had a mantra of beating every game he got from Gamefly before sending it back. The last level he played before going to bed was the shopping mall level, complete with the creepy mannequins and enemies that posed as them. One sequence that particularly disturbed this troper was turning around and seeing a mannequin standing stiff behind him, then turning around and seeing more start to appear, and more, and more, until finally you're pushed off the balcony by the faceless, motionless hordes. That night, the troper was afraid to go to sleep after a short dream, which was so short he can barely remember, other than that it mainly involved scare chords coupled with zooming shots of the mannequins, some of them mutilated and hanging from the ceiling and on the walls of alleyways, and all in black and white. Needless to say, when the mannequins reappeared in the sequel, this troper went blazing out of the room. * This clown-fearing troper had the [[SarcasmMode great pleasure]] of dreaming about a crowd of [[MonsterClown Monster Clowns]] chasing her through a dark and twisted maze at night, all of them with a permanent Joker-esque SlasherSmile on their hideous faces, all of them laughing madly, and all of them wielding the most ''nasty'' weapons... The worst part was that the maze kept ''shifting'', all the scenery melted into a garish, surreal, mind-melting mess, and I woke up screaming, terrified that I had gone insane. The worst part was that after I woke up, I could ''still hear them laughing at me''. '''''For a good five to ten minutes'''''. Another dream I had when I was about four involved me, [[Rugrats Tommy, and Chuckie trying to escape an antheaded Angelica]] in a giant house. The end of the dream was always the same: Ant-gelica would unleash a massive swarm of ants on the three of us, and the swarm would devour us alive until we collapsed into a pile of bones. In squishy, traumatic, horrifying detail, complete with screams of agony. Again, I was ''only four years old'' when I first dreamt this... * this troper remembers a dream she had were at the age of 9 she hopped out her bunk bed,grapped her older sister and ripped out a chunk of her neck while her sister cried in pain.What really got this troper wasn't that she killed her sister or the fact that the blood was warm and taste metalic but the fact that when she saw her self in

the mirror she looked like a demon. * This troper's worst dream involves walking down a long, dark corridor only to reach the front gate of her school. There was an ambulance parked there, and a few medics crowded around a body. When I peered closer, the body was ''me''. Suddenly the body's eyes opened and murmured, 'You did this to me...' The poor troper was 10 when she had that dream, and has since been very, very afraid of death. ** Another dream involved dolls, specifically Barbie dolls. She was nine. Ever since her terrible slip-up during a kindergarten stage play, she hated to be stared at. She dreamt about being in a shopping mall, and suddenly she found herself in the Barbie aisle. The lights went out one by one until there was this singular cold light upon her. All the dolls turned their heads and stared at the troper. Even though years have passed since the dream, and she now loves taking center stage, this troper has has a lasting fear of dolls. Once she was shopping with her mum, who runs a kindergarten and was looking to buy a doll for a student's birthday. It was so similar to her dream that this troper opted to go look for her dad in the nice, safe computer store. * ThisTroper (KurtmanJP) had a nightmare when he was young about an ogre crushing Calamity Coyote from TinyToonAdventures to death in a mine (he's my fave character in the show!). Also, another dream revolved around a demon-cat pointing a crossbow at my neck when I was strapped to a chair in a jungle and forcing me to watch EldritchAbomination creatures on an ATM machine. Yet another nightmare was about a mouse that wouldn't stop playing a tuba as well as recurring nightmares about Bees (One of my biggest PrimalFears). * This troper has surreal dreams every night, their was the one where she had school on saturday, her teacher was replaced a mean old lady, and much to the horror she tried to wake up in the dream and she could'nt (but later I did), another nightmare happened when she had the flu and fell a sleep with a high fever, she was cleaning up a dungon like basement, she found her missing Bugs Bunny doll in a GoGurt tube, when she freeded bugs, it was like a wet clay verison and part of its ear fell out, then she went towards this wooden door that was chained up, piles of costume peices layed on the floor, she put some of it on and opened the door and found her self in a alternate demension dance party (kind like the one from The Killers Spaceman Music video, but the dream happended 3 years before it was made), and finally a nightmare involing a freaky red bat monster with an magic 8ball for an eye appearing on her computer screen. * This troper's freakiest dream is a recurring one. Everything will be completely normal - I'll be relaxing in the park, or in class, or something - when suddenly everything just freezes, and starts to melt and drip downwards. First, people melt, starting with their skin, then muscles and organs, until finally the bone itself melts. Paint will melt off of walls, then the ground and walls melt, leaving only blue sky...which of course, melts into the blackness of space. Which then melts into just blank whiteness. The entire time this is going on, this noise that is best described as the [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dLWic_l1kRU THX sound in reverse]] is playing, except dragging on forever. This dream leaves me afraid to

sleep for a few days... * Okay, this isn't actually a nightmare, but it's damn interesting, and I'm putting it here since there's no version here for regular dreams. I dreamt I was playing a sequel to ''{{Yume Nikki}}''. You played as a Swedish boy this time, and there was a butler in the Nexus (which looked different, in some way I can't remember). The butler explained that the boy was a reincarnation of [[spoiler:Madotsuki after she died]], and that he had a "seed of evil" in him that would cause him to become evil unless he conquered it in his dreams. (This seems to have followed the "[[spoiler:Madotsuki is a budding serial killer]]" WMG. The weirdest part is that I was {{Dreaming Of Things Yet To Come}}, since later that day I just happened to stumble upon ''Yume 2ikki'', which, albeit different than my dream went, is still interesting... * I once dreamed I was playing in one of those massive jungle gyms, I went into the center, and this girl was looking at me, smiling. Does'nt seem scary? Her smile was grotesquely streched out of proportion and her teeth were huge and yellow. It does'nt sound scary but I still shiver when I think of her face and that loving smile... * This troper can't remember all of the details (thank goodness), but she had a 'Psycho'-based dream so frighting she had to sleep in her parent's room, and she's almost an adult! (All she remembers is watching somthing very much like it on a stage with more than one victim...) * The most frightening dream this troper has ever had is one that doesn't actually seem scary. To this day she has no idea why it scared her. It happened a couple of years ago, but it was probably the most terrified she had ever felt. The dream had started out differently, and the details are fuzzy, but it ended with this troper in her bed at night, when a man came into the room, moving very slowly towards her bed, calling her "Angelo" and speaking in some unintelligible language. Even though his words were not understood, he seemed to be proclaiming his love for this troper, but there was this frightening sense of something sinister. This troper had a body guard who took the man away before he could reach her, but each night, the man would get past the body guard and come in and do the same thing, moving very slowly and speaking gibberish. Then this troper woke up, and immediately felt a lingering sense of absolute dread. The rest of the night she kept watching her open doorway, expecting the man to come in at any moment. * Partially subverted in that this troper often had nightmares as a child, to the point where I no longer have any emotional response to any of my dreams, good or bad. * [[Tropers/{{Gerusz}} This troper]] simply conquers his "ordinary" nightmares and turns them into action/horror/mistery flicks. Hell, he even ''enjoys'' these nightmares. The other "class" of his nightmares are the "ghost" nightmares in which he dies (thus breaking the "you can't die in your dreams" rule) and turns into a ghost. Sometimes he haunts his friends, and in a dream he watched his funeral and was disappointed with it. However, he has his fair share of DreamApocalypse nightmares: the Big Rip, LHC disaster, nuke in the backyard, etc... have all happened in his dreams.

* [[Tropers/{{JakeWasHere}} This troper]] had an unsettling dream, the details of which grew vague to him after he woke up -- probably because his dreams tend to have all the lucid clarity, and simultaneous ambiguity, of a David Lynch film (things are quite definitely seen to ''happen'', but the context and rationale behind them is never very clear). I remember a TV monitor showing an empty room (in a building, incidentally, that appeared to be based entirely on my memories of what the classroom buildings and lecture halls at my old college looked like); I had to go to that room and turn off the video camera that was recording that image, but when I got there I found another monitor by the camera, showing another image of another room. I was convinced that I had to find all these cameras and turn all of them off, or they were going to let something out and it was going to find me and kill me. What the thing was, where it was, the means by which it could use the cameras to escape -- none of those were clear at the time... but whatever it was, I could feel it watching me. ** Not the only such dream I've had, either. I was sick with a fever once and had an almost hallucinatory waking dream where I thought the world was tying itself in knots, and day and night lasted five minutes each, and you were only safe during the daytime because as soon as it got dark everything mechanical would come to life and start killing people. ** And then there's the one where it's half-dark and humid as though it were a rainy afternoon, but there's a giant, perfectly cylindrical column of crimson-red dust or fog or mist or ''something'' coming down from the sky over my hometown. It reaches the ground and begins expanding, at an extremely slow rate. I'm driving down the freeway, coming into downtown, looking up in horror, because somehow I know that anything subsumed into the column ''ceases to exist''. I'm trying to think of a place to hide, and then the dream jumps forward and for some reason I've locked myself in a janitorial room on the roof of a skyscraper, watching through the Plexiglas window in the door as the fog gets closer. ** And the one about Googling an old friend I haven't seen in almost ten years, and finding out she's the star of her own porn website. If you knew this person as well as I used to, you'd understand why I considered this far and away the single most soul-crushingly depressing nightmare I have ever had; after I woke up, I spent the rest of the ''week'' deep down in a black hole of despair. Ever since, I haven't had the courage to actually look her up. * This Troper had a nightmare where she was kidnapped by Edward Cullen and forced to be his "Bride". Sorry Twilight fangirls, it was not sexy AT. ALL. ** But at least it's funny as Hell to others. * Gigglesnort* ** Then you should hear the one I had which featured Alvin and the Chipmunks! * I once had a dream where I was standing in a very dry field of cracked mud while cheap pink plastic baby dolls I understood to be aborted fetuses climbed me. They had dry twigs in their navels to represent their desiccated umbilical cords and they were covered in cellophane to represent their amniotic sacs.

* When I (screw third person) go to sleep angry, I have these dreams where I'm beating up the person I'm mad at. This may seem nice, but as the dream goes on, I can't stop beating them. I horribly mutilate them, like once I dreamt that I bit this kid's eyelid off. It was disgusting. And its like I can't stop myself from beating them, so I either go until they're dead, or I wake up. Its terrible. * This troper, seemingly like many on this page, does not remember her dreams when she has them. Her mother, however, has shared with her a recurring nightmare where she has a half-pound of gum in her mouth. She tries to pull it out, but it's like the magician's hankerchief, and then her ''teeth'' start coming out with the gum. Probably explains why she gets freaked out about this troper's habit to eat a lot of gum at once... * KurtmanJP again. Had a really nasty one this morning: I was walking down the street and I saw this burly man and a German Shepherd. Then, in front of me, in broad daylight, he decapitates the dog with TWO knives and proceeds to follow me around with its headless body in a shopping cart. In the store. For some bizarre reason, my family gets invited for dinner at this guy's house and we're too scared to refuse. To get to his house, my family had to walk through a certain point in a wall in the grocery store in the dairy section. When my family got there, I don't remember too much about the family except the grandpa wore brown monk robes, had pure white eyes and mumbled to himself in another language (He looked a LOT like Darth Sidious!) and the 5 year old CreepyChild daughter wore yellow. One section of the house was covered in cobwebs and in another room, I had a vision of blood splattering the place. At dinner, the main course was a salad drenched in water with turkey slices for some reason. I asked the little girl if the house had ghosts or demons and she didn't know. * My literal worst nightmare: The city I live near is obviously ablaze and the smoke-filled night sky is dyed blood red by the flames. Myself and a few others are building a barricade against an unknown enemy and readying what weapons we have available. I never see the 'enemy' or find out who they are, but I know that our defences are nothing but a speed bump. I wake up before the enemy appear. I've had this dream a good few times and am getting paranoid about it... * This is a bit more weird than scary but: ** I once had a nightmare that all I can remember of it was a hottub, a robot(in the tub) who I'm half convinced may have been from an episode of ReBoot, even though I barely watched it, and a pig stuck through the wall of the dungeon we were in. Others include a knot-top guy in a Matrix-esque suit coming to exact vaguely justified vengence with a pair of glowing electro-sword thingies. * Not just a nightmare, But a fever dream too! I had come down with bronchitis, and I dreamed that I had just had sex with this one guy, but he died on top of me. I was dragged over to this big pool of blood where I found myself pregnant, and the baby was born just a few seconds later. Then the "baby" grows at a super-fast pace and turns out to be the guy I just had sex with. * This troper just dreamed that she caught her friends reading the [[OldShame awful OOC, self-insert]] {{Mary Sue}} fanfic she wrote when she was a crazy middle-school fangirl who didn't know any better. That

particular level of personal, emotional exposure, just the possibility of that side of her that she's worked so hard to bury being revealed to ''anyone'', is so dreadful that she counts this one as her actual worst nightmare. * This troper rarely gets nightmares, but a recent one had her sleepless for a straight week afterwards. I walked into a bedroom to see a man standing over a corpse, ''eating it'', and slowly changing into the form of the person he had just killed. I scream, and the killer then turns around and grins the most ''awful'' SlasherSmile you can imagine with a grotesque face and blood still dripping off of it. So then I run downstairs and hide underneath a table because I just ''know'' that...that ''monster'' is going to come kill me next, and he's ''still watching me''. Eventually my dad comes to give me a ride home, and I jump up absolutely relieved into his arms, and then urgently whisper what I just saw and beg him to get us out of this place. Good old dad nods, understands, and then I run out of the building with him into the parking lot, then notice that there are no cars parked outside. "Where's the car?", I ask. He responds "Oh, it's just farther up, I had to get a jump for the batteries." still uneasy, I continue walking behind him, then ask again, "Dad, where's the car?". The figure of my father then stops, turns around, and gives the ''exact same smile'' that the killer had. He's killed my father and taken his form and now ''he's going to kill me too.'' As he gives the most terrifying EvilLaugh and starts walking towards me, the sheer shock of everything forcibly woke me up. I couldn't sleep well for ''days'' after that nightmare, partly because I still feared that monster was still inside my head and was going to try and kill me again, and partly because I was too freaked out that my mind could concieve of something that was ''that utterly fucked up''. * This editor rarely has nightmares, but recently one ''very'' vivid dream turned into a nightmare towards the end - and she still remembers it. It was like something out of a movie: An [[TheMatrix Agent Smith]] expy walked towards a part of the city. He was then seen walking away from a building, saying something about a score to settle... and ''the illusion of the intact building faded, revealing smoking ruins''. This happened three times in succession, and the second and third times showed people ''within'' the smoking ruins (the worst being a young mother dead, but her infant child alive - damned maternal instinct!). The worst part? This editor got the idea to use this nightmare as inspiration for a montage accompanying a HannibalLecture. What the hell's wrong with me? * This troper remembers an odd nightmare about an elevator in an Victorian mansion for some odd reason. I was riding in the elevator with a bunch of friends, and despite the fact that the mansion itself was only 4-5 floors, the elevator kept going well past the 4th floor. Every 10 floors, the doors would open, and we'd experience a really cheesy effect of some sort, like swinging chandeliers and talking portraits. Everyone in the elevator was just laughing everything off. Then, we decided to head down. On the way down, the doors never opened. At around the 50th floor, I started leaning on the walls and suddenly realized that there was a creepy, old lady in the elevator with us. Standing right behind me. She was begging for our help, but

throughout the ride down to the first floor, I was insisting for the other people in the elevator not to trust her. No one was listening to me, despite the obvious signs that she should not be trusted. I forced myself to wake up right when we reached the first floor, since the lady had just turned on us. * This troper usually has nightmares whenever she watches something scary--like everyone else, but sometimes her dreams take a turn for the surreal. One dream I remembers had me walking down a hallway full of people whispering about me being a slut (even though I am--and always have been--a virgin), only to have the guidance counselor appear out of nowhere and take me to her office. The guidance counselor then asks me if 'he' touched me in any way that I hadn't liked (I don't know who the hell 'he' is, so naturally I'm utterly confused). But that's not the surreal part. After leaving the office, I went to the bathroom and threw up a fish that was ''still in one piece and definitely alive''. Suddenly, all these half-dead, flopping fish appear on the floor in puddles of water, gasping for air. I'm pretty sure that it has something to do with this troper's mild fear and distrust of men, considering the beginning, but I can't figure out for the life of me what the whole fish part was about. ** Another scenario had me sleeping in the living room (which I sleep in since I live in a one-bedroom apartment with my parents) when suddenly a spirit, demon vapor, what-have-you seeps in from under the door and sneaks up before my sleeping form...then lunges at me with fangs! I woke up shivering in the living room and unable to go back to sleep until one hour before I had to go to school. * This troper is scared shitless whenever she has a dream of a kidnapper or sexual predator. I seem to always think I'm asleep and try to wake up, but there's nothing to say I'm not actually awake. Tha terrifies me to no end. I'll never know if it's real or fake. Ironically the whole monster thing never sticks. I had a dream about TheRing with Samara, and I fought her off. Millions of her. Not scared. With a damn mechanical pencil. That confuses me to no end. * This new troper has some wierd ones. One of his favorites (Wait, that seems wrong somehow...) was at his school, and a huge windstorm came up. This troper stood inside and watched as his fellow classmates and teachers were slammed against walls, screaming in agony and being torn apart. I'm now terribly afraid of hurricanes and the like. * This troper had a very vidid nightmare that would make a good movie, she had this flesh eatting virus, pulled out of school for this expensive operation in a speical hosptial, her parents where sat down infront of a touch screen that listed things they wanted delivred to my hospital room (Magazines, candies, music, ect.), then picked out a pair of white sneakers for me to wear, after giving their good byes, the nurse put the shoes on my feet and suddenly I knocked out. Then I wake up in a gurney, in a long corrador with filled with gurneys, all with kids chatting and talking, and messing with gifts all wearing hospital gowns and various white shoes, I asked someone where I was at, she replied "The Morge", before I could ask anymore questions I reconized her as a frienemy from school (her white shoes where stelitos.) I tried to remove the shoes off my feet, put they where stuck on me like superglue, in the mist of things the roof of the

"Morge" was blown off, and a task force type team comes down and begins to attack for no reason, the explosion caused a locked vaultlike door to come open, me and the girl from school ran their to hide. Their was this entire viewing area inclosed with glass windows, you could see a long assembly line of giant machinery, and on the convayer belts where bodies of the patients, rolling by corpse like, the first machine grined all the skin off, the next machine plucked eyeballs and teeth out, then into a degutting machine, and finally a meat grinder. the troper woke up before her body reached the meat grinder. * This troper's nightmares, curiously, often have me plonked in the middle of some kind of battle or war, frequently WW1. I had a really disturbing, gory, and frighteningly realistic where I was watching the horrible fight on Chunuk Bair at Gallipoli in WW1 (there was even one guy in the nightmare who had his [[NightmareFuel face blown off by a grenade explosion]]). I also remember one nightmare where I was tied up, [[CanOnlyMoveTheEyes only able to move the eyes]], in a dark, cold, wet and muddy trench, as someone [[EyeScream gouged out an ostrich's eyeball]] right in front of my eyes. I can't look at ostriches now without shuddering inside. For some weird reason, any dreams where I see my eyeballs in the mirror, or focuses peculiarly intensely on said eyes, ALWAYS ends up as an [[EyeScream Eye Scream]] nightmare, whereby, when I first wake up, I'm checking to see if my eyeballs are still in their sockets. And, no, you DON'T want to know the worst of the eye nightmares ones. * This troper has many dreams featuring classic horror characters. Only 2 of them have been nightmares.The first dream involved this troper lost in a monochrome maze. The people sent to rescue me were Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis. However, we were menaced by Mr. Hyde who was practically a juggernaut in this dream.The second dream involved my brother and I in Vlad Dracula the impaler's castle. We were kidnapped by cultists who wished to sacrifice us to Vlad so he could live again. Dracula could communicate to the cultists through a floating painting of himself. The painting's eyes glowed when he talked. * Goosebumps: I Live In Your Basement. Read it 8 years after I originally read it and had nightares over it. It still freaked me out. Everything about Keith freaks me out, and one day my sister thought it would be very hilarious to call me "From the basement. You remember your old buddy Keith, right? I AM STILL WAITING FOR YOU!" * I have this one dream where, apparently, for some reason, I'm taking over the world, but time's moving either a hell of a lot faster or slower than it should. I'm not sure what scares me about it. I can't remember that part. Probably something about everyone, even my friends and family, are ruthlessly trying to kill me. Anyway, what really scares me is that I refuse to go to sleep, but IT'S A DAYMARE TOO!!!!! I get the feeling of it, the fear, it's horrible... Then, I had the dream when I was aloe with my little bro, parents an hour away, and horribly sick. You have no idea how torturous it was... * This troper had a dream which premise kind of escapes me at the moment, I think it had to do with some kind of apocalyptic war. Well as I walked outside I noticed that the tree I was standing on was covered in blood. At first I thought it was coming from the tree

itself (yeah, apparently in my dreams, trees can bleed) but as I took a second glance I realized it was actually coming from my shoe. I'm not one to get scared easily, so I thought it was pretty surreal and awesome. * The first time This Troper read the NightmareFuel page, the same night she had a horrible dream with pretty much everything she had read/seen running around. [[TVtropesWillRuinYourLife DAMN YOU TVTROPES.ORG]] * This troper never has nightmares. The worst dream she ever saw was about a nuclear war... but even it wasn't scary. Very depressing, but not scary. * This troper just woke up and is a bit panicked, but he wants to share his nightmare. Normaly, I can change whatever I want in my dreams, I know all that will happen, I know it's a dream, and I can force myself to wake up. This time I couldn't, I was too tired. I dreamed me and my girlfriend were slaves, stuck in a big house. She worked with a group of old women, I worked with a group of young men. The men were usually drunk, much stronger than me, and didn't like me, so I got beat up every day. Every morning, both of us were forced to get naked, and given a freezing cold shower, followed by a boiling hot one. Our boss/owner would look excited at my naked girlfriend as she convulsed from the abrupt temperature changes. We would be left naked on the ground to dry, and then he took us to our work stations. One day, after bath, he threw us into a room with the other men. I got beat up and then they raped my girlfriend. Part of me knew it was a dream, but I could not wake up. So I had to watch as they raped her again and again, until my mind was so broken I had to wake up. I woke up screaming, and spent a week crying and talking to friends, and after I got better fro the trauma, a realized the whole week had been a dream, and the nightmare was a dream within a dream. About twenty minutes ago I woke up for real, and I'm writing this so I don't forget. Now, I need a hug. * I was deathly afraid of a number of Jim Henson characters when I was little. The dream I remember the most vividly is the one where there was a ladybug walking around on a solid blue floor/wall viewed from above, when suddenly Grover (from SesameStreet) crawls in, ready to pounce the ladybug, when he instead jumps up and swallows me whole. * This troper doesn't have nightmares per say, they're just really, really fucked up. One of the most normal one dreams she has had is being flushed down the toilet by Winnie The Pooh and coming out the other side down the chimney into a creppy old house place. I have developed a few fears from my "nightmares" though: ** Clowns. (DEAR GOD I WILL NEVER WATCH POWERPUFF GIRLS AGAIN.) ** The fear that nobody actually loves you (Kudos to Sephiroth) ** Temporary but still long (about 3/4 of a year or maybe more) extreme fear of Axel from Kingdom Hearts. Just mentioning his name made me run away or scream "SHUTUP!" Soon became a running gag among my friends. ** Squicked my self horribly when I saw Xemnas (also from Kingdom Hearts) dressed up as a female hooker vampire goth...thing. * This troper has had many, but of the three that stand out most... ** One was of claymation-like, big nosed people constantly killing

this troper in gruesome ways. Usually to do with saws. What was so terrifying about this one was that this troper kept waking up from it, then falling back to sleep again. And a variation of the dream would pop right back again. It happened, like, six times in a row. Eventually this troper was just too terrified to go back to sleep. ** The second is easy enough to explain. The Trunchbull was in my house. The freaking Trunchbull. ** The third, which sounds funny enough at first... Pokemon had revolted and were taking over the world. It was fine... until the part with a six year old getting ripped to shreds by a Zigzacoon... urgh. * This troper has had a few which mostly come from movies or TV shows etc, the few I can remember are as follows: ** The pilot episode of Courage the Cowardly Dog which included a chicken with red eyes terrorising Courage, I then had a nightmare that night about hte chicken trying to kill me, I was about 6 at the time and woke up screaming and crying, once my parents actually worked out what I was screaming and crying about they found it absolutely hilarious. ** A weird creepy short film made in about 1990 as far as I can remember called The Sandman, about a creepy man/bird thing that came at night and [[spoiler:steals childrens eyes to feed to his children/bird things]] my parents used to show me this when I was younger and it gave me nightmares for about a year straight which evolved and fueled a lot of my present nightmares. ** The rest of my nightmares are practically horror movie standard and a really memorable one I had was of me, my husband and our child (this was in the nightmare in real life I'm only 18) living in a cabin in the middle of a forest, when we arrived we noticed a picture hung on the door of a family that looked exactly like us but kinda blurry. Anyway our lives continued and one day we noticed a strange mark on the daughter in the picture which then appeared later on our real daughter, this continued over a period of time getting worse and worse untill one day she dissapeared from the photo. We started hearing strage creepy noises round the house so we took our daughter and hid in a cupboard, we heard something scratching coming closer and closer then slowly the door creaked open and standing there was this little girl, our daughter from the picture, with pure white skin, blurry round the edges, black eyes, completely black eyes and just general creepyness. Then the dream ended. Creeped me out for aages * [[Tropers/{{MisterAlways}} This troper]] had... nah, not exactly a dream, it was a hallucination brought on by substance abuse. It was like "Alice in Wonderland and The Wizard of Oz get stitched together at the hip by a shitty batch of LSD". It was a bit vague, but, here goes: ** The scene involved a scarecrow (not sure if it was ''the'' Scarecrow, per se, but it was a walkin'-talkin' scarecrow, so let's assume it is) talking to Alice/Dorothy ( literally "vague" in the dream, all I could make out for sure was that it was a young girl). Keep in mind that I'm just an 'onlooker' here. The girl makes some kind of remark about the scarecrow looking weird, which infuriates him. Now I know what you're thinking - logically, he'd kill Alice. Not so. He growls something about "respecting people who look different",

and then starts TEARING HIS FUCKING FACE OFF. Okay, sure, it was made of a dufflebag filled with straw, but, holy fuck. He tore his face off, and starter pulling out clumps of the stuffing, and was eventually left with just a bloody mouth full of sharp teeth. To make it a bit worse, he was screaching " IS THIS BETTER? IS THIS BETTER?" all the while, in a voice that sounded like iron nails in a meatgrinder. So, in short, no more LSD for me. * I dreamt that I was shopping at a mall, when someone called me on my cellphone and told me that a nuclear missile was headed for town, and to go to the construction site where a helicopter would pick me up. I went to the extraction point, but the chopper didn't arrive in time. May have been influenced by the ending of ''ResidentEvil 3'' and/or the Shock and Awe level in ''CallOfDuty 4''. ** Another of this troper's nightmares: I was out camping somewhere, and one of my friends said that the [[ThatsNoMoon "Devil's Moon"]] was coming at midnight, and to get to shelter by then. Sure enough, a large orange object with a green halo appeared in the sky at midnight. Flashback of ''Majora's Mask''? ** This same troper also recently dreamt of being chased in a mansion by a glowing-orange mannequin-like monster with barb-wire tentacles. Like a ''SilentHill'' reject, or ''Prototype''. ** I have had a recurring nightmare about elevators in tall buildings. The elevator usually goes up or down at a very high speed, pinning me to the floor or ceiling of the car. And when i get to the floor, the view out the window makes me really dizzy. * I recently had a dream that is cheesy and weird in retelling, but was terrifying as I dreamed it. I was in a house made entirely of shades of light blue and grey. It looked old. I had no idea why I was here. An old lady stood in front of me, she slowly turned around, staring me in the face. "Voldemort's coming," she whispered. A panic swept over me. Somehow, I knew that Voldemort was after me. I ran around the house, trying to find a hiding spot. Right when I knew the house was going to be infiltrated, I ran, in a panic, into the bathroom and locked the door. I turned around, and there stood Voldemort. I fell on my knees, scared to death. Voldemort had the creepiest grin I'd ever seen on his face, and slowly leaned forward. He was holding a small, Styrofoam cup in his hand. Without ever speaking, he showed it to me. Inside was a gooey liquid with bits of what looked like herbs inside. I knew it was poison. Suddenly, Voldemort opened my mouth and forced the poison into my mouth. I recoiled backwards, struggling back to my feet. I coughed most of the liquid onto the ground, trying to keep from swallowing until all of the poison was out. I failed. As I swallowed, I lost all my strength, falling to the ground on my hands and knees. I heard Voldemort's cruel laugh above me. After that, I woke up, shaking. Thankfully, it was morning. I know it sounds cheesy, but it was SO scary. * This troper has had two nightmares that really stood out: ** The first was during his childhood, but it was so unsettling that he still remembers it: Basically, everyone in my neighborhood had been turned into these odd, blue demon-like creatures, but I felt certain that if I got home I would be safe. I had to run from my friend's

house down the street to my own house being silently pursued by these creatures. When I did finally make it inside, I saw one of my family members but they were facing away from me. I grabbed their shoulder, and they turned around to reveal that they had become a demon as well. It was absolutely terrifying and I cried when I woke up. It gave me chills just remembing it for almost a year. ** The second was more recent: It was a standard ZombieApocalypse setting, except I didn't quite know that yet. The zombies broke into my home and my brother ended up having to kill my mother because she'd been infected. Later we somehow arrived at my grandparents house and for some reason my mom was there, perfectly fine. When I freaked out about it, nobody else thought anything was, but I didn't get to say anything more because a plane crashed into the house and we were overrun by zombies. Somehow, probably because it was a dream, we escaped and were back in our original house. One of the walls was knocked down, but there were government assurances that the zombies were gone and everything was safe, so naturally I end up getting attacked in our kitchen. As I'm struggling, my brother walks in and punches the zombie in the head, hard enough to knock it to the floor. He grabs an axe we suddenly have for no reason and promptly decapitates the zombie. It had a much nicer ending, but the whole brother-forced-to-kill-mother was deeply disturbing. * I usually have pretty weird nightmares. The first one I remember was having to play soccer against Voldemort (don't ask). Then I had a couple of dreams where I fell from extremely high rocks. One where I was fried with Force Lightning by the Emperor. And he put it on the internet, and Tarkin watched the video. After reading the summary of "The Fly" (just reading the summary, not watching the movie!) I had dreams about losing my teeth (I checked if they were still there after waking up) and my hair. It stopped after that. But the worst nightmare I had was about being a character in a horror comedy that soon lost the "comedy" part. Two policemen sat on a bench after surviving a zombie attack. They were slightly (read:completely) insane because of the zombie attack, and they thought everybody was a zombie. Including me. First they tried to decapitate me with a...well, my German-English dictionary says "weathercock", but that makes it sound even more ridiculous. Fine. A weathercock. I can't even type this without giggling. After that didn't work, they shrank me (don't ask how) and put me in a miniature truck. Then they stuffed me in a microwave. I woke up fighting with my blanket. * This troper has had many nightmares growing up, usually involving a great apocalyptic catastrophe of some sort, including- a tidal wave that extended to airplane heights, a tornado that covered the horizon, and, when I was a little kid, me playing in the backyard when the ground starting cracking up and lava poured out, gradually rising in level and consuming the house I had fled into. However, none of them had as deeply affected as the one I just had, where I was enjoying myself in an amusement park, and then got on one of those "hangingseat" roller coasters. It went fine for a while, but then my legs hit some metal pole of some sort, causing excruciating pain. After another moment, I slipped out of my seat, and began holding onto the bottom of the seat just to survive. Then, there was the loop de loop, which

caused me to let go. I looked down, and the view was what I'd expect to see from the window of an airplane. ...I was paralyzed for five minutes after I woke up, and then when I got up, every time I moved my body quaked. ''For an hour''. * This troper recently had her first real nightmare in years, involving a bunch of genetically modified cats and rabbits that reproduced uncontrollably by splitting in half. They started to divide, making a horrible noise, and a big voice suddenly said, "IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD." Then I woke up. * This troper recently had a nightmare where he was playing TwilightPrincess and he went to Lake Hylia, he saw a Deku Baba (a venus fly-trap like creature.) in the middle of the lake, when suddenly eight massive versions rose out of the lake around it, all connected together, making it look like some kind of EldritchAbomination. * This troper dreamt that he was chatting with a dark-haired girl at a bar, when suddenly she transformed into a grotesque creature resembling the Queen Alien from ''{{Alien}}s''. She changed back shortly after. * This troper is not sure which sections this should go in, but has had hundreds of scary nightmares, three stick out prominently. The first one is where I wondered what it would be like to skydive without a parachute, so I jumped out of a plane and didn't pull it. When I hit the ground, I didn't feel anything, and suddenly my body began to rise up, and I couldn't control where I was going. I saw some really scary things that I can't remember, but they haunted me for a few days. The second one was about the time I became a horror movie enthusiast, and I had a dream that it was a normal day at Primary School, when I went to the toilet. Once I came out, I saw an EldritchAbomination resembling what seemed to a be a shark with a machete attack some people, but when I looked again, it was gone, and so were the people. The day went normally, and then halfway through everyone disappeared. I tried the phones, tried leaving by Bike, but nothing would work. I heard sounds from the Year 6 classroom, and I found all the windows blackened, all the walls with writing such as SORRYSORRYSORRYSORRY for bits and bleeding as well, and that the shark thing was hauling bodies up the walls through the ceiling, which resembled a cross between one of those Spiked Ceilings and a Zone Eater from Final Fantasy VI. I woke up after that breathing like crazy, and I just laid on the ground for about half and hour, trying to remember everything. The third one I can't remember, only that I almost screamed after waking up. Then I walked slowly to the shower, got in, and sat under the water for about 10 minutes. Needless to say, after the second one, I stopped looking up horror movies, and after the third one, I switched from Horror to Arthouse. * This troper once had a nightmare dream which was mostly so due to it being more or less a [[CrackFic Crack Fic]] with [[RuleThirtyFour Rule 34]] [[BigLippedAlligatorMoment suddenly]] involved. The characters of the [[TheMagicSchoolBus Magic School Bus]] were on a field trip to the [[HollywoodNewEngland Boston Museum of Fine Arts]] (Why were they going to an art museum to learn about science anyway?) when on the side of the road they haphazardly saw Mewtwo servicing [[HoYay

Snorlax]] [[SlashFic in the bum]] [[BrainBleach with his tail]]. Once the Magic School Bus group actually got to the museum, it turned it to be hijacked by demonically possessed [[TheExorcist Reagan McNeil]]. So yeah... * This troper recently had a dream where he was playing hide-and-seek with some kids in a big house. Not scary at all...but then he woke up, at three in the morning. Since it is typically only nightmares that wake him up in the middle of the night, he had to conclude that his brain was sparing him from what would have turned into a nightmare. [[NoodleIncident Imagining how that would have turned into a nightmare]] is possibly scarier than the dream itself would have been. It was definitely unnerving at the time, a rare example of a nightmare built purely on [[NothingIsScarier nothing happening]]. * This troper most recently dreamt that he had to go through a long building to retrieve some important object for someone. It was a DeathCourse ridden with {{Death Ray}}s, flame jets, other booby traps, {{Locked Door}}s, various puzzles, etc. * This troper once dreamt that he was chased by a pair of Grunts from ''{{Quake}} 4'' (not the ''{{Halo}}'' kind). He ran up a flight of stairs, then when the monsters followed, they turned into dogs. * When he was younger, this troper had a nightmare about giant spiders eating him. * I've already put up something here before, but recently had a dream that was so weird I had to put it up: from what I recall, I was playing with some figurines, and the TV was on showing what I belive was [[AdultSwim Adult Swim]], with one of those bumper logos up, but then the message ''changed'' into something like a cry for help, then the screen was filled with words, (or were they eyes?) then it showed the title of something, I don't remember exactly what, since it was a [[WordSalad word salad]] kinda thing, but then it showed what looked like {{Smurfs}} but the faces were all wrong... and then I woke up. * [[Tropers/{{Etheru}} This Troper]] has had nightmares about [[{{TheSecretSaturdays}} V.V. Argost]] for a while now, usually Argost has a pedophilic obsession with Zak Saturday (Might be because of Part 2 of the premiere), that's about as far as I'll go, because the rest makes me tremble in fear. * [[Tropers/{{INFJeff}} This Troper]] once had a very strange, definitely freaky dream years ago of wondering through a maze. Behind one corner was freakin' three headed dog (think of Fluffy in the first Harry Potter movie). That alone didn't make it one of the strangest dreams I've ever had though: the left head wasn't a dog's...it was SANTA CLAUSE'S HEAD! The thing didn't attack me or anything, the only thing it did was whisper to me through the Santa head in a very haunting voice. "Don't close the doooooor." I wonder what Freud would say about that... * [[Tropers/{{Crion87}} This troper]] recently had a very evil dream full of {{Gorn}} involving decapitation of people by Chinese soldiers wielding shovels, people being shoved into machinery (with all the whirring cogs and gears) in abandoned farmhouses, and it turned out that it was a future version of [[Tropers/{{Crion87}} this troper]] behind it all. * This troper has a great fear of being left alone at some point in

her life. One horrible nightmare consisted of everyone this troper was ever close to just dying and leaving her alone,the worst part was that she could not die and had to spend eterniy alone. After having this dream, she went into her sister's room to help her feel better, it resulted in a very hard kick to the stomach.... T__T ** This troper still occasionally has dreams of being abandoned or left behind on an island or some other unknown location. Everyone I know just suddenly disappears. * This troper had dreams of being stuck in a hotel-like maze. He could never escape. * This troper, as he was waking up, saw a vision of his sister in the corner, saying his name. I've had other experiences of someone calling my name as I got up, but it was usually a male voice. * From this troper's many nightmares this one stands out. In the beginning I am at my aunt's house, where my brother had supposedly died years ago at an accident. Then I discovered that the way he died was too specific to be random. It was like: he slipped, then he hit on that furniture, then he was dizzy and stumbled into the corner of a table etc. So I conclude that my aunt had for some reason murdered him. I said nothing and after some time we left. Then the dream changed, and I was at some kind of university reception because my (dead) brother had been accepted by it. The place was very dark, and looked much like a club. And at one corner there was someone with angelic wings. Then the dream changed again, I was at my aunt's house with some friends and thought it was a good idea to tell them about my brother. She heard some of our words and stood up, really angry, coming closer while shouting "what did you say?" I casually respond I was talking about the movie "The Best Aunt" , that we were talking about movies and she believed me. And then (and this is where the dream became really scary), the dream changing again, I am no longer the protagonist, but rather see at third person all the scenes. Many paranormal things start to happen, scary things appear, and to solve his brother's death's mystery, the guy had to pass a gate, having no idea what kind of gate it was. He finally concluded that reflecting himself on three particular mirrors would do it, but I was certain this would just make him die, because the reflection of his brother in a glass door had been critical to his death. I talked with some kind of spirits, pleading them to warn him with no success. And then I am dreaming first person again. And I'm at my aunt's house once again, and find out that I had missed something about my brother's death. The way he died wasn't just non-random, it formed a picture like this lVl. I knew the left l was my brother and the right was me. And the line that connected them, I could easily imagined what it meant. "Be careful, your turn is coming. I died, but you will die too. It was a message from my brother, who planned his death in order to pass it to me. And it just said that I would die. There was nothing I could do about it. It wasn't a warning, it was just information. And he died for the sole reason to let me know it. Soon after that the dream changed to some kind of epilogue, where I have woken up, am at my aunt's house and describe to my brother that dream I had. And I showed him the lVl picture, which covered the whole wall of a dark room. I tried to joke about it, pretending I wasn't scared at all, but

we both left the room frightened. ** I must say here, that at some part of the dream, somewhere about the middle where I don't remember much, I saw that the whole story was a computer game I was playing in the middle of the night. Scared as I was, I saved and exited, but I was so curious about the end, that I finally loaded it and started playing, not until the end, just a little bit further. * When this troper was seven and ill with a stomach bug, he had a rather surreal dream regarding his school being taken over by some bizarre strain of TheVirus, which turned the student body, parents of which and the teachers into strange monsters whose faces resembled Goosebumps-esque prosthetics with the approximate colour scheme of my own vomit. Pretty. This troper essentially got to watch through what appeared to be convenient timeskips as said virus took hold of more and more people - unfortunately, it seemed he was the only one who noticed anything was wrong. Eventually, though, this troper and his mother (don't ask why she was in school, it was pretty trippy) were the last regular humans in the school, at which point everything turned overtly hostile. We ended up hiding out in the locked assembly hall... until the doors came crashing down and let's just say I was the last one left. I woke up after that. That probably doesn't sound scary, but consider that I was young, ill, weak, frail, woke up in a dark room panting heavily with a sticky feeling all over me. I went into the bathroom to get a drink, and what did I see in the mirror? My face. Partially covered in my vomit and all its pretty, hauntingreminder colours. I am ''so glad'' I was off school for the next few days with my illness, because I don't think I could have faced it at the time. I've had similar dreams occasionally throughout my life, but they've been more like an AffectionateParody of my original childhood nightmare by comparison. * [=Mcb01932=]: I've had many nightmares, but these stand out: ** As the dream opened, I was walking around my aunt and uncle's house. However, it was a lot bigger and had a different layout than the actual thing. One thing was really out of the ordinary: there were two basements. No, there was not a sub-basement; There were two seperate basement rooms on the ''same level''. I went down into the first, and it kind of looked like their actual basement at the time. There was nothing down there, so I went back upstairs. I had been warned earlier not to go into the second basement. However, someone ran up to me saying, "Dude! Come down here, there's something really cool!". I followed him, ignoring the warning. When I stepped into the main room, I found a huge EldritchAbomination. It looked almost like a totem pole with a face on each level. The faces got scarier and scarier as I looked up. When I saw the top, the hideous face screamed at me and I woke up. ** I once dreamed that I was riding in the car down a street in my subdivision. All of the sudden, the sky changed color, the landscape warped into some kind of TimBurton-esque hellscape, and every house on the street turned into a glaring, hideous, monster head. My parents didn't seem to notice and contined driving down the horrific street. ** As a young kid, I had recurring nightmares that there was a huge scary face on the wall at the bottom of the stairs. It always tried to

suck me into its mouth as I climbed the stairs. I would always hide in my room, but in there a bunch of creepy toys came to life and started to creep toward me. I would reach for the lights but they never worked. Then I would rush downstairs and always fall down them, ending the dream. ** I used to have a lot of dreams about [[MonsterClown MonsterClowns]] at one point. In one, I was in a huge mall. I was watching myself in third person. I don't remember all the details, but at this one part, the mall contained some kind of ride in which you lie down on a scalelike thing and it moves (like a less intense mechanical bull). I lie down on it and saw a creepy pendulum swinging above me. Then, it suddenly changed to first person, and from above the scale, a terrifying MonsterClown appeared out of nowhere. He had a hideous face and razor-sharp teeth. In another one, I was simply in my room, talking to someone. Then, I think, the person disappeared, and instantly, the ''very same'' clown was right in my face! ** Once, I had a dream that I was watching a strange movie. At one part, my brother told me that "this part is really scary, don't look." So I didn't. Then I was suddenly watching the movie again, and I decided to face my fears and not look away at the part my brother told me about. It seemed normal at first, but then the camera panned through a window...and that's when I suddenly felt like I was ''in'' the movie. That's when I saw it: a horrifying 50 foot tall troll that lunged at me and screamed. I had trouble falling back asleep that night. * Hi, it's [[Tropers/{{Demetrios}} moi]] again, and I'm back with another recent nightmare. While this may come as a surprise to no one, I did indeed have a nightmare about ''FanFic/BartTheGeneral''; the [[IAmNotShazam fan-video series]], not the funny episode from the first season. When my friends asked me what about the videos scared me so much, I gave these three reasons: "the animation was abhorrent, the jokes were on the ''FamilyGuy'' level of offensiveness, and it had more terrifying images than your typical Simpsons HalloweenEpisode." And that's not all. Stop me if this is just the usual Internet chatter that's not meant to be taken seriously, but the [=YouTube=] posters who positively commented on the videos sounded like they were in this insane {{cult}} that actually worshiped [[EldritchAbomination this thing]]. Okay anyway, the night after I watched it, I couldn't sleep because of the images playing over and over again in my mind. But it didn't end when I woke up, because when I woke up and thought I was back in the safety of my bedroom and reality, I felt like my very room was haunted. I thought I saw a ghostly white shape hovering above my bed, and my alarm clock, the numbers on which normally glow yellow, seemed more like an eerie red-orange. Needless to say, this nightmare was debilitating, and it took me a while to sleep comfortably again. Of course, my road to recovery included never watching ''Bart The General'' again. And my new sleep mask provides a much deeper and more relaxing sleep, in addition to looking good. :) About the positive comments on YouTube, I know this might sound mean, but at the time it made me wish the [[ChurchMilitant Inquisition]] from ''{{Warhammer 40000}}'' was real, and with it the GreyKnights and [[AmazonBrigade Sisters of Battle]]. Wow, I wrote a lot this time.

* Just last night, I (ultimatepower22) had one. The entire world, presumably, was ruled by an unnamed horror, who lived in a palace made of what appeared to be bone, suspended over a volcano with a perpetual storm above it, with a moat of blood surrounding it. Past the moat were slave-worked fields, said slaves warped into unimaginable...things...by some nightmarish surgery (presumably). Men with heads of dogs and swords for hands, women with all their limbs amputated and used as living wombs to birth victims dozens at a time. Both with the digestive tracks of dungbeetles, so they must survive purely on feces. More victims grafted into living machinery...it goes on. Needless to say, I (extremely rapidly) woke up. * I have had a recurring dream of the computer being taken over by some evil, scary, unremovable malware program. * This troper once dreamt of running through a knee-deep flooded maze, similar to ''Silent Hill 2'''s Labyrinth, while being chased by the red fog from ''SilentHill 3''. * This troper dreamed that there was a RobotWar going on in his town. The invading robots were {{Cyber Cyclops}}es somewhat resembling the Zeons from ''{{Gundam}}'' and were [[ColorCodedForYourConvenience color coded according to rank]], like in many video games. ** A more recent dream, not really a nightmare, but hell of a MindScrew: I dreamt I was [[OutOfClothesExperience naked]] and surrounded by these children who could fly and were given {{immortality}}, but at the cost of [[NeverGrewUp being unable to grow up]]. I also had the power of levitation/flight. * This troper had a very strange nightmare recently. After a long dream involving things like walking through a post-apocalyptic Los Angeles, he was inside what he knew was the "last scene" of ''[[ChildsPlay Child's Play]]'' (although it didn't have any actual connection to the movie). It was very creepy, with Chucky torturing a middle-aged couple in extremely bizarre and horrifying ways that only made sense within the dream (like cutting their legs into ribbons, putting them on a desert island-sized planet for eternity, and so on). I was simultaneously Chucky's accomplice, one of the victims, and a spectator, and it was very unpleasant even though there wasn't really any threat of anything happening to me. So what did I do? I pulled out a laptop (in the dream, still) and went to the TV Tropes page for ''Child's Play'', to add this scene under the High Octane Nightmare Fuel entry! Of course, when I woke up the first thing that came to my mind was to do exactly that, until I realized that "scene" was entirely made-up in my head. [[TVTropesWillRuinYourLife Ugh...]] * This troper had two to share. ** I once dreamed that I was wandering in a ruined deserted city, extremely thirsty and desperately seeking water. I finally found a small puddle and at that moment, I had a flashback to the past: there had been a nuclear war. Human civilization and the world as we knew it were gone. I have no more shelter, no rations, no water; I am severely dehydrated but if I drink from the puddle the raidation poisoning would kill me (i.e. faster). The effects of nuclear apocalypse was horrible, but not as horrifying as the despair and hopelessness induced by your own approaching death. That dream kept this troper awake for a good long while.

** A second one was more recent, featuring this troper as a trooper leading a [[RagtagBunchOfMisfits group of survivors]] evading Xenomorphs in a small rural town. On their way they passed several groups of Xenomorphs: not patrol parties searching for troper & co., but colonizing parties leaving for nearby towns----and there's nothing we can do to stop them. But once the troper realized he's actually dreaming, [[CrazyAwesome awesomeness]] and HilarityEnsues: he flew up to the sky, harness the lightning for energy, and blasted the hive to kingdom come. * This troper had one when he was about eight - after learning from the encyclopedia that there were several thousand species of insects, and countless billions of them in number (and just plain being scared of them already) I dreamt I was lying immobile on the dining room floor as an endless carpet of every species crawled over me, and one very large frightful beetle walked into my open hand. (Hey, I was eight) * I have never had a nightmare like this, but how freaky would it be if I had a nightmare about ''{{Furbie}}s''? * This troper, wolftickets1969, underwent a sleep study for sleep apnea. During it I had several horrible nightmares, including being rejected from graduate school, broken sinks and clogged toilets, [[GoMadFromTheRevelation losing my sanity]] while my estranged oldest brother regained his, and trying to commit suicide in-dream by being run over, [[AndIMustScream but the powers that be wouldn't let me die]]. On the good side, I dreamt of climbing a long stairway similar to the one in my house, but several stories higher, then going through a dark corridor, at the end was a room full of various treasures. * A few days ago, this troper had a dream in which he was a female elf vampire. Okay, a little weird at this point, but not even that strange by his standards. Troper was forced to hide from the sun under bedsheets. Then some cataclysm approached that was going to kill everyone in the society that wasn't married, so there was a mass random wedding. First lesbian kiss. Not thinking this is a nightmare? Somehow troper was assigned ''his mother''. * I dreamt a few years ago that that a winged demon resembling a [[HPLovecraft Nightgaunt]] launded on the roof of my sunroom. I was equipped with a "gunblade" type weapon that shot [[LightningGun lightning]], which i used to destroy it, through the glass nonetheless. * This troper gets nightmares on a weekly basis, often I forget them quickly, but there are a few that I just don't. Every single one of these dreams I have had involves me being stabbed, either by someone else intentionally or by myself accidentally. I swear I could feel the pain for just a brief second before the waking up from the shock. After playing the first [[FatalFrame ''Fatal Frame'']] game, [[ItGotWorse it got worse...]] I had this one nightmares about a ghost thats looks so much like Kirie, whats different is that each of the hands floating around her all held the knives... I could not get it out of my head until I [[http://anonymous738.deviantart.com/art/OnryoJapanese-Ghost-Girl-158516566 drew it down.]] * AAAAGH! This troper(wolftickets1969) dreamt that [[AlienInvasion aliens were invading the planet]] and transforming people into weird

[[AndIMustScream inanimate objects]]. Not a good idea to sleep through the light. Or without the apnea mask. ** In another one of my pre-CPAP nightmares, I dreamt that me, my mom, and my sis were arriving home at dusk, when two men in [[BadassLongcoat trenchcoats]] and [[SunglassesAtNight sunglasses]] with mullet hairstyles pulled up in a BMW. One was blonde, the other was a brunette, both were armed with submachine guns. The [[BlondGuysAreEvil blonde guy]] fired several shots at us. Then I woke up. ** I frequently also have dreams about {{disgusting public toilet}}s. * [[Tropers/{{Broken-Hedgehog}} This troper]] had a nightmare once where I was trapped in a Kirby/Narutaru crossover universe... Never read the Corocoro Kirby manga right before sleeping. NEVER! * This troper often has dreams that other people would consider nightmares, but her personal definition of nightmare is that she has to be scared while in the dream. By her definition, she hasn't had a nightmare since fourth or fifth grade (that involved a ping-pong table and a lot of spiders) until a few months ago, when she had one of the strangest dreams she ever had. It started in the 1940s, when a bunch of astronomers saw a giant explosion far away in space which they discovered was apparently the destruction of Pluto. Then the dream skipped to the 1950s, and suddenly Neptune was destroyed. 1960s, Uranus. 1970s, Saturn. 1980s, Jupiter. 1990s, the asteroid belt. 2000, Mars. The dream kept skipping decades until it came back to this troper. She doesn't really know what she did in that dream, but she does remember that she was terrified out of her mind because she knew...Earth was next. ** Of course, this troper has also had dreams that didn't scare her while she had them but are ironically Nightmare Fuel in Real Life, especially the one she had two nights ago about gleefully performing a self-lobotomy out of boredom. The dream ended with a headache slowly building up, and her thinking "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea." * This troper had a dream where she was being chased by a swarm of laser butterflies. Yes, laser butterflies. This troper does have normal nightmares that are actually considered scary, included one was stuck in a horror movie marathon, but this troper was just as scared. When something is chasing after you and melting your bedroom right after you go to bed, it doesn't matter how scary they look. * This Troper,aside from many drowning nightmares, had one nightmare were she was being chased along an empty highway through a forest, by angry World of Warcraft fanatics that had pet crocodiles. The nightmare ended when I bounded on all fours from the highway into my living room then out the front door and realizing it was a dream and jerking my head up so that I woke up startled curled up in bed... One of my most odd dreams... * This Troper only remembers dreams when they scare the heck out of him. The one I remember the clearest is me in a wheelchair in the middle of a basketball court and a monster that looks like the Yellow Devil from MegaMan except for green and with a partially melted skull in the middle of it. I try to wheel myself away and almost succeed but at the last second the monster launches a huge acid ball at me only a small bit lands on me but it slowly dissolves my body starting at my

left side all the while I'm watching from the monster's point of view after it launched the acid ball. The worst part was even though I woke up in terror a small part of me was laughing at my dream self dissolving into a puddle slowly, I still find it horrifyingly hilarious. * Last night, this troper had a dream where he was watching videos on YouTube. Suddenly, he came across a video where he saw a picture of a blond, female character who looked like she came out of a HannaBarbera cartoon. When eerie music started playing and the picture started to zoom in slowly, I started to realize it was a Screamer video. I scrolled down the screen and took my earphones off quickly. I missed the horrific face, but unfortunately, I still heard a scream coming out of my earphones. This left me with an uneasy feeling when I woke up from the dream. ** Here's another one: I was on TVTropes minding my own business when all of a sudden, letters started to overlap each other. I was confused and scrolled down to see if it will go away, but it didn't. Then, the computer had a virus and I was scared, not knowing what to do. For some reason, a pixeled blue bird and a blue circle appeared in the middle of the screen and I heard a horrible scream. It's like the work of [[spoiler: Uboa and Zalgo]]. * I once dreamt that I was walking around Green Lake in Seattle, when I saw a [[ButterflyOfDoom strange-colored butterfly]] fly by. I knew I had to catch it or something terrible would happen. Unfortunately, it flew out of reach, then a [[GoshHornet swarm of killer bees]] (like in ''720 Degrees'') started chasing after me, and eventually caught up and stung me to death. * I was sent on a mission into a MadScientist's fortress to disarm his [[DoomsdayDevice "doomsday bomb"]], equipped with a ''BionicCommando''-style grappling hook, but I ran out of time before I could reach the control room. The dream shifted to a view of Earth from space. Cue EarthShatteringKaboom. * Several years ago, I dreamt that I was riding a ferry boat, and as it approached the dock, the clear waters turned oily black. A precognition of the Great Gulf Oil Spill? Or the impending EndOfTheWorldAsWeKnowIt? * About a year ago, I dreamed that the zombie apocalypse was occurring in a relatively strange way: the zombies were invisible, and every day it would rain appointment cards--you know, like the ones you get from the dentist--for those who were infected, giving them the date and time that they would turn. I got one, and ran home crying to tell my parents, and I couldn't find my sister nor could I reach any of my friends, and then my dad told me to go to my room, and he told me to close my eyes and go to sleep as he put the barrel of a shotgun against my temple. I woke up crying, even though in retrospect it was a rather silly dream. * This tropers earliest nightmare occurred when she was 3-4. (Switching perspective) I couldnt move, and was gripped with paralyzing fear, and the dream cut to a series of different images, all of gritty, windowed enclosures, the sort of thing youd see at a reptile hall, filled with dirt with a wide, visible tunnel. Sometimes the tunnel had demented-looking plastic dinosuars. I dont remember if

the other tunnels had anything. Each of these were punctuated with a sort of evil laughter mixed with this horrific, inhuman shriek of pain. Later I was placed in a demonic version of my room, still immobile, with large reptiles slowly creeping forward to eat me. When I suddenly awoke, I couldnt get back to sleep for hours. Whenever I closed my eyes, I would see this turtle/snake/dinosaur thing creeping closer to me. The odd thing about this is that Im not afraid of reptiles and never was. * This troper had a nightmare where she can see the planet Saturn was falling right on Earth. Yep a dream where the world was ending. * I was exploring an abandoned railroad with some friends, and they told me the tale of an engineer who died in an accident on said railroad. As we were passing through a tunnel, I heard a train whistle, and we rushed to get out. The train turned out to be a military train armed with cannons and machine guns, driven by the engineer's ghost. I ran for cover, but the machine guns shot me to death. * I used to frequently dream of having SuperDrowningSkills. * With my CPAP machine, I occasionally have false awakenings (or is it sleep paralysis?) where the machine goes up to max pressure, threatening to burst my lungs, and it won't let me exhale and I can't take the mask off. Sometimes, my eyes are stuck partially open in SP episodes. * This troper had a nightmare about a giant dog that attacked him and was about to [[NightmareFuel eat his head off in one bite.]] * I subverted this. I had a dream where I was chased by a sereal killer, but I won. I worked together with some other people and we rigged a booby trap with dynamite and killed him. * [[JusticeReaper Me]] again. Just last night I had an...odd dream that went right into this. In it, a man and a woman (characters from the South African soap opera ''Generations'') were on a blanket in a park, at night-time, [[FanService getting freaky with one another]]. Then the woman playfully crawled on her hands and knees into some nearby bushes in a faux attempt to escape the man's advances - only to let out one blood-curdling scream because she'd stumbled upon [[NightmareFuel a shallow grave-pit with]] [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel dismembered and beheaded corpses]] half-buried and strewn all about the area. Major FanDisservice, that. * I dreamt that a friend of mine was killed and [[DropDeadGorgeous her naked corpse]] [[StuffedIntoTheFridge dumped on my home street]]. Luckily I found out she was still alive in real life. * This troper vividly remembers a dream from when she was three or four. She was trapped in a very small room roughly the size of, let us say, a truck. There were no windows or doors. The walls, ceiling and floor were composed of stark white walls with evenly-placed, dark holes. Inside, I was crammed in with with maybe 15-ish late-middle aged to elderly women, all of whom were dressed perfectly normally, carrying handbags and the like. After a short while, a man began to talk over a loudspeak or.. something, calmly explaining the procedure for... whatever was going on; we were to sit quietly and wait as poisonous gas seeped in through the holes in the walls, and that we would die within 5-20 minutes or so. They all began to read, or hum,

or stare quietly into space. I panicked and tried to ask the woman next to me what was happening. She calmly pulled a gameboy color and a game out of her handbag and handed it to me, told me to be quiet, and went back to reading her book. I kept freaking out, and woke up a few minutes later. The [[FridgeHorror implications]] of this dream are pretty disturbing, in retrospect- old ladies and a small child trapped in a small room, all to be killed via poison gas... [[WorldWarII jeez.]] Strangely enough, I only realized this recently. In a way, this dream probably led to [[NightmareFetishist how I am now....]] * This troper once dreamt of being trapped in a hell-like dimension, fighting a demon similar to the FinalBoss of ''SilentHill''. After defeating the monster, the dimension started collapsing on itself, and like the BadEnding of ''SH1'', there was no escape. A more recent nightmare involved faceless mannequins appearing everywhere, and I knew that those who looked at them too long would be turned into mannequins themselves, like a relic from SCPFoundation. * [=Mcb01932=]: Remember my stories of nightmares from my childhood? Well, I had my first real nightmare in several years last night (I'm 17), and it was an extremely bizarre and freaky MindScrew. I have no idea what caused it, but it may have something to do with reading the entries for ''{{Coraline}}'' and CreepyBasement before bed.\\ First, I was lying in bed. In my dream, I was having trouble sleeping because I had suddenly gained a memory that someone had told me about a freaky dream they had, in detail, before I went to bed. Then, still in the dream, I fell asleep, entering another dream.\\ I had the exact same nightmare that the unknown person had described to me. I was still in bed, but was visited by a ghostly jester who informed me that I would have to pass three terrifying tests for an unknown reason (I already knew what they were from the memory). I could not remember the first test. In the second test, I had to stop a monster behind my bed from killing me without looking. As part of the final test, I had to walk through the closet into another, creepy part of the house. When he explained the first test, I didn't know what he meant at first. The monster spun me around; he looked like a huge, muscular humanoid with an extremely deformed face. He screamed at me and I woke up, but I was still in the dream. I passed the test by putting up my hands when I felt a weird presence (don't ask; it's hard to explain). The monster and jester disappeared, and I knew what to do next. I got out of bed and walked into the closet. The person had told me that the closet was the scariest part, but it wasn't too bad, just creepy. At this point, I actually knew I was dreaming, and I wanted to wake up, fast. Something deep inside told me that it was going to get worse. A creepy woman walked past me, eying me suspiciously. As I turned a corner, the hallway changed from a mansion to a hospital/school hallway. I saw two vaguely human shadowy figures standing in a room at the end of the hall. As I began to walk toward them, I suddenly woke up for real.\\ Something tells me that my own mind had ended the dream. I had just realized I was dreaming and feared what horrors would lie ahead in the area behind the closet door. If the dream had not ended there...well, I don't even want to think about what kind of hell that dream could have become. Just thinking about this possibility scares the hell out

of me, even more than the dream itself. The mysterious man had told me earlier that the closet was the scariest part, and he was probably right. I had never seen what he had been talking about. * One night, I had this dream: I, a man, ran through a corridor with white walls and concrete floor, clutching a baby doll-baby in my arms. The birdbone-thin woman (a pale brunette) running behind me, barefeet and white night-shirt, was captured by our pursuers as I turned left 'round a corner. I wanted to save her but there wasn't time; They knew I had betrayed our Boss. I kept running and came to a dead end, but walked through a transparent wall to the right, then left again. This silent patch of corridor ended in an elevator, and in the left wall there were two doors. I ripped the baby doll-baby in half and threw one piece through each doorway. As I locked the doors I knew that it she would now be safe. Then I entered the elevator and ascended through the building, and I could see all the corridors and the people looking for me and I knew for a fact that it was over. The lift came to a halt, and I walked out into a hallway where a ramp curved upwards to the left and the exit was to the right. Facing me was a rectangular archway and a suitclad man. I wlked towards the exit but another man, descending from a thin flight of metal stairs by the elevator, ran up behind me. I felt cold metal against my neck, and in a low wail I begged him: "Please-please-please!". They led me through the rectangular doorway into a huge room where a group of people stod gathered for a photograph. In the front-center of the group was a wheel-chair, that belonged to the now dead Boss. They made me sit down. There was no fussing we didn't want to alarm the musicians packing up to our right. Yet I knew that I would be executed, shot, and my death would be in a picture. I looked at the old camera old like the ones from the late 1800's, with a tripod and a cloth. I looked at the mosaik plates 'round the doorway. All were brightly coloured and partly transparent; some were a golden yellow, others a cold red, others yet a greenish blue. And then I could only look at the gun. I saw the trigger being pulled. A woman's voice behind me said "Smile". I smiled. The shot was fired. But unlike most dreams were I die, I didn't wake up. I couldn't see. I felt blood trickle down my forehead and the woman covering it with her hands to not alert the joking and laughing musicians, remember? I couldn't see. I couldn't breathe and coughed blood; "Now, now! No coughing!" said the woman. I tried to hide my blood with my hands. I couldn't see. And then I woke up. Several times that day I would feel the blood trickle down my forhead, and I would feel weak and sick, and shiver. ** Another dream was equally sickening to me, but still the opposite of the dream described above. In this nightmare, I was a murderer. I recall hiding someones head in a bundle of sheet cloth and forcing someone against the wall outside my (real) room, next to the staircase. I began to strangle him and his artery burst. Blood covered my hands and face, and swooshed in a wave across the floor. The puddle was several centimeters deep. And perhaps more sickening than the blood was the guilt. * Not really a nightmare, but I consider it to be one: I was in this office's snackroom wearing a Porta-Potty costume (no idea why) when Ralph Macchio suddenly appears from a puff of smoke and there were

cream pies sitting on the table. Macchio then instructed me to throw the pies at this alligator who was wearing a [[BowtiesAreCool green bowtie]] and a [[NiceHat weird teal hat.]] So I threw the pies and after all 15 pies were gone I approached the alligator and it gave me a big hug. "That's not a nightmare!" you say? Well, it left me confused and crying when I woke up, so that is a nightmare to me! * This troper regularly has strange and weird dreams. Twisted shadows coming from mirrors, uncanny voices whispering in his ear (usually they start whispering BEFORE he falls asleep), undead children, body horrors, blood, guts and meat forming strange structures, lovecraftian geometries, and sometimes even things completely incomprehensible in normal condition. Closest word to call it would be abstract concepts, not even images. Definitely qualifies for nightmare dreams. Though he is completely unafraid and feels at home. And since early childhood nothing was ever able to harm him in his dreams. And he always knows it. * This one only remembers a few dreams, but among the most memorable were me being tricked into killing one of my dogs, me pulling aside my pillow to discover a nest of gigantic ants in the space between my bed and my wall, and a picture of my brother on a swing turning grotesque and white-eyed (that one courtesy of an internet [[JumpScare Screamer]] earlier that day, fucking Liquid Generation...) * This Troper has had several nightmares that have woken her up in the middle of the night, however, this one is the scariest she can ever remember having: I'm at my grandmother's house. It's dark out, just past dusk. I walk over to the front porch, and pick up a set of I-Pod headphones sitting on the stoop. I pick them up and put them in my ears. A low voice, no more than a whisper, says through the headphones ''"Wrong...wrong...wrong...wrong"'' over and over again. I pick up the other end of the chord...and it's not plugged into anything. I pull out the earbuds, but keep on hearing it, ''"Wrong...wrong...wrong...wrong..."'' never changing pitch, never getting louder. I run towards the driveway, and suddenly find myself in a long, wide hallway with my parents. I start crying and hugging them, trying to tell them what's happening while the voice keeps on repeating in my head. We suddenly look to one end of the corridor, and the big door at the end starts to open. A bright light spills out, consuming us...then nothing. * This troper had one of these, and it was, by far, the scariest dream I've ever had. It started out fairly normally: I was in my social studies class, when all of a sudden, some kid threw a chair and broke the window. I lifted the blind to see the damage, and my friend Kristen (who isn't in that class with me) was there. She asked, "Hey, is anybody here really afraid of the dark?" Right then, it turned into what can only be considered a MindScrew. The "camera", I guess you could say, started racing all over the freaking place, and people were talking about who-knows-what, though I'm fairly certain it was about... [[TheSlenderManMythos a certain suit clad humanoid.]] Then, everything turned black, and all I could do was hear. I heard voices saying things like "there's no escape" and "he will find you", and I got this weird pressure in my ears. Every so often, I'd see what looked like a man in a suit coming closer, and closer... and then it

just ended. I haven't been able to sleep since. * This Troper has reoccurring nightmares of grotesque creatures in my room. They never really do anything but they fill her with intense dread. She's even made a list of descriptions of what they look like! * I still dream of accidentally leaving a door unlocked and someone coming into my house. Although I've never been robbed, I have occasionally left a door unlocked at night. ---Return to NightmareDreams, but please leave the light on. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NightmareFuel TroperTales. Simply find the right ones. The wonders of the internet include anonymity and the willingness to hold nothing back. Within that space you never know what terrifying things may be lurking, waiting for you to naively wander onto the doorstep of nightmares.

See TroperTales/NightmareFuelDisneyParks and TroperTales/NightmareFuelRealLife examples. There were so many, they broke the page. [[foldercontrol]] [[folder:Advertising]] * This troper has always been sympathetic, and slightly amused, at the fears listed in {{Nightmare Fuel}}. But she has never really been afraid of any of them. She doesn't really think that things that aren't meant to be scary, well, are. However, that all changed when she recently saw a commercial featuring a talking pothole! It was quite unnerving! And for some reason brought to mind the horrifying oil monster from 'The Raft" part of Creepshow 2. * This Troper has a rather strange fear of whales. Our stations have started playing those damn Pacific Life commercials with the whales swimming. ''Those freak this Troper right the hell out.'' She gets a mini panic attack whenever she sees it and her parents warn her whenever it pops up, although they don't have the courtesy to change the channel (or just not mention it, because she probably wouldn't have noticed it if she was doing something else). This Troper thinks her mother gets some kind of sick pleasure out of seeing this Troper jump back in fear at something admittedly ridiculous. (This Troper always gets her back with a plastic snake or toy mouse, though. * This tropette has serious issues with any commercial where there is no background music, just a singular person's voice talking. For some reason the utter silence other than the voice just creeps her the fuck out. She scrambles for the remote to change the channel as quick as she can. It doesn't help that those commercials gave her nightmares either...That's not normal, right? * [[Tropers/TechPowah I]] always expect this to occur on TV every now

and then, having grown up watching Billy and Mandy, but never in a ''phone commercial!'' I was watching the ad for [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f12gqM5tvvo some new phone plan]] with the story of the commercial being that this crazy (possibly wannabe) girlfriend sitting on a tree branch looking at some dude, saying how with her phone, she can check his Twitter to see if he talked about her, blah blah blah, forced-and-canned-scare-attempts, blah, saying how the phone deal was crazy. Then, a strike of lightning occurs, the girl disappearing away, and the small print for the details of the phone plan showed up. At the very last minute, '''''THE GIRL SHOWS UP, HER FACE RIGHT IN THE CAMERA, GIVING A POSITIVELY EPIC SLASHER SMILE!''''' I freaked out so badly, I had my mom come to my room asking what was the matter. That face would've put to shame ShockSite worthy last-second-scary-pic variety videos. [[/folder]]

[[folder:Anime & Manga]] * This troper saw the ending of DeathNote just before she went to bed. Needless to say, seeing all that blood at the final scene before shutting her eyes and letting her subconscious pray on her phobias wasn't a good idea... ** I love DeathNote, but it gave me some of the most ''unsettling'' nightmares. Surprisingly enough most of them weren`t about Kira, but about [[NewMediaAreEvil Demegawa]]. His greed for money and attention and his [[TheQuisling Quisling-status]] are so ''damn'' creepy. I had nightmares about him wanting to kill grade schoolers live on TV or [[MassHypnosis brainwashing people via television]]. However the most scary Nightmare about Death Note, was about me figuring out, that Death Notes were real. (No, I do ''not'' actually believe this, it was just a dream.) I wanted to post it on the internet, but just before I got around to press the Submit-button, I suddenly felt a horrible ''real'' pain in my chest and fell to the ground. When I looked at the door, I saw Light standing there, with his Death Note in hand, [[SlasherSmile grinning]] and saying: "[[SarcasmMode Wow! You`re so smart!]]" Then he looked at his watch and added: "Oh, and by the way: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1..." Then I woke up. The next day I saw the doctor, because I thought, that the pain I felt in my dream could be the result of a real heart issue. He found that my heart was perfectly ok. Seems like I just have a ''really'' vivid imagination... *** I've had moments like that too. I've never watched Death Note, but Higurashi was the cause of that for me. * Oddly enough, the more nightmare fuel an anime has, the more this troper enjoys it. It might have something to do with the higher maturity level, but she can't deny that seeming a well drawn freakish monster or utterly bizzare scene pleases her immensely. ** This Troper wasn't bothered by that, but instead only mildly freaked out by that look in Ryuk's eyes in the very final scenes. * I'm a big fan of the anime, "Higurashi no Naku Koro ni", but sometimes, I make the mistake of watching it at night, causing me to be scared shitless that I'll be murdered in my sleep. Well, obviously that never happened, but something I never thought would scare me

happened; I hallucinated that red-eyed Hanyuu was standing right in front of the recliner I sleep in. She's a good character, not evil whatsoever. But damn, that scared me. I mean, imagine it being like, 1am, all dark in your room, save for the computer and TV, and someone who is supposed to be fictional pops up at the end of your bed, staring at you with glowing red eyes. And the hallucination didn't end right away, I had to blink and stare for a few moments before it finally faded. ** Higurashi is an easy source of NightmareFuel. This Troper made the mistake of watching all of Onikakushi-hen just before bed. The resulting nightmare, of course, featured the killer janitor brigade, beating friends to death, and clawing out one's own throat. [[SarcasmMode FUN.]] ** [[NightmareFetishist Ooh, sounds like a fun anime. Do you know where I can watch it?]] * When I was little, I used to be very scared of an episode of [[KimbaTheWhiteLion Kimba The White Lion]] called "A Friend Indeed", which I had on video. In that episode, there was a blind leopard that lived in the sewers underneath Paris. The leopard looks very creepy. He had greenish-yellow eyes, and his roar sounded very scary. It sounded like it was going right through you. I couldn't sleep for months after watching that episode, and I kept having nightmares about that leopard for a really long time afterward. * Even though it may not be scary, Never watch Demashita Powerpuff Girls Z. It's Nightmare Fuel to your childhood. BUTTERCUP IS A F**KING LESBIAN!!! ** [[SarcasmMode AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!]] ** [[SarcasmMode Yeah, lesbians are terrifying.]] *** No... Buttercup is more "Even the girls want her" than lesbo. must be her bokuko-ness. [[/folder]] [[folder:Dreams]] * This troper had a nightmare when is was 8 there was some creepy guy in my house in a black cloak who ran at me and started attacking me. i was yelling "DAD HELP" in real life even though i was asleep, the creepy part is, i felt it.then i woke up.... * Not sure if this fits here, or in the SlenderManMythos Troper Tales page, but This Troper once had a brief but terrifying [[SlenderManMythos Slender Man]] dream. It started out with me getting out of bed for a glass of water, thus leading me to believe I was actually awake. As I approached the kitchen, passing by the living room, (all of the lights were off, by the way) I saw a shadowy figure. Moving closer I realized "Oh, Fuck! It's Slendy!" He proceeded to throw me across the room without lifting a finger, and I swear I felt the impact of my body against the wall. He started advancing towards me, and as he raised his arm up preparing to strike, I woke up. Needless to say, I did not sleep at all for the rest of that night. * I once had a dream where I was hiding behind a couch for some reason, suddenly 2 feet appeared and the bottom of the couch. I stood up and Jason Vorheese from Friday the 13th was standing there, he suddenly raised his machete and it cme down on my head, it split my

head in half. That disturbed the living hell. * This troper has been haunted all her life by dreams of being trapped as nothing but consciousness inside a huge rusting machine with huge gears that turned ever so slowly and making the most godawful noise that could ever be imagined. Hell Is That Noise. Between being trapped in the hell machine were scenes of a sunny green garden, a single white daisy growing out of the grass. The normality of that, in contrast with those gears grinding and pistons pumping, made me want to scream. Except I couldn't. ** HOLY S--- I have a similar recurring dream. Except, instead of a machine, it's a huge... castle/volcano thing. That is slowly growing bigger. There is a quiet clicking noise in the background. And with each click I see a single white daisy... No idea why it's so scary, but it is. * This troper once had a dream about having to fight off a whole gang of werewolves who had [[AllYourBaseAreBelongToUs somehow gotten entrance into his house.]] The worst part of it was [[TransformationTrauma watching them transform]] and having to fight them off while knowing that if even one of them bit or clawed me, that would be the end of me. ** The same troper has had nightmares about being overrun or eaten by rats, including [[RodentsOfUnusualSize monster-sized rats]]. He HATES and fears rats in real life and can't stand to be within five feet of them, for fear of their disease-carrying and their potential aggressiveness. * This troper recently had a dream: you know the demoman from TeamFortress2? His funny 'Kah-bewm!' taunt? Not so funny when you hear and see a massive explsion in your face right after he does it, making you wake up with a jolt so big you fall out of bed and hit your head against your bedside drawers, almost knocking you out. I was afraid to sleep incase that happened again. What made it worse was that the explosion sounded so damn realistic, and rung in my ears for minutes after. ** [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exploding_head_syndrome Exploding head syndrome?]] * As a child [[DeVos This Troper]] visited an aquarium where you could walk though a plexi-glass tunnel under the water, ''[[EverythingIsEvenWorseWithSharks through the shark tank]]'', and although it could never happen in real life that experience combined with the BBC's ''WalkingWithDinosaurs'' means I ''still'' have dreams of being in one of those with ''[[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liopleurodon Fricking Liopleurodons!]]''. In the dream, the tube is always about thirty meters under water and I have to walk right the way though to the other side to escape. And I am always ''exactly'' half way through when I notice the first crack... Heck! In some of them, and I blame ''{{Myst}} II'' for this one, the tube is a force field generated by Steampunk technology. Its all fine, until I'm exactly half way and look back and see a fin pass throught the tube and go right through. It only holds back the ''water''. ** This troper saw WWD as a little kid and was traumatized for... I have no idea how long.

** HATE YOU. HATE HATE HATE. I'll never be able to walk through on of those again. ** ThisTroper wholeheartedly sympathizes with the troper above. In my hometown at the zoo there used to be a short boatride that took you through a dark tunnel filled with South American fishes...fine until I realized that one of the fish was somewhere in the neighborhood of a ton in weight and liked to swim RIGHT UP to the glass and stare at the boats. Creeeppppyyy. ** This troper will see your shark tunnel and raise you a HIPPO EXHIBIT where you can do the same thing, only the hippos keep ''gnawing on the glass'' to try to get at you... This troper has been Hippophobic since the age of eight because of this. *** [[ItGotWorse It gets worse:]] In this dream, the one with the force-field tunnel, there is always a deep see ledge beneath me, with a shipwreck teetering on the edge of the huge, dark abyss. Shipwrecks, just shipwrecks, creep me out. Theyre just so skeletal: and I'm an osteoarchaeologist by training, I LIKE skeletal. But for some reason the bones of ships have always scared me when the bones of men or bests could not. Its the noise from the steel ribs as it teeters on the brink: the dammed creaking noise... * this troper's bro had a dream when he was 10 or 11. when he had saved my mum hey had this toy robot (which for some reason i picure it as R.O.B a NES tool even thoe it wasn't in the dream)while he was trying to go to sleep he hear's a noice he look the robot had red eyes and was walking towards him saying "your mum was surpose to die,now you will die" * I had this one sort of daydream once. People say the world will end in 2012. 2012 is also when the Presidential term ends. The thought was that, what if Obama had planted a wired system of bombs all through the underground of the country? And when his term ended... BOOOOOOOM...? And, yeah, the end. For America, anyway. ** If it helps, his term ends in 2013. Or possibly 2017; you never know. * [[{{Katana}} This troper]] was watching FoolyCooly before bed. All night, I had insane dreams and kept waking up every 30 minutes or so. These nightmares were bad enough to leave me physically ill the next day. * This troper had an epiphany moment when I realised that since I couldn't feel pain in a dream, dreams couldn't hurt me and nightmares need no longer threaten me. A few nights later, I had a dream where someone was about to break all my fingers. He never got around to it, so no pain, but the worst crippling, paralysing terror I have ever experienced (including in real life). The only time I've ever been scared to go back to sleep. * This Troper tends to dream frequently, and fairly realistically. To the extent where she can have trouble sorting out which events actually happened, and which came from old dreams. This will range from simple stuff-- like thinking a friend moved away, or adding incorrect details to her childhood-- to absolutely terrifying-- a very vivid memory of being drowned in a lake as a child by some unknown adult. By all accounts, these things never happened, ''but why do I remember them so clearly?'' (The idea of an unreliable memory is

nightmarish enough. You have these thoughts, in your head, and you have no idea where they came from, or if they are even true...) ** I have the same problem, always thought I was the only one! I often get mixed-up as to what was a dream, a daydream, or a real memory. I wonder if we're crazy? *** I hope not, I have that too! **** Count me in! ... although it was only one [[FakeMemories Fake Memory (?)]], but I will undoubtely get new ones later on. The one that I've already gotten is my dad punishing me by spanking. It might not count as terrible for you, but he's one of those people who never use violence... on the other hand, [[KnifeNut I]] [[ICallItVera sometimes]] [[NightmareFetishist doubt]] [[NightmareFuelStationAttendant my sanity]], so we might all be crazy... * [[{{PunxsatownyPhil}} This troper]] had a dream a few years ago where God told him he was going to die in three days. Obviously, he was very worried for the next few days. Wasn't much more careful than he usually was, because he was worried that he was going to drop dead. Then again, after he [[CaptainObvious didn't die]], he began to wonder if it was God's timescale and it meant he'd die in 6 billion years. * I was not scared by any aspect of PathwaysIntoDarkness, but I ''did'' have a horrifying nightmare in which I (attempted) to play a sequel of it. In the dream, [=PID2=] was highly realistic, and started with the player in a helicopter outside the pyramid. I went down the ladder, stepped into the pyramid, and immediately two giant hands started climbing at me. I ran out of the pyramid, climbed the ladder, returned to the helicopter, quit the game, sold the CD and ''[[OverlyLongGag then]]'' woke up. * When I was 5-6 years old,I had nightmares. A LOT of nightmares. So I decided that I just wouldn't sleep any more. I still remember laying in bed staring at my night light, closing my eyes every few seconds, then forcing myself to open them. I was extremely scared of falling asleep without knowing it. That was the worst. Especially when I started having dreams that I was AWAKE and in bed and then the bed would suddenly fall through the floor. Eventually, I gave up this habit. The memories still haunt me however. * [[@/BonsaiForest This troper]] was scared of the flashing Medusa head boss in the original {{Castlevania}}. He had many nightmares of it and was afraid of seeing it show up in front of his bed in his room. He even had a dream where that head was hiding under the table, and he could only fight back by taking his dinner plate, peas included (this feature in particular sticking out in the dream), and shoving it in the Medusa head's face. * [[MaddeningDarkness This Troper]] loved to play the game Animal Crossing for gamecube all the time when she was little. It's an innocent little game that's fun and easy to play. I stopped playing after I beat though, it and one night I dreamed that I was inside the game. I went into one of the houses and was transported into another dimension or something. That wasn't the scary part though; their cute anime eyes were replaced with empty sockets, and they followed me around, just trailing me, whispering "you abandoned us"...

** This Troper (Icalasari (for some reason, the page link template does not work with my username)) has seen those faces. Made me stop playing for a few days, terrified ** I had an Animal Crossing dream in which I was running around, and spontanously all the animals around me fell to the ground, the leaves fell off the trees, and the grass turned brown. ''All in about a second.'' I ran up to one of the fallen animals (it was Walker the dog, who was in my town at the time) and tried to talk to him, but his face was frozen in a "shock" expression and he just said ".... .... ...." Cue a Game Over screen and a refusal to play the game for some time afterwards. My hands are shaking right now, actually... * Closed, unlocked doors. Stems from a weird dream involving an animated Jackie Chan. Ended with me opening a bathroom door only for a werewolf to burst in and devour him in a few seconds. Oddly, I am now a furry and voreaphile, so I guess I am also a NightmareFetishist... ** TMI. * This troper recently had a two part dream that made her glad it wasn't real. One part had it where everyone I knew was slowly being converted into pod people like in the Invasion of the Body Snatchers. The thought of having the people you love turned into emotionless drones and no one around to believe you was only offset by the second part of her dream, where I watch a car holding my grandmother (who died a few years ago) jump off a two-story parking lot and crash into the ground. When I tried to look inside, I was instantly aware (though I never saw it), that grandma's head was no longer there. She had been decapitated. ** This troper doesn't have nightmares often, or even remember dreams for more than a few minutes most of the time. That said, I once had a nightmare where I was apparently some sort of forensic detective, investigating a possible murder in a train yard. Upon inspecting the body, I found a binder in his backpack. This binder was in my own backpack in real life at that moment. This apparently signaled that this man was my father, and I had only not yet realized this because ''he, too, had been decapitated.'' I saw everything though. This was the only dream from which I have ever woken up crying. - Yamoryu *** Made worse by the fact that he died 3 years later, though under no similar circumstances. * [[@/{{T-Jack}} I]] have once dreamt about a (completely fictional) arcade game BossFight against a spider that was slowly inflating. Eventually, it filled the whole arena and ended the game. The spider itself was only mildly creepy, but the dream itself helped me realize something: I am truly scared of {{Game Over}}s. * This Troper was terrified by this creepy-looking carving of an apple with a happy face on it which his great aunt used to have hanging over her kitchen door. I think she eventually removed it, but my childhood was forever tainted. The Mott's Apple Juice commercial from circa 1975 with the singing apples ("The finest apples in Apple Land make Mott's Apple Juice taste grand!") was a source of nightmares. In it, I'd be riding in the car with my family to a street behind our housing tract, where in real life there were no streets, to a drive-through refreshment stand with a mural consisting of nothing but various fruits (apples, oranges, pears, etc.) with human faces. They'd come to

life and leap out at me. This was the only recurring dream I ever had, and would force myself awake any time I saw that * ^(&$# refreshment stand! * I'm not so sure this belongs in here, but once I had a nice dream about my dear grandmother. She was living in a beautiful house, and seemed really happy. Here's where the scary part comes in. The next day, when I came home from school, mom was on the couch, crying. I asked her what was wrong and she said that my grandmother had passed away. * When this troper was a young child, they used to experience one recurring nightmare. Around the age of four or five, she had her own bedroom. Every night when I went to bed, I would eventually witness my window flash with an orange light and this ENORMOUS FLOATING, TRANSPARENT SKULL would materialise in front of me. It had a circle of smaller skulls twirling around it constantly... and it would talk to me. It wasn't particularly mean or malevolent, it just talked to me and tried to make pleasant conversation. It even asked me politely to please NOT BE AFRAID of it and that it didn't mean any harm. This dream was so realistic that this troper genuinely assumed that she didn't sleep at night and spent the entire twelve hours watching this giant floating skull chat with me. It certainly didn't help when my own mother, in response to hearing about this dream, told me that the previous inhabitant of that room died of cancer at an early age. The dream stopped when I moved rooms, but there have been some dreams where it reappears and tells me that I can't escape it. ** Thanks to it, this troper has been terrified of ghosts for life. * This one had several nightmares at her granddad's creaky old house. The worst was when I was sleeping in the living room on a sofa bed and I dreamt that there was the silhouette of a freaky, scarecrow-like ''thing'' with a pumpkin head creeping towards the back door... And I found them scary at the time, but a couple of times I dreamt that I got abducted by [[FlashGordon Flash Gordon-esque]] bad guys in a spaceship while I was playing out in the garden. * This troper once dreamed that there was a corpse somewhere in his house, and he was trying to find it before the police came and presumed that he had killed its previous owner. The smell got worse and worse as he got closer to finding it, until he finally did find it - under his bed. At which point he woke up. And for many long, LONG, terrifying moments of perfect wakefulness, ''he could still smell it''. ** This troper has a similar experience with a dream involving one or more of her teeth falling out. Even after she wakes up, she can still feel the gap between her remaining teeth with her tongue. It takes her several minutes to convince herself that all her teeth are, in fact, present and accounted for. * This troper has long surreal dreams that usally are forgoten by mid afternoon but their are some nightmarish ones that stuck with her, one involed her eyeballs beings ripped out of her sockets with a drill at the doctors office, another one involed a bunch of creepy people trying to live in her grandma's house, one where she and her family turned into ugly werewolves, one where her soul and her body was seprated for an nightmarish operation, and the scariest one involed a

evil canivirous pink teddy bear that puts Lotso to shame. * This troper recently had a dream that I was on a school bus with a huge group of people, including my ex-boyfriend. Everyone on it started getting really rowdy, and eventually the bus tipped over. No one was hurt, so we all got out. We were in this strange, desolate little town, surrounded by abandoned stores. My ex-boyfriend suggested we all split up to go look for help, and I went off with him. We stopped at one store that looks deserted, but the front door is open, so we go inside. It's incredibly tiny, like the inside of a broom closet, and dark and dusty, but there's an opening leading into another room that looks fully lit. I, however, got freaked out, and told him we're leaving. We went back outside, and started walking toward the next store, which was really more like a stall, and full of dingy, dusty clothes. We looked over to an open door, and saw this guy with a cat head working at an old-fashioned sewing machine. I asked him if he can help us, but he just looked at me, meowed in a weird way (like a human trying to meow), and ''elongated'' his neck past the both of us. I shivered so hard that I woke myself up. I didn't fall back asleep for about thirty minutes because that freaking cat-man bothered me so much. * Now this is a weird one, I had a dream where I was shopping, fine enough, but then, a FREAKING CAN OF TOMATOES attacked me, with a demonic face to boot. Then it got MAD. It knocked me uncounscious, and could here it snarling. My eyes opened (In the dream)and it got its teeth and bit me. I woke up, and actually FELT the pain physically. Cue me going "Oh my god oh my god WHAT HAPPENED?" That day, I got knocked out by a [[{{Brick joke}} TOMATO CAN]]. * When [[{{Caenime}} this Troper]] was about 10 years old, she had a dream one night about it snowing outside her house. Since it rarely snows where we live (we're talking once or twice a DECADE here), my sister and I got excited and ran outside. we played in the snow and had a snowball fight, your usual snow stuff. But then something weird happened. Suddenly, my sister and I stared coughing, with a {{Scare Chord}} in the back. As time went on, it only got worse and worse, to the point where we could barely talk or breathe. I'm not entirely sure what happened to my sister, but I was collapsed in the snow, wheezing, and everything started to go black. Then, complete darkness. When I woke up, I had NO idea what happened in the dream. Years later, I started to get it. It wasn't snow; it was volcanic ash. And we don't live anywhere near any volcanoes, which baffled me even more. But later, it finally hit me. My dream was about [[{{End Of The World As We Know It}} the end of the world]]. * Almost ''all'' of this Tropers dreams are this way. This troper has been shot, stabbed, beaten to death, skinned alive, devoured alive, set on fire, locked in an Auschwitz gas chamber, raped, tortured on a rack (which has given me a fear of manacles - ironic, considering I like bondage. Just not with anything weighted ''and'' made of metal. Ever. This particular dream was quite traumatic, especially when you stop and realize that I woke up with my back covered in slowly oozing stripes and my face was badly bruised - I was struck across the face with a riding crop when I refused to answer questions. I may be a masochist, but this dream was not arousing ''at all''... *shudders*),

stoned to death, drowned, and murdered. She usually wakes up, not screaming, but shaking and checking herself for physical wounds because the pain she felt in the dream ''is still there'' and it feels like there should be blood spurting from some place in her body, or intestines spilled all around. One of my dreams involved a depraved axe murder and small children. I did not sleep for ''days'' after that. I've also been locked in a basement (in a dream) and been raped for the hell of it whilst being whipped and told I was going to undergo an abortion (don't ask why, I don't know)...''without anesthetic''. * Has anyone else had that dream where all your teeth rot out of your face? ** Oh my God. All the bloody time. At least twice a month for a few years now. I thought it was just me until I read somewhere that it meant you were ashamed of what was coming out of your mouth. In my case they started about the time that I began trying to break the habit of cussing. * Worst dream I ever had: I was going to Starbucks. I was inside the building, when all of a sudden, an armed madman appears outside. He shoots and kills two of the people on the sidewalk, and then a little girl standing next to me cries "That was my mother!" after a woman falls to the ground outside. The cashier hides us all behind the counter and locks the doors, the killer continueing to shoot people. Finally, the police show up, but the man gets away, escaping into the woods. But oh, ItGetsWorse. I go home, and walk into the door to find my father (who is a very confident, clean cut man, so this image was even more chilling) holding a handgun to his head, covered in bloody scratches. I go back outside, only to see the gunman walking up from the woods outside my house. I try to run inside, but he is faster, and slips into the door before I can close it. My father sits in the living room right by our kitchen, doing nothing, as I am curled up on the floor there, sobbing. The gunman points his rifle at me and...I wake up. I remember this dream vividly, only because it freaked the ever living daylights out of me. * Okay, so. Troper, in her dream, is a young woman who works at an art museum. She is working a night shift and goes out to get coffee. On the way, Troper sees a very menacing-looking woman watching her. Creepy, okay, but whatever. There are creepy people out there. Troper goes back to the museum and locks the doors behind her. She sets down her purse and turns back to the doors--to see an enormous, black, disgusting monster galloping toward the (glass) doors. Before she can move, it has crashed into the doors and is trying to get in. It tears one door off its hinges and pounces on Troper, crushing her to the point where she can't scream. It lets up the tiniest bit and Troper manages to get away, only to find the woman from earlier grabbing her in a chokehold and saying, "I can't imagine being you right now. I would hate to be ''tortured and killed.'' " Then I woke up, turned on the light in my room, and listened to Here Comes the Sun about a thousand times on repeat before closing my eyes again. * I had this dream once where me and a group of people went to a hotel. We get to our room and there's a bloody body in there. Then the floor infront of use turns to spikes and the door closes shut.. It

comes swinging at everyone but me. First off they cut off their legs and they fall face first into the spikes and their heads get split in half. I'm the only one alive and in the middle of the floor someone pops up and says "Your time has come." He takes out a saw, and I desperatly try to open the door open. The spikes disapear as he walks toward me. I try to kick him but he cuts off BOTH of my legs. As I lay there he slices my arms off. Just before he gets my head I wake with a start, and I was sweating like hell. * This Troper still gets tense when she thinks of a dream she had a couple of years ago: She was driving to visit a family member in another state, when she got lost, and had to pull over in a small town on the side of the highway. She got out of the car, and realized that the place was deserted. Suddenly, a young boy, with dirt all over his face walked past her, turned around, and said, "The funeral service is almost over." He started walking backwards, all the way to the door of a looming, and very obviously abandoned building. He then said, "I'll see you tomorrow." and closed the door behind him. Cue abrupt wakeup. *shivers* The creepy thing is, this troper has a nagging feeling that she knows the guy in her dream... somehow. ** And it definitely doesn't help that she just saw SilentHill today, and realized that that's the vibe the town had. * I've feared 2 images. One was when i was Very young, a Rugrats VHS had a picture of Chucky with frizzy hair that scared me as much as seeing Cthulhu would. Later in life i was irrationally afraid of the picture on the Goosebumps book Creature Teacher. I hid the book in a closet for years, and feared cleaning my room because I may have to clean our messy closet. One of the few dreams I remember was filled with the THREAT of seeing the book. Yes, the picture scared me so bad that one of my scariest dreams was about worrying about seeing it. * This Troper has a series of recurring dreams from when she was very, very young until present day (she is eighteen) that update themselves from events within her life, and it takes the form of a town. There are three parts of the town, the new part - based on fairly resent life events, the old part - based on the past, and the haunted part. The haunted part contains a hotel that, whenever this troper 'visits', is normally overrun by zombies should you enter the Tower or the Red Bedroom (both locations in said hotel). It also houses the house which is identical to the house where she lived with her abusive stepfather in real life, which, when entered, often triggers a Silent Hill style siren which signals ghosts, which is only eerie when you consider that this has been going on since well before Silent Hill. However, none of this scares her particularly. What really scares her is that sometimes, when she dreams about it, it seems more real than her day to day life, and she can draw reliable sketches and maps of this town when she can barely remember to get lunch at 1pm in real life. * There's something in our house. It's terrifying and we don't know where it is or what it is, we just know we have to hide. My younger brother is crying his eyes out because he's so frightened, and we can't find my younger sister. We hide under the bed, I'm stroking his hair and telling him it will all be alright. The thing is in our room. We stop breathing, we try to be as silent as we possibly can. My eyes are screwed tight but I can still see it, and it's an

EldritchAbomination from god knows where. It finds us, my brother is still sobbing. Then we're eaten and I jolt awake with tears running down my face. It was the most terrifying dream [[Tropers/LurkingBeneath this troper]] has ever had, mainly from the fear of my family being killed. * [[@/PulpoOscuro I]] once had a dream where I was in RedDeadRedemption as myself. Blah, not so creepy. I was talking to Marston, and then suddenly Marston's voice changed. I looked at Marston's face, and it was bone-white, starved, and skeletal, with [[RedEyesTakeWarning huge red orbs for eyes]] and absolutely no expression. Marston [[CallASmeerpARabbit (can I really call him that anymore?)]] said something to the effect of "Come with me...it is your only hope to escape..." Thoroughly freaked out, I turned around, and...''[[YouCannotGraspTheTrueForm something]]'' attacked me. Just to fuck with me a bit more, the dream suddenly gave me a Beretta pistol, which I immediately [[FiveRoundsRapid emptied at the]]...thing. ''It didn't do shit''. Then I woke up, sweating and filled with adrenaline. And the creepiest part is, ''[[NothingIsScarier I can't remember what attacked me]].'' No, actually, that's wrong. The creepiest fucking part is that that hideous abomination that Marston turned into was trying to warn me. Yeah, he was trying to ''warn me'' about that EldritchAbomination...and so whatever it was, it was horrific enough that another abomination terrifying enough to be an [[SCPFoundation SCP]] was afraid of it. Lucky I woke up. * You do remember the [[EvilTwin SA-X]] from {{Metroid Fusion}}, right? [[SarcasmMode Super Happy Fun-Times]], especially when you play the game the first time, not knowing when that thing pops up. [[Tropers/Jaryl I]] had several dreams about it, with me being in Samus' Fusion Suit, slowly walking in a seemingly quiet hallway. Then an explosion occured, with the SA-X standing at the other end of the Hallway, with me being unable to move. The next thing was an Ice Beam, followed by a Super Missile to the face, and me waking up in deep horror. Thinking back to this now, it doesn't seem that bad, but these days I couldn't sleep anymore. * This troper once had a dream of a cute old couple on vacation in Egypt. They were touring in a tomb of an ancient pyramid when the old lady realized that the souls of the statues in the tomb were being forever tortured. She was followed back to the hotel by one of the torturers and in the middle of the night she was dragged away. When her husband went to look for her he ended up in the tomb again and saw the statue of his wife with her a look of intense fear and pain forever on her face. Not to mention that this troper, the viewer, could hear the tortured screams of hundreds of people. That look of pain and fear still tortures me to this day. * [[{{osakachan12}} This troper]] once had a terrible nightmare. It had a girl standing in the middle of ruins, who looked suspiciously like [[{{Vocaloid}} Miku Hatsune.]] She was under 13, and dressed in a bloodstained dress. Her entire town (which was underground, by the way) was wiped out by this strange disease that had to do with insects, tentacles, and other gory details which I won't mention for your sanity and scare me to this day. '''MORE GORY DETAILS''': [[spoiler: All of a sudden, she was struck by the illness and a

tentacle burst out of her side, spraying blood, slime, and other stuff everywhere. Cockroaches came out of her mouth, and maggots began to eat at her flesh on her wrists. She collapsed to the ground, and an ominous musicbox-esque like song began to play in the background.]] [[SarcasmMode Wonderful dreams.]] * [[{{Dinosaurfan1}} I]] had this dream about a huge polluted pond just suddenly appearing in the school field. There's a guy on a boat in the pond and warns us to not go in it. After that an electrical charge happened in the back of the pond. I knew we shouldn't go swimming in it because it was dirty, but I was wondering was where the electrical charge came from. All of a sudden a person jumps into the pond. I see a HUGE stingray (I mean like a 50ft one [I was really into Godzilla when this dream happened.]) And it stings the person through the heart and kills him. Oh the irony, because one day after this dream, Steve Irin got killed from a stingray's barb going through his heart. * This troper has a weird relationship with this particular nightmare because thinking about the content amuses him to no end but remembering the actual dream still scares him. My parents have never been too religious, so one day when I had to sleep over at my grandmother's house ( was about 5 years old at the time) I was confused when she did the symbol of the holy cross on me (In the name of the father, the son and the holy spirit) because I never heard of it before. That very same night I had a dream that took place in the very same room I was sleeping in which a small trapdoor opened in a wall and from it came what appeared to be the Doorknob from Disney's AliceInWonderland, but it was looking at me very angrily, and then I go hold on to my grandma, who is next to me and tell her "It's the Holy Spirit! Protect me!" I always laugh when I remember that line but when I remember the creature staring at me I get a chill. * This recurring dream I have is super basic but always has me waking up in a cold sweat (that sounds so cheesy, but it's true) every night I have it - I'm just laying in my bed with the sheets over me, but there are bug crawling all over me and in every orifice (think, EVERY orifice,) and I'm trying to scream but they're filling up my entire throat so I sound like I'm gargling and crunching them inside me. The bugs vary from being cockroaches, maggots, big ants, crickets, those big black wasp/hornet things, or millipedes. Nothing leading up to all this, nothing after, just a few seconds of feeling them all over me and then I wake up. Anybody else ever have this?? * Warning: You could be offended by this, if you are a (catholic) religious person. But the following is not how I actually think about religion/church/christianity/Virging Mary. This was just a bizarre, horrifying nightmare I had and it helps me talking about it. ** In this dream my mum and dad had an argument. Apparently about whether I should go to church today or not. My dad said that we haven`t been there for so long, but my mum said something cryptic like: "Does it have to be today? Maybe Tuesday or next week..." (in our church there is liturgy of the word every tuesday evening as well as "real" mass on sunday.) Then there was a cut and the next thing happening was dad and me sitting down in church (so apparently he won

the argument). Then the priest and the ministrants came in and service began. It was like always (The dream "skimmed" over this part) but then during sermon the sculpture of Virging Mary with baby Jesus started moving and her face deformed in the most grotesque manner. Her eyes looked like a demon`s and she revealed sharp long teeth. I screamed and hugged my father asking whats happening and he said, that today was "Grimace Day" an obscure holiday which was not celebrated anymore, except for some parts of Bavaria. (Yeah, I know this part is bullshit and seems quite ridiculous, but it was a dream, so I believed him.) All the others in church didn`t seem bothered by the horrific, now loudly screaming statue. I recall that I envied the ministrants, who couldn`t see what was happening. I tried to settle myself and look as calm as everyone else, but then Mary ''[[CrossingTheLineTwice bit Baby Jesus` head off]]''. That was the point when my father decided to leave with me. But when we got out and ran away, we heard the door open and turned around. Out came the statue, now fully transformed into a monster, with the headless, bleeding Baby Jesus on her arm and the rest of the people, who attended church, looking like brainless zombies. The monster pointed at me and my father and the zombies started walking towards us. Somehow I knew that this was the punishment for leaving early and that she would bite my head off, too. That was the point when I woke up screaming. * This troper had a dream a couple years ago where he was living in a bombed out city in WWII, and his job was to euthanize the pets left behind by the evacuees. The true horror of the dream didn't impact him until he woke up. * Although not as terrifying as some of the other examples listed here, this troper used to have a reoccurring dream when she was 3-4 years old. She would get pulled into her TV by a static looking creature against her will, and would scream for help as she is dragged inside. She would then pound on the screen, begging for her parents to get her out with tears streaming down her face. Sometimes, her grandmother would be sitting nearby as it happened, but she would do absolutely nothing to help this troper. She would just sit there as if nothing was happening. Even now, she can still recall the dream detail for detail. * This troper once dreamt that her father tied her down, gouged open her stomach with a knife and tried to force her to eat her own intestines... Needless to say she was crying and perilously close to throwing up when she woke up. * [[{{@/arabbitfillednightmare}} This troper]] has recurring dreams about walking around her father's house and finding one of her friends or family members standing in her room facing away from her. Every time, for no reason in particular, she would tap on their shoulder to ask them if they were okay, and they would turn around to reveal a pale, [[{{eyescream}} eyeless]] figure without limbs. She would then notice that the figure was floating in mid-air before the two of them were suddenly in an open field, accompanied only by a dead tree and a swingset, which would rock back and forth as ominous windchimes played in the distance. * Last night, I had the most screwed up dream ever, which was related

to {{Arthur}} of all shows! All the characters from the show were at this party at the side of the road. Francine, for some reason or another [[spoiler: pushed The Brain into the road where he was hit by a two cars]]! There were lots of people their, so it was hard to tell who did it, it could have even been an accident. However, D.W saw the whole thing, she sent a message to Francine to meet her on the roof of the school, [[spoiler: where she killed Francine with a saw to the neck]]! When I woke up, I realized that this whole thing [[SchoolDays sounded very familiar. Very much like a certain Anime and Visual Novel]]. * A recurring dream of mine when I was young (and one time recently) was that I would be watching Rugrats and the end credits would come on. Note that I am VERY scared of the 1998 Klasky-Csupo logo from said show. The end credits would keep rolling, and I couldn't turn off the TV. (it was a tape, BTW, not on TV) I would wake up sweating right when the logo would show up. I blame my fear of the logo on seeing [[TheRugratsMovie the movie]] when I was 2 and getting full view of the logo. * I can't remember any of mine right now, but I specifically remember my younger brother had a dream that our sister's [[LooneyTunes Tweety Bird]] poster turned demonic, complete with [[NightmareFace Nightmare Face]] chanting "I know your name! I know your name!" in a satanic voice. The catch was that if it knew your name, you would die. * As a child, I had a dream that I found a picture on my computer named "thetruth.bmp" (I wasn't aware of compressed formats back then). It was a photo of my mother's corpse on her bed, eyes wide open and mouth agape, after she had been gruesomely murdered; I got alarmed and rushed to my mother's room to find her killed in the exact same fashion. The whole dream was disturbingly realistic, and it still gives me the creeps when I remember it. * I very rarely have nightmares, and even when something that should be terrifying happens in my dreams I rarely wake up frightened (even when I dreamed I was raped or that I was a serial killer). However, I have had two dreams that have set my heart pounding: The first occured when I was probably 6 or 7. I was swimming in the ocean with my family, including my younger sister, who was using my float (it was a penguin-shaped inflatable chair for toddlers). I wanted it back, so I stole it from her. She drowned as a result. I cried when I woke up. ** The second dream happened when I was about 15. I was at a family reunion in the dream when I was approached by a chihuahua named Trevor. I picked him up, only to discover that his eyes were lit up like flashlights. He tried to bite me, so I threw him across the room. I was terrified he would come back. It sounds stupid, but even when I remember it now, my heart is pounding. Perhaps the scariest thing was that I would throw a living animal against a wall... * I've forgotten most of my nightmares. In fact, I only remember a few vague details from this one, but I remember that it scared me a lot. In the dream, there was this guy that looked like the kid from Everwood. Although I "was" him for parts of the dream (sometimes I was just watching him), he was definitely a bad guy. At some point in the dream, he used something like a nail gun to attack members of a marching band. At the very end of the dream, this device was used on

him. The last thing I saw before waking up was him throwing his head back and screaming. All the veins in his face were dark red, and I could see the nail (or something) in his sinus. [[/folder]] [[folder:Fanart]] * This Troper was once looking through Yangire pictures as usual, and then she noticed ''that'' thumbnail. Not really sure what a ToyStory picture was doing among her Yangire, she clicked... to see that Woody was sitting on a sofa with a smile, and there was also ''a disembodied hand beneath a pillow''. Wonder why every other Yandere picture just induced a happy face... [[http://www.lolibaka.com/beta/post/show/84503 here]][[SchmuckBait 's the link if you're interested]]. [[/folder]] [[folder:Film - Animation]] * Disney's Aladdin is one of my favorite movies, and does not scare me at all. However, I've had a total of THREE Nightmare incidents related to that movie. First of all, when I was a kid, I couldn't watch the Cave of Wonders. Was it the CGI? The deep voice? (Chernabog and the monsters in Hercules NEVER had the same effect.) When I was a slightly older kid, I had a nightmare about Disney characters who had mutated, and the last picture I remember in my head is Jasmine in her purple gown with bugging eyes and fangs that protruded past her chin. Finally, as a middle schooler, I would not go into the dark basement because I thought snake!Jafar was waiting down there to gobble me up. Now absolutely nothing about Aladdin scares me...I love Jasmine and Jafar...NOW the problem is that I can't walk to my bed in the dark 'cause of that gosh dang Slenderman. CURSE YOUUUUUUUU VICTOR SURRRRRRRRGE!!!!! * [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_DDiwj3Ji4 This]] video made by the fellows over at [[http://www.onemoreproduction.com/ One More Production]] is ''meant'' to be cute and funny, but got to this troper's mind once the taxi disentigrated into cubes. Soon after, Pac Man eats the exits to the city's subway system, [[spoiler: trapping everyone underground]]. And finally, tetris blocks make ''entire floors of buildings disappear. OUT OF THIN AIR.'' [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FateWorseThanDeath Oh, where those souls may have gone...]] * This troper's Nightmare Fuel was the Night on Bald Mountain segment of Fantasia. I could never watch that part as a child, and it scared me so much that, when listening to the Fantasia soundtrack, I couldn't listen to the music itself! Now, I'd probably like the music and that segment, but man, back then... brr... * The Brave Little Toaster is this for me. SO. VERY. MUCH. The "Worthless" song was bad enough, but "B Movie Show", the part with all the broken appliances in the back of the repair shop, OHDEARGODNOOOOOOOO!!!!! Especially the fan, KILL IT NOW!!!! ** This troper was only mildly freaked out by "Worthless" as a kid ([[FridgeHorror the connotations didn't come until much later]]), and absolutely loved "B-Movie Show". What really got to me? That freaking nightmare the toaster has. The first time I watched this movie and

that damn clown reared his hideous head, I slammed the eject button on my VCR, crammed the tape back in its case, and refused to watch it for at least a year. * This troper's brother heard she'd liked the the CITV series of Watership down, so he bought her the original. Only she didn't know the series was a cleaned up version, and that the movie was a lot more terror-enducing. So she sat down to watch it expecting cute little bunnies and a mouse with a funny accent, only to end up being tramatized and crying. The same thing happened with Animal Farm. Apparently I needed to learn [[WhatDoYouMeanItsNotForKids that not every cartoon with animals was intended for children. Twice.]] * This troper has some faint memories of a film he once saw on TV when he was a little kid. In one scene, a scientist who seemed nice, drank a potion and turned into a monster. This scene cause horrifying nightmares for months and a fear of nice people turning into monsters. I was always unsure if this was an actual memory or a memorable nightmare, but after seeing the [[NostalgiaCritic Nostalgia Critic's]] review on [[ThePagemaster The Pagemaster]] I suddenly realized "HOLY SHIT, THERE IT IS!". The scene is actually really rediculous, but if you're somewhere between 2 and 5 years old it can destroy your childhood. ** I concur. I actually really liked The Pagemaster when I was a kid because I recognised the characters from books I'd already read, including Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde, and I thought the whole sequence was pretty cool. That is, until Jekyll took the potion, and we see him from behind, all hunched over and panting. He slowly rasps, "My...name...is..." then he suddenly turns around, sticks his (hideous, bulgy-eyed, fanged) face in the camera and screams "MR. HYYYYYYYYYYYYDE!" in a demented voice. Scarred for life. * I was... um... afraid of King Triton from [[TheLittleMermaid The Little Mermaid]]. I have no idea why, but he was absolutely terrifying to me. This seems to amuse my friends. [[/folder]] [[folder:Film - Live Action]] * [[{{Dallenson}} this troper]] Watched {{The Blob}} 80's Remake, and After seeing the Guy get sucked down the Drain. He Was Scared (Read: Shit-lessly Terrified) to Get near the Bathrooms Shower Drain. * Jesus, I thought MysteryMen would be a nice AffectionateParody of other superhero films. And it is...until the ragtag team finds out where the big hero was being held prisoner. In their attempt to free him, they FUCKING KILLED HIM WITH THE REALITY-WARPING MACHINE! And while trying to check for a pulse, his hand crumbled...brr... * Pee Wee Herman. I can't watch the movie or even his TV show. Odd, since Lock is my favorite character in Nightmare Before Christmas. * Am [[Tropers/StrangerCoug I]] the only troper to whom {{Under Siege}} has given nightmares about microwaves blowing up? * This troper was afraid of the television in her room for a while after watching {{The Ring}} for the first time. It only made matters worse when said television started emitting a faint glow in the middle of the night--exactly SEVEN DAYS after watching that movie. Needless to say, this troper didn't get any sleep that night.

* This troper, will kill whoever did the Super Mario Bros Movie. WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO YOSHI!!? * Not myself, but after ''JurassicPark III'' came out, I jokingly told my friend's young cousin that there was a ''Spinosaurus'' in his grandmother's closet. To this day he still can't walk past it without someone being with him. I feel bad. * This troper watched Dante's Peak in Earth Science in 9th grade and rushed out of the room when [[spoiler: the grandma waded through the acidic lake to save the family and was screaming in pain]]. She could not return to the room to watch the end of the film and had nightmares for a very long time. How she managed to get to that point of the movie in the first place without freaking out is questionable especially when [[spoiler: the fiancee died in the very beginning of the film]] and later when [[spoiler: the couple boiled to death in the hot spring]]. In short, there were a lot of moments that freaked this troper out. To this day, this troper can not watch any part of the movie without freaking out. * This troper had tornado-related nightmares after watching Twister for a very long time. Luckily, she can now watch the entire movie without having nightmares. Unless it's the summer or there's a thunderstorm. * Hmmm...I guess this counts as Live Action TV. In the area where I live, the Emergency Broadcast System (This is only a test....) is accompanied by not only the typical buzzing noises but a weird, eerie noise you'd associate with flying saucers. ** Once, I accidentally left the emergency broadcast system alarm on, and its SUPER-LOUD siren jolted me awake in the middle of the night during a bad storm. I remained slightly freaked out during the time that it took me to fall asleep again. * The one scence that disturbed me the most the most when I was a kid is the Wampaa scence from The Empire Strikes Back. Oh sure, "Star Wars is the perfect family film!" George Lucas said, but that. is . WRONG! DO NOT show kids these movies unless you want to give the nightmares! * Although it didn't give this troper nightmares, one scene in {{Babe}} caused this troper to scream and cry in terror. Having recently graduated kindergarten, a pack of dogs assaulting innocent sheep, causing one to dramatically ''bleed to death on screen'' was the most violent and intense thing I had ever seen. To this day I object to its G rating. * [[StarWars Return of the Jedi is my favorite Star Wars movie]], but when I was little I used to get freaked out by Jabba the Hutt. I mean, really, Jabba the Hutt. He's fat, obnoxious, has a creepy voice/laugh, and feeds people to the rancor for fun. But the worst part is that he reminds me of my grandpa. Not the cool grandpa who died a few years ago, but the one who emotionally abused my dad from the time he was a baby, and [[Understatement is just not a nice person anyway]]. I'm not even lying, the mouth and the chin especially. [[UncannyValley He's creepy.]] * This troper used to be freaked out by the DreamSequence in DumbandDumber when Jim Carrey's character rips a chef's heart out. * The negative energy throughout CabinFever mentally destroyed an entire week.

* When he was younger, [[{{Tropers/Marr965}} this troper]] saw the ''Doctor Who'' film. He became utterly terrified of one particular round, black, about-his-height dustbin. * Those [[PersicsionFStrike FUCKING]] making-of videos on the Disney tapes. The first one I got scared of was TheManyAdventuresOfWinnieThePooh, due to the startup part. But that was only the begenning. Pinochio was even worse. It has a picture of a real-looking Jiminy Cricket with lots of cricket features, AND DISNEY ALMOST FUCKING APPROVED OF IT! And then there was The Jungle Book. It showed creepy pictures of desolate ruins, gnarled trees, and creepy music when they talked about the earlier treatment of the film. At the time, I had no idea that the movie was still somewhat light and humorous even at that phase of development. And those are nothing, GODDAMNED NOTHING comapred to Peter Pan! Man, that abomination was just, horrible. The artwork shown had SKELETONS LINING EVREY FREAKING WALL, TIGER LILLY ALMOST DROWING, A HYPER-REALISTIC CAPTAIN HOOK, AND AN ALMOST LOVECRAFT-LOOKING WARNING MESSAGE BY THE PIRATES!!! [[/folder]] [[folder:Literature]] * I watched Watership Down when I was five. Not a good idea. * After reading Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator, and seeing the picture of the Vermicious Knid, I used to have a terror of going to the bathroom at night, just in case there was a Knid hovering over the toilet. I am now able to laugh this fear, and it is mostly in the long-past tense. * I read the first two Harry Potter books when I was seven. First one was fine, but for some reason the basilisk in [=CoS=] scared me shitless. Add in hearing about the Bloody Mary legend, and I've hated mirrors ever since. Especially at night. It took three years before I could finish the book (the part where Ginny's taken SHOULD NOT be read at night), and I've never reread it. ** This Troper also started reading the Harry Potter books at about age 6 or 7. She loved the first three books, but was put off the series completely after reading the first chapter of book 4 (in which a random guy is killed by Voldemort). After reading it she put the book straight down and hasn't touched it in over 6 years (and still doesn't plan to). Funnily enough she was fine watching the same scene in the movie some years later. * The Boo Hag, aka "Old Hag". My dad's side of the family has Southern Black roots, and Dad had [[http://www.amazon.com/Stories-CorettaScott-AuthorWinner/dp/0590473700/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1288471882&sr=1-6 a book]] full of Southern folk tales, such as the Talking Eggs. One that he never let me read as a kid was the story about the [[EldritchAbomination Boo Hag]]. Should've listened. When Dad wasn't around, I went over to the book case, pulled out the book, and read the story. [[TooDumbToLive I]] [[OhCrap really should've listened]], since I was kept up ALL FUCKING NIGHT because of that story. What happens? Well, a girl is haunted every night by the Boo Hag, who comes into her room and rides her (like a witch rides a broom) through the air. The girl's mother figures it out and takes a jar, a cork stopper,

and either twelve or thirteen needles. One needle is put into the jar, the others go into the stopper. This stops the Hag since supposedly she's trapped inside the jar or something. But there's a catch. The charm only works while the girl's mother is alive. After the mother passes, the hag LIES IN WAIT FOR THE GIRL, WHO IS TOO SCARED TO LEAVE HER HOUSE BECAUSE OF THIS. I'm twenty, and if I read about the Hag online (since I decided to write a story based on this folk tale), or watch documentaries about the Hag on TV, without fail, I'll be kept up all night by it, complete with shutting my curtains and keeping the lights on. Brrr. * For This Troper, it's stories with a door or portal between dimensions that only opens every X years. The idea of getting stuck in the wrong world scared her. * This troper recalls reading a book aptly named "The Ankle Grabber" in primary school when rifling through her classrooms mini library section. It was about a disgusting creature that lives beneath kids beds and tries to grab their ankles when they're getting out of bed. It induced such paranoia fuel that I made sure not to put my feet too near the bottom of my bed whenever I got up in the morning or went to bed. I for one know that I'd never let any child of mine read that book of Nightmare Fuel. * Not sure if this goes here or under music, but this troper has a CD full of scary stories narrated by a man with a heavy Boston accent who called himself the Old Gray Goose. I found it in the children's section of a book store around Halloween one year. I've always been a die hard fan of scary stories, so I bought it, thinking it would be a fun listen. My mom and I popped it into her car CD player to listen to on the way home, and after a brief intro from the Old Gray Goose, we get to the first story. What is this story about? Two men who's boat scuttles on a rock, and they have to wait for help. One of the men, Cully, starts ''slowly losing his mind'', and begins talking about how people survive in these situations ''[[ImAHumanitarian by restoring to cannibalism.]]'' When the narrator falls asleep, Cully attacks him, but the narrator gets the upper hand and kills Cully. And how does this lovely story end? The narrator says, "Now, Cully is all gone. And I'm hungry again." I refuse to listen to that track ever again. [[WhatDoYouMeanItsForKids And I'm still trying to figure out what the bloody hell that CD was doing in the children's section...]] * After reading the bit of TheLittleMatchGirl where "the goose jumped down from the dish and waddled across the floor, with a knife and fork in its breast, to the little girl." (which is apparently a happy moment), I was scared for a fair few years of the living roast goose who patrolled my grandparents house at night (it was where I heard the story) with a knife and fork stuck in it's back, bent on revenge upon everyone because someone tried to eat it alive. * This troper vaguely remembers a book read to her in preschool called "Those Mean Nasty Dirty Downright Disgusting but...Invisible Germs." The pictures were realistic photos of a girl washing away these creepy cartoon germs that were going out of their way to make her sick. Every time my teacher read it I would burst into tears in fear that something was going to try to make me sick and kill me. To this day, I'm terrified just thinking about it... I am 22 years old.

* This Troper, after reading a Christmas-themed story by author Cornelia Funke (the title of which I cannot recall), obtained a relatively short-lived (two or three months' worth) fear of [[spoiler:rocking horses]]. ...Yeah. [[/folder]] [[folder:Live Action Television]] * Letterman creeps me out. He's just got that creepy old man vibe about him. And I've never read or seen the ''Dark Knight Returns'' comic. What happens exactly? ** He's interviewing ''The Joker''. [[TooDumbToLive Take a guess.]] * When this troper was 2 or 3, he was utterly terrified by the Sphynx Stare of the robotic protagonist in [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Giant_Robo_(tokusatsu) Johnny Sokko and his Flying Robot]]. He would run out of the living room in a state of absolute panic. It was [[http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FzgRPqhaeVI/SqLYgbhgOGI/AAAAAAAAAAc/BOSYvJ ZXIi0/s1600-h/robogigante-encara.jpg the eyes]]. * This Troper's favourite (incidentally Doctor Who-related) game counts as NightmareFuel (usually). One person (usually me) stands in the middle like one of the Weeping Angel things in ''Blink'' with their eyes covered, and everyone else stands in a circle around them, apart from one person, who walks around the outside of these people (''The Doctor''). They tap one person on the shoulder, then say, "OK". That person then walks in to the circle and, in a weird variant on the real show (I know, I know) they stand beside the ''Angel'': that person is now the Companion. Then, everyone closes their eyes and the Companion nudges the Angel, who then has to leave the circle. Then they tap someone on the shoulder, and ''The Doctor'' does the same to someone else (''The Angel'' and ''The Doctor'' have to catch each other's eye, and signal as to who their victim will be). Then, ''The Angel'' taps their Victim three times on the back, and they scream. All this time, ''The Doctor'' and ''The Angel'' have been conversing silently, so the Angel pushes their person in to the circle, and the previous Companion (to the Angel) leaves and stands in the other Companion's place. ''The Doctor'' now has two choices: sacrifice their current Companion to save this one, or leave them. And, if they choose to sacrifice their current Companion, that person becomes another Angel, and if not, the Angel turns their person to stone. So, the game carries on until everyone is either an Angel or Stone, so we usually start again. One of my friends got bad dreams from it when I was first Angel because apparently, I'm "''So damn scary!''" ** Anything written by Steven Moffat is scary for this tropette. "Mummy!" * When [[{{Yoyomom}} this troper]] saw the PowerRangers episode with The [[TheBlank face stealer]], I was too young to understand the dialog. I thought he put white stuff on peoples faces and floating pictures of those faces came out of him and where placed on the heads to have the white stuff removed. [[FridgeHorror After listening to the dialouge at the end, I realized what he REALLY did]]. The face stealer has haunted me ever since. * I don't know why, but for me, "Tales from the Darkside" gives me the

creeps. Sure, some episodes aren't THAT bad, but the "Geezenstacks" episode takes the friggen cake. The music score used, the premise of a demonic dollhouse, the ending... (shudders) It's also interesting to point out that ''I ONLY SAW IT ONCE (WITH SOUND) AND I STILL REMEMBER HOW IT PLAYED OUT.'' I'm not sure if somebody agrees with me that the show's scary... but it is to me. * The Weeping Angels. It was NOT a good idea to watch Time of Angels and City of Stone, back to back in the dead of night. Really not a good idea. This troper cannot walk by a cemetery without shivering now. ** The Waters of Mars. [[Tropers/EdgarLNight This Troper]] has mildly severe aquaphobia. Mild because she's not afraid of water in and of itself, but holy CRAP she is afraid of drowning. Cripplingly so. TWOM has, naturally, the concept that water can make you into a zombie, but one should note the fact that water is constantly spewing from every orifice in those creatures' bodies. They are drowning ''from the inside.'' [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel ...AGH.]] * ''The Record'', a politics program that used to be on Sunday afternoons in this British troper's childhood, had an opening sequence consisting of St. Stephen's Tower (the big spire that houses Big Ben, part of the Houses of Parliament) turning into a crocodile and crawling around to ominous music and then roaring. To this troper, she suspects it's her generation's "Daleks" -- it's the one thing on telly ever made her hide behind the sofa. * The 80's PBS and CTW logos didn't faze me, but the opening sequence for seasons 6 & 7 of ''ThreeTwoOneContact'' was rather traumatizing, especially the triangle/lightning-zap logo and its sounds, and several of the preview clips. * While the show itself never much impressed me, just the opening theme of [[AreYouAfraidOfTheDark Are You Afraid of The Dark?]] seriously heebied my jeebies. The shadowy blue lighting, the creepy vocals, shots of various scary locations like an abandoned playground or a dark attic, and most of all the empty rowboat slightly rocking like the occupant had just been snatched away...brrrrrrr. * Was watching [[Series/DoctorWho Day of the Moon]] on On Demand. The video's listed time is one hour. It ended forty minutes in. What if the remaining twenty minutes were pictures of Silents?! * This [[Tropers/{{Demetrios}} troper]] loves ''TheTwilightZone'', thanks to my mom who grew up with it. But no thanks to Accidental Nightmare Fuel, there are two episodes I'll never watch again: ** "And When The Sky Was Opened": That episode was, in my own words, sick and disturbing. Not only do the astronauts [[CessationOfExistence physically disappear]], but ''[[RetGone each and every bit of information about them is erased from the human race's memory]]''. And there's never an explanation as to ''why'' that happens. I guess the Universe just felt like being an [[PrecisionFStrike ass]] that day. ** "The Masks": Well, [[SomeAnvilsNeedToBeDropped it does have a good moral]], but I don't watch TV shows to have one of my favorite (and frankly underrated) pieces of clothing [[NightmareFace insulted]]. * This troper used to love the 1995 remake of the Outer Limits, until the "Flower Child" episode. The last few minutes of it - which I remember to this day - gave me nightmares.

** As well as the last ten of the Animatrix skit "The Second Renaissance." * One of this troper's very first memories came from when, at the tender age of almost three years old, I was watching an episode of ''Fame''--which would be the ''last'' episode I ever watched, so greatly did it terrify me. The reason? The episode included the [[TheWizardOfOz Wicked Witch of the West]], which at that time I referred to as "the green witch". Thinking she'd be in every episode from then on I refused to watch the show ever again ("Nooooo! I don't wanna see the green witch!") Strangely enough, as I got older I looked for the episode and asked people about it and NOBODY knew what I was talking about, so I thought it might have been a false memory... but more than twenty years after I'd originally seen it, I finally found out it was an episode called "Not In Kansas Anymore". Long story short(er), I finally got the chance to re-watch it on Hulu nearly thirty years after I'd originally seen it, and while the Witch didn't scare me ''quite'' as much as it did when I was two, I can see how it would have terrified me then. I really wish I could convey how much it scared me back then. * When this troper was a kid, a TV show on ABC titled {{ABC Weekend Specials}} had an opening sequence (from the 1980's) that freaked this troper out. To the point of closing my ears, crying, and running out of the living room. In 2007, while looking at openings to kid TV shows (one being {{CBS Storybreak}}), the side bar of suggestions revealed that the opening of the show was there. It paralyzed me with fear to the point of closing out of YouTube. My roommate, at the time, didn't understand the fear until I told her to look it up. She didn't have sound on her computer but she found the opening to be "freaky" and upon watching it again, she understood the reason for my fear. I can't even look up the teenage counterpart {{ABC After School Specials}} on YouTube without that opening appearing. Still haunts me to this day. [[/folder]] [[folder:Music]] * The first time this troper heard the song "Like a G6" he'd been reading the HighOctaneNightmareFuel page for FirstEncounterAssaultRecon and was just going to bed. That page is creepy enough. Then he heard this song, and he just got this...really bad feeling. Like there was this demonic creature creeping up behind him. The fact that there was no real musical accompaniment, just that creepy beat like pounding a soda bottle on your hand. FEAR was probably responsible for a lot of it, but hearing that guy whisper in that strangely creepy voice, "Popping bottles in the ice...''like a blizzard''..." just irrationally ''freaked him the fuck out''. He spent the entirety of that song sitting on his bed, cluching a massive book about fighter planes, ready to take ExtremeMeleeRevenge on anything, be it Alma, Satan, or some demonic zombie versions of the Far East movement, that so much as showed a strand of its hair near him. * Call her chicken, but this troper has a problem with "Bohemian Rhapsody" by Queen. The operatic-sounding part ("GALILEO! GALILEO!") never fails to be unsettling and compared to the rest of the song is

just...''out there.'' I'll sit through it when it comes on the radio, but I don't do it willingly. So imagine how I felt when [[{{Glee}} Vocal Adrenaline]] used it to [[spoiler:win Regionals...]] ** This troper has loved that song since she was little, every part included... until my dad explained the general premise once when I was, say, eight. While I still love it, the opera part gives her chills. In relation to your last sentence: I don't know if it was the lighting or the fact that it was montaged with [[spoiler:Quinn in labor]], but during that scene I was curled up on the couch and halfcovering her eyes. * This troper feels genuinely sick to his stomach when he hears music that sounds 'wrong'.. ** Like playing C and F-sharp on an organ, for example? Or like LyricalDissonance 'wrong'? ** YYMV: This Troper, as a composer, finds that the music that sounds "wrong" (which is completely different from music that sounds "bad") can convey more emotion and be more powerful than anything cookiecutter that follows all the rules and guidelines of chord theory or melody writing. *** This Troper understands the OP's plight. Though, my pain comes in headaches and aggravation. I sometimes avoid people that like to sing but can't. * This troper has always been strangely creeped out by ''lullabies''. It used to be worse- she's pretty much over it now, but when she was little so much as hearing the words "rock-a-bye baby" would scare her. Badly. Not at all helped by a mother who held it over her head and started singing lullabies if this troper was being annoying, even knowing how much they genuinely freaked her out. She still has NO idea where the fear came from. Perhaps it was the lyrics- "when the bough breaks the cradle will fall, and down wil come baby, cradle and all." *shudder* * Cannibalism freaks me out. Someone explained to me what the lyrics to "Mein Teil" by Rammstein meant. Today, I am the only German student I know who dislikes the band. ** But cannibalism is amazing! YMMV, I guess... * The growly faux-bluesman bit in Van Morrison's "Bright Side Of The Road." As a little kid, I actually used to ''run away from the stereo screaming in horror'' when my parents would play this, as the first track on his greatest hits CD. I called him "Van Monster" because of it, and to this day, 15+ years later, I really can't stand the sound of his voice. [[/folder]] [[folder:Toys]] * I live in Germany and here Furbies became popular a few months later than they did in America. So when my aunt gave one to me (it was the white one, I don`t know his name), she bought when she was on vacation in Canada, I wouldn`t know them. Naturally I was curious and wanted to try it immediately. It was a hot day and we were sitting on the terrace. I started playing with it and at first it was pretty fun, but soon it started to behave strangely and his voice became horrifying distorted. And it wouldn`t stop. Apparently the batteries ran to hot.

But I didn`t know that then... So I started crying and ran to my mother, shouting: "What is happening? Make it stop!" It took much to long to find the off-button. ** Well, that could be the end of the story. My aunt kept the furby at her place (because she thougt it was pretty cool if it wasn`t malfunctioning) and hid it, when I visited her. However a few weeks later furbies became the craze in Germany. So in every commercial break there would be a furby commercial, in every toy store there were tons of them. Well, at least these situations could be avoided. However, one day there was another "toy day" at the kindergarten (usually we weren`t allowed to bring our own toys, but on these days we were) and EVERYONE (well at least two thirds of the kids) brought their furbies! (No, my parents couldn`t pick me up earlier, they were both working.) So I had to spend half of the day surrounded by these little beasts, constantly afraid that one of them would get this terrible "illness", that turns them evil. * This troper had- no has- a toy that terrifies her. It's hard to describe, but it's a very tiny, very adorable bunny on wheels. When you turn it on, it plays music and starts moving and making a bunch of sounds. I hated it. Every time I put it on a ledge, it would start rolling towards me and then fall off. It sounds were really awful and annoying. I eventually buried the thing deep into my closet. But recently, while picking out a shirt, I heard the start up music and then a bunch of noises and the sound of something moving. I screamed. It must have been turned on by hitting something, and I realized in order to stop the terrible noises, I would have to turn it off myself. I fished it out from the clutter and spent 12 minutes in panic with tears at my eyes as I tried to figure out how to turn it off. I held the thing as far from me as possible. When I finally realized I had to hold the off switch, I remembered the creepiest part of the toy: when you turn it off, it plays this horrifying version of the opening tune, but it says Goodbye in a robotic voice and the music dies away in a creepy manner. When I turned it off, I threw it down and covered it with things. I told my mom that I wanted it thrown in the dump or broken into pieces or something, but she laughed it off. And its still in my closet. Turning on when it bumps into something and moving around in the night. I heard it roll into the closed closet door once and it made one of its freaky giggling sounds. ** I had these rock em sock em robots style Jurassic Park velociraptors that made noise. As their batteries started dying they would start up on their own. So sometimes I would wake up in the middle of the night to raptor screeching coming from my closet. * This troper is freaked out by the Lala Loopsie dolls. Why would she be scared by those things you ask? Well, they're dolls with [[{{Coraline}} black, button eyes]]. [[/folder]]

[[folder:Video Games]] * This troper's sister was four years older when she got a "computer" game with a bunch of educational games on it. Whenever you lost at one of the games, it would say (in a somewhat creepy monotone) "I win. You

lose." One day, the computer was messing up, and she lost a game. The computer said "I win. You lose. You lose. You lose." Then the screen blinked three times. Then the screen went black. She screamed. It still gives her nightmares to this day (almost ten years later). * This troper just got [[GarrysMod GMod]], and is always coming up with new ways to freak the shit out of his siblings as well as himself with it. Recently he took one of the abandoned houses in Half-Life 2 and dolled it up into a huge haunted house full of rusty hooks, skeletons hanging from nooses, a fireplace full of burning corpses, a bathtub full of blood, and a dentist's chair with a tortured human body on it. ** You have problems. TacoNinja likes you. * This Troper has infrequent nightmares about the final boss of Silent Hill 3. In the dreams, I am always aware of the "presence" of it, even if I do not "look" at it. Sometimes, Heather is there too. Once, I dreamt of one of the generic ResidentEvil zombie's faces turning into that of Silent Hill 3's final boss. These dreams only really kicked in three years after Silent Hill 3 came out. * This Troper had a dream about Left4Dead before she even started playing it. Strangely, it occured in the middle of a co-op playthrough of ResidentEvil5. I clearly remember the group being chased by the Executioner from that game, as they tried to reach a boat tied up at the dock. When they did get on the boat, a huge wave came in and I FELT it get flung to the top of a swell. * A little while ago, [[ARandomSerf this troper]] was reading a LetsPlay of SilentHill while listening to [[OminousLatinChanting the soundtrack]] of TheOmen. Okay, but I was expecting all of this. And then a CreepyChild suddenly started singing in the background. Gyah! It turned out to be something from what my parents were watching in the other room. ** Silent Hill has great timing, I was alternating between a walkthrough and videos when I decided I needed to take a leak. For whatever reason the Morning was INSANELY foggy, like a 2metre visibility (Which is more or less unheard of where I come from) And then, while looking out the window I hear an ominous siren, guess what it sounded like? Turns out it was the Volunteer Fire Fighters siren, But Damn it scared me. * If you are ever playing BlackAndWhite, do not built a wonder unless you are absolutely 100% sure you have enough wood and food to finish. There is nothing worse than watching your entire civilization crumble as hundreds of people desperately try to construct this impossible creation. And if they've got nothing better to do, they'll all join in. And you can't get them to stop. This troper tried destroying it to get the message across to stop building. All it did was slow them down and make them hate me. It's like a CosmicHorror fucking with the gods! ''AND IT'S A REALLY BIG BUILDING MADE OF WOOD.'' * Years ago, [[CRBWildcat this troper]] had an old computer board game called ''Redhook's Revenge''. The whole point of the game was to handle trivia questions and situations revolving around sailing, piracy, things of that nature. To start the game, you had to select one of five (three, if playing the shareware version) different pirates to play as; you had the choice of selecting extra characters

for the computer to control. Throughout the game, the pirates would react either positively or negatively, depending on the choices made. The faces made when something was done wrong absolutely ''frightened'' me; all five characters (except Poseidon the parrot) had this ''sneer'' for just such an occasion; the only one I haven't seen was Blackbeard's, and I don't even want to know what he looks like. I liked the game too much to let the faces scare me away permanently, though, so I usually just left a sock or rag hanging over the edge of the monitor so that I wouldn't have to look at them. Despite this, I have had at least one nightmare revolving around that game. * While this troper can handle the rest of Twilight Princess, one thing he can't take are those Shadow Beasts. The hulking, tendrilhaired monstrosities you have to kill in order to progress and open up portals for later teleportation use? Well, after getting across the Bridge of Eldin and witnessing the bridge's disappearance, he decided to mess around with those things with his new hawkeye/bow-and-arrow technology, just to pick 'em off. Bad idea. They found out and FUCKING chased after him! Who knew such beasts could see over a mile away?! That was unsettling! And yes, their shrieks to revive their fallen comrades also gets to him. ** This Troper had just finished beating this giant spider boss in Twilight Princess and watched as Link did his winning stance only for his face to go D: . Apparently ''the fricking spider's '''eye''' was still on a very small spider's body - possibly without a head''. The boys in her family are the ones who are scared of spiders in general, but... this turned the tables around for a short while! * This troper has never even played Majora's Mask before, and she has no intent to. By only WATCHING VIDEOS ON YOUTUBE of the little girl who's father is turning into a gibdo (who is kept in a CLOSET!), she can't even turn off all the lights in her house and go the short distance from the bathroom to her bedroom without thinking a gibdo is going to come out of the shower or the darkness to attack her. Permanent mental scarring? Definitely. ** This troper seconds this. It freaked me the hell out, I only kept playing because it's one of my favorite games. * While playing Majora's Mask one night, this troper had the game freeze during the cutscene where the Skull Kid makes his horrible screaming noise. She panicked and hid in the bathroom until her mother finally decided to shut the game off for her. ** Heck, the game doesn't even have to freeze. This troper will never forget that distorted scream, ever. * This troper had a horror with the Nintendo 64's Hey You, Pikachu. In the middle of playing the game, the Pikachu's FACE disappeared! It was replaced with red and black vertical lines on the top with a small black spot below. And when Pikachu moved, it went bee-beep bee-beep instead of pit pat... This troper was only around ten years old. Cue shutting off the game and running out of the room. ** This same troper once fired up Donkey Kong 64 to have the screen show no picture and random monkey sounds. Cue an even more scared young troper. Ah, the memories. * [[GreentheGunstar This troper]] started playing Earthbound when he was 13, being an enthusiast in RPG games. He made it halfway through

the game before he stopped playing for a few weeks. One day while attending a session of in-school suspension, he was browsing the internet on his school-provided laptop and decided to see what the [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel final battle of Earthbound]] was like......Also note that this troper was serving his in-school suspension alone. In a [[LockedInARoom VERY small, dimly-lit, windowless meeting room]] [[AndIMustScream while watching this.]] It wasn't TOO bad at first, but then the nightmares came later that night...Even after 4 years, this troper has built up what amounts to a "self-defense reflex mechanism," reacting to any sign of Giygas. Hell, [[JumpScare even seeing a thumbnail picture of him]] in a 'related videos' link on Youtube is [[CatScare enough to make this troper press Backspace in the blink of an eye.]] * This troper has always been creeped out by the holiday events in Animal Crossing. The screen suddenly fades out and you get a picture of the train station, along with a text box announcing the start of whatever event it is. The thing that creeps him out about this is that the text box doesn't have a name showing who's speaking. Your only hint is that it's the female voice. [[NothingIsScarier It's up to your imagination to figure out who -- or what -- is announcing the event.]] * This troper nearly shit himself the first time he fought feral ghouls when playing Fallout 3. It freaked me out far worse than the first time I came across an Enclave soldier. The latter was merely an "Oh, crap" moment. * For [[@/{{Tadaru}} this troper]], [[WombLevel Womb Levels]] have literally become NightmareFuel. He's had a nightmare based on {{Gradius}} where he was inside one of them. ** You're not the only one. The Womb Levels in Gradius also gave this troper a nightmare. If he recalls, it was where he was in a WombLevel and was trying to run away from these giant space worm... [[BuffySpeak things.]] * Same troper as two bullet points ago played an incredibly obscure game called ''Sen-Know'' which is basically a [[XMeetsY Pipe Mania with falling blocks]] puzzle game, where supposedly the playing field represents someone's brain. The GameOver screen with the word "OVERLOAD" terrified him so badly that he immediately deleted it from his hard drive and vows to never play it again. [[FridgeHorror The thought of him suddenly succumbing to a stroke due to his brain being overloaded]]... * When this Troper was a lot younger, I set up ''[[PokemonSnap Pokmon Snap]]'' for my little sister and cousin, and left 'em to it. When I came back to tell them it was time for the cousin to get ready to go home, I told them they could save over our old file with a new game if they wanted. I'd noticed, when they quit the course they were on, Professor Oak's "Welcome back, [Player Name]!" was missing, well, the player's name, but thought nothing of it. When they went to save it, however, a saving error message popped up instead, with Professor Oak saying "This is awful!". Absolutely nothing, right? But we all screamed and shut the damn thing off in a hurry. Much, much later, when I worked up the courage to try and recreate it again out of curiosity, I tried not entering a name for the player, but found it just defaults it to "Todd". Have no idea what caused it- could've just

been a random glitch. But it kept all three of us from playing the game for years! * As a little kid, this Troper played Pokemon Blue, but got immediately stuck in the very first city. He just didn't get what to do until his friend told him that he had to go through the tall grass, where the little monsters waited to be caught. The troper was so scared, he just refused to do it, but it was of course senseless. Some days later he eventually just overcame his fear, just to find out that there was something worse waiting for him.. (Prof. Oak taking little boys with him is just creepy..) * In BattleForWesnoth, you nowadays have the choice to let your level 2 Dark Sorcerer/Sorceress (depending on gender) choose to become either a Necromancer or a Lich. Necromancers stay human, but Liches become skeletons of Immortality types V and possibly II - it's stated in their description that it is not known whether they live forever or the black magic just lets you live ''a little'' longer than the average human, and I think that they keep their full conciousness. Now, if they keep their conciousness, and the change from Sorcerer to Lich is just a few seconds... [[BodyHorror Imagine the PAIN when fastforwarding the process or your body rotting away!!]] In the old days you had to make it happen someday, but if you're playing a newer version,[[WhatTheHellPlayer you make this happen only because you either find this unit cooler or simply like it better!]] Guess who's never going to use a Lich again... * When this troper was about 8, a friend brought over the game Banjo Kazooie. He would play it while she watched, but it scared her...something about the music in the first level of the game (the tune of The Bear's Picnic) and the way the character models were or...SOMETHING...just freaked this troper out. Her friend lent her the game against her will simply because it freaked her out so much. Needless to say, it stayed hidden most of the time until she was able to force it back onto him. Just thinking about it now still...*shudder* * Believe it or not, this troper found nightmare fuel on a SesameStreet game of all places. The cartidge includes two games, one of the named "Astro Grover" in which you have to do simple math problems with [[LittleGreenMen little green aliens]] called "Zips". Sounds harmless, right? Unfortunately most of the stages have this WeirdMoon with a face that just stares at the zips and if you make a mistake the moon shakes it's head "no" with a weird frown while the [[HellIsThatNoise most disturbing music]] I ever heard on an NES game plays. This troper even had a nightmare featuring that [[BadMoonRising damn moon]]. ** What, no Oddworld Abe's Oddysee? My dad played that game when I was really little, like 4-5 maybe. The game itself wasn't scary, but whenever I was out in the living room with him, he'd leave it at the title screen where Abe's just babbling (it seemed like that to me) and looking badly animated (don't know why, but the Playstation 1's graphics always manage to be the scariest for me, probably a mix of them being vague but accurate on the basics.) He would just leave it on while I stood behind a wall screaming at him to turn it off while he just laughed at me. Heck, wouldn't you be a scared 4-5 year old

seeing [[http://www.youngmanblog.com/wpcontent/uploads/2011/03/oddworld-abes-oddysee-img651637.jpg this]] face in an entirely dark room babbling nonsense at you? * Any enemy with the word Tower in its name from {{Persona 3}} scares this player. It's a stack of spinning heads with crowns, and when one casts a spell, you hear the sound of chains rattling and an [[HellIsThatNoise awful, low-pitched cry]]. That's scary enough on its own, but I had the misfortune of the game glitching up so that other enemies started making that sound too. I just shut off the PS2 when that happens. * I'm going to start out on a note that isn't directly related to video games, but bear with me. My school's production of LittleShopOfHorrors was excellent-- the singing was amazing, the actors were perfect for the roles, and the puppet for Audrey 2 was ''really'' cool. Even the ending, though it implied an eventual world conquest, was awesome. What ''wasn't'' appreciated was the fact that the final sound we were treated to was Audrey 2's laugh. Whoever was voicing him must do a dead-ringer for [[RatchetAndClank Clank]], since it was the ''exact same laugh'' in a monstrous tone. Whereas everyone else was standing and cheering, I stayed in my seat, stunned to nearsilence, clapping on autopilot. * SonicTheHedgehog's classic death animation kept this troper from trying to get much farther than his CoolBigSis in those games until he revisited them as a teen. Just watching it- the sudden "DONG" sound, the way Sonic stares straight at the screen, the way he just pops up suddenly, the apparent suffering- was terrifying. It still motivates me to keep my rings up and avoid death traps in those games to this day. And I still wince every time Sonic dies. * This Troper was always scared by the OS9 game Nanosaur, the basic story of the game is you are a new type of Dinosaur (a Nanosaur) from two-thousand years into the future (4122) where the humans have been wiped out and you've been sent back to the time of the dinosaurs to get eggs to save the Nanosaur society. Of course, throughout the game, you get attacked by various Dinosaurs,[[StockDinosaurs the usual]]: TyrannosaurusRex Stegosaurus, Triceratops, Pteranodon (though that's not a Dinosaur it's a Pterosaur), also Dilophosaurus [[JurassicPark which spits and has frill]]. For this troper, it was the T-Rex's sound that freaked him out, i t's deep rattly roar was [[HellIsThatNoise absolutely terrifying]]. The Triceratops sometimes hid in bushes and when you walked by, it would charge out and make similar horrifying sound. And don't even get me started on the sound of the rolling boulders! But needless to say, this troper still has dreams about the game and he hasn't played it in five. Frickin'. Years! If you want to share my dreams, [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgdEx59_AuQ watch]] [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RLqqs86_Mng these.]] * This troper has found 4 things that scared her in the Sly Cooper games of all places! The first one is that absolutely HORRIBLE noise Clockwerk makes when he's hit, to this very day. it still scares her. The second is every single level involving high places. The third happened once. I had just gotten the anti gravity move, excited I ran out to a ledge. What happened? The game launched me God knows how high

up, then I plummeted down fast, landing on the roof above the ledge I tried the move out on. The final one is those huge spiders from Mz. Rubys levels. I'd like to f****** add that creepy as hell look Dimitri gives in his intro scene. Y'know the one where his eyes are blood red and there are darker red hypnotic spirals in them and he's smiling like a damn psycho? I love the guy, but that's just creepy. As well as the picture used for episode 3. Is that a fugging {{Slasher Smile}} in a KIDS GAME? The fact that he's a massive ass tiger(as compared to Neyla and new comer El Jeffe, who aren't too musclularish, just tall) doesn't help much either. * I played a lot of Crash Bandicoot as a kid. I loved it and never really had any trouble with it emotionally, and then you get [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emmVZh1w3EY this]]. The music is bad enough without all the creepy echoing, plus the fact that I was sort of afraid of the TNT boxes at first and this level is chock full of them. And then you've got Cortex's GIANT EMOTIONLESS HEAD BOBBING BACK AND FORTH. * This troper completely freaked out while playing Trauma Team's "Resolution" level in the endoscopy portion. She won't be too detailed, but it involves the things that freak her out the most: claustrophobia; dark, unlit spaces; and the dying moans of [[spoiler: Gabriel Cunningham]]. She chickened out on the level and made her brother do it. * This troper is scared shitless when he sees frogs or frog-like creatures, so when playing MetalGearSolid3 and discovered that [[WhyDidItHaveToBeSnakes a majority of the areas in the game contains frogs]] he shed {{Tears of Fear}}. Upon reaching the cave after fighting Ocelot, and discovering a tunnel filled with nothing but them, he needed a year away from the game just to man up the courage to slowly crawl through it. * Some of the stellar systems in {{Freelancer}} positively freak this troper out - e.g. the terrifyingly huuuuuge sun in Omega-11. It's probably no accident that the freaky systems are also high-radiation zones in the Border Worlds. * ''TheJourneymanProject'' had many examples of nightmare fuel, such as the killer robots and creepy ambient sounds, but the Presto Studios logo and the title screen animation especially freaked this troper out as a kid. Worse, the volume is set at max when you first start it, such that the bombastic music and sounds (similar to Viacom's [[VanityPlate "V of Doom"]], but worse) are [[SensoryAbuse earsplitting]]. [[/folder]] [[folder:Western Animation]] * The Valentine's Day episode of Spongebob, or at least the scene where Patrick goes insane and Yandere over not getting a present from the titular character. Sure it was pretty [[Narm narmy]], with gems such as "HEART ON STICK MUST DIE!", but Patrick going insane like that scarred this troper for life. Same goes with another Spongebob episode where he goes to live with the jellyfish, and Patrick exclaims, "If I can't have you as a friend....I'm gonna make you a trophy!" Even as a person going into high school, I'm still scared of that.

* As a kid, This Troper watched the Headless Horseman episode of Scooby Doo. It terrified him to such a degree that for more than an entire year he couldn't stand to be alone anywhere except inside his home. Anywhere else and he got scared the horseman might appear. * Christ, that {{Runaway Brain}} Mickey Mouse cartoon. I didn't even see the whole short, but the 4-year old me remembered the commercial being just terrifying enough to have me in a state that felt like paralysis. Seeing Mickey in a considerably dark scenario has given me an uneasy perspective of the mouse once the memory came back one day. ** Agreed. [[{{Tropers/Mort08}} I]] had been looking at the page for the short and thought "Well, how scary could it be now that I know what happens?" I clicked on the link...and had to shut it off after seeing the ''title card.'' What were they ''thinking?'' * This troper will always maintain that the episode of [[CourageTheCowardlyDog Courage the Cowardly Dog]] where the trio had to team up to repair the windmill or else they'd be killed by [[OurGhostsAreDifferent ghost warriors]] is THE scariest episode of that series he's ever seen. The perpetually red skyline plus the chilling [[ScareChord music]] throughout the episode...''brrrrr.'' * This troper watched a single image of [[TotalDramaIsland zombie Ezekiel]]. At 4:00 am. She couldn't sleep for five nights. * [[@/{{Tadaru}} This troper]] is unfazed by almost every Halloween special on TheSimpsons, which are HighOctaneNightmareFuel. Yet he finds the episodes "The Joy of Sect" and "The Computer Wore Menace Shoes" ''absolutely terrifying''. * This Troper, Always hated Zaboomafoo. I don't care if I spelled it wrong. The actual show was pretty good, But when you see the claymation scenes... That all changes. * This troper used to have nightmares from the 10,000 Volt Ghost from the old Scooby Doo series. When the live-action movie came out, she had trouble watching the scenes with the 10,000 Volt Ghost out of fear that the nightmares would return. They didn't, thankfully. * This troper is agoraphobic thanks to [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAZXVxfPkac this lovely scene]] from an episode of [[SpongebobSquarepants Spongebob]]. ** [[{{Tropers/Spinosegnosaurus77}} This troper]] is too scared to click, but if that scene is from "Ghost Host" or "Night Light", then he fully agrees with you. *** FYI, it's the "alone" scene from ''SB-129.'' I was never scared by that part; it was the prehistoric SpongeBob and Patrick which had me covering my eyes. * This troper remembers the first time she ever watched [[PowerpuffGirls The Powerpuff Girls]]. What episode could it possibly be you ask? [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wqy35wU-CTs Speed Demon]]. The episode where the girls end up traveling 50 years into the future to find a wastelandish Townsville where Him is in charge. All their friends and family are either crazy or dead, and everyone is incredibly old. Although to most kids that would only be a bit of a shock, this troper was only four years old and had no idea what the show was like. She screamed and was in tears, running out of the room before the episode was even over. She refused to watch the show until she was seven, and refused to watch the episode in question for many

years later. She is now sixteen, and still has a bit of a hard time watching the episode. * I was scared by The Offbeats as a child for some reason. Maybe because of the dog, which is all I can remeber, which looked like the United Plankton logo. [[folder: Other ]] I remember that I was about 5 or 6 years old, when my family and I went to McDonalds and they were having an anniversary or something. And so, they had people in costumes going around while people ate. There were two costumes that freaked me out, there was the Ronald McDonald one (probably because I was scared of clowns), and then there was a Grimace one that would just waddle toward you and the costume couldn't blink or move it's mouth. But it was extremely terrifying, and then we headed out the door I swear I saw Grimace trying to chase after us. *shivers* [[/folder]]

---Regain control of your bodily functions and go back to NightmareFuel.

NightmareFuelColoringBook * [[{{Robbychu}} This troper]] drew some truly horrific creatures when she was younger. They were all different beasties, but they all tended to have qualities that a young child considers monstrous. Like multiple mouths, large claws, sharp teeth, high levels of intellegence, humitarian tendencies... Yeah, this troper was and still is a little messed up in the head. Now while she does draw monsters, they tend to be less NightmareFuel-y. * [[FigmentJedi This Troper]] always liked to put the bear on the Village Inn Kids Menus into all sorts of peril. Most notably, having velociraptors emerge from a time portal or surrounded by {{Kaiju}} in Japan. * In late elementary school, I'd often sketch the Court of Azathoth, with formless tentacled pipers and some real nice trompe l'oeil AlienGeometries. Of course, my teacher ''was'' an artist with Barlowe's Guide to Extraterrestrials lying about, not to mention an Escher collection and occasional Geger namedrops... * [[{{Frau_Eva}} This Troper]] was known for drawing things that weren't horrifying, just...strange and something a child usually shouldn't be drawing. One picture had a few friends who were being mean to me at the time with giant Pac-men mouths blowing me away in the wind. It was titled "Big-Mouthed Bitches." I was five. Another had a prince who had just saved a virgin princess--you could tell by the blue veil like Mary, I obviously went to Catholic school--and

nonetheless the prince had a giant thought-bubble with a woman in a hot pink maid's uniform. That's a rather developed sense of the Madonna/Whore Complex for seven. ** A more correct translation of the word that was translated for "Virgin" would be "Young Woman". Just sayin, they even lied about that. ** That's oddly awesome. This troper's self portraits were ''always'' clad in blue for many years-- because hey, my name's Mary. That's how we do. * This troper recently found an old drawing book from when she was a kid. It's full of pictures of horrific torture scenes depicting relatives I didn't get along with and bullies. It's in my style, but I don't remember drawing any of it, or feeling the need to. * Does this count? Once found, in a pile of Archies bought at the flea market, one specific one where inked additions gave the impression that Betty and Veronica had very little control of their systems below the waist. * This troper has always loved creating monsters, and she drew quite a lot of them when she was a kid. Some of them were fairly standard {{Mons}}, but a couple of them were rather creepy--such as a poisontoting GrimReaper figure with a cougar skull instead of a human one beneath their hood. She kept them all in a huge folder she dubbed the "Nano Beast" files. This lead to a [[MemeticMutation meme]] in this troper's family, when her mother looked at said file--she tried to ask this troper if she could draw ''trees'' like every other artist, but mispoke, and said [[InherentlyFunnyWords "cheese."]] [[HilarityEnsues Hilarity Ensued.]] * Similar to the above, I drew lots of Mons. They usually didn't get much worse than being really toothy and maybe having some extra arms, but once I came up with a rather nasty critter with flaming hands missing flesh on its wings and face whose schtick was to kill you and eat every bit of meat off of your entire skeleton. * {{Midna}}: ...oh boy, where to begin? Well, in the past, I've drawn both the [[spoiler:princess monster and giant red eye]] from ''{{Eversion}}'' and the skull lady from the [=MacVenture=] game ''Uninvited''. There's also inversions of the trope - I've found myself constantly drawing [[TheLegendOfZelda my namesake]], possibly because of Main/PerverseSexualLust. * This troper here did lots of Haunted Mansion style portraits of people he hates suffering a horrible fate. * This troper's parents believed he was mentally disturbed when, after being outside in the dark and being incredibly terrified, he drew a Ridley-esque demon creature multiple times a day for weeks. I can't recall if I really believed I saw it or if it weird coincidence... but anyway, [[IGotBetter]]. * This troper draws, in school, many pencil drawings of various violent events/horrific characters. However, my style - like XKCD's but uglier and more pencil-y - sort of ruins any fear they might inspire. * This troper likes to draw skeletons, skeletons doing jumpingjacks in sweatbands, Skeleton Cupids flying over a atomicaly correct heart on a valentines day card, the troper also likes to draw ghosts with

different disfigurements, One of her faviorites is headless Ned, another is Mangle, who can only be discribed as a Moulin Rouge escapee who got part her face and eye eatten away by a bear. * [[ShadowQueen This troper]] once drew Shadow Queen Peach from VideoGame/PaperMario: The Thousand Year Door holding Mario's disembodied head in lots of gory details. I then told my little sister "this is what happens when you choose the bad ending in the game." Was she scarred for life? Yes. [[{{Jerkass}} Am I a sadistic bitch? HECK YES.]] * This Troper remembers drawing blazing flames destroying his house, his school, random people and his parents. He remembers showing one of these to his mum, she looked at it, grunted and then handed him a picture she drew of her boss slowly being burned by a shitload of zippo lighters. It was a bonding moment for us. ** ''[[CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming That's frickin']] [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome epic]].'' * An inversion for this Tropette. At age four, my aunt took me to an art museum. I pointed to a painting and said, "Look, Aunt Teresa! There's a painting of a lady who's going to have her head cut off!" My aunt said she was probably just sick, and was being helped, but then we went to go look at the picture. ''I was right.'' At the age of four, I was able to recognize an execution. * When i was in second grade, my class was given the assignment to draw a picture of ourselves enjoying various types of weather. My friend got assigned wind. He drew a picture of the wind blowing his head off his body, complete with blood and organs coming out of it. * Ah yes, it's about time a trope like this appeared. I've created some... scary things in my many sketchbooks. My work ranges from killing [[SuperDeformed chibi]] soldiers in increasingly horrific and gory ways, to GrotesqueGallery/BodyHorror monsters, to gigantic EldritchAbominations. * This troper was going through old pictures that she drew when she was but the tender age of five, when she came upon a small "book" she drew (which were basically a bunch of pictures taped together.) The title (written by my mom of course) was "Aliens". This pretty much explains how I was like as a child. * This troper, misunderstanding a project set by her teacher back in 2001 when she was seven, drew pictures of what she thought 9/11 had looked like- people crying over dead bodies, dismembered, covered in blood, burning to death, being crushed, trampled to death under the feet of people trying to escape, screaming in agony etc. She couldn't understand why everyone was making a fuss. She can't quite remember the details but thinks she was supposed to draw a condolence card or something, was probably daydreaming and only caught the part her teacher told the kids about 'realising the full scale of this awful tragedy'. ** And now I've just discovered a bunch of doodles in the back of my old science book, the sanest one being a stick figure with a massive afro (a comb sticking out of it and everything) giving the finger, wearing massive platform boots with spikes sticking out the bottom, standing on some other random stick figure lying in a pool of red ink/blood. There seems to be a cat or some other unidentifiable

creature eating the dead figure's face. * This troper has been drawing twisted creatures on sticky notes for fun, the scarest ones are a female ragdoll with one button eye torn off and a creatures who at first appears to be two headed, then on closer look, it is actually conjoined, one head is sharing the other heads long tounge, and disgutingly trying to sperates. * This troper isn't quite known for exactly Nightmare Fuel drawings, but rather ... just generally creepy and/or weird. She has found a piece of paper with what ends up looking like a senseless murder - 3 panels involving stick figures of an old woman, a young person (kid? teenager?) and a gun, with the final panel just being a coffin with the cheery words "THE END!" emblazoned at the top. * This troper, in her younger years, would waste reams of paper sketching out elaborate, top-down "battlefield" scenes of human soldiers fighting against whatever MonsterOfTheWeek (zombies, werewolves, [[EldritchAbomination otherworldly tentacle-folk]], you know) army decided to attack them. The monsters always won, and usually made a gory mess of things to boot. One of the more memorable additions was what appeared to be a pack of wolves converging on a dying man's ripped-open torso... * This troper, though she was squeamish as hell in elementary school at the sight of dismemberment- prop body parts at Halloween caused nightmares for days one year- seemed to love drawing it scenes of death and the macabre. She was told off in art class for drawing skulls and skeletons hanging from nooses on Halloween projects, at one point drew a Medusa head dripping with gore for fun (during a Greek mythology obsession), and in what she considers her {{Crowning Moment of Awesome}} for elementary school, chopped up the little Civil War characters on the worksheets given for a diorama in fifth grade and lovingly drew red gel-pen "blood" on the stumps of the amputated limbs for a medic's tent scene. This act got her a "best history student" award at the end of the year. * This troper's book of doodles contains some truly disturbing things. I label them with wonderful names like ''"Eviscerated Clown"'', ''"The Boneless Corpse"'' and ''"Remains of a Burnt Cat"''. * This feline at heart troper has some really weird drawings featuring Jughead with demon wings, spikes growing out of his back, and covered in chains. There's a little comic I made featuring Archie knocking on the door, and then getting chased away by this freaky looking version of Jughead. Did I mention that this troper was eight when she made the first picture of this version of the character? * In a literal example of this trope, [[{{Brodyaga}} this troper]] once got a coloring book where a good number of the pictures were alarmingly dismal. (Naturally, it was from Poland.) There was one with a bunch of kids in costume, but instead of looking happy and celebratory they were just scowling out at the viewer in stoic hatred. And one with a ship about to capsize in a storm. One picture - this is more like Depression Fuel - was of a prisoner behind bars who had kicked his bucket of bread over and was holding his face in his hands in despair. This troper felt ''so bad'' for the depressed prisoner he'd literally stay up nights thinking about it, almost in tears. Also, for some reason a few of the pictures had a little notice on

them saying "Do not color until age 7!" (Or six, et cetera.) It was all a little threatening. * This troper has a habit of drawing monsters from his nightmares, in addition to gory violent cartoons, various StarfishAliens, and {{Eldritch Abomination}}s. * This troper has a little notebook where random ideas go, even if they make no sense. Most of these pages are strange and humorous, but two pages weird me out and make me wonder why I put them in. One is the number "12" written over and over and over while random smiling faces float around with empty soul-staring eyes. The other page is pretty similar. Except with "fire" instead of 12 and instead of floating smiling faces the bottom of the page is covered with a drawing of a flame. I happen to be very good at drawing flames. * One day I took a course on how to draw cartoon characters. The course wasn't very good, so what did I start drawing instead? [[BodyHorror Spengbab]]. To quote the guy sitting next to me, "My eyes feel violated." I got in trouble for it. * This troper and his friends once played a Christmas-themed "Call of Cthulhu" roleplaying game his brother made up. One of the clues he created for the game was a kid's crayon drawing of Santa Claus in his sleigh... with a pair of black-robed monsters in the back seat. * I definately have alot of drawings like this. I draw one of two things: manga sketches, or horrible monster creatures generally. Some of my favorite tend to be pus-oozing, egg carrying insectoid creatures. Fun fun. * This Troper mostly draws in a whimsical style, with huge bug-eyes and such. But, he has tendencies to draw horrific creatures every now and then. Once, I drew a alligator-like creature that had an ''eye sticking out of it's mouth'' and noodly legs that are often in knots. Pretty whimsical, eh? * This Troper had a brother who got in trouble at school for doodling a picture of a tank running over the school and the principal spontaneously combusting. The teacher took it away and gave him a notebook she doodled one- with flowers and kitties. He said that gave him nightmares. * Said Troper more recently had her nephew (not brother's son!) go through this. The nephew was told by his Kindergarten teacher to draw members of his family. He drew a picture of his mother being hung by her boyfriend with a belt. What's worse, said boyfriend was recently indited for murder. Brother-in-law is suing for sole custody. * This troper remembers watching his older siblings playing the Legacy of Kain games, then, under no prompting of his own, gleefully using the word 'impaling' (he was seven!) in description of a picture including, among other things, stickmen being dismembered by falling on giant spikes. To his mother. Who commented "you have a very morbid imagination, don't you..." He now writes fantasy and sci-fi horror novels. Funny thing, life. * Let's see... Eldritch Abomination in the form of thousands of little clay figures... check. Demon impaling a child (scene in a story of mine) on its giant claws... check. Realistic vampire eating a dead deer... check. Small girl transforming into a horrific monster, without realizing what's happening... check. Grotesque versions of

cute fantasy characters... check. Yep, I'm nuts. * When [[{{Kuzlalala}} This Troper]] was in 5th grade, she likes to draw an Albino Girl (no, this girl is not albino) killing some bullies, due to being bullied by boys (which contradicts the WouldNotHitAGirl trope). She even made a comic about it. * Eehehehehe.... This troper is responsible for THIS [[http://browse.deviantart.com/?qh=ion=&q=Dark+Dedede&loggedin=1#/d2c ji6p atrocity]]. Sweet Dreams... * This Troper loves to imagine her own EldritchAbomination. When questioned, she presers to just smile. Why, yes, I have perfected the StepfordSmiler look~! :D * this troper would think of very violent,bloody,with a use of excessive murder torture(and i mean something like, HIGURASHI NO NAKU KORO NI has nothing on me) type things( hers is an example of what this 12 year old can do, on the spot), when a teacher found out a kids comic and thought a kid was sneezing,when, he was hemorrhaging and then he kept reading what looked like a drama comic was actually a horror comic from a man who is being tortured by a killer doctor, the kid got a creepy slasher smile took the teacher to ask a question, killed the teacher, wrote in blood on a wall"alex was here" when back to turturing what looked like a kid, after the bloody-burnt-scarednaked-raped-9 year old woke up he said this. scary as hell read with caution [[spoiler: whats that needle?]] * This Troper's little sister is normally just a cute little kid, but sometimes becomes something of a {{Creepy Child}}, especially when she gets hold of a sheet of paper and any sort of drawing implement. The most recent incident that I know of was when she was drawing a somewhat inaccurate, but definitely recognizable picture of Zetsu, from {{Naruto}}. Yes, [[http://1.bp.blogspot.com/__8q87ZAYiv4/SwfwlnL9r7I/AAAAAAAAACo/AXUg4f ArLvY/s400/zetsu.jpg that]] Zetsu. She's also drawn these hairy... monstrous... ''things'' on a regular basis. * This troper recently drew a christmas tree surrounded by elves, worshipping it. Not creepy? The entire picture is in silhouette. Still not creepy? The pointy bits representing the layers of leaves reach out into tentacles, some of them forming the knots around the presents underneath, while the baubles on the tree crash to the ground, leaking an unknown black fluid. Still not creepy? The tree has a large, staring eye in the middle of it, just watching. The "star" is a pentagram. He also drew a picture of a bowling ball, but, again, in silhouette, with an unknown light eminating from within. Turns out, three big colorless lights eminating from a sphere of darkness is creepy. * As a young girl this troper watched the episode of {{Inuyasha}} in which the titular demon cuts of his brother's arm (as he's in his giant dog type thing mode). Somehow inspired, she rushed to her computer an reinacted the scene on MSPaint, even turning Sesshomaru back into his human form, with a bleeding stump. [[{{WhatAnIdiot}} The computer was in her parent's room.]] After her shower, she returned to find her...''somewhat'' concerned parents asking why she had drawn "[[{{ViewerGenderConfusion}} two girls doing that to each other.]]" After a long talk I was forbidden from watching Toonami for a while.

* This troper is an inversion in a way, when I was younger I drew normal stuff but now I always get told my pictures are creepy * When I was younger, I used to draw pictures of dinosaurs eating people. In one of them, a person's intestines were slashed open by a Velociraptor, and I drew the intestines hanging out of the belly. Everybody I showed them to said that they were very terrifying. And when I showed them to my sister, she started crying. Now I don't draw them anymore. However, I recently found the drawings in the garage, and I thought they were very scary. * When my little brother was about 5-7 he was fascinated by war movies and he would draw pictures of people getting ripped apart by machine gun fire or stabbed with bayonets, he would also draw pirates killing each other and being eaten by sea monsters, once during the first grade I was asked to draw a picture of the Mayflower but I couldn't draw very well so I had him help me and he drew pilgrims fighting, stabbing and shooting each other, drowning etc with copious blood, strangely enough the teacher gave me an A and the drawing was never questioned. ** Two more examples one was a very messed up kid who went to my school in the fourth grade, in art class he would draw the most violent things such as people being eaten by zombies, people being stabbed, decapitated, torn in half, eaten or stepped on by dinosaurs, etc, these along with his severe anger issues and violent behavior led him to being kicked out and taken away for treatment. The other was a boy in my neighborhood for whatever reason he was really messed up in the head he would draw pictures of himself killing people such as presidents, tv characters, and his younger brother, thankfully these two got help and are better people because of it. * This troper nearly got packed off to the nuthouse when he was little because he was morbidly depressed, drawing all his pictures with dead grass and trees, dark sky, red sun etc. He isn't depressed, but he is extremely colourblind. * As a child, @/FarseerLolotea often drew weird monsters and violent combat scenes. * This troper's art style is usually very cute and {{Animesque}}, but every once in a while he can't resist drawing horrible abominations with severe cases of {{Body Horror}}.(This contrast used to freak out my parents... which naturally led to me drawing [[UpToEleven more of them]].) These days, I'm devising a comic where I can draw both ways and get away with it. * When this troper was a child she wrote a story about a small animal getting eaten by bigger animals. It's last words? [[spoiler: What's going on with my parents?]] * When my friend was younger, she was angry at a teacher at school, so she drew a little book about the teacher getting eaten by dinosaurs. Me and my friend, as teenagers then decided to draw some interesting pictures of her ex boyfriend after they had broken up and she was angry at him...him being decapitated, someone shoving a chainsaw up his ass, him falling off a building onto spikes, tied to a block of concrete and pushed into the sea, him getting eaten by dinosaurs, him being served a meal with his own hairy balls on the top of it, him getting his penis caught in a shredder, him put in a giant blender...

** I think you two were the inspiration for Hannibal... * When I was nine, I entered what I call my 'Goth times'. Just imagine a [[PaleSkinnedBrunette cute girl]] with genki like tendencies drawing skulls and bones, bleeding people in the floor, the death looking for souls to take, little girls with chainsaws and menacing people, bondage, torture, complaining ghosts, some teenager going AxCrazy and killing her boyfriend because he cheated on her...Oh, and made into comic with poorly written GallowsHumour. * Seems to run in this troper's family. [[CovertPervert I]] had an [[TroublingUnchildhoodBehavior odd penchance]] for drawing [[FetishFuel over-sexed things]] (eg: a giant pair of [[GagBoobs boobs]] - [[WhatAnIdiot and I showed my mother]]) and occasionally extremely [[{{Wangst}} Wangsty]] self-portraits. And I drew little [[NakedPeopleAreFunny naked paperdolls]] and roleplayed [[IkeaErotica sex-scenes]] with them. This is the ages 8-12. At least I mostly had the sense to [[CovertPervert keep it to myself]]. ** My ''brother'' had this [[UpToEleven even worse]]. When he was in kindergarten, he used to constantly draw [[NothingIsScarier Black Holes]] (like the one from TheRescuers ) on all of his drawings. It was just [[NothingIsScarier there]]. [[NightmareFuel All the time]]. His teachers were very disturbed. *** He still draws disturbing things, but it's [[AgeAppropriateAngst less disturbing]] because now he's [[EmoTeen fourteen]]. Think 'Encyclopedia of Killing Yourself', but with a [[CatGirl floppy fringed cat-boy]]. ** Also an occasionally InvokedTrope , me and my bro will draw very strange and creepy things for laughs. Even moreso with me and my [[RomanticTwoGirlFriendship best-friend]]... Times New Roman has never been creepier. * Tjis troper went temporarily mad one day and decided to draw a creature with a mouth where it's chest used to be, with a long, triparate tounge snaking out (which eventually ended up as nine CombatTentacles). The legs are covered in sores with eyes, and musculature poking out; and the feet are a ten-toed claw and a nest of pseudopods. one hand is a massive claw; the other is another morass of tentacles. it's normal eyes are rotted away, and it's standing in front of a wall covered in MeatMoss grown from the organs that squrted out of the monster when it changed. the caption? [[{{Zalgo}} '''HE COMES''']]. He also drew a skull that's normal on one side; with multiple eyes and a third jaw on the other. * This troper's former social studies teacher told this troper's class about when he was student-teaching a kindergarten or first grade class (she can't remember). The kids were assigned by their teacher something along the lines of "draw something about your life". The student-teacher was looking through the drawings once they were collected, and he saw that one child had drawn genitals, weapons, etc. Quite a sad example of this trope. * A few years ago in school, we were studying the Middle Ages when we got an assignment to create a monastery-style illumination of our names based around something we liked. For my subject, I chose cats. Also, I was all too aware of what they ''did'' to cats back then. And so, I turned in a picture of my simple name...surrounding by drawings

of brightly colored StepfordSmiler kitties burning a monk at the stake, then dancing on his grave in a TastesLikeDiabetes landscape complete with bright blue skies and a smiley face sun. Did I mention you could SEE the monk's skeleton lying in the ground right below the latter scene? Yeah, I was proud of it. * As a kid, I drew mainly three things: dinosaurs, aliens, and people being killed by dinosaurs and aliens. When I was seven years old, I drew a school being attacked by a UFO and a bunch of kids getting guns to fight back. This was about 6 or so months after Columbine, which I hardly knew anything about. To everyone else, I was apparently drawing a school shooting taking place and needed to be placed in therapy pronto. * This Troper drew a lot of [[EldritchAbomination large, complex monsters]], complete with soulless staring eyes, giant tentacles, and huge fangs and claws in the margins of her notebooks in 3rd grade. When we had to turn those notebooks in at the end of the year... well, my parents got an e-mail from my teacher... * This Troper and his twin brother (who is also a Troper) while in the first grade developed a fictional character named John Hasey. He was like this secret agent action hero, who did cool stuff and saved the world. I (switching to first person) had a bunch of drawings of him being badass, then one day my brother asked me to draw a picture of him RIPPING OFF SOME GUY'S FACE!!! It took me about a week to agree to draw it. Then, when I did, my teacher saw it and was REALLY disturbed. She took it down to the paper-copying room to make a copy to show to my parents. In the end, it was decided that my drawing meant no harm. ** I still draw some disturbing pictures from time to time, one including when I had a nosebleed, [[{{Squick}} I splattered MY OWN BLOOD all over the page]] [[NauseaFuel to make the dead bodies in the picture seam more "real"]]. Also when I was three, I drew scary looking monster that had PENIS! [[{{Understatement}} I am so screwed up...]] * This troper drew a picture of my character Marigold. Marigold has only one eye but covers the missing one with an orange eyepatch. I showed drawing to a fiend and he thought she was creepy. That was not what I was going for. <<|TroperTales|>> No! Don't go back to Main/NightmareFuelColoringBook! ''They'll'' get you if you do!

NightmareFuelDisneyParks * This troper's mother once rode a loop-de-loop rollercoaster... w/out being strapped in. It wasn't her fault- she's very tall and longlegged, so she didn't really fit in the seat, but before she had a chance to say anything... ** [[TooDumbToLive Why the hell did she even get on?!?]] ** You think thats bad? I was on the same train (or whatever the ride vehicle) as the 14 year old girl at Rock 'n' Roller coaster, it was not pleasant at all *** ...You mean the one who '''''died'''''?!?

**** Yes. And, being the ride mentality, everyone got off at the end, not aware that the girl was...urg. And later when we went back to ride on it, the outside attendants had not been briefed, they had just been told there was an incident and the ride was closed. ***** This troper would like to add that Disney World's Pirates of the Carribean has an alleged ghost of a formal employee named George. *** This Troper once went on a ride with a lap bar that went across the whole row. He was sitting next to a very large woman, so it didn't go down over him at all. Needless to say he was quite scared on that ride. * This troper late one night decided to research and read about all of the major incidents that have occurred at Disney Land. Needless to say, he couldn't sleep for the night. * This troper went to the Disneyland version of "Snow White's Scary Adventures". After the Queen turned into that old lady and said "Mirror, mirror, on the wall..." * spins around to show nightmarish old lady* "With ''this disguise I'll fool them all!''". This troper closed his eyes immediately after this, and didn't open them until the ride was over. * This troper recalls being significantly freaked out by [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-5YNIS8xdfY "Pinocchio's Daring Journey"]], which much like "Snow White's Scary Adventures" takes everything even remotely disturbing about the movie (characters imprisoned in cages, turning into donkeys, and a monster whale) and magnifies it by five hundred. ** That ride traumatized this troper at age 6. She didn't go back on it until she was 18. Yeah... * Worse was that, in "Mr. Toad's Wild Ride", you had a "real" steering wheel that didn't do a danged thing. This troper's mother somehow didn't notice the terrified look on her five-year-old daughter's face as she desperately tried to power-steer the lurching car away from Wall o' Doom after Wall o' Doom and cheerfully cried "Look out, we're going to crash!" and suchlike before each pants-wetting swerve. She realized and apologized after the ride, but the troper lords it over her to this day. * That ride is this troper's childhood trauma and nightmare. He was going to close his eyes after seeing the picture of Mr. Toad in his car on the end of the devil's pitchfork in hell on the wall where the cars came in and out, but this troper's father insisted it was not going to be scary. After being jerked around, told to stop by constables much larger than you, you go through a mine that says do not enter, then in front of a Judge in a seat much larger than you with a sinister looking smile on his face (and if I can remember no pupils). Then there's the whole train crash thing and when you arrive in Hell (greeted by Satan who has the judge's same sinister eyes and smile) you can actually feel heat throughout your trip from entering all the way to the exit making it very surreal. The last things you see are a goblin in a cage and scary looking eyes. This troper was traumatized after getting off left speechless and shocked by what he'd seen and had trouble getting to sleep that night and actually has had a nightmare about it and is starting to continue to have them. This troper's mother uses videos of the ride on Youtube to keep him under

control but he says it's too extreme. ** The judge traumatized this troper at around age 4 as well. She got back on it only at age 18... and that was under pressure from her two younger brothers. * My sister gets creeped out by a particular image on Disneyland's "It's a Small World" ride. The Thailand set features a silhouette of a six-armed figure dancing in a veiled temple doorway. Something about all those arms mechanically see-sawing back and forth... ** Hell, ''It's A Small World'' can be scary just for all those cutesy, crudely-animated puppets singing and dancing in unison. ** This troper was on the train, at night, while the ride was being renovated. Passing through the darkness instead of the cheery ride made images of Chucky-like possessions of the dolls flit through my head. * shivers* ** This Troper was at DW one day, and the ferry was very late, so the driver started making jokes to cheer everyone up. One of the jokes was; 'Any unattended children shall have their feet stapled to the floor of 'It's A Small World' and be taught to sing in 27 different languages.' Funny at the time, really creepy while on the ride the next day. *** Must be a stock joke in their transportation department because this troper was told a similar joke by one of the bus drivers. ** The [[http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3531/3866134329_de225a5095.jpg big, smiling clock]] and it's neverending tick-tock just pushes all my buttons for creepy; particularly the California/Paris/Tokyo variants with the full-sized exterior building (Florida's is just the clock and the outside building looks like a dressed up warehouse.) ItGetsWorse when Disneyland decided to use Small World's exterior as an "alternate experience" for the insanely popular fireworks show, projecting stuff on the building in time with the music track. At one point fire was projected on the building, giving it that Terminator 2 effect. ** This troper and her family discovered that small world is even open at 12 am, and went on, the only ones, when your very tired the song almost sounds like some evil chant... ** This troper found some ''delightful'' ValuesDissonance in one of the rooms. In one of the last rooms, it has all the different cultures together with all the dolls dressed in white. Including a doll dressed in a ''white kimono''. As in, the kind of stuff you find in J-horror and ''FatalFrame''. ** This troper finds it creepy how the ride breaks down every time he goes on it. Every. Single. Time. ** [[@/SoWeAteThem I]] live closer to Los Angeles. I've been through It's A Small World once. I was the only one on my row. I was on edge the entire time. I don't know why. The poor lighting? The {{Creepy Doll}}s that [[UncannyValley don't quite look human?]] The fact that, at points, I was not entirely sure that the song was in any discernible language? One episode of {{Bones}} too many? Either way, I paid a little extra attention just in case somebody felt compelled to sneak out from behind the scenery, crawl onto the boat and garrote me. ** This troper's experience of Small World was nothing short of horrific. I'm very sensitive to chemical smells, including chlorine. I had been on The Pirates of the Caribbean before and while I definitely

noticed the smell it didn't bother me that much so I thought I'd be okay on the other water rides. Well, they must use stronger stuff in It's A Small World because I got sick just standing in line, and it became a million times worse once I was actually in the boat because it sat so low in the water that it was like is was right under my nose. Already dizzy and nauseous, I was then transported through a Hellscape of flashing lights, bright colors, bizarrely-moving humanoid puppets, and that endless, repetitive, high-pitched chanting song. I managed to keep my composure until I got off the ride, at which point I hightailed it to the ladies' room and blew chunks. * This troper ''cannot open her eyes'' when going on the Disney ride ''Dinosaur''. ** This troper once got stuck on ''Dinosaur,'' in the part right at the end where you've returned to the present. [[spoiler: Where there's no light, and right after "You're not gonna make it! You're not gonna make it!" I couldn't resist saying "We didn't make it."]] It wasn't bad for me, but another rider pointed out that this meant some kids were probably stuck further back, being menaced by the Carnotaurus. ** There's also a seriously (in this troper's opinion) FamilyUnfriendlyAesop to top off your Nightmare Fuel in this ride. Everything else in the Animal Kingdom sends the message that nature is wonderful and all animals are our friends. "No, forget all that," says "Dinosaur". "Nature is violent and scary and insane and all the animals want to [[KillAllHumans eat you]]." *** Well, some aspects of nature ''are'' violent, and some animals ''will'' eat you. This troper heard a news story about a little human kid who was eaten by a bear. Perhaps the "all animals are our friends" message should be considered a FamilyUnfriendlyAesop on par with "take candy from strangers because everyone is nice". ** This troper made the mistake of sitting on the far right of the vehicle. At one point when the vehicle is "stuck" with a carnivorous dino lunging from the left she heard a low growl to her right. Five inches from her ear. In complete darkness. Terrifying. ** This Troper was sitting on the left of the vehicle, with her younger brother closer to the center (standard procedure in our family-- the kids sit in the center so they're not so traumatized). Which is the side that the Carnotaur emerges on, at one point. The troper is quite the dinosaur fan, but seeing a mouthful of VERY sharp teeth that close was enough to make her scream and instinctively grab her brother to make sure he was okay. ** What this troper didn't like in the ride was the way you are sent into the past, it's like your car is driving inside an explosion. The visual effects of the time travel are actually based on how a lighter works, also she hated the meteorites falling overhead, they looked too real for her, so most of the time she had her hands on her head. ** This ride ended up being one of the funniest parts of this troper's trip to Animal Kingdom, from viewing the post ride photo and seeing how absolutely terrified we all were. And we're teens and adults! *** This Troper's family too has a hilarious post ride photo from the Dinosaur ride, on which we went with another family of four. The adults are all looking at the Carnotaur with varying degrees of shock and amusement, while all four kids, including myself, are gripping the

bar in front tightly with their heads between their knees so they can't see a thing. This Troper remembers spending most of the ride with her head down and eyes closed. *** A similar thing happened with me. I went to Disney World when I was nine. My little brother LOVES dinosaurs so he was super excited to go on the ride, so we took a bunch of pictures outside the ride of me being super happy. Then we rode it. My seven year old brother was bearly big enough to ride it. I was on the side with the Carnivores. When we got off, my brother and dad were all like "Man! That was so cool!", while I was in tears. Then we took a picture of me and my brother after. Those are now the funniest before and after pictures we own. Even now, five years later, my siblings still make fun of me for being so scared of it. ** The ride drops the K-T ASTEROID ON YOU! How could it not be scary? The Carnosaur didn't bother this troper, but the prospect of being still in the Cretaceous when the asteroid hit... eeeek! ** This troper likes to play-scream on scary rides for the fun of it. Her screams on ''Dinosaur!'' were 100% pure terror. An inherant fear of machinery malfunctioning made the "loss of traction" bit much worse, and then she was right in front of the Carnotaurus on the right where they snap the picture. (The photo included her 20-year-old roommate clutching this troper's arm all the way to the shoulder and screaming - lovely blackmail.) We concluded that the sign warning of "scary dinosaurs" should be changed to "absolutely horrible terrifying dinosaurs." Then we went and did it again. ** Yo, guys! This troper actually found the video of the ride! [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1DVP9gRQeSc Click here if you wanna see]] * [[ManCalledTrue This editor]], at age six, went on The Great Movie Ride at Disney-MGM Studios. There's one section that passes through ''Alien'', during which Xenomorphs pop out from randomly-selected positions. One of them is ''directly above your head''. Guess which positions were selected for that run. The worst part was that his mother missed it and, until another trip ''several years later'' when she finally caught it, refused to believe that it actually happened. ** Oh man, that ride gave this troper a phobia of theme parks! (I've gotten better, although I still don't like going to them.) I remember, when we finally left Disney World I had a nightmare we (for some reason) had to turn around and spent another week there. Worst nightmare ever. ** And if your first exposure to said Xenomorph is having it suddenly pop out in front of you, as it was for [[{{Scrounge}} this editor]]? You'll jump out of your skin no matter where the freakin' thing comes from. ** This troper just mustered up the courage to keep her eyes open during this part of the ride just last week. They must have seriously toned it down, as all the Alien did was sit there and hiss at her. M'eh. *** Having revisited the ride recently, [[ManCalledTrue this troper]] can back that up. Too many kids like he used to be freaking out, he guesses. **** This troper admits she had her eyes closed during that part,

knowing all too well the nature of those movies. **** As of June 2009, some of the Aliens are popping out of the walls again, but it's not as many as they used to have, and pretty much only at the people right up front. **** This is the person right up front, the person who got an alien in her face. and she laughed. the person next to her was screaming though. **** This Troper was less scared of the xenomorph and more scared of the animatronic breaking and falling on her. Only a little bit less, though. ** Even as an adult, I find the "Wizard of Oz" area thoroughly disturbing. ** OH GOD THE "WIZARD OF OZ" ON THE GREAT MOVIE RIDE. I remember at about six years old, my dad made me go on this with him and my grandma. I could NOT watch the "Wizard of Oz" part. Could. Not. I distinctly remember burying my face into my dad's shoulder and sobbing. Hard. ** For a six-year-old, watching a real, live cast member (even one playing a bad guy) grasp a forbidden crystal only to turn into a horrifying skeleton is psyche-shattering. No amount of parental cajoling can convince you that no one actually died. ** This troper's brothers freaked out when they saw the skeleton (both very young at the time). It wasn't until Sis the theater techie pointed out that she had -seen- the door pivot around did they calm down. ** What about the car stopping in either a run-down '20s city or a Western town, and then the aforementioned real, live cast member, playing a gangster or a bandit, commandeer the ride, start a shootout, and possibly blow up the bank? [[{{Regiment}} This troper]] thinks they're great, but... ** And it's worth noting that in the less-often-done Western scene the bandit blows up the bank ''with the tour guide inside.'' Yeah, he/she's fine later on but many a kid has been terrified that the nice guide just died in a fire. *** this troper had somehow gotten a seat right behind the nice tour guide when this evil bandit person hops in right in front of her and all he can do is chat? *** Becomes [[NightmareRetardant Nightmare Retardant]] if you find yourself in a situation (like this troper) where the person hijacking the little tram car finds that she can't get it to work. It makes sense that some outlaw from the old west wouldn't understand such technology, and she tried to cover as best she could, but it more or less killed the moment. Admittedly, this did make her subsequent "death" a little more sad, as she had become more endearing to us than she was probably supposed to... ** This troper was walking the ride track after hours (legally, don't worry) with a Cast Member and got spooked when the animatronic banditwith-no-name moved slightly on it's hydraulics. After passing a maintenance guy, a few scenes later, she was checking out one of the animatronic Munchkins hiding in the Wizard of Oz scene thinking "it would be so freaky if it started moving." ''And it came out right at her!'' She screamed shamelessly and nearly fell to the center of the

ride track - turns out the maintenance guy set the scene into motion as a prank. She now swears that particular Munchkin lady is alive. ** During the ''Aliens'' section, when the alarms stared going off, the evil hijacker turned to this troper (then about eight or so) and yelled, "WHAT DID YOU TOUCH?" I thought it was hilarious, but now realize that it might have been scary to other children. *** this happened to this troper as well, and she just shrugged and laughed. * This troper was stuck at the vultures at the top of "Splash Mountain" that terrified her because the audio glitched. It was fifteen minutes of just sitting there, the vulture's heads turning and beaks clacking to nothing. ** At age 12, this troper was almost more freaked out that the vultures sounded like the {{Digimon}} Emperor and ''Ken'' was condemning you to death. ** This Troper rode splash mountain around dusk, she was nervous about the big drop, calming herself by watching the scenes along the way, looking back the setting sun added a cool tone to smaller drops and lifts outside, but having a big fear of heights the final lift she only looked down once,and screamed her head off,the ride photo is kinda hilarous with the troper screaming with a frightened look on her face. ** [[Tropers/{{Numbuh9494}} This Troper]] went on Splash Mountain alone. With no one else in the log. In the dark. She spent the entire ride cowering in the log trying not to look at the creepy animatronics that were casting strange shadows everywhere... ** ThisTroper saw some NightmareFuel unfolding for people on Splash Mountain. As I was walking past, I saw that one log had been stopped on the little platform right before the drop because the ride had broken down. Now, normally you get yourself all psyched up for the drop, as the ride builds to that crescendo. This time, they were just sitting up there for several minutes. The adrenaline had worn off and you could tell they were starting to get a little bored and annoyed. Suddenly the log just dropped them without any warning and the screams [[CrowningMomentOfFunny were absolutely hilarious.]] I'm going to hell. * This troper's brother was so scared of the "Honey I Shrunk the Audience" 3-D film at Epcot, he was screaming bloody murder as we exited. My parents thought we should take him on a tamer ride and were recommended to go on the boat tour through the green houses. That back fired when my brother realized it started off by going through a large dark tunnel (and resumed screaming). This caused the tour guide to have to wait until he calmed down and wound up giving him an emergency flash light after hearing the whole ordeal. {{Lampshaded}} in the fact that his older sister pointed out that the trick behind the giant sneezing dog in the initial ride was "just water." Also Lampshaded when, after explaining the story to the boat operator, my father finished by adding "... He also doesn't like to eat his vegetables." Later in his life, my brother began a habit of taking the front seat of any and all ride vehicles that go into any dark tunnels or seemingly scary moments and begins to scream like Homer Simpson. On more than a few occasions, his over the top terror has alleviated many

a child on the verge of tears. * Space Mountain. A fairly tame roller coaster, except it's ''almost completely dark''. This troper rather enjoyed the ride, but had to deal with bruises from her sister freaking out. ** Once our family went to DisneyWorld on 4-day vacation and we all, including my little sister, went on the ride. We all enjoyed it and decided to go back on our last day there to ride it again. We found out then that my sister was well under the height requirement and should never have been allowed on the ride in the first place. Freaked my mom right the hell out. ** On the flip side of the coin, Space Mountain is the ''only'' rollercoaster [[FreezairForALimitedTime this troper]] can ride without having a fit, precisely ''because'' she can't see how fast she's going. ** And on the other-other flip side, Space Mountain with the lights on is one of the scariest things you will ever experience thanks to the fact that you can SEE all the scaffolding when the lights are flicked on. This troper enjoys the ride, but knowing how close the scaffolding is to the cars makes her unduly happy to have survived without losing any limbs after getting off. *** Hell, you can see the scaffolding with the lights ''off'!' This troper spent the entire ride feeling like she was about to get decapitated even though she sat in the back. Raise your hands going down the hill? No f** king thanks. **** Only sometimes. Although one version has glow-in-the-dark tape everywhere, which kept this troper's hands firmly in her lap. *** This troper was sad when she could see the track in front of her, but it didn't really matter, because there was only about five seconds when her eyes weren't closed. ** And of course, now we got the Ghost Galaxy overlay at Disneyland for Halloween. Where you travel into a haunted sector of space and are pursued by a fiery looking skeletal ghost, constantly roaring and jumping out. Even the exterior gets into the act at night with special lighting shows ranging from the building shaking and being dented from the inside to collapsing entirely (though being rebuilt with a nifty TronLines effect.) ** This long-haired troper spent the entire ride terrified that her hair was going to get caught on something and ripped out of her head, because there was just enough light to see the presence of supports but not quite enough light to be able to accurately judge how far from the track they were. ** Me and my thrill-seeking family went on Space Mountain one year. We were all doing fine until I hear my sister (who, mind you, is two years older than me) starts screaming at the top of her lungs as if something ripped her open. We found out later that she just lost her glasses on the ride, but ''damn.'' * Is there no nightmare love for the original ''Pirates of the Caribbean'' ride? This troper spent the first half of the ride hiding in a Mickey Mouse baseball cap from the skeletons, storms, and loud, frightening noises...and of course it broke down in the middle of the "pirate brawl", about when she was reaching critical mass. It probably didn't take more than fifteen minutes for them to turn the sound off

and lights on, and another to get the ride moving again, but said troper has the moment branded as an eternity in her mind, staring bleakly at a pirate endlessly chasing a whore in and out of a set of doors, trying to keep from melting down completely. She shudders to think how worse the updated pirates must be now. ** If it's any comfort, this troper has gone on the updated ride several times, and most of the ride isn't updated - they just added new stuff. (Jack Sparrow actually looks a bit out of place next to the rest of the pirates, who are a bit crude by comparison.) ** Despite the fact This Troper rode this ride twice in one Disneyland visit, she became scared of pirates for a little while when she was little thanks to this ride. She was riding this ride with her parents during a clandestine day trip to Disneyland (I live in SoCal, so a day trip to Disneyland is possible for me), when the ride stopped for what seemed like forever. It just happened to stop at the parts when the pirates are pillaging and burning the town, but after the pirate chased the wench. Said troper became afraid for a while that pirates were going to burn and pillage her house, and this was years (possibly a decade) before she became a fan of {{One Piece}}. ** [[{{Regiment}} This troper]] was scared of the skeletons in the beginning, especially the one standing at the wheel of a long-ruined ship. They've changed the ride recently, adding a ''phenomenal'' water-screen on which is projected the ghastly face of Davy Jones. The new Johnny Depp pirates are also a bit too NightmareValley. *** The bit with Davy Jones loses its touch when the riders begin to blow at it or wave their hands to disperse the mist and cause his face to go poof. Admittedly ThisTroper is guilty of that, but it's so very hard to resist. ** This troper has seen footage of [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bTQ5eWBlApY Mr. Depp himself meeting the animatronic]] - he jumps back several times as if it might bite him. We're not the only ones creeped out here. ** Wowzers! That 'Jack Sparrow' animatronic looks like the Real Deal! *** And it's kind of like a cobra, you might never know where he is going to pop-up. ** That drop-off into the water in the dark at the beginning of the ride frightened this troper when he was 4. Seeing the pirates did calm him a bit, though. *** The drop wasn't bad for this troper. The talking skull right before it, which intoned things like "Dead men tell no tales," on the other hand? Gaaaah. *** That was the first thing that scared this troper when she went on the ride at the age of 4. By the time we were at the pirate boats in battle, I was screaming "I wanna go home!" Years later, this troper went on it again. Now in 6th grade, seeing what I was scared didn't scare me at all. ** This troper was terrified that the pirates in this ride were real. When she found out they weren't, she loved it. ** This troper has always been subconsciously unnerved by one of the pirates in the arsenal scene near the end of the ride. This particular pirate is leaning against a cargo winch and sways up and down, waving his pistol around. Somehow, this troper's boat always manages to pause

before this pirate before ascending the lift, and that pirate, more often than not, point his pistol right at him and fires. This troper does not like the idea of getting shot at by a drunken seafarer, and ''every time'' never fails to get plugged right in the head by an imaginary bullet. ** For this troper that most unnerving part of Pirates of the Caribbean is the terrifyingly calm waters BEFORE the drop with the creepy old house built above the water and, if memory serves which it may not, a terrifying pair of alligator eyes peeking at you in the darkness from under the water *** This troper was seven when her parents took her to the MAgic Kingdom in Florida. As a native Floridian, she grew up with a fear of rivers, creaks, and canals because of the alligators that lived in them. [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel There are many stories.]] And of tipping boats, from Jaws. So, of course, she was forced onto PoTC because "it was fake and harmless". Cue the silent tears and heaving sobs everytime the boat rocked and the drop. THE DROP! I don't even remember the pirates. * [[PollyNim This troper's]] brother freaked out after the drop, which is nothing compared to most of the rides at Disney. Of course, earlier in the day we had gone on Thunder Mountain Railroad, which our mother had misremembered as a slow, peaceful ride. ** Your mother may have been thinking of the ride before it at Disneyland, which WAS a slow mine cart ride through the desert. Just sayin'. * This troper freaked out some people himself when he was younger. After hearing that EPCOT's original plan was to always be "thirty years ahead of its time", he suggested... a charred, radioactive ruin in nuclear winter. Yes, [[NightmareFuelStationAttendant he has problems.]] * The ''Indiana Jones'' ride in Disneyland had me catatonic with terror before the ride even began. It's a shame I wasn't older, because I think I'd love it now. ** "Temple of the Forbidden Eye"? This troper (at the point at which he barely made it over the height requirement) closed his eyes and went into a fetal position at the giant talking skull and didn't move again until the end of the ride. ** This troper doesn't remember which one she went on, but she should have been warned off by the concrete snake that you had to Be This Tall to pass. She thought it was something completely different until the waiting-in-line video started, with that bit about finding that someone on the ride with you had become a skeleton. She doesn't remember the ride itself. All motion and darkness and clutching the arms of the ride with increasingly sweaty hands and other people screaming. ** [[SpamWarrior3000 This troper]] made the very, very huge mistake of taking her then-six-year-old stepdaughter on it. [[{{Understatement}} It didn't end well.]] ** [[KingSonnDeeDoo This Troper]] and her (LXV - Roman numerals, work it out for yourself) father were both terrified on the Paris park's version of the Indiana Jones ride - her due to the immense speed, her father due to the fact that when they went through the loop, his neck

was bending back instead of forwards, and he thought it was going to break. ** The rickety bridge over a chasm with ''real'' fire in it. The rolling rock, followed by a sudden drop into the hallway with the pole-axe dropping statues. And the cobra that suddenly darts towards the car. This troper came off the ride speechless with terror and trembling like a leaf. *** This ride is old, and it shows - it's broken almost every time this troper goes. Which she thanks God for. The ride's terrifying, of course, but it's also very clunky. The headache this troper tends to get takes her mind off the fear. ** This troper (who isn't afraid of this ride) went on several years ago. There's a part where the car pretends to stall, but when said troper and two other friends were on that time, it stalled much longer than usual. Me and my friend were freaking out that another car would hit us from behind at 40-50 mph. Thank god that didn't happen... ** This troper adores the Indiana Jones ride, and rode it five times in a row with her equally adrenaline-driven younger brother. She loves the turns, greets the snake every time... but the one part she always freaks out at is the part where your car pauses in a hallway and little jets of compressed air (to simulate arrows) are fired at you. She's done enough archery and seen enough films to know the sound of an arrow travelling at high speed, and the -feeling- of compressed air on the back of her neck was enough to make her yelp and twitch while praying for the car to get moving again, QUICKLY. ** This troper went at age around 6, and was barely tall enough to go on. It was absolutely terrifying. The snake was absolutely terrifying, and this troper was on the right hand side, the one with the snake. At that time, this troper also thought that the animatronic people were real... Really want to ride it again, though. The door was perhaps the creepiest part of all, however. glowing red eyes, ethereal ominous voice... A six year old seriously thinks that they're cursed, or something. ** [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uXfVReYTbXI This.]] <--Watch the (recreated) ride. * Nobody's said anything about the Expedition: Everest ride? This troper loved it, but between the various warnings about the yeti, the twisted and ruined bit of track you come to, GOING ''BACKWARDS'' THROUGH THE MOUNTAIN IN THE DARK, and the ''extremely convincing'' animatronic [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-nFc2zXVCI=related yeti]] that takes an equally convincing swipe at you as your train swerves wildly away? The only reason this troper wasn't ''terrified'' was because she'd looked up a review with a detailed description of what to expect beforehand, so she'd be prepared. ** For [[Tropers/{{Animenutcase}} this troper]], it wasn't the yeti's silhouette (and, oddly enough, she never saw the animatronic yeti) or the darkness that bothered her the most, no, it was the violent speed that frightened her the most. She didn't scream (mostly because she was too scared to, but that's par the course for her and roller coasters) at one point, she actually started ''praying''. She was still shaking a few minutes after getting off. And of course, her

mother hadn't gone on it with her and wanted to go on it later, so she had to go on it AGAIN. Oddly enough, she looks even more frightened in the second photo than the first. Even more oddly, the Haunted Mansion, the one ride that she was SURE would scare her after reading about it here and watching YouTube clips? Did nothing, despite the fact that I got stuck near the Bride. ** This troper saw a History Channel special beforehand that mentioned you "glimpsed the yeti three times." She assumed you caught signs of it - footprints, claw marks, maybe a shadow - and was looking very close at the ride detail through the whole thing. Lots of growls, yes...oooh, there's a good shado- [[DidntSeeThatComing HOLY CRAP 20 FOOT ANIMATRONIC YETI SCREAMING AT ME AND TRYING TO GRAB MY TRAIN!]] ** This troper managed not to be ''too'' scared; she kept her eyes open for most of the ride (though she missed seeing the full-size yeti). But ye gods, the PLUNGING DOWN THE MOUNTAIN. IN THE DARK. FEELING LIKE YOU'RE GOING TO TUMBLE OUT ANY MOMENT. (Me wave my hands in the air like the brave riders do instead of gripping onto the safety handle for dear life? '''Never.''') And her mother was ''absolutely terrified''; the first words out of her mouth once we got back on solid ground were '''"Never again."''' ** This troper was aware of most of the ride's tricks, including the backward section. However she was not prepared for the speed at which the carriage moved backwards and the complete darkness (in hindsight, the darkness was probably for the best). It didn't help that her head shifted off the headrest to the side during it, providing her head with no back support against what felt like enough force to break a neck. Never has a theme park ride filled her with so much terror that she genuinely thought she was going to die. It's also worth noting that in her 18 years of living that is apparently the only time her Dad has ever heard her scream in fear. Funnily enough now that she know what to expect she's fine going back on again, although she still find the force during the backwards section too uncomfortable to ride more than once a visit. *** THIS. As [[Tropers/{{Animenutcase}} this troper]] has already noted, the speed was what really got to me. I was so petrified that I just looked straight the whole time, sparing myself the sight of a giant yeti taking a swipe at our cart. Unlike you, though, I don't think I've gotten better. * [[@/BreakfastFish This troper]] absolutely cannot handle any indoor Disneyland ride with its lights on. (Even the Nightmare Before Christmas overlay for Haunted Mansion makes it too bright in there for my taste, causing me to spend the whole ride staring straight ahead, doing everything I can to not look at anything.) Whenever I'm on a ride that stops moving for ANY reason I bury my face in my hands until it starts again. Luckily I've never been on a ride when it's broken down to the point of evacuation; I'm pretty sure if that happens a cast member will have to carry me out because I know I won't open my eyes for it. ** No no, I get you on that one. For some reason, it's much more paletable for [[NaturallyFromParis this troper]] to accept fantastic worlds where pirates do battle in 18th century seaside villages or taking a stroll through a haunted mansion rather than see all the

mechanics behind them. I turned around and looked behind me on ''Pirates'' once; never again. I don't think I'd be able to walk through it with the lights on, either. * Four words: [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reedy_Creek_Improvement_District Reedy Creek Improvement District]]. Knowing that Disney has what amounts to ''governmental authority'' at Walt Disney World freaks this troper out far more than any ride. Seriously. They're a real life MegaCorp. ** This Troper finds it comforting in a PeaceAndLoveIncorporated kind of way. Their on-site emergency services are able to get to people in need far faster than Orlando public services (which are located far away.) * This troper was completely terrified of the dragon prop as she is revealed in the show Fantasmic. Not only is she very creepily revealed to have appeared there from behind a curtain of smoke but she is also menacingly laughing! ** Ah, well, wait until get to see [[TheRemake the new one]]! (California only) *** Ironically they also originally wanted to have a whole ride dedicated to the villains of Disney movies- it was to be called Villain Mountain. *** [[WildMassGuessing WMG rumours]] have been batted around about a whole villain ''park'' called Night Kingdom. Certainly not true or even remotely feasible (even confirmed false by WordOfGod) but can you imagine if it ''happened?'' The nightmares born daily would traumatize the entire next generation! **** No, Night Kingdom was just a plan for essentially a nocturnal animal version of Animal Kingdom along the size of Sea World's Discovery Cove. Nothing to do with the Villains. ** This troper was honestly more terrified by the [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PJJxDR8pRjM Pink Elephants on Parade]] bit. Besides the images and the driving music, suddenly seeing a bunch of neon elephant faces appear and dance on the dark shore of the island freaked him out! * I freaked out when I visited Magic Kingdom and saw the Snow White and Dopey ''shrubs''. Not to mention all the Mickey Mouse ones that were around. When they start walking around with their scary plant limbs, I'm so coming after them with a flamethrower and a bucket of "I told you so, dammit!" * This troper calls this vid [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kUOiLOP7Mg&feature=channel_page "The Nightmare Fuel Before Christmas"]]. ** IT'S THE [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=944cPciNkw&feature=related PINK ELEPAHNT]] SONG! RUN!!!! * Cranium Command. This troper was six and going through a [[AIIsACrapshoot fear-of-machines]] phase (thanks, [[TheBraveLittleToaster Brave Little Toaster]]). To her mind, it sounded like the body was robotic and one of the orders was not to eat or drink anything - and she knew that robots and food don't mix well. The pilot kid got distracted by some hot chick and had the body eat a salad (Me: "uh oh, not supposed to do that, bad, very bad-"). So when alarm klaxons started going off and the kid started shouting things like "stomach, what are you doing?" she figured the salad had screwed

with the robotics and the body was [[OmnicidalManiac malfunctioning]] [[KillAllHumans beyond]] [[EverythingTryingToKillYou repair]], and she had to be pulled shrieking from the ride. Unfortunately, the entire Wonders of Life pavillion is no longer in opperation so she will never see what was actually going on... ** [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PMFJKjGBgOs Of course seeing it again is no problem thanks to the internet]]. Doesn't stop the ride from being creepy in that it's whole premise is that we are actually all piloted by tiny people inside of our brains that could easily get reassigned into whole other bodies if the DrillSergeantNasty is pissed off enough. * Um, Tower of Terror, people? The premise of it creeped this troper the heck out, especially since she was, y'know, ''staying in a hotel at the time''. Probably would have been literal NightmareFuel if I'd been able to get to sleep that night. ** This troper saw a little window open a couple stories up while being rushed there by her parents. She later realized that it was the view from the top of the fall, and that the rest of the hotel was just intimidation tactics. Still didn't stop her from learning that she apparently covers her ears when scared &^%$less. ** Things one encounters daily breaking down in a deadly fashion - let alone actively trying to kill you - freak this troper out. Tower of Terror was an absolute nightmare that she (at 16 years old) had to do quite a lot of mental negotiations to convince herself to go on. *** The only thing that has stopped this troper from going on the Tower of Terror is the thought if it actually breaks, most people would have no clue. ** This troper's dad has a sadistic sense of humor. When she was six, he convinced her that the ride was exactly like the Frog Hopper (a ride at a local amusement park back home where it takes kids about 15 feet in the air and bounces you up and down). After reluctantly complying, he brought her and snuck along her 3-year-old brother into the line. By the time they entered the Twilight Zone, she and she brother were gripping their father for dear life. Needless to say, her dad bought the picture, got a scolding from her mom when she heard about it (she was sick in the hotel room that day), and this troper and her brother refused to go back until ten years later. ** This troper needs to remember to never go on that ride again. She keeps forgetting that the fall part scares her half to death. She only manages to remember when mostly through the line to get on the ride. ** This troper (who has an immense fear of heights/dropping) was feeling all confident after going on Soarin' Over California... and then she got on this ride. If Soarin brought me 5 steps closer to getting over my fear of heights, Tower of Terror brought me at least 100 steps back. I did think the first ride up (where you see all the cool rooms and stuff) and going into and out of the Twilight Zone were wicked awesome, however. ** Let's face facts: Tower of Terror is ''[[PrecisionFStrike fucking sadistic.]]'' It's random, it has a "Got You" drop that psyches you out, it's inspired by the Twilight Zone...oh, did I mention that it's '''random'''? The end result of all this? You will be on the edge of [[BringMyBrownPants pants-wetting terror]] the whole time.

*** That's nothing. The elevator does not freefall. It's on a system that actually pulls the car down so that it's moving down faster than freefall. It was designed this way ''specifically'' to mess with your body's senses. ** This troper originally didn't even get as far as the rest of you. She was quite willing, if a little nervous, to have a go on it at the age of 6. However, the PRE-SHOW VIDEO absolutely terrified her out of riding. In particular when the elevator passengers were electrocuted. As a result she had to take a safe, modern and trustworthy elevator out of there and wait for the rest of her family to finish riding. Over a decade later she has actually had multiple rides on it since and it has now become a personal favorite. Tower of Terror I'm sorry I ever doubted you. ** This troper has been on the Tower of Terror ONCE, and only once (family rule is that you try each ride once. If you don't like it, you don't have to go back). She flat-out refused to scream, so now there is a lovely picture of her with her eyes closed and her teeth clenched to hold back the nausea/screaming. ** Aside from the surprisingly disturbing pre-show, there are the piles of Twilight Zone memorabilia at the end of the ride. Which is kind of cool, unless you happen to be sitting at the edge of the car, and when you turn your head there's a ventriloquist dummy grinning at you from less than a foot away. This troper may have screamed. ** [[@/{{Tadaru}} This troper]] rode Tower of Terror yesterday at Tokyo Disney Sea. He knew what the ride was, but his friends just thought it was a haunted house (this version of it doesn't have a Twilight Zone theme), so they didn't know why he was freaking out so badly. Once he got to the actual part of the ride, it shouldn't be hard to guess [[OhCrap his reaction when they showed just how high up everyone was]]. He was still shaking even after the ride was over. His facial expression was a mix of horror and pain. Here's how much it broke his self-confidence: He was scared of Raging Spirits (a pretty wimpy ride), even though he had ridden ''Fujiyama'' only six months ago. * Rides breaking down. This troper has acquired what seems to be a crippling fear of things breaking down and killing her, which makes theme parks in general inordinately paranoia-inducing. * Indiana Jones Adventure. This troper was nearly thrown out of the car by all the violent turns. The only reason I wasn't is because I was strapped in. Never, ever again. * shudder* ** Ah, and yet, after the initial year or so they actually toned down this motion! The vehicle's turns are actually quite smooth, but the car itself is strapped with a hydraulic machine that knocks everybody around. The lifts are all at the corners, and the right rear seat is particularly nasty. * The It's Tough to Be a Bug show in Animal Kingdom, particularly for this animal-savvy troper. Spraying bombardier beetles (which normally spray acidic fluid!), wasps and other nasty insects... Not to mention the horrible feeling of something squirming under your bum at the end of the show! That last one made the troper screech in surprise and LEAP to her feet while hyperventilating... She will never live it down.

** This troper is absolutely terrified of Black Widow spiders, the very same kind that drop from the ceiling in that show. Seeing Four foot nightmares that have haunted your dreams since childhood suddenly falling from the ceiling like black promises of death and dismemberment... this troper's mother originally thought that this troper was playing along. I have never gone back on that ride, and maybe never will. * This troper went to Disneyland with her family in the mid-90s, and has never forgotten the day the little in-park shuttle broke down. Not sure what this one was called, but it operated much like an open-top version of the monorail, zipping tourists from place to place on a track, usually two stories up. No idea if this was orders from higher up or their own bright idea, but when the ride ground to a halt above the park and couldn't be moved, the driver told everyone to climb out and ''walk'' to the nearest station. That's right - all the tourists walking along the narrow track to the (mercifully close) platform with no safety gear and nothing but concrete below. ** This is the Disneyland PeopleMover, which broke down frequently thanks to it's reliance on spinning tires from it's sponsor, (Go Go Go) Goodyear. All it takes is for one motor propelling the tires to break down and everybody has to walk the complete length either forwards or backwards to the station. Some smarter families refused to ride at night. Florida also has such a ride, but propelled with Linear Induction so that there's no moving parts to break down. * This troper went to WDW once when she was, oh, ten. Worth noting, I despise loud noises. Avoided most of the scary stuff (We didn't go to Animal Kingdom, and Alien was both closed and OBVIOUSLY out of my range- So was the HAUNTED MANSION, for cryin' out loud), but the Enchanted Tiki Room... I went in expecting happy singing birds, instead I got the FREAKING VOLCANO GODS YELLING AT ME... and don't the seats shake, too? Gee, thanks, Disney. * This troper (same one who posted the Tower of Terror one that involved her massive fear of heights) went on Spaceship Earth in Epcot. What a wondeful, peaceful, intriguing ride! The steep ascent at the beginning was a bit fear-inducing and misleading but -[[ClusterFBomb OH MY GOD WHY THE HELL ARE WE MOVING BACKWARDS? WHY THE HELL ARE WE GOING DOWN A STEEP DESCENT BACKWARDS?!]] Oh good, it stopped -- [[AtomicFBomb OH MY FUCKING GOD NOT AGAIN!]] Cue this (then 13-year-old) troper holding on to the seat/her grandmother's hand and attempting to do the whole "build a future" thing. Oh god, it was terrifying. * [[{{Penzy}} This Troper]] was a wee 6 years old when her Mother and Father took her to Disney land. Her very sadistically humored father DRAGGED her into the haunted mansion. And then left her on one of the seats. ALONE. Besides her Mom's purse. It was okay, besides the coffins that rattled and the bones that appeared everywhere. And then came those god awful mirrors. The chairs turn and you see yourself, and a '''GHOSTLY VISITOR OCCUPYING THE SPACE NEXT TO YOU''' Of course, I saw a rotting gentleman in the mirror. Cue her laying down on top of the purse and crying.Oh, and the next 5 days there was a hurricane (Charlie, I believe?) HORRIBLE. One of the beams on the hotel snapped, we almost died. Everything was closed, we couldn't leave the

apartment. Good thing my ''amazing'' father brought a big thing of balogna. Everytime this troper looks at Bologna, she cries a little inside. * During this troper's trip to Disney World, he and his parents went on the Tower of Terror ride while his scared sister decided to wait in the gift shop. His mom asked the attendant if they'd be able to find her easily when they got back. The attendant replied, completely incharacter, "if you get back", with a creepy smile on his face. * When I was 11, my parents and I went on the Indiana Jones Adventure. If I remember right, it involved sitting in a Jeep as it violently bounced at high speed through a jungle. I couldn't open my eyes, and was in tears by the end... much to my parents' embarrassment.

NightmareFuelRealLife * [[{{Tropers/HimeTakamura}} This Troper]]'s late aunt had a cat she loved very much. when the cat, Miss Kitty, passed, Auntie decided to get it stuffed. However, the taxidermist didn't have any frames for house cats. So, Auntie settles for a bobcat. They aren't the same. What came as a result was a horrible abomination of a dead house cat with the shape of a bobcat. Auntie loved it, but as a young child around 10 or 12, this troper was terrified. She insisted her aunt hide the cat in the closet whenever she spent the night. * In my House, when you open the cutlery draw really hard, all the cutlery rattles, one night this Troper woke up at 3AM and was lying there trying to get back to sleep when I suddenly heared the cutlery draw open. I lyed there thinking it was a burgler or something. Eventually I fell asleep and when I woke up all the stuff was there, I asked my Mum, Dad and Brothers if they were up at around 3AM, none of the were. To thi day I still have no idea what the hell that was. ** Hmm... It could possibly be a vivid dream. If you wake up, something bad happens, and then fall back asleep, you can wake up, thinking the dream was real. * When this troper was around 11, he was searching optical illusions on the internet. One website was a joke, and when you got to the third illusion, ''a picture of a screaming weasel popped up'' complete with a deafening scream. This troper is still tramatized by the image years later. ** I'm going to hell for laughing at that, aren't I? ** (OP) No, if I saw it now, I'd probably think it was funny too, but 5 years ago it was a monster. * Around Freshman year of high school, [[KaelSeoras this troper]]'s daydreams were often occupied by thoughts of the end-of-existence aspect of death and the eternity aspect of afterlife (I was grappling with the question of whether death was the end or whether there was an afterlife). With the former, I made a serious effort to wrap my mind around the concept of just...not being. No thoughts, nothing. Along with kind of breaking my brain, it freaked me the hell out. With the latter, I was daydreaming about Heaven specifically, and trying to wrap my mind around the idea of being there forever. No end. Always existence. No end EVER. Kind of broke my brain and also freaked me out (that it was Heaven I was thinking about didn't matter, the ideaeen

fades to black, creepy music starts playing, and then you see what this troper assumes is the train station announcing of never ending was just...too much). Eventually I just told myself not to think about it anymore; it was serving no practical purpose and only depressing/scaring me. * Many young kids were afraid of the deep end of the pool, for many different reasons. For [[DiscoGlacier this troper]], it was the [[MeaningfulName Kreepy Krauly]] pool cleaner that lurked on the bottom of the pool, chugging away for things that have settled on the bottom, be it dust or small children. Lord knows what would've happened had I touched the ominous machine or its cord. ''[[HellIsThatNoise *ticka ticka ticka ticka*]]'' * This troper's dad saw "shadow people" in his childhood home during his youth. The first night he saw them, he had to sleep in the family room with his brother, as his parents' friends were staying in his bedroom. In the middle of the night, he heard a limping noise walking back and forth the walkway in front of the living room. When he looked out the window facing it, he saw the silhouette ''peeking into the window at him''. Another instance, the same figure was watching him ''from the closet'', and last appeared peeking around his bedroom door. This is why this troper keeps his doors closed at night. ** [[PrincessAndTheFrog Bombombombombombombombom...]] ** Your dad saw the "shadow people" too? Once at my house, ''many'' years gone, I saw some for a whole summer. It ended with my bed getting moved in the hopes that it would cure my 'bad dreams'. So that night... I suddenly wake up and the closed door SLAMS open, with two of the shadow people reaching in ''right where my bed had been until a few hours ago''. I get ths feeling of baffled rage, and the door SLAMS shut again. A few moments later it opens again, and my mother tells me to stop slamming the door because she and dad are trying to sleep. ** This troper also saw these as a child, simply referring to them as 'nasty shadows'. They were distinctly human shaped and crept along the walls menacingly. My parents eventually had to send me to sleep at my nan's house because I couldn't sleep in my room. Though I've never been religious in any way, my nan was a devout Christian, and assured me that if I slept wearing her cross necklace, it would scare them away. Maybe it was placebo, but after she gave me that cross, I was never troubled by them again. I'm almost completely convinced that the 'weird weeks' of my youth were all a dream -- but if so, then ''how did that door slam?'' *** I was at a sleepover. I was sleeping on the couch. In the corner i swear i saw a shadow a shadow.shaped like a person.it still scare me to death. i'm not sure was it a bunch of objects casting the shadow...or was it a ghost? ** This troper saw them as well -- first, the steady footsteps that almost sound like a heartbeat. Then the Shadow Man in the door. "My" shadow man never did anything else... just stood there in the door. But I knew that if I got out of bed, Something Bad would happen. *** This troper has had similar ghostly experiences. Sometimes, randomly, in the house, I'll get the feeling someone is watching me. The temperature drops, my hair stands on end. The dog looks up. Sometimes, the dog, in the middle of the day, barks at absolutely

nothing outside. Then there was the time, I am only half way sure it was a dream, but when I was about ten, I saw a man by my bed. Standing tall, he shadowed over me. He had this ''humongous'' grin, was big, and looked like [[DGrayMan The Earl]]. He whispered to me, "Hello there, little one. You miss Nathan, right?" Oh the ''grin''... ** This troper recalls seeing a silhouette standing in his window a few times, moving around strangely, almost as if putting on a show. However, he's not 100% sure it wasn't just a family member (or stranger?) outside. ** my bro had a similar ghost exprience a ghost standing on his bed it was my poppy he said "hello" then his name ** Oh, they were just [[AlanWake taken by the Dark Presence.]] Stick a flashlight in their face, [[OrIsIt you'll be fine.]] ** This Troper woke up with a shadow person ''in his FACE''... Bricks were shat that night... * When I was about 8, my family went on a cruise. There was a program for children, and part of it included an unsupervised scavenger hunt of the whole ship. We split into tiny teams and my team got onto the elevator. There was an old lady with a cane in there, and due to the small size of the elevator, I was forced to stand right next to her. As we were descending, the old lady grabbed my hand, looked at me, and said, "Do you want to travel through time?" Her voice was raspy and her grip was vice-like. The elevator doors opened and my team went running ahead without me. I almsot said "Yes" to the lady because I feel the need to please people. But I had to rip my hand from hers and start jogging out before I got trapped in the elevator with her. I gave a quick "Sorry!" and as I ran out, I felt terrified and yet still guilty for being rude to the lady. I would have disregarded this incident as some senile old lady talking, but the look in her eye was so serious and she held onto my hand so tightly I thought I would never be free. Sometimes I still think, although I berate myself for being stupid every time, what if she wasn't just senile? What if she was the real fucking deal? What would have happened to me if I hadn't torn away the moment that I did? * The sound of an alarm clock scares me. Not all alarm clocks, just the ones that go on in the same BEEP BEEP BEEP that makes it sound like some emergency. Thankfully, I don't have one of those alarm clocks, but I used to. And since alarm clocks keep going on and on until you turn them off, it sounds to me as if with each BEEP it becomes more urgent and I fumble and flail to turn the thing off. When I thought I escaped the noise when I bought a new alarm clock, I started playing Little Big Planet. Before every race, the BEEP BEEP BEEP of an alarm clock plays and it scares the shit out of me, as if if I don't complete the race fast enough, some emergency is going to happen. Why, LBP, WHY?????? * My mom lived in front of a freaking graveyard when she was little. And not one of those well-tended, oft-visited cemeteries, either- this one hadn't had a new burial since ''The Civil War''. Needless to say, she had a lot of sleepless nights. * I was a surprisingly brave child, and even to this day I'm fairly hard to scare. There are about 5 things I can think of that really scare me: Extremely strong winds, screaming, moaning, abandoned

buildings (but only at night), and paralysis. In case you haven't guessed yet, ''every single one of these phobias'' was caused by that god damned Hyrule Castle Town in ''TheLegendOfZelda: Ocarina of Time''. * This troper uses the [[http://www.getaclue.com/ Get a Clue program]] for school, and if you guess incorrectly on certain questions, your speakers will emit a ScareChord of the highest caliber. This troper has never been so motivated to be correct. * Okay seriously ''what is [[http://i20.tinypic.com/18d476.jpg this]]''? Who thought that was a good idea?? ** This troper does not want to click, but is very, very curious. What is it? ** Think Easter Bunny turned serial mass murderer, with a child in its lap. ** This Troper was so terrified of the Easter Bunny as a child. My kindy thought it would be a good idea for him to pay us a visit and as soon as I saw the huge footprints of flour he had left on the floor...my imagination may have got the best of me [[http://www.fugly.com/media/IMAGES/Random/scary_easter_bunny.jpg]] Yeah...He had to leave the eggs outside until I was nine. *** That looked like the Easter Bunny as created by [[PowerRangers Lord Zed]]. That considered, that would actually make the monster ''worse''. ** That picture's pretty much like the picture for NightmareFuel, only the bunny doesn't look like an angry cyborg. * This Troper used to be terrified (and still is somewhat unsettled) by a rather small hallway in the [[http://naturalsciences.org/ North Carolina Museum of Natural Sciences.]] It was a model ocean behind glass walls with realistic prehistoric sea-creature figures (lifesized, too, I'm pretty sure) and eerie blue lighting. To this day, I cannot explain why I found myself running through the hall covering my eyes with my hands as a young child. ** This Troper has been there many times, and knows exactly what you're talking about. It's not the figures that scare me. It's ''the freakin' ''{{Megalodon}}'' painted in the background.'' Coupled with the dark atmosphere... Besides that, the museum has a similar section for modern-day deep sea (not a tunnel though, thank God.) There, they have some big, unholy wormlike models eating a shark carcass. ** I recently visited the museum. The previously mentioned places were scary, but the worst for me was the hallway where you have to walk ''directly'' under a real blue whale skeleton. In addition, the path was designed so that you turn a corner and then all of a sudden, you've got a 20-or-so foot long skull ''staring directly down at you''. ** This Troper is still unnerved by the Museum of Natural History in New York City. The undersea part where there's a large (maybe even life-sized) model of an octopus attacking a whale. The model is purposely dark to appear under the sea, and the room itself is dark. I would be able to get past that if it weren't for the gargantuan model of a blue whale in the same (or nearby) room. It's immense, and you come face to face with the thing when you walk into the room. It's suspended in the air by cords, and if I remember correctly, you can

walk ''under'' it. Cue phobia of being alone in a wide expanse of ocean, and seeing a giant shadow pass beneath the tiny rowboat you're in. It's odd that I love the Cthulhu Mythos, and the thought of all the inevitably large, toothy, malevolent beasties lurking at the bottom of the ocean is one of the last things that can get this Troper to visibly shudder. * When [[Tropers/MassaWhore this troper]] was a little kid, she saw a sign at a local pool that said something like 'keep track of your children'- you know, your typical don't-let-your-kids drown type thing. Under that, though, was a list of things parents should be careful of. One of the 'tips' was 'don't let your children swim with strangers'. In retrospect that's kind of a...strange thing to have written there, but I was in my paranoid-about-kidnapping phase, and I was suddenly terrified that some strange man was going to invite me to go swimming and then kidnap me. I had nightmares about it, even. Years later I found this hilarious...until I played AceAttorney. THAT SIGN WAS WARNING ME AWAY FROM GANT, I SWEAR TO GOD. * This troper was eating his dinner staring out the window when suddenly a large fireball appeared in the sky and came crashing down in the general direction of the ocean. Before it landed behind the skyline he alerted his mother who called the coast guard while frantically screaming for the news to be put on. No flares had been reported and it seemed that it was just two people who had noticed the fireball. When this troper called his grandmother he found out that she had seen the very same thing around twenty years prior. To this day the fireball has never been fully explained to me. ** That one sounds an awful lot like a BigLippedAlligatorMoment to [[Tropers/ThisIsATest me]]. ** It was probably just a meteor. ** Yeah, and so was [[http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/8550504.stm this]]. * My friend and I decided to go to our (really old) school on the weekend. We got in because her dad works there. I swore I heard something in the chapel pews that wasn't us, and those pictures eyes really do look like they're moving. Yes, I did have a nightmare... * While at Space Camp, this troper's group got to listen to a speaker who worked at Air Force Space Command. He was a seriously freaky StepfordSmiler, even when he talked about the space shuttle's Range Destruct Safety System that would be used to blow it up if something went wrong. He knew the guy whose job it would be to push that button. With all the astronauts still on board. And while he was telling us about this, he was SMILING. Genuinely SMILING. * This Troper's family is the full-on source for Nightmare Fuel, both normal and High Octane. For example, don't ''ever'' ask your grandparents to tell you ghost stories. Especially if they come from the Backwater of Jamaica. I present to you the story of Trenchcoat Man (more appropriately, Lightpost Man, but Trenchcoat Man is scarier. My grandfather was walking along a road in Jamaica, with a lightpost only every 40 feet or so, resulting in about 5 feet between each lightpost (10 if you're going around a corner) where there's nothing but pitch freaking black. So after he comes through one of these, guy just magically appears walking next to him. This guy is just there in a trenchcoat, buttoned up, with a cigarette in his mouth. Plus, he

smelled like matches. He asks my grandfather for a light. My grandfather had just quit smoking, and didn't have a lighter. But Trenchcoat Man keeps bugging him, and my grandfather just gets angry and says (loosely translated from Jamaican Patois) "Only three kinds of people walk at night: Cops, criminals, and ghosts. I'm one of them (he was a cop). What are you?" Trenchcoat man just laughs at him. Then the cigarette lights by itself and starts to burn away, ''while Trenchcoat Man does the same'', burning away until he was just a trenchcoat and disembodied lips and teeth, still laughing maniacally. My grandfather runs like hell, stops at a house he had passed a half mile back. The dogs don't bother him, and an old lady is sitting on the porch, with salt in her hand (Old wives' tale: ghosts apparently hate salt}, which she jams into his mouth. Before I continue, I will note several things: The old lady was sitting up ''waiting'' for someone to run to her house, and the dogs had obviously had this happen tons of times. So then the old lady tells Gramps a story about a guy who was putting up lightposts and suffered a bizzare accident that apparently left only enough pieces that they had to wrap him up in a trenchcoat and cremate him. So after my grandfather recovers, he realizes that he has to go ''past'' Trenchcoat Man again. Luckily, he passes by without a problem. As he gets to the town part, where there are street lights everywhere, he looks back, and sees this figure in a trenchcoat, a hundred feet back, tall as a lightpost, smiling at him. ** This Tropers great grandfather was an english imigrant.So her "Grammy" tells her old english tales.One of wich was a story about a little girl going to the bakery to buy cakes...she gets murderd by the nutjob owning the bakery. ** [[NightmareFetishist He sounds like a fun ghost.]] Does he have a real name, or should I just call him Trenchcoat Man? * High school pep rallies. Small spaces don't bother me. Loud noises don't bother me. But put me in a bleacher with people surrounding me from every angle, many pressed up close to me, and I get claustrophobic. Add screaming, stomping, and loud music, and I wish I could be in a small, solitary soundproof room with a mega-large bottle of any type of over-the-counter headache-reliever. Made worse by the fact I normally don't believe in taking any medicine unless a doctor tells me I literally need to for my health. Thank goodness my college: (1. Doesn't have pep rallies, and (2. Wouldn't be able to make them bloody mandatory if they did. ** This Troper's high school somehow made pep rallies mandatory as well... and supposedly punishes students who miss out that day without prior notice of absence. Fortunately, I go to college full time on the Running Start program, which 1) lets you take college classes while in high school, and 2) coughs up for tuition completely (though you still have to fork over for textbooks...). ** [[{{Dark Lady Celebrian}} This troper]] simply cannot sit through them. Normally I take a day off of school on days when I know there is going to be a pep rally, but I couldn't on the day of the fall pep rally due to the Homecoming Dance being the next day. (If you were absent on the day before, you couldn't go.) After about 15 minutes I was about to pass out, and finally nudged a student next to me and begged them to go find a teacher, who later took me to the nurse where

I sat until the pep rally was over. ** To quote ''{{Daria}}'' and Jane, "Pep rally week? Guess it's time to make alternate plans." "Hello Mr. Roof." ** The marching/pep band storming through my school's hallways on certain mornings (HellIsThatNoise) initially terrified me, but I later got used to it. * When he was young, this troper used to eat often at a Mexican restaurant. In the men's bathroom of the restaurant, there was a painting of a morbidly obese orange cat directly opposite the toilet. This cat had eyes that would STEAL YOUR SOUL while you crapped. Scariest thing from my childhood. ** Speaking of cats in bathrooms; This one's father put a very weird painting of a cat with a woman's body in my childhood home's bathroom. Every time I looked at her/it she was saying to me "yeah, go ahead and pee kid, have a bath, wash your hands, because whenever you do, I'LL BE WATCHING YOU.". Everyone hated that painting apart from my father of course. Oh and does anyone know that painting [[http://www.ibiblio.org/wm/paint/auth/hals/laughing.jpg 'The Laughing Cavalier']]? Yeah, he hung that right above the bloody kitchen. I had to run past it every time. Creepy... paedophile eyes... dammit... ** What is it with cat paintings, bathrooms, and NightmareFuel? One of my friends, who otherwise loved cats and paintings of them, had this one cat painting in his bathroom that he absolutely ''hated''; there was just something... ''[[UncannyValley off]]'' about it. The thing absolutely hypnotized him every time he went to the bathroom, so much that he eventually noticed that its artist's name - which was signed in one of the corners of the picture - was [[PunnyName nearly homophonic with]] "I'm waiting at the gorge." We figured this had to have been some kind of [[GoodbyeCruelWorld suicide note]] on part of the messed-up painter, maybe [[InterruptedSuicide a plea for someone to stop him before he jumped off of whatever gorge he was talking about]]. By the time my friend actually showed me the painting, though, the artist's name had somehow changed... My friend very well could've been pulling my leg, but he seemed to genuinely think the picture was haunted. ** If we're on the subject of paintings and bathrooms, this troper should add that once, when sleeping over at a friend's house and using the bathroom to brush his teeth, spied a painting on the wall of a young boy kissing a young girl, whose eyes seemed to stare directly at you. Recently, this troper's found it's called "First Love" by some old lady called Margaret Kane, but sadly all the google image thumbnails don't surmount to being right in front of that picture, with all of it's texture and realism staring you right in the face, seeming to let you get lost in those alien-like, full, dark, pupileyes of the little girl, with that emotionless expression staring ''directly into your soul.'' * This is going to sound stupid, but this troper and her sister once went to this camp. It was this stereotypical looking camp with a bunch of cute little cabins, a hiking trail, a tetherball pole, a cafeteria, and a canoe lake. Maybe this troper and her sister have overactive imaginations, but it was a little too stereotypical. We spent the entire time expecting some horror movie-like event. And thus the

dangers of being too GenreSavvy... * This troper has a friend in Cyprus. He has actually seen pictures of this...but there are plenty of old ladies who are widows or spinsters...and they dress like the grim reaper. Even if he were in Cyprus, he'd be freaked seeing a zillion grim Reapers walking down the street. * This troper's cousin prank-called her during the wee hours of the morning using a service that has a ''[[CreepyMonotone poorlysynthesized voice]]'' speak the message. It was not pleasant. * Suspension bridges + high winds = brick shatting. Just driving over one in low wind is nightmare fuel enough for this Troper. Picking a college that she has to cross the longest suspension bridge in the US to get to (unless she wants to add an additional 8 hours to her round trip) was probably not the best idea. Witness [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ASd0t3n8Bnc Galloping Gertie.]] ** This Michigan-native troper agrees wholeheartedly. We had to cross the Mackinac Bridge twice (round trip) on a family vacation to Sault Ste. Marie as a kid. The infamous "Yugo flight testing" incident had happened approximately two years before; as a result, Mom insisted that we roll all the windows down, unlock all doors and remove all seat belts before we got on the bridge. Ostensibly this was to leave us an escape route in the (inevitable, to her) event of going off the bridge. Realizing at age 7 that I had my choice of dying of deceleration trauma, ejection trauma or drowning was quite enough to sour me on bridges until adolescence. * Manholes, stop taps, grids etc. This Troper has actually fallen through one, resulting in a broken ankle. They're all holes in the ground, and the covers aren't anywhere near as sturdy as they look and many are poorly maintained. You have probably stood on thousands of them in your lifetime without realising, and they could collapse under your weight, and you won't even see it coming. ** Thanks. I * really* needed that. </sarcasm> Bastard. ** Think that's scary? I present to you [[http://scpwiki.wikidot.com/scp-731 SCP-731]], the manhole cover that, if walked on while no one else is observing, turns you into a sewer rat. Enter the jibblies. ** This troper found the experiments involving 731 amusing. He nows presents you, the ultimate gift for that little asshole that keeps flushing your car keys down the toilet. [[http://scpwiki.wikidot.com/scp-583 SCP-583]]. Guaranteed to wean him off Sesame Street. * ThisTroper used to live in a basement, with a window basically behind me, a mother obsessed with keeping curtains open 24/7, and friends who often found it easier to figure out if I was home by looking in than by knocking on the front door. Statistically, they pretty much had to have caught me doing something...less than public...at some point. * This troper has had nightmares so scary he couldn't sleep well for days. That's right- nightmares are self-powered now! ** I guess that makes two of us. Production rates up %25! * This troper is terrified of bees ever since he was stung when little. The noise of bees buzzing freaks me out.

** Same with me, and pretty much the same reason (stung when little.) I absolutely hate going outside after the thought of bee's being out there with me. And even despite my fear, I couldn't help but read the article about "The Top 5 Deadliest Insects" on the NightmareFuelAnimals category. For those who share this fear of mine, two of the five insects (including the first one) are bees. (The phobia is called "apiphobia" for those who are interested.) ** [[{{Dark Lady Celebrian}} This troper]] has gotten rid of her fear of all insects except bees. This probably comes from the time a bee kept flying at me at the park one day and I felt its legs brush my nose. I'm hoping the [[{{Nightmare Retardant}} cute plush bee pillow I'm getting for Christmas]] will help kill the fear. ** You must really hate the [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AeXoZur3M-M 2010 World Cup]] then. ** You think being stung by a bee is scary? Try being stuck in a shed for ''half an hour'' while what looked like an ''entire nest'' of wasps is swarming around you, and take off again if you move. [[{{Tropers/Marr965}} This troper]] was fucking terrified. * While this troper, while enjoys dressing in black, speaking about death with a humorous manner, and regularly investigates reported haunted areas in the middle of the night, is completely terrified of moths. Just the way they look, Giant Hairy Flying Cigars with owl eyes etched on their wings is enough to give this troper horrible nightmares. And don't get me started on how much I HATE to see them flying into light bulbs ''repeatedly''. ** Mom? Is that you? ** Omg, that ''sound'' of a fly desperatedly banging itself against window blinds... ''Brrrrrr!'' This troper has little problem with most insects (and has never feared spiders), but ''dead'' insects (or the prospect of a dead insect- see the "moth to a flame" example) ''creeps me the hell out!'' *** A moth once got into my room. I literally stayed awake all night because of the bastard, just watching him fly around and trying to get him out. The noise he makes when his wings hit the celling...it's horrible. It's like a personal Jaws tune. So eventually he flies behind my bed and quiets down. Skip to two weeks later, I'm picking up the notebook that lies on my bedside table, and I see it's got a dead moth on it. The exact same moth. I had been sleeping next to it for two weeks. And now I was faced with the task of getting it's corpse out my room. * When this troper was in first grade, she learned the story of that volcano that erupted in the cornfield in Mexico, and spent the next two years terrified that one was going to erupt in her yard. ** Must be the Paricutn, if it helps for anything nobody in the Paricutn y San Juan Viejo Parangaricutiro(Go ahead, try to pronounce it) died. (EverybodyLives) ** This troper remembers reading a pig photo-filled book on volcanoes during 2nd grade. Although there were pictures of skeletons and the like in there, what ''really'' got to her was this tiny ''drawing'' of a skeleton at the bottom of a page, holding a pair of "XXX" liquor jugs. A little blurb next to the creepy thing explained how many people have died from being so inebriated that they didn't realize

they were walking into a fiery force of nature. It did not help that she was already pretty freaked-out by drugs in general. * This troper's friend has a REAL LIFE {{Yandere}} girlfriend. She often says, "I love you so much I would torture anyone who tries to mess with our love." It was a chilling confrontation with non-cartoony Yandere evil. * This troper remembers reading a book in elementary school on strange and unusual diseases/human conditions; included were such fun things as people whose nightmares were so terrifying that they died in their sleep from heart attacks. The scariest was the chapter on spontaneous human combustion, which stated that people have spontaneously burst into flames and burned to death without any apparent cause. Scarier still was the fact that the only few unburned remains were their legs, arms, or even their ''shriveled skulls''. Of course, there were full page photographs of said remains, including a picture of a pile of ashes with a woman's unattached leg sticking straight out of it. Needless to say, this troper stayed up many nights afraid that one day he, too, would spontaneously burst into flames. ** Glad it's not just me, I couldn't sleep for days after hearing of SHC. Other random incurable conditions scare me too, which is why I can't eat beef. ** You will be glad to hear it is a scientifically impossible urban legend then. Unlike the possibility of a spontaneous eruption of a super volcano that would wipe out humanity. Sleep well! ** I may be mis-interpreting the troper above me, so I apologize ahead of time if this comes off as contrite or anything, but how is it scientifically impossible if -no one can explain- it and it's been fully documented-? Just seems to me that, rather than being a scientifically impossible urban legend, it is in fact a reality that people either discount, or try to debunk it and fail miserably. I am unsure, but I do remember there being a survivor of such an account, and his account of how it happened is pretty chilling to the bone. * I remember one story I heard about one poor little boy . His mother, his aunt, his grandparents, and himself all lived in the same house. He and his mother had to share the same room. He was very afraid of the dark. One night, he couldn't sleep, so he decided to play with his night light. He accidentally pulled it out, pitching the whole room into total darkness. He wanted to put the light back in but couldn't find it. To make matters worse, his mother was snoring and it sounded like an alien wanting to suck his brains out. So he crawled into the fetal position and stayed that way...all...night...long. His mother found him that way in the morning. What's even scarier is the fact that he grew up to be...[[spoiler:ME!]] MWUH HA HA! ** ...[[TheSpoonyExperiment Spoony]]? Izzat you? * When I was but a wee lad, I was absolutely terrified of philodendrons. Yes, I know, it sounds ridiculous, but ''[[http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/d2/Philodendron_bi pinnatifidum.jpg look at them]]'' Their trunks are covered in eyes and tendrils! This was not aided by the fact that there were several of the nasty little critters sitting outside my front door. They don't even look nice. ''WHO WOULD PLANT SUCH AN ABOMONATION? WHO?'' ** ''WHO?'' SATAN.

** Damn, I see what you mean.. They look somewhat like something out a japanese horror movie.. Especially with those eyes... Ugh. * I just got Nightmare Fueled BY THIS VERY WIKI! EarCleaning. Ear Fucking Cleaning. If anyone tried to stick something called an ear pick in [[MaureenMacDonald This Troper]]s ear she would cry with fear. ** Well... It's actually just feel ticklish. Depends on what kind of ear cleaner you're using actually, since there's the ear pick, which described in the main page, or the cotton-one. [[WhamLine Of course, if you're not careful with the ear pick...]] * I have to work with a lot of heavy machinery in my Uni workshop. I have to deal with giant drills, sanders and saws, and all the horror stories that come with them, usually involving losing of fingers. I can use any of the machines quite happily, except ban saws which make me squirm. Weirdly enough, I enjoy using jig saws, the one tool I ever managed to injure myself with. ** I actually made a whole wooden car for my 8th grade shop class using only the belt sander because I was afraid of the band saw. * A fish infection known as "pop eye" (I think). It makes the fish'es eyes fall out of them. [[GreatPikminFan I]] have a fish with it, it's right eye is gone, and it's left eye is swelling. Even worse, when it's right eye fell out, it was sitting there being held by a little tread of about over a day. But the real sad thing is the thought of a fish losing it's sight without even knowing what's going on. ** You think that's bad? This Tropers cat had a kitten, which had an eye infection, resulting in the same thing. Seeing a kitten's eye fall out isn't something one should ever have to see. * When this troper was a kid, he got a copy of the first Diablo game (Hellfire addon) with (almost) all the music and all the speech sound files removed. He loved the game and this "no-music" version was the one he knew for years. Then (with a small hint from a friend and one lucky accident) this troper found a way into the hive. For no apparent reason, the music for the hive (and abyss for that matter) was still there. So he enters the hive and [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RHqkM6k6m3o this]] starts playing. That combined with the first taunt. He was afraid to even enter the nest again, even after level-grinding. It took him a long time to get used to the nest and even more time to the abyss. Now dark ambient is one of his favorite musical styles, Diablo is always played with music and now I find the hive music ''relaxing.'' ** [[Tropers/TacoNinja This one]] delights in making this kind of music. *** Troper that posted the original entry itself here: [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZE3opd1Prw this]] is in better quality with proper stereo. Listen in HQ. * Back when I was 7 or so I woke up in the middle of the night and saw something that scared the hell out of me. Standing by my window was a creature I called "The Pillow-faced Man" due to the fact that his head was the shape of a pillow. For several days this motherfucker entered my room in the middle of the night and stared at me until morning. I finally told my parents and they assured me that there wasn't really an alien creature with a pillow head invading my room at night, but knew a way to stop him if he did exist. That night the bastard didn't

appear and never did again. Turns out The Pillow-faced Man was caused by a streetlight shining from the next block over. Somehow it became a creepy alien figure in the distance between its source and my window. The solution was to close my drapes. * This troper's living room is set up so that a person can come in and hide behind the couch without the person sitting on the couch noticing. So, one day, when I was around 4, while my dad was absentmindedly watching TV, I snuck behind the couch, waiting to scare him. However, he was watching one of my favorite movies, Pee Wee's Big Adventure, so I just sat down and watched it without him knowing. Once the commercial came on, my dad flipped channels to the other movie his was watching. You wanna guess what it was? IT. Yeah, that's right: THAT IT. And just as if this wasn't cruel enough, the change was accompanied by a dramatic violin score with a close up of a torn-up clown face with razor-teeth. I was more confused than scared at the time, BUT THEN my father changed channels to another traumatizing movie. You wanna guess what THIS ONE WAS? [[FridayThe13th FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 7.]] And it occurred RIGHT as Jason is unmasked by the psychic girl. So not only did I have two traumatizing scenes played back-to-back, but now, every time I see a cute red tricycle, I picture a MonsterClown and a rotting, decaying, Jason Voorhees coming to eat me OH DEAR GOD SOMEBODY SAVE ME! * When this troper was 7 or 8, she read in a book about space that the sun will expand and swallow up the earth in about 6 billion years. It scared the crap out of her and she was afraid that she would die because it happened early. ** Same here. I even began trying to figure out ways Earth could avoid being killed when the Sun eventually reaches the end of its life (not comprehending that even if the planet DIDN'T get swallowed up we'd have a miniscule amount of time before we all died anyway). ** I feared that as a little girl. Hated summers for that reason (California's weather didn't help the sun theory). Although as a little girl I could read about the Ebola virus (not the one from Zaire), japanese box jellyfish, and King Tut's curse. I was werid at 9 years old. * Elevators. Don't laugh at me, I'm terrified of elevators. I'm both acrophobic and claustrophobic, so to me, nothing could be scarier than a rickety little box that could at any point break, and send me falling twelve stories to my doom. The one time I've ever had to go in one of those old-school [[TheShining Overlook-esque]] metal elevators without doors, I nearly hyperventilated, and burst out of it like a BatOutOfHell. Of course, it's in an art museum, so everyone thought I was nuts. ** [[TheOtakuNinja This Troper]] knows what you mean by being afraid of elevators, though for me, it comes more from the fear of the damn thing just suddenly dropping while I'm inside. I blame the Disney's Tower of Terror attraction/movie for that. *** [[SweetsButtons This Troper]] has had a fear of elevators longer than she can remember, due to the fact she got stuck in one at 6 months old, and then later at 14 months, and then later at roughly 3 years, and then twice at 4, and then four fucking times at 5, and then three at age 6, and then [[FlatWhat somehow forgetting about it all]]

at ages 7 & 8 and remaining unharmed, and one relatively harmless experience at 9 (she was stuck for only 5 minutes or so). Yes, after 16 incidents, she somehow got over her fear. She spent years as a normal child, with only faint paranoia when it came to elevators, until age 16 when she was trapped in an elevator yet again. Only, this time, she was with 12 strangers (who didn't speak English), and spent 4 hours in the thing. I'm 17 now, and I've learned my lesson. 17 times in 17 years is enough to prove my intense fear of elevators is justified... I haven't been on one since. I posted this as a response to the previous, because, somehow, I can go on the Tower of Terror without breaking a sweat. ***** [[CompletelyMissingThePoint That's a lot of numbers.]] * Thorns. Whether in video games or RealLife, I will never get over them. I think this stems from an accident in which I pricked my finger on a cactus as a kid. * On the way back from Anime Club, which lasts until around nine PM, [[{{Dark Lady Celebrian}} this troper]] passed a house in which, through a loft window or whatever it is (window that looks in on the second-floor landing), a giant silhouette of a bear was visible. Now I like to look at it whenever passing that house after Anime Club just to freak myself out, but the first time I saw it made me extremely uneasy. * This troper, known around her school as a quiet geek, was once told to go to Hell by a relativley new boy in her class that didn't like her much. She casually told him that she had, "Been there, done that." Of course, she was referring to the Supernatural season three finale, "No Rest for the Wicked", and was about to tell him so when the power went out in the school and we had to go out into the hall for a severe weather drill. Though the boy and this troper are now friends, he has admitted to this troper that he had nightmares about her for years. This troper still doesn't get it, but, you know... * Rats. This troper would find them to be adorable if not for the fact that they pop up in his garage unexpectedly and have that ''very'' unsettling scuttling noise. Every time he hears or sees one, he screams like nobody's business. His dad, being a bit of a JerkAss, doesn't understand his fear and scolds him for freaking out. ** It's only natural to dislike a pest, as wild rats categorically are. However, [[http://www.suite101.com/view_image.cfm/745576 ''domesticated'']] [[http://critteristic.com/rodents/we-arent-soscary-are-we/ rats]]... can be ''[[http://i61.photobucket.com/albums/h75/rattiluv/Goliath/MiraonherTo nkapillowjun27.jpg quite]]'' [[http://www.flickr.com/photos/30795288@N07/3509331515/ teh]] [[http://www.funny-potato.com/cute-rats-pictures.html cute...]] *** [[JusticeReaper This troper]] can identify with the first troper, albeit his fear and hatred of rats is for more practical reasons: [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking they spread germs and disease through their bites and the fleas they carry, they contaminate food items where they've walked or passed their feces or urine, and they're ugly as sin.]] Just a couple nights ago, I came home from work and realized a rat was in our bedroom, and I stayed outside on the veranda for over an hour until my dad came home...then I went around my computer, only

to realize that the same rat was hiding in my computer desk drawer, and he jumped out and ran across the nearby bookshelf - a few seconds later I was all the way in the kitchen, in the opposite direction. My dad, being a [[JerkAss jerk]] about my fear of rats, scolded me for the noise I was making, and then later made a joke out of how fast and how far from the computer I ran. And this was NOT a little rat; this one was at least half the size of a cat. Thankfully, he eventually got outside, but thinking about it even now...uh-uh, I don't want another experience like that any time soon or EVER. * I was about 4/5 years old in a crowded restaurant, minding my own business when suddenly, out of nowhere, a scary guy in badly applied clown makeup emerged from the crowd, walked right up to my face and in an extremely loud voice shouted at me about whether I'd like a balloon. The event was so scary and traumatising that I can still remember the event and still suffer from extreme Coulrophobia to this day. ** I have a friend who is so scared of clowns he becomes petrified and will almost begin to cry. This is the same man who has broken most of his bones, nearly died a few times (and actually has been techically dead 7 times... in one night), and rarely shows an ounce of fear or pain. * I work as a cashier at a large grocery store, so aside from some strange veggies and meat that come through my till, there's really nothing that would freak me out. But one day, this guy was going through the till next to me and I think he was putting stuff into the put-away basket under the girl's till. So anyway, I had to turn around to get a customer's recet... and I saw it. It was the largest, hairiest, ugliest plumber butt I have ever seen. The guy's butt was damn near hanging out of his PANTS!!!!!! I still have nightmares about, IT! I still have yet to find a brain bleach to get rid of the image! * This seems pretty minor, but just today my car span on the ice near my University, while there were no other cars around and the car stayed on the road. The idea of being in a vehicle you lost control on, with no idea what is going to happen next; is pretty terrifying. ** Try barely missing a truck from the opposite side of the road. * This troper, a native of southeastern Michigan, was so desperate for work one summer that she took a temp job with a catering company that served the NASCAR racetrack. To make it out there on time, she had to get on the road by 4 in the morning, which she did...during a RAGING, VERY LOUD thunder-and-lightning-storm. To keep her cool, she turned the radio to the local classic rock station and prayed "Please don't play [[ElectricLightOrchestra Fire On High,]] please don't play [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel Fire On High..."]] Guess what they played (as she was driving past a ''cemetery'', no less). * This troper lives in an old pub, almost 200 years old. Quite a few things happen to creep her out: ** Her dogs staring fixedly at dark corners and growling at nothing ** The uncomfortable feeling of being watched or hunted ** Having to walk through the dark pub every morning to get outside ** Hearing a voice whisper in her ear during aforementioned trip through dark pub, and feeling very cold and empty for the rest of the

morning ** At around 11 at night, thumping noises start and keep going from upstairs. NO-ONE ELSE IS IN THE HOUSE other than her parents, both of whom are downstairs. ** A door at the top of the stairs that she has to walk past to get to the bathroom opens and shuts randomly. This tends to co-incide with the inexplicable thumping. Needless to say, she's one terrified teenager. * This troper used to live in a tiny town in Illinois, so there were farms everywhere. For some reason, grain elevators, silos and the like creeped her out at one point. Don't ask her why. * This has probably been mentioned, but you know when you set down a bag full of stuff and, without being touched, something shifts so that it falls over on its own? Is there anything more freaky than that? * This troper finds it interesting that the majority of the NightmareFuel is a great deal scarier to her than any HighOctaneNightmareFuel ever will be. ** [[BonsaiForest This troper]] also feels the same way, and I think I know why. There's a big difference between something meant to be scary and something that isn't, and the High Octane stuff is meant to be scary, so it doesn't creep us out. But subtle horror, which a lot of NightmareFuel is, can really get under your skin! * You know how in the middle of the night the occasional car will pass your house, shining a light across the walls? For some reason, this troper used to find that rather unnerving. * Once I wallked down a quiet and dark street, on a far side of my town. Then I saw a house that had lighting on the outside that made it look calm and friendly, so I crossed the road to walk along it's front garden. A moment later, someone sneezed SO loudly inside that house, I jumped out of my skin .I was so terrified I called my dad on my cellphone and asked him to take me home by car. * This troper has a few: ** When I was around 8 or 9, I was out trick or treating. I passed on house with a life size and very realistic looking witch doll out on the front lawn. I smiled at it as I passed because it looked so cool...then it waved at me. Turns out the 'doll' was actually my neighbor. I didn't realize that at first and proceeded to run screaming down the street. ** As a child, I used to spend a lot of time at my grandmothers house. She lived in a very old house at the time that always kind of gave me the creeps, but this one time, my Aunt and Uncle went on vacation and left their dog and cat with her while I was visiting. That night, my grandma left the door wide open while the cat was wandering around upstairs. I couldn't really sleep, so I opened my eyes and sat up. All I could see where the cats eyes, staring right at me. Yeah... ** One night while trying to sleep (I've always been a night person), I heard this weird sound outside. I can't really describe it, but it definitely wasn't an animal noise. It started out soft but then got louder and louder until finally stopping. I barely slept a wink that night and I still don't know what the sound was. ** When I was eleven, my family moved out of state. Our house was rather nice, and my room had this HUGE window with a shelf type thing

in front of it. Since we'd just moved in, I didn't have any curtains or anything so my window was completely bare. I'm sitting in front of it one day doing whatever, when suddenly, my neighbor just jumps right in front of the window and taps on the glass. It absolutely scared the hell out of me. ** My most recent one is actually pretty mild compared to the others. My mom was in the hospital and I was going everyday to visit her. Her room was on the second floor so I always took the elevator. One day I got on and pushed the button like every other day, only this time, the elevator didn't move. I stood there for about twenty seconds freaking out more and more wondering if the elevator was broken, if I was stuck in there, if I was gonna fall...then I realized I'd pushed the button for the floor I was already on by mistake. That was a pretty scary moment, and I'm not even claustrophobic. * This troper recently went on school camp, and had to do an obstacle course. One part was called "the Tunnel of Claustrophobia". Crawled into this dark plastic tunnel, got about halfway, and realised it was ''actually getting smaller''. Not claustrophobic myself, but imagine if someone who was went through. (The walls ARE closing in!) * When this troper was about six years old, one night he couldn't get to sleep, and was just lying in bed, in the dark. All of a sudden, this really fucking creepy, loud, electronic sounding noise started a few feet away. It seemed like it carried on for hours, and this troper was understandably terrified. Couldn't get to sleep at all. It turned out to be because of this remote controlled robot toy that he had that could move around and transmit your voice from a microphone in the remote control. He found out about a year afterwards that if you touched the antenna of the controller against the one on the robot, it would cause interference with the speaker and start playing a creepy noise. He'd left it on accidentally and a breeze must have started waving the antennae around and hit them off each other. * This troper lives on the edge of quite a large expanse of wooded property far out in the country. One morning when she was in first or second grade, she was out playing on her swingset, facing the trees and tangles of black raspberry bushes less than ten feet away. Her puppy, Oscar, was running around the swings, doing nothing in particular. Suddenly, she heard a bizarre voice--high pitched enough to come from someone small, but distinctly adult and male, say the words, "Hi, Oscar" in a strange, nonchalant tone. She got off her swingset, bolted for the house, called the dog, and locked the door as her disbelieving parents wondered what was wrong with her. Years later, Oscar is an old dog...and this troper is still afraid of the woods, and the unknown things that can watch you from them. * A while ago, it was raining at night, and I had to get something from the car. I was already creeped out, because the rain on the sidewalk sounded like footsteps. Then, as I was grabbing the thing, it looked like there was a man standing in my driveway. It was in the corner of of my eye, but when I turned to look directly, there was no one there. I locked the car and ran to the house. It creeped the hell out of me! * Funny how the article mentions "a character getting run over by a steamroller and turning into a flat photograph." I really wasn't

afraid of much when I was a kid, but this really creeped me out, and sticks with me to this day. I caught part of a show where a kid with a ball gets steamrolled in the middle of the street, leaving a flat cutout of himself lying there, then Steve Martin peeled the ball off the cutout and snarked at the camera. It wasn't scary, and I knew it was supposed to be comedy (and that it was definitely not for kids,) but that was the most deeply disturbing thing I'd ever seen in my life. And even though it probably never aired again, I can never forget it. * A couple days ago, [[KingClark I]] went to yahoo.com to go check up on the news, when a particular headline caught my eye. I clicked on it, and upon reading it the article claimed that the recent earthquake in Chile caused the earth's axis to move 3 inches. At first, I wasn't worried about it too much... Until I noticed some meteorites flying across my computer screen. After looking at it long enough, I noticed it was an ad for ''TwentyTwelve''. ParanoiaFuel indeed. * [[AngieNickinson This Troper]] works at a waterpark during the summer, and every so often, the supervisors slip in a test dummy to see how quickly the lifeguard will notice it and dive in to 'rescue' it. The first time I had to save one (a child-sized one), I seriously got freaked out by its lack of limbs and perpetually opened mouth once I took it out of the water. * I'm not 100% sure if this goes here, but...[[http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/2010/03/08/article-1268043689331089E6574000005DC-814475_636x709.jpg Ben Stiller at the 2010 Academy Awards.]] Good God, those ''EYES''... * This troper visted an art museum with her father once when she was about six. While looking through an exhibit of statues and scultures, they came across a line of costumes made from various different materials. They were creepy, yes, but then she noticed a modern sneaker underneath one costume. Being a very...imaginative child, she got it into her head that there were actual people under the costumes, frozen and doomed to stay there forever. She started whimpering like crazy and begging her father to leave the room. To this day, she refuses to go back to that art museum and her dad still delights in teasing her about it. * I was an utter wimp as a kid, afraid of things like E.T, Harry Potter...erm, dolphins...I also had a phobia of guns(''phobia''phobia)(don't worry, IGotBetter on my own) when a police officer came to the school to inform us about them. I'm pretty sure the event ''scarred'' me. There was a glass case full of guns, see? The police officer asked a couple of us to go up and point to which ones we thought were real and which ones weren't. When we were done, he told us to lie on the floor. Then he told us that we all were dead now, since every single one of those guns was real! Later, he read a book about guns that told us bullets could ''shoot through walls'', and used our teacher in an example of drive-by shootings. ("Now imagine Ms. [=McClaine=] is driving in her car at night...") Then he showed us a PSA video or whatever. A kid and his friend find a gun under a bed, and he shoots himself in the face with it. They then show him halfparalyzed, with leg braces and a wheelchair, saying "This kid was one of the lucky ones." The police officer took out his own gun and showed

it to us after the video, and I was practically crying out of fright. I tried to assure myself he wouldn't carry a loaded gun in front of us, but he told us it was loaded, and then I started vocally whimpering involuntarily. He noticed this(I was in the front row) and tried to get closer to comfort me or whatever, but I backed away veerrrryyy quickly! For quite a few months after that day, I spent time rushing past, ducking, or avoiding windows for fear of a criminal shooting me through them. I also had a bunch of scary nightmares. Like I said, I'm pretty much over that now, but I still wince when I see an officer and notice their gun holster. * In 2007 my family and I visited the Postojnska caves in Slovania. To get in you had to take a train ride that went scarily close to the walls, And that wasn't the worst part. I was sure that in any moment the ride will shift to an underground roller coaster, sending us down an enormous drop, like I saw once on a local TV series. It didn't happen, but that fear was so stressing I had nightmares about it that night. * [[TenderLumpling This troper]] does NOT like teddy bears. Why? [[http://images.businessweek.com/ss/06/09/popular_toys/image/teddy_rux pin.jpg Teddy Ruxpin]]. Especially when that tape is in. [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pgj4SZdavNg Come dream with me toniiight...]] Um, no thanks, I'll sleep with my baseball bat and one eye open. (I should also point out that the Teddy Ruxpin I ran into had nearly-dead batteries. Brr.) ** This troper had a similar experience that left me somewhat traumatized into my mid-teens. My suggestion? Forceful application of buckshot to Ruxpin's face. (Worked for me, anyway!) * About a year ago, [[MonSolo this troper]] accidentally got some spyware (aptly named "scareware") onto her computer. I was already on edge about the whole thing, because I am very careful about not clicking on pop-ups when I think they're really scareware. I managed to delete the program, but there were still little bits and pieces that needed to be cleaned up by my antivirus program. Said program, when it detects a virus, will [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ycs92N_rph8 play a siren]] and declare: "Caution. A virus has been detected." Now imagine this going off unexpectedly (A) late at night and (B) while the laptop is ''closed''. Yeah. * You hear some weird sounds when something is in your ear. Just now, I put my finger in my ear because I'm gross. The noise I heard sounded like MY BRAIN WAS PULSING ** And that's without mentioning the even more irritating Tinnitus sound. Although then again, a good way to deal with tinnitus would be to put on some music to stop you from concentrating on it. ** When this troper had a concussion (and Post-concussive syndrome) she had often had both of those, and tinnitus 24/7. Now she has recurring tinnitus. Now, she believes that as a result from the prior brain injury, she has that brain pulsing feeling when ever she is sick or tired. Being a busy high school student and athlete, she can assure you that this happens quite often. TMJ is also a contributor to this (from the concussion; she's getting it worked on). * This troper can remember a few things that plagued her childhood.

The titans from Hercules, the animated movie, an episode of Blue's Clues, and the behind of her clubhouse. She had a recurring nightmare about a bear that pops out when going behind the clubhouse, and eats her dad who was trimming the hedges. On a more disturbing note,this troper can remember contemplating death, quickly, at four(ish) years old. Lacking an understanding of the concept, she just pictured a soldier (she even remembers how said hypothetical soldier looks) being shot and killed (couldn't actually picture the blood), and then the next step (death), all she could place him in is what she describes as a "black hole", but it was really just him "floating" around in black (which most likely symbolizes nothingness). This preschool troper decided that she would live forever, becoming a shriveled old women, sitting in a rocking chair, in pain, but that was okay because she would still be alive, forever. This troper immediately decided to stop thinking about it, because she figured either 1) she would understand it when she got older or 2) the adults would tell her what she needed to know, when she was old enough. Maybe this is what motivated her to read science books when she was younger. On a slightly ironic note, she never thought about death again until she learned about religion. Years later, she is finally at terms with it. The fact that this is one of (if not the) strongest memory from her early childhood, means this must have disturbed her more than she thought. * Laugh, Or no, But For This Troper, It Was (And Still Is) Going Up The Stairs At Night. I Don't Know If Its Only My House Like This Or No, But Every Step Up I Hear One Off Key Step Right Behind Me On The Stairs. I Would Literally Run Like The Devil Was At My Heel Going Up The Stairs At Night When I Was Younger, Even Now I Still Get Spooked. * This troper once, at around age 8-10, had an infestation of large black ants in his bedroom, complete with these giant, winged queenlevel ants. In order to solve the problem, my mother sprayed the floor of the room in order to ward them off; this backfired ''spectacularly'' when this troper woke the next morning to find the corpses of likely ''hundreds'' of GIANT BLACK ANTS WITH CREEPY LEGS STICKING UP INTO THE AIR litering his floor like it had been the sight of a savage ant civil war during the night. For ''years'' afterwards, this troper had nightmares of being engulfed by a swarm of giant black insects... * This troper was once on a school camping trip to a farm/conference center that sat next to a large forest with run-down cabins lining the edge of the forest. During the first night there, some of the kids from the older class came to our room to tell ghost stories, finishing with one that they set at one of the cabins. This troper ''freaked out'' and was too terrified to sleep that night, convinced that I could see figures moving around the field between us and the cabin from the story, and that they were mutilated victims from the story coming to get us... * When I was in 6th grade we were allowed to go to a camp for a few days. When we got there we were assigned cabins and all that other formal stuff (I'll spare you the details of the day). The 1st night we were there we were all gathered around a fire singing the usual stupid ass campfire songs (the way I described it should give you a hint as to how much I was participating). Then one of the other teachers came

and began telling the tale of "Willy", an AxCrazy murderer who escaped from a prison across the lake (which wasn't there anymore, nor was there any sign that there ever was one) 50 years ago and was hiding in these very woods (there's a bit of FridgeLogic in there, so I'll give you a moment to work that out). Then another of the brilliant teachers there decided to scare the ever-loving dogshit out of a bunch of 11 year olds by jumping out and making us think "Willy" was there. The cabin I was in with about 12 other kids was right next to the woods, so we were unable to sleep easily fearing that we'd be killed by an obviously fake killer. There was also a (supposedly) haunted cabin, but that was only scary for the poor bastards who were stuck there (and the story probably only started because the cabin was in the middle of the area, away from the woods). ** Did that happen in Illinois in the 1960s, and was the teacher who told you that named Miss or Mrs. Sim? If so, I think that might have been my aunt. She told me a story of her telling a story at camp that scared all of the kids. * This tropers grandparents' house was really not creepy, but in the room he tended to stay in, at 11 pm every night ''something'' would touch the doorknob making jiggle like someone was about to come in. Of course, this was after everyone had gone to bed. This troper doesn't believe in ghosts or anything, but it was still really freaky. One night, while trying to get to sleep and being pissed off at a lot of other noises keep him up (cars driving by, etc.) and the doorknob jiggled right on cue, he quickly sat up and yelled, "and what the hell is that?! Shut up!" * This Troper, when he was young, was scared to death of the Humpty Dumpty scene from a certain series of Mother Goose videos. The puppets fell into UncannyValley, but the implication of Humpty Dumpty's death was what sent him over the edge. * There's a huge bunch of trees near this troper's grandparents' house in the province. In the light, it looks friendly and all, but it looks like a nightmare forest in the dark. Since this troper has to go past that forest to enter the house, it takes tremendous willpower not to run frantically after imagining several creatures lurking in the forest waiting to grab her. It doesn't help that the neighbors tell stories to her about people who enter the forest and either come back "changed" or never come back at all. * When this troper was younger, she was quite scared of her closet. Well, at least, the bogeyman inside her closet. Reading "The Bogeyman" by Stephen King reinforced those fears. * Roaches. Just...roaches. Geez, even just looking at the word as I type is freaking this troper out just a little. I live in Florida, where they get more than an inch long and can ''fly.'' * When this troper was eight or nine, she was playing with a couple of stuffed teddy bears and had what she calls a "mind glitch" moment. All of a sudden she couldn't move and the teddy bears started ''talking''. It was like one of those moments where you're half-asleep and your body is paralyzed, only this troper swears she was totally awake. One of the teddy bears had a very deep voice. It ended after a few seconds and she ran to tell her parents, but they didn't seem to believe her, and she's never been able to look at Jeffrey Bear the same way again.

She's always been a bit wary of having another mind glitch. * This troper is a gay man. Trying not to get too inappropriate here, but you know that joke/urban legend about what guys like me are supposed to enjoy doing with gerbils/hamsters/small rodents? It scares the hell out of me. That's one of the most terrifying things I can think of anyone doing to me. Not helped by the abusive ex]] who kept a pet rat and did things like threaten to, um, [[IfYouKnowWhatIMean introduce her to me]] while I was sleeping just to screw with my head or walk in on me in the shower with her on his shoulder, slam me up against the wall, and make like he was going to put her somewhere uncomfortable whether I wanted him to or not. Rodents have always made me a little nervous with their giant, super-sharp teeth. But see, the thing about rodents is that when they're feeling trapped, they try to chew their way out. Which...'''''ow.''''' * So, I once spent a night watching MarbleHornets, whole thing from beginning to episode 26. Later the next day, around dusk, [[TheInsomniac I'm utterly sleep deprived]], and waiting outside a concert I needed to take notes on for some extra credit points in a class. Then I saw [[TheSlenderManMythos the Slender Man]] out of the corner of my eye. Nearly jumped out of my skin, then went to examine it. Surely just a trick of light and shadow, right? Nope, it's an artdeco statue of a man, whose exaggerated proportions make him look almost exactly like the Slender Man, albeit with a tophat and an angular face. [[Recap/DoctorWhoNSS3E10Blink I didn't dare to take my eyes off it]] until the concert opened, and even then I kept it in my sight as long as I was able. [[AnAesop Sleep deprivatation sucks]]. * This Troper was afraid of aliens, any kind, any shape, any form. I was absolutely deathly afraid of ET as a child. Every other kid looooooved ET. He was a loveable alien who rode in the basket of your bike! No. [[ThisIsSparta I. Was. Terrified.]] Though I may have been more afraid of the Haz-Mat people coming to my house because of an alien, rather than the alien itself. My parents also decided it was a good idea to show me MarsAttacks! as a youngin', because it was Tim Burton (so how bad could it be?). No. Oh god, no. I don't care HOW goofy those aliens looked. I was TERRIFIED. And then a few years later, Signs came out. And I watched it. And now I can't look down deserted hallways/alleyways/etc because AN ALIEN MIGHT BE CROSSING. * I got scared a lot when I was little, by balloons popping to those talking training toilets to fire alarms. (which I'm still kinda scared of today) However, the one that takes the cake is when I was in bed, trying to sleep, then all of a sudden I heard a screeching demonic noise. I ran to mom, scared out of my wits. Turned out my talking Barney toy doll thing was very low on batteries, turned on in the middle of the night, and made that noise. From that day on I never had another talking toy. * Days before this troper's teacher went to USA, we treated her to a screening of Food Inc. Go ahead, tropers. Watch it. * Waaaaay back in the '60s or early '70s Burger King ran some animated commercials with a wolf eating three Whoppers - he "makes a pig of himself" and turns into a pig. My father and brother were at BK. Dad ate two Whoppers, then went to buy a third. Brother was scared as shit that Dad would turn into a pig, and forced Dad to not get that third

burger. Knowing my father I rather suspect he wasn't even that hungry, he did it on purpose. ** At least you can thank history that SpiritedAway hasn't come out back then. * When this tropette was 5 years old, she had a habit of crawling out of bed, down the hall and hiding in a small corner in-between the couch and the wall so she could watch TV. One night, her mum was asleep on the couch with the TV on, so she hid in the corner to watch what was on. What was on that night, you might ask? Why, {{The Cell}} of course! To the 5-year old me, it wasn't so scary.....until the part with the horse. The only reason she didn't burst out in hysterical sobbing was because her mum caught her. * This Troper has a friend who owns an old-school xbox. Apparently, these xboxes came out with an "I.D. Card" and a personality programmed in, so when it sits at idle at the home screen, it makes noises attributed to it's personality. His friend had one called "dizzy", which is apparently Microsoft Speech for "Demonic Noises That Will Scar You Emotionally". * This Troper (Icalasari (for some reason, the page link template does not work with my username)) is afraid of several things: ** The dark except under certain conditions (basically, it either needs to be really closed up so I know there is nothing hiding, or really open (as in the middle of the plains) so I can see everything and bolt like a jack rabbit if need be). This leads to me sprinting down the hall after turning off the light (no switch near my room) when he has worked himself up ** Mannequins. Oh god, mannequins. Just... So bloody creepy. Maybe this is why Slenderman freaks me the hell out... * I thought, since it's summer and there are fireflies out now, that I'd catch a bunch of them tonight. I proceeded to catch one decent sized one with a greenish light and put it in the container, followed by a much smaller one with a more orange-tinted light. in less than a minute of putting the two in the same container, i see the larger one BEGIN TO EAT the smaller one. i ended up throwing the container, then having to ride home holding it, watching the silhouette of the firefly getting devoured. phobia of fireflies successfully developed. * The Woodland Park Zoo in this troper's hometown of Seattle used to have signs that said "You may not feed the animals" with a picture of a hand holding popcorn sticking out of a hippo's mouth, and "Stay on path", with an alligator grabbing for someone's foot, although the zoo has never had those(only African dwarf crocodiles). Many of the larger beasts of burden, as well as [[HellIsThatNoise the sounds of certain primates]], also scared me as a kid. * This Troper is terrified of the dark to the point of not being able to sleep without a light on. She suspects that the three times during a seven-month hospitalization that she woke in the middle of the night in a dark room and saw orderlies pushing a covered corpse past her room to the service elevator did not help. Neither did the one time that the orderlies elected to go on coffee break and left the corpse just sitting there on the gurney outside her room. ''For more than a half hour.'' Picture staring at that covered corpse for a half hour at around one in the morning when you're lying in a dark room...and not

daring to look away. Oh, and just to mess with her some more on that particular occasion, the convalescent home she was in had a policy of denying that death existed, so it took about three days before any of the staff would admit that a patient two doors up from her had died in his sleep. Nothing is quite so freaky as experiencing something terrifying and then having everyone around you deny that it ever happened. * I don't know if I have been subjected to too much [[CreepyCircusMusic creepy circus music]] or something, but even circus music played in the non creepy way freaks me the hell out. It's just... ''sinister''. * This troper's local zoo has a cassowary exhibit. Now, cassowaries are pretty creepy as it is, what with their dinosaur-like appearances and angry-looking eyes, but at least this one is behind a sturdy wire fence, right? Well, this certain cassowary always manages to terrify me anyway. This probably has something to do with its habit of pacing back and forth, ''staring'' at anyone outside the exhibit. ''Then it starts the chew on the wire of the fence.'' It has done this every single time my family has been there. Generally, I want to get out of there pretty much as soon as we arrive, because something in the back of my mind insists that, one of these days, that cassowary is actually going to manage to chew all the way through that fence, and I sure as heck don't want to be there when it does. * This troper has the most ungodly fear of mirrors (Catoptrophobia). And is also very paranoid. AND is afraid of complete darkness. Needless to say, going to the bathroom (Which has a mirror almost covering an ENTIRE WALL) in the middle of the night is horrible. * ThisTroper has a few. ** When he was about 8 years old, him and his brother got up in the middle of the night to play Legend of Zelda: OoT. We had gotten to the "ghost staircase" portion of the Forest Temple. What is basically is, is there are two short staircases with four paintings in the stairwell. All of them were blank and pitch black, except for one of the paintings, which had the picture of a ghost in it. [[spoiler: You had to use the bow you got a bit later in the temple to shoot the paintings to fight the ghost.]] Anyway, if you got too close to the painting with the ghost in it, the ghost would make one of those ghouty "a-whoo-a-whoo" sounds and move to a different painting. The troper accidentally walked by the ghose painting without see it, causing the sound to go off. It scared the crap out of him. ** He has no idea where he got it from, but when he was about the same age, he had a dream where the picture on the EvilTwin page was chasing him, trying to eat him. He can never look at Kermit the same way again. * [[Tropers/PentiumMMX2 This troper]] got plenty when he was playing [[TheLegendOfZeldaOcarinaOfTime Zelda: Ocarina of Time]] for the first time, after renting it. I was afraid to stay out on Hyrule Field after dark; because that was when the cool adventure music went away, the gates to the Castle Market closed, and the Skullchildren came out of the ground in mobs. I would either rush to the nearest village or hide in the water until the sun rose, because I didn't want to get killed by them (I somehow assumed they where invincible, so I didn't even try

to attack them). However, I overcame this when I finally got a copy of my own years later; often challenging myself to see how many I can defeat before the sun rises. * This Troper had three freaky experiences with sleep...you know, the thing that's supposed to be relaxing? ** First, I was trying to get to sleep, and realized I had a headache in the back of my head. This had been happening a lot recently, and I wondered if it was a sign of some condition or something. Immediately, my vision started blackening, and I felt lightheaded, like when you stand up suddenly. I freaked out, and this kept happening when I tried to sleep. It seemed like I lost the ability to automatically breathe, and would suffocate if I went to sleep. ** Another time, I had exploding head syndrome. I was nearly asleep when I heard a loud drone, sort of like the noise the tripods make in TheWarofTheWorlds. I woke up, but calmed down when I realized that it was in my head. ** The worst, though, was sleep paralysis. I woke up, lying on my back. My eyes were open and darting back and forth, and I was breathing loudly. For a couple minutes, I couldn't control my body, and I thought I was having a seizure. *** Hey, it's okay. This troper is sending you hugs, 'cause sleep paralysis and exploding head syndrome always sucks. Also, the first example sounds like sleep apnea. You might wanna talk to your doctor, they can help you get that under control. * Near Halloween last year, this troper awoke from a scary nightmare about being mauled to death by some kind of robotic dog. I suddenly woke up in a state of panic/sleep paralysis, convinced that a witch doll I had in the window would come to life at any moment and attack me if I moved a muscle. After agonizing in bed for at least half an hour, I gathered up the courage to get up, grab the doll and stuff it in the bottom of a plastic crate in my closet, putting another plastic crate on top of it. Thinking about it in there still gives me the creeps sometimes. I know I'll never put it out for decoration again. Funny how bloody body parts and realistic rubber spiders are fine, but one creepy doll . . . * This troper is open and vocal about her arachnophobia. It's gotten to a point where whenever a spider appears in her bedroom, she takes sadistic delight in crushing it to death with a tissue box (she's still scared to death of the way they skitter around, though). A few years ago, she was woken up in the middle of the night by this really weird and creepy tickle on her arm. She turns on the light and lo and behold, a dinky little spider the size of a fingernail is crawling down her arm. Cue this troper screaming bloody murder and sleeping on the couch for the rest of the night. ** You take delight in crushig, killing and torturing another living creature that is, for the most part, harmless and absolutely terrified of you? Yeah, nightmare fuel. * This troper has always been a little freaked out by plague doctor masks. When he was designing a monster for his indie comic, he decided it didn't look unsettling enough, so he made its face look like a plague doctor's mask because "hey, they scare ''me.''" It worked. Also, as a kid, he used to sleep curled up because of a weird fear

that snakes were hiding at the foot of his bed and would bite his feet. * Once [[Keys2theARC this troper]] was walking in a field when he stepped into a mud patch and suddenly sank up to his knee. After he finally pulled himself free, the air displacement caused the mud hole to make a sound that sounded just like a huge belch. Also, the troper was also unnerved by rocks covered in seaweed,because he expected them to start shuffling and trying to eat people. Imagine their experience when they went to see ''KingKong'' (2005). * When he's in the right mood, ThisTroper is freaked by the way the Windows desktop turns monochrome when you bring up the 'shut down' options. It makes it seem like the computer just bled to death or had its soul sucked out or something. Also, electric toothbrushes when the battery is running down and they start having deathly fits. Urgh. Makes me shudder. * Ants. In small numbers they're all right. but in swarms of crawling black insects that could get inside you I am scared crapless to get near them. Dad finds the fear annoying, since I broke a window in a "Get the hell of me!" to the crawling ants. ** This troper has the same fear, she only gets upset if one or two get on her, though. * This troper is terrified of stuffed animals. No, not the toy kind, real stuffed animals, like in a taxidermy studio. Especially bears. And especially when they're standing up on their hind legs. It looks like it's about to slash you with those huge claws and bite you with those bone-crushing jaws. ** Now you've given me this delightfully evil idea of replacing one of those stuffed critters in a museum with someone in one of those truly amazing fursuits that get used in certain commercials and movies. When everyone is in the room and staring, a recorded growl plays, and the bear/tiger/gorilla jumps up on its hind legs and starts to move... ** This Troper has a friend who was given a real stuffed owl as a "gift" by her neighbors (They thought it would be cool because she LIKED OWLS). If having a dead owl in your room wasn't bad enough, did I mention that it's eyes follow you when you walk across the room? * For some reason, almost everyone who looks at ''this pic [[http://pics.livejournal.com/eric_hinkle/pic/00008b91/]]'' (and be warned, NSFW) gets creeped out by it. I wish someone would explain why. ** Doesn't really bother me, but maybe it's because the face on the skin looks like it's alive, and sad. * {{Tamagotchi}}. It gave this Troper visions the night after I had my mom take the batteries out of it, two days after I bought it, since it was creeping me out. Let's say that it is the fact that it could never turn off until it runs out of batteries... I refused to let my brother buy it. * This Troper just visited the LegoLand Discovery Center in Chicago. You first go through a room with a lego model of Chicago, then you enter a whole small jungle with life size lego animals, with creepyass trees, lights, and sound effects. Near the end of the jungle, you see a life size Indiana Jones in lego. Everything in the environment aside from some of the animals and Indy are sorta nightmare fuel. You

then enter a grey-and-illuminated-yellow tunnel, with strange hissing noises. What are they you say? A giant spider. A huge realistic lego spider that makes loud hissing noises just staring at you, about to lunge. creepy. * At my aunt and uncle's house, there is a statue that I was terrified of when I was little. It's a statue of a man with a long beard wearing a hat. My uncle calls him Murphy. I cried every time we visited my aunt and uncle. Now I'm much older, and I still avoid Murphy whenever I visit my aunt and uncle. * A few days ago, in my eighth grade science class, some kids asked if we could disect anything. My teacher said it was illegal for kids under ninth grade to disect any animals. Then some kids asked why, because a few of them disected animals as young as first grade. I kind of wish they didn't, because my teacher said that some kids can't handle it mentally and go home to disect their pet dogs and cats. Yeah, thanks for the nightmares of insane first graders going home to kill their dogs and cats. * This troper is scared by a few things: ** The dark. I still sleep with a light on because when I turn off my lights, my mind plays tricks on me and I think there's something standing in my room. Oddly enough when I'm in the dark and others are with me (like at a sleepover) I'm completely fine. Its only when I'm alone that I'm afraid. ** Mirrors in the dark. I cannot look into mirrors if its dark in the room. I'm afraid that I'll see something behind me and when I turn to look at it, it'll be gone. ** Also when I was a little kid, one of my favorite game was PajamaSam: There's No Need To Hide When It's Dark Outside (Ironic, I know). One of the scenes in the game had Sam get captured by talking trees as they stole his stuff. For some reason, those trees scared me. I thought that they would come into my room and get me. So for a long time I hid myself completely under the covers, thinking if I was hidden the trees couldn't get me. * This troper has been reading the Nightmare Fuel AND High Octane Nightmare Fuel pages all day, just about every single one and guess what? SHE REGRETS THE DECISION. She's currently huddled in her duvet, with her tea trying not to think of Squidward's Suicide... I hate the Spongebob crew. ** This troper agrees wholeheartedly. Couldn't sleep for days after reading that, and it was probably made worse by the fact that this troper LOVED Spongebob as a kid, so she can imagine it pretty perfectly. * This troper, as a kindergartener, frequently slept with the fluorescent lights on, and had nightmares about them and electric fans. * For me, this would be quiet empty towns. I don't like to go walking at night unless I have a weapon to hand. Add to that both [[{{Halflife}} Ravenholm]], and the entirety of {{Bioshock}}, and I feel justified in not going anywhere at night... * Steamrooms that are in the process of letting steam in are nightmare fuel for this Troper. The combination of the [[HellIsThatNoise loud, hissing noise]] as steam floods the room, the sudden feeling of

shortness of breath as you breathe in said steam (which is also uncomfortably hot), and the way the steam clouds the entire area, making impossible to see a foot in front of one's face is enough to make her run, hands over her ears, from one in seconds flat, and wait until the steam clears a bit to re-enter. The other owners at her ski resort seem to find it amusing (seeing as this Troper is fifteen). * This troper has a few: ** When I was about 4, I had a collection of Adiboo learning disks. I loved them. However, the disks had to be changed to do certain subjects. One day, my 1 year old brother happened to shuffle into the room as I was changing disks, and the volume was up on the highest setting. The game says "Insert the disk or click cancel" SUPER LOUD which made my brother scream for at least fifteen minutes. He's still scared of it today, 8 years later. ** The year before my brother was born, my aunt and uncle went to las vegas to get married, so me and my family were left to look after the house for them. I decided to go exploring upstairs where it was quite dark. On the top floor was a giant cardboard standee of Woody from Toy Story, and I was scared to death by it (bear in mind I was 3). Since then, my family occasionally taunt me about it. * In Year Nine (ninth grade), I had to learn about the ''Titanic'' in History. We got on to the amount of people who died, and I suddenly felt... weird. As in, I felt dizzy, short of breath, tight-chested, I was hearing things as if I was underwater, and I felt so, so, SO scared... and I just thought; ''is this how the people aboard the ''Titanic'' felt when they were drowning?'' To this day, I can't hear about people drowning without a version of that popping up, and I can ''never'' watch ''anything'' about the ''Titanic''. ** Eighth Grade, actually. This troper cannot listen to gory stories (lol rhyme) as a result of his schools ''[[SarcasmMode ingenious]]'' idea to bring a former drug addict into the school to tell us about his addiction. The former addict showed us a picture of his [[NauseaFuel gangrenous leg]] from injecting too much. This troper remembers hearing a girl gag quite loudly and losing consciousness, before his hands went numb. Quickly, he asked to leave. This troper still gets numb hands from really gory pictures or stories. * A long time ago, a local Applebee's had a very realistic, life-size replica of a Native American man in their doorway. I was scared of the "Indian Guy" for years and I had to work up the courage to go past him every time my family ate there. ** More recently, I will not click on the HighOctaneNightmareFuel page for Spongebob. Why? Two days ago, I went there and saw that someone had re-uploaded THAT image. If you've seen the episode "[=WhoBob=] [=WhatPants=]", you'll know ''exactly'' what I'm talking about. * This troper was delivering ads to people's mailbozes when it'd gotten dark. (HEy, it's a living, and he's quit now.) At the ground, he saw something. After looking at it for a while, he realized that once, it had been a bird. Another time, he was walking down the street during his usual evening walk and saw what used to be a rabbit. * Here's a story hot off [[UnusualEuphemism the today]]! So, I'm at my requisite Phys Ed credit, Bowling. Before starting class, a group of Special Ed kids were apparently leaving after a trip. All's well and

good, we split up into groups, start bowling the frame, I keep on sucking. Suddenly, and without warning, from the other side of the alley comes what sounds like the old lady from Poltergeist screaming (on a rhythmic time, no less), "Help! Help! Help!" What's worse, it's at ''just'' the right pitch that it was either a little old raspyvoiced lady, or a ''little voice-undergoing-changing boy''. Everyone just stops altogether as a pair of employees briskly jog back behind the wall. The screaming didn't stop for a few minutes, and the teacher went to see if we should leave. I was actually done, so my problem wasn't whether to keep playing, but if I could ''leave''. And at this point, I '''really wanted to'''. So, the teacher comes back and is naturally asked if everything's okay. His response? A rather unconvincing said to no one instead of all of us, "Oh, yeah, go ahead. Someone just got stuck, is all." He didn't respond to the one or two people brave enough to ask if it was one of the kids. Only one employee ever came back. Didn't see or hear any ambulances, never even saw anyone walk back in there in the first place. Wednesday's gonna be awkward. * This troper has a weird and completely irrational phobia of ''overpasses''. He always has a slight fear that they will collapse and crush him the ''instant'' he drives under one. He has a similar thought whenever he crosses a suspension bridge. * This troper always had a fear of spiders. If one is on the wall? She can't walk past it. Oddly, this is balanced out by a love of spiders, theoretically. She's been known to talk to small spiders climbing up her pants, even. Well, the love showed itself one night with looking up species of spider native to her area. [[http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/c/c4/Brown-reclusecoin.jpg Hello introduction to the Brown Recluse!]] Yay for getting to see pictures of what happens when this thing bites you, namely, your flesh rotting away. Fun. As she looks at [[http://www.ozanimals.com/image/albums/australia/Spider/BDay0098.jpg these pictures]], whimpering in abject terror, that little- It crawled across her keyboard. She didn't notice it until it almost touched her. She doesn't type in the dark anymore. ** This troper seems to remember reading that Brown Recluses only cause necrotic infection some of the time. Still not fun. Her friend ended up with a pretty bad recluse bite on her ankle a few months ago, and you shoulda seen her trying to walk up the stairs. * This troper has two: ** Things in the dark. She is getting a lot better with this, but still occasionally goes into epic-paranoia-mode and convinces herself something's lurking behind the shower curtain, in her closet, or down the side of her bed. Mirrors make it worse. Needless to say, she doesn't do horror movies very well. ** Heights. This troper is extraordinarily acrophobic, which is tons of fun at Cadet summer training where she's expected to cross a fifty foot high, two-hundred foot long two-strand rope bridge. Ever been on a two-strand rope bridge? No? Well, it pretty much feels like you're constantly about to fall off. And then there's the abseiling, where she has to literally walk backwards off a thirty foot drop. Cadets should never hear their Sergeant freak out like this troper's heard

their Sergeant freak out that day. [[Keys2theARC This troper]] was one day out walking in a field when he was about eleven. He was walking through a mud patch when suddenly, his foot sank into the mud almost up to his knee. When he pulled his foot out, the mud hole made a loud slurping sound which sonded exactly like someone burping. Naurally, he ran like the wind. On a similiar note, he was also creeped out by seaweed-covered rocks when he was younger, because he imagined the rocks shuffling around. * That goddamn weather alert sound. One minute you're watching something nice and casual on TV, the next the sound suddenly turns off, and these beeps come on, followed by a really long one. I know it's supposed to be a drill for a severe warning in the future, but DAMMIT, I thought the TV was possessed by the Devil himself I was little! It still shudders me to this day... * This troper recalls going to a small "carnival" (if it could be called that) that was sponsored by her dad's old place of work when she little. If she remembers correctly. The "carnival" consisted of mainly two attractions - a bouncy house and one of those little train rides but without a train track - and two mascots running around. It was perfectly fine, except for those mascots which scared her out of her mind. One was tall and thin, and the other was short and fat, while both were green, covered in warts, and just generally looked like some sort of boogeymen in the closet. So there she is, with all these other kids, getting on the train ride and enjoying it when she looks back and sees the tall one ''chasing after the train.'' So after the train ride she runs to the bouncy house, steering clear of those THINGS, and again, enjoy it with the other children. Until one of those things comes into the bouncy house, like it's going to come play with the children and trips and falls face first, at which point this troper just ran screaming to her parents and yelling at them to take her home. To this day she wonders ''WHAT WERE THOSE THINGS SUPPOSED TO BE??'' * This troper has bad memories associated with certain theme parks. Namely: ** The now-removed Gremlins ride at Warner Bros. Movie World (Gold Coast, Australia). Seeing all those horrible little monsters tying people up and baring some (for an eight-year-old) sharp fangs at you, not to mention perched over a doorway where it looked like it could jump down and into the car at any moment... The troper spent just about the entire ride hiding under a hat. Oh, and she was too scared to stay in the hotel room alone for 10 minutes that night while her parents went downstairs to the nearby convenience store to get some milk. Ironically, the also-gone Maverick show (and the creepy gravedigger cast member who interacted with the audience while they entered) didn't scare her at all-- it was her favorite show at the park, and was very sad when it was replaced with a cheap Wild Wild West-based ride. ** The Jaws ride at Universal Studios. Oh dear Lord. The troper, a competitive swimmer (with a coach who motivated swimmers by saying "Imagine there's a shark behind you"!), made the mistake of sitting near the side... Seeing the shark emerge with mouth agape made her scream. Feeling the creature's fin scrape the keel left her shivering,

and being 'trapped' in the burning boathouse did NOT help at all. She got off the ride with trembling legs. ** The Van Helsing walkthrough at Universal Studios California. Essentially, a giant building decorated in the style of Van Helsing, including recreated set pieces, and featuring actors dressed like Dracula's mooks hidden or jumping out at you throughout the building. Having seen the film and enjoyed it, this troper did not expect it to be that scary. Thirty feet from the door, she hears the recorded sound clip of the werewolf's howl from the film. Cue instant "... oh crap. This is going to be worse than I thought." Thanks to some very wellplaced actors (kudos to their skills at being strategically placed for the biggest scares) and an overall terrifying atmosphere (vividly remembering what the werewolf was like did NOT help)... the troper pretty much ran through the place in terror. Looking back on it, if it's still there... she'd love to work there. * This troper used to work at a library. One day she got bored on her break, and started flipping through a book of optical illusions that she found. One of them was an upside-down photo of Margaret Thatcher, with the eyes and mouth right-side up, demonstrating how your brain fills in the details based on what it thinks it should be seeing or something like that because the picture didn't really look like anything was wrong with it. The accompanying paragraph told you to flip the book around so the picture was right-side-up but the eyes and mouth were upside-down, to prove that the picture did look off and your brain was playing a trick on you. This troper turned the book around, and the resulting NightmareFace still gives her shivers occasionally. ** This troper has a similar book at home. There's an altered photo of Johnathan Frakes in it. [[SarcasmMode Niiiiice.]] * This troper had one of those Barbie hair-and-makeup doll heads as a kid. It sat on the bookshelf directly at the foot of her bed. And I swear, it blinked and smiled at me. My mother finally got rid of it when I put it on the dining room table for three weeks straight and absolutely refused to play with it in daylight hours. * This Troper once sat down on the toilet to do his business, and was there for quite some time, reading a book. When he got up to flush, he noticed there was A MOTHERFUCKING WASP SITTING THERE. He hasn't been able to use a toilet since without thoroughly checking for wasps beforehand. * The Boo Hag, aka "Old Hag". My dad's side of the family has Southern Black roots, and Dad had a book full of Southern folk tales, such as the Talking Eggs. One that he never let me read as a kid was the story about the Boo Hag. Should've listened. When Dad wasn't around, I went over to the book case, pulled out the book, and read the story. I really should've listened, since I was kept up ALL FUCKING NIGHT because of that story. What happens? Well, a girl is haunted every night by the Boo Hag, who comes into her room and rides her like a witch rides a broom through the air. The girl's mother figures it out and takes a jar, a cork stopper, and either twelve or thirteen needles. One needle is put into the jar, the others go into the stopper. This stops the Hag since supposedly she's trapped inside the jar or something. But there's a catch. The charm only works while the

girl's mother is alive. After the mother passes, the hag LIES IN WAIT FOR THE GIRL, WHO IS TOO SCARED TO LEAVE HER HOUSE BECAUSE OF THIS. I'm twenty, and if I read about the Hag online, or watch documentaries about the Hag on TV, without fail, I'll be kept up all night by it. * This troper has heavy entomophobia, an irrational fear to insects. The worst episode was when in a car together with my parents, my brother and sister-in-law, a bee got inside and decided to land on my head. My brother pointed out where the bee had landed, which in turn made me start screaming like a banshee. My usual reaction to butterflies is to run away or, in case I can't, curl as far away from them as I can. I KNOW they can't do anything to me, but that doesn't help. * This troper makes a habit out of listening to her mp3 player before she goes to bed at night, headphones on, silent as the grave to the outside world. Lights off, door closed, she feels comfortable doing the odd dance number and lipsynching like a crazy person. HOWEVER. At the same time she feels completely and utterly compelled to continually rearrange any clothes on the floor, in her chair, hanging around because OH MY GOD THEY LOOK LIKE BODIES. That, and she's continually tracking the shadows on the wall, in the folds of her curtains, behind her shelf, because she feels very watched in her room. * This troper lives on Guernsey, an island off the coast of Normandy that was occupied by German forces during WW2. There's plenty of haunted houses on the island, from the loft my mother once called her room that turned out to have been the final resting place of 2 young girls boarded in during the occupation and left for dead. There's also the chain house, a house so haunted that the current owner refuses to inhabit it, despite it being one of the finest looking houses on the island, phenomenon includes whispers, feelings of being grabbed and sudden chills. The worst places of all are the bunkers though, such as the Mirus Battery. It was the housing for a naval artillery gun during the occupation and is now only used by Airsofters and LARPers. There are still large tracts of the facility that are out of use and it seems to be larger on the inside than should be possible, to the point where there are corridors between what appears to be two adjacent corridors. It doesn't help that my most memorable experiences there are the free-for-all hunt airsoft game and the LARP that set us against Reavers and xenomorphs. The place has a cold, hollowness to it, like it draws the atmosphere out of you, there's no crushing dread or fear, just the feeling of the heat being torn out of you. * I went to an amusement park (not Disney) that had a "Lewis and Clark Adventures" ride. There was a giant bear that pops out at you, [[GoddamnBats bats with glowing red eyes]], and a painting of the team encountering a beached whale (I have a fear of whales, so you can see how unnerving this would be). I had to close my eyes halfway through to keep from crying. Okay, this was when I was 7 or 8. Recently, I (now 14) went to the park with a friend. Her friend wanted to ride the Lewis and Clark ride. I hadn't gone on the ride again since the first time and really didn't want to again, but she really wanted to and you can't ride alone, so I agreed to go. Didn't open my eyes once the whole time, AND had my hands over my ears.

* Earthquakes. ** [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2010_Canterbury_earthquake The earthquake]] that this Troper details was preceded by a foreshock 5 seconds before the main quake, allowing him to be awake for the main show. ** Imagine if you will, lying in bed sound asleep, suddenly jerked awake by seemingly nothing. ** As you lie there trying to comprehend the situation, your bed begins shaking violently as the house roars in agony. ** The sound of your home, your safety net being torn apart (fortunately that wasn't what the noise had actually been) as you bounce violently in your bed, helpless against the forces of nature. ** 40 seconds is an [[UnderStatement eternity]] when you are confronted with such unspeakable terror. * When this troper was a child, his parents always made him sleep with his door open. Ordinarily, this would not be a problem, except that the shadows cast by his night-light, combined with the shadows from his sister's night-light, formed a shape in the hallway that, from his angle, looked like the sihouette of a [[TheSlenderManMythos roughly 10-foot tall man with exagerratedly long limbs]] just staring at him. All night. Every night. For several years. Recently, I discovered {{Marble Hornets}}. I think you can probably guess my psychological state right now. * When this troper was a little kid, her family went to a local water park. I went on one of those tube slides that is enclosed all the way down. Apparently the last few feet of the ride was not sloped enough, so if you didn't have enough momentum from earlier in the ride, you slowed to a stop. The operator of the ride had to climb up into the tube to get me. They said that this happened because I didn't weigh enough to carry me through the ride (marking the only time I couldn't ride something because I was too SKINNY). As an adult, I understand what they meant, but as a kid, I kept wondering what would have happened if I had gotten stuck earlier (and higher) on the slide. * One time, this troper heard an ice cream truck coming around the corner. It was very scary. * This troper has such a fear of the dark, she doesn't like even one room not having some kind of light at nighttime. The room light doesn't have to be on, but the room has to be lit up in someway. And if you turn the light off while she's sleeping, you'd better hope she doesn't wake up in the middle of the night because she will scream at the top of her lungs and wake up the whole building. * This troper once made the mistake of going on the Jaws ride at Universal when he was 7. And sitting on the seat next to the water. After the shark lunged out of the water, I crawled over my family to the other side. Now, I love the ride, of course. * When I was young I saw a trailer for a spider movie on TV. It showed a bunch of ostriches standing around and then showed hundreds of giant spiders. I was already was afraid of spiders and became afraid of ostriches due to the fact I was afraid they woud turn into giant spiders(pretty stupid,I know). I got over my fear of spiders and ostriches, but now I am afraid of things like Megalodon and Giant Squid.

* The other day, a friend of mine asked me to proofread her story for our class summative. I did, and it was your typical {{CSI}} episode on paper. It was the story of an albino girl who's family got murdered on the eve of her birthday. Anyway, the real NightmareFuel part is when the girl is thinking about the plain white cake her parents made her, and how it was similar to herself in ways. Then she goes and says something along the lines of if we can eat the cake, who's going to eat me. It just gave me these terrifying images of her parents eating her like they ate the cake. * This is going to sound really weird but bear with me: Hello Project! It's not necessarily the [[IdolSinger girl groups]] that scare me, it's their age. Still with me? I'm not fazed at how young they are (I'm the same age as some of them) but it scares me that every group almost always has the same songwriter/producer named Tsunku. I think it's the idea that this one middle aged guy is paying attention to and producing every single girl in this "Project" he created to manufacture IdolSingers. Oh, and did I mention he looks like ''this?[[http://www.generasia.com/wiki/File:Tsunku.jpg]]'' * This troper, as a curious fourteen-year-old, decided to have a read about [[JohnFKennedy JFK's]] assassination: 'How did he die? Gunshot wound to the head? Nasty stuff. Hey, what's this? Someone filmed it? Oh, I guess it's really blurry and you can't really see...oh holy shit you can see the blood.' Added bonus? He then read about his autopsy. Yeah, they had pictures. Gory. Pictures. He had some nightmares involving zombies that night, which is spooky, seeing as Black Ops came out a few months later... * One halloween, when this trope was about 5-6, went to this defiantly-not-normal-but-not-to-scary house. The person there was talking about this person who was killed by someone with a chainsaw, and the (fake) skeleton hung over the garage door. At the end of long speech I heard a chainsaw. She quickly gave us our treat, and I was wondering "What's going on?" when HOLY SHIT A CRAZY POTATO BAG WIELDING CHAINSAW PERSON!!!!!!! Go to me running across the street screaming at the top of my lungs pissing-self. Every since then I've avoided that house. * Back in the late 80's, was a youngster with my family in the Southern California town of Victorville. One evening during winter it was snowing lightly (had been heavier earlier), and me, my brother and our two friends were outside playing. The sky was overcast and almost dark, with a very dark yellow-gray color, and the soft white light of the street lights. Suddenly everything was lit up by a greenish light that brightened from nothing, changed to yellowish-green, yellow and went back to green, then brightened more for less than a split second before fading completely (it all happened in the space of three seconds). There was no wind, no cars, and no noise other than what we were making. To this day I have no idea what caused it, and being utterly silent it was ''very'' chilling. * [[http://a3.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-aksnc6/185979_10150118930594304_549324303_6079116_6768880_n.jpg This troper's friend's art project.]] [[NightmareFace It glows in the dark]]. * After driving home from a movie, this troper and his father stepped

out into the snow under a full moon, in the middle of the night. Looking up, we both saw the full circle, but something was off about it. Whatever the real cause was, what we saw was a strange halo of white light around the moon, almost ghostly, that descended down to the ground. This troper, while very creeped out, was intrigued and wondered what could be causing it. His father, with an intense sense of dread, seemed honestly horrified by it, and I assume had the same feelings I had; as if the moon itself was going to fall, or some other cosmic event was going on right before us. We had no idea what could cause that, but it was just so bizzare and strange, yet horrific, that we couldn't get a wink of sleep the whole night. ** That's actually a completely natural phenomenon that I can't remember the name for now, involving the light from the moon refracting off ice crystals in the atmosphere. So don't worry, it's not some kind of portend or doom (probably). * There was a local business who decided to advertise to [[TotallyRadical hip youngsters]], and so the owner learned how to skateboard and was going to enter a skateboarding competition to try and raise awareness of his business. However, he wanted to look younger, so he had a makeup artist put a fake face on that shaved off the wrinkles. He got up to the competition, and shortly after he started a grind, he fell and got a cut on his head. It wasn't big, but the cut was enough to rip off part of the face, and the blood started to get absorbed into the material. By the time the medics stated to treat him, it seriously looked like his face went through a meat grinder. Best part? He flashed a huge smile at all of the kids when he got up. I couldn't sleep for days. * Although he thankfully didn't do it, what this one kid was going to do with scissors at my school seriously disturbed this troper. [[spoiler: [[BodyHorror He was going to chop his nose off]].]] Just the mental image of a [[spoiler: face with a bloody mess for a nose]] was enough to make me wince in agony everytime something sharp came close to my face. [[SlasherSmile And he did it all with a delightful grin on his face.]] * Mirrors. Just mirrors creep me out. Though I do dislike them, lately I find myself doing ridiculous things to try and trick my own reflection. If I ever succeed bricks will be shat. * A few minutes ago, I looked out of my window and found that everything was completely still. It was kind of creepy. Thankfully, the wind picked up a tiny bit. * This tropette has a condition called [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Raynaud%27s_phenomenon Raynaud's phenomenon]], which causes my fingers and toes to turn [[UndeathlyPallor blue, purple or white]] from lack of circulation. My toes especially tend to look [[UncannyValley like all they need is a toe tag]] when I get an attack, and it's amazing how little it takes for my hands and feet to get cold. I wonder how that would [[FetishRetardant look to a]] [[FootFocus foot fetishist]]... * This troper has a problems with a few things: ** Complete darkness. As in, inability to see anything more than a few inches away. ** Semi-darkness. As in, silhouettes, but nothing else.

*** He walked out of his bathroom once, late a night, to see what looked like the silhouette of a head in a window, having read about the SlenderManMythos that day. He was on the second floor of the building. ** A complete lack of background noise. Seriously, it freaks him out to just... not hear anything at all, unless there's a very good reason he shouldn't hear anything, like earplugs or a really well-insulated room. ** This troper is also able to scare himself with some of the faces he makes. * This troper was on holiday in France, aged about 13-14. I had to take the rubbish down to the bins at the end of the road so it would be picked up by the garbage men. It was about 10 o'clock, and it was dark. There was a vineyard along the road, so on the way back to the house my family was renting I decided to walk through it. About half way through I turned to see the biggest dog I'd ever seen standing about seven foot away. It was screaming ''scarlet'', with a white face and completely black eyes. And it was ''snarling''. When I ran, it took me about thirty seconds to cover the half mile walk. The dog had looked completely demonic, I'm not even joking. When I dragged my parents out to look in the vineyard the next day, the dog was gone. I never forgot it though, and there have been several occasions that I've been convinced it's not too far away from me.

NightmareFuelStationAttendant * ''"Female rapist? [[BigYes THAT SOUNDS]] [[CrazyAwesome AWESOME!]]"'' That was [[{{Tropers.EPIC}} this Troper]] right there in in 2009 during a Humanities class. What? [[RapeIsOkayWhenItsFemaleOnMale It's the same as making the first move a little]] ''[[RapeIsOkayWhenItsFemaleOnMale too]]'' [[RapeIsOkayWhenItsFemaleOnMale quickly...]] * This troper's aunt is made of nightmare fuel. She has three different names that she uses for different moods and none of us are really sure which one is real. She talks to everyone like she's reading Mother Goose stories to them. She decorates her house with the heads of game animals (she isn't a hunter.) She gets extremely upset over small issues (table manners, being called 'ant', etc.) Not to mention my uncle was afraid to leave his dog alone with her for fear that she would hurt it. And this is a man who's skilled in several forms of martial arts, and just an all-around badass. My best friend's child-self probably also counts. I've seen her journals/folders from elementary school and most of her stories involve death. The pictures are pretty demented and sometimes straight-up gory. * This troper admits that he often drew pictures like these, most notably a huge cave filled with monstrous bats with human remains on the floor, an ''enormous'' monstrous bat with mangled, bloody human limbs hanging from its mouth (yes, this troper had a bat fixation), and a painting of his brother and sister kicking around his severed head, with the decapitated body in the background, and lots of blood. * My nickname is 'The Serial killer'. It stems from a number of things. For one, I've always drawn graphic artwork since year one at

school. I always wrote gory horror stories since year one as well. I've always been a rather morbid person and supposedly I have a 'killer's walk' (I seem to walk rather rigidly sometimes in a manner which some find creepy and others funny.) I also listen to death metal 24/7 and have a terrible knack for using black comedy and DeadBabyComedy. * Anybody who went to school with this troper will remember his infamous Cap Man series of stickman comics. I found some of them a while back, and worried myself. * This troper is currently (April-May of '09) starring in a ten-minute play that has him playing Tony, a man with a fetishistic love of his couch. Belly-down, glasses askew, humping and fervently kissing a couch's cushions has been one of the most fun and liberating experiences of my life. * This troper would probably make a pretty poor babysitter as he has a strong fascination for scary children's stories. He also has a fondness for telling others that some children might be {{Artificial Human}}s posing as normal kids or changelings created to replace children kidnapped by fairies. * [[{{Nomic}} This troper]] had (and still has) a habit of drawing various things, from comics to pictures of dinosaurs and aliens to war-related pictures. Sometimes they get quite freaky. * This troper wrote viciously squick-filled erotic fanfiction at the tender age of 14, eventually quitting before 17. Looking back, there are four and only four words I can say: "God I'm fucked up" ** This troper always wondered if it's legal for minors to read erotic fiction they wrote themselves. *** That would have been an ''excellent'' question for this one up to a few months ago. **** You can take as precedent the fact that the actress who starred in the 60's film version of Romeo and Juliet was [[strike: [[UrbanLegend not]]]] allowed to attend the premiere, due to the fact that she was underage and the film featured several brief instances of topless nudity. ''Her own!'' * [[DarkInsanity13 This troper]] has a fairly dark and twisted mind, but usually keeps it under wraps for the most part (just don't get her angry; her way of stress relief is imagining people's heads exploding). However, there was one time in a Sociology/Psychology/Anthropology class where the class was discussing the pros and cons of having children. Everyone got into groups and drew pictures and captions and that, then presented their ideas to everyone else. So, this troper and her partner (poor guy), went up and listed off things. On the pro side, her partner had put "watching them grow"...on the con side, this troper bluntly (and innocently, really!) "watching them die", marked with a semi-cartoony gravestone. The silence and sudden awkwardness was enough to tell this troper that she'd obviously said something disturbing. After finishing and sitting down, she turned to her partner and asked if she was a morbid person. Answer? "Yeah." Truthfully, it was from watching so many shows and that where parents got depressed and grief-stricken when their children died, with them lamenting how much it hurt to see them die before themselves.

* This troper, at the tender age of four, entered Kindergarten. We kept 'journals' which were little blank books to draw a picture in every day and the teacher would label our drawing. Around Thanksgiving I drew a big brown scribble, labeled by the the teacher as 'turkey'. Okay, normal enough, except the drawing for the next day was a gigantic red scribble titled 'turkey blood'. I still have the little book somewhere. It took quite a few explanations before I figured out why other people found it creepy. * Not ThisTroper but ThisTroper's Friend created a 4 year old alter ego named "Joey" who would draw the most disturbing pictures, including one wherein ThisTroper was killed so that "Joey" could wear his "perfect hair". Needless to say, Joey was ThisTroper's personal Nightmare Fuel Station Attendant! ** And now another person will make it worse by suggesting that this "Joey" might've been somewhat {{Yandere}}. Feel free to kill me for this. * Back before Columbine, this troper did 'How to blow up Local Mall' as a 'How To' assignment in high school. Probably affected by the opinion that the nature of all the school's assignments were third grade in nature. This troper is lucky he wasn't tossed in the padded room. ** Right before that event this Troper was planning to make a Duke Nukem 3D level that featured the layout of his high school and fighting the aliens laying siege to it. That idea got axed for obvious reasons. * [[MaureenMacDonald This troper's]] mother works as an art teacher for children with emotional difficulties. You can bet she got a ''lot'' of these after 9/11. * This troper once acted as one. The class was to divide into groups and draw pictures/list the good and bad things about having kids. On the positive side, she had "watching them grow up"...while on the other side, she had watching them die. She thought it was innocent enough, however, the teacher, the class, and her partner didn't seem to think so. * This troper is prone to freaking people out with random, extremely out of place, macabre observations. I also appearently have a creepy laugh and am prone to staring at people. * A kid this troper met once talked casually about how he wanted to go back in time, kill Da Vinci and take credit for the Mona Lisa. He was going to do the same thing for Hamlet, Star Wars, and moon rockets. * This troper drew bloody massacres when she was a child, often adding the red fountains of blood with glee, which disturbed her mother quite a bit. She also had a morbid fascination about dead people, drawing elaborate funeral rituals for her characters. It's only gotten worse as she grew older. (Exploding heads are fun to draw!) * This troper has disturbed several people with his looks and laugh. In every photo he has ever taken, people have claimed he looks like a serial killer because he refused to smile. After a horrible Thanksgiving break, someone made the mistake of asking him how it went. He proceeded to laugh like a psycho. He was begged to never laugh like that again by 6 fellow students. * This troper drew Sally and Zero from ''TheNightmareBeforeChristmas''

all over her name card in the third(?) grade. Seeing all those stitched-up body parts freaked ''myself'' out; fortunately no one seemed to notice. In high school I doodled a very Gothic cover for ''The Scarlet Letter'' which deeply unnerved one (presumably very Christian) after school tutor; he nervously asked me to put it away. These days I unnerve my roommate with a rather evil laugh. * When [[JillBug this troper]] was seven years old, she won a contest to design an anti-smoking poster and have it made into a real one. Her design showed a giant cigarette standing in the doorway of a family house, with someone taking its hat and coat and the caption "Would you invite a serial killer into your house?" The judges loved it and she got second prize, but her family found the poster so creepy they refused to put it up in the house or show anyone else. * This troper loves monsters. He often likes to make up monsters and draw pictures of them. Most of which come out extremely twisted and disturbing- almost Tim Burton-esque. * [[{{Tropers/Hazuki}} Hazuki]] mostly keeps to herself, but has been known to creep out onlookers and family with her grasp of just how badly the world's political, economic, and human rights institutions are fucked up. This doesn't make her this trope so much as it makes damn near everyone else in the country ignorant. On the other hand, she has *also* scared the Hell out of onlookers with her habit of going from calm to coldly, incredibly angry without a layover in berserker territory first...and then there's her habit of talking about how so-and-so are going to Hell, describing some of what she would do to them if she were the Devil, and so on. This is not helped by her being six feet tall, constantly moody, and unapproachable. Has been compared to "a chapstick dyke Alucard [of Hellsing fame] in jeans and a t-shirt" on occasion. ** It's nice to see some intelligent people in the world. Also, [[{{Tropers/HG131}} I]] second the descriptions and the sudden mood change. ** [[FilledeMarius This bi female troper]] finds you [[FetishFuel extremely attractive]]. * I have once scared someone on a fourm just by saying, "good night, and may the angels protect you from the evil within while you sleep" in a fancy text. He said it scared him because he was an atheist. So an atheist scared an atheist with text that sounded religious. Also, I can't really draw at all, but if I could, I bet I would've scared a lot of people, I always had weird things in mind that I wanted to draw. ** Is it wrong that I just sniggered at the idea of an atheist being afraid there were no angels to protect him? * [[RiL This troper]]'s favorite thing about New York City is the hunchbacked, hook-nosed old man who busks in the subway banging out bizarre music on a keyboard and commanding a virtual army of scary little dolls that move in time with the music. He is ''straight'' out of a Victorian children's story and inspires, in this troper, a reaction akin to [[InvaderZim Zim]]'s cry of "THE MADNEEEESSSS". * People seem to find this troper's stare creepy.I wonder why? * After being angered by a classmate, this troper drew a cute cartoony picture depicting herself beating said classmate's face into a desk,

complete with a puddle of blood and the classmate's teeth being knocked out. She could honestly not see why others found it disturbing. To make things stranger, this was drawn when she was a high school senior, and really should have been old enough to know better. * When This Troper was little, she spent a lot of time drawing. A large portion of those drawing depicted dragons, snakes, and wolves trapping and/or devouring bunnies and mice. But mostly bunnies. She also had a creepy fascination with the digestive system, and would draw all these cross section type things of dragons and other large predators. When seeing a trailer for The Ring, and the bit about drawings, her mom commented, "She should see some of your stuff." She also has some art of enslaved, crying animals carrying heavy loads tacked up on my wall. Fun. * This Troper's mum is an Attendant in that she'll mention horrible things along with more fun ones. For example, after a graduation a few years ago, some got drunk and one almost drowned in the pool. Mom suggested that Troper's brother shouldn't drink too much so he fell into the pool, with a big smile on her face. This Troper only laughed at that because she didn't know about the drowning incident. Funnily enough, the Troper herself thinks that she should be the Attendant of her class - she was pretty upset at hearing from another classmate that one of the other girls would be more likely to murder somebody than Troper, when it's the other way around... but on the other hand it should be High Octane Attendant as she knows about it herself sometimes she ends up hitting herself or dragging in her hair as selfpunishment for imagining her murdering her best friends. Granted, there's always BerserkerTears, but still... * This troper was kind of accidently an attendant. She didn't intend to freak people out, but she was a very literal minded and unfortunately world-wise child. So when asked in second grade to draw a picture of what could happen if a person didn't wear a seatbelt, she drew a very realistic picture of a car crash, with flames from the ruptured gas tank, blood, body parts, someone wedged halfway out the windshield, etc. The next year, when asked to draw a tornado, she drew a tornado devastating a landscape, complete with sucking up unfortunate people and animals who had been in the house. Hey, if you don't want to see what it really looks like, don't ask for it! * [[{{Nomic}} This troper]] likes doodle stuff. Mostly his drwaings tend to be completely harmless, with just abstract shapes, stick figures, or if he has more time in his hands cartoony dinosaurs, aliens or demons. But occasionally he does some pretty creepy stuff, ranging from nuclear explosions and meteor impacts to people that are not quite human (often missing eyes or just having empty eyesockets) with creepy expressions, and various Lovecraft-inspired things (often Nyrlathotep on one of his many forms). * This troper was the only person in his literature class to attempt to justify The Lottery. "They're trying to stone her to death." "Yes, but there must be a reason." Apparently, I smiled when I said that, and it was quite creepy. * [[ShapeshifterTheTroper This troper]] has drawn, among other things, [[BiologicalMashup a cross between a fox and a rabbit]] feasting on

the flesh of a freshly killed deer-like animal (not very detailed, thank goodness), a face with the locations of the eyes and the mouth switched (ending with two mouths and one large eye), and an otherwise very attractive boy with no eyes. Not empty sockets. Just flesh. * This troper, who tends to act cheerful and empty-headed in public, then disturbs people by drawing unusual things. For example, a giant Rube Goldberg-style machine ending with a line of people walking into the mouth of an immensely fat man with several rows of teeth, a headless, winged saxophonist carrying a stopsign, an aztec-esque sketch of people bowing down to something gigantic, tentacled, and shadowy, and me with a USB flash drive stuck in the side of my head. * [[{{Noaqiyeum}} This troper]] has started creeping ''himself'' out with his own artwork - very few other people get to see his notebooks, but they've started including stuff like a classical doctor teaching his students about the anatomy of the torso using a ''screaming patient with his skin peeled back and tacked into place''. ** This troper loves her anatomy lesson sketches <3 I may be the only person I know of who not only really digs anatomical venus figures, rather than being creeped out by them, but would also totally spring for owning one. * Once, in her younger years, [[{{Griffin}} this troper]] decided to tell her little sister a bedtime story. It involved the morbid death of a character from a TV show they watched back then. When she got to the part where he was stuck behind a truck filled with boulders, she started..."And out popped..." Her sister finished happily with "His ribs?" Griffin, shocked, said, "No! Boulders from the truck!" She then described in detail how he was crushed and how his friends dug him out, finally finding his crushed hand...she's mellowed a little now. * Just the other day, this troper decided to draw a collage of creatures who live in a dimension ruled by nightmare fuel. Among the creepier inhabitants are a spider with an extra pair of fangs on top of its head, a sort of elongated frog that looks like it has various spikes and bone shards protruding violently from its skin, and what looks like a cross between a starfish and a harlequin fetus. Needless to say, when this troper's girlfriend saw this page, she suggested I make another one populated entirely by cute animals. So he did...and then began devising ways that these new animals could be even more dangerous than anything on the other page. * This Troper (who edits so much he should probably get his own page) has always been like this. A good deal of the creatures he has drawn look most like skinned dogs. Highlights of my career include drawing another kids house on fire back in third grade (that got me suspended :) ), several tentacled plague-beasts, a murderous axe-wielding bride ''a la'' Haunted Mansion and a bloodstained little girl with a knife in one hand and a teddy bear in the other. * [[{{Laburnum}} This troper]] (who can't draw at ''all'') has a speech issue of some sort where, instead of saying the word she means, she'll say the word she was thinking of before she spoke. This has resulted is sentances such as "Can you please hand me the knife...I mean the hairbrush." It dosen't help that she's a complete KnifeNut. She also has yet to learn that "Maxwell's Silver Hammer" and "Getting Away With Murder" are probably not the best songs to sing public.

** And her little sister seems to be turning into one of these. In between her stories about fluffy bunnies and kittens she'll tell stories about people falling to their deaths or getting eaten alive. * This Troper, when she was in second grade, made lunch place mats for the kindergarten class. It was Halloween. She didn't know why, but her teacher decided that, after seeing her pictures, she should hand off the lunch mats to someone else to make. She grew up and continued making evil pictures that made her classmates pale and her art teacher ask the school councilor to talk to her. * This Troper, at the age of 9, freaked out many, many people in a supermarket by hiding behind a rack of clothes and, when asked why I was there, proceded to tell them (in great detail) how I was hiding from the family of the people I'd murded. Combined with my extremily spooky stare&grin, and my ability to hid in the tiniest gap when security or staff tried to look for me, I've made quite a few people scream. * I was once asked to let my teeth show when I smiled for a photo. Apparently, my expression was scary enough that I was immediately asked by the exact same person to never do it again. It was a group photo for choir, too, so it's not like it was one of my friends cracking a joke, either. * This Troper's older brothers had down pictures of monsters when they were little, and thus got me into it. Now, the monsters weren't too creepy, no (they usually looked like cheesy-looking worms, birds, or even circles with a face and horns). The problem was they were attacking stick figures. The even '''bigger''' problem was that there was sure to be people burning, bleeding, andmy favorite back thensome guy with his head stuck on one horn and his body stuck on another, still screaming for help. ''Shudder...'' Sometimes I wonder if I had a messed up childhood... Good thing was, they were always drawn with pencil... * A childhood bout of schizophrenia is seriously the only way this pacifist vegetarian troper can explain her (otherwise comfortable and normal) childhood being dominated by an obsession with torture, oppression, and death. The most iconic example was a drawing of a machine designed to torture people to death in horrific ways with industrial efficiency - beaten, cut, scalded, dismembered, skinned, suffocated, and burned alive. ''[pause]'' Well, see ya. * While very mild compared to some of the people on here, in elementary school this troper would often talk about an imaginary character named Bob the Happy Gerbil. After a while, he got bored of that, and started talking about Bob the Unhappy Gerbilcube. Bob was unhappy because he was a cube. Bob was a cube because he fell into a trash compactor. * More like FetishFuel station attendant, but that doesn't have a Troper Tales page. Yet. Apparently [[{{This-guy}} I]] draw girls with more cleavage than I intend to show. * The kid I babysit loves Disney princess,Batman, and kittens. But in her spare time, she sings about the devil and murder in the most adorable voice ever. And she is only three. * This troper still hasn't got the hang of what creeps people out and what doesn't. She is still learning to hold civil conversations with

normal people after a 3 year period (between the ages of 11 and 15) spent either silent or yelling at people. She fears only deep water, and has no squick response to anything except incest. She keeps forgetting other people do when she brings up topics of conversation. Coupled with her fangs - she basically, for all intents and purposes, looks like a vampire when she smiles - this leads to a lot of "no, really, can you stop doing that?". * This troper has a ten year old brother who is adorable, even when he goes on about horrific murders and BodyHorror as well as demons and insects. The worst thing is that he also is [[NoIndoorVoice very loud]] so you cannot shut him out and have to listen to him go on about all the stuff. This troper is very, very happy that she is very hard to terrify. * Most of [[ARandomSerf A Random Serf's]] college friends agree that he is Nightmare Fuel (literally, in at least one instance). His creature doodles and Spore creations come off as scary even when he is going for cute, and his rubberface (particularly any smile that shows teeth) and certain adopted voices do not help matters. * This troper had a day sitter before and after school that he didn't get along with. The year after he left, he was persuaded by his English teacher to enter a Halloween short story contest, with the winning entries published by the school newspaper. Not confident he would win (he felt there were MUCH better writers in his class at the time,) he crafted a story about being led by aliens to the sitter's house, where he was ambushed and eventually killed the lead alien, revealing it to be said sitter. The story included accurate descriptions of her car, her house including her exact address, and a bastardized version of her name. It won. Oops. * [[PurplePantherGirl This troper]] drew a picture of a demon, she draws it alot, but for some reason this paticular picture gave her younger brother nightmares for ''months''. She's not a paticularly good artist when it comes to animals (the demon is a scarlet dog/wolf thing with a white face, black eyes and no mouth btw) the aforsaid demon had it's face pressed up against a window in which a family could be seen... in the demon's eyes you could see what it was thinking... which happened to be it murdering the family. Lovely. * As children, my brother and I created a little universe with our Legos. The protagonist was a rich merchant/necromancer that sold his hands to the devil in return for immense dark powers, which he then used to create twelve rather nightmarish skeleton guards. He also has a penchant for living in some of the most menacing-looking fortresses that can be made by a 7-11 year-old. Of course, after having seen our early drawings of hideous mutants and various malicious entities with similarly evil magic powers and weapons, it's no surprise that the Legos turned out how they did. It's also not surprising that in middle school I took a heavy interest in toxic plants, demonology, and cryptozoology. All of these previous interests manifest in some way in a book I am now writing at age 19, a central character of which is identical to that evil little Lego man from years ago (except he has hands). * [[SovietKitty This troper]] really doesn't realize she's doing anything out of the ordinary. Really! She doesn't see anything creepy

about licking pudding off of butcher knives. Other people do. * This Troper knows a thirteen-year-old girl obsessed with Sonic and Pokemon who is immature to the point of stupidity, thought a thesaurus was a kind of dinosaur, and tried to bite through a rock. She loves writing stories about Sonic characters that can transform into Pokemon, or Pokemon OCs in Warriors-style clans... and in one of those stories, has lately been cheerfully going on about two new characters who are the product of date-rape (one of the characters was unconscious when they, well, mated) between a forty-year-old female and her ''eleven-year-old nephew''. MASSIVE squick for This Troper and her [saner] friends. * This Troper loves to draw realistically, and does many art projects in her English class. By the end of the year, there were three complete "works": one was a character book of the dead in RomeoAndJuliet, another illustrated the punishment of [[TheOdyssey Penelope's suitors]], and the last was of the travelings of a certain piece of [[FrankensteinsMonster body horror]]. * This troper likes drawing, and was one of those brats who would get done with her schoolwork obscenely early and then loll around at her desk, looking bored or drawing. She decided one day that this time could be better spent by practicing drawing things more realistically. Somehow, this turned into drawing ''horrific injuries'' more realistically. The fact that I made no attempt to hide the drawings coupled with the few times a day that I would pause, poke at my arm for a few moments to see just how far the radius would protrude if it were to be catastrophically splintered made for a few strange looks from the surrounding classmates (and one talk with my amazing physics teacher that pretty much amounted to, "So there's a guy with half of his face burned off on the back of this test you turned in. ...You're not gonna set the school on fire, are you? ...Are you sure? Okay, go back to your seat.") * In retrospect, I must have been quite the nightmare fuel station attendant as a small girl. I had what can only be described as a fetish for being eaten alive, and often drew vivid, colorful crayon pictures of topless monsters with too many arms eating small animals. I had a fascination for classical paintings of hell and executions, and hummed and talked to myself at a near constant rate. When I played, the stories I told myself were often about orphans escaping horrible, gruesome fates, and then dying anyway. I was a CreepyChild, full out. * In school, I had this substitute teacher. Former marine. Real tough guy, liked to tell the class stories. Well he told us this one thing, about Nuclear Weapons. He said that Russia had three nuclear warheads for every state in the United States, and then proceeded to tell us exactly where they would probably strike. One kid asked "Would that hit us?" to which he responded, "Oh yes, here in (My Town) we'd be killed instantly". He thought this was a delightful anecdote. ** Similarly, at Space Camp, this troper's team had a StepfordSmiler officer from Air Force Space Command come in to talk to us about the military's activities in space. At one point, he mentioned that he knew the Range Safety Officer at Cape Canaveral, and proceeded to very cheerfully detail how his friend's job is to push a button blowing up

the space shuttle should anything go wrong shortly after launch. Still smiling, he says "And with Challenger, my friend unfortunately had to blow them into SMALLER pieces." NightmareFuel. * This troper's little brother had a hard time a few nights ago, and needed somebody to sleep in the bottom bunk of his bunk bed (why he has one, I really don't know). I crawl into the bunk and start having a little slideshow of... things, when all of a sudden, I get a chill. I open my eyes, and, out of the top of my eye, is a floating head. HilarityEnsues. * This troper has improved a bit, but has trouble realizing that sometimes what she finds interesting, funny, or even [[NightmareFetishist cute]] will creep other people out. Suddenly talking about the medical application of maggots or the idea of anthropomorphic parasitic wasps that target catgirls, linking ''ChoppingBlock'', ''ContemplatingReiko'' or GrotesqueCute pictures with little or no warning, spontaneously singing songs like "Old Macdonald had a farm ee-ei-ee-ei-oh/and on that farm he sold children into slavery to demons, ee-ei-ee-ei-oh"... yeah. She's more than once tried to make an EnfantTerrible or CreepyChild TabletopGame character without realizing that such a character or what they went through to ''get'' them like that might be a bit much for other players or the GM. * This troper draws peculiar pictures in her copybook when listening to boring university lectures. Things like decaying but shambling corpses in tattered Nazi uniforms, knives with blood dripping from them, bat-winged demons... oh, and Cthulhu. She likes drawing Cthulhu. The other half of her drawings is pure MushroomSamba level wackiness. She thinks all of this is extremely funny. * [[LoneHoundoom This troper]] is considered one at his school, due to his habit of making extremely specific, graphic, and totally empty and playful I swear to God, death threats when he gets P.O'd. And he has the most intimidating glare ever. * This troper, who is usually extremely happy, laid back, optimistic, and hippie-ish has a tendency to freak out her sister. People seem to think just because I usually wear a peace sign necklace, that I can't be a nightmare fetishist. I seem to forget that not everyone wants to hear about the Tailypo story and/or things written on the wall in blood. Since my parents would ban me from ever getting on the computer again if I said a word about it to them, I usually don't bring up nightmare fuel. But sometimes I forget that even though my sister likes TV tropes, she doesn't think that nightmare fuel is a good thing. * [[{{Dark Lady Celebrian}} This troper]] ENJOYS freaking people out. I once bit myself to see what human tastes like and often brag about that to other people, who then get these stunned, disbelieving looks on their face. I tend to throw random gory statements into the middle of conversations and I like hissing, growling, or roaring at people (who in turn back away QUICK). I also enjoy making vampire noises at people and talking about eating souls. ** 'Vampire noises'? *** Hissing, mostly * I'm a GM and horror is my favorite genre. I consider it a wasted

session if the players don't say "O.k. you can stop now" and turn on the overhead lights (we play by lamplight). * This troper played fairy funerals in her garden. It was only this year that I accidentally dug them up. Little holes in the ground lined with flower petals and sticks to keep the roof up, with a tiny painted stick of wood wrapped in leaves for the corpse... with a face, and hair, and usually a dress and a hat. They had mourners. And grave goods. Other fairies would kill themselves on top of their graves. This was the same year I buried a stuffed animal in the snow inside another stuffed animal. And now, as a (young) adult, I have decidedly odd interests (why the hell would I be here if I didn't?) and sometimes have a tendency to creep people out by being oblivious to where "normal" conversation topics end. The utility of wire ties from the point of view of a serial killer? Probably not a regular peer conversation topic. * [[{{Crion87}} This troper]] doesn't know whether he's this or CloudCuckooLander, but can be prone to imagining his peaceful LandDownUnder surroundings turned into SceneryGorn complete with invading enemies, bandits and who knows what else - maybe it's something to do with his anger problems. Doesn't help matters that many of his favourite games (KKND, [[{{Fallout3}} Fallout 3]]) are set AfterTheEnd (maybe one of his Asperger Syndrome fixations is AfterTheEnd type stuff...) * As a replacement for scary stories at my campout, I pretended to go batshit insane. While making as many cultural references as I could (none of which were gotten by anyone, which made it scarier). I permanently mentally scarred at least three people. * this troper doodles creatures that include stitches, claws, fangs, tentacles, stalk-eyes, spikes, and scythe limbs. His most doodled images are an Evil, detailed "pacman", and "roots". And when he gets serious, people laugh because they think i'm being silly about the detailed torture i have planned for them as i usually am. * This troper loves sunshine and fluffy little kittens, knits scarves, goes out to lunch with Grandma at least once a week, and cries at the end of Disney movies. This very same troper also spends a disturbing amount of time writing stories about things like spiders hollowing out a guy's head while he's still fully conscious, or about zombies eating everything in sight. When this troper draws, she draws eldritch abomination-type critters. It unnerves her friends mightily. * This troper had tendancies towards this as a kid, he was also artistic and a great storyteller. One time he re-enacted the 9/11 attacks in Microsoft Flight Simulator. Another example is a comic series he wrote in which an AuthorAvatar got bored and managed to end up tracking down and ''hanging out'' with the devil and the grim reaper. (the hanging out with supernatural entities due to boredom would later be stolen by [[HaruhiSuzumiya Nagaru Tanigawa.]] I have witnesses to prove I came up with it first!) It was well recived among friends but unnerved adults due to things like ideologically sensetive material (Satan and the residents of hell were portrayed as the ''good guys'') and the fact that most of the cast was based off real people and the fight scenes (due to the devil and reaper being hunted by

angels) usually ended with the destruction of a real life location and many civilain casualties often including the death or painful, possible crippling injury of at least one character based off a real person in a graphic, bloody way. (and it was all depicted too lightheartedly for a story in which death is permanent) It wasn't really a bad comic but it was just a bit too creepy for someone my age to be drawing and writing. * This troper's third grade assignment: Write a diary written by someone suffering the colonial winters. My character was severely clinically depressed with issues with her parents and a bad family and livelihood, and eventually died of freezing ''halfway through her diary entry''. The hero/heroine in any of this troper's third-grade works usually ended up dying somehow - at the end of a whimsical poem about a bee who learned to carry the mail (don't ask), the bee died of exhaustion... * This troper had a LARP-like thing going on from 9 to about 12. The other kids were half-angels, nature spirits, mages, etc. This troper was a necromancer that caused rot as his primary ability rather than raising the dead. Between that and his loudly and consistently playing LargeHam , UpToEleven NightmareFuel villains in the middle of the playground, he got a strange reputation... * Let's see... This troper does several things that has convinced the whole level that he is mentally disturbed in more ways than one. ** Firstly, he's a tinkerer, and has built rudimentary pen guns. Combine that with the fact that quite a lot of people have a rudimentary knowledge of pressure points ([[NoodleIncident Don't ask why]]) and an overestimation of how much power a pen gun has. Add in this troper's love for shooting himself just to keep himself awake, and we've got rumours flying around about this troper. ** {{Cloudcuckoolander}} + CorruptTheCutie. For example, this troper started talking to a friend on the way home that he had corrupted. Somehow, this troper started talking about why he exclaimed "[[WhoseLineIsItAnyway I'm watching animal porn!]]" whenever asked what he was doing. Suddenly, this troper started wondering whether elephants could engage in auto-fellatio. Followed by an imagined example of how elephants would sound like during orgasm. A few moments later, this troper mentioned [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel how a man died of internal bleeding after receiving anal sex from a horse]]. Then he asked out loud to his friend what would happen if someone got anal sex from an elephant. To quote himself, "Just imagine feeling pulsating flesh where your currently squished internal organs once were. How long would you survive anyway? And would you be in pain or pleasure once you died? Or would it be both?" This troper got punched before he could wonder about how elephants have sex. * [[AstraKiseki This troper]]'s mother is a very, very covert NightmareFuelStationAttendant. The family knows just how fucked up her thoughts can be, such as how do you make a guy cry? [[spoiler:Mention filleting of the balls]] and discussions about diseases and such lines as 'wouldn't it be horrible if...' But most people think of her as the sweetest woman around. * ThisTroper had a phase of drawing pictures with recurring motives of stickmen falling to death, melting suns/moons, crying houses... you

get the point, right? And there was that suicide-themed forum avatar... * Ahhh... The stories this Troper could tell. Well, I'll settle with the fact that noone hangs out with this troper for fear that they'll make her laugh. And the troper's best friend admitted to BileFascination of her thought process, and was considering interviewing her for the school newspaper. This troper, being GenreSavvy, decided to opt for {{Missed moment of awesome}}, just because she still has something of a soul left. * This Troper is the official CloudCuckooLander NightmareFuelStationAttendant bassist of her band. Who can sing backwards. * This troper manages to simultaniously amuse and seriously disturb his friends through a combination of "misunderstanding" the way the real world works and coming up with explanations for things that make no sense at all, some of which quite nightmarish. Also my "stalker smile". Which is my favorite facial expression, with the possible expression of "angryfaec >:[" * [[Tropers.CalamityJane This Troper]] has become increasingly more aware of her jokes and other light-hearted fun-having could come off as very disturbing to others (such as happily declaring that she has discovered that [[AuthorAppeal men look cute when wearing suits]] or being flat-out masochistic when making fun of herself). She blames the Decepticons. * This Troper reads a lot of random facts in both books and on the internet, so many times a topic will remind her of a fact she learned, and she'll voice it. Stares of horror often ensue. * Somehow This Troper loved a psycho laugh, and tried to use it herself. It worked, creeps her friends and then her classmates begged her to stop laughing like that. She don't know why, but she just can't. Oh, also she loves to made up creepypastas and drawings that is full of {{Gorn}}, and creeps out one of her best friend. One example is a story that she made, once upon a time there's a girl who has a really itchy eye... ** For the love of god, please stop. [[EyeScream I know what's the ending would be...]] * [[Tropers.AwesomeZombie22 This Troper]] is a {{Yangire}}, NightmareFetishist, has a PsychoticSmirk and is LaughingMad. I am a writer and artist, and one idea that I had for my first story was that a character rips out her uncle's eye and something that I kept was that a robot tears said character's father's brain out and places it on his head. If I become angered, I invision the hated object in my head as being torn apart violently. That's the thing I find most unsettling about myself, I don't explode with anger, I think of blood and death and fantasize about killing. I don't do it in real life, though, I'm not completely insane. ** ...are you my long lost twin? * This troper was once this by accident. Friend: "Have you ever smelled burning hair or flesh?" Her: "Once." (Friend gets panicked look) Her: "Don't worry, it was my own." (Accident involving a candle when she was younger.) * This Troper has two of this. Apparantly, once when I was a kid, I

was asked to do a drawing assignment. When I handed the paper in, it showed me as the killer of a demoinc creature that killed off everybodies freedom. That monster was the teacher. Also, I can't remember the event at all. Whats worse is that I've often drew me killing various demonized people in brutal and overly vicscious ways. It gets worse once I began writing. At one point, I wrote the exact way I would kill someone, complete with explicit mutterings of what I would say and how I would look at them. Before that, I would often shout out various forms of torture, usually involving the other teams intestines, during PE games. Also, I've commented to myself how demoinc and sadistic I am, at one point laughing at the thought of a woman attempting to sing while having her entrails stuffed into her mouth by a demonic personification of a superhero. Also, I was introduced to manga and anime by my freind showing the series Higurashi: More specifically, the one with the little girl ramming her head into a knife. You know who and what I'm talking about. * When I was a baby my mom used to sing Look at the Coffin because it was the least disturbing song she knew, until she learned some actual lullabies. And there's the drawing monsters and designing Grimtoothstyle traps for {{RPG}}s (I had a reason, though, because I had created my own very basic RPG, but there's something wrong with it being a [[NightmareFuelColoringBook 10 year old's stick figure rendering]])... and that's not even mentioning the designing Mooks for games, which include a monster-thing with a furry body, empty angry eyes, and either 4 or 6 tentacles depending on the version. The eyes are either red or black. And there's a ton of Sonic-y badniks... never mind what Sazuki the Cat (from my original fiction) gets up to sometimes (being one of these)... and my thinking that lizards and bats are cute (well, they are! Just look at a bat's adorably huge ears!)... and the oddities of my standard playlist, which has everything from Nickelback to Utada Hikaru to Three Days Grace to Powerman 5000... * Hello. I'm one of 'em. I put people off because I talk to myself ([[TheWoobie No-one else to talk to, sadly]]). Also, I draw really weird {{hentai}}, since I can't draw hands or feet. it took me several years to teach myself how to draw faces, so they used to be TheBlank. * Me. The first story I made was about a ghost girl based in Casper. It started this way: "Once upon a time that she lived with her mother and her father, but one day, some wrongdoers came and separated that family. The father was killed overseas, the mother in the hiding place of the wrongdoers, the girl in the Manor and the dog in another continent (End)" I was eight, by the way. And the story gets worse. * This troper apparently, was labeled by another troper as one of these. The following conversation has happened several times. ** Friend: Neil Gaiman is pretty good although Neverwhere gave me the creeps. ** Me: I didn't find Neverwhere creepy... But Gaiman is good. Have you read the Sandman series? ** Friend: No, is it scary? ** Me: I'm a lousy indicator but if you are able to watch autopsies being conducted while eating breakfast, then no. * My Otaku GF who's New Years resolution was "Be less Violent".

* {{Annebeeche}}: When I was in second grade, we did a short prompt around Halloween saying what we would catch in our webs if we were spiders. I assume the teacher predicted innocent answers like pizza or pokemon cards, but I said something like "I would catch Hercules [the disney character] and eat his muscles for dinner." D: * This troper gets very, very turned on by bondage that started when she was little and watching Daphne get tied up on Scooby-Doo. So when her mom found out she had assembled her Barbie dolls in various positions of bondage with twist ties she was [[{{Understatement}} a little freaked out]]. Now this troper has learned to keep her bondage fetish a little more hidden. ** Holy shit I'm not the only one! :D ** That is... [[FetishFuel really hot]]. * This troper's best friend Garrett fits this trope to a T. He won't stop talking about the illuminati and witchcraft and stuff. * I realized I may have had moments of this when I was little. I started to really like drawing in first or second grade. In third grade I became obsessed with DannyPhantom, and this was before I even knew I was drawing fanart or thinking up fan fiction. One of my drawings was a DannyPhantom comic that had Danny make friends with a depressed teen and felt bad for him, so Danny gave him ghost powers. Then the kid commited suicide using his new ghost powers. Danny gets really depressed. Then the kid comes back from the ghost zone and Danny has to battle him. Danny gets really wrapped up in his guilt and depression. The end. I wrote it when I was nine! No one ever saw it. And then there was the drawing from first grade with a mountain on fire. But the most recent is my main story I've been writing. In it the main character gets tortured and his parents killed by the evil organization when he was eight. Apparently that is creepy for a thirtee-year-old to come up with. * This troper sometimes forget how different her thoughts are from others. She, uh, had fantasies, involving... things 6 year olds shouldn't think up. Ever. It got worse when she got older. Now she's on medication and finds gruesome death funnier than gruesome sex, which in this case is an improvement. * This troper got her 8th grade English teacher "concerned" when she turned in a story about a person getting slowly tortured and abused by a psychopath. At the time she had no idea why the story was fucked up. Now, it's common knowledge among her friends about her strange fixation on death, gore, and of the like; gotten to the point where her friend wrote in her yearbook: "Serial killer or not, love ya anyway!" * This troper tends to draw pictures of torturing a character. It's always the same character and it's always gruesome, and she does it over and over and over and over and over.... * This Troper and her friend love to sing, but we sound ''really, really creepy'' when we sing together. Particularly since we favor songs such as ''Passage'' by ViennaTeng. * This Troper's friend is this. She has a really creepy giggle, laughs at things when the rest of us are crying and screaming in fear, and shrugs most things off when the rest of us are spooked. It's worse when she talks in our sleep. ''She spoke in a computeresque voice and

threatened to "eliminate" our friend!'' * This tropette is the most moe, innocent little thing... laughing at herself being shocked at the gunshots at the end of a play which will not be named due to the spoilers involved, but her older sibling thought she was laughing at the fact that they died. However, she has known to be rather cheerful when Saints Row 2 gave her a minigun to play with. She would most definitely consider herself a Yandere. * This Troper is considered one by his high school friends. Funny thing is, most of the times I freak them out, I don't even know what caused that... * [[Tropers.MurillionBlue This Troper]] has managed to creep her friends out. Mainly with a kinda deep EvilLaugh, or a SlasherSmile where she runs her tongue over a pointed canine tooth. She does this fairly often. ForTheLulz. ** And this one time, she was on a tour of a funeral home. When the group reached the room with the coffins/caskets, this Troper suggested using one as a bed. Her friends were freaked out by the idea, and one of them kept eyeing her warily. ** She also used to draw stick-figure pictures, usually featuring a character called [[KillerRabbit Bunny]] murdering the stick figure. Much red pencil was used. It was a great form of stress relief, though. * This troper is mostly known by the nickname Ghost in college, cause i have the habit of desapering and appearing in one place withouth people noticing me, once i was on the living room, when one of my roomates passed by then whe she saw me she jumped, there several ocassions in which im behind someone quietly and then that person gets spooked the moment i start to talk. I might have been the cause of Paranoia fuel to my friends. * [[Tropers.{{Encrypted12345}} This Troper]] is planning a fan fiction that contains a father and daughter relationship where the daughter eats his limbs regularly for nourishment and the father regenerates them with ease and is so used to it that he instructs his daughter to "Eat the bones, Myrrh. They're high in calcium." This Troper envisioned the scene that was mentioned to be an unusual but sweet waking up scene. The classmates in Biology class that he showed it off to [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel how]][[{{Squick}} ever]]... ---Go back to Main/NightmareFuelStationAttendant. And stop with the pictures, they're creeping me out! ----

NightmareRetardant * This troper would be scared of movies like Red Eye, Batman Begins, etc, except that she has a major crush on Cillian Murphy. *swoon* * [[{{QQQQQ}} This troper]] would usually shudder upon seeing [[NoCountryForOldMen Anton Chigurh]] on screen commiting atrocities, had it not been for one comment that Anton was [[CharlieAndTheChocolateFactory ''Willy Wonka'']] on his vacation time.

* [[ManWithoutABody This troper]], as a kid, had a quite scary nightmare with the exact same plot as ''Robot Monster''. You'd think a movie with the same plot as one of your nightmares would be scary as hell, which may explain the troper's extreme reaction to ''Eraserhead''. You'd think. * [[{{Joelkazoo}} This Troper]] saw a community theater production of ''Jesus Christ: Superstar'', where in the scene where Judas [[spoiler: is supposed to hang himself]], the director got all artsy-fartsy and had [[spoiler: a bunch of ladies dressed like angels draping Judas with ribbons and handing him a noose before the stage went black]]. This is likely due to an incident in the UK where the actor accidentally was hung for real the year before. * [[{{Turtleducks}} This troper]] is a scaredy cat, and was expecting to shit herself when her friend played the third ''SilentHill'' game. Then those weird little monsters that are a head, a tail, and two legs appeared, making mooing noises. I began going "[=MURRRRRRder=]," just to mimic them. The really tall monster in the clothing store looks like he has a penis for a head and makes squishy noises when he walks. Also, when Heather walks up to a payphone that has been ripped off the wall and is surrounded by gore and says, "This phone doesn't appear to be working," it helps diffuse the creepy. * Many a time when [[{{Joysweeper}} this troper]] has been browsing HighOctaneNightmareFuel or similar and found herself getting uneasy perhaps imagining something watching from right behind her, now under her chair(hah! She is sitting on a wicker chest!), now from just inside her barely-open closet, now sloooooowly coming back and waiting for just the right moment - she imagines someone that she knows and loves walking in, hitting it, and sighing because they never learn. Hey, if she's going to imagine powerful fictional monsters, there might as well be equally(at least) powerful heroes around to stop them. It's worked since this troper was little and afraid of {{Goosebumps}} covers. ** When [[ARandomPerson this troper]] is haunted by some of those examples, he tells himself that since they are imaginary villains, he can fight them with imaginary heroes. Somehow, things are less threatening with [[FistOfTheNorthStar Kenshiro]] and [[MagicalGirlLyricalNanoha Nanoha]] protecting you. *** Absolutely. Whenever I'm scared by something that someone else has thought up (such as Series/DoctorWho monsters) I always have a little voice in my head go "Ha! That's nothing!" and promptly fling some of my own psycho villians at it. My logic is, even though they're evil they've got to do what I say and protect me, because if they don't I won't write them any more. ** Hell, ''everything's'' less threatening when you've got Kenshiro on your side. [[CatchPhrase They're Already Dead!]] ** Are you guys all me? ..Somehow? *** What about ghosts and zombies? *** This troper holds an imaginary AK-47 when he's scared of something imaginary. Of course, that might not work against [[ZombieApocalypse endless zombie hordes]], [[SlenderManMythos The Slender Man]], or [[YouCannotGraspTheTrueForm nameless horrors from the subconscious]], but [[MoreDakka still...]]

*** And when that doesn't work, he likes to follow one of the above tropers and deploy massive battalions from his own writing against it, and by the time he's finished thinking of how Dr. Alexander Hsieh might decide to fight [[FirstEncounterAssaultRecon Alma]] and her [[HarryPotter armies of Inferi]], he's forgotten what he's scared of. ** This troper protecters include [[DragonBallZ Goku]] and Captain America. Also her collection of [[CreepyDoll Asian Ball-Jointed Dolls]], because what better way to fight creepy than with more creepy? And if she ever faced a NightmareOnElmStreet Freddy Kruger YourMindMakesItReal situation, she'd summon a reality warping Joker to kick his ass, and a Batman to keep him in line. ** Funny enought, i always imagine that im a kickass vampire, with the power to manipulate shadow and among other cool vampire powers, everytime i think there some monster in the dark i imagine myself turning into its worst nightmare and kick his ass while laughting evily, it has something to do it in order to fight a monster you must become one. * [[{{Greymalkin}} This troper]] has successfully cured herself utterly of fear from several NightmareFuel pictures, most notably Captain Howdy from TheExorcist and Goya's ''Saturn Devours His Son'' by copying them into photoshop and giving them bling, party hats, beer goggles, speech bubbles regarding their grandmothers' birthdays, etc. ** Oh, you MUST still have those pictures somewhere...post them on photobucket or something, we wanna see! *** I second that notion. ** May I request a 'shop of the {{Eraserhead}} baby? That damned thing ''still'' creeps me out... * [[ShifterCat This troper]] and her housemate caught a scene of some horror film involving malevolent cats. Camera close-ups of cats staring, or hissing, intercut with shots of a bespectacled woman becoming increasingly panicked... and all we could say was, "Awww, kitties!" * What [[NolanBurke this troper]] found worst of all was the scene in ''The Ring 2'' where the heroine's car is violently attacked...by deer. Yeah, ''deer''. It's random, stupid, barely connected with the rest of the film, and ''there is no way to make deer scary''. ** [[http://www.flickr.com/photos/francesborg/2130798510/ Wrong!]] *** It's.. it's... SO CUTE! And evil! Cute little fangy deer thing! *** Yeah, that's not really striking fear into my heart either...sorry. *** It's so cute. I want to take it home. *** BAMBI! *** Cool! its a vampire deer! I want one! * For [[RayAyanami this troper]], watching {{DeceasedCrab}} play through ''{{Eversion}}'' did little to offset [[spoiler:how {{Nightmare Fuel}}-y the last few worlds and the endings were.]] However, [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_69urn7asVA Let's Play LaMulana 084]] successfully turned the [[spoiler:skimpy swimsuit]] scene into a CrowningMomentOfFunny. * [[AcrossTheStars This troper]] directed a one-act in which one of the leads (there's only two people in the show) had to fire a gun into the air. Since the Festival of One Acts is also a chance for the

actors to try their hand at teching, the sound team ''could not'' cue the gunshot effect with the actual gunshot. One day during tech week (the day before opening night, I believe) the gunshot sound didn't work at all. It was HighOctaneNightmareFuel. Luckily, during the performances, they got it right. ** The entire gun thing can be solved very easily: Don't use blanks or recorded gunshot sounds. My Drama teacher told us, along with a long story involving West Side Story, that he'd long ago decided to NEVER use blanks. Instead, get a 2x4, step on one end, lift up the other, and--when the gunshot is suposed to happen--let go. It sounds pretty well, and the only problem is if several gunshots in a row are needed. ** The 10th Anniversary recording of ''Les Miserables'' had a problem with a gun going off too early, as in during the "Castle on a Cloud" number too early! The little girl playing Cosette jumped and blinked, but kept right on singing. ** If only this troper knew the obvious 2x4 thing at the time. Three nights in a row an actor had to pull a gun out of his pocket and shoot it very quickly, and every single time the gunshot went off to soon or too late. The last night he pretended he had shot through his pocket. * I find it always helps to talk to the game or movie itself whenever something scary happens. It helps me keep my cool and stay calm. Usually this comes down to berating and teasing the game/movie. "Ooooh rattling lockers eh? Did you feel obliged to make that happen as soon as I came down this poorly-lit corridor Fear 2?" * A few years ago, this troper had a dream where he was being chased through a large house by [[OnePiece Arlong]]. Yes, a dream. It ceased to be a nightmare when, after I left him outside the house, he sent a squirrel inside to give me a message. ** [[http://www.ellie.projectcommand.com/images/monstersquirrel.JPG What if it was this one?]] ** Heh... then it would've been much different, I'm sure. As it was, it was the garden-variety squirrel that people tend to see everywhere in some areas. * This troper really isn't all that frightened or disturbed by the sight of the [[http://www.brendanturner.net/wpcontent/uploads/face_melt.jpg melting Nazi's face]] from RaidersOfTheLostArk. It looks like a pair of dentures shoved into a melting jelly donut. ** [[BreadEggsMilkSquick Oh, ew-ew-ew-ew]][[HighOctaneNightmareFuel ew-ew-ew-ew-ew-ew-ew-ew-ew,]] [[NoJustNo god, no!]] *** [[DeadpanSnarker Psssh. What a baby.]] * [[Main.MaiChansDailyLife Mai-Chan's Daily Life]] had this effect for this troper, the whole thing so over-the-top and narmtastic, that I could't help but to laugh. And that was way before the ... [[MemeticMutation famous scenes]]. * This Troper would have absolutely terrifying and recurrent nightmares of being chased or otherwise attacked by an invisible being. So, one night, he dreams of being in a corporate building. A box full of vials of blood is brought. But the vials suddenly burst, causing people and the building itself to get possessed. Potential for some scare right? Wrong! The voice of the evil that does the possessing resembles that of a woman trying to imitate a scary man and

failing spectacularly. It's "evil" involves things like stock taunts when I stumble and...yea thats pretty much it. Needless to say it was quite a funny dream. * [[GreatPikminFan This troper]], while watching videos on YumeNikki, will mostly play another video on another tab to keep away the nightmare fuel, such as one called "Ed Edd Eddy censored party". Oh, the white desert is cre- "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C291MHS2FFQ YEEEE HAW! GO BABY GO! WHEE-HE-HE-HOO! I'M A BUCKING BUCKARO!]]". * [[PentiumMMX2 This troper]] wound up doing this when he first tried watching {{Torchwood}}. Even when this werewolf-vampire thing came out and bit a person, as blood went everywhere, my only though was "[[MontyPythonAndTheHolyGrail It's just a flesh wound]]" * {{Lets Play}}s in general tend to soften the creepier scenes in games with the LPer's funny reactions. * The Something Awful forums have an automatic word censor that appears for non-members, turning swears into related silly words. Since this editor isn't registered, I find it considerably easier to sleep after reading {{The Slender Man Mythos}} when the victims's recounts of their encounters with the Slender Man involve them saying "gently caress" and "poo poo". ** Also in the original thread, someone pointed out that they were having a hard time being scared because they kept thinking of [[{{Family Guy}} Wacky Waving Inflatable Arms Flailing Tube Man]]. As someone else commented: "If he feeds on fear we have just found his kryptonite." ** This troper was absolutly terrified of the Slenderman, especially the suggested YourMindMakesItReal aspect, as she has a very active imagination. Then she saw [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xj6F_piB_HE Concrete Giraffes]], by LittleKuriboh. She is not scared anymore. *** (If the channel is down again, it can be found on the main Yu-GiOhTheAbridgedSeries site as well.) *** "Hey guys, can I be in your movie?" * [[JacobsLadder Jacob's Ladder]] just doesn't have the same effect if the first time you've seen it is on an iPod screen less than two inches wide.... * [[FirstEncounterAssaultRecon FEAR]] isn't nearly as tense when I play it while listening to [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v26eXtuatCE this song]]. Swedish pop to the rescue! * This troper finds {{Predator}}s ridiculously creepy, whether they're on our side or not. This troper stopped finding them creepy after watching a friend play Alien vs Predator (the 2010 one) during the Predator campaign. Not because he was playing as the predator, but because this troper read all of the subtitles in a ridiculously squeaky voice while ad-libbing lines about "fixing your faulty translator" and yelling at him to stop sucking, and now cannot watch any thing with them in without hearing that voice. ** "Stop sucking and kill them, Yoooounnnggbllluuuuddd!" * This troper when he was a year younger refused to watch the the rest of TheDarkKnight once he realized Two-Face was on the scene. Later, he took a look at him and burst out laughing and the sheer ridiculousness of his appearence. This troper is now kicking himself for not seeing

the rest of the movie, considering how [[SoCoolItsAwesome good it was.]] * This troper isn't into horror games, but he and the rest of his class were seriously, seriously frightened when our teacher, on the last day of school, decided to play ''[[NightmareFuel Hotel 626]]'' on the computer, linked into the proejctor. [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel Needless to say, that meant nightmares for the weekend]]. On the flip side, it acted as a major NightmareRetardant when another student plugged in his Wii with ''ResidentEvil''. ** "See, there's a big difference between when you're helpless, and when you have a gun." * For [[@/{{Psyga315}} This troper]], it's the walrus scene in {{Pingu}}. That's only because of TV Tropes saying it's Jamie's one winged angel form. * [[TweedlyDee I'll]] tell you what, I can't take any image of an anime character doing something intended to be scary or threatening seriously. Especially [[{{Bishonen}} "bishies"]]. The alleged "NightmareFace" on the Yugioh HighOctaneNightmareFuel page just made frown. There's just something about the [[GenericCuteness spiky hair, ski-jump noses and tear-drop shaped heads]] that nullifies any attempts to make anime characters scary. * An ice cream van with a very annoying jingle will play it at least once when passing this troper's house. Said jingle is very loud, very cheery, and has a habit of playing during inappropriate moments. Needless to say, the bad atmosphere is immediately dispelled as this troper and her family laugh at the incongruity. * in an online RP that this troper partakes in, one of the [=OCs=] is ARGO, an insane AI that, for most, is NightmareFuelUnleaded. He controls numerous frightening androids, has a voice ''very'' reminiscent of [[HarryPotter Lord Voldemort]], can't be seen at all, and people screaming in terror is music to his sound cards. For this troper and another [=RPer=](who happens to be the AI's creator), however, he's this trope. Why? Enter Tempest; another AI with almost the exact same capabilities and just so happens to have ARGO's termination sequence in her code. She can defeat him with surprising ease, either by activating the termination code or electrocuting him until he deactivates. and here's the thing:''he can't fight back''. the only thing he can ''try'' to do to her is zap her back, and she has the ability to send the shocks right back at him! Yeah, it's hard to be afraid of someone that's beaten so easily, and who keeps getting himself from the frying pan to the oven. * This Troper is working on a StylisticSuck Webcomic series, where a detective and his assistant Ben (yeah, [[BenDrowned that]] [[MajorasMask Ben]]) go and solve mysteries based on creepy pasta. So far the comic has done stories based on [[http://manty64.deviantart.com/art/SHERLOK-HOMLS-EPISOED-1179597926?q=gallery:Manty64/15002809&qo=5 Suicide Mouse]], [[http://manty64.deviantart.com/gallery/#/d2yxskd Slen]][[http://manty64.deviantart.com/gallery/#/d2yxvuu der]] [[http://manty64.deviantart.com/gallery/#/d2yyy63 Man]], and [[http://manty64.deviantart.com/art/SHERLOK-HOLMS-EPISOD-6179686274?q=gallery:Manty64/15002809&qo=0 the Wyoming Incident]]. He

hopes it works. ([[Webcomic/SherlokHolms Now has it's own page.]]) * For this troper, who knows he's probably alone on this, Scroop from TreasurePlanet. Michael Wincott does a good job voicing him and the first time we see him, when he crawls down the rigging towards Jim, is pretty unsettling, but when he stood or walked upright he just looked silly. The fact that the last fight with him comprised mostly of slapstick didn't help much either. It's almost like they were [[ExecutiveMeddling trying]] to downplay... [[MoralGuardian Wait, no... forget that last bit.]] * You know the Weeping Angels from Doctor Who? I find that a good way to get past their inherent scariness is to imagine [[AvatarTheLastAirbender Toph Bei Fong]] beating the crap out of them. Not just because it's funny, but because her powers would make her the Angel's worst nightmare. ** Or better yet, imagine kicking one in the groin, blinking and the seeing them real in pain * Looking at all these comments about [[LegendOfZeldaOcarinaOfTime Jabu-Jabu's belly]], I still didn't understand how a level that isn't so detailed despite being a WombLevel can be nauseating. * Like a lot of people who've played EpicMickey, this troper was quite freaked out by the Clock Tower boss, and she chose to destroy it with thinner. And while she's sure that the cutscene where it looks like it's having a seizure and bleeding everywhere as it falls apart was meant to freak the kids out the most, the mishmash of 'broken clock' sound effects as well as ''sped-up cuckoo clock noises'' it was making sort of [[{{Narm}} ruined that effect]] for this troper and just made it more hilarious than disturbing. * {{Tropers/Leycira}} got some NightmareRetardant for [[UncannyValley sm]][[HighOctaneNightmareFuel ile]][[SlasherSmile .dog]] on DeviantArt. [[NightmareFetishist Now she kinda wants one as a pet.]] Would make a good watchdog. * I had a ''double subversion''. I read the HighOctaneNightmareFuel page for FirstEncounterAssaultRecon, thought it was okay...until I started walking around in the dark and imagining Alma jumping out from doors and sneaking up behind me. ''This was just from reading the HONF page'', without ever playing the game or indeed even seeing any gameplay. Then I had a dream about Alma...in which she was a slightly cute {{Tsundere}} whose biggest frightening aspect was that she kept reminding me that she [[ThisIsSPARTA COULD! KILL! ME! AT ANY SECOND!]] Bye-bye, Alma fears. * [[@/LostLenore I]] was playing TheLegendOfZeldaTwilightPrincess, watched by my seven-year-old sister. She had reached the cutscene pertaining to [[spoiler: the Mirror of Twilight]], and at one point in it, [[spoiler: Ganon]] is seen riding a demonic horse with flaming eyes. This didn't really freak her out all that much, but any drama in that moment was stripped by the seven-year-old calling it a "bad horse", [[DrHorriblesSingALongBlog which has a very different connotation in her mind.]] * [[http://i.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/article/6/2/5/36625.jpg?v=1 This picture]] from [[http://www.cracked.com/article_18871_12-things-youllwish-youd-never-seen-under-microscope_p2.html this article]] made a couple friends use profanity. I was giggling my head off.

[[NightmareFuel The others, on the other hand]]... * I just read the Comic Horror and Eschatology page, for HighOctaneNightmareFuel. So, at first, I was as scared as the other tropers by all the things described there : how much we're insignificant, how freaking big the universe is, how mind boggling it is... And then, I remembered I freaking loved TengenToppaGurrenLagann and Warhammer40000. What's the point ? Well, I started to think with a combination of the way humans acts in those settings. So, we're ridiculous specks compared to the rest of universe... Mere drops of water in an ocean... Yeah, that's bad. But you know what ? I don't give a ''damn''. Once, we were nothing but animals, screaming apes only caring about finding food for living another day. But one day, we stood up. We looked at the position nature wanted us to stay, and we collectively thought "well, ''fuck it''". So, we evolved. We became sentient. We studied the world around us, and with this knowledge we managed not only to dominate the other creatures of this planet, but also to become unique beings who create, who invent, who master the very elements themselves. Some think that we're doomed to stay on this planet, that our technology will never allow us to reach the stars. I laugh at this thought. Compared to this world, we're extremely young, and yet in a blink (on an astronomical scale) we managed to master the atom and to build a technology that allowed us to step on our moon. As long as we never forget our desire to evolve, what allowed us to become the sophisticated species we are now today, we will find a way. And then, the real fight will begin. So we're just dusts ? Fine. Then let's just drown the stars themselves with this dust. Let's explore the universe so that there won't be a single celestial body that won't have been marked - if not ''enslaved'' - by us. Let's prove to the stars that we are no longer apes - That we are MEN, and that we have the power within ourselves to conquer ALL. If we are alone in the universe, then nothing is stopping us from claiming it as our own. If we ever feel lonely, then we'll create life itself - I'm not talking about reproduction, but of making other planets fit for life and to make it develop, and even push it for allowing sentient beings to emerge. If we are not alone, then let's collaborate with those others so that we'd both continue on our evolution and, who knows ? [[AscendToAHigherPlaneOfExistence Transcend our condition.]] But if they ever prove themselves to be hostile, then let them FEAR the wrath of Mankind. That power is within us, and we're the only ones who can decide when to stop. We will explore. We will discover. We will ''conquer''. [[ThisIsSPARTA WE. WILL. RULE.]] * [[TokenFembot This Troper]] has a horrible history with the horror genre, to the point where even amusing [[LetsPlay LPs]] sometimes cause nightmares. Then one night she had a dream where she was being chased by the Scissorman from [[ClockTower Clock Tower]]... until [[TransformersGeneration1 Optimus Prime]] stepped on him. They then had a tea party, except the Scissorman wouldn't stop bleeding all over the nice table, so he got thrown off the Golden Gate Bridge. Now, most horror [[LetsPlay LPs]] have become watchable, because if anything becomes a bit scary... BAM. OPTIMUS PRIME STEPPING ON THE OFFENDING MONSTER. * [[StongRadd It's this Troper's superpower.]]

* This troper finds ''LegendOfZeldaMajorasMask'' frightening as all hell, especially the villain itself. But the horror of it turned to an odd sense of amusement when it turned into it's second form, Majora's Incarnation, mainly due to the fact that the villain was moonwalking while making funny noises. It was hard to keep a straight face when a villain planning to destroy the whole world starts imitating MichaelJackson for no reason. * This troper cannot read Stephen King's works at all - not because they're too scary, but because the gigantic amount of swearing going on ruins the entire atmosphere for me. * This troper recently had a dream that would have been pretty scary if it weren't for this one creature. It looked like a relatively giant leech with the mouth of a headcrab on its face, and acted like a headcrab. Now, just to make it clear to those of you that don't know, "acting like a headcrab" means leaping at and latching onto people's heads and controlling them while slowly eating them. The Nightmare Retardant kicked in when I heard its cry. It was... [[{{Understatement}} unexp]][[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0cVlTeIATBs ected]]. * It's hard for me to show fear against [[ResidentEvil4 Lord Saddler]] when I found out he was voiced by a certain [[WinnieThePooh gopher]]. * This troper normally scares easy (he literally can't watch Flubber because he can't stand seeing anything living being eaten on screen), yet he can read some pretty horrifying stuff (the key word is READ) without batting an eyelid. Why? The written word has little power over him unless the emotion is particularly strong. Examples which he does find chilling are the descriptions of the film "The Human Centiped", examples which he does not find chilling include large amounts of H P Lovecraft (who is otherwise a pretty good writer), Stephen King and lyrics for songs (until he hears them, that is). Sadly, this leaves him open to lots of FridgeHorror. * This torper used to be scared of the slenderman, well until he heard the Slenderman wants 20 dollars joke , and i heard the theme song [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-rwyCtbV5o]] , now everytime im alone and think that the slenderman is behind me i put on this song and picture the slenderman doing breakdance * The video of the screaming episode of Candle Cove would be creepy except that the red muppet with the Christmas tree is so funny in the way it contrasts with everything else, and the fact that it [[BigLippedAlligatorMoment does not fit at all with the rest of the video]] makes it so funny that it's impossible to be scared. * I honestly thought the North American boss theme from ''SonicCD'' was funny. Yes, nowadays I can see why people find it creepy, but I never took it seriously because at one point, it sounds like Eggman is belching loudly. * This troper is normally a ''very'' severe pyrophobe, but [[Codename:KidsNextDoor Father]]'s ability to burst into flame doesn't scare her much anymore. Why? In one episode in the arctic base, he got drenched in water every time he turned his flame on due to the ice above him melting. ---Go back to Main/NightmareRetardant if you want to be not at all scared

some more. <<|TroperTales|>>

NightmareSequence Anyone had any really bad dreams they'd like to share? * This one was very much {{High Octane Nightmare Fuel}}. Basically, I had been up for a while watching {{Marble Hornets}}, and told myself that if anything happened, I'd scream. Well now I had a dream where the Slenderman was coming down what looked like [[OhCrap my closet]]. The worst part was that my dream [[AndIMustScream wouldn't let me scream]]. Very, very scary. * This troper was SIX years old, and I had a dream where everyone I knew and cared for was GONE. Just... gone. All gone forever, no takebacks. I ran into my grannys house to find all of the doors off their hinges and rotting wallpaper. Even worse by the fact that he was crying in both the dream and ''real life''. * I'm... still not too happy at discussing the details, but any dream that involves my mother trying to bite the top of my head off with distended jaws, right after I wake up (in dream) from some kind of bizarre, scary {{Lotus Eater Machine}} can be pretty safely classified as {{High Octane Nightmare Fuel}}. I was shaken the entire day. * Talking Cheeseburger. 'Nuff said. ** NoodleIncident much? ** Wait. You were a character in ''Literature/{{Twilight}}''? * Let's see, I've been eaten by [[SesameStreet Grover]], been chased by a Godzilla-sized mix of Mr. Munch from Chuck E. Cheese's and Barney the dinosaur, had a stampede of blurry SesameStreet characters run through the room and jump out the window, been forced to watch a creepy-ass Muppet movie that changes depending on eyedrops that you put in your eye in which a Muppet and a small, bare tree ate each other over and over on a [=UFO=], even when they became ghosts after dying inside each other... Seeing a pattern here? Fortunately, these are all HilariousInHindsight to me, and I can imagine some of you chuckled a little, and for good reason. I love the Muppets and other puppet-related things nowadays. Perhaps it's the fact that my ridiculous phobias were keeping me away from something that's actually pretty funny and/or awesome. ** Mine used to be somewhat similar, but one involved Kermit the Frog coming to life out of a tote bag and proclaiming Happy Birthday, after which he said he had eaten my parents, and another involved trying to escape from that freaky-ass salesman from Pee Wee's Playhouse. My dreams still don't make much sense, like a recent one where a bus crashed into the upper floor of my school and fell apart like a milk carton. I don't know why I thought that was scary. * I had this really vivid big brother is watching type dream a while ago, where I was being chased everywhere by some sort of monster they were sending after me. The last line before I woke up was someone telling me that they would stop at nothing to kill me. The kicker? My

mom was the one who woke me up and she had the oh-so wonderful word choice of, "It's a big, bad world out there." * [[Tropers/RedWren This troper]] has the default form of knowing everything for a dream, even if solely on intuition. Her nightmares tend to be ones that can be summarized as, ''"No, you didn't."'' It was rather...distressing to be in a perfectly healthy relationship with a [[FriendlyNeighborhoodVampire vam]][[LesbianVampire pire]], staying over at her house, then suddenly: AH! You're turning me when I'm too young to successfully hold up TheMasquerade on my own ''just so you can have me bound to you for eternity''. And the transformation itself was terrified paralysis. And I had no idea when or ''if'' it was going to stop. * Although a bit odd, this particular nightmare has haunted me for YEARS. I'm sitting in the basement playing videogames, suddenly, the lights go out and I realize I should get out before something bad happens. Well, I see a ghost, freak out, but realize he's a good ghost. He cryptically tells me my family is in danger and offers to transfer us to another dimension. Upon arrival, I discover that my sister was trapped in the dimensional warp, which is pretty much like Stephen King's "the Jaunt" only it lasts forever. During my freakout, I step on a cute, tiny tiger thing, only to realize it's the most vicious animal in this particular dimension. I run screaming but trip and the tiger thing lands on me and begins ripping the back of my torso apart. I then realize that I'm feeling no pain and ask the ghost "I-Is this my dream?" the ghost replies, ominously "No... it's your mother's dream" I woke up screaming and clearly mind-raped by this dream. * When I was a teenager I had what I can only guess was a brisk stroll through Hell. I was running around the track in P.E. class. I got tired so I slowed to a cooldown pace. I noticed some middle schoolers sitting at a caf table drinking beer. They looked drunk and quite miserable. I then saw a door, so I started to go inside when a school employee stopped me. He explained that I could not go inside yet. Suddenly, out of nowhere, he sang in a weird airy voice what sounded like "shezebel, shezebel." Then he grabbed my forehead and barked in a deep demonic voice, '''"YOU'RE FALLING ASLEEP!"''' Yeah, sorry to disappoint you, Mister Hell Teacher, but that won't be happening for a while now. * I often close my eyes in bed only to get a fast-forward version of stuff like NightmareFaces zooming in quickly towards me or rotting faces and things like that. The weird thing is that I often don't get scared from it, but keep my eyes closed until I fall asleep... and sometimes, the real nightmares (zoom-ins don't count as I'm fully awake then) come, and there I either am killing my friends, they admit hating me after I've confronted them, or both (the latter first in that case, with BerserkerTears all the time)... [[NightmareFuelStationAttendant maybe I should see a doctor or something.]] If only I wasn't afraid of therapists... * That one where you're running but can't get anywhere, and then there's that one where you're walking around your empty house and you just know something scary is going to jump out at you. Yeah. Sweet dreams.

** Worse than that: having a nightmare, waking up in a similar nightmare, waking up in a similar nightmare to that, etc. This troper had that once. Not fun. *** [[BTIsaac This Troper]] Often had similar dreams, usually during the day. He realized halfway that he just woke up into another dream and at one point when meeting he said the following: "Guys, I have a little problem. [[GenreSavvy I can't wake up. Could you help me]]?" *** I had a similar one. Had to "wake up" and drag myself out of bed and out of the room before the light eating monsters get me, reach the door only to realise the exertion had been too much for me and I'd fallen asleep before getting out of bed. Five or six times in a row. **** Don't forget the one where you're walking down a sidewalk and you trip and fall. And fall. And fall. Then, just as you hit the ground, you wake up, jumping a foot out of bed. **** [[{{Allua}} This troper]] can attest to having chronic distorted and freakish dreams. [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel These include; shattering fetuses, disembodied skeletal limb, loved ones crying out in agony as lovecraftian EldritchAbomination slowly disembowls them and skins them alive]], and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking puppies]]. Okay, that last one was a lie. * Phobias can generate some pretty frightening dreams. The problem is, the more deathly afraid of object X you are, the more concerned you become about it showing up in real life, and the more likely it is to appear in an even more horrifying form in a dream. * Any dream featuring death or dead things. I once had a dream, when I was about 12, that my then-best friend and I found a woman's dead body in a garbage bag. I still vividly remember the corpse-- her skin was very, very white, and her eyes were bulging out of her head. The worst part is that I dreamed that we'd found it in the yard outside of the church that she and I were actually attending at the time. * I don't usually dream, but after watching Dawn of the Dead and playing Nazi Zombies with a friend until the small hours of the morning, I experienced a distressing version on the Tetris Effect. I'm backed up in a corner with a single a clip left for my BAR and a useless pistol, having to put my friend's entire family out of their misery before he and they started to disembowel me too, even the children. Throwing grenades to make up for my diminishing ammo, one bounces off a pillar near me and it lands near my feet. I dive away but it blows my legs off to the knee. I still manage to prop myself up against the wall as a dozen runners come through the door and windows. When I ran out of ammo for my BAR they manage to tear off my right hand, the one holding my suicide grenade, so when it goes off I just lost my arm and the use of my left hand, meaning I couldn't use my pistol to blow my brains out as they kept on coming. At least I woke up when they started tearing into my spleen. It wasn't the pain of the tearing-apart that was most disconcerting, it was the feeling of whole chunks of flesh being torn out, leaving an unnatural nothing. But that's dreams for you. Vivid. * Right - if you've seen TERMINATOR 2, you may remember the dream sequence where Linda Hamilton is forced to helplessly watch as Los Angeles is nuked, then watch as a bunch of children get burnt in a fireball, and then she gets immolated herself. This troper had been

having that EXACT SAME DREAM as a recurring nightmare, for a full TWO YEARS before the film came out. The first time she tried to watch T2 in theaters, that scene prompted this troper's one and only panic attack and she had to leave the room and sit in the lobby for a good 20 minutes to calm down. * Dreams where you feel pain, and you know it's a dream, made much worse by the fact that your brain often resists you waking up, and the kind of pain is usually quite slow and being inflicted deliberately not neccessarily by something human either. *shudders* * Anyone else ever have dreams where they themselves are the scary ones? This troper does. I have an astounding amount of dreams where I kill people, and at least one where I ''raped'' someone (someone I KNOW, even!!) I usually fight with someone (anyone... sometimes cartoon characters. They're not ''always'' innocent, though) and attempt to rip open their head with my bare hands, or step on their face and stomp on them. I am ''not'' this kind of person in real life, I try to be kind to everyone and am a pacifist, but it just creeps me out when I have dreams like this. It's much rarer that I have a standard "nightmare" in which I am the one being threatened. * this troper once had a series of [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin firenightmares]] shortly after an incident with an overheating furnace. She had so many that she wound up recording them in a journal for her therapist. Since then, flames have been this troper's exclusive NightmareFuel * [[{{Tropers/Freiberg}} This Troper]] had a dream in which he gained superpowers, albeit fairly weak ones. All went well after that until Magneto started trying to kill him and this troper lost his powers and had to run. At one tense moment, he got scared enough that he woke up from the dream...and then could not stop thinking about the dream, falling right back asleep and entering it again right where he had left off. Ughhh. * This Troper had a bizarre nightmare last night. Started with a cow in my grandma's garden (a beloved pet, apparently) dying. My grandma then got depressed so my dad and I escaped to Canterbury, where we were driving along a cliff edge getting soaked by waves. We then arrived at a kind of warehouse, where a guy was chopping up metal. He accidentally stabbed himself, and in something that was fast becoming a {{Disney Acid Sequence}}, [[BodyHorror split in half]] among blobs of distorting primary colours. And then we get to the real {{Mind Screw}}... * This troper recently had a dream with images of severed pig heads and people standing in a line to be pushed into a pool of acid. Then a troll-thing started chasing me and got hit by a train, but when it was hit it turned into a beam of light; that's when the dream turned into a 'can't tell apart reality from unreality' nightmare. * When I was younger, I used to have some ''messed up'' dreams due to my crazy little imagination. My family turning into skeletons and diving off boards into an empty pool with open coffins at the end. A giant hammer, shingle, then ''gun'' each trying to kill little, bugsized me. Running in a white walled maze-house with a murderer prowling around. Many, many more. Luckily that's stopped, but I remember praying each night that I wouldn't have dreams with corpses,

vampires, guns, blood, killing, dying, monsters, ghosts, falling, remotely scary faces, '''ECT''' and being afraid to fall asleep. * I have a recurring nightmare about being in a perfect position for catharsis but every single act of brutality I attempt upon the diserving target does nothing and is usually laughed off. This is probably very telling of my lack of self confidence and constant self depreciation. Recently one dream subverted this trend and it was as satisfying as all hell. Then there's a dream where my usual blemishes become a ravening case of mucocutaneous leishmaniasis mixed with what can only be described as simultaneous growth and necrosis of cancerous tissue, essentially my face rotting into black effluent in seconds. Usually whilest I scream. The rest of my dreams are just a mix of twin peaks, dork tower and lucky star (in style of content rather than actual references.) * It wasn't so much scary as I had never been as shaken from a dream as I had this one time. I was working at a food court at the time and in the dream I was working as a waiter in a food court with a big giant ceiling, I had just seated two old ladies probably in or nearing their seventies, they told me they would be ordering for them and their husbands. It was around this time that i thought to myself "wait, I've had this dream before, don't be scared by the shock/plane crash." or something like that, anyways I'm now back in the dream and they are paying for their order ahead of time, it's some complicated ordeal where they only have cash and we're trying to figure out a good way to pay for it. I like helping old people with that, anyways I take the money and turn to bring it back by the cash register when suddenly the lights go out, all that I see is the moonlight shining on the entire scene, suddenly the grounds starts shaking, and something big and metallic crashes into the place and basically obliterates everything from where I just was on. I'm hunched down in a nook behind some concrete stairs and everything is quiet, because the massive crash happened so fast that nobody started screaming yet. looking back i realize that nobody was screaming because nobody was there, but as i got up from my hiding spot the only thing that i could think of was "don't scream, if you scream everyone else will scream and this situation doesn't need that, don't scream." i have never wanted to scream in terror and shock in my life that bad. and the worse part is that feeling that i had just been through a disaster stuck with me for the better part of the day. * When I first played SilentHill3, I played it about a year after it came out, and I was about 14 years old. I hadn't played any of the other games from the series before, and I was completely unprepared for just how frightening the game was. The reason I mention this is because the dream you are about to read about was pretty much caused by one sequence in particular from the game. The dream starts out with me in a state of total darkness; nothing around me is visible, yet my body is for some reason visible, as if there was a spotlight shining on me. This made me feel extremely vulnerable, and I suddenly felt that I was in danger, and that ''something'' was looking for me, and wanted to kill me. I ran forward, never coming across anything, or even hearing anything, yet there was this feeling I could not shake that [[ParanoiaFuel I was being hunted]]. Then suddenly, without me

ever seeing it coming nearer, I am standing in front of a stairway, leading downwards into obscurity, the staircase illuminated in a comforting, soft blue light. I felt that if I went down the stairway, I would be safe. I ran downwards, noting that the farther down I went, the less illuminating the light the stairway was bathed in became, until, again, without me seeming to notice before it was too late, the light was gone completely, and the staircase had ended. I suddenly realized that what I had perceived to be my way out of this place was in fact [[OhCrap a trap]]. I then heard this ''[[HellIsThatNoise utterly horrible noise]]'' that for some reason I knew was whatever was looking for. It sounded sort of like a combination of a snake hissing, metal scraping sounds, and an artificial breathing apparatus. I then felt around my legs a sort of warm, slimy feeling, and knew I ''needed to get the fuck out of there now''. I turn around to go back up the stairway, but it was gone. In its place was a steel ladder, illuminated by a single blood red spotlight, and leading seemingly upwards into infinity. As I looked at it, I saw that the ladder was covered in barbed wire, and had nails sticking upwards from each step. I knew this was my only way out of here, so I went forward anyway. As I got closer, I saw that the whole thing was covered in blood, and had small pieces of flesh and skin stuck to it in places. The dream always ends with me gritting my teeth, and placing one foot on the ladder, and watching the nails and wire shoot out of the top of the flesh of my foot. Oh, wait, did I say ''always''? Oh, that's right, I forgot to mention: this was a recurring dream. I had it every night for three months. Is it any wonder that I stopped playing SilentHill3 until I was nearly 20? * This troper had nightmares more often than dreams when she was little. Subjects ranged from there being a homicidal dragon-thing living under the playset (which, of course, got her and tried to eat her, which was terrifying), to being carried around in the mouth of an alligator unable to call for help in her own home, to a shitton of falling dreams (seeing as this troper is terrified of falling to her death). Her high school is also rather... prolific in that every year it has some sort of disaster (arson, an almost gun-riot but the kid was caught, many fights, general stupidity), so when she entered freshman year she had several nightmares along the lines of her friends getting shot. To ruin the serious streak, there was also one about a ferret. It wasn't even an evil ferret, just a normal ferret that evidently didn't like her. * This troper had a strange nightmare when she was little and it's actually been a recurring dream. She dreamt that she was in a maze that had both ends closed off once she was inside it and they would only open if she were close to one of them. Vines would come out of the walls of the maze and grab at her legs and she'd always hear the buzz of..well, something. It was probably a chainsaw or a swarm of angry bees because she'd navigate through the maze by avoiding the buzzing. [[HellIsThatNoise She never really did know what that buzzing sound was...]] * I have nightmares where I'm in the [[DeadSpace USG Ishumura]] with Isaac Clarke. What usally happens at the end is that I open up a door and a Hunter or something grabs me and kills me in the most painful

and brutal way you can imagine. For example a hunter grabs me, starts tearing out my insides, I'm still barley alive, when it cuts off my legs, arms, and slitting my throat before splitting me in half and decapitating me. And Cue Isaac Clarke looking on and killing my attacker and going on with what he is supposed to do. I usally feel at least a little pain when I'm getting killed. And then there's some recent nightmare things I've have ever since watching the Eye-poke machine part in [[DeadSpace2 Dead Space 2]] of me burning my eye or someone stabbing my eye, or someone shooting my eye. Yep, my mind is one messed up place. * This tropette, when she was six she had this dream where she was watching TV in the living room and this ghost with a plastered on smiley face emoticon came down the hallway into the living room and started chasing her. I couldn't wake up. It took me ten attempts at waking up before i woke up. ** I also had a dream where my mom and four year old brother were hurt and they were shrunken down to the size where an ambulance could get them to a hospital via the phone jack. WTF? Scared the hell out of me too. * This troper had a rather short one that horrified her more than any other nightmare she's had. She was watching a movie in her living room with her parents and it was the movie that was scary. The movie was set in a prison, and one of the prisoners was standing in front of a mirror making loud screeching/roaring noises. It had no lips or eyes, just bloody holes where those things should normally be. It was partially greenish-gray, almost zombie-like, and it had frost covering parts of its arms and torso. It had no hands. Somehow, on the other side of the mirror it was like a glass door/window and another prisoner smashed the door/window/mirror. The green one walked through it and became a normal person with lips and eyes, but it was still rather green and frosty. Absolutely terrifying for me. * When this troper was a little kid, she had recurring dreams of being sat on by monsters. You may laugh, but for an undersized four yearold, that shit is ''terrifying''. ** She also recalls another dream where she was looking at a giant, monstrous turtle-like head with glowing red eyes and the sort of aura that proclaims "MMM DELICIOUS 7 YEAR-OLD NOM NOM NOM". She tried closing her eyes, but even if she did, it was STILL THERE. * I had a dream where I logged into {{Runescape}} and the [[http://runescape.wikia.com/wiki/Falador_Massacre Falador Massacre]] was happening. Needless to say, I logged out, '''fast'''. * This troper once had a nightmare in which his best friend was making out with the [[FatBastard local fat guy]].It was so horrifying that this troper literally woke up in a cold sweat, at 4am, and called my previously mentioned friend to make sure it was just a dream. * In this dream, this troper was standing in a plaza with a crowd of people, and there was a man on a balcony overlooking it as if about to give a speech, then everyone started melting into orange goo like ''TheEndOfEvangelion''. * This troper once had a very scary {{dream within a dream}} while she was, according to her friends, drifting in and out of pain-induced delirium (she'd fallen and hurt herself pretty badly while they were

hiking, and there was [[CanYouHearMeNow no cell phone reception for several miles]], so they were carrying her to get help). From what she remembers of it, it involved several songs, the characters from {{Pokemon}}, and the creepy girl who lives in her head. ---No... can't sleep... I'll have one of those {{Nightmare Dreams}} again!

NinjaEditor * This troper was once a moderator at a forum and some people were being ''utter douchebags'' to a few members and kept editing their posts so we couldn't see anything. Unfortunately, one of their banned messages was, "Joke's on you - we had screencaps!" * [[Tropers/PuppyLuver This troper]] was informed by a friend, with whom it was an inside joke that said troper would point out the friend's typos, that she had a typo in her deviantART journal. "What typo?" troper says. Said troper had edited the typo in the journal while leaving the "minor edit" selection checked. * One member of my forum's first sign of being a stalker troll weirdo was how he used to edit his posts to say that he had removed it instead of deleted it, even if it was something perfectly innocent-he did this for most of his posts. In less innocent posts, whenever me or one of the mods edited something out of his post, he would go back and add something worse, then we would have to go back and edit it out and then lock the post. * On a forum I was on, some members used to post something innocent, then a few minutes later add an insult, or post something rude to another member, then edit it out once they read it. This got it past the mods, even if its quoted, because the same members also enjoy quoting posts in their post and then editing it to change what the members say. * [[{{Tropers/Joerc45}} This troper]] tends to do this, mostly because he wants to make sure that his posts are free of grammatical and spelling errors. As he wishes to be very polite and well-mannered and not offend anyone, he revises anything that may sound impolite or rude to anyone reading his posts. :) ** If not for the link to a troper page and the references to oneself being a male, I'd think I wrote this and forgot about it. I'm a bit compulsive about editing my posts for clarity and politeness. * [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=71fmkpxz9dtilc73y604 a8r9&page=318#7931 This page]]. ---Go back to NinjaEditor. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NinjaPirateZombieRobot

* [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/profile.php This Troper]] is writing an urban fantasy story about a PsychoForHire part-ork Black-Russian Canadian-Japanese-and-Navajo in there somewhere [[OurWerewolvesAreDifferent werewolf]] with SpaceMarine training and implants who's married to a sidhe. * This troper and her friend (another [[MostTropersAreYoungNerds troper]], actually) once got ''so'' bored during study hall in high school that we created a [[HollywoodScribbling crude drawing]] of a [[ThoseWackyNazis Nazi]]-[[RedScare Communist]]-[[ReligionOfEvil Satanist]]-[[{{Wicca}} Wiccan]] [[WhenTreesAttack tree]] with [[InstantAwesomeJustAddNinja shuriken]], a [[{{BFS}} huge]] [[FlamingSword flaming]] [[EveryThingsBetterWithSamurai samurai]] [[CoolSword sword]], [[{{Yu-Gi-Oh}} enchanted children's playing cards]], [[EyeBeams eyes that can shoot laser beams]], a [[EvilEye third eye]] complete with [[PsychicPowers mind powers]], [[BreathWeapon fire breath]], [[SailorMoon Sailor Moon]] powers, [[BattleAura an aura of power]], and [[ArsonMurderandJaywalking a bowl of]] [[CerealInducedSuperPowers cereal]]. Believe it or not, there were probably [[TropeOverdosed various other]] [[WhatDoYouMeanItWasnTMadeOnDrugs whimsical]] and/or [[WhatDoYouMeanItsNotAwesome awesome]] things in our drawing that I can't recall at the moment. However, I do remember that our study hall teacher gave us weird looks and told us that we really needed something to do when he noticed our little creation. ** During a different occasion of boredom in study hall, this same troper and her same troper friend created another NinjaPirateZombieRobot crude drawing, though it was significantly more simple than the one mentioned in the previous entry. It was a picture of a [[EverythingsWorseWithBears grizzly bear]] [[WarOnTerror terrorist]]. Why yes, we are quite the {{Cloud Cuckoo Lander}}s. How can you tell? * A story this troper wrote contained the line. "Don't worry, she's a doctor. Well, yes, a psychic ghost astronaut doctor." (Who had been trained in hand-to-hand combat by a cosmonaut with energy powers who was was also a ghost.) ** This troper's friend: "Imagine if Burt Rutan was posessed by the ghost of Wernher von Braun and then he built a hypersonic digital laser flyswatter." Yes, he probably had drunk more coffee than was healthy at that point. * This troper once came up with a chainsaw, with a chainsaw nailed through it, whose teeth were made of chainsaws attached to chains. The chainsaw flails used nails as teeth. * This troper was once DMing a game of Dungeons and Dragons that included Frost Giants riding Tyrannosauruses made of pure Elemental Ice. It made for great mooks for the white dragon in the ice level where the heroes had to save Santa. * When this troper plays a Vampire-based deck in MagicTheGathering, she especially likes using [[http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?multiverseid=201 800 Rise From The Grave]] on vampires. So effectively, it is possible to have a ''zombie vampire'' on the battlefield at a point in the game. Why yes, it is rather hilariously awesome.

* This troper came up with a vampiric ninja warrior back when he was a teenager. His best friend was a werewolf, and his other friends included a descendent of the Van Helsing clan who he was in love with, and a badass guitar rocker based on Ted Nugent. He fought Dracula and his demonic consort Lilith, and also had a grudge against a commandostyle team of vampire hunters who were very Knight Templar-ish about their business and who killed his lover and sire in a quite vicious way. If I ever revisit this guy, he's getting a complete makeover and a serious reimagining as far as world and antagonists are concerned. I might keep the commando-style vampire hunters though. * This troper and his father figured out that the only thing worse than a Zombie, ninja, robot, pirate squirrel, is a Zombie, ninja, robot, pirate, squirrel, with AIDS! Lets just say his whole family has a knack for this. * This troper just bought a lovely pink dress covered in ''zombie unicorns''. That thing is ''so'' getting worn at graduation. * This Troper's very imaginative friend says he is an alien ghost vampire zombie. I would actually believe that, hes so crazy and hyper, I do think he is from another planet. * This troper is in a roleplay where there are two of these: one is a Japanese-Italian girl from [[{{Pokemon}} Kanto]] with a Southern accent in Sinnoh, and the other is a Pessimistic Researcher Pokmon Trainer [[EverythingsDeaderWithZombies Zombie]] Starfish Human Samurai {{Ninja}} Superhero who [[GenderBender Turns into a Girl]]. Yep. ** So, the GenderBender {{Ninja}} version of [[PonyoOnACliffByTheSea Ponyo]]? *** If Ponyo were a Pokmon Trainer/Researcher, sure. * This Troper was given the task of writing an analytical essay on a subject of his choice. Three hours later a report on the FlyingRainbow-Unicorn-Pegasus was finished and handed in. * [[{{Odd1}} 0dd1]]: I have a friend who is obsessive about ninjas, pirates (to a lesser extent), and HarryPotter. Bored in class with the majority of the class absent and a substiture teacher (and what amounted to no work to do at all), I decided to write a song for her because...well, it's not like I had anything better to do. It's about a flying ninja (who wants my food) battling a pirate named after a [[TheBeatles Beatles]] song, her army of robot ninjas, and her right hand man who just happens to be the keyboardist of [[TheZombies a popular 60s rock group]]. [[spoiler: The song ends the only way a song like it could: The singer concludes that baked goods laced with drugs are a hella powerful stuff.]] * This Troper has a roleplay character who is an undead [[AncientEgypt Egyptian]] priest who upholds justice by deceiving criminals with his [[MasterOfIllusion manipulation of vision]], which is typically followed by [[HeroicSociopath slaughter]]. He can also fly and create force fields. * [[Tropers/TheTallOne I]] recently had a conversation that ended with "[[SuperPoweredRobotMeterMaids Robot]] [[InstantAwesomeJustAddNinja ninja]] [[EverythingsBetterWithMonkeys monkey]] maids. [[SeenItAll What next?]]" * This troper just finished eating a plateful of Gluten Free Chocolate Muffin-Waffles.... They were delicious.

* As of a recent DungeonsAndDragons session, [[{{Tropers/lunarkweh}} this troper]] is now playing a wraith haunting its old [[MechanicalLifeforms warforged]] body. Who just so happens to be head of security on a privateering vessel. Now it just needs to take a level of Ninja and we'll be set... * Thanks to this trope, [[{{Tropers/ThePostalGamer}} this troper]] made a Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot character in Chaos Faction 2. Ninja bandana, pirate beard, zombie eyes and robot feet, topped off with the final boss' body, Super Saiyan hair and hands with the USB logo on them. * While helping one of my mother's friends move, [[Tropers/EvilFuzzy9 I]] came across a strange... ''thing''. It was a stool, a step-ladder, and an ironing board, all in one. Also, it was of Amish make. So it was, essentially, an Amish-step-ironing-stool... or would you call it an Amish-step-stool-board...? Amish-ironing-ladder-stool? * This troper had a dream with elements of this. During the [[ChristieTime 1930s-1940s]] a [[FiveBadBand group of evil]] [[TheUndead undead]] [[SteamPunk Steampunk]] [[FurryFandom furries]] reside in a [[HauntedHouse haunted house]]. But there is a backstory of how they became undead and evil. During the [[VictorianLondon late 1800s]] they were once [[AdventurerArchaeologist archaeologists]]. At one point they explored ancient Egyptian ruins. However they come across the tomb of a vengeful spirit that curses them for entering it, hence their current forms. This tomb belonged to an ancient Egyptian noble. Like the evil undead Steampunk furries, there is a backstory of how he got into his current form of evil ancient Egyptian spirit. Back in [[AncientEgypt ancient Egyptian]] times, he was a well-respected ancient Egyptian noble. However, he got into an [[YourCheatingHeart adulterous relationship]] with a [[{{Lolicon}} 14 year old girl]], the daughter of another noble. When his equals and family eventually find out about this relationship, [[PedoHunt they are furious]] and [[ThePunishment damn him]] into the form he is today. Strangely enough, my dream never explains what, if anything, [[DoubleStandard happened]] to the consenting 14 year old girl of the relationship. But yeah, my dreams are [[WhatDoYouMeanItWasntMadeOnDrugs really weird]]... * In a friend's self-made roleplaying game, this troper was allowed to create a [[ChurchMilitant monk]] who fights with GunsAkimbo and GunFu as well as RealityWarper powers. Oh, and he powers up by doing religious drugs. It was [[CrazyAwesome awesome]]. * [[{{Diamondex}} I]] am an actor/writer/lawyer/singer/creative consultant/playwright/engineer. [[CaseyAndAndy I plan to take lessons on bovine dentistry this weekend.]] * I'm a straghr ally for the LGBT. Well It once lead me to the excange "How can you suprt somthing if you are not one of them?" "Cool I'm a cyborge dolphin ninja." * I will create the Hayekian Socialism. * One day I was feeling especially crazy and was frantically yelling some ideas at my friends over Xbox Live, including: ** Giant humanoid monster made of a thousand hobos. With Train car nunchucks. ** Flesh eating snowmobiles.

** Devilchucks: two lil' imp demons tied together at the tail. Each with pitchfork nunchucks. ** Zombie polar bear in a minecart with android spider legs. * One day, this troper and two of his friends got really bored, so we decided to take turns doodling on paper. What did we end up with? A flying unicorn with sparkly pants, a cape, a mustache, golden hooves, a rainbow tail, and an eye patch, of course! You know what that means, right? [[NinjaPirateZombieRobot A French Super Rainbow Pirate Unicorn!]] * [[Tropers/KatanaCat My]] main character in ''AdventureQuest'' has trained in a lot of classes, including Shapeshifter, Beastmaster, Scholar, Rogue, Mage, Dragonslayer, Dracomancer (is that what the guys who're the opposite of Dragonslayers are called?), and some things I can't remember. I'd say I trained as a lycan, but those werewolf class quests have a habit of ending with me owing Death another favor. Oh, and I have a bad habit of coming up with these, usually for games: ** Xe Invasion VS Ebony Shadespine: The title character is a [[BadassFurry badass skunk]] in [[ActionGirl her]] late teens who [[HalfDressedCartoonAnimal doesn't wear any clothes because everything's already covered with fur]]. [[OneManArmy Is fighting the Xe alone]] [[MamaBear because seeing them attack her friend Daisy (a cat she sees as her little sister )]] [[BerserkButton pushed her]] [[Determinator a little too far]]. Oh, and the Xe are [[FeatheredFiend birdlike]] [[AlienInvasion aliens]] that want to TakeOverTheWorld. ** Xe Invasion VS Ninja Cats: Still in the works as I'm not sure what to do about programming it. A [[AmazingTechnicolorWildlife purple]] [[EverythingsCuterWithKittens cat]] and [[ActionGirl her]] [[YouGottaHaveBlueHair blue-furred]] little brother with CloudCuckoolander tendencies fight the aforementioned aliens, and they just happen to be [[InstantAwesomeJustAddNinja ninjas]] with [[AnimeHair Anime Fur]]. * [[Tropers/PulpoOscuro This Troper]] ''loves'' to create these in {{Spore}}. He's made a [[MacrossMissileMassacre rocket-launching]] [[MundaneUtility Learjet]] [[BagOfHolding that carries money]] [[FrickinLaserBeams and shoots lasers]] [[CrazyAwesome while powered by scramjets]], a [[ThisIsADrill drill-equipped]] [[TankGoodness tank]] [[MoreDakka with a machine gun on the top]] [[LightningBruiser that could move at ~50 miles an hour]], and a giant, armor-plated insect that could shoot slime out of its forehead. * [[{{Tropers/Zandercan}} This dude]] is planning to pull together a play-by-post containing a SteamPunk AmericanCivilWar era setting with [[CatGirl nekomimi]], [[OurDemonsAreDifferent demons]], [[FunctionalMagic functional]] [[MagicRealism self-propagating]] magic, and a pair of FingerlessGloves that function as a TeleportCloak (one's for personal use only, the other's for teleporting others, and using both functions simultaneously [[spoiler:[[BlessedWithSuck gifts the wearer with immortality at the cost of his soul]]]]). * This troper is a Korean author who plans writing an anime with Western audiences in mind. Does that count? If that doesn't, the said project definitely counts, although it's leaning toward to GenreBusting. * [[@/{{AgentDragonhunter}} This Troper]] once had a conversation

ending in this: Me: Hey, this store has Wi-Fi! (beat) Something tells me that in a few years, every building will have WiFi. Dad: Or we'll have even better technology to use. Me: Or we'll be at war with robots. Or aliens. Or zombies. Or [[NinjaPirateZombieRobot Robot Alien Zombies]]! Dad: That's one possible outcome. ---Return to NinjaPirateZombieRobot. ---<<|TropeTropes|>>

NintendoHard * For a non-video game example, [[DiscoGlacier This Troper]] had [[{{Understatement}} immense]] difficulty with his second college semester of Spanish (the equivalent of semesters 3 & 4 of high school Spanish). Having only had a semester of Spanish the summer before, in only a span of six weeks, he struggled to shine amongst his more linguistically-refined peers as he drained himself just to keep up with the lightning-fast pace of the class. He was only able to do even a satisfactory job if he had Google Translate by his side, even if he made stupid mistakes like [[YouFailGeographyForever confusing Puerto Rico with Costa Rica]]; tests were a lost hope altogether. Even lampshaded by his teacher when she looked at my first in-class assignment (having to write ''an entire paragraph in Spanish'' on an assigned topic) and said, [[ThisIsGonnaSuck "You're going to have a lot of trouble in this class."]] Indeed, this class remains the ''only'' failing grade in ''all'' his classes, starting with middle school. * "i thank you God for most this amazing day" and "When David Heard" by Eric Whitacre. If the fact that one has a part where the women alternate A/G chords and the other is in 18 parts...well...yeah. ** This troper's college classes. It's really quite amazing how big of a difference there is between what's on the exams and what's on every other piece of study material that a college student would have access to. ** This troper's experience from high school pre-cal to college calculus was this. She's BrilliantButLazy, so all her life she's been able to just sit in class, draw in a sketchbook, never take one note, and ''still'' make As and Bs. This was also true of her high school pre-cal class. When she went to college, she took a placement test that allowed her to skip college algebra, geometry, and pre-cal and jump straight into college calculus. The first week of calculus was a review of high school pre-cal...and then suddenly the teacher stopped making any sense, almost as if he'd started speaking a foreign

language. This troper dropped the class and changed her major from marine biology to art; she never understood why you'd need calculus to work at Sea World training dolphins and feeding fish anyway, so she decided to make video games instead. * [[TrumpyCanDoMagicThings This troper]] spent 12 years, from kindergarten to his senior year of high school, trying to beat the third level of "Battletoads in Battlemaniacs" for the Super Nintendo Entertainment System. During his senior year of high school, he FINALLY managed to get past that level, only to find the next level was arguably even harder: level four is made almost entirely of [[SpikesOfDoom Instant Death Spikes]]! Unbelievably, after several weeks or maybe a month of intense practice, he ended up beating the entire game (which incidentally consisted of only 6 levels and two bonus levels). His triumph was recorded on videotape by a friend for posterity. ** [[{{SAMAS}} This Troper]] beat that stage (and many of the others later) the hard way (reflexes and memorization, plus a Game Genie with the Infinite Lives cheat), but when playing ''{{Contra}}: Hard Corps'' had to tape down the fire button and leave the game on for a couple of days until he had huge stock of lives before beating it. He started playing with about eighty-something lives, and had less than ''thirty'' left when he finally won. ** Dude, you call an infinite lives cheat on Game Genie the hard way? The game only has one cheat itself, for about two or three extra lives and continues, and I (the troper whose 12 year oddysee was outlined above) beat it using just that (I think later I beat it without that cheat as well, just for an added challenge, and trust me, that game NEVER gets much easier no matter how many times you beat it). Other than that, just memorization and reflexes, as you said. Still, I applaud your ingenuity on Contra. I've not played that one, and from the tale of that may lives being decimated, I'm now afraid to. *** The reason why ''Contra: Hard Corps'' is so difficult is because, just like in the other Contra games, your character [[OneHitPointWonder can only take one hit before dying]]. This seems like it goes without saying, but in the Japanese version, your character can take ''three'' hits before kicking the bucket. I'm assuming that this was changed in the U.S. version because of tradition; unfortunately, it also severely ramped up the challenge to where you ''need'' to be nigh short of a gaming god in order to tackle that game. **** Note that in the [[strike:NES]] [[DifficultyByRegion Famicom]] game you also had 3 hits. *** Similarly, This Troper spent about five or six years trying to get through the second level of the GameBoy version of ''Battletoads''. While the first level was pretty easy, a level in the style of the original game (which I didn't even know existed at the time) of which even after a few years not playing it I can probably still do without taking any damage, or at least very little. In comparison, the second level was very different, in the style of a side-scrolling 2D shooter like ''{{Gradius}}'' or ''{{R-Type}}'', where you were in a small spaceship with a laser that you could charge. The laser was useful against the first enemies, small bats that I always thought were

Spearows or Zubats from ''{{Pokemon}}'', and with the right timing a charged laser could be used to kill the recurring miniboss, a shell with wings that opened up to reveal a laser emitter [[AttackItsWeakPoint which doubled as a weak point.]] Simple so far, until you got to the spike maze, in which you have to navigate your ship through small holes in a wall of spikes which beeped and flashed before launching towards you, [[SpikesOfDoom killing you in one hit.]] It was slow and quite easy to begin with, but after about thirty seconds it became really fast and unbearable, eventually causing you to crash into the spikes and lose every pixel of health you had left. I spent hundreds of lives and continues trying to get that pattern down, and eventually I made it through to the third level, another level similar to the original game. (I kept challenging myself to do it all in one life, meaning I'd be able to carry the axe from the first level into the third la LylatWars, but sadly when I accomplished this once, I entered the third level to find Zitz fighting with his fists. Shame, because it would've made the Darkling so much easier.) * This Troper made a flash game called [[http://www.kongregate.com/games/scimitar_255/drillz Drillz]] which he designed to fit the trope (mostly by putting in strange controls). Sure enough, the biggest complaints he got from his friends was that it was too hard. He then advised them to suck it up. ** The space bar isn't working for this troper in your game. * [[Tropers/{{Dallenson}} I've]] had a hard time in the {{Escape Velocity}}: Nova mission were I have to intercept a fleet of [[{{Spacepirates}} Pirate]] vessel's, one in particular I have to disable, board, and steal data from the specific ship, Causes of fail?: 1: the target ship is destroyed, 2: My heavily modified Pirate Carrier [[{{CoolStarship}} Unrelenting]] gets raped by the fleet,[[{{Understatement}} it was kinda tough]] to beat the mission * This troper, a HUGE fan of {{Devil May Cry}}, immediately vowed to never play the special edition of the third game when I learned the default difficulty was easier than in the regular edition. I LIKED the controller-breaking challenge of playing that game for the first time. ** This troper remembers numerous reviewers of the Special Edition made the same complaint, and fails to understand why NO ONE seems to notice that the default difficulty level from the previous version (listed in the Special Edition as Normal Mode) is also available right from the start. Is the mere existence of an optional easier difficulty level that much of an insult to all those challenge-seekers? * [[RegShoe I]] have spent years off and on trying to DOCK in Elite without access to a joystick. Joystick was hard, MOUSE AND KEYBOARD DO NOT WORK! * [[{{Wheezy}} This troper]] has beaten Need For Speed Underground (mentioned in the main page) and several other racing games, and considered himself pretty good at that genre... That is, until Gran Turismo 2's simulation mode bent him over his PS 1. For one, the AI cars travel in tight packs, so they're either slightly ahead of you, or slightly behind you, so if you make a mistake, all of them will fly right past you, leaving you desperately trying to catch up from last place. Less than two seconds can make the difference between first and

last. And please, don't even get him started on the license tests, lest he resort to {{Cluster F Bomb}}s. The strange thing is that no one else he's talked to found the game all that hard. ** I admit, the game becomes less infuriating the more you upgrade your car. It still fits this trope in places, though. ** This troper once missed gold on a license test by .001 of a second. He immediately summoned a friend to document the event for posterity. ** Sounds a bit like a case of {{The Computer Is A Cheating Bastard}} to me. * This troper could never beat the final stage of ''Mario Party''[='=]s Minigame Island. [[ScrappyLevel Slot Car Derby 2]] [[DethroningMomentOfSuck FOR THE LOSE]]. ** Another ''MarioParty'' example: this troper is currently raging at the Beach Volley Folly mode in the fourth game. You have to win six matches in a row to unlock the Free Mode and several new characters for it. If you lose, you have to start again from the first one. The problem now is the last one- the match against Bowser and Bowser Jr. For one thing, the opposing team has an advantage since Bowser's so big that he can cover about half the court. Then there's the computer partner... Most of the time they don't do anything to try to win, only occasionally ''not'' sending the ball right toward one of the opponents. Even worse, sometimes they try to "help" by blocking the ball, without warning, and if they don't get it right it just results in the ball veering off its originally marked course and giving the other team a point. Even pausing a lot to make it easier to gauge where the ball's going to end up doesn't seem to help, and this troper doesn't know anyone else who plays the game to take over from the computer... * This troper's male friend apparently once had an orgasm while playing Pikmin 2. ** ...I see the connection. But you know, I'm tempted to start adding near non-sequitors to these pages just to see if anyone reads 'em. Also, your friend had better have a darn good reason for ''that''. ** I'm sure there's an interesting story that goes with that. The question is whether or not I want to know. * This troper has lost count of the number of times he has played "The President's Run," the last level of Driver, without success. (It must be somewhere in the hundreds.) Between the rain-slickened streets, your suddenly-slower-than-everything-else car, and insane enemies, the level is just brutal. One magazine pointed out that it is pretty much impossible to do this without some [[LuckBasedMission luck]] on your side; skill alone just won't cut it. But the premise is so off-thewall crazy (the mob decides to kidnap the president; suddenly you have the president in your car and both mobsters ''and cops'' are trying to smash your car into oblivion) and the game is so fun that one can forgive it. ** [[{{Wheezy}} This troper]] has continued his PlayStation kick with Driver 2, a game whose missions in all four levels swing wildly from ItsEasySoItSucks to beyond NintendoHard. The games's cops, and some of the mission goals, are famous for their insanity. * This troper cannot play ''any'' SNES game she has. Super Mario World,Mega Man X,Super Mario All-Stars or, The Lion King (oh, and some

beat em ups). She has spent countless hours of her young childhood playing, and watching her uncle play, those games. Yet,she can't get one-tenth into the games. Thus,she doesn't touch her SNES. Though,she can't play Kingdom Hearts 1 or Pikmin 1,either.. ** I don't think that's a problems with the ''games''... * Unwilling example: PC version of ''Crimson Skies'' without a functioning joystick. Some of the levels were OK, but the "do you want to skip this mission?" screen began appearing as soon as stunt flying got involved. * [[NeoSilverThorn This Troper]] will happily boast to beating a few Nintendo Hard games- Blaster Master, Metroid, and a couple of the SNES Star Wars games- but has also used cheats on other games because it was preferable to trying to eat the controller. * This troper has started to refer to ''[[SonicTheHedgehog Sonic and the Secret Rings]]'' (particularly its Perfect Challenge- beat the stage without taking a hit- and No Pearls- ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin, beat the stage while dodging every pearl, which also means never killing an enemy since they give you pearls- missions) as "[[IWannaBeTheGuy I Wanna Be The Sonic]]". They have the same unforgiving difficulty as IWannaBeTheGuy, and ''none'' of the amusing explodey deaths. "This just isn't my day!" "This just isn't my day!" "This just isn't my day!" "This just isn't my day!" "This just isn't my day!" "This just isn't my-" * jabs power button with great force* ** Getting the Emeralds in ''Sonic 2''. Between the freaking bombs and the very finicky hitbox for grabbing rings, it hard enough just getting enough rings. Even if you have catlike reflexes, if you aren't playing Sonic alone, Tails is TheLoad in Special Stages (despite being useful in the main game). He's always getting hit during the delay between Sonic's jump and his, not to mention taking time to get back behind Sonic. SaveScumming is about your only hope. * This troper, after a long hiatus from his Gamecube, decided to pick up ''MarioParty 7'' and start the Solo Party, to see how far he'd get. First level went fine. Second, OK. At the third game board, he abruptly remembered exactly '''why''' his copy of ''MarioParty 2'' was mothballed. TheComputerIsACheatingBastard! * This troper would like to personally find the person who came up with ''DJMAX Portable Black Square''[='=]s Club Tour missions and punch him in the face. * ''StreetFighter II Turbo HD Remix'' is a straight bastard with a stock XBox360 controller. ** FUCKING THIS. I can't get the "defeat Akuma" achievement. You need to beat every character on a single continue. Even on the easiest level, with best 3 out of 5 (so you have more of a chance to pull a comeback), the closest I've come was with Chun-Li, I got to Vega (only character left is Sagat, then Akuma), I won the first 2, he came back the next 2, I lost the 5th game, with both of us down to no health, I jumped in the air, kicked, only for him to do his bullshit aerial throw and kill me. Then I threw the controller across the room. * This troper once spent an entire HOUR trying to figure out how to [=McTwist=] over the helicopter in Tony Hawk's Underground. After he was done, he threw his controller on the floor and gave up. I still haven't figured it out...

** That might have been the best for you then, 'cause the game only got harder from there. Wanna know what the final challenge is? You have to chase your rival and match his every single move while he makes an impressive line through the first level of the game. He's incredibly fast, has perfect stats, does super-amazing jumps that require pixel-perfect precision to make, and IIRC, you're also on a time limit. Oh, and he also throws Molotov Cocktails behind him, meaning you have to dodge fire while you're doing all this. *** Well, I considered the McTwist the helicopter goal kinda easy (try and Boneless to get some extra air, and if that doesn't work, turn on Moon Gravity), as was the final goal (mind you, i've played the game MANY times over, therefore I know the goals down pat). And the final goal, you only need to play it once to beat the game (on all subsequent playthroughs, [[spoiler: your character punches Eric in the face upon his mentioning of the goal. Fitting, considering that Eric became a JerkAss later in the game.]] *** This troper considered the last level in Tony Hawk's Underground to be very easy. He doesn't remember how many times he had to redo it, but if it wasn't finished on his first try, he's pretty sure it was on his second or third. * This troper ''cannot'' play ''Ultimate MortalKombat 3''. She cannot hit anyone in "Very Easy" mode, with the opponents handicap at zero. There's also ''The LionKing'' for the SNES, but that's another story, since that game ''is'' a well known Nintendo Hard. * In a non-game example. This troper wound up repeating Integral Calculus to the point of nervous breakdown because one slight instance of [[LIsForDyslexia Dysgraphia]] can waste 10-15 minutes ... of a 1 hour timed test. * This Troper has yet to beat the [[ScrappyLevel Sacred Grounds]] in CaveStory. ** Made even more frustrating because he used up his Life Pot after the PointOfNoReturn, when he ''couldn't get another''. * This troper couldn't finish the RTS Homeworld without cheats. I got to the Asteroid level, after battle after battle of skirmish type battles you can build forces, you get stopped in the middle of nowhere, with a giant asteroid being flung at the mothership, I realised I didn't have enough ships to kill it before it would kill my mothership and lose the game. Apparently I missed the memo about needing to steal more enemy ships than you build yourself. * This troper happens to ''suck'' at platformers and always manages to lose too many lives way too early in the game. While I love the old Sonic and Mario games, I can never come close to beating any of them. * One game that has haunted [[NicholasOnimura this troper]] for so many years was [[TheProblemWithLicensedGames Virtual]] [[TheSimpsons Bart]] for the {{SEGA Genesis}}. You go through six virtual experiences, half of them being regular platformers, and all of them are hard as hell. Said troper has eventually resorted to Game Genie codes and save states in order to put the game out of his misery once and for all. * Persona3 is the only game I have ever played where my hero (and thus the party) regularly gets one-shotted by regular enemies while grinding.

* ''SpaceInvaders Extreme''. Two words: [[HarderThanHard Extreme]] difficulty. * [[CRBWildcat This troper]] has, to this date... ** ...never beaten the original TeenageMutantNinjaTurtles NES game without cheating. Most of it, even the dam stage and the instant death spikes near the end of the Airbase area, weren't that difficult. But after getting inside the Technodrome, his guys keep dying on him before he could reach the Shredder. *** [[RobertBingham This troper]] had the same damned experience with that game. And I remember why I couldn't reach the Shredder as well -those [[GoddamnedBats goddamned]] [[DemonicSpiders laser soldiers]]! Their lasers did more damage than anything else in the game and could be fired diagonally, and the only way to kill them quickly was by spamming your scroll weapon, which you need for the Shredder himself. ** ...was, as a child of four, convinced that Glass Joe... '''Glass...Joe...''' of ''Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!'' fell into this category. He started up the game once, saw him and thought: "What am I doing?" before taking out the cartridge and never touching it again. Thankfully, he knows better now. ** ...grew up during the NES era and got to play a lot of games, from the well-known Super Mario to this weird spelunking game which name escapes him. Of all of them, only the three SMB games and some assorted sports titles were within his reach gameplay-wise, and others were only beaten a decade later after having had some time to grow up. * RARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [[ScrappyLevel F* cking]] [[TheLegendofZelda Water Temple!]] ** RARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! F* cking [[TheLegendofZelda first game]]!!! ** [[TheLegendOfZeldaSpiritTracks Phytops]]. [[AtomicFBomb FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]] * For [[{{LoneCentrist}} This Troper]], any of the old Disney games that were produced by Virgin Interactive... often resulted in a RageQuit... at 6... ** [[{{goodtimesfreegrog}} This troper]] feels your pain. He never even beat the fifth level of that damned ''LionKing'' game until a good seven years after first getting the game. * This troper hasn't given up on learning parallel programming yet, but there is a good chance he won't really cut it in this decade or the next. I would say [[http://developers.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=07/05/29/0058246 it is Nintendo Hard]], though there are even those who do it on a regular basis who consider it pretty tough as well as those who think it's not that hard (and will AscendToAHigherPlaneOfExistence eventually, incidentally). * [[PentiumMMX2 This troper]] has yet to finish ''[[TheLegendOfZelda Zelda II: The Adventure of Link]]''. He's been playing the game on and off from a timespan of 2003 (When he bought his NES, along with his copy of the game) to present day; only getting as far as beating the first Palace out of sheer luck. He's yet to actually reach the 2nd palace; always dieing not far from it. ** That's the same story as [[{{Malph}} this troper]], except with the Collector's Edition version on the Gamecube. I have gotten to the 2nd

palace a few times, but by that point I only have 1 life and very little health. ** This troper has beaten the FIRST TEMPLE of Zelda II all of ONCE. Ugh. * This troper has had almost a 10 year losing streak on the second level arcade game needed to get the Nintendo Coin in [[DonkeyKong64 Donkey Kong 64]]. ** Same here. I finally beat it last summer and began working on getting all 200 Golden Bananas (not counting the bonus one you get for getting all the other ones), only to get stuck just 4 away from the goal[[hottip:*: In case you're wondering which 4: the 2 Beaver Bothers in Creepy Castle, The Beetle Race in Crystal Cave, and the 2nd Rabbit Race in Fungi Forest]]. * This troper has, after four years and countless re-starts (i.e. from the beginning), finally beaten FireEmblem (the one with Lyn and Hector). Even after screwing his "Tactics" score by LevelGrinding a bunch of characters to level 20 in the arena at the Port of Badon, the game was still a challenge. * This Troper once made an extremely hard flash game for a friend to play. ** It ended with the first jump unfinished and the game deleted. * Thought playing ''Tetris'' with traditional controls was hard enough? Then you should try ''Typomino'' and ''[[http://sites.google.com/site/ddrkirby/keyblox Keyblox]]'', which are ''Tetris'' clones where you "type" the pieces into place. This troper, with a good clone and ideal settings, can clear 40 lines in under a minute, but on ''Keyblox'', it takes him three minutes, or two and a half on a good run. * ''Gradius III'', arcade version. This troper is of the belief that it's easier to one-credit ''{{Mushihime-sama}} Futari Black Label''[='=]s [[HarderThanHard God mode]] than that. * The lion king plain and simple This Troper has played hakuna matata for years trying to learn what to do I got the game when I was 4 I'm 13 now [[BerserkButton AND JUST BEAT THE DAMN GAME]] thats 9 years on hakuna matata * This Troper CANNOT for the life of him beat ''[[TouhouProject Undefined Fantastic Object]]'' or ''[[TouhouProject Subterranean Animism]]''. He can get through the first two stages without a hitch, beat Stage 3 losing one or two lives, start messing up on Stage 4, and lose most of my lives or die on Stage 5, before being finished off by Stage 6. On [[EasyModeMockery Easy]]. ** I find UFO and SA pretty easy, with the bullet hitboxes being obvious. "[TouhouProject Embodiment of Scarlet Devil]]", though... So much ragequitting... I'll beat you, Remilia. One day... * This troper has played his share of BulletHell shooters. He's onecredited ''{{Mushihime-sama}} Futari Black Label'' on Original (as unbelievable as it sounds[[hottip:* :to people who [[PublicMediumIgnorance only know of the game through its Ultra and God Mode final bosses]]]]), reached stage 3 of God Mode, one-credited two ''Touhou'' games on Normal, crossed 4 1/2 stages of ''{{DoDonPachi}}''[='=]s six, and can complete the Stage 7 series on ''[=rRootage=]''. None of these shooters compare up to ''Image

Fight''. Irem-style TrialAndErrorGameplay, annoying manual fire, and a hardly-useful pod launch attack make for a very hard experience. He can't get past the ''first stage'' as of this writing. This is how balls hard ''Image Fight'' is. ** If you thought ''Image Fight'' was ''that hard'', just wait until you play ''{{R-Type}} II'', or even ''{{R-Type}} I'', for that matter. * This troper never managed to beat Battletoads & Double Dragon, thanks to that awful spaceship stage. I did rent this game at least once per month during a whole year, but never, EVER got past that stage. The problem isn't the enemy positioning, it's the controls that make it awfully hard: instead of just moving the ship with the D-Pad and shooting with one button, you change the direction with left and right and move with A. For example, if you're moving right, and need to turn up, instead of pressing up you need to hold left until it turns up. ** Exactly the same problem mate,I even tried to play it with my friend as 2nd Player and we failed that spaceship stage so much because of damn controls * This troper never touched DigimonWorld3 after entering a boss fight in wich his normal attacks froze all my digimon while dealing high damage and preventing me from using items. Basically I just kept pressing X to skip the "Agumon is frozen!" and "Mamemon attacks!" windows. * For me, of all things, {{Kirby}}'s Pinball Land. For many years, I wasn't allowed to get a game console, so I was stuck with my old GameBoy. I got that game Christmas 1996, the day I got my GameBoy. Six years later, I was finally allowed to get a Gamecube, for Christmas 2002. I couldn't sleep the night before, so I picked up my GameBoy and put in Kirby's Pinball Land. At 4:30 AM, two and a half hours before my parents were willing to wake up so I could open my Gamecube, I finally beat it. A very real victory, yes, but looking back, it nearly seems symbolic of my graduation from simple handheld games into the more complex world of console gaming. * [[PlatformHell Super-difficult Megawads]] for Doom II anyone? (For more fun, play those level packs with [[GameMod randomizer mods]] and... enjoy.) * This Troper has been playing Super Mario Brothers Deluxe for Gameboy Color since she got it for Christmas in third grade. I'm now a sophomore in college and still stuck on world 4-3. I've gone through warp tunnels to get near the end and finish the game, but I've never played it all the way through because of that one damn level. ** you do know about the warp zone trick in world 1-2 ( warp to worlds 2, 3, & 4.)and i believe 4-2 ( world 5, 6, 7, 8), right? They're on the NES and All-Stars version, so I guess its on deluxe? * {{Fighting Game}}s. And I don't mean crappy CPU opponents. I mean ''human'' opponents. * This troper was playing ResonanceOfFate a little while back, and enjoying it. Then he entered a red hex on the map and his level 40 party got stuck in a fight with three level 70 enemies. Then he realized that his last save was at the start of the chapter, and there was literally no way of getting out of the fight without beating the enemies. RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAGEQUIT!

* [[BitTrip Bit Trip Runner]] BIT TRIP RUNNER '''BIT TRIP RUNNER ARRRRGGGGGHHH!!!'''. * Skate 2 was hard enough for this troper, who gave up on the pro challenges a long time ago, but now that Skate 3 is out, he's finished literally everything in the game, except for the Trick List Trials on the Own The Lot challenges. There is always one thing that cannot possibly be done in the short time limit without a miraculous glitch, such as doing a 720 in a normal bowl area. * I screwed up majorly in Pokemon Diamond. Pokemon Diamond is generally not Nintendo Hard, but there is ONE way to make it such: let Dialga get away. Then it becomes the hardest Pokemon game to date. ** How? This troper has never used a legendary Pokemon as part of his team and still easily wins over every other trainer. ** The final battles with Team Galactic and the E4 can be quite tough, but indeed you shouldn't need to rely on a legendary just to beat them. In fact Dialga itself can be pretty useless against the E4 unless you've trained it well. * It took this troper ''twelve years'' to beat ''{{Castlevania}} III''. * The damn ReBoot PlayStation game. Over ten years later, I still haven't managed to get past the first section of Baudway without cheat codes - which have only gotten me to the third part of Baudway. * [[{{Tropers/Joerc45}} This troper]] had quite a difficult time with ''{{Dragon Quest VIII}}''. He actually died a few times before fighting [[spoiler:Khalamari]]. On the flip side, [[spoiler:Dhoulmagus]] was quite a breeze for him. This was partly in due to the fact that he [[LevelGrinding level grinded]] enough to the point where [[SquishyWizard Jessica]] had access to all of her most powerful spells, and made extensive use of the alchemy pot to make all of the best weapons and armor in the game. {{Digital Devil Saga}}, on the [[RageQuit other hand...]] * This troper can beat any EliteBeatAgents song with a score of A, but he still can't get past the first half of Jumpin' Jack Flash in Hard Rock mode. * It took this troper 6 years (after release) to FINALLY gain the confidence (and patience) to beat that one REQUIRED task: beating the Donkey Kong arcade twice in Donkey Kong 64. For that N64 coin. Seriously, Nintendo, why one life?! And why that extra level? * If [[{{HaloReach}} Halo: Reach]] (specifically "The Package") isn't Nintendo [[PrecisionFStrike Fucking]] Hard, nothing is. [[{{Theoneyoucallwe}} I]] have a tendency to scream in fury and [[{{RageQuit}} Ragequit]] repeatedly. But I always come back. ''Always.'' * [[{{Tropers/Pokenatic}} This Troper]] managed to get two stars overall on ''MarioKart Wii'' in four months. Doesn't sound like NintendoHard does it? Guess how long it took me to get the coveted three stars? [[hottip:*: I't been a year since I hit two stars and I ''still'' haven't gotten it yet.]] * It took me four years to beat just one ''fucking'' mission in Jak II. Four. Years. ** What, just one mission? Jak II is NintendoHard incarnate for the Playstation. [[{{Tropers/DeathToSquishies}} This editor]] is not sure

if this is the mission you're talking about, but he always got screwed over by the on-rails turret mission where you must shoot down flying Krimzon Guards and a couple of ships at the mining site. It's possible enough on the normal runthrough, but [[NewGamePlus Hero Mode]] is when the shit ''really'' hits the fan. Since you get the best cheats so early on, including Invincibility, you're normally just taking Hero Mode for granted by the 10th mission or so. Then you hit that level, and you realize that Invincibility [[OhCrap doesn't apply to vehicles, including turrets.]] Cue not being able to ever get past that mission on Hero Mode until two years later when you have already played through normal again and had some practice. The hard part is taking down the 40+ Guards at the beginning of the mission, really; taking down the airships is relatively easy. ** This trope, along with the fact that the whole atmosphere is DarkerAndEdgier, is why this troper dislikes [[JakAndDaxter Jak II]]. Jak III is a bit better (she hasn't played Jak X, Daxter, or TLF), but the original is still her favorite. * D&D match, one incapacitated party member, three wounded, twelve turns to defeat a dragon before a plot device overloads and kills us all off. Also, the dragon has twice as much power as all of us put together, was immune to fire (what our mage specialized in), [[ItGotWorse and could heal itself AND attack, TWICE. EVERY. TURN.]]. We won on the last turn by sheer luck, all of any items that could heal in any way, and our now permanantly dead friend. * This troper recieved the first MegaManX for SNES on his fourth or fifth birthday, or something like that, he was very young. It took him until he was around 14 to beat it. * This troper got Arc Rise Fantasia for Christmas and every fricking boss in this game is ridiculously difficult. * I bought LostMagic a few months after its release. I found myself unable to beat the second fire mission. I ended up grinding to the level cap before beating the ''second'' boss, because that was the only way I could clear the missions that would let me reach her. And even at the level cap, I had trouble with the third boss. And don't get me started on that evil light mage (not Isaac's dad, the other one). And after all that, which took me around four-five months, I came to the mission that unlocks triple runes. And this is where I have been stuck up to the time of writing. Either I die before I can get anything accomplished, or time runs out. The whole mission seems to be designed in such a way that no matter what strategy you use, you're screwed somehow. I could write multiple paragraphs about everything that makes it a pain in the ass. * ''Persona3'' (Please note I only play the ''FES'' version, I hear the original is much easier) and ''Persona4'' are some of my favorite games but getting cheap-shotted over and over is a real pain in the ass. I remember in Persona 3 there is an early game boss with way more health than other enemies at that point, that resists all four elements, can cast party-wide elemental spells to take advantage of your weaknesses (and due to the way that Persona 3 works hitting a character with a weakness not only renders them unable to do anything on the next turn but also GIVES THE ENEMY ANOTHER TURN) cause partywide "Panic" which renders characters unable to use their Persona (so

say goodbye to all your most reliable methods of damage-dealing and healing!) and of course, it can ''heal itself''. Oh, wait, did I say there was only one of this boss? Silly me, there's '''''three of them at the same time.''''' And you will be fighting them when you are around level '''''5'''''. Oh, and getting hit with an instant-death spell is fun too, because in those games it doesn't matter how well the rest of the party is doing, [[WeCannotGoOnWithoutYou if the main character dies it's game over.]] And in ''Persona4'' the less said about [[ThatOneBoss Shadow Yukiko]] the better... * It took this troper ''eight years'' of playing to finally see (one of) the true ending(s) of GigaWing. First played in the summer of 2000; first one-credit-clear achieved on July 30, 2008. * [[BearyScary I]] subvert and enforce this trope on a regular basis. Most of my NintendoHard games stem from that very era, leading me to avoid PlatformHell type games like the plague even if they're generally quite fun. Mario games are a lot harder than anyone gives them credit for. * This troper finally got the gem (and the key from the Cortex bonus round) in {{Crash Bandicoot}}'s {{That One Level}}, Sunset Vista, after having the game for 15 years. And he is not even done yet. Money well spent. * I've tried numerous times to beat ShinMegamiTenseiNocturne. I think the furthest I've gotten is the halfway point in the game, wherever that might be. And people wonder why I call Nocturne an alumnus from the School of NintendoHard Knocks. * I have beaten Dragon Quest/Warrior I. I have never found Erdrick's sword, even following Nintendo Power walkthru maps. * This troper will never win as the Japanese in the Battle of Nomonhan (better known as the Battle of Khalkhin Gol, fought in 1939) in the The Operational Art of War 3. The Soviets easily outclass the Japanese and can just fortify themselves around the important river crossings. * For [[Tropers/TacoNinja This one]]: The last three songs + Through the Fire and Flames on Guitar Hero 3 on Hard mode (I can do Cliffs of Dover) or was it Expert...? It's been a while. * Sigma Stage 2 in Mega Man X6. The entire game was [[SequelDifficultySpike quite a shock]] compared to X5, but Sigma Stage 2...[[UpToEleven Ho.]] [[BeyondTheImpossible ly.]] [[PlatformHell Shit.]] Not only are there SpikesOfDoom '''everywhere''', but you have to fight about five or six of [[DemonicSpiders those damn totem poles that constantly shoot at you.]] And some of them you have to fight in situations like [[http://i51.tinypic.com/j795wi.jpg this,]] with SpikesOfDoom on either side waiting for you if you make one mistake, which you can often dash into because the air dash was oh-so-thoughtfully remapped to the '''X BUTTON!''' The stage practically ''begs'' for you to use Shadow X so that the spikes won't kill you (and so [[SequenceBreaking you can skip all but two of the totem poles.]] [[WhosLaughingNow Heh heh.]]). Oh, but wait; if you do that, the ''second part'' of the stage ([[ItGotWorse that's right]]) requires an armor that can air dash to get through, effectively making the level {{Unwinnable}}. It ''is'' possible to make it through with Shadow X without the air dash, but you need the Hyper Dash and Jumper parts equipped, and

[[GuideDangIt there's no hint on how to do that, or even that you can do that.]] And to top it all off, you get not one, but '''two''' bosses to fight; High Max and Gate, both of which are the [[PuzzleBoss puzzle bosses from hell,]] and the latter of which takes place in [[http://i53.tinypic.com/6qzhxi.jpg this...death trap.]] That has to be the hardest level in the entire MegaMan series. And now after I got through all that, [[PolygonCeiling I get to play X7 next.]] [[ThisIsGonnaSuck Joy.]] * This troper literally spent about [[ThisIsSparta FOUR]] [[PrecisionFStrike FUCKING]] [[ThisIsSparta YEARS]] trying to beat Robot Warlords before finally admitting defeat. I recently tried to play it again and couldn't get past the second level, the same level I took three years to beat (and, even then, probably through pure luck, I can't remember how I beat it). Bear in mind I beat Oni without using a walkthrough and it took maybe two years to finally beat that...for ONE ending! * ''EtrianOdyssey III''. You think ''ShinMegamiTensei'' is bad? Atlus's other signature RPG series will give SMT a run for its money. Because the EO series provides a wider variety of customization, there's also more opportunities to screw up. It doesn't help that, in [=EO3=] at least, the economy is quite stingy. It starts with you getting '''no money dropped from enemies'''--instead, you sell back the drops to the store to gain money. A little bit of it. And that's before discussing the inn, which likes to inflate its rates every few days... ---Okay, pick that controller back up and give NintendoHard another shot. <<|TropeTropes|>>

NoBiochemicalBarriers * Subverted/Handwaved in a story ThisTroper wrote. The aliens in it are mentioned to have searched billions of planets with life on them before finding a planet (Earth) with compatible life forms on it. They're still pretty much StarfishAliens, they just have the ability to reproduce using earth life. * Inverted with me and my friends from school. We are all ostensibly the same species , but we have comically incompatible diets. Several were fanatically devoted to peanut butter. However 2 of us (myself included) are violently allergic to it. My best friend asked me how I lived without peanut butter I told him the thought of eating it was like the thought of eating napalm. He said he felt the same about health food. My roommate ate only health food, and sugar affected her the way alcohol affects most people.

NoBisexuals * While [[Tropers/ZoeZoeWriter my]] mother is extremely supportive of gay rights, she gets in a "stay the fuck away from me" mood whenever the topic of my bisexuality comes up. Note that this is the same woman with a gay son. Also note this conversation: ---> Mother: Please be a lesbian.

---> ZZW: How the hell could I ''make'' myself be a lesbian? ---> Mother: [[DarthWiki/WallBanger Marry a woman.]] ---> ZZW: I would still be attracted to men too. ---> Mother: Attraction doesn't count. ---> ZZW: '''That's what sexuality is.''' * I blame this annoyingly common belief for my taking so long to realize I am bi. For all of my teenage years, I was in denial that my crushes on girls were actual crushes, thinking along the lines of my feelings for Alice can't be more than friendship because my last crush was on Bob and was definitely a crush. IGotBetter when I went to college and got a laptop where I could search the internet for answers without worrying about my family finding the search history. Now I am a proud bi woman slowly attempting to reeducate those around me about bisexuality. * I had classmates that just flat-out said I was wrong when I claimed Freddie Mercury was possibly bisexual and not gay, and also questioned if anyone could be bisexual. * One of my former friends at one point claimed that while women could be bi (and that a woman being bi was totally hot), men who identified as bi were just gay and kidding themselves. I am a closet bisexual. Did I mention he was a former friend? * I ran into this as well - unfortunately with my ''bisexual'' sister. Then again, this was the same sister who told me that I would "grow out of it" when I came out to her. I think my sister has some issues... Also, the same sister's friend believes that it is literally/physically impossible for a man to be bisexual, whereas women can be. I think it just may have to do with this friend getting turned off by teh ghey and that in American white middle-class culture the Penis is God. * I once discussed my love life and the love lives of some of my friends with a therapist under the apparently mistaken impression that professional discretion extended to sexual orientation. When I brought up a bisexual friend, the therapist interrupted to inquire, doubtfully, whether my friend wasn't just unsure of what she wanted and in a stage of questioning. This was a ''former'' therapist. * While most of my friends are cool with the idea of Bisexuality, my mother has the hardest time with the concept. After many discussions with her about my sexuality I'm still fairly certain that she thinks that my having a boyfriend means I've "decided" I'm gay. Bisexuality just doesn't seem to be a concept that she can grok. * My girlfriend says that bisexuals are just disgusting whore-people, you are either gay or straight. Then she says she's a lesbian. I have yet to decide if that is a compliment or an insult to my masculinity. * When I came out as Bi, people tended to ask me "Are you sure you're not just turning into a lesbian?" or "Are you jsut using that as a cover so you won't feel weird about being a lesbian?" It really pissed me off because I do have a boyfriend that I seriously love, and people think that just because I said I'm BI means i don't really love him or are jsut in denial. It's who I am, not some cover story. * I came out as bi to my mother. She said she didn't believe in bisexuality and that I was confused because I'd never dated. She does believe in homosexually but believes it's a choice and that if I did

like girls, she would have noticed when I was little. I've never brought up my bisexuality again. In her defence, she has assured me that if I did get in a relationship with a woman, while she wouldn't approve, she'd still love me and wouldn't say anything bad about the woman. * I'm pretty much omni-sexual and hang out with a pretty large group of similar folks. Most of our collective friends don't bat an eyelid at this, but there was one occasion where someone asked something along the lines of "what the hell, you were kissing a guy last week!" Response: "Yeah? And?" "Did you change your mind or something?" "Yeah, I decided I liked kissing this person more". The someone asking the question seemed incapable of wrapping their mind around the idea that someone could be bi- you're gay or you're not, no exceptions. * I kind of did this to myself for several years. Yes, I was quite confused throughout middle and high school. A couple years ago, however, I finally realized that yes, I ''am'' bi, and I'm happy like this. * [[{{rutheni}} I]] forgot that I was closeted to a bunch of my friends, and came out by accident over IM. The idea of male bisexuals who aren't faking it absolutely blew one of my (straight) friend's minds. She didn't see anything odd about female bisexuals, but... I still don't quite understand her reasoning. * Played straight (ohohohoho) in my high school. I'm the only bisexual she knows of there. Well, there's my former best friend, who I think is doing it just because of the trend, and another pansexual girl who moved away. It sure is lonely. * My mother has expressed the view that homosexuality is a-ok, but apparently doesn't believe in bisexuality. Meanwhile, roughly 75% percent of my social circle identify as bisexual, with another 5-10% being "flexible heterosexuals". * I finds myself more annoyed by a chronic inability among my friends to distinguish between the terms "bisexual" and "polyamourous" or "non-monogamous". Statements like "I could never be with a bisexual, I would never share my partner with someone else" are bad enough, but when people claim "I can't be monogamous because I'm bi" I wants to start punching. * When I have trouble explaining my orientation to bigots (or even to particularly stubborn people who just haven't heard the term before), she stops herself from getting too frustrated by reminding herself that "at least you're not coming out as bi." Seriously, of all the major orientations bisexuals seem to get the worst deal. * I met a group of people at a Ladytron show once, including a really cute gay guy. When I told them I was bi, they insisted that I should "make up my mind," and that I was "cheating". The guy was hot enough though that I still didn't mind hooking up with him though. * I took a long time to accept that I was bisexual, and when I finally admitted it to myself I was afraid to tell my friends who I'd told I was gay because I was afrad they would think I just claimed to be gay just for the attention. * I was confused for years, wondering if I was straight or a lesbian, but slowly came to accept that my attractions to certain members of both genders were undeniable. I don't plan on coming out publically

until I'm at least out of high school and have moved out of home and away from my slightly homophobic mother. I'm already TheUnFavourite, no need to add fuel to the fire. * I was briefly forced to share a rented house with a [[PsychoLesbian Psycho Lesbian]] who firmly believed that bisexual women were merely lesbians in denial. Unfortunately, she assumed that I was a lesbian upon finding out about the existence of her ex-girlfriend, then proceeded to throw an epic, months-long hissy fit upon meeting my current boyfriend. Memorable phrases from the hissy fit included "You're betraying your fellow women", "But you like girls, you can't like a man", "bisexuals are just lesbians who are too wimpy to admit it", and finally, "if you like men, you should go back to the kitchen and make me a sandwich, b*** ". Needless to say, I moved out. * I know at least two psychiatrists who flat-out deny that bisexuals exist. One of them even calls it "mere indecisiveness". Head. Desk. * [[HoYay Years]] [[HeterosexualLifePartners of]] jokes about [[{{randomfanboy}} my]] sexuality came to a head a couple of months after I broke up with my first girlfriend. My mum (perpetuator of most of the jokes) went to make a gay joke, then started to correct herself, realising 'You've had a girlfriend, obviously you aren't gay'. When I suggested that I could be bisexual, '''her head imploded'''. * [[JuiceBoxHero I]] am thought of as bisexual or lesbian by most of my social circle, though I ''myself'' do not believe that bisexuals exist. Then again, I also refuse to acknowledge the existence of heterosexuals and homosexuals (but not asexuals). There are humans that experience sexual arousal, and humans who do not. '''''Gender, and the preference of gender, are merely illusions.''''' * No one in my theatre group believed I was bisexual until I started seriously dating a girl, and was the one who got dumped (as opposed to me dumping her). Please to note that said theatre group was about 60% gay men, 40% fag hags. It always gets me up in a dander when gay men tell me that there's no such thing as another sexual orientation. * I used to constantly confuse people when I explained she was asexual, but found both genders equally interesting. Now I tell people I'm bisexual but not interested in relationships. It still confuses people. There's no way to win. * Way back in middle school I really, really, really wanted a certain girl in my class to like me and be my friend. In retrospect, I had an enormous flaming crush on her. The rest of the class figured out that I like girls long before I did, so I took crap for being the class dyke among a million other things. My parents decided I needed to be in therapy since I was depressed, and while I really liked my therapist, one of the things she told me was that there's no such thing as bisexuals. They're one or the other and haven't made up their minds yet. At the time I didn't think of myself as bi, so I didn't exactly feel badly about myself because of it. But I remember thinking that it was a really strange thing to say. I mean... it's not like whether you want your hair long or short. You're attracted to whoever you find attractive no matter what your rational mind says. What is there to make your mind up about here? ** "Way back in middle school I really, really, really wanted a

certain girl in my class to like me and be my friend." Ha, the first signs of my bisexuality were exactly the same. I actually considered it for a while (after previously having crushes on boys, so I knew I wasn't a lesbian), but when even my liberal, pro-LGBT parents reacted oddly to my hints that I wasn't completely straight, I decided there was no way that I could be out in my conservative middle school. My high school was more LGBT-accepting but still, the only people out as ''bisexual'' were the really promiscuous girls who everyone suspected were really straight and just kissing girls to titillate guys. Gays were respected, but bisexuals were not, so I suppressed it. It wasn't until college and discovering ''TheLWord'' that I decided there was no denying it anymore, I am a switch-hitter. * [[{{Turtleducks}} I]] have dated two boys before, had a huge crush on my (female) best friend for the longest time, and am now dating [[BigBlue a girl]]. My mother got very upset at the last bit when I told her, because said mother doesn't believe in bisexuality. In fact, I consider myself pansexual, not bi, with a preference for girls. * I never gave it much thought until recently, but among people I know it tends to be No Homosexuals rather than NoBisexuals. With the exception of one friend that openly identifies as gay, all of my friends are either straight or extremely open minded. * [[TromboneChild I]] was just trying to talk to my mother about how sexuality is fluid and how my generation is rather fascinated with that (and our love for StupidSexyFlanders). She just said, "Sexuality is '''not''' fluid. I don't know many bisexuals and I don't want to. You're either one or the other--hopefully the one. Sometimes you scare me." I was actually rather crushed. I'm straight with a few exceptions, but '''wow'''. I wanted to ask her if she would love me if I was gay, but I held my tongue. * [[AkatsukiDaybreak I]] have a friend whose boyfriend told her that she wasn't bisexual because she had only ever been with men, that she only said she was bisexual to be different, and that everyone was either gay or straight. Being bisexual myself, I was not amused. * [[{{QueenOfSwords}} My]] AbusiveParents chewed me out when I came out as bi, claiming that there was no such thing and that I'd "Even have sex with an animal." CompletelyMissingThePoint, anyone? (As an aside, I considers it my personal CrowningMomentOfAwesome that I finally told them off for their abuse and close-mindedness, ''loudly'', thereby humiliating them in front of the entire restaurant where they had loudly lambasted a gay couple sitting near us and quietly holding hands.) * [[{{Kriegsmesser}} My]] mother still thinks that ''[[WhatAnIdiot homo]]''[[WhatAnIdiot sexuality is a choice]], so I have no interest in seeing how she would respond to hearing that I'm ''pan''sexual and pan-romantic. (What the hell should gender have to do with who I cares about?) My friends seem to get it, (then again, half of my friends are lesbians or female-favoring bisexuals), but everyone else gives me a response akin to "What else is there? Animals?". I've simply decided to start describing myself as "bi" in public, though I do still get the NoBisexuals treatment, it's not nearly as bad. * I, when divulging my sexuality to people, generally have to say something along the lines of, "I'm bisexual. Yes, really bisexual, not

just gay and half in denial, I really do like both guys and girls". Interestingly, straight people seem more accepting of the concept than gay people, who will often still believe me to be [[NoBisexuals gay in disguise]]. * I am still a bit ticked off by the fact that my teacher at ''College'' level, while talking about demographics and voting, mentioned two possible sexualites. Granted, he also lumped Waldorf and Montissori together, but still. * I was advised by my own mother that my bisexuality was simply an attention ploy. Worth noting that this was long before the "kekekek I kiss women!" faux bisexual fad. Said mother has since apparently hoped it has slipped into the ether since I've been in a straight relationship for five years. Apparently she missed my seven year relationship with a woman in college and after. * [[BTIsaac I]] got this treatment from my cousin, who immediately started explaining that bisexuality is technically non existent, it being nothing more then a phase of a gay person coming to terms with his sexuality, and lasts a few years at most. Contrary to what I experienced, being bisexual for as long as I can remember, and only going [[HaveIMentionedIAmHeterosexualToday exclusively straight]] because I heard people say that men liking men is wrong. [[StupidSexyFlanders Awkwardness ensued]] and I decided to drop the act at the age of 19. That was 3 years ago. Still liking boys and girls to the same degree. * I am in the middle of a crisis involving my sexuality, and was on a forum when someone outright refused to acknowledge the existence of bisexuals. * A reaction to KamichamaKarin I once read went like this: --> "That girl pretends to be a guy. The redhead is BOTH gay AND straight. Is everyone in Japan this messed up?" * I'm taking a psych class in high school, and originally thought our textbook was pretty liberal (not in the political sense, the social sense) and down to earth, which was cool, since psychology has been used to justify all sorts of bigoted crap. Then I got to the section on sexual orientation, which was very nice to homosexuality (don't get me wrong, that was heartening), and then defined sexual orientation as "an attraction to either one's own sex or the opposite sex." I looked in the index, glossary, read the rest of the chapter, and there is not one mention of bisexuality in the entire book! In middle school I had crushes on both genders but nobody told me that there was such a thing as bisexuals. I was majorly confused. Where do people get off ignoring an entire orientation? It's not harmless; it's not a matter of opinion; confused & naive teenagers often end up ignoring all sources of authority and just going on the internet and risking [[BrainBleach mild trauma]] while having to determine reliability of various websites and viability of various theories for themselves, because the authority only endorses theories which are completely inapplicable to their basic experiences. Thank God for TheOtherWiki. Rant over. * I was single for the entirety of my non-college school years, and despite that, decided I was bisexual. This is due to the attraction I felt to both males and females, and having loved a woman and liked a man at the same time. Despite my lack of experience at the time, I

felt this was enough. I was recently in a wonderful relationship with a great guy, and my sister said, "Ariel, you can't like girls anymore. You have a boyfriend now. That means you're straight." Face, meet palm. She seems not to understand the meaning of '''bi'''sexual. * Not only DanSavage, but one of my high school acquaintances (I refuse to describe anyone from back at that hellhole a "friend") argue that whilst women can be bi, men cannot. Maybe the politicization of sexual orientation debates has made people think in a WithUsOrAgainstUs manner? As for me, I think [[EveryoneIsBi Kinsey Was Right]] about the subject. ** Dan Savage seems to acknowledge the existence of male bisexuality these days - although he still spews lots of other biphobic bullshit. * [[Tropers/RedWren I]] isaman, and once had a conversation that went like this: -->'''Generally Polite Girl''' [speaking to her and group]: [Rude joke about bisexuals.]\\ <Group Laughter>\\ '''Tropers/RedWren''' [stunned and insulted]: I'm bisexual.\\ '''GPG''': Really? Have you ever been with a girl?\\ '''Tropers/RedWren''': No, and I've never been with a guy either...\\ '''GPG''': [considering glance] I think you're straight, and once you get with a girl you'll realize it.\\ '''Tropers/RedWren''': [[[BeatPanel stare]]]\\ '''GPG''' [suddenly mortified]: Oh, you're not gay, are you! ::So apparently it was okay to call me straight if I'm bi, but not if I'm gay. [[SarcasmMode I mean, goodness. I might get offended.]] * I have been told countless times that bisexuals don't exist. I am bisexual - not bi-curious, and definitely not confused. I have kissed enough girls and guys to know that I am attracted to both. (Actually, I figured this out when I was in grade school, but thought it was weird and that I would "grow out of it". I haven't.) I have been told this by my friends, and by random classmates (when the debate about sexuality somehow became a discussion in class). I am attracted to guys, but I'm attracted to girls more... And my parents, when I came out to them recently, insisted (and still do) that I am gay. It drives me absolutely crazy - to the point where I do not bring up the subject of boyfriends/girlfriends with my parents. Thankfully, though, it has been getting better recently. My parents are at least willing to listen to me on the subject (if they ask). Although, it might explain why I've never really cared too much about having a boyfriend... * My girlfriend often makes this assertion. Funnily enough, I was more or less out when we started going out, and her previous boyfriend was out as bi as well (in that particular broad social circle only about 30% of men are straight). However, given that she is as emphatic about her sexuality as a Baptist preacher, there is some doubt about whether she really believes this, or if she is actually trying to convince herself. * I fear I may have rushed into declaring herself a lesbian because of this trope. I'ms most obviously attracted to females, but has some lingering attraction to males. "Bi" has the poor connotations of not being able to hold down a relationship and just overall being a flirt. I, over the course of a year, went from straight, to straight with a

crush on a girl, to bi, and then very swiftly to homosexual. I myself doesn't know if bisexuality exists or not, only that it'd be so much easier if it weren't for the stereotype pressuring me to figure out one way or the other. * I had a math teacher back in 11th grade who believed that bisexuality was only an excuse for men to cheat on their wives with men. I know this since he decided to rant about it in class one day (as opposed to his more normal off-topic rants about football and pork, but that is another trope). No surprise, I walked out of class. Said teacher tried to complain to the assistant principal about it, but after asking me for my side of the story, the assistant principal just gave the teacher a blank look and told him to stay on topic while teaching class. I was later moved to another math class. * I have one friend who insists for whatever reason that bisexuality is just a stage and that all those who identify as "bisexual" are gonna turn out gay. Particularly annoying, especially since a bisexual friend was there when she went on a tirade about it, said friend knows perfectly well that I have a crush on another friend who's bi...and said friend is the one who's giving me doubts that I'm straight. * I also applied this trope to a friend she knows. She has relationships with both so naturally should be "Bi" sexual. I still call her a lesbian though. * My sister in-law is like this, to the point that she keeps calling me a lesbian. * I suspect this trope is the reason why it took me so long to figure out I'm bisexual. I have never denied that bisexuality exists, (and I have several bisexual friends), but I believed that I was straight for more than eighteen years, because as soon as some part of me started wondering if maybe I was attracted to girls, another part of me started going off about the fact that I was more attracted to guys. It was strange, because while I rationally recognized bisexuality as a sexual orientation and accepted it in others, I irrationally refused to accept/acknowledge it in myself. When it finally hit me that I've had almost as many crushes on girls that haven't lead to anything as I've had crushes on guys that haven't lead to anything and that that's perfectly okay... [[FacePalm *facepalm*]] * I am a bisexual woman... who generally doesn't tell anyone, regardless of their gender, because I just doesn't want to deal with all the unwanted attention and assumptions that go with it. Straight men assume it means I'm some wild child who's into threesomes and/or they can watch me have sex with a woman (um, NO); lesbians (and even some GAY MEN!) assume it means I'm just some slutty toy for straight guys -- even though, in most respects, I'm practically a nun. There are probably quite a few others like me who just keep quiet about it and let people think what they want. * [[PlatonicLifePartners My friend and I]] are both gay, and said friend does not believe in bisexuality. Yet he recently revealed that his boyfriend has had full-on sex with women in the past, but insists that he's 100% gay, just "easily turned on". I'm skeptical, as I could never go anywhere near [[UnusualEuphemism rhubarb crumble.]] * [[Tropers/{{Trkzsoup}} I]], who am bisexual and basically out to everyone but her grandparents, only encountered this with my father

and brother. The former, before knowing that I have any interest in girls as well as guys, expressed on multiple occasions that he was okay with people being straight or gay, and understands that it's not a choice, but thought that bisexual people just couldn't choose, or wanted attention. I had to very gently explain that I'm 'bi-flexible' (which was a much easier way to say that I just barely lean hetero). To my dad's credit, he took it really well, even though he openly claims he doesn't understand how someone can be attracted to men and women. ** My brother, on the other hand, still doesn't quite grasp that I'm bisexual. Even though I routinely express interest in both men and women on television, I've had to reaffirm for him that, no, I'm not a lesbian, and yes, I do like men. It never seems to occur to him that bisexuality is an option. Thank god my friends were more perceptive than him. * "I'll believe you're bisexual once you've banged a girl. Until then, you're gay." - Dude I know. After this, I wouldn't dare call him a "friend". * I had a little argument with my brother about this. He kept insisting that if you liked people of the same gender, then you were gay, even if you liked those of the opposite gender, therefore, gay and bi are the same. No matter how many times I told him that is contradictory, he stood his ground. * A subset of this trope resulted in my having to explain once that asking if someone has a boyfriend(s), girlfriend(s), or both is not because one is of the opinion that bisexuality means a roar rampage of sex but to include also those that have non-monogamous relations along side varied sexualities. * Frowny face! Hate it when this happens. One of [[{{Tropers/Pendulum}} my]] older sisters disowned me after finding out about the RomanticTwoGirlFriendship at the time, saying that girls (especially other bisexual girls) tend to be very cruel and manipulative when it came to commitment and romance. I asked her how she could possibly have known about such a thing, since the sister is hetero, married, and has 2 kids. Sister blushes very deeply, and walks away without another word. * My...erm...fuck buddy is bisexual. Although he says that I am a case of IfItsYouItsOkay and he mostly dates girls (oddly enough, all of his former girlfriends ID'ed as ''lesbian''), the [[IfYouKnowWhatIMean strong]] reaction to gay porn as well as straight and lesbian porn says otherwise. Oddly, because of this trope, I ''prefer'' bisexual men, because they tend to be more accommodating of [[{{Transsexual}} my situation]], as well as appreciating my being a YuriFanboy and ''not'' thinking that HetIsEw, unlike a lot of gay-ID'ed men he's met. Though I'm never going to tell my mother, because she's convinced that "bisexual" is a code word for "[[AnythingThatMoves disease-ridden whore]]". * I have never met a true Bisexual. Every single one so far has been a promiscuous (ie: has lots of casual sex) person who only dates the opposite sex but occassionally has sex with the same sex. That is not a bisexual, though its definitely not straight. I think we should have a new word so that one describes people who date and have sex with the

same sex (which is what bisexual should mean) and those who are mostly straight, but still make out or masturbate or have sex with members of the opposite sex (not straight, but not truly bisexual). ** Technically, if they're sexually-attracted to both sexes they ''are'' bisexual. They may not be biromantic, which is when you desire ''relationships'' with both sexes. But if the sexy feelings are there for both, then they're bisexual. You don't need to be 50/50 to be bi; it's actually relatively rare, in fact. Also there ''are'' times for what you describe - "bicurious" and "heteroflexible." There's also the Kinsey scale, which measures your degree of heterosexuality vs. homosexuality, with 0 being completely straight and 6 being completely gay. Your friends sound like they fall in at 1 or 2. * I know a lot of bisexual girls on dating sites identify as gay, because they a) are mainly on there to meet women (since, with 90-some percent of the population being heterosexual, it's much easier to find a straight person to date than a gay or bi person IRL), and b) because of all the unwanted attention they get from certain (mainly) straight men who think "bisexual" means "kinky" or "looking for a threesome" (newsflash: just because someone is attracted to both sexes doesn't mean they want them both at the same time). It varies, though, in how helpful it is, considering that even a lot of lesbians get harassed on these sites by the same dudes, who think that women who don't want penis just haven't met the right one. This bi girl perseveres because she doesn't want to rule men out, but more importantly, because she's proud of her identity and it's easy enough to keep the slobbering Neanderthals at bay anyway. ** Listing yourself as a lesbian when a bi female has some definite problems if believing in NoBisexuals is a definite turnoff to you--and there's unfortunately just as many lesbians who think bisexual women are either lesbians-in-denial or straight women out to experiment as there are gay men who believe the same about bisexual men. *** Exactly. And that's why I don't do it, personally. It seems like "listing yourself as gay when you're really bi" has become less common these days, anyway, since Okcupid introduced a feature for gay/bi users where they can block all straight people from viewing their pages. * I have noticed that most of my friends from high school, during a really boy-crazy phase (and while still identifying as hetero), think I'm lying about being bi because I'm straight. Most of my college friends, who know me as mostly being cynical and dismissive about boys, and fitting a lot of lesbian stereotypes (ardent feminist, women's studies minor, don't care much about clothes or make-up compared to most girls at my school), think I'm lying about being bi because I'm gay. And both groups are equally adamant and convinced. I kind of want to get both of them together and say "Hey, guys, you can't both be right about this!" Maybe if they each listen to the other for a while they'll realize they're both wrong? * I identify as bi because, while I'm not exactly attracted to anybody in particular for longer than a split second, he only finds men and women attractive. Nevertheless, I've run into this problem once or twice. My sister-in-law, while [[CoolBigSis smoking a joint with me after her son blew me off to hang out with other friends]], got

frustrated when I mentioned my sexuality to her and said "Oh [Troper], how the hell would you know what you are? You haven't even had sex with a woman yet!" I calmly explained to her that, despite that being true, I masturbate to women as well as men. I also explained that I've had sex with men in the past(who are a ''LOT'' easier to talk into sex, ladies. Hint hint.) She didn't respond to my counter-argument, just rolled up another joint for us to smoke. She's the best sisterin-law ever! * I am bi, but most of my friends find it hard to wrap their heads around it. Multiple occasions they had refer to me as gay. Why? Because I don't voice any attraction towards men OR women, so automatically I must be gay. Their logic is infallible. (sarcasm, in case you didn't catch it) Meanwhile my best friend is bisexual too, but he's a guy. Most people who've been told that he's bi still think he's gay and that he's just in the closet. Really people? * I spent most of my life assuming I was very gay. As it turns out, I was also very wrong. I still very much prefer men, and will never go out of my way to [[IfYouKnowWhatIMean kaddodle a girls shadoodle]], but I'm not entirely opposed to the idea. * I found myself really annoyed at Baltimore Pride by a girl wearing a shirt that said "Bi Now, Gay Later." It was exactly these sorts of attitudes - that bisexuality was either a phase for straight girls who wanted to seem "adventurous" to men, or a phase in coming-out for gays and lesbians - that kept me in the closet throughout middle and high school. I have also noticed that while most people I know believe bi girls there are a lot of people I know who insist that men can't be bi thanks to the stupid studies mentioned in the "Real Life" section of this article. And even a lot of bi women are usually second-guessed as being one or the other. * If I had a nickel for every time someone told me that I was confused due to my bisexuality, I'd be living next door to Bill Gates and shooting golf balls into his yard. My usual and often crude response is "Men turn me on, women turn me on. What's there to be confused about?" * I found out last night that my mum is one of these people who doesn't believe in bisexuals.. right after I came out to her as bisexual. ---Return to NoBisexuals, or don't. There is no in-between. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NobleDemon Do not put yourself into this entry. ---* This troper knew a ([[HeelFaceTurn now ex-]]) gang member who was a ''very'' [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel intimidating guy]]. However, he [[NeverHurtAnInnocent refused to seriously harm civilians]] or [[WouldntHurtAChild children]], and [[EvenEvilHasStandards was often disgusted by the particularly bad actions of members of other gangs]]

([[RapeIsASpecialKindOfEvil rape]], [[PoliticallyIncorrectVillain hate crimes]], [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking parking in handicapped spaces]], etc.) ---Grab your best spiky armor and evil cape, and go back to NobleDemon. Just do mind you don't accidentally skewer anyone with the spikes; not that you care, it would just be a pain to wash the cape. And ignore those [[TroperTales/CardCarryingVillain more depraved fools elsewhere on the wiki]]; remember, EvenEvilHasStandards. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NoblewomansLaugh * This troper did a Naga cosplay in 2007. She trained long to do the laugh with the proper ear-bursting, old lady-scaring effect. It worked. ** You owe me a Yoo-Hoo. * This troper frightens her parents with this. * This (male) troper used to be able to do it, back when I was an adolescent and my voice was still trying to decide where it'd end up. It always freaked people out; sadly, my voicebox has lost flexibility since then. ---Mwahahaha! Mine is [[strike:an evil]] a NoblewomansLaugh! ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NobodyButMeCanKeepThisHeapRunning * This troper's friend had a car that was permanently stuck in 1st gear, and the battery would die completely if it sat for more than 3 hours. It was strange to have to ''plan'' to find somebody to jump it, but I bet it would have frustrated would-be car thieves. * This troper owned (past tense, unfortunately) an [[TheAllegedCar alleged Bronco]]. His friends never understood why he locked it, since even if a thief somehow managed to start it, they would likely crash; the only way to go streight was to cant the steering wheel about forty-five degrees (rendering the right turn signal impossible to engage) and hold on ''tight,'' since the truck itself was bound and determined to turn right. Also, while we never worked out where the smoke was coming from, there was a theory that activating the air conditioning would set the engine on fire. I never worked up the courage to try and find out. * Sounds a lot like my computers. Rarely are any components any newer than three years; they all run outdated or eccentric operating systems, and yet I ''still'' seem to get better functionality and reliability out of them than most people can get with the latest machines. Go figure. * My sister's former car (now mine) [[DoesNotLikeMen is a misandrist]]. We know this because it will only run when a woman is

driving it. A man can't even get it to start. We have never figured out why this is. *My computer. Unless I specifically start it up, and do most of the input, and keep a fan on it with me in the way; It WILL NOT WORK!!! * Many jobs ago, I gave my notice. The servers rebooted every halfhour for two weeks after my departure due to lack of daily maintenance. The company's since gone bankrupt. ---The Admins can access the main wiki database just by angling their screen just so and giving it a tap on the left but you can [[NobodyButMeCanKeepThisHeapRunning click on this link]]. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NobodyEverComplainedBefore * While working with the government [[Tropers/FuzzyBoots I]] was working with a piece of software that periodically returned completely wrong results. Naturally, after tracking down the circumstances that caused the error and likely ways to fix it, we submitted a report to the manufacturer and asked them to fix it. Their response? "We've never had this problem with people who don't use our software." It turns out that out of all of their customers, we were the only people who had reported using that aspect of the functionality of the software.

NoControlGroup *Troper Tale: At my last job, at a British public sector organisation which has been in the news a lot lately, ''every'' section was required to suggest and act on a different improvement strategy despite a highly varying workload and frequent changes in our working practices. When I suggested that we make ''no'' changes and act as the control group, my manager said this was unnecessary. I then told him that I would inform the medical and scientific community that they'd been getting it wrong these many years. Surprisingly, he had no answer for this. ** If this is the organisation to which this editor thinks this entry refers, he's not surprised in the least, having worked there himself. * And now for something completely stupid: [[PomRania This troper]] does what she calls "experiments", which are really just doing random/stupid things to see what happens, such as dropping a grapefruit in a shoe (using my sock as insulation) off a flight of stairs to see what happens. (If you're curious, the grapefruit cracked, and I got a sticky sock.) The "control group" the next day consisted of dropping an unwrapped grapefruit off of the same stairs (it didn't crack); it was more an excuse to drop things off of heights than any attempt at scientific accuracy. ** Your sample size was dreadful in any case :P

<<|TroperTales|>>

NoExceptYes * This happens in my family quite a lot. Things aren't ''lost'', they're just 'temporarily misplaced'. ''People'' aren't lost either, they're just 'not quite sure of our present location, in relation to where we want to be'. Saying that something wasn't ''broken'', it was just 'in a state of disrepair' may have been taking it a bit far, though... ---No, [[NoExceptYes this link]] won't take you back to the main articlejust a page that explains the trope and gives examples of it in fiction... ----

NoGuyWantsToBeChased * This female troper once asked a guy out and got an explanation of this trope in response. My answer to him? "You're just a pussy." * I used to play it straight, though that was really just with one girl. To be fair, I was in ''sixth grade''... looking back, not only at how she was acting back then, and seeing how attractive she is after not seeing her in four years (we went to different high schools), I pretty much have reversed on this and would like to DopeSlap my past self. * I once attempted to invoke this on a guy, whom I wanted to leave me alone. [[GoneHorriblyWrong It]] [[TooDumbToFool backfired]]. * Played Straight... almost Exaggerated, with this Troper. Even Played For Drama a bit. I know a girl who claims she's totally in love with me, and wants to date me, and practically wants me all to herself. Of course, I do NOT feel the same way. She's cute and all, but she's just my friend. She was '''NOT''' okay with me saying no to her. She's... [[IGotBetter gotten better]] now though... I hope... I haven't talked to her in a while anyway. ---Don't follow me back to NoGuyWantsToBeChased. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NoIndoorVoice Everybody knows someone who has only one volume. Some of us ''are'' that person. Describe your interesting experiences here. ---* This troper has actually measured his default speaking voice with a decibel meter. The result: an average of 90db from 5 feet away. To put that into perspective, I am by default louder than the average blender. That's about 8 times louder than the average conversation. Screaming at the top of my lungs once resulted in someone

approximately 80 yards away, and off to the side of where I was yelling, falling off of their chair in shock. * This Troper and his entire family are loud which gets on the nerves of everyone in my school when they have to remind me that I'm sitting right next to them and that they can hear me fine. * [[LadyDemonique This Troper]] definitely has it, along with LargeHam. Which makes it strange for those newly-acquainted because I am rather standoffish around strangers. Close friends and family, however, know to stand at least 3 feet away from me when I start talking (both for volume and for the stray hand(s)/foot(feet) that may shoot out without warning). I blame it on my massive lung capacity, which allows me to deliver public speeches and debates even with faulty sound systems. * [[TromboneChild This Troper]], most definitely. I come from a loud family. We see my mother's family once or twice a month on average, and since she has twelve siblings, all of whom have spouses and offspring and at least half of whom will show up at any given time, over the years, I've become accustomed to speaking very loudly to be heard. Also, I play the trombone, so I have developed a large lung capacity, which makes it easier to be loud. My mother will often say, "Turn off the trombone voice," but it's really hard for me to do so. * My brother and I are like this. ** You get it from YourMom. Trust me... ''I know.'' *** [[http://classicfun.ws/wp-content/uploads/internet-high-fiveplace-hand-here-right-480x444.jpg YES!]] * My sister has only gotten worse over the years, to the point where I will need to shush her when she's standing 5 feet away from me in a relatively quiet room. This and how loud she insists on turning up the TV have lead me to conclude that she is suffering from progressive hearing loss and just doesn't notice. * This troper had a dorm-mate who didn't have an indoor voice ''for anything''. And would often get phone calls at horrible-o'-clock. This troper once vocally threatened to remove her vocal chords if she didn't STFU already. * [[{{Gobolt}} This troper]] 'suffers' from this, much to the embarassment of his friends (we sometimes talk/gossip-ish of other people, and half the time, my friends will spot the person in question nearby, and [[FailedASpotCheck I won't]], and my voice is... loud). My dad does, too. Hooray. * [[{{Haza}} This troper]] has two friends who suffer from this. They will talk to each other in a volume that makes you want to gouge out your eardrums with something really sharp. And neither of them will notice it until you point it out to them, not even when they're speaking ''to each other''. * This troper can't help doing talking loud and finds it quite frustrating. It's especially a pain when I need to be quiet, because I will start out talking in a low voice and then I'll forget and revert to normal volume. It's even worse when I'm drunk. * Inverted by a gent this troper knew: The guy had no ''outdoor'' voice, and his indoor voice was so soft I could barely hear him. ** He sounds a bit like [[IronScope me]]. (I also throw TheUnintelligible, SpockSpeak, SesquipedalianLoquaciousness, and

SophisticatedAsHell into the melting pot. [[ItGotWorse AND]] a BerserkButton about people asking me too many questions. [[OverlyLongGag I also have a borderline case of]] HairTriggerTemper. Conversation with me [[{{Understatement}} can be a touch risky]]. For both parties.) * [[Tropers/CabbitGirlEmi This tropette]] lacks an indoor voice sometimes, and I can't seem to help it. * This troper who is also a Large Ham by nature is famous for this. So much so that he got cast as Gaston in his company's production of Beauty and the beast. His performance blew everyone away. Several Crowning Moments of Awesome and Funny happened on and off stage. He stayed in character throughout rehearsals and thanks to some method acting almost became the character of Gaston. -->'''Casting Director:''' You've got the part of Gaston. How good are you at acting?\\ '''Troper:''' ''(very loudly)'' I'M GRRRRRRRRRRRRREAT!\\ '''Casting Director:''' You'll need to be as boastful and arrogant as possible. Can you do that?\\ '''Troper:''' Sure. No problem.\\ '''Casting Director:''' Very good, now say it in a more Gaston-like manner. Be a bit more boastful.\\ '''Troper:''' ''(as Gaston)'' No one boasts like Gaston!\\ '''Casting Director:''' ''(very loudly)'' THAT! WAS FANTASTIC! ** This troper swears he has seen this example several times already. * When This Tropette was younger, she always wondered why her throat was so sore all the time. She recently watched a video of herself at age 4, and is astounded at how bull-horny her voice was. * This troper thought his Jurisprudence professor was a LargeHam at first, but it's mostly just this. Even though the man's lecturing into a microphone ''and'' (since it's a small class) no one is sitting near the back of the room, he's still more than twice as loud as any other lecturer around. And he keeps it up for the full 75-minutes class period, without fail. * [[RayAyanami This troper]] takes shame in his voice; he has a bad habit of shouting without even trying. It led to a DethroningMomentOfSuck shortly after he got his braces removed and his orthodontist's assistant kept admonishing him for "shouting" when he's ''trying to lower his voice.'' * This troper's director in her theater company is not only an overly dramatic gay man who is begging to ChewTheScenery, he literally has ''no indoor voice''. He is the loudest person I've ever met, and he has the temper to prove it. * A woman who works with ThisTroper has no indoor voice, and on top of it has a voice that is about two registers higher than normal. It's the kind of voice that would casually rip through Batman's mental shields. She works two cubes down from this troper. Gyuh. * My best friend has this problem. I still remember back when we were kids and he would sleep over, we'd be talking late at night and half the conversation would be me reminding him to whisper so as not to wake up everyone in the whole house. It has only gotten worse with puberty, but at least we mostly hang out in the daytime now. * One of this troper's friends has no control over the volume of her

voice whatsoever. Right after we shush her, she's quiet enough, but then she quickly gets back up to her normal (read: REALLY GODDAMN LOUD) volume without even noticing. * MY FRIEND STEPHEN IS THIS. people always tell him to"STOP YELLING!" * My mother. Dear lord, every other word I must scream "Volume control" in her ear. Then she goes on in a deafening volume, again. I have ringing in both ears. Of course, now I talk to her with headphones on, which makes it better. * This troper is guilty. She is one of those people with only two volumes: whisper under breath (rarely used) and shout at top of lungs (default setting). * [[TheTallOne This Tropette]] was giving a friend a pep talk before the friend gave a speech. My final words of advice "...And always remember, if you can't be right, be loud." I always follow my own advice. * This troper has a co-worker who seems to have a stuck caps-lock key... but when quizzed, will claim that this *is* her indoor voice. Later observation proved that her *real* outdoor voice can be heard across a large parking lot. * This Troper has a friend with ADHD. He's a nice guy who like to yell and curse about artillery pieces. [[ItGotWorse When all my friends gather, then things get intense.]] * This troper deals with numerous customers who insist on ordering their drinks using voices that rival megaphone levels...six inches from his face. * I have a bit of this. I have a fairly loud voice (my parents often 'shush' me) but not so loud it's annoying. Or so I'd hope. * RobinZimm is often told to modulate his voice a little better. * THIS TROPER IS PRONE TO IT, MOSTLY TO BE ANNOYING. He can speak normally, BUT WHERE'S THE FUN IN THAT? * This troper recently had brake work done on her car. Good service, but the counter guy conducted all conversation pretty much at the top of his lungs (not helpful to a customer who had a headache that day to begin with). Troper and husband concluded that the counter guy was simply so accustomed to having to be heard in a noisy garage he'd lost his lower volume settings. Troper's husband works in a factory and has developed a similar problem (definitely not due to hearing loss). * This troper sits next to this boy in geometry who A) is constantly talking, B) Talks very loudly, and C) has the LOUDEST, MOST SHRILL LAUGH IN THE UNIVERSE! * This troper alternates between being (from his friends' perspectives) a silent BadAss and a loud LargeHam who can out-enthuse pretty much anyone [[MemeticMutation IN A CAVE! With a box of SCRAPS!]] * No matter how hard I try, I seem to be yelling. I once whispered to my friend that I had a crush on a girl in the class. Said girl, thinking she heard her name, turned and asked "What?". I freakin blushed like crazy, thanking God I wasn't facing her. My friend saved me by telling her it was nothing. * This trouper. My mother always complains that I speak too loudly. It also doesn't help when you're often around uncles who speak in loud, booming voices.

** Or a mother and four siblings who are all equally loud. This lack of an indoor voice occasionally leads to the following: --> Troper:'''CUTE SCIENCE TECHNICIAN AT 12 O'CLOCK!'''\\ Death to all eardrums and bemused look from Cute Science Technician\\ Normal Person: Indoor voice...\\ Troper: SORRY, CUTE SCIENCE TECHNICIAN AT 12 O'CLOCK.\\ Horrible embarrassment for all but the human foghorn. * [[SacredSturgeon This Troper]]'s brother, oh dear dark gods of evil, this Troper's brother. If I had a penny every time me or one of my parents informed him in vain that we're right next to him and can hear him perfectly fine, I'd be the richest man in Europe. It doesn't help that he very rarely actually has anything good to say. Arguments with him are, to put it lightly, [[{{Understatement}} not fun]]. * [[{{Apostledanub}} This troper]]'s former English teacher had no indoor voice when he was younger, or so I've heard. Even now though, despite his rather advanced age, he can still startle the shit out of you when he does his best. When he does, I'm sure that he reaches the amount of decibels the average aeroplane makes. I shit you not. * This troper and her cousin are frequently told that we have [[NoIndoorVoice no indoor voices]]. * This troper actually began taking voice lessons and got in to acting because of this. A couple examples have been (repeated so many times during my life) "Use your inside voice!" "I thought this was my inside voice!" and (at Restaurant A) "Restaurant B is so much better than Restaurant A, don't you think?! I mean, they're so friendly there!" "Dude, they can hear you all the way over there! Shut up!" * This Troper's friend is like this. And so is said friend's family. Get them together, and they are loud. Catch them in even a mild argument, and the entire Earth shakes. The odd thing is, most of the time when the guy laughs, he just kind of shakes quietly, not making much noise. Except when he suddenly lets out a loud "HA!" * This troper has often been admonished by classmates that people halfway across the lecture hall can hear him. And this troper doesn't care. Piss him off enough, and he'll stop speaking in his normal voice, and shout obscenities at you. His classmates have started to lampshade this by muttering "I think I've just gone deaf." * This troper and her roommate are both this way, although we're less of the 'one loud voice' variety and more of the 'consistently rising loudness' kind. We're used to it, as most of our friends from high school are loud like us (particularly the theater kids), but anyone new we met at college that weren't already loud had to adjust. Being drunk doesn't help us, either; we both get louder and try to talk over each other. * This Troper is only this on stage, although he has a habit of breaking out his stage voice to stress a point in an argument. Generally, people are more amazed that I actually can yell to tell me to be more quiet. ** Played completely straight when I sing, as I am generally told at least once every choir practice to sing quieter. BY THE OTHER BASSES! In plainer English, I sing so loud that I'm told to sing quieter by the loudest choir section, ever though I'm part of it. * This troper has a very loud speaking voice, which comes from doing

years of amateur drama work. My family has to tell me to shut up a lot. * My brother's friend is like this. Since my hearing is really good (to make up for my horrible sight) I can already hear what other people are saying in other rooms, but when he's around it's as if he's in the same freaking room as me at all times. What makes it worse is that my brother likes to join in on this and the two of them start yelling for no reason. * [[Tropers/ThirtyTwoFootsteps This troper]] has spent years learning how to use an indoor voice, because he has both a naturally loud voice and good reverb on his voice. For the most part, he's succeeded. However, when he gets excited, he gets distinctly louder. And if he has a reflex reaction (namely, a cough, sneeze, or hiccup) with a vocal component, it will be heard from an extremely long distance. * This troper didn't know until age 12 or so that if you try to talk while wearing headphones you can't really modulate the volume of your voice. I accidentally woke up my best friend's parents at a sleepover singing along to a song on the radio. * [[{{Tropers/Ventisia}} This Troper]] has always been known as a loudmouth, especially when I'm around my friends. Funnily enough, my parents tell me to quit mumbling, though... * This tropette's sister had a friend who had two volumes: Loud and Ithink-they-just-went-deaf-in-AUSTRALIA! His mother was blind so he used that as his excuse to being so loud. I realized what he said and said,"His mom is blind, not deaf." * My elementary-grade teacher seriously believed (and even stated as such) that his students pay more attention if he speaks loudly, because they hear more that way. We just got very good at tuning him out. When he was on sick leave (after some throat surgery - yes, ''I know'') we had a substitute who did the opposite - he spoke softly so you actually had to pay attention to hear him. '''Cell Phones Examples:''' * [[{{Argetlahm}} This guy's]] dad can't seem to modulate his voice when speaking on the phone. Any phone. It's constantly turned up like Spinal Tap's [[UpToEleven guitar amplifiers]]. Acceptable when speaking outside, not so much ''while I'm driving my car...'' * This troper had a neighbor who frequently held these loud cell-phone conversations in the apartment complex courtyard... at three A.M. ** Did you try stabbing her in the ear drums? At least then she'd have a reason to yell... * This troper and her brother have become conditioned to automatically turn the volume of our cellphones down when our mother calls, at the risk of anyone in a six foot radius hearing the entire conversation. * This normally quiet troper can't help BEING LOUD WHILE ON THE PHONE! Which is annoying because my Mum is unbelievably loud and irritating on the phone as well and I'd like to be as little like her as possible, thank you. * This troper once got in trouble for having the TV turned up too loudly because his dad was in the same room talking very loud on the phone. Every time I'd turn the volume up, he'd talk louder. * I do this pretty much whenever I'm in the school library. I pretty

much yelled for someone from across the hall. I'm still surprised I didn't get told off. * While not as severe as some others, this troper still talks louder than most people like * This troper is always yelling on the phone for some reason. Yeah. I don't know. * A singer busking on the S-bahn in Berlin seemed to have been operatically trained. At any rate his voice was far too loud for the train. * Subverted in one conversation this troper had: -->'''Me:''' Use your indoor voice.\\ '''Other person:''' [+I have no indoor voice!+]\\ '''Me:''' Well just be quiet then. * I am now not allowed to give speeches while holding a microphone, announce something with a microphone, or try and have a privater conversation. This is due to my body percieving my voice softer than it is, along with percieving anything overly familar (favorite songs, other's voices, Billy May's ads...) softer. I tend to speak to loudly a lot. * This and That Male Troper: I can get like this at times, particularily if I get impassioned about something (it stems from a minor learning disability; personally, I think it adds to my charm). * [[PentiumMMX2 This troper]] was incapable of talking quietly when he was younger; not only did he talk loud, but he also wrote everything in all upper case letters. He grew out of this, thankfully. * This Troper's friend, along with that friend's immediate family. Can be quite embarrassing when they star having a very loud argument ''while guests are in the same room.'' * This Troper had a roommate in college that was like this and liked to skype with his friends at one in the morning when I was trying to get some sleep. * The ninth-grade history teacher at [[HappyDuck this troper's]] school has no indoor voice. HEY, THANKS FOR HOLDING THE DOOR! THAT WAS SO NICE OF YOU!! * To combat people doing this on the public transit buses that circulate our campus, this troper and her friends tend to pull out our own cell phones and begin talking loudly in more annoying/obnoxious voices. "WHAT?! NO, I'M ON THE BUS! WHAT?! NO, IT'S CRAP! NO, THERE'S SOME OTHER IDIOT TALKING REAL LOUD! WHAT?! NO, I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER! ALRIGHT, CIAO!" * This troper goes between this and mumbling so nobody can hear him. The latter is usually caused by me becoming self-consious of the former. * @/RainbowPoof : I'm like this, especially if I'm nervous. I try to keep it down, but for some reason I just can't do that. And somehow this results in me using entirely different voices depending on the situation without meaning to. With friends, I'm not that loud and have my normal voice; with people I don't know or people who intimidate me, I have to make a conscious effort to keep my volume down, and for some reason I speak in a higher, more feminine voice, as though I'm afraid they''ll forget I'm a girl if I'm not shouting... It's all very strange.

* This troper's father, to the former's chagrin. Combine this with beer at every meal, and you get an unintelligible no indoor voice. * I constantly have people shushing me. * This troper has very bad hearing, so she occationaly starts talking way too loudly. * My five year old brother has a very loud voice, that sounds sort of like Fred. It is very annoying. * My little bro is 15. He still has no indoor voice, in fact everything he does (eat, laugh, talk sneeze and walk) is Super loud. Me? You have to ask me what I've said over at least three times * This troper is convinced that at least half the population is inflicted with this malady. I don't understand people who are sitting two feet away from each other feeling the need to converse so loudly that they can be clearly heard and understood 50 feet away. I keep thinking, "why do you not care that a bunch of total strangers can hear your private conversation?" * [[Tropers/StongRadd This Troper]] says stuff out loud. [[{{Understatement}} The letters fall down]] and [[MadeOfExplodium blow up]]. * [[Tropers/BladeSatoshiX This Troper]] can have an indoor voice, but very rarely. Like once every season, if that. He shouts everything, including whispers, and the worst part? He doesn't know he's shouting. Also, he's scared a teacher before by his unintentional shouting. * This troper has one volume, which is talking really loudly. Very bad for my mom and sister, who both constantly get headaches. * This troper, lives VERY CLOSE to her Mother's side of the family. Said family is big, as in her mother's Mom is the oldest of 7 children. Four still live within a 20 mile radius of each other and get together once a week. This Troper learned from a early age if you wanted to be heard, you had to be LOUD. It made her a natural in theatre though * This troper in any Skype conversation or any game that allows voice chat on the PC. My sister usually barges in and yells at me to shut up, to which I usually respond with a deadpan "No." I LIKE MY NO INDOOR VOICE DAMMIT >:C * Apparently I'm like this. * I am normally soft-spoken, and when I'm not soft-spoken I'm usually quiet. Which means everybody's surprised when I reveal that I can open my mouth and shake whatever room I happen to be in with one huge Incoming Ham noise. Apparently people think I'm shouting... I'm just amplifying. I can get people's attention quite easily like this, using it on more than one occasion in a crowded room when a friend's shout simply did not suffice. "JORDAN!! He wants you. *thumb*" Cue silence from everyone in the enormous room for at least five seconds to look at the source of such a noise. My friend put it as having "vocal presence." I like that phrasing. :3 * I am this with things I care about. At one point, I got too exited with Mario Kart Wii, so my cousin said "Shh .. Use your Indoor Voice." To which I of course responded "I ''HAVE'' NO INDOOR VOICE!" ;) * My dad talks on like this on the phone constantly. And sometimes off the phone. No matter how many times we explain to him that the phone is held right against his mouth, he just can't help it. [[ItGotWorse

And it's hereditary...]] ---* GO BACK TO [[NoIndoorVoice NO INDOOR VOICE]] HERE!!!!! * I think I just went deaf in my right ear. * '''WHAT?! WHAT DID YOU SAY?!''' * '''[[HarveyBirdmanAttorneyAtLaw I'M SORRY I CAN'T HEAR YOU, I DON'T KNOW IF YOU NOTICED, BUT I'VE GOT JUST THE ONE EYE!]]''' ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NoInfantileAmnesia * This troper has some pre-5 years old memories from pre-school. What are they? Being the best person there at Sonic 2, better than middle schoolers who would wait there for their parents to pick them up. They'd always call me over for Chemical Plant Zone, as I was the only one who could beat it. * Well...some infantile amnesia. [[{{Mabus}} This Troper]] recalls a small number of events taking place prior to his sister's birth, which happened when he was two years old. All these memories are fragmentary, but some of them are clear, including a vivid sensory recollection of hiding beneath his mother's blue bathrobe while she was wearing it. * This troper remember quite a bit from my early childhood. He tends to remember things that are wither visually interesting or random. One thing he remembers is playing inside this giant, octopus-shaped, play... thing in galveston. He also remembers sleeping in the same bed as my future unrequited love interest. Last but not least, there is a memory of seeing dolphins and odd reptiles flying through the air in vast, multicolored displays of agility (took me till I was 15 and went back to seaworld to realize that it was a simple show, thought at the time I was freaked out). * This troper just has one single clear memory, of the view of the street at one moment through the window of the taxi in which I rode home from the hospital after my sister's birth. I was aged 18 months. No doubt that was the [[CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming exact moment at which I'd just been told I had a new sister]], because that single moment has been stamped indelibly on my memory ever since. * -raises hand- This Troper has lots of preschool memories from when I was three. I remember fragments of people's conversations from those memories, I remember the layout of my preschool in its entirely, I remember the colors of that building (furniture, toys, sandbox, bathroom, playroom, rec area) and most remarkably I remember the twins (my classmates; I only remember one of their names now) putting me in the baby carriage and letting me play the baby because I was the smallest. The reason I was the smallest was because ''I was two and a half years old''. * This troper has some early memories (she isn't sure of the exact age, but she knows it was before age four), some of them quite frightening or upsetting: for example, she recalls a thunderstorm that nearly flooded her house (her mother put towels at the doors to stop water from seeping under them, and luckily the water didn't rise any

higher), being forced to fingerpaint in pre-K (this troper has always hated getting her hands messy), her father laughing at her for crying after she forgot and drank from a straw that she'd kicked with her foot earlier (germophobia starts early, folks), and she can remember being asked if she'd rather take the polio vaccine by mouth or in a shot (this troper, [[AfraidOfNeedles naturally, chose to take it by mouth]], and remembers the nurse asking her mother if this was okay before handing over the little plastic cup of pinkish goop). In fact, strong emotions tend to be the key to setting memories that young, and since little kids tend to be cranky and irritable... * It's not wholly unsurprising that traumatic infantile memories often stick around to some degree, often resulting in phobias. In my case, phobias of spiders and a paranoid fear of bushfires (for example, getting nervous when a sunset is especially red) stem from incidents that occurred at the age of about two. Even if the memories themselves are not clear, the associations still remain strong years later. ** This Troper agrees - She has for as long as she can remember had a phobia of bees, and at some time after Pre-K was told this story: This Troper's family was moving into a new house, and all of the doors were open to facilitate the flow of air and furniture. This Troper was two at the time and, as babies do, needed to be changed. Unfortunately, a bee had entered along with the desired air and furniture and settled on the brightly-colored changing table. This Troper ended up laying on said bee while being changed, but as babies generally fuss during such a process this Troper's mother didn't notive until she picked me up and discover the wealt the bee had left on This Troper's neck. *** This tropette too. When she was about 15 months old, her family`s aging dog tried to bite off her leg. Needless to say, the dog was soon put down, but the fear remains. * This troper's mother claims that her earliest memory is from the age of six months: she tried to "fly" out of her mother's arms in an attempt to greet another grown-up she liked, and thus discovered gravity. She suspects that the shock of the event is why she still remembers it over half a century later. ** As for the troper herself, her earliest memory is at 22 months, on the day her newborn sister arrived home from the hospital. I remember meeting my sister, but the most vivid images from that day are from half an hour earlier, when I bumped my head while crawling around under a table. The memory stuck because I was so ''furious'' with myself for bumping my head; earlier, I had scoffed at my grandmother for warning me to be careful under there, reasoning, "it's not like I ''want'' to bump my head; of course I'm going to be careful!" * The farthest back this troper can remember was around the time they were starting to walk. They remember grabbing an egg and dropping it on the kitchen floor. And around the same time, there was the birth of their little sister, their house having a gas leak and having to move out, and going on vacation to the Bahamas, but out of all those things, they remember dropping an egg. This troper did have a bit of an obsession with eggs when they were little, but hated eating them, and still hates them to this day. Fucking eggs! * This troper remembers sticking his fingers in an electric socket before he was 1. Not quite pleasant. He also has some broken, but

quite vivid, memories of when he was 1 and 2, and, after starting school at 3, has quite a good recolection of events. * I have a few memories of when I was a little kid: a plastic dog getting too close to the fire and melting, sitting on the potty, not wanting to turn four, my first day of school, sitting reading a book (this was before I started school, but I started reading at three), drawing with chalk at my cousins house and being very proud of my drawing. * This troper's sister remembers that on her third birthday, her dad told her that as she was 3 now, she was a big girl and it was time behaving like a big girl. * Most of my memories come from age 4 and beyond, but I do have one memory earlier than that--I was sitting in a high chair (my parents tell me that I switched to a booster seat when I was halfway between ages two and three) watching my dad make dinner while my mom washed dishes. * aside from flashes of this toy or that, this troper remembers asking her father, " when will I be three?"( more like, "wen i be tree") probably around two and a half. * [[{{WTF Mate}} This troper]] distinctly remembers her younger brother's first birthday, when she was a little older than two herself. * I don't have much in the way of memories from before the age of four. Heck, everything from before the age of five is kinda sketchy. But I do remember standing on a radiator to greet my grandparents and laughing at how silly Grandpa was acting when he tried to guess what was different. No idea what anything else looked like, the memory seems to happen in a white void, but since the only place it could have happened was in one of the two apartments my parents lived in when they were first married, I had to be at most two at the time. There was also the distinct memory of the first time I was on a boat, which had that scratchy green outdoor carpet that I always thought was fake grass in it. And I was wearing a ridiculous sun bonnet and a huge life vest. And there were tables on a deck on the shore that had umbrellas sticking out of them, which I thought was just too weird. And I was wondering what would happen if the boat tipped over, I was sure the vest would hold me upside-down. When I told Mom about this memory she was in shock. As she put it, "You were two!" I also remember hating pre-K, though I was fascinated at how the town looked at night. (Why it was at night I will never know. Perhaps to be certain that at least one parent could come with. Though why the parents had to stay when they weren't allowed in the same room as their kids...) * This troper remembers walking home with her dad to her flat in Israel in the evening. This was when she was about one. She also remembers her first house in England when she was two-and-a-half-ish. Sadly, both memories are very, ''very'' fragmentary. * My earliest memory is my dog stealing my banana while I was sitting on the couch watching Winnie The Pooh one morning. We moved to a new house in August of 1994 (when I was 3 1/2) and this memory takes place in the old house, so I know it was before August, meaning I was 3 when it happened.

* This troper can remember from when he was 3 1/2 years old the first time he saw his new brother, which came with the distinctly clear thought that his head was far too big. * This editor has a few memories of St. Louis, where she lived until she was (3?) years old. Also remembers with surprising clarity getting her finger caught and broken in a closet door at the age of 2. * This troper remembers a balloon of a mouse and a paddle ball that were apparently at his first birthday, and birthday card at daycare/preschool when he turned three. * This troper can remember the ''exact'' moment he gained memory. He was four (which probably makes him an aversion). As he puts it to his therapist, it was like someone suddenly turning the lights on. ** I can relate to the description of having somebody "suddenly turning the lights on." I remember going from total darkness to napping on the floor of my preschool classroom when I was two and a half or three. * [[Tropers/{{Tabs}} I]] recall (vaguely) sitting in a comfortable chair, wearing a red string necklace with bagels. Two strange people were cooing at me, which was confusing and a little unsettling. Years later, when I told my parents about the "dream" I had, they pointed to an album of baby pictures, which had me sitting on a chair wearing a bagel necklace, looking puzzled. * This troper has a few fragmented memories of her father, who died when she was two and her grandfather, who died when she was three. * This Troper has an incredibly vivid memory from when she was three of her father carrying her after he picked up some take-out. It was dark, she was wearing a turtleneck and jumper dress, and the air smelled like grease from the take-out place. She doesn't remember what other food her father got, but there were definitely egg rolls. * Though not my birth, I can remember vividly the first time I ever played a video game, it was {{Sonic the hedgehog}} 2 and I was roughly a year and a half old. * This Troper's earliest memory is from the night before he turned three. I stood up on a chair and yelled "I'm Freeeeee!!!!!" (I couldn't pronounce the th sound yet). Then someone told me I wasn't three until the next day. * [[Tropers/PhantomDusclops92 This Troper]] remembers perfectly his first birthday. * This Troper can rememer being potty trained, and has it on good authority that she was fully trained by her first birthday, as well as being small enough to use a high chair. I once used our middle-sized dog as a step when I escaped my crib without hurting her. I also remember a famous moment in our family when my much-older sister wouldn't wake up to get breakfast for me and her year-old daughter, so I managed to get out our antique glass sugar bowl because that was all we could reach. My mom was at work at the time; she came home for lunch and found sugar all over the house. Thanks to the irregular ages in my family, I was only two at the time. * Currently, [[Tropers/LurkingBeneath this troper's]] earliest memory is of a caravan park my family and I were staying in when I was two and a half. I met another kid there, and we played "horsies" by drawing eyes on her gumboots and putting them upside-down on long

sticks. I have no idea why I remember this. * This troper's earliest memories are from when she was about two years old. Her memories from when she was three or four are quite vivid. Of course, lots of interesting stuff happened to her that year, so that probably helps. * I remember adamantly refusing to eat vegetable soup in preschool. And falling off the equipment a lot. * This troper recalls being around two years old, lying in a twin bed between her parents, and trying to '''"chew" on her mother's nails.''' My mom wasn't so excited about it, and kept pulling her hand away. Fortunately Dad let me do as I pleased. This was probably the start of a chronic nail-biting habit of mine. * This troper vividly remembers sitting on a bar stool in her family's kitchen in Florida, drinking Gatorade for the first time and pondering the meaning of life. At the time, she honestly felt like an adult- but her family left that apartment when she was three. ----

NoisyNature * This troper once played a game (I think it was of the movie Spirit the one about horses) where the eagle actually sounded like an eagle, and the animals generally didn't make sounds (except for that one eagle...); most of the soundtrack was humans doing stuff, userinterface clicks, and music. * A live show called "Twisted Flicks" is run by University of WA students. It involves the muting of the audio track to an old B-movie and the complete re-dubbing of the film live, with completely improvised dialog and vocalized SFX. During a scene from ''The Creature From the Black Lagoon'', the camera panned across the jungle surrounding the lagoon, and the performers began to make nature noises. They threw in absolutely everything they could think of, piling on random sounds until it was absolutely ''deafening''. This included things like monkeys howling, birds screeching, and dogs barking - and probably included nothing you'd ever actually hear in such a place. ** The response from one of the characters? [[CrowningMomentOfFunny "It's quiet.]] ''[[CrowningMomentOfFunny Too]]'' [[CrowningMomentOfFunny quiet.]]"

NoJustNo * When we were casting our new movie, I suggested we approach one of my friends for the part of the gay best friend. This was his first reaction. After going out to dinner with the producers and casting director, we got him to agree to take the part. * This is my real life reaction (usually preceded by a long pause and silent disturbed stare) to anything on the extreme end of squickiness for me. * Is there a "Let's just stop right there." page for all the conversations with my friends I have to cut short? * This was my response to a friend who decided that her imaginings of

Bill Kaulitz of Tokio Hotel belly dancing and pole dancing were turning me on. * "No. Just, no fucking way. No." is my response to any offer of watching a horror movie or suggestion that I should. * Recently, I came across someone (who he shall call "A")'s {{Facebook}} minifeed, which contained an [[strike:interesting]] chain of feed stories. A posts on my (female) friend (who I shall call "B")'s wall, then followed up with 2 stories about being horny. Their friends' reactions? Lulz. I thought to myself, "No. [[DudeNotFunny Not funny.]]" B's reaction? {{Squick}}. * I commonly gets this reaction from various people, generally when I'mis thinking aloud. * Got a friend who has a reputation for being a pervert in denial even though I managed to swipe proof from his hard drive while he wasn't looking. One day he and his apprentice in the depraved ways walk up to me as I'm reading Yotsuba& on my laptop. They both accused me of reading smut in school confusing the hell out of me. Cue my utter disgust in them when they told me they recognized the characters from a doujin they read. Cue my utter disgust when I realized that there were people who Rule 34'd Yotsuba& and that the two of them read and remembered it. My reaction at the realization was "Dear God, No! You sickos. What's wrong with you?! NO!!". * In a {{Pathfinder}} campaign in which [[Troper/ElodieHiras I]] play a wizard, my familiar, a small cat, found a huge monster with CombatTentacles. My partners joked about the fact that if he failed his stealth check, he would fall into it's tentacle. Having whatched too many anime, my reaction was: [[NaughtyTentacles No.]] [[{{Squick}} Just...]] [[BrainBleach No.]] ---Return to NoJustNo. Unless you really don't want to. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NomDeMom * Upon discovery that I was raised in a AreYouMyMummy situation, I chose to take my grandmother's maiden name instead of using either my mother's name or the name I was raised under. - {{Tropers/Sgamer82}}

NoMedicationForMe * Averted with this Troper. She has bipolar disorder, for which she takes lithium. She finds no problems with her "spark of life" or "necessary bit of crazy" for creativity being dulled by it. In fact, feels that the quality of her creative work has gotten *better* since she's taken the medication because it gives her the ability to *focus.* It helps to remember that medication for psychatric purposes, particualarly for hard-to-pin-down issues do have a different effect on every person. Just letting folks know that it is *not necessarily* a "creativity-killer" and can improve life for some of us.

* Played straight with this troper. However unlike most examples of this troper I only have ADD of which IGotBetter. And the reason that I did it because it stop working and it caused be to fell sick. * I continue taking my antidepressants because they keep me alive (and make it ''possible'', at least, for me to enjoy life). However my dentist says it's not a matter of ''whether'' I'll need false teeth, but '''when'''. I've already had nearly half my teeth extracted, and many of the remaining ones capped. My 75-year-old father has more (and better) teeth than I do. * This troper has non-hyperactive ADD and takes stimulants to counteract it. While this makes it much easier for her to complete a variety of tasks, it interferes with both her appetite and her sleep patterns, so she has to be very careful about when she takes her meds. Otherwise she merely becomes tired and cranky from low blood sugar/insomnia, which doesn't make concentrating any easier, and thus feels the need to medicate, giving the vicious cycle another spin. She therefore simply doesn't take it when she deems it unnecessary. * This troper finds that her medications for depression and ADHD interfere with her sleep cycles and creativity. In her case, it is a sacrifice worth making in order to function in society. The slightly reduced emotional range is also worth it if it means not wanting to do herself in. * This Troper broke his collar bone back in October, rather then call an ambulance, my friends talked me into "Manning" up and walking the 2000 yards to the ER, shuffling the entire way... THANK JESUS FOR ENDORPHINS. ** A subversion with [[{{@/Tidal_Wave_17}} this troper]] at first, he ''wanted'' to be this trope because he believes himself to greatly creative because of his [[=ADHDpI=]] and multiple other disorders. However, he knows that in order to achieve his life's goal, becoming a comic book writer/artist, he's going to have to make a sacrifice. * This troper has been on various medications nonstop for over a decade (since age ''8''). She has been sick of it for years now. Her parents and doctors never let her had a say in how she was medicated, so has tried getting off of it herself but always got caught eventually. It drives her nuts how they don't seem to realize there is something terribly wrong with this on several levels. She can't wait to see what she's really like when she finally gets off them (hopefully for good) this summer. * I used to get this, being fed up with taking my various different medications, which I've been doing since I was six. Taking them however, has allowed me function well enough that my lifes isn't a complete train-wreck, and can now deal being off them for weeks at a time without complete collapse, barring extreme stress situations.

NonIdenticalTwins * This troper was once involved with a production of ''The Comedy of Errors'' where we had two sets of "twins" who were actually similar in build and appearance. Then one of each set had to drop out. We ended up doing some cutting and lightning costume changes, and using a framing device of a child playing with large rag-doll puppets - which

we used for the scene where the twins meet face to face. (The girl playing the child walked in and out of every scene, moving props around and occasionally "pushing" the actors into place). ** It worked surprisingly well. * This (other) troper was involved in a different production of ''The Comedy of Errors'', where the two Dromios were played by one actor. (He had a vest that he would reverse when he switched from one to the other.) In the last scene, where the twins meet, we [[LampshadeHanging had a bit of fun with it]] by having one of the Dromios played by the only African-American member of our cast. * This troper once saw a production of ''Seven Brides for Seven Brothers'' where six of the brothers were white, and one was black. Not actually twins, of course, but still quite striking. * My friend's brothers are twins, and they are completely non identical and barely even look like brothers. One is really tall and ginger, and the other is short and thin with dark hair. ---Go back to NonIdenticalTwins. Goo back to NonIdenticalTwins.

NonNudeBathing * Several of the more modest students did this at [[TroperTales/FuzzyBoots my]] middle and high school for gym showers, showering with underwear on. The practice got banned at one point due to a set of soaked undergarments getting left in a locker over break leading to a huge mold infestation. * I did this once with a girlfriend to provide a naughty experience that still didn't transgress our personal boundaries.

NonPromotion My math teacher and Vice-Principal of my school got "promoted" to the secondary principal after the real principal got injuries with his back and retired a few months later. From that point on until now she has to do the whole job of a principal alongside her normal work as one of the few maths and physics teacher. She tried to get promoted, but this is only possible through a certain test which she has to pay for and doesnt get to know how many points are missing after it was over. The situation that we barely have her anymore in normal lessons and that she seems to get more insane from time to time makes her more of a Sympathetic Villain and seems to probably set up an Alas Poor Villain when I am graduating soon. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NonSequitur * [[Tropers/KatanaCat I]] once said, while my mom was helping me with a possible computer virus, something along the lines of "[[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial I was not just thinking of]] [[NoodleImplements something involving golf balls]]." [[HilarityEnsues

Then she started to laugh]]. ** Same Troper and her family have a habit of saying odd things to make sure people are listening. We used to change what we were talking about mid-sentence to something that often started with "And the aliens..." or some such, but it's gotten to the point where we always notice when someone says something about aliens, so now we have to be more creative... [[SelfDemonstratingArticle and the emus agreed with the pink flamingos that]] [[CrowningMomentOfFunny this was hilarious]]... --> And they were a dolphin and a... monkey made of... smoke... wearing a cowboy hat, respectively. --> And make sure you travel with your iguana. --> What is? ...The pandas? --> ...And soy milk, and hyena butts. *** Explanations: **** I was talking about characters I unlocked in a game I was playing, which were actually [[SonicRiders E-10000G and E-10000R]] (two robots unlocked by having total play time reach a certain (large) number of hours). **** Doesn't matter what Dad was talking about, because this was a COMPLETE non sequitur. **** In response to Dad saying "Well that's odd... " **** Last two things in a list of various items Dad was going to buy... the soy milk is normal, but the other... ** This Troper also made a DeviantART [[http://katana-thecat.deviantart.com/journal/39325379/ journal entry]] about a bizarre WikiWalk she took (with an UnusualEuphemism she sometimes uses for the title), but was tired at the time, and ended the entry with one of these to make sure people understood how tired she was while writing it. --> And I need to be heading to bed now. [[MemeticMutation Make sure you only]] [[Mondegreen get information from flatulent flies]] you trust! [[LampshadeHanging Wait what?]] * This troper and her [[TheStraightWillAndGrace best guy friend]] regularly have entirely non sequitur conversations to confuse people and amuse ourselves. It all started with him telling me his mayonnaise "is just like the french fry-- just imagine it's blue!" I told him that it smelled like crunchy nuns and everything went downhill from there... * [[{{Tropers/Dolphinz}} This troper]] was just browsing the good old internet when she heard her younger sister call out while playing the Wii, "No Kooshie [our cat], it's called cheese!" It probably [[ItMakesSenseInContext makes sense to her, but...]] ** Update from same troper: During her algebra class, she took the time to explain how to do a problem to a confused classmate. She then went back to her work, nonchalantly announcing "I like tacos." ** During an awkward silence, someone blurted out, "Somebody say something!" This elicited "toenails juice," "squirrels," and "fried democracy." * This troper and two of his friends have non sequitur conversations about: ** Beer and spinach trucks.

** Viking-Squids that poison people with exploding sugar. * This Tropers classmate JP says these all the time. ---> Me: Whats up? ---> JP: I wanna go to Wal-Mart. * This troper likes to invoke this when its too quiet around him. --->Everyone: (Is being silent for long time.) --->This Troper: I ''really'' like cats. --->Everyone: (Exhange weird looks, laugh, shrug it off, or coment back.) ---[[NonSequitur I like pandas]]. ----

NonSequiturThud * This Troper, last math class: "I love triangles." *falls asleep on desk* * [[Tropers.ReikoKazama This troper]] just posted the following on the GameFAQs Random Insanity social board, possibly confusing everyone there: [[HilarityEnsues "There are seven girls that I made in one of Doll Divine's latest game, the Fairy Tale Chick maker. Yasmina, Ebony, Vermillia, Ivory, Chloe and Marylinn xollext the tetet of others, which their mistress, Jezebelle, then mixes into a pofoio which, when rajeb, will allow them and anyone else who does to vtu until tht. Pictures are unable to be provided because uisephf ipWFB EWFBUPI, Bier bQWUI IBrqbipqwr."]] [[SugarWiki.FunnyMoments She then promptly fell asleep at the computer desk.]] ** [[PreviouslyOn Previously, on]] [[TroperTales.StepfordSmiler Troper Tales: Stepford Smiler]][[WantonCrueltyToTheCommonComma ,]] [[Tropers.ReikoKazama this troper]] [[AllBlueEntry posted]][[ColonCancer :]] --> One of [[Tropers.ReikoKazama this troper's]] [=OCs=] is a type A, even to the point where she. I made her on [[http://dolldivine.com/2emo.html this game here]]. Light blue eyes, [[YouGottaHaveBlueHair light blue hair]], ponytail out the side. Wears almost all blue clothes, even accessories. Grey or black where no blue is found. Light blue lipstick for no reason other than. Name is [[MeaningfulName Skye]]. Has no fandom, just came from my mind. Picturs undable ot be porviddded... [[NonSequiturThud *sleep*]] * This troper, when exceptionally overtired, once uttered the phrase "Words...have stopped making sense...in context...anymore...Rutabaga!" causing her mother to nearly asphyxiate laughing. * This troper found that, when denied sleep, his best friend tends to spout nonsense. The best has to be while playing Gears of War 2 online. "Get the grapefruit on the hairy bridge!" indeed. * This troper's best friend has been known to do this. Some of the highlights have been: "Matthew, you ate them ALL", "Leave the duck alone!", and "No, not the vampires!" Additionally, this troper's mother consistently chants, "Thirty-two and nineteen!" in her sleep. ** [[ParanoiaFuel =51]] * When this troper was little, according to her mum, she yelled "There's mushrooms in my hair!" upon being woken up. Also, one night

while camping in a trailer, I apparently walked into my dad's room, turned on the light and stood there holding my hand out saying "I've got.. I've got a..." then gave up and went back to my room without turning the light off. My stepsister has also told me of a few times she's heard me. Apparently I once sang in Japanese in my sleep, and I also said "I sleeeepy" in a kiddish voice. She also apparently saw me yell "No more mushrooms!" and flail my arms. Apparently there's a recurring mushroom theme, there... * ThisTroper was delirious with swine flew and got up and told her to deliver the box to the math people. When she didn't understand what I was going on a a bout I yelled "THE MATH PEOPLE". I the went back to sleep. ** That story is a NonSequitur in itself... * This troper enjots asking people's permission to lick them or bite off their noses. Normally they refuse. Then I poke them. Also, Banana Lobotomy. I enjoy saying strange things, usually to humorous result. If it doesn't work, I try again in an hour or so. * On the first morning of this [[Tropers/{{Colonial1.1}} troper's]] stay in Bangkok last summer, something odd happened, probably due to being jet-lagged out the arse from the LONG flight over. I remember very clearly being awakened by the cupboy of the guy I was staying with, and drawling bemusedly, [[Warhammer40K "Waaaagh?"]] * [[Tropers/LadyBealzabub This Troper]] apparently sings German and Japanese showtunes in her sleep. * This troper once, while staying with her sister and sister's ex boyfriend in New York during the holidays experienced on of these. Because they lived in a one bedroom apartment I usually slept on a blow up mattress in the TV room. One night while I was typing on my computer I hear the light go on, and since it's past midnight I switch it off and pretend to be asleep. Anyway, I hear someone rambling towards me, so I squint my eyes open, only to be unceremoniously shoved off the bed by my sister's boyfriend while he mumbled 'Zoe, get the sheets'. I sat rather perturbed on the floor before I got my sister to wake up and fetch him. On a separate occasion, again while staying with my sister, I heard her mutter several times in her sleep 'T, do you really want that hairdo? It's so ugly.' When I woke up and asked 'What?' she just grumbled 'it so is' at me and rolled over. Evidently, she was addressing me at the time and its well known that my sister and my mom think I could do more with my hair. The subconcious confounds. * This troper (hereafter referred to as "I") stays up at night while his girlfriend usually goes to bed at around 10 o'clock to get up early for class. One night my girlfriend shot up, looked me dead in the eyes and said "Four beats" while holding up four fingers with her thumb pointing inward before falling back down. Another night, she shot up again and asked if I wanted to trade the ladybugs for the shoes. Both times I replied with "what?" and she repeated the questions in irritated tones. These were very creepy as she had a zombified blank stare. * This troper's father did this once. He was sleeping in his bed at night and suddenly sits bolt upright and yells "no! Not the slippers!" and falls down in the bed again, snoring, leaving this troper wide

awake and very confused. * While in the army this troper experienced an epic non sequitur. One of his roommates had gone to bed early and was lying in his bed giggling to himself and muttering to himself "I can see you move down there..." while wiggling his toes. When we called to him to stop, since we were laughing so hard it was getting difficult to breathe, he sat bolt upright, pointed at us and shouted "You have extremely small penises!!" before falling back down to sleep. I almost died laughing. * This troper, according to her mother, had several of these whilst sleeping as a child. On one occasion, I apparently sat bolt upright and yelled "The kerry bombs! The kerry bombs are here!" before falling back down to the bed again, and, on another occasion, muttered something along the lines of "No... give me back the mushroom!". What the heck a "kerry bomb" is, I have no idea. ** A cherry bomb with XtremeKoolLetterz. * This troper's mother, who works in a store, was half-asleep and asked if our cat had counted the cigarrettes yet. * This troper's brother was at a Boy Scout camp when one of his sleeping tentmates said, quite loudly, "Don't touch the kitchen porridge!" ** The above troper would also like to mention that another member of the aforementioned brother's Boy Scout troop once sat up in the middle of the night and yelled, "Dude! Stop telling me how to spell Wednesday! It's W-E-D-N-E-S--" He stopped there. To this day, we are unsure as to whether he really does know how to spell Wednesday. * In an example similar to the ''JimmyNeutron'' example cited on the main article, this troper recalls hearing on ''SportsCenter'' how a hockey player gets decked in the middle of a game. He's dragged back to the bench and asked how many fingers by the trainer, and after a moment responds "Thursday." ** I don't remember if it was a real story or something on a TV show (think it was the latter), but I heard an example of "Orange" as the answer to the fingers question. * There wasn't a hit on the head, but [[Tropers/LordTNK this troper's]] brother woke up, looked right at me, and asked me to fetch the blue condoms. Then he went right back to sleep. He was fourteen, and neither of us owned any condoms at the time. * This troper recalls a time when he went to wake up a friend who was late for work. He simply rolled over and muttered "Don't worry, the people will take care of it." * When this troper was 12 years old, he went on a scout camp and tented with a kid notorious for his dramatic homesickness. I woke at some time very early in the morning to hear him snoring. As a trivia buff, I knew that he was in the deepest part of sleep. It was rather surprising, then, when he suddenly belted "mommy! waaah!" before proceeding to snore again. ** [[Tropers/MinusZero This troper]] is you. * Shortly after this troper turned 13, he woke up early in the morning adamantly convinced that [[ASeriesOfUnfortunateEvents Count Olaf]] was trying to break into the house, and came very close to waking his parents and telling them to book it before coming back to his senses. The difference between this example and most others is that i was

fully conscious at the time. * [[Tropers/{{Malimar}} This troper]] was sleeping once when his roommate walked in. He said something that made perfect sense at the time, within the context of the dream he was having, and woke up immediately afterwards. The troper cannot remember what it was that he really said, but the roommate later described it as "speaking in tongues". ** This troper had a similar thing occur. A friend was trying to wake her up when she stated simply, "I thought dinosaurs were extinct." It made perfect sense within the context of the dream. This troper was then awoken by her friend's laughter. ** And in the same vein, this troper (reportedly) once shouted [[SonicTheHedgehog "Chaos Control!"]] in his sleep shortly before waking to stifled laughter. *** Y'know, [[{{nine}} this dude]] really wants to know what that dream was about. ** With this troper, it was "Can I have that line again, please?" ** For this troper, it was "I need to get a boogie-board on the way down." And on another occasion, "Save me some macaroni." ** For This Troper it was "Don't put the ferret in the smokehouse". We have neither a ferret, nor a smoke house. ** This troper's sister tells him that he does this quite often. "Queen purple bee won't fit in the boat!" ** This troper wins the ominous prize with the line "excellent. The body is mine". Again, it made sense in context of the dream, whatever that was... *** This troper knows: you're [[DemonicPossession possessed]]. Time for the [[GoodHurtsEvil sacred]] [[KillItWithFire flame]] [[Warhammer40K of the Emperor]]! ** This troper's wife came up with "Don't eat that, it's metal" once. But according to her, he beats this by regularly reciting Java code while asleep. ** This troper's mother has informed him that he once walked out to the living room (sleepwalking, obviously) and shouted "No! I'll never do it! Where's the screen door?!" ** This troper's girlfriend was taking a nap, and suddenly said "dear, the basket...". After a brief awkward silence, she said, half awake, "did I say that out loud?" ** One time when this troper was a kid, his mother came to check on him to make sure he was asleep and received the line, "No, no, no, it has to go ''around'' the solar system''. Furthermore, this troper apparently raised an arm and made a circular motion with his arm, index finger raised, in an approximation of an umpire signaling a home run. *** On Christmas 2007, this troper had a flu and was delirious with fever (nice Christmas, huh?). His mother came to check on him to see if he was asleep and received the line: [[{{Transformers}} "Transform and roll out!".]] *** This troper was also kinda delirious with pneumonia at age seven, and apparently said something along the lines of, "There's a dinosaur behind you and a talking black cat on your shoulder. It likes apples." ** This troper was staying at a friend's house for the night, a few

years ago. My friend had fallen asleep, so I was playing some game on the computer in his room. He mumbled something and I turned around and asked, "What?" a bit surprised, as I thought he was asleep. There was a several second pause, and he said, "I'll kill them!". Cue the uneasiness. ** This troper once responded to the question of "What do you want for breakfast?" with "BillClinton". Huh. ** This troper's mother asked "What time were you supposed to get up today?" What appears to have happened was that the troper was awake for the first half of the sentence, but passed out midway through, so the response came out "Between six and nine degrees Celsius." ** This troper's friend likes to tell her about the time his parents came into his room while he was asleep, and he was evidently sitting straight up, still asleep, and started saying "When I'm king..." Considering [[JerkAss the nature of said friend]], this troper is not sure whether she should be amused or alarmed. ** One time, this troper was staying at a friend's house. The friend had been awake, while I was still asleep. I distinctly remember him saying that, while I was sleeping, he had downloaded an N64 emulator and every game for the N64. I said, "Even Superman 64?" while still half-asleep. Of course, he hadn't actually said that, and looked completely baffled as I woke up and realized I had said it out loud (or, moreso, realized that he hadn't said that). ** [[Tropers/SukiSelfDestruct My]] friend is infamous for having said "Doctor decompress my scales" in her sleep. I once said "But I don't have any marbles!" in mine. * I've been told by my sister that I once said, "no, I don't know the muffin man" while I was asleep. * This troper has suffered a concussion brought about by a patch of ice and gravity working. Apparently, while at the hospital, he would frequently demand the head of Billy Talent. ** This troper had a friend who got kicked in the head accidentally at school (don't ask how). While we were waiting for his parents to arrive to take him to the hospital, he would ask the time every two minutes exactly with no recollection of having done so previously. * This editor had a recently unconscious friend complain to him that he hates it when the online billing knocks his hand up and out of the cage. * [[NonSequiturThud Non Sequitur Thuds]] apparently run in this troper's family. Her father once infamously shouted after being woken from a nap, "Is that a salad?" He then fell back asleep. ** In a similar situation, she once asked, "Where's the thing you eat squirrels with?" ** This troper's family, too. The same troper who provided the "solar system" story above had a grandfather who once, upon being asked if he was awake (he wasn't), responded with "We're coming into the forties now." * This editor's roommate on his gap year in china related a story of a friend of his muttering in his sleep one night and then, totally unprompted (subverting this trope somewhat in that no blows to the head were required to prompt the outburst) sitting upright in bed, while asleep, and shouting "That's an '''outrageous''' challenge!" and

then lying down and sleeping again. Weird... * This editor apparently used the phrase "Needs more firepower!" in half-consciousness. ** If the line had been "Needs MoreDakka!", you would officially be my hero. *** BOW BEFORE YOUR [[Tropers/{{Pepinson}} NEW GOD]]. * This troper's dorm mate once yelled in Spanish "I hold you that pandas make horrible shoes" - this troper would ''love'' to know what that dream was about. ** It wasn't in Spanish, but this troper once came up with "The pandas are the power source!" It made slightly more sense in context. * This troper's brother denies talking in his sleep, but he really does. The only line I remember was something with toilets and cheese. My mother insists she heard him once recite a 15-digit number in full clarity and said she was worried he was talking on the phone giving away social security numbers or something. * This troper is very dopey when he wakes up in the morning. One time he was eating breakfast at the table in this dopey manner when his father asked him to let the dog out. His response of "I love you too, Dad" was not the response his father expected. * This editor was told to have once jumped out of bed in the middle of the night and yelled at his family to run away. He also makes it a point to ask about the truck's licence number after falling or being hit, but it's a conscious choice. * This troper had a friend who awoke screaming that he hated his mother. Concerned friends asked him if he was having trouble at home, and he had no idea what they were talking about. ** FreudianSlip? * This troper occasionally has his faculties together enough when clobbered to suspect that it's a conscious urge implanted in the human subconscious by cartoons. Of course he has also, on occasion, woken up with no idea who, where, when, or why he is (never after drinking, unfortunately), so, you know...maybe I'm not the most reliable testimony. * In this troper's sophomore year of college she had a suite mate who would occasionally hold entire conversations with other people while asleep. My personal favorite was when she randomly sat up and started shouting "I'm ''so'' tired!" ** This troper has been told she tends to do that too. Apparently, I even once discussed the content of a movie with my sister. According to her, I gave fairly bizarre reasons to why I did not like the film. I have actually yet to see that movie, which my sister found out after I woke up, apparently a few minutes after this conversation took place. * This troper apparently once spoke for ten minutes straight in a made-up, Germanic-sounding language in her sleep. * This Troper admits to not actually waking up for almost an hour after leaving the bed. This has resulted in some rather odd half-awake statements, as many of them are in reference to the nights dreams. "You'd never think that Severus could get so ticked at the mention of sour patch kids..." is a favorite. * As the user keeper of the flame said on gamefaqs, "Chili peppers?!

do the chilis throw WISDOM?!", "And all the walgreenses there will be magical. WOAH! A crossdressing lich!". She posted them as "half-asleep ramblings" * ThisTroper has been known to do this on occasion; most amusingly when he was in third grade and had chicken pox, resulting in him waking up in the middle of the night while muttering, "Mommy, do you still live in the zoo?" * Drunken Posts on [[http://www.greylabyrinth.com/discussion/viewtopic.php?t=1166 this website]]. I cannot guarantee any level of worksafeness. * This gem from this troper's sleeping roommate: "If there's one thing that I've learned... '''''(DRAMATIC PAUSE)''''' ...that would be it." * This troper once awoke with the phrase "And I couldn't close the freaking window!" His mother was also responsible for yelling out "CRITTERS!" before falling back asleep. * Variation on the trope: this troper has a habit of mumbling, and then (when asked what he said) immediately dismiss it as unimportant. On one occasion, the troper's roommate refused to let the matter drop and simply repeated what she ''thought'' she had heard - thus, 'Thank the gods for small mercies' somehow transformed into 'Thanks for shopping at Small Murphy's' and instantly became a RunningGag for any misheard or unintelligible speech. * This troper used to have a tendency to talk in her sleep, according to her friends, and on the odd occasion her mother. One time, her mother asked what Troper wanted for breakfast. The (embarrassing) answer was "Chimpanzee Party Pack." Another time, her father woke her up to ask the same thing, but this time the answer was "Cinderella." This troper could have sworn she had answered "oatmeal." One gem from her friends was the mutter of the name Kyle...when none of them (or this troper) ''knew'' a Kyle at the time. ** Same troper's mother has a similar story from when she was in high school. She walked in the door of their house late at night, and no one was awake. She walks by her younger brother's room, where he sits up in bed and says sternly "What are you doing?" Mother paused at the doorway, unsure of what to do before he sat back down in bed and went to sleep, leaving said mother bewildered. ** Again, same troper was playing soccer in a semi-competitive league, when one game, she got smacked in the face with the soccer ball twice. Once on both sides of her face. The first time, she was disoriented and giggling a little at the fact, but the second time, she was outright cackling like a madman. Seems to be a pattern for when she gets hit in the head, as she recently got hit in the face by a rubber (luckily mostly flat) dodge ball by someone with a good arm. She simply laughed it off, as it was quite hilarious. Oddly enough, she seems to be the one who gets the most injured in gym class... * [[Tropers/{{Nezumi}} This troper]] talks in her sleep, as well. Some of it is relatively mundane -- such as managing to hold surprisingly coherent conversations without waking up. However, according to reports, she once interrupted a nonsequitur discussion about a "SixPack of Cheerleaders" with "A six pack of naked cheerleaders? I want one." It became a running gag for a while. * A friend of this troper one yelled out, "Warren got laundry duty!"

Another one propped himself up on his elbows, faced the guy next to him (who was awake at the time), remarked, "Cha-ching!" and promptly collapsed again. * [[Tropers/ShapeshifterTheTroper This troper]] is, well, infamous for this within her own family. Examples include "mittens", "I suggest...", and "No, Mommy, no, I don't want to play that!", all while asleep, as well as "sleepy babble", which is usually affected. * This troper's roommate mumbles in his sleep on occasion. He has yet to say anything notable. On the other hand, the troper in question was apparently ''very'' entertaining when the anesthesia was applied for his wisdom teeth removal. All I can remember is "There's that taste in my mouth! (this was actually a side-effect from the anesthesia), "I'm going to see how long I can stay awake!" and "can I have a hug?" Note that the last one is something this troper often says while conscious. * This troper once woke up feeling very puzzled in the middle of a conversation about Hamlet she and her friend were having while both asleep (it was what they had been talking about before they went to bed). The friend talks regularly in her sleep, though not usually about Shakespeare: being a very cheerful, sweet-natured girl she has been heard to say things like "Oh, that's nice! That's ''lovely''!" in blissful tones on several occasions. ** This same troper's brother and a friend had apparently both fallen asleep among friends in the last stages of a party. My brother moaned in his sleep "How much are the sausages?" to general laughter which faded into bewildered consternation, when the friend moaned in reply "20p!" (cheap sausages...!) * My wife says I'm renowned for doing this to her. It ranges from me muttering "No telling the crotch story" to actually waking her up and talking at her about "spheres" and "short swords +5," all while I'm asleep. * This troper's little sister once half woke to say "Mom... they're everywhere...". We never knew what "They" were. * [[Tropers/GwenStacyWannabe This troper]]'s aunt reportedly drowsily responded to a question asked by her husband (in regard to the location of...something) with "In the backyard where the grass is growing." Now it's a RunningGag between me and my mother. * This troper (perhaps understandably) has no memory of the event, but, apparently, when she was five or six, she said "You know, I really don't like purple" in her sleep while her mother was in the room. This troper doesn't recall if she was in bed or sleepwalking when this happened. (Incidentally, I actually do like purple.) * This troper had a friend sleeping on the couch who thrashed around, [[CatapultNightmare sat bolt upright]] and fled across the room yelling about "the second spider!" * My mother, while reading a bedtime story to my younger sister, once said; "And Moomin-Mama woke up, and the blood-sample showed 0.64 promille." On another occasion, my grandmother suddenly sat straight up in bed. My grandfather asked her what it was, and she replied: "Oh, that hag, there she goes! Up the wall, across the ceiling, out the window and away." ** [[Tropers/GwenStacyWannabe My]] mom used to insert random phrases into my books when she was tired too...

* This troper has been informed by her mother that during a night as a child, she randomly sat up in bed while her mother was passing by, announced "I'm a very good climber." and thunk, lying down again, still asleep. ...Also, she swears in her sleep if she's having bad dreams. * This troper is a teacher who was once assigned as the room monitor during a school trip. The six students he was looking after told him that he fell off the couch he was sleeping in, stood up half-asleep shouting "What the hell are you laughing at?!", before shambling right into a wall and mumbling something incoherent. * Once while this troper was completely sloshed at a party he apparently leapt up from the chair he was sitting in, declaimed some Shakespeare and collapsed face forward into the sand. Incidentally the Shakespeare wasn't one of the big speeches, but when looked up was a pair of utterly forgettable lines in act 3 of Hamlet. To this day this troper doesn't know why he did that. * This troper was known to make some strange comments while under the influence of anesthetic after getting his wisdom teeth removed, but his father takes the cake. After he had some dental work done, he was given some antibiotic/pain medication. Mildly delirious, he stumbled into my room and sprawled diagonally across the bed. And he demanded ice cream! I reluctantly brought it to him, but after taking one bite, he declared it "too hot" and passed out. For hours. * I always hope that when I go wake up my sister for school, she'll do one of these. Recently, she mumbled something along the lines of "...I don't know who ACT Black is..." so I asked her, "Who's ACT Black?" and she replied, in a sleepily annoyed way, "I don't know! That's why I don't know who my boyfriend is!" What makes it more hilarious is that my sister is known to be a very avid boy-hater. * Tropers/KrazehPenguin is told he mumbles songs in his sleep. * This troper was working an ambulance for a medivac when the flight nurse slipped on ice and received a concussion. When another nurse was evaluating her to see if she would have to flown out as well, she successfully answered the standard questions "Do you know where you are?" and "Do you know what happened?" And then came the third question: "Do you know what day it is?" The nurse looked up brightly, said, in her perfectly normal voice, "Sure, it's purple," smiled, and passed out on the bed. * Once, when in the Navy and on underway deployment, one friend of mine went down to wake another guy up for his watch rotation. The mumbled response he got? "Tell Barry about the panzers". After being jabbed again and told that it's time to get ready for watch, he came back with, "Naw, I got the weekend off." It was only after being told that no, he did ''not'' have the weekend off because we were in the middle of the south Pacific that he finally came to some level of coherency. It still didn't stop him from being late for watch, though. * If this troper is very, very tired (or somewhat tipsy), he will often say a nonsensical noun, frequently "oranges". Followed by "Oranges are good." ** Are you quite certain that you aren't secretly a Captain Jack Sparrow impersonator? I can so totally see him just mumbling that out of nowhere.

* A friend of this troper once shouted "Where's the giant waffle?" after being awakened. * this troper once recalls having a friend of his mumble on and on about "the Adventures at the coffee cake shop". he would talk on and on about how he met his mother, senior citiczens, and "stupid cashiers that asked if I wanted coffee". * This troper's brother occasionally talks in his sleep-always incoherent gibberish, but here's the real fun: if you respond to him, he will carry on a conversation with you. On one occasion this went on long enough that it finally culminated in, "Shut up." To this day, I don't know if "Shut up" was part of the dream, or if he'd woken up enough to work out that I was messing with him. ** Incidentally, variations on the theme run in the family. I tend to make not a lot of sense even when I'm having what passes for a coherent thought, so what would be a NonSequiturThud is par for the course over here. ** Same for [[Tropers/{{Bookhobbit}} this troper]]. It all makes perfect sense in my head, but what comes out is a fragment or two which makes my family go "What are you talking about ''this'' time?" * During a sleepover some years ago, this troper apparently woke her friend up by screaming a big "NOOOO!" and other dramatic lines while in her sleep. According to the friend, I did calm down after a while (while still fast asleep, of course), only to deliver a rather puzzling line: " You're missing the point. That's not your bra, it's a hippopotamus." ** "Don't crush that dwarf; hand me the pliers!" * According to some of the men who fought in the Irish 1916 Easter Rising, Eamonn DeValera (who was in charge of the garrison at Boland's Mills) was catching some rest during a lull in the fighting, when he woke up and started screaming "Set fire to the rails!" over and over until his men calmed him down. Surprisingly (in light of this fact), Boland's Mills was one of the more successful points of the rising. * This troper plays what is essentially a {{Sherlock Holmes}} Expy just younger and a bit more inexperienced, and loved to give him such remarks whenever he's hit with something, the following phrase has been used, generally as {{Shout Outs}} or {{Take That}} for the detective genre: ** [[EdgarAllanPoe "An Oranatang? What an idiotic twist!"]] ** [[AgathaChristie "Told you the Belgium's a twit!"]] ** [[{{Columbo}} "And another thing..." * thud* ]] * this troper once tried to wake her mother up from a nap. Mom responded "Did you forget to walk the Elephants? Good." * This editor can't remember if he was actually trying to wake his boyfriend up, or if he was reading in bed when his boyfriend randomly started talking in his sleep. Either way, said boyfriend spouted the immortal line: "That fish looks really funny swimming around on the sign like that." When I asked him what he was talking about, he pointed up at the ceiling, said, "That one. Right there," and passed out again. It has since become a RunningGag. * This troper's sister was holding a conversation with her half-asleep mother. About halfway through the conversation, his mother said very clearly, "It will be Cocoa Puffs for them." She still has no memory of

saying this. ** "Corn Flakes. It's always Corn Flakes." * This troper's little sister went through a phase of sleepwalking during her teens. Two events stand out in the family's memory - the time she walked into our parents' bedroom, shouted "IT'S IN THE MIDDLE!" and left, and the time she called for Dad, complaining that there was something flying around in her room. He helpfully offered to go get the fly spray. This earned him a look of utter contempt, and the immortal phrase: "It's not ''alive!'' It's a ''basket!''" * I once heard my alarm go off at 6 in the morning and started sobbing, because he was so tired and he didn't want to get up. But I do. I get into the shower, and try to get out, but then my sister walks into the bathroom. She asks, "Are you okay?" I yell back at here, "Get out! MY EYES HURT!" I was really tired, you see, and the water made my eyes hurt worse. She leaves. I try to get dressed, then say, "Screw this, I'm missing school today." I go back to sleep, I wake up in the morning when my alarm goes off. Apparently what had happened was, I dreamed that my alarm went off, then woke up at midnight- just as my sister gets home from school. She thought I had gone crazy. Subverted in that I wasn't actually awake and know prescisely what I said and why. * This troper's roommate is an astoundingly lucid sleep-talker. My favorite so far is "Where's the alien?" followed shortly by "BOOM!" * This troper once napped while using AIM on a laptop, which he was still holding while asleep. After (or possibly before) waking up, he typed "hmm...not sure if we can go any farther", "no, that wasn't true", and a few other incoherent statements, much to the confusion of the person receiving the messages. After being slightly more awake, it was explained with the following: "but it had something to do with me finishing the letter M in my dream, and not being able to move on to others because we couldn't access them. I don't know who "we" is in that context, btw. or what we were doing. just that something was going on. it involves penguins I think" * This troper had gotten some new rubber bands for her braces, and had ended up drooling on her pillow. She leapt out of her bed in the middle of the night, and recalls freaking out about "worms in the bed". My mother came in to ask what was wrong, and was confused since I couldn't complete a sentence. She asked if I was awake, to which I reportedly replied "I'm not sure." * [[Tropers/BretheWriter This troper]] was exhausted and ill, but went to her class anyway to take a Music Theory test. The test ended up being a take-home one, and it wasn't until she got around to finishing it later when she'd had a couple cups of coffee that she realized she had somehow written that one of the cadences was "dancing" rather than "deceptive". (There is no such thing as a dancing cadence.) ** She also fell asleep in the middle of a biology test--''and continued taking the test''. When the teacher handed it back, one of the answers was illegible but seemed to contain something about pandas. (The course, while biology, was in fact ''marine'' biology, and this troper is fairly certain pandas are not by any stretch of the imagination marine.) * This troper's grandmother, while sick with shingles and delirious,

muttered something about "Manwell's brain" at one point when we were taking care of her. She naturally doesn't remember this at all. * "I'm looking for my little stick", was the answer I got when I asked my sleepwalking sister what she was doing out of bed. * [[Tropers/MadSurge This troper]] once woke up his parents jumping out of his bed and shrieking about "the slugs with pointy teeth". The next day he didn't remember any of it until his dad asked him if the slugs left on him bite marks. We still have quite some laughs about it! * This troper was on a car ride home from the dentist where I was put under anaesthesia to have some teeth filled, which left me slightly giggly and nonsensical. My mother, at the time, had a GPS system that would let her know, in a female voice, "You are exceeding the speed limit". It keeps saying it if you don't slow down, and apparently it bothered me, because I turned to my mom and yelled "Mom, will you slow down so she'll SHUT UP?!" Another notable quote involved the twoof us at Burger King and I had noticed that the regular lemonade fountain had recently been replaced with pink lemonade, which apparently excited me to the point where I walked my cup of pink lemonade over to my mother and shouted "Dude, look, it's PINK." while giggling. * This troper wound up passing out on stage due to a combination of hot stage lights, an improperly laced corset, and the too-small dress the corset had been required for stuffing her into. Upon coming to with paramedics, other cast members, and her mother hovering over her, the first words out of her mouth were "Oh, that's nice... but why do they have blue beaks?" ** Incidentally, at the exact same moment, a preschool teacher responded to a picture of birds colored by a colorblind child with "I passed out on stage, didn't I?" * This troper once concussed herself while putting lights on a Christmas tree by accidently standing up into a cabinet. According to her mother, the troper backed out from under the cabinet, stood up, carefully made her way out from behind the tree, walked over to a table, pulled out a chair, and carefully sat down before passing out cold. * This troper remembers being at a school retreat, in a cabin with several other girls. In the middle of the night, all of them were woken by a half-moan, half-scream of, "Too much food! Too... much... FOOD!" The babbling was traced to a cabinmate who was then shaken awake; the cabinmate proceeded to insist that she had been totally awake, and had heard no such thing. The same troper also remembers a friend who passed out from severe sunburn and was confined to her bed for a day. The friend woke up once to say again and again, "I have to get up. I have to get ready. I have to shower. We're going to church." * This troper has a few in her family. ** Her cousin, after getting ridiculously drunk, once suddenly proclaimed that "Jesus is here in this room" before falling to his knees, saying "I bow to Jesus" and then promptly passing out. On another occasion, when asking how many beers he had, he would repeatedly answer, "I don't drink." ** And then there's her brother, who frequently talks in his sleep, mostly incoherently, once quite coherently shouting "MARIO, MARIO!"

before going back to sleep. He also had to have anesthesia once before an endoscopy and, when our mother asked about the foreign sounding name of the doctor, promptly responded, "He's a Greek." Later, he told our mom that he "saw her talking to that ''man'' over there, I'm telling dad". She was actually talking to the doctor. ** Her older brother, while sleepwalking as a child, once woke our parents up and shouted "Mom, don't you ''see'' them?" ** One of her other cousins, who fell asleep some time after he and this troper were playing Mario Party, repeatedly kept insisting in his sleep that it was this troper's turn and "I've been sitting here waiting," and then shouted "Hexagon Heat!" (the name of one of the mini-games). * [[Tropers/{{Zemyla}} I]], in a more serious version, stood up and said "I have to figure this out", and then had an epileptic seizure. Or so they tell me, since I don't remember anything that happened for about an hour before it. I wish I knew what I had to figure out... * [[Tropers/{{Attackrat}} This Troper]] is a perpetual sleeptalker, much to the amusement of family and roommates alike. Some high points: ** At age 9, during a camping trip, I woke up the whole tent when I announced "I'll get the hot sheets, Captain!" and sang the opening bars of the ''Smurfs'' theme. ** During college, one roommate took to quizzing me while I was asleep. Evidently I told him I lived "about 100 miles inland" from where we were in school. ** More recently, when sharing a room with my brothers, my older brother was nearly asleep when I shouted "ONLY THOSE IN THE WEST ARE RIGHTEOUS!" in a tone reminiscent of the Hammerites in the ''Thief'' series of games. [[NightmareFuel He understandably had trouble going back to sleep after that...]] ** In a similar situation, just a few weeks ago my younger bro informed me that I had spent the night planning an assault on an enemy position of some sort: "Now, if we go around the back way we might catch them off guard, but if we cut across the low area we shall fall under their long guns." * When this troper is woken up in the middle of an especially vivid (and bizarre) dream, she normally wakes up muttering the last line spoken in the dream, even if it was supposed to be said by someone other than her. The most memorable lines she's said while still halfasleep: "Yes, but I have only one ticket so we're stuck," "Yes, it's due TOMORROW," (with a "stern, you're-not-getting-out-of-this-one teacher" emphasis on the last word), and "I don't want a diamond; I want to dance on a pedestal!" * This troper got into a very odd situation. He sleep-DROVE (NOT KIDDING!) to work after falling half-asleep while watching SportsCenter. After logging on to TVTropes, (I have an amazing mental map, I guess) I awoke saying the statement "The Mets have a new Coach!" * [[Tropers/{{Seiryu}} This troper]] had an inversion. He was in that place where you're not quite awake, but not quite sleeping at the time. Capable of coherent thought, but no memories, this troper asked himself "Who am I, where am I, and why am I covered in feathers?" Then it occurred to this troper that one of the three questions didn't

sound quite right, and bolted straight up in bed. No feathers in sight. Cue the phrase "What the hell?" * Many years ago, this troper shared a bedroom with her sisters, and had a problem with rolling out of the bed. One day she rolled out of bed, and her sister noticed. Said troper immediately began yelling at her sister for letting the bunnies get away, and went back to bed. She was still angry about the bunnies the next day, but now wonders what was running through her head... * This troper can't even remember what was said, but he knows that, for whatever reason (maybe not enough sleep?), he delivered one of these in a high school choir some number of years ago. He regained enough consciousness a minute or so later to wonder why he had said... whatever it was. Fortunately, whatever he said couldn't have been that bad, as no one ever made a big deal about it, and we are talking about ''high school'' here. * [[Tropers/{{Ripsaw}} ThisTroper]] has a friend who related a story to him once. Friend and his brother were sharing a room for some reason. Friend was awake (reading or playing a video game, don't quite remember), when Friend's brother sits bolt upright, makes eye contact and asks "How many cups of sugar does it take to get to the moon?". Friend, scared shitless, replies "Three?". Brother: "OK" ''thud''. Dead asleep, did not remember the conversation the next morning. ** Wasn't that in ''AGoofyMovie''? It's on the main article page. *** Story predated the movie. * [[Tropers/FyreNWater This troper]] was delirious a flu-induced fever. She complained, "My eyeballs are too hot!" then passed out and [[WhatDoYouMeanItsNotAwesome half-sang, half-mumbled parts of ''Through the Fire and Flames'']]. * [[Tropers/SparrowRedhouse This troper]] has very vivid dreams, and frequently when being awoken from them will see things when first waking up. For example, once when her mother tried to get her out of bed, she saw her mother piling her stuff on her bed to try and get her out of it. Though when she woke up for real, nothing was on her bed and it was probably just part of her dream carried over upon being only half-awake. Also, sometimes if she is having a bad dream, she can get enough control in it that pinching herself or yelling in the dream will wake her up. Once she woke up saying something like "No, ''you can't make me do that!''" startling her college roomate, and another time she was having a [[NightmareDreams truly bad dream]] and woke up yelling. It scared her Dad, and her Mom came down to check on her. She was fine once she woke up, though. * When I was playing through Ocarina of Time for the first time at a friend's house, he sat up in a daze, grabbed the controller from my hand (which was black, btw) and said "You can't... the black legos." I looked at him, he frowned, dropped the controller and went back to sleep. * When I had a serious fever, I had been watching a SailorMoon marathon (fansub tapes, not the dub, which makes it even stranger.) I got up, panicked, and went into the front room where my Dad was. I said "Where did Josh and Amy go?" My dad said "Who's Amy?." I was convinced both Josh (my friend) and Amy (meaning Sailor Mercury) were visiting and I fell asleep entertaining them both.

* This troper has a college roommate who stays up late playing WorldOfWarcraft. One night, at 3 in the morning, I was sleeping and Roomie was leveling up. Then, as he told me the next day, I said something along the lines of "Aaiieeee! Mmmh...hrrm...Snorkel...mmm...." while asleep before going silent again. * This troper was once smoking pot in a shed with a couple of people when she apparently said, "Hey look, tweed!", then fainted onto the work bench. She does not remember this. * This troper remembers her dad talking about a hunting trip he went on with his friend and, while half-asleep, troper's dad's friend said something like, "I feel like I snorted up a whole box of Triscuits," and was silent the whole rest of the night. * This troper's younger sister talks in her sleep from time to time. He went to wake her up one morning. Her response? "Orange monkeys." Dumbfounded does not describe his reaction well enough. * This troper nearly fell asleep while writing something (I can't remember what it was though) and every word ended up being replaced with a word that sounded kind of like that word (E.G "Onomatapeia" became "orangutan" and "Metaphor" became "Metallord"). In a non-vocal version, I once woke up, turned on my Xbox, grabbed the controller (backwards) and tried to play (I think I headbutted the controller at one point) before throwing the controller to the ground and going back to sleep. I guess I threw the controller because I thought it was broken (I hadn't turned the TV on). I remember this happening, but not very clearly. * [[Tropers/{{Sus}} This troper]] once bolted up to sitting position in his bed, fast asleep, and yelled [[{{Peanuts}} "Give me back my blanket!"]] at the top of his lungs. Cue his somewhat perplexed mother coming in to ask what the racket was all about... My answer? * pointing towards my little sister's bed* "But she hid my mattress... " and then falling properly asleep again. * In an extremely strange example: Just a few minutes ago, this troper was reading this page and chuckling. Her dad's alarm went off, so she minimized the page and went to wake him up, waving his alarm and telling him, "Time to get up, it's seven o'clock." He opened his eyes, still half-asleep, and muttered, "I thought you weren't going to work today." Mind you she is fifteen and has yet to have a 'real' job in her life. Naturally, being a true geek, she had to come back here and edit this page immediately. Of course, her dad does these sorts of things all the time, along with her sister. * This troper apparently did this...one morning her brother asked her what she meant by something she'd said the night before. When this troper got confused, he told her that "You said said, out loud 'I'm coming with you, Chocolate Dirt.' And I asked what that meant and you said you'd tell me in the morning. So, what did you mean?" Needless to say, the troper has ''no'' idea. ** This same troper's grandfather was woken up when Troper's uncle suddenly shouted in his sleep "There's a couger at the door!" * This tropers sister once, completely out of the blue, for no reason, said "The bed is mistook for a seven year old"....I dare you to make less sense!!

** The same troper as above once woke up from a dream and said:"And that's why zombies and children dont mix!", all I can remember about the dream was that it involved: [[NoodleImplements a video store, a see-saw, and a statue of the hulk.]] * This troper apparently sat up in bed once and sang "Rudolph the RedNosed Reindeer" twice through before laying back down. Also, she once asked her mom what a soft pencil was (ItMakesSenseInContext), to which said sleepy mother replied, "The way a cucumber is cut..." ** In addition, she was once responded to her mother waking her up to school with "But what about... what about..." (and with a real sense of urgency) before realizing that she had no idea what the problem was. ** She's also managed to freak her atheist father (who doesn't even scare when you jump out of nowhere and attack him) with the line, "[[{{The Grim Reaper}} The white spotted snake]] is coming to visit Papa, and it's the same white spotted snake that visited Grandpa." 'Grandpa' had died recently, and 'Papa' was on his death bed. Around that time, she also woke her mother up late at night and pointed to the window, asking "Who's that?" * This troper's best friend apparently was once caught mumbling in her sleep by her mother, who tried to wake her up and was met with a very coherent "''I don't like the horses.'' Put. AWAY. The '''''HORSES'''''", after which she just passed completely back out. * Apparently [[Tropers/TubalCain This Troper]] screamed something about "moldy macaroni" hen he was younger. * [[Tropers/SpiriTsunami This troper]], while having contributed to this page before, has yet to realize his true potential for this, as he occasionally dreams entirely in non sequiturs, just a random string of words appearing before his eyes, and he's trying to read them, but they keep changing, and often one word gets repeated two or three times in a row in the string, and it's really bizarre. * This troper's father once told him of one of his father's cousins, who, when on a camping trip, was talking in his sleep and, when asked what he was doing, vehemently replied "I'm climbing this tree! What's it look like I'm doing?" [[HilarityEnsues Hilariously]], the cousin in question vehemently denied having had a dream about climbing a tree when asked about it in the morning. In a similar vein, this troper's cousin once told him of his rather involved battle plan while sleeping, apparently dreaming that he was a general. He, however, remembered the dream when asked about it the next morning. * This troper was reported by a friend during a sleepover to have said, very clearly, "I LOVE YOU MEIN SCHATZ, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! ALLES GUTE ZUM GEBURTSTAG!". This troper isn't German.... * This troper once underwent general anesthesia for some minor surgery, and the next thing he knew, he was incoherently mumbling around [[MouthfulOfPi 70 digits of pi]] as he was waking up. * While waiting for the anesthetic to knock me out for similarly minor surgery, I began discussing Jules Verne's ''20,000 Leagues Under the Sea'' with the anesthesiologist. Upon waking, I asked the nurse to fetch him. When he arrived, I assured him how much I liked the book. I promptly fell asleep. He told the story to my mother, and apparently found it very amusing.

* While drifting between wakefulness and sleep this troper once sat bolt upright And shouted "Of course. It's the ''regular'' gun mount, Rupert!" This troper has no idea who rupert is or how he came up with that name. * I thought my little brother was asking me what the pokemon move Pursuit did, so I described it's effect of dealing double damage to pokemon who switch out on the turn it's used. The next day, I asked him if he needed any more help with pokemon. Then he told me that I was fast asleep at 11 AM before blurting that out randomly, he hadn't said a damn thing and I was dreaming apparently. Making it a NST from his perspective. * [[Tropers/AntipathicZora This troper's]] mother apparently once had an entire conversation with this troper's father in his sleep about building scaffolding (father is a construction worker), which apparently culminated in him shouting "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!" and falling back asleep. * This troper has an odd tendency to do "dream maths" whenever tired, confused and/or disoriented. Appearantly, he mumbles about calculations involving 'numbers' mashed together from different languages - like twelveandthirzig or the elusive quatro-twentuno. His friends and family enjoy asking him math questions when he wakes up, because the answer is ''never'' correct, and his explanations for how he calculated them are appearantly hilarious ("Derive the int, cover the twelve, then add...iply the results.") * This troper has only been known to talk in her sleep on a few rare occasions, the most notable of which was when she said "God, I wish all of you would just leave me alone!" while sleeping in a camper with her family. She woke herself up, immediately realizing the absurdity of what she had just said, so when her brother, who also woke up, said "what?," she rather meanly replied "Nothing! Just go back to sleep!" Which he did. * [[Tropers/MisterAlways This troper]] is prone to this when he eats before sleeping. Examples: ** Shouting " KNECKEHBRUHT!" at somebody while sleeping. Apparently, said person was trying to pull the old "hand in a glass of water" trick on him. And "kneckehbruht" (probably spelled incorrectly) is... some language for "crackers". He first heard the word when he was five. This occured when he was fourteen. Yay for the subconcious! *** I think you mean KNCKEBROT, which is German for crispbread. ** Mumbling the lyrics to SystemOfADown's "Arto" in his sleep. The song doesn't have lyrics, it's just a lot of screaming and moaning. He was even whistling for the parts with that weird flute... thing. ** Mumbling " The rabbits want to go sledding, pudding pie poprocks" while napping on a friend's couch after a particularly hefty lunch at [=McDonald's=]. Weirdly, this was in English, while this troper is natively Dutch. Then again, he speaks more English than Dutch in his average life, so... ** " I want to borrow ten thousand. So. You wanna borrow ten thousand? You can't." during a stay at a friend's house. This is actually a quote from something I won't link to as it's in Dutch. ** Bolting up, grabbing somebody by the shoulders and SCREAMING for about eight seconds, or so he's told. When they asked this him wether

or not he was having a nightmare, he said he remembered something about " [[Achewood Cartilage...]]". Yes, the first Cartilage Head creeped him out immensely. ** " I ride the train to humrlnumbledergrrrrrble." The last part was substituted by his sister, who heard him saying it when she snuck into his room to steal money at night. Apparently, hearing me talking while she was in the middle of sneaking my wallet from my pants startled her immensely. * This trope dude does that. Often. Like "Garbledina", "Find all your TP and flap away, Prespberterian", "Not quite what I was expecting" and, most famously "All your cake are belong to lies". I know this as I have a baby moniter in my room (?) and I watch it to see what funny stuff I say sometimes. * Not an injury or sleeptalking, but related: This Troper has a friend who, while going under anaesthesia for surgery, sang all the way through ''YellowSubmarine''. The fun part is that under normal conditions, all she can sing is the chorus. * The other night, this troper and her sister were sleeping over at a friend's. I was awoken in the middle of the night by my sister sitting up and speaking. Unfortunately, what she said was not in English, or indeed any language I have ever heard. I asked what she'd said, and she told me I had to go punch out the tuna because her stomach hurt to much. I told her to go to sleep. She said "OK" and flopped back down asleep. I was considerably creeped out. * This troper has only been reported to talk in her sleep onnce( when she was little, her mother asked her if she was asleep, and she replied "sleep with a sheep"), but she has said strange things in the following occurences: ** When she was hit very hard by a dodge-ball and knocked over, a friend asked if she was ok, and was answered with "m y sled is powered by chocolate milk". ** When she was on heavy mediacation for an asthma attack and in the hospital, keep singing (mostly awake) "Don' Stop Me Now". ** And sometimes when leaving the dentist, my brain hasen't really woken up from being so mellowed by the laughing gas. So she will say strange things that actually kinda make sense, but are still weird. Such as " Team Rocket doesn't want Pikachu, cuz he's rare, it's, it's... because they can't have him. It's like he's forbidden or...somethin'. even though she hasn't watched Pokemon for at least five years! ** And lastly, she hardly ever shows signs of being drunk after alchohol consumption. So after drinking four small bottles of Korbel champagne, she had no trouble walking, talking normally, or logical reasoning. Until a friend asked why she only listened to Slow Jams by Jaimee Foxx after she drinks. The reply: "Cuz it makes meh feel goooood!!!. Indeed. *** And did I mention I was really wasted when posting these examples. Seriously, I'm usually pretty OK at spelling and grammar. But then, I'm drunk now...Maybe I should stop drunk-typing... * This troper had a friend whose friend (yeah, I know) whose family owns a convenience store and live above it. One night they went down to get something snacky out, but they had to wake the kid up. While he

was fumbling with the keys a police officer stopped by (the others were just around the corner watching IIRC) and the kid turned to him and said "Don't worry. I'm the owner of the son" (though it could be misheard as "sun") without realizing what he was saying. After finding the right key, the officer left with a bemused smile on his face. * This Troper woke up at 1:00 A.M. one day (fully conscious and without any medicine, illness, or injuries) convinced that she had to get up for school. I got up, made toast with strawberry jam, and munched it while staring at the clock. I 'realized' that it was 1:00 and, thinking it was the afternoon, vaguely comforted herself with thinking that she would just 'time travel to the beginning of school' Just as ThisTroper finished her toast, she realized that it was the middle of the night, and went to sleep in the basement, later waking up on the top floor. * This troper once had surgery to figure out if he had the same form of heart disease that afflicts his brother and dad (Brugada). Apparently, after the anesthesia was applied, my parents told me I was a cat. I was wheeled into the operating room, meowing as I went. The same thing happened to my sister, who said "Wheeeeeee!" as she went in. * This troper's family often compete for the right to wake her up, in hope of gems like these: ** "No, mom! You don't ''actually'' have to put [[Yu-Gi-Oh Atem]] in the Rubik's Cube!" ** "WHERE ARE MY GODDAMN TRUFFLES?!" ** "Ugh. I can't see my legs." ** "That's not [[AvatarTheLastAirbender Aang]]! That's a bookshelf!" * This troper's sister once came up (while sleeping on holiday) with the rather perplexing, "No! I need the crystal back immediately!". * This troper's younger sister once said while half asleep, in a very creepy monotone, "Come here, little girl. What's the matter? Do you think I'm going to HURT YOU?" Needless to say, I was quite disturbed. * This troper has quite a few. ** This troper was found trying to sit in a trashcan. When asked what I was doing, I replied with "I'm looking for polka dots!" as if the person who asked was an idiot. I then curled up on the floor & went to sleep. ** This troper reportedly, at age four, rolled off her bed, down a stepstool & into her closet without waking up. ** I to a boarding school. In my Freshman year of high school, I was woken up in the middle of the night when my roommate climbed down from her bunkbed, took of her pants & started hitting me with them, saying that we had to go get her car. She then got back into her bed, carrying her pants with her. Not only was she fourteen at the time, but I have never known her to sleepwalk or sleeptalk since. ** This troper has also been known to sit up, spout incoherent nonsense, then fall over, usually off the bed. Such statements include, "Your colour is HORSES," "I'm running. I'M RUNNING- IT'S IN. THE HAT. DEPARTMENT," "That looks GREAT on you, Dad!" & "Mew Airlines, flight 308." * This troper had a friend years ago at a sleep over for some class, who, when most of us were already awake but he was still asleep,

yelled "No! Not the golden baba!" * [[Tropers/KilroyWasHere This troper]] once fell asleep at a friends house, and apparently began speaking Japanese. I DO NOT SPEAK JAPANESE. Then again, we had just finished [[MetalGearSolid MGS2]]... * While this troper has no memory of the incident, his Anesthesiologist claims that, before going under for an appendectomy, said "There's a lizard crawling behind my eyes but not on the optic nerve." * During a road trip, this troper's brother fell asleep only to suddenly jump up and sing the opening lines to the DoctorSnuggles theme song before subsequently falling back asleep. He subsequently denied any memory of such an event. * This troper had to wake her little brother up after he had fallen asleep on the couch. When she was taking him the room they previously shared, he just stopped in the middle of the hallway. When she asked him what he was doing, he replied with, "I dropped my papadi," and bent down to pick up the invisible object. Then, he asked, "I can't find my glasses." He wasn't wearing any glasses to begin with. * During a vacation, this troper's family was woken by this troper singing "Rum Tum Tugger" in his sleep. ** [[Tropers/LadyBealzabub This Troper]] has done the same, except with Growltiger's Last Stand. * This Troper's brother's name is Milo, and her father swears he once heard her yell in her sleep, "No Milo! Not the hippopotamus!" * This troper's choir teacher once told her about how when she was in college she was mocked endlessly by her room-mate for having once, in her sleep, started singing the alto part to a song they were studying very very loudly, and kicking the bed sheets rhythmically along. * Since sleep-talking apparently counts, I have an amusing story a friend once told me about her old boyfriend: He once got up while sleeping and announced "I have to eat those crisps ''now''!". She informed him that he could eat the crisps (potato chips) later on if he wanted, and this apparently assuaged him, as he laid back down and was quiet the rest of the night. * At approximately age seven, this troper apparently walked into her parents' bedroom in the middle of the night and asked her mom a question about [[FinalFantasyVII Materia]]. On another occasion, her older brother once started shouting "AAAAAAGGGH! ANTS!" in his sleep. And one of her friends is very prone to this at sleepovers: ** Once she sat up, looked directly at me, and asked, "Where's Abby?" Abby is my name, and neither of us was especially familiar with another one at the time. ** Another time, she got very upset and repeatedly insisted that "Abby told me to push the big red button." I hadn't said anything like that, ever. ** The most recent incident was when we all fell asleep watching a movie, and then I woke up in the middle of the night and decided to turn off the DVD player. My friend sat up and demanded "What are you doing?" in a very frustrated voice. I replied that I was turning off the DVD player, and then she rolled her eyes, gave a very audible exasperated sigh, and passed out again. * I was asleep on the couch. My parents had just finished watching the

episode of ''Series/DoctorWho'' with [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel the weeping angels.]] I proceeded to ''freak my parents out big time'', by saying in my sleep "The angels have the phone box." I had been dreaming about that episode, playing the part of the doctor. * [[Tropers/{{MiraShio}} Mira-chan]] fell asleep on the couch once, and her friend tried to wake her up a number of times. Unsuccessfully. 'Cause each time her friend tried, she'd ''laugh''--not just chuckle or giggle, mind you, but ''laugh''. * Thanks to non-stop listening, and a over 9000 level of [[EarWorm Catchyness]], this troper reportedly had to be woken up because he wouldn't stop singing the remix of "PUT DAT COOKIE DAAAUUNGH!!!" in his sleep. * This troper's friend took a shower in the middle of the night, apparently fully asleep. In the morning his parents found him asleep on a very wet sofa. * This troper and his sister once went into surgery to see if they had a kind of heart disease that my brother and dad have. Apparently, after being put on anesthetic, my family told me I was a cat and I was wheeled into the OR meowing. My sister went "Weeeeeeee!" * One of this troper's old history teachers once told us a story about how he got knocked out by a baseball to the head. When he woke up, they asked him who he was, and delivered the Batman line. He pretty much ''had to'' explain why his old jersey said "Batman" on it. * This troper was once woken by her mother after an hour's sleep. Her mother was asking what she wanted for breakfast. My response? "It doesn't matter, because I have REGENERATION!" Cue me waking up to my mother laughing and wondering what was going on. * Case in point, upon prodding awake a friend of mine one day when he fell asleep in the delivery van we were driving, he announced, in a "whiny three year old" like voice "I don't wanna be a chicken mcnugget!"... he never could figure out what he was dreaming of to generate that particular response. * This troper, while a kid, shared a bedroom with his brother and once heard him speaking quite clearly, apparently to a friend: "What's that, Jamie? ...French cats? ...French cats eating ice cream?" - this troper then wailed "WAKE UP!!!" * This troper's mother scared the You-Know-What out of her when, upon waking from a doze she - the mother - asked me to call Longwood Elementary and tell them she wouldn't be in monday. Only problem, she didn't work for Longwood Elementary but for a certain state university that shall remain nameless. Turned out she'd not only forgotten that but the last four or so months of her life. But I wasn't to worry... * This troper was sleeping at a friend's house when she awoke in the middle of the night, quite alarmed, because aforementioned friend was almost sobbing 'I'm sorry I forgot the grapes, dad!' The next time she slept at my house, she yelled 'FUCK MY LIFE,' waking up this troper's sister in the process. * This troper's father has done some brilliant sleep-talking in his time; 'I'm bouncing around, give me a sandwich', 'Leave it alone, it's only a hat' and 'He's stealing my cellotape!' * This troper's roommate talks in his sleep from time to time. Usually it's just incoherent muttering, and sometimes it's in Thai, but from

time to time he says something really funny in English. Most memorably, I walked into the room late one night to be greeted with 'Stay clean, stay dry...[[MetalGear la li le li lo]]...' * [[Tropers/{{Seiryu}} This troper]], after putting on a show involving a fireball on a chain (ItMakesSenseInContext, I swear) was left very dizzy. After a friend offered to help this troper back on his feet, pulled a [[{{Firefly}} Jayne Cobb]], and started randomly grabbing at the air, and said something to the effect of "Oh, thank God! The Paladin is here!" Considering that the friend in question is very devoutly Christian, he was amused, confused, and bemused, all at once. * From Tropers/EverShadowGenesis: ** [[CloudCuckoolander Parallaxus]]: are there unicorns flying around my head... ** [[DecoyProtagonist Matthew]]: [[ShoutOut No one expects]] [[MontyPythonsFlyingCircus the Spanish Inquisi...]] ** [[TheHero Johnson]]: I am a brave and gallant knight... ** [[MonsterClown Ein Woe]] * [[Tropers/AcrossTheStars I]] frequently have this happen when a) sleep deprived or b) whacked out on some sort of painkilling/sleep inducing prescription drug. Also there was the time with the Tylenol, but we [[NoodleIncident won't talk about that...]] * This troper apparently holds resemblance to the queen, as her sleeping cousin sat straight up, looked at her, and bowed deeply while murmuring "Your Majesty" before falling flat on his back, out cold again. * This Troper once woke up her friend by shouting about fairies. Then another time, her friend woke this Troper up by asking what time it was. A lot. * At some point during this troper's drama club a few years ago, my teacher (a somewhat heavy man) slipped while demonstrating a skit and fell, toppling on top of me (a somewhat small 10 year old). I wasn't hurt, just knocked my head a little bit. Apparently when a friend rushed over and asked if I was okay, I replied: "Mah head's a tomato." I snapped out of it the second afterward, but it still gained some concerned looks (and a giggle or two) from the people around me. More recently, my little sister swears she heard me saying in my sleep, "[[TheChroniclesOfNarnia Aslan!]] Not [[SuzumiyaHaruhi Haruhiiiiiii]]....!" * I have bad luck when it comes to sports injuries. If a sport requires a ball to play, said ball has hit me in the head at least once. The usual response is wither a dazed silence (or so I assume), or a 'Oww, my head', alongside my hearing disappearing and then fading back in. However, I had a decent one. Grade 11 gym class, we were practicing volleyball. I did a serve, watched my serve, and as I turn to the left, I get hit by a smash serve from across the gym, on a diagonal. The end result was me in the air, about 5-10 ft backwards before I hit a wall and slumped to the ground. Oddly enough, not a single person (including the person who was not a foot away from me when it happened) noticed the occurenc, and as such missed my one and only uttering of something of value: the classic "Did anybody get the license plate".

** Though, in fashion with the rest of the posts above, I have been known to do the odd random sleep talk, including many I don't recall (doesn't help I say odd things anyways, the Cloudcuckoolander that I am), but the one I do involved myself having left my room, walked down a flight of stairs, and before entering the kitchen being questioned what I was doing. I responded "Making myself a SANDWICH!" before angrily stomping back to my room and continuing to sleep. Don't recall it at all. * Once, this troper was in the ER, and puked very unsettling colors all over the nurse. (I was VERY sick) At which point, I keeled over and said something to the effect of "help me I'm dying!" They finally had to knock me out with a shot of Demorol. In the butt. This troper doesn't remember this, but his father told him that after this, he rolled over, looked at the nurse, delirious with pain and drugs, and said, "...and you seemed so nice..." and passed out. * This troper once had a bad fever that left her near delirious for a while. Her mother woke her up that morning and this troper (who had been dreaming about HarryPotter for some reason) started muttering "he's here...Sirius Black...". * When this troper and her sister were woken up by an earthquake, we ran into our father's bedroom and tried to wake him up. First thing he says: "Channel 99, ding, ding, ding." * Before I was born, my mother and aunt picked up four hitchhikers while driving through Colorado. One of them stayed asleep for the whole drive, except when he once opened his eyes, sat bolt upright and screamed "SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!" at the top of his lungs, then immediately went back to sleep. Another time, this troper had a dream that it was Christmas morning, and when she woke up she ran downstair and was very disappointed to not find a tree in the living room it was the middle of May. * This troper was approached one day in the morning by his cousin about what "Hourai Doll" and "Imperishable Shooting" are. Apparently he was reciting a list of spell cards in [[{{Touhou}} IN]] extra stage while asleep. * This Troper has a brother with a horrible habit of babbling in his sleep. One memorable time, he said, in a very clear voice. "No thanks...I got enough to do...without taking you to the dance, Doc..." To this day, I have no idea what he could have been dreaming about. * This troper's sister recorded this troper sleep-talking. The most memorable one was babbling about brains, a tree, and ''don't poke it''. * A few years ago, after This Troper's family had to move across the country, her little sister started sleepwalking. It was impossible to ignore, due to the fact that they shared a room. Usually, she could be corralled back into her bed fairly quickly, but once made it all the way downstairs where their mother was still awake, and quite clearly said to both of them: "The vampires almost got me, but the angel led me away." She firmly denies any memory of such an event to this day. * This troper used to talk in her sleep, and a particularly famous (around her house, anyway) incident is when she started yelling about "the bugs on the wall". * This troper has one, she and her friend had gotten back from going

to see [[HarryPotter Half Blood Prince]], and had gone to sleep around one. Two or three hours later, I sit up and poke at my friend until she wakes up. The following conversation (That I have NO recollection of, thoughI wish I did...) takes place: ** Me: Mandy! MANDY! - Mandy: Woah, what? - Me: I can't find my pants, I lost them! - Mandy: ...You're wearing a dress. - Me: They're goooooone! - Mandy: ...B-but you're wearing a DRESS. - Me: OH MY GOD. *dramatic pause* Harry Potter stole my pants. - Mandy: ...You're asleep. *rolls over* * [[Tropers/SukiSelfDestruct I]] was once studying for a History test while beyond exhausted. The book mentioned something about the Mongols being from... Mongolia! Cue me saying "Well of course the Mongols were from Mongolia! It's in their freakin' name! What did you think they're from, Wisconsin?!" It would have been hilarious if I'd fallen asleep right then but I didn't. Though my mom urged me to after that. * One night a fan fell over in this troper's bedroom and apparently he told his mom not to mess with it because it always sounds that way when it's downloading. (Helps to know that said troper is a systems admin). * This troper once yelled at a friend for something said friend did in a dream the troper had. Of course, heavy medication was involved due to a bad cold... * This troper dreams in all three languages he speaks and sometimes in Sindarin, which he only halfway-speaks. * This troper learned how to play the [[http://stick.com Chapman Stick]] by watching a kid play one in the troper's dream. A friend of the troper's learned violin the same way. * This troper once woke up to her alarm clock, said, "Hello, Mr. Beep." and then fell back asleep. * This Troper posted this on her Facebook after six hours of doing finals papers: *** walrus walrus my brain is fried oh walrus walrus tell me why Finals suck and so next spring I'll do it again; haven't learned a thing I dreamt of being so many things Now I write walrus poetry Please, God, bring the lightning. * [[Tropers/MonkeyPhysics I]] managed to take a bass amp to the face after losing balance when helping carry it down some stairs (just as painful as it sounds) and apparently spent the trip to hospital demanding to know whether my martini was in the trumpet case. I don't habitually drink martinis, nor do I own a trumpet, so... yeah. * I have apparently said some weird things in my sleep. Some of which include: ** When I was younger, I said "No! My turn!" ** Years later, I swung my feet out of bed and said "Can I give the dog a BJS?" ** Sometime around then, I slightly sat up and said "East Carolina!" * I've once heard my sister talk in her sleep. She said "You can have the (inaudible) socks." I said "What?" She replied with "The (inaudible) socks."

* Once, recently, I woke up, swung my feet out of bed and said "The platypus is..." and I don't know the rest. * A year ago, this troper woke up from a long nap, waddled over to a clock, muttered 'White Sausages', then promptly went back to bed, much to the confusion of my family members who were in the room that time... * This troper's friend does this all the time. The most notable example is, at age five, she sat up in bed (she was sleeping in her mother's bed at the time), pawed at the air, and slurred, "I gotta get those down... cuz they're... on fire." * While on many, ''many'' pain pills, this troper said in the most upbeat, giggly tone, "Doctor! How nice of you to heh, thats toast. Mm, socky. Dont try to" then fell unconscious. They have it on video. It's hilarious. * While asleep my brother's friend's girlfriend said "Where's my four pennies?". * Apparently, one time, [[@/SwerveStar This Troper]] suddenly started laughing uncontrollably in my sleep, before calming down and becoming silent. My friend also told me once that he had a friend sleep over at his place once and shout out "[[Naruto LIGHTNING BLADE!]]" and thrust his arm upwards in his sleep. Then he muttered "Why didn't you die?" and became silent again. He told me about another time when his same friend shouted something else before waking up and asking if he just said that, but I don't remember what it was. * This troper's mother has been known to cuss in her sleep. One night she woke me up from the next room with a shouted F bomb and a few S grenades followed by chainsaw snoring. I asked her the next morning, "So, what were you dreaming about that you cussed for?". She claims she was having nice, happy dreams. * This troper once said "Butter is insoluable" in her sleep once. I was half awake, half asleep. ** She has also said "I don't know" out loud in her sleep. (ItMakesSenseInContext of the dream) * This troper, possibly due to his chronic sleeping problems and strange dreams, talks in his sleep. One gem in particular elicited a question about it the next morning from another attendant at a weeklong youth group retreat: "Unleash the quail." * This troper was once woken (in the afternoon) by his mother, who announced that she was leaving (don't remember where to). The following conversation went a bit like this: "Hmm...'kay...good luck with yer lesbian...escapades..." "...what?" "...nurrmind. *snore*" * This Troper and some friends were at a sleepover, when one of the others said "Thank you" in, and I quote "a tone as if she had just made a deal with the devil...[[LikeAsLikeAComma like,]] she wasn't happy or sad, just...pleased."(quoting a friend) * This Troper is an insomniac, and has to take a rather large dose of Trazadone in order to get him to go to sleep. However, after years on being on the medication, he has built up an immunity with....strange results when he resists or gets woken up during a deep sleep. One evening, he was going to bathe and had taken the knockout drug an hour beforehand. After the shower, he blacked out due to the humidity and the meds swinging in full force. About 2 hours after the knockout, his

parents came home and tried to open the door, which was locked. The mother yelled at him, but no answer came from the Troper. It took the father's ramming of the door to awaken the snoozing sod, only because the door whacked him across the head. His first words upon waking up and explaining what happened? "I was running!". Its been about 4 years and is STILL a family running-gag. ---(Wham!) Go back to [[Main/NonSequiturThud I Love Ice Cream Salad]]? ---<<|TroperTales|>> )

NonstandardCharacterDesign * Though it's written (I can't draw to save my life), most of my stories involving a Japanese character throws in some anime[=/=]manga sight gags and maybe some [[{{Bishonen}} attempts at making them unrealistically gorgeous]] [[{{Mukokuseki}} and white looking.]] Most of the other Asian characters (even if it's another normal-looking Japanese person) usually lampshade it. * [[MmmKay This troper]] surprises herself with the many different styles she can pull, especially with the same character. I've drawn [[{{Thunderbirds}} Scott Tracy]] for example as [[StylisticSuck a crude doodle-man]], [[MemeticMutation a Weegee-style freakazoid]], an {{Animesque}} SuperHero, and a surprisingly realistic portrait. Sometimes she has different styled characters interacting with each other, such as drawing [[PunchOut a semirealistic Narcis Prince]] with a [[DrSeuss Seussian doodle monster]]. Don't ask... * This Troper designed her one of her original characters for a project in the {{Team Fortress 2}} art style. He stands out VERY much in the cast picture, where everyone else is drawn in her usual {{Animesque}} style. * I often use stickmen in some of my comics, but sometimes well drawn, shaded people show up just to mess with people. Often also done with establishing shots. * I experimented with this idea, making some of my newer characters more realistic-looking than my older "creations", or going for a more cartoony approach for things that I had previously drawn to be lifelike, but they have gone through such a drastic ArtEvolution since then that now it entirely depends on the drawing whether they look [[OffModel out of place]] or not. That said, however, considering the sheer number of different characters I have came up with since my childhood, a few of them stick out no matter what. ---That stick figure sticks out of NonstandardCharacterDesign too much, compared to the buff men...

NonUniformUniform * [[@/{{Bisected8}} This troper]] recalls a guy from his primary school days who would wear a jumper with longer than usual sleeves,

chew holes in them and wear them like a pair of fingerless gloves. * [[{{Starscream}} My]] high school is kind of like this; we have an official uniform, but it's only mandatory on special occasions. Instead, here's our dress code (this is only the mandatory stuff, it is by no means the ''only'' clothing we are allowed to wear): must wear any combination of grey/black/brown/darkish green[[hottip:*:the shirt/jacket/pants anyway, I don't think accessories like scarves are subject to that rule)]], no distinct logos, nothing ridiculously skimpy or garish (say, open shoes[[hottip:*:during science subjects, sporting activities and such, anyway; it's not prohibited otherwise, but I certainly wouldn't be caught wearing those]], overexposing clothing, etc.) Thankfully, the students here are blessed with common sense, so as long as we exercise that and follow the general structure of the code, anything goes. Wearing a blank shirt, pants and sneakers is generally good enough here. * This Troper's school allowed three items of jewellery, which dropped to one during the last year cause we got a really strict teacher. She always wore 5 pieces of jewellery and wore bright coloured badges on her uniform. Teachers never really noticed what I wore, cause I was so quiet in class, but the noisier kids always got found out, even if they had less jewellery on than i did, or a shorter skirt, or had their top button undone. * This troper sees this a lot at her school. The general winter uniform rules are wear a red tie, blue and red checked skirt, shirt, and either jumper, vest or blazer appropriate for year level. Nothing is ever mentioned about style and length of skirt, style or pattern of tie, or colour of shirt. Unfortunately, on a more serious note, this trope resulted in senior hoodies being banned untill the end of the year at her school. * [[BarKey This Troper]] is in the military and tends to do subtle things to his uniform to be different such as wearing jump boots, rolling up his sleeves often, and using a tac vest and thigh holster instead of the standard issue duty belt. * This Troper's school had a uniform and rules against "large obvious jewelry", but nothing about gloves or hats. I took much delight in wearing cool hats, and occasionally mesh fingerless gloves. There was a minimum length for the skirt, but no maximum, so one student wore her skirt too ''long'', and wearing ball caps was a trend. * @/DesertDragon: I wear a uniform to work and formerly school (in Job Corps), and I like to pull off this trope with jewelry by wearing a choker necklace, a thick leather watch on one wrist, and two bracelets on the other. In taekwondo practice I wear the necklace (it doesn't dangle, so it's not in much danger of being snagged), but that's about it. * A friend of mine took this to extremes when we were still in school. While I went for a more conservative form of uniform customization(wearing so many badges on my tie the pattern was no longer visible, 21 by the end of 6th year.), he arrived on the first day of 5th year wearing a black shirt, a tie with the embroidered pattern picked out, beaten up converse, a variety of bracelets and chokers all with studs or spikes, a bracelet with two inch spikes being the pointiest and ripped black jeans held together with so many

safety pins they were practically chain-mail. he battled teachers for a year over this outfit, only relenting over the shirt colour and spikes long enough to be used as weapons. he was almost disqualified from an exam, because the invigilators thought he was hiding crib notes under the adornments covering his arms. Next year he modified his uniform to the same degree but in the opposite direction. On the first day of 6th year he arrived wearing a perfectly pressed suit, Italian leather ankle boots and his school tie. he then wore this for the rest of the year to mess with people's heads. * At my old school, they were pretty lenient on uniforms. Girls: shirt, ribbon/tie, blazer, skirt (with no specified length), and knee socks. Me? I showed up to school on the first day wearing {{Zettai Ryouki}}, striped socks, and knee-high Converse. * This troper has been trying to do this. He wears a [[{{Transsexual}} female uniform]] at a conservative school, thus he can't wear pants like he always does in formal events. Thankfully he's switching schools soon, and the next school allows girls to wear pants. * This troper's local middle school has a typical American uniform policy but he's never seen anyone come out of that school, or go to that school, wearing one. * [[{{Tropers/AFP}} This Troper]] is in the US Air Force, which is currently (early 2011) transitioning from woodland-pattern Battle Dress Uniforms to the new "Digital Tigerstripe" Airman Battle Uniforms. While he ''has'' aquired a full set of the uniforms, he tends to wear the older uniform, complete with polished black boots, whenever possible. And will continue to do so, until the uniforms are officially removed from service (coming soon, this fall!). The effect is that he is the ''only'' guy in his squadron who wears the old uniform. ---Click [[ILied here]] [[NonUniformUniform to go back to the main article.]]

Noob * [[TsundeRay This troper]] will forever be a {{Fighting Game}} noob. ** [[TacoNinja This one]] too. She is glad that she is not alone. Although she does reasonably well at SuperSmashBrothers. ** Same for me. I got [[BlazBlue BBCS]] at launch and to this day I haven't won a single match against a skilled player. *** Isn't BlazBlue one of the most complicated fighting games out there? If you're a general noob, why not start with something simpler (comparatively), like say Street Fighter? * [[Semi1337Troper This troper]]'s neighbor is a major noob in ''{{Super Smash Brothers}} Brawl''. Anytime he goes online with him, he constantly spams attacks with the fan. What's really offensive is that he's not doing it on purpose. He thinks he's playing well. * This troper's best friend roleplays with her, and said best friend is a noob. She doesn't even use capital I's. She's constantly breaking forum rules and should be glad I never use the Report button. * During a game of zombie master a section involved car batterys Some dick-shit named BORAT kept Taking one of the batterys and wouldnt let

go *TRANSLATOR ACTIVATED* He said "I dont know how to let go items" I lead Him into the 'Gen room to put the batterys in *TRANSLATOR ACTIVATED* "Red lights are bad, im not going in there" "Me: OH FOR THE LOVE OF [[{{Pokemon}} ARCEUS]]", next in a different map, He kept using a weapon that could Kill survivors and we kept telling him to stop [[{{Overlylonggag}} *TRANSLATOR ACTIVATED*]] "If the map designer gave it the ability to harm survivors [[{{Wallbanger}} why not use it to?]]. "Me: YOU USE IT TO KILL THE ZOMBIES YOU [[{{Clusterfbomb}} FUCK-HEADED FUCK-SHIT FUCK A DUCK FUCK]]" * my gave myself the screename of alexthenoob, why? who cares? its a made up word anyways,(this is the funnyest thing that happen'd, troll: hello noob (refering to someone who was dissagreeing with him) me(alexthenoob): what? do you need to call me to end your stupid argument? and then, he left * I like MapleStory but if there is one complaint I have, is that you can bee accused of being a {{Noob}} even if you aren't one ''just because your levels are a little low''. Nevermind that I use multiple characters for gameplay variety and storage needs and know my way around the game ''and'' can actually type correctly, I'm called a {{Noob}} just because I don't have hours each day to level grind. Heck, one time, a guy who was ''only one level higher than me'' called me a {{Noob}}; I ''still'' don't know what that was about. * Me: Let's play Street Fighter IV! I'll be Bison!!! -slideykick! -slideykick! -slideykick! -slideykick! -I WIN!!! Round 2: -Slideykic--WTF U JUMPKICKED ME? You suck! * This troper just isn't a good gamer in general, as she has problems with both spatial perception and hand-eye coordination, much to the ComedicSociopathy delight of her GamerChick sister. This troper can play {{Pokemon}}, and a few other games, but that's pretty much it. And never let her drink alcohol and play MetalGearSolid3... * This troper once played a couple rounds of Zombies on Black Ops with a pair of n00bs that were somehow playing much worse than she and her sister were. This included the usual of point/kill stealing, abandoning us when we needed help, and just being overall incompetant (often to the point where they'd completely fail to pay attention to their surroundings and go down every two seconds, forcing us both to stop what we were doing to rescue them). As annoying as this was, we wouldn't have minded so much (since we admit we're not the greatest players in the world either), if it weren't for the fact that eventually they sent us a message telling us that WE were the ones that sucked, just before we played a final round with them where my sister and I practically had to carry them through it. Just before leaving, they decided to go out the civil way by calling us both stupid bitches (though it's currently unknown if they were aware or not that we were both girls) and then rage quitting. * This troper has found a "DPS ghetto" in some games, especially after

running away from ''TeamFortress 2'' and getting into the former DOTA scummunity around LeagueOfLegends. I found that for some reason, people are always complaining about being "Forced" to tank or "Forced" to heal/support. There's that whole Queue stuff in ''WorldOfWarcraft'' where the tanks and healers RageQuit at the first sign of a wipe because they have a short queue time or where they act high and mighty because they're not DPS. I can't count how many times the tank has yelled at me to crowd-control a target that ''THEY ARE ATTACKING''. Well get the dots off and ''STOP HITTING THE TARGET''. Then I'll crowd control - if I'm trying to crowd-control a mob and you keep hitting them and breaking it, then I'm just wasting mana. one time someone was screaming because Shen and Kennen (me) were tanking because "You all want to play nothing but Assassins." The other three members of the team were Katarina, Akali, and Shaco. I've yet to encounter Sorakas that aren't bots, and have only seen Karma played ''once''. You wouldn't believe how often I've been called a "noob" for playing as a Pyro in ''TeamFortress 2'', or a "noob" for being a medic. Really, you're calling the person healing you a "noob"? Then sorry, go look for a Medkit or return to the base because I won't heal someone calling me a "noob" for not being a sniper, demoman, or spy like ''every single freaking person on the team''. I'm only a medic because there ''are none'' and you guys keep shouting "MEDIC" in vain. * This troper once had the opportunity to turn a noob's own tactics against him in SoulCalibur II at the arcade. This particular noob claimed to have "mastered" Maxi, when in point of fact he'd learned one or two combos and had found a way to endlessly chain them together. Given the slightest opening, he could catch you, then juggle you repeatedly in the same combo over and over and over. That he was interrupting people's attempts at playing Conquest Mode so he could beat them and then yelling trash-talk after winning made him extremely unpopular. So this troper found a way to beat him, challenging HIM instead and playing the noob's Maxi against my Raphael. As soon as round one started, Noob tried to start his endless combo, only to consistently walk into this troper's crouch+B sword attack. That's the only move this troper used against him, beat him without suffering a hit. Round two, this troper tried to mix it up with a leaping attack, only to get caught by the Noob, who sequenced into the endless combo. After beating this troper, the Noob shouted, "Yeah! What's my name, bitch!?" This troper just shook his head, and round three, returned right back to the crouch+B attack, and the Noob lost without getting close enough to start his combo. This troper then gave him a deadpan "Yeah. What's MY name, bitch?" The Noob ended up storming off in a huff, but this troper got a round of thank-yous from other players in the arcade for at least shutting him up. * This troper, to this website. She is hoping to learn, though. * This troper once watched some people doing a tutorial in a {{Spyro}} game. When a cutscene (or something similar came up, they skipped it. Unfortunately, it explained how to use a combo move that was required to complete the tutorial. I had to bail them out. ** He used to BE a noob at Pokemon, as his tactic in Pearl was 'overuse Empoleon and spam its powerful moves, turn Bibarel into a HM slave and only level up other Pokemon when your Empoleon is knocked

out because you never use healing items. ---hed bak to teh [[{{Noob}} maine paige]] n00b

NoodleImplements http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/noodle2.jpg [[caption-width:382:OK, that's my half of the list...And that's a ''[[DrivingStick gearshift lever]]'' folks, [[FreudWasRight get yer minds out of the gutter!]]]] ---* This troper and and her girlfriend once went into Wegmans supermarket and emerged with precisely the following: a bottle of wine, three Pink Lady apples, a jar of marshmallow topping and one solitary clove of garlic. It all made sense in context. On a more unnerving note, this troper currently works at a hardware store and recently saw a guy come up to her counter with an axe, a shovel and one other item which her mind has blocked so as to preserve her sanity. So yeeeeaahhhh... * [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Tropers/Squidage I ]] once had to get a microphone, Vaseline, a 30ft cord, and some packing pellets. No one ever got the joke, though. * Ever since this troper introduced his Friends to the wonders of Dead Rising 2, It has now become an in-joke between his friends talk about going to the store to get items such as [[BreadEggsMilkSquick "Bowie Knives, MMA Gloves, Duct tape" or "Kayak Paddle, Chainsaw, Duct Tape"]] Which has aroused many a bemused look or an strange comment by passers By. If anyone asks, [[ItMakesSenseInContext We Just tell them to get the Game.]] * This Troper's friend was buying gag gifts that represented the objects in the common theater warm-up that goes: "One hen, two ducks, three squawking geese, four limerick oysters, five corpulent porpoises, six pairs of revlon tweezers..." and so on. Most were not perfect portrayals, but he WAS able to buy the six pairs of revlon tweezers without a problem. However, seeing his pile of strange objects, the cashier said, "All right, I have to ask. What are the six tweezers for?" Without missing a beat, he responded, "One for every day of the week, obviously." When she told him there were seven days in the week, he looked horrified and said, "NOT ON THE SABBATH!" * ThisTroper recently posted a status update on Facebook reading: "Guys, I have a great idea. I just need a bear trap, a watermelon, 500 monkeys, some kerosene and a pack of condoms." ** The following day, this update was posted: "OK, I know last time didn't go well, but I have a better idea for this time. I'm just going to need some masking tape, a taxidermied duck, and three men with erectile dysfunction. Hopefully, no badgers will have to suffer this time." * This Troper was trying to cheer up a friend, which culminated with the line "I'll just whip up a quick remedy with a wolf hide, 7 jelly beans, a hawaiian shirt, half a tire and precicely three matches, one of which is waterproof." Worked beautifully.

* Upon being asked why his paper was late, This Troper replied, "Well we had to let the concoction simmer for three days and we had trouble restraining the gorilla." * This Troper, whenever he and his friends have to make a plan for something, is fond of saying things along the lines of: "Alright, to get back at our math prof for those lousy test scores, we're going to need a 10 pound bag of frozen peas, 3 Puerto Ricans, a live bison, a dirigible, a pair of blue jeans, some jumper cables, a power drill, two pillows and an abridged copy of Hamlet. Now get all that stuff and meet me in Prague in 46 hours" * This troper and his friends have a game based around this trope. Go to walmart or something similar and buy 3 random items and any form of birth control. The prize is the look of confusion from the cashier. ** [[ROBRAM89 This troper]] once went to Wal-Mart with his girlfriend and purchased only a large jug of apple juice and a home pregnancy test. She had no idea why I thought that was so funny. *** Before or after ''{{Juno}}'' ? ** This troper tried this idea out with a group of friends. With a box of Trojan Magnums, a small bottle of extra-virgin olive oil, a large bottle of Krazy glue, and a comment about fruit, he won by default, having made the cashier blush. ** For this troper, the combination of items that got the winning look was a jar of toy slime, a lollipop with an ''[[FreudWasRight interesting]]'' shape, and some toilet paper. The toilet paper was necessity; the other two things were just cool impulse buys. ** bash.org has some good examples ([[http://bash.org/?768409 http://bash.org/?768409]]). For this troper, the list is gardening manual-fertiliser-pot seeds. *** So does {{xkcd}} ([[http://xkcd.com/236/ http://xkcd.com/236/]]). *** Another great one [[http://www.xkcdb.com/?882 here]]. ** This troper's father was once asked to pick up some items and came back from the shops with a stick of mascara, a disposable camera and a bottle opener. ** This troper once went on a shopping trip that involved buying latex gloves, razor blades, scotch tape, multi-coloured permanent markers and a bottle of lube. A very large bottle of lube. ** This troper's father once went out to pick up a few things we needed around the house. These things just so happened to consist of petroleum jelly, painkillers, and hot sauce. ** There is a chain of budget supermarkets in Europe called Lidl which sell a different, limited range of non-food items every week. As a result, if you want it, you need to buy it NOW. Automatically qualifying for this trope... except that the checkout staff have seen it ''all'' before. ** This troper once checked out with a six-pack of hard lemonade, a thing of Reese's mini-peanut butter cups, a gun magazine, and a box of tampons. The clerk went PALE. *** This troper can't really see what's so odd about that. *** The implication, I think, was the juxtaposition of items indicating PMS (Chocolate, tampons) with alcohol and a gun magazine. ** On the other side of the counter, This Lurker worked at a gas station. I was doing some paperwork one day when two guys walked up to

the counter to purchase a box of condoms and three packages of breathmints. I rang them up, handed them their change and went back to paperwork. As they're about to walk out the door I hear one say, "oh my god!" I look up to see him rushing back to the counter with a please-believe-me look on his face and literally scream in my face...."WE'RE NOT GAY!". I hadn't even thought about it until that moment. ** This troper played a similar game while at uni- we'd go down to the 24hr supermarket after the pubs shut and buy up to 4 items, with a big dirty grin on our face as we did so. The person who got the biggest reaction from the cashier won free drinks the next night. The all-time winner was an extra-large tub of Vaseline, a pineapple, a box of female condoms and 4 feet of braided curtain cord. The best this Troper ever came up with was a small butternut squash, a bottle of Johnson's baby oil, a large claw-hammer and a copy of the Radio Times. To this day, I wonder what the lass at the checkout thought I was planning, but I got some very odd looks for several weeks after (important tip: don't try this at the same place you do your regular shopping). * [[{{A random person}} This troper]] had a friend who made a joke about this. He doesn't quite remember it, but it involved People Magazine. ** Interestingly enough, the above counts as a NoodleIncident in itself. * This troper had a friend in High School who, whenever somebody displeased her, would say "And all I need to get revenge is..." and name several random objects involved in the torture. She never did any of them, though. * This troper's mother once had a friend ask her to get him a mango, a bag of dirt, and a photo of a coyote. To this day, we still have no clue whatsoever what these entailed, other than "some kind of prank". Adding to the confusion was that the man apparently asked other people for other random things. ** Presumedly, the prank was "getting people to gather random things for him". * [[ManCalledTrue This troper]] used to frighten people who irritated him by staring at them for a second and then muttering random cooking instructions. * This troper knows of one writer of {{Aubrey-Maturin}} fanfic whose research caused her to type into Google a variety of random things such as "Scientific names for wombats," various terms to do with sailing, and "Was Governor Macquire's wife pretty?" She then commented, "If Google is recording my searches they must be going 'Huh?'" This troper has done similar in her time. ** If Google pays any attention to my searches, then I'm officially boned. I like searching for fanfiction where there isn't any, all right? *** You people haven't seen [[http://www.metacrawler.com/metacrawler/ws/SearchSpy/_iceUrlFlag=11?_ IceUrl=true MetaSpy]] ... * I once made a joke that in order to stop myself from going into a rage, I'd need a bag, bamboo, a sword, 3 grapes, and a lemon. I also

use the 3 grapes and a lemon a lot in other noodle implements jokes. ** The bag to breath into, the the sword to slash at the bamboo, and the lemon and grapes to make some sort of alcholic mixed drink. [[DontExplainTheJoke Not very noodle-implementy to me...]] *** Um, yeah, but what if the lemon and three grapes [[IfYouKnowWhatIMean don't go there?]] * CrazyPrepared situations can be interpreted as this * This Troper had an RP character who was a bit of a Sadist and loves making people squirm. Once they had a mook tied up and he said the following: "Okay, I suggest you talk now, before He (a {{Genius Bruiser}} with a rep for Badassery) comes back with the Rat, Spark Plugs, and he'll want your belt." The mook immediately squealed, and the aforementioned Genius Bruiser wasn't too thrilled. ** Another threat from the same character: "A copy of ''[[AynRand Atlas Shrugged]]'', some Vaseline, a bottle of minty mouthwash, and of course you" (you being the fellow being threatened). *** This troper was RPing with a group of friends, when we were confronted with a magic barrier. My character, who is in fact a mad philosopher, suggested the following. "I can break through, but I need to use my scythe, two live rams, one pound of salt, a large, morbidly obese orc, and most importantly, the severed head of an elf." It should be noted that the above plan actually worked. * This troper had a simple thought-game with friends where one would have to break into a castle with only one gate (with guards), utilising two or three very simple materials (a comb, a shoe, a cow etc). Virtually every [[ASimplePlan plan]] for entering the castle could be described this way. * This troper was once im-ing her bf's new boyfriend, and in an effort to freak him out, alluded to her last breakup involving, "Peaches and a screwdriver," and except to confirm she did not, in fact, mean the drink, refused to say any more on the subject because "it was just too horrible." * This troper likes to refer to the session where she permanently broke up with her first P&P RPG group as "the incident with the midget and the magic rope". * The more random components of my toolkit are a pack of Wrigley's doublemint, a few paperclips, four stubs of blackboard chalk, and a few springs taken from some dissected ballpoint pens. Oh, and don't forget the last 2 capsules of ant insecticide. * This troper's Wal-Mart receipt listed the following. Sleeping pills, dragon's blood incense, a 7/8" wooden dowel, a 3-ring binder, a USB drive, an ''Akira'' DVD, a deck of cards, and a toy bus. * This troper now wants to work at a Wal-Mart as a cashier [[IAlwaysWantedToSayThat just to say]] (upon seeing the list of unusual items) "Oh hey! I've done that before. Man, was that fun..." and see the confused (maybe disturbed, depending on the items) reactions. * Slightly off topic, but not by much: today at work, this troper was randomly talking about Law & Order with coworkers, when someone came by to re-stock spaghetti. A coworker blurted out "In the criminal justice system, sexually-based offenses involving noodles are considered especially heinous..."

* This troper frequently lists numerous random objects needed to do something. The list always includes duct tape, varying amounts or rabid squirrels, and a bucket of blue paint. * [[{{Dante668}} This troper]] once participated in a forum game called "Ask a Stupid Question, Get a Stupid Answer". The question was, "What is my roommate ''doing'' in there?!" The answer she suggested was, "I can't go into details, but it involves Vin Diesel, a jar of peanut butter, and the complete works of Duran Duran." * This troper once implemented a "tactic" to win a sports fest using a "soul-stealing" cookie box, randomly folded paper, eggs and a belt buckle. Obviously, there was no plan and this troper's team lost, but the confusion of the people this troper messed with is a memory he carries on to this day. * This troper frequently improvises utterly logical explosives and assorted devices from common household materials for a Hunter: The Vigil game. Needless to say, the other players are commonly scared spitless. Now let's see what I can make from drain cleaner, Vaseline, wax, and propane... * My girlfriend once did this. Buying a pistol and ammo from the gunstore (which she wanted anyway, because she collects them) sometimes got her odd looks. When she does this while chugging down three water bottles, "accidentally" bringing out a pregnancy test with her credit card, and asking to use the bathroom, the clerk nearly fainted. * Not sure if it counts, but a running gag in {{Raekuul}}'s Sailor Moon fanfiction is Tsukino Ikuko's fantasy involving a banana peel and disco. Not plugging for it, since you'd need a deviantArt membership to read it (and probably be over 18, too (relax, nothing explicit, all implicit)) and I'm the same name everywhere I go on the 'tubes. ** UPDATE: You can safely add two [[Main/HimechanNoRibon stuffed]] [[Main/{{Bleach}} lions]] and [[Main/SailorMoonAbridged five Krispy Kremes]] to that list. * [[ManWithoutABody I]] once saw "[[MemeticMutation Sean Turner]] once killed a rhino with a poxy cement, orange concentrate, and an electric cock ring," written on a bathroom wall. * ThisTroper's friend once had to go to Walmart late at night to get some duct tape. While he was there, the friends he was with had him pick up some stuff for them, too. When he went to ring up the pistol ammo, {{Playboy}}, condoms, handcuffs, a rag, bleach, and (of course) the duct tape, the female cashier (the only other person in the store; she'd seen him pull up in his red child molester-esque van) paled and was very, very quiet. He had to re-assure her it [[NotWhatItLooksLike wasn't what it looked like.]] * [[{{Delcan}} This troper's]] 4th Ed DungeonsAndDragons game has a RunningGag whenever we need to get information out of unwilling characters - the "Device." It's never been described in full, but the list of moving parts seems to get longer every time. ** UPDATE: It finally got used in the game... and the results were messy. Looking back at its design plans shows someone's been adding to them - the ink is still fresh. Those gerbils weren't in there before... or the lead pipe... or- oh god, oh god the ''swirly straw...''

** [[{{The Far Side}} Mr Thingy?]] ** Hey, we did that too! It was in a FinalFantasyX themed campaign. We called it "XXXX's friend" (name of player omitted to protect the innocent), and it was...something. At last count, it was a [[EverythingTryingToKillYou three-and-a-half-foot long phallic object covered in sandpaper, spikes and saw blades]] [[WallMaster that could emerge from any surface, at any time, if the DM was vexed]]. It saw far too much use... * This troper and his friends have discovered that you can commit all kinds of heresy with just a bible, a few well placed words, a ringtone, and a christian bookstore. No, neither of the atheists suggested this, it was the catholic. * This troper tends to say he'd rather do many things than X (where X is something unpleasant), and "one of them involves a goat, a condom, some lubricant and a whip". ** That's not random at all! Anyone can see that you're talking about having sadomasochistic sex with a goat. *** No, no. The goat ''watches''. * This troper once formulated a brilliant plan to make the clerk think she was old enough to buy a violent R18+ rated DVD using her student ID card, blu-tack, and a small amount of dirt. She had the bad luck to get the clerk who had seen her around before and knew she wasn't eighteen, so she couldn't even try it out. Instead she just rang her friend and got him to pretend to be her dad giving her permission. That worked. * This troper actually ''wants'' to cause a NoodleIncident for himself, perhaps one involving a camcorder, a (willing) HeroicAlbino (or EvilAlbino) [[{{ForeignPeopleAreSexy}} Dutch woman]], a condom, some lubricant, a copy of the Karma Sutra, a DVD player and an unwitting audience. * This troper once told someone that he could do horrible things to him involving a cheese grater, a spade, three cans of soup and an albino chimpanzee. * This troper called on this for improvisation exercises in Drama pretty regularly. I think the most memorable list came when we needed to get to the next town, ''pronto''. My exact words: "Easy. I just four gallons of water, twenty-six magnets, nine mufflers, forty-eight feet of high-conductivity wire, a propane canister, two pairs of jumper cables, a standard naval anchor chain, sixty-two sparklers, a baker's dozen Ghengis Khan firework packs, and an empty ten gallon ice cream container." * This troper plays with this trope on occasion, usually in the form of "it's amazing what you can do with a brick, three golden retrievers, the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders, and too much free time." The NoodleImplements vary, but the "too much free time joke" name endures. * When [[{{Smerf}} this]] troper was freshly moved into his current condo, he looked at the top of his dresser and started laughing. He had only three things on it: a box of latex gloves, a small jar of Vaseline and a roll of electrical tape. And a valid, mostly schoolrelated reason for each of them. * One of this troper's friends, when angered, would threaten to

torture someone with a pair of needle-nosed pliers, an accordion and three grapes. This troper once terrified everyone by suggesting a viable torture method that would utilize only these items (and some restraints, of course). * This troper once described a decent response to how they handled {{Deadpool}} in the ''Wolverine'' movie as involving "a sledgehammer, ten kilograms of blasting gelignite, and a duck." ** That actually sounds like something the real Deadpool would do. * A friend of [[Tropers/{{Smerf}} this]] troper will occasionally threaten people with neon signage and... unusual methods. * In a discussion of "how much would a night like this cost?", my response was "$8 in the right part of town, but I'd have to bring my own grommets." * This troper at one point was putting together a few ideas that he'd like to see in a ''Series/DoctorWho'' AbridgedSeries, and ended up envisioning this exchange (fusing NoodleIncident and NoodleImplements) in "The Doctor's Daughter": -->'''Soldier''': But how will we survive without the cloning vats?\\ '''Doctor''': Well, there's this thing called sex. I remember once \\ [SCENE MISSING]\\ '''Doctor''': And that's how her shoes ended up on the roof. Any questions?\\ '''Soldier''': Where did the potato peeler fit in?\\ '''Doctor''': I still have no idea. * This troper has a {{Running Gag}} in her senior Girl Scouts troop whenever planning a hazing: Always refer remind someone to "bring the cat food" in front of the hazee. * [[{{Kaizykat}} This Troper]] likes to mess with everyone and anyone. She updated her Facebook status with "Anyone have any idea where I can get a cat, five paperclips, a thing of superglue, diet coke, twist ties, cardstock, and an abridged copy of Tale of Two Cities by morning?" and is going to have much fun playing with people who try to figure it out. ** [[CountDorku This troper]] stole that. It resulted in a couple of cheap jokes, the best of which was: -->''I used to have a copy...they called it'' A Tale Of One City, ''though.'' ** [[{{TheWeirdo}} This Troper]] has a similar case. When he was in a specialization course talking to people, sometimes the sound of a power drill would drown out the conversation. He made sure he said "...with a copy of the Kama Sutra, 5 cans of whipped cream, 37 weasels and a leather strap." (or similars) when it ended. * This troper has made a particular claim, among others, of being able to produce a high-explosive with apple juice, formaldehyde, scented candles, Vaseline, and seltzer. While this troper is kidding about this recipe, most of his friends tend to treat his casual and joking grin with more than a few grains of salt. Possibly due to the troper's near-eidetic memory and having taken a look in the Cookbook once. * This Troper is fond of "Bring me five octopus tentacles, a Bunsen burner and a motorcycle helmet before the next full moon." * I have a plan in the event of a zombie apocalypse. All I need is a

drill, a crowbar, the Golden Jubilee and a painting of Michael Jackson. ** No seriously I thought this through. It should work. *** I want to see how this would work. ** Okay, I can see where the Michael Jackson painting comes in, but what good is the Golden Jubilee if you don't have any Wacom tablets, a bottle of white zinfandel, or the pilot for the live-action Aquaman show? *** You can do without them if you have a [[{{Pokemon}} Luxray]] handy, but you'll need a bucket of seedless grapes and a printer. * This tropers newest joke is placing 20 pounds (9 kg, for the metric world) of uncooked noodles, a puppy, 3 (yes, three. Don't ask why such a specific number) shark teeth, and a 5-foot (152 cm) piece of a large chain next to the victim while they are sleeping, and wait for them to wait up to see what happens. Don't even ask what I could do with this, because I made it up on the spot. * This troper knows how to destroy the world using only a [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Launch_loop launch loop]], a large number of electron guns, and a heck of a lot of [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cyclotron_radiation cyclotron radiation]]. ** You know, the SCPFoundation reported a missing Keter-class ApocalypseHow object a day after you posted that... * Two memorable examples for this Troper: ** A few times, when someone on {{Roblox}} asked me how a certain script worked in one of my places (usualy either [[CodeLyoko Roblox Lyoko]] or [[LittleBigPlanet LittleBigRoblox]]), I'd respond saying, "The script is really compicated, but it requires...", and then pick any five items from the Roblox Studio Object Browser, in random quantities. One of my favorites was "[=five of each kind of variable holder, two RocketPropulsions, ten LocalScripts, four FileMeshes, and the Debris Service=]". ** I was once telling some friends at school about a CrowningMomentOfFunny I had had on the internet just a few days earlier. Sensei overheard us and asked about it. I told her that it involved the aforementioned Roblox Studio program, a [[MarioKart Wii Wheel]], three songs from the ''{{LittleBigPlanet}}'' soundtrack, and the textbook for the class. One of my friends (possibly a fellow Troper!) said it sounded like a really great NoodleIncident, but asked why I didn't use screencaps from [[FourChan The Imageboard That Must Not Be Named]] instead of the Wii Wheel. The look on Sensei's face was priceless. (I never did find out what she said after hearing my explanation... Anyone know what "Noodle Incident" is in Japanese?) *** &#12492;&#12540;&#12489;&#12523;&#12398;&#20107;&#20214; * {{Quarma}} once told his friend that if he didn't get on AIM soon, he would do something that involved R-rated hugs, sonic accelerators, and tunics the size of golf club carriers. * {{Excel-2009}}. I find that if any of the above is questioned by anybody, it can be excused with a plaintive "[[YouDoNotWantToKnow You don't want to know]]". * A set that actually [[ItMakesSenseInContext Makes Sense In Context]]: At the start of today's meeting about an event on Friday,

the club president went out to her car, and came back with a box. The contents: One orange tablecloth, a wreath of brown-colored leaves, two origami bats, five tray-package things each of two different kinds of face paint, a preliminary copy of a brochure about the club, a picture-laden book about kabuki theater, and a set of keys that open [DATA EXPUNGED]. [[spoiler:Context: Prep stuff for Campus Awareness Day, where clubs make presentations to try and attract more members. The cloth, bats, and leaves were table decorations for our booth, the paint and book were for part of the costume component of the project, we needed 50 copies of the brochure to hand out to people at the booth, and the keys were actually for the [REDACTED].]] Pity that we never found the club sword (just a plastic prop that disappeared over Summer Quarter), because it would've been a great decoration. ** You visit the {{SCP Foundation}} a lot, don't you? * Subverted in that ThisTroper found out their purposes pretty quickly, but I recently attended my first screening of ''TheRockyHorrorPictureShow'', and, well, I was a bit confused as to what I could possibly need to do with a cowbell, a squirt gun, a noisemaker, cards, etc. * Recently I went to Target and bought a few things: A pack of gum, a slinky and a DVD boxest of Pokemon... I'm suprised that the clerk didn't give me funny looks. ** That;s because all Target clerks are dead inside, just a little bit. You could purchase pregnancy tests, personal lubricants, orange juice, packing tape, handcuffs, and a whip, and they don't bat an eye. Speaking from experience. * [[{{Nightboomfer}} This little troper]] recently returned from a shopping trip at Target involving panties, an electric razor, a voice changer helmet, some duct tape, and a large amount of pasta with no sauce. Ok yeah, i actually needed the pasta, tape, and the razor. * [[{{LuckeySteve}} My]] first successful (if you can call it that) P&P campaign (BESM to be exact) ended in an incident involving a Bass guitar, a scrap of paper, 600 ravens, an army of dragons,a great amount of recently removed eyeballs, 1 very badly thrown knife, and a restrained, VERY pissed off newly awakened Fire Mage. * This troper got some strange looks from her housemates after disappearing into the bathroom equipped with clingfilm, Vaseline and sellotape. And staying there for twenty minutes swearing occasionally. (She was changing the dressing on a new and somewhat difficult-toreach tattoo.) * When [[TheTallOne I]] type up lab reports for science class, I do occasionally get interesting lists. My most memorable supply list called for thirty fifteen year-old girls, a camcorder, 2 weeks, and a beaker, among other things. ** 30 girls 1 beaker? *** [[{{Xkcd}} 3frenchhens2turtledoves1cup]]. * One boring summer morning in the kitchen, [[{{MiraShio}} I]] randomly said this in my head: "We've been stuck out here for three days with nothing but a can of tuna and a pair of socks!" * [[GamerFromJump My]] brother is a great electrician, but practically AntiMagic when it comes to computers. His network went down during a family visit, so I volunteered to take a look. After poking around the

router and the settings menu, I told him, "Sure, I can fix it. I'll need 12 feet of Cat 5, a roll of [[DuctTapeForEverything duct tape]], a staple gun, 3 paperclips, my laptop, a 6-foot wooden dowel, some peanut butter, and a rat. Oh, and my iPod." Cue his O_o look and dad and sister-in-law laughing in the next room. Him: "You are so weird." * This troper on Gaia Online answers the odd questions (and not so odd) usually with the following: "Well there was that one time with a unicycle, 10 litres of paint, glitter, a trained bear, 2 zucchinis, 5 road flares, a bearded lady, a kazoo, a ladder and a spork, but I don't like to talk about it." ** I have also used: "Well there was that one time with six gallons of paint, glitter, two zucchinis, a trained mule, a sailor uniform, a bullhorn, 5 flares, a bearded lady, and a spork. But, I don't like to talk about it." * I killed a fly with an electric pencil sharpener once. [[spoiler:By using it as a makeshift fly swatter.]] ** That's not what [[FamilyUnfriendlyDeath I]] [[NightmareFuel was thinking]] * In a forum post, I once had the illegitimate grandson of Rufus T. Firefly could inherit his grandfather's throne, provided he earned it. He did so with the aid of accomplices, and "an incredibly elaborate scheme involving a zeppelin, a truckload of hamsters, a Bob Hope album and the entire 1993 line-up of the New York Knicks." * This Troper once went to a supermarket counter with one of those long, coiled sausages, vaseline, and condoms. The cashier actually called over another cashier on break to look at me. * I recently walked past my brother and his girlfriend on my way out carrying two belts, two bowls, a bottle of water, and the keys to my car. "T'll explain later," I said. [[spoiler: I was helping my dad rescue a couple of thirsty stray dogs. The belts were to be used as leashes, but the owner was found before I got there.]] * A length of plastic tubing formerly employed on a pool pump, a novelty plastic mug, two butter knives, then a wooden chair, and then a laundry basket, a large plastic bowl with a lid, a hair dryer and finally, a toilet plunger. [[spoiler: To unplug the bathroom sink, but it's the chair that got the most attention.]] * One of my few friends in a writing class, when I was crying (He was a senior, so it was his last day) told me he would implement a plan involving "... {Teacher} , a banana, at least four costume changes, a tassel, several objects with bedecked with rhinestones, a screwdriver, a copy of Its A Wonderful Life, a long blue feather, and the London Philharmonic Orchestra." * As much as [[Tropers/SoWeAteThem I]] like to joke about this, we actually did get ourselves in a situation involving a gas lighter, a 3/8" drillbit, a can of hairspray, a sack of potatoes, three pairs of safety goggles, industrial strength glue, and several bits and pieces of ABS plastic. [[spoiler:Spud gun.]] * This troper can guarantee that there is no actual reason for smuggling [[http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/unleashed/2010/06/malaysiatortoises.html 301 tortoises and four and a half pounds of cannabis]] into Malaysia that can possibly be better than the one you just

thought of, whatever it might have been. * I did this for lulz on FaceBook. This is what I said: "Lol guys, I have a REALLLLY funny idea. But I'm gonna need a pack of grapes, a slingshot, a small electric motor, duct tape, a bottle of wine and 5 cloves of garlic. Oh and this has to be done at 5 AM or the bats might ruin the plan." * I posted on a friend's Facebook wall, "I have a movie idea that I want your help with. We'll need your house, two other actors, a camera operator, a baseball bat, the giant chicken costume from church and maybe two hours." * School projects lend themselves to this pretty easily. Me and two friends once found ourselves needing the following for a health assignment: a video camera, a tripod, one latex glove, scissors, fake blood, several Q-tips, a few cotton balls, ketchup, string cheese, a tortilla, a card table, a bottle of V-8, two electric blenders, shampoo, a cheese grater, a fork, a knife, and an apple. This was all necessary and directly related to the assignment. I'll let you try to figure it out. ** A movie about a murder at a restaurant? * My friend's pit bull actually managed to do this once. My friend and I were discussing how she should break up with her boyfriend without hurting his feelings. Sarcastically, she asked her dog what he thought she should do. [[CrowningMomentOfFunny He left the room and came back with a large wooden spoon.]] How he expected us to use it is anyone's guess. ** [[CutHisHeartOutWithASpoon Cut out his heart,]] perhaps? * This Tropette, out of boredom once posted "Anyone know where I can get several five-gallon buckets of golfballs with no questions asked?" on Facebook. The scary part was that most people were quite helpful, and a few even offered to give me some of their golfballs. Only my older brother thought to ask what I was up to, probably [[GenreSavvy because he knows me too well.]] * At the hotel I work at, we once had a couple of people check in for a couple of hours and then left. I went up to see if they destroyed the room. I came back down and told my housekeeping supervisor, "Nothing's wrong. Just a bunch of wet towels in the bathroom and a can of whip cream." She had a shocked look on her face. * One summer day back in High School, a friend once called my house and requested that my sister and I meet him on top of a nearby hill and bring a pair of spoons, with no further information given... As it turned out, the plan was [[spoiler: to eat hoodsie cups with him, chat, and enjoy the view]]. * This troper, while sitting in the commons room of her school the other day, overheard a classmate talking on his cell phone: "Yeah, this'll be awesome! ... No, you have to get the cheap-ass condoms. ... So they'll pop when we put the cream cheese in 'em! ... I've got the nails, do you have a hammer? ... Great! Now just remember to buy some cream cheese and we'll be in business." * This [[Tropers/{{Godzillawolf}} Troper]] has been in Destination Imagination, and if you've ever been a member, you will know how to make ANYTHING out of the strangest things, like a model tower out of string, coffee filters, toothpicks, and bending straws.

* [[Tropers/KatanaCat I]] posted this on my FaceBook wall: "Guys, I just had an awesome idea. I'll need 10 gallons of soy milk, three bags of potato chips, five pairs of headphones, a DVD of Aladdin, some yarn, five pounds of birdseed, some root beer, a printer, some photos of hyenas, a GameBoy Advance, and a copy of Mr. Nutz. Oh, yeah, and some two meter by two meter squares of origami paper, a nine-inch square of florist's foil, and some red paint." I only had intended to use the last two items. I would use the paint to paint a piece of paper red, and then use the red paper and the florist's foil to fold an origami dragon that spits paper fire. What? I like origami! And it's a real model, too. It would probably take forever to fold, though. ** After posting that, she had a very interesting conversation which started with "What are you making?", where she had to explain that all she wanted to make was confusion. One little gem was a post that her already-informed mother made just to be entertaining: "I can happily supply the photos of hyenas... ...but you can NOT have any of my delicious organic potato chips for any enterprise involving soy milk. :/ That's just *wrong*. ;P Oh, and as far as Aladdin goes -- will a VHS tape work? Or perhaps a wax cylinder for your Victrola?" *** Just changed it to this: "Last time didn't work, but I got another idea. I'll need five boxes of Amazon Frosted Flakes, two liters of ice cream (either blueberry or vanilla will work), the GBA from the last post, a copy of the GBA port of Rampage, some soy sauce, a whole lot of duct tape, two thousand butterflies, two thousand small Mylar streamers in various colors, a toddler-sized wetsuit, Britney Spears' left shoe, and some glue." It was going to also include a purple tutu, a thousand ants, a thousand ant-sized saddles, and some of those letter magnets, but it was too long. Parents helped out with picking the items this time. * This Troper just now saw some college students get into an elevator with a chair, a trash can, a potted plant, and ''a rubber life raft''. When this troper asked what they planned to do with them, they simply said "don't worry about it"... * Anytime anyone asks this troper if they need anything, my standard response is usually "A plane ticket to Cuba, a Taiwanese midget, and $6 million in unmarked bills." ** Additionally, one night my friends and I were bored and went to Wal-Mart to buy some board games. One of the guys in the group kindly decided to pick up the bill, in addition to getting himself some things. His final inventory at the register was as follows: Scrabble, duct tape, a six pack of beer, and some condoms. The checkout lady gave him a ''very'' strange look. * While talking about whether or not my college would be having a Halloween dance, My mother asked what I'd wear as a costume. I shrugged and said "I have an idea, but I'll need [[ShoutOut a suit, a see-through raincoat, and an axe]]." I offered no context. * This troper's poorly ventilated apartment lacks internet access, so every time he needs to make a [=PowerPoint=] presentation, whenever he goes to a cyber cafe/relative's house he search for pictures that are somehow related to the topic, save them to his USB, and make a presentation with them. It usually works very well.

* A girl that this troper knows is currently implying one of these. So far, I have NO idea what she's talking about but it involves thongs, interviews, potentially going to Vegas, sports bras, kiddie cocktails, two cities near here, learning how to walk in high heels, and the letters JRIPPOP. * this troper once saw a comment for magical girl lyrical Nanoha episode seven, complaining about fate's mum reading: That bitch! Thats it! Bring my vaseline, a banana, and&#65279; some duct tape! And we'll get this shit rollin'! Here's the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ba8v4ELg3vM&NR=1 * This troper had several occasions of using NoodleImplements to solve a few problems. His most memorable one involved helping a friend whose car kept stalling because the battery was running flat. First he used an extension cord, then when that didn't help, he used rope. [[spoiler: Actually the help he was giving was towing the friends car using his own - because he didn't have a towing cable, he first tried the said extension cord which was lying around in the trunk, but it kept breaking. Then this gas station had a spare piece of rope lying around and was generous enough to give it to us for use.]] ** When this troper got his new Nokia N97 cellphone, everyone in the office was wondering why it had a piece of velcro on the back. [[spoiler: it was to have a place where a Stylus for the touchscreen, wrapped in the other piece of velcro, could be stuck to when not in use.]] * This Troper has the Google Toolbar, and searching on ThisVeryWiki will add what I searched on here to Recent, resulting in such things as Sword, Breach, Screw a goat, Incest, satan, arson, smile and Noodle winding up on the "recent search" section. * This Troper uses this trope as a yearly tradition for his Christmas gift suggestions. You see, my family doesn't really know each other, so we write a yearly list of gift suggestions and do a secret Santa thing. Of course, I have to populate my list with HILARITY. This year's list for example featured... ** - The Octopus I didn't get last year (running gag) ** - 5 Kg of Aluminum dust, 3 Kg of Iron Oxide ** -A nice hat ** - A rottweiler ** -A drill * Among others. Sadly, I never got my Octopus :( * This troper brought the usual supplies for a weekend alone with a woman of significance. Also a bike lock. [[hottip:+:I keep it in that bag.]] * This Troper was once asked on facebook to name five things which, if bought together, would make the shopkeeper wonder about her. Her response? "Fluffy handcuffs, a bowler hat, cat toys, brownie mix, and a very big jar of mayonaise". * This troper's friend Mike [claims to have] won a couples' skating contest with a [[CargoShip STUFFED TOY AS HIS PARTNER.]] * Some of my classmates walked in saying: "And then we'll all dress up like animals." "Yeah, I'll bring the Russian bear on a motorcycle." It probably MakesSenseInContext... but how? * I once posted to a friend's DeviantArt profile that we would need 50

bottles of mustard, a cow, a purple helicopter, two car wheels, a few cans of beer and a waffle iron. Oh, and preferably before next week. ** Also, I told a friend "Well, that glass has done lots of things here in this room... let's just say the last time, it took a while to get the horses out." * [[Tropers/DaPatman This Troper]] once took part in a one-shot RP set in the SCPFoundation in which he aquired [[http://scpwiki.wikidot.com/scp-050 SCP-050]] using [[http://scpwiki.wikidot.com/scp-826 SCP-826]], a copy of MachineOfDeath, a paddling pool, and some black food colouring. * Conversation with a friend: ---> Me: Hey, I have an awesome idea! We just need some spoons of cinnamon, a green chair, a can of Sprite from 2005, two cows and a toaster. Don't worry about the bears, we'll get past them with peach juice, a helicopter and a Hello Kitty chainsaw. ---> Friend: Without bringing bottle jam? aww, that sucks handbaggage! ---> Me: Sorry, I've done some research and found out it's best to leave it at home. But you can bring the flower-shaped sponges, the hammer and the Wikileaks documents, if you want. In fact, I think they can be very useful here. ---> Friend: By here, you mean the super-effective retarded handsome cockpit? I do think leaving it at home would be the most sufficient way to do it in. * Anyone who looks up what I've been searching online [[ItsForABook for researching a story I've been writing]] is going to spend the rest of their lives wondering what I've been planning. Among my searches are low-yield thermonuclear weapons delivery, the culture of the Australian aborigines, the approximate cost of an AK-47, xenopsychology, images of the Replica from FirstEncounterAssaultRecon, Antarctic weather, the Soviet moon-launch program, VX gas, the cultural acceptance of lesbianism in Ohio, sleeping bags rated to -10 degrees Fahrenheit, the square-cube rule, Russian last names, ministerial government, the Hague Convention, Objectivism, methods of execution, Australian food, how to say "Pizza Bites" in Vietnamese, and a Google Images search for World War I battlefields. * I'm still waiting for someone to ask me why I keep a flashlight in my bag, so that I can respond with the 100% truthful statement that "It's a long story involving a webcam, the SlenderMan, and an old video game, [[{{Airplane}} but that's not important right now.]]" Sadly, a flashlight apparently isn't too weird of a thing to be carrying around, since nobody's ever asked... * This troper likes to joke about that he could make a bomb with "some gasoline, and less than 20 bucks (or some capacitors, a coil, a transformer, a 9v battery and some wires if i feel that being more especific about it will make it funnier)" in his defense he REALLY means it, being from a technical school. And with his friends in the form of "GIMME 3 VOLTS!", "superconductivity" and "connect it to ground" as mysterious solution to everything * One day for school, I had to bring dental floss, some marbles, and a lego man named Bilbo. No, I won't go into it. * [[@/{{Seiryu}} This troper]] likes to do these on occasion on

Facebook statuses for fun. ** On April Fool's day, I posted a status stating that I had an excellent prank ready to go, which involved raccoons, a zeppelin, and a bathtub full of toothpaste. Cue 20+ people commenting "Oh dear God..." ** In the middle of a month-long battle of the sexes in this group I'm a part of on campus, I posted my supply list. -->Felt tip markers &#10003;. Sunglasses &#10003;. Smoke bombs &#10003;. Ninja uniform &#10003;. Sumo wrestler costume &#10003;. Pie &#10003;. Quail &#10003;. Zeppelin &#10003;. Blowtorch &#10003;. Feather boa &#10003;. Stuffed giraffe &#10003;. Snorkel &#10003;. [[TheDresdenFiles Holy water balloons.]] &#10003;. Zucchini &#10003;. Post-it notes &#10003;. Be afraid, girls. *** Cue 50+ girls going "[[FlatWhat What.]]" * This troper was walking around campus one day when he heard a girl telling a story where someone had dumped a bunch of party hats, some bags of flour and confetti on the table and asked "are you going to talk?" * The same troper as above once had an English project where he needed to bring in a wooden platter, some nuts (as in tools, not edible nuts) and chopsticks to class. * Not sure if this really counts since we know what the end product is supposed to do, but a few days ago, in some school event, we had to get in groups and build a device to launch a cotton ball using a ruler, a few rubber bands, masking tape, a piece of paper, a plastic spoon, a paper cup, and a tack. * This troper used to play a game where Noodle Impliments were used in a situation for various and sundry things (eg "You are currently falling out of the sky, You have: a rubber panda, a caterpillar, six feet of duct tape, a spoon, [[BrickJoke Beethoven's Ninth Symphony and a New York strip steak.]] Eating the steak usually gave you superpowers of some sort and the symphony was highly explosive. So much better than learning math. * A tan-colored men's coat, some wire, a blonde wig, hair gel, a plush polar bear, a pair of glasses, pants, straps from an old purse, a sports bra, and some glue. Try to guess? * "Well, I've got an umbrella, six pens, a hand fan, two shoehorns, the bag full of flower petals and the chicken salad, so you just need to get the catnip and a screwdriver and we're good to go." * While playing Scribblenauts, I caused a game glitch using the following: a pair of wings, a set of scuba-diving equipment, a shrink ray and a lake. * This troper once purchased a case of beer, a machete, a roll of duct tape, and a ski mask. Just to screw with the cashier. * On one occasion I bought the following items from the store: six disposable aluminum roasting pans, six disposable aluminum pizza pans, twenty-four very small cans of sliced olives, and a huge variety and quantity of candy. These were all for the purpose of making ginger bread houses (the pizza pans were to put the houses on and to cans of olives were to suspend the pizza pans in the roasting pans which were to be filled with water to prevent ants from getting to them). * Upon reading [[http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1150

this]] QuestionableContent, this troper's first thought was that the second panel would make a great set of NoodleImplements: "A family pack of toilet paper, a copy of ''WarAndPeace'', and a gun with a single bullet". ---Go back to Main/NoodleImplements. Don't forget to bring Vaseline, a remote control, a copy of the ''Auto Hunter'', a skateboard wheel, two cans of spray cheese (Extra Sharp Cheddar flavor), a pregnancy test, a photo of the current First Lady, bumper stickers from both [=McCain=] and Obama's Presidential campaigns, a tail feather from a ring-necked pheasant, and some shaving cream. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NoodleIncident ---* Do not attempt to ask This Troper about the school carnival last year. It involved bounce houses, water from the drinking fountain, massive amounts of cotton candy, a Lady Gaga medley, and crying over a ferris wheel ride. Also, if you ask me about the rave dance the school had, I will tell you that it was a horrible dance involving pretzels, brownies, cookies, Guitar Hero, punk rockers, douche bags who wouldn't leave her alone, the Dropkick Murphys song "The State of Massachusetts", a pat-down, balloons, and humiliation at DDR. * The time I crashed into a puddle is my favourite one and when asked about it all I will say is "It was deceptively deep" ** Has anyone ever responded to that with, [[ThatsWhatSheSaid well...]]? * [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Tropers/The1337 This troper]] swears he remembers reading a strip related to the original Noodle Incident. According to it, it happened during [[spoiler:show and tell]] and it involved a relationship between [[spoiler:spaghetti, the appearance of the brain, and the phrase use your noodle.]] ** There ''is'' one strip where Calvin must do an assignment about the brain which includes the use of a model, and his solution is to [[spoiler:put some cooked spaghetti in a paper bag and pass it off as brains.]] * This Troper has an incident only involving himself, which he has told to his immediate family, two people in his high school homeroom, and the people in his Session of a Homestuck RP. The Incident is known as "The Time I Almost Got Ran Over By A Train". It involved the walk to an anime club, and that's about it. Oh, and a train! * [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Tropers/Squidage This troper]] has an incident involving her mom, a evil packing box, and cleaning the garage. The world may never know. * Never will you know about the "Incident". Sufficient to say it involved a basket, a broken monitor, a lamp, several holes in the wall, a sword, a threat to call 911, several bags of mulch, two clothespins, and one very uncomfortable car ride. ** ...A sword? o_O Now i want to know... * This troper knows a girl who, when told a key phrase, will shout

"THERE'S A STORY BEHIND THAT!!!" What the story is remains unknown. * This troper. "That time at the place behind the house." It involved lighters, a styrofoam cup, purple hair dye, three cellphones, some alcohol, a snake, and plastic wrap. Or, "The Pool," with again alcohol, lighters, pool noodles, marshmallows, balloons, and some very singed hair. * My English Teacher from senior year loved telling stories about his younger years. One of which was when he used to work at Blockbuster Video. He states that all movies shown on the TV had to be PG and under after the "PulpFiction Incident." * Never ask This Troper about the famous/infamous Barbecued Soup Incident. All I will say is that it involved [[NoodleImplements a can of potato soup, a propane barbecue, a power drill, two extension cords, a rubber band, a condom, an open window and one very unfortunate passing seagull]]. ** ...Where does the condom come in at? 0_o * boggle* * Well, there was the Marshmallow incident in 6th grade... that was awkward indeed... * [[Tropers/DarkInsanity13 This troper's]] brother once referred to how his friends were all afraid of Frosted Flakes. He refused to explain the incident as to how this came into effect. * [[Tropers/FreezairForALimitedTime This troper]] and her best friend have the "can of chili" incident. We actually ''have'' told the story before, but we got so sick of telling it to people, we now simply refer to it in passing. Those who know us laugh... and everyone else wonders what's so funny about [[NoodleImplements a can of chili, a wrench, a hammer, and a Swiss Army knife.]] ** Didn't you explain this on the forum? You and your friend were trying to open up a can of chili because one night you two were hanging out and got hungry, but the thing was difficult to open because the can opener didn't work. So you guys went through a bunch of different tools, and finally your friend decided to get a hammer, which you thought was a joke and only later realized that he was serious, but the hammer still didn't work, only succeeding in getting chili on your clothes. Then finally your parents got home and opened it for you? Yeah, sometimes {{Noodle Incident}}s can be [[DontExplainTheJoke ruined.]] *** Exactly. That's why we downgraded it from "funny story" to NoodleIncident--to stop its degredation further. * [[{{Tropers/Katsuhagi}} This troper]] and her father occasionally reference "The Kitchen Scale Incident", which involved a particularly badly received gift. * This troper likes to tell people "Once, I threw up on a stripper's shoes". The questions that follow are many and varied. ** That seems reasonably self-explanatory. Alcohol-serving strip club, I'd assume. Perhaps involving being a lightweight, as to not have gotten cut off. That or food poisoning. *** Yeah, but why was the stripper wearing ''shoes''? **** Depending on the club, expecting a stripper to walk around barefoot is a little silly. Also, platform shoes are popular with strippers. **** Ever heard the phrase "stripper heels"?

* Doesn't it stop being a NoodleIncident as soon as there's an actual story behind it? This troper had a Berry-Berry Kix incident that started with vague claims of the psychoactive effects of Red #4, but eventually mutated into a series of stories after friends started bringing it to parties, concerts, clubs. Good times. ** Every NoodleIncident has a story behind it. You just don't know (and likely aren't supposed to know) what it is. * This troper's church youth group has what is known as "the [=CiCi=]'s incident." Troper will not allow them to discuss it, and any allusions to said incident are immediately shushed. Our youth group has The kyle incident. Well lets just say it involved a bit of accidentall innuendo over a 3 minuite period and many reppressed laughs keep in mind he is 2 years older than me (I'm 12)he thought it ment dummy guess the word just guess. * this troper has caused her friend an insane fear of large cardboard boxes. So much so, when her mother had one she flipped out, checked to make sure she wasn't in her pajamas and then after much aloud debating (yes no, what ifs etc) opened the empty box. Much to the confusion of her mother and a statement that she needed dinner. Especially so she was sad it WAS empty. * Nobody this troper told ever found out what her "tragic accident involving an elevator and a turkey sandwich" was. ....because there wasn't one, of course. * Most of the accusations that this troper and her two best friends are in a three-way relationship (which we are NOT, for the millionth time) sprang from this one sleepover on New Years' that involved us, a futon, an energetic dog, and the host's father walking into the room at about six in the morning. And no, you pervs, we were asleep except for the dog that was licking this troper's face. * A common line between this troper and his buddy: "[[SuperSmashBros remember that time we killed]] [[TheScrappy the nintendog]]?" ** Please share with us, I hate that thing as much as Mr. Resetti. *** We still don't know how exactly it occurred, save that it was on the Bridge of Edlin. We ''think'' what happened was the Nintendog was standing on the a bridge piece just milliseconds before it was destroyed, meaning it fell off the screen before it could teleport to attack the camera. [[NoPlansNoPrototypeNoBackup We have yet to replicate it, however, despite attempts]]. *** I wonder if Resetti could be destroyed that way... or maybe by a Final Smash? >:D * One of [[{{Tropers/PictureFrame}} this troper's]] brothers refers to an incident where he slept under the pool table at a friends house, but won't explain it. * In this troper's fanfics, no matter what fiction, there is a running gag of some unnamed NoodleIncident event that usually involves a string of odd events capped with "the bizarre and horrific circumstances behind the invention of the frozen-pudding-on-a-stick, the details of which are classified Top Secret by the United Nations." * This troper likes to make vague mention of an NoodleIncident in his fics as well (and in his original writing, for that matter), all having something to do with something unspeakable that happened prior to the events in Prague (with lines like "is this going to be anything

like Prague?", "it's going to be Prague all over again", or "you don't remember why we can never go back to Prague, do you?"). Troper doesn't know why her picked Prague, although he has a [[AcceptableTargets hunch]]... * This troper has a friend that loves thes and immediately adapts to her noodle incident lead ins: --> '''Me:''' Dude! You know what we should do--> '''Friend:''' NO. You ''know'' what happened the last time you did that. --> '''Me:''' ... Bu--> '''Friend:''' NO. --> '''Me:''' I promise I won't set anything on fire this time! --> And: --> '''Friend:''' We should totally go to the balcony and--> '''Me:''' NO. NEVER AGAIN. * One of this troper's TeamFortress2 fanfictions has one. The Scout complains that the preceding events have been "their stupidest misadventure ever." The Engineer asks if it's stupider than the time they were vacationing in Las Vegas. No further explanation is given, but the Scout declares that the former story is indeed stupider than the Vegas Incident. * This troper's D&D group has a strange twist on this. We started a campaign in medias res, with the conceit that we'd all been hit by an uber spell that made us forget our adventures up to that point. The DM gave us each a list of things we remember, and odds and ends in our pockets to give us clues as to what we were questing for. Some things didn't quite link to the main plot though... -->Most of us had seen each other naked. -->Some of us remembered that Dwarven holy water was alcoholic. -->There was a list in my Drow's pocket titled "Places the Humans Have Got Us Banned From" with "Temple of Moradin" written in all caps and triple underlined. ** This squeamish troper [[{{Squick}} sincerely wishes]] that they couldn't come up with [[IfYouKnowWhatIMean an explanation...]] Did you figure out what really happened? *** We still haven't figured out what happened, but we figure these things are linked, and we're not sure we want to know why. * The green-vomit incident. My housemates won't explain further. * This troper occasionally gets mail from the government, due to random things that are normal in Israel. Whenever he gets one, he says "Oh shit they found out about the cats." This has gotten to the point where his mother brought home a letter and said "The cats are pissed." * Mention "Kara's 24th Birthday" to [[{{Tropers/Night}} This Troper]]'s friends. No one will admit anything, beyond the fact that it ended with Kara demanding, and getting, everyone's cameras to erase the onboard memory. * Please don't ask about the New Year's Incident. Just... don't. * A comic this Troper writes has one. A character will say something to the lines of, "I wish we had a stove..." to which the main character responds "I said I was sorry!" No details necessary. ** I have a real-life version of that. "MAN, I sure wish I had some SUPER GLUE. That SURE would be NICE, wouldn't it?" "I SAID I WAS

SORRY!" At that point though, I was really only acting annoyed for laughs. * All me and my friend have to say about ours is "It had cherries in it! Oh god!" Speculation abounds. * Apparently This Troper's father did something with a red turban on Karaoke Night. * This troper will start laughing if someone mentions either Asatru and/or Christian Evangelists. ** With an EvilLaugh, I hope. * This troper's college roommate was prone to talking in her sleep. She was convinced that what she said was this---that she said spectacularly embarrassing things that I kept secret for my own amusement. The truth, of course, is that my brain stops working pretty thoroughly by about midnight, and I honestly couldn't ''remember'' what she'd said the next morning. * This troper has been known to make these up when talking to friends. Generally the overall implication is murder. ** This Troper's the same way. It's pretty much become a game now, one person mentions an obscure or distant region or place(Kamchatka and Somalia come up rather frequently), and the other builds off of it with a what happened there, in vague terms. * This troper has heard of the famed "General MacArthur" speech made by his roommate's friend about a NASCAR race during a road trip. Details are almost nonexistent, and yes, there are no mistakes in that last sentence. * [[{{Tropers/Magus}} This troper]] often says something akin to "I deny all allegations about the Chuck E. Cheez incident". [[spoiler: It's made up.]] * In college, this troper had some...interesting friends. Some completely innocent actions led to this: My female friend comes down from her dorm room and stops to talk to my male friend in the lobby. I say, "Oh! You took off his pants." She says, "Yeah, I didn't think they were quite right for Mass." and walks out the door. As the door closes, the other girl in the lobby says, "She took off his PANTS??" It had not been until that moment that I realized what I'd said sounded wrong. Since this happened freshman year, this became an oftreferred to NoodleIncident, as well as the 4-layered explaination that had followed. * This troper remembers with an odd fondness the time with the marshmallows, the dimension-bending fog, the fire that couldn't be put out with water and the long session of praying to the moon god. Man that was a good night. Shame about my mate's eyebrows... * This troper and her siblings occasionally make up noodle incidents on the spot, mixing them in with allusions to real situations we've been in. The Kirky Hands incident is real. The [[HPLovecraft Six Shots incident]] is not, though the airsoft lesbian incident is totally true. Herding Daisy scouts, happened. The seven-foot-tall mountain man incident, happened, but not like you think. (Soon I wish to add to my repertoire, courtesy of this page, the whole "I said I was sorry!" thing.) * [[Tropers/NoSoup4Me This troper]] has three, with various repeated lines about them:

--> The Golden Syrup Incident - "I don't eat that stuff anymore" --> The (unrelated) Sugar Rush Incident - "We said we weren't gonna talk about ''{{Alien}}''" --> The Fenwicks Incident - "WHAT HAPPENED IN FENWICKS?!?!?!" - This one is the most frustrating for people as myself, the staff and one other person are the only ones who truly know why I'm not allowed back in the furniture department * Among this troper's circle of friends, the Eighth Grade DeathNote Incident, while not quite as absurd as other [[NoodleIncident Noodle Incidents]] tend to be, was still traumatizing and humiliating enough to, these days, only be referred to in passing. * When writing the backstory to a tabletop RP character who had been a whore before she became a vampire hunter (seriously), this troper managed to break many people over the one line "And then there was the thing with the jam merchant but we'll skip that one." * This troper, when offered an invitation to travel to someplace he doesn't particularly want to go by an Internet person who overestimates degree of friendship, usually says "I'd love to, but I'd rather not set foot in [state/country] again after that unfortunate incident a few years back. She said she was 18..." No such incident happened (except for that one girl in Rhode Island). * This troper doesn't want to go into detail about this one incident. It involved a sleepover, my friends, my friend's sister and HER friends, a bush and a couple flashlights in the darkness. * Apparently my high school shop teacher still talks about my little circular saw incident. In my defense, I didn't know that the wood had been compromised, and that the saw was loose. Although he seems to be largely ignoring the Pine-Sol tiles incident... * Didn't happen to me, but from notalwaysright.com - SON, YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO ME WHEN YOU EAT BAGELS! YOU KNOW IT BRINGS BAD MEMORIES! * This troper now refers to a moment in her middle school career as the Raincloud incident, which caused the fire department to be called to the school, 2 friends to be suspended, a penis drawn on the school wall, a boys homosexual tendencies to come into the light, and an entire school to be soaked. It was a fun day. ;3 * This troper and her friend have an odd one. Man that was a fun sleepover, what with the [=IMing=] and the catfights and the 'coming out'. Of course that dude will never ever see me again without seeing a very embarrassed lady in a bathrobe who's just been outed. (Ironically enough, one thing that was joked about was that me and the friend were bisexual- I actually am, and she's questioning...) * [[{{Tropers/TheCleave}} This Troper]] had a made up NoodleIncident that soon branched off into others, including a famous one that prompted the first quote on my page, but that actually happened... anyway the original fake one was "Jeez, this is like that time with the spork and that fucking cat," which lead to many questions. Another one was the "Time with the credit card, that hobo and Jasmine," sadly a girl I knew was named Jasmine and promptly told me to stop making the joke... that third one was actually with a friend who played along (note him and I are already known for our various antics), I said "Man, I wish we still had that remote," then he screams, "Dude, that

guy is still in a coma! And don't you still get mail from his daughter," my reply is VisibleSilence and a quick remorseful nod. The real incident I won't talk about, but it involved the fire department and a school nearly being burned down... all my fault! * This Troper and his friends will never forget the chicken. Oh no. Or the business with the three doors and the priests. * In this troper's fanfic, the protangonist has a scar on her left hand from "a freak zucchini accident" when she was six, which she refuses to talk about, meaning it's even more traumatic than the story she HAS told about seeing her childhood hero die on live television. * In [[Tropers/PurplePantherGirl this troper's]] story, one of the two main characters has no fingerprints. His excuse for this is 'accidents happen.' But then again, Zed (aformentioned character) doesn't give away alot of things. Including why his face is quite so horribly scarred. * The only way this Troper can get her cousin to shut up is to offhandedly mention, "The casserole incident." Works like a charm. * "Stop doing that. It reminds me of that thing with the orphans, and I do not want those images in my mind again" * This troper has a scar on her leg from an incident involving a broken soap dish and a malfunctioning shower head. I will say no more about it. * This troper occasionally begins telling his wife the story of what happened at Citibank when he was two years old and his mom was 9 months pregnant. He purposely never gets past that introduction before "forgetting". She still hasn't had the opportunity to ask his mom about it... * This Troper has the "shower gel" incident... I've said too much. * This troper and her friend have one, known as the cicada shell/electric guitar incident, involving me, her, her brother, the cicada shell collection and her brother's electric guitar. I have forbidden her to ever, ever, explain it. Although it did raise several questions about [[CargoShip her brother's relationship with his electric guitar...]] ** Of course, she did. Not to everyone, thankfully... At least, I don't think she did... * My brother and I have a RunningGag whenever I'm asked to watch over the barbecue: He always brings up "Fireball Incident Number (1-5)", to which I respond "That NEVER happened! Besides, the firemen got there in time/nobody sued that time/property damages were minimal/[[ThisIsSPARTA It WAS NOT]] visible from orbit, the media always lies!" Which confuses the hell out of my other brother, who has no idea what it is I'm [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial so vehemently denying]]. Of course, none of this really happened, the one time the barbecue DID catch on fire, I wasn't involved. Swear to it. * In refrence to a friend: "That incident with Joey's Sister." I won't say too much besides the fact it ended with the aforementioned friend being run out of town. * This troper sometimes casually refers to "the day I became like this". What was that day? [[spoiler:Like I'm telling you.]] ** The day you were born? * This troper also makes ordinary NoodleIncident type happenings seem

to imply murder. Though there's no excuse for "the one time with the chisels and the root beer", or "the one time with the guy wrapped in tinfoil". Or "the time with the pot smoke and the fan and the John [=McCain sign=]". (I also adore doing this in fiction-- whether it's oblique mentions to a serial killer's "one time in Georgia", or to a [[LesbianVampire vampire's]] "fencing scar incident", which apparently involved [[TroperWorks/TwoGuysAGirlAndAnAversionToSunlight two very handsome students, one very ugly but very charming mensur duelist, and silver salts.)]] * Ask a friend of mine about "two kisses and a Diet Coke candy". * This Troper and his best friend have the 'November 12th incident'. All we ever explain is that it involved alcoholic vomit, a lit cig and a barrel of gasoline. ** "Remember, remember the 12th of November?" * This troper has a friend who she's pretty sure ''still'' visibly shudders at mentions of the "Chilling Tree Incident". * When me and my friends reached the AdvancingWallOfDoom level in NewSuperMarioBrosWii, my comment was "holy fuck, it's [[CthulhuMythos Yog-Sothoth]] again!" My friends were somewhat confused by that immediate identification, so I spent the rest of the level dropping vague, tantalizing hints regarding our [[{{Eversion}} previous encounter]]. * This troper is terrified of E.T., and all I can say is it involved chocolate, backpacks, and halways. * This troper has the thing with the bucket, the shopping channel and the pizza guy and "That Halloween Party With That Girl's Creepy Mum And The Dare" * This troper no longer explains why, when confronted with a rubber chicken, she runs off screaming "Noooo! My poor solar plexus!" * Whenever something bad happens in [[Tropers/TheTallOne This Tropette's]] {{Nakama}}, someone will inevitably say, "Well, it's not as bad as The Kangaroo Porn Incident." After a moment of quiet introspection, everyone will shudder and nod. ''Nothing'' is as bad as Kangaroo Porn. * Happened to a friend: all I heard was that it involved a stolen paddle, climbing a tree and ended with two people falling into a river onto a duck. * This troper once made an apple explode. She answers all questions about it (said question usually being, "How did you explode an APPLE?") with "I just did." ** An experience with this same troper, she is in a roleplay where two character's adventures together are littered with Noodle Incidents. Her personal favorite went like this: --->'''Jun:''' Like that time where you got stuck in that bush, and then you took off your---> '''Lucas:''' We promised never to speak of that again. * This troper likes to LARP and her group of [=LARPing=] friends has a "game-we-do-not-speak-of". It went terribly. That's all. * It's a running gag with this troper's D&D characters that every character he plays is [[BannedFromArgo no longer welcome]] in Waterdeep, Greyhawk, or whatever the largest city in the campaign world is that we're not currently in. I've found [=DMs=] go out of

their way to avoid going to that city so they won't have to explain what exactly happened. * This troper and a couple of friends have "The Duct Tape Incident". Someone cried, many people were blamed, there was yelling and sneaking around. It's great. * This troper's family have a few involving her brother. Most of these involve the way he used to talk, but he did once set the toaster on fire... * [[{{Tropers/nightboomfer}} This troper]]'s friends have a couple. There's the drink machine named Vladimir, "She didn't want the competition," [[{{squick}} the boxes in the woods]], The wall scrolls guy, and the [[{{NauseaFuel}} poop stick]]. * shudder* * This Troper witnessed something just plain weird happen in ''[=LittleBigPlanet=]'' that has never happened since. It involved a Rhythmic Logic device, six Global Water Objects, recursive Emitters (capture the Emitter, set the original to emit the captured one, lather rinse repeat), and an unreal number of Level Keys. Good thing I had a profile backup, because the Complex Shapes Thermo hated me from that day forward until I reloaded the backup... it wouldn't even let me make a ''circle'' in Online Create. [[spoiler:I actually made it up, but that's what an LBP NoodleIncident would probably sound like.]] * In this troper D&D table it's a common thing to be banned from every city we step in, by any reasons. Oh, I remember that time with the elastic band, the drow, the melon and the nude Pelor Paladin running in circles (literally).... Or that time in Mecanus with the drunken Druid and lots of robots.... oh good times. * I always have fun mentioning the Christmas when the turkey exploded. :) * Among my group of friends and myself, there is the "Hitler Incident," which sounds far worse than it really is, but, yes, it is ''that'' Hitler. * Any mention of the Green Jell-o Bubble around my family is bound to induce involuntary gagging. * There's a reason This Troper is no longer allowed to take Nyquil, and the same for her brother not being allowed Benadryll. * For [[Tropers/PentiumMMX2 this troper]], it's more of a ''Refried Beans Incident'' than a Noodle Incident. I'd rather not talk about it... * Occasionally, though thankfully not frequently anymore, this troper's 7th grade April Fool's Day Incident will be brought up. People who have known this troper since 7th grade tend to get frusterated at this troper for refusing to explain what happened. * [[Tropers/PhoenixOasis This Troper]] has a plethora of NoodleIncident stories: ** I was once attacked by a rotisserie. That cost the company I was working for almost $25,000US and got me transferred to a different department with a broken hand. ** I was once thrown out of a strip club for [[DroppedABridgetOnHim Dropping a Bridget]] on the owner whilst onstage. In costume, heels and goth makeup. Apparently, he didn't take to the PecFlex. ** There's the incident where I attempted to stay awake as long as possible and wound up being assaulted by my neighbor with a rubber

hose after four days. [[OpenSaysMe I burst into their house]] (we were pretty good friends) whilst wearing a Little Bo Peep costume (I am male) and screaming gibberish. No alcohol was involved. ** There's the "Party with the Pagans" incident. Combine this trope, WhatDidIDoLastNight, my deck of Tarot cards, about 50 naked people, a bonfire and tons of alcohol. ** I'd give more examples, but they just get more salacious. Just...please don't ask me about the bus to Buffalo. 'kay? *** Oh, give more examples, ''please'' give more examples, I haven't laughed that hard in weeks. And how the hell did a rotisserie attack you? * [[Tropers/DialgaX This troper]] has the ''infamous'' "Social Worker" incident. To this day (5+ years later), he refuses to talk about it, except mention it involved a social worker, the school principal, a group of obnoxious students and a computer. * Whenever someone asks [[Tropers/BigDaddP This Troper]] why his Nintendo DS is broken in two pieces (Well hanging by a literal thread) he tells them it happened during, and because of, an opera that was going on. * When [[Tropers/PiratePikachuZ This Troper]] mentioned that she had had a Noodle Incident (here it would be referred to as "PercyJackson"). Before she could explain herself, her friend instantly asked "Pool or pasta?", then proceeded to outline possible situations such as wild pool parties or a romantic dinner date with a guy friend. This in turn has become its own NoodleIncident, as one only has to point out that something is a pool or pasta noodle to have us laughing. * The professor in my Shakespeare class was passing out lifesavers to everyone. He put one in his mouth, then looked disgusted, walking out of the room just to spit it out. 'That's the second grossest thing I've ever tasted,' he said. 'What's the first?' I asked. He laughed and said he would leave it to my imagination. * This troper and his friend have built up a whole routine based on this, given my propensity for poorly thought out plans: --->Me: [[{{Blackadder}} I have a cunning plan...]] --->Friend: No. You remember what happened last time. --->Me: Oh, come on. It wasn't ''that'' bad. --->Friend: You almost set my house on fire! --->Me: Only like twice! Am I branded for life? Besides, I managed to get us that pizza. --->Friend: By threatening to eat my dog! --->And so forth. * This Troper has a few, all of which genuinely happened: ** The time I exploded a cucumber. No explosives, high pressure apparatus or electrical equipment was involved. Man, the college was picking cucumber seeds out of the woodwork in the physics lab for ''months''. *** For those wondering how I managed that, all I'll say is I used [[NoodleImplements a small loaf of rye bread, 50g leerdammer cheese, a clamp stand and a relatively short length of steel]]. ** There was one incident involving two unsuccessful muggers, a highvoltage discharge, and a contemporaneous power outage covering several

blocks that I had nothing to do with. Honest. ** The thing with the John Belushi impersonator coming out, my girlfriend, certain th... y'know, lets just say that by the end of it all, I swore to sautee his genitalia and feed them to him if he came round again, and leave it at that. Maybe an [[InvertedTrope inversion]] of the trope? * This troper has a scar in her eyebrow since the age of 6. She always avoids the story behind it, except when bothering one of her friends. --->Troper: Come on, try to guess where I got my scar. --->Friend: Let me see... I imagine you as a little kid, running from two bigger boys, then tripping on a log, cutting open your eyebrow and vowing revenge with your face covered in blood... --->Troper: This is strangely... accurately... --->Friend: YEEEEES I GOT IT RIGHT --->Troper: WRONG. [[EvilLaugh Mwahahahahahah!]] --->Friend: You're so mean. * [[{{Tropers/Geostomp}} This Troper]] has several kindergarten incidents that qualify for this status. One of which involved a fly, a fruit pie, and a dirty park bench. He refuses to elaborate. * The ninga incident. It involves [[NoodleImplements pool noodles]]. * [[{{Tropers/Hyrndhrafninn}} This Troper]] and some friends went on a band trip once, and it was there that "The Incident" occured. * The Washington D.C. trip taken by several of my classmates is a gigantic NoodleIncident. All I have been able to glean is something about a group of boys ordering takeout at three in the morning, a four-hour plane delay, and the line [[{{Squick}} "(Teacher's name), DJ WANTS YOU!".]] I ask, and all I get is: ---> Me: What happened on the D.C. trip? ---> Friend: * shudders* What happened on the D.C trip ''stays'' on the D.C trip. ---> Me: WHY WON'T YOU TELL ME!?! * This troper, when he was at University, managed to rack up so many Noodle Incidents with his two dorm mates in a year and a half that we took the time to write them all out on a sheet of paper that we taped to our fridge, and was dubbed "The List". It had one rule - if it's on "The List," it's not a topic for conversation. And in the following months, we managed to add more incidents to it. Quite amazing for three people who enjoyed a good night in more than a good night out. * [[NickTheSwing I]] will never answer questions about the James Dean Incident. Lets just say it involved a [[NoodleImplements leather jacket, some hair gel,]] [[HotForStudent "fangirls"]], [[NoodleImplements a fan boy, a yaoi drawing, a really stupid pun and lots of police.]] * I don't care how funny my group mates find it, how badly they want to share the tape, or how badly my friends want to know; I am NEVER discussing the French King Cake Project with ANYONE besides my parents, who already know, and I REFUSE to make anymore copies of the video. Asking about it will result in denial and crying. * The Scout Corps where I am a member rents a basement in a block of rental apartments, in which we have our meetings and such. In the kitchen of said basement, there are a whole shitload of plastic mugs in a few different colors, that people use for drinking coffee or

water during meetings. You DO NOT use the yellow ones! For a long time, the younger members (such as myself) didn't know why, we only knew that you are to avoid the yellow mugs at any cost. And then [[AwfulTruth they told us]] [[{{Squick}} why]]. * This troper's D&D game started with his fighter and another player's warlock having known each other and adventured together for some time. To reinforce this, we occasionally remind each other of "old adventures", which supposedly occured before the campaign started. They're purely improvised, and kept light on details - not even we players know exactly what happened in Goroth, but it started with the fighter being overconfident, and ended very messily. * [[Tropers/StarshipTroper This Troper]] received the following e-mail while at university. He is ''still'' curious. -->To: [the entire biology, chemistry, physics, and pharmacology departments]\\ From: [Professor]\\ Subject: The Chemistry of Fireworks\\ Date: Wed, 23 Feb 2000 09:07:27 + 0000\\ \\ I would like to apologise to all those people who attended [[EducationThroughPyrotechnics The Chemistry of Fireworks lecture]] yesterday. I take full responsibility for the inconvenience caused, and hope things can return to normal in two weeks' time, with [Staff Member]'s lecture on forensic chemistry, which definitely will not contain any flashes or bangs.\\ \\ Once again, many apologies.\\ \\ [Professor] * For whatever reason, this troper's family tends to acquire [[NoodleIncident noodle incidents]] related to specific restaurants. Just ask my dad about Burger King, or my mom about that one time at Chili's... * [[{{Tropers/Headbreaker}} This Troper]] loves joking about this kind of thing, but I genuinely have one: The Martin Luther King Incident. ** When I see a funny sign concerning regulations, I like to ponder why it was put up, for example, the sign at my college that forbids boating in the nearby pond, or the (NSFW) [[spoiler: clear, detailed synopsis, in five -inch letters, of my state's indecent exposure laws, posted on the side of the clerk's table at a local adult store.]] * This troper has the "Toaster Incident." My brother still refuses to allow me within fifteen feet of the toaster if I'm wearing heels or holding anything. At all. * The exploding hot chocolate incident. * This Troper and his friend have real-life one: --> '''Me:''' You know, I'm glad we're not on a bus to Massachusetts right now. --> '''Friend:''' For the last time, I'm sorry! --> '''Me:''' Do you have any idea how embarrassed I was? --> '''Friend:''' I thought I was being funny. --> '''Me:''' Not everyone enjoys your sense of humor. --> '''Friend:''' But I thought everyone liked-

--> '''Me:''' Just because its funny on the internet doesn't mean that its funny on a crowded bus. * [[Tropers/ShinyBulbasaur This Troper]] has one that doesn't really have a name beyond sometimes being referred to as The Trenchcoat Incident by her best friend. It's why he associates the smell of leather with warm comfort and Christmas, is the genesis of our "Wendy's washes away all sins" jokes, and is why neither of us is ever allowed back to the public pool in our town. There's a story behind it, it's just infinitely funnier without context. * Getting initiated into certain groups can involve [[RiteOfPassage Spirit missions]], which often turn into these. The troper knows of one from his own group which is only referred to as "when (name removed) broke his collar bone," and my own which started as a standard kidnapping attempt, but ended many hours later 45 miles away in a farm town at 2 A.M. explaining to the police why I was leaping into the bed of a speeding truck from an abandoned gas station. It's not nearly as bad as the one that happened the next semester, which was only a problem because they tried it on campus in broad daylight while still in uniform. We usually refer to it by naming one of two people from that initiation class who, ironically, weren't even there because they were waiting to enact another part of the plan, as they were the only licensed pilots on the team. * Anyone asking how my driving lessons with my mom are going is told, "Oh, fine. Well, except for that one incident with the one-lane bridge, the big white truck, and the Elvis mailbox..." * [[@/{{Quillpaw}} This troper]] has several different Gerbil Incidents. There's "the one at New Year's", "the skydiving one", "the one with the bathtub", and "the one in the shower". The last two are totally different things in two totally different bathrooms. Curiously, they all involve the exact same gerbil. ** And then there's the IHOP incident. We do not talk about the IHOP on Washington Road. ** Finally, a NoodleIncident from my roleplay that's only a NoodleIncident to the characters (and my partner, who was not really familiar with the Final Fantasy games). "[[FinalFantasyVII Reno's]] not going. As soon as I mentioned space travel, he kind of freaked out, something about a meteor and somebody's mother..." * Attempts to avoid studying for a Chem II exam (not to mention more energy drinks than necessary) led to a Noodle Incident for this troper and her friends. It involved lotto tickets, a debate about whether or not ducks are witches, a sandbox, a potato, lighter fluid, a blue plastic tub, a pooper scooper and an evergreen tree. Needless to say, people are quite confused when we mention these things, but we refuse to admit most of the incident even happened. And no one ever found the plastic tub, so they can't prove we did anything. * This Troper has what is known only as "The Clown Incident." All he will reveal is that he will never step foot in a place with Lazer Tag ever again. Plus, he is now terrified of all clowns. In the world. * This troper joined his school in the middle of term, and everyone in theatre class was whispering about the "music room incident". I went around not knowing what this referred to until a while later. Apparently, one of the theatre students was caught making out with a

music student in, where else, the music room (I go to an arts school). The teacher who caught them said "your lips are meant for playing the tuba, not for kissing". HilariousInHindsight is that the music student was a trombonist. * Original Poster here, suddenly remembered his friend's friend had an [[InvertedTrope inversion]] of this trope. This guy had to do a skit. The skit ''explained how the original NoodleIncident happened!'' It completely ruined it. This Troper admitted;y doesn't know how this guy thought it happened, he wasn't there. * [[{{Tropers/ICantThinkOfAWittyName}} I]] ''always'' reference the "Drinkbottle" incident. It involved Facebook, a message, two of my friends that are a couple, one of the couple's long-gone online boyfriend, my tendency to verbally HostageSpiritLink, a frozen drinkbottle, nervous knee-jerk reactions, hammer-throwing and screaming. If I start to display signs of nervousness, my friends tend to take anything out of my hands. NoodleIncident indeed. * Remember that time as a kid, when you walked in on your parents having sex? We will never speak of that incident again. * There was this one incident with my mom, in college... [[spoiler: She didn't tell me, actually.]] * When this troper, for his 11th Birthday earlier this year, started talking about the rolling pin incident. For the record, it involved our kitchen, some ranch dipping sauce, an episode of {{Pokemon}}, lots of bananas, the internet, a carrot, a Wobbuffet Pokemon toy, The Porn Channel, and finally a rolling pin. What happened My mom was making pizza in the kitchen when suddenly an EAS test (Child Abduction Emergency, to be exact), came on while I was watching Pokemon. My mom was so freaked out she threw the rolling pin up in the air causing it to knock down my favorite kitchen statue. I was so pissed I tried throwing my Wobbuffet action figure at the wall in pure anger. The EAS was still going on so I decided to change the channel to a random number. That number that came on the television was The Porn Channel, which [[spoiler: was convieniently showing a man masturbating.]] You can probaly guess what happened with the carrots, the bananas and the ranch. Yeah. But I'll tell you anyway. [[spoiler: My mom tried giving me "The Talk", which I had learned a year prior to the incident. She demostrated male masturbstion which involved her squezzing a banana so all of the mush went to the top. She also demonstrated by cutting a carrot's [[DoubleEntendre head]] in half ind filling it with ranch dressing and showed me some pictures on a dirty website.]] I never looked at Bananas the same way again... ** ...Good God. * A sentence that I will hopefully never hear again is "remember the bus and the screaming?" * This is the troper who posted the rolling pan incident. Last year my 5th grade class (Yes, this troper recently turned eleven) went to the Castillo de Saint Augustine and there was born the infamous "Squirrel Incident" Which involved Lesbionic graffiti, the cops being called TWICE, A drawing (and a poorly drawn one at that) of a penis and vagina, and 2 Squirrels [[DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything "Interacting"]]. Also never talk about the Kohl's flyer STD incident with me or my mother around. There is also the Toyota Corolla incident, The

meatballs incident which involved me as a stupid little kid, some dog crap and an old lady, The phone incident, The [[ShockSite 2 girls 1 cup incident]], which involved me, an internet {{Troll}}, and my friend Seamus, the Vagina on Monitor incident, Similar to the 2 girls 1 cup incident but only 10x worst, the Swap.avi incident(I managed to survive 30 minutes), the Kool-Aid incident which involved the sweet old lady up the street, some worms and some sour Kool-Aid. The [[MahouSenseiNegima Chisame x Misora]] incident, The Mah Diary incident which involved a horribly homely diary full of hidden cigarettes and over 300 pages of unnerving nonsensical gibberish crap all written in leetspeak: ** For example: *** I was ridin mah bacicle (sic) when @&ik $^@ IMMA FIRIN MAH CANON! So i herd u liek mudkipz JOEYS RATTATAS IN TEH TOP PERCENTAGE OF RATTATAS PIKACHU TEH HORN etc. * The Diary incident involved a screwed up [=McDonald's=] order, a ditch, and a picture of what {{Clannad}} Afterstory 14 should've looked like. The afterstory involved a hard scatological threesome involving Nagisa, Tomoya, and [[NauseaFuel AKIO.]] The Publix Hoagie incident(s) which has happened more than once, the {{House of Payne}} incident,(My computer was glitched for weeks because of this.) The invisible Mama Mirabelle Humping incident, (See the Peppa Pig incident.) the Peppa pig incident which involved me accidently viewing Shota on an untrusted website, and finally the infamous Cool Whip incident which is ten times worst than the rolling pan incident and the worst part of it is, I am still currently facing complications due to it. It involved my Preyas bakugan ball, maggots, pliers, blueberries, scones and Cool Whip. I will say no more. * shudders* * this troper's friend likes to mess with the therapists his parents send him to. he invented a noodle incident involving catsup, a hamster, a bowling ball and math homework. * During what was, mercifully, [[@/SoWeAteThem my]] last year of summer camp, I had invoked the hatred of a nine-year old girl. It reached the point where one of her friends gave an accusation that had her father speaking to the counselors. While they did discuss it with me before ultimately shrugging it off, neither of them told me what it was. ** Every year at my high school, the seniors take a trip to the nearby Disneyland. To prevent us from acting up, the teachers told us a scare story about a misbehaving student. We never found put what happened, but apparently, he didn't walk during graduation, and he had to spend the whole twelve hours or so in the bus they rode there. ** Also, a family friend has one: "[[EnfantTerrible Did you know that bunnies can scream?]]" * [[{{Tropers/Chamale}} This Troper]] has a story involving a frying pan, the most ammonium perchlorate we could legally purchase, and 2 hours to use it up before a new bylaw came into effect. But you won't get to hear it. * This troper has the Uniform Debate Incident, which invovled a petition, nail polish and our English teacher trying to avoid us for a couple of days afterwards. I still think he's kind of shocked that four supposedly quiet teenage girls can be that loud.

* This Troper has two incidents: ** "The Whole Enchilada" Incident happened in 3rd grade. My entire class teased me about it for 3 years until I transferred to a new school for 7th, and everyone ''still'' thinks I did it to get out of gym class, even though I didn't. ** Never bring up "the Valentine's chocolate and the steak knives" around my family OR the neighbors. I '''said''' I was sorry, and besides, it was totally my sister's fault in the first place. * One needs only say the words "dalmatian puppy" to send [[{{Tropers/albino-ottsel}} this Troper]] into a fit of giggles and this Troper's older brother into a sulk. Subverted, because I will usually tell the whole story because it's so funny ([[AnnoyingYoungerSibling to me, at least]]). * [[{{Tropers/ParadoxicalFrog}} I]] have several of these. Like the time I got chased out of the house by a goat, for example... * [[{{Tropers/Twotall}} I]] was once asked by a friend "Hey, why isn't X (another friend) on MSN?". For some reason, I decided to tell her "Well, he was, earlier (this was true), but not since... that THING... happened..." When this peaked her curiosity, I just adamantly refused to elaborate, claiming that we had all been sworn to silence. She even went so far as to inquire witha third friend, who ''picked up on the joke'' and ''also'' refused to tell her! Now she is going out of her mind trying to find out what could happen to scare a big, adult, computer-savvy man off MSN forever... * This troper is the subject of countless queries with "grilled cheese" as the subject. [[{{Squick}} You really don't want to know]]. * The 'food court video', which starts with the line "[friend], why did you take it off", and ends with "automatic taco launching machine and what am I saying? stop recording!" The subject of the video? My friends refusal to ride a certain roller coaster. * How exactly did that scrape get on the old Camry? Well, it wasn't ''exactly'' a curbstone, but no one really needs to know. Besides, we sold the car three years ago and I can't afford the place anymore. * There is always an awkward silence if This Troper or one of his friend's mentions "The Blog". All you need to know is that SOMEBODY ALMOST WENT TO JAIL. Nuff said. * Any time this troper's little sister wants him to do something for her, this exchange happens: -->'''Troper:''' Remember that dent I got on the back of my car that Mom and Dad don't know about? -->'''Little Sister:'''...(Walks away.) * [[Tropers/{{Eranova}} This Troper]] has a few incidents of his own, which I actually don't mind telling the full story, but find it to be much more amusing to let the listener guess the context. These involve [[{{Pokemon}} "The Charmander Incident"]] (which may have contributed to my friend's intense fear of both dolls and homosexuals), "[Person]'s Cousin" (which involved a glass of water, KingdomHearts, and [[NotWhatItLooksLike a 10-year-old girl doing things she shouldn't be doing until she's at least 21]]), "The Clock Store Dream" (where I didn't realize [[{{Squick}} what I was doing to that poor Pikachu]] until that girl started laughing at me), and "ThePowerOfLove" (which included a grocery store, a single bullet, an extremely AxCrazy

psycho, and a very distraught virgin). There are also several that start with me expressing my disdain for a certain church in town, and when questioned about it, my response varies depending on the incident I recalled at that moment, including... ** "Let's just say I'm related to a serial killer in the making. Honestly, how did they not see the freaking knife?!" ** "Did you ever notice that green stain on the floor on the left side of the building that never seemed to come off? Well..." ** "Have you ever been strapped to a chair while a crazy priest slapped you in the forehead repeatedly? I still wonder what the hell the congregation was chanting in the background..." ** "A weekend in late November. I ended up walking out of there soaking wet, with left shoulder pains and the link to a cute girl's Myspace page." ** All in all, I don't exactly have the best experiences with the Catholic church. Let's just say I'm never stepping inside of one again and leave it at that. * I was telling my freind a story, when another came by, all he heard was "...so, you believed me about the muffin mug, but not the evil spying on you fly?" He still doesn't know... * This [[Tropers/{{Godzillawolf}} Troper]] will forever refer an event known as the 'Trip From the Bookstore From Heck', but know this, it involved argueing, several cups of water, his mom thinking she saw the 'devils eyes', his adult sister who acts like a rebelious teen, and a mentally challenged child. * "Remember that time in the Kitchen?" "......What Kitchen?" Will send this troper and her Best friend in hysterics but will cause everyone else to ask questions.[[spoiler: Honestly, it was just us both tripping towards each other at the same time and nearly earning myself an entry on the TroperTales AccidentalKiss page.... ]] But we SWORE never to speak of it to any friend. ** And then there was "That time in my living room with my niece, various snacks, soda and Tivo" Which will cause this troper and her best friend to look at each other nervously and start a yelling match about never mentioning it again. Ever. It's far too embarrassing and ridiculous. And no, I'm not even going to tell the internet about THAT one. * I have a couple. ** "The Fake Nails Incident" with my best friend. It was so horrible, I vowed never to let her glue stuff to me ever again. ** "That Time On the Bus Where I Bit Liza". It's been brought up recently. --> Me: IT WAS THREE YEARS AGO. LET. IT. GO! ** "The Science Expiriments at Summer Camp Incident" * [[{{Komorebi}} My]] boyfriend has one that we refer to as That Time In Michigan with the Scientologists. * This troper's brother was part of one. Essentially, it involved a teacher, a projector, and a porno tape. Do the math. * The bunny, it was a stuffed bunny. that is all I will say. Enjoy your entirely wrong assumptions and Squick * [[Tropers/{{Nemica}} This troper]] had her {{Naruto}} RP character Yukiko use this. It was her team's first mission to pick up a crate of

noodles and take them to Ichiraku's. The civilian part of her clan makes a living with funerals. -->'''Yukiko''': I've already witnessed a funeral where they served noodles. Was a cook from a noodle kiosk. -->... -->'''Yukiko''': Then let's go. I'd say we'd stay on the ground... there are stories about [[NoodleIncident noodle incidents]]... -->... -->'''Yukiko''': There are people who would kill for noodles... * This troper has a "toilet seat incident". * this troper is rather accident prone. This manifests itself in P.E classes at school. To date, she has been injured by every piece of sports equipment at her school- yes all of them. even the basket ball ''hoops''. It's a long, painful story... ** In addition to the 'basketball hoop fiasco', as her class dubbed it, there's also the 'rope swing issue', which involves a tree, a skateboard, a rope swing,a large , angry raccoon, and a Mormon Tabernacle Choir CD. * This Troper and his friends have the phrase "Just like that night with [[KingdomHearts Riku]]". We heard it from a Kingdom Hearts Abridged Series. It's interchangable with "That's what she said" * People in my circle of friends will often reference "the Tenby trip", a group holiday that five of us took. After a while, when out friends' opinions of us had dropped sufficiently, we decided that What Happens In Tenby Stays in Tenby" and it has since become one of these for those in the know. We also use it jokingly, to reference things that never actually happened, purely because for all a lot of people know, it could, and very well might, have happened in Tenby. * For this Troper, he has the Six Thirty Underwear Incident. I will never elaborate on the subject and you can't make me. * The Cheese Incident of '05. There was [[NoodleImplement cheese.]] Lots of it. * This troper's tabletop RPG group have the 'Scotland Incident' for our After the Bomb campaign. All we know is that it started with my DukeNukem expy character saying the words, "Hey guys, watch this!" and ended with out truck stripped of its armour plating, our entire team of nutso mercenaries slightly traumatised and a hasty flight south to London. ** It recently transpired it also involved a fuel refinery (NOT our fault!) an ammo dump (totally our fault) and a police station (Yeah, my character's fault...) * This trope's noodle incident is what we call "the tar incident". All I'm aloud to say is in involved a 5 galleon bucket of tar, fireworks, three guys the age of eighteen, and a miniature Trebuchet, a very large rubber band poorly timed icy and a rather distraught pelican family. all of this resulted in me coming back without my right sleeve, another head to toe in white ash, the third missing his left shoe and a phone tower on fire on the horizon. we have never told anyone the middle because we always wanted our own privet noodle incident so we decided to keep the details secret and only when all three of us had wives would we revel what happened to our wives, who likely will not care.

* I'll always remember the first day of July 2007. It involved an unopened can of Diet Coke, welding rods, a hunt for a missing Nintendo DS, and it all ended with my aunt hitting me in the head with a freshly killed chicken. It was THAT weird, people. * --> Gianna: Hey, [[Tropers/AdelePotter Susie]], remember when---> Me: NO. --> Gianna: But---> Me: No. Remember our little agreement? You can only tell that story if you need to distract someone from killing you! ** There are however, a couple details I'm willing to reveal. Anyone care to know? *** [[Tropers/KatanaCat Yes please]]. *** [[Tropers/AdelePotter Me]]. My [[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} best friend]]. Field trip. Lever. Sour cream. 30 kids screaming. The rest is gonna be left up to your imagination. * There's two that always seem to come up in [[Tropers/KatanaCat my]] writing - The Pikachu Incident (involving an unfortunate mishap with an attempt at VoluntaryShapeshifting), and the (unrelated) {{Kirby}} [[GuiltyPleasure Incident]]. In real life, there's the Cotton Candy Incident, which involved some rather graphic SlashFic, and which I have never explained beyond that to ''anyone''. Anyone want a couple of other details? ** [[Troper/AdelePotter Eh, sure,]] [[TemptingFate why not?]] *** Okay then. The Pikachu Incident had someone being turned into Pikachu by accident and not fully trusting the one who did it any more, the Kirby Incident led to someone throwing out a GBA Game Pak for ''Kirby - Nightmare in Dreamland'', and the Cotton Candy Incident... what the hell, I'll just explaing the whole thing. I was browsing around [[FanFic FanFiction.net]], reading some Sonic 'fics, and found something... [[Lemon odd]]. It started out just being Sonic and Amy having a cotton candy-eating contest and quickly turned into mindless shipping. The summary mentioned a few terms I was not familiar with at the time, which is why I was stupid enough to click it. Once I started reading I couldn't stop, like watching a car accident take place. I clicked the "lemonized version" that had the bit that was cencored in what I found the first time, I'm not even sure why I did, and... well, that was my first expiriance involving RuleThirtyFour that I can remember. The curious may look up M-rated Sonic fanfics containing the words "cotton candy". * Invoked by [[Tropers/SabresEdge this troper]]: when he was called into the dean's office on a non-discipline-related-matter, the first words out of his mouth were "This isn't about the NoodleIncident, is it?" Sadly, none of the staff were CalvinAndHobbes fans. * [[Tropers/GamerFromJump I'm]] not allowed back to Kennedy Space Center after the incident with the Space Shuttle and the {{Playstation}}. [[hottip:*:Not really. Though whatever one could get up to with those would be AWESOME.]] * Of course, a real one would be why I pass on alcohol now. The Pizza Incident should never happen again. * One of the best stories that I or anyone else has ever heard belongs to my friend D. and involves nuclear magnetic resonance and body

piercings. It was distinctly X-rated, although not on purpose. * This troper was on site frequents, Neoseeker, and read this. None of us knows the answer, but I felt this was far too funny to pass up sharing: "So after a track meet today I walk into my dorm about 40 minutes ago to see the most wtf thing I've seen in a while...My roomate had set up a small table in the middle of the room. There was a chair on both sides of the table, and on one chair was a plush of this (link to Perry/Agent P)...but that's not it. There was a bottle of honey in the center of the table. He said "yeah...don't ask" and told me he'd need the room to himself at 7-8 or 9. Luckily I was going to be gone will 10..." ** This updated part just adds to comedy level of it: "Ok, so I've returned to my dorm room. No one is here, the plush has a Home Depot apron on and is lying on the chair on its face. There is a KFC box in the trashcan and a half-eaten biscuit on the table. The room smells weird, probably the KFC." * This troper once knew a female friend (who happens to be TallDarkAndBishoujo) who went through several boyfriends, never having a permanent relationship. Once I went out on a friendly date with her, and asked about what went wrong with those old boyfriends, and she refused to tell, ''especially'' the last one (which was about 5 years ago), making me wonder if it ''was'' a NoodleIncident (come to think of it, I think I recall she did mention something about an old broom). Last I heard of her, she's still single (and considering she's the eldest of 3 siblings, and her two younger ones are already married). * The new year's eve incident of '09. All I can say is that there was [[NoodleImplements ABBA, a round of Scrabble, and several instances of people asking: "Hey, why is X naked?"]] * Subversion: I ''could'' tell you what "Pulling a Tessie" is and where it originated, but I won't because there may be children around. * In addition to the above (I'm [[Tropers/AdelePotter Adele Potter]]), me and my friend Gus enjoy making up fake [[NoodleIncident Noodle Incidents]]. Just today.... --> '''Gus:''' So, what's the plan? --> '''Me:''' We are going... TO STEAL CHRISTMAS!! --> '''Gus:''' Again? Remember what happened last year? --> '''Me:''' NO ONE CAN PROVE WE DID THAT!!!! ** Not to mention: --> '''Me:''' Remember what happened LAST time you tried to get rid of me? --> '''Gus:''' Oh yeah... --> '''Me:''' Yeah. You managed to get us [[BannedFromArgo banned from Cincinnati.]] * [[Tropers/StongRadd This Troper]] will constantly pull this off. For example: the "failed cloning expirement" or the "[[SidetrackedByTheGoldenSaucer Golden Saucer]]". * This troper and the rest of 2009's freshman honors class at a Catholic High school always crack up at the mention of the words "Bills vs. Rams". It involves a health class, a recording of a football game (and something else), and an apology letter to all of the parents. I wouldn't mind stating directly what happened, but I find it more fun to simply give small details. If you're clever

enough, it's pretty easy to figure out. * [[Tropers/KamuiValentine This troper]] is sure her life is made of Noodle Incidents. Most famously are her trips to Scotland, New York City, and any time she goes to Nationals for Tae Kwon Do. Especially Scotland, there's a reason I'm still not allowed to visit Russia, it's safer for everyone that way. Trust me. * To this troper, it seems like every single person in her class other than herself knows about the incident that involved Lisa's sister, firework in citric acid and a drag queen. This troper really wants to know. * My noodle incident is why my last relationship ended. Not one person i know (other than my ex and anyone she told, which is doubtfully anyone) actually knows the real reason for it ending. All i'll say is that it was worse than rape and she knows never to contact me again. Horrible when i look back on it, but strange as nobody outside me and her would know what actually happened. * "The Mp3 player incident". I won't go into detail, but it involved a giant can of tuna, an intervention, a stray packet of mayonaise, nutella, being forced to look at meatspin, and an alchoholic hobo in a latrine. * There was that one time, with the tie and the flask and those few candles... good times. * This troper refuses to use USB drives in computers and got them banned after that one time in 8th grade. I guess it might be easy to figure out what I did, but that's just me. People who knew me from back then will always say something like: "You mean, that was ''you?!'' ** I'm also writing an UrbanFantasy, which has one incident where a PsychoForHire werewolf named Haru Nikolaievitch (Kind of a heroic one, I'm trying hard not to make him a MartyStu. Also, there is a good reason for him being an out of place Japanese name but this really isn't the place for writing critique.) can't leave his children at home while he goes on "business trips" because of "that horrible Halloween incident earning Haru's son Jack the moniker Shatterjack, the one with the pumpkin, a girl covered in glitter, a costume that was far too real, and an exploding book, nobody in Harus hometown would host Wren, Camille, and John Nikolaievitch, not even Harus best friends. And he couldnt bribe them with any amount of whisky." ** And yes, it whad something to do with ''Literature/{{Twilight}}''. * A friend of [[{{Tropers/Kadorhal}} mine]] who draws frequently once made an image calling attention to his new drawing style. It begins with one of his characters saying "...and that's how I [[SavingChristmas saved christmas.]]" * The Live Ammunition Incident. It's a weird story. No deaths caused. That is all. * The Valentine's Day Incident of '08. It wasn't pretty. * This troper went to Mataranka when he was 4. He has not eaten vegemite since. * In a recent production of Frankenstein, we had a completely new kid that had never done a show before. The director told us "not to scare him", and not to mention the goat story. During the performances, he kept asking us about the story, but we swore that we couldn't tell

him. It was turned into an initiation thing that involved a pair of boots, a goat, a stump, and a table saw (but the saw is not what you think it's for). To this day, he still does not know what it is. [[spoiler: There is no goat story, in case you couldn't tell.]] * After a sleepless night during my family vacation I'm never going to let Mom forget that thinking of {{Shipping}} helps me sleep * This troper posted an SMBC comic on a friend's facebook page, and the friend said something about how he disproved the theory presented in the comic (that it takes 22 ninjas, minimum, to violate causality) by saying "It's a long story involving a [[BackToTheFuture DeLorean]] and raccoons, followed by YouDoNotWantToKnow. ** He also mentioned in another comment that he'd had a couple shots of tequila, and woke up in the Mojave desert with no pants in the 1950s, and [[ItGotWorse it went downhill from there.]] However, he claims that "anything that my gran says about the llamas is a filthy lie." I'm tempted to call him out on the bullshit, but quite honestly, the guy is a CrazyAwesome CloudCuckoolander. I'm forced to consider the possibility that he's not lying. * This trope was responsible for the most CrazyAwesome Facebook thread [[@/PhoenixFire I've]] ever seen. I'd describe it, but it's probably better to [[http://img844.imageshack.us/i/seafoodmafianamesremove.png/ just let you read it]]. Names and pictures have been removed to protect the guilty. I will, however, admit that I'm Purple. * This troper was witness to something called the "Heidelberg Incident" - the details escape me, but it involved a bucket, two bottles of cheap wine, urine, salsa, bathwater, clothes pegs and an unwary victim... * This troper has a few of these, one of which resulted in her catchphrase... it involves the worst birthday party ever, the FOIL method, and the lovely combination of black and blue. * This troper and her friends often refer to "The Camping Trip." It involved the car catching on fire, horses, identity theft, friendship bracelets, heat stroke, almonds, and taco bell. It also led to this troper and her best friend not talking for 3 months. * This troper has one, which she refers to as "The Letter" or "My First Trip to the Principal's Office". It involved my bus stop, addressing a teacher by their first name, fake fury, decaying teeth, "piercing red eyes", and one very uncomfortable visit to the principal's office. It's probably on the TV Tropes site somewhere in some TroperTales page, or it will be eventually. * My best friend's boyfriend told us a story once, and, well... I'm the only one of us who eats sushi anymore. * this tropers sister and cousin use my noodle incident as a joke... it involved my [[BlackBestFriend Black Best Friend]] a [[DepravedBisexual confession about our relationship]] a condom...i think you can make up what happened with just that information. * This troper has a few. 1) The Waldsee Incident, because what happens at summer camp STAYS the fuck at summer camp 2) The valium dream (in which my imagination strangled me) 3) When 2 Cali Grrls threw a party... (as in "Where'd you learn the Apples2Apples Drinking Game?" or "When did you figure out you were a YuriFan?") * This tropers brother and some family friends have The White Water

Rapids Incident; which involved a dare, an annoying guy who hung around them on holdiay, a de-pantsing and some very fast moving water. This troper always has a good laugh about it, but everyone else has resolved to take the incident to the grave... * See, ANY even slightly weird story can become a great Noodle Incident if you just state the general gist. For instance: there was that time I was out fishing and caught a seagull; the time I went out for a quiet pint and ended up at a pagan fire festival; the time I had a brick wall fall on me while breaking into my own house; the time I woke up hung over on a peninsula at 5 in the morning and had to scramble before it became an island; the time I had to hold in a giggle fit at the BBC Proms; the time I outwrestled a 16-year-old US Marine brat while wearing a kilt... * Me and my BFF have a few. There's the Bikini incident of 2009, that time I got kicked off the slide at the playground, and then there's an infamous (around a different set of friends) 'Johnny Incident'. The last one involves figure skating, a dummy in a suit, and head being lost. * Our AP Psychology teacher told us that, shortly after graduating high school (in Western Pennsylvania), "For reasons I won't disclose, I ended up sleeping behind a dumpster in Melborne, Australia...[continues discussion about sleep cycles]" * Our school's Quidditch tournament used pool noodles for brooms...resulting in at least one strangely literal "Noodle Incident." * This troper once wrote a story in which one of the characters mentioned a thing "with a lobster and a snare drum." Not even I know what happened, and I'm the author. * While camping, this troper's brother may have given a group of kangaroos a fear of Frisbees. ** My school has also provided quite a few semi-Noodle Incidents. There's the Narnian Bullrush Game, The Bird Strikes Back, the Thing in the Tree, The Escort of the Blue Wasp, the Map Trick, the LARP Craze, the Ants in the Toilet, the Vampire Cicada... * This troper has precsisely one: The Incident-That-Will-Probably-NotBe-Named-In-The-Near-Future. It involved my computer, the Ukrainian Military (I live in Australia), immense amounts of rage, and a guide. [[spoiler: In fact, I just made that up... [[OrIsIt or did I....]] ]] * This troper has a few of these moments: "The Car Alarm Incident" (which involves it being 2 am, a car alarm, a cell phone, and mouthwash), "The Fleabag Incident" (which involves a phone and a guy named Rich), "The Underwear Incident" (which involves underwear, my friend Sara, and too much spare time on our hands), and "The Douglas Incident" (which involves my cat Douglas, a hose, and lots and lots of band aids). * This troper would prefer that everything from 12/31/10 to 2/25/11 had ''never happened'' and will pretty much blow up at anyone who references it (especially in reference to fifteen minutes). It was a very strange (and rage inducing) two month period involving her best friend's neighbor, a couple dates, said neighbor being a perverted asshole who told her to do [[ADateWithRosiePalms certain unmentionable things]], lots of rage, a very random breakup, and more rage, not

counting the lasting effects (homicidal rage, plans on kicking said neighbor's ass, fights with her mother, said neighbor's ''nonstop'' talking about needing to "explain" and how they "need" to be friends, and friend's parents' being awesome). Her best friend still won't stop apologizing for that. * A funny conversation at lunch at school with a couple of friends. --> Friend 1: ''Hey Troper?'' --> Troper: ''Yeah?'' --> Friend 1: ''You never really told us about that "thing in the hall".'' --> Troper: ''I have been sworn to secrecy. As were all witnesses.'' --> Friend 2: ''Didn't it involve a basketball? That's all you told me.'' --> Troper: ''No, it was a soccer ball...and there was a [[{{NoodleImplements}} chef's hat]] too.'' --> Random Person: ''A chef's hat? Now I'm curious.'' * I jumped off a moving taxi, got attacked by a [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rufous-vented_Chachalaca rufous-vented chachalaca]], got stuck on a fence, got my foot crushed by a fountain, had to shut down a fire in my apartment(twice), was in the head when an earthquake happened, played with body parts of a dead person (she smelled like prosciutto), inhaled floor cleaning by accident... I wish I was joking. * This troper went on a school trip that involved a huge swing, an annoying vending machine, a lot of rain and some bunk beds. He has sworn never to give anyone any information about the FurryFandom ever again, despite how funny the comment about a certain female actor was. * I have several The Kyle Incident (as mentioned above) The chicken on a stick incident (NEVER accept fried chicken from strangers at a fair) The Nefertiti is a tramp incident ( it involved a crawling bra... nuff said) The kindle incident (Me being grounded and a "lost" kindle) And the Geocaching Adventure. * [[@/{{Pastylover2}} This troper]] has one real one and some fake ones made in my improv club: ** The real one happened last weekend. It involved mud, a pipe spewing out water and my electric wheelchair. ** And now from my improv group: The Lighter Incident and The Time I Chopped Down the Tree. * Ahh, Noodle Incidents. [[@/OhNoes I've got]] the Six Flags Bee, the Trampoline, Mutual Shoe Theft and Possession, Stealing Second Base... Some incidents that my friends involved themselves in were The Space Camp Incident, The 6th Period Science Flood, Horizontal Pole Dancing, and pretty much anything else that happened at our middle school. * The same troper who brought you "The Letter", above, has recently gotten another one. It has to do with the Steel Force ride at Dorney Park, her crush, two of her best friends, a guy she didn't (and still doesn't) know, and the pretty Asian ride attendant. Yes, the fact that the attendant is Asian DOES relate to the incident. * This troper's cousin and he have '[[Films/XMen That One]] [[PottyFailure Time at The Rio]]', and... the 'Moon Bowl'. The bad part was, they happened on consecutive days. * Do you remember that time this troper broke a can-opener?

* This troper still hasn't let her brother forget the zombie incident. She does admit, however, that the tentacled plant incident was entirely her fault. ** I do hope the zombie incident was nothing like my toilet zombie incident. * My family has several. The Twin Incident involved my twin brother and me being trusted to stay at home alone for a weekend, an unknown bottle of something we discovered to be alcoholic a hotglue gun, a lot of blood and a hospital visit, my fingerprints still havent grown back, neither of us are trusted alone for more than a few hour and my twin claims it's the reason for my fear of blood (it isn't). The Poison Cookie Incident is used to mock my usually good cooking (no, the cookies werent really poison). Not even I know all of what happened in my twins Pacman Incident. The Monster Clown Incident involved my little brothers fear of clowns, our nieces birthday and another hospital visit. The rarely mentioned Baseball Cosplay Incident involved, along with cosplay and baseball, yet another hospital visit and twelve stitches, I still mourn the loss of my Orochimaru costume. Actually, come to think of it, theres a noodle incident for nearly all of mine and my twins scars (and we have a collective ninety-eight) * At [[Tropers/ZoeZoeWriter this tropette's]] school, "that incident" is what caused the TV and Film class to need extremely explicit hall passes (e.g "1, 2, and 3 may go to the office for filming until 10:30 AM.) I am one of 5 people to know what "that incident is. [[spoiler: One day during the after school program, an Amish girl (MY) in TV and Film (I don't know why) persuaded my best friend's boyfriend (AC) and another friend of mine (JB) to go to the storage room with her. Once there, MY persuaded them to throw dye all over everything. The walls were trashed and $1000 worth of chorus uniforms were destroyed. [[EpicFail They didn't notice the security cameras.]]]] * It involved hot coffee, a coffee cup, and a small explosion. No, really. ---Remember that one time you went back to NoodleIncident, and did that thing with the tree and your clothes? Fun times... ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NoPartyLikeADonnerParty * This troper's dog, actually. Before she was adopted from the animal shelter, her previous owner was an older person who apparently didn't get out much. They died of a stroke or a heart attack, leaving the dog alone in the house with the body...for a couple of weeks. She'd started eating the body by the time they were discovered. Apparently the deceased's relatives not only didn't want to take in the dog--a very sweet, friendly cocker spaniel whose only personality fault is that she tends to panic when [[FridgeHorror left alone]]--but wanted to have her ''put to sleep.'' Hey, if ''you'' wanted enough of grandpa left to bury, you should have checked in more often! ** Can't blame the dog for doing what was necessary to survive. Hope

she's OK now. ** Hug the fucking dog... NOW. DO IT. * Back when this troper was a Boy Scout, I was often the crew leader on our long-term camping expeditions. As such, I was responsible for (among other things) reprovisioning at the various supply stops. The other boys in the crew would joke that if we ever ran out of food, I would be the first to be eaten. We even sang songs about it. ** This troper's scout troop did the same thing. I was the youngest, so evidently I'd be the tenderest. * This Troper actually wrote a play called ''The Cannibal Run'' with this trope as the premise for a theatre class. My teacher liked it so much I got to direct a performance of it at the end of the year. * My dad's dislike of Cheez-Its recently led to the following conversation: --> '''Dad:''' So...if I was shipwrecked on a desert island, how long do you think it'd be before I'd start eating Cheez-Its? --> '''Me:''' Well, after you'd finished off the rest of your crew... ---Back to [[NoPartyLikeADonnerParty the party.]] ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NoPlansNoPrototypeNoBackup * [[{{Tropers/HG131}} This Troper]] is purposely averting it, as he keeps a constantly updated backup of the BuffyTheVampireSlayer page just in case another giant crash happens. It also serves the purpose of any links that are red telling you if a page was lost and letting you rebuild it. I update the BTVS page so often that even a loss of two months would be at least 100 tropes lost from it. * [[{{Tropers/Tracer}} This Troper]], back in his teen-age years, wrote a role-playing game called ''Role-Playing Space Ships''. It was essentially DungeonsAndDragons with medieval characters replaced by spacecraft, and dungeons replaced by mazes made out of asteroids with money hidden in them (!). Sadly, the one and only manuscript for this (ahem) epic masterpiece of game engineering has never resurfaced.

NoPointsForNeutrality * [[Tropers/TeraChimera This troper]] came up with what might be a good aversion: in an RPG, you have the normal good/bad meter (and maybe a lawful/chaotic one), and one of the skills is persuasion. Naturally, doing good stuff increases goodness, and bad stuff increases badness. However, acting neutral moves you toward the middle of the meter and ''also'' nets you free persuasion points - because you're impartial, people on both sides are more likely to trust you. Good people won't trust you as much as if you were totally good, and bad people won't trust you as much as if you were pure evil, but it's a happy medium, since evil people won't trust good characters, and good people won't trust evil characters.

::Additionally, both sides have merchants that offer you exclusive stuff, and adjust their prices accordingly based on their alignment, with the [[InfinityPlusOneSword absolute best stuff]] reserved for the people who are on their side. Because a neutral character will have a lot of persuasion points, they can talk the merchants' prices for the [[InfinityMinusOneSword really good, but not best, stuff]] down to a manageable level, and do this for ''both'' sides. For example, say the "best" and "really good" good stuff are the Holy Armor of +50 Regeneration and the Claymore of +10 Lightning, respectively, and the "best" and "really good" evil stuff are the Corrupted Scimitar of +40 Crowd Damage and the Shield of +10 Damage Reflection. A good character will get the Holy Armor and Claymore easily, but can't get the Corrupted Scimitar, period, and has to shell out [[BeyondTheImpossible almost-unattainably huge]] amounts of money for the Shield, with the opposite being true for an evil character. A neutral character, on the other hand, won't be able to get the Holy Armor or Corrupted Scimitar, but can talk the prices for the Claymore and Shield down to a reasonable level. ---If you're good, [[NoPointsForNeutrality click here]]. If you're evil, [[NoPointsForNeutrality click here]]. If you're neutral, [[YouSuck click here]].

NoPronunciationGuide * This troper frequently hears "yakuza" pronounced as "ya-KOO-za". * As far as "Legend of Zelda" goes, this troper pronounces "Hyrule" as "Huh-ROO-lee" and "Deku" as "DOO-kuh". This troper also insists on pronouncing "meme" as "may-may" rather than "meem". ** Before SuperSmashBros Melee, this troper pronounced "Ganondorf" as "Guh-NAN-dorf". * When this troper's ninth-grade English class was studying ''WatershipDown'', the Lapine terms and names were apparently a real stumbling block for many, even though there ''is'' a pronunciation guide in the glossary. What's really strange is that some people had difficulty with some of the English names in the book, with one student pronouncing Fiver as "fivver," and the teacher rather inexplicably referring to Nuthanger Farm as "Noo-thanger Farm." * This troper had a serious problem with {{Pokemon}} names. Pokemon that keep their Japanese name in English are okay with me, but other pronounciations seem to be weird, like he pronounces Grotle like Growtul, but Pokemon Battle Revolution says GRAHL-dul. * {{bjchit}}: My last name, Chitwood, is appearently the hardest thing in the world to pronunce. Even though the best player in the movie Hoosiers is named Chitwood, I live in Indiana (The Hoosier State), and the area of Indiana that I live in is full of us, nobody ever gets it right the first time. *sigh* * This conversation ensued after my then-girlfriend introduced me to FinalFantasyIX: --->'''Me:''' Oeilvert. I love that name. --->'''Her:''' I love the way you pronounce it. --->'''Me:''' That ''is'' how it's pronounced.

-->(I pronounce it as ''oeil vert'', French for "green eye", which I'm pretty sure is what the name is based on. The reason I love the name is mostly that the diphthong in ''oeil'' is a particularly beautiful sound that doesn't occur in English.) ** However, I also have some less pleasant examples. On several occasions in high school I noticed that it seems fashionable for English speakers to affect complete inability to pronounce even the simplest of foreign names. For instance, in physics class, the name ''Szilard'' came up. Now, Hungarian "sz" is pronounced just like English "s", so there is '''nothing''' difficult about actually saying this name once you know that. Yet even after I told the teacher how to pronounce it, he and my classmates repeatedly stumbled over it. My English teacher insisted on pronouncing ''Bleistein'' as "Bliss-teen", ''Charon'' as "Sharon", ''Actaeon'' as "Act-ay-on", and so forth; these are also not really difficult compared to some of the foreign names out there! Considering these and many other cases, I've come to the conclusion that English speakers like to think of foreign languages as unpronounceable because it gives them a feeling of superiority... even though English actually has a ''far'' less consistent spelling-to-pronunciation correspondence than most languages. Head, meet desk. Repeatedly. * This troper once knew a man whose last name was Oyuunnaran. He actively enjoyed this trope by feigning shyness as a child and watching teachers and grown ups in general stumble all over the pronunciation. He hung a lampshade on it in college by noting that Mongolian names in general evoke this trope pretty much constantly outside of Mongolia. * Most of the names in the Bible. I mean, seriously, who can pronounce Mahershalalhashbaz, let alone spell it right? ** [[{{The 4400}} Mahershalalhashbaz Ali]]? *** Fun fact, not his original name. His birthname? Mahershalalhashbaz Gilmore * [[SenshiSun My family]] had had many a debate spent on the pronunciation of the dog breed "shih tsu" My mother and sister think it's "shit-su", with the latter using a MemeticMutation "shit-poo". I, the family otaku, say it's "she-zoo". TheOtherWiki and dog books agree with me. ** Annebeeche: Really? Based on the spelling I'd assume it's shee-tsu. Is the "tsu" syllable really a mispelled "zu"? *goes to look it up* Oh, it's Mandarin Chinese and it's "SHIRR-ts&#601;". My bad. ** It's Mandarin Chinese for "lion", and [[http://www.zdic.net/zd/zi/ZdicE7Zdic8BZdicAE.htm Shih]] [[http://www.zdic.net/zd/zi/ZdicE5ZdicADZdic90.htm Tsu]] is Wade-Giles pronunciation, which is long-obsolete. * {{Annebeeche}}: My legal last name, Bucko, is a complicated case of this. It's a Polish name, in Polish spelled Bu&#263;ko and pronounced "Bootch-ko", and despite being proudly Polish and raised by Polish parents, I was always taught the pronunciation "Buh-ko", to the point where the Polish pronunciation actually sounds wrong to me. Therefore non-Polish people pronounce it "right", while Polish people pronounce it "wrong", to my ears. As a pronunciation nazi, this dilemma really bothers me.

** Ironically enough, I pronounce all other Polish names correctly according to Polish phonetics. I cringe when I hear "-owski" (OV-skee or "OF-skee") names pronounced by Americans as "OWWW-skee". As much as I loved TheBigLebowski, I wasn't able to sit tight watching the movie for that reason. *** This troper wishes his grandfather had fought harder to keep his name's pronunciation from being anglicized when coming to Australia... its not easy growing up with the name Kocwin. **** [[HehHehYouSaidX Heheheh...cock...]] * This Troper's sister will never let him forget the time he discussed the mexican state of Chi-Hyuah-Hyuah * This troper's name is Marzwilk24x ______. Try to pronounce the first part and guess the last part. * On the local news at one point, the anchor had to read a list of the top-demanded toys of that year (2009, for the record). The list was full of Japanese names and other foreign, exotic-sounding names, and the poor guy stumbled from beginning to end. The most amusing example was his pronunciation of ''{{Bakugan}}'' as "bah-Coogan." * This Tropers first and last name both start with a J. She is of Spanish-Filipino descent. ONLY the last name is pronounced with a Spanish J (Pronounced as an h-sound). Doesn't stop my Brazillian coworker from jokingly pronouncing her first name as H-anina. * This troper's last name is four letters long and, apparently, impossible to pronounce ''or'' spell. The general rule is: you either spell it right and pronounce it wrong, or spell it wrong and pronounce it right. I love my last name, but for the love of god, why is this so hard? (Funnily enough, the name has two 'correct' pronunciations--one in English, and one in Russian. Many people incorrectly pronounce it the Russian way in English.) * I once heard [[Series/DoctorWho Dalek]] pronounced as "DAY-lik". I was drawing a picture of a Dalek in math class when I was bored and some kid stole the picture out from under me and said, "What the heck is a DAY-lik?" and I said "It's DAH-lek, you idiot!" * This Troper's "Self EES-mah-tism was hurt when the MIL-tia told the POG-roms to take a pint (short "i", like in "sink") my my taPOIca pudding." A good portion of my pronunciation errors condensed into a single sentence. (Actually, "Self-''esteem'' was hurt when the ''militia'' told the ''pogroms'' to take a ''pint'' of my ''tapioca'' pudding.") * This Troper's friend's last name is Streltschenko (Strelt-SHANK-oe) of Ukranian origin, which I think is a reasonably easy name to pronounce, being only three syllables and fairly simple to sound out. Cue many, many facepalms when a new teacher attempts to say it(and fails miserably) before settling on just 'S'. * This tropes practically learned english by playing videogames. Well, how to write, not how to spell. This didn't stop me from trying, which lead to things like ''Chrono TRY-ger'' (like tiger), ''Sunse-TREEders'' (Sunset Ridders looked like a single word in the tittle screen) and ''Devil MY Cry'' (this one is from a friend). * A name in this troper's family is "Vazquez". It actually was originally "Vzquez and is pronounced in most of Spain (This troper is half Spanish) as "VAHTH-kith." ''NOT'' "Vaz-kwez".

* There was a boy in this troper's class in middle school who wasn't sure how ''his own last name'' was supposed to be pronounced. * [[Tropers/GalenDev This troper's]] name is Galen. It's the word "ale" (like the beer) with a hard G in front (like Golf) and an N in back. Simple, right? The amount of times people have mispronounced it has lead me to start calling myself [[JackAttack Jack]] just to save trouble. * Can I add a language here? anyway the language Gaelic you preety much have to here it to say it when you are first learning it * This troper had two teachers who sort of induced this: ** The first one was Mr. O'Caollaidhe. The school newsletter announced him a term before he actually showed up. No-one had a clue what the name was; approximations were made. The typical one was '''oh-cal-AIDee'''. When we actually met him, he revealed the true pronunciation: '''oh-KEEL-ee''. I blame the Irish language (he's Irish-Canadian). ** Second one, Ms. Despault (another Canadian). Everyone more or less agrees this looks like it should be pronounced '''DES-polt'''. It's actually pronounced '''dh-POE''', with a schwa sound for the e. It also runs together so "Ms. Despault" sounds like "Mr. Poe." * This troper haves serious problems with Pokmon names. I always have pronounced Lopunny "Low-PUNNY" and then I heard in the anime "LOWpunny", while Scolipede was always pronounced by me as "S-cow-LEE-pehday", but actually is "SCOW-lee-pad". * My last name is Witebsky, which is Russian. Wi-teb-ski. A lot of people will mispronounce it, and some are understandable. Like, "Witeb-sky," or "White-b-sky." Though, with some mispronouncations, I wonder where some of the letters come from. There are people who will pronounce it "Wit-el-sky," or something to that effect.

NoRestForTheWicked [[redirect:TroperTales/TheInsomniac]]

Nosebleed * This Troper got a nosebleed when he walked on his female friend changing. But that was due to the fact that she punched him in the face. * ThisTroper is the only person he knows who has actualy ever gotten a sexually based {{nosebleed}}. He is very prone (to the point surgery is considered) to them when his blood pressure is raised. * {{This troper}} once had a {{nosebleed}} when being confronted with the naked female body, though it was most likely a coincidence. * [[ThisTroper This trouper's]] best friend had a {{nosebleed}} when she saw her boyfriend shirtless. Seriously. * [[@/{{Civanfan}} This Troper]] has been plagued by frequent, random {{nosebleed}}s his whole life. It only became a real issue in eighth grade, when his school had couple of twins from Japan who didn't speak a word of English as students. This being a crappy school, in a crappy city in a crappy state, they got treated almost as badly by the students as, well, [[ShrinkingViolet he]] did. Any chance ThisTroper might have had at helping or making friends with them went flying out

the window when for some stupid group assignment or other he was placed across from one of them and, to our mutual horror...well, I think you can guess. *Sigh* ** *scratches head* So real Japanese people actually believe that {{nosebleeds}} happen in place of... Something else? *** I have no idea. I just know the look on her face is something I'd like to forget, along with the rest of eighth grade. ** That sounds just like this this troper except that I had the blood vessels in my nose cauterized when I was 17. also my high school ran a foreign exchange program with a japanese school so there was often 30 or more japanese students around. * As with the guy above, I get frequent random {{nosebleed}}s, anything that'll get my heart rate, and therefore blood pressure up can give me one, including of course naked women. Worst time ever is when I was lying ontop of my girlfriend in bed and we both fell asleep like that, dried up[[{{nightmare fuel}} blood]] [[{{fetish fuel}} on her boobs]] in the morning. * [[ThisTroper This (female, pretty much asexual and almost never attracted to guys) troper]] once got a {{nosebleed}}, in front of her mother, while watching {{Naruto}}. When ''Guy-sensei'' appeared on screen. In her defense, she was ''very'' sick with a bad cold that had made her {{nose bleed}} before, but the timing (just as she forgot she was trying to convince her body to die already), the fact that the {{nosebleed}} was rather spectacular and the fact that she has always considered him a sexy beast made her feel stupidly embarassed and to this day she can't quite stop feeling that way. * This one once described a piece of fanart involving her friend's favorite male bishie..and suddenly she had a {{nosebleed}}. Which she was mocked for.. for many a day, though it's lost it's appeal as said friend just tends to have lots of {{nosebleed}}s period. * I'm a bit different in this department. While I don't bleed, my nose seems to run to the same effect. ** You are not alone. * [[@/SharmHedgehog This editor]]'s male friend got a {{nosebleed}} after hearing a story involving females. * [[ThisTroper This female troper]] has only ever gotten one unexplainable {{nosebleed}}...while reading ''SpiderManLovesMaryJane''. I would like to think that it's because Peter was drawn pretty darn adorably in that series, [[UnfortunateImplications but]]... * [[ThisTroper This]] [[BiTheWay bisexual]] [[ThisTroper Troper]], when watching the shower scene in {{Elf}}, of all things, got a {{nosebleed}}. Right by her otaku best friend and anime-illiterate boyfriend. After her otaku-friend told her boyfriend about the implications, neither of them will let her live it down... * {{ThisTroper This female troper}} once got a {{nosebleed}} when she picked up an [[color:orange:orange]]. I {{lampshaded}} it by saying "I didn't know [[color:orange:oranges]] make me horny" or something to that effect, but no one knew what I was talking about. * {{This troper}} was at a now-closed {{anime}} and manga shop, asking someone who knows the implications of a {{nosebleed}} about the differences between the Chobits {{anime}} and the manga. One of the

first points brought up was that the manga was "more suggestive." ''Right on cue...'' ** It should be noted that same {{troper}} has frequent {{nosebleeds}}, and any time that it COULD be assumed that it's due to arousal and someone notices it, he tries to say otherwise. * {{This troper}} has gotten a few random {{nosebleed}}s during school, once during a state testing, a second time during gym, then another just last Tuesday (date of 5/5/09) during history class, all seemingly after seeing my girlfriend-ish friend. * So that explains [[http://www.skyscrapercity.com/showthread.php?p=27126810&highlight=no sebleed#post27126810 things like this]]... * {{This troper}} had a male friend who had previously studied in an all-boys environment and had never come into close contact with teenage girls, other than his sister. One day his sister, who went to an all-girls school, forgot to bring her project to school and called him to fetch it for her. He went in the front gate and... BA-DOOM. * [[@/{{TheCleave}} This troper]] is known to have infrequent yet supremely random {{nosebleed}}s. One time still baffles him, as he doesn't know if it was random or... Anyway he knows a girl that fits nearly every mark on his 'girlfriend checklist (which isn't picky to begin with!)' that tends to be a MasteroftheMixedMessage. So one day, during biology, she was to give a presentation and decided to wear a very cute, nearly {{Moe}}, dress. Guess what happened... and he happened to be in a prime position for her to see... AND she is very manga/{{anime}} savvy... from that day on (2/13/09) she treated {{this troper}} in a bit more of a romantic light. Perhaps the {{nosebleed}} can be used for good! * ThisTroper tends to get a lot of allergy based {{nosebleeds}}. Once I knew the implications... I didn't think of {{nosebleed}}s the same way after that. * ThisTroper had this {{trope}} happen to him a twice in the course of a few years. Both while on the computer. And ThisTroper, mind you, is a straight, perverted-minded male. In my most recent incident, last week as of this writing, I made an outburst about it, complete with "Uuuugh,I can taste it down my throat, it's disgusting", and my sister remarked with "Just WHAT are you looking at on there". Both of us watch {{anime}}, so I got the joke dead-on. * ThisTroper has had this happen to him on about four occasions, although these occurred during a bout of the sniffles. The presence of his girlfriend was the straw that broke the camel's back. Strangely enough, he is more prone to sneezing as a result of becoming too "excited" too quickly, a phenomenon which is apparently not that uncommon. The fast increase in blood pressure causes the blood vessels in the sinuses to expand rapidly, which causes the nerves in that area to mistake the cause for an irritation. * [[@/{{bserkii}} This Troper]] was invited to a clarinet quartet playing at the mall by a girl he was into at the time. Her dad bought dinner for everyone (the quartet, and a few friends and family) and I took a seat next to her, across from her dad. Cue {{nosebleed}}. Making it worse - she's an [[{{GenreSavvy}} anime fan]]... and out of a dozen people, I think she was the only one who noticed why I left

the table... * {{This troper}} had a [[{{YaoiFangirl}} yaoi dream]] once and woke up with blood all around her nose. It's never happened since. * [[Tropers/SlvstrChung This troper]] was hanging out at the house of a girl he really fancies, when the girl's sister came in from the yard with a zucchini as heavy as a bowling ball. {{This troper}} now knows more about the proclivities of girl-he-fancies than ever he expected to! * [[ThisTroper This troper's]] sister gets {{nosebleed}}s often. We call her "the blood faucet". She coincidently got a {{nosebleed}} while my male cousin was taking off his shirt to jump into the pool. This led to some [[{{UnfortunateImplications}} Unfortunate Implications]] as said cousin was only 8. Fortunately, the frequency of {{nosebleed}}s have decreased. * Although I'm pretty sure it was just a coincidence, ThisTroper once got a {{nosebleed}} when she took off her [[UnfortunateImplications own shirt]]! * A friend of mine [[CrowningMomentOfFunny hilariously]] had her (mostly male) friends go through this. She just got up from a nap when she realized that she had to change her clothes. While she was changing, her friends wondered if she was awake and proceeded to barge right in. Try as she might to tell her friends [[OhCrap (including her boyfriend)]] to cease and desist and cover herself sufficiently, it was too late: [[CaughtWithYourPantsDown They caught her with her clothes off]]. Cue her female friends shooing the male friends out and screaming, "[[AccidentalPervert Perverts]]!" After she had fully changed and built up the courage to walk out and face her friends once more, she noted the large amount of bloody tissues that the guys pulled out. [[HilarityEnsues Hilarity ensued]] when she offered to hug them to make up for it--effectively [[BeyondTheImpossible making them need]] ''[[BeyondTheImpossible more]]'' [[BeyondTheImpossible tissues]]. [[UnderStatement She has...quite a strong effect]] [[CaptainObvious on guys, you see.]] * {{This troper}} was just roleplaying a {{yaoi}} scene on an instant messenger, and one of her friends actually got a nosebleed in real life just reading it. * {{This troper}} has very, ''very'' frequent {{nosebleed}}s, especially in dry climates. It runs in the family, apparently. Unfortunately, this attracts a lot of teasing from her friend who's aware of this {{trope}}. (For people who aren't, the reaction tends to be, "Grooosssss!" so there's really no way for {{this troper}} to win.) * This sister's roomate at college got a bloody nose while making out with her boyfriend. At first one would think nothing of it other than a weird coicidence....then {{this troper}}s roomate ALSO got a {{nosebleed}} while making out with her boyfriend. * I cannot be the only one who has {{nosebleed}}s of [[PandoraHearts anime]] {{yaoi}}. But this has happened before. Now you might remember me from the whole french-kiss [[FirstKiss first-kiss]] on AccidentalKiss TroperTales, so now, when I see girls in low-cut shirts, my nose starts acting up. [[PandoraHearts Alice]] got the key though.

* [[ThisTroper This tropette]] has gotten many a {{nosebleed}}, but most of them had to do with a lack of moisture in the air or [[TooMuchInformation possibly picking my nose too much]]. However, that hasn't stopped the occasional fangirl-reactionary nosebleed from happening (at least once from thinking about a CelebrityCrush, and another time induced by {{[[PerverseSexualLust PSL]]}}). I read in the article that nosebleeds sometimes come from [[{{Moe}} adorableness]] taken up to OverNineThousand, which comes as something of a relief, since that's happened at least twice. * This troper once woke up with a dreadful nosebleed during a sleepover at her friend's house. It was made even better by the fact that she couldn't remember exactly what she was dreaming about. * This (lesbian) troper got one while she was playing MassEffect and her (female) Shepard was flirting with Liara (who is [[GreenSkinnedSpaceBabe is pretty]] [[HotScientist much the]] [[{{Adorkable}} ultimate]] FetishFuel to this troper). Granted, it was at a time of the year when she usually gets quite a few nosebleeds due to changes in air humidity, but she still dreads what may happen when she gets to the sex scene... * [[Tropers.StevieC This troper]] used to regularly attend anime club at his local community college, and would usually sit in the back of the meeting room (an auditorium that had a HUGE projection screen PERFECT for use as an impromptu cinema) where there was a table he could set up his laptop computer to surf the web while watching anime. One afternoon late-autumn just after the first major dry cold snap, he suddenly got a persistent nosebleed in the middle of anime club. Ever since, his friends in that club have refused to let him EVER live it down, and constantly rib him by asking "just WHAT were you looking at on your web browser, dude?" ---Here's a tissue. Wipe away that blood on your nose and go back to {{Nosebleed}}. ----

NoSenseOfDirection * This troper is so bad that she has an actual GPS as a back up for the one built into her phone. ** Freshman year of college, I went to move my car from a parking lot at the edge of campus to my dorm on the other side of campus. Despite this being a two block drive, I still managed to mess it up and ended up on the other side of the city. * This troper literally has gotten lost in her own house before. (Especially when she first moved in...) Her friends are astounded at how she can never know where she's going. * Due to this troper's ability to follow (or lack of it) she once walked 12 blocks to go a distance that could have been 2 blocks. * One of this troper's friends took the bus to his girlfriend's house. After exiting the bus, he promptly became lost until it was pointed out to him that he was standing in her front yard. On another occasion, while driving through Little Rock trying to find Rave Theater, he ended up on Markham street. He then turned off on an

intersecting road... to discover he was now on Markham street! His nickname among his group of friends: Ryoga. * This troper more than once was able to get lost coming back from work to HIS OWN HOME. Not to look that bad, it happened a few times when the main street was blocked * A friend of this troper (hilariously a fan of both Hibiki Ryoga and Roronoa Zoro) has a sense of direction so nonexistent that she has actually managed to cause a group of people she was walking with to be lost in an area reasonably familiar to ''every single member of that group''. Twice. One assumes she is very convincing when she says "I think it's this way". ** Wow, that takes getting lost to a whole new level. ** I have a sneaking suspicion I know who you are; once, at a friend's birthday party, we walked to [[ItMakesSenseInContext a nearish playground]]. I decided, with a few others, to go back early. The friend whose birthday it was decided to stay a little longer. One friend said she knew the neighborhood like the back of her hand [[TemptingFate I wasn't sure about that, ]][[SchmuckBait since she is the most accident prone person in the group]], but she managed to convince me. Cue us calling for help over an hour later, in completely the wrong place, where the walk initially took about fifteen minutes. * I have Ryoga's sense of direction, and so does my wife. When we're both trying to get somewhere neither of us had been before, hilarity often ensues. (I even have a fake leopard skin headband like Ryoga's that I tie on my head when I '''know''' I'm going to get lost.) * [[{{Seanette}} I]] once managed to get lost on a college campus. With a map ''in my hand''. I have to avoid a particular freeway in my current city of residence, because nearly every time I take that freeway (unless I have a passenger who's better at navigating) I wind up in the wrong ''county''. * [[{{Nomic}} This troper]] has a hard time getting to a place he hasn't been before, even with instructions and a map. He also has trouble figuring out the location of two places in relation to each other (often leading to him being surprised when the location between two places was far shorter than he thought). He's very good at remembering routes he's used tho. ** [[{{Cydrius}} This troper]] is the exact same. ** As is [[StarlitOcean this one]]. I can memorise routes (though even that takes an active effort), but I don't have any sense of general direction. For example, I couldn't stand at one end of a route and point in the direction of the place I wanted to end up. I also always overestimate the time it will take me to get from one place to another. * [[DarkInsanity13 This troper]] typically has a good bearing on where she wants to go, and can usually get somewhere if she is presented a map...but she gets incredibly confused if you start dictating directions to her, particularly in terms of distances and which way to turn. She has no concept of north, south, east or west, and has to ''think'' for a second to remember which way is right or left. Don't ask her to give directions either; you'll get "turn this way * point* " or "go that way! * point* ", regardless of whether or not you can see. Otherwise...follow her!

** This trope now apparently applies to her dad and 17-year-old brother as well, though her brother knows himself well enough to know that if he's in an unfamiliar place without someone that knows where they're going or a simple enough map, he's better off to stay put and wait. While visiting Halifax, the family split up after breakfast to go on a harbour tour; troper and her mom would head to the harbour and get the tickets, while father and brother would pick up the cell phone and rain ponchos from the car and hotel room respectively. Bad idea, as troper had the map of downtown, and mother had a good memory and good sense of direction. Brother was sent to go find the cell phone in the passenger side pocket in the car door, ''couldn't find it'', and so went up the elevator to save himself the trouble of being scolded (which makes no sense, since he'd have to go back down to the lobby anyway). Apparently, father was coming down in the other elevator at the same time, and they just missed each other. Father waited in the lobby a couple minutes (or so he says), saw no sign of brother, and so asked someone in the lobby if they'd seen someone looking like brother leave. The old lady apparently saw a young man leave, so father decided to walk after him. In the wrong direction. Brother appears down in the lobby, having found no one at the room, still sees no sign of father, and so sits down and waits. About half-an-hour or more later, father appears at the dock, coming from a different direction he should have been, alone. Apparently managed to walk from the hotel to the Dalhousie Court House or something. Cue family freaking out, as brother tends to be not one of the most logical or rational of thinkers when among unfamiliar people or places. Three hours, a couple sweeps around the general downtown area and several changes in tour times (and an eventual refund) later, family decides to head back to the hotel in separate directions; not-directionally-challenged mother taking one route (getting a coffee on the way), father and map-inhand-with-decent-memory troper taking another. To shorten the story a little, brother waited in the lobby pretty much the entire time, only deciding to move to the hotel room in the last 10 minutes. Lesson learned? Next time father will not automatically assume that someone has left already, and if the family ever splits off again, each member will have at least one means of finding their way (whether it's a nondirectionally-challenged member or a map/GPS of some sort). * This Troper can't read maps or remember directions or street names. I don't know what streets are which around the area I've been living for 15 years. The only way she can get around is by memorizing the area, so I have to walk the route with someone else before I attempt to get around anywhere. * [[{{Desertopa}} This troper]] has a lack of directional sense so total, that he has, on numerous occasions, gotten lost in a straight line. He has also consistently gotten lost on routes he has already traveled, sometimes hundreds of times, when he finally attempts to travel them unaccompanied, and got lost in a mall countless times before finally being informed by his sister that the entire building was a circle. * This troper gets lost and confused easily without some sort of landmark to follow, or a map and compass. After recently trying to

explore San Francisco on foot, he ended up walking miles further than necesarry to locate somewhere to eat on multiple occasions, but found major (big and blindingly obvious) landmarks simply by walking towards them. ** Also, this troper has a friend with a similar sense of direction and commitment to it being right. Many a time have we argued over exactly where we ended up on a cycling trip, before setting out in completely opposite directions, both convinced we're right. When we take a third party, they occasionally end up stranded in confusion. * This Troper all over. He's unintentionally backtracked on the public transit system near his house multiple times, it was a few years living there before he could give directions home from the freeway, and he's gotten lost in a familiar city ''while receiving directions over his cell''. * The worst part of finding parking in San Fransisco is accidentally ending up in Oakland. Twice. * The worst part of driving to Oregon is accidentally ending up in San Fransisco. * This Troper has no sense of direction, it is a real pain when I find myself having to give directions to anyone. * This Troper has a friend who is always relying on him for directions in video games. Morrowind, Fallout 3, even linear FPS games like Jericho - he'll circle for hours if I'm not right over his shoulder. Shouldn't carry over to real life, right? So I invited him and a second friend (with a normal sense of direction) over to an anime showing two blocks from a subway station, and each station in our city has a map of the local area. 30 minutes after the showing starts, I get a cell phone call and have to direct Second Friend over the cellphone to the location. Second Friend blamed First Friend for getting them lost. First friend's excuse was that ''the map lied to him''. ** To be fair, some do. Never trust Mapquest. *** Second this. I was once helping a friend move, and made the mistake of trusting Mapquest's directions. After I got into the right ''city'', I discovered that an intersection I was supposed to turn at '''did not exist'''. I wound up stopping at a nearby pizza place and asking the counter guy for directions (theory being he'd know the area and I knew I was close to my destination). Once he stopped laughing at the Mapquest directions, he was very kind about giving me directions that actually made sense and got me where I needed to go. It's also not unusual for Mapquest to try to have me make illegal turns (going the wrong way on a one-way is popular with them). * [[{{Momonga}} This troper]] took a three-day school trip to Disney World in high school and got lost every day, eventually losing a shoe as well. She's been this way since preschool, where she was nicknamed "The Wanderer" for her tendency to meander into any open room. During her first year of college, she arranged to meet someone for dinner and (accidentally) gave him wrong directions, then felt very hurt when he took half an hour to show up. To make matters worse, her boyfriend is just as bad, and sometimes HilarityEnsues even with a GPS. * This troper has to actively restrain himself from going down the block, because it will just end in panic and anger. Relatedly, I got

lost while asleep. My family is...different. * This troper always knew she had a poor sense of direction, but had trouble proving it. That changed when her dad moved in with his new wife and she had to go there on her own. It went okay, besides wondering which turn to take on occasion. But when I managed to find the correct street, I got lost. Yes, people. I got to the correct street and after three minutes, ended up many, many blocks away. * sigh* * [[{{MissEntropy}} This troper]]'s sense of direction is so bad that she has repeatedly gotten lost walking in a straight line. The directional dyslexia has led to such nightmarish experiences as getting lost in a hospital, ending up in a pitch-black empty auditorium, and [[{{TakeThat}} being unable to get out of Portsmouth, Ohio for a full twenty-five minutes]]. * This troper sympathises with [[strike:[[TopGear Captain Sense Of Direction]]]] [[TopGear James May]]. She once asked a friend for directions back to her own house after a party (no alcohol involved) and was told that she was currently standing ''on her own street''. Getting home involved walking a mile and a half down one, single, straight road. In her defense, it was dark. * This troper can't get lost normally. However, ask her to give you directions, even read off of a map, and you are definitely going to get lost. * [[{{Gerusz}} This troper]] had a friend who could get lost anywhere ''with a GPS in hand and coordinates of the destination set''. ** This troper is the same, the other day whilst trying to find a route to College using my iPhone's GPS, I got lost whilst following it, even though it was entirely correct. * This troper has a notoriously terrible sense of direction, but the worst incident that she will never ever ever live down happened the first time she tried to drive back to college by herself after her very first break. The college in question was in Alabama. This troper was driving from Louisiana, taking an interstate route that runs pretty much straight shot to her destination, and is an east/west road the entire way. All she had to do was get on the interstate going East. So...with this in mind...it was only after two straight hour of driving...the point of which where she actually REACHED the Texas state line...before she realized that she had taken the wrong exit. She still gets ragged about this by her family to this day. * [[{{Gobolt}} This troper]] and a friend of his have joked about accidentally winding up in either Russia or Sweden whenever we spend any decently long stretch of time trying to get from point A to point B with a route we're even slightly unfamiliar with. Admittedly, the friend isn't too bad about it, but I am. The record thus far is starting from point A, heading west towards point B, and after 20 minutes, finding myself approaching point A... from a long distance to the ''east'' of point A. And I'd been to point B hundreds of times before! * While I was visiting a high school, I walked down a hallway the whole way and ended up at the same end of the hallway. I know because this end of the hallway had a staircase, while the other didn't (someone showed me there). I do things like this a lot, and tend to

blame it on [[{{Bizarchitecture}} non euclidean architecture.]] * This troper somehow manages to combine this with {{Failed A Spot Check}}. I get directions to somewhere, and not five seconds later I end up stoping to try and remember what the directions were. Or, if I make it to the destination, I end up not seeing the place I'm looking for. . .even if it's right in front of me. Blind even with glasses is my motto. * That's how this troper and her roommate roll - in a wide circle around where they're supposed to be. * When this troper gets lost in Baltimore or Washington DC, he has two rules. The first is to simply drive in a straight line until he hits the Beltway around the city. Once he reaches the Beltway (which goes all the way around in a circle) he can find his way home. ** The second rule? If you're about to drive into water (Baltimore's Inner Harbor or the Potomac River), turn. * This troper, trying to reach downtown by foot from approx. 15 minutes away, ended up downtown... in the wrong city. * This troper would need a GPS built into her. She can't tell anyone which direction to go anywhere, and is frequently hounded by her mother for not knowing what direction the doctor's office is. This troper has a firm belief that she has a reset button in her head whenever she goes anywhere. * This troper and her friend were walking to a tennis lesson in a smallish town that they had both lived in for all of their lives. The fifteen minute walk took them almost 45 minutes because this troper kept on saying "I think it's just a bit farther down this way," even though they had passed it already. This troper knew exactly where the lesson was, she just couldn't get there... Her friend, on the other hand, had been saying that they were going the wrong way for most of the walk. * Subverted in the fact that this troper can practically find her way to places she's never even ''been,'' just by instinct and a two-second glance at a map. People just never listen to her. She always has to find the way back to the start, ''then'' to the original destination. She's definitely the "I told you so" type, and although they always promise to listen next time, they never do. Needless to say, she gets lost a lot, and by no fault of her own. * This troper once got lost driving to his step grandmother's house. What should have been a quick 15 minute drive turned into a nearly 2 hour drive with everyone that was already at the house freaking out and wondering where he was. To be fair though, this was his first time driving to his step granmother's house and all others before, usually didn't pay that close attention to the street names. * This troper has managed to get comprehensively lost two streets away from the place he wanted to go, while in posession of a) a map and b) a phone connection to someone who knew the area really well. Later analysis suggested that he'd somehow been circling the street he was looking for for over an hour. He's also been known to get lost on the half-a-mile walk to his sister's house, on one occasion finding an entire park that the entire family knew nothing about (and that he was [[ItWasHereISwear never able to find again]], of course.) On another occasion, he was entrusted with the map while on a delivery job, and

carefully instructed the driver to go down one street, turn left, right at the next junction and so on. We got to where we were going ... only thing was it was practically across the road from where we'd started. It didn't look like that on the map. * This troper is an inversion. She has good enough (though not perfect) sense of direction but doesn't understand spoken directions. As in "go along the street thirty meters then turn left etc". She thinks it's much easier to go in a general direction then ask people. * {{The Mantis}} likes to joke that she couldn't find her way out of a paper bag. She has found every conceivable way to the local college and to the college. In her defense, she never gets lost the same way twice. She does eventually find the correct path... by process of elimination. However, her friends and family are continually astounded by how many ways she can get lost going to a familiar place (e.g. Grandma's house). * This troper's mother. I usually joke that she gets lost on her way to the bathroom, and that's not very far from the truth. * This troper's cousin. She attends lessons in a driving school for a couple of months, goes back to get a certificate and somehow can't remember how to get back home from there. * This troper is 100% guaranteed to get lost if he's going somewhere he's never been on his own, or if he tries an alternate route somebody suggested to a familiar location. Using my GPS just keeps me from getting lost before the halfway point. * This troper got lost in a ''straight'' hallway once, and no there were no drugs, alcohol, or anything unusual involved. She just got lost. * This troper is infamous amongst her friends for her nonexistent sense of direction. For starters, she didn't learn left from right until she was thirteen. She can't read maps, and she has zero idea how the roads in her home city of Phoenix work, despite the fact that they are a perfect grid with a predictable pattern. This has led to more than a few panicked phone calls to friends with better senses of direction to tell her where she is. Oddly enough though, she does just fine walking around her college campus, even though it's a lot more convoluted and chaotic there. That, and there's a large, distinctive mountain range in the north that you can see from anywhere on campus. * A teacher of mine once told a story about a former coworker who had to drive from Des Moines, Iowa, to Minneapolis, Minnesota for business. They didn't show up on time for the meeting, and called four hours after it ended from a phone booth in Wichita, utterly confused. * This troper is originally from TheWindyCity, which is so regularly laid out that you can see the street grid in the pattern of the street lights, from SPACE, with the only major deviations being the interstate highways. Introduce a curved road, and he will, invariably, have to redetermine his direction and location once he reaches the next crossroads, because his entire sense of direction is based around two point grid coordinates and being able to see the sky and skyline to orient himself. His first anime convention, he went as Ryouga Hibiki. Things did not go well. * This troper is normally not that bad, but there was that one incident. Me and a friend were going to hunt for food at a saturday

evening of a con, but everything in the vicinity was closed apart from the [=McDonald's=] where neither of us wanted to eat (this troper already ate his lunch there). Luckily, I had gone there by car, so we set out in search of pizza. We eventually, after a while of driving, got our pizza and were going back. It seemed to be going well until we started thinking that it shouldn't have been this long. We realized we had gone MUCH too far, and had to turn around. We had been gone past where we were supposed to turn and continued for 15-20 minutes before realizing. We decided [[LetUsNeverSpeakOfThisAgain we could never tell anyone about this]]. At least we also agreed that ultimately, the pizza was worth it. * [[SabreJustice This troper]] has a variant; I usually get where I'm going, ''eventually'', and almost always end up taking the longest, most difficult and embarrassing route possible. Even and especially when I've been there before. I don't read street signs. * With a map, this troper is capable of getting herself pretty much anywhere, but without a map... well, it's a whole different story. She's managed to get lost in her own hometown, several different libraries, her ''dorm,'' and in practically every place she's visited abroad -- notably, getting lost in downtown Sydney, repeatedly taking the wrong train on the Tube, and managing to lose her way in Chinatowns on two different continents. So... [[NoSenseOfDirection yeah.]] * [[FourtyTwoHz This troper]] is EPIC FAIL when it comes to reading maps. He can only get through with the driving instructions that Google Maps/Google Earth provide when you ask for a route. ** Are you me? * This troper's sister texted him directions to her house, starting from inner-city Melbourne. It went fine until I got off the tram in Brunswick, accidentally skipped over a line of her instructions, and walked roughly 20 blocks in the wrong direction before working it out. * This troper's sense of direction is so horrible, she got lost ''walking in a straight line.'' Granted, she wasn't sure that was where she wanted to go, but still. * This Troper's family once ''accidentally went to [[RoswellThatEndsWell Roswell]]''. We blame the [[AlienAbduction aliens]]. * Once got lost on the internet between ''two potholed pages.'' To be fair, the computer was acting up, but it was indicative of my sense of direction. * This troper once got lost on the TURNPIKE. She comes by her sense of direction honestly... 35 years ago, her father got lost on his way to his own wedding. * This troper gets lost in her hometown, a city with a sprawling area of ONE AND A HALF MILES SQUARE. She has also gotten lost in her high school (a building with one floor, only one hall, and no corners), her junior high (a straight hall as well, albeit quite a bit shorter), and a small restaurant, as well as in games. * This troper's sister is the embodiment of this trope. She'd get lost on a one-way street, and that's no word of a lie. She's even worse when she's playing video games. They have freakin' maps! And Pokemon isn't exactly hard to navigate.

* This troper has improved significantly from her first year of college, when she got lost in a small, open field for forty-five minutes. She also had to call her mother for directions back to Tennessee from South Carolina that summer, as she wasn't sure if she should get on the 76 E or W. Hint: South Carolina is on the East Coast of the USA. Tennessee is a land-locked state. * Many years ago (think about twenty five), my dad was a captain of a commercial boat. One of his crew members had a sense of direction so bad that, whenever she said to go left, the right way was nearly always to the right. How can one person have a sense of direction so ridiculously off? * This troper can memorize particular routes to places very well, which makes people think she has a good sense of direction. However she has no sense of how two places relate in direction or distance. If she has to take a detour or go to a new place, she quickly gets hopelessly lost. Once she and her friend got hopelessly lost in Detroit even with a GPS, printed out Map Quest directions, and her mom on the phone giving directions. Several times they almost ended up in Canada. * When this troper went to visit his old school once he got himself lost, but managed to, after a couple of hours and with some difficulty, find his way to a slightly curved highway that he knew would lead to his old school. It was then he decided to ask a passerby for how long he would have to follow the highway in order to reach the school, got the answer "About 15 minutes", and decided to [[TemptingFate take a shortcut]]. 20 minutes later he had finally found his way back to the highway, and decided to ask a passer-by how long he would have to follow the highway in order to arrive at the school, and got the anwser "Roughly 20 minutes"... This troper's mother has once likened his sense of direction to that of a toaster's... * This troper's best friend/future husband (we've actually agreed on marriage after we date other people for a few years) has the worst sense of direction I can possibly fathom. We live in a small city right along the Mississippi River, and frequently cross the river to the state next door. He can never tell me which state we're in, despite the Mississippi being a very large river. It would take a serious amount of obliviousness not to notice it, or at least the major interstate bridge you cross. * This troper has an excellent sense of direction. In an unfamiliar city, he has been able to navigate blocked roads, heavy traffic, missed turns, and detours just thanks to his ability to know "Okay, now it's over * there* ". Unfortunately, this nigh-miraculous ability only functions if he's ''paying attention''. And sober. ** He used to work in a lab that was at the end of a hallway. The base of a T. To get to the bathroom from that lab he had to walk to the top of the T, turn right, and take the first door on the right. Walk until you hit a wall, then take the first door. Simple, yes? He got lost... in thought and missed the door to the bathroom, found himself in a different hallway, in the room with the ice machine wondering why he'd forgotten his bucket. Then he recalled he'd intended to go to the bathroom. This happened on numerous occasions.

** Another time he worked for a community college with multiple campuses. One semester he alternated days of the week for two of them. Monday/Wednesday at 6 he was here, Tuesday/Thursday he was here. On several occasions he ended up at the wrong campus. Thing is, he only had to make one wrong turn to end up at the wrong campus. Campus A, turn left; Campus B, turn right. This turn was at the end of the driveway. This troper is so prone to getting lost in thought that in between packing up his bag and getting to the end of a twenty foot driveway, he'd forgotten where he was going. To be fair, he only worked at the one campus the previous semester, and that's the one he always mistakenly went to. ** We all enjoy stories of drunkenness, yes? This trope walked to the bars and got toasted. Then he walked home, missed a turn and kept walking. All night. Ever sobered up at dawn in a different city than the one you started drinking in? Without passing out in someone else's car? ** Fortunately, he has to be shitty drunk to lose his sense of direction. A friend enjoyed waiting until he wasn't paying attention and asking which direction they were going. He was invariably correct; it helped that the city was laid out on a grid orientated by the compass. * During the Second World War my granddad was a pilot stationed in Burma. One evening the base had a visit from a very sheepish-looking air crew asking if they had managed to reach Cairo. * Once went to a camp in Bermuda for 3 weeks, the camp was only a few blocks away from my hotel and I walked the same route every day for those three weeks...but I still had to have a friend or relative walk with me, because even to the last day I had NO IDEA where the camp was. * This troper. Made even worse by the fact that I literally can't read maps. I basically shouldn't be allowed to go anywhere on my own, as I can and do even get lost in places that I'm extremely familiar with and generally have no idea how to get to places I've been to hundreds of times. I quite often end up phoning friends in order for them to give me step-by-step directions to a meeting place... * This troper and his friend once walked not more than a few blocks away from his friend's house. On the way back, his friend asked which direction he thought the house was in. This troper, after a bit of deliberation, pointed to his right. His friend said, "Let me show you something.", and walked us in the exact opposite direction. We made it back to his house. [[EpicFail I fail.]] * Normally, I have a good sense of direction, except when I'm playing {{Morrowind}}. ** Why am I going [X] for half an hour when they told me to go [opposite direction]? * This one was relayed from this troper's mother: growing up in Taiwan in the 1960's, basketball was a new sport - no one was good at it, and not many more understood all the rules. As a result, scores were usually very low. One day, Mom's friend came to her in tears: --> '''Mom''': Why are you crying? --> '''Friend''': We lost a baskeball game in gym today. --> '''Mom''': What was the score?

--> '''Friend''': 2-0. --> '''Mom''': Who scored the basket? --> '''Friend''': Me. She had forgotten that teams switched baskets to start the second half, and had grabbed a rebound. * This troper has got lost walking down a straight street too many times to count. Once after splitting up with a friend she got told to "walk down this road and through the park to get to the university", from where she could make her way home on her own. She obediently started walking in the direction of the park. Twenty minutes later, she came back to corner of the building where she had split up from her friend... from a completely different direction than where she had started going. Another time she walked into a mall, realized she needed to grab something before going to the stores, turned on her heel and walked out the same doors she had entered through - and had absolutely no idea where she was. There is a reason she refuses to drive anywhere unfamiliar without a passenger who has a significantly better sense of direction. * This troper relies heavily on the maps in video games to tell her where to go. This is why she still hasn't beaten Overlord: she keeps running around in circles never finding the place she needs to go. If she exits an area she needs to find later, it's a safe bet she won't be finding it without running around like an idiot for an hour, at the very least. * My family and I went on a vacation trip in Washington D. C. We were driving back to the hotel one night until my mother thought we were lost, but my dad, the man that he was, preferred not to ask for directions and was confident he knew the way back. ... we ended up crossing into the Virginia border. * I have no sense of direction. When I was in New York City, I tried going to a party somewhere in Greenwich Village. You know... where the streets and avenues are no longer arranged in a nice, organized grid?! I walked out of the subway station and saw some landmarks that made me go one direction. After an hour of nothing but walking, I reached the next station... south of the one I had intended to go... which... after retracing my steps north... was actually only a block above the station I STARTED at. Bah! * This Troper will, almost invariably, get lost the first time he drives anywhere, even with a passenger who knows the way. Thankfully, everytime afterwards, he knows how to get there without needing a map or anything. Case in point: I was helping my girlfriend's family move (in an unfamiliar city, no less), and after following her parents' truck to the new house a few times, managed to get lost an hour away in the country, when the whole thing could have been avoided had he listened to her for the turn-off. * This troper was in the army, and never successfully passed a land nav course. He passed the one in basic training only due to someone accidentally starting a wildfire (long story). However, he's also seen people who are even worse. One girl in Korea plotted out her map points, checked her compass bearings, then immediately headed off in the wrong direction, towards the North Korea border. * My sense of direction is very good, but I can't give directions to

save anyone's life. I am, however, reminded of a mall trip with a friend with...well. She couldn't find the food court while we were on the escalator the led directly there, and at one point she said "I think the store is this way." I went "Well, we know how good your sense of direction is, so let's go the opposite direction." Three stores down it was there. And this was in a mall that is literally one long slightly curved corridor, presumably one of the hardest configurations to get lost in. * This troper is usually fine after multiple times on a route but is completely awful otherwise. First time coming home from college, he passed the on ramp by looking in the wrong direction. He found his way back thanks to directions from his mother, then later had to stop at a gas station for directions after taking the wrong exit. And this was with fairly obvious hand written directions on the seat next to him! Another example was coming home from the dentist, a normal fifteen minute drive. Somehow he got so lost that instead of turning left, he went across, did a semi-circle, and managed to get back to the main street further down from where he was initially. It got to the point where he was literally deciding where to go based on what the car in front of him did. Now he has a GPS. It doesn't help much. * This troper and her sister were driving to get this troper's glasses back. After we saw the place was closed, we decided to drive home. Somehow we got lost in on a road MY SISTER TOOK HOME FROM WORK EVERY FREAKIN' DAY. And since my [[NoSenseOfDirection sense of direction is about as good as hers]] and I couldn't [[BlindWithoutEm see ANYTHING beyond three feet]], we were pretty much screwed. And we somehow ended up in the ghetto part of Miami before calling for help. * [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Tropers/Pepper-Jak This troper]] has such a lack of direction, it's not even funny. It probably has to do with my dyslexia, and I believe the term for this particular quirk is dysgeographica. ... ... Last week I had an appointment at a salon. My brother had stolen my Sat Nav to go to Long Beach, and so I left THREE HOURS EARLY to allow time to correct any errors I made driving. I ended up taking a number of wrong turns, ended up 50 miles away from my destination, and was eventually ONE HOUR LATE for my appointment. Bless the nice hair ladies, they let me get my hair cut anyway. * This troper got lost twice on the school trip. Once in a museum, which consisted of a strait hallway and a gift shop, the other time on a night tour of the city. I still think my tour group lost me. * This troper moved up to college last year, with his first driver's license, and still has trouble getting around.... anywhere. On his way back to his old hometown for the 4th of July, he got lost trying to find the right highway... for an hour. He had to call his brother, who was in Washington D.C. (this troper lives in the Midwest of the U.S.) to give him directions via his iPhone. Once he got to the right exit near his hometown, he turned the WRONG WAY, despite having lived in that town for sixteen years. ---OK, let's see if we can find our way back to [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel No Sense Of Direction]]... * [[{{Baka}} You idiot!]] [[EverythingsCuterWithKittens This way!!]]

** No, [[TheThingThatGoesDoink this way!]] *** [[SharkTunnel This way?]] *** Maybe it's [[PinballZone this way...]] *** [[CaptainObvious It's obviously]] [[TrademarkFavoriteFood this way.]] *** Well, [[CrowningMomentOfFunny aside from the fact it's really this way]]. *** Oh ''come on'', [[NoSenseOfDirection it's this way!]]

<<|TroperTales|>>

NoSenseOfPersonalSpace * I can't show any emotion around my aunt. She'll literally latch onto my face for about 5 minutes. * This troper's grandma just ''does not get'' why I would have a problem with her hanging around, constantly patting me on the shoulder, and standing (or sitting) altogether too close when she talks to me. Or with her trachea-crushing hugs that I can't seem to escape my grandparents' house without receiving. (I think she thinks we have a lot more of a family bond than we actually do. And I'm [[HatesBeingTouched not exactly a touchy-feely person to start with]].) ** MINE TOO. Goodness, I feel like she's breaking my spine every time she hugs me. I try to escape before she can latch on with her steeltrap hands. * This troper is friends with short, touchy-feely people. This causes some interesting scenes where she'll turn around only to trip over a friend who she swears is hiding, fetal position, at her feet. * This one guy I knew in my freshman year (he was a senior) always hugged me when he saw me and would put my his hand on my shoulder all the time. I was mildly uncomfortable at first when I was first getting to know him, but once the mild [[StalkerWithACrush stalking]] kicked in I was freaked the hell out and tried to not be around him. He never seemed to get the message, even when I would ignore him as much as I could. Seriously guys, if a girl freezes up when you hug her and avoids you, you don't continue to make physical contact. ** Ignoring doesn't always work; there was nothing wrong with giving him a push or stating bluntly that he should stop it. This troper hopes that you reported it to the proper authorities because that sounds like a classic case of sexual harassment. Either that or it's a case of not being able to read signals but this troper highly doubts the latter. * With strangers, absolutely not. With friends (especially female), pretty much. And I'm a heterosexual male, but I swear it's not sexual. I'm just pretty touchy-feely, and guys usually aren't. * One of my former friends from high school was very much like this he would stare at me all the time even when I wasn't talking to him, and if I were on the computer or drawing he'd be right there staring at me and breathing his horrible rotten breath on me. * This troper might be considered as one but folks around her has

gotten used to it by the sheer amount of times she has flopped onto their backs, or hugged them... or flop across their arms... or their legs... I seem rather floppy... Maybe I have an [[IncrediblyLamePun A:drive]] to do so. * This tropers 21 year old class mate with autism tends to this. It would be okay usually, but somehow he can't stop. He does it to everybody, girls, boys...everyone! We tell him to stop...but it's a tragic case. * A dude in this troper's Psych class decided one day to pull up a desk, set it up so it's directly facing mine and try to touch my hands /sweet talk me. totally creepy because didn't know that dude at all honestly, and i already have problems with people touching me... * This troper, much to his friends annoyance. * This troper once had a college professor tell a story about a fellow professor: he was standing talking to the woman, and she would stand closer than he liked. So he thought that if he rested his weight on his back foot and put his other foot out in front of him, she'd respect the personal space bubble around his leg as well and keep their bodies a decent distance apart. No, much to the professor's horror, the woman practically ''climbed his leg'' in order to stand with their faces as close as she wanted them (and unless the woman was an AnythingThatMoves type, it wasn't just because she was attracted to that particular man, as he said she did it with ''everyone''). * I have a friend who believes that unless you are a victim of rape or domestic violence, then you have no excuse for not wanting people as close as physically possible. It took me months to convince her that sneaking up on me is a BAD idea, and she still doesn't seem to realize that when I say, "Don't do that", I MEAN "Don't do that." When she thought that my saying that I am very ticklish was an invitation to do so even after saying that I really, really hated being tickled, she was on the receiving end of one of my best Death Glares- after which I told her that I had nearly broken bones on the last person who thought it was cute. And she wonders why she never seems to see me much any more. ** This troper has a friend who used to act exactly like that, though she got rid of the habit by now. Back then, she somehow decided on her own that we were friends - while acting on this trope. Now, this troper Hates Being Touched. She probably always will. But until middle school, she hated it to the point of being afraid of crowds because someone might touch her by accident. Said girl only got the point after trying to tickle me, to which this troper reacted by having a panic attack and trying to stab her with scissors. This troper truly regrets doing so, but it's her fault. * This troper is this (because of AS, he tends to express emotion physically rather than verbally). His friends have gotten used to random hugs. * Me sometimes. * This troper, though I've learned to adjust my behavior depending on whom I'm with. Some friends absolutely hate being touched or having their personal space invaded, which sucks because giving hugs is ''awesome.'' ** Seconded! Yay hugs!

* This troper, definitely. My friends often get random hugs from me, and I was once toold to stop groping my friend. I was just trying to give her a hug, and apparently it looked like... something else. I'm also master(mistress?)of the Glomp. * This troper at times. I tend to give two-arm hugs and get very feely around people, especially people I like. I try to respect people who don't like being touched, but can occasionally be the one exception to their "hands-off" policy. This troper's friend is like her, but to the extreme, which interesting, considering she has occasional moments of TheWoobie. * This troper's friends. My best friend, though she usually doesn't like physical contact, decided to cheer me up once by ''smothering my face into her breasts.'' Though being bi, it wasn't all that bad. My other friend is Camp Gay and he's constantly hugging me, kissing me, shoving food in my face to eat, and generally just never leaving me alone. At first it bothered me, but now I think it's cute. * {{Tropers/Pendulum}} get like this, much to the chagrin and joy of my loved ones. * This troper was reading a book at school when a guy with an... interesting personality came up to her and was literally in her face as he demanded the plot summary. Add this to the fact that this troper DOES NOT like to be touched by people she doesn't like. * A couple people in Disneyland. Maybe it was ValuesDissonance or something, because they looked foreign and didn't speak English primarily. These guys were so close to each other they looked like siamese triplets...and in turn bumped the hell out of us. * This Troper is this trope- At school, I am constantly giving hugs, and poking people, even the teachers. * This troper's friend thinks that this troper has no sense of personal space. She flips out if I put my arm around her in a friendly way or something similar. However, she doesn't care if anyone else does it. * This troper has High Functioning Autism, and when I was younger I had a tendency to play with people's faces (often ears for some reason) while they were talking to me. * This troper is somewhat this trope. She loves hugging people and generally just being REALLY close. It doesn't disturb too many people, as she tries to regulate it mainly to friends. Of course, she's considered a personal space freak within her family, who plays this trope frighteningly straight in ways people do NOT want to know... * This troper does this and didn't realize she was doing it until she pissed off one of her friends that HatesBeingTouched. Even now that she's aware of it, she still isn't quite aware of the correct distance to be from people and winds up either standing too close or too far away. * This tropette has a female friend who is. Constantly. Touching her. It ranges from pinkie holding, to tickling, to subjecting me to MarshmallowHell. I don't really mind- I'm guilty of this myself. I pat people on the shoulders a lot, grab peoples' legs while swimming, and I used to literally jump on people when I was younger, a habit with I have only grown out of because I got to big for people to carry.

---Get your hands out of my pockets and go back to NoSenseOfPersonalSpace. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NoseTapping *This is a common, accepted method to signify you know something (have made your guess, picked up on the clue, whatever) in improvisational performance when, for some reason, you're not allowed to talk intelligibly.

NoSocialSkills * This troper knows a few people who fit this trope. The first is so utterly clueless with acting around people that he either annoys them or just frustrates them. I don't think he's ever had a friend, at least at the school this troper attends (incidentally, fitting both the CoolLoser and IntelligenceEqualsIsolation tropes, this troper has a lot of sympathy for him.) It does appear that he lack of social skills is a result of some quite severe bullying ealier in his life. The second person is introverted to the point of saying absolutely nothing (this troper has known him for several years, and would be surprised if he heard a hundred words come out of his mouth during that time.) ** And on tvtropes we can SPEAK OUT MY FRIEND! YEAH! * This troper has almost no clue how to interact with people. And she can't seem to go a single day without accidentally offending someone. ** [[{{Tropers/Joerc45}} This troper]] shares your sentiments. Speaking of which, he is an interesting variation of this trope. His [[YamatoNadeshiko excessive politeness,]] [[ShrinkingViolet softspokenness]], and erratic utilization of {{Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness}} nets him more than his far share of strange looks and social rejection. The truth is, he loves making friends and talking to people, but this very trope prevents him from meeting new people and garnering social adoration. * [[{{Tropers/YouMustDie}} This troper]] has ABSOLUTELY NONE, due to being unable to control some mental problems. And everyone he talks to mistakes it for utter stupidity. * This troper has sort of become a NoSocialSkills person recently. Before, my social skills extended as far as attending a school required it. That wasn't much, and I could get along with people there. Now I'm essentially a hermit in my own home who even turned down the chance to study at a university, partially because of social reasons. ** Pretty much the same situation, except I am having a go at Uni. It's very hard. Freshers week was absolute hell and I was reduced to tears multiple times out of the sheer stress of having to talk to so many people. I've now given up on trying to act like a social person and spend most of my time in my room. On the upside, I have plenty of time to do my work so I'll probably end up with a first.

*** [[{{Tropers/Joerc45}} This troper]] can relate to the above stories. He was supposed to [[TeenGenius graduate from High School between the age of 14-15]], but because of this very trope, and [[BreakTheCutie several]] [[BrokenAce other reasons]], did not attend college. Today, he is a borderline {{Hikikomori}}, but one who still [[LoveFreak harbors a soft spot for humanity]]. :) * This troper was home schooled all his life and lived a long way out of town and so never got the chance to develop almost any social skills. Though as a result I'm extremely self conscious about my mannerism. Though now I try to avoid any social contact for fear of doing something embarrassing. ** You sound pretty similar to me, minus the self-consciousness bit I don't care about having no social skills, in my opinion they're pretty pointless. (Then again, this troper failed diplomacy forever...) * [[{{Adeon}} This troper]] has rather rudimentary social skills. I can sorta fake better skills when I want to but I rarely consider it worth the effort and even then it's noticeable, if I have to engage in small talk for any length of time I go into a repeating loop. * This troper has never had much in the way of social skills, and is currently in a social skills immersion camp called "college". Obviously, it's stressful. * This troper is the only friend of this one person he knows. I've been his only friend for most of his life because he's shy and never interacted with anyone outside his family until he went to kindergarten. As such, I am the only person he talks to, which is bad, because I'm a little messed up the the head. ** He pretty much got his "sense of humor" from me. It mainly consists of dead baby humor, internet celebrity humor, and internet memes. Most of the people in his school don't get it so people just end up thinking he's weird. ** It doesn't help that he dresses like me, so people think he's emo when really he thinks: "I look good in black". *** It also doesn't help that it looks as if you're talking (and responding) to yourself. * This troper used to be incredibly socially awkward from the age of birth till about...oh, a year ago. She's been getting better, but it's still quite difficult. The most recent gains this troper is attributing to being in a relationship with two wonderful people, but she looks back at her behavior in high school and the first half of college and winces at how painfully awkward she was - like a puppy trying to make friends with everyone but having no idea of how to do it. * This troper just recently entered her first public school. No social skills+lots of people=OH GAWD. And apparently, I flirt with ''fourthgraders'' and ''teachers'' when I think I'm having a normal conversation with them. * This troper is friends with a guy who's a tiny bit [[CloudCuckoolander strange.]] He'll waver between intense hyper-focus and lost in his own head, friendly and funny to callous and unable to understand the most basic humor, and relatively normal to downright bizarre. I worried about this, so I talked to his family, and they

''swear'' that he was never abused, molested, neglected, or mistreated (outside of high school norms, anyway), and have tested him for a broad spectrum of genetic and mental disorders like Autism. ** Don't get me wrong though, he's a great guy. It's just that aside from a '''''very''''' small group of people, everyone is friendly with him, but there's definitely a wall between him and the rest of the world. * A large proportion of message board posters would fall under this trope. For a very depressing example of this trope, the 'Mad Stalker' message board on gamefaqs is the place to look. It's an unofficial dating advice board that has far too many really nerdy males thinking they have a chance with that hot girl because she asked to borrow something or made eye contact. It's so sad that it's almost not even funny. * This troper goes to school with an InsufferableGenius boy who seems to have no way of telling when he's being annoying. He speaks loudly and constantly, is a horrible know-it-all (he's very smart, and he lets you know it), keeps telling the same jokes even when it's clear no one finds them funny, won't take anything seriously, and criticizes everything and everyone. He seems to mean well, and this troper actually finds him a decent guy and an interesting person to talk to, but many of her friends despise him, and she can certainly understand why. He simply hasn't learned how to judge his own behavior. * [[@/{{Metalitia}} This troper]] is absolutely terrified of initiating conversations these days. I used to have friends, but my personality drove them away, and being rejected almost my entire life has rendered me unable to voice even a simple "Hello" (saying it first, at least) to any girl I find attractive, and I don't really want male friends anymore after so much screwing over. The worst part is, I could actually manage to be at least a LITTLE charming if SOMEBODY ELSE would initiate the damn conversation!!! [[{{Angrish}} ARRARHAHRHRHRGRHGGRHRGHGRHGH.]] * This troper can't approach new people and is afraid of initiating/ joining conversations with people unless they're good friends. When she talks to people, she often accidentally offends them or has awkward silences between sentences. She's always kicking herself after talking to people because of her terrible lack of social skills. * Most of you seem to still be in school. It gets worse, not better. Wait'll you get out in the world and find out your entire future, no matter what vocation you're into, depends on connections, not education. Having no social skills REALLY sucks then, because good first impressions aren't possible. For those of you reading this who don't have Aspergers -- trust me, you don't want it. * This Troper is REALLY bad at talking to people, even my friends that I have known for years. Also, I always have people giving me weird looks in public places, and I can't figure out why... * What little social skills I have are usually balanced out by my NotGoodWithPeople nature. When I just let myself go and don't think about a given social situation, or if it's a really quick thing like saying "Hello!", I tend to manage, and don't act weird at all. However if there is a way to avoid these situations, I fully embrace the opportunity to do so.

NoSparks * This is ''terrible'' in RealLife! A DoggedNiceGuy, if you believe him, has apparently fallen madly in LoveAtFirstSight with me, and even though he's nice, good-looking, highly intelligent, and even fun to be around, there are NoSparks, and I can't for the life of me explain to myself (or him!) why! [[LittleWomen Jo March]], I now understand ''exactly'' how you felt in "Heartache." * This troper had this happen with her first real boyfriend, and now it's the other way around. * This troper, terribly shy and a lesbian, was frustrated with her nonexistent dating pool, and in a confused and desperate move took the first other gay girl she met on a date... NoSparks. Don't worry! I found someone [[GeekyTurnOn much better]]. * This troper had it with her last boyfriend. Upon the advice of many friends (whom I have now learned to trust only with a grain of salt), I started dating him. He was a genuinely sweet guy who completely understood my need to be alone sometimes, and head over heels for me to boot. We had similar tastes in music, television and movies, but I just didn't feel anything for him. I broke it off when we left school for the summer. ** Exactly the same with this troper. He's hugely into animals, really nice, a perfect gentlemen, in chorus, same as me. I just didn't feel anything. * No Sparks is...well, it's inconveniently horrible. And it always seems to happen with the people who would be great boyfriends or girlfriends--the people who you click with on a mental level, those who share a lot of your interests, are good at proving a point, have a sense of humor, and just "get" you--who you would otherwise have no problem dating if the thought of sleeping with them didn't make you go "eh" or "...eww." * None of me or my friends have any sparks. [[CompletelyMissingThePoint Because we're humans]], and not [[{{Transformers}} Cybertronians]]. * This troper went on what can only be described as The Most Awkward Date Ever in college, after which we became fantastic friends. Of course, the next year, her boyfriend joined my fraternity so I wouldn't date her (I didn't, two of my brothers did). Since then, we've become best friends, seen long-term relationships end, lived together, and admitted mutual objective physical attraction, but... Less chemistry than a philosophy program. * This editor of the TVTropes wiki avoided situations like this by [[ObliviousToLove being (or acting) so uninterested and ignorant]] (even rude at times) that everyone would see the impossibility of any sort of relationship, and that nobody would dare to approach him. This method was constructed after having dealt with an annoying... uh, sawme-as-her-crush sort of thing... whatever you might call such a person. ---<<|TroperTales|>> ----

NostalgiaFilter ->"CURRENT state?! Pahahahaha, the music industry has always been this way, ever since its conception. It is an industry focused on selfperpetuation rather than quality. Mozart got in because he was a Child Prodigy and everyone after that got in because they were like him. The Beatles were a boy band and Motown was practically created in a guys basement. The industry has never, and will never be good." -->--''iamathousandapples, a troper'' * Averted with this troper, I like shows/movies/music from most decades. Heck, I could lament about TheTwilightZone as much as Avatar. I suppose that some folks don't understand that they grew up and matured. * This Troper will SOMETIMES laspe into NostagliaFilter, but considering the politics, boy bands and no Internet/anime, on second thought Pokemon and non-digital tv shows were WAY better back then... (puts on rose-tinted glasses) * I have a friend at school who says, no holds barred, Citizen Kane was the best movie ever made. He will concede that Pixar is crazy genius, and any drama with over 80% on Rotten Tomatoes is also amazing, but otherwise, any movie made 50 years ago is THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING EVER CREATED BY MAN, and otherwise it's all shit. The worst part is that he's only 14. * {{Jonn}}: In April 2009, I read a forum sig that said the poster was 18, and didn't know much about any shows that aired before his time ("around 1995ish"). With the exception of {{Pokemon}}, nor did the poster watch any of "this crap they call cartoons after about 2002". Go ahead, do the math. * Aside from what's mentioned on the main page [[ILikeCrows my]] filter was shaken up by the dubbing which was, at best, sub-par. * This troper generally hates new CartoonNetwork except for a couple shows. Mid-late 90's CartoonNetwork was the best IMO! ** Seconded. It barely qualifies as [[NetworkDecay "Cartoon" Network]] anymore. ** Me too. *** [[IGotBetter It got better.]] * [[Indigo_Dingo This troper]] would like to assert that, as a 20 year old, everything he watched as a child was incredibly stupid and inferior in nearly every way to modern kids shows. * Going back to the 1980s-90s TeenageMutantNinjaTurtles cartoon as an adult was a rather unpleasant surprise. This troper generally does adhere to the "cartoons suck these days" mindset, but finds the newer TMNT cartoon to be superior. Not perfect, but better. [[AvatarTheLastAirbender Avatar]] seems to be the only other recent (post-2000?) cartoon she has gotten into. Mostly she just tracks down oldies and goodies on Youtube. * This troper is one of those people who actually has this for things ''he wasn't around for the first time''. Although he maintains that since [[strike: Cat Stevens]] Yusuf Islam possesses musical ability and Simple Plan doesn't, this is justified. ** This troper is only 14 and loves 80's Hair Metal,(thinks any music

made after 1990 is complete crap) the origial Star Wars Trilogy, (The only good thing to come from the prequels was the Genndy Tartakovsky cartoon). Every cartoon I watch is from 1992-2005 ( Bruce Timm's DCAU, Teen Titans!, Spongebob, The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy,) and every comic I read is from the 80's (Crisis on Infinite Earths, The New Teen Titans, Watchmen,) * This Troper used to play an online game called Knight's Quest back when online computer games were a bit more primitive than they are today. He just recently found it again, and despite the near impossibility of beating the games as a non-mage, the bad interface, and it's relative shortness, he still can't convince himself that it's a bad game. (If you want to see it it, go to http://www.elpea.net/quest/knightq.html ). * As a very young boy, ''{{Series/The Mighty Ducks}}'' was my freaking ''life''. So you can imagine my excitement when I discovered an old videotape filled with nothing but ''Ducks'' episodes last year. And you can also imagine my shock when the show turned out to be merely ''decent''. Not bad, not at all, but certainly not the masterpiece I remembered. Before this moment, I (like many other people on this page) endlessly whined that today's cartoons are all crap, and everything was better when I was a kid. Watching ''Mighty Ducks'' again made me realize that no, they aren't, and no, it wasn't. ** [[{{Tropers/Ventisia}} Oh, hey, someone besides me]] who liked that series as a kid. xD * Averted with this troper: I'm well aware that every generation has its own amount of good shows and bad shows. Sometimes, I enjoy making fun of what I used to watch, and in the other hand, I like many modern series, cartoons and music. * I generally hate anything that comes out of Nickelodeon, Cartoon Network, and Disney nowadays. There might be an occasional show that comes out that I might like, but overall, I like my shows from late 90's, early 2000's. Especially all the Cartoon Cartoons on Cartoon Network. * Inversion: This troper, recalls a troll in a chatroom for a webcam channel in which someone was playing the ''Super Mario All-Stars'' version of ''SuperMarioBros 2'' who whined that video games should be put away and never played again once they're past their time. * [[GwenStacyWannabe I]] am horrible about this, I admit it. In particular, I have many times over stated my passionate hatred for the new CGI ''ThomasTheTankEngine'' and ''WinnieThePooh'', and I refuse to admit that ''{{Wishbone}}'' and ''TheMagicSchoolBus'' are anything but awesome. And don't even get me started on how CGI animation basically killed the use of 2D animation in filmmaking... (Only {{Pixar}} is allowed to use it, I say!) ** Amen to that * I'm not yet a legal adult (no more specific than that- sorry, scary Internet stalkers!), and was therefore born about when the SNES was released. Being thrifty/incredibly cheap (delete as appropriate), I have one and an N64, and am therefore in a position to compare the original Super Mario games with 64, and you know what? With reasoned consideration, I honestly prefer Super Mario World to Super Mario 64. There's something about the combination of simplicity with surprising

difficulty (you hear me, Chocolate Island Ghost House?) that works. Plus, in the N64 version, you don't jump on things anywhere near enough. * [[{{Lurkerbunny}} This troper]] [[TroperTales/BreakTheCutie has had a lot of horrible things happen to her in the past 10 years]] (and indeed has seen terrible things happen to the entire world. Not that terrible things hadn't happened before, but September 11th shook up the whole world and the lives of everyone in it). Thus, she is a bit offended with the implication that her fondness for her past is a "delusion". Not to mention, well, this so-called "filter" isn't entirely inaccurate. Come on, only the dumbest teenager would believe that SeltzerAndFriedberg are superior to MelBrooks or TheZuckerBrothers, that ''Literature/{{Twilight}}'' is superior to ''The World According To Garp'', or that TheJonasBrothers are superior to TheBeatles. Yeah, so some stuff in the past was cheesy. [[GuiltyPleasures Some people like that]]. And there is a big difference between today's bad movies and yesterday's bad movies: There is way too much reliance on toilet humor today. ** Gross-out humor is a CyclicTrope;it'll fade away in time. There's nothing new under the sun, and you just cherry-picked the worst examples from this era, and best from your era. SturgeonsLaw applies to your era as well. There just wasn't any internet to quickly spread the horrible crap back then for generations to remember. Also, what's not to say that some people like the crap now as a GuiltyPleasure as well? Some of the stuff in this era sucks, sure... ''just like the stuff in every era before.'' The problem with human memory in this regard is that it tends to archive only the more significant memories and dump the less-significant ones. You're more likely to remember either spectacularly ''awesome'' or ''horrible'' memories than anything mediocre or average, and you can even ''block'' the horrible ones. Yup, "filter" is entirely accurate, I'd say. *** Well, I still don't like this trope's name, as it seems to imply "You have fond memories of shows from your childhood? LOL YOU'RE DELUSIONAL!". It seems to present nostalgia as a bad thing, which is goddamn '''isn't'''. Everyone has the right to like shows/films/whatever that make them happy, even if other people don't like them. **** You have a point on the name, I guess. I looked at it and thought "it's a filter that prevents anything ''not'' from fond memory and your childhood from getting in", which may be the reason why nostalgia gets an undeservedly bad reputation from this, even though it's the filter that's responsible. Nostalgia itself is ''good''. ''There's nothing wrong with reminiscing the good things from your past.'' It's ''filter'' that's a seductive liar. **** It's not delusional to still enjoy things you did as a kid. (If likely from a more emotional standpoint than an objective one.) The filter is the idea that ''standard'' of quality is lower, which everyone complains about. There are good years and bad years and some accomplishments that can't be matched, but the idea of any medium being downhill is skewed. This is generally born out that someone from a previous generation will complain about the things ''you'' like. It's especially evident in cartoons because well, they're usually made

for kids. How is a grown-up going to enjoy them as much? ***** Ehh it all depends on opinion with the music thing IMHO {{Coldplay}} is much better than anything {{The Beatles}} ever made. **** I don't think the trope is saying it's bad to look back fondly on the shows you used to watch or the games you used to play. The NostalgiaFilter comes up when those games or shows are ''all'' you like, ignoring their flaws and placing them on a pedestal while simultaneously exaggerating the flaws (and ignoring the strengths) of modern media simply because it's modern. Like your grouchy grandfather who refuses to watch movies in color because they weren't like that when he was in the prime of his life. You can say modern movies are bad because they gave us ''DragonballEvolution'' while older movies are good because they gave us ''CitizenKane'', but comparing the worst of today to the best of yesterday is a very weak basis for a reasonable argument. By that rationale I could compare ''{{Inception}}'' to ''TheSinisterUrge'' and make the opposite point. * This troper rarely watches Nickelodeon anymore simply because the only good show they air (that isn't on Nick At Nite) is TheFairlyOddParents. I've been known to watch the cartoons I loved as a kid and they're still as wonderful as I remember. RockosModernLife is way better than Fan Boy and Chum-Chum. TheAmandaShow is better than BigTimeRush. * [[{{AJTheBlackDragon}} This Troper]] is an subversion of this trope, as I believe that things have gotten better with time, especially video games, movies, and TV are concerned. To me, TheNineties sucked compared to most opinions, as I remember things like the OKC bombing, Columbine, the incredibly ridiculous White Water and [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Year_2000_problem Y2K]] issues, and all the [[MascotWithAttitude crappy Sonic rip offs]]. Oh yeah, and [[TheInternetIsForPorn internet]], as my step-dad was an abusive pervert. Of course, I was heavily influenced by my parents, who grew up mostly in the 60s and 70s, and my older cousins who were children of the 80s, although they all taught me that I should embrace the change that comes with time. So really, TheEighties I feel are better than the TheNineties, and the current upcomming of the decade I feel looks hopeful. * [[{{Obsidian}} I've]] found that these things run in cycles, at least when it comes to animation. You get about a decade, give or take, of good, quality animation, followed by another decade of utter crap, then things start to get good again. The 80's, for example, generated primarily watered down crap, while animation of the 90's (Batman TAS, Gargoyles, Exo-Squad, etc) was quality. Now, we are in another slump, where we have largely crap, (with a few notable exceptions), but with another golden age of animation on the horizon. * This troper calls a version of the NostalgiaFilter "H.S.S", or "High School Syndrome". Several of his classmates were saying "Man I wish we had year-long schools, I mean I'm so bored in the summer". Wait a sec...We've only been in summer for a little over a week, and you already want to go back to school? Dude...you spent the entire months of April and May ranting about how much you ''hated'' school, how ''dull and monotonous it was'' doing a bunch of worthless garbage that has no place in the real world and how much you wanted half the

student base to be shipped to an island in the pacific ocean. You actually ''considered committing suicide'' because you felt so rejected and actually sympathsized with the columbine shooters. Now that school has started...about two weeks later (Sometimes less)...the ''exact same people'' are counting down the days on their fingers until school gets out or until the next three-day weekend because guess what? They hate school, how dull and monotonous it is doing stuff they'll never use, and think half the student body should be shipped to an island in the pacific ocean. It's just a neverending cycle... ** My dad is even guilty of this. "Man, I loved my high school days". According to the grandparents and your brother, you'd fantasize about beating the shit out of the student base or graduating to college early, you hated school that much. *** I'm not actually sure those two are mutually exclusive. This troper firmly remembers fantasizing about beating the shit out of the student base, but he loved highschool. Mostly because of that. **** I doubt you tried to get yourself emancipated from high school only to be turned down like my dad did. ** This troper has some serious HSS. Despite despising every airheaded bimbo, every dumb jock, every sadistteacher (mind you, my school is composed pretty much ONLY out of these three people), she finds herself practically pining to return to the year before and romanticizing every cram session. **** Averted with this troper - I considered high school as nothing special, and probably one of the least important periods of my life. Although compared to university study, high school was definitely easier... * This troper hates a lot of modern music and loves stuff from before her time (1980's). Now, it's not all that way, of course. But still, there's a lot of whiny songs on the radio where the young "talents" sound like they are vomiting in the microphone. She can't even imagine turning on the radio in the 60's or so and hearing nice music all the time. If I ever hear that song that whines about I'M HERE WITHOUT YOU BAYBEH I'm throwing a scorpion at the radio. ** The filter refers to how it's easy to think of an era as being better when the dregs of it are being forgotten. I would give you a week of listening to a radio station before you went insane. *** Considering the radio at work, I'd welcome the change. Of course, that radio is really a bunch of recordings on a vague loop. I'd be happy to never hear Nickelback's Photograph song ever again. * [[{{Nerrin}} This troper]] occasionally tests his NostalgiaFilter. Aside from one or two things, it is easily destroyed, often accompanied by cries of, "What was ''wrong'' with me back then?!" * This troper is 14 years old. He thinks the 80s had the best music(I love hair and thrash metal) and would've been just fun to live in. A lot of what he watches/reads was made in the 90s. * This troper does not like the new Disney Channel. For him, the channel died after SoWeird ended * This troper tested the nostalgia filter around the original Halo with extreme brutality. I went online to blood gulch and started comparing things to their current generation analogues. Here's what I

learned: the pistol was about as accurate as the Halo 3 AR, the warthog was slow as hell, the Assault Rifle was borderline worthless garbage, and the pistol was worse than even the fandumb-hated D.M.R. of the beta. * This troper once read a forum post in which the OP complained about how corny the "new ''Goosebumps'' show" was, and how the 90s series was much better. What he didn't realize (and what he got mocked for) is that there ''was no new Goosebumps show'', and he had just seen reruns of the old show. * [[@/BonsaiForest This troper]] looked up some of his favorite cartoons from his childhood (the 80s), and discovered to his horror that they sucked! Somehow, when I was younger, the cheesy jokes and corny plotlines of 80s cartoons were bearable. I just ignored the dumb jokes (I assumed that they were only thrown in out of obligation to include a humor quotient - no, seriously), and enjoyed the plots, even when they did have obvious holes which sometimes annoyed me. But all the shows are intolerable to adult eyes. On the other hand, a lot of good video games existed back then, that are still fun to pick up and play today. Yet, there are some downright fantastic games these days (like ''KingdomHearts'') that simply couldn't be done back then! So, ultimately, the past had good games, and so does the present. But the past also had bad cartoons, and so does the present. Today's cartoons are less story-driven than the ones in the 80s, but the stories of the 80s cartoons weren't that good anyway. * This troper is into music from between the sixties and the eighties, and had this trope averted ''hard'' by way of her dad and his internet radio thingy. It has stations for various decades' music, and she thought the 80s station would be better than the mostly-dreck modern or genre-based ones. ''Nope.'' No NothingButHits for these guys. * This troper has a weird form of Nostalgia Filter. Games that he played a minimum of 6 months ago that he liked are "BEST THING EVAR!", until he plays them for a week then they are just "good". He stopped liking some animation when he was about twelve to thirteen, but one of the few animated shows that still keep their filter are TheSimpsons, and [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Series/Dilbert Dilbert]]. Music in the 60's ranges from [[PinkFloyd Good]] to [[BobDylan amazing]] to [[TheBeatles "BEST THING EVAR!]]. 70's has some good rock like TheWho and TheStooges, but where pop began to go downstream. The 80's has some terrible hits in his opinion (but then again hearing the same songs for fifteen years does get annoying), but can admit some music is good. The 90's has terrible pop music, but the Grunge scene redeems it in his eyes, along with DaftPunk. Modern music can be [[Gorillaz great]], but most of the well known stuff is shit, the indie scene can produce some good bands but believes it is too pretentious. And on another note he would like to say that the 90's has the best looking electronics of all time, in fact there was an iPod could look like a classic iMac G3 then he would buy it in an instant. This troper would also like to note that he is still technically a minor. * This Troper was born in 1987. As a kid, I watched Power Rangers. Had my aunt tape it when I had to miss an episode. I am 100% aware of how stupid it was and hate myself for ever having liked it, regardless of

my age, and hearing other people my age talk fondly about it just confuses me. This is because I had two older sisters who got lots of sick, sick pleasure watching the tapes, even after I got out of the Power Ranger phase, just to point out how bad it was. And how stupid liking it made me. Nothing gives you a sheering dose of reality like ridicule. On the other hand, I have very fond memories of Hey, Arnold, Rocko's Modern Life, Samurai Jack, and Dexter's Lab. But even then, I can still get into them newfangled new cartoon shows- I love Avatar and Phineas and Ferb! * This troper is convinced that there are very very few actually good cartoons, mostly due to the Animation Age Ghetto. Sure, there are a few gems from each generation, but anyone who says modern cartoons suck needs to rewrite that as all cartoons suck. Oddly though, there actually is some truth to the claim that cartoons are getting worse. If you go way back to the really old cartoons (before most people with a nostalgia filter were alive) you'd find that there was a lot more creativity going on. It wasn't necessarily better, but back then they were more free to experiment. Also it is true that Disney seems to have lost its touch, which is sad since for a long time it was one of the last bastions of good entertainment for the whole family. Now that job has been left to Pixar, and although they seem to just be getting better I'm not sure that one company can keep family entertainment alive on its own. * Maybe it's nostalgia filter, maybe it's something completely legitimate, but this troper has always thought that the entire look and feel of software and computer games made in the 90's has this completely blindsiding charm about it. Chunky 3D models, low resolutions, MIDI soundtracks, you name it, it all adds to it. * [[PentiumMMX2 This troper]] does sometimes test this by revisiting a TV series he hasn't seen in years. From my experiences, some hold up well (DarkwingDuck, AreYouAfraidOfTheDark, most episodes of {{Rugrats}} prior to TheMovie), some still survive as a GuiltyPleasure (PowerRangers, {{Anime/Pokemon}}), some I simply can't watch them without an urge to {{MST}} it ({{Goosebumps}} being a prime example), and some have become unbearable for me (CubixRobotsForEveryone) * [[{{Tropers/Luna87}} This troper]] is fond of pulling this on her kid brothers. I tell them various things like, "I miss the old days when writers weren't so obsessed with being 'hip and edgy' that they forgot to make something good" (for the record, my three younger brothers, ages 8, 11, and 17, like stuff like {{iCarly}} [someone shoot me], {{Chowder}} [not a terrible show, but by no means good], and {{Family Guy}} [shoot me again]). And I understand if they think I'm just being a curmudgeon, but I watch old TV shows (Salute your Shorts, All That, Kenan and Kel, Rugrats, and Rocko's Modern Life) from my childhood, and they still hold up and are still funny to me. Now if I want to watch TV, I had better like mean-spirited humor (and no other kind), overly-sarcastic filler (less is more, people), and people randomly screaming at each other. Thanks, but I'll stick to my documentaries. * ThisTroper has quite literally told an 8 year old kid that "Back in my day, you only had 150 {{Pokemon}} and when you caught them all, your game was over and you damn (never used it in front of the kid,

but I insert "damn" when retelling) grateful for the chance to play." All because the kid tried to tell me [=FireRed=] was superior to Red. Sure, the original Pokemon games were glitchy pieces of crap games that made one wonder if the beta testers were sleeping, but they were OUR glitchy pieces of crap games, [[{{Firefly}} gorram it]]! ** I object to the "piece of crap". Remember ''[[TropeNamer The]]'' [[TheMissingno Missingno]]? *** Missingno? You mean the pokemon that either cloned a million items or absolutely screwed up the game? Yeah, you just ''know'' that if there was a Missingno in ''PokemonBlackAndWhite'', or if it were even ''half'' as glitchy as red and blue, it'd be called out on it. I can respect red and blue for being good game boy games, but today, they're practically an ObviousBeta for Gold and Silver and are ''hideously'' imbalanced. ** [[{{Tropers/Ventisia}} This Troper]] who grew up in the R/B/Y era (and still plays and loves Pokemon old and new) can't stand kids who love the new games and disrespect the classics. I once had an eleven year-old girl showing me her "collection" of Pokemon stuff, and when I showed her my first gen games using my GBA she said "She only has a DS with two screens," and "This game is weird..." and stuff like that which made me want to facepalm. When she showed me her Pokedex poster, I gestured to the first gen Pokemon and told her that there used to be only 150 Pokemon. She literally stared at me open-mouthed in shock. ** [[{{Tropers/RayneCyro}} This troper]] Also grew up in the R/B/Y generation; hell, Blue was my first Gameboy game, and second video game overall (after {{Diablo}}, but... we'll not talk about that...). But I'm in complete agreement with the person two posts above; R/B/Y does NOT age well. I'll admit, when I first got it, I loved it! ...... At least until Gold and Silver came out. I could tell something was different pretty much from the first ten minutes playing Gold, but I couldn't put my finger on exactly what it was, even all the way up through beating Red. I put Blue back into my GBC a while later, and it was around then I realized what was different about Gold; a lot of the glitches in blue which I had previously failed to really recognize as such were gone, I could actually hold my own against a psychic type, and I was just overall enjoying it better. So yeah, lynch me for heresy, but I have no intent on playing Gen 1 ever again, especially since the remakes exist. ** Although this Troper technically grew up in the RBY generation, she didn't get a Game Boy or any of the games before her 9th birthday, when she got Pokmon Crystal, and as the years went by, she picked up every new gen of games(including remakes like Leafgreen and Soulsilver), still enjoying them just as much as her first. To this day, Johto and Hoenn are her favorite generations Pokmon-wise, and I still like the newer ones... though by then, everyone I talked to at school and most other places only liked Red/Blue/Yellow(''possibly'' Gold/Silver/Crystal too) and hated the new ones for "ruining Pokmon". (Note that most of them never played anything past RBY, and some of them probably were those people that confused the anime with the games) Then, shortly after Diamond came out, I decided to get Blue when I was able to get it at a very low price, just to see what I had been missing... by my opinion, not much. When newer games were able to

get me the same experience, with an improved gameplay(and I was able to get the Kanto poks with Leafgreen)... it wasn't all that great. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't horrible by any means, but just majorly overrated in comparision to the newer games. Plus, I find most gen 1 pokmon designs to be too plain and boring, but that may just be me. * This troper avoids testing her nostalgia filter for just this reason, with one exception - ''MisterRogersNeighborhood''. Which sends me immediately back to the comforting, pre-9/11 days of her youth, and is just as good as I remember it, if not better. * [[{{Deityofnaught}} This troper]] keeps meaning to test their Nostalgia filter in regards to stuff like say, {{Yu-gi-oh}}, as they are not certain that they would like it as much now. They also developed an interesting case of this regarding school in all forms, as they remember clearly that they found it highly unpleasant (and still do) but still get a warmish feeling thinking about it because of the bits that weren't (or were, in some cases). Somehow, those are what they remember first, and it makes them miss what they ''know'' they wouldn't otherwise. * A local video rental store went out of business and [[{{Stinkoman87}} This Troper]] picked up the first three episodes of Pokemon. He forgot just how hokey the dialog was back then. * I don't ''have'' a NostalgiaFilter, I'' '''am''' ''the damn NostalgiaFilter. Video games? Better back before the first-person shitter became my own personal [[TheWesley Wesley]], all the games now have badly designed controls (hands should be symmetrical and balanced or nearly so on the controller except in rare cases of temporary camera control, no exception) and [[RealIsBrown ugly brown and gray graphics]]. Cartoons? There's too much wacky crazy shit that seems like a giant [[BLAMEpisode Big Lipped Alligator Series]] and not enough epic (if heavily MerchandiseDriven) stories of the battle between good and evil or [[HumongousMecha giant robot anime]]. Movies? The last one I was extremely active in wanting to go see, before TheDarkKnight, was [[RevengeOfTheSith Star Wars Episode III]]. TheDarkKnight was the only one I cared about since then. [[DieInternet The Internet has done too much to weaken the surprise of things]]: before the rise of the new media and fall of the old we heard about a game in a magazine or two and were then surprised when it came out amazing; after the coming of the Internet we watched its development intently online and then weren't able to savor the game correctly because we knew everything that was going to be in there. Every network I used to watch has [[NetworkDecay decayed into unwatchable garbage]], or at least I'm feeling a bit of TheyChangedItNowItSucks. The only thing that I can actually perceive as getting better is the Pokmon games (aside from the [[RidiculouslyCuteCritter more recent monster designs]] and [[DorkAge Generation 3]]). * Is it weird that I have strong nostalgia for things from the '70s despite being born in 1990? Blame my parents for raising me on everything from that decade (and on British comedy from the early '80s). Of course, it doesn't hurt that all the programs that were on CartoonNetwork when I first got cable as a kid were '60s and '70s cartoons. I've been raised with DecadeDissonance! * Subverted with this troper. In the case of PowerRangers, I was there

from Day One, but I consider Season 1 to be one of my least favorite seasons, and Zeo is the best. With {{Pokemon}}, I started when there were only 150 Pokemon and Generation II was in the works, but Generation III is my personal favorite, with my favorite Pokemon being Gardevoir. Furthermore, my favorite decade is the '80s, even though I was born in 1986 and missed most of the stuff firsthand. My favorite video game system is the {=DS=} (as opposed to the {=SNES=}). However, I don't watch TV anymore because everything is garbage and all the good shows are gone. * I rewatched the early MMPR, and wondered how I never noticed the bad acting, DawsonCasting, and bad CGI as a kid. Still love every damn second of it. Part of it might be that I better appreciated Jason and Tommy's fight choreography, seeing how they mostly used stunt doubles in the Disney era. Oh well, I appreciate that Saban picked actual martial artists over actors, and at least the acting got better over time. * [[Tropers/ShadowStainedSky This Troper]] averts most of it, simply for the fact that he can't remember what happened two weeks ago, let alone what happened when he was ''eight''. He was born in the early Nineties, the pinnacle of modern Internet-based nostalgia, so he only lived in it for a few years, and he can't ''remember'' those nine-odd annuals. Good thing, too; the web has allowed for me to have a better life than I did as an antisocial, reclusive and arrogance-throbbing child/pre-teen. With the Nineties, those chances would've been ''shot''. Still, the first generation of Pokemon remains his favorite (despite the massive bugs and the fact that he still likes the fourth gen), and most of his music selection either comes from pre-1982 or Dream Theater, so he doesn't avert it as he could; but, rejecting this decade (which he ''still'' protests to have ended in January, 2010) might as well be giving that pretentious child a chance to resurface. * [[Tropers.CalamityJane This Troper]] cannot remember a single piece of media from when she was younger than 9 years old, up until she bought ShadowTheHedgehog for her tenth birthday. That is the only piece of media she remembers, and she has always thought that it was a great game, but only because it was a good way for her to be introduced to the SonicTheHedgehog mythos; you could decide who this 'Shadow' guy was, and then you could learn about the other characters and story-lines through him. At least, that is what she thinks. Also, She wishes that the [[TransformersGenerationOne Geewunners]] would just take a good look at the actual first two seasons of G1. Yeah, go through all that terrible animation, cheesy lines and characters, flat and bland plots, and just plain weirdness. The only episode she actually enjoyed was 'Make Tracks' for its absolutely wonderful first half of the plot. But then the Gheddie's Brothers showed up and the entire thing went downhill. You just can't win. * [[Tropers.{{Mack}} This Troper]] has a working NostalgiaFilter for music, where I don't go out of my way listen to anything made after about 2002 unless it's connected to a musician or band I knew before then. The stuff that comes after that is generally from tv shows or fanvids or recommended by friends, and even though I'm loathe to actually like it. However, the filter is broken for TV and WesternAnimation, since I can gladly remember shows like

SamuraiPizzaCats, CowAndChicken, IAmWeasel, TheSecretWorldOfAlexMack and so on, but is also perfectly happy watching more recent shows like KimPossible, {{iCarly}}, {{Victorious}}, SonnyWithAChance and so on and so forth. As for video games.. usually the ones around the late 90's and early 2000's have the biggest filter appeal, like DeusEx, HalfLife and so on. Them being some of the best games ever helps. * I had to laugh when I read the nonsense on the main page about filtering everything from your high school days through this "nostalgia filter". Sure, the first couple of years were okay as far as pop culture goes, but the second half was crap, the beginning of the descent into the sea of utter crap that's out there today. Just about the only thing I think favorably of from beginning to end of my high school days is the academics, because I had such an academically rigorous, exciting experience back then. But as far as nostalgia goes? I practically ''live'' in the '70s. I flip through [[http://www.wishbookweb.com/ 1970s department store catalogs online]] and swoon over the women's fashions fo the era. Two of my favorite satellite radio channels are The Strobe (disco) and The Bridge ('70s soft rock/singer/songwriter music). I go onto YouTube to search out '70s commercials, station idents, news reports, promos, movie trailers, and home movies. I've even searched for '70s hairdos to bring with me to the hair salon for the stylist to try to recreate on my own hair. I'm a fan of the 1940s, 1960s, and 1980s too, but the '70s are '''my''' decade. And even though I'm well educated on a lot of the events of the era, from Nixon's normalizing relations with China to Vietnamization to the mass inflation of the Carter administration to the Iranian clerical revolution and ensuing American hostage crisis (though the Shah was no innocent in the revolution), I would '''still''' rather live through the '70s than through the present era. Oh, and I forgot to tell you when I went to high school: 1993 - 1997. That's right, I didn't even live through the '70s. * To me, things like Yoot Tower, some mediocre NES games, and a few Apple IIGS games "get better with age". However, objectively, they aren't that great. I realized this when people talk about Atari games like they were the greatest things on Earth. * Averted with this troper. Mostly because I see everyone else playing it ''so'' damn straight it's not funny. Almost every year, it's this cycle: ** '''January''': Wherein everyone is recovering from Christmas, people get bored and want kids to go back to school. Then school starts, everyone likes the new semester until... ** '''February''': Wherein everyone wishes it were Christmas Break again because it's cold, they're too busy to relax, they don't want to go outside, they have to ''drive'' in that snow and ice, it's Valentines day, everyone hates it because of HypeBacklash, and they just wanna go home and hang out again. ** '''March''': Wherein everyone gets hyped for Spring Break and Saint Patrick's Day, only to spend most of it unconscious or hung over or doing something else than they intended. By Saturday they wish they can go back to school. ** '''April''': Wherein everyone's bored out of their minds and wishes it were Spring Break again, or for summer to get over there ASAP.

** '''May''': Wherein everyone starts counting down the days until summer on their hands and they can finally do stuff and remove that obstacle known as school. They continue to study for finals week and then dash out. Summer begins, and everyone spends the rest of the month unconscious. ** '''June''': Wherein everyone is either still asleep from May or is now complaining at how bored they are because they can't get out of bed. ** '''July''': Wherein everyone is just like the above, but is now complaining about how hot it is outside or how crowded the beaches and water parks are. ** '''August''': Wherein the kids start dreading school, the people who hate summer are looking forward to it, and everyone's still complaining about the heat. School starts, then after a couple weeks, everyone who was looking forward to school are now making plans for Labour Day Weekend because they wish they could relax. ** '''September''': Wherein everyone celebrates Labour Day...then begins to wish it were summer again because it's getting cold out, or it's starting to. ** '''October''': Wherein everyone begins to continue to wish it were summer because it's so damned cold out they have to ''drive'' in that snow, only the bikers who are TooDumbToLive haven't shelved their bikes in the garage. ** '''November''': Wherein everyone begins to look forward to Thanksgiving Week merely because, guess what? They get time off from school. ** '''December''': Wherein everyone begins to make plans for Christmas Break and are finally relieved to be done with school...only to look forward to going ''back'' to school when January rolls around again and then the cycle starts ''all'' over again when people wish it to be several months ago. * You can see ''why'' I tend to actually enjoy summer rather than complain when school starts... * I hate it when Britney Fans do this. Her "Golden" era wasn't completely golden. She had a boyfriend who didn't listen to her, was banned from the radio and had less control of her stage show then she does now and that's just the start of the delusionalism.... * This troper had NEVER had any nostalgia filter for his whole life. He was absolutely convinced it only happened to people older than himself, until he saw it happen to a ten-year-old. This ten-year-old, who was and still is a friend of (gonna ditch this third person thing) mine, had received Tekken 5 for his birthday. Now, Tekken 5 contains the full version of Tekken 3, which I immediately recognized to be graphically identical to the PS1 version. My friend, on the other hand, was convinced that the PS1 version had way better graphics; he kept saying things like "they ruined a game, the original was much better" and so on. I was unable to convince him that the two versions were identical, until I started digging among his old games, found his original Tekken 3 PS1 CD and loaded it with his PS2. Cue JawDrop from my friend. * I put my Nostalgia Filter to the test, when I found cartoons on YouTube. While there are some cartoons that I appreciate more as an

adult, I admit there are some that don't have anything to that effect... for instance, (and YourMileageMayVary) if you take away the [[EarWorm admittedly catchy theme tunes]] to StreetSharks and ExtremeDinosaurs, all you get is a knock-off of [[WesternAnimation/TeenageMutantNinjaTurtles1987 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles]]. * [[{{Tropers/CommandoDude}} This Troper]] has an unshakable apprieciation for cartridge games. Despite being wholly obsolete they last a hullava lot longer then CD/DVD games which inevitably get scratched. Plus, you could always fix a cartridge console just by blowing on it. ** Also, CartoonNetwork was WAAAY better when Toonami was still a weekday bloc that showed anime like DBZ. It all went downhill after they got shunted to a stupid weekend timeslot and now I shudder at the kind of crap they air. * This Troper is fairly certain she'd be shunned if she ever admitted that she hate, hate, hate, hate, HATES Grease. Like, a lot. * After seeing videos like [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8XpY6HEwK3o this one]] and [[http://negativeone.newgrounds.com/news/post/222292 this essay on Newgrounds]], [[{{Tropers/Fungal88}} this tropette]] believes that a [[JustifiedTrope justified]] example of the Nostalgia Filter for a lot of folks in their teens and twenties these days, especially ones who heavily praise the person who made these types of videos, as well as the person who wrote that essay, make her go as far as to think that those people would hope in ''vain'' that they would get hired to babysit today's kids (or when they have kids themselves in the future) so they could show those kids the stuff that those said folks grew up with when they were kids and raise those children very ''firmly'' like a [[SternTeacher strict nanny]] so those children would mature to an extent where they would obtain and maintain the desire of living a more ''classy'' and ''sophisticated'' lifestyle, and have ''tasteful'' interests, especially since she expected a nostalgia-infested babysitter in his or her teens or twenties dragging a [[SpoiledBrat bratty child]] who would prefer to watch ''HannahMontana'' all day out to see ''PrincessAndTheFrog'' when she went to see that movie. * [[http://www.cracked.com/article_15231_7-reasons-21st-centurymaking-you-miserable.html This article]] reads a lot like a "Things were better back in my day" and deliberate AccentuateTheNegative about the 21st century. * [[{{Tropers/Premonition45}} This troper]] hates [[TheyChangedItNowItSucks the alterations]] made to ''[[{{Jeopardy}} Jeopardy!]]'' since 1997. For starters, the change from the amazing [[http://www.oddchange.com/jdoc/pictures/blueset.jpg Grid set]] to the [[http://www.oddchange.com/jdoc/pictures/sushiset.jpg Sushi Bar set]]. Although the Grid set was my favorite, and the single best set the show ever had, the change wouldn't have bothered me too much if it weren't for the fact that it happened ''in the middle'' of the 19961997 season. In the new set's premiere episode, Alex Trebek mentioned the set was made to relate with viewers being in "the warmth, the comfort and the security" of one's own home. Wait, [[CompletelyMissingThePoint Isn't Jeopardy the complete opposite of

safety?]]. Second, replacing the iconic main theme and the legendary "[[JeopardyThinkingMusic Think!]]" theme with [[TheJimmyHartVersion watered down]] versions took away a lot of the program's excitement and energy. And then they moved the various tournaments around. Until 1996, the Tournament of Champions always took place in November, the Teen Tournament always took place in February, and the College Tournament always took place in May). Since the 1997 season, they've moved all around the calendar, being in February, May, September, and then November again! Lastly, for right now, the overabundance of [[IncrediblyLamePun punny]]/"clever" category names. Categories were simple/straightforward, with silly categories happening only occasionally, like celebrity games. Here are the categories from a 1995 game: Bible Quotations; Sports; American Cuisine; Grover Cleveland; Ranks & Titles; "Lady"s. Now, here are categories from more recent years: The Louvre; Earn, Baby, Earn; Jay Leno's Headlines; Dairy Products; Show Me Your Peninsula!; How Well Do You Know "Me"?. Seriously? "Show Me Your Peninsula?"?! That's the kind of stuff I'd get on ''[=~Win Ben Stein's Money~=]'', not Jeopardy! ''itself''! * [[{{Tropers/Shadoboy}} This troper]] may be a kid in adult body, so it's no wonder he can enjoy ''{{Ben 10}}'' as much as he enjoyed DuckTales. ** Seconded, but it also counts as a ''{{Guilty Pleasure}}'' for me. * Not with [[{{Tropers/Ladycoffee}} this troper]], but with the fandom she's in. Highly nostalgic Filipino fans of ''VoltesV'' decried the celebrity re-dub of the said show, having been way '''too''' attached to the Filipino English dub way back in the 70s; never mind that the said dub is actually SoBadItsGood in today's standards; and the actual re-dub is no better or worse that current Filipino dubs. A possible factor for the hatred aside from the nostalgia is that the cast included [[TheScrappy Sandara Park]]. * This troper can't help but burst out laughing everytime he reads about people (mostly on Youtube) binging on about how the 90's were 'so awesome' and how the 2000's (or just about any other decade outside of the 90's and possibly 80's) were/are completly awful. Sure, the 2000's weren't perfect, but no decade is. I like some stuff from the 1990's, but I don't view the 90's as 'the best decade ever'. And for the record, this troper grew up in the 90's, but never received his pair of Nostalgia Goggles... * This troper is one of those die-hard, always pissed off NMA assholes that believe Fallout 2 is the epitome of RPQ quality. I really,really do. Though, this is only about one genre, I'll admit there are a lot of games that might be "more fun" than the old Fallouts, but none of those are RPG's. There are many many that come close, like Knights of the Old Republic, but it just doesn't have the same feel. Now, I don't know if this counts as nostalgia, because I still CONSTANTLY play the oldies, and thus they might as well be brand new games just made 12 years ago. Also Fallout 3 was okay, but it devoured the story. Being around in 1989 as a little child certainly plays a part in my favourite Batman movie (hint: see the

[[http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/no stalgia-critic/7184-batmanvsdk Nostalgia Critic's]] crash-test review). I'm ready to admit, however, that [[TheDarkKnightSaga Nolan's movies]] are brilliant and even improve upon Burton's when it comes to AdaptationDistillation. However, one thing I accept no argument about is the [[BatmanTheAnimatedSeries Batman cartoons]] - everything after 1997 was crap compared to the first seasons. The more recent Batman cartoons are a travesty, and Batman Beyond was good only when it dealt with Bruce Wayne's past friends and enemies! BatmanTheBraveandtheBold is worthy of a smirk and can be fun, but for me the only "proper" current screen version of Batman besides Nolan's franchise is this [[SarcasmMode piss poor]] [[BatmanArkhamAsylum licenced game]]. * [[{{Tropers/AurumFemina}} This troper]], being a new art major, will now more often hear the NostalgiaFilter animation discussions of several classmates. One shining example was one guy who commented on watching a new series on Nicktoons, [[DragonBallKai Dragon Ball Z Kai]], and complained that the storyline was completely stupid compared to that of the original DragonBallZ series. Only thing is, Dragon Ball Z Kai is a recut of the original Dragon Ball Z. ''The story is the same.'' * This troper zigzags this trope. He doesn't really have a problem with the new video games, except for RockBand. But everything else in everything else is okay with him. But he usually plays older games. * [[{{Tropers/PurePurity}} This troper]] has watched Main/{{Nickelodeon}}, Main/{{Cartoon Network}}, and Main/{{Disney Channel}}. I like Main/{{Cartoon Network}} a lot before it changed. A lot of it isn't cartoon and some of the cartoons don't seem to talk about anything of substance or importance. I like Main/{{Spongebob Squarepants}} a lot, but the humor is more gross than it used to be. I dislike a lot of reality tv shows because it glamorizes negative human behavior and promotes negative qualities in human beings. * Provoked on the World of Warcraft forums. This troper preferred classic WoW to whatever it is now, and as such desired classic WoW servers. The next few replies from my OP or others wanting classic WoW back had to do with a) perceived lack of skill, b) "take off that nostalgia filter" or c) "Blizz don't have the money to do it." Nevermind the fact that three pages on the Google listing for "classic WoW" are...wait for it...classic WoW private servers, which enforce this trope. ** This troper disliked Classic WoW because of how ''broken'' the classes were. *** I'll give you this. Playing a paladin as a DPS is more fun now than it was in classic because of Holy Power. No wonder why Rift had to copy it for their warrior. * This troper really tore into someone who said that "Movies today suck, we need to go back to the GoldenAgeOfHollywood". To which I gave him a [[TheReasonYouSuckSpeech "the reason it sucked" speech]]. -> "The GoldenAgeOfHollywood? If anything, it should have been called the ''gilded'' age of Hollywood. Just because you remember stuff like ''WizardOfOz'' and ''CitizenKane'' doesn't mean there wasn't a load of crap. There were ''just'' as many shitty movies back then as there are now -- you just don't remember them because they were quickly ignored.

Theatres back then weren't really concerned with quality -- they were more concerned about getting the movies distributed. Back then, the studios owned the theatres, who had no choice but to run whatever movie they produced, no matter ''how'' shitty it was. Many studios often had localized monopolies on distribution, so they slacked off on quality since the theatres ''had'' to play it anyways, they couldn't just say "WTF, dude, this one sucks! We're not showing it." ''{{Casablanca}}'' wasn't made with the intents of being a classic -it was just Movie #37 or so out of fifty, the only thing that set it apart was that it had an above-average cast. There were ''just'' as many "generic" movies back then as there were now -- studios had their own signature styles. The acting was better? Remember that some of those actors who you think are great now (like KatharineHepburn) were considered "box office poison" back in the day. Also don't forget that many movies you consider the best of all time were actually ''trashed'' by critics back then, the same way a lot of music that is untouchable today was just like JustinBieber.\\ \\ And perhaps the worst part? The studios got away with a ''lot'' of stuff that would nowadays get their asses sued into oblivion if they were lucky. Actors and directors were locked into ironbound contracts that more or less treated them as property. They didn't get to pick what movies they wanted to act in. They had to maintain images in public, and people were given hush money when they saw them acting out of character. You also couldn't be gay (just ask Rock Hudson), and the MoralGuardians could absolutely ''destroy'' a movie, whereas nowadays that causes people to ''[[NoSuchThingAsBadPublicity praise]]'' [[NoSuchThingAsBadPublicity it]] on basis of being declared a Video Nasty. And not to mention, there was a lot of racism in casting -- if you weren't lily-white, you could forget about working in Hollywood unless you wanted to get pigeonholed into [[UncleTomfoolery playing ethnic stereotypes]]. (The story of Rita Hayworth -- aka [[http://www.cracked.com/article_17501_5-celebrity-careers-launchedby-ethnic-makeovers.html Margarita Carmen Cansino]] -- should bear this out.) If you tried many of the stuff that Golden Age Hollywood studios got away with, you'd go under because no actor would work with you and you would probably get sued." * I have this, as I lovingly refer to mid 90s CartoonNetwork as "The Golden Age". I feel the same way about {{Nickelodeon}}. However, I have a few shows from the Golden Age I didn't care for, one of them being RenAndStimpy. I also like a few of nickelodeon and disney's new shows ({{iCarly}}, PhineasAndFerb, and WizardsOfWaverlyPlace, to name a few) * I HATE the way Animal Planet is now, ever since it started making shows about wild animals attacking people, animals being torn to shreads by other animals, cryptids of all things instead shows about baby animals, like it should be because there's never anything on!!! * [[Tropers/TheRedRedKroovy This troper]] has noticed that this very wiki is guilty of this attitude. And not just in TroperTales sections like this one. The MusicIsPolitics page, for example, claims that the corporatization of the music industry began purely with the rise of {{MTV}} and the buyouts of record labels in TheEighties. Ahem. The

first payola scandals? They happened back in TheFifties. The legend that was FrankSinatra? He had an army of actresses hired by his record label to mob him and pretend to be {{squee}}ing fans [[AstroTurf in order to make him look more popular]]. The "image over music" style that so many think is a product of the music video era? Try, a product of TheBeatles and Motown Records. Labels jumping onto trends and driving them into the ground, as if that's a new thing? One word -[[EverythingsFunkierWithDisco disco.]] ** No...the page said it made it ''WORSE''. The article was not written through a NostalgiaFilter. Which is besides the article's point anyway. * This Troper always looks back on his childhood in the nineties and looks back on other possible childhood decades of the 1900's, and can only conclude that his was the best one ever. The early 1900's to the '10s were plagued by World War One, the twenties may have been quite good, what with the economy being stable, and no wars going on, but it was spoiled by the ending, which evolved into the Great Depression of the 30's, followed by World War II, and the threat of Japan and Germany. The fifties looks fine on the outside, but many from that generation will regard it all as very [[CrapsaccharineWorld Crapsaccharine]]. The 60's had the Red Scare, and Vietnam War, which went well into the 70's, and that saw the rise of Disco. The 80's would have been all good, with great music choice, new fun styles, the works, but it still lacked something, like a 90's prototype. The 90's seemingly had it all. The cartoons were all classics, the toys were amazing, bicycles were getting more and more fun to ride, the Super Nintendo, N64, and PSone, all regarded as classic game consoles. There was Surge, Happy Meal toys didn't suck, and Toys 'R Us was the most amazing place on the planet. The only war was the in the Gulf and that was over fairly quickly. You just can't beat the 90's if you were a kid. ** World War 1 wasn't happening in "the early 1900s." Just saying. * LooneyLuver: I hate nostalgia. Sure, I'm only ( going on) 20, but I don't really miss much from childhood. I'm glad they added (500) new pokemon. I've always loved the game. I was afraid I was gonna fall out of it (it was HUGE in third grade) but I'm really happy with BW. Im glad whenever a new FinalFantasy comes out. I think the battles in 13 are awesome. Their so fast but still have the general feel of the 'old' ATB system. I dunno. About the only reason I miss childhood is because, as I near adulthood, it's scary. What if I don't make enough money to live comfortably? What if I never meet the man who'll aid me in coming out to my parents? *sigh* life is just hard. * My first pokemon game was Emerald. One day, a few months ago, I found a Pokemon Blue cartridge. I played it. It sucked. * [[ThisIsATest This Troper]] and his brother recently got into an argument that exemplifies this trope. The argument was over which was better, ''MightyMorphinPowerRangers'' or ''PowerRangersWildForce''. This troper was born in '92, so he was pretty much born into the original PowerRangers franchise. His brother, born '97, was about five years old when Wild Force came out, and thus, thought it was the shit. It took a neutral third party (born circa '87) to inform them that both series were equally bad.

* This troper is (almost) 18 and, yet, I insist that music was far better when I was young(er) and far beyond that (much of the music I listen to is from the 70-80's). True, the style hasn't changed much, but, come on, does the music industry even care about rock music anymore? I've been forced to listen to Radio 1 for roughly a quarter of an hour every school morning for almost a year (we were given our own bus, (despite the fact that the previous bus service worked perfectly fine) and, in that time, I can only recall about three rock songs having been played (and one of them was pop punk, which doesn't exactly help the argument). I know that pop music makes more money for the industry due to being quicker to produce, but that doesn't mean the charts need to be full of symthesisers consistantly: it makes the average rock artist have to work even harder than Lady GaGa just to have a chance of even entering the top 100 charts. I've actually considered boycotting the charts because the average pop song could, realistically, be written, produced, recorded and ready for release in a few hours, but the average requires many different takes, so requires more work and [[ThisIsSparta This. Deserves.]] [[PrecisionFStrike Fucking.]] [[ThisIsSparta Acknowledgement!]] *cough* [[RantInducedSlight Sorry about that, but it's been bugging me for far longer than I care to admit.]] ** God, I've just looked back on this and I think I sounded like [[{{Understatement}} a bit of a dickhead]]. In the interest of balance (as well as having read the comment four down), I'll confess I listen to some Lady Gaga (most tracks like "Judas" and "Bad Romance"), Simon & Garfunkel (who can be considered folk-pop at a pinch), Johnny Cash (who I listen to when not listening to rock, punk and metal), Cat Stevens (folk-rock), Queen (who basically sang in any style except country and rap, although my favourite song of theirs is possibly "Somebody To Love") and a lot of folk music (a very underrated genre when you actually look at it). Indeed, if pop music didn't sound so blatently dancey (a bit of an irritation considering I don't like disco dancing) and generally samey (beat in the background, as my dad likes to put it), I'd probably listen to a hell of a lot more of it (and, even then, I might tread carefully for fear of Autotune). Having said this, I will still not touch a rap CD unless it is matter of life and death, as I honestly can't stand it after having tried to last through a whole BeastieBoys album. Honestly, music isn't as great as it was, but I'm not going to argue about when it died: if I like it, I'll listen to it and to hell with whether it matches up with your view on good music or not. Besides, music is expressive, so find something that suits you and stop taking the piss out of it just because you don't like the genre someone else does, as this gets up my nose more than people who claim that the only good genre is (insert genre here). Mini rant finished...[[OrIsIt for now.]] * This troper can't STAND people who are like this, and I would always have to tell them that there was as much crap in their own time as there are now in entertainment and personally, I believe that if the internet was founded earlier, people would be complaining about shows like "Ren and Stimpy" and Rugrats" as well. * For some reason, this troper seems to have a liking for older windows screensavers.

* I'm astounded that I actually thought the third season of ''SailorMoon'' was the most epic story every told. (I apparently forgot every single filler episode in the process.) * This trope is probably the only reason why CardCaptorSakura will remain one of my favorite anime of all time, no matter WHAT anyone says, and Pokemon's first two seasons are the only good ones. ** Seconded with the Pokemon. The series just stopped trying to be more than MerchandiseDriven after a while, and there were too many episodes to keep track of at that point anyway. Anyway, I fondly remember ''all'' ''CardCaptorSakura'' in all formats. * For my own, I have to play with this crazily. The 90s were too dramatic when looked at from hindsight, and so were the 2000s to an extent. But here's my take: First, in hindsight animation (from any era, not just the early 2000s) sucked for different reasons. Either the special effects (which I thought back then were awesome) were bland or the plot was too basic. For me video games between 1995 and 2006 is the target for my version. Sure, many newer video games were better (FFXIII actually had better combat than anything before) but it had Unreal Tournament which was awesome (3 was just as good if not better) and of course GTA. Bonus compared to now: Once you get a game, you get the complete game, no upselling for DLC or anything similar, just a $50 game. Of course, video game consoles manufactured then started failing... ** My musical tastes are in the early 2000s to present, with some exceptions, averting this trope. If you want to tone down a nostalgia filter, turn on the rap or pop station. ** And I found out that once we complain about something in one era, our attention has shifted elsewhere. The 50s, 60s, and into the 70s were racism and nuclear war; the 80s were debt; the 90s, crime; the 2000s, terrorism; and increasingly into today, the environment. * My bet is that when TroperTales gets a new format, there'll be a slight NostalgiaFilter for this format as well, with people screaming "NetworkDecay" bloody murder. * This troper tries to avoid this, mainly since I know my grandchildren will ask me what the 2000's were like; I really don't want to dissapoint them by saying "I have no idea. I was too focused on older media to pay attention to the present." ** That's kind of sad, yet kind of awesome at the same time. I wish I were more focused on older media as well. * This troper and his class had a talk about the present time in general. It turned out that almost everybody missed the 80's because, at the time, there was so much more respect, and so much less violence. At one time, I interrupted them and said :"Well, I've just one thing to say : Nostalgia filter ! What 80's do you liked ? The one were we could be wiped out by nuclear war or the one were the givernement lied to us about tchernobyl ? My favorite is the one where we weared horrible fashioned suit, and tried to find some peace in my school between the two gang in my school. Unemployement hitted hard, and there was no racism at the time, because racism was the standard procedure in society. Oh, and yeah, abortion was still a crime in those wonderful day." Awkward silence ensued...and I loved every

second of it. * Here's an easy way to test this trope: 1. Go on Youtube 2. Look up a video for any Disney movie made before 2000. 3. Look at the highest rated comments; 9 out of 10 times they'll be comments like "New Disney sucks! Woe is me, I miss old Disney". You get no argument from me about the Disney Channel and the live-action movies nowadays (at least for now), but have these people not seen ''ThePrincessAndTheFrog'' or ''{{Tangled}}'' yet? ** Now that you mention it, that might be an extremely justified example of this trope coming from people in my age group, especially after coming across some complaints about WaltDisney "spinning around in his grave," especially since those same people were [[AndTheFandomRejoiced easily elated]] at the announcement of those movies. Therefore, I might be taking a wild guess that children that will boom into this world over the next several years will be forcefully raised on the stuff their parents grew up with now that I've aged into the predominant childbearing range. *** Well, those two movies were just as good as the movies from the 90's, so I don't think fans were easily elated over nothing. Bottom line, even after Disney is improving after the 2000's slump, the FanDumb is still going to complain that Disney is dead and their childhoods are RuinedForever. ** That's not just true about Disney. That's true about EVERYTHING. * [[{{Revelo}} This Troper]] views the period from the late 80's to early 2000's with the NostalgiaFilter. My reasons for this are down to the belief that humanity entered a renaissance of sorts where everything suddenly started moving on in laps and bounds in quality while technology suddenly started showing us what it was really capable of. Animation gave us shows like Batman, Pixar became known to the world with ToyStory, Nirvana gave us Nevermind, games consoles finally got over the crash of 83 with games like TombRaider, CrashBandicoot and VideoGame/SuperMario64, the internet started filtering it's way into daily life, we got sports stars like Michael Jordan or Michael Schumacher. I'd argue this was the last carefree generation before 9/11 came and changed the dyanmic of the world. ** Wow, this might be a logical reasons why there has been a huge swarm of nostalgic complaints across the Internet from people as young as their teens and twenties over the past few years. In other words, living a happy carefree childhood in the 90s has obviously preceded a supposedly traumazing adolescence and early adulthood in the 2000s to the point where it made them feel at least as nostalgic as a crochety old geezer (no offense). * This troper found herself watching the rest of an anime that she loved when she started it on tape years ago (''ThoseWhoHuntElves'') online recently. [[SoOkayItsAverage It just wasn't that good]], or maybe watching anime online just isn't my thing? * Hockey legend Ken Dryden (of all people) had an excellent quote "The Golden Age was always when you were a kid." The more time I spend on the internet, the more I realize just how true that is. People who were kids during the 1930s think that was the Golden Age for everything: movies, music, sports, etc..., those who were kids in the 1950s feel that way about their time. I see it that way about people

who were kids in the 1990s like me. * This troper feels this way about KingsQuestMaskOfEternity. She knows that it was a disgrace to the rest of the series, but can't really bring herself to hate it because it was such an large part of her childhood. * Sort of played with for [[Tropers/{{ptitletlypxope}} this troper]]. I grew up in TheNineties (I was born in 1990, after all) but missed most of the stuff that other people of my generation seem to look back on fondly (I almost never watched ''{{Pokemon}}'', ''{{Power Rangers}}'', ''{{Rugrats}}'', ''{{Animaniacs}}'', any of the DisneyAfternoon shows, etc.). About the only things I frequently find people on the internet reminisce about that I regularly watched as a kid are ''{{Powerpuff Girls}}'', ''{{Dexters Laboratory}}'', and ''{{Sailor Moon}}''. I recently re-watched some ''Dexter's Lab'' episodes I found on the internet (at cartoonlair.com) and found them to be not quite as good as remembered, but still good. Haven't checked yet with ''Powerpuff Girls'' or ''Sailor Moon''. I'm also nostalgic about ''{{Reboot}}'', but nobody seems to talk about that one anymore. ---Go back to NostalgiaFilter, which was way better back in my day! ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NoSuchThingAsBadPublicity * This troper's friend has a cartoon series, one episode of which was posted on Encyclopedia Dramatica, on a page where it was trolled. Thanks to this incident, the video now has 10 times the hits it had before, and only ONE negative comment. * Call me a Joseph Mengele if you will, but one thing I would love to see is an experiment done with peoples' minds. For example, release a movie...and then "cut" a couple scenes from the movie and "{{Bowlderize}}" it before release. Get word out on the internet that it was censored and Bowlderized...then when the DVD/Blu-Ray comes out, label it as "uncut" with the "Bowlderizations" removed and the "cut" scenes restored...except that the "Bowlderization" was merely making a character who doesn't swear normally cuss like a sailor (Even when it makes absolutely no sense for them to be screaming PrecisionFStrike after PrecisionFStrike), incredibly minor details that don't contribute to the story, etc. And the cut scenes? Storylinewise they're all [[BigLippedAlligatorMoment Big Lipped Alligator moments]] that don't contribute a thing to the story or are redundant scenes that establish something an earlier scene already did...etc. My hypothesis is that the "uncut" release would be considered the superior version on basis of being Uncut or whether or not the plot is enhanced by the "Removal" of the "Bowlderizations" and "addition" of the "cut" scenes. * My parrot is constantly doing things she'll be reprimanded for just to get attention.

NotActuallyTheUltimateQuestion

* A favourite joke of this troper's father is to ask people what they think about when they look up at the stars at night. After the predictable long-winded reply usually including how small in comparison the person feels to the rest of the universe, this troper's father pauses, looks confused, then asks "Don't you wonder what happened to your roof?" * [[DarkInsanity13 This troper]] has a button/pin that says "why am I here?" It's up for interpretation to whoever sees it as to whether or not it's a philisophical question or just as a joke. Most people must take it as a joke, as only one woman (a stranger, at that) has ever given her the expected long-winded answer about God and such. ** You should have replied with what [[RedVsBlue Simmons said after Grif's long thing about god]] in Episode 1 of RedVsBlue. * [[NeoSilverThorn This Troper]]'s dad used this trope to make the point that The Ultimate Question changes from moment to moment, and then asked the other members of the book club what they thought the Ultimate Question was right then. His dad's old college friend mulled it over, then asked why the hell we kept buying our IPA by the pint instead of just ordering a pitcher. * [[@/GamerAmI This troper]] manages to [[SubvertedTrope subvert]] this trope in quite a few conversations with his friends. They'll ask him a mundane question, he'll give them a philosophical answer, and rather than say "I actually meant...", they'll become genuinely interested in the deeper philosophical points of their question. Hell, many of his friends now ask those questions and [[InvertedTrope are disappointed when he responds with a mundane answer.]] * This troper was taking a class in moral theory, and the lecturer was going on about the gradual extension of humanity's moral perception. The person next to the troper was flipping through her book and whispered, "Hey, where are we?" The troper attempted to sum up in thirty seconds the complete development of humankind, arriving at "so most of us think all humans deserve moral consideration, but some of us don't and some of us think it goes beyond that." "Yeah, but where are we in the text?" * I love answering the most mundane of questions with the most unnecessarily philosophical of answers, simply to annoy people. That, and answering "What's up?" with "The sky." ** For "what's up?" I like "Perpendicular to and moving away from the center of the earth." * I'm told that when my sister was 4 years old (I'm younger, just heard the story), my grandfather was driving with her in the car and she asked "Grandpa? What's def?" My grandfather started to explain death in the best terms you could for a 4 year old when she interrupted, pointing at the dashboard - she meant "DEF" for "Defroster" ---What is the point of [[NotActuallyTheUltimateQuestion this trope]]? ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NotAMorningPerson * On a school trip at about 4AM, this exchange occurred: ** Friend:(jokingly) Mornin' sunshine! ** Troper: Oh, fuck your face. * This is [[Tropers/DaNuke Da_Nuke]]. Two days before writing this, he overslept at 8:00 AM. He ''always'' oversleeps through team work gatherings. On weekends he usually gets up at 12:00 PM. It's still a miracle why he hasn't crashed his car while driving to college in the morning. Waking up at 6:00 AM even one single day a week is seriously bad for his physical and mental health; when that happens, [[MustHaveCaffeine he resorts to half a liter of coffee]] after waking up. And on top of that, he's a HeavySleeper... * This troper is so groggy in the morning, it actually takes about 40 minutes for him to fully retain his senses. If I eat before then, it's like putting texture in my mouth. And forget about focusing on objects. ** This troper is like this as well, with the added affect that I have a tendancy to start swinging at whoever woke me up before I'm fully aware of my surroundings. I once punched a classmate in the face on a school trip for this very reason. * This Troper's sister is like that. One day I decided to greet her with a cheerful "Good morning! Isn't life WONDERFUL?" and she threw a book at me. It was totally worth it. ** I hope [[{{Jerkass}} you]] get [[{{CruelAndUnusualDeath}} eaten alive by millions of tiny sharks dressed like clowns]]. * This troper is a Hikikomori who wakes up really fast, just not really early. Nobody must talk to me until I'm up and had some kind of food or drink. On days when she's left alone she can wake up at 2 in the afternoon. my best friend NEEDS her sleep though, as sleep-talking and poor cowering class-mates on school trips can tell you. * [[{{Tropers/This-guy}} I'm]] like this on days I think I have school, but an aversion on the weekends. I wake up at 2:00 or 3:00 AM to use the computer. * My rule is simple: if it's not 12PM yet, then I don't wake up. That means I won't answer any phones, answer any doors, fill in for someone at work, whatever. I ''detest'' mornings and I rarely make an exception. Unfortunately I'm doomed with a family who '''ARE''' morning people and they are LOUD. ** [[Tropers/{{popelmaster}} This Troper]] is like that too. Which is kind of a problem when school usually ''ends'' at 1PM. * Tropers/JapaneseTeeth: On a ''good'' day, morning doesn't start until 11. Wake me up before that and I will appear conscious, but will be totally oblivious to everything. * Morning starts at 16:00. ** Why are you [[Tropers/{{G-Mon}} me]]? * During military training, and service, this troper developed something of a 'robot routine' I guess... Whatever you call it, I'm only vaguely aware of what I do for the first 40 - 60 minutes of being awake - I shower, change, eat, drink all without really noticing it. I once came to the sudden realization that I was lacing my boots up, with half eaten toast on my lap. * [[Tropers/{{Midna}} I]] usually sleep to around 7 or 8... on

weekends. On school days I sleep to 6 at the latest - not because school is far away, but because school starts at ''7:30''. (Yes, I do want to punch the superintendent, thank you for asking.) Obviously, school mornings are never my A-game. * [[Tropers/{{Kaizykat}} This Troper]] needs at least nine to ten hours of sleep to function normally. It was to the point where she would wake up at 6 go to school and ''sleep through her morning classes'' if she didn't get a caffeine or sugar fix. Now the caffeine does nothing and she just resorts to eating sugar. * [[Tropers/NotSoBadassLongcoat This troper]] rarely gets up before 10AM if he doesn't have to. Before that, he's on a more or less conscious "autopilot" (see "robot routine" above). * [[Tropers/{{Gerusz}} This troper]] keeps a good supply of energy drinks in his fridge for this very reason: making a coffee on a gas stove takes 15 minutes. He rather sleeps for that 15 minute too, if possible. He also has DSPS (Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome), thus he naturally sleeps from 4 AM to 12 PM. He can only adhere to this cycle on weekends or in holidays. Normal daily routine may get him in sleep at 1-2 AM, but not earlier. Sleeping for 5-6 hours is not healthy and definitely doesn't help him being a morning person. Also, sarcasm circuits calibrate themselves slower when he's not fully awake. It means that if you're not [[{{House}} trying to find some ideas for a show featuring a specific doctor]] [[DrJerk who is a massive dick]], you might just avoid him. ** [[Tropers/AcrossTheStars This troper]] would like to kiss you for just explaining my recurring sleep issues. Passionately. You may have seriously changed my life. ''Thank you.'' *** [[Tropers/{{Timber}} This troper]] is seconding this. ''Thank you!'' *** [[Tropers/HikartiFlutist This Troper]] would ALSO like to snog you passionately for this. Times a little different (3AM-11AM), but same thing. Days I had to be up early (4. Fucking. AM) I just went without sleep entirely, running on coffee, which I don't even ''like''. Crashed when we got to the hotel at midnight, though. Only time I fell asleep before 3AM in a long time. ''Thank you'', good sir, for your assistance. *** [[Tropers/{{Seanette}} Another troper]] suspects her husband of having DSPS. The Wikipedia description fits him quite well, as he confirmed when he read the article. He also commented that finding out about this syndrome explained a ''lot'' for him. He's currently quite happy to be working swing shift (2pm to 10:30pm). * If This Troper is even partially conscious before nine o'clock and wasn't woken up by something else, than it's a guaranteed sign that I am sick (I know, it's weird). * This Troper quit her job because it required her to get up at 4am. * Tropers/{{Ripsaw}} is ''not'' a morning person, yet has a job with flexible hours where he (volunarily!) gets up at 0500. I generally don't "wake up" until about 0615...by which time he is halfway to work. On ''bad'' days, I don't wake up until I hit the parking lot at 0630, or even a little later. * Whenever it's not a school day or any day where I have to wake up early in the morning, I tend to wake up at around 11 A.M. or later.

The latest I slept in was around 3 P.M. This troper would of joined her middle school's jazz band if it wasn't for the fact that I would have to get to practice at 7 in the morning. It was bad enough for me at 7:45. I hate mornings so much... * [[Tropers/GwenStacyWannabe Me]], so very much. To the point that my brother tried to wake me up once and my default reaction was to open my eyes and smack him in the face. * This troper. Definitely not a morning person, but has to wake up in 5.30 AM because the university is rather far from home. Life sucks. Except during weekends and vacations. * Do not wake up this Troper earlier than 9 in the morning if you value your life or use of limbs. It doesn't help that he's a frequent insomniac. If a fire woke this troper up, he'd probably try to fistfight the fire. * [[Tropers/{{Xaris}} This troper]] already has a short temper when alert, but in the morning, he is so damn irritable that he will not speak with anyone and will retreat back into his room after retrieving breakfast to keep himself from getting angry at someone just for talking to him. * For [[Tropers/{{Raikage}} this troper]], mornings don't start until 12:00 PM. If I wake up before then, not only am I completely grumpy, irritable and still tired, I also can't eat. If I try to eat, I get sick. And not eating makes me even grumpier. Plus, I can barely move in the morning without stumbling into a wall or something. I'm allergic to mornings, I swear. * [[Tropers/RocketScience This troper]] absolutely detests getting out of bed for ''anything''. If you value your life, [[ThisIsSPARTA don't. Wake. Me. Up.]] * [[Tropers/DarkInsanity13 This troper]] has never (seriously, ''never'') been a morning person. When her mom was putting her baby brother down for his noon nap, this troper (about 2 or 3) was just waking up. Years of habitual waking up at 8am for school has whittled down the habit for the most part, but she's still prone to sleeping to 11am or later when left alone. But most weekends (when her parents are home), she has comprimised with her father (who threatens with extreme bouts of immense bothering) that she is to be left alone until 10:30am unless one has a good reason. * This troper (whose non-24-hour sleep cycle and nocturnal tendencies ''do not help'') takes at least an hour to properly wake up except on very rare occasions, regardless of ''when'' she gets up, and prefers to spend as much of that time as possible laptopping in bed. And she shambles like a zombie if she has to actually get ''out'' of bed (sometimes [[ZombieGait literally]], to be funny). * Yesterday [[Tropers/PhoenixFire I]] slept until 6:30. '''PM'''. * This is [[TrumpetMarietta me]], or, at least, it used to be. I can't sleep much later than 11:00 any more, however, although I am rarely asleep before 02:00. End results: [[MustHaveCaffeine coffee]], [[MustHaveCaffeine Mountain Dew]], and chronic sleep deprivation. Also, I am not pleasant to speak with before 10:00. Of course, [[TemptingFate it could be worse]]: at least I'm no longer suffering from severe chronic insomnia. * [[Tropers/KennyMan666 This troper]] adores his current university

schedule, because it means he never has to wake up before 10:00. On Thursdays the lecture doesn't start until until 16:00, and Fridays have absolutely no scheduled lectures whatsoever. For the whole semester. Generally, he usually tells people that they shouldn't count on him being coherent before 12:00. * This troper, thanks to chronic insomnia and an unusual circadian rhythm, is only a morning person when they've stayed up all night and haven't slept. (the number of people who think I've gotten a good nights sleep when I've been up since yesterday is ''astonishing'') It was so bad that unless it was to tell me the news, my family preemptively refused to talk to me in the morning. And this troper was likened to a woken hibernating bear growing up, until they were allowed to stick to their own preferred sleep schedule after graduating. They're better now, at least, they don't speak in snarls and growls anymore. * this troper. iv had to warn all my friends to not even try to talk to me before 3rd period * Me, totally. my mum knows me so well that when we went to a Doctor Who book signing, she ended up telling the writers that I'd scare Daleks before coffee. * The world does not exist before 8:00, in [[Tropers/MisterAlways this troper's]] opinion. On weekends? 13:00. * This troper. Even her dogs know that they're taking their lives into their own hands should they bark after she has gone to bed. * Very much this troper. 12 or 1 PM is the best time to wake up, but the rest of my dorm thinks that 9AM is a good time to be talking right outside my door. Cue an extremely pissed troper. * Every morning I wake up at Six o' clock for school, but I'm not awake until at least 7:30 or 8:00. Also, if you get me up before 5:00, I'll probably react violently. At my cousin's sleepover, the youngest was annoying me. At 1:00 AM. I was just short of beating her up, but I was good with growling [[ThisIsSparta "Go. Away. Now."]]. * Do not talk to this troper before ten A.M. I try to make exceptions for people I particularly like, but heavy conversation is not advised. People are surprised at how different I become in the later parts of the morning. Zombie shambling and mumbles occur frequently, unless the mumbles are replaced with a biting comment. * Wake this troper up before 9 a.m. for ANY reason other than emergency, and he will end your shit. * My name is {{Ryumaru}}, and I hate hate HATE getting up in the mornings. School's [[strike: brainwashed]] trained me to actually get up around 6:30, but wake me up before 6 a.m. and may God have mercy on your soul. I will unleash the fury of [[http://media.photobucket.com/image/endcat/Bigmageta/Endcat.jpg Endcat,]] but in human form. * Anyone who tries to wake [[{{Ozbourne}} this troper]] even one minute earlier than necessary will probably be greeted with cursing, and may have a stuffed animal/remote control/whatever else is within reach thrown at their head. * due to Delayed sleep-phase syndrome, waking this troper up before noon will get you viciously maimed. when i do have to go to school even the teachers do not bother me.

* Inverted by [[{{MiraShio}} me]], because my biological clock and I never seem to be able to cooperate. I used to only like waking up early when there are no classes (because then can I enjoy the morning more), but now no matter how late I sleep, I always seem to wake up between 4:00 AM and 5:30 AM. ** Holy crap, you are a less extreme version of me(when I'm awake enough to check the time, it tends to be around 3-4). * One morning, this troper's uncle's alarm clock went off, so he smacked it to shut it off. He missed the button. He smacked it again, and missed again. He kept hitting it until it stopped going off. Twenty minutes later, this troper's grandmother walked into her son's room and saw Jim asleep, with the smashed remains of the alarm clock on the nightstand. * [[TheGreatMatt This troper's]] dad loves making fun of my mornings. Sometimes, though, he's concerned that I don't reply to "Good morning"'s. * I occasionally subscribe to this behaviour. My sleep cycles or nowhere near sane though (from sleeping a lot every two days, to sleeping a bit every four hours, and currently sleeping around 16 hours daily), so morning for me is simply the first two or three hours after waking up. That's how long I take to fully wake up, and there's always the possibility of falling asleep again without memory of having been awake. During those hours I'm not terribly logical, and prone to saying very mean truths to get people to leave me the fuck alone while I recalibrate. * [[{{Gerusz}} This troper]]: Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome. Plus caffeine addiction caused by the syndrome. It's pretty hard to reach runlevel5 after 3-4 hours of sleep... 150-200 mg of coffee is enough for him to start his morning routine. Usually. * [[{{Agent Alpha}} This troper]] has a father who's a morning person and a mother who's definitely not. He's a little bit of both, so he thinks of himself as a "slow morning person." Also, a good cup of hot tea (or two) is usually required at the start of any day. * Even when this troper wasn't sick (the day now starts at 5PM and she can sleep for twenty hours straight but still need more), if you woke her up before 12PM then you could have been classified as a DeathSeeker. * This troper does not like mornings AT ALL. As in, before noon. With no reason to get up early, he will not. However, if guaranteed quiet, he will set an alarm to wake up early for the sole reason of grabbing a drink, relieving himself, and going back to sleep for another few hours while basking in the glow of not having to get up. * Don't even bother calling this troper before 11 AM. He simply DOES NOT WORK before that. Even if he sleeps 12 hours a day, he WILL not work well in the morning. * This troper. Forever. Apparently I look like a dinosaur in the mornings, I'm so grumpy. * [[IronScope I'm]] reasonably certain that I'm nocturnal. It's a pretty rare thing for me to be asleep before midnight, and I've woken up at four in the afternoon on at least one occasion. ** This is [[FeralPhoenix my]] natural sleep pattern, too, though stuff like college doesn't like to let me stick to it.

* This troper tends to imitate an irritated [[StarWars Wookiee]] or [[HulkSpeak cavewoman]] when forcibly awakened prior to about, oh, eight or so. Either "braagh, why for [[GoddamnedBats goddamn birds]] got wake me Skuk up?", "mrnnrwaaghCAFFEINE", or something else along those lines. HilarityEnsues for anyone who's not me. * This troper always had trouble waking up early. It took several years to find out a viable method: first, his wristwatch rings. Then, his radio turns on. And he keeps the clothes he'll wear next to his bed, on the computer's chair, so he changes while still in bed and gets up ready... * [[{{Alexduckie}} I]]'m not awake until at least 1 PM. Try to wake me up, I dare you. And if I do wake up, like I have to on school days, I'm on complete autopilot for the next several hours. * [[{{RaeMina}} Averted.]] =D ** [[{{Tropers/Joerc45}} I]] must ask, how do you do it? ^_^ * Some of the tropers on this list seem like morning persons anyway. Just because they flipped the days THAT much. That said, this troper loooooooves morning. He just loves nights even more. * Sometimes, if I wake up and still tired, I can be grouchy and possibly overract or even yell on occassion to a family member for something dumb. * The only reason why {{Jedielf}} wakes up any earlier than say, 10am, is for work or school. * Subverted hard by this troper. I get up every day at 6:00, no matter when I went to bed, and I never drink coffee. So, I should shut up and get out of here, right? Well, the flip side is that I'm always tired by 22:00, and the world is not built for me. No late-night parties, no bars, no clubs, no dancing. Seriously, someone should open a 9 AM-4 PM club with bright lights and happy music just for us morning people. ** Hello, me. I always had trouble when I slept over with my cousins, because they would be up for ages and I would be like, "mmkay, it's 10:30, sleep time is now" and have to put up with them bothering me until I shut myself in another room/[[HeavySleeper fell asleep.]] Although if I have something engaging, like a roleplay or something of that nature, I can stay up surprisingly late(for me). * [[{{Tropers/Joerc45}} This troper]] has slept until 6:00 PM on many occasions, and when I have to wake up before 12:00 PM it's a very daunting task. The only thing that allows this troper to deal with early morning adventures [[MustHaveCaffeine is a nice hot cup of coffee.]] Please leave me alone until I have had it, thank you very much ^_^ * This Troper's brother was forced to play the trombone in grade seven and eight and because he wasn't very good he had to bring it home on the weekends to practice. Now, said little brother is an adorkable sweetie-pie and would never be so cruel as to wake me up with that monstrous noise...our sister on the other hand...not so nice. Ten minutes after I chase her out of my room and up the stairs filled with me trying to fall back asleep I finally climb said stairs myself. The little moron is standing completely normally, talking with our Mom about how 'awesome' that idea was so I grab her arm, twist it behind her back and pin her to the kitchen door. Whispering, in the most deadly tone I can muster at one o'clock in the afternoon, that if she

ever tries that again I would burn her Twilight books and flush all her most prized items down the toilet or just plain throw them away. I also might have thrown in something about me cutting off all her hair in her sleep, the details are a little fuzzy. But the point is that she hasn't done it since. >=) * Inverted by this troper: around nine or ten at night, I lose the ability to form a coherent sentence, and get [[BerserkButton unhappy]] when people make noise after I've gone to bed. (This probably has something to do with my tendency to wake up when it gets light out, whether I want to or not--whether I've ''had enough sleep'' or not, actually.) * This troper is this. My father is not. My father drives me to school every morning. Needless to say, my first couple of periods are...unpleasant for anyone who tries to get me in conversation. When my dad once, out of spite, tried to talk too much and bother me on the way to school, it was thee days before my friend gathered the courage to ask me what was up with me that morning. * This troper wakes up every weekday morning at 6am for school. His reaction time hovers around a few seconds, until he gets in the car with his dad at 6.30 am, then he goes back to sleep. He usually isn't considered awake by classmates until halfway through the first class. He does, however wake up immediately if something presses his BerserkButton and/or get in a fight with him. * This troper is this on school days. When his mother wakes him up, he is like a zombie, slowly dragging himself through the usual morning procedure, and then hopping right back into bed for about another twelve minutes. Once he is officialy half up, he is a little irritable (though he usually doesn't show it), and don't get him started on morning classes, especially the ones he doesn't like. * This troper ''was'' this on school days -- now he's adult he happily maintains a schedule of sleep from roughly 4am to noon. The funny thing is that my friend Jonathan works in a hotel and has to get up at 4am; when we meet up, which is usually for a whole day, by around 8pm we're both pretty tired but for opposite reasons. * [[Tropers/{{Zadia}} Zadia]] is this. I always wake up at around 7ish, but I absolutely hate having to get up, especially because I rarely wake up as early as I want to (i.e. at least half an hour before I have to get up) and for some reason in the mornings, every time I look at a clock it's a minute later. I hate clocks. * This Troper's friend, A, has two main phases of sleep: Fully awake, and dead asleep. Once he was deep in the latter when his mom directed a friend of his, B, to wake him up. It took several minutes to get any sort of response - which happened to occur in the form of a thrown clock-radio to B's head. Yes, it had been plugged in at the time. Yes, it was left with a sizeable dent in it. No, Friend A was still asleep, but Friend B decided to let him be. * This troper's classmates all have an unfortunate tendency to stay up late and regret it in the morning. One day Freshman year, there was a class sleepover at the school... on the night of a school day. This troper was the only one GenreSavvy enough not to attend, and got a full 8 hour's sleep. Everyone else stayed up until 2 am. This troper's friendly greetings the next morning were [[{{Understatement}} not very

well received.]] * [[Tropers/{{Timber}} This troper]] admits that her tendency to stay up until 3 or 4 AM does not help this, but even when she's in bed by midnight, it's extremely rare to see her out of bed before noon (unless she has to be somewhere before then, in which case expect to see her vertical, but nothing that you'd accurately be able to call awake). She's climbed out of bed at 4 PM before... And still been sleepy. * This Troper cannot fall asleep before 11:00 PM, even after a summer of having to get up at 6:00 AM for work 5 days a week. Cue MustHaveCaffeine after lunch. * [[Tropers/{{Seraph}} This troper]] has turned off the alarm clock while sleeping more than once, and tends to be on auto-pilot the first hour after [[strike:waking up]] getting out of bed. Some mornings, I find myself at my desk at work and wondering how the hell I got there, because I don't remember the trip at all. [[http://www.pearlgates.net/dreams/20100127.shtml And sometimes, I * think* I have woken up, but...]] * This is the only reason why this troper can't do ANYTHING right after she wakes up. She can't eat, talk, see or even walk properly. * Waking up is no problem for this troper. Just don't expect me to understand anything said to me before 10 AM or [[{{Must Have Caffeine}} a gallon of coffee]]. * this troper zig-zags this; sometimes she wakes up a few hours earlier than she needs to and fail to fall asleep again (she usually gives up after two hours), sometimes she'll get out of bed groggy but wake up fully after walking from her room to the stairs, and sometimes it will take her ''over an hour'' to wake up (hence why she usually gets up at five when she doesn't start getting ready for school until six) * Both subverted and invoked with this troper. If he sets his alarm (generally if he has to be up before 9AM), he can easily be out of bed and ready to do something by 8AM (and usually have had breakfast at 7:30AM). If he doesn't (generally at the weekend), expect him not to make an appearance until about 10 or 11AM. Justified in the latter case: I tend to put on a CD and listen to it until it finishes before getting out of bed. * The odd thing about this troper is that he is fine and dandy with being woken up in the morning. But try to wake me up from a nap and I'll kick or toss and turn at random. ... Or throw a pillow. My mother told me a quote just now that roughly translates, "Go ahead and joke with someone drunk, but never someone who just woke up." * [[Tropers/{{Lunar Delta}} This troper]] has delayed sleep phase syndrome, and his natural, ideal sleep schedule runs from about 2AM to 11AM. Staying up until the early morning and sleeping until 3PM or later is not uncommon. If he gets this amount of sleep, he feels great. If not, he feels lousy all day long. He is very sluggish and disoriented after waking up, and takes at least one hour and a 20oz Mountain Dew to reach full consciousness. He also has difficulty falling asleep and is therefore very protective of his asleep state once it is reached. He does not care if you are the biggest, fattest, meanest brawler in the world. He does not care if you are f*cking

Bruce Lee on PCP. If you wake him up even one Planck moment before he has reached his ideal amount of sleep, he. will. END YOU. * My best friend has delayed sleep phase syndrome, and sleeps from about 7am to 4pm. Im just naturally a night person, and cant go to bed earlier than 1am, and usually look and feel like a zombie in the morning. In the holidays I can stay up til 3, adapting my sleep schedule to stay up late and chat to my friend, as I love it when we stay up late chatting to eachother on facebook chat. * Despite often having to be ''conscious'' at 7 am, [[Tropers/HiWayXingFrog this Troper]] is rarely ''awake'' before 12 ''pm''. * This troper. 'Nuff said. * This troper never really got the hang of the whole getting up in the morning, going to bed in the evening and not the other way around thing. Also, [[MustHaveCaffeine coffee]] [[ImmuneToDrugs doesn't seem to work on her.]] * My mother thinks sleeping past 9AM is sinful. I think of it as sensible. I only get to sleep before 1AM if I am sick or have pulled an all-nighter, even if I go to bed earlier. My professors all know that if a class is before 10:30AM, coherence is optional. As is tact. * It takes [[@/{{billybobfred}} me]] the entire day to wake up. Yes, the whole thing. No, that's not an exaggeration... well, maybe a little bit. * This Troper's Morning Routine: ** Alarm goes off. ** Snooze button; go back to sleep. ** Repeat. ** Mother: Get up already! You have to go to school! ** Troper: I'm up, I'm up. ** Back to sleep. ** Gets dragged out by ears. * This troper evokes this trope often. She will happily wake up after 9:00 so to not fuck up her sleep schedule, but don't expect her to be coherent. My morning schedule (for the weekends/holidays) tends to go a little like this: 9:00 - 10:30, wake up. Eat breakfast. Do absolutely nothing productive or converse with anyone until 12:00. * Me. Unlike most people, who operate on a 24 hour schedule, I run on a 30-hour schedule. Im always awake for about 20 hours, and then I sleep for 10. Unless I am interrupted by work or school. Which usually results in me getting a total of 5 hours of sleep during a 48 hour period. * In the rare occasion This Troper gets up before 11 o'clock, she will wander around like a zombie for an hour and a half more or less, and when it's less or she wakes up fine, she is most likely ill.Ironically, [[TruthInTelevision I]] ''[[TruthInTelevision do]]'' [[TruthInTelevision have low blood pressure]]. * I'm a rather odd case. School has conditioned me so that I can go to bed around 11:30 PM, wake up around 6:30 AM, and still be functional in about fifteen minutes. However, once that time passes, I can't wake up until at least 10:30, or, preferably, 12:00. On weekends I've been known to get out of bed around 12:45. * Natural routine for This Troper it seems would be sleep till 2 or 3

in the afternoon, complain about schoolwork while doing it the next few hours if its a weekday, use the computer for Troping and other stuff for until somewhere around 3 in the morning, go to bed, wake at 2-3 in afternoon... you get the idea. I'm active at night, not day, and it sucks that people want me to act ''vice versa''. * Unless I have college or anything else to do I rarely ever wake up before 1pm. I'm so tired from waking up I don't even bother drying myself after I've had my shower, I just sit on my bed with a towel around my waist and let myself dry. * Every time someone says "Good morning" to me, I have an urge to say "No, it isn't. I'm ''awake''." * This Troper loathes waking up before 12PM. If you attempt to wake me up, expect a beating from me regardless of who you are; just ask my entire family and my close friends. Some of them, including my sister, almost ended up with a broken limb just because they tried to wake me up. Thankfully, my college isn't a problem as I can make my own schedule. * This troper is naturaly not a morning person, but the fact that High school was an hour away and the only chem class in collage that fit in her schedual was at 8;30, she is able to function at 7 or so, [[MustHaveCaffeine with the aid of energy drinks]], on the weekends she plays it strait, waking up at 1 or 2 in the afternoon. * I'm not a morning person, and my shift starts at 7AM. Why, when I could have chosen one that started at 1PM? Because I'm NotAMorningPerson and I wouldn't be doing anything else with that time. My job isn't remotely mentally demanding, so I can wake up slowly over eight hours (with a nap at lunch break). * This troper hates mornings with a passion. I get up at 07:00 (OK, 07:15) in the mornings for school, but I am not functional until 10 or 11. The sad part is that I like most of my morning classes. I'm also a major jerkass in the morning, and I hate coffee. The only time I wake up in the morning without complaint is when I'm out camping--for some reason, this doesn't bug me the way it does when I'm at home. * According to her parents, this troper has been a night person since she was born. They would come home from a night out, with the baby sitter snoring on the couch, and the infant troper still smilingly awake and wanting to play. * This troper sternly refuses to wake up before 1 PM during the days where she doesn't need to go anywhere. This tends to make her father [[{{understatement}} upset]]. * This tropette. It's highly likely that she will strangle you if you try to talk to her before 9 a.m. After a big test at school, she had free time and warned her friends not to wake her up if she fell asleep for the reason that she would probably punch them. ** Also her brother, who once threw a shoe at her. * [[{{Tropers/Akiba}} This Troper]]'s natural sleep time tends to be 3:00 to anywhere between 11:00 and 14:00. Therefore, when he goes by society's schedule his mornings go like this: ** Alarm at 6:00. Shuts it off, back to bed. ** Alarm 2 at 6:15. Shuts it off, back to bed. ** Mother yells at him around 6:30. Gets out of bed. ** Eats breakfast. Still not fully awake.

** 6:45 [[RuleOfThree Back to bed]]. ** 7:00 Shower. Wakes him up somewhat. ** 7:30 Leaves for school/work. Wakes up fully by 9:00. * This troper, sort of. Yeah, I'll get up and do whatever, no complaining, no going back to bed. But I swear, if you try to get into my space before I've had a good half hour to get used to being up at such an ungodly hour, I '''will''' let you know that you're pissing me the hell off. * [[{{Tropers/MaximumSpiderMvC}} This Troper]] averts this hard. I absolutely hate it when I oversleep, becuase I lose the time I could be using on the computer or whatever sleeping instead. * [[{{Tropers/Anderling}} This Tropette]]'s entire family is this, to a certain degree. My mother is completely coherent in the mornings, but she's not actually ''awake'' until she has a bath or something sugary. My sister doesn't wake up until someone drags her out of bed and even then she ''radiates'' if-you-talk-to-me-you're-dead. Personally, I'm not officially awake before 9 am (more than halfway through first period at school), I act like a zombie for an hour after getting out of bed unless I really put some effort into it and if left alone, I tend to sleep in until 11 am. (The only reason I don't is that my alarm clock is right next to my pillow and turned all the way up, scaring the crap out of me.) * [[{{Tropers.Sharysa}} This troper]] suffers a moderate version of this, and [[ItGotWorse her insomnia]] doesn't help. While she is not as belligerent as some of the examples on this page, she is borderline mute until she has [[MustHaveCaffeine her coffee]]. * This troper would happily stay in bed until noon if he had the option. Sadly, school starts at 9...and his alarm clock was set for 6 until recently (got changed to 7 due to the risk of falling asleep again). This wouldn't be too bad if he didn't get to sleep until about 11PM on a good day (or should that be a good night?) and he literally can't get out of bed until he is reasonably awake, which can take anywhere from 5 minutes to nearly three quarters of an hour. AND he still requires tea to make himself feel awake enough to actually think. Ironically, he does very occasionally wake up at 4AM for no reason whatsoever, completely wide awake. * Like many other tropers who have graced this page, This Troper has something that suspiciously resembles DSPS, and has enjoyed sunrises before going to bed, oftentimes needing to dodge family members who actually are morning people. And even on my normal sleep schedule, it takes a very long time for me to actually get out of bed after I wake up (I have been known to annoy roommates because I hit the snooze button at least three times, resulting in the alarm going off at fiveminute intervals for fifteen or twenty minutes). My brother can actually get up far earlier than I can, but he's even less of a morning person. Many a time, I have barged into his room, demanding that he get up, as he's making us late. He will sit up in bed, look me dead in the eye, and grunt a vague affirmative. Fifteen minutes later, I'll barge in again and he'll be fast asleep with no memory of being woken up the first time. * Mornings are EVIL! I hate them. I don't want to get up when it's all bright and happy and stuff. Why don't people leave me alone? Who gets

up before three o'clock in the afternoon on a free day anyway. That's just wrong. I am a night owl. For the night is the time of dreams and solitude and being all pretentiously poetic and stuff. And don't get me started on breakfast...I don't really need food. Except for dark chocolate and Pink Lady apples that is. * Mornings are the bane of this troper's existence. Like...when I had morning classes, my normal greeting to the professor was "You suck." When I had to work mornings, I had to bite my tongue or I would have unloaded viciously. Me? A morning person? Heck no. I'm a night owl. But there's no telling that to this troper's poodle, the fluffy, walking alarm clock. * [[Tropers/HikartiFlutist This troper's]] best friend a total bitch in the mornings, its best to act like she's not there until she addresses you. This troper herself won't get out of bed for almost an hour after being woken up for school at 6AM, but was wide awake on a school trip when the wake up time was 5AM after a mere 5 hours of sleep and a previously busy and hectic day. Of course, the trip was to Disneyland for band, but HEY. There's also a story from that trip about how one girl woke her room mate who wouldn't get up by scaring her awake. Krista went from this trope to InstantWakingSkills in three seconds flat. It's impressive how many of us ''were'' awake every morning when we were supposed to be, given our utter exhaustion from the previous day's events. ----Mmmmmmpppppphhhhhh... oh please, I'm {{Not a Morning Person}}, lemme sleep a couple more minutes, it's still 11:00 AM! ----

NotBloodSiblings * Narrowly averted when this troper was eleven; he and his twelveyear-old not-quite-stepsister (parents dating, not married) nearly Went All The Way but were stopped at third base when Mom and Dad pulled the car into the driveway. Parents broke up shortly thereafter and the opportunity didn't present itself again. Since the incident happened in the summer of 1989 and both parties involved had developed the requisite pubescent reproductive abilities, had the act been allowed to proceed to its conclusion I realized this past summer that I'd be a 31-year-old with a kid about to start college. Waiter, the BrainBleach, please! ** You do realize that the chance of actually getting somebody pregnant with an average (IE: fully developed, not 11) size load of semen on a woman who is ovulating at the normal intervals is just under (or was it over?) 30%, right? You would probably just be a very lucky guy if you went all the way. *** I'm a gambling man, and I wouldn't lay 3 to 1 against the proposition. I've heard of shotgun weddings where the guy knocked up the girl, but have there ever been shotgun weddings where the woman's son knocked up the guy's daughter? *** ...Did you find something odd about the idea of an ''elven- and twelve-year-old'' getting to third base, even if they didn't do the deed?

**** ''That'' was the [[BrainBleach Brain Bleach-ey]] part of the story for me, not the Not-Blood-Siblings part. * This troper's parents ended up inadvertently becoming this when, after their respective spouses died, Grandpa (my dad's biological father) married Grandma (my mom's biological mother). I shit you not. Squicky or no, it happened five years after his own parents were married and they refused to break up our family just because ''their'' parents were weirdoes. ** I'm very sorry, but because there's nothing genetically wrong with that arrangement, I fail to be squicked. In fact, if I were you or your dad, I'd find it hilarious. If I were grandpa, I wouldn't think anything of it, and would give you and dad a weird look if you were squicked out. ** Actually, I don't care at all; I just say that to keep the morons from getting squicked. Grandpa's dead now, and dad does indeed find it funny. ** This Troper has something similar: Although his parents (obviously) are not related, they share a common cousin because someone's sister married the other's cousin cousin... or something like that. ** This troper's family is exactly the same. The only difference is in the times that the respective spouses died and the time difference between weddings. Nobody finds it squicky at all. Some people have found it funny, but that's the extent of reaction. * This troper knows a couple where the whole stepsiblings possibility only came up ''because'' they were dating. The parents only met because their children were dating, and then they started going out. I haven't been keeping up with the local gossip in my hometown since I'm off at college, so I don't know which, if either, of those couples are still going out, but it would be totally weird no matter what. * This Troper once saw a talk show about twins separated at birth. One guy wound up marrying his identical twin's adoptive cousin; they seemed to find it funny rather than gross, though I have to wonder about a woman who would marry someone identical to her cousin. ** Clone-fetish? * [[Tropers/MichaelJJ This troper]] once had a boss who he was pretty friendly with. She told me one day that she had a relative who married her adoptive brother and had a kid with him. This repulsed her (though, from what else she told me, that was not the worst thing about her). ---This page and Main/NotBloodSiblings are ''totally'' not related. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NotBrainwashed * [[MmmKay This troper]] had a dream involving the comedy version of this trope. In the dream, a freak opening in the parking lot of some famous mall has opened up, revealing a cave made of nothing but Glowing Golden CartoonCheese. The cheese seemed to have a drawing effect, luring rats, cats, and other animals despite protective headgear. The troper in question was the only one who could solve the

mystery, and I did. It wasn't anything supernatural, merely ThePowerOfCheese, [[IncrediblyLamePun literally]]. I could've come out whenever I wanted too, but... that was the best cheese I've ever tasted. * [[{{Edrobot}} This Troper]] was planning a MegaCrossover FanFiction, when he came up with the following scenario. After absorbing the CosmicKeystone, the BigBad builds the VeryDefiantlyFinalDungeon in AnotherDimension. So then everyone splits into teams to chase after her. One particular team was lead by Yoskue Hanamura, of Persona4 (who isn't even close to being the main character). Then this happens: -->'''BigBad:''' Fool! You might have been able to defeat a Goddess... but can you defeat ''your precious [[TemporaryLoveInterest Sakisanpai]]''?\\ ''* BigBad reveals that she has revived [[TemporaryLoveInterest Saki Konishi]], and made her into some sort of cyborg.* '' \\ '''Yoskue:''' Please. Is that supposed to scare me? All we have to do is [[BeatTheCurseOutOfHim beat her up a bit and she'll snap out of that weird mind-control thing you have on her]]. That's how this sort of thing usually works\\ '''Saki:''' Yoskue, I'm not brainwashed. I really do want to kill you.\\ '''Yoskue:''' Riiiiiiiiiiiiight...\\ ::...ItMakesSenseInContext. ---Wait, why ''is'' that man heading over ''there?'' He must be ''{{Brainwashed}}!'' * No, wait, he was just returning to [[NotBrainwashed the main article]]. ** But '''''[[TvTropesWillRuinYourLife why?]]''''' ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NotCheatingUnlessYouGetCaught * This Troper's father was a AAA hockey player for several years, and he has numerous stories about referee blindness. His personal favorite is an inversion: in one game, an opposing player knocked Dad's helmet off while checking him. Noticing that the ref didn't see it, Dad threw himself to the ice as if he had been shot. The ref looked over and slapped the opposing player with a penalty. You better believe he was mad. * This troper's brother found an unbeatable strategy in [[JohnMaddenFootball Madden NFL 11]]. It involves stealing the opponent's signals by turning the commentary off, allowing him to listen to the opponent's strategy through voice chat. Only one of his opponents has discovered the strategy, and said opponent was leading 14-0 at the time. Unfortunately, my brother was playing as the Eagles, and ended up winning 31-20 thanks to Michael Vick's GameBreaker status. * [[@/HersheleOstropoler I]] volunteered with a political campaign years ago[[hottip:*:as in, the candidate has since passed on]]. We

were told to (illegally) put posters on lampposts and electrical poles. If spotted they'd be taken down, if not, well ... * [[Tropers/SabresEdge This Troper]] witnessed a rather impressive version of this in (what else?) ''[[{{Game/Munchkin}} Munchkin]]''. After a player had just played all of the cards in his hand, he proceeded to pull out another card ''from his sleeve'' and play it, earning himself widespread applause from our group. * Standard procedure in this troper's family, combined with rules lawyering and RefugeInAudacity. A particularly funny instance happened during a game of Liar[[hottip:*: also known as "BS" in some circles]], when this troper's uncle played his entire had at once and deadpanned "Two aces" (for those unfamiliar with the game, each player is dealt a fraction of the deck; a normal hand is ~20 cards). This troper called him on it... before ''switching hands with his mother'' and winning seconds later. * This troper once had a group project in English class where we all had to read ''TheBrothersKaramazov'' one of those thick Russian novels [[CramSchool on top of all our other assignments.]] This troper was the only one in the group actually ''reading'' the book, the others just moved the bookmark forward two hundred pages or so every night. [[BeingGoodSucks This troper got yelled at for "reading so slowly."]]

NotDistractedByTheSexy * [[@/HersheleOstropoler Myr]] girlfriend used to [[LongDistanceRelationship live in]] [[VivaLasVegas Las Vegas]], where pictures of half-naked women are a common sight. I actually became more or less inured to it, except for my girlfriend. * [[PoochyEXE This troper]], probably due to having seen WAY too many advertisements trying to sell worthless crap via scantily-clad females, ends up not being distracted by the sexy more often than not. Rather useful for Last Message on ''BeatmaniaIIDX''. * This troper has been a member of a nudist community all her life. Naked and half-naked bodies are essentially asexual to her. (''[[GorgeousPeriodDress Clothes]]'', on the other hand...) * This Troper, who is quite possibly an {{asexual}} in deep denial often fails to notice things that have his friends quite easily distracted. * Strange version of this. At an all boy school, with VIth form girls (17/18), who my gay male friend is regularly hit on by. Considering my class is a load of hormonal 16 yr old boys, and these girls are universaly very hot, he is the only one NOT Distracted By The Sexy, which can lead to some interesting moments - especially when probably the hottest girl in the school came up and started kissing his neck, and half our maths class were just drooling. * This troper is of the opinion that 5 minutes on 4chan will desensitize anyone to anything. ** And even less than 5 minutes on 4chan's /b/ board. ** Where as going on /D/ will simply destroy your sexuality....or turn you into [[CompleteMonster something else]] * As part of my CrazyPrepared training, I have tried to remain unaroused and undistracted while watching pornography. I can usually

last ten minutes or so before failing. * [[ArrowDnarrow My]] dad stopped at a traffic light on the way home one day. Out of the corner of his eye he notices a lady waiting by the bus stop. A lady wearing a very short dress. Then he notices that everyone around him and on the other side of the traffic light are looking at her. One the light turns green he creeps forward into the intersection and sees that the people now stopped are looking at her. He drives right through the intersection laughing his head off because the people who were waiting first haven't moved at all. * School play. My role is to look at a girl over a table. Her dress is rather shoddily made, and halfway through the scene it partially falls off. I'm informed that I'm the only person who didn't notice this, as evidenced by my first words when the play was over being "Well that went well". * This troper (and her classmates) were trained to be like this. Being in the medical field requires some serious willpower- or asexuality. * This Troper is either ''very picky'' or just {{Asexual}}, because in a play our school was invited to watch, there was a guy playing a demon, being a WalkingShirtlessScene.Girls screamed.The only thing This Troper thought at the time was "Can't they just shut UP AND WATCH THE DAMN PLAY?!". After that, came a MsFanservice, all FetishFuel in place.Guys whistled.This Troper thought the exactly same thing she thought earlier. * At the age of 9, I had already found out the you can find porn on the internet, and I fully used it. At the age 11, I discovered anime, and hentai. at the age 14, I barley pop boners when I'm faced with a girl wearing a g-string at the beach. I aperently got used to this kind of stuff, and when I told my associated this, they said was suppose to take it in moderation, so that way I don't look, different, when ever sexy women went by. * [[Tropers/MegTheMaggot This]] {{Asexual}} Troper is never DistractedByTheSexy. Since I am still in high school, when most people are drunk of hormones and new-found sexuality, this is a minor super power. * This troper rarely, if ever, actually reacts to sexy females, to the extent that he once was bored enough to watch porn...and got so bored he closed the page within five minutes. Funnily enough, he is sort of asexual (he does have a sex drive, but lets just say that it hard to notice, due to a refusal to tell rude jokes and isn't a dating sort, let alone the marrying sort). * This troper loves his sporting events. Scantily clad cheerleaders? Scantily clad, drunk, female fans? Bah! I'm waiting to see what line's coming out to start the powerplay! * This troper witnessed this when one of her friends attempted to seduce one of the local gamer boys, showing up at a D&D party wearing a mini skirt and cleavage-baring shirt, face painted and hair curled. After she had breathed a particularly Marilyn Monroe-like greeting and positioned herself so that her cleavage was most visible, the object of her affection simply said "Hello" and went back to his attack roll. * [[Tropers/{{Smerf}} This]] troper was visiting with some lady friends (all of whom had a thing for him) while studying some physics. They then spent a hour or so using their hand to, uh, "distract" him.

The troper was thoroughly distracted, but kept changing pages and pretending to study. Hey, they would have stopped if I had let on. * I see the most scantily clad women every single friday and saturday night. I have just stopped caring about perving at them all as its just "boring" as it's so common. I still think its hot, i just don't care to stare because it's pretty pointless when i can focus on other things more enjoyable (like reading) * I'm a [[{{Asexuality}} gray ace]], which means that I do see the sexy in women, I just don't want to have sex with them. This also gives me the ability to pretty much ignore the sexy by default, and only acknowledge it when I choose. [[HeartIsAnAwesomePower Gray Asexuality Is An Awesone Power.]] ** Are you a male version of me? I see the sexy in shirtless guys (up to and including yaoi guys, eh...[[UnusualEuphemism Planting the tree of love]]. However, just because I want to see two handsome men jumping in bed with each other doesn't mean that I want to jump in bed with one or both of them. * At this Troper's college, close to 70% of the students are female, and half-naked women are a common sight around here - so much so that this Troper's long since been desensitized to them. It certainly helps that he's asexual. * I'm pretty sure this goes for all of us, but when I was little, I was a master of this. * This troper's looked at NC-17 rated yaoi fanart so much that when she looks at it, she goes, "oh, that's nice," and closes the window. * Call me a weirdo, but when it comes to photos, no matter how scantly clad the subject is(heck even if they are just flat out naked) this troper finds himself not distracted by the sexy if the subject is not smiling, and instead will just get frustrated at the fact that the picture feels incomplete because of the lack of a smile. * This troper is a very easily set off DepravedBisexual, but doesn't see the point in making anything sexy outside of porn or hentai. I'm only distracted by the sexy [[ADateWithRosiePalms when I want to be.]] * This Troper was playing a [[TeamFortress2 TF2]] custom map and there was a Spy with a Cloak and Dagger waiting in front of a sexy spray tag waiting for new people to come in and backstab. So I played as Sniper and walked towards the spray, with my friend watching. I didn't know it was there, but I thought it was a trick. I got there and through my paranoia, I turned around, killing the spy unexpectedly with my SMG. I could hear lots of laughter thorugh my friend's microphone. I replied with this: -->'''Me''': Paranoia: 1, Perverted Nature: 0. * [[{{Tropers/Fearmonger}} This troper]] never noticed [[{{Halo}} Cortana]] was naked until reading about it on the internet. ---Go back to NotDistractedByTheSexy * What the- didn't you see [[ReadyForLovemaking me]]!? <<|TroperTales|>>

NotEvenBotheringWithTheAccent * Can be TruthInTelevision, of sorts: some people do nail the accents

of their acquired languages. This troper had a Chilean Spanish teacher who recounted coming to the States with a ''British'' accent, because her English teachers in Chile were British. She dropped it, but could revert on cue. It sounded pretty authentic to this Yankee. ** This troper's father, on a school trip to France, was asked if he was from Marseilles. Turns out his teacher had a pretty strong accent, and the class had picked it up! ** This troper had a prof of Finnish extraction with an impeccable upper-crust English accent. The subject he taught? Arabic philosophy. *** ...THE HEEEEEEEEELLLL? This Spanish troper has always had native British teachers, so she picked up that accent. And then she entered High School and had to cope with a moronic teacher -- she had to correct the ''teacher'', who wouldn't stop making mistakes. So she decided to just waste her time on the Internet instead of studying English with that kind of teacher -- guess what, now she can turn on and off her accents, which are about 5 or 6 (a sort-of-British one, Cockney, Australian, Southern American, 'Newscaster' American, and probably something else.) ** This troper lives in a country where everyone has English as a Second Language. You can generally tell the natioanlity of their orginal English teacher from their accent. * This troper would think that ANY schooling in a foreign language spoken in several countries would result in this trope. My Spanish studies tried to prevent this by having Mexican and Standard Spanish pronunciations in the textbook. ** This troper, on the other hand, wasn't informed that she spoke Spanish with an Argentinian accent until she went to Spain. *** Meanwhile, this Troper spent most of high school Spanish being corrected by other students for speaking Spanish with her father's Colombian accent instead of the teacher's Spain-Spanish. They even tried to correct her pronunciation of her own surname. **** [[{{Gabel}} This troper]] being Swedish has a variety of accents. When he was in London, after a week he sounded like he'd lived there all his life, but can also do a wide array of US accents. The same are true for his friends. This is common in Sweden, with the ones being the best at English having close to no Swedish in their accents. *** This troper, an Australian, picked up a Canadian accent as a child due to having an exchange teacher in kindergarten, and later in life picked up a Liverpudlian accent (which lasted for a couple of months) from watching a Red Dwarf marathon. Her accent is now warped and she is constantly asked "Oh, I don't recognise your accent, where are you from?" *** Ditto this Troper. Early in life, I slurred my words so badly I could barely be understood. Because of this, I got incredibly frustrated and enunciate my words so carefully I apparently sound Upper Class Brit, and am regularly asked if I moved from England. *** I've been told that Canadians are slightly more soft on the ears than American accents. People have asked this Troper if she was from Canada, only to have herself in bafflement as she's never been to Canada except this one 3 day trip 17 years ago. ** One particularly horrifying example for [[ThirtyTwoFootsteps this troper]] involved a girl in one of his college French courses, who

would speak English with a mild New Yorker accent but exaggerated it when speaking in French. It got so bad that several people in class would raise their hands when she would just to keep her from speaking. The sad part? She was majoring in the language. ** This troper was once informed that his Spanish accent sounded Russian. He's American, has a completely normal American accent, but spent half his childhood in Russia. At least he gets told his Russian accent is flawless :) *** Do you ever say "Comrade"? ** This Canadian Troper learned French with a Qubcois accent, but for the life of him can't put on a Parisien accent. To make it even more confusing, whenever he's trying to speak English with a fake French accent, it's a Parisien accent, but he can't fake a Qubcois accent. * This Troper. Jamaican. It usually comes out when he's singing, though. *** So you intersperse the lyrics with "mon"? * This troper, after having spent most of his time actually using the language there, now speaks with a southern French accent when speaking french. Wei. * This troper, having taken French for several years from a native speaker, has developed a French accent when she speaks English and is often asked if she's from France. Compounding to the problem, she is also in Japanese classes (again from a native speaker) and has begun slurring her 'r's and 'l's in English (but speaks Japanese with a French accent). Depending on how she feels that day, she'll have a completely different accent to match. * This Troper's old high school drama club recently put on a production of ''Robin Hood'', with most of the cast using ([[OohMeAccentsSlipping or at least trying to use]]) [[FakeBrit british accents]]. The exception was one Venezuelan exchange student who didn't even bother trying, and her character's lines ended up being the [[EnsembleDarkhorse best part of the play.]] Latin American accent + Ye Olde Butcherede Englishe = [[HilarityEnsues Hilarity]] * Seen in virtually any foreign language class. In [[{{chitoryu12}} this troper's]] French class, he is one of three people who speak with a proper accent, and one of the other two is French himself and speaks it fluently (he's in the class only to learn spelling). Everyone else speaks with an American accent and often completely butchers the language to the point where someone who speaks it with a real accent can't even understand it. Another student in the class, who is Hispanic, speaks with a weird Spanish/French mix that people regularly laugh at because it sounds so forced. ** There are a few people in my Japanese class who clearly have a good knack for languages and could do really well... but every vowel and every 'r' is unmistakably American. * This troper has a Catalonian accent when speaking French. Wei. * [[NotSoBadassLongcoat This troper]] speaks English with a weird slipping pseudo-American accent that sometimes goes into Southern Drawl, mainly because he learnt English more from video games and Cartoon Network than at school. For fun, he can also imitate (more or less poorly) a [[{{Scotireland}} Scotirish]], Russian, Indian,

Japanese and Borat-like accent (that actually is a combination of his native Polish accent hammed up for gits&shiggles, manic rapid-fire speech and screechy NoIndoorVoice). * This Troper somehow managed to pick up a mild Scottish accent from his father (who had left Scotland for Canada 20-30 years before he was born), while neither of his brother's did. * AllanAokage has a minor variant of this, in that he has lived in Wales all his life... yet speaks his (only) language with a ''Polish'' accent, apparently. It's more a case of trying to remove his native accent since it's very hard to take a Welsh accent seriously. * I'm english, but I spent so much time on the internet and watching TV that I've picked up bits and pieces of an american accent, leaving me with a sort of non-accent. There's enough british in there that I still sound natural, but it's weird comparing my own voice to "'ello dere, I'm from brissol" * This Finnish troper hears some variation of "So where in the States are you from?" practically daily here in Ireland. * This troper is often complemented on his authentically accented Spanish (he's American)but no one can place it because he learned it while conversing regularly with 50% Mexicans and 50% others (Cuban, Puerto Rican, Columbian, and Guatemalan to name a few). * This troper had a Social Studies teacher from Quebec who had (allegedly) been speaking English for 28 years, but his accent was terrible and I was just about the only person in the class who could understand him. In relating his way of speaking to others, me Quebecois accent is now, apparently, perfect. * This Australian troper/fandubber finds American accents incredibly difficult without sounding Texan, so most of the time when she voice acts she just goes with her [[AustralianAccent cultivated]] one. But since Americans are somehow highly attracted to English and Australian accents and the cultivated one is sort of a cross between the two, it (mostly) helps more than it harms. * I can't seem to escape this trope when I speak Spanish. According to my mum, I speak Spanish with "un acento ingles". She's British, I grew up in America, and [[OohMeAccentsSlipping my accent tends to slip back and forth]] but according to her, my accent when speaking Spanish is ''simultaneously'' British and American. And I can't do ''that R thing''. Screw you, R thing. Rrrrrr. * [[TheTallOne This (very, very, frighteningly, upper-Midwestern) White Tropette]] had to rap once as part of a comedy routine for school. I didn't even bother actually attempting to rap, and wound up speaking the words in a normal tone of voice. HilarityEnsued, as everyone else ''could'' rap, and I wound up being the funniest bit in the entire show by accident. * Fun fact: In Minnesota, while the stereotypical Scandinavian accent mainly appears in people over the age of 50 and is quickly dying out, most any Minesootan can revert to it on cue. Otherwise most speak a very boring Newscaster. --> '''Minnesota Speak''': Yeah, we decided to go to that Italian place up the street, just North of the theater. --> '''Minnesoota Speak''': Oh yah, shyure, we, oh, we wen' up to dat' Idalian place up da' street 'dere, jas' Nord' o' da' deater',

don'tchya know. ** Ha, so true. Although, this troper still frequently uses 'yah' as a part of her vocabulary, most likely due to her mother, who is, whaddaya know, over the age of 50. This is often lampshaded by my Wisconsinite father, which is ironic as his mother came from Faribault. Also, I pronounce 'for' as 'fur' but that's probably more of a personal thing. And long 'o's can sometimes be heard, but otherwise, yeah, there isn't really an accent. * This troper is very much your average American Midwest girl. The natural accent of the area is generally known as the 'Newscaster' accent (non-regional and all that jazz); my own accent has a slight, mysterious Southern slant to it. Despite only having one blood relative from the South, I've frequently been asked which Southern state I moved to Illinois from. I can affect full-blown Southern belle, decent California surfer/hippie, perfect Valley Girl and okayish Minnesotan, too, thanks to exposure from either family or television. Additionally, it was several months into my first year of high school Spanish before I could speak without a slight Italian accent. Strangely enough, I'd never been to Italy, met an Italian or ever learned the language. Now I can speak Spanish with a convincing enough accent (somewhere between Mexican and Puerto Rican, I've been told), along with a small amount of Italian with an accent that fooled a native speaker. * This troper grew up with the "Electronic Babysitter" quite a bit growing up (i.e. they put me in front of the TV a lot so I wouldn't get into trouble), so my accent is the very generic 'Newscaster' accent (essentially the American equivalent of BBC English.) This is especially funny since I live in Tennessee, and it put me in a weird paradox. Among friends, most believe I sound Northern, if not downright foreign (one person thought I sounded German. Go figure.) However, when I left for college (still in Tennessee, but much more diverse and with a large number of international students) everybody thought I sounded "pure hillbilly." However, this has given me something of a theatrical advantage, as I can use fake any accent fairly well, and can thicken my accent if I want to. * This troper almost did this when he had to do an American accent during his Drama exam (ok, chosing "Of Mice And Men" for the exam wasn't the best idea we'd ever had, but our's was apparently the most dramatic because we did [[{{TearJerker}} the last scene]]). However, he was determined to go for it and managed (just) to nail it. * When this troper family arrived to Spain her mother hated the country so much that making me keep my Ecuadorian accent became her main task in life (before she divorced my father and returned to Ecuador). As a result people would assume I arrived to Spain recently when I've spent more than six of my formative years there. I was part of the drama club in my school, when doing old plays I tried to fake a standar European Spanish but for Garcia Lorca plays I give up trying to do the Southern accent and sounded very South American for a maid of Granada. * This troper grew up moving all over the US, and lived in Finland, Spain, and Hong Kong for a few years. She now lives in Chicago, but goes to a boarding school where a lot of the students are

international. I speak English, Finnish, decent Spanish, and am taking Chinese. Chinese kids think I'm European when I speak Chinese, American students think I'm either southern or English, European kids think I'm Scandinavian, and Spanish/Latin-American kids think I'm English. I can't catch a break here. * I, Prime Evil, am a master of most voices and accents, given enough research and preparation. However, I don't even bother trying when I'm impersonating "Power Rangers'" Rita Repulsa, mostly because high voice + screechiness would shred my vocal cords. So I just settle for a Deem Bristow-era Dr. Eggman voice. It works, for the most part. * I think I have some mental block that keeps me from faking an accent. I've had my mental voice develop an accent after things like watching ZeroPunctuation for too long, but I can't even attempt to speak in it. ---... Meh, forget it, I'm NotEvenBotheringWithTheAccent. Just go back to the main page. It's {{Wiki Word}}ed right there. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NotGoodWithPeople Before adding personal examples, please remember that this trope is about '''preferring the company of non-humans.''' Simply having poor social skills is not an example of this trope. * This troper is a prime example of this trope, alternating between the 'shy' and 'grumpy' versions depending on their mood. Suffice to say that they have dubious social skills and a tendency to regard the vast majority of the human race with either suspicion/hostility, or total indifference (e.g., while in uni they once commented that they weren't too bothered about what the next year's flatmates would be like since 'flatmates are like furniture, they come with the flat'). Attempts at socializing generally don't go very well since in their own words, when it comes to people 'I don't know what to do with them'. However, they have a soft spot for animals, particularly dogs which they consider to be much better then humans because they're loyal, easy to deal with and befriend, don't care about your faults, and are incapable of malice (well, mostly). The fact that dogs always like this troper, who apparently seems weird/creepy to people, is a major bonus. * [[DarkInsanity13 This troper]] is never sure what to say when dealing with others that aren't her friends. She appears somewhat friendly, but acting as such is typically the best way to get out of such a situation. Conversations are often awkward and strained, as if it's not about anime or anything she particularly cares about, she's fine with just listening. She doesn't mind animals (mostly cats), and will often play with a pet rather than socialize. This is likely because animals can't really voice their dislike of you very much, and are very easily pleased and don't make scathing remarks. ** Replace 'cats' with 'dogs', and you have a perfect description of

[[{{Wolfgirl44}} me]]. Down to the way I'd have phrased that if I were typing it. * [[{{Nomic}} This troper]] seems to make people uncomfortable with his mere presence (for some reason people can't tell exactly what it is that makes them uncomfortable around him), and conversations with him tend to be very strained if not about his hobbies or areas of expertice. He usually comes across as either shy or downright hostile to people he doesn't know. He seems to get on rather well with animals tho, and enjoys spending time around them. ** Same with [[{{Ihitterdal}} this troper]]. I am actually good with animals, though. What can I say? They don't throw things at you or insult you. Instantly above 90% of people. ** This troper lives by a quote from Ganredhel of [[TheElderScrolls Oblivion]]: "Dogs are friendly, loyal, and stupid. People are mean, deceitful, and smart. I prefer dog." * This troper's uncle is a Type 1, but with computers rather than animals. * This troper is a definite Type 2. When talking about my own species, I can become extremely cynical and insulting. At social gatherings, I'm more likely to be having a conversation with the host's cat or dog than with the host's friends. * [[{{Bookhobbit}} This troper}}]] is mostly a type-one, with type-two tendencies. I really just prefer books. ** Are you me? My refuge in every year of school was the library. I also carry a book with me wherever I go so I don't have to talk to people. * [[AcrossTheStars This troper]] vastly prefers to confine her interactions, save those with her close friends, to the internet and hide amongst her horses. She's mostly a Type 1, but can turn into a Type 2 when ticked off. * This troper is a Type 2, except he has an affinity for computers and technology instead of plants and animals. And he doesn't think HumansAreBastards, but merely finds roughly one-third to one-half of the population [[HanlonsRazor insufferably stupid]]. * This troper is convinced that humans are lying, backstabbing cowards who only want to use you. (So Type 2 then.) Give me a dog over a human any day. Though I'm surprising good with infants and toddlers. maybe because ChildrenAreInnocent? * This troper gets along ever so much better with technology and animals than other humans, at least face-to-face (text is better.) Animals don't care if I don't understand generating functions, don't care if I can't phrase things in ways that make sense, don't care if I get panic attacks that have me hiding from anything human. Machines aren't forgiving if I do stupid things, but they don't judge. People... the ones my age think I'm nuts (probably true), the older ones think I don't apply myself (sometimes true but a lot less than they accuse me of), the slightly younger ones think I'm some sort of amusing wreck to stare at... my little cousins, ranging from three to six, are all right, they all don't judge me really, but even the littlest ones are afraid of me. I don't know why, there's nothing visibly scary about me... Horses, dogs, computers, though, none of them give a damn if I'm nuts.

* This Troper has a friend who is like this. I am the only human he will talk to, if anyone else tries talking to him, he wont talk back or will come across as a bit rude to them, although most people I know dont like him much, because they think he is a bit weird. He loves animals, especially cats, but will even talk to insects. He loves spiders, and is upset that people kill them. * [[{{Sionnach}} This troper's]] work colleague is the living embodiment of Type 1. He's usually quite sweet and he's a genuinely nice guy, but if there's a choice between staying in the office with the rest of this troper's workmates and taking one the dogs out for a walk, then he'll always go for the dogs. He works in an Animals' Home, and he could go into a ''lion'''s den and have them wagging their tails in five seconds flat. He also doesn't like being in rooms where there are too many people, especially ones he doesn't know. * This Troper is very reluctant to talk to anyone except a teacher/professor/coworker, and even then usually only out of necessity. He loves animals and anything cute, and usually gets major CutenessProximity when within visible range of a dog or cat (almost dangerously so). What's sad is that on both counts he used to be ''even worse.'' * Type 1, mostly. I can talk to people who are my friends, but a lot of times I find people...confusing. They probably find me confusing. However, I have one-sided conversations with animals, and I'm pretty attuned to their body language. * [[SpiriTsunami This troper]] is a definite type 1, although for a long time, the affection for animals [[AnimalsHateHim was somewhat one-sided.]] * [[Callahan This troper]] is a former Type 1, mostly Type 2 now. Humans are assholes, animals are self-serving but rarely illintentioned, as well as much easier to understand... It's really not a tough choice, she thinks. * This troper is for the most part Type 1 but would be Type 2 at times, even to the point of using the term "twoleggers" and writing several stories through the perspective of a type of animal and just randomly insert something about how terrible humans are. * This troper is terrible with people but gets along well with many different animals. I'm a bit of both type 1 and 2, cause humans are a bunch of jerks but I never know what to say to the ones I interact with. But I get along well enough with animals, everything from house cats at my cousin's house to every dog at school. My two favorite moments were the lioness at the Denver Zoo who sat next to me, well we were separated by a huge sheet of glass but still. The other is the red tail hawk that I'm learning to handle as part of a special program at school. We're so relaxed around each other he feels comfortable preening while I hold him, which he does with no one according to his handler. * This troper was kept inside as a child and wasn't really allowed to have friends. I had cats though. I like cats. They can't call you names. * [[{{Theologica}} This troper]] feels she may fit into this trope, also. She's pretty good with computers (well, most of the time -- she doesn't program, but she does know Linux pretty well), and ''adores''

cats, getting on very well with cats. She's probably the type 1 -- she is actually very very shy around people, but is much better in text than she is in person. She has also been known to beat the crap out herself after face-to-face meetings with people. * This troper used to be this: he would actually find it easier to talk to animals (and toys) than people. How did he get over it? Well, it's a very long story, but, to cut it short, I basically spend a summer holiday in a different country (without anything that I could talk to that wasn't a person) and improved slightly, then spent the next as a part time sailing instructor, where talking with people was mandatory, and I basically outgrew it. * This troper is borderline, alternating depending on the mood. He's not very social and very reclusive, and in his younger days was a type one. He's slowly but surely heading towards type two, and he's especially cranky around small kids. He was afraid of dogs and cats at first, though he's gotten used to them over time, and prefers their company. * This longtime reader's current job says it all: She's been working as a stablehand for a quiet barn for some time now because it's one of the few kinds of work she can stand. She is fond of saying "I can deal with what comes from the back-ends of horses much better than what comes from the front ends (mouths) of people." She can approach a thousand-pound powerful animal with no fear - yet talking to retail customers and managers in the past has, at times, has sent her into full-blown panic attacks. Give her horses and barn cats - messes included- any day. If invited to someone's house, her immediate attention will go to the resident cat, dog, or bird. While generally nervous around people outside of the Internet, if you're a stranger walking a dog - she is likely to approach you and ask to pet your dog. For her, humans are angst - beasts are calm. * I'm a blend of Type 2 and Type 1, but with computers instead of animals. (I'm not actually that much more comfortable around animals than around humans; I'm hardly any ''less'' shy and awkward with unfamiliar animals than with human strangers. Also, I actively dislike dogs because they're messy and loud and [[CutenessProximity make other people act really obnoxious and sickening]].) I'm kind of a {{Tsundere}} for my computers -- they're not that much less frustrating than people when they act up -- but I still get way more emotionally attached to them than to the humans I know. * This Troper finds people are overly judgemental and make a big deal over tiny little slip-ups and can never let anything go. People also ask too many questions and then complain when I give an answer that they don't like (which is every answer apparently). Animals are much easier to be with. * When confronted with people, this troper usually seeks out the nearest cat and hangs out with it instead. When you come to her house, expect her to give you a shy smile and wave, and then retreat into her room to curl up with her cat and her laptop. In fact, that's what she's doing right now. * This Troper certainly doesn't look down on their fellow humans. Some of them are fun sometimes. But, because of my mind and my "obscure interests" [[SarcasmMode (like calculus!)]] not many people are

interested in the same things as me. I can count the number of people I can have a sincere or intellectually engaging conversation with on my left hand. Thankfully, trees do not need conversation, and I always feel at home with them. Also, large groups of people really make me uncomfortable and nervous, because they're always so frantic and busy and it makes me lose my center. * This editor is a type 2, combined with SnarkKnight. She thinks of most humans as being annoying, loud, and stupid, and easily prefers the company of [[NonHumanSidekick her cat]] over anyone else. She also [[CloudCuckoolander converses with goldfish]]? * This Troper is a type two, and really only associates with his gaming group, and that's twice a month. I tossed in a character concept for last month's game (an anti-social half-drow scout), and the dm looked at me and said " so you wanna play a half-elf with your personality?" * This troper is a total recluse, and if you meet her on the street, chances are she'll be a) silent or b) anxious. If you've got a dog with you, however, she'll cheerfully talk to it and (if it's that kind of dog) get down to play/cuddle with it. * This troper knows a guy who's actually really nice, but alternates between grumpy and shy. He's so sweet when you get to know him, but he's really awkward to talk to otherwise. He's also an unwilling FriendToLivingThings (animals seriously just come up to him and try to make friends with him) and has a ridiculous green thumb. * This troper is practically a hermit, speaks fluent Cat and quite a bit of Dog, and is more than happy to live a thousand miles away from any non-work-related contacts (or even telecommute, given the choice). Ironically, a career in largely customer service positions has led to a silver tongue - but only over a phone line. * Oye, I'm bad with people even in my dreams. Case in point: I dreamed that I had to share a TV watching place on a bed with a semiattractive female individual. After a period of fidgeting, unsure of what to do, I flipped off the side of the bed, and rushed to the toilet to vomit. Yet I ended up pooping. ... Disregarding this shocking twist of an outcome, this does get to show that even my subconscious is aware of how I feel about being close to people. ---Yeah, he's NotGoodWithPeople. Might want to keep it short. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NothingExcitingEverHappensHere For all your 'turning your own boring, mundane neighborhood into a WeirdnessMagnet' needs. ---* [[{{Wander}} This Troper]] finds himself saying this exact phrase at least once a week, in an attempt to ''deliberately'' trigger this Trope. [[TemptingFate Consequences be damned.]] * This troper once said this about his grandmother's town. His exact

words were "Nothing interesting here ever happens except for the occasional car going by." * Unfortunately subverted in RealLife. Using this phrase and sighing heavily does not summon anything interesting. * I once made a joke that you can slowly dance across a street without having to worry about cars in my area. Later, out of, of course, boredom, I realized that it's more akin to a statement. * SanJose. Actually, that's false - it's interesting only if you're of age and have money... neither of which I has. At least New York satisfied my curiosity just by walking around and staring at people. * This troper lives in NYC (not Manhattan though) and can say nothing ever happens in her part of the city. Or if it does [[{{Hikikomori}} she wouldn't know]]. * This tropes lives out in in sticks. Nothing happens. There is one pub, one church and one small shop. And lots of sheep. * This troper lives in a town like this, but, surprisingly enough, sometimes things DO seem to happen just when I'm getting too bored for words and mention it. Spooky. Maybe I'm just good at predicting when the crazies here will start up. * This troper lives in a hamlet where the only place where you can spend money without getting into a car is at the pub. No church for half a mile, milk is up the road, but along a main road (the A1, if you were wondering) and there is only one pub. This troper is too young to drink, so guess how he spends most of his days. ** Crying? that ispretty close by. ** It's the same with this troper. It's a mile of corn fields from my house before the first building. Except for a bar. * [[{{Tropers/Trkzsoup}} This troper]]'s hometown, to a T. One main road, a couple small neighborhoods, two gas stations, one restaurant and lots of farms equals not much in the way of immediate entertainment. Thankfully, my friends (and myself, to a lesser extent) are what you could kindly call "creative" people. We manage to make things interesting--dry ice bombs, building a Tesla coil in the garage, the potato/lighter fluid/pooper scooper experiment that we [[NoodleIncident still aren't allowed to talk about]]... Being bored, scientifically inclined (in a mad science sort of way) and occasionally tweaking on too much caffeine, while surrounded by miles upon miles of empty fields, often does not end well. ** Excuse me, can I move in with you? And marry you? (Probably in that order.) ** Well, do you have anything against homemade white lightning stills? Because that's the current winter break project. * This troper keep saying and saying this in hopes that something will happen. Nothing ever does. The most exciting thing that's happened in hundreds of years is some guy got hanged for raiding a federal armory. * [[Tropers/SunnyV My]] town's claim to fame is mostly that it has a lot of rednecks. And fairs every now and then. * Nothing ever happens in this troper's neighborhood, except occasionally the coyotes will kill a cat. * Representing Toronto, Ontario, Canada. * kinda subverted, kinda played straight in the town i grew up in, it was literally in the exact middle of two towns, we had one police car

if that, everything would be quite for the entire year. but every year on cabbage night and Halloween all the teens from one neighboring town, and all the teens in the other neighboring town would all meet in my town, and destroy the place. one year they made a toilet paper spiderweb in the middle of the road using power-lines as supports. another year they set hay bails on fire on the bridge. every year they pegged houses with paint balls, eggs, and shaving cream, then everything would die down. things picked up though when the neighborhood kids started skating, being one of them i could determinately say, that is what kept me sane during those years. * This is ''exactly'' what happens in Dover, Delaware. * This troper lives near Springfield, Missouri. Nothing ever happens here but somehow they run everything in the state. * Welcome to Rockford. It's like a mini-city except boring. Think of every generic issue a city has, now take away anything exciting. Gangs? They're quiet. Someone is murdered? It's a big deal, cause it never happens. An accident? Everyone leaves their houses to look for blocks because it's that much more interesting than everything else. We only survive with internet, TV and the few events that happen here. If someone transferred here in high school, the first question every asked was "Why the hell would you come here?". It's nice but I'd like something to happen. * [[{{Tropers/Nayrani}} My]] village is exactly this. It's boring, it's small, everyone keeps to themselves, nobody seems to hang out with anyone anymore, the streets are almost always empty and technology seems to be sipping through. The only thing I usually hear is a dog barking... my own dog. Ironically, when I was a kid everything was so much exciting, we played games at my neighbor's house, we investigated a rundown building (which was supposedly owned by a witch), another building out on the field (a big half built house which sadly isn't there anymore), there was less factories around and it was a lot livelier. I guess things change when you grow up... * [[{{Tropers/Dwessie}} This Troper's]] house is nestled in a "Family Neighborhood" (Read: Screaming children and creepers, neither of which come out much) that doesn't even have a town. It's between a po-dunk town with nothing going for it but a college, and a po-dunk-ier town I tried to move out of that's most exciting hangout is a Dollar General. There are no jobs in either place. We share power with the Dollar General Town, and everything else with the college town, and apparently we share Cable with the ninth circle of Hell. NOTHING interesting happens here. My boyfriend finds it odd that I like his neighborhood, when he mentions that it's not as safe as it was. Also I'm the only one still amused that trains go by their house. OH! His neighborhood also has a pool. Yeah, I prefer his neighborhood. * The city where I have lived most of my life is so boring that I even started writing a story that starts exactly with that phrase. * This troper doesn't post in Troper Tales often, mostly because nothing happens around him. Not necessarily his town (though it is small and dull, a few here and there things do happen at times), ''him'' specifically. * Two Words. ''Perth Australia.'' * This troper's town and life in general are like this.

[[SubvertedTrope He thinks it's pretty awesome.]] ---What? Why are you hanging out here? NothingExcitingEverHappensHere. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NothingIsScarier * * [[spoiler: ^Well played.]] * [[{{Tropers/Etheris}} This troper]] would just like to take a moment to thank all of the trolls who've made this article go from HighOctaneNightmareFuel to a CrowningMomentOfFunny. Ghosts, heh :) * [[{{Tropers/HG131}} This troper]] isn't really afraid of our two resident ghosts (they're almost certainly my grandparents on my father's side), but they have startled us before. Both me and my parents have had knocks on our doors with nobody there to do the knocking. We've smelt cigarette smoke (none of us smoke, but my father's father did), and a house guest saw my grandmother in the hallway to my room, bathroom and the guest room (description matched her). However, both the said guest and myself are creeped out by the forest behind our house (neither one of us knew the other one was creeped out by it). I've personally heard someone say "Hi" when everyone else was asleep (female voice, no women in the house at the time of hearing, as my mother was in NY and the guest was long gone). * This troper got this after having anesthesia for her wisdom teeth removal. When she woke up, she realized that she had no dreams or thoughts while under anesthesia. From there, she proceeded to have an existential freakout, worrying if she really existed (or if she'd stopped sometime during the operation). Or what if she'd died while under anesthesia and no one told her, her life was an illusion, and she was going to wake up one day to the shock of finding absolutely nothing (a deserted plane with her as the sole inhabitant), or a totally dark, empty house like in that Garfield comic? She seems to have these issues every time she has anesthesia. * This troper's city of 80,000 people once had a power outage that lasted for three or four days. One evening during the outage I had to drive across town. The power had come back on in part of the commercial district, and there was enough emergency power in the municipal system to keep the street lights running - but nothing was open, and the streets were empty. It was also dark out and there was a light fog; the overall effect was post-apocalyptic. The strip malls and shopping plazas stood half-lit and empty, low dark boxes clustered in the back of abandoned parking lots - mountains upon mountains edging a concrete plain. Just driving through was terrifying for absolutely no good reason. * this troper once decided to go out driving in the middle of the night, it was very unnerving to drive in a mostly empty road, it didn't help that I sometimes see things that are not really there, after that this troper promised himself to never drive after midnight. * This troper was playing [[MassEffect Mass Effect]] and was messing around on one of the uncharted worlds at about 2 AM. Now, there's only

a certain area you can really explore, with the rest of the area colored in red on the mini-map to let you know not to go there. So what does this troper do? Go straight to the off-limits area. As I was driving there I noticed it was really quiet, so I started to get pretty paranoid, wondering if anything was going to happen. As soon as I crossed the line, a Thresher Maw (read: giant worm-monster that comes out of the ground ''right under me'') pops out and I promptly have a mini-heart attack, drop my controller, and turn off the Xbox without saving it. It took awhile for my heart to stop racing. * A little earlier, this troper was in her attic with a flashlight, trying to see why the light switch wasn't working. Suddenly, a gust of wind rattled my windows very loudly, then went completely silent. Needless to say, I think I'll just check it in the morning. ** Doesn't help that as I'm typing this, the wind keeps blowing the screen door around outside, and it's random creaking is almost enough to make me get up at shut the door. Almost. *** Shit, [[ParanoiaFuel the door just shut on it's own.]] I'm not going to sleep, apparently. * We run a self catering-house next to our own. After dinner once I thought I heard something. Later that night I tried going in to the house but the lock was broken. My dad went opened the house by going through the second floor window. I looked everywhere for this guy. He didn't appear making him more scary. * This troper found a poisonous spider in his bed. Goes to get the spray, comes back and it's gone. Troper sleeps on the couch. * One cold winter night, this troper felt a draft in the kitchen. The front door, located in the unlit adjoining room, had been opened. I gazed into the darkness, only to have my worst fears realized as the faint outline of the door became apparent. It suddenly occurred to me that, perhaps, in the still-unlit half of the house, someone might be there, who should not be there. It was a singularly terrifying experience, primarily for the fact that I had no idea whether or not anyone was there. * One of my hobbies is coming up with ideas for video games. One of my most recent ideas is for a haunted house in an RPG that is dedicated to this trope; instead of spooky music and halloween-themed monsters, there will be NO music and NO monsters... just the sound of the wind and your footsteps. To add to the tension, the wind will ''stop'' blowing once you get halfway through. Just when you're about to exit, you run into the boss (Who's FightWoosh music will start out a ''tad'' louder, just to get the gamer jumping). The boss? A dark-skinned man in a white business suit, with a red blindfold over his eyes and a rusty mace in his right hand, being held towards the floor. He never moves. Ever. He attacks by gliding across the floor into you, never so much as twitching. When he dies, he simply turns around and glides away while sinking into the floor. The kicker? This man will ''[[GiantSpaceFleaFromNowhere not be explained in any way at any part of the game]]''. Admit it, you just got the chills. ** Not really, that actually sounds really cliche, and the lack of any walking animations for the bad guy, or explanation, just sounds really lazy. Not to mention it sounds like the biggest slender man ripoff in history.

** I don't know, it sounded pretty good to this troper. *** This troper can top that easily. You play a man who enters a very large house late at night to get help to fix his car and the door locks itself the moment he enters the house. You need to try to find a way out of it while trying to find clues as the why the house is so quiet. Maybe halfway through the game, you find a letter by one of the house owners who mentions a monstrous creature living in the basement and a secret passage out of the house through said basement...while also mentioning concerns about their younger daughter who seems to be acting very strangely. In the resultant cutscene, the character turns around...to find a terrifying ghost of a young woman standing behind him (bear in mind that this entire game will be first person). After defeating the ghost (don't ask how, I haven't decided that yet), you realise that you should check the attic (which you can't check before this point). The way into the attic, previously unreachable, is suddenly down for you to climb up. When you check through the attic, you find the dead bodies of the other family members and a kayake paddle. When you collect the paddle, the family members stand up and try to kill you (the paddle will come in handy). On further investigation through the attic, you will find a silver crucifix and a strange note about how the family members tried to hide from the ghost that possessed their daughter, but it trapped them inside the attic. You can probably guess what happens next if I tell you it is basically a repeat of the letter, except that the ghost is harder to defeat and will start coming through the floor to try to kill you. When you finally defeat it, you realise that the only way out is through the celler, which is suspiciously empty until you find what looks like the exit. [[spoiler: it is actually the ghost again, who is determined to kill you this time by possessing you. However, the crucifix prevents you from being possessed, so she tries to kill you by summoning the celler monster: a giant maggot-like creature. After defeating it (and it can OneHitKill you by swallowing you, complete with first person view of your death), the ghost reveals it's real identity as the ghost of the murderer who owned the house centuries before the previous owners were even born. You finally must kill it before escaping out of the celler in a cutscene.]] True, it sounds a bit like AloneInTheDark, but who said you needed to be original? * This troper is extremely frightened by unattended memorials, especially ones on the site of what they're for. But there's nothing there, right? Nothing jumps out at you. There's nothing to distract you from the realisation of exactly where you are, what you're looking for. You're left alone in your own mind for a while, with knowledge of whatever horrible thing the place was built to ensure we wouldn't forget, and there's ''nothing at all'' to distract you from it... * This trope is why this troper cannot watch horror movies (or anything scary) at night. Her imagination is a very active one, so seeing anything remotely scary at night makes her mind go overtime to the point where she imagines things are going to jump out at her in the sleeping quiet of her home, even though she knows there's no conceivable way for anything like that to happen. Ever look up the list for Silent Hill monsters on a chilly early morning? It does wonders for keeping you awake and paranoid.

** This troper has exactly the same problem, right down to the Silent Hill monsters. The fact that she is a night owl and is the one who goes to bed last does not help. ** This troper has similar problems. I watched Nightmare on Elm Street, and I start dozing off, and suddenly feel something ''metal'' on my shoulder, and something like a chuckle. I wake up screaming. Nothing was there. ** Same problem here. This is why I never watch [[Series/DoctorWho Blink]] or MarbleHornets at night. *** [[@/PhoenixFire I]] once [[WhatAnIdiot watched both of those at night, one after the other]]. Naturally, the fire alarm went off in the middle of Entry 23. * This troper, after seeing his first internet screamer, did not fail to notice the fact that the screamer background looked a lot like his dining room... * These days, this troper's uncle, who she knows almost nothing about, lives in her family basement. She almost never sees him, and he's very quiet. Very, very quiet. He comes out more often at night. It's very dark on the main floor at night, and her uncle never turns on the lights. Some of her other uncles have had trouble with the law. This troper doesn't go downstairs at night anymore. ** Not to make light of your fears, but it wouldn't be more constructive to GET TO KNOW HIM, so you don't find him so scary anymore? * This troper enjoys going places she shouldn't (like the service hallways in malls), but the silent emptiness of said hallways is both part of the appeal and the reason she can't do it for very long. * This troper's house has so much junk (kitchenware, food containers, books, etc.) on the shelves and piled into Rubbermaid bins over the edge that it's not uncommon for objects to fall, leading to the occasional sound of a pot falling to the carpet or a few magazines sliding off the pile. Still, it's been enough to make him grab the nearest blunt object (an industrial-size paint stirrer that's basically a thick, solid wooden pole the size of his arm) and hold it close at hand. * ThisTroper holds that the creepiest thing is a place that is normally full of people, empty. Go to a school in the middle of the night, and try not to imagine all the things lurking in the shadows, and the silence. ** Its this troper's job to close a store in a mall alone, and the worst time is right before closing. The place is always deserted, but you always know there is a very real chance someone is there. Once the place is closed the locked doors actually make it seem a lot more safe. * [[FyreNWater This Troper]] has learned, the hard way, that an empty hospital at night is one of the '''scariest places''' to be in. Her footsteps echoed through the hallway, almost deafening in the silence. Most of the place was dark and lights only turned on when she got close to the motion sensors. The television in a waiting room was blasting static. The worst thing? The reception desk was empty, even though she had a scheduled appointment. Needless to say, this troper ''bolted'' out of there.

** [[SilentHill Television? What's going on with that television?]] * This troper can attest to the fact that not much is creepier than going somewhere and finding out it's empty, when you expected otherwise * This troper once found a room in a building in Italy. It was stone, apparently old, and she got really bad vibes from it, so naturally, she decided to explore it. It was also extremely dark, even though it was well-lit outside the room and the door was open. In fact, it was so dark, that without anything to light the way, this troper had to take tiny, careful steps for fear of falling down an unseen staircase or drop. Good thing, too, as there did turn out to be one in the room. Anyway, this was very very slow, so it took her about twenty minutes to get around the room. Though nothing actually happened in there and the only things she found were stone benches, glass cases, and a big glass wall, it was one of the most frightening experiences this troper has ever had. ** What was in the cases? ** something tells me your not too genre savvy * This troper was walking in a wood near the edge of a field in France with her mother. They came across what appeared to be the coach house of the nearby chteau, in a semi-restored state. It was a weekend, no breeze or drafts whatsoever, late afternoon, twilight beginning to fall. Although there were a few signs of work in progress, everything was put away for the weekend: there were no lights, front door firmly closed, absolutely no sign of anyone else present. We walk around the outside of the building, gaze at the back of it for a bit, peer in the windows, go around to the front again. The front door was now ajar. The front. door. was. ajar. Even more strangely, this troper's old mother suddenly started enthusing like a little girl, insisting "we ought to go in, we ought to go in." I couldn't get us away from there fast enough. ** Oh flaming heck. What did I read that for? What did I write that for?? And right before bedtime, too. ** that probably saved your life, we have bad vibes for reasons. * This troper was once in her local shopping centre with a group of friends when an announcement came over the speakers, saying ''Please be aware there has been an incident in the centre. Please await further instructions.'' We hung around there for a while and it repeated itself every few minutes or so, but nothing else happened. Eventually we decided to go find my mum and get the heck out of there. We still don't know what it was all about. ** Clearly someone prevented the zombie apocalypse via killing Zombie #1 before it could bite anyone. * A few years ago this troper and their family went on holiday to a cottage in Scotland. Said cottage was in the middle of nowhere, beyond remote (it was half an hour's drive to the nearest village) and in an incredibly bleak area (earning it the nickname 'The Land that Trees Forgot'). There were a couple of other cottages and a farm down the hill but we never saw the inhabitant, just evidence of their activities, eg we got up one morning and all the sheep were gone. The cottage was pokey, always dark, and was furnished mostly with apparently second hand stuff so that it looked like someone lived

there and had just vanished or something. It was also very,[[ItsQuietTooQuiet very, quiet]]. This troper spent the entire week on edge. ** More recently, this troper and family were driving back from somewhere at night when we stopped to get petrol. The petrol station was 24-hour and there was a car parked by the pumps, but there was nobody there. The car was empty, the area deserted and it was completly silent. We got out of there as fast as we could. * A year or so ago, my family left me alone for about a week, the first few days I was completely fine, about three days in, the sounds, just normal sounds, started to scare the hell out of me, I was sure the thump in the night was a thief, so much so that I eventually began carrying around a large butcher knife and, for some obtuse reason(that sounded good then)I wrapped myself in a blanket, I began talking to myself to fill in the silence. When my family eventually came back they found a dirty child, wrapped in a blanket, holding a rather large butcher knife, mumbling to himself and poised to attack the imaginary thief's. * This Troper and some friends were helping out at a Halloween Fair the city was hosting. The fair was being held in a field that was essentially barren. Only 2 houses were their, one of which was being used as the haunted house. The other was partially hidden behind a bunch of trees and looked deserted. Not that many people came to the fair, so this troper and her friends decided to go in the house. We went to the front door. Locked. We checked the windows. Locked. We went to the back door. Locked. We decided to give up and head back, and when we passed the front door, it was open. No car in the driveway or anywhere nearby. No lights on in the house. But the door that had been previously locked was now wide open. We rushed out of their as quickly as we could. ** More recently, this troper decided that she would muster up her courage and go in the house. Once again, the front door was locked, but interestingly, the back door was not. She go in and the lights are on. That should have been a relief, but instead it frightened this troper, because the house was supposed to be deserted. And then, just as she's ready to go into the next room, this troper hear a faint noise that sounds vaguely like moaning. This troper decided she wasn't going to bother with this house. Haven't gone near it since. ** What kind of moaning you could have stumbled on a burlesque house THAT would be awkward. ** Now we know where the above-mentioned zombie came from. * This troper is currently staying at the dorms for the summer. Pretty much all of the summer students won't be here until later on in May. Now I'm accustomed to the random noises that the rest of the people make, but now since no one is here, not even someone at the front desk, This troper gets the foreboding sense that something bad will happen... * Have you ever been in a supermarket and found the background music has stopped? [[ThatTroperTheTroper This Troper]] has. ** It happened to this troper once. She was walking along in an aisle and the store was relatively empty. She suddenly stopped and realized that it was extremely silent and she ran to find her mom.

*** This troper was in a computer shop once when all the lights went out. Every single computer went blank, and an alarm started going off. {{It Got Worse}}. One of the workers switched on the intercom and said in a far too panicky voice, "There is no need to evacuate. Please remain calm. There is no need to evacuate. Please remain calm." Repeated over and over again, until, "There is no need to evacuate. [[KilledMidSentence Please remain]]-" This troper couldn't get out fast enough. * One night this troper (KurtmanJP) was lying in bed and he heard footsteps directly out his window. Keep in mind, his window is on the second story of a house and the footsteps sounded like they were on a hardwood floor. It almost sounded like they were pacing and stop then start right up after a couple minutes. Also keep in mind, my family has NO hardwood floors and that this happened at 4:40 in the morning till 6:15. Sometimes the footsteps would even return in broad daylight. * When this troper was young, his mother and sister went off to run some errands and his dad went down the street to talk to a neighbor, all of this without telling me. That was a set up for this...I was about seven years old and I walked out into my house to find the place empty and silent as a grave, when I stepped outside I could hear nothing (no wind,no birds,and no cars). To cap it off, the silence was finally broken...by a lone helicopter that buzzed shockingly low by my house. I was 7, and as far as I knew the world had ended. ** Similarly, this troper's parents are both ER doctors, and would occasionally be called in for emergencies in the middle of the night. More than once as a young child, this troper woke to find the house completely deserted (except for her sister, who didn't count). It also didn't help that it was a fairly large house; sometimes her parents were just tucked away in the library or the TV room, and sometimes they were simply... gone. But you wouldn't know for certain until you searched every room in the house... * I grew up in a house with about two to four ghosts. There's something evil in the basement bedroom (I once saw the back half of something catlike and black disappearing through the bedroom wall into the next room as I came in, and the room gives off really bad vibes). I've seen a man in 19th-century clothing go down the basement stairs at least three times, and I think he may have passed me once while I was sitting on the stairs. My young cousins claimed to see a ghost on the back patio while they were over after dark once and I have heard tapping and scratching noises at the doors and windows that adjoin the patio. There's also something that wants to come in at the front door. The dog, every so often, will race up to the door barking her hysterical someone-rang-the-doorbell bark when there's nothing out there and it's well after dark. My room shares walls with the front hall and the outer wall, and when my bed was in that corner I used to have terrible nightmares about not being in time to keep someone else from letting an evil woman into the house. Once or twice I've heard people talking in another room when I was home alone or the only one awake (something even asked me a direct question on one occasion). The scariest thing, about it, though, is the incredible feeling of being watched by something unfriendly when I'm alone there after dark.

Nothing happens, there's just this overwhelmingly evil feeling about the place. And it's actually mellowed a little with time; I remember coming home from school a few times and having to wait in the yard until someone else got back because I just couldn't stand to be alone in the house. My parents still live there. It's been a long time since I've actually seen anything there, but to this day I cannot stay alone at their house overnight. ** Speaking of spookyhouse, I've been house/pet-sitting there the last couple weeks. Absolutely nothing happened, not even the uh-oh feeling I normally get when I'm there after dark. The dog developed the habit of running up to the door in from the garage in the middle of the night and lying there alert and waggy like she does when someone is about to come in through that door, but I'm not convinced she wasn't just pretending/hoping/had dreamed Mom and Dad were coming home. Then last night she woke me up around three in the morning doing her soft, muttering woof she makes when she sees something outside she wants to bark at. When I got up, she started doing her "oh boy, people are here!" bouncing and yapping routine. The front door had been ajar when I came in from playing with her in the yard earlier in the day, but I didn't think much of it, since I might have left it that way one of the times I went in or out. And as the night went on, it seemed increasingly unlikely that someone would come in when the house was empty and then hide for six or seven hours before they did anything. But then I heard some thumping and clanking in the guest bathroom, which has been out of the commission for years. There's an enormous hole in the wall of the bathtub/shower, the tub itself is full of construction junk, and there's no water to it. So it wasn't the pipes. What it sounded like was something moving around in the tub. I ended up putting on my sneakers and grabbing my keys so that I could run out to my car and get away if I needed to, and walking around with my phone in hand, wondering if "my dog is acting like there's someone in the house and I hear noises" was reason enough to call the police. Of course there wasn't anything there or in any of the closets in the adjacent rooms. And the stuff in the bathtub doesn't even look to have been touched. I still don't know what I heard last night. * Englewood Reserve in Englewood Ohio (a little north of Dayton) is built partly over property that used to belong to a pioneer family named Patty back around 1810. One of its main attractions is a waterfall named Patty Falls, and part of the park road follows "Patty's Road," a stretch of the original National Road. There's also the Pattys' old homestead nearby, though all that's left of it is the remains of the springhouse and a local legend about one of their daughters being hanged from a tree nearby. The real hanging tree--if such a thing actually happened--is probably long gone, since none of the trees near the springhouse are old enough to fit the bill. But it's still a really evil spot. Being more curious than wise, I went exploring alone there after I first heard the stories. Nothing leapt out at me, but there was a really ominous feeling about the place, as if something really bad would happen if I didn't leave soon. I took a few pictures, but I still felt very uneasy and unsafe until I deleted them from my camera and my computer. A few months later I started to wonder if it had all been in my head. After all, I'd started to go "oh

no, this is so spooky!" when I took the wrong path off the road and ended up in the clearing where park maintenance dump the grass cuttings and chopped-up fallen trees before I found the actual Patty homestead. I thought the old springhouse would look really pretty in the three or four inches of snow that had just fallen, and I wasn't going to let any old ghost push ''me'' around. So I went back not long after that, and oh boy. Bad idea. Nothing actually ''happened'' but the same ominous feeling was a hundred times worse. What made it really weird was that apparently there'd been a camp-out or a program there (yeah, in the winter. I don't even know), because the trashcan at the side of the road was overflowing with garbage that looked like it was from a party or something. The path goes past the springhouse and then under the branches of a large tree as it goes into the woods beyond. As I got near the house, I suddenly had the feeling of being followed. I started to go up to the tree, but after the branches started jiggling pretty violently without a wind, I thought I ought to go. I turned back, walked a little ways, and paused for a minute. I don't even remember why I stopped. But in that moment, I distinctly heard a crunch like a footstep right behind me. When I turned around, there was a baggie of those rainbow-colored Goldfish crackers in the snow behind me. It had not been there when I went by the first time. I booked it out of there at that point and I haven't been back, since it just seems like asking for trouble. ** Also, while hiking along a river path in the same park years ago, I distinctly heard the sounds of someone jogging--the same kind of breathing and running footsteps--and had a sensation of someone coming up fast behind me. I stopped on the path, stepped to the side, and even started to apologize because it sounded so real, but there wasn't anyone there when I turned around. I've since heard stories of people seeing a "zombie girl" who just stared straight ahead of her and didn't answer when they tried to talk to her and who vanished after a few moments on that same path. The girl or girls allegedly hanged at the Pattys' house are also still supposed to roam the park. I don't go there by myself anymore. * I used to have two cats. I now have one. The other passed away a few months ago at the age of twenty. The older cat was deaf as a stone his last few years and would wander around at night screaming at the top of his lungs until someone came to shut him up. The younger one has always wandered around calling for people when he gets lonely late at night, though it's more of a "Meow? Meow?" than the old bastard's "MWAAAIIIIAAOOOWWHHH!" Lately, though, there have been a few nights when Iheard a cat calling in one room and gone to look for the live kitty, only to find nothing there or have him wander in from someplace else. Also once or twice I've felt something hop up on the bed and settle down, only find nothing there when I turned on the light to make sure the cat wouldn't get kicked if I turned over (the younger cat, who was never cuddly, has taken to sleeping in the exact same spot and position on my bed as the older one did, which also creeps me out a little). ** I have a similar story. When I was growing up, my family had two cats who were born a year before me. They both had orange-and-white fur. One cat died when I was 11, the other when I was 13. In the years

since then I have too frequently been in my basement on my computer and glance to the side and see something that looks like an orangeand-white cat dash across the room. ** Im pretty sure they take up the same spot because it seems like the most cat friendly spot because it smells like cat. * This troper's friend lives in a house that is connected to the college campus by a bike path going through the woods. The bike path has no lights. At all. A group of us were having fun on campus at night and walked back to his house at around 2AM. I could barely see the trees on the side of the road, not to mention that our college is one of the most dangerous campuses in the country. Absolutely nothing happened, but it was the most terrifying experience of my life. * ThisTroper's dad left the house unlocked for the five minutes he went to pick her up. He then dropped her off at the house and joked "Maybe I should check to see if anyone snuck in there while it was unlocked. Nah!" before driving off. I didn't feel at ease for the rest of the day, even after I'd checked all the rooms carrying some pepper spray. ** This troper had a similar thought at work the other day. I'd left the store for two minutes to talk to the owner of the shop next door. As soon as I came back in, it occurred to me that anyone could have come in and hidden in the back while I was next door. It wasn't until after I'd checked all the dark corners that I could relax. ** I've had that happen before. A few months ago I was home alone when I heard a weird noise. In a few moments I was in the kitchen with a large knife in each hand. It was nothing, but it freaked me out. *** Also, another time I heard my dog climbing into the tub, which she does when she's scared. I went into the other room, grabbed my shotgun, and searched the house. Again, nothing, so I wonder why the dog got scared. *** Did ''you'' get scared? Probably the same reason. * This Troper lives in a house with a black cat with a nasty habit of laying down in doorways. Nothing quite as scary as having your foot come down on warm flesh that wasn't there a minute ago. **** Oh, yes. A lot of times [[Tropers/{{Animenutcase}} this troper's]] Lhasa Apso got stepped on could be prevented if he didn't insist on lying on the floor in the dark. * [[TheNoun This Troper]] occasionally does babysitting for people. A few months ago, when she was taking care of a two year old kid named Joshua while his parents were out for the night, she had just put the kid to bed and sat on the couch when she heard a loud crash and the sound of breaking glass. She ran to Josh's room to make sure he was OK, then spent the next half-hour checking every window in the house and looking in every place that could be used for hiding while carrying a frying pan around. She even went out to the patio, where she found the patio table knocked over and smashed. She spent the next two hours in Joshua's bedroom, still holding the frying pan until the kid's parents arrived. While nothing bad ever happened, this was one of the most terrifying nights in this troper's life. ** And now this troper has had a repeat incident. This time she was taking care of seven-year-old twins Roberta and Randy, and decided that she's just call for pizza rather than kill herself cooking for

them (yeah, this troper realizes she is lazy). Ten minutes after she calls, she hears a loud bang on the door, and assumed it was the pizza guy. She opened the door, only to discover no one was there. She ended up answering the door with a bit less readily when the pizza guy actually did arrive. * This troper, because she has trouble sleeping, used to go for walks in the nearby woods when it was quite early in the morning. When it was the summer and everyone was walking their dogs, that's fine, but when it's grey and dark and there's not a sound to be heard except for trees making creaking noises? That's fricking terrifying. * This troper will be home alone at 11:00 at night. He will be in his room. The door will be closed. All the windows in the house will be closed. All of a sudden the door will push itself open. ''Push. Itself. Open.'' After that happens, he will then shove as much stuff in front of his door and wait until someone comes home before he goes to bed. Since the windows are closed, there is no way it could be a gust of wind. And this has happened too many times to count. ** Not to make light of your weird experience, but have you considered that it might be your house settling? Changes in temperature at night can change the shape of the house enough to make loud knocking and thumping noises, and to cause doors not to shut, or to open spontaneously. ** I lived in single in a dorm where that happened. It was pretty well accepted by everyone in the building that we had a ghost named Flick. My closet and room doors would burst open even when they were locked. Strangely enough, after I told the ghost that I didn't care what it did with the closet but I'd like it to please leave the door alone when I was out or asleep since I had a lot of expensive stuff I didn't want stolen, the closets burst open all the time but the front door pretty much stayed closed. Except for the time I locked myself out and the door was standing open when I came back from trying to find the RA to let me in. ** There's a section of my parents' house that does that, too, although we know why. It's worst when my bedroom window and the window in my parents' bedroom are both open, because the breeze ''will'' slam both doors very, very loudly. However, it does it even with the windows closed; the change in air pressure whenever the heating or air conditioning comes on pushes the doors and has provided me with a lot of nervous moments when I'm alone there. * [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Ridges The Ridges]] at Ohio University in southeastern Ohio. Even though this troper maintains that 99.9999999999999998% of the "something ''is'' here and oh shit is it scary" stories about the Ridges are either blatant lies or have more to do with the fact that the people reporting them are drunk/high/bored college kids looking for a scare than with anything supernatural, the place has an incredibly eerie, weird, sad atmosphere. I went up there a few times while I was going to OU to take photos on the grounds since it really is a pretty place. Nothing ever happened, but I was never comfortable being within a hundred yards of the old TB ward or on the grounds later than an hour or so before sunset at all. * This troper is taking a Color Theory class that goes from 6:00 PM to

9:20 PM. The class is in a room that this troper has had classes in before, so it's not like it's the room that's scary or anything. But for some reason, whenever this troper goes to the sink to clean out her brushes and get new water, shadows will pass across the light behind her and the overwhelming sense that someone is approaching from behind her. The first few times it happened, she moved over to give whoever it was room to use the sink as well and turned to look over her shoulder. No one in the class was moving, no one ever was when she would look back. Now she just tries to ignore it; easier said than done let me tell you. * This troper's friend suffered this for ''a full month'' after moving into his first apartment. * This troper's house is a lot emptier now than it usually is. I get this all the time. It helps that I'm not terribly observant, so people can announce they're leaving the house, and go, and I'll be none the wiser. I've also got a very low tolerance for screamer-style horror pop-ups. Now, sometimes, I get the overriding feeling that something will pop up in a window, or I'll turn around and there'll be ''something'' there. For no reason. It'll just be there. This happens a lot with windows, stairwells, corners-- and some times, for no good reason at all. I can't walk past our fireplace now, because I have this creepy feeling I'll turn and there'll be a severed head in the grate. ** Dude, this troper totally has the same thing. I can't have the blinds open at night and walking past the side door which has no curtains at night...* shivers* The scary thing is...one time there actually WOULD have been someone there if I'd gone-some dumbass kid had walked by it to go steal a flashlight(yeah, just a $1 flashlight for some reason) from our garage. ** Holy shit, are you both clones of me or something? ** This troper feels your pain. When she's on the computer at night... she'll get the feeling theres something behind her. MOMMY!!!! * It's a comparatively mundane use for DavidLynch, but [[MikeK this troper]] has been watching through TwinPeaks, and you know that recurring shot of the stairway leading up to the short darkened hallway over to Laura Palmer's room? He's now actively relieved his house doesn't even ''have'' an upstairs to have to walk up or even just by in the middle of the night. There ''is'' a frequently dark basement down a long flight of stairs that starts off with a corner you can't see around until you get down there, but somehow it's not the same thing (maybe the bin overflowing with old emptied beer cans immediately at the bottom adds NightmareRetardant somehow?). Oh, and the effect in general is probably also the reason that, as a child, he was creeped out by a painting in his parents' room that was just an empty-looking house surrounded by dead trees. * This troper's scariest experience at school was walking through the basement of her university campus alone at 1am. No one in the open classrooms, no one else walking the halls and the feeling that someone either was there or should be there. Needless to say she ran right quick out of that place! * Just a couple days ago this troper was downstairs and it was storming outside. She went upstairs to get a glass of something to

drink having laughed at Video on Trial. When she came back the channel had changed on its own. Made scarier by the fact that she was the only one awake and she doesn't know if it was just to do with the storm or something else... * When this troper was eight or nine she attended summer camp on a very old private school's grounds. One of the buildings was supposedly haunted, so our counsellor decided a fun thing to do would be to ''tape the building's basement for a night and make us watch it''. This troper ''still'' has nightmares... ** In 6th grade I spent 3 days at a camp (it was an school trip). And what camping trip would be complete without stories by the fire? Unfortunately we had a bunch of sadistic bastards as counselers, so they told the story of "Willie", an escaped psycho murderer who lived in the woods near the camp. No one used the bathroom the whole night for fear of getting attacked by the killer. The next day I had to do the scavenger hunt, which, since the counselers were sadistic assholes, followed a path into the middle of the woods... you know, the ones with the psycho killer in them. Obviously I didn't die, but there were 3 of us in the group, all scared of "Willie". *** Waaaiiiiiit. This story sounds... familiar. Was the guy's full name Willie Martin? Because if that's the story, this troper was with you, and you forgot to mention that abandoned sweatshirt with the camp's logo that we found lying in the woods. * In Jamaica, we have the Rose Hall Great House, which was home to Annie Palmer, a supposed British husband-killing voodoo witch. It's [[strike:practically]] a mansion. Only one person tried to live there after Annie. It wasn't the mythology, the fact that Palmer is buried in the backyard, or the creepy-ass painting with a lady in a red dress whose eyes follow you that made him leave. It was a disappearing tea set. That reappeared in the bedroom and crashed to the floor. Furthermore, when this troper went on a tour of the house, this kid from another group jumped on Annie's bed. His group's van broke down. * It was late at evening (and already dark) and this troper was waiting for his relative at the train station. It's quiet, lights are dim and the train was late. Then, suddenly an ice cream truck jingle of all things starts playing around the area. Needless to say, the situation became much more eerie... * This Troper used to work the graveyard shift at a newspaper press room in order to get money for his first car. In the central valley of California, it can get VERY foggy. So foggy, in fact, that it's entirely possible to be walking home at three in the morning in a thick grey haze that obscures one's own feet, and muffles any sounds, leaving one to navigate by the changing color of the fog caused by the traffic lights, and to wonder what might be lurking less than five feet away... If there's even anything that exists any more at all. * This troper has several. Since this troper moved house he has had to walk down a now closed down road, which has now been half converted to a cycle path, with two huge farmers fields eitherside. The area that is a full cycle path has a fair bit of trees and bushes on both sides, so much to prevent the light from the streetlights from reaching the ground. During the summer the council had decided to turn off all the strretlights for that road, causing me to borrow a powerful torch

(nicknamed the sun) from one of his friends until the lights are turned back on. The worse part is having to run the gauntlet, then realise that something big has been following you and not being able to see it, especially after a previous experience near there. The first week after the move, me and a few friends decided to go on a "death mooch". We were all carrying industrial flashlights, and just as we reached an abandoned water facility, my torch cuts out. As we are all very genre savvy, we all said that that was how horror movies start and how we should turn back. Through our own stupidity we go on further until we see a hunched over figure run through the gaps in the fence into the bushes. We turned and ran as fast as the wind, but then as we passed another big gap in the fence, something BIG barrels out of the gap behind us. We ran even faster, until reaching the safety of the metal gate closest to my house, it still kept coming closer, but stopped at a cycle path sign, but i swear whatever it was, it jumped, and it jumped far too far and high to be human. ** Another much earlier one happened whilst me and a group of friends were walking around the town, when we heard crying, and a strange tinkling sound, almost like an ice cream truck, but so much worse. And the worst part was the sound followed us, everywhere. Needless to say this troper is now terrified of dark paths, disembodied crying and unexplainable noises. * This troper just suddenly realized he hasn't heard any noises apart from the hum of the computer for a long time now. ** That's why I always have my TV on when I'm on the computer. ** I was creeped out when you brought that to my attention, so I turned on some music. *** I was too scared to walk across to my radio and turn it on. But as soon as I pressed the button, I was fine. {{Psychonauts}} Soundtrack Song 13: ''Under the Cover of Darkness'' ARGH, that makes it twice as bad now! ** This troper always has some music playing for this very reason. *** But if you do that, how are you supposed to hear the guy that's approaching you from behind right now? **** [[AtomicFBomb FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUCK.]] * This troper went to the art museum once for a school project. She arrived exactly as it opened, and for half an hour was literally the only person in the entire museum. She took note of how creepy this was. As she was walking into a room on the third floor, she heard footsteps. Cue screaming. Turned out that a few other people had arrived by this time. Awkward. * This troper lives in a house that's bigger than necessary and often takes showers while being the only one in the house. Add visions of ''Psycho'' and stir. He has heard things that turned out to be nothings and has even swiped the curtain open and closed, expecting something to WHAM him upon it's reopening.. * These moments are precicely the reason this troper tends to carry around heavy metal flashlights at night ** The same for me, except I have "The Hammer of Thor!!!" (which is a 1 lb weight with a string looped through a hole in it, the name is ironic). * This troper as an odd phobia... of content advisory messages.

Particularly if it is with no music, white text on a black background, and read sternly. The worst part is the two seconds or so of silence that follows. The worst is when it warns people with a "[[{{eversion}} nervous disposition.]]" ** It could also probably have much to do with how the text slowly fades away, which now that [[TedAsanto I]]'ve mentioned it, seems rather creepy. I've seen some film with titles that exhibit this kind of element of fear, owing to an always black background with text colors (white, red, green or blue) that stand out of the black background and this might extend to outside movie titles. Favorite mention goes to ''AreYouAfraidOfTheDark?'''s title, which is understandably creepy, even in the intro itself. But special mention goes to a ''Christmas-themed'' budget film named ''[[http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1800318602/details Dear Santa]]'' of all things, whose title is written with red and green ink blobs in a way hippies would graffiti on walls but with a more three-dimensional appearance, winding up looking more like ''blood blots'' over nothingness (the link does not show the title in a way as mentioned, unfortunately. It looked more like [[http://www.uafortsmith.edu/attach/News/files/2258.jpg this]].). * This troper browses TVTropes late at night. My internet connection is very bad, and my computer is in the basement. It's two in the morning, all the lights are off, I click the link to NothingIsScarier ... and get a blank white page. I couldn't sleep that night. * This troper has a HUGE case of this: She already spooks quite easily and gets nervous at the slightest hint of scariness, but her apartment in particular is horrible for her nerves. A tendency for her maternal family to see ghosts, an interest in the paranormal, insomnia, and a bedroom with a ''sliding glass door''? You've got ParanoiaFuel. The fact that there's a solid 6-foot fence around the patio to keep intruders out is actually making it worse. Why? Because that makes it extremely hard to tell if sudden light at 11PM is from a late-parking car... or someone's ''flashlight''. * I had a couple of instances of this when I was out on vacation in San Fransico. My parental units had decided they would indulge one of my greatest ghost story fantasies and take me to the Winchester Mystery Mansion. My parents and brother were genrally bored with the place, and I was having the time of my life, but when we all left, we all agreed on one thing. There was something terrribly off about the house. I didn't see, hear or sense anything that would register in my mind as a ghost, but I definitely felt like someone or something was in that building and it was watching everything. Another instance was when we went to Alcatraz for a night tour. I had always heard about how bleak and haunted the prison was, so I expected there'd be something "off" about the structure too. Like with the Winchester Mansion, I had no signifigant experience other than the weather being particularly helpful in completing the prison's "never gonna get out" image, but I do remember being distinctly creeped out by the isolation cells. They were cold and dark and my imagination was working overtime when I went into one of them so my dad could take a photo of me. These aren't true examples of "nothing is scarier", I suppose, but they're close enough for me.

* This troper has never had a real problem with hostile or not hostile ghosts, as he has faith in his deity to smite 'em if the need arises, but his house is ''very'' creaky (It's settled almost a foot in one corner), and he tends to stay up till 3:00AM watching marathons of Law and Order SVU. Queue massive freakouts whenever anything creaks. * This (german) troper noticed that dedicated shopping districts (with pedestrian zones) are surprisingly creepy when you go there very late at night/early in the morning (4 a.m. or so), when there is absolutely ''no one'' there. I mean...you know the place. You've been there like a hundred times. It's a place of buzzing activity, bright daylight, welcoming shops, people everywhere, and that's exactly how you've always experienced it, how it "should be"...except now it's ''not''. Absolutely nothing happens or moves. It's totally dark except for some scattered street lanterns. The shops you know so well are all closed, barred, have their shutters or heavy gratings down...and boy, is it SILENT. You're so used to this place being just...loud and noisy and active all the time, and now? NOW you're desperately trying to figure out if that "echo" of your own fricking footsteps is even actually this...or maybe ''someone following you''?!? Uh, it feels pretty much like being in an actual DarkWorld or something. For bonus points, go there when it's foggy. After playing/watching SilentHill. * This troper once had a hornet in the house. He opened the window to let it out, and then didn't see it again, and assumed it flew out. A couple of nights later, he's on the computer, and hears this loud buzzing sound. After a while of wondering what it was, he looks up, and sees the hornet is inside a bag not two feet away, at which point he leaps back several feet. * Take any Horror game. Any game at all. Turn the lights off, mute the sound, and play. Trust me, this troper was pissing himself with fear while playing Manhunt until he played it with the sound on. * This Troper has a few. First one happened a few nights ago. A policeman came to the door stating that there had been a burglary a few doors down and we should keep an eye out. Troper's mum then goes out for the evening and this troper has the house all to himself. After an uneventful evening Troper retires to bed with a book. As he reads he hears a funny sound that sounds like footsteps trying to be quiet. Fearing the worst, Troper puts on a dressing gown and heads downstairs. All goes quiet the second he opens the bedroom door. House is empty, but doesn't stop Troper lieing in bed all night with his eyes wide open. ** Second incident happened a few years ago. Troper was sitting in his room with the door closed when there were three knocks on the door. Thinking it's his mother, Troper answers bedroom door to find no one there. A quick check on his mum shows she's asleep and couldn't be responsible. Mother says that it was just objects falling over, but objects falling in perfect rhythm against my door? No chance. * [[Tropers/{{JET73L}} This troper]] is ''very'' familiar with NothingIsScarier. The worst offenders are glass surfaces (a window with nothing but shadow on the other side? A mirror where you can see ''just'' enough that it looks like there is space where there should be a wall, but not enough to look around the "room"? Reading about the TwilightZone or TheOuterLimits episode on [[TVTropesWillRuinYourLife

TV Tropes]] with the... pig, black, female, with a specific adjective [I ''hate'' [[SpeakOfTheDevil even thinking its name]]] doesn't help), particularly the front door window (ten inches high, four inches across with wooden bars on, just enough for some''thing'' to look through) and the back screen door (which tends to open on its own when the troper' sister forgets to block it after returning from school). Television sets are bad too, the CRT kind where the glass screen reflects ''just'' enough to not see anything useful. "Ghost" stories include seeing what appears to be the tail end of a grey tabby cat, only to see the ''actual'' tabby walk out from behind something on the other side of the room (We have a grey tabby and a black-white-andbright-tan calico, and haven't had a cat die while we lived here. Cats staring at "nothing" territorially can also be unnerving), and someone or something humanoid walking out of the boiler room in what would eventually become the bedroom of this troper without opening the door, noticing him, and ceasing to have been there (it had no particular sense of malevolence, just a wrongness that the troper's dad said was probably what the troper calls a [[SomebodyElsesProblem "Don't See Me spell"]]). Since, the troper usually feels a strong (observantly curious) watchfulness from that direction, which is scarier than if it was visible because as it is, the watchfulness could be anywhere from the boiler room to several inches behind, suddenly become visible, or (worst of all) be ''something else'', which wouldn't mind [[MindRape Mind Raping]] the troper [[ForTheEvulz For The Lulz]] if it got bored of watching ([[SCPFoundation the Joker]] is a common "but it could be ____" image). Strangely enough, the effect stacks, because it's far scarier when the watchfulness goes away than when it is there (though it's perfectly fine when it's not there in the first place). * One time in bed at 11:00 or so at night, I hear an angry hiss from my cat, followed by her growling. I come downstairs to see what happened and maybe calm her down, and I find her growling out the back door, which is covered in windows. There was ''nothing'' visible out there. She would ''not'' stop growling as if there was something out there. ...This happened to be the day that I started the [[{{HighOctaneNightmareFuel}} Meat]] [[{{Psychonauts}} Circus]]. Much sleeplessness ensued. * This troper has a primal, intense aversion to anything zombie related (finding the concept itself [[{{squick}} gross]] and horrifying). It also plays bad tricks on her imagination. At least twice I've had vivid, graphic, pee-your-pants-wake-up-praying nightmares about them. But I never see a zombie. Nothing ever happens. I just know that I am in an alternate universe where it WILL happen. (movie cut to fleeing people.) Any minute now, they will round the corner (cut to zombies) and my world (cut to blood), my sanity (cut to carnage), all I love (cut to death), will cease to be. * This troper wanted to read a chillingly scary story, as she rarely finds any. She read the story about the White Death on ScaryforKids.com. It was fairly late,about 11:00 pm, and the rest of her family was asleep. She goes into the eerily lit kitchen, already beginning to get scared when she hears knocking from the inside of the walls. She had to contain herself from screaming. ** See above; that's about when the ambient temperature has changed

significantly and a structure will reshape accordingly. * This troper was the only one awake in the house at 2 am when the smoke alarm went off for no reason whatsoever. She checked everywhere but there was nothing which could have caused it to do so. It went off twice this way before stopping just as inexplicably as it started. This troper could not sleep afterwards. ** Check the batteries on your central unit, if they're connected. Sometimes a false alarm is an indication that your system is going to shut down. * One night when this troper and friends were hanging out somewhere rumored to be haunted (there's a long, extremely scary story with people claiming they have encountered ghosts there) and anyway, it was a place we were familiar with and had even slept at, but then suddenly banging noises are heard through the door... this troper was one of the only one GenreSavvy enough to know that it's best to leave the banging alone. So anyway, there's banging, and they go outside, and find banging coming from an old abandoned locked shed. They call out to the shed, "is anyone there?" And then? Dead silence. This troper could hear everything from inside. In that same building, several people have said they've heard knocking and voices. But if there is something truly there, whatever it may be, seems friendly enough... doesn't make me not pee my pants at night thinking about it though... I mean, there's a dark room without any lights and a lot of random stuff you could fall over, completely closed in, no lights or anything that people have had to go in alone and it's rumored things have been heard in there... still kind of scary the first time, you know? I've gotten pretty comfortable there though, if something were to happen it would've happened. I like thinking it's haunted, actually... ** Also, another time: playing... I can't even type it, the game that says on the box you "can communicate with spirits" or something. Freaking terrifying. I feel unnaturally pulled towards all things supernatural, which scares me even more. Anyway, playing that game, in the mostly dark, where everything is silent.... wow. Just... wow. This troper asked for a name, but has always been too afraid to google it... for fear of it being real... or for fear of it being fake? I'd prefer to never know. *** Ouija board. Those are called ouija boards. *** [[CuriosityKilledTheCast What]] [[ApathyKilledTheCat was]] [[ElephantsChild the]] [[SchmuckBait name]]? * This troper once heard some woman crying shortly after she got in bed. I stayed still waiting to hear the crying again. When I did, I turned on my bathroom light and opened my door expecting it to be my mother. Thing is, I heard her snoring as soon as I opened the door, so it couldn't have been her. I looked out my window to see if anyone was outside; nobody was there. * This troper has a horrible fear of bees, hornets and all the other yellow, buzzy, stingy insects. His great grandfather grows delicious little green grapes every summer, and always sends him a package of them because said grandfather is awesome. So troper is happy, gets a package, opens it up and, as was probably obvious, BEE IN MY GRAAAAPES. He is no longer capable of opening a bag of grapes without extreme caution and terror.

** same here. I feel most uneasy outside in the summertime when there is no wind and it's not too hot or too cold, or the two weeks in the spring when blossoms are in full bloom. during that time, I most do my outdoors exercises and tasks at dusk, when the bees and such are asleep. sure enough, when I have to be outside during those times, I jump at every twitch and bolt everytime I hear a buzz. ** On the supernatural end of things, both averted and played unfortunately straight. This troper believes in ghosts, and hears noises he cannot identify rather often...so often, in fact, he no longer pays any attention to them whatsoever. But if you turn off all the lights in the house, and walk towards the back of it, through a tiny little hallway...the feeling there is something behind you that should not be there is hard to shake. Made worse by the fact that assorted digital clocks, [=VCRs=] and so on provide some lighting everywhere else; the hallway is the only part of the house that is pitch black. * How to create instant horror. Take a reassuring statement, and add a single link and some italics. ** "Nothing is out there. Nothing is hiding in the shadows. ''[[ParanoiaFuel Nothing is coming to get you.]]''" * Someone links you a scary video on YouTube. Maybe it's music, maybe it's an excerpt from a horror movie, doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is that you know it's gonna be scary. You click it and it starts loading... and loading... ''[[NothingIsScarier and loading...]]'' You can press pause and then do something else, but if you decide to "play by the rules" and wait and stare at it until it finishes loading, no pausing... it does somewhat amplify the effect from the video itself. * The silence after a screaming match with a loved one. * Back when this troper was still a small child, and her paternal grandparents still had their old house, she never wanted to go into the bedroom in the very back. Although she can't remember what it was of anymore, there was this painting hanging up across from the bed that just terrified her for some reason. The one time she had to sleep there, she ended up giving up and fleeing to where her parents were sleeping. Nothing ever happened, but there was just this overbearing feeling of ''something'' back there that just wasn't quite right. Now that she thinks about it, there was always something kind of odd about that place, but this troper was always too oblivious to every really notice it anywhere but that room at the time. * [[{{Sen}} I]] can attest to the truth of the ''Rayman 2'' entry. First time I played through the Cave of Bad Dreams, I just rushed it as much as I could and kind of felt eerie when I thought I was being too slow. And there's also those buzzy black fly thingies. ARGH. * A variant: This troper is only truly scared in video games when he's fighting a foe that he knows is there, knows can kill him, but that he can't see. Espescially if they're invisible. ** ThisTroper used to be terrified of the zombies in Half Life 2's Ravenholm level, because they would sneak up on you from nowhere, and the fast zombies were even worse since they were hard to shoot. After playing through the game several times, learning all their spawn points, and learning how to kite them, he's only really scared of the

Antlion Guards, because they're like Tanks, they can run at least as fast as you, and they're almost too smart to be circlestrafed. ** This troper is terrified when playing horror games and he can hear something running towards him but can't see where it's coming from. It's utterly terrifying pointing your weapon (if you HAVE one) at the best guess and hoping your right while rushing footsteps get louder and louder. It's almost a relief when the monster appears (Unless it's behind you of course...) * [[ShapeshifterTheTroper This troper]] was browsing the RealLife section when she came across a link to the Wikipedia article about [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bloop the Bloop]], but, regardless of fear of the unknown, that wasn't the scary page. No, the scary page was [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julia_(unidentified_sound) the index]] on unexplained sounds, including a reference to "the Julia" with no description of the sound itself. ** God I hate that page. Damn Bloop. ** This troper found a copy of the Bloop at actual speed, made a poorly done Cthulhu montage and added in the parallels between the bloop's info and Cthulhu lore. here it is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bdDXh4Ap49A . * This troper was recently part of a sci-fi rp. About halfway through, something invaded the station. Whatever it was, the AI on board went completely haywire. Constantly warning us to evacuate "everywhere" and informing us that it had lost control of all systems with constant stuttering and interrupting itself was unsettling enough. What was worse was when... Well, "R-r-r-reccomend immediate evvvaaaaaacccevacuation of everywhere". There was a period of silence, then someone asked the AI a question. No response. That was the moment we knew we were going to die. * This Troper lives on a farm in the country side. Sounds peaceful, doesn't it? Now, imagine that during the summer, all the adults go to work and you are left home alone. Sounds less peaceful, huh? Now imagine that in order to get to your grandmother's house, you must walk past a shady group of woods with the sounds twigs snapping as animals go by. Imagine walking toward grandmother's house, having to go underneath a tunnel of trees that cover the road and are so thick, almost no light gets through. Starting to get a little worse, huh? Now just imagine you heard that a lion got loose in the nearby area...''And that if anything bad happened to you, no one would be around to help or even know you were in trouble!'' * This Troper's old house had the dining room separated from the main entrance to the house by a thin wall. In this wall was an archway so you could see the front door from the table. I used to swear that late at night there would always be something floating in the archway. It would be gone when I was close enough, only appearing at the edge of my vision. Other nights when I walked by the arch, I swear I would hear muffled laughter. I always would put it down to being tired but now I swear that there was something unwholesome in that room. * My friend recently got a house of her own, and she kept hearing footsteps coming from the attic, and doors slamming downstairs. One night she was woken by someone knocking on her bedroom door, and she searched the whole house and found nothing. A few months before I told

her a scary story about someone finding out that the previous owner of the house was still living there, up in the attic, eating their food and using their stuff while they were out or asleep. I stayed there one night and was really freaked out. * This troper falls victim to this trope very frequently, even in situations that just really wouldn't call for it. Oh, the memories of running away in terror just because the room I was in happened to be ''too'' quiet. * Probably doesnt help that alot of supposedly abandoned places are used for illegal activities like i found out that someone was murdered in the upper levels of a parking lot when i assumed it was an engine backfiring * There is some construction going on at this troper's school, and in order to dust from all of the construction from getting into the school, some of the windows in the school are covered by some sort of protective sheets. Some of these windows include those that belong to the bathroom. One day I walked into one of the bathrooms to go and the windows were '''pitch black'''. The lights were on, but you could see literally '''nothing''' outside. You have no idea how quickly I wanted to get out of there. * Once, when I was a little kid, I had just settled into bed. I was facing the wall and my back was to the rest of room. I hadn't even been there a minute when suddenly I heard a voice whisper directly into my ear with perfect clerity, ''"You want you out."'' I looked to see what had said just to see nothing. Cue sleepless night with the lights on. ** Then, about ten years later, something started throwing various items around the room (some of them landing on me on the bed) and banging things against the wall. I would turn the light on and '''nothing'''. Nothing was wrong...until I turned the light of again. One time, ''it began pulling my bedsheets off of me and then stopped when I turned the light on.'' Weird thing is when I let someone borrow the film PrettyWoman which I had in my room, the activity completely ceased permanently. It was returned, but I shelved it downstairs. Nothing else has ever happened in that room even after that. [[MindScrew The hell?]] I know it sounds like this totally made up as a TakeThat against Julia Roberts or Richard Gere, but it is not. I frankly don't understand, either. * RealLife example of the third variant! This troper was at a sleepover type event held at the local zoo. After dark, we went around with night vision binoculars to see the animals, as some of them were still out on exhibit for this specific purpose. When we got to the cat house, one girl who did not have the binoculars at the time went up to the window leading into the leopard's outside enclosure and peered in. After a few seconds, she jumped back screaming. The leopard was just inches away from the glass, with his mouth open and his teeth showing, but you couldn't see him until your face was also inches from the glass. * This troper has a video-game example: WorldOfWarcraft. To her, the scariest part of the game is not Northrend; it's not Duskwood; it's not even the Forsaken zones. It's Deadwind Pass. If you stray ''just'' off the road--say, to go fishing in the river at the bottom of the

ravine--it's completely quiet with no music, there are no enemies, and there is no color but gray. You keep expecting something to attack you, and maybe it would be less scary if something did. In the grand scheme of fight-or-flight, this troper bares her teeth and goes for the jugular--but if there's no jugular, she can't fully get hold of her fear. * [[{{Tropers/Andrusi}} This troper]] has had a computer (not always the same one, but there always is one) in his room for almost ten years. About two years ago, my then-current computer died, which turned out to be the reason I was suddenly so unsettled by my own bedroom--just the absence of that quiet hum made it so I couldn't sleep, and I had to set up an old computer to leave running all night while I ordered a new one and waited for it to ship. * This troper often had strange dreams, where he roamed his house at night and sighted black, shadow-like beings. Then, I "woke up". I try to move, only to find my body is paralyzed. My eyes move frantically and, by the a light from the window, I see that shadow again, glooming over me... Then I wake up. And there is another type of "dream", when this troper was falling asleep: It feels like jumping up and down in a elastic bed. Then something wakes me; it feels like I was floating and was just dropped flat on my bed. Recently, it was a different kind of dream, where I met two of my colleagues, playing with my umbrella. They end up hitting my stomach with the pointy end of it. I woke up in my bed, feeling as if someone had just hit my stomach with something. Also, when I was a child, I simply DREADED sleeping in my grandma's room with her. First, because she is a bitch and complains on everything. Second, because the room was nothing short of creepy in the dark; the ceiling, the dolls my cousin left in the room... Something about that room scares me to this day, because I just can't sleep in it. * A couple of months ago this troper was out shopping when she got a rather harrowing text message from her ex saying only the word "You". Literally seconds later, the phone's battery died. This wouldn't be so bad since accidentally hitting 'send' before finishing the message isn't an uncommon problem with certain cell phones. But this was a person who had [[{{Understatement}} a little bit]] of trouble accepting the fact that I was serious about the breakup, and wasn't exactly [[PsychopathicManchild mentally unstable]] either. Not to mention that one word can sound quite threatening. Luckily he didn't send any other messages after that, but... damn. * It was 4:33AM when I finished reading the main article. I'm in the corner of my decently-sized bedroom, no other lights around except the weird orange-yellow glow coming from the window (light pollution from the nearby city, which cant be seen because the laptop monitor is in my face and the stark white page washes everything else out. My internet connection is dead because an hour earlier my router crapped out, which it does often. The only noise is from the mister/humidifier in the center of my room. I managed to make it through all the examples here with no major shocks, and when I get to the end I see the ellipses after the examples and smile. Clearly someone was clever enough to end the article on the same note that the content was on. I see the ellipses drop to two dots, then one, and a mass of blank text.

Amused, I absentmindedly highlight the space underneath, I still don't know why. And it startled the crap out of me. Suddenly, and only then, the nothing around me was -that- much scarier. I immediately turned the computer off so I could see the light pollution and the tiny bit of light from the hallway coming around my door, and went to sleep. * For one of my classes, I was assigned a three page (double spaced) paper on a serial killer, which as per my usual got put off until the night before. I ended up being the last one awake, and for a while I was doing well, until about eleven when I noticed the hallway behind me was dark and suddenly got terrified. My scary score that I have for writing had come up on my itunes. I listened to showtunes the rest of the night. * Five words: Mall of America after hours. * I have not so great hearing, so whenever I'm home alone i usually have music running just to avoid this trope. when i was younger i would get so scared during the night that i was literally debilitated and unable to move after everyone else went to sleep, we lived in a hundred year old house that settled nightly, and was haunted and inhabited by Wicca practitioners. the later two problems were taken care of by my mom, she had no tolerance whatsoever for stuff like that, especially when it threatened her kids so she told it to go (the ghost and the crap left by the previous owners). it did. and that was that, the house was still insanely creepy mostly because the back half was unheated, filled with junk, and never used. still an insane amount of noises came from the back, to this day i can't stand silence. * This Troper once had a really frightening experience driving down her suburb's roads on an extremely foggy day. The previous night, she had foolishly decided to watch a bunch of SilentHill LetsPlay videos. She had to get to school early for something and it was very foggy out. There was nobody else around because it was so early - no other cars, no people walking down the streets, nothing. I was just waiting for the tell-tale siren to go off, because it really did feel like Silent Hill, and it really did scare the shit out of me. * This troper used to live in Texas (Dallas to be precise), and his mom would grow roses next to his room. Unfortunately, this was during a time that the city was hit by a crime wave. Sometimes at night, when the wind blew, the roses would stratch the windows, but it did it in such a way that it sounded like someone was carving the window with a knife, and I would always think that someone was trying to break in and I would barely sleep from the thought of a burglar trying to steal my stuff or kidnap me. Needless to say, I was quite glad when I moved rooms. * In the spring of 2010, I attended a nine o'clock performance of the comic opera ''The Elixir of Love''. The production left me in good spirits, and I was still in a good mood when I walked out of the auditorium. My joy soon turned to fear when I stepped onto the sidewalk. Everyone had vanished. Not one other person crossed my path as I continued toward campus, treading on asphalt and grass in the middle of the starless night. I had no flashlight and no protection, and mused that this feeling was probably what SurvivalHorror protagonists felt constantly. I knew fear on that night.

* This troper has a mile and a half to walk home from school. One day, one of my friends who lives in the area told me that a girl my age had been raped on the route I take home. Coupled with this tropers phobia of dirty old men, you have a VERY long trip home. Anyway, it was getting dark, and I was walking along a deserted road I take to my house. It is silent apart from the wind and the hum of not one, but TWO police helcopters buzzing very nearby. Don't forgetthat this troper was alone, and is barely 5ft tall. Needless to say, this troper now gets the buss. * This trope has a cat that always comes for a cuddle before going to sleep at the foot of my bed. Occasionally she'll go stiff as a board mid-cuddle, her hackles will rise, and she ''always'' be staring at the ''same'' point in the air a few feet from my ceiling. Then she'll unfreeze, turn, and ''run the hell out my room''. This troper sleeps in a loft bed. The scary point in the air is just a bit more than an arm's distance from my pillow. I've never seen a thing, and believe me, I have looked. I've spent many long minutes staring at that point in the air, trying to figure out what my cat could have been seeing. Nothing. * Not too long ago I had sporadic bouts of sleep paralysis when waking. The first time this happened was ''the'' most terrifying experience I have ever had. I woke up normally and started to get up only to discover I couldn't move. At all. And only a few days earlier [[TemptingFate I had wondered what it must feel like to be completely paralyzed]]. I panicked, trying to thrash around and call out for help, but nothing would move, my mouth wouldn't open. I couldn't even make vocal noises. Now, I happened to be lying on my stomach like usual and facing towards the door. There is only about two feet of space between my bed and the back corner of my room behind me. I instantly became aware that there was...''something'' sitting there, in the corner behind me, just out of my peripheral vision. I could ''feel'' it there and I knew it was watching me, and I couldn't stop feeling like it was ''smiling at me''. With every ounce of strength I had, I screamed "In the name of Jesus Christ, GET OUT OF MY ROOM!" I immediately pulled myself up and spun around. Of course, there was nothing sitting in my corner. It wasn't until the third instance of paralysis that I actually looked it up and read that panic and even hallucinations of being observed are common symptoms. That did take the edge off and it's been months since my last paralysis...but I never had another panic attack like that first one, and I always found it interesting that I could speak and move only after calling out the name of Jesus. * I spent most of last summer at my grandma's house in Arizona. Because it's, ya know, in the middle of a desert, keeping the place cool is a pretty major concern. Due to the quirks of the A/C system and evaporative cooler and the location of the guest bedroom, to keep the room from being roasting hot at night I had to keep door onto the hall open and the window open a crack. Also, the curtains didn't keep out all the light from the neighbors' houses and my grandma feeds the local critters, so there's a lot of wildlife hanging around there. Oh,

and because she doesn't have internet at her house, I'd usually wind up loading a bunch of reading material and videos on my computer at the public library, then I'd go through it when we got home. HPLovecraft and MarbleHornets just before bed? Bad idea. HPLovecraft + MarbleHornets + long, thin cactus shadows + pitch dark doorway onto the hall + sound of a whole herd of javelinas moving through the underbrush right under my window? ''Worse idea''. * This troper sometimes hears voices when he is in his house alone, but, when he goes to see who it is, there is no one there. Funnily enough, it only occurs when he is on stuff he shouldn't be on, which has led him to believe that ghosts know what he is watching and can...see...him......typing......this.........[[OhCrap Oh,]] [[ParanoiaFuel holy]] [[PrecisionFStrike shit!]] ** Recently, same troper has become paranoid that, whenever he goes to close the curtains or glance in a mirror (or even turn around) in the dark, he will see a horrible monster appear out of nowhere. It has never happened, but, dammit, it always makes him nervous to even do those in case it does happen. The real irony is that he doesn't watch horror movies, so it is PrimalFear going completely mad for him. * This troper lives in a very old, creaky house. At night she is usually in the computer room, which only has one lamp. There's a little alcove in said room, where THERE IS NO LIGHT AT ALL. NONE. Just a dark shadow. Needless to say, this troper is often very scared to turn around. * This troper has three different instances. The first, which scared me the most was one day when this troper had the day of from school. So her mom comes home to have lunch with her and then leaves to go back to work and she's all alone. Then her mom calls her and says that there was a burglar by a park near her house and tells her to lock every door and window and if she hears a knock, to make as much noise as possible. So this troper naturally texts all her friends, turns on the tv, gets out her computer, and grabs a pair of scissors to throw. (i can throw them completely accurately) And she just sits there until her sisters get home and...knock on the door. Needless to say, my sister wasn't happy that I was poised to throw a pair of scissors at her. * Another story from this troper, but about her dad. When he was in college, he had an apartment and he lived alone in it. One night his fire alarm goes off, he gets up and checks around, but nothings burning so he checks the alarm and its fine. So he goes back to sleep. Like two hours later, it does it again and he does the same thing, but this time he takes the batteries out and puts them on the counter, goes back to sleep. A little while later it rings again! He went to stay with his friend, and the next morning, his neighbor told him that the police shot a guy in that room! * When I was reading this, I had to turn on Scrubs because it was terrifying me. Particularly the ones that say that they read it and realize how quiet it is... * Two more things are when cats stare at nothing. Always creeps me out when I'm petting them late at night. And it's always the same spot in the hallway...

** Last things is kind of dumb, but once again about smoke alarms. This troper has never liked the little flashing light on smoke alarms especially in the dark. It just gives me bad vibes. * The scariest experience of my life happened when I was three years old, and it was because of this trope. When I was very young, there were several rooms of the house where I was afraid of being left alone, one of them being the family room, which had one wall that was really just a sliding glass door that gave you a very good view of the back yard. At night, however, it was very difficult to see what was ''in'' the back yard. Now, we had a turntable, which was slightly outdated at the time, but we had some children's records my mother liked to put on for me. She'd put on a Charlotte Diamond album, and it made me feel better about being alone in the family room that night. Well, up until the song "Looking For Dracula" (which can be heard [[http://ilike.myspacecdn.com/play#Charlotte+Diamond:Looking+for+Dracu la:4783463:s48923762.12297284.21421181.0.2.214%2Cstd_55b0ec012c654a01a d777e2a0b2c1e38 here]]). It's a rhythmically-spoken story about [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin looking for Dracula]], and, towards the end, it sounds like sounds like she's in hysterics and almost crying. It's the last song on that side of the album, and, as I didn't know how to turn over a record and didn't know where my parents were to get them to do that for me, I couldn't chase the fear away with a cheerier song. It was the silence following the song that scared me so. I wanted to look into the darkness outside, but I was terrified of whatever sorts of things my imagination could have conjured up. I could have left the room, yes, but I didn't know where my parents were (and, even now, I ''still'' haven't been able to find out where they were), and the thought of wandering the house through empty rooms, most of which with lights off, in search of them was too much for me. It probably doesn't sound like anything bad to you, but, when you're three and full of irrational fears, it's absolutely terrifying. It was the scariest thing I've ever been through (especially when my childhood was full of things like that), and it's probably responsible for a good part of who I am today. * I've had a single instance of Sleep Paralysis, which appropriately enough happened after I saw ANightmareOnElmStreet for the first time. Woke up from a nightmare and could not move for several seconds, and when I could, everything was stiff and tingly like I had a whole-body charlie horse. Freaked me the hell out. But probably one of the scariest memories I have comes now when I think back on it. I was maybe twelve years old, lying in bed, staring at my clock's lit-up numbers. It was like 11:30 at night. I ''blink'', and the clock reads 3:15 in the morning. [[MindScrew There's a part of me that swears that something must have happened]], even if it was just me falling asleep and waking back up. * This troper went back to her old high school to participate in an alumni chorus concert. As she wandered down the empty hallways (it was evening, and summer besides), she almost expected [[{{Halo}} the Flood]] to jump out and attack! * While it may not compare to these other entries, this happens to me most of the time. I'll be coming back to my dorm, just about to unlock it, when I hear voices in my room--two or more people talking,

laughing. Now, I know that this door has been locked for several hours and my roommate is gone, but I can't help but freak out and wonder how someone got into my room. I unlock the door, step inside and....there's no one there and the TV's not on. And the voices have stopped. * This troper was up in the mountains doing some geological mapping on a recently-made logging road on a normal summer day when all of a sudden the light dimmed as a low-flying cloud came in. The air became heavy and damp, all the normal animal noises (from insects to birds) abruptly stopped and, most discontertainly, the wind suddenly died which meant you couldn't even hear the rustle of leaves. And then my compass, which I had just opened up to take a measuresment, started going wonky. I ''immediately'' unclipped the safety strap on the big bush knife I alweays carried in the field because I'd seen the movies and knew those little Grey bastards were going to get a fight...and then the wind picked up, the cloud cleared, the sounds were normal, and the magnetite vein I'd just walked over was clearly visible in the sunlight. * This troper's wife used to work in a rather old library. There is a large, empty community room on the top floor, and at closing time, she had to walk across the room and turn the lights off, then walk all the way back across to the main door some fifty feet away completely in the dark. She was always terrified of having to lock up because she didn't know what could be in the darkness. * Don't look from underneath the covers. If you feel something staring at you, ''good God'', whatever you do, '''''don't look out from underneath the covers!''''' At least underneath the covers, you can pretend they don't see you... * In college, this troper rented a house with a cold war era bomb shelter in the basement. None of the lights worked down there, but I used the space for home brewing. One night, I woke up to a loud crash below me. I went down to check it out. The furnace was off and the battery of my flashlight was nearly dead. Deep down, I knew that a beer bottle had exploded, but between the dim light and the eerie silence, I was on edge enough to go back upstairs and get my roommate's cricket bat for "protection". The adrenaline kept me up for awhile after that. * This Troper used to take a night class in college. On the way to and from this class, my dad would drive on this road that at one point, was surrounded by trees on either side, and beyond the thin wall of trees are cornfields. Whenever we went through it, it felt like some''thing'' was about to jump out in front of the car. Needless to say, fog did NOT help the situation. * This Troper went to a small asian restaurant for a meal afterschool. There weren't too many people there. After I ordered my food, I got bored and looked for the washroom. It was downstairs, so I went down the stairs and I end up in a small room, which had two doors and a mirror in between. One door lead to the men's washroom, and other to the women's washroom. It was also VERY quiet and dimly lit. I open up the men's washroom door, and it was pitch black inside. The door was also hard to open... I then decided that I didn't have to go to the washroom at that time.

* This trope is the reason why I am locked in my bedroom with all the lights on with my father's bayonet that he uses for Civil War reenactments. * Years ago, this troper was playing outside at a day-care center when there was word on an escaped convict in the area. One of the younger kids wanders off, one of the older, more responsible kids goes looking for him. Time passes, another older kid goes off to look, and another... as the remaining kids go into a downward spiral of paranoia, hiding in a patch of pine trees. They'd gone inside, and hadn't thought to bring word back. Though they never told us if the alert was real... * This troper once wandered around her school after classes out of curiosity. At first it was fine. Most of the corridors were familiar territory and the occasional teacher passed me by. Then I went into the "other" side of the school. My whole walk there was practically full of ParanoiaFuel. Dark corners, mysterious locked doors, the odd shattered window, dimly-lit hallways, and the strange way the corridors seem to tilt this way and that... * There's a window in my bathroom that's right next to the shower, and it's sort of opaqued so that nobody can really see you naked. At night, it's pitch black and you can't see a damn thing out of it, though thanks to the bathroom light, you can probably see IN it. Lately I've been having thoughts that something might come up to the window and scare the shit out of me (it doesn't help that I'm a Slenderfan). Thanks to this horrible paranoia, I've started to get up a half an hour early to take my showers in the morning, when there's at least enough light to see out. * This Troper was once so afraid due to this trope, that he decided to become the monster, as it were. I started stalking the town after dark dressed in black and camo, looking for people who were alone so I could induce paranoia by clearly being there but at the same time, being unseeable. By scaring others, I managed to alliviate my own fears (my logic was "if I'm the scariest thing around there's no reason for me to be scared myself."). I've since gotten therapy and no longer do this. * I was once in the kitchen around midnight, with the lights on. I was the only one awake, and there was not a sound anywhere, except for the wind gently blowing. As I walked back to the living room to get on the computer, I stopped by the back door. I looked outside. Except I didn't see outside. Not even the light from the kitchen shed any light on my backyard. I thought it was odd, sure, but I wasn't scared. Then my mind brought up all the scary things I had experienced, read, or watched, lately. It forced me to think. -->''What if there's something blocking the light.'' ** If it wasn't obvious, I got the hell out of there. * There's a cabin right next to the lake my house was built on that was built in 1919. My family uses it as a shed. When I was little, I went in to get the badminton stuff and SOMETHING TOUCHED ME. Like an icy cold finger tapped my shoulder. I couldn't go back in there for a month. The really wierd thing is, I've done some research on the house lately. All I can find is that it's previous owners were a family with a 10-year-old daughter. They probably moved out when she was 10 or

something, but I got the creeping suspicion that she'd drowned. It still gives me the chills. * This troper has always had a crippling fear of being alone, given that fact most of my school year ethier avoid or torment me and because I get up very early in the mornings - i get scared more easily than most think. Back in primary school, the Christmas Play would be held late at night during december. I remeber being frightened to hell of the school at night. The tall, cold stone walls that seemed to stretch on for miles. The pure dark atmosphere outside the massive windows. The almost inaudible voices of excited or tired parents in the dance hall. [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking And the fact I always had to wear]] [[PajamaCladHero my jammies]] [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking during the plays.]] What made it more frightening was that it seemed ''I was the only one who noticed any of it.'' When I was eight I told my teacher of said fears....she told me to stop overeacting and made me stay in the darkest area of the stage until my cue. What was worse was that I couldn't see my mom in the crowd so I thought I was there alone. ** Even now I can't stay up later than my sisters. 11 o clock at night? Parents are out? Tv bill payed? Mountains of movies? AWWWW YEEEAAAAHHH! What? Both sisters going to bed early? BED-TIME! Up early in morning? Snacks everywhere? Folks aren't up yet? Cartoons you couldn't get before? AWWWW YESSS! Ridiculously dark and quite with the occasional sound of pipes cooling down? BACK TO BED. * My siste's friend told me about "The Nothing", The Nothing is a monster that only exists in your mind, and it differs from person to person, so she said whenever you are looking down an empty hallway, the nothing is secretly there, making it scary. * I was home alone (my dog doesn't count) one day. It was a perfectly normal, sunny day like any other. I decided to take a break from whatever internet-based activity I was doing and look out at the back yard through the sliding glass door. And then I heard what sounded like a long, drawn out ''sigh'' from right behind me. Nobody else was in the room. Needless to say, I kept a heavy object by my side just in case anything needed to be bludgeoned until someone else came home. * The first time I was playing {{Portal}}, I thought the companion cube was going to start talking. Of course, there was only silence. (Eventually I thought I heard it talk...) * I'm pretty sure this goes in Troper Tales...A few years back, I was watching On Demand and noticed they had a selection of student films-films made by ''high-school'' students. One of them...[[NothingIsScarier Oh god.]] The short film followed a high school boy who was staying home alone one day--used a lot of shots of him just going about the day, no one else around...complete silence in the house...Then he gets a phonecall from a man who claims he can see the boy's future, and it will be a good one if he just follows these simple instructions. (The kid believed him because he got a fax from that man earlier that said '''"It looks like your mother's going to be late."''' Just then his mom called saying she wouldn't be home til ten at night.) At first nothing much happened; the kid just did simple things that seemed insignificant, then got calls saying he did great, his future was getting clearer now. "Now you're going to meet a man,

and I want you to help him, okay?" The kid later sees a man walking around on his lawn, in the middle of the night, and invites him inside. As he takes the man inside and directs him to the livig room, the kid takes his phone out to call the other man, saying he helped him, so now what? Silence...and then the voice got all nervous and said "You shouldn't have let him inside. ''I can't see your future anymore.''" And then hung up. The kid sets the phone down, sloooowly looks out into the hall and--Cut to black, with the director's voice saying "We're sorry. We were unable to think of a suitable ending. Please, everyone, use your imaginations." For some reason, ''that alone'' scared the everloving crap out of me. * {{Tropers/Anderling}} takes the underground to school every day. A couple of weeks back, the intercom said that due to an "accident" at station Alexander, there would be a delay. I live right near that station (I get off only two stops earlier), so I started wondering what had happened and [[GenreBlind decided to go and see]]. When I got there, there weren't any ambulances or police officers or whatever. There wasn't anyone there, either, despite it being the middle of the day and an important transfer point for the train and the schedule was still erratic so there wasn't going to be another carriage for half an hour. I ran and refused to go near the place for a few days. * This Troper reads this page and [[NothingIsScarier the main page]] in the night, 12 A.M and later, everyone else in the house asleep, all lights off including my bedroom light, sometimes mildly blowing wind and I live nearby a cemetery for war heroes. Cue scratching noises on the wall right behind me... * This troper once had a group of friends who would occasionally go wandering out at night. One of our favorite haunts was a little old cellar, quite large, the woman who owned it never seemed to be home. There were rumors of all sorts of hellish noises coming out of that cellar, people would disappear near there, and when we went there, all we saw was darkness. Inside, outside, the world seemed to become darker near that cellar. Now, me and my friends thought we were pretty brave, but when we went in there...yikes. Chains hung from the ceilings, the walls, and occasionally, we would hear something ''walking'', rattling with chains. A chill ran down our spines every step. Further and further in, the thing just plain became eldritch looking. There were odd drawings on the walls, and nobody was around. Nobody. And the walking whatever with the chains...ugh. When the rattling got closer and closer, we were on edge. We found something down there, a little red stone on the ground, and then there was a moaning sound from outta nowhere. More chain rattling. We ran for it. We never went that far in again. * After finding a room full of dirt in the basement, appropriately called [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin the dirt room]], my mother and I explored it. [[NightmareFuel There was no light in there, save for the flashlight my mom had.]] There was nothing in there, save for some rocks, some supplies for building, and...but [[ParanoiaFuel after months of watching Marble Hornets]], I kept jumping in and out of the door, just to make sure that, if anyone did come (not mentioning any [[TheSlenderManMythos names]]), I could get out easily.

---<<|TroperTales|>> [[NothingIsScarier ...]] [[ParanoiaFuel There's nothing behind you.]] [[color:beige:found you]]

NothingIsTheSameAnymore * Getting my first girlfriend. After 18 years of uncertainty I finally proved to myself and others that I have what it takes. * The antithesis of above: try getting cheated on. Imagine the backbone individual of your entire life suddenly becoming a stranger whom you can't trust. No matter how good you both had it, that is a wedge that takes a buttload of time and effort to remove, if it's even worth removing at all. * When this troper was in high school, I heard this a lot about college, mostly from the (completely inept) guidance counselor and a few of the young teachers. We always had to listen to how professors would never have any time to help us, notes would only be available if you actually went to class, tests/papers would be much harder with absolutely no leniency, our 'slacker' habits would have to change unless we wanted to fail classes and that no one in the administration would give a flying crap about our problems. Cue actually going to college and discovering that most of these statements are bald-faced lies. Yes, there are grains of truth to this, but none of them are hard and fast rules. Almost nothing changed when I went to college: I still write papers the night before they're due, the professors are legally required to have open office hours and notes are totally available online (depending on the professor). In my case, everything is the same, minus living in the dorms, eating shitty dining hall food and all the new people. ** [[GirlInGlasses This troper's]] life changed DRASTICALLY when she went to college. I am not friends with anyone I went to high school with now, except for two people, and went from being in a very, very conservative Christian environment to being at this huge, somewhat pretentious, very liberal university. I came out as lesbian, actually started enjoying dating, became interested in postmodernism, feminist theory, and existentialism, lost my religion, finally started being treated for my anxiety disorders, and discovered my {{Nakama}}. [[CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming And for the first time in my entire life, I FINALLY know how it feels to be happy.]] * [[@/TitoMosquito This troper]] felt this way after graduating high school. Also the start of the TurnOfTheMillennium. TV isn't the same anymore either, not as good as TheNineties shows. * After 24 and a half years, my parents have just recently moved out of their house. From [[{{Joisey}} New Jersey]] down south to [[DeepSouth North Carolina]]. I don't even remember the house they had

before that because I was too young. Although for a few years now I have been off on my own working the nine to five and building my own life, I still have the ever creeping feeling like I have no home to go back to. Still keep in tight touch with the family and that makes me feel much better though. * This Troper parted with his first girlfriend on (semi-) amicable terms, and hoped to get back together with her someday when he was more mature. Cue her dating another guy, then getting pregnant with his baby because he screwed up condom usage, and her deciding to keep the baby. Now I find myself in the unenviable position of having to tell her that I'm still in love with her, and can't spend time with her anymore. LoveHurts * Upon going to to high school, this tropers on and off boyfriend suddnely became POPULAR and therfore out of my league. Now he acts about and steals shit and he isn't the same * For most of her life, this troper has lived overseas, and only now is back in the States for college. Usually, when she moves (around every three years) it isn't so hard because even though everything is different, we're together as a family. Now, I'm more on my own, and the house that they live in (overseas) doesn't feel like my home. I guess you cant go home again. Go back to [[StatusQuoIsGod Nothing Is The Same Anymore]]...if you [[NothingIsTheSameAnymore can]]. ----

NotHyperbole * [[@/{{Seiryu}} This troper]] took Tae Kwon Do in high school and college, all with the same teacher. When I suggested that a friend that he should join, the following conversation took place. -->'''Friend''': Give me one good reason why I should join. -->'''Seiryu''': He can take a guy down by bowing. -->{{Beat}} -->'''Friend''': I think you're full of shit, but you know what? I'll try it for a couple days. ** A week later, my friend knew how to take a guy down by bowing. -->'''Friend''': [[CrowningMomentOfFunny Holy shit, you weren't kidding!]]

NotInMyBackYard A list of RealLife examples of the trope NotInMyBackyard happening to {{Troper}}s. ---* Subverted here in Chino: We're a stone's throw from the Chino Institute for Men and yet we're one of the safest cites around this side of Pomona. But are we known for our safe environment? Noooo.... * {{George Carlin}} [[http://www.youtube.com/watch#!v=43Egm0j_p1A did an entire bit about it.]]

* This doesn't just apply to housing; there are some businesses who can be just as picky about what's next to their parking lot as is a person who owns a house on some land. Some mall, hotel, and entertainment businesses will refuse to have their facilities built next to more "low-brow" businesses (like fast food joints, trucks stops, and grocery stores) or residents simply because it will make their overall image look bad. * The proposed Tasmanian pulp mill has generated this reaction to the point of garnering national attention over the rather divided opinions, even to action against the company. * In Germany, it's called the "St. Florians-Prinzip" (Saint Florian's principle). Named after the saint who saves believers from fires. What it means? This sentence tells it: "Dear Saint Florian, spare my house, light up someone else's!" (In German, it rhymes.) * Home owner's associations (HOAs) which have jurisdiction over homes in their area. They can restrict everything from the color of houses to the use of clothes lines. This has lead to several legal battles between residents and HOAs claiming to act in the best interest of the community. * This troper's subdivision was going to get a mall when she was a kid, but as soon as the Coming Soon signs went up, the petitions went around. The lot lay conspicuously empty for almost ten years until somebody finally built a temple in there, and nobody minded because temples don't have food courts and food disposal bins that attract mice.

NotListeningToMeAreYou * This troper goes through this all the freaking time with her computer game obsessed mother. And then said mother wonders why I'm so angry all the time. ** This troper's mother appears to suffer from some kind of satellite delay on conversation. Occasionally, messages get lost entirely. *** My mom is exactly the same way; she tends to stop talking midsentence, usually prompting me to ask whether or not she wants me to put in another quarter before she'll finish her thought. And to the first troper: do you realize just how many nine-year-olds wish they grew up your mom? * Considering people (particularly her friends) tend to go off onto other conversations and such and forgetting she's there while she's in the middle of saying something, [[DarkInsanity13 this troper]] thinks she ought to try this to see if it works. * If [[{{Cameoflage}} this troper]] thinks the person she's trying to say something to/''was'' talking to isn't paying attention, she'll switch mid-sentence into either BlahBlahBlah or something nonsensical (disproportionately often, the first thing that comes to mind is a variant of "the alien invasion last Tuesday"). On at least one occasion, it got a laugh from someone nearby who wasn't involved in the conversation. * This happens to this troper quite often with her parents, to the point where she can say "...and you aren't listening. Since you aren't

listening, I'm going to go kill myself now." This happened quite recently, in fact, and her SISTER, who hadn't even been part of the conversation, began to laugh, while her parents continued on their merry way. * For me, My mum is more likely to listen to me if I try and talk to dad. I'll even joke to Dad about how mum isn't paying attention, not even when i'm complaining about her not paying attention loud enough for her to hear when she's in the same room. * [[{{Nomic}} This troper]] does this a lot with his brother, who has a tendency to not pay attention to what he's saying. Usually it goes something like this: "...And I told him I return the book next week....Aaand you're not listening again... The stars are soon right and the Great Old Ones return, madness will reign, all thign will perish, blah blah blah...Oh good,now you're listenign again. So, as I said..." * This troper deals with this every day with her father. Ninety percent of his day is spent staring slackjawed and glassy-eyed at our TV set. * [[{{Gobolt}} This troper's]] friend is kinda like this. You can speak to him merrily for a fair amount of time, and then he'll interrupt you by asking what you were talking about. Also, he tends to speak in a somewhat hard to hear voice, so sometimes you're talking to him, and suddenly the conversation turns into both of us asking each other what the other one said, for some five minutes straight. Admittedly, the friend in question has the makings of an AbsentMindedProfessor. * This troper is the unfortunate victim of 'not listening to me are you?'. It got so bad once that this troper screamed, "ARE YOU FUCKING ''LISTENING'' TO ME?!" Friend turns around and [[DeadpanSnarker replied]], "Nope, not in the least." * This troper has this done to him all the time when he IS listening. It's so frustrating that's he's started giving snarky responses or quoting the speaker verbatim. * Happens with everyone in [[DarkInsanity13 this troper's]] family. She and her mother are particularly guilty of this while reading books. Her brother often starts mocking her when he wants her to listen, and usually finds out that she ''was'' listening. * This troper simply Adores subverting this with his parents. They'll come in and try to talk to him/his friends when they quite obviously doing something (watching a movie intently, playing a video game.....intently...basically, if they bothered to look at our faces, they'd know to not talk for a few minutes). When they voice the trope in question, this troper will spout their last few sentences, verbatim, including some commentary. "You said, "You need to go pick up your sister in an hour, and pick up some milk on the way home, and then you took a drink of your diet coke, and then---etc, etc, etc) * [[NeoSilverThorn This Troper]] tends to subvert this, but has on one occasion completely inverted it due to his ability to multitask: He answered his english teacher's question on the assigned reading (First four scenes of ''The Crucible''), gave his opinions on the four previous answers (as per class requirements), and inquired if there was going to be any books assigned that would take longer than two and

a half hours to read. That last comment got him kicked from the class. * This troper tends to subvert this quite a lot due to the fact that she doesn't look at people while they're speaking and will often carry on with what she was doing at the same time. When they go 'were you even listening to me?' or 'you didn't hear a word I just said did you?' she'll recite exactly what they just said. Usually she can carry a conversation while doing something else, but this tends to happen when the only appropriate response is 'yeah okay' or something similar. * [[AllanAokage I]] tend to ponder this if a RantInducingSlight appears. As in, he will complete his rant, then use the trope (by name) when he either runs out of things to say, or when the person listening to the rant is clearly not paying attention... both, probably. * Happens. Sometimes inverted. * This troper is the one who's usually asked whether she's listening. Both of my sisters talk at incredible length about unshared interests, which are so boring to me that my eyes glaze over - sometimes I'm genuinely not paying any attention, because they'll be just as satisfied to have it out of their systems even if I make no relevant comments. * [[TheRenaissanceRaver This Troper]], unfortunately, is quite certain that she uses this phrase at least once or twice a month and at most once a week on average. This is with just about anyone - friends, parents, other relatives, total strangers. And people wonder why she's so incredibly loud... * This troper's parents (and one of her friends) seem to be prone to not listening, especially when we're arguing. At one point, while arguing about I should be forced to go to the beach with them (despite living in Australia for 13 years, I still can't stand hot weather, and it was about 40 C that day), my dad refused to listen to anything coming out of my mouth. Eventually, I said, "I don't want to go because the purple elephants will dance on my head." My father responded with his usual, "But you ''never'' go outside!" * This editor just did it today. I was talking to my mom about the recent flooding in our state while she was typing an e-mail. I didn't think she was listening, so I threw in the sentence, "And then we'll fly to the moon on pancakes." Turns out she WAS listening, as she gave me a definite "WTF?" look, then we both cracked up laughing. * [[{{MiraShio}} Mira-chan]] knows how it feels to have a tech-savvy mother. Her mom spends a lot of time on the laptop and has extreme selective attention focused upon it. Whenever Mira-chan says something, the response comes no less than a minute later. There are also times when her mom completely misses what Mira-chan says. -->'''Mira-chan''': *goes into a long-winded and detailed description of something* -->'''Mom''': ... sorry? -->'''Mira-chan''': *AsideGlance* * This troper and a cousin just inverted this. -->Troper: (*In the computer, listening to music and writing something*) -->Cousin: ...And then, we went to the beach, and we were so close to

the sea, that... -->Troper: (*[[DeadpanSnarker Deadpan]]*) I'm not listening to you. Please shut up. -->Cousin: ...... And we were like so close to the sea... * This trope ''is'' my life to a T. I've actually tried saying extreme things only to merely prove I was ignored by my family. Whenever I try to explain stuff from my point of view, they merely ignore me and continue lecturing me, causing me to ''constantly'' repeat myself because they don't seem to be able to ''LISTEN'' to me, and even after I repeat myself or spell it out for them, they ''still'' either ignore me or, at best, listen once and then [[ViewersAreGoldfish proceed to forget I ever mentioned it within ten seconds]]. It's honestly gotten to the point where I don't even talk to them. Do you want to know what it's like? Well imagine calling a telephone service...it starts listing options and asks you to press a button. You press the button...and it keeps listing options. It then repeats no matter how many times you press the button. You then press it so hard your finger and the button go right through the phone itself and then the phone yells at you for not listening. * This troper's mother was half-asleep and asked if the troper's stepfather was home (he'd been home for hours, and the mom would have known that, had she been fully awake.) This troper said "Yeah, mom, he's been home for a while ... he brought dinner? *sees that mom is zonked out* He also brought a [[OurZombiesAreDifferent zombie.]] We're dating; his name is Spike." THAT woke the troper's mom up. Laughing, thankfully. * This troper gets this a lot because he tends to do something else during a conversation because he finds making endless eye contact to be kind of awkward. That said, he he usually ''is'' listening and is genuinely interested. * I have 2 examples, my mom is impossible to tell because it always takes her 5 minutes to react to what i'm saying. also, my friend will intentionally tune out whenever i'm talking about something he doesn't have any intrest in, usually as a joke. * A variation in which the out-of-context line tests not distraction but lazy incompetence: a friend of this troper handed in for his History exam in high school a sheet densely covered with answerrelated text all over, with a random line about football thrown in somewhere. The professor gave a good grade without remarking on the random line, thus confirming our suspicion that she didn't read the exams but gave grades just based on the amount written. * This troper's mother has grown so used to this that she actually once said, "Talking to yourself is the first sign of madness. Expecting an answer is the second." [[{{SubvertedTrope}} I had actually been listening to her, just couldn't think of an answer to her previous question.]] I laughed at that one. She also occasionally talks to herself as a lampshade of this trope. * When this troper is feeling ignored by her friends, she will often spit out several non-sequitors in sequence. My personal favorites are, "I'm going to bring a panda to school tomorrow," "You smell like butter," and "I think there's an alien invasion going on." * This Troper had a health teacher in high school who didn't know what

the fuck he was doing. He would say "Read the chapter, write down (insert random number) facts you've learned from it." then sit back with his coffee and newspaper. As an experiment, I wrote "The teacher is a complete idiot who isn't even reading this." as one of the facts. Seeing as how I still got 100, I was right. * This Troper was discussing her to-do list for the day to her husband. After he grunted for the fourth time (he's not a morning person) I added "Then I'll dye my hair green and shave it into a mohawk." He said "OK" and rolled over and went back to sleep. * This troper's female friend says this to me a lot. It's usually followed by [[TheStoic ineffectual]] [[TooKinkyToTorture beatings]]. * I do that all the time. Favorite method to the point of becoming a catchphrase is mentioning sentient oysters. * This troper and his friends do this to eachother all the time, since all of us have a habit of rambling about our new favorite thing that just happened/is coming out soon/we bought. Although sometimes we have to do it to eachother instead. "I wasn't actually listening to that." * This troper has a frequent habit of going on a slight tangent only to realise after about a minute that the people he was talking with have started another conversation or found something else to focus on. Particularly irritating when it is your mother and your sister you are talking to and it is on a subject they asked you to talk about. ---Go back to [[NotListeningToMeAreYou Not Listening... to the Pope on his vacation in Jamaica]]. Did you hear a word I just said? ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NotNamedInOpeningCredits * This troper watched a highly metafictional college play entitled ''Staged Reading'' where, in a gutsy move, the actor who played the surprise character did not exist in the program (no profile, no photo, no listing in the credits) so that when he popped out of the audience and stormed angrily onstage it genuinely was disorienting and shocking. This troper wonders if this has ever been done in a largerscale production, with actors who have agents.

NotNowKiddo * My second earliest childhood memory is of visiting the house of a friend of my mother, along with said friend's little niece, when I was 2-and-a-half. My mother cracks up whenever she recalls how I stood by the table she and her friend were sitting at on the patio, telling them something, and they kept half-heartedly replying, "That's nice, honey" and the like over and over again until I walked up right in front of them and screamed "THE BABY'S EATING DOG FOOD!" Finally, they also noticed that the baby girl was sitting by the dog dish stuffing tons of kibble into her cheeks and ran to intervene. <<|TroperTales|>>

NotQuiteTheRightThing * This troper had to make a choice between trying to walk to his sister's house or calling for help when he got stuck at school. I called my parents to tell them I got stuck at school, and they immediately cussed me out for missing the bus in the first place...whereas had I tried to walk to my sister's house, they'd bitch at me for not calling them. IgnusZwei: One night, A young man found a boy picking coins out of a fountain. Confronting the boy, the man found out that the boy was given an allowance for his birthday, had spent his coin unwisely and didn't have enough money for a train ticket home. It was cold, it was late, and he didn't want to have to walk all the way back. The young man would have none of it, incensed that the boy would take money apparently meant for the poor. He forced him to return the money, proud that he had done the right thing. The boy had to walk back home for hours, and because he did not know the city all that well, he had to follow the railway tracks, taking him to some dark backstreets along the way. Yes, the boy was this Troper, and while he made it back home, he never forgot the young man, and this painfully learned lesson: ''Righteousness is for assholes''. ---No, going back to NotQuiteTheRightThing isn't ''the best'' choice.... ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NotSafeForWork * This troper uses NSFN (Not Safe For Noobs) as a content warning for videos of someone conquering NintendoHard games.

NotSoDifferent * I really dislike my JerkAss uncle. My grandma often reminds me that [[StrawHypocrite I have some of the traits/habits I find annoying in him]]. It frightens me, I don't want to become a passive-aggressive, sexually frustrated 40-year-old basement dweller who can't take care of himself. * This troper's sister pounds on random nearby objects with her fists when she gets angry and/or frustrated. This troper [[TheSpock should have been born a Vulcan]], given her devotion to logic and keeping her emotions on a tight leash, but still sometimes hits things in the heat of the moment when she gets mad enough. This is always ''immediately'' followed by a wave of shame and self-loathing, because it means she's just behaved exactly like the sister she despises everything about. * This troper has argued that he despises 'car culture' in the past,

then later became addicted to go-karting. He has also stated his hatred of 'free-loaders' doing 'useless' subjects like art, he now studies pure mathematics, possibly the most useless subject in the world. To round off the trio he often likes to say how much he hates hypocrites. * This troper is ashamed at the things she's done online, as it makes her realize that she's not so different from a [[VitriolicBestBuds Vitriolic Best Bud]] of hers that she hates for being such an ''annoying'' fangirl for the silliest of things. Looking at the flame wars and other ridiculous things this troper has participated in, she hates that those actions aren't so different, if not '''worse''' than her aquaintance's stupid gushing. ** On another note, this troper wants to desperately berate said girl for the things she's been doing within the past few years. The girl hates her mother for cheating on her father and ruining the family (or something to that extent). What's funny is that said girl has a twisted sense of commitment, thinking it's okay to be in a threesome when you're romantically involved with someone and neither of the other two are them. Troper ''really'' can't wait for the day when she screws it all up so she can say this trope. * [[Tropers/GodofPH This Troper]] used to belittle his fellow male classmates for always dating younger girls, believing it to be a widespread plague of Cradle Robbery. I prided myself on always trying to date girls my own age...until I learned the girls my age tend to be more conceited and full of themselves. Now I've become the very thing I swore to destroy: an eighteen-year-old with a sixteen-year-old girlfriend. ** [[SarcasmMode Two years? You pedophile!]] ** He is so not. [[CompletelyMissingThePoint He is an EPHEBOPHILE]]. (Seriously though, dude, you have my full support.) ** It's okay dude, I dated a 17-year-old guy when I was 12. My bro dated a 14-year-old girl when he was 26. MayDecemberRomance is not bad. *** Uh..... {{YMMV}} on that that last statement. The amount of {{Squick}} and [[CriticalResearchFailure Critical Research Failure]] that goes into 12 year olds dating 17 year olds, and 26 year olds dating 14 year olds is absurd, and those age differences are ''far, FAR'' different from a 18 year old and a 16 year old dating. * This troper met his former girlfriend whilst helping her recover from a rather traumatic event with her previous boyfriend. After some time had past she got over her hatred of him, (Partly due to this troper forcing him into a situation where he had to admit his faults to her and apologize like a man.) after this situation this troper kept speaking him over his instant messenger citing his reason for doing so as trying to keep as close to his girlfriend as possible through her friends. Over time resentment turned into disgust, and finally realization as he realized that they were Not So Different after all, in fact having a rather Red Oni Blue Oni contrast between them. This troper is currently broken up with his girlfriend but still maintains very good relations with her friend, unabashed at thinking of him as a brother. * [[NeoSilverThorn This troper]] has had this trope thrown in his face

twice in his life. The first was being compared to his father, which was basically true FromACertainPointOfView. The second was after he'd stopped a fight between his friend and the high school's resident JerkAss. Said jerkass- who had known this troper for years- invoked this trope, only to get a two word ShutUpHannibal in reply: "Not anymore." To the small crowd who saw it, the whole moment is considered a CrowningMomentOfAwesome for the troper, despite his objections. * This Troper's father is basically a cross between Dr. House and Gordon Ramsay, a sarcastic, anti-social, tempermental misanthrope that swears profusely when angry. This Troper's starting college, and has hit a few roadblocks because he is nearly constantly irritated by people around him, has a foul mouth, has a mean sarcastic streak longer than a football field, and doesn't like people in general. Not fucking pleased about this in the least. * When I suddenly realized that I'm annoying. One of the people at school is the most annoying person ever, but he isn't on purpose. One of the things he does is tell people about things that they don't care about or ever showed any interest in. I caught myself doing the same. ** In a more serious version, when I found myself getting incredibly angry at stupid things and letting it build up instead of just letting it out, I realized I was turning into my Dad, who moved out of the house because of violence. Then my Dad gave up drinking, smoking and started scuba-diving as well as wallclimbing and other random sports, and basically becoming the most awesome person I'll ever have the joy of being related to, and I realized that being not so different from him wasn't so bad. * I often get [[AnnoyingYoungerSibling annoyed at my brother]] for behavior that I used to show at that age. * This troper is rather indifferent to a certain classmate, and ostracizes him with the class, from the class. Every other day, he realizes that the 2 of us are remarkably similar in terms of personality, except that this troper is smart enough to use them to get friends in his class, while the unlucky classmate hasn't. Being a GenreSavvy ChaoticNeutral, something he's not, this troper refuses to do anything to help, because once he's no longer the class scapegoat, there's a pretty good chance this troper would wind up as the new one. * [[Tropers/PrimoVictoria This troper]] got suddenly whole chain of those. First of all, there's an annoying classmate everybody dislikes I realized how similar he is to the way I once were and how much we have in common after our first talk, but couldn't stand him anyway. He actually made me realize how much annoying I was. I was trying to help him, until his irritating, perverted and sexist behavior didn't make me quit on him like everybody else. Once I was talking about how bad person he is with bunch of other guys, despite my dislike towards people who tells worse things behind the back, but will never have a balls to tell it to person in question straight in the face. Next time the guy actually irritated me, I delivered angry ReasonYouSuckSpeech to him, just to prove myself I'm different than them. And then I realized that, among other things, I told him to grow up which is argument I deeply hate. * Me and my sister thought we were very different, and we never got

on, but one night we actually had a conversation with eachother and we realised that we were NotSoDifferent and would have realised that sooner if we actually talked to eachother * [[Tropers/{{Zadia}} Zadia]] really hates her sister. We have very different tastes in music, books and tv shows with only a few crossovers, but apparently we do look a little similar and we sound so alike that our friends cannot tell us apart over the phone (and often our family can't either). I've realised that we are more similar than I'd like- but we are still different. Thank God. * ThisTroper never got along with a girl in most of her classes. In our American Goverment and Politics class, we discovered that both of us are liberals, both of us are [[BiTheWay bisexuals]], and now we even work at the same place. We get along slightly better now, but not much... * Rare positive example: one of This Troper's closest friends often has fights and arguments with him, but our realizing/acknowledging that we're NotSoDifferent keeps us so close. More recently, a variation of this was used negatively: after the friend in question realized that he, a Christian, and This Troper, a Unitartan Universalist, considered each other AcceptableReligiousTargets, he claimed that This Troper was the closed-minded one of the two, despite it being obvious that he's just as bad as (if not worse than) This Troper. This Troper never called the friend out on it, but our friendship is slowly dwindling... ** This Troper also had an inversion with his Ex-Girlfriend while they were still going out. As it turns out, our political, religious, and even views on romance, were opposite. We broke up a few weeks later, but we remain best friends. * Despite a youthful attitude of 'my mom is a total prep who wants me to be just like her, but I'm totally not and she can't make me,' this troper has, in the last few years, realized how much like her mother she has become. Honestly, it's not necessarily a bad thing, either. My mother was a much better person that 13-year-old me ever realized. * This overlaps with StopBeingStereotypical. [[@/{{endlessness}} This Brazilian troper]] has met an InternetToughGuy which hates Brazilians for being uneducated/stupid/prejudiced/etc, all of this while he behaves exactly like the [=Straw Brazilian=] he set up: obnoxious behaviour, from posting all-caps walls of text to behaving like the strawmen he hates, when he complains on "how Brazilians are obnoxious". Error-filled posts when he complains that "we" are dumb. * I hate my mother thanks to seventeen years of neglect and emotional abuse. Over the past few years I've realized that we're actually a lot a like: we're both workaholics with bareley any friends, we both have hidden anger issues, and we both hate our mothers. I've even started developing the same habits as her, like staying up working and falling asleep at my desk, and pacing when I'm frustrated. That's only scratching the surface, but I still think it's a little creepy. * This troper's mother likes to tell her how similar she is to her father, and she is [[Understatement not amused]]. The man is emotionally abusive, has temper problems, and a tendency to yell. This troper may be a slight Tsundere (Type B, mind you) but she has never yelled at anyone, and she hopes to keep it that way.

---This page gets more like NotSoDifferent every day. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NotSoHarmless For when people just don't take you seriously. And regret it.

* This troper is a quiet guy who doesn't drink or invite people over to his student village appartment while his two flatmates booze nearly every night and invite rowdy friends over.One time I was minding my own business,making and eating dinner,when some (girl)friend of theirs started making faux sexual passes at me.I ignored her.When I was nearly finished she started flinging old teabags at me.I deflected most of them with a paper towel until one them hit me square in the head and made an awful mess.Having enduring countless horseshit from the likes of her and the rest of my flatmates's friends I duly tossed all of my dinner all over her. A CMOA for me anyway.Unfortunately this crossed the line of my rowdy boozing flatmates and people like meeven less.Shades of AbuseIsOkayWhenItsFemaleOnMale here. ** Why did you try to ignore her sexual passes, and what makes you think they were insincere? ** Sometimes girls (or boys) will make sexual passes, but you can obviously tell their doing it just to mock you. I'm pretty sure this was what the troper was dealing with. * This troper's friend's ex boyfriend was messing with the friend. So this troper stepped up and told the boyfriend to back off. This troper? 5 feet, 100 pounds, squishy-esh. He got up in this troper's face, not thinking she could harm him. She had him on the floor crying in under a minute. * This troper and his friend are rowers. We often row in as a pair. We are also the heaviest rowers on the team. We also keep chatting before a race, when most people are warming up and psyching up. Nobody takes us seriously. But we kick ass every time we race. * This Troper [[TheWoobie was picked on a lot]] in middle school and [[TheStoic just took it]] for most of the year but near the end of the year [[NotSoHarmless he had enough of the bullies]] and when one tried to mess with him he chased the guy down and had to be restrained by 2 gym teachers and a cop before stopping his RoaringRampageOfRevenge against the guy, who was at the time sitting in a corner and looked like he was about to piss his pants. Scared the entire school for the rest of the time I was there and no more bullies either. * This troper remembers a Ditzy Libby from middle school a bit too dumb to be really malevolent. Her worst was when she was accused of...having a zit and then shin kicking the accuser. Come high school, she graduated to true Libby status, partnered with this troper for his BigBad reign, and ''she had minions.'' * This troper's older brother was bullied badly in secondary school. That is until he faught back against one and broke both of the bully's

legs in the process. He got suspended for a while, but I'll defend my elder brother just this once. * A common StarSystem character of mine, Callodes, is often this. He looks stoned most of the time, eyes half closed, always smiling and content. But, this one time in an Animorphs RP, he found out his best friend was a Controller. Callodes made a FaceHeelTurn in a nasty way, torturing said friend, and then impaling him to a wall by a sword. Callodes stayed HighOctaneNightmareFuel the rest of the RP. He was basically our own Johan Liebert. And he started as a CloodCuckoolander... * This troper recently started playing S4 League. I was playing on a high level server with a friend who introduced me to the game. Anyway, we join up on a match, the opposing team took one look at my character level and likely wrote me off as a noob. Not 2 minutes into the match and I see thats no beginner in the chat box while I was sniping them from across the map. The rest of the match had me locked in a 2on-1 sniper duel, with me often counter-sniping their counter-snipers. * I often defeat the older,more experinced, seemingly more worldly members of my roleplaying group in various games by acting more naive and distracted than normal, and simply not giving any reason to attack me until its too late to stop me. Nothing like activating 10 powerup cards in a row on the final round of Munchking * This troper is often quiet and non-confrontational. However, when sufficiently pissed off he will snap back at the offender. The last person who ticked him off was left crying "He hates me, he hates me!"

NotSoImaginaryFriend * A student in [[{{Tsochar}} this troper]]'s English class claimed to have a girlfriend named 'Shaniqua,' which started with the teacher catching him getting a message during/after class, if I recall correctly. A long-running joke in the class was that nobody believed this girl exists. He claimed he didn't care what we thought either way. We never did find out whether or not she was real... * This troper got some superglue on the back of a book he borrowed from a friend. Nobody believes that it's really superglue though. The running joke is that the book was so awesome.... stuff happened. If you know what I mean. ** Unless there's more to this story, this should really be under NotWhatItLooksLike. * Once this troper, who was attending an all boys school, had an extremely attractive girlfriend. Since he had the social status of pond scum his classmates never believed she existed (or that if she did she must have been too fugly to get anyone else). Even when they saw her he could not convince anyone that she wasn't his sister. ** You two should have made out. If you can't make them believe you, squick them. * This troper got sent to therapy for her not-so-imaginary friend. Dylan was a ghost who liked to play pranks and move objects and thus nobody believed her. That was until he was very much clearly proven as there and therapy was immediately called off. ** Er... was he actually a ghost, or just a living person who was

particularly elusive? * Tropers/AlsoArin did this with an entire ''country'' once. When she was younger, her babysitter didn't believe Persia existed. ** For the sake of nitpicking: It doesn't. The area is now called Iran. * This Troper is writing a story where one of the characters has one of these. Who looks exactly like her. Although it is kind of ambiguous whether the friend is a separate entity, a twin from another dimension, a manifestation of some part of her mind, or the same person. (It's a weird story.) ---I swear, NotSoImaginaryFriend is a real trope! Click the link if you don't believe me! ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NotSoInnocentWhistle * This troper managed to pull it on a forum that had karma meters another poster was trying to get the lowest karma points possible. This troper and a few other people were raising it back up because he was being so obnoxious. After an angry rant from him asking who was doing it, this troper posted, "Oh, I have no idea who it could be... *walks away whistling*" * This troper can't whistle. He twiddles his thumbs and looks in the opposite direction when he wants to invoke this instead. * This troper does this all the time. Nobody has ever picked up on it. * This troper actually whistles random video game music when he's being obviously mischeivious. Sometimes I do it when I'm completely innocent. You never know... * One of my friends does a certain type of whistle whenever he's trying to matchmake someone. Funnily enough, no-one other than me has noticed. * My older brother does this all the time. He can't whistle worth a damn, though, so it's painfully obvious to ''everybody'' except him. But that's not the only thing that makes it so painfully obvious. Every time I randomly whistle (not this trope, just randomly), he tells me to stop, so unless he's a total hypocrite, he just hates whistling...so why would he just suddenly start doing it? * I once tried to do this to a friend, who I had accidentally pushed over. Unfortunately, I forgot that I couldn't whistle and ended up spitting on his face. <<|TroperTales|>>

NotSoStoic * This troper didn't show emotion through his last 2 years at elementary school. But, during our "Graduation" party, his eyes ran because it forced him to face it. then, on the last day of school, almost everybody else started crying, and he broke down because he would not see many of his friends again.

* A good friend of mine was a book example of both a Stoic and a Deadpan Snarker - I have seen her cry two times in the six year history of our friendship, and those were clearly tears of pain after she broke her nose and got accidentaly hit. A year ago, at the school year ending, she suddenly hugged me and bursted into tears in front of everyone. Sobbing, she told me, that she doesn't want to grow up and leave me. Seeing this rock-hard girl crying like a baby was one of the strongest experiences in my life. * This troper had a tendency to just be very quiet and stick to himself in middle school, rarely if ever showing emotion or even speaking unless spoken to. Any time I swore, I could count on at least a couple of nearby students staring at me in complete shock. * [[Tropers.ReikoKazama This troper]] is usually {{The Stoic}} when at Venturers... until that one night I was there when our Venturer leader, Robyn, was away, and her replacement, the mum of one of the other Venturers, caught me swearing quietly and sent me out for it. Cue screaming and yelling at her and then going over to the swings (yes, our Scout Hall is located near the basketball court type thing of the local playground) to calm down... WITHOUT TELLING ANYONE. Keep in mind that this is not {{Arson Murder And Jaywalking}}, because when I first became a Venturer, Robyn had made it very clear that I was not to wander off as I had been wont to do as a Scout. I had to be taken home early, and thanked the Lord that I had a talent night the next week. ** Oh, and at home, I'm just... normal. At school, I don't lose it unless I'm doing something on the computer and one of the bullies [[BerserkButton sneaks up and turns it off]]. Cue {{Unstoppable Rage}}. It's only when I'm at Venturers that I feel like I have to lock my emotions away. *** "sjust"? Bah. I meant "just". Stupid typos. * This troper is always very stoic and hardly reacts to anything, unless his GF is around in which cause he can't seem to stay serious. * This troper may not be known as stoic so much as "mellow in the face of adversity" (see: Coming in second place in a contest while finishing in half the time of the other contestants, simply because because I wasn't ripping my hair out about colour schemes), but my friends constantly comment about how startled and shocked they are when me and my mother suddenly explode in to a "screaming fit to end all screaming fits". They say this despite the fact that we do this on a semi regular basis, our arguments sometimes dissolving in to throwing things at each other. Needless to say, this is our way of relieving stress, usually with both of us being wrong, and we're on relative good footing with each other. * During my entire school day, i'm incredibly mellow, being very, very hard to provoke into any kind of real emotion. However, when I go into Gym, I suddenly become like the definition of Crazy Awesome according to my friends. Once, a senior did the whole trick trip thing where he got someone to bend down behind me and pushed me. I waited about five minutes, and then barreled into him as hard as I could. Keep in mind, i'm a football lineman weighing in at over 280 pounds. The senior went out like a light, and everyone just couldn't stop laughing for a good few minutes. Another time is when we were playing kickball, and this

one kid was being real c***y, taking his time before throwing the ball. When he threw it, I just hollered "F*** YOU!", punching the ball as it came towards me and sending it across the entire gym. There was even more laughter. And let's not forget when we played pickleball, I managed to hit the ball into one of the little fan things, where it by all rights should have just slid off. Nope. I managed to hit the ONE SPOT in the very small fan where it would stay still. I then ran around all the bases about twenty times, screaming "INFINITE HOME RUN!". It was pretty epic. Oh, and all of this happened in the last month. And then, when the people in my gym class see me in my normal environment, they're almost freaked out about how calm I am. Pretty intense. * This troper is also similarly mellow, but one time in high school, a little confrontation ended with the football team's star player bashing him in the nose with his history book, at which point this troper proceeded to beat the holy s*** out of him. * Tropers/RedWren tends to react to truly terrible things by either shutting down or going into hysterics. For instance, after convincing herself that others didn't mean to make her feel like she was less than a person, some stupid classmate says: "Like you're even human." Cue this troper trembling, then collapsing to her desk, sobbing. No one in the class knew how to react, teacher included. ...What? Someone needed to even out the anger quotient! ** This troper is the same way, and thinks that "I'm sorry" would have been a suitable reaction. ** *[[SmileTropes laugh]]* [[SincerityMode Your sympathy is appreciated, thanks.]] * [[@/{{Geostomp}} This Troper]] rarely goes out of his way to show emotion or even [[TheQuietOne speak]] unless he has a real reason to do so. The only times he shows his emotions blatantly are during instances of this trope. Which, combined with his [[ScaryBlackMan appearance]], often lead some very unfortunate understandings. * I'm normally so stoic its lampshaded by members of the charity group I work with. I've only barely cleared myself of being labelled heartless by lampshading a {{Tearjerker}} story someone was telling after I showed no outward emotional signs and seemed completely cold, and I'm well known for keeping a straight face. This stoic reputation quickly went to hell after I'd screwed up organising the tickets to where we were going to collect. Despite the rest of the group managing to sort the mess out, I was noticeably anxious and angry at myself the entire time. * This troper is making a videogame. At one point, the player is given an exit, but only he can use it, leaving behind two teammates and the body of someone who just died to get them this far. If you try to choose not to go, the Stoic of the team just logically explains why you should get out now. If you keep trying to stay, he flips out and starts yelling at you to make sure at least one person survives this instead of staying behind and dying like an idiot. ** This game sounds good. You mind linking us to it when its ready? * {{HSZMV}} is normally TheStoic of his groups of friends, to the point that he is almost the StoneWall of the group in terms of insults (being 6'3" and 200 lbs doesn't hurt for his roll in an actual fight,

either). That said, he wonders if some of his antagonists would still continue to poke his buttons if they knew that he's been to counseling for Anger Management Issues. That BeserkerButton is hard to press, but pressing it is never good. * MAI 742 developed stoicism as a response to a decade's worth of social... displacement. No insult is as ineffective as that which has no effect. This lead to problems when my situation changed; suffice to say, in a new environment I couldn't adapt to people genuinely being interested in me and needing to be responsive all the time, leading to some unfounded accusations of superiority and sociopathy. Thankfully, this has since been cleared up for the better. * This troper is TheStoic of her entire grade. She usually keeps her face completely devoid of anything but typical stoic traits--most of the time, dignified disdain. Most other people are afraid and uncomfortable around her due to this and keep away. However, there's one friend this troper knows who is uncomfortable with her stoicism but continues to be her friend. It was this friend that this troper broke down in front of when she was having a bad day. Her friend's response? "I like you better with emotions." * Examples by This Troper: ** This troper is {{The Stoic}} mostly at school. Maybe because of the [[{{Stoic Spectacles}} glasses]] I have to wear sometime in school. But outside of school and in P.E., I am full of emotion. Definitely at school, when being intellectual or [[{{The Spock}} logical]] at the moment or emotion I ''refuse'' to let out because of reputation or to add to entertainment. But when I'm near my friend, in school, P.E., or even outside of school, I am a stoic to him on purpose because he's a {{Grumpy Bear}} caused by a {{Dark and Troubled Past}} in middle school. I'm still friends with him because he's giving me [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dr2p25YQO80 Insensitivity training]] and adds to my ''balance'' of friend types. ** FrozenFace? Check. No reaction at normally scary sneak attacks? Check. [[{{Feel No Pain}} Strong Pain Resistance?]] Check. [[{{Stoic Spectacles}} The glasses?]] Check. You could call me a {{Terminator}} and I wouldn't flinch at that. *** I'm not an extreme stoic (or insane). Decent things like being alone or a good rollercoaster I still enjoy. ** In what may be my straightest use of this trope, at the last funeral I went to, I think I started developing ''"[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HzKzB7Zgs7E#t=1m58s The Sexy Cry.]]''" (Maybe I should enter this as a Web Original example.) * This troper is usually pretty stoic, when my 14 year old dog vanished off her leash last week I took it pretty well, almost too well since I barely felt anything. However, when my cat drank from my dog's still full water bowl, I lost it, smacking her away and yelling at her for drinking my dogs water, then I just collapsed and started crying. * This troper has a friend who is very nice and fun enough to hang out with, but doesn't talk very much, and rarely shows much actual emotion, to the point that people have called him cold. One day though, he came into school and didn't talk at all, until a me and another friend pestered him about it at lunch the way we usually

would. After trying for maybe a minute of goading him into talking, he got up and we saw that he had been crying. He told us, in a shaky but menacing voice to leave him alone, and then he stormed out of the cafeteria. We later learned that his brother had suffered a massive heart attack, and could die if it happened again. * I'm not a cold, unfriendly person, I do show some emotion, but I'm mostly quiet. If I'm around people when a {{Tearjerker}} is going on (the ending of Brian's Song, Schindler's List, a documentary showing the last letters of soldiers in Iraq and the effects on their famlilies) my visible emotion isn't the same as everyone else's (some are crying, some are holding back tears, I look the same as I usually do). When I'm alone, I show more emotion. The reason for this is because I used to cry a lot when I was younger and was embarrassed by it (seriously, a 12 year old boy shouldn't cry that much). One day I decided I'd had enough of that crap and learned to, for the most part, hide my emotions. ** [[Tropers/{{Icarael}} I am]] somewhat like you, I guess. Ever since I got to high school, I stopped crying (mostly) because it was making me look like a cry-baby. Nowadays, I don't show much emotion, even online. Sometimes feel embarrassed when I come across a TearJerker and can't cry, because I'm kinda torn between looking unmanly or heartless. So far, only one thing has ever made me cry out of genuine sadness and not laughter, frustration or rage: [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=idULzIIF950&feature=related this]]. I sometimes fear I may lack any form of empathy. * For the most part, this troper is very quiet, hardly speaking a word all freshman year. Jump to her sophmore year, where she's suddenly more talkative and hyper. Gave a whiplash to her teachers and peers. (What they didn't know was that she was give Prozac for the three year long depression she's had and was feeling really great.) ** Same troper as above. Recently she's been very talkative in class (no more Prozac). Oddly, even though everyone thought she was waaay too hyper and happy, she was actually feeling very down that day and was simply acting out. She added a comment to the end of each of the teacher's statement. It reached a breaking point when, after the teacher saying some may move out of the class since they don't like it, she said, "Why? Because you don't like them?" He gave her the stink eye for the rest of the class period. This troper still thinks it's extremely hilarious while all her friends were thinking "What the fuck was she on? She's usually so quiet!" * This troper shows symptoms of bipolarity. The "episodes" happen only a few times a year, and only last for a couple of weeks at most- and all the rest of the time, he's a CloudCuckooLander stoic. This combination of spacing out and thick-skinned-ness leads people to mentally designate him as "immune to stress" or "that quiet doormat type". That assessment is completely correct- usually. Until a bipolar episode crops up, at which point he usually has several consecutive [[FreakOut freak-outs]] from people still treating him like his soul is made of granite. [[MetaPhorgotten Fluffy, pliable, patient granite.]] Then he feels very guilty about the whole thing, and tries to be more stoic in the future, thus perpetuating the cycle of being seen as emotionally imperturbable.

* [[Tropers/AceBrock This troper]], when in public, is stoic almost all of the time. The exceptions are when he's under a lot of stress, and someone starts asking him about it, or when he sees something funny. * a bit of background: this troper has been picked on since she was 6, by any and all classmates, some cousins, church group...so theres that. she's also highly emotional, the last person you'd think to seem at all stoic. in 11th grade, she had to deal with a nasty jerkjock, who always tried to get a rise out of her, saying cruel and crude things, mocking her ideals, religion, hobbies- anything and everything. for the first time in nearly 11 years, she tried her hardest to 'just ignore it.' things came to a head one day when after several minutes of abuse( in class, no less, although we were watching a movie and had a sub) another classmate told him to lay off. he said, in essence, that it was fine to pick on this troper, as she had no feelings. to the shook of everyone in the room, this troper suddenly burst into loud sobs, screamed something at the kid, and ran, knocking over her desk in the process. * This troper is TheStoic, TheSpock, and TheDaria all wrapped up into one. I haven't cried over anything that has happened to me in years, even though [[JerkWithAHeartOfGold I do genuinely feel bad for people I care about when bad things happen to them]], I just have a very, very hard time showing it because I'm painfully awkward about opening up and showing my feelings. One day in my American lit class, we were all discussing a short story (which I found rather boring and unmoving while reading it) that dealt heavily with mental illness. I raised my hand to make a comment about my interpretation of one of the characters, and...without any warning whatsoever....literally went from being my normally-Stoic-self-engaged-as-always-and-interested-inthe-text to choking up right there in front of the whole class. I suddenly had started thinking about my mom, and my best friend who also is manic depressive. I still don't know what came over me. * This troper's friend is known for being extremely stoic, to the point of denying being friends with people he hangs out with regularly (apparently, it's all just a distraction). But when he gets drunk... He becomes the most hilariously endearing thing ever. "The floor is my new best friend... I must hug the floor." How cute. * This troper isn't so much stoic as a cheerful idiot, as he doesn't like to talk about his feelings much, since everyone has problems and he'd rather not have other people deal with his as well, and makes jokes about feelings instead. But then, he somehow got on the topic of his sick father with his friends. He stuck to his general routine of cracking jokes about his feelings and trying to assure everyone that it was okay; but suddenly in the middle of his joking behaviour he broke down crying, because he wasn't sure if it really was going to be okay at all. * I didn't know what I was classified as, but the more I read these page, and am told things by my friends, I've found out that I'm the Broken Bird Stoic Woobie that ends up being Not So Stoic. Middle school pretty much ruined me to the point where I cried twice a day, then after that...numbness. Cue me growing into the cynical sarcastic person I grew into. And yes, I went through a 5 year "Nobody gives a

crap anyways" phase, and a year of not speaking except for "Yes" and "No" and maybe 2 years without laughing. I do, however, still have feelings, but the only way to see them that doesn't result in being so beat up that you won't remember it, is to be my friend. Then I go right through the Not So Stoic and get back to the Broken Bird tendencies. * I(female) have this [[TheStoic friend]]. For a big deal of the year I barely bothered at talking to him, because he was always in a corner with his only friend while everybody was getting to meet each other (first year of college). But after a while my friends and I got a time to meet him and...it was like talking to a brickwall: he barely smiled and, when he did, it was condescending. But one day [[PluckyComicRelief other friend]] [[CrowningMomentOfFunny was talking about how you should treat your girl's parents]], and he not only laughed, but almost falls into the ground while doing it. It was borderline creepy. * This troper is typically a DeadpanSnarker, stoic around most people. But if he's close to them, such as his close family, he'll be quite open around them. He's also prone to fits of laughter and snickering at little things so he can change from stoic, to a snickering clown, to stoic in a few seconds. * This troper is usually fairly stoic around others (if slightly less so around his family), but news that suggests that getting into print journalism is difficult or impossible is one of the few things that can make him visibly upset when he's trying to keep his emotional guard up. There's also usually a brief moment after something unexpectedly bad happens that he's quite shaken, although he tends to regain his composure before long. * This troper doubly subverts this trope. She is normally a loud, energetic person, but when people do something that pushes her over the edge, she goes very cold, calculating, and DeadpanSnarker. However, if someone manages to [[CrossesTheLineTwice push her even FURTHER]], she REALLY loses her temper and starts screaming. * This troper has an online friend who isn't completely stoic, but he doesn't show many emotions other than anger, frustration, or mild amusement. He's the kind of person who makes fun of people's flaws so that people recognise them and get better, though most don't realize this. One day, it turned out that the cynical angry asshole who yells at people for being stupid [[CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming is actually an optimist and someone who sees the entire planet and everything and everyone on it as something beautiful.]] * This troper is trying to do this. He's good at it in public, and quite good when interacting with friends. On his own, however, he sometimes breaks down, utterly and completely. Stress can do that to him. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NotWearingPants * TruthInTelevision for ThisTroper right now. Thank you, internet.

** Hey, me too! *** And now [[AMereServantOfGod I]] am [[BrainBleach blind.]] *** From [[ADateWithRosiePalms what?]] *** My pants were too tight, so off they came! It's not like you guys can actually see me... right? *** ...[[SureLetsGoWithThat No, of course not.]] * This troper had a dream which inverted this trope. Instead of not wearing pants... I was wearing my pants, and only my pants. In the dream, I was walking around my school in between classes, taking the usual route from one class (maths) to another (Can't remember which), whilst in my Underwear, casually talking to a friend...Nobody brought up the fact that I was wearing no trousers, polo shirt or sweatshirt. * Not quite a dream, but definitely sleep-related: Whilst at a friend's house, This Troper fell asleep. According to said troper's friend and her mother, she then proceeded to walk into the kitchen, take off her trousers, walk upstairs (all the while having this really frightened expression on her face, whilst her friend kept asking what was wrong), bash her fists against her friend's computer keyboard, then [[HoYay get in her friend's bed]], and continue sleeping there. Said Troper's reaction upon waking up was ".....Why am I in * friend* 's bed? And ''why am I not wearing any trousers''?!" ** Bonus points if you woke up next to that friend. * This troper, not having the money (or really the desire) for a "real vacation" decided to simply spend his two weeks off from a boring clerical job being as lazy as humanly possible. Not once in that two week period did he wear pants. * This Troper doesn't always wear pants...even in ''public!'' [[spoiler: I wear skirts. What else could I have meant?]] * ThisTroper dreamed that she was NotWearingPants, or anything for the matter, at school. Now what could that mean? ** I want to meet you in dream world. * I once had a dream where I was stark naked and rushing to wherever. I was in a hallway and ran into some janitors and an instructor for one of my weekly acting classes. I tried covering myself with a mop, and the instructor said 'that's gonna be embarrasing when I see you this week!' I scurried off, embarrassed, and then accidentally walked into a ''stadium'' full of ''everyone I have ever met''. They were all staring. Then I woke up. * Anytime one finds oneself wearing shorts. Summer is common, though winter occurrences are not entirely unheard of, even in the colder cities. This troper has seen at least two cases in {{Pittsburgh}}. * This troper went fishing, fell asleep by the river. When he woke up, he was missing his pants. He has absolutely no idea what the hell happened, but it was sure as hell hilarious when one of his best friends, her mother and her boyfriend found him. --> Me: "Hey, how you doing?" --> Them: "..." * This troper has been having these sorts of dreams since elementary school. She's not really sure what, if any, meaning it has. * This troper has a good friend who refuses to wear actual pants in all but either formal occasions or the most extreme weather. [[spoiler: He wears shorts instead.]] He claims that because he is

from Vermont, he can endure the cold while this Georgia-born troper cannot. * [[Troper/{{Snes}} This Troper]] has had a number of dreams over the years where he finds himself in a public place and totally naked. The weird thing is, while he hides and seeks clothing, his attitude is one of minor annoyance rather than embarrassment and nobody else seems to care in the least. He wonders how this reflects on his psyche. ** The same has happened for [[Tropers/{{JET73L}} This Troper]]. * This troper had a moment like this in an online game. Of course he deliberately caused it himself, but it was hilarious while it lasted. * My dreams of being naked in public are almost always the version where no one notices. On several occasions, I have had this thought process in a dream: "It's actually rather weird that no one is noticing that I'm naked. Maybe I'm dreaming, that's probably it. No, wait a minute, I actually remember several other times when I was naked in public and no one noticed." These "memories" are also dreams, but my dreaming self forgets this and concludes that no, this is probably real life. * This Troper's younger brother, every day. He does put on pants when he leaves the house, and when family is coming over, but if people come over unannounced, there's not even an attempt to put more clothing on. Some of my friends have been flashed, more than once in some cases. They jokingly belong to a very exclusive, very unfortunate club. * About a week ago, this troper had a dream about taking public transit butt-naked (I think my reasoning in the dream was that I took a shower and couldn't be bothered to put my clothes back on), culminating in standing on [[StargateCity Cordova Street]] waiting for a bus (doubly odd because there aren't any buses that go down that street) with no pants or any other articles of clothing. The odd part is that I wasn't embarrassed about it, just kind of defensive. People were giving me weird looks, but not really ''staring''. * It wasn't a dream, but when I participated in my school's male pageant, I hung out (not [[IfYouKnowWhatIMean literally]]) in boxers backstage before the show. I'm also prone to removing my pants in plain sight when I have a costume change in Drama Club. It's much faster to change in the open than it is to find a hiding place. * I used to have dreams where I'd go to work or out shopping and realize I'd forgotten to put clothes on. Usually I was wearing either just underwear or only knickers but no bra in these dreams. Then I'd panic and have to find something to cover myself up with and hope nobody had noticed... often they hadn't actually. * Whenever [[Tropers.TwistedMidnightDreams]] has a dream were she goes on a field trip, she will inevitably take a shower and somehow lose her shirt. * [[TroublePanic I]] had a dream like this earlier, and it struck me as [[InsultedAwake so brazenly stereotypical that I woke up]]. * This troper's female friend once hijacked the PA system at our school and said "Attention X High School, I'm not wearing any pants." * This troper once spent the entirety of a gym class in his underwear without realizing it. Amazingly, no one noticed! * This troper's boyfriend called her right after she got out of the

shower. --> "Hi, I'm not wearing pants right now!" --> *awkward silence* --> "Or a shirt." --> "PleasePutSomeClothesOn" ** Im a guy, and i have this friend whose a girl. anytime we happen to be naked/topless whilst txtn each other, we imediatley let the other know in a context like: --> girl: hey whats up --> guy: not much, been boring today --> girl: oh that reminds me, guess what! --> guy: what? --> girl: im am totally naked! if you can believe it, we do it purely for laughs, now idk about her, but ive never once lied about it, i was always really naked when i told her i was ** I texted my boyfriend in the shower once, and told him just because I was amazed I did it without breaking my phone. He was amused by this and told me to tell him next time. Any time I remember that I'm texting him while I shower I make special mention of my lack of clothing. (The usual response is "XD") * This troper had a dream where he was the ONLY one wearing pants. Does that count? * *[[Tropers/{{Smerf}} Troper]] looks down, then back up* "What? It's called a kilt, sicko!" * This Troper had this dream once. Instead of panicing I thought "Should I put on pants? Nah." * This Troper heard a story once about a rehearsal of her high school's play a year ago: It was a mystery trial sort of thing, and one person was the detective, and so wore a trenchcoat. During one of the pre-dress-rehearsals, he was wearing the trenchcoat over his normal outfit, a t-shirt and shorts. With the coat on, you couldn't see the shorts. At all. So, he goes onstage, says his lines, and ends it with, "Special notation: I'm not wearing pants!" ** This Troper was in that show. It was ''Night of January 16th'' by {{Ayn Rand}}, and that was our running joke for the rest of the semester. * So this troper's mom was waiting for the car repairman for her insurance company to come. He came in a timely manner, but after a while, while he was repairing stuff, she noticed the fact that he wasn't wearing any pants. * Two things: One, I JUST had a dream where I showered in a public building, even though I hadn't brought clothes, and so I walked around n a modesty towel that didn't really stay on, nor did it do a good job of covering me much. Here's the kicker though, usually in these dreams I'm annoyed or confused, but this time, I was unaffected. It was like wearing skimpy clothes for me, which I'm fine with. The wierd thing? It was in a crowded building with a lot of people I knew, and a lot more I didn't. There were 2 other girls in slightly less skimpy towels, and they were embarassed and crying. Does this mean I'm finally starting to feel like I'm pretty or something? -- And for thing number 2: I submit

[[http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=103220499696842 this old Facebook video of me]] (If it lets you watch it, I have no idea what my video settings are) ** Nope. Change your privacy settings. * [[AnsemRetort Pants are for the weak!]] * [[Tropers/{{AdamTheHedgehog}} This Troper]] [[OutOfClothesExperience Has had countless dreams of himself in the nude,]] [[InnocentFanserviceGirl often times not even minding it.]] This is probably due to sleeping in the same state, and the desire to be in the buff more often. The only real problem is that said troper lives in the upper-southeast US, in a particularly sub-urban setting. [[NakedPeopleAreFunny Thus, plaes are in the pipeline to join a nudist community once he rakes in the money for membership.]] In the spirit of the trope, however, This Troper often goes without pants within the house for the sake of pants chafing him. ---Go back to NotWearingPants. ''Please.'' ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NotWhatItLooksLike * Inversion: [[Tropers/{{Lioyd}} This troper]] is so utterly terrified of being mistaken for a pervert he generally avoids being seen watching ''anything'' involving an attractive woman. ** I feel the same way. * This troper's friend and his HeterosexualLifePartner snuck out one night to go skinny dipping. They had just made it back into his room and dried off (though they were still a little damp...) before his mom walked in on them both, completely naked. They freaked out and started to [[DiggingYourselfDeeper make up two different excuses for why they were naked at once.]] They're straight as hell, by the way, it just took a little time to convince her. * Averted by that hickey on my neck that my sister wasn't supposed to notice >.< The dialogue went as follows ** Sis: And then -- What's that on your neck!? ** Me: -Blush- That? It's a mark. [[DeathGlare -Stare-]] ** Sis: -Slowly goes back to what she was doing* This troper had fallen asleep in class, and when she woke up, she moaned. Rather erotically. It was just out of sleepiness but based on the looks she got from her classmates they didn't get that assumption. * Unfortunately this happens a lot with this troper and her family. Cue accidental [[IncestSubtext implication of incest]]. ---[[NotWhatItLooksLike Go back to--]] [[AccidentalPervert Oh, uh, huh. G-Go on, don't mind me.]]

NowDoItAgainBackwards * This troper once accidentally slipped on his dog while descending a dark staircase, tried to catch himself falling backward, and tore his rotator cuff. After two weeks of being unable to raise his arm without pain, he headed back up the same staircase one day, and the dog was once again resting on his usual step. He stumbled while stepping over the dog and caught himself before he fell on his face. And somehow fixed his shoulder in the process. As long as he keeps it active, it's fine now. * This trope is one of the staples of Swedish student plays. Audience participation is required and the audience can at any time request to see something again, in german, in the style of a wuxia film... and backwards is the perennial favourite of all audiences. This troper has seen song numbers, joke-telling and spit-takes done backwards. ** I really want to know, how does one do a spit take backwards? *** Well, ''TheReducedShakespeareCompany'' once did the drowning of Ophelia backwards by having the guy spit out a cupful of water, so presumably it would be done by splashing water on your face. ** In a similar case, our drama class was trying to improve a few students' horrendously dull performance. The first suggestion was to do a musical, which only the most [[{{Keet}} energetic]] of the performers did. Then this troper happened to pipe up with "BACKWARDS!" and said student did it backwards, singing in gibberish to make it even better. * Nerdy story here. While playing Halo 3, someone jumped at me with a sword, so I shot him with a rocket launcher. Someone else was stood right behind me so I said "Let's see that again in reverse!" They had enough time to say "wait, what?" before they went flying into the air in the same direction the other guy came from. ---- .[[NowDoItAgainBackwards selaT reporT sah elcitra sihT]] ---- <<|TroperTales|>>

NoWomansLand * My dad has strong views about what'll happen if a woman travels alone to Japan. The scenario goes like this: You get a once-in-alifetime job offer to go to Japan, they pay your ticket and everything, you get over there and realize that it was a one-way ticket only, the job is nonexistent, the company is nonexistent, you can't get home, somebody kidnaps you, and suddenly you're a sex slave. Or something like that. Told me that a lot when I was a kid. It came up again when I had the chance to potentially go to Japan with my college class, although by that time I had enough logic in me to refute it a bit (they wouldn't be having regular college trips to Japan if class members kept not returning). Didn't have the money to go, but anyway. I don't know how prevalent this stereotype is among people from his generation (he's slightly over 60) or perhaps from his life experience. Or maybe he picked up the idea somewhere and it's not typical of his peer group. But it's at least one example of how the

stereotype works. ** This troper thinks it's a protective parent thing rather than a stereotype of Japan. When she was in a long-distance relationship, her mother insisted that flying over for a visit would result in her getting lost and kidnapped into prostitution. The strange barbaric foreign land this troper would be visiting? [[FacePalm California]]. * This Troper's Mother views the entire Middle East as one big No Woman's land. ** So's everyone This Troper has ever talked to about trying to study Arabic in Egypt. The funny part is, this troper [[MistakenNationality can blend in with Arabs]] and can look not obviously female when trying hard enough, so probably wouldn't get harassed for being either a woman ''or'' a foreigner, but still gets treated like a defenseless little girl who can't go to horrible nasty Egypt for fear she won't come back. ** As far as I know...it kinda is. ** As far as I know, and I was there... it kinda isn't. *** I hear people say that. And then I think of poor [[http://www.csmonitor.com/World/Americas/2010/0507/Nazia-Quazi-caseencourages-Canadian-Muslims-to-speak-out Nazia Quazi]], who due to an archaic law that reduces women to property, could not leave Saudi Arabia [[WallBanger without her kidnapper's permission.]] *** The Error is in saying the ''entire'' Middle East it really depends on the country with some being far worse than others. * When [[{{Azzizzi}} this troper]] was in the Army in Korea, I was stationed on a base that had no women at all. The guy across the hall from me had just plastered an impressive collection of posters on his walls. The sergeant major stopped by for an inspection of the room and asked him to take them down because they were inappropriate. When this guy finally convinced the sergeant major that there weren't any women on the base to be offended, a female friend of a friend (she was a news reporter on AFKN and everyone knew who she was) stopped by my room looking for me. She stopped in the hall where everyone was standing, seeing the posters, she says, "Wow!" then asks if anyone has seen me. ** That's a good laugh.... but how is it this trope? * The reaction of this ethnically Japanese, but British-born troper's white adoptive father. He has made it very clear that he expects her to settle down [[MeLoveYouLongTime with a white man]], and while she was involved with a Japanese guy (her only boyfriend to date) frequently encouraged her to break up with him on the grounds that Japan has no laws against domestic violence, all Japanese men beat their wives and gamble away the family's money on pachinko, and that Japan is so backwards people keep farm animals in the house to kill for dinner. Before that she went on a couple of dates with an Iranian guy, which dad promptly put a stop to - after ''one date'' he was convinced the guy would force troper to convert to Islam and drag her to the Middle East to be enslaved by his evil woman-hating family! ** Wow just... wow ** I try not to bring it up, but when I was dating a German woman that was quite like her grandmother's view of England. That if you marry an Englishman and settle in England you'll have to accept being beaten

because they all do it and nobody stops them. * When I go to study abroad my mother reacted with fear that I will end sold into prostitution by and evil student-kidnapping mafia or abused by any love interest I may have in those barbaric land. The barbaric land? Marseille in France because of high rates of Muslim immigrants. Where do I come from? Ecuador in South America...Yeah. I absolutely love my country by I can't denied which country is more dangerous (not France). * This troper's mother tells her not to go out with an Arab, a Persian, or a black guy because she believes they're all abusive towards their women. * In many cases politics is a NoWomensLand. ---Don't go back to NoWomansLand, you poor mistreated little thing. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

NoYouHangUpFirst * [[{{Tropers/HG131}} This troper]] has done this in texts with friends many, many times.

NumberOfTheBeast * This Troper's school locker was once number 667. He was royally pissed at the fact that the locker next to his was unoccupied and he didn't know the lock combination. ** You should have taken advantage of the lack of occupancy and tried to crack it through whatever non-vandalism methods were possible, when they were possible. Or, at the end of the year, slipped a postapocaliptic note with details taken from Revelations through the door vent or edge. ** This Troper had locker number A667, and his best friend had A665, two spaces above his. It was never known to us who had the locker between ours. ** This Troper actually had locker number 666 and it was frequently "haunted" by her fellow nerd friends dropping pictures of the devil, [[{{Harry Potter}} Voldemort]], [[{{Star Wars}} Darth Vader]], political figures who they disagreed with, her brother (who is actually a pretty nice guy) and [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tx1XIm6q4r4 pipe bombs]] into her locker. * This troper and her sister once parked at a spot that was 666. We were like all 'omg! 666!' We were just fooling around though. * Just 3 years ago, back in 8th grade, we had a field trip to Geauga Lake on June 6th, 2006... aka ''6/6/06''. Quite a few kids didn't go due to superstitions. ** Holy shit, no way. This Troper had to fly overseas on 6/6/06. The plane didn't crash, but he did lose a pillowcase and some other stuff. * In the second episode of a ''FengShui'' PlayByPostGame that this troper played, the big battle scene where we battled a horde of Nazis, demons and zombies working for a mad Lotus sorcerer that were trying

to take a major Feng Shui site in 1936 Egypt went down on June 6, 2006, which apart from being 6/6/06 was also the 62nd anniversary of D-Day and the Invasion of Normandy, an important battle of World War II. * [[{{jketchum31}} This Troper's]] mother's phone number ends in 66680. This troper's phone number ends in 6-6660. Not telling you the area code, that would be cheating. This Troper's mother didn't realize her phone number contained that many sixes. [[IronMaiden This Troper requested it.]] * When playing card games with his friends, this troper ''always'' ends up with three sixes. It's kind of creepy. ** It must be because you are the DEVIL'S SPAWN BLLAAAARRGHH.(I am so, so sorry but I couldn't resist.) * The bus route that goes from this troper's home to the subway station is number 667. Next best thing, becasue there's no bus number 666 in Moscow. * [[{{Xaris}} This Troper's]] Christian friend's old cell phone number ended with 666. The irony was somehow lost on his devout evangelical parents. * [[MiniKaylee This troper's]] family had one of these occurrences. We were all at a sci-fi convention, and had gotten badge numbers in the 660s.My dad's was 665. So we're all looking at each other going, "Then who's badge #666?". We all looked over at my brother (whose name was after Dad's on the list). * I keep finding 666 around the place as funny coincidences. Every time I do, my friend calmly points out "The devils number is actually 616". One time I pointed out to my friend that the date was 6/1/06. His reaction was "Well... Fuck." * [[ThisIsATest This Troper's]] cousin used to work in a video store. (This is a true story, no lie.) He was putting some videos away, among them were ''Passion of the Christ'' and ''The Exorcist''. The latter's number was 666. The former's was 999, but it was upside down when he picked it up, so it read 666. As he picked them up, one of the upper shelves started to vibrate violently. Reportedly, he and the guy working with him sprinted out of the store and didn't go back in for a couple minutes. ** Additionally, a local news channel once had a pet tribute, with a phone number that ended in 7666. Get it? Number of the BEAST. * I have a customer, a computer guy, that has a business phone of ***5666. Weirdly enough, at least two thirds of his customers are ''churches''. He said, "If they have a problem with that, I really ''don't'' want to deal with them." * A few weeks ago I was at the gas station and bought a few snacks because I was about to pull and all nighter. The cashier rang it up and asked if I wanted to add something else because the total had gotten to 666. I just shook my head. * Last year, the numbers of the lockers around mine were: 664,665,[[SubvertedTrope 1066]],667,668. * [[{{Axioanarchist}} This Troper]]'s sister-in-law's father has (or used to have, I'm unsure) 666 in his license plate - and no, it wasn't a VanityLicensePlate. Said gentleman is also a former math teacher at the local high school. He enjoyed the coincidence far more than his

students (many of whom claimed to have reason already to consider him an EvilTeacher), and even turned down the offer to have the plate replaced/exchanged because it amused him too much. To elaborate slightly, this gentleman is quite religious on top of being a teacher, as is most of our families; most people would figure he'd recoil from the plate like it had the plague and demand a change. * This troper's first car's (randomly generated) license plate number was 5BDY666. His second and current car has the license plate number of 6___660. First it's a coincidence, second it's a conspiracy... * This troper has a nephew who was born June 6th, 2006. The father was very excited about this and thought it was cool. He seems to be a normal kid... so far. * This troper's brother found a vehicle mod for UnrealTournament2004 from [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=16XUHZ_-w4c Part 1 of this Youtube Video.]] Take a guess where this number fits in. ** I've (Same Troper) seen him play. It's a {{BFG}} vehicle with Phoenix bombs and can take out a core almost like a Leviathan. ** It's also called the [[{{Classical Mythology}} Cerberus]]. Take a guess at the symbolism. * This troper had a friend who's locker number was [[SubvertedTrope 1666]] in sixth grade. * This troper's name is this trope. My first, second, and last names each have six letters in them. I also have red hair. Make of that what you will. ** Other than the red hair same here!!! This troper's hair is auburnish, so it's just a bit red. * [[{{Nekoalexa}} This troper]] and her sister were playing [[MarioAndSonicAtTheOlympicGames Mario and Sonic at the Olympic Winter Games]] earlier this year during the big snowstorm on the east coast. Well, one day I was playing [[SuperMario Peach]] in the dream figure skating event. In this event, you play whatever character you choose, and there are three other characters that end up getting whatever score you get. When I finished the event, all our scores combined came out to ''exactly'' 666! My sister made fun of me for the rest of the night, until the next day, when she got the ''exact same thing'' on the same event! * This troper used to work at a pizzeria with the address of 666 S Main. Numerical superstitions were a constant problem because no one would enter the right number in their database. Mail send to 665 S Main and 667 S Main would go across the street, stuff sent to 660 and 670 would go to businesses on either side. And you want creepy? It was a dead-end, go-nowhere job! How much more evil can you get? * A recent marathon had a hilarious example: runner #666 wore a red velvet tunic over her running clothes, and a headband with devil horns. She was [[IncrediblyLamePun hot.]] * I once got 66.6% on an exam. A friend who [[EvilIsCool wants to be an evil overlord when he grows up]] was jealous even though I'm pretty sure his score was higher. * Not that [[{{Nyperold}} I]] believe it means anything in this context -- it's just amusing -- but just now, when I was playing ''VideoGame/PaperMarioTheThousandYearDoor'', I got to Cortez's ship, and hit the Recovery Block. My coin total? 666.

* In class, the teacher wanted me to find 80% percent of 833. When I told the answer (about 666, obviously) to the class, they did a collective gasp. Admittedly, I did a DoubleTake at my answer. * [[{{Fearmonger}} This troper]] once got a score of 66666 on GuitarHero. Not the song NumberOfTheBeast, though. ---Go back to page #24758923666; NumberOfTheBeast. ----

NumberOneDime * [[@/{{MiraShio}} I]] consider two of my LoveInterest's gifts to be this--a cellphone charm from Hong Kong Disneyland and a promise ring. I have even been said to take better care of the charm than of the phone itself. * This troper has a bizarre medallion type thingy about the size of a quarter with funny symbols on it that she found at the bottom of a swimming pool. She keeps it in a special small pocket on the arm of her jacket. * .....Special small pocket?! Dear gawd, that's where I keep MINE! Except mine is a lucky twopence. My granny gave it to me. I happen to be PROUDLY CANADIAN! So, no, I have no idea where she got it. ^^; * This stuffed [[{{Pokemon}} Pikachu]] I've had for years, probably since the age of 5. Earlier in life, it was my CompanionCube, which is probably why I hold it with such high regard that threatening it in any way is my BerserkButton. It's gone to the point where among my family and a few of my friends, it's my IconicItem. * I've carried around an arcade token from a (now closed) skating rink since eighth grade. My best friend gave it to me, and charged me with never, ever giving it away. I always joke about trying to pay with it, but I'd never actually give it up. It's a good luck charm and a reminder that, even after all these years, she's still my best friend. * [[@/DeathToSquishies This troper]] often treats objects, trinkets and gifts he gets from friends as Number One Dimes, especially the closer we are to each other. A recent incident involved him losing a [[SuperMarioBros Luigi figurine]] that his best friend from Canada had sent him in a Christmas package (among other things), and he spent a while freaking out about it until he found it sitting on the bus the next day. * [[@/ManCalledTrue This troper]] has, on two occasions, found a Canadian quarter in his change. It became "Queen Elizabeth", his good luck token. More recently, the dime in his hoodie pocket has taken on similar significance. ---Go back to the main page, but don't lose your NumberOneDime while you're at it. ----

NWordPrivileges

* Dear tropers, let me tell you about a college professor of mine. White as can be, utterly convinced of what may as well be an American conspiracy against black people. One day in class, she talks about how white people should not be allowed to say the word "nigger," which she has trouble saying herself. (As for me? I'm not white '''or''' black.) She is perfectly fine with black people being allowed to say it ... and as for people of mixed ancestry, as I asked her casually after class? "It depends on how they are integrated into society" ... which sounds a lot more meritocratic than anything else she's said. Because up to that point, she sounds like she is essentially saying that [[BrokenAesop people of certain skin colors should have special privileges that are not available to people of differing ethnicities]]. ** This light-skinned black troper was told, point-blank, that she did not have N-Word privileges and never would due to her [[ButNotTooWhite lack of melanin]]. She's not too broken up over it, since she really hates that word, especially when it's applied to her. * This troper has an African American friend... who's white. Her family is South African, and we have many jokes about her being "black." Did I mention she's a lesbian too? Saying "nigga faggot" to a white girl outside our group of friends gets some odd looks. Even stranger is the "I'm a gay South African" excuse actually WORKS, despite the fact the only other white black person around here is an illegal alien... * This trooper had a room mate who INTRODUCED HIMSELF as. "A nigger from the streets. You ain't allowed to say that, okay?" Truth in Television SO much. * This troopers Senior class president elections were made much more memorable when one of the candidates opens up his speech with "Wussup mah yellow brothas? Chinks in da house!". Needless to say, but I say it anyway, he got disqualified (But NOT suspended IIRC. So the C-word privilege kinda held up.) ** Yeah, the head of the Jewish society at this troper's university was much like that. Eventually I explained that the real problem was the age of his jokes. It had some impact. * This troper had a FridgeLogic moment regarding this in high school: Two football teammates were throwing the "n-word" around casually. Since this troper was only half-listening, it took a moment to realize that '''A)''' the teammates were both white and '''B)''' they were referring ''to each other''. * This female troper and her girlfriends will casually say, "Man, why are you being such a cunt today? You on the rag?" The one time a male associate tried something similar, the temperature in the room dropped several degrees and the associate fled for his life. * This lesbian troper and her LGBT friends throw around the word "dyke" pretty casually, but don't take the word well when it is being shouted by 300lb+ old rednecks in pick-up trucks plastered with Sarah Palin 2012 bumperstickers. However, NOBODY is allowed to say the word "tranny" because hate-crimes against transgendered people is a very, very sensitive topic to queer people in our town. ** Also, instead of "that's so gay" we sometimes say "that's so straight!" And "No hetero" instead of "no homo." We typically don't do

this around straights. *** ... Sarah Palin 2012. Must be what all the end of the world prophecies for it are all about. :p **** Dude, "tranny" is offensive? I just figured that it was just informal, on the level of "black guy" or "gay guy". So is it more on the level of "faggot" or "nigger" or on par with "Negro", or "a black."? Could someone please inform me? **** 'Tranny' is a word on par with 'faggot' because idiots use it as a word meaning 'person who does something out of the ordinary for my social group'. Kind of like 13-year-old boys use the word 'gay' to decribe... well, everything. **** Huh. I always used to word to refer to automotive transmissions. No wonder I got weird looks when I described the tranny I mounted in my car last year. **** this TG troper doesn't mind the word tranny used, it's 'shemale' she finds offensive that said because a large chunk of my friends growing up were hispanic I gained the privileges on using 'beaner' 'spic' or 'wetback' in a friendly joking manner because as a lot of my friends told me "hey you're just one of the cholas chica!" ***** This TG Tropette doesn't mind tranny as well, unless it is spoken in an unfriendly way (then again, any word spoken unfriendly doesn't sound nice). She got herself privileges to call Polish, Russian, Turkish and Mexican friends around her by various N-word variants, as she was considered to belong. She herself gave the previous Tropette the German N-Word privilege (guess which word THAT is). ***** Original poster: Yeah, different people find different words to be offensive. It depends on the group you are in and the context. For example, I don't find the word "queer" offensive and use it all the time instead of "LGBT" which sounds too much [[TheColbertReport like a sandwhich]]. However, in the past few years, I have heard the words "tranny" and "she-male" and even "it" used against trans peopleincluding some of my close transgender friends- in a truly hateful, spiteful way which is why I personally hate the word and many of my trans friends find it offensive, even when said in "jest". In general, I would avoid throwing the word around in causal conversation unless a transgender person (like the above two posters) specifically says they don't mind it. * This troper is learning disabled. Back in high school, she was in a program that the students affectionately called [[FunWithAcronyms Stupid Teachers And Retarded Students]], and where most people have a brain fart, we had a 'STARS moment.' However, the moment someone outside of the program called one of us retarded or stupid, god help your miserable soul. Even one of the most nonviolent of the program, this troper, decked a [[JerkJock guy]] for an incident involving a short bus and had to keep everyone else in the program from wanting to beat the shit out of him for both insulting her and for the insult itself. * This Troper has a white, technically African friend(his father is Egyptian, though he's never lived there) who insists people can't use the N-word around him. Because he's black. HilarityEnsues as often as not.

* This Troper's uncle used to refer to any lapse in concentration as an irish moment. His aunt eventually got him to change it, by which time he was old enough to call it getting old. ** Come to that, all of you have at least one older relative who puts down normal failings to getting on in years. If you doubt it's related try suggesting they're getting old. * This, Mizrahi Troper was recently talking with his black (very dark) friend at the mall. We were discussing the Maasai, and I made an off hand comment about how dark they tended to be. Another black dude passing by leaned in and asked my friend if he'd allow me to make such racist comments. Without missing a beat, and in these exact words, he said "It's okay, he's Jewish, he's got his N-word privelages." And the strange thing? The other dude actually looked embarassed and APOLOGIZED. <.< >.> * @/{{Jonn}} was on Kotaku, reading a discussion on piracy, when some guy came in and started deriding all the "moralfags" who were against piracy. When people called him on it, he tried to use this trope, claiming things were "different" on "[[ImageBoards certain parts of the internet]]". It didn't take. ** There was also an occasion when he found a thread on GaiaOnline that was someone complaining that they got banned for use of the word "nigga"[sic]. Someone pointed out that the mods couldn't assume they were black just because their avatar was. It turned into an extended wank about the difference between "nigga" and "nigger". (PROTIP: There isn't.) ** I once commented on a post about ThePrincessAndTheFrog, mocking a video, made by a black woman, which called the film racist for daring to portray a black girl with a little "badonk-badonk". Someone's response basically called me racist. I mentioned that my mother and sister were black, with the obvious implications for my own skin color. They never responded. Textbook example. And in case you were wondering, I ''never'' use the N-Word, and only rarely swear at all. @/{{Jonn}} ** There was also another post where I said that a magazine named "Bitch" seemed like it was trying to be edgy. Several of its readers took offense, and said that the magazine was trying to "reclaim" the word. Given what happened to the last time a word was "reclaimed", (hint; look at what page you're on) I didn't say anything. ** On the one hand, it's true that throwing "Xfags" around all the time is commonplace and not treated as offensive on ImageBoards (y'know, in case anyone reading this didn't know that already...), so if he'd just slipped up ''initially'' then habit would be an acceptable excuse. On the other hand, that really isn't NWordPrivileges unless the poster and/or the board's general population is gay, and also it's rather rude and not very sensible to try and tell people they shouldn't be offended because the other people you hang out with wouldn't be. Which sounds like it's closer to this guy's line of logic. *** Apparently he didn't realize that the use of "-fag" is done on Image Boards in a deliberately ironic fashion. Not "funny" ironic, unless you have a certain sort of mentality. Just inverting this trope by "giving" everyone said privileges. [[MoralDissonance I even saw

someone describe themselves as a "Christfag" once.]][[hottip:*:The dissonance is both in the fact that they use the word "fag", and in the fact that they claimed to be a Christian yet were using [=4chan=]. [[HypocriticalHumor Ironically]], I read threads from [[http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=AlchemyQuest the /tg/ archive]], but try and ignore the bad parts.]]-- @/{{Jonn}} *** [[SarcasmMode Yes, because everyone on 4chan are Rapists, Pedophiles, Psychopaths and]] [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking Weaboos]], some of us are just geeks who like to read funny DungeonsAndDragons/Warhammer40000 stories on /tg/, I can't see how that prevents us from being Christians. **** Speaking as one of those geeks, me neither. I was talking about the use of "fag" in anything but an academic or quoting manner. Not exactly loving or tolerant, the way [=4chan=] uses it, and I wince every time I see it. * [[@/ThirtyTwoFootsteps This troper]] has studied enough Japanese to know how harsh the term "gaijin" is, and so insists that Japanese speakers do not have G-word priveliges. He'll accept the neutral term "gaikokujin," but only if it's said to him outside of America (realistically, you can't call someone a foreigner in their own country... not that more prejudiced people won't try). * This troper's Nakama are a fairly mixed bunch, resulting in the Caucasian members being considered to have "stamps on their Nigga card" to represent N-word privileges, though misusing slang or being ignorant can result in having the card temporarily revoked as "Negrobation". (It's gotten us weird stares, and kicked out of a mall once) * This troper likes to constantly remind our lacrosse team (Which is ENTIRELY white and has no diversity and often practices far away from anyone else) That we can say whatever we want with no repercussions. * Back when I was young and really stupid, I didn't know what the word nigga meant or what Punch-Out was, so I thought that [[MemeticMutation Nigga]] was Doc's name. Yeah... * This Troper's brother declared he was offended by the word 'gay' and took defiant pride in calling himself 'faggot'. Of course telling me that didn't necessarily grant me the "F-word privilege". On the other hand, the word 'queen', much like 'bitch', can be either an insult or a term of endearment, and I'll even call straight men 'queen'...especially if they're acting like one. * [[QueenOfTheBifauxnen This Troper's]] friends, family and one occasion, lecturer, all use the word "dyke" jokingly towards her, and no offence is caused; in fact, she kind of encourages it. * This fag troper learned the hard way that people can't tell your sexual orientation just by looking at you and saying "fag" in hearing range of a teacher is a bad idea. * This Japanese troper regularly uses "Jap" to describe himself and his buddies, and as he for whatever weird reasons doesn't look very Japanese, always gets in trouble for it. ** "Jap" as a racial slur has always bothered me. For pretty much every other minority their slur is more complicated than "I don't feel like saying the whole word". My friend and I got a severe tongue lashing when we were overheard using the word Jap liberally simply

because we were using the word Japanese a lot and didn't feel like saying the whole word. Just one of life's many examples that trying to be efficient will just cause more problems. * My friend (a white girl) actually got NWordPrivilages from a black friend. She and ONLY she could call him nigger and get away with it (he got to call her a Cracker Bitch in exchange). Everyone else got to call him Hershey (which I guess is also N-word Privilages, except with a less offensive word). ** In addition to the above, we both had a gay friend who actually encouraged people to call him fag. * This Dutch troper has absolutely zero qualms about using slurs and making fun of race, creed, religion, disability and sex, provided the right environment is given and people know that you're joking around and understand their situation. When a person unfamiliar with the no holds barred environment enters, he goes out of his way to ensure said person gets these conventions and feels comfortable in them, which can lead to a bizarre situation in which a political discussion about positive discrimination and essentialist fallacies can immediately switch to a barrage of through and fro taboo jokes. It helps if said environment is very diverse. * This Australian troper is the sole Irish descended person in his group of friends. Everyone else is Italian. He's got Wog (in Australia it's a slur for Mediterranean Europeans, not black people) privileges. Everyone else has got dumb/drunk/poor Irish privileges. * This bisexual troper and her LGB friends frequently use the expression "that's so GAY" when referring to something stupid/ridiculous, but are offended when others do it. * This Troper can say all the racist shit he wants to his black friend, on the understanding he will get the same back in "cracka" jokes. Watching an entire Burger King collectively shit themselves when I tell him "back of the queue darkie" is a sight to behold. * After a discussion on NWordPriviliges in my English class, I decided I was going to refer to myself as a Mick, but only other Irish kids could call me that. Subverted in that the teacher was the only one who knew what I was talking about. * This troper finds it incredible that so many tropers are stupid enough to use such infantile language to their so-called friends. Also, she finds it even more foolish that they don't realize they failed the test. If you're happy to use such language, your "friends" are mocking you behind your backs. ** Even then, not many end up taking it seriously after a while. Sometimes it is a lighter form of VitriolicBestBuds. ** In some cultures, having the right to insult your best friends and for it to be taken as a joke or in some other way harmless isn't 'infantile' and nobody is mocking anyone. It's a sign you're close enough to know what you can get away with and in most cases is harmless fun. Most of the examples on this list are most likely exactly that in action, and if you were to call out your friends for jokingly ribbing each other like that, calling them stupid etc, they'd tell you to leave. * A black friend at an old school of mine (wow, StockholmSyndrome much?) called me, and maybe ''everyone'' "nigga." One day, we had an

exchange like this: --->'''Him''': What's up, nigga? --->'''Me''': Not much, cracker. --->'''Him''': ...''What?'' ** We both laughed, by the way. About a year later, in a different school during black history month, a black classmate was reading a civil rights movement story and said he didn't feel comfortable saying the N-word. I informed him he had NWordPrivileges by default. The teacher called me out on this, and some of the students called ''her'' out on ''that''...and we had an interesting talk on the subject. I even told them the above story. * In this troper's country, the word "cholo" is used commonly as an offensive way to call people (though this has been reduced in recent years); among his friends and family, this troper (and them) uses the word in an affectionate way. ** Which region is it? The word "Cholo", at least in my city (North of Mexico), is a coloquial term for youth that live in gangs and do most unlawful activities you'd expect. Seems to be a fairly common word here, though. * The frontman for my brother's band likes to cover hip-hop sometimes. (He does an excellent version of A-Kon's "Ghetto".) Because he lacks N-word privileges, he uses "brotha"; it scans well enough, and even sort of rhymes as a drop-in replacement. Try it the next time you're at karaoke! * My dad is Japanese-American and grew up in San Diego; as such, most of his friends at school were Mexican. Also at his school was one white kid who "desperately" wanted to be 'in' with my dad's Mexican friends. So, one day my dad and his friends playfully greet each other in the presence of the wannabe kid: --->'''My Dad''': Hey, wetbacks! :D\\ '''Dad's Mexican friends''': Hey, Jap! :D\\ '''Wannabe kid''': Hey Jap! :D\\ '''Mexican friends''': ''Don't call him a Jap!'' >:( * beats wannabe up* . * Everybody at my school, middle school especially. I remember a notable incident in which an arabic girl upon seeing her favorite substitute (Who was white) shouted out quite plainly, "Oh! Mr. ***** This is my Ni**** !" It was hilariously racist. She didn't get in trouble. It seems N-Word privileges are automatically granted whenever you go to a school that prides itself on diversity. * Played absolutely, absolutely straight, and very often [[InvokedTrope invoked]] and [[LampshadedTrope lampshaded]], in this troper's 60% Asian high school. Asian slurs and (otherwise offensive) jokes are almost universally made by said Asians. Even better, we've been known to confirm some of the jokes after they're told. * After a few incidents of playing online with a microphone, this mexican troper has such an odd accent at times, he has been called all sorts of nationalities, both legitimately and perjoratively. After a while, just to confuse everyone else, he remarks them that he is not a black person, and that he is, in fact, a beaner, and that they should at least get it right. * When this troper's mother was in high school, there was a lot of

racism towards the Portuguese. Since there is no slur for Portuguese(at least, not to my knowledge), bullies opted for the term "Wop"(which is a slur for Italians) instead. Eventually those of Italian heritage stepped in, and the Portuguese were given N-Word Privileges. The two groups became close friends, referring to each other as "wop" until the bullies left them alone. My mother always tells me this story with a smile. ** This troper assures you that there are racial slurs for the portugese, but they're rather ineffectual in terms of impact as only a few regions know them. ** Pork-Chop is the only one this Portuguese trooper knows. Though somewhat subverted in that he's only heard his (Portuguese) Grandparents use it. * This black troper often extends NWordPrivileges to everyone he meets. The word doesn't really bother him or any other black person (about 70% of everyone he knows) when it used in a playful manner. As such he permits the use of the term to get people to loosen up. It seems the best way to fight racism. Not allowing someone to use a word because of their race seems kinda well...''racist''. ** As a side note, this troper's best friend is white. There is nothing quite as funny as the looks they get. ->'''Me''': Your too loud! Stop acting like a nigger! ->'''Him''': Don't be so uptight, honkey! The bewildered stares never get old. * This autistic troper often jokingly uses the word retard when a friend is being stupid. One time a woman started to lecture me about it being a hurtful word. My response? "I'm autistic, I have R-word Privileges" She had no argument for that. ** Subverted for this troper and his mother, cause we're both autistic and we believe NO ONE should use the R-word period. * [[StraightGay This troper]] has claimed "F-word" privileges. ** [[CompletelyMissingThePoint You mean faggot?]] ** Or "fartknocker"? Is that also a gay reference, or does it denote [[ToiletHumor intestinal distress]], or is it just a generic term for abject stupidity? * Yeah, I know this isn't really the same thing, but [[@/{{Kathadrion}} this troper]] lives in a small Swedish town that is much more famous across Sweden than the size of said town would suggest. Why? One of Sweden's most notorious mental institutions is located there. It's perfectly okay for inhabitants (and exinhabitants) of said town to make fun of that fact, but [[BerserkButton if anyone else does it...]] * This troper is enlightened enough to know that there is a difference between black people and niggers, as well as gay men and faggots. Of course, he's not willing to take the chance should he happen to strike up a conversation with any one of the four. * This Troper lives in a county where seeing a black person generally means they are a visitor, so all the teenagers are very racist (racist jokes told just about everywhere in school) because of this. This is a berserk button of mine, as I was friends with a black guy when I lived in London (I moved when I was about seven) and, as such, take annoyance that people insult others just because they don't know

better. If where I lived was typical, I'd pity the ethnic minorities everywhere...then again, that doesn't stop me telling jokes about the Irish and Scots and Welsh, leading to moments when my scottish best friend (who doesn't have an accent) has to remind me that he is scottish! * [[{{Tropers/Cosman246}} This]] troper is of Indian descent, and always makes fun of Indian government, movies, English, etc. when he can. Problems occur because the other one of Indian descent in my class is unaware of this trope. * [[{{Tropers/Luna87}} This]] Black troper cringes whenever she hears that word, especially when she hears other black people saying it. ** In addition, I hate when people use the word "gay" as a synonym for "stupid" or "weird." I'm also a member of an antiLiterature/{{Twilight}} group on Facebook, and it makes me cringe that the other members of said group feel a bit too comfortable about throwing the word "faggot" around. * There was one interesting case of a white person being given general racism privileges by a group of black friends in World of Warcraft. The white friend put together a 40 person raid which included his five black friends who had given him permission. The entire raid was a "segregated run" and the five black players were forced to stand at least forty yards from the rest of the group or they would be kicked out. This forty yard radius was even enforced during fights where you were all but REQUIRED to all gather together, making the entire thing more complicated. The white leaders dedication to kicking anyone who got too close, and the good nature with which the black players took it (finding the whole thing hilarious, not the least of which the reactions of the other players) meant they completed the whole thing though. * This troper is a white, blond, straight, conservative Christian male from the American South; yep, part of the richest overlap on the Venn diagram of AcceptableTargets. He also thinks that the concept of "reclaiming" hurtful words is utter bullshit. Whenever someone talks about using words like "bitch," "nigga" or "faggot" as terms of empowerment, I always ask "Really? So you're saying that if I called you that ''right now'', you'd feel proud instead of offended?". Since pop culture considers me the universal "evil oppressor" archetype, the response is invariably no, so I point out that they're not even close to "taking back" anything yet. When the group that minted the term to be abusive no longer has the power to hurt people with it, the word has been successfully taken back. Until then, it remains a term of degradation no matter who says it. Anyway, that's my two cents. ** This troper disagreesthe previous troper doesn't get to define what "reclaim" means (especially in his self-professed AcceptableTarget-ness). ** Alright, first off: I reserve the right to define whatever, however I want, but that's a moot point because "To remove the hurtful qualities of" seems to be the go-to definition people have in mind when they try to "reclaim" words, and I didn't make that up. Second, nobody's been able to successfully pull it off yet; that part's not even a matter of opinion. Words aren't intrinsically good or bad, but some of them have been abused for so long that the negative

connotations are too hard to shake off. So instead of keeping the terms around and using idiotic rules and hypocritical double standards as to how they should be used, maybe we should consider confining such words to the dustbin of history and moving on. * Kinda funny tale of this troper. I was at a [=McDonalds=] when I swiped my debit card and it didn't read. Cue me yelling out "THAT'S SOOOOO GAY", when I was called out by a guy behind me who may or may not have been gay himself, saying that word is offensive to other gay people. Panicking, I thought I could either lie and say I was gay or try and defend myself(I also could've apologized but that was one of the few times the option didn't occur to me). So I opted for the latter, saying something to the effect of "Nonono you misunderstand, I didn't mean gay as in homosexuals, I meant gay as in lame, or stupid, because by all means this card should work I got like twenty bucks on it. It's completely different, like [[{{Futurama}} discrete and discrete]]. Think man, what do homosexuals have to do with my card not working. That's some controversial thinking, and I'm an American" There was an awkward silence, then I just paid in cash and apologized. The food was delicious, in case you were wondering, I got a McChicken. ** Slightly more serious note: I as a black troper have no problem with anyone using the "N-Word", as long is its not used in an obviously racists manner, and even then I kinda laugh it off. I do find it a bit upsetting when black people are quick to get mad at white people for making jokes at their expense, then turn around and do the same thing to them, all because of things their ancestors did to their ancestors. I once saw on a show(or movie, I forget) where a white guy said 'nigga' while listening to rap music, then a bunch of black guys beat him up for it, and this was PlayedForLaughs, but to me it kinda looked like a hate crime (I still laughed but I laugh at all matter of fictional cruelty if it's done right). Sometimes you just gotta let shit go, racism and slave owning was a dark time in this country, but bringing it up isn't making it any better, especially when you are bringing it up to people who only have a passing connection to such things. To me it just makes those black people seem pathetic, trying to gain sympathy off of others misery. Personal example, my mom died when I was a little kid, and yeah it was sad, but I don't go around using it as a conversation starter, or to gain sympathy when I'm pissed(okay I did once, but I felt such terrible shame afterwards, I never did so again). I even try to avoid bringing it up at all cost, going as far as just going along with whomever thinks is my mother at the moment. So yeah, to me, whenever someone brings up the slavery/civil rights card over superfluous things, they are disrespecting all those who were slaves/civil rights activist and sub-sequentially fought for their freedom. If we gotta point the racist finger to someone, let's do it to those that are genuinely racist(or prejudice at all for that matter) to the point of being a threat, and make sure they are held off until they all die off so that future generations can truly all have peace and equality. Sorry for the rant. * In my group we all make fun of [[AcceptableTargets Asains, Hispanics, Russians, Polish, Jews, Christians, whites, gays, and Crossdressers and Irish and otakus]] We may seem like the most evil

group in the world... but we are all these things. Also This troper, the CrossDresser, can say shim, (she-him) and so can any [[{{Nakama}} friends]], but [[AmbiguousGender she's (they think)]] ready to pounce on anyone else who calls her anything along those lines, and any of their friends ** Weeaboo's though, *psshhh* * An amusing anecdote: I went to visit a friend in a black neighborhood, and made a trip to a little grocery around the corner. Said friend was eating a lot of candy to help him quit smoking. The girls had caught on to this, and were always asking him for candy, so he was going through a lot of it, and he asked me to pick up some more for him. When I dumped my handfuls of candy on the store counter, a little five-year-old said, "Look! That nigga got lots of candy!" Did I mention that I'm white? The shopkeeper and I cracked up laughing, while the kid's sister was yelling at him...."What? You crazy!" * This troper is straight, white, cis, middle-class, American... you know, the kind of person that never gets NWordPrivileges. I do, however, claim M Word Privileges, as a member of an unpopular religious minority. My friends and I call each other "you stupid Mormon!" or similar things... but if you are not Mormon and use religious slurs towards us, prepare to have a Religious Tolerance Anvil dropped on you. I had one friend that was allowed to make mean Mormon jokes, but there was an acceptable/unacceptable line that he was careful not to cross. * [[SlvstrChung This Troper]] accidentally forgot to invoke his NWordPriveleges on a LiveJournal advice community whilst giving advice to a fellow Asian about driving on the freeway. There was a certain amount of backlash--especially since this troper rarely signals his Chinese descent over the Internet, feeling that he has assimilated enough (born here, raised here, spent a grand total of 19 days in China over the course of my ''life'') to count as a bog-standard American. * I found a list online listing 170 relationship Red Flags. If one's boyfriend matched just two of them, the listmakers advised readers to get out. One of them was the use of "bitch" as a term of endearment. Aside from the fact that different couples have different boundaries-I live in England, and the swearing I hear every day would make "bitch" seem like something from a Saturday Morning kids show-[[http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/manipulator/redflaglist.shtml the list itself]] was compiled by "Heartless Bitches Intl." (Incidentally, it also has a serious NeverMyFault attitude. Several red flags are, basically, just admitting his problems early in the relationship.) * This Troper has an [[Ambiguously Brown]] friend (he's Samoan) who uses this always greets me with "(My Name), my Nigga!" and constantly uses the N-Word. Cue frequent and occasionally heated debates between the two of us on whether a Samoan is "black" enough to have N-Word Privileges (I'm latino, in case you were wondering)... * This English troper of Irish descent often addresses his friend of Saudi descent as "the college's resident oil-monger". Said friend of Saudi descent often asks me to give him a pint of Guinness and show him where my pot of gold is. It works beautifully.

* This troper loves making fun of the Bible and all its inconsistencies, along with some church policies. She gets away with it because she's a Catholic who prays every night. * This troper constantly Refuges In Audacity and constantly swears because, in my own words, "it's hilarious". I say nigger all the time and others have said it's hilarious. Rule of Funny? ** ...no. *** NoJustNo * This Rroma and gay troper has no problems with "gypsy" or derivatives thereof, regardless of who's using them. This led to one of his friends assuming that he felt the same way about "fag," which ended pretty poorly for him. I'm a pretty weird case, thousgh, since I've also got trans friends that refer to themselves as "trannies" and Mexican friends who refer to themselves as "Cholo/a" with whom I've got N-word privileges. * This Troper, who is white, works with a relatively mixed bunch of people who all like to use various racial epithets when they're talking and joking around. One time, this troper was asked why he never used any of them too (despite also being well known for pretty much [[TheQuietOne never saying anything ever]]), replied, "Well, I'm white. I'm not allowed to be racist." * You know, everyone ''used'' to be allowed to use the N word. White people just abused their chance, so they got it revoked somewhere during TheSixties. * Being a straight white middle-class American male with no issues of sexual orientation or gender identity, I clearly can't use certain words. OK, having Irish and German blood in me allows me to say "mick" and "kraut" among others like me, but if I said a certain racial slur for, say, Latinos, I'd expect to get my ass justifiably kicked for being a fucking racist (though I have in the past had the S&C Incident where I made a racist comment involving both Latinos and Asians just as a Puerto Rican girl walked out of one room next to me and an AsianAmerican boy out of the other). But then there's the Asperger Syndrome, giving me "A-word Privileges" that allow me to make jokes and comments about the autistic. Like, when discussing online fandoms with a friend, the subject came to [[FurryFandom furries]] and worse. There was one particular group, I forget which one, and they acted really weird. On certain kinds of websites they even refer to these kinds as "autistic", though to what extent the group overlaps with the actual autistic spectrum is unknown to me. I made the comment "Contain the autism!", then had to explain this trope to my friend. * I went to a pretty diverse school district, with a student population that was very black and very Jewish (though not, as someone once asked, at the same time. That would have been awesome). There the N-word (or J-word or C-word or Z-word) privileges were pretty well defined as belonging within that group or, in certain cases, a similarly persecuted minority (such as Mexicans for the N-word, because the Mexicans hung out with the black kids and were, for all intents and purposes, "black"). My Jewish friends make jokes about Jews and money ''all the time'', but I don't think I've ever heard a non-Jew make that kind of joke, and if they did, it wasn't well received. I'm half Jewish and half Irish Catholic (officially fully

Catholic), with a ''lot'' of religious joking going on at the dinner table, so I tend to claim privileges for Jew and Irish/Catholic jokes alike. **That being said, I'm not used to being in a non-Jewish environment, so when I went to college and found that almost all of my new friends aren't Jewish and haven't been around many Jews either (one can't recall even ''meeting'' a Jewish person before), there was a bit of a culture shock regarding which jokes were appropriate and which weren't. One friend got offended when I mentioned that someone's large nose meant they were probably Jewish. Another time, a friend directed apologies for her negative view of the Bible to a particularly Christian (as in Evangelical) friend while me and a Catholic friend were in the room. I loudly complained that she hadn't apologized to us as well, because, as Catholics, it wasn't as if we were "Jewish or something." The friend laughed hysterically, because the less-Jewish people around me are, the more-Jewish I present myself, but I realized later on that it probably sounded incredibly racist to anyone else within hearing distance. Given that a) we were in a cramped, thinwalled dorm, b) despite my previous statement, I only advertise Jewish-ness if it's relevant to the conversation, the number of people who misunderstood was probably a bit higher than I'd like. * ...Does this mean that white people get H Word Privileges and C Word Privileges for the words "Honkey" and "Cracker"? * You don't get to say "HOW!" "Smoke-um peacepipe" or "redskin" around me, Unless, your an American Indian yourself. I've joked around a bit with myself on the "ancient wisdom" of American Indians, of how the "white man" wouldn't survive without my ancestors. But if such a joke were made from the outside, "you get beat-um up." ---Yeah... no. Time to go back now. Your NWordPrivileges have been revoked. ----

ObfuscatingStupidity The trope is '''Deliberately acting stupid in order to mask your true intelligence.''' If you do this, or you know someone who does, feel free to write about your experience here. Entries that are not examples of the trope will be cut. ---* This troper grew up being called a moron/idiot/generally stupid by her father on a regular basis, so when I turned 14 it kind of turned into a 'Oh, you want me to be stupid? Fine, I'll be stupid.' kind of thing on my part, so I proceeded to pretend to be mute and incapable of performing any task more complicated then opening a door, feeding myself or bathing myself...no offense to any actual mute people out there. On the other hand, I got one of the highest scores in my district on a statewide test twice, and I've been known to rant about Freud and Voltaire during class. I'm an odd little girl. ** Is your name [[FruitsBasket Kisa?]] ** If it was, I think my Otaku friends would glomp me and never let me

go. * This really comes in handy for me. My boyfriend is...not the brightest and I'm closer to the top of my class so occasionally I'll pretend I have no idea what he's on about. It gets a laugh out of him, thinking he's smarter. * This Tropette saw a guy playing Super Meat Boy at school. More specifically, the penultimate level, Omega. He didn't know this at the time (and still doesn't), but I had spent the morning before leaving school (and several days before) trying repeatedly to beat it, finally succeeding before leaving. I went up to him, and every time he made a jump, I was all "oh shit you're not going to make it", and "you're going to die, you're going to die!". After a while, he got annoyed, and said "If this is so easy, why don't you try?". After I started, I immediatly asked how to play, so he told me how to run and jump and stuff. I beat Omega on my first try, then immediatly added insult to injury by saying "This game is fun, what's it called?" * [[@/StarePris This Troper]] occasionally does this. ** [[Tropers/CabbitGirlEmi Me too!]] In fact, A LOT. :] ** [[@/{{Angenesis}} This Troper]] is pretty much the same, only male. * I do it because it's fun being a CloudCuckooLander, walking around class quacking and then quoting Shakespeare and acing spelling tests. And correcting people's grammar. * This troper developed this as a defense mechanism during her late elementary-early high school years, though now just does it out of fun/habit. One of my friends used to badmouth me behind my back because she was jealous that I had better grades than her. Since then, whenever I interact with others, I act like a mild version of [[TheSimpsons Ralph Wiggum]], as opposed to her real, [[WideEyedIdealist wide-eyed idealistic]], CloudcuckooLander, BunnyEarsLawyer personality. * [[@/{{Xkun01}} This Troper]].This is pretty much my default state of being.To most of the people I know I am the [[TheJester clown/comedian]],able to make people laugh,who seems more or less think i'm an idiot.The best example,was a time,where I was saying I hardly knew much about the world around me.Then during a political discussion with some friends of mine I brought out cold facts and details along with counter-arguments to their arguments.To this day,they still aren't sure if i'm smart,average,or dumb.[[BrilliantButLazy Definitely lazy though]]. * This troper does this to one of her friends, only to keep the idiot/genius dynamic that we have. The best part? My friend ''knows'' it. * This troper doesn't act ''stupid'', per se, but he acts generally less aware of the world than he actually is. He likes to go off on {{Cloudcuckoolander}}-esque tangents to keep up the facade. It's quite advantageous, really. Besides, there's nothing like awing a bunch of people who think you're a complete idiot. * This Troper does this primarily to disguise the fact he's a complete asshole. Remember kids, it's better that people think you're dumb than they think you're a jerk. Plus, you can scheme and they won't expect it. ** This troper is exactly the same. I play dumb almost on instinct--

when a person is floundering around for a word, for example, and I know what that word is, I often hold it back because it's more fun to watch them finally remember it on their own. Does that make me a sadistic bastard, I wonder. * This Troper is pretty much made of this, with a bit of Cloudcuckoolander thrown in. I plan out everything that I do in advance, but I'm known for never thinking before I speak and lacking common sense. I'm graceful, but known for being clumsy. I'm relentlessly observant, but I like to suddenly say, "Whoa! When did that river get there?" and look shocked. I do this most during school, though it's handy outside as well. I'm known for never studying, drawing turtles and zombies all over my homework, and raising my hand only to go off on a long story about some stupid thing that I did. But apparently I'm really smart, since I'm acing my classes. I react to my grades by demanding shiny star stickers from the teachers and skipping around to show everyone my shiny hand. This is a very practical thing to do, though. If I acted my intelligence, I would be put in more challenging classes, and I don't want to be challenged, except in English, French, and German. If I'm challenged in my other subjects, I won't have time to write. * This troper is still unsure whether a girl he knows is this, a {{Cloudcuckoolander}} or a GeniusDitz. She often seems rather naive and has a tendency to be rather impulsive, as well as coming up with ideas that don't always make much sense. However, this troper has had complex discussions with her about various (admittedly usually strange) subjects such as the effect of chocolate on brain chemistry, and she did score rather well in most subjects. Overall her behaviour suggested that she either was very knowlegeable on some fields, yet completely clueless on others, or that she was just pretending to be less intelligent that she actually was. * This troper's friend sometimes pretends not to know what sexual terms mean for fun. Considering that she swears like a sailor, it's a jarring contrast. ** This troper also likes to pretend she doesn't understand all the dirty jokes her friends are telling her, because she knows they all think of her as TheIngenue. But every now and then, it's fun to surprise them. * This troper likes to use this to mess with people - the long blonde hair and large chest make people think she's a dumb blonde, which is reinforced by a smiley demeanor and a tendency to giggle a bit. The big thick fantasy books, habit of referencing anything to either computer tech, psychology, or [=DnD=], and the sadistic sense of humor tend to confuse anyone who takes her for an idiot. It's ''fun''! * This troper plays the Obsfucating Stupidity to such levels that he is a {{Large Ham}}, yet people are surprised whenever he says something intelligent. * This troper will often act oblivious if he guesses something before being explicitly told. ** This troper does the same thing. It's pretty much the only way he's been able to maintain some of his friendships. * This troper has used this trope to its fullest since childhood, especially with his family, to avoid pointless/needless trouble and

work. It's always priceless to do the reveal in a classroom where everybody thinks you're slow, though, just to watch the look on their faces. * Everyone but this tropers' friends family think I'm an idiot. I'm not. * This troper's parents claim that in the general vicinity of second grade, his IQ tested out as somewhere around 130 (just short of the generally accepted baseline for genius status). No one believes this. I find it convenient to be part of this group, because it allows me the delusion that people's expectations are lower (which they are, unless you're my parents, which really hacks me off because those are the important expectations). Even so, I do have to admit that I am a fairly smart guy even though I tend to Cloud CuckooLand a lot. * I deliberately play up the stupider aspects of my personality, partly because [[RuleOfFunny it's funny,]] and partly to cover up when I actually do act stupid. Although it frustrates me when people don't get it. * This Troper has been doing this kind of thing for several years. * This Troper finds it a very useful tool online as well as in real life. I'm an admin at a forum and have been for over a year, yet on [=MSN=], [=IRC=], and in a lot of my posts I come across as an idiot (and, as a bonus, StereotypeGay quite frequently.) So when I actually ''do'' bring the smackdown on errant assholes, it stuns them more that it's me who's doing it than anything else. * This trooper has slipped out of household chores AND crashing the boss's car by playing dumb, because everyone in the office underestimated me. * On the subject of George W. Bush: When he was running for election in 2000, this troper's family was at a political function where Bill Frist, among others, was in attendance. At the time Frist was a Senator and was also running the local Bush campaign, and the question came up as to whether Dubya was really as dumb as he sounds on TV. Frist, who knew the man personally, said he isn't and hinted that some of Bush's rivals had failed because they underestimated his intelligence and cunning. So there may be something to this allegation of TruthInTelevision Obfuscating Stupidity. * This troper has been doing this for years. It's better to let people think you're extremely forgetful when you're really BrilliantButLazy. *** Ditto here. It's quite hard to be lazy when all of your partners expect to give you all of the work and have you finish it all by yourself because "they would just mess it up". Better to pretend that you're barely focusing on the assignment and get a proportionate share of the work. Leaves more room for naps. * When this troper realized her best friend had been doing this for months, regarding (of all things) {{yaoi}}, she just about had a heart attack. Finding out your fifteen-year-old friend (who you thought was a prude) reads the same 18+ yaoi manga as you is... well... a bit awkward. * Most of the time [[ThatWackyGerman I]]'m acting like a scatterbrained stupid lazy stoner with a very exaggerated german accent. I may be a stoner, but my accent isn't that strong, I remember things quite well, had quite good grades in school and I'm not as lazy

as people think. Playing dumb makes many things easier. * [[@/{{Seiryu}} This troper]] tried to do this in High School. People were completely convinced. Then someone figured out the student ID system, and consequently, figured out everyone's grades. Even then, people were not convinced, until some nosy bitch got into my backpack, and looked at the tests. *Sigh* Life is so much simpler when everyone thinks you're a dumbass. * [[@/AcrossTheStars This troper]] acts like a giggly girl for much of her existence, and while everyone knows she's smart, they think of her as more of a GeniusDitz than anything else (she has a truly remarkable talent for history, biology, and religion, as well as vocabulary). During her senior religion class, she never revealed just how philosophical she truly is. When she dropped by (informally) to discuss her senior project with her teacher, that teacher looked her straight in the eyes and said, "Shame on you. You've been holding out on me!" * This Troper? Actually known as 'Idiot' at school, being dubbed so by her best friend. I tend to lose all common sense at moments, and so generally act that way most of the time to cover up such instances. I believe I even have certain teachers fooled. I look forwards to their faces when they see my exam scores... * This Troper does it so she doesn't scare little kids quite as much. Or other people in her typically not-exactly-genius fandom, for that matter... And also just does it because she's lazy. * This troper is known as 'Loser' among his friends at the video games club he goes to. I go off on random tangents, I make extremely awkward comments and I act like a {{Cloudcuckoolander}} most of the time. But when it comes to actually playing, I make crazy gambits, I predict constantly and I'm considered one of the best players there. I also do this with schoolwork, mostly to shove off responsibility because I'm excessively lazy. * This troper uses a combination of obfuscating stupidity and obfuscating CloudCuckoolander-ness handling annoying/sucky people at work. It kind of helps that she has a cane and most people in her area think physical disabilities mean there are mental disabilities involved as well. * This troper uses Obfuscating Stupidity to play into the commonly held belief that brawn = stupidity... Of course, when people realize you can speak three languages and keep near perfect grades in the first year of high school, the effect is essentially lost... * This troper had a high school science teacher that was something like this. Of course, being a science teacher, no-one thought he was completely stupid, but most of the students (and probably a few of the other teachers) didn't seem to realise that despite the fact he came off as a fat, eccentric Scot who seemed more like a {{Mad Scientist}} than a teacher, he was a brilliant scientist- and teacher. * This troper always like to act a little more stupid than he really is, especially around strangers. In fact, it can get sometimes a little worrying how surprised even my close friends are when I come out with something intellgent or get high marks. * [[@/NeoSilverThorn This Troper]] is usually silent by choice, leading people to misjudge just how intelligent he truly is, to the

point of scoring a small Crowning Moment of Awesome during an argument with his creative writing teacher by pointing out to her that [[YouFailLogicForever statistics can say anything if you fiddle with them enough,]] and that just because "statistics say every house in the US has a computer" doesn't make it ''fact''. * This troper was known to be one of the smart kids and his elementary school, and was constantly besieged by requests for help due to it. When going to a High School out of town, my best friend agreed to keep the secret of my intelligence, and I projected a new persona. No one pestered me for help with their work any longer, and by not speaking out loud in class, I was seen as a quiet, somewhat strange student with average marks. However, this was all shattered in my eleventh year of High School, when my English teacher refused to accept my reasons for hiding my intelligence. He "accidentally" let it slip that I had completed reading our novel for the next few weeks, as well as the forty assignments that came with it, by the day after the book was assigned. I was now once again besieged by help from people whom I had never considered friends, and forced to speak out loud when it came to class discussions. Although my English teacher was a fantastic person otherwise, I have never quite forgiven him for revealing my secret to the school at large. * I have known this girl since freshman year. She's been in a special behaviors classroom because of her self admitted habit of throwing fits (she got better though). She's kinda pudgy and loud... and more then a little obnoxious at times. But she's a pretty bouncy and (overly) affectionate girl. She often complains about being dumb and untalented (most of us are in advanced classes), and she asks for help on simple stuff. However, I believe she's actually very intelligent, she's managed to figure out quite a few things that we've missed (none math related though), and I've seen some of her writing. She writes on a level that would make a professional author cry! * [[@/SummoningDark This troper]] knows a girl who is either really good at [[ObfuscatingStupidity this stuff]] or a straight CloudCuckooLander. She can, when told to do something in a particular way (and often in a way that clashes with what she had in mind), cock her head and say "Aww, little [NAME]" and go and do it her way instead. It's confusing. And awesome. * According to some, this troper does it so well he tricks himself into thinking he is more stupid than he is. * This troper tries to play the idiot, but it doesn't always work. That is to say people know I'm smart, but they still sometimes treat me like I'm not because of my unreliable grades. I guess you could say I have [[ObfuscatingStupidity Selective Obfuscating Stupidity]]. Actually, people are surprised when I know how to do anything, really. * This Troper does this, sometimes intentionally, sometimes not. I'm actually a variant; everyone in school thinks of me as the smartest kid in school, but I generally act innocent and naive when I'm not. Thanks to this, plus my sense of humor, This Troper sits next to the prettiest girls in my grade at lunch despite being only averagelooking. However, I do have a horrible memory and simple things do confuse me a lot. * This Troper, (who was born Turkish, raised Londoner) sometimes

pretends to not understand some Turkish words so she can listen to her loved ones complain (in Turkish) about people bothering them and tell said people to ''stay the heck away from my family/friend'' later on. She also, when talking to foreigners who don't speak English well, tones down her English so she speaks just as awkwardly as them so that they don't get embarrassed. * [[GwenStacyWannabe My]] best friend recently confessed to me that she's been doing this for ''years''. She's actually very intelligent, but she's also [[CloudCuckooLander a little whimsical in the brainpan]] and has been known to respond to questions like "Are you hungry?" with "I forget." * This troper has been getting honors in class since sixth grade, is almost invariably the teacher's favorite, can dissect a person's psych just by texting them for a bit and predict everything they do and they have done, learn every little detail about everyone's personal lives (from who's going out with who to who's tried to commit suicide and is on antidepressants), memorize entire poems just by reading them once, and [[TheChessmaster manipulate her classmates like chess pieces]], and no one suspects her of anything because she acts like she needs things repeated to her at least three times before she processes them. She's even fooled her family. People even try to fool her because she's 'so spacey' by doing things like hiding her stuff and talking about her when she's sitting right next to them just to see if she notices. She finds this immensely amusing. * This troper has been collecting rather rare marine corals, invertebrates, and fish for nearly ten years, but likes to play up the whole "Naive Newbie" facade in order to determine if a shop or supplier is trustworthy or not. Many a time he's walked into a pet shop selling a Panther Grouper (a very large predatory fish) and had the salesperson tell him he can keep it in a ten gallon tank with guppies. * This troper is really quite smart, but when you're in high school, it frightens most of your friends when you use big words they can't understand. And it makes people think you're a know-it-all... so it's better to pretend you don't know big words too. This troper also is very good at finding out things she isn't supposed to know (people really don't guard their secrets as well as they should) so when someone ends up telling her a secret, she has to fake the whole "(gasp)! Oooh! Nooo! Really?! Nooo! I can't believe it! I had no idea!" * This troper has been doing this since...always? His mother does not like people who are smarter or act smarter then her. I DO know a lot about things which she doesn't have a clue about and she doesn't want that, so I adapted. * This troper tends to act like a ditz around her friends. Then when they found out she was in the advanced math class, they thought the end of the world was near. * This troper can come across like this to an extent, but only until either (3rd-person deactivated) a) people ask me what I'm studying (Computer Science, Maths, Physics); b) someone says something or asks a question that prompts a weird-but-somewhat-interesting trivia outburst; c) people see that I'm just genuinely strange ("I wonder how

these people (i.e. those in the 6th form common room at the time) would react if an [[{{NeonGenesisEvangelion}} Angel]] attacked right now? Who out of this lot would make the best EVA pilot? What things in this room could concievably be a TARDIS?"). * This troper is often asked to do this due to his brother's/cousin's/nemesis'/visitor's constant antics. This would usually happen after a prank goes too far, and they have to hide it for whatever reason. Though I will usually only do it for the second and fourth people. * I use this to avoid unwanted social contact. While I am actually pretty oblivious to flirting (a guy once flirted with me for two years before I noticed, and by that time he had given up), on the rare occasions that I DO, it's usually because I really don't want this person to be hitting on me, kthx. On one occasion, a guy who thought I was 15 was hitting on me, and I just played the innocent country girl part as hard as I could. My oldest sister, who had been coming over to warn me about the slimeball, had to leave the room so she could laugh without blowing my cover. She told this story to many people, gloating over how completely I'd suckered him. I've also used this trope while working retail. * Acting idiotic is also, I've discovered, a good way to get information from people. If I act oblivious, people say things much more openly. ''[[MagnificentBastard And they never suspect me...]] [[EvilLaugh Muahahahaha!]]'' * This troper sat next to a completely inept friend in his computer class who seemingly had no idea what the hell she was doing. Myself and other friends would constantly just do her work for her, just so she would stop asking for help. On one of the last days, when the other people in our row weren't around and I was helping her with her newsletter, she suddenly turned to me and said, "You know, I'm not as dumb as everyone thinks I am. I've actually known what to do this whole time". She then proceeded to finish her newsletter before I was even half way through. I just sat there in complete shock for about five minutes. ** [[MagnificentBastard Wow!]] [[TheReveal The reveal]] must have been shocking... * This troper took an Economics class this semester. There was one student in there, an unbelievable stereotype of a redneck, was believed to be slightly mentally challenged by everybody else due to his inability to say anything that wasn't racist, sexist, ignorant, or just plain stupid. He made a higher grade than most of the class, leaving everybody (including the teacher) in utter disbelief. * This troper occasionally does this when she first meets people. They catch on pretty quick, since it's honestly kind of hard for her to hide her intelligence. * One of this troper's best friend is really smart, she always makes people underestimate her though, especially in school. She tricks her teachers and her mother into doing all her work for her, when she can probably do it all and do it well. ** She even catches her boyfriend out and calls him out and plays him at his own "ignoring" game. So proud! *Proud tears* I call it genius. She learnt well!

* [[@/{{endlessness}} This troper]] admits to doing that sometimes, specially when people want me to become free technical support/training/consulting, or when people are talking about a subject he's not interested in (or interested in getting away from a FlameBait). * [[{{Zero44556}} This troper]] Partakes in this sometimes, though, when it comes to math and the like I'm genuinely useless, I'm a genius when it comes to things that only come up in a conversation once in a blue moon...it's more useful than you'd think, actually, and, most of the time, [[{{The manipulator}} I can trick people into doing my work for me through careful usage of words, all without breaking the facade]]. ** A straighter example would be my grandmother, who tries to be humble, and makes herself looks foolish or doesn't catch things on purpose, in reality, she has a medical PH.D, and has over twenty years of medical experience, if you ask her something you think she doesn't know, she'd probably suprise you. * The [[Tropers/Dwessie]] does this! But I do this because I get really nervous around people, and then babble like an idiot. If I don't plan on possibly befriending them, they either get Stoic Dwessie, or this. And my BF has pointed out that I do this a LOT to avoid having to explain things, because that is my least favorite thing. * [[{{osakachan12}} This troper]] is known to do this. So far, only one person in my entire school knows how intelligent I can actually be. To most, I appear to be [[DumbBlonde a true blonde]], is a [[CloudCuckooLander cloud cuckoo lander,]] and never really lives up to my full potential, [[BrilliantButLazy even though if I wanted I could be skipping a grade or two.]] The only time at school when I actually get off my lazy butt is during tests, simply because [[{{Understatement}} I don't really want to be held back.]] I'm also very lazy when it comes to explaining, but that's mainly because I have this weird thing where I get sounds mixed up, sorta like dyslexia, but oral.And not to mention I have a lisp and talk very, ''very'' fast...Though I can talk perfectly "normal," however normal a southern accent might be. * This one does this because he feels it might get a cheap laugh... but it sometimes goes so well he starts fooling himself. That, or he's BecomingTheMask... * This troper is extremely guilty of this. She often puts on a facade that displays an academically impaired [[TheDitz ditz]], when in actuality, she's one A short of being on her school's A/B Honor Roll. * This troper is a [[CloudCuckooLander CloudCuckooLander]], but I can also say I'm very intelligent. The reason I act so stupid and ditzy is so I can be constantly unpredictable. I love seeing the expressions on people's faces, like when an English essay I got an A* on got read out to the class; or I named every episode of all five new Doctor Who series whilst being timed and beat every other person who tried it; or quoted long sections of Shakespeare word for word perfect. It's a lot of fun surprising people! * In a somewhat guilty example, this Troper once pretended that he couldn't possibly have done a little... ''[[PlayfulHacker Technical

Tinkering]]'' to a familiar fan site out of curiosity. The administrator later questioned me about it but I acted as if I didn't have a clue. I'm really not sure how that worked because I was pretty much the only one who could have done it. * I often pretend to be stupid for comedic effect. [[{{Hilarity Ensues}} Sometimes people think I'm seriously that stupid.]] * Everyone, even most of her closest friends, seems to assume that this troper is incredibly naive and oblivious (when in reality... [[CovertPervert not]] [[CrouchingMoronHiddenBadass so much]]). She's gotten so used to it that sometimes, she just [[TheChessmaster plays it to her advantage]]. * This troper does this very often. Most people who know me know that it's an act, since I have Honors everything and have a high GPA, so most of the fun is lost. Random people in public places however... * [[@/{{Seiryu}} This troper]] knows a couple people that do this. Notably, my best friend, due to his (usually correct) belief that people are uncomfortable around him when they realize how smart he is. Several times, I have been privy to that moment when people realizing that he is a lot smarter than he lets on, usually around the time they realize that he has a Master's in psychology at the age of 22, occasionally when someone lets him near a [[SmartPeoplePlayChess chess board.]] Seriously, the dude is ''vicious'' in a game of chess. * This troper sometimes does this, but only to a subtle degree. He has a ridiculously large vocabulary, but doesn't like to use all of it because it makes him sound pretentious and usually causes him to have to explain what he actually meant by what he just said. [[BuffySpeak Just saying things using very simple words]] simplifies things. Usually I temporarily stop doing this when someone has a word on the tip of their tongue and I know it. * Sometimes this kind of happens with me whether I like it or not. Due to the fact that I am small for my age,very very odd, shy and not much of a talker, the peoples I am friendly with will sometimes be slightly condescending to me (but to be fair, I don't think they realise this), or will consider me an extremely naive person who never swears. I have no choice but to play along. * [[{{Encrypted12345}} This Troper]] acts like a WideEyedIdealist CloudCuckooLander to hide his depressing KnightInSourArmor self. Just because I am fatalistic and cynical doesn't mean that I should worry others about my issues. It works a bit too well as some of my family members think I am naive and innocent. * This Troper would play this for comedic effect often, just 'cause doing dumb things is hilarious. Although, there are some people who thought this Troper was actually dumb(some girl at work seemed surprised that I went to University, because she didn't think I was that smart). ---Gosh, what does [[{{ObfuscatingStupidity}} this link]] do? ''Really?'' Wow... ----

ObjectCeilingCling * This Troper pressed a piece of bologna to the ceiling of his parent's bedroom when he was younger. It stuck there for about a month before someone scraped it off. There's still a discoloration in that spot to this day. * This troper stuck a penny to his sister's roof sometime last year. it's still there. * The ceiling of one of my school's science labs is covered in the remnants of the students' slime experiments. Sometimes they drip a bit. * This troper's 8th grade Social Studies class had a sticky-hand on the ceiling. You know those jelly-ish hands you can throw around and stick to stuff? A kid in one of my classes had them, and the teacher got pissed off, took the hand, and threw it on the ceiling. Good times. ** Those things are awesome! And the same thing somewhat happened to me as well, but it was rather my mom who was sick of me slapping that thing onto every surface I could find. So, she threw it towards the ceiling where it was stuck. And left a nice discolored spot after sticking there for a few hours. Har har. * Amperschwa once took a ball of rubbery thread and pulled off a few strands to throw upon the living room ceiling. They've been up there for two years and still are adamantly sticking due to the fact that they actually put up a fight as to being taken down. So now whenever anybody lays on our couch they tend to ask something along the lines of ''what's that blue thing up there?'' * There was a stairwell at my university that had a tea bag (the kind with a little tag on a string) stuck to the ceiling. From the little splatter marks around it, one would guess it was thrown while still wet. It was there the entire time I was attending (5 years), and it was still there the last time I checked (3 years after graduation). ** On the ceiling of this Troper's high school band room is an ancient wad of pizza dough. It has allegedly been there for 3 years. * This troper somehow stuck a squishy (and slightly greasy) rubber model of a human heart to his house's ceiling in the late 1990s. ''It's still there today'', in the middle of a tan stain about 15-20 cm wide. * When this troper was about seven she got a green sticky-hand from a vending machine. One day her and her (11 years older!) sister were playing with it in the kitchen. Now, our kitchen ceiling was abnormally high, with a long slope that connected the kitchen ceiling to the living room. The hand went up... And didn't come back down. It was up there for at least a week before anyone noticed... And it took another two before finally her dad had to use a ladder and a broom to get it down. * There was a group known for this in the cafe at uni where I hang out. Because there was no decent coffee around, everyone drank tea, and making the teabags do this was the reason their group was known as [[HaveAGayOldTime The Teabaggers]]. Part of the fun was watching the teabags dry out hours later and land in someone's chem notes or [[{{Squick}} bolognese]]. ** As a FirstPersonShooter fan, I can't help but snigger at naming a

group the ''Teabaggers''. * A few years back, sticky silicone balls became a fad in [[{{MiraShio}} Mira-chan]]'s school. Of course, said balls were subject to much throwing around, and to this day the ceilings of some classrooms still have a red or green splat on them, in some cases both. * This troper was cooking breakfast one morning at a BSA outing. He forgets what he was cooking, only that it involved butter. He was playing around while bored and managed to fling a piece of butter in a random direction and get it stuck to the ceiling of the pavilion I was in. When we came back the next year, [[CrowningMomentOfFunny it was still there.]] * [[Nekoalexa This troper]] has seen two examples at her high school. The one was when a classmate threw some sticky thing on the ceiling in our classroom. The other was after a game night we had for our youth group. We had balloons, and one of them got stuck at the ceiling. Oh, and this is ''still'' the same classroom I mentioned before (our classroom functions as a classroom and our youth room). Well, this one guy decided to get it down by throwing a ''nail'' at it! This nail not only popped the balloon, but also got stuck in the ceiling ''right'' where this troper's desk was! Needless to say, I was freaking out every day, worrying about it possibly falling and [[IncrediblyLamePun nailing]] me in the head! Eventually, it did come down, and thankfully it happened when no one was there. * In our band room, the area where our conductor stands was, last year, coated in about 100 pencils plus his favorite baton. Amazingly, several of the pencils AND his baton were his own fault. For the longest time, half a gummy eye was stuck to the ceiling of the Japanese room. As far as I am aware, its still there. There used to be other gummies stuck there. And whatever else bored kids in the back wold stick there when Huang-sensei wasn't paying attention. Most people would do this in the science department, if it wasn't for the fact taht they might get deluged in mold and water due to the leaky ceiling. * There were a bunch of chewy candies stuck to the roof of this troper's 7th grade classroom. To this day, she has no idea how they got up there. It required a chair and a large pole to get them down. * Taping stuff to the ceiling in [[@/SabresEdge this troper]]'s band camp years practically became a tradition. Dimes and quarters were common, although stories floated around about more exotic fare-people's wallets, people's ''pants''... ---<<|TroperTales|>> Llink back to ObjectCeilingCling. Good luck reaching it though.

ObliviousAdoption * It happens. This troper had a German Shepherd who actually ''kidnapped'' a kitten from a litter to raise with her puppies. She looked ridiculous with this tiny mewling kitten sticking out of her mouth like a living cigarette. (Despite being held in jaws that could shatter a beef bone, that kitten never was hurt.)

** Another troper has a similar tale: when the future troper was about four or five, a litter of puppies and a litter of kittens were born in the household around the same time. Mama Dog (an Airedale) kept stealing the kittens, putting them in with her puppies, then caring for the combined brood quite well. Needless to say, Mama Cat was ''not'' amused. A few years later in the same household, three litters of kittens were born around the same time. The mothers pooled the kitten care, with any mother happily nursing, washing, or otherwise tending any kitten in range. None of the mothers seemed to care who'd given birth to which kitten. * This Troper was adopted by her own pet cat. I was seven when we received her, and she immediately got the idea that I was a human "kitten" and needed to be looked after. This meant hissing violently at anyone who came near my bedroom, trying to wash my face with her tongue, and on one unforgettable occasion, guarding me for three days solid when I was bedridden with the flu. ** This Troper has a chronic illness and her cat acts exactly the same way. She also follows me constantly like a furry orange shadow and doesn't even snub me when I disappear away to college for weeks on end. Instead she just acts happy to see me. *** Cats are awesome, I don't know why everybody [[CatsAreMean thinks they're mean]]. * When This Troper was born, my cat acted the same way. * This troper knows of a neighbor of mine where the wife's sister died in a car accident and she had a baby girl prior to and no husband so they raised her daughter as one of their own they had two children prior to and only the oldest child knew about it the son was quite little at the time and he didn't know about it, this worked for quite some time as the biological daughter and the adopted daughter looked quite similar to each other, until one day I might have spread it and I regret it because I told one of my cousin's about it and presumably he told another friend and so forth so eventually it got to the point where the son found out about it he was about 14 at the time and he felt really bad that he wasn't told after all those years that she wasn't his real sister, I never learned how he dealt with it because by then they had moved away. ** Uh, I'm sorry, but have you ever heard of a period? ** Wait, wait I see it! There at the end! See! * Real Life Inversion. This Troper's ex-girlfriend was adopted, and was quite shocked to learn so because she had a ''striking'' resemblance to her father. * A former colleague of mine had the last name Makay and white, former-missionary parents. He was a dark-skinned South American, so it was pretty obvious he wasn't their biological child. Apparently, hilarity ensued when he tried to convince a nurse to let him in to visit his sick father in hospital ('you're telling me you're his son?'). * This gay, black troper sometimes worries about this if he and his white partner ever adopt. * This Caucasian troper has an Asian wife. We have adopted a girl from her homeland. Amusingly, mother and daughter look so much alike that people from that land usually believe that our girl is a biological

daughter from a previous marriage. * This troper has more than once, jokingly greeted her friends on their birthday with, "YOU'RE ADOPTED!" Imagine the shade of red when one of them responded with "It's funny, because I AM." He is. Oops. * When this troper's family found a barely-weaned kitten in a dumpster and took him in, our very maternal Blue Heeler took said kitten in and raised him, even trying to get him to nurse. Said kitten became her shadow, and was heartbroken when she died eight years later. He has very doglike characteristics, including meowing when someone rings the doorbell (his canine mama used to bark like mad - she was a living doorbell) and drinking water like a dog. Fairly recently, we got a puppy, who the cat gets along great with. The puppy has now been 'adopted' by the cat, and is learning catlike behaviors from him (sleeping in the windowsill, batting at string toys, lying down with his paws tucked under him, etc). Multigenerational example of this! ** ''[[HeartwarmingMoment D'awww!]]'' ---No, really, we aren't your parents! You should better go back to ObliviousAdoption amongst your kind. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

ObliviousGuiltSlinging * This troper used to pretend to be a girl online and became fairly close to his gaming group. I was one of the core members and hung around with them for years. After a while I felt horrible for keeping my status a secret from them and wanted to tell, but was afraid they'd be furious at me. Every single time they told me how much they trusted me and thought I was a good person turned into a knife in the heart. ** Very similar here; assumptions were made once upon a time and I genuinely liked being the person they thought I was. I ended up breaking the news out of a combination of guilt and ever-higher probability of it being broken for me (inadvertently, by one of the handful of people that knew me offline first and didn't know everyone else thought otherwise). The one person I told was ok with it, but I don't know if he's told anyone else or intends to. I've been afraid to go back for a few weeks, but I needed to tell someone. * This closeted transsexual troper has put up with this a lot, and assumes there must be other trans people that feel the same way. "You're a man, so you should be lifting this;" "I've always wanted to meet your parents, epecially your dad, because he would be your male role model -and you're a male;" "If you had boobs, I would be resting my head on them now, just so you know." All real quotes. ** Funny, those kinds of comments always made this once-closeted, now stealth transsexual troper want to [[BerserkButton cut bitches]]. Also, this may just be me, but that second one is awkward enough to sound like an intentional reversal of MostDefinitelyNotAVillain. Honestly, if this were fiction, I'd be suspicious. It's, like, one step above "Hey there, Stud! How about those manly male genitals you got, Mister Penis Mc Y Chromosome!" in terms of subtlety. But, well,

you know what they say about the difference between reality and fiction... *** They all sound awkward to me. * This troper is in the closet about liking girls, and is constantly being teased about when she will get a boyfriend, if she has a crush on any boys, etc., etc. * This troper was having a conversation with a group of friends. She can't remember how it got turned towards this direction, but one person started asking rhetorical questions of things we've ''obviously'' never done. One of them was, "Have you ever had sex with your parents?" Guess what happened to this troper when she was six. (Thankfully, it was just her father.) ** ...If he's not underground already, can you give me the current location of your father and any high buildings nearby? I'll take care of the rest. *** I'll help. *** Now, don't kill the dude...there are much ''better'' ways to [[NightmareFuel deal]] with [[CompleteMonster people like him.]] Forgiving, Christian ways, [[FalseReassurance of course!]] *** Let us [[KillItWithFire pray.]] **** [[AxCrazy Amen.]] *** [[MindRape Hallelujah.]] **** Dibs on the liver. * This troper gets this quite a lot, as she does not feel like she is as kind, funny, honorable, trustworthy, or smart as some people claim. Regardless of how true their (or my) perceptions of me are, it leaves me feeling guilty. Although the worst case scenario was when I went into a HeroicBSOD in high school and skipped school repeatedly. A teacher once called my parents asking why I hadn't been in class. My parents responded with confusion, and his response to them was "oh, well I'm sure she just wasn't feeling well and went home--she's not the type to skip school!" I felt ill for a while afterwards. * This troper recently revealed to a friend that she is [[BiTheWay unsure where she stands on the Kinsey scale,]] but resolved to keep it a secret from everyone else. A couple days later, a different friend talked about how she'd react if someone - let's say me (hypothetically, of course) - came out to her. Days after ''that,'' I got caught up in a discussion about whether people could "become" bi, or just realize that they were. And then I was sitting at a table with some people who were practicing their (not-too-stellar) Spanish skills. One boy jokingly asked another; "Te gustan chicas?" ("Do you like girls?"), then asked the third boy at the table. Then, after a pause, he laughed and asked me. I made an amused face and waved the question off, but this was all in the space of a week. It's ridiculous. * You try having someone hug you and cry on your shoulder after her boyfriend left her for, unknown to her, you. (I swear it wasn't [[Tropers/{{MiraShio}} my]] fault.) ---You're such a great pal, you'd ''never'' go back to ObliviousGuiltSlinging without me, right? ----

<<|TroperTales|>>

ObliviousToLove * This troper is definitely this. She is more or less observant to her friends' love lives, but is totally oblivious should anyone be crushing on her. It doesn't help that even when it's made obvious, this troper pushes it aside because [[ICantBelieveAGuyLikeYouWouldNoticeMe she thinks they're joking around with her]]. ** Same here, gender-reversed. Apparently, my best female friend has had the hots for me for over a year now, and I never noticed. ** Are you me? ** Don't remember putting this up here? * Though there were constant {{she is not my girlfriend}} moments, and [[EveryoneCanSeeIt everyone could see it]] he still didn't seem to notice. When someone went up to him and said "Ask Troper about the guy she looovees." He just replied "what?" and blinked. He just didn't get it. * It's happened to me on several occasions. I'm used to getting teased, and alot of times when a girl genuinely likes me I think she's blowing smoke or messing with me. A girl I've been talking to as friends for two years had told me I treated her well, we flirted when I had a girlfriend, I said some encouraging words to her, and she once asked me on a date. One time she asked if I missed her and I said yes, she was a smartass and said I hadn't seen her in two years, so how could I miss her? It was a joke. I asked her to my fraternity's formal as a backup date and when I told her I had a date and explained my ex broke up with me the year before, a week before formal, and had to find a backup ASAP to save money, she got mad and rubbed it in my face and talked shit about me to my friends when we went to the bars. She even brought her current boyfriend with her to make me jealous and gave me shit on facebook. * A little while ago I decided to confess my feelings to my LoveInterest. It went something like this: -->'''Me:''' I love you. -->'''Love Interest:''' You mean as in friends, right? -->'''Me:''' Sigh. * This troper has both been the oblivious one and crushed on the oblivious ones. It hurts. :( * This troper's girlfriend was completely oblivious for a very long time before we got together. It was bloody exhausting. * This troper constantly and blatantly flirts, compliments,and makes it painfully obvious to everyone around us that this troper likes her. Guess who's the only one who doesn't notice? * This troper recently started dating a girl I have known for a year now. We both had a mutual crush and neither of us noticed that the other side was crushing on us. * This troper suspects, nay, feels that this ought to apply to him. The alternative explanation is that there was nothing to be oblivious to. A choice between two depressing explanations. Or he's invisible. * This troper was oblivious for quite some time. It's hard to blame

her, since she's HappilyMarried and the love to which she was oblivious...wasn't from her husband. * What? What's that you say? You think this troper is cute? Why thank you good sir, I think you look good too. What? What's that? [insert person's who just complimented troper name here] likes this troper? Don't be silly. * This troper spend all day playing D&D and pokemon with a group of people, one of which was a friend of mine. A girl was part of said group, and was apparently flirting with me all day. I didn't notice until my mom told me, actually. Two weeks later, she asked me out. To be fair, she is my first girlfriend, so I am somewhat new at the system. * This troper has reputedly been crushed upon by quite a few girls. If it is true, I didn't notice at all. Mind you, I'm not the sort of guy who picks up this stuff and I'm VERY new to the system (only had one girlfriend (I was twelve). And that one wasn't particularly volentary). I've commented on this with a friend, who offered to give me lessons in it. Alas, he hasn't come back on that one. * Looking back on our previous online conversations, this troper and her girlfriend were saying "I love you" to each other MONTHS before I confessed to her. Why did it take that long? >>; * I found out a guy liked me about 2 weeks ago when someone basically shouted it across the room. Then I found out that he had been liking me for ''months'' without me realizing. A more extreme example, I know a dude who is ''so freaking oblivious'' that at least 3 times girls have tried to blatantly hit on him without him understanding what they were doing. Blatantly as in 'try to climb into his car with him when he tells them he has to leave'. * This troper suspects this applies to him. I've only started to notice recently that there are several others at my school that seem interested in me. Then again, it's more being paranoid about if I'm wrong than not actually noticing it, but the trope still applies much of the time. * This troper seems to be like this no matter how many times people tell her. She's very observant when it comes to her friends' personal life but totally oblivious when it comes to her own love life. She would just shrug it off. * This troper is very much this trope. When one of her guy friends told her "I love you," her response was to chuckle and say, "I love you too dude! I love all my friends." He facepalmed and later told her that he loved her in the boyfriend sense. Her reply? "''All'' my friends are boys!" * Two gems from crushes of this troper: --> Troper's Crush: So, this girl you like, do I know her? --> This Troper: -facepalmAlso --> Troper's Crush: Oh, I'd know if it was me. * This troper is (was?) ''so'' oblivious to love that she often didn't even realize her ''own'' crushes. She (hopefully) managed to break this, though that may or may not be because a) EveryoneCanSeeIt from him and b) she recognized the signs from previous crushes. * This Troper is one of these with a friend of a friend, even though

looking back, the signs were blatantly obvious the friend of a friend had a crush on her. He even asked for her phone number and suggested they meet up sometime but she was still completely surprised when he eventually asked her out! It was only just recently she realised how his actions beforehand practically screamed "I think you're hot!" and yet she never got the message. * This Troper and her boyfriend both. We were attracted to each other from the moment we met, but it took us six months to realize it. A mutual friend even asked if there was something going on between us, and we still didn't see... * This Troper is involved in what seems to be a [[{{TriangRelations}}Type 3]] triangle, with the A-person completely oblivious. B seems to want to bend A to her will just for kicks, whereas Troper (C) has a probably-unrequited crush on A. C doesn't know how much more obvious her hints can get, but A still hasn't picked up on it. *sigh* * This Troper's obliviousness to guys' advances has become legendary among her friends. And (this is how bad it is) her parents. The most notable example stretched over an entire semester: an acquaintance was persistently and obviously flirting with her, and she didn't notice until he made a move so obvious he might as well have had a flashing neon sign over his head saying, "NOTICE ME!" All their friends did notice, however, far before that. At the beginning of the whole fiasco, when he came up behind her and tried to dance with her, she thought the crowd was pushing him against her and tactfully moved to the side so as not to look like she was throwing herself at him. She will admit that her friends' extreme frustration with her is justified. * Both sides, took me four years to release my fave crush favored me, and he's still taking his delicious sexy time figuring out it's MUTUAL. M.U.T.U.A.L. Basically the only guy I'd instant In-ARelationship with. EVER! * Oooh, boy. This Troper to a large degree. Of course, the fact that I'm rather hardheaded doesn't help. (Pro-tip: when dealing with me, subtlety doesn't work. In some cases, bashing me on the head and yelling in my face doesn't work either.) To wit; once, in high-school, I was having lunch with a few friends, and some other people I wasn't as familiar with. One of the girls I didn't know decided to come over and begin flirting with me. When I failed to notice her advances, she upped the ante and sat on my lap, continually flirting with me. And I '''''[[ThisIsSparta still. didn't. notice.]]''''' * Nine years before my good friend said anything about liking me and I had no clue the entire time. * Tha'ts how it happwn with This Troper when he fell in love with his now ex-girlfriend. After finally confessing his feelings and becoming a couple, he found out she had been in love with him for quite a long time. He then realized some of her attitudes screamed "I LIKE YOU!" a lot. How he had missed them still surprises him now. ** Also, same Troper, remember that back a few years ago, his mother assured him some of the girls of his school liked him. He finds that hard to believe. But who knows... * This troper knows a girl who would, if given a love note, would

check it for grammar. * Recently the case with my two friends, who both liked each other very much, and even though [[EveryoneCanSeeIt everyone could see it]] they didn't realise the other person liked them. They both kept [[SheIsNotMyGirlfriend denying it]] too, which didn't help matters. Long story short, they're ''finally'' together now. * Met her on SecondLife and she was a lot like me. We did some cybering when we first met, but after that I treated it as a friendship... till one day when I started complaining about one of my other hookups. It wasn't until she read me the riot act that I realized how much I'd hurt her... it still stings, especially since I'm pretty sure that's not the only time it's happened to me but I'm not sure with who else... * I am very much this, and well aware of it. I only tend to notice budding relationships that are glaringly obvious in others, and I am just flat out unaware someone likes me as more than a friend unless they actually tell me so in no uncertain terms. ---That trope would ''love'' if you would come back, ObliviousToLove. EveryoneCanSeeIt, you know. ----

OCStandIn * I once wrote a ''{{Stargate SG-1}}'' fanfic with one of the side characters being Melia, an Ancient whose total canon appearances were two ''StargateAtlantis'' episodes, including the pilot where she was a purely expository hologram. My take was basically a quirky, hyperactive female version of [[Series/DoctorWho the Doctor]]. ** Except for the female part that was pretty much redundant. * This troper and her two fellow fanfic writing friends ADORE this trope; every single thing we ever do focuses on minor characters, some of them so obscure that they don't even have ''names''. Of meaningful note is [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5861118/1/Dura_Lex_Sed_Lex Dura Lex Sed Lex]] (Friend #1), [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5569154/1/Express_Yourself Express Yourself]] (Friend #2), and my ChuChuRocket fanfic, [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5943764/1/We_Love_You_Anyway We Love You Anyway]]. * This Troper is using the {{One Piece}} filler character Tajio from the Post-Alabasta episode about the curry as one of the members of her crew. * [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Tropers/Blunderbuss Blunderbuss]]: Oh man, they are not ''kidding'' when they say MegaManX is sparse on characterization in the early games. The general who leads the Maverick Hunters in X3 and X4 is never actually named, nor do we even know if they're a reploid or ''anything'' about them. Not only that, but humanity ''itself'' is practically an OCStandIn, since humans are barely even mentioned. I decided to kill two birds with one stone and create Edmund Bauer, General Commander of the Maverick Hunters. (I also decided to name that pink-haired navi in MHX Circa, and actually give her a personality.)

* In a Pokmon fic [[{{Tropers/Bwburke94}} this troper]] is writing, he managed to apply both this and AuthorAvatar to one character, due to the fact the character shares his name. * These are this troper's guilty pleasure. Character needs depth and I need a story? Bam. * This troper has done this with one of the criminally under-used Pirate Lords from the third PiratesOfTheCaribbean movie. He's only in one scene since it's a Disney crossover where mostly animated movie characters show up, but he gets to have at least a little more characterization than the movie. * [[{{Tropers/Chabal2}} I]] seem to have a problem with this: most of the RP characters I use have little to no personality in the work they appear in and forge a completely new one. Case in point: [[{{Fantasia}} Czernobog]] and [[GoldenSun the Dullahan]]. ---I can't click that link myself, so I'll get my OCStandIn to do it. ----

OddNameOut [[AC: Real Life]] * This troper's friend's family has the following names: Eleanor, Agnes, Irene, Alfred and Joe. * This troper's boy scout patrol, has me, Jacob, James, John, Jordan, Jim, and Andrew. We decided that Andrew shall now be referred to as Andrew Jackson. * This troper's family has everyone end in ee sounds. Mary, Sonny, Zachary, Shelley, Sydney, Casey, the pets Daisy, Bunny (a chicken), Kitty (a fish), Fluffy (a fish) and the youngest human of the family... Carter. * In my maternal grandmother's side of the direct family (for all intents and purposes, grandparents are counted): Priscilla, Penny, Paul and... Kenny. Bonus points: during the time my grandma (Priscilla) was still married to Kenny, her last name was Phetterplace. * The sheer unusual-ness of [[{{Tropers/LadyBealzabub}} my]] RealLife name leads to me being this. My GirlScout troop was Diana, Rebecca, Jessica, Jennifer, Claudia and... ''Nova.'' ** Also when my mom was little she had three pet ducks named Duck, DuckDuck, and... Henry. She didn't name the third. * I married into a family whose names went: Joe, Jackie, Jenny, Julie, Joy... and Matthew. Matthew married Mary Anne, who gave birth to Molly, Madison... and Jake. Matt and Mary Anne claim that if they ever have another kid, they'll avoid an M. Maybe. * This troper's math teacher had four children, three girls who all had two part names that were usually shortened to first couple of syllables from the first name and "-is" (Riikkis, Hannis and Eevis, from youngest to oldest). The youngest child was a boy with a single part name and quite common one too. * Coincidence led to one corner of this troper's math class containing Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, and Easwaran (is that spelling right?). Slightly dizzying, and with no relation to any

[[MontyPython Bruces]] that might be hanging around. * This troper was in a class where the teacher had everyone say their name when they got called on, and sure enough, on day six students in a row (this troper included) were called on with the name "Michael." The seventh, though, was Chris and the teacher [[YouKeepUsingThatWord literally]] skidded, expecting another Michael. * This troper grew up with a family with seven kids. The father was James, the mother was Jane, the boys were Jensen, Jayson, Jamison, Jordan, and three others that I can't remember...the only daughter was Kaylee. ** This troper saw the names Jensen and Kaylee and wondered if the kids were named after [[{{Supernatural}} Jensen Ackles]] and [[{{Firefly}} Kaylee Frye]]. Then she realized that the timing would be incongruous and it's just a coincidence. * This troper once knew a family who had three kids named Jordan, Jessie...and Clint. The first two were girls, by the way. * A rare instance of the ''oldest'' child being the OddNameOut...Devon, Logan, and Lance. Apparently the mom ran out of her favorite names with Devon, so... * This troper knows a family by names of Bob, Barbara, Bobby, and...Megan. For bonus points, their last name also begins with B. ** [[DeathNote I hope they don't live in Los Angeles...]] * In the previous generation of this troper's family the girls were the following: Lori, Lisa, Tonya (or Jojo when she was a kid). * This troper and his siblings are named Manuel, Miguel and... Richard. * This troper knew siblings named Victoria, Veronica, and...Derek. * [[{{Tropers/Skazka}} This troper's]] siblings names go roughly in sequence alphabetically- K, for Katherine, L, for Lucy, M, for Mary, N, for... oh yeah, the fourth one's named James. ** Well, it's still J-K-L-M, right? * This troper's friend is named Chigozie. He has several brothers. Their names, including him, in age order: Nnamdi, Chigozie, Chidozie, Chibuka, ...and Chris. ** As this troper sees it, "Chris" isn't the odd one out in that group, even though his is the only one that sounds like "normal English". Nnamdi is, because everyone else's name starts with "C-h" and his starts with "N-n". ** As someone by the name Nnamdi (I can honestly say I never thought I'd see my name written on this site), I can tell you why Chris is still the OddNameOut for two reasons: *** Chris is not a traditional Igbo name *** Chris does not ''directly'' refer to God, while all of the other names do. ** In sort of an inversion of this, this troper has a friend who's the OddNameOut in a completely opposite way. His parents are named Mary and Anthony, and his brother's name is David. This poor guy's name? Mwaanza. No kidding. * This troper's wife is the odd name out among her two sisters and two cousins. Their names are Avery (odd name out), Stina, Kira, Kaja, and Mirise (mer-EE-suh). Incidentally, this troper himself has four cousins named Jennifer, Jonathon, Jessica, and Jillian, with no odd

name out. * This troper and her sisters: Marilee, Kelly, Courtney, and Natasha. * One set of my cousins are named Kristen, Kim, Kelly, and Michael. * A fencing pool that this troper recently took part in consisted of Martyn, Mark, Michael, Megan and... Carmen. ** [[{{Tropers/Hremsfeld}} This one]] remembers Nick, Nick, Nick...and Corey. Our opponents were Jon...Corey, Nick, Nick. It sucked! >_< * This troper once went to church with a rare case in which the ''father'' had the odd name out. Ginger (mother) Joshua (oldest son) Grant (middle son) Jacob (youngest son) and...Mark. ** Come to think of it this troper also went to school with a girl whose siblings went in this order: Aisling, Bridget, Casey, Deirdre...and Risa. This troper's friend has the odd name out. * My sister rooms with people named Justin, Jeffrey and Janet. Her name? Claire. * [[{{Tropers/Katsuhagi}} This troper]] has a double case: She is the only one in her dad's family not directly named after another relative in her first or middle name, which was done so intentionally. Her great-grandfather was William, her grandfather was James William, her father is Patrick James, and she would have been Sean Patrick has she been male. Incidentally she plans on calling her first son Sean. * During a RP event in ''WorldOfWarcraft'', four of our guild played the "Exodar Watch Force" with draenei alts, named Dalleroon, Daranasol, Drakog, and Suneibete. The D's were all coincidental, and the last one was coincidentally the only female. * This troper used to know a set of four sisters whose names were: Aum, Om, Euhm, and Lewella. The first three were all pronounced identically (like "ohm"), and their parents strictly forbade them to use nicknames. They never could tell who anyone was talking to. (PlanetOfSteves was totally, totally averted.) * My siblings are Alex, Alexandra... And I'm Aline. * [[{{Tropers/Aela}} This troper]]'s two brothers are Jacob and John. She's Michaela. * Rebeckah, Sarah, Robert, Joseph, Rachel, ''Alissa,'' Michael, Christopher. Add in middle names and Alissa is still the only "nontraditional" name. * This troper has collected moose stuffed animals since childhood. Their names are: Moose, Moosifur, George Moose, Marshall Moose, Huggy Moose, and Fred. * In a lot of my classes in High School, there are at least 2 Lewises, and occasionally 4.We are: Lewis Agnew, Lewis Bolland (me), Lewis Coule, and Lewis...Johnson.Some people call him Lewis Donson, so he fits. * This troper remembers his dad organising an evening of playing chess at his home. The players consisted of Peter, Peter, Peter, Pieter and Hans. (My dad is one of the Peters.) * My mom and her siblings go by Kats[uhisa], Tak[ahisa], Masako, Akiko... and Teddy. Granted it's actually Teruhisa, but he's the only one who goes by an Anglicized name. ** My dad and his siblings: Alan, Ann, Susan, Steven ...and Bruce. They're not sets of twins. ** Is your surname Shimadzu?

* Slightly subverted by a family when I was in school, with daughters named Jean, Joan, Jennette & Juanita. * This troper's mother's family would, for the most part, be at home in the Superman universe: every single one of them has the initials LL, except for the younger son, who is named Dave. (This troper also has an L name, but her siblings don't.) * This troper's class seems to have ended up with all the multiple names in the grade, with four Jennifers, three Sharons and two Audreys. The catch is, it goes: ''Sha''ron, ''Sha''ron, and Sha''ron''. The last girl is always getting her name mispronounced. * This troper once went on a Girl Scout camping trip where names of the scouts were Kirsten, Katy, Kara, Christie, Kristi, and Morgan. Morgan didn't clear matters up much by shouting "One of the K's is down" when one of us fell. * This troper's cousins are called Aimee, Aileen, Aidee and...Esmeralda * This troper once fell in a group sorted alphabetically. All but him started with a "J", so to make up for it, when referring to that he listed the group with his online handle ("Jesus" - [[AmericanIdiot of Suburbia]], blasphemy is unintentional). * This editor has a friend, whose name in Ann. Her brother is Andy, but guess what name her stepsister got when she was born? Michelle. * Inversion: This troper once became fast friends with two other people during a summer trip mostly *because* we discovered our names were Dan, Daniel, and Daniella. During the first day we met up with someone Daniella knew, and spent the rest of the day enjoying introducing ourselves as "Dan, Daniel, Daniella, and Jill." * This troper's family did it with middle names of the grandkids. You have (for the guys) the oldest Bradley Robert, youngest Justin Robert, and the first great-grankid Gavyn Robert. The middle one? This troper, Christopher Charles. For the girls, you have the middle one Melissa Lee, youngest one Megan Lee, and the oldest Jenifer Angelique. Who also violates first name theming, come to think of it. * This troper's mom-in-law and her sisters: Charlene, Charlotte, Colleen, Carla, Cathleen, Caitlyn, and Andrew. Andrew is a girl. * Like [[{{Tropers/Cameoflage}} this troper]] mentioned on the ThemeNaming page, a group of my RP characters: Beta, Gamma, Delta, Zeta, Sigma, and Marisol. It reflects the fact that Marisol's a different model of ArtificialHuman than the others. * It's a weird double case with this troper's father and his siblings. Jim, Jackie, and...Carlos. The double case is that Carlos is the only one who doesn't go by a nickname. (''James'' being this troper's father and Jackie being short for Jacqueline, which is also her ''middle'' name.) * This troper knew a family with four kids: [[TheBible Mathew, Mark, Luke]]... and Eric. Though Eric was actually the oldest, it was still weird. * This tropers siblings are called Ryan, Rachel and Robin, and me? Charis. * I have a friend named Jason. His older brother's name is Josh[we call him Sheep]. His little sister's name is Jessie. His mom's name is Jamie. And his dad's name...is Dave. [plenty of jokes are made about

it, and everybody's pretty good natured about it] * My mother and her sisters named their daughters April, Alyssa, Amber, Angel, Ayla, Amaliya...and Heaven. Strangely fitting, considering her mother was only a half-sister. * The neighborhood this troper grew up in is made up of four side streets: Strathmoor, Devonshire, Kensington, and Larry's Drive. She shits you not. * This troper's aunts/uncles/mother: James, Joseph, John, Mary Jane...Juanell? * Have you ever tried not being this if your last name exists out of 4 symbols of which only 2 are letters. As you can imagine A.B. (thats a real last name) stands out almost anywhere. Some computer systems dont even want to register my name like that. * This troper's siblings' middle names are Justice, Hope, Faith, Courage, and Wisdom. Hers? Joyce. * My friend and his brothers: Mark, Luke, John, and...''Martin''? * This troper's family all have names that were in the top 20 most common names during their year of birth. Grandma? Virginia, which was the seventh most common for girls at the time. Grandpa? Harold, thirteenth most common. Mom was Karen, which was fourth most common. Dad was Daniel, nineteenth most common for boys. Little sister? Jessica, sixteenth most common. Little brother? Jacob, which has been the first most common since 1999. My name? Zora, which ''hasn't even been in the top 1000 for decades.'' * At her church, this troper once got roped into being part of an act called "Linda, Linda, Linda, and me." * The female side of [[{{Tropers/KeL137}} this troper's]] family all have second names... except me :< * This troper is the odd one out. Her father's name is Alfonso, so her little brother's name is Alfonso. Her older sister's name is Irma because their mother's name is Irma. I'm the middle child with the first name of a neighbor. I am also the only one of the children not known by their middle name. * This troper and his siblings are named after characters from the bible--well, except for one. There's Mary, Paul, Mark (me), Elizabeth, and Artie. * This troper's family's pets my cousins have/had Ebony(dead cat), Sophie(dog), Charlie(Dog), Ollie(dog), Harry(dead hampster), and Stormy(cat); my grandmother has/had Rusty(dead dog)and Freddie(dog); I have/had Buddy(dead cat), Bonnie(cat). and... Clyde. * this tropers friends names are Dante, Nina, Leslie, and last but not least kina ---Michelle, Michael, Megan, and Joshua -- go back to Main/OddNameOut. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

OfCorsetHurts * TruthInTelevision, trust me. *cosplay flashback* Go back to the main pa-- [[OfCorsetHurts *gasp*]]

OfferVoidInNebraska * This troper's classmate has plenty of stories. He's from Argentina, specifically, southern Argentina (and the outskirts, supposedly) where it was pretty much a cultural wasteland. Not only were most people (Usually olderp eople) oblivious to some of the newer technology and were pretty much "Dagnabbed north stuff!" but the commercials were pretty much teasing the children. You'd see commercials for stuff that was either only valid in place like Mexico or was [[NoExportForYou only AVAILABLE]] in places like Mexico or Brazil. (They did have an import shop but it was mostly Tec Toy. For those of you nonBrazilians, Tec Toy is basically "Sega consoles" in the Brazilian market) * My brother came back from a trip around the UK with the realization that: Peanut butter is just simply not in Europe. ** One of my best friends is from Italy, and he practically cried on a recent trip back to the USA. The cause? A large display of Jif Peanut Butter at Walmart. He views the stuff with more reverence than most people view God. ** According to this troper's mother, most people in Europe (or at least Germany) seem to think peanut butter is disgusting. Especially with jelly, in a sandwich. * Peanut butter probably is as popular in the UK as in the USA but in no way is it a hard to find product. We do think mixing it with "jelly" is a bit disgusting though. * That this is enforced on the ''internet'' - something used primarily for, you know, ''sharing'' - is the main reason I am anti-copyright. * This troper knew of someone who bought a Pontiac Tempest in British Columbia, tried to get it serviced in California, but was turned down. The Pontiac Tempest is a [[MarketBasedTitle rebadged Chevrolet Corsica sedan]]. * This troper once posted the following bulletin at her former place of employment (and no, it has nothing to do with ''why'' it's her former place of employment -- it closed through no fault of her own): --> All employees wishing to participate in our voluntary recycling program should deposit their recyclables in these containers. Participation is encouraged but not required. No copyright infringement is intended against any of the manufacturers of the recycled products, and no profit is being derived from this program except a cleaner environment, which profits us all. This notice is printed on 80% post-consumer recycled paper. No animals were harmed in the making of this notice. All rights reserved, but all lefts available. Offer void in Utah. If not fully satisfied, please return unused portion of this notice for a full refund. ---Take this quick trip back to OfferVoidInNebraska! (Offer only valid in Mexico, Brazil, Canada, and America. Offer void in Tennessee and Quebec. Void where prohibited.) ----

OffingTheOffspring * Considering the circumstances of This Troper's birth, This Troper wouldn't hold it against his mother if she tried this on him. * This Troper's mom has used the "I brought you into this world..." threat before. Somewhat Justified since his birth was the final nail in her first marriage's coffin. At least he knows where the nerve is and how to strike it though, right? ** This troper's father used the same threat. It was clearly meant to be scary, but to me, it sounded so [[{{narm}} corny]] that I just turned it against him at the first occasion ("''You'' brought ''me'' into this world, I can take you out!") *** This troper's father tries this threat sometimes. Always an EpicFail. * ...On a note, this troper's father likes to mention since she is rather slow, if ever there were a time for a sacrifice, he's not hesitating to offer her and run away safely. * I have my paranoid bouts and imagine someone close to me might try to kill me. But it's mostly cause I smoke too much. * While my mother never threatened to outright kill me, when I was young (around 8-9 years old), she threatened (more than once, I might add) to cut out my tongue if I ever lied to her. She even told me she kept some scissors in her pocket for just this purpose. I later realized this was because she worked as a seamstress at the time, but it still scared the shit out of me back then. * Okay, so this trope has never happened to [[Tropers/AdelePotter This Tropette]] (thank god), but am I the only one who genuinely finds the "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out" threat scary? I mean, surely that threat has to be illegal ''somewhere''. When I was little, I was terrified when I heard this, the logic being "They're my parents! Why would they lie to me?" * The mere fact that ''THIS'' article of all things has a TroperTales page is downright scary. ** Same. ---Go back to OffingTheOffspring; you might just survive it. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

OffModel * This artistic troper usually doesn't have too much of a problem with this, except for one my characters, [[CreepyDoll Em the doll,]] who never has the same proportions twice... * This troper (aka philipnova798), knows the fine line between staying consistent and being off model. That said, it happens a lot. While staying mostly consistant, problems with [[HouseHusband Paul's]] (A crustacean) head spikes and claws, [[DoggedNiceGuy Dogged nice guy]] (or [[DeadpanSnarker Deadpan snarker]], depending on his mood) Peter's (a swordfish) nose and [[ThoseTwoGuys Potty and Audrey Jr.'s]] (Plants) Chin placements (Potty has an overbite, Audrey Jr. has an underbite, which tend to switch fairly often) occur fairly often.

Other minor things include [[BikerBabe Haley's]] hair length and eyes, [[PacMan The Pac-ghosts]] (known as the Ghost Mafia) heights, [[BadassAutomaton Spybot's]] head when viewed from different angles along with other minor details like proportions, head shapes, line thickness and hand positions. Also parodied with with a character known as Gus, who's basically a walking, talking mistake. Did I mention that this series takes place in a (Fictional) town in Arizona with a Lion for a mayor? It's also worth pointing out that the off model effect was worse when the characters were first made (No one looked the same twice... at all. For instance; Peter would had thin limbs, thick nose and large in one panel and in the next panel, a smaller head, a shorter & stubbier nose and proportions that would make even the worse artists cry in pain, hence the idea of Gus) * I myself give not a damn about drawing consistently, as I tend to just [[BeyondTheImpossible exaggerate everything I draw]] [[ToyStory to infinity and beyond.]] * [[BearyScary I]] have never intentionally drawn OffModel, except maybe when I was a really really young artist and used cartoonier styles to take it easy on myself, but holy crap does my older stuff ''look'' it. I still struggle with getting anatomy right and sometimes suffer from my ignorance regarding how to translate references into my artistic language. * Since my childhood, I have always wondered how artists manage to draw their characters so consistently. I could never. Over the years, my characters have gone through an incredible ArtEvolution as my skills sharpened, so by now, they tend to look "on-model" on most pictures. But not having settled down on one particular drawing style, I sometimes switch over to a drastically different style than my previous drawings (especially if going for a certain theme), which results in the characters looking off-model a lot. But one has to ask: if I didn't create any "official" character models in the first place, can anything really be off-model? * I can draw everything pretty consistently...except HAIR. I will fill entire pages with drawings of a character's hair because it's never the same thing twice.

OffscreenTeleportation * My little brother does this a lot. Way more times than humanly possible. * This troper manages this from time to time despite being 6'4" and around 350 pounds, which adds to the effect. Basically it all comes down to misdirection, being certain the "victim" knows for darn certain you are somewhere else and that most people tend not to think of alternative routes nor passed time. * This troper once did it by accident, where a friend walked into a room looking for him, I walked past, but he turned round in just the right way that he never saw me. Moments later he came back in with a very confused look on his face. Especially hilarious since he has been declared the most "ninja" person in our school. * This troper went on a school field trip to a zoo with his friends. His friends lagged behind a bit when he was walking, so he decided to

take advantage of this. He walked ahead of the group to where everyone could see him and turned a corner.Then, he hid behind some bushes and waited for the group to pass him. Afterwards, this troper spent a good 10 minutes walking right behind them before anyone noticed I was gone. The look on their faces when they turned around was priceless. * [[{{Seiryu}} This troper]] ''loves'' doing this to his friends and family. When they stopped being surprised by this trick, this troper started adding in trick poppers. You know, the ones that make a loud snapping noise when they hit the ground? Cue common usage of the phrase "Not again, you sneaky son-of-a-bitch!" * [[{{Hremsfeld}} This one]] once, at a friend's house, upon hearing that the pizza was ready, managed to come downstairs, grab a slice, and head back upstairs, coming within two feet of the cook, ''without her noticing.'' So, it wasn't so much as ''me'' teleporting, as it was the slice of pizza. Tasty, tasty ninja pizza. * This troper, once in middle school, somehow managed to, inconspicuously, break off from a group of walking friends to enter the bathroom, exit, and take an alternate route to their destination, the inconspicuousness of which was done purely by accident. Needless to say, looks of confusion were had by them as one offered the simplest solution. "Clearly he teleported!" It's now even become somewhat of a meme, though recently it's taken a turn to ''PowerPerversionPotential''. * My friends do this ''all the time.'' One particular incident from my high school days, which I still remember: I snapped on a JerkJock. My friend, who was (and is) also frequently a MoralityChain, calmed me down from the other side of the room. I returned to my work. A few minutes later: "Hi," says the friend now located directly behind me. No sign of their arrival whatsoever. ''What the ----?'' Several of my friends also have a remarkable tendency to vanish if I look away and not reappear until they platonically {{Glomp}} either myself or an unvanished companion. * This troper has a mild tendency to walk up behind people when they aren't looking. Qualifies due to the fact that many people are convinced that I'd teleported from right in front of their eyes to behind them. * [[EtherealFrog This Troper]] once managed to go into the hall, grab his book, and re-enter the classroom during a lunch period without anyone noticing. My friends concluded that I had used [[StarWars the Force]] to either convince them that I never moved, or was capable of teleporting. I can also StealthHiBye pretty well. * This troper's high school had a lot of short walls next to where you're supposed to walk that this troper preferred to use. Once he jumped off next to his friend who didn't notice him. He described it as looking like I fell out of the sky. * This troper has been accused of having this ability, but is unable to use it consciously. He's performed this on an entire class, teacher included. * This troper's teacher did a ''very creepy'' example of this. I was sitting in front of the classroom, and the teacher came from behind the edge. Okay, that was still normal. The creepy part was when he passed me and I looked the other way for about five seconds. Then I

turned my head again, and he had mysteriously vanished. The corridor was straight and ended to stairs, so he couldn't have turned anywhere without me seeing him. I had heard nothing: Not any steps in the stairs, nor any classroom doors opening or closing. Nothing. * This troper has a tendency to just randomly appear. I've spent a maximum solid time of 20 minutes just standing, even talking before they notice me, at which point, I'm simply not there anymore. ** Same here * This troper had a reputation for doing this, often accidentally, and it was frequently referred to as "ninja teleportation". It ended when this troper started wearing jangly keys dangling from a belt loop, or wearing jangly-zippered and creaky leather jackets, although the occasional incident still occurs (most notably when a (now ex-) girlfriend spotted me leaving the flat on the way to the supermarket. Line of sight was broken by a bush as ''she'' went to the supermarket, and she didn't notice that I was walking along literally next to her, jangly keys and all, until halfway ''back'' * This troper's ninja friend used to do this. The most disconcerting time was when he managed to disapear from a locked room while I was still in it. * This troper's dearly-departed cat was an absolute master of this. I swear, I would let her outside, with no windows open, and then ten minutes later I realize that she's purring in my lap and I'm petting her, with no explanation given. * This troper's parakeet does it sometimes. Flies out of the kitchen and is then on top of it's cage (in the kitchen), despite not being seen coming back from the living room. * There are two ways to get to the canteen in [[{{MiraShio}} my]] school. If you see me three feet behind you as you're walking down the corridor, I'll take the garden path, then you'll see me three feet ahead of you at the counter. * I have a habit of suddenly appearing during the middle of a conversation leading to the usual 'when the fuck did you get here?' I'm just naturally good at abusing people's visual detection and can walk silently in boots. It's like disconcerting since I'm in excess of 6' tall and weigh 17 stone. * This troper is so good at this he'll frequently do it accidentally. He's normally a very noticeable person, over 6' tall, 200 pounds, and cheerfully dressed, but people never seem to hear or see him when he moves. * This troper's father can walk so quietly, you'd swear he was gliding over the floor. Generally, he's not doing it on purpose, he's just entering the same room as you to get something, or talk to you. He did scare me with this as a kid, but I quickly became accustomed to him randomly appearing in any room. My overly paranoid brother, on the other hand, still never expects our dad to appear in the room, usually having some sort of comedic but unintentional conniption when he realizes our dad is there. * This troper who is 6 feet three inches does this a lot. It is justified though, as this troper weighs 144 pounds, far less than most people two thirds his height at his school; and he walks very quietly and with haste.

* a large amount of people from my high school would likely attest to my ability to suddenly be behind them...i did it quite often despite being 5'10" and about 250 pounds. it wasn't intentional at first, but i found it amusing that I'd usually startle them by doing so. * this tropers Mother has it. any time they go shopping, his troper turns her back for ten seconds and ''poof'', mom's gone. it usually takes about 10 minutes to find her. * Anyone who's owned (been owned by?) a cat knows they are the absolute ''masters'' of this. * [[{{Nyperold}} I]] do this sometimes, as I tend to be very quiet. The usual results of this are that I walk through the house to where my mother is, and unintentionally scare her. Then I have to wait a few seconds for her to recover from her surprised laughter so I can get on with whatever I went there for. A more unusual result is one time when I, despite being in my early 30s, played hide-and-seek outside at night with people ranging in age from single digits to roughly 20. Rather than hiding directly behind things, I'd hide in shadows, and approach the base when those who were "it" were looking elsewhere. One round, I made it back while the it was standing a couple of yards away from base, looking away. Not even the people at base realized I was nearby until I reached it. The it turned around, and her eyes got big for a second in surprise. A common question for that day's session was "Where did you ''come'' from?" and variations. (I didn't do so well the next day, however. Also, my legs ached for a while afterward.) * This is why I actually ''like'' being one of the shortest people in my class. * Knowing the layout of the high school backwards and forwards made this trope easier. * Someone I went to high school with had this trope - Perhaps the biggest instance was when we left Game Club. The person was still in the room when we left - then we go into the library where we usually spend our free periods...and ''there he is''. * One of [[{{KennyMan666}} my]] friends does this ''all the time''. You'll talk to her, turn away for a second, and she's gone. Then she'll randomly appear again. It's very much one of the {{Running Gag}}s with her, and combined with that she's never on time, locating her is a bit of a crapshoot. Another, younger friend, that I describe as the [[StarWars padawan]] of the first friend, have started teleporting occasionally too. Takes after her master, indeed. * Our upper secondary arts teacher does this. ''Constantly''. Or at the very least he's able to walk through walls. This has spawned many theories of his actual nature. The current top bill is with "the personification of the school". * This Troper is particularly fond of doing this, be it on purpose or not. Friends often are talking to me while I stand on one side of them, they look away less than a second, and find me behind them a whole 6 feet. I do this despite being the heaviest and tallest of my circle of friends, and often wearing boots and cargo pants filled with jingling coins and belt buckles. I even do this around the house, as I walk somewhere, stop, and then walk again, and the parents accuse me of sneaking. This, somehow, extends even to videogames. * On occasion, [[@/{{Seiryu}} me.]] One time out of four, it's

intentional, and either part of a prank, or to keep my friends convinced I'm a ninja. The other three times, it's unintentional. I'm just a speed-walker. * I (AmoveoNex) have a tendency to walk away from his friends if when they're talking to each other. And of course, when I see them again, I approach them (most often from behind), and when they see me, they shat brix. --Go back to OffscreenTeleportation, but only if no one's looking. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

OffTheRails * This editor once played a ''CallOfCthulhu'' game in which the GM had the main villain sneaking around stalking the party. Naturally seeing where this was going, the Loon in the party shot him in the head, ending the scenario before the villain could actually harm anyone or anything. The GM sent us shopping and couldn't think of anything to do afterwards, and the gaming group broke up following that. ** So, essentially, by killing both the character and the gaming group, the Loon [[EveryoneIsJesusInPurgatory shot the]] ''[[EveryoneIsJesusInPurgatory game]]'' [[EveryoneIsJesusInPurgatory in the head]]. That's both brilliant and horrifying. *** Good thing he didn't shoot [[spoiler: The Game]]. That would be bad. * Personal Anecdote (Schol-R-LEA): ** In a pick-up [[CrossOver 'Dimension Stew']] game (characters from various game settings thrown randomly together into a scenario) a friend of mine played in, the GM started off by having them surrounded by hundreds of vampires. OK, my friend asks, will his OtherSuns (!!!) character's 'hand weapon' work? Nope, the gun won't fire. Fine, will the explosive warhead work? Sure, the GM says. OK, my friend replies (already fed up with the GM's incompetence); I set the fuse and drop it at my feet. Three seconds later, the '''mini-nuke''' goes off. Total time for the campaign: fifteen minutes. ** This same friend (who has a real knack for maliciously skewering incompetent [=GMs=]) came into a game as a money-obsessed assassin, whose partner was a bounty hunter. They were hired to guard a convoy traveling through a dangerous wasteland (the GM completely ignoring their intention, stated openly out of game, of killing and robbing their client once they figured out the secret of the treasure they were carrying). During the journey, they were attacked by a group of slavers. The GM's intention was that they would free the slaves after they defeated the slavers; one of the slaves apparently was to do something important at their destination. Instead, they ditched the convoy and went off to sell the slaves in the nearest town. The crude attempts of the GM to bring them back on plot tore the game asunder. *** Similar thing happened to me, only it was drugs. I let them sell the drugs, they made a hefty profit, bought some cool magic items, I

pulled out another module. Also happened when they tried to rob the coach with the [=NPCs=] who introduce the next adventure. They realized it was a bad idea when I looked in the module, and realized all the [=NPCs=] had magic items. (Only one guy stayed and fought, and his character died, but got replaced by his twin brother. Oh, no resurrections, it was IN THE MODULE that the dagger required a Wish spell to resurrect.) ** In a [[WorldOfDarkness Vampire: The Masquerade]] game, another friend's character managed, after various misadventures, to get ahold of the MacGuffin, and decides to find out what it was. The GM slyly informs him that it is a vial of the blood of Caine. "Fine," the player replies. "I drain the next human I find, and feed him the blood from the vial, creating the first new 2nd generation vampire in 10,000 years and setting off [[TheEndOfTheWorldAsWeKnowIt Gehenna]]". *** Sadly, the player should have read the rules more closely; only fresh blood can create a vampire in [=VtM=]. Points for creativity. *** Although if anyone had a legitimate excuse to have their vitae retain its potency despite not being fresh, Caine would be that someone. ** Another [=VtM=] LARP chronicle I played in ended through a combination of a {{Munchkin}}ing assassin, a bored [[TeamKiller spoiler player]], and a paintball gun and several balls filled with napalm instead of ink. The game actually ended with a something of a RocksFallEveryoneDies moment, but at that point the only characters still standing were the munchkin (of course) and a single NPC [[http://zoo.nightstar.net/viewtopic.php?t=6746 See here for details]]. ** This troper submits that virtually all online versions of GM-run tabletop games (typically played in various message boards and forums) are doomed to premature or tangled conclusions (usually both, of course) due to the lack of cohesion online play lends, snarky deliberate intentions against the GM or other players, not to mention sudden tendencies for players to leave in disgust or real-life intervention; thus, it could be argued that such games go off the rails from day one. *** This troper submits that the above troper does not know what he is talking about, having been in quite a few online games that lasted without problems or derailing of any sort. Clearly the above troper should stop playing with morons online, and start playing with normal sensible people instead. *** This troper submits in addition that snarky deliberate intentions of any kind against part or all of a group indicate serious problems that have nothing to do with the online factor, and real life happens regardless of game location. ''Normal, sensible people you can trust'' goes a long way toward group cohesion, both online and off. **** This troper wonders where the above tropers obtain their supply of so-called ''normal, sensible people''. Thus far, this troper has understood normal and sensible to be subjective terms, and wonders how many real people the above tropers have interacted with on a regular basis. Concepts of normal and sensible tend to wither and die, along with a great many other expectations about the intentions and thought processes of other human beings.

* In a D&D epic level villain campaign, two of the players became sick of the GM never doing anything more interesting than dungeon crawling and showing ludicrous favoritism to another player. So, they conspired, and came up with a plan (involving [[NoodleImplements an isolated city of drow, some clever tactics, an act of genocide, and a Miracle spell]]) to create a permanent unclosable portal into hell. Which was, technically, the long term plan for one of the [=PCs=] ''anyway''... but the result was definitely OffTheRails. ** This troper considers that one of the greatest gaming moments of his life. Also, if the DM didn't want us to enact a ritual that could only be powered by genocide, then he should never have put the last few survivors of the drow race all in one underground village and then told us where it was. *eg* * This was, and still is, my first campaign, but in order of what happened: I killed an orc in a rage of self-pity and wussiness, wielded the said orc, threw the orc down a 10x10x10 ft pit, then after getting stuck down there, I attempted to eat its flesh in an attempt to regain health, thus angering the GM and causing {{Discontinuity}}. I also shot-put myself across said pit, but that is not important. ** ...Was this GM running a game of tabletop Nethack? * This editor was told the story of a game of ''{{Shadowrun}}'', and he is sorry he wasn't there himself. The story basically begins as the party enters a convenience store to purchase a few items. The GM says to one of the players, a very large ork with multiple cybernetic implants and a violent disposition, "A little old lady bumps into you as you exit the store. 'Oh, excuse me!', she says." Without hesitation, the player says "I [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DDT_%28professional_wrestling%29 DDT]] her." It basically goes downhill (or uphill, depending on who you ask) from there, culminating in the destruction of a retirement home with a missile launcher. ** This troper once DM'ed a game of Shadowrun wherein they had to get into the bonded warehouse area of Sea-Tac airport to hijack a cargo. Rather than simply slip the gate guard 50 nuyen, they instead shot the guard and crashed through the gate in an armored van. After airport security quite predictably showed up and started a high-speed car chase, the players tried to make security "back off" by ''claiming to have a bomb''. Yes. After already shooting a gate guard and crashing through, they then made a bomb threat. In a major international airport. In the dark cyberpunk future. One Knight Errant elite counter-terrorist strike team later, the game ended. Badly. * [[CapnAndy This editor]] is particularly pleased with how efficiently a group I was in once derailed the famous ''Masks of Nyarlathotep'' campaign for ''CallOfCthulhu''. Upon seeing the slightest mention of the sister of the explorer who was recently killed, my character bluffed his way into her house with sheer boldfaced lies, thus meeting her and getting her information '''way''' before the plot indicated we should have it. Then we tracked down the voodoo store and laid plans to ambush and kill everyone inside while they were leaving one of their obvious cult meetings, prompting the [[GameMaster GM's]] anguished cry of "are you ''sure'' your characters would really do that?" -- the clearest sign there is that you've gone

totally off the rails. When the GM tried to remind us about our friend who had sent us the letter and would be meeting us in a week (meeting him is a major plot point and, under normal circumstances, is what starts the plot actually running) and suggest not so subtly that we should wait for him, we replied that we fully intended to have the case entirely solved before he ever arrived. The GM nearly sobbed. ** I'd love to know how your group managed to solve the case in a week, considering it requires overseas jaunts to at least three foreign countries -- in the 1920's, so by boat -- and some very handson investigation. Unless your GM substantially altered the storyline a week's completion time for Masks is impossible. It's easier to derail a weak GM than a good one, though... ** I didn't say we solved it, I said we told the GM we intended to solve it before our friend ever got into port. Since we weren't waiting passively around for the guy to show up, and you can stretch seven in-game days into a ''long'' time in the real world if you fill them with stuff to do, the GM couldn't handle it, locked up, and that was it for him. Now, the obvious answer would have been to have the ship get in unexpectedly early and just for good measure have the party discover the body before the police did, just to hit us with some police suspicion that could have easily forced us into fleeing the country (and thus back onto the rails), but he just couldn't deviate from the sourcebook enough to figure that out. There's a ''reason'' this sort of thing only happens to bad [=GMs=]. *** If your GM's reaction to your "we'll solve Masks in a week" statement was anything other than contemptuous laughter then he didn't read the source material. Yeah, he was weak. You should find a good GM to run Masks for you; it's a classic and really shouldn't be missed. For the record, you can completely skip the opening MacGuffin and still get on the trail; there'd be no need for early boat arrivals or any kind of railroading. However, skipping over leads in a Cthulhu game is often equivalent to seeing if all this nice shiny rope the GM is giving you would make a good necktie. * This troper has been working on a fantasy story for several years, and on finishing putting together an early version of the world, made the perhaps unwise decision to test it by running a D&D game in it, just to see if it was actually even interesting. Unfortunately, the gameplay style of the players was not taken into account, and as soon as their characters were in the world, they promptly forgot the main quest and decided to spend their time experimenting as to what forms of hallucinogenic drugs had what effects on the variety of supernatural creatures the world contained. They also took time to invent Doritos and try to get several villages of nonhuman creatures hooked on them. Sadly enough, thanks to the [[RandomNumberGod dice seemingly always taking the side]] of the currently least rational player, they succeeded at nearly every world-breaking thing they tried, without ever even attracting the attention of the game's Big Bad or any other evil, thanks to their reluctance to do anything remotely adventurer-ish. * Another point, I was in a Shadowrun game where we were supposed to sneak quietly through an enemy base. Instead, we blew up the munitions depot and casually walked through the smoldering ruins, easily getting

the prototype weapon back. * A prime example of the "this is what the players will do to get back at bad [=GMs=]" variety: In a ''Star Wars'' campaign, the GM had a [[MartyStu totally badass mysterious longcoat with Force powers and a special prototype stealth X-Wing]] NPC show up again and again to kill all our enemies and accomplish our objectives every time we ran into the slightest bit of trouble. The player group responded by going on strike: Every time the Rebel Alliance gave us a mission, we just told them to send that guy instead and went back to trying to sneak into Luke Skywalker's room. ** This troper once participated in a ''Star Wars'' campaign in which the GM introduced a totally badass Force-powered cat-man [[TheScrappy Scrappy]] capable of killing the entire party with ease. Before the campaign died due to terminal lack of interest, the party's out-ofcharacter battle cry quickly became "Space the cat!" ** One of this troper's short-lived SWS parties was once ambushed by three Stormtroopers and an Officer in a hallway. Unbeknownst to the other players, the GM was of the "Stormtroopers are actual stormtroopers and not cannon fodder" school of thought, and thus the party decided to go out of their way to kill them. This troper knew what was coming, having known the GM for many years, and spent much of the ensuing two-hour combat sequence first trying to convince everyone to run, and then actually running. Eventually the other characters got the message, but not before this troper had made off with the MacGuffin and attempted to finish the GM's plot himself. ** In one epic moment of derailment, this troper's partner in an RP decided to truly derail the entire Star Wars universe. Upon meeting Anakin Skywalker during the Clone Wars, the player managed to kill him in a prolonged fight then proclamed to have "won" StarWars. * This troper has never understood the negative attitudes towards this trope, as it often leads to adventures much more interesting than the one originally planned. Unexpected player actions, insanely lucky dice roles, and discovery of hidden items have resulted in some of the best gaming sessions ever. Stories generated include a PC's betrothed marrying a monkey, a sex-bot trying to hijack the [=PCs=]' spaceship, and an almost total kill of the party as the result of a banana peel. ** This troper can see both sides: On one hand, going off the rails got the most amusing near-TPK ever, when the GM said "You appear in a desert" and then everything else happened without him providing any input. On the other hand, this also led to a Star Wars campaign where we went to the ''wrong planet'' (in an attempt to stay ON the rails!) and missed all of the plot. *** The main question is GM skill and wasted preparation: if your GM is not creative, he will be terribly upset that you have ruined hours and hours' worth of preparation, and will be unable to think of how the campaign should go now (If he only has micro-scale preparation, then it's all ruined by going OffTheRails). On the other hand, if your GM forms his quests from simply understanding the game world and NPC motivations (lots of macro-scale planning, very little micro-scale planning), he can easily roll with the punches. **** This troper (who often ends up being the GM) notes that player intent also plays heavily. A good GM most certainly will have a good

ad-lib available for an unexpected response, and will come into the session aware that a group that intends to play a party of affiliated paladins will necessarily have a different response to plot developments than a party of ruthless hit-men thrown together by chance (and take it into account with events like the aforementioned "slave caravan encounter".) But there's a big difference between dealing with a player who does something unexpected because it's logical or in character, and one who does it because he/she is hogging attention, thinks he/she recognizes a trope, or worse, read the premade adventure module. For the latter, a good stiff lightning bolt might be a kindness to everyone else trying to play the game. * In a first level D&D campaign, this troper's group came upon a mining village being run by orcs, goblins, and ogres with an ogre magi being in command of the place. There was also a collection of barrels at the center of the village that were clearly marked as being dangerous. The intention was, since this encounter was clearly out of our league, we would solve it diplomatically. One flaming arrow later and a first level party had successfully blown up the campaign. ** This illustrates two of the crucial rules of gamemastering: *** 1. Anything you expect the [=PCs=] to talk to or flee from, they will fight. *** 2. Anything you expect the [=PCs=] to fight, they will talk to or flee from. ** This troper was once responsible for killing an important plot NPC with a poorly-placed fireball (he was grappled by an angry ent at the time, and this troped assumed a GIANT WOODEN FIST would provide cover). To the DM's credit, though, the death of the NPC managed to not affect the plot at all, though in retrospect, the [[MartyStu badass hooded ranger stronger than all of us and named Drake]] was probably better off dead anyhow. * This Tropers RMPS class (secondary School) once held a game over several weeks. The game had a map of an island with a grid pattern laid over it. Coloured squares of paper would be put down on the grid to simulate territory aquisition. The intended purpose of the game was to teach us about how we would react, what lengths we would go to to accomplish the objectives that our factions were given at the start of the game regardless of how evil our actions may seem. No doubt the Teacher had imagined that [[EnemyMine alliances would be temporary at best due to the (nominally) conflicting interests of each team]]... By the End of the game, We had taken control of my faction after a civil war with other team members (Me and one friend vs Everyone else in our faction), established the European Union (Outside of Europe, no less), conquered a quarter of the entire map and brought about world peace after destroying two out of six of the factions that didn't join my alliance...[[WhatTheHellHero With Nuclear firepower]]. Civil wars and alliances that were anything but temporary hadn't even been considered as part of the game mechanics before my friend and I arrived. * This troper ({{Regiment}}) was the GM for an awkward OffTheRails adventure. The players were chasing down a serial killer with [[SchrodingersGun ill-defined motives]]. Presumably, they'd find him, have an epic battle, and kill him. As soon as they met this guy faceto-face, the very ''first thing that happened'' was one of the players

asking the villain if he needed any help. He ended up hiring them and becoming a far more interesting character. Actually, this was basically the opposite of what this party tended to do to this poor troper. They tended to rob and kill any mildly important NPC, which made it hard to make [=NPCs=] that were important to the plot. * This troper (EvilRocks) was part of a party that did this to the most outrageous degree possible. Upon receiving a mission to find an antidote for a drug-addicted NPC, we tracked down and killed the drug lord, stole his merchandise and got several villages addicted to it. After extorting them for all their gold, we formed them into a private slave-army, which we used to capture the capital of a large state in a surprise attack involving wagons filled with hay with people hiding under it strategically placed around military targets in the city. We then rallied all the armies of our new kingdom and attacked all nearby areas. The GM sent an enormous monster in an attempt to destroy our military and get us back to our quest, but we used our drug-addicted army as cannon fodder and lured it to the main stronghold of our most powerful competitor. It destroyed the stronghold and was weakened to the point where it was an easy kill for massive XP. I think our GM was in tears. ** If my players ever pulled something like that, I think I'd actually reward them for the imagination and cunning they showed. * This troper used to have a friend who was infamous within the group for continually taking things OffTheRails at the most random of times. He would kill [=NPCs=], other [=PCs=], sabotage PC plans, frame [=PCs=] for crimes (and then turn them in), start wars, and every other thing possible to mess with the game and the plot. Whether the other [=PCs=] wanted it messed with or not. He gave a variety of excuses for his behavior, but it generally boiled down to either he was bored with his character or he wanted to play a different game system or genre entirely or (more rarely) he was upset over something OOC and wanted to vent the frustration in game. It was entertaining at first because it could bring a well needed change of pace, but when game after game went down in flames due to his ADD, the friend soon found himself wondering why he wasn't getting invites to play anymore. He never did really understand why the other players didn't always find it fun. * This troper once heard about a {{Paranoia}} game which opened with the GM passing notes to each of the players (the preferred method of communication when they don't want anyone else to see them). The players looked at the notes, then suspiciously looked at each other, then proceeded to slaughter each other, going through all six clones (per player) in moments, before the game had even begun. Of course, given the tone of Paranoia, the GM was particularly pleased by this outcome. ** That's not off the rails. That's the purest and truest game of Paranoia ever played. *** Eh, only if they're playing Zap (kill people for no real reason). Classic (silly slapstick humorous paranoid antics) isn't actually supposed to be played like that, and if they were playing it Straight (Paranoia actually done seriously) it's ''definitely'' off the rails. Most people play Classic mode, and play it like it's Zap, though.

* On the Wizards.com forums, there was a thread about a player asking what a bottle of "Blue Dragon Spinal Fluid" was for. After a lengthy discussion, mostly involving the likelihood that the spinal fluid was important to the DM's campaign, and after someone randomly suggested drinking the spinal fluid, someone suggested treating it as a "Potion of Making the DM Cry." * This troper once participated in a D&D game in which the party was attacked by a couple of gnolls and a human sorceress. We easily killed the gnolls, but decided to take the sorceress hostage instead of killing her, thus derailing the story. Suggestions as to what to do with her ranged from interrogating her (she refused to speak, mainly because the GM had no lines for her and didn't want to give away crucial information too early) to taking her clothes and using them as a disguise. Eventually, we decided to attach several vials of alchemist's fire to her and use her as a human bomb on an upcoming large group of gnolls, completely avoiding a large combat sequence. The GM was sorely tempted to change all of our alignments to Evil. ** I wonder why. *** After reading the beginning of that entry I immediately thought "gang rape," so it could have been worse. * When he was about twelve years old, this troper ({{Moogi}}) and several friends would create verbal role-playing games to entertain us on school bus rides. One notable game went from a simple 'you are an assassin, now kill these people' tale with me (the player) as a halfling assassin into a war epic. See, I ended up assassinating a powerful king (as planned) but then I found a legal loophole that made me the ruler of his kingdom (which was not what the GM had in mind at all). I quickly became something of a Hobbit-Hitler, trying to conquer the world. If memory serves, I attempted to [[AGodAmI become a god]] after this. ** Your hobbit wasn't named [[BaldursGate Tiax]] by any chance? * This troper had a particularly memorable forum RP session (The thread for which has sadly vanished into the dark of the net) that quickly turned from the cliche scenarios that particular GM was disliked for, to overtly trying to break his mind. We got as far as our characters putting God (The GM) on trial for neglecting the world (And our existence and misadventures was used as major evidence) before he stopped resisting the urge to [[RocksFallEveryoneDies kill us all.]] * This troper remembers hearing about a {{Paranoia}} game that ended within ten minutes when a {{PC}} ''{{Logic Bomb}}ed'' the ''fucking [[BadBoss Alpha Computer]]'' into annihilation! ** Dear God! How!? ** Found under CrowningMomentOfFunny, copy-pasted below. Note that by all rights it shouldn't have worked--the Computer should have just had him executed under suspicion of being a machine empath--but it seems the DM either didn't think of that, or wanted to reward cleverness. *** "During a game of Paranoia, I requested something (I can't remember what) from the Computer. It rejected the request, telling me that I needed Green Security Clearance to access what I wanted. On a whim, I asked what security clearance was required to know that people with Green Security Clearance had access to that which I was asking

for. The answer? Yellow, which is one step below Green. As a Troubleshooter with only Red Clearance (two steps below Yellow), I pointed out to The Computer that it was breaking its own security precautions, giving out restricted information. Having a couple previous clones die for breaking security precautions, I wondered if it was going to break MORE security precautions by ignoring its own actions. Faced with this Logic Bomb, the Big Eye of The Computer closed, and all the lights went out in Alpha Complex. In a game of Paranoia, I had defeated The Computer." *** Your DM was a nutcase, the Computer has almost no logic in the first place, I tried that once and got my clone template erased and my clones vaporized. The Computer doesn't like people getting uppity, thoughts like that are traitorous and show that you want to overthrow it. * A critical success on a magic roll led to this troper's ''Unknown Armies'' players getting to the planned end-of-session showdown within half an hour or so of starting the game. Among the party's other offthe-rails exploits, they allied with the initial BigBad, beat up an envoy of the all-powerful conspiracy who ''had'' been about to apologise for their getting involved, hunted down an NPC StaffChick because she was dealing drugs, accidentally teleported themselves into the Australian outback and, on returning home, executed the latest BigBad with a hunting rifle. It's the most fun I've ever had as a GM. * This troper ({{ShotgunNinja}}) had a friend who pitted a high-level dragon against a level 3 party. The intent was to stop the fight after two rounds and have him be the main villain. A ranged character, unaware of this, tried to land a shot in the eye of the dragon rather than try to run like a sane player would. He pulled a natural 20 and it was an ''[[TrickArrow exploding]]'' arrow. Yeah. The DM had to scramble together a new villain. ** Oooh, that one happened to [[CapnAndy me]] too. I sent the BigBad at the players at a time when he grossly outlevelled them, to slap them around somewhat and sell the threat for later in the story when they could actually take him on. Three rounds and some absurdly lucky rolls later, my main villain was lying dead on the ground. The lesson here seems to be to never, ''ever'' give the [=PCs=] a HopelessBossFight. *** Happened in a ''{{Warhammer}} Fantasy'' game [[Sidhe3141 I]] was in too. The party was sent to battle an evil wizard who was almost certainly slated to become a recurring villain. We tracked him to his lair (wasn't hard) and started the combat. Then we rolled critical hits. Repeatedly. Once with a splash weapon. End result: BigBad dies before getting even one action (we had initiative). ** I had a DM who tried one of those too. Rather than making the villain especially ''strong'', though, he made him especially ''[[FragileSpeedster fast]]'', with a ton of abilities relating to movement and the capacity for a [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere Screw This I'm Outta Here]] when critically wounded. The party rogue snuck up behind him at the beginning of combat, and, without knowing anything about his capabilities, decided on a whim to slit his heels and impair his movement. Successful roll to hit, good tactics in the rest of the fight, and that entire thread of the campaign was prematurely ended.

Fortunately, the DM had thought up a bunch of factions in the region and was able to improvise a conflict between us and another one, so the campaign as a whole survived. * This troper was the DM for a campaign where the local {{Munchkin}} figured out a way to ''kill God'' (AKA me) and take over in his place. His character was a homicidal maniac, needless to say, carnage ensued. (It was hilarious to watch though) * This troper once ran a BESM 3.0 game where I planned out every little thing for the first night. After the players smashed those plans to bits, I didn't plan one single event the rest of the game. I made [=NPCs=] and had some sort of objective in place, and occasionally I would poke them with reminders to do that one task, but other than that I let them do whatever they wanted and rolled with it. It turned out to be a much better game, too. * This troper also was in a game where the DM had a giant, complex plot involving a mage tower. Basically we had to climb to the top of the mage tower in order to get an important item for a quest. The only problem was that the tower was split into two parts: outer and inner. And we couldn't just go up the middle, either, as the middle was covered in this slime that exploded on contact. So we climbed up the outside of the tower, which was partially destroyed, infested with goblins, and had no food in it. Oh, and we couldn't use magic, either, because the slime created an anti-magic field around the tower. So the cleric (me) and the sorcerer were completely useless as we climbed up, got tore up, and were barely alive when we reached the top. And the tower was HUGE, so it took a month to even get to the top. Once up there, we had to use a special process to set the slime on fire through a quarter-sized hole in the wall between the inner and outer sections, and we nearly blew up the tower doing so. However, we found out that there wasn't a door to the middle of the tower up here, and the DM wanted us to go all the way back down to the bottom, through the traps and goblins, and climb up again in the middle. The resulting conversation went something like this: (Also, it's worth noting that I always put quite a few spells into gaseous form, as that was my way of escaping if we got into a lot of trouble) ** Me: So we have our magic back now that we've destroyed the slime, right? ** DM: Right. ** Me: And there's a tiny hole in the wall, right? ** DM: Yes... ** Me: I case gaseous form on the whole party and we float through the hole. ** DM: ... I hate you so much right now. * I wasn't involved in the campaign, but this little anecdote has passed into the realms of legend in my group: during a ''{{D20 Modern}}'' campaign, the party had been assigned to meet the daughter of a corporate CEO to get some vital information out of her. All was proceeding in a civil manner until aforementioned daughter called one of the party members- a pretty, yet grumpy spy with a mean impulsive streak- a whore. The spy's snappy retort was in the form of a bullet to the brain. After the session was over, it turned out that the daughter was actually an assassin whose future actions would have

driven the next major plot arc. ''Whoops!'' (This was the incident that caused the DM to stop making notes before a game. As a result, a few sessions later [[BolivianArmyEnding hostile aliens suddenly invaded the Earth]].) * Another D&D example. To counter issues that had caused the campaign to be rebooted (several times...), the DM decided that this version of the game would be based out of a small town. Sounds good, right? Except for the town managing to grow to the size of a small city between sessions. Anyways, the party spies an army of some ten thousand orcs, goblins, ogres and Drow heading for the town/city. Realising that they didn't stand a chance, they returned to the town and caused a panic, resulting in the population fleeing. The [=PCs=] then burned the town down and fled with the contents of the treasury. The campaign ended on that session. ** Of course, then there was the one random exposition NPC who the party's Barbarian became bored with... so he chopped the NPC off at the knees. And he kept expositing... *** Portable Exposition Guy? Awesome! Did you keep him? * This DM tends to run two kinds of games, dungeons and cities. Dungeons are mapped out, but cities have about 5 sentences TOPS of planning. My all time low? There's a Gate at the bottom of a highsecurity prison, my players need to get there. The players then got one of the party convicted and sent to the wrong section of the jail (Or right, but who's counting), snuck several animal companions in, and released about half the inmates. Sadly, upon discovering the [[SealedEvilInACan maximum-security wing for the most horrible dark wizards]], they turned around. Ah the fun I may have had. But players know when to quit... Darn it... * An amusing example from online [=RP=]ing. One character propositioned mine, inviting them to some mysterious venue. My chracter agreed, unaware that they were being invited to an illegal underground {{FightClub}}. Specifically, they took my character straight into their main underground arena and then babbled on about exactly what it was and how awesome it was. Clearly the other player expected my character to be impressed and want to join up to them immediately. Instead, my character refused... which the other player was not prepared for. So, at a loss for what to do having just shown me the headquarters of the city's most wanted criminal organisation, the other player ''let my character walk away scott free''. They then had the gall to be surprised when my character went to the police... * This troper played in a [[WorldOfDarkness Vampire: The Requiem]] LARP where the intent of the [=ST=]s ([=GM=]s for those who aren't familiar with the lingo) was for the incompetent Prince of the domain to piss off a bunch of people, causing one of them to have an outburst, followed by the Hound (the Prince's bodyguard) beat the crap out of that person, and then the Prince leaving in ignorant disgust. What instead happened was everyone remained silent, with the tension slowly building until a character (who up until that point had pretended to be mute) stood up and shouted "Praxis" (for the uninitiated, basically it's announcing a ''coup d'etat''). Cue every single person in the room drawing weapons and/or frenzying. The result was that the Prince was torpored from the sheer amount of damage he

took, the Hound went into hiding, and a slightly less incompetent Prince took over. All in all, the STs managed to handle it fairly well. * This troper was playing a Masque of the Red Death campaign. Mistake one: the DM allowed us to play "Mundane" literary characters. This troper picked Sherlock Holmes, and a friend picked Watson - who was not the Nigel-style idiot that the GM was obviously expecting Mistake number two. The other characters are Dr. Seward from Dracula, Arsene Lupin (yes, the rivalry between Holmes and Lupin was ''epic'') - the latter was an Enemy Mine situation, someone was ruining Lupin's reputation, Holmes wants to catch the real criminal, and Dr. Seward was certain that it was Dracula behind the case and brought it to the two's attention. At a point, {{the Dragon}} had the group separated and Dr. Seward was held hostage, the GM obviously expected the party to surrender the McGuffin. One, Lupin refused to give up the item he nearly died for - throwing both the GM and the NPC off, and Watson proved he wasn't a twit by taking aim, and nailed {{the Dragon}} with a head shot! * When not playing with people he trusts to go with the story, this troper tries to avoid having rails at all. There are plot hooks, yes, but that's mostly the world carrying on from day to day like a real world would. At the moment, he's running a game that amounts to "You're modern-day people dropped into the post-apocalypse through cryogenics," and doesn't have a determined plot at all. There's a handful of predetermined events such as, "Eventually, they meet a tribe of survivors," and otherwise they make their own goals. It works nicely. * This troper has a friend he plays with regularly who is the all-time KING of both going OffTheRails and being a complete lunatic. First, let's note that he's very funny, so we mostly let him get away with it. Things he has done include: Throwing a severed dragon head at another dragon (crit hit later and the other dragon flies away in a panic), accidentally killing a dwarf in a bar fight BEFORE the bar fight began (trying to start a bar fight when you're a monk can be very dangerous), improvising a prayer to Boccob (best known as the uncaring, it had us rolling in laughter as he spoke lines such as "Oh great Boccob, who is up there rightly not giving a crap"), breaking a prison break wide open by faking a religious epiphany and flinging himself off the side of the prison boat ("He commands me... to SWIM!"), and breaking out into song at random intervals. * In one game my current GM ran, one of the players repeatedly went off the rails in various insane manners. One time, while on a diplomatic mission ( with diplomatic immunity ), he committed mass murder in a city wherein basically Superman was in residence. . . and then mouthed off at his trial. Result: one PC sent on a one-way trip into deep space. * This Troper was once part of an online RP that had started out with one or two people running the plot arcs and everyone else reacting to the Monster of the Week. During a lull in one of these plots she decided to hijack it for her own means, and when the player in charge tried to put the story back on rails, this troper turned it into a LensmanArmsRace of further plot derailment. We even came up with a

term for this, "monkey wrenching," and many of the ensuing plot arcs consisted of a ThirtyGambitPileup of each person trying to monkey wrench someone else's monkey wrench. ** This troper remembers being part of a online forum RP that turned into one of those. It became infamous among the surviving players as the one that ended up averaging five-to-seven plot twists per page (a page being twenty posts). A predictable result when everything ends up occurring simply because of {{rule of cool}}. * After weeks spent plotting out a city that was supposed to be important to the game, this troper's DM watched in horror as our party of three 5th-level gestalt characters completely obliterated it in a single session. Following this, he stepped up the difficulty level of the game ''significantly''--coming very, ''very'' close to TPK in more than a few instances. As one might be able to tell, he's still pretty bitter about it. * While not a D&D happening, this troper experienced a particularly troubling hour while playing Half Life 2. During the escape through the canals, there is one underground room where the player must turn a valve in order to raise the water level and go through a pipe that is normally 20 feet off the ground. This troper, being not particularly observant, used the contents of the room above to solve the puzzle, which happened to be some 15 barrels. The method was stacking them up in increasingly unstable towers, jumping up on them, going through the pipe, and then realizing that the ledge you needed to get to was 50 feet above water level. A good long headdesk was had after going to an online walkthrough. * This troper finds that letting his players go off the rails and just bounce off one another makes for an easier game- it requires a lot less planning. * This troper once spent an hour creating a level fifteen giant robot for his BESM d20 campaign buddies to beat down as the big boss. A group of level fours took it down with three hits, making the campaign incredibly anti-climactic. So I improvised and had the group trying to prevent a teen suicide by the creator of said giant robot. I almost made the boy jump because I was so bitter over the robot's demise. * This troper is currently playing in a forum RP. It started off relatively simply--a policewoman was chasing a suspect through a bad part of town. It ended up bringing in, in order: A terrified game-show host trying to find his way home, a werewolf with a SuperpoweredEvilSide--said superpowered evil side being a plant-based half-demon and ''eco-terrorist''--a psychic [[AGodAmI god-complexing]] woman in the midst of an [[NoOSHACompliance old slaughterhouse]] with a million and one twisty, ''rotating'' passageways, an AncientConspiracy, thousands of black ooze demons, and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking the policewoman's obnoxious partner.]] We haven't caught the thief yet, but we ''did'' succeed in turning the psychic lady into a time-controlling griffin. ** It's still going. We have now gone on a massive journey through a time-and-space-bending honeycomb of [[AirVentEscape ducts]], fought a borderline psychotic light dragon who believes that our half-demon eco-terrorist is his old archnemesis, [[OutrunTheFireball Outran The Fireball]], met a monk with a sarcastic [[TalkingAnimal talking golden

rooster]], and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking gone to an Italian restaurant.]] More fun is sure to follow! *** Please give a link to this. *** Is this from [[TheLandsOfEvelon Evelon]] by any chance? * [[ManCalledTrue This editor]] thinks something like this may have just happened in an online roleplay he's part of. The concept is that the Greco-Roman gods live among humanity, and the Titans just burst out of their prison. War is brewing. (Troper's character: the Titan Hyperion.) For the longest time, the gods outnumbered the Titans, so the GameMaster arranged for the two Titans currently in-game to summon the ArtificialHuman Spartoi, perfect warriors, as a first strike against the gods. That was when circumstances interfered - the game received a sudden flux of Titans, one of whom proceeded to defect to the gods's side, and none of whom were in on the Spartoi summoning; en masse, they decided they were against it. As a result, when the Spartoi arrived, ''everyone'' banded against them except this troper. Currently, the surviving Spartoi are in hiding, Hyperion is furious with his fellow Titans and their hypocrisy (they apparently only want war on ''their'' terms), and the storyline appears to be on the verge of falling apart. This troper will see what happens (and hopes he can kill that godawful {{Jerkass}} MartyStu Typhon). ** And the answer: the game sputtered, died, got a {{Reboot}}, and is now dead again. Damn it. * ThisTroper inadvertently caused the downfall of an online RP by going OffTheRails. However, the game will hopefully be getting a revival soon, [[strike:thankfully]] hopefully without the multitudes of [[MarySue Mary Sues]]. * This is the POINT of this Troper's weekly D&D game, loosely based off of Fate/Stay Night (in which all 7 players get a servant and have to kill each other to get the Holy Grail). This started as a fairly straight forward campaign, with all of the servants being the original ones... but eventually went [[OffTheRails off the rails]], leading to characters having servants such as [[NoMoreHeroes Travis Touchdown]], [[CodeGeass Lelouch Lamperouge]], {{Naruto}}, and [[DeathNote Light Yagami]]... all in one war. ** May I just say...Coolest MegaCrossover Ever? * ThisTroper was once creating the storyline for a freeform play-bypost event. The indestructible MacGuffin was hidden on a particular planet, and all sides were jockeying to find it. Unfortunately, ThisTroper forgot to allow for two things: a) the players had access to cosmic levels of power and b) some of them were quite monstrously amoral. The strategy of "If we vaporize the planet, the ''indestructible'' MacGuffin should be left floating unharmed in empty space, and thus easy to find" was arrived at in maybe ten minutes, sending the entire game OffTheRails. The game did manage to limp along for a while after that point, but the plot never quite recovered its momentum and it eventually ground to a halt. ** Do you have ''any idea'' how hard it would be to [[SciFiWritersHaveNoSenseOfScale find any object smaller than a celestial body floating in space?]] Would've been a good opportunity to punish your players for violent, destructive recklessness! *** Given that I mentioned that the players had access to (among many

other things) the Power Cosmic, the answer to your question is 'They could have found it with trivial ease'. There's also that since the entire point of the campaign was a race to gain control of the MacGuffin (which was effectively the Infinity Gauntlet, hence why everybody wanted it), ruling the damn thing to be irretreviably lost in space would have crashed the game anyway. * This troper's group, playing homebrew Hunters with two random superpowers each in the nWoD, were tasked with rescuing a small child from being kidnapped from school by the cronies of a vampire. We had been hopelessly incompetent thus far, and GM didn't intend us to succeed, expecting an epic-level car chase ending with the death of the kid and some serious trouble on our necks. Some epic ass-kicking later, where we were totally unarmed except for pepper spray and the thugs all had [=SMGs=] or worse, we escaped with five total party HitPoints left, a completely unharmed kid, and four thugs waking up some hours later in the trash. My character still carries the guns. ** The same troper, upon discovering a CEO's pedophiliac proclivities, proceeded to mail the evidence directly to the police instead of using it for blackmail. * [[{{Blayde}} This Troper]]'s Superhero group has recently gone off the rails. During a charity ball thrown by one of the players, the DM brought in a [[LuddWasRight Doc-Ock knockoff with a squad of killer robots to drop in from the roof.]] Strangely, I was the only one attacking the Bots, while the rest of the party used a variety of tactics involving Gravity Manipulation, a swan ice-sculpture and an Animate Object power, and shooting lightning into the resultant puddle. While the villain was attempting his Skyward get-away, the Cyborg-PC fires a concussion missile at the guy and crits. By that setting's rules, a crit with a concussion missile is a stun, and the guy fell to the ground to be arrested by the authorities. Everyone excluding the Cyborg realizes that the GM was intending for a VillainExitStageLeft. Having run out of bad guys, the GM brought us to a sandwich shop and we ended the session there before holiday break. * This troper is the proverbial penny on the track to his local group. Part of it is Rule of Funny, part of it is a... slight tendency toward competition between a couple of us. In a Star Wars game, when we were searching for a MacGuffin, the GM dropped a transport full of troops on us, expecting us to run. The response? "Move object. I slam it into the ground. Until something goes boom." And then there was the one and only dungeon-crawl we've ever done. It was supposed to be an artificial labyrinth, built for the amusement of the Corrupt Nobility of the land. The sentient monsters were talked into fighting the nonsentient monsters for us until it stopped being funny. This was over halfway through the dungeon, and the top three scariest things there were all fighting for the party. There was an attempt to invoke the Rule of the Practicable Breach; unfortunately, this being a medieval setting, it hadn't been invented yet. It WILL be the next time that game is run, god damn it. * When I ran a StarWars [[AlternateUniverse Infinities]] campaign, I managed to avoid a lot of OTR moments by running a lot of sessions blind. I would prepare ''nothing'' except a basic idea of what they needed to accomplish, not to mention that one of my players is also a

Star Wars GM and has read all of [=WotC=]'s prepared adventures. * A prison escape plot in [[SapphireFlame this troper's]] RuleOfCoolbased Space Opera forum RP got derailed when I decided to reveal {{the Dragon}}, a normally calm and collected person who suffers from bouts of UnstoppableRage because she was forced to suppress her emotions. For context, the character was a weapons scientist from an advanced civilization that got stranded there from a teleporter malfunction, which should tell you how seriously the RP takes itself. What I expected: The escapee (who managed to come up with clever evasions thus far) to manage to get away. What I got: Said character nearly pissed his pants at her sheer scariness and surrendered. After a few more posts where the character was forced to use his weapons knowledge for the army that captured him, he finally decided it wasn't going anywhere and [[AssPull Ass pulled]] the opposing side finding out about his talents and busting him out. * ThisTroper DM'ed a solo game of ''Shadowrun'' where the hero's [[LikeBrotherAndSister not-girlfriend]] was kidnapped by a Prince of Tir Tairngire as a scheme to lure him into the Tir to rescue her, where he could be put into position and framed for certain terrorist acts, as the PC was the "black sheep" scion of a Tir na Nog noble family. The villain even sent him a ''plane ticket'', and a gun permit to legally bring his weapons through customs! The player's response? To [=HALO=] jump into the Shasta Preserve from 20,000 feet, swim five miles upriver, and infiltrate the home of the ''Great Dragon Hestaby''. To ask for her ''help''. [[spoiler:He got it, too.]] * This Troper's entire online forum-based RP is based off this. To wit: alien makeovers, the Second Coming, "You want to see a monster? Go see my sister" and "Olive juice, olive juice, Mytho it tastes like CRAPPY MUFFINS!" You kind of had to be there. * This troper expects his players to, but they don't. On the other hand, every single game he's been in has been OffTheRails from the moment he was in it. In a certain game, his city was under a dictatorship, and he decided to join the resistance. After a bit of time in the resistance, he got a job in the dictatorship as a spy. He spent his nights murdering guards (he was an Assassin), until he offered a fellow party member as the murderer to the guards (The dwarven fighter with the admantine full plate, or for non-D&D players, the character most unlikely to actually sneak), got on their good side, and managed to off both the leader of the resistance and the leader of the dictatorship, even though they were both a few levels higher than him. Mega pwn is mine. :) * This troper is part of a Pokmon role playing forum. One day, two of her friends decided to start role playing in a thread on the beach. One of the characters is basically obsessed with money, and the other has just lost her backpack that contains... well, everything she owns, pretty much. The money-obsessed one found the backpack and is attempting to sell it back to the owner. Relatively normal, right? Then they asked this troper to join. First, a [[GratuitousJapanese Wapanese]] Blastoise appeared with a posse of Squirtle who were similarly Wapanese. This Blastoise was named... DeusExMachina, and was occasionally purposefully typo'd as "Desu ex Machina". They instantly thought [[DracoInLeatherPants the con artist was hot and kind]] and

that the girl was a selfish jerk who was trying to steal said man from Deus ex Machina. Oh, ''and'' they decided that the girl was gay for Deus ex Machina. After that, it really went downhill. Long story short, the second-in-command Zenigame drove a car out from behind a rock that had kanji painted on the side and started playing the Darth Vader Imperial March. Then, Deus ex Machina abducted both the con artist and the backpack and forced the girl to come along, too. Zenigame proved to be a terrible driver, Deus ex Machina fell out of the car, got run over by the car and died, got resurrected as [[OurZombiesAreDifferent "Zombie ex Machina"]], the girl somehow got labeled as the great god "Kawaii Desu Ne-sama", Zenigame became evil and started unleashing "yami" into the world through the girl's backpack, the girl and the con artist fell down a crevice in the cliff and landed in the water, they met a woman who was hounding Deus ex Machina for [[GrammarNazi butchering both English and Japanese]] (said character also [[BreakingTheFourthWall yelled at the narrator for her atrocious grammar and spelling]])... yeah. It's safe to say that the end result was ''not'' what the original two role players intended. (Fortunately, they loved it.) ** [[CrowningMomentOfFunny I cannot express in words how badly I want the link to this. ]] *** ...though you need to register to see it, [[http://torrenta.proboards.com/index.cgi?action=display&board=thearch ive&thread=12951&page=1 this is it.]] * This Troper (Tropers/GalenDev) and a friend managed to murder a ''Shadowrun'' game. Earlier in the campaign, we had somehow managed to release the ancient Egyptian god Seth. Later, when confronted by Seth, my character and my friend's managed to convince Seth that he could get all the information he wanted online, so Seth jumped into the Internet. Cue the terrified cries of otaku everywhere. * This Troper (Kasu) has a weekly D&D 3.5 game that he and his friends play. While the normal games are lighthearted spinoffs of FateStayNight mashed up with other anime and video game series, the one time his DM tried to play a normal, serious game with actual plot, everybody either ended up in jail, insane, or both. For example: one character walked into the game late as a Mad Neutral (read: crazy to begin with) character who took everything literally. While confronted with a guard who said "I'll keep an eye on you.", he ''stole his eye'' out of the socket. Everything just went downhill from there. * This troper was recently part of a group that played a game under d20 rules in a "mystery setting". It start with the four [=PCs=] escorting a pretty blantant MarySue through a dungeon. My character (me having an inkling of the setting) romanced her as we decended, and upon finding a "blighted angel feather" in an obvious ambush, the character cut off the GM's expalination by grabbing it, looking at the NPC, and reciting [[ValkyrieProfileCovenantofthePlume "Feather o'er the battlefield, unto me thy power yeild!"]] A curbstomp boss encounter and dead story-critical NPC later, another character suggested abusing this power (deadly upgrades for those close to the plume user) by romancing someone else from town and using them as a failsafe for dungeon looting. Fortunately, the GM ''loved'' the idea, and what followed was a mass of sequence-breaking involving many

sacrifices, gay priestesses, MacGuffins sold for profit, TheDragon doing a HeelFaceTurn and become the lesbian lover of Lenneth (who the party had already robbed blind and conned into contract work as a stripper), and general jerkassery as everyone amassed more treasure to buy increasingly large estates on impulse. It culimated in an encounter with a very pissed-off Hel; the [=PCs=] proceeded to use the Plume on themselves to logic-bomb her (She brings out the true potential of a soul to enhance the feather-user, but can't take the feather-users souls, but has to take a soul to end the effect...) then striding out of the dungeon in permanent god mode, singing "Gives You Hell" for good measure (yes, we all actually sang the song aloud). It was ''awesome''. * ThisTroper is part of a D20Modern game, where psionics exist but magic does not. While our party was training their psychic abilities in a sort of training facility at the top floor of an office building, the building was suddenly invaded by terrorists and rigged with explosives. After some coersion, our party decides to disarm the bombs and foil the terrorist plot - however, after a few run-ins with the terrorsts, we found ourselves cornered by ''fifty of them''. (Our GM at random makes rolls for whether something great or something terrible happens. Guess which one this was.) Our GM expected that, with a great deal of luck, we might be able to escape alive. He failed to consider that the basement was loaded with bombs, our characters were tactically smart enough to know which bombs wouldn't bring the building down, and that one of us was a pyrokinetic. One controlled explosion and a few van rammings later, we emerged victorious from an encounter that we should have ''lost our lives trying to escape''. * This troper was playing a fantasy setting the GM created in 3.5. It culminated in a battle with the dragon, a giant demon. During the opening monologue, he turned around to grab his sword off the [[ChekhovsGun earlier mentioned rack]]. Unfortunately for the GM, I was running a 10th level Arcane archer, and had happened to actually prepare the death arrow a couple of sessions back. The GM also forgot to add any special rules regarding the fortitude saves for the demon, which he promptly failed. Fortunately, he just had the BigBad show up to break the tension. * This troper heard of a story where the GM had planned out an epic battle between the party and a band of werewolves. Unfortunately, among the party was a werewolf slayer who, combining his bonuses against werewolves with several excellent rolls, proceeded to kill the leader of the werewolf band, intended to be an epic boss, in a single blow. The GM scrapped the plan on the spot and had the werewolves scurry off into the night, demoralized by witnesses their leader being so easily disposed of. * [[UnknownKnaight This troper]] has seen quite a few, due to simulating honest mistakes on the enemy parts, then having the players pull some genius move. The best example is probably a robot game of mine. First they get poison gassed, then communication blocking paint(no effect, autonomous robots) is painted all over the room. The players all simultaneously freeze, so of course the enemies think it works, and roll out, then proceed to be annihilated with a sudden surprise burst of fire.

* This troper's GM, upon starting a World of Warcraft d20 campaign, basically said "There are no tracks. You tell me what happens." Most of the group did normal things for their race/class; the bear was stupid and smashed things, the Forsaken warlock plotted to conquer the world. The Fel character started a cult based on [=LOLcats=] and YuGiOhTheAbridgedSeries, and the Tauren druid became Undercity's greatest disc jockey. ** Then there was the StarWars campaign. Our first mission? Negotiate peace between two iffy political factions during the period just after ''Return of the Jedi'', with some remnants of the Empire still in action fighting rebels and so forth. Our actual activity? ''Hijacking a Star Destroyer, painting it electric blue, and turning it into a traveling city.'' * This troper is part of a BESM campaign based on the manga ''Fairy Tail''. Everything was going fine until a session where our characters were forcibly switched bodies with a group of mages in prison and told to break out before we were executed in three days. The characters had worked together a plan until it seemed like the warden was going to betray us, at which point one of the characters, a janitor linked to a [[LawfulStupidChaoticStupid primal entity of justice]] switched to his battle form and touched off a riot for being 'betrayed'. And then as the GM tried to get things back under control by sending in twenty guards with machine guns. Another character rolled a natural 20 and his attempted soul-punch stun attack turned into a slaughter of all 20 innocent guards, complete with exploding heads. In the aftermath of this accidental mass murder, the GM just sort of stared for a moment and then ended the session for the night. We still don't know how he plans to fix it. ** The GM still doesn't know how he's going to fix it either. *** The mission was finally brought to and end--months after the original session. The Lawful Stupid justice entity fought the accidental-murderer to a standstill. Finally the murderer surrendered after giving another player some cryptic message. Lawful Stupid punched him really hard, dropping him to negative HP, but not killing him. His wrath abated, the [=PCs=] were led outside by the surviving prison guards, where the Warden tried to kill them--by turning into a giant Sea Serpent (turns out that the Warden had eaten cursed Sea Serpent eggs and suffered the fate of being transformed into the Serpent's new offspring) The PC's beat him, but not before accidental murderer got killed and half eaten. And then they got all their original bodies back. **** Also the murderer got to live again because he had ''freaking reincarnation'' since level seven. * This troper was part of a Star Wars Campaign, set in the period between "Revenge of the Sith" and "A New Hope". My character was an advanced battledroid, with build in jetpack, grappling hooks, hidden arms, etc. To 'encourage' the party to form in a cantina in Mos Eisley, the DM sent a squad of Stormtroopers into the cantina, and we were supposed to exit via the back door. Upon seeing the Storm Troopers, my droid stood up, and fired everything I had, across a full cantina. The resulting firefight saw all the troopers killed, half the cantina dead or dying, the other party members horribly injured, all

the musicians gunned down, and as my droid picked its way through the blood and burned bodies, I shot the barkeeper in the head after he said he'd never let a droid in his cantina again. * This troper was part of a forum RPG in which several of her teammates had been captured and taken to an island off the coast of Belize that was heavily guarded. Being a scuba diver in real life, she had the group search the waters around the island for sinkholes connecting to the ocean, though which a successful underwater/underground assault was eventually launched. * This troper wrote a healthy section of her 3.5 campaign around splitting the (exceptionally large) party into two groups. When faced with splitting as a way of accomplishing their goals faster, the party downright refused. Instead, they accomplished the tasks in doubletime, then split up later, AFTER the point I had in mind for them to come back together in the first place. ** It should also be noted that the same group later used their connections with one of the god-like beings of the world to completely circumvent the moral dilemma I was planning in the endgame. * Our GM had our characters starting as failed mercenaries and later gaining mystical powers in a fantasy world where player characters usually can't use magic ({{Praedor}}). My character could make things happen by poetry; other characters had powers such as a commanding animals, changing probabilities or being able to draw things to existence. After having begun to mine a high-explosive -like substance, which exploded if in contact with air and tapped hard (and IIRC was also anti-magical), we were attacking the city in which most of the wizards lived. Their ships were coming down along the river, when the character who could draw drew a 50-meter tall peak of the explosive out of the middle of the river, right in front of the fleet. We were expecting a huge explosion that would probably wipe out all the ships and at least part of the city, but that we would probably live through. After a ship hit the stuff, the GM put the game on a pause, and after 15 minutes, basically told us "I'm sorry, that's the end of the campaign". Turns out, the explosive was actually the [[BloodyMurder life]]-[[MadeOfExplodium stuff]] of a demon-goddess, living in the mountains hundreds of kilometers away, and that all the veins of it were connected to her... and that she was basically composed of a [[ApocalypseHow few cubic kilometers of the stuff]]. Still, one of the coolest game sessions ''ever'', and points for the GM for sticking to his worldview, even if the campaign ended some sessions before it was supposed to. * This Troper just got through running a MAJOR off the rails session. Tonight's session was the ninth session, and was planned to be a Wham Episode- introduce the major recurring enemies, put some scare into my players (all of the enemies were 4 to 6 levels higher than my 2 PC's, and they had an army of monsters with them), maybe kill off some of they're allies (they were starting to acquire a entourage- they had about fifty people working for them). Things didn't go as planned. Through use of some clever and insane gaming (which was totally incharacter) one of my players managed to blow up the entire city, killing every single important enemy except the leader and ALL of they're own allies (who were, admittedly, mostly mind controlled).

What was my other player doing while all of this happened? TRYING TO ASSASSINATE THE END BOSS. I'm looking forward to next week. ** I'll go ahead and do another one. It took place in a modernish, very dark, serious setting with three players out for they're own goals (not a party). One of my players, who was an incredibly powerful gunman, was hired as a body guard by my other sly, manipulative player who was playing as a mobster. There was a young foreign female NPC who had ended up with the mobster and was apparently the key to the big secret of the story, and he was trying to learn it. Long story short, the mobster gets into an ambush while his bodyguard is alone with the girl. They run away and escape, and the girl asks him to take her to meet a powerful businesswoman who runs a the most powerful business in the city and has her own military force (think Shinra). Now, right away everyone knows this is a really BAD idea, as she's shown signs of being very dangerous and ruthless and has been searching for the foreign girl. But the Player, who's character was also from out of the city, knew nothing about her, so he had no reason not to go. They go in, she turns on them and takes the girl away to be slaughtered (to harvest the magic item within her body) while the businesswoman agrees to pay my Player. But, since he's basically a nice guy, he decides to try to save her. He yanks out the businesswoman's gun, puts it to her head, and escapes into her elevator. Everyone starts laughing, and my player looks around oblivious. So to try to explain it to him, I tell him "You just skipped to the End Boss- and took her hostage." That was some very good times, and led to one of the best off the rails situations I've ever been in. * This troper once agreed to DM a pickup group through the original ''Ravenloft'' module. Everything started out just fine, until the players somehow managed to climb up to a ''supposedly'' inaccessible balcony in an early room of the castle. They therefore cut straight to the end, fought the BigBad while they were still at full strength (instead of being weakened by previous encounters), and defeated him pretty easily. They then proceeded to explore the rest of the castle in reverse order, using the cool new weapons they got from defeating the final Boss first. It was a freakin' bloodbath. But funny. * I once ran a single-player [=DnD=] campaign set in the equivalent of ancient Egypt in the middle of a civil war. It was a conflict between the Pharaoh-Emperor who wanted to institute some big reforms, marry his commoner childhood friend, and wipe out the opposition, the alliance of priests and nobles who wanted to overthrow him and install a puppet ruler, and a band of rebels who wanted both groups dead. While I fully expected the player to join one of the groups, he instead proceeded to unite the nobles and the rebels in an unlikely pact and install himself as the leader of the combined group. This turned a one-player campaign into an improvised wargame simulation. After having lost, he took those who remained loyal to him, took them to another continent and founded a new city. Then the game turned into an equaly improvised Civilization simulator before turning into a wargame again when he came back after 30 years to claim his revenge. I have never been so happy to have my plans ruined. * GuestOfDishonour: I did this a long time ago on TheMassiveMultiFandomRPG. It was Gulliver Day, aka the Day everybody's

ages got changed, which was mostly used for some wacky humour. [[NeonGenesisEvangelion Rei Ayanami]] (my character) on the other hand, had become initiated into the ranks of the Devil Summoners and was tasked with fighting off a collection of corrupt AIs that were attacking the City, one of them being a giant purple elephant whose personality was like a cross between [[BlazBlue Bang Shishigami]] and '''{{BRIAN BLESSED}}'''. [[CanonDisContinuity It was not fondly remembered]]. * [[{{tzecco}} This troper]] remembers a game where one annoying player was throwing the already-off-the-rails adventure off-the-rails in another, less favored direction. The other PC's reaction? They killed the newbie and ate him. The GM approved and turned it somehow into a way to get them temporarily back onto the rails. * [[{{Griffin}} This troper]] once [=GMed=] a {{GURPs}} {{Discworld}} game with some of her friends who were new to both roleplaying and Discworld. This resulted in such oddities as one character refusing to go on the expedition, and the ignoring of the Plot Hook. Nonetheless, we had fun doing it. * [[TheLandsOfEvelon Evelon]] seems well-suited to this trope. This troper has had a date-type RP turn into a battle with a crazy villain (twice), as well as a day at an amusement park resulting in the characters having to flee from an angry mob. * This troper inadvertently got a DM's plot derailed by one simple fact: her Paladin character is gay. Longer version: DM is in love with Tragic Romances and had an ubervamp lord (more awesome then Strahd, you know the drill) in the wings, and had planned on having some innocent newly fledged vampiress fall in love with the Paladin, Paladin love her back tried to cure her, etc. Only problem again Pally likes men. The DM's sheer insistence to railroad us into this plot eventually led the Anchorite to drown and burn the fledgling vampire at once, and effectively cause him to abandon the plot. What's worse is that we had a bard who had a terrible weakness for the ladies who would have been a better fit! * I recently ran a D&D session where a new player joined and I had to figure out a way to introduce the new character to the rest of the party, who was in jail. So the new player decided to be extremely difficult and insisted on knowing why he was in jail. After a few minutes of arguing I just gave up and said that he has been arrested for Jaywalking. Much to the delight of the other players. Cue many jokes being made regarding this, including the implication that Jaywalking was worse than mass murder, rape and arson combined. ** Of course, this was only a taste of what was to come as later on I was setting up a Lich to be a recurring villain and was trying to set up an EnemyMine. The Lich had become one by backstabbing a cult and stealing the components (lots of filled soulstones) from them. So instead of temporarily joining the Lich and stopping the Cult from opening a portal from the Nine Hells and dooming all existence, they decided to [[FaceHeelTurn JOIN THE LICH AND TAKE OVER THE WORLD!]] All because they felt slightly miffed that the Magistrate decided to hold them for a few days for questioning when people started mysteriously dying the day they showed up in the starting city. Needless to say, from that point on I stopped writing the plot out ahead of time since

I had no idea what they were going to decide to do next. * This troper, playing a very, very grey mind trick-specialized Jedi in Star Wars game, had as a mission to obtain some medical data from an Imperial facility. Underway, we killed a few Stormtroopers... and came across an Imperial shuttle. A quick series of mind-tricks, an atmo-venting and a hyperspace jump later, we had sold the orbiting Star Destroyer to the Rebellion and set ourselves up as crime lords. * This troper recently played a game of D&D involving pickling dead kobolds in wine, scaring off an entire room full of goblins by kicking down the door while holding two flaming kobold heads on spears (nearly causing the death of the party by adding two rooms worth of enemies together), having the BigBad being insta-killed first round of combat due to the rogue's sneak attack critical from 9 squares away, said rogue sneaking into combat and cutting off the BigBad's head (while still in combat), said rogue running away by himself to claim the reward for the quest, and the two remaining players burning down the mayor's mansion to search for him. * In a 3.5 [=DnD=] campaign this troper's party decided to agree to serve the current villain instead of fighting our way through his underlings. DM was forced to fly by the seat of his pants and turned a planned epic battle against a dragon into a drinking contest against a dragon. We won but my (at the time level 5 or 6 human female chaotic neutral wizard) character ended up in a drunken stupor, woke up in bed with the dragon (who was a polymorph) and the female sacrifices for the dragon and is now pregnant with the dragon's offspring. ** And now a couple of weeks later due to some UNBELIEVABLE rolls and pure batshit crazy my party now has the [[{{hitchhikersguidetothegalaxy}} infinite improbability drive]] a small creature that can eat almost anything and [[{{Futurama}} craps dark matter]] and a shard of a [[{{reddwarf}} white hole]] that we made go poof and after all of this we still managed to throw off the DM by (again) going along with the enemy instead of fighting them. * "I hate you all," is my gaming group's DM's CatchPhrase. No matter what the poor sap does, we always manage to go OffTheRails. After getting frustrated with us, she had a game where we were supposed to sit around and do nothing, and just to prove her point, we looted the town we were in, got arrested, and narrowly escaped execution after killing the guards. * This troper is in a group of five, he and his friend alternate the position of GM. The group ordinarily plays 3.5e or Star Wars with homebrew sprinkled quite a bit. This troper is the on the spot GM who never plans too far ahead, so it's a vague mission driven by the characters. The aformentioned friend is a planner type, who is probably a better paced GM, but this troper can almost always remember certain things that make hard things easily bypassed. ** Example 1: Critical Hit Defensive Stance Smite with Weapon of the Deity on a +5 Holy Flaming Burst Sword. The main bad guy failed his fortitude save to not die. Number of hits to kill: 1. ** Example 2: This troper saw one of the bad guys with the InfinityPlusOneSword and the Infinity Plus One Armor, both of which were supposed to be encountered far later in the campaign. This troper is a duskblade with an invisibility ring, a familiar and dimension

hop. He had his familiar turn invisible and steal the armor and sword at the same time by dimension hopping through the window and they never even found out. ** Example 3: The group had found a gem that had spells that could be used that was supposably important, but had a high Use Magic Device DC. This troper argued the item was worthless since nobody could use it. However, there was a cave at a certain mountain that had a large enemy encampment. This troper recalled that the stone had earthquake. So, much to the despair of the local druid and GM, the group passed it around until someone made the DC to collapse the mountain on the dragon and the encampment. * [[YueRyong This Troper]] has had two fairly major incidences in his gaming career, both with the same (normally unflappable) DM/ST, and both originating in [[SelfDeprecation (semi-)]] good in-character reasons that somehow built into runaway train effects when others in the party decided to run with it. ** The first took place in a now long-passed D&D 3.5 game, where the group were playing as pirates and this Troper had been a slave rescued by the (NPC) Captain. Given a new lease on life by his new hero, this Troper played the character as having an almost as slavish relationship with the Captain as he might have had with a genuine slave owner. So... when the NPC Captain was revealed to be the big bad of the campaign and the party were marooned on a desert island with nothing but a gun and a single bullet, this Troper's character took that as a command and shot himself... At which point, the ''entire rest of the crew'' (apart from the people who became the eventual stars of the overall campaign), decided to follow suit and ''shoot themselves in the head. '''Including the brand new lizardman character who was there to replace a dead PC and who had lived on the island HIS ENTIRE LIFE.''''' Throughout the rest of the campaign, the party heard rumours of the mysterious 'Suicide Island', which drove men to take their own life for no reason whatsoever. ** More recently, this Troper was playing in a cross-line oWoD game (as a [[MagetheAscension Mage]], as it happens), when he got caught up in the [[StartofDarkness origin story]] of one of the [[QuirkyMinibossSquad Seven Sins]], and felt immensely guilty for failing to prevent her [[UsedToBeASweetKid corruption]] and [[PsychopathicManchild subsequent insanity]]. Therefore, when they finally caught her and were able to bring her back to the crosssupernatural group they were working for, it was was a substantial weight off of his mind. Then while chasing after another one of the antagonists, the Big Bad decided to tempt the [[GreyandGrayMorality PCs]] with an offer of joining his side (in a pre-arranged plot point to have one specific PC become Pride, the final sin - although two of the others were already dead by then)... revealing in the process that the captive this Troper had worked so hard (and ineffectually) to try and save was currently being tortured, mind raped and experimented upon in ways rather reminiscent of {{Elfen Lied}}. Naturally, this Troper's character was less than happy, and his almost-immediate decision to accept the Big Bad's dog-kicking requirement to switch sides fit neatly enough (they even had a couple of Sin slots going spare!)... except that this Troper was not only the one carrying the

macguffin that gave the players any chance at all of stopping the big bad's plans and his betrayal somehow persuaded one of the other player characters to also flip sides and leave the sole party member with a relevant {{Karma Meter}} to fight the (functionally unkillable) Sin alone. We've yet to see how this plays out. The ST has however admitted that we only seem to have pre-empted his plans, rather than completely wrecking them, and at the very least our new characters have managed to survive... mostly. *** This troper is also a player in this game and has been witness to the after effects of this event. This troper was the player of the original Mokole (were-dinosaur) who was set to defect and take the place of Pride on the Sins team. Recently our new characters and the rest of the team got into a bit of a scuffle with Gluttony, one of the defected players, who was a massively powered up Brujah (Vampire). Gluttony tricked us into thinking she was an ally of ours and led us to a safehouse, where we were attacked by a SWAT team in the 65th storey penthouse. After narrowly beating them our team heard violence in the panic room of the safehouse and ripped it open to find the brutally murdered corpse of our ally... Who proceeded to laugh, stand up and reveal she'd been Gluttony all along. Cue asskicking, during which our Mummy is reduced to a fine ash, our new Brujah Leader is knocked out several times, our Mage holy knight is sliced in half, our Mage tinkerer knocks himself out cold with paradox and our Giovanni (Vampire) team mate is dusted. After beating gluttony the remaining SWAT members turn their guns on us and in a panic (because I was very close to losing my arms, house ruled Promethean) I spray the room with my arm mounted chain gun... and take all five of them down. Our leader stands up again next turn leaving just Me, Him and a zombie the Giovanni left as a parting gift (who has been following me slowly around the room due to a sloppy command of "Attack the girl." I named him Chairman Shambles), so we grab the unconscious party members, any obvious supernatural toys and left as quickly as possible due to approaching police sirens. That's one down... * One recent Star Wars game I ran had the characters (2 Jedi, a Soldier and a Techie) assigned to investigate an outlying planet that had been taken over by an unknown armada. I give them the basic outline of the city with four areas they could approach in different ways. The plan was to have them find out that the occupiers were hiring freelance freighter crews and get them to sign on in order to spy on them. So the Techie decides that he wants to go to the slums and buy drugs. And the Jedi go along with it. When I managed to push them back onto their mission, they get approached by somebody wanting to hire them. So the Jedi decide to Mind Trick him into leaving them alone. What made this especially frustrating is that the players didn't seem to have any idea as to what they actually wanted to do or accomplish. I can deal with leaping off the rails if they actually ''do'' something. * In the first game I DM'd, a player kept trying to run the game off the rails despite the lack of rails, insisting on digging new entrances to the dungeons, insisting that I couldn't dictate what a reflex s tr much less damge) and demanding that I follow the rules in the book up to, and including, only charging list priced for items,

despite the high cost of weapons being a plot point (they had their stating ger. He just wanted a backpack full of spares). I droped a meteor on him. * MadWritter: I accidently caused a short "off-the rail event". I was playing a superhero game on a internet form. The plot had a superhero, Queen Pace, giving up to the police. I forget to mention that Queen Pace was a hero in from the police, but it did allow me to have chance to have a chase event with a mobster. Thought it ended up with them figuring out that Queen Pace was a superhero. * Almost literal example: During a D&D session, the heroes were on a train, when the big bad caused rocks to fall onto the rails, meaning we either had to blast them off somehow or die. One of the guys in our group noticed that there was a junction ahead - leading to an unfinished bridge. Earlier in the game, the wizard in our group had aquired a book of spells, among them being a levetation spell. Three turns: First turn, the wizard speed-taught ''everyone'' a basic levetation spell. Second turn, the resident ninja hung on to the side of the train, and threw a knife at the track switch. The DM rolled the dice and, much to his annoyance, just managed to hit it. Third turn, everyone used the levetation spell at the exact same time. They all worked. [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/SugarWiki/CrowningMomentOfAwes ome?from=Main.CrowningMomentsOfAwesome So we made the train levetate across the canyon, going at full speed, until it hit the other side of the unfinished bridge, and continued on its way.]] Dont believe me? Ask the DM. He was '''furious'''. * This Troper has driven several DMs mad with these. In one D&D 3.5 game, I was running a crazy psuedonatural ozze-human hybrid warlock thing (we never did figure out what that character's creature type was). This town had a werewolf problem, but rather than figure out why the werewolves were mad at the villagers, we decided to just kill them. We didn't realize at the time that the head werewolf was a druid with 10 levels on us at the time ofcourse, so there we went at nightfall into the forest to find the werewolves. We found our way to their cave, to find a dire weasel, that druid's animal companion, guarding the entrance. Rather than attacking it head on, because we were trying to keep the element of surprize, we took a piece of steak, drenched it in distilled dwarven ale, and tossed it to the weasle. It sniffed it, then ate the steak. We repeated this with a piece of ham, and the weasle rolled a natural 1 on its fortitude save. It was out like a light. We sent the rogue in to scout the cave; it was small, only two chambers, but there was a pair of werewolf druids. In order to distract them, I stood outside the cave and sang about the joys of polution while being an abomination on to nature. They wolves came running out to destroy me, but between my head start and flight, I kept them occupied for long enough for the rest of the party to turn over the cave and come to my rescue. We then returned to town to find that the head werewolf had the mayor tied up, but now he was completely hammered thanks to his empathetic link to the weasle. We defeated him easily, and the DM manage to rerail us. The next session we learned of the existance of thirteen McGuffins that could destroy the world. Naturally, we attempted to find them for this very purpose

rather than stop this from occuring. The game never recovered, as several months later we succeeded. ** In a different game, I was running a wizard and the DM from the last game was running a druid. We were on an epic quest to retrieve the [[McGuffin Mystic Axe of Plot Advancement]] for the [[OurDwarvesAreAllTheSame Dwarven King]], but we happened to hate his guts because rather than pay us for the last job, he sent us on this one. Unfortunately, when we got to the retrieval point, we found it to have been stolen by [[OurGoblinsAreDifferent goblins]]. We weren't being paid to steal it back from the goblins, so we let all the dwarves stationed at that outpost go in alone. A little while later, we realized that we could pawn the Axe of Plot Advancement for way more than we were being paid, so we went into the goblin caves to get it. At one point we encountered a wall made of wood. We were suppose to find the lever than opened it, but we figured [[DungeonBypass 'Hey, its just wood,']] and tour it down. Our DM was understandably angry, but he was flexable enough to roll with it, and he recycled that part of the dungeon later. After passing a midboss, a cast iron door closed behind us, and we had no way of getting back through. A few rooms later, we come across an addimantine bridge over [[ConvectionSchmonvection chasm filled with magma]]. The [[BigBad BBEG]] comes through a door on the other side to taunt us with the axe. He then hacks a huge gap in the bridge with the axe. I gust of wind a spray of magma up, and the druid gust of winds it onto the BBEG. The DM [[AssPull asspulls]] out a magic bubble that protects him from the magma and stops convections, but is still is air permmiable. Naturally, the druid casts create water on the magma, and the BBEG is promptly steam cooked. Then I webbed across the break in the bridge, and road a floating disk up to the axe so I could mage hand it away. We still couldn't get out, but a few rooms later we came across those dwarves we sent to their deaths being enslaved. After freeing them, one of them showed us how to activate the axe so it cut through stone like butter. Then we returned to the steel door, and dug around it, bypassing that same section of dungeon a second time, and disappearing from dwarven lands. That game ended right there. * This troper was involved in a Joint Crisis Committee in his school's Model United Nations. The scenario was 2006, Sri Lanka vs. LTTE, and LTTE had just captured a village ravaged by malaria. The Crisis Room intended LTTE to airdrop supplies of quinine and food to keep the hostages alive. This troper convinced the whole delegation of 15 that it'll be easier to strap bombs to them and bomb the Sri Lankan capital. The Crisis Room thus brought in a 300,000 strong army from China, Russia and Pakistan to invade Sri Lanka and to maintain peace. We convinced India that they had to respond in order to maintain the balance of power in Asia, turning a war for independence into a 4-way battle. Then we brought in the UN, claiming that the Coalition was conducting genocide, and took over their bases in Northern Sri Lanka and Southern Sri Lanka. By the time India left, the LTTE had enough weapons and soldiers to blitz through Sri Lanka to take over it, leaving the capital of Sri Lanka, Colombo, for the last day. ** Of course, the Crisis Room wasn't happy, and told us on the last day that after lunch, both LTTE and Sri Lanka could bring in allies

from different universes. Sri Lanka brought in the whole Halo Universe, including an army of Spartans. This troper volunteered to sacrifice his lunch to draw up a list on the whiteboard, which was wheeled to the Crisis Room. It consisted of: --> The whole Marvel Universe, including characters like {{Deadpool}}, the Joker, Spiderman, etc. --> The whole pantheon of Greek gods and demi-gods. --> The [[{{Discworld}} citizens of Ankh-Morpork]]. -->[[{{Hitman}} Agent 47]] -->[[HarryPotter The Death Eaters, Dumbledore, and the whole Hogwarts staff]]. --> [[{{Hyperion}} The Shrike, Nemes and Colonel Kassad]] --> All the CrazyAwesome {{Badass}}es from the Internet, including Chuck Norris, Mr. T, and even [[BlackComedy Pedobear to rape the child soldiers]]. --> Series/DoctorWho and the Daleks. --> The {{Terminator}} --> [[SuzumiyaHaruhi Nagato, Asakura and Haruhi]] --> The DeathNote and Light. --> The {{Gundam}}s, the [[NeonGenesisEvangelion Evangelions and the Angels]]. --> All the {{Pokemon}}. --> The Autobots, Decepticons and everything in between. --> And, the SCPFoundation and its various Keter-level SCPs, including 682, 173 and 076. ** [[{{Understatement}} They were surprised]]. The LTTE committee was later congratulated in the closing ceremony for creating the most trouble. Unfortunately, we lost because the Crisis Room claimed that the Decepticons allied with Nemes and the villans of Marvel to kill off everybody else. And because Haruhi realized that aliens, timetravellers and ESPers existed, and she got raped by Pedobear. *** I smell foul play on the last part; Haruhi is way too old for Pedobear -- he's ''Pedo''bear, not ''Ephebo''bear. Now, if you had included [[CardCaptorSakura Sakura Kinomoto]], then you would have reasonably had issues with Pedobear on your side. * This Troper has recently started playing Dark Heresy with a coworker and his friends. In our most recent session, we failed to get even halfway through what the GM had planned, because of awesome circumstances. We were making our way through an ancient city built on the wall of a kilometers-deep canyon, with buildings jutting out from the wall and connected by ladders and stairs. We found a slaughtered Tech-Priest team, and their docked shuttle, and went into it to explore. When we went inside, we were ambushed by vicious creatures, some trying to claw through the roof, and more coming down the docking tube towards the rear door. Our psyker waited until they got closer, then used his powers to tear the shuttle doors off, flinging them down the hallway and killing a heap of monsters, but accidentally hitting and rupturing a few large fuel tanks. By this time the beasties were nearly through the roof, and we (correctly) thought that being trapped in a tin can with a bunch of mean, claw-and-spike covered beasties would be bad. The psyker stepped out of the shuttle, and used his powers to tear it free of the docking tube, forgetting that my

Guardsman and our Assassin were still inside. We managed to leap free as the ship went crashing down, obliterating ancient buildings underneath it. Unfortunately, power and fuel cables were connecting it to machinery and the now-leaking promethium tanks, and it began tearing them free. We ended up being caught in a massive landslide of rock, machinery, and highly-flammable fuel, with the psyker levitating on a chunk of stone to escape, my Guardsman rolling remarkably well and keeping his feet, and the Assassin rolling incredibly poorly and getting smashed up by the rocks. We slid down a slope, before reaching the edge and realizing that we were on an outcropping, and were now over a massive drop. The assassin (one-armed after our previous run-in with a Chaos Marine) went flying off the edge, and was only saved by crashing down on top of the shuttle, which was snagged by the trailing cables and dangling. Our session ended with my Guardsman holding onto a rope tossed by the psyker, the psyker hovering around safely, and the assassin beaten and bloodied with 0 wounds remaining. We also destroyed a huge swathe of an ancient city, and possibly destroyed the route to the Mc Guffin. The GM handled it magnificently, making it an awesome experience for us all. ** A recent session involved a run-in with Necrons. For those unfamiliar with Necrons, they're millenia-old omnicidal robots. We came face-to-face with a Necron Lord many many times more powerful than us, and we were obviously supposed to run. Instead, I charged him, in a desperate act of defiance, diverting all the power in my bionically-enhanced body into my power claw to boost it's damage. One critical hit later, I'd (temporarily) killed the Lord. A minor setback, since they reanimate, but still NOT what the GM had planned. * I read the story of Noh from the main page, and decided to do something similar in my own campaign to try and add a bit of a moral choice to my group of Evil/Neutral players. So I added a small spirit girl who came to my party in the dead of night to ask for the return of some magic items they had stolen earlier that day from a sacred temple. I had hoped the cuteness and innocence of a little girl and the suffering that their callous actions would cause might melt their hearts. Boy was I wrong. It went something like this: -->Cute Little Girl: "Please return these or many will suffer." *explains why* -->Party Wizard: "Ummm... no" *To GM* "Is she alone?" -->Unsuspecting, naive GM: "Yes. Why?" -->Wizard: "No witnesses. I cast fireball directly at her face!" *rolls* "Natural 20!" ** ... Not the best way to go about it, especially if they were the type of evil characters that kill people at random. If you wanted to suggest that the evil path might not actually be best course, you need to show them that have evil actions have consequences. Have the suffering they spread come back to bite them somehow, or have the little girl turn into something huge, nasty, and potentially partykilling when they refused. * If Model United Nations counts . . . when it was introduced as a required class activity in my middle school, we got to make up our own fictional nations with their own fictional traits. One kid made a nuclear power with a strong military, then broke off and formed a

"Rebel U.N." and talked a few of his real-life friends into joining him. They strong-armed a high-industry, low-military-power nation into helping them build a device to rapidly melt the polar ice caps, while setting up Dutch-style dikes in their own countries to protect them from the rising sea levels, their goal being to do as much damage to the main U.N. countries as possible. Much fun was had. (We ran out of time to end it properly--according to the final die rolls, their device failed to work, but our nuclear defense system wasn't working either, and they had reason to launch after I attempted to assassinate the one who had the nukes.) * Shortest OffTheRails ever. The players start in a cabin. Players are asked to introduce themselves. "Where am I? Did you kidnap me?" Second player. "Yes. I kidnapped you, and plan to rape you, because I have a fetish for robots." Sixty seconds. * This troper GMed a campaign in which one player took pride in trying to run every scenario he could off the rails. If a problem was intended to be solved peacefully, he would immediately apply violence. If a scenario was planned to end in an epic battle he would insist on negotiation even if the monster was currently beating him to death. In the end he killed the campaign by leaving and convincing the other [=PCs=] to leave during the climactic confrontation with the Big Bad who had been orchestrating the genocide of humanity. * This troper was once part of a campaign where the main villain was hanging around the party, trying to act innocent until he could get his secret weapon ready (unbeknownst to even the OOC players ourselves). Or at least that was the original plan. Instead, he managed to get into an argument with the AxeCrazy party member, which quickly escalated into physical violence with the villain on the receiving end of most of it, and our GameMaster improvised and ran with it due to the RuleOfFunny. HilarityEnsued, and the session basically turned into ''WhoseLineIsItAnyway?'' from there. About an hour later we got back on the rails...sorta. The planned showdown happened, but the villain was already pretty banged up, and so the battle itself lasted about a turn and a half worth of CurbStompBattle. * This troper's recent ''Deathwatch'' game went completely OffTheRails after the party encountered the BigBad, an ultra-Radical exInquisitor, and after listening to his MotiveRant decided that he actually had a pretty good point, and that his seemingly evil methods constituted a textbook case of IDidWhatIHadToDo. Luckily, all this happened at the end of the session, and with a week to re-work things it wasn't too hard to come up with how to handle the party's unexpected FaceHeelTurn. * [[Tropers/{{Zemyla}} I]] was in a campaign run by my father, in Kara-Tur, and we were ambushed by ninja. My father's plan was to have the ninja assault us for a few rounds, then flee, and we would have no evidence but a bunch of dead ninja, which could be people we killed and dressed in ninja outfits. However, my sister used her wand of earth and stone to turn the tide of battle. ** Round 1: Transmute Rock to Mud. Result: a bunch of ninja trapped knee-deep in mud. ** Round 2: Transmute Mud to Rock. Result: a bunch of ninja irrevocably trapped knee-deep in rock.

** A few escaped, but my thri-kreen cleric chased after them, using super-leaping to catch up and psychic powers to subdue them long enough to capture them. My father was not pleased. * This Troper doesn't play tabletop [=RPGs=], instead preferring their forum website text based cousins. During one RP I GM'd based on the manga series {{Bleach}}, one of the Missions had the PC's staking out an area where their enemy was supposed to appear. When they did, the players were supposed to follow them silently, find out what they were doing, then stop them. If they were found en route it would have resulted in the enemy fleeing and Mission Failure, which was set to cause some very bad situations later if they failed to stop the enemy's plan in the area. Two of the three players go along with it and move about stealthily; the third is an idiot and pulls a LeeroyJenkins. Now, if this hadn't been the FIRST ROUND of the Mission, TotalPartyKill would have been eminent. But this Troper prides himself on his fairness as a GM, and so decided to play the Mission out. Part of was adapting the story to substitute the challenge of the espionage with straight up battle difficulty, including the introduction of a Boss NPC specifically engineered to take the party down; they all had spells and spell-based abilities (Kido for those familiar with the series) as their primary offense, so the Boss' main ability was, of course, AntiMagic. However, because I'm not a KillerGameMaster (not all the time anyway), I decided to scrap the plan that needed to be prevented and went somewhere else. The Leeroy Player still got PLENTY of comeuppance though. * This troper started a forum RP that was eerily (and coincidentally) similar to the game {{Prototype}}. The GMPC tried to tell everyone the overarching goal (escape), but hadn't even finished his exposition before the players ran off to pwn some squishy mortals. Then {{It got worse}}. Oh god, so much worse. ** Basically, everyone Mary-Sued their character to try and take control of the plot, ending up with the characters spread across 3 or four different dimensions and two different time periods, each person controlling multiple characters with their own New Powers As The Plot Demands. * Don't know whether this counts, but This troper did Model UN in high school. One of the crises that his council had to deal with was a mutated strain of swine flu, the preceded to infect most of the world's population. The delagation of France put forth a resolution to follow the actions of Will Smith in I Am Legend. ** The next year, the same group of delegates put forth another epic solution. This time, the issue was that Russia and Japan were fighting over a set of islands. With time running short, the idea was made to decide the ownership of the islands by playing rock-paper-scissors. Russia won, then nuked Japan to add insult to injury * This troper did several of these in a DnD campaign, thanks to an accommodating DM. I played an artificer who had formerly supplied specialty weapons to the various feudal lords, before the Regent For Life had sent The Dragon to shut down the operation. Wheezer specialized in making Dust of Sneezing and Choking, which renders anyone who breathes unable to fight for about a minute, and gave the grenades to the throw-anything brawler. After a couple of boss-fights-

that-weren't, all of our villains started using various magics to not breath and or sent constructs after us. Wheezer broke out beam-spam anti-magic wands for everybody. Then we got an assignment to go after a Big Bad who was hiding on another plane. Instead of coming back immediately after killing the Big Bad, the party plane-shifted to another plane, with a faster time rate, and Wheezer built up an army of constructs of his own - which he put to work building magic items for everyone. When we got back to the Material Plane, one day late, the team diplomat (the second son of one of the lords) was able to talk everyone in the world into agreeing to his becoming emperor. Wheezer then started using his magic item business to take over the economy ... And that was the end of the campaign. A lot of fun. * This Troper's players in {{Scion}} recently did a minor version of this. So far they have been on the run from a global purge of all Scions, have had two player deaths and two more of them horribly tortured to the edge of sanity. In the midst of all of this they are picked up by Rasputin and asked to assist in him assassinating an important NPC and hack into important servers to release secret info to the public. This same said NPC used to be an ally of the players before disappearing and then returning to gut one of the [=PCs=] and throw the other one into the game's version of Gitmo. When they showed up at the office building where the NPC was in Vienna they scouted out the location, took everything very carefully, and looked like they were going to go with a more sneaky approach based on their previous experiences of getting nailed whenever they tried a more direct method. Instead they took their feathered serpent (which can fly), flew over the building, jumped off with the Scion of Huitzilopochtli leading the jump. She smashed through the elevator, they dove down the shaft, rapidly killed the Hellhound which this Troper expected to be facing one or two less combat heavy [=PCs=], and proceeded to hack in when the NPC came out of the remaining elevator. They quickly ambushed the NPC who the last time they faced was practically untouchable, killed a powerful combat character, and the Scion of Huitzilopochtli killed him in one shot. All said it was a good session. * This troper just wrapped up her first roleplay (''{{Exalted}}'') in a genuine group ever. It was fun, but our GM was frustrated that we couldn't even ''stay together'', never mind stay on plot. Partially, this had to do with the particular mix of characters - one Siderial who loved to keep secrets from everyone else, so no one trusted him; one Lunar (me) TricksterArchetype character with a SplitPersonality, one of which is such a good liar that she almost always believes her own garbage, and thus has a bad habit of JumpingToDelusions, and two Solars who were for the most part happy if stuff was blowing up. A simple task for my character and one of the Solars to check on a manse turned into my character running off to try to save a random burning village (and then promptly switching personalities so that the character no longer had any idea what she was supposed to be doing), and the other trying to infiltrate a city in the opposite direction in order to see her girlfriend. Manse? What manse? * {{@/Night}}'s Rifts group has progressed to having ''codified methods'' of going OffTheRails. ** "Bedtime Procedure": Knowing there is supernatural baddy in the

room, but the Psi-Hounds can't tell who it is: seal your armor, tell everyone to lay down, and drop a knockout gas grenade to see who doesn't go to sleep. Using CS gas and seeing who doesn't start choking and cursing at you is a subtype referred to as "Harsh Bedtime". ** "I'm A Dog, You Can Trust Me": A Psi-Hound with a very high Mental Affinity can convince nearly anyone of nearly anything, roleplayed well. ** "I'mma Cut You!": If you suspect someone of being a supernatural creature, cutting them with a kitchen knife to see if they bleed is acceptable. ** "The Merry-Go-Round Broke Down": The GM has greatly overestimated their ability to outsmart all seven players. "The Merry-Go-Round Is A Grid Reference" refers to the GM greatly overestimating their ability to match infantry tactics with a group including a pair of Marines. * This troper has decided that from now on his villains will never, ever tell the party that WeCanRuleTogether, because his players have a habit of actually saying yes whenever said lines come up. It probably doesn't help that I generally go for WellIntentionedExtremist villains and/or GreyAndGreyMorality in my campaigns... * This troper recently finished playing in a Nightbane game where the party had to gather materials for a potion to try to prevent a vampire intelligence(the most powerful kind of vampire) from entering the world. The party went to Lillith, a high ranking Nightlord, to get some special Nightland plants from her garden. My character and the resident vampire rightly decide this was a stupid idea and stayed behind. Long story short, the first group split up several more times, got lost, several character died, and finally made it back with a few days to spare. The GM was a remarkably good sport about it, adapting and taking it in stride, even when 4+ weeks of adventures had absolutely no relevance to the plot. On a side note, me and the vampire raided an army depot and stole a Howitzer to use on the ritual site. ---Let's end this week's session here. (I'll have to totally revise my notes to get us back to where we went OffTheRails.) * Hopefully, you'll have something better in store than this crap. ----

OfThePeople * An extension of the trope as it occurs in real life is the "People's " word for the inhabitants of other territories or villages. I'm not well versed as I should be on my Native American history, but I know of at least two NA nations (Mohawk is one) whose commonly accepted name is actually a derogatory term. The name was provided to European explorers by the Native guides they hired. In many cases, even when the term falls short of being outright derogatory, the term is synonymous to "enemy." ** This is true of the Inuit (or Eskimos) and the Dine' (or Navajo). Din means "The People," as well *** This is true of peoples all over the world as mentioned below (the Apache and other groups call themselves ''Din'' as well), however not

all these terms are derogatory or synonymous with "enemy". "Eskimo" probably either means "snowshoe netters" or "people who speak a different language" rather than "eaters of raw meat" as is commonly believed, but a lot of people are convinced the term is innappropriate. This somewhat problematic as "Eskimo" and "Inuit" are not actually synonymous. All Inuit are Eskimo, but not all Eskimo are Inuit. *** FridgeLogic: why would an Eskimo / Inuit take offense to being called an eater of raw meat? They eat a [[ForeignQueasine lot of things]]. * I believe in Japan and China, anyone not native was called a word that is commonly translated as "barbarian". ** Not really. It's translated as ''foreigner''. * China is also called the "Middle Kingdom", meaning it is between the "Upper Kingdom" of heaven and the "Lower Kingdom" of the rest of the world. ** Actually, the shtick of the Chinese was that they in fact ruled over the entire world, it's just that anywhere they didn't know about were a bunch of tax dodgers. the countries around China usually played along. ** It translates better as "Kingdom of the Center", implying that they were at the center of the world, and everything else was peripheries. It was widely held belief in the Imperial China for a long time that the Imperial Palace was the center of the universe. Medieval Christians incidentally held a similar belief about Jerusalem. *** Although, technically, Jerusalem ''is'' more centered on the equator. * Greeks invented the term "barbarian," which means someone who can't speak Greek. ** The term was then made popular by the Romans: "barbarian" means "foreigner" in Latin. ** It's onomatopoetic, by the way. The Greeks thought that all the foreigners sounded like they just kept saying "bar bar bar..."; basically, they called the foreigners "babblers." * I can't think of any groups in real life that follow this trope on the people/not-people duality. For example, the Yoeme call themselves "the people" but they don't have a term that calls outsiders nonpeople. Goyim means "nations" as isn't derogatory in the least, and gaijin and faranji mean foreigner... Anyone? ** Goyim actually is mildly derogatory, technically. in Yiddish, to be a yid is to be a person, to be a goy is to be a non-Jew. It's a slightly more subtle distinction than some of the other examples * The 1930s German anthropologist Hans Nevermann wrote that the Marind-anim of New Guinea "call themselves Anim-ha, the real people. That means that all other people are only of the second rank and, fundamentally, don't even deserve the name people. [Marind-anim] can do with them as they will, because the laws of morality don't apply to them." (Troper's translation) * Europeans meeting other peoples. If you were not a Christian, then you were sub-human. Any atrocity was justified on the basis that they weren't Christian. Of course, should they actually convert to Christianity, they still weren't as good as white people.

* But Europeans don't have the people/non-people terminology built into their languages. Europeans have many strange ways, but that is not one of them. They had to build a system of categorical racism from the ground up. * Most primitive cultures have, or had, names that translate as some variant of 'people'. http://nativehistory.tripod.com/id12.html * The Japanese word "gaijin", literally translated as "foreigner", was (and sometimes still is) used in the same way the word "barbarian" is used. The equivalent term in Chinese meant "foreign devil". ** Chinese word "laowai", the equivalent of Japanese "gaijin", ''does not'' translate as "Foreign devil". It consists of two characters meaning "old" and "foreign" and only acquired UnfortunateImplications quite recently (some old folks still use is as if nothing is amiss). It's still less than complimentary, though. * The "gaijin" example is used in a pastiche of Oriental society in Discworld/InterestingTimes. The word for "foreigner" is the same as the word for "ghost", and one stroke away from the word for "victim". ** Of course, seeing what the medieval Japanese did [[JapaneseChristian to the foreigners]], "victim" might not be too far off. * I don't see how the Japanese word for 'foreigner' being sometimes synonymous with 'barbarian' falls under this trope. In English, people can say something is 'too foreign', implying that foreign is bad and/or inferior. It's the same thing. Also, 'unAmerican' is seemingly, to some Americans, a synonym for 'bad'. Or maybe that just means this trope is more ubiquitous one would think. ** It means it's more ubiquitous than you think. * As a variation of this trope, Slavic peoples referred to themselves as "those who speak" and their neighbours as "those who are mute". The word "Slavic"/"Slavonic" stems from proto-Slavic word for, erm, "word", and even today, the word for Germans in several Slavic languages is very close to the word "mute". ** This etymology is disputed, and it's actually more probable that the "slav" ethnonym ultimately comes from the Proto-Indo-European stem meaning "creek" or "stream". That is, the Slavs are "River People" (which actually makes sense, given that the Slavs ''urheimat'' is the North-Eastern Europe's marshlands and forests, where are ''a lot'' of rivers), not "Talking People". * Linguistically the most common languages in Southern Africa are the Bantu Languages. The word 'Bantu' is derived from 'Abantu', a word that exists in most of these languages (in varying forms) and which quite literally means 'People'. On a related note, another ethnic group in Southern Africa refer to themselves as the 'Khoi-Khoi' (literally 'people of people'). * Former Mexican presidential candidate Andres Manuel Lopez Obrador, being a leftist from Tabasco, has a habit of using the term "del pueblo" in his speeches. In Spanish, "del pueblo" can translate both as "of the village/town" and "belonging to the people". This wasn't bad in and of itself, but his overuse of the term, as well as ignoring the middle and upper classes in favor of the lower classes in his campaign (and subsequent months long quasi-peaceful but disruptive protests after losing), and occasionally referring to groups and

individuals as being "of the people" made at least one mexican more than a little insecure of his intentions. * Chukchi people of the North-Eastern Asia call themselves ''Lu(ghu)oravetlet'' (singular "lu(ghu)oravetlan"), which means "The ''Real'' People", and being {{Proud Warrior Race Guy}}s consider (or at least considered) all their neighbors (except Russians, with whom they fought several wars of indeterminate outcome, their incorporation into the Russian Empire came only later and mostly on economic basis) [[UnfortunateImplications second-class humans at best]], or [[WhatMeasureIsANonHuman not a humans at all at worst]]. The name "Chukchi" means "reach in reindeer" and originally referred only to the tundra-living clans who herd reindeer, in contrast to the coastal clans, who are specialized on fishery and seal-hunting. ---You are [[OfThePeople Of The Troping People]], you may return. ---<<|TroperTales|>>

OhCrap * This happens to me every day. Me: "Oh no, I'm not going to be late to Science, I'm almost there..." Friend: "Oh no, (alias) Haruhi, you must help me with X!" Cue me wondering how I got involved with The Quest To Find The Blue Monkey, or helping (alias) Nagato to get her cookies to Spanish class. I'm cursed! CURSED I TELL YOU!!! (Alias) Kyon does not believe me. * Playing GrandTheftAutoSanAndreas, and trying to beat [[ThatOneLevel N.O.E.]] without any help from Dad. Trying really hard to stay below the radar limit (difficult when the game keeps saying you're above it when you clearly aren't >.>), when this happens: -->'''[[Tropers.ReikoKazama Reiko-chan]]''': I am not above the radar limit. I am ''not'' above the radar limit. I am about to run the [[PrecisionFStrike fuck]] into a bridge! ''(laughing)'' [[OhCrap Ohhh]] '''''[[OhCrap shit!]]''''' * I live in Iowa. Once during a tornado watch, a Storm Chaser on KCCI was reporting. He said something about a funnel cloud dropping down over a house. I glance at the TV, and guess who's house it is. * This troper used to practice kickboxing and got fairly good at it. One day I got picked to spar with one of the instructors, a third degree black belt who spent most of his free time competing in tournaments. The fight progressed in a fairly slow, relaxed manner at first... until I managed to fake the instructor out and land a solid kick directly to the side of his (headgeared) head. For a moment the fight just stopped, and he looked at me in sheer amazement... then got an evil, EVIL grin on his face as he decided he didn't have to hold back anymore. Cue the "Oh Crap" on my part. * Last week, this troper is playing [[FatalFrame Fatal Frame III]] on the chapter where you need Purifying Lights. Then she almost ran out of it so she ran as fast as possible to the room where you usually find them. And when she arrived to that room, it already ran out. [[OhCrap And then Reika appears.]]

* This troper came across pictures of his friend, a bodybuilder, in a major bodybuilding contest. At first this troper thought "Nah, that can't be real, he must've edited those pictures." On closer look, the pics seemed genuine. His reaction? [[TVTropesWillRuinYourLife A link to the Oh Crap page.]] * Playing DevilSurvivor. I'm all happy, because I have a totally overpowered team based on almost every element except Ice. My most badass character was Fire. Then came Belial. Immune to fire and halfdamage from non-Ice. I didn't know this at first. -->'''Me:''' Haha, look, some totally weak boss! Haha, I cracked Agidyne already, dumbass! Prepare to die! -->'''Belial:''' Blocked. -->'''Me:''' Oh, shit. * This troper had her first serious "oh, shit" moment when she flipped her mother's van. Specifically, it was "Oh fuck fuck FUCK, that wasn't the brake! Oh, sweet Jesus, I'm gonna die and Mommy's going to KILL me..." However, nobody was hurt and she's gotten over her phobia of parking spots. * [[MmmKay This Troper]] uses this phrase a little too much after picking the word up from [[HomestarRunner Strong Bad]], and especially likes the variant said by Homestar: -->'''Homestar Runner:''' "Oh, cwaaap." * So there [[{{Comartemis}} I]] am, playing Kingdom Hearts for the first time while my sister watches from the couch, munching on a bowl of popcorn. I've made it all the way to the tail end of the game and I'm going through the bonus fights at the Colosseum. "Hey, try the Platinum Match!" my sister says to me. The pre-fight cinematic begins... the challenger appears... -->'''Me:''' Oh no. -->*''Cue'' One Winged Angel, ''Sephiroth draws Masamune, turns, and strikes a pose''* -->'''Me:''' Oh ''fuck!'' * This troper's [[{{Pokemon}} Luxray]] is extra-crispying its way through the Water gym. Then we meet Barboach, which despite looking like a fish is half Ground...making it immune to electricity. This troper can't recall whether he actually ''said'' "OhCrap" after getting the Luxray pushed to the edge of unconsciousness with a single Mud Slap, but he was certainly removing [[BowelBreakingBricks large rectangular objects from his pants]] afterwards. ** Remember to always bring Grass for backup, then it's the [[QuadDamage Water/Ground types]] that say OhCrap. ** Near-death with a ''single'' Mud-Slap? No, I think that's nobody's fault but your own. * [[{{Ripsaw}} This Troper]] has had a few in WorldOfWarcraft. I play a ranged caster type...few things make me go OhCrap quicker than realizing that I'm tanking the boss due to MeatShield death... ** That ''is'' an OhCrap moment. A raid group is a surprisingly delicate structure. It's held up by how many tanks you have. They're the pillars. These pillars are constantly being repaired by the healing classes (priests, druids, paladins, etc). However, should those pillars happen to crumble...the whole damn building comes crashing down, since nobody else is armored enough to withstand the

damage. * Anyone who has played ''{{Left 4 Dead}}'' will agree when I- DUN DUN DUUNNNNN. DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNNNNNN ** And then you hear crying. * This troper had a particularily epic moment in Halo 3. EssentiallyOnline play. Regular zombies are basically slow moving laser cannons that are almost entirely useless and annoying to play as, while the alpha zombie is a [[PhysicalGod nigh-unstoppable beast of power that can destroy your vehicle and everyone inside it by touching it once and can run about as fast as the fastest vehicle in the game.]] There is nothing funnier than the reaction to a warthog flipping over during a car chase. -->'''Me''': OH SHITFUCK FLIP THE WARTHOG GET IN GET IN GET IIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNN -->'''Friend''': *drives off without me* NO TIME FOR SURVIVORS -->'''Me''': *sees very fast moving glowing thing coming towards me* FUUUUUUUUUU- *killed* * [[{{@/Gancena}} This Troper]], ''right'' before her DethroningMomentOfSuck (more detail on her contributor page). All of the fic copies were hidden or lost somewhere among the student population... and then another student told me that Coach wanted to see me. Of ''course'' OhCrap was my immediate thought. * [[Tropers/{{Dallenson}} Me]] playing the first round of {{Star trek Armada}} II (As the Cardassian's) against My dad (As {{The Federation}}), after building My fleet a bit I noticed His Galaxy and Sovereign class rush charging to My base. --> Me under My breath: "Uh oh" ** Thankfully I had managed to beat Him back with an army of Keldon's ** This reaction Had also occured when attempting to clear a way to an Inf. Dillithium moon to replenish Bio-matter reserves (Playing Specie's 8472 this time) the Dillithhium moon had a HUGE blockade composed of pulse turrets and torpedo turrets that would make a starbase jealous. * [[TheRedRedKroovy This troper]]'s primatology professor, upon realizing that she just showed up half an hour late to her class (it started at 1:15; she, thanks to stress and lack of sleep, thought it started at 2:40, and only came to the room because she needed to grab something), only had two words to say: "Oh. Shit." The few of us that had waited for her (most of the students had walked out before she showed up, thinking that class had been cancelled) jokingly informed her that she now owed us all late passes. * [[{{hrdcrnwo}} This Troper]] got the "Oh Crap" look on his face right at the start of the final boss fight in [[MassEffect Mass Effect 2]] * In a recent session of [[{{Meshakhad}} this troper's]] [=DnD=] game, the party were captured and ended up in a gladiatorial arena. They were set to fight the arena champion, who was by all accounts invincible. However, he also would spare nonevil enemies. When we faced him, the party psion asked him if he wanted to escape. He did. The psion disintegrated the wall of force that separated the arena from the audience. OhCrap for the audience. * I was playing chess with my guy friend Phoenix in the library. He

nabbed my last pawn with his horse, but I noticed I could get said horse with my queen, so I queen'd him mid-gloat. -->'''Phoenix:''' Haha, that was your last pa[[CurseCutShort MOTHERFU]] ** He then proceeded to sink to the floor and curl up in a ball while [[CrowningMomentofFunny I laughed harder than I had in a while.]] * Anybody who has played ShadowOfTheColossus had an OhCrap Moment when they saw the first enemy. The very first enemy, who is [[AttackOfTheFiftyFootWhatever at least a hundred feet tall]]. ** Mileage varies. I had more of an "OH HELL YES!" moment, so to speak. * In an online play of MonsterHunter Tri with a friend, we were running around the flooded forest, chasing a very annoying Royal Ludroth. After the beast ran away from us for the Xth time, we were about to jump in the water and swim after him, but noy before using some healing potions, then I heard a loud "boom", turned the camera around and saw A FRIGGIN HUGE WINGED DRAGON LOOKING AT ME FROM THE OTHER SIDE OF THE AREA (I have no idea which monster it is since I'm new to this series), the rest went like this, through Wiispeak of course: --> Me: WHAT DA HELL IS THAT -->Friend: What? What's happening? -->Me: LOOK TO YOUR RIGHT WHAT IS THAT THING -->Friend: OH SHIT GET OUT OF HERE *dives* -->Me: *while diving* Yeah sure but what is that monster?! -->Friend: *too busy swimming the hell away to answer* ** And after fighting the Ludroth in the next, underwater area, he ran (well, swam) away again... To where we came from. --> Me: *entering the area* Oh no, it's still there D: * [[{{Latia}} This troper]] got a big one while watching AngelsAndDemons: -->" Let's see, four elements, four Preferiti. First element, earth, [[spoiler: Preferiti killed via being choked with dirt]]. Second element, air, [[spoiler: Preferiti killed via punctured lungs.]] Third element, fire...[[{{HighOctaneNightmareFuel}} uh-oh.]]" * After watching [[Series/DoctorWho Doctor Who's]] "Flesh and Stone" (the one with the Weeping Angels, who probably make up the majority Doctor Who's [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel/DoctorWho High Octane Nightmare Fuel]] page), at around 2 in the Morning, the lights are perfectly on. I am home alone, and nowhere near the light switch. The light goes off... Seeing how the Angels seem to enjoy killing the light sources before attacking, I to simply put it: shit it. ** Now I am extremely [[ParanoiaFuel paranoid]] whenever I face away from a door, thankfully, I haven't seen any statues that resemble Angels recently. * Me and my sister had a dance recital recently, and she was in two types of dance while I was in one. This wouldn't have been much of a problem if the costumes didn't have two different types of tights and just a different outfit (For the record, each dance had to wear two pairs of tights with each costume). Now, the big problem comes when she has a ballet number two songs before our pom number. This may not seem like a short amount of time, but you try taking off one costume,

and putting on another really complicated one, within that time limit. It did have actual use of this phrase: -->Sam: (As sister and another one doing ballet and pom pass us) You have two songs to get changed. -->Sister: (Not slowing down) Crap. ** I swear, [[AllMenArePerverts I]] had to read that three times before I properly parsed that word as having only three letters. * [[{{Tropers/KingSonnDeeDoo}} This Troper]] had one whilst playing ''[[HalfLife Half Life 2]]'', shortly after meeting '[[FanNickname Manhack]]' Matt in "Route Kanal". She'd gone down a dark corridor, and saw the red glow of a [[GoddamnedBats Manhack]], only for it suddenly mysteriously explode, and a fire to start. The fire spread as she batted a couple of Manhacks away with the crowbar, and then switched on the flashlight just in time to see that the fire is actually a pair of lit [[ExplodingBarrels Explosive Barrels]]''''' right next to her''''', causing this to happen... -->'''Me:''' *''Turns to run''* [[CurseCutShort Oh cr]]*'''''BOOOOM!'''''* * Nothing makes you feel "Oh Crap" like getting called to the office at school. * I was playing pokemon and battling a pokemon with a high hp when mine had low speed. I used double edge (hurts user) knowing my steelix's abilty protect it, my oppenent's move? Gastro Acid, Cue Oh Shit! from me. OHKO for both of us. * My mother had just sworn off men after a bad breakup. A couple weeks later she looks up and [[LoveAtFirstSight sees my dad standing in the doorway]]. Her first thought? "Oh, ''shit''." * [[{{ICantThinkOfAWittyName}} This troper]] once caused this moment. She was pissed at one of her friends and was walking toward him with a quite creepy KubrickStare. Let's just say he got the OhCrap face badly and ran. For his ''life.'' ** She (same troper still) also gets this when people come toward her crying. The most recent example: -->'''Friend:''' ''*crying her head off, complete with pathetic snivelling, sniffling and snot*'' -->'''Me:''' OhCrap. RUN LIKE THE WIIIIIIND BATMAN. * [[@/{{Psyga315}} This troper]] and some friends were watching RememberMe, a 2010 movie starring Robert Pattison (aka Edward Cullen). Anywho, near the end, Robert finds himself waiting in his father's offices. One of my friends said to cue an airplane. [[spoiler: Soon after he said that, the scene shifts to a classroom in which the teacher had the date underlined on the chalkboard: [[IKnewIt September 11, 2001.]] [[MassOhCrap All of us went Oh Crap.]]]] * This troper was playing Eversion (the level where you're chased by the wall of blood) when all of a sudden the power goes out. Of course, it shocked me into dying in the game, and then.... I SEE YOU * Jumping to a friend's Facebook profile only to notice that the "Add as Friend" button is once again there[[hottip:*:in other words, they've deleted you]]. This troper's internal reaction can range anywhere from "meh, I never cared about this person" to this trope. * Fairly minor, but this troper had this when he realised that he had no idea whether he had passed his stop on the bus due to being

ingrossed in a game of sodoku on his new mobile. The panic ended when we turned into the town I had to get off...and I then got off at the wrong end of town, bringing it back for a second or so. Luckily, it wasn't a long walk to where I was staying that night (with my aunt), but it was dark when I got off the bus, which played merry havoc on my fear of the dark. * This was [[Tropers/{{Fyrewyre}} me]] when I was playing Pokemon Soulsilver and thinking ahead to save it after I finished at the center. Cue OhCrap when my brain decides that Nurse Joy telling me that my pokemon are healed is it finishing saving and flipping the on/off switch before I can react. And I had just gotten my Weedle to level up, too... * Once, I was playing Fallout 3. I realized I was taking damage. I turnned around, and stared directly into the face of a GiantEnemyCrab. I jumped three feet in the air and squealed like a little girl. * Me and my friends used to make fun of this one guy behind his back, nothing too serious, just a fun way to pass the time at school. So, in our first semester at high school, one of my friends gets himself a girlfriend out of nowhere, and out of habit, we asked her where she lived so we could drop her off after school. You cannot imagine the look of utter shock my friend had when it turned out it was the same place where the guy we made fun of lived. I personally laughed my ass off right there, my day complete. * [[Tropers/{{SMDeathwind}} This troper]] had a fun little moment playing [[{{Pokemon Black and White}} Pokemon Black]], involving [[spoiler: [[{{Pokemon Diamond and Pearl}} Sinnoh Region Champion]] and new {{Bonus Boss}} Cynthia]]. He casually enters each house in a new city, seeing if there's anything of interest after [[spoiler:a few postgame routes of being ridiculously outleveled by everyone]], and as he enters one in particular, [[spoiler:the town's music stops and is replaced by [[{{Leitmotif}} Cynthia's piano BGM]]. Cue terror as he realises just how screwed his team of six level 50-52 Pokemon is.]] * Though [[@/RedWren this troper's]] character was too busy fighting to really take it all in, she cannot see the rapist slavedrivers reacting any other way when their would-be victim {{exalted}}. * Any and every time I see a dragon in ''[=~Demon's Souls~=]'' gets this reaction from [[@/WillyFourEyes me]]. * Hands up: How many of you have lied about doing your homework, only to have this reaction when the teacher asks to see it? * After reading the original [[BenDrowned haunted Majora's Mask cartridge]] {{creepypasta}} (i.e., pre-ARG), this troper created a second file in her game labeled "BEN" as a joke. [[ForegoneConclusion So of course]], after having been away from the Wii for a few weeks, she loaded the game and practically jumped out of her skin before remembering what she'd done. * [[Tropers/DaPatman This troper]] is involved in a superheroes game using a semi-homebrew system in which you don't fight individual villains/mooks/whatever. Instead, you fight threats, where a threat could be a bunch of mooks, a single EliteMook, a tank, the BigBad, a fire, or pretty much anything else the GM comes up with, and it's possible for the players to create new threats on bad rolls. Anyway, in one of the sessions, in which we had to infiltrate the clockwork

palace of the Clockwork King of Switzerland, the party had two OhCrap moments. First OhCrap moment: The Clockwork King is a BigBad who has the ability to spy on any location using any clockwork objects in the location... such as the walls of his palace. Second OhCrap moment: When we eventually got into a fight in the palace, one of the threats was "He Watches". Eventually, we defeated the threat, and decided that this meant that we had managed to escape his sight. Until someone almost immediately created another threat, that is: -->'''New threat''': You haven't. * This troper's example takes a bit to build up, so bare with me. The setting is history class. We are studying the beginning of the 1900s just after the industrial revolution when the MoralGuardians were realizing the bad parts to large factories, child labor and no health inspection protocol. The focus of our studies the three presidents involved with the progressive movement, meaning they worked to fix the CrapSack nature of business trusts and industry; Teddy Roosevelt, William Howard Taft and Woodrow Wilson. My teacher decided that for a test he would have us debate on which president was the most progressive by dividing up the class into three groups and choosing a few representatives. I got put in group Taft,the fuddy duddy on of three. Fine. This is a debate. If I am chosen as the group's rep, I can probably pull some obscure facts out of my ass and use my mask of competence and agression to win. I am made for debating. I have a big voice when I want to, an argumentive nature and a talent for pollishing shit via window cleaner from my ass. But then another person volunteers. She really wants to do it, she says she has it all organized and really really wants to be our rep. This is a rather prickly person whom I just got on halfway decent terms with, so if she thinks she can make Taft look progressive, I'll let her. Debate day comes. She is prepared. She has note cards. She blows off my pep talk and goes to the front of the class with the Wilson and Roosevelt debaters. In the peanut gallery, verbal dakka is pumped in all directions in particular between me and a Wilson kid. It's the usual "Fatso's goin ''down'' "Oh, I don't think so WW1, we are gonna pawn your ass from here to Jupiter!" I cannot wait to wipe the smile off his face. It's a matter of pride and me being right about the pawnage. So my rep goes first and does her bit. It's nice and neat, not over acted and hits the few key points available for Taft. Next is Roosevelt, a girl who tries to be more exuberant, but clearly knows little about what she's talking about. Easy pickins. Then the Wilson guy stands up. He speaks loudly. He makes grand gestures. He hams and haws on a progressive sandwich of Woodrow Wilson's majesty and has the class clapping for him at the end of it. Did I mention we are being judged by our fellow classmates? And the losing team gets a maximum of a 4.5 grade for their efforts, the winners 6.0? ''Shiiiit''. I see that kid laughing his but off in the row next to me. Our reps come back to our groups for a pep talk and more info before the last round when they will be actually arguing with each other. Hoping I can salvage the contest, I tell our rep to "Do what the Wilson guy's doing and then

sqaure that by a thousand Steven Colberts." They go back up and she just sits there, not interrupting while Wilson and Roosevelt engage in Ham to Ham combat, my forehead hitting the desk once more. After the slow torture of being roasted over in the peanut gallery as my peers deem Wilsom to be the most progressive, I asked her how she could commit such treason. Her answer "I had nothing more to say." FacePalm. Anyway, I have told you this rather mundane little story so you could understand the layers of illuminative OhCrap in that History lesson. I never truly understood the meaning of "Oh Crap" until that first moment. When Woodrow Wilson's hammiest fan open his mouth and said "Now we ''all'' KNOW why Woodrow Wilson is the MOST progressive president of ALL TIME" and this equisitely horrible shiver went through me. A feeling reminicient of Achiles before the arrow struck, of Goliath staring at the stone spinning towards him. When you take your finger of the chesspiece and see your opponent smile, realizing exactly how far you have to fall and how little you can do about it. oh. ''CRAAP'' * I'm from Maine. What weather do you usually think of when you think Maine? Tornadoes? Yeah, not so much. August of 2009, we had one come within ten miles of my mother's house; we didn't know the exact path at the time, though, only that we were in the middle of the warning area. That was OHCRAP Part One. Cue next June. Mom and I are on our way to the next town to get a pizza, and as we leave the house we hear thunder. One rumble doesn't have time to end before the next beginsjust like last August's storm. We look at each other and think, "This is MAINE." We convince ourselves that it's just a bad storm and head out. Then we see the sky to the southwest. Matters do not improve. We get to the pizza place, get our food, head out the door, look toward home- and decide that RIGHT NOW is a good time to go get those groceries we forgot a couple more towns in another direction. Our route takes us up and over a large hill with an amazing view, so naturally I look. "Mom, that's a wall clou- OH FUCK THAT'S A FUNNEL!!! WE DIDN'T BRING THE PUPPIES!!!" That one came within five miles of the house, and the path would have taken it within a mile if it hadn't dissipated. OHCRAP Part Two. (And yes, I do feel guilty about not bringing the pups with us, but they were fine. In fact, they were asleep when we got home.) Now we hit July. I'm in Portland, in my brother's top-floor apartment with the lovely view to the north and west. I've been gaming, I hear thunder, notice that the light is getting wierd, look out the window- and jump online to get the latest forecast while saving and shutting everything else down. Swearing may have occurred. I got confirmation of ANOTHER tornado warning, grabbed my laptop, and booked it up to Maine Medical Center to ask if I could cower in their lobby until it passed. (Did I mention I have a phobia about storms and have had all my life?) And as I'm sitting there, the woman behind the desk tells another who is getting ready to leave that there has been a tornado spotted in Gorham and the path was taking it toward... you know where this is going, don't you? Luckily for us, it

dissipated one town over. Still, OHCRAP Part Three. That's three definite tornadoes in the space of one year, plus two other possible tornadic storms while on my geology class road trip. People have threatened to start calling me Dorothy. ** Me to. I lived in Florida, now live in [[SpongeBob NAME AND ADRESS WITHHELD]] so we never had that many in the sunshine state. Cue Chirstmas day, playing my new Wario game... Sister comes in. Turns off game, says there's a tornado coming. She'd tried the trick on me before, so I didn't believe her. Cue me walking to the living room, seeing my town (Howie-in-the-Hills, don't ask me) in tornado warning area. Cue OhCrap moment from me, breaking into shock remembering my [[NightmareFuel paraplegic grandfather]] is out getting eggs. Cue CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming when he comes back OK. * In every game of MagicTheGathering @/{{Icarael}}'s played, his reaction to someone summoning/hard-casting [[http://www.magiccards.info/query?q=Emrakul%2C+the+Aeons+Torn&v=card& s=cname Emrakul]] first is this. Of course, when he summons Emrakul first, this trope applies to them. Most of the time. -->'''Opponent:''' Float 15, Emrakul. -->'''Icarael:''' *stares* *scoops up cards* That's it. Good game. ** This troper has a similar outlook on Progenitus ("Protection from Everything"). A friend has a deck that summonins it via Dramatic Entrance (so it costs 3 of anything and 2 green, rather than 2 of each color) and can do so on turn four. * Said out loud in my Spanish class "un pinche pendejo" ([[spoiler:"fucking asshole"]]) to my Spanish teacher for telling me to speed up the rolls of my 'r's. Cue {{Oh Crap}} by me and a {{Death Glare}} from the teacher. * [[JusticeReaper I]] had just such a moment today, while browsing this site during a really slow work-day. I had a flash of memory recall, that I had dreamed that my supervisor came up on me unexpectedly and scolded me for not working. [[spoiler:Averted.]] ** Happened again today, albeit with no scolding from any supervisor involved. [[spoiler:Played straight this time.]] * Happened to this troper when he was playing [[WarForCybertron]]. Final part of the Autobot campaign, nothing fancy I thought, just three Autobots, walking around, minding our own buisness. My thought process was as follows: --> '''Me:''' Meh. Some last level this turned out to be. [[TemptingFate I mean, nothing's gonna jump out at us or anything]]. I mean, [[WhatCouldPossiblyGoWrong what sort of random event could possibly happen here?]] -->[[spoiler: [[PrecisionFStrike HOLY DEEP FRIED FUCK ON A STICK]], [[HumongousMecha TRYPTICON]]]]. --> '''Me:''' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck '''OH SWEET GOD.''']] * Having played the first Golden Sun games, [[MrGibberingGenius I]] made it to Crossbone Isle in Dark Dawn. I made it to the lowest level and got [[spoiler: Charon]] and was heading to the other summon tablet when suddenly[[spoiler: Dullahan]]! ** Same game, Ancient Devil, [[spoiler: "Matthew (my highest level character) has changed sides!"]] [[PrecisionFStrike Oh fuck. OH FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!]]

* A few seconds into Christchurch's 6.3 earthquake, I had a distinct feeling of OhCrap upon the realization that this one was going to be somewhat larger than the usual 5.0/5.1 annoyances. * I DM a game of [[DungeonsAndDragons D&D 3.5e]] and tonight, [[GeniusDitz one of]] [[CloudCuckooLander my players]] (a Factotum) was blind and at the top of a [[ItMakesSenseInContext one way fast transit tube]], and a mystery fruit falls from the ceiling. He eats it, and is now unconscious. You know what the dwarf does? He goes up '''on his goddamn horse''' to check on him, not knowing that it was one way. He managed to reverse it, and ''throws'' the factotum down. Then he shoves his horse down, so he can follow. The factotum's player goes OhCrap, then starts rerolling. A ton of horse is fairly lethal, it turns out. * During my first run through Pokemon: Platinum Version (which also happened to be my first DS game; long story, but know that I had a DS Phat), the Elite Four was giving me a lot of trouble, due to my lack of level grinding. One, while at a Wal-Mart, I was idly working on beating Flint whenever my group needed to stop for something (I was minding the shopping cart). Towards the end of one aisle, I finally beat him, and pushed through the dialogue before walking toward behind him to face the next door and save, as was my habit. At the time, though, I needed to get going again, so I used my right hand to push the (now heavy) cart forward, while my left hand squeezed Up on the dpad - [[OhCrap and rolled right onto the power button]]. * ''Scarface: The World Is Yours''. When the chainsaw bastards pull me out of the car and I have to run frantically down the alley way in order to to simply escape dying, much less fighting back. That is, if I survive being pulled out of the car... * My first time playing GodofWar 2 was like this. I saw Kratos being shrunk the normal size while the Collosus of Rhoads came at me. Regardless, I knew it wasn't gonna turn out good. * I had one of these moments only a week ago when my mother walked into my room, [[DrivenToSuicide having swallowed all 50+ of her perscription medication.]] This lead to two more reactions on my part: [[FreakOut frantically grabbing the pill bottle]] [[NotSoStoic out of her hands]], followed by [[FearLeadsToAnger screaming and cursing at her until the ambulence arrived.]] * When [[@/{{Tadaru}} T.T.]] was at SakuraCon 2006 (an anime convention), he and his friends went to the retro gaming room and saw they had [[PanelDePon Tetris Attack]] there. This troper was [[{{Understatement}} somewhat better]] than the others. It was so popular that they organized a makeshift tournament on the last day of the con. Him and a friend were just playing for fun right before it started. The first match was him versus said friend. Upon finding that out, their facial expression and following {{Angrish}} were ''priceless''. * A guy I knew in highschool went to school to take an AP[[hottip:*:Advanced placement. Think honors courses in high school at a college level.]] test. Turns out it wasn't the day for his AP test, it was the day for his IB[[hottip:*:This is what kids take to get a PhD in two years]] test. Which he had 4 minutes to get to. ''In a completely different school.'' And you only get one IB test in your

entire life. * Actually ''caused'' ''two'' of these in a game of {{Halo}} (3 to be exact.) Team Slayer, forget the level, two guys were charging this troper in a Warthog, and he was packing a [[{{BFG}} Rocket Launcher.]] This troper somehow managed to miss both shots (which was his own OhCrap moment.) As the Warthog stops quickly (there was a cliff nearby), he suddenly remembers... "I have a frag grenade left!" And chucks it just as the 'Hog turns toward this troper. The frag ends up right under the 'Hog's undercarriage. At that moment, this troper hear through his headset: "Dude - NADE! WATCH IT!" And then the driver, who has already driven over it, yells: [[AtomicFBomb "HOLY FU-"]]. Hilariously enough, this troper and his roommates never heard the rest of the word because the grenade exploded under his side of the vehicle at that moment, [[KilledMidSentence killing him.]][[hottip:*:at which point their microphones stop picking them up until they respawn.]] Meanwhile, the Warthog itself was blown backward and hit [[MadeOfExplodium a fusion coil]], resulting in the vehicle rocketing up into the air and doing no less than ten very fast barrel rolls as it floated over the cliff. Cue an [[OhCrap "OH SHIT!"]] from the guy that was in the passenger seat, as he [[CrowningMomentOfFunny tries to bail out of the Warthog...only to find that there is no longer any ground under him.]] * My friend once tried to scar me by linking me to porn. None of it really drew any reaction out of me, so then this happened. --->'''Friend''': I CAN'T SCAR YOU --->'''Me''': I WIN --->'''Friend''': I HAVE TO BRING OUT THE STUFF THAT GROSSES ME OUT --->'''Me''': OH SHIT * This troper remembers a rather funny one from his senior year in college. He and his roommate - [[TheBigGuy a rather large fellow]] were leaving the dorm along with a couple of other guys. A couple of other guys happened to be standing in the hallway. This troper's roommate - all in good fun, of course - told the guys to move. The first one did. The second one - a [[HairOfGold blond-haired]], blueeyed freshman goof that was in the Air Force ROTC - stood his ground, put on a grin, and said, "I'm not moving." So this troper's roommate decided just to [[FoeTossingCharge walk through him.]] The change in the kid's facial expression (right before he went [[CrowningMomentOfFunny airborne]]) could have been the main page's trope image. * This troper recently wrote his landlord a cheque for about 2000 for the rent, and was extra-careful to keep just over two grand in his bank account. Checked the balance a few days later, it was 100 short. I forget my exact words, but they were not at all polite. It turns out that the cheque had cleared already and I'd underestimated the balance in my account, but by the time I figured this out I was already on a plane to Canada. * ''EtrianOdyssey''. Three letters: [[BeefGate F.O.E.]] I've had the misfortune of running into two of them, once because [[http://raydere.tumblr.com/post/7216876594/ I miscalculated the patrol route of an orange one and found myself stuck between one and a mud square]], and once because I stepped into a red one by accident--

the latter was even [[NightmareFuel WORSE]] because I didn't anticipate it. Thankfully I was able to run away in both instances. ---[[OhCrap Click here]] to... Holy crap! ----

OhCrapThereAreFanficsOfUs * While not fanfics per se, my friend has been having a series of dreams in which all of our friends have illicit sexual encounters with each other. They're all of the CrackPairing variety. I informed him that his dreams were pretty much our equivalent of Fanfiction.net. ** Another not-strictly-fanfics, but: This troper. One of his friends. Potentially a [[{{Minecraft}} Creeper]]. That is all. * Once [[Tropers/StongRadd this Troper]] makes his webcomic and there's enough fangirls to write fanfics, the main characters will play this trope. * I'm not sure if this counts, but when your on a site, and act as the 'official' character... Um, yeah. I was [[TalesofSymphonia Mithos]] at this site... and my best friend [[TalesofSymphonia was Genis.]] I can never look at Mithos/Genis the same way ever again. * A ShipperOnDeck friend of this troper recently implied that she had or would be writing fic of said troper and her girlfriend. * Not of ''me'', but when this troper first got into fandom--some of which included RPF--she found out that a person she knew peripherally in school had some fans on the internet. Very strange experience. * [[Tropers/AdelePotter This Tropette]] and her friend are writing a novel together. When there are fanfics, we have decided not to fight it, but embrace it. Seriously, it's a compliment if people write a fanfic of your work. ---Go back to-- [[OhCrapThereAreFanficsOfUs Wait, there are fanfics of us?!]] ----

OhMyGods * This troper is fond of "Oh dear lords", and or "by the pancake", depending on how silly she's feeling at the time. * Thanks to [[HellfireCommentaries NTom64]], [[Tropers.ReikoKazama this troper]] has become fond of saying - just 'cuz she can - "Christ on a bike", "Christ on the proverbial bike" and "Jesus tap-dancing H. Christ on a unicycle". (Yes, Tom actually says that last one. It's during the first Sonic 06 playthrough.) * TruthInTelevision, this editor knows many pagans who use this expression, and it is the title of a pagan webcomic [[http://ohmygods.co.uk Oh My Gods!]] ** [[MrDeath This editor]] uses "Oh gods," on occasion, but mainly picked it up from reading the above mentioned {{Discworld}} books. ** [[{{Robbychu}} This troper]] has always found that saying "Zombie Raptor Jesus onna Pogo Stick!" gets her point across rather well... *** Wow. That is awesome...

** This troper comes from a very Christian background and, in order to upset no one, both he and one of his friends say will restrain themselves to swearing by gods, as opposed to the one true God. Its a release when you've learned to censor "crap" and "screw" out of your dictionary. ** This troper has no idea where she picked up "Oh gods," but it was probably from Dragonlance, Order of the Stick, and Discworld. ** This troper picked it up from roleplaying too much - I also have a tendency to use variations on it involving my roleplay character's gods, many of whom I myself made up. D: ** This troper has said "Oh ''Gods,''" "Oh, dear Gods," "by the Gods" and "I knew <blank>, but . . . gods, <blank>." He has no idea where he got it. ** This troper is a polytheist (don't call me a pagan [[BerserkButton if you value your life]]) and has the reflex so well trained into himself that he yells out "oh gods!" during sex. This tends to surprise the women the first time they hear it. *** Polyamorist as well as polytheist, are we? ** This troper is, likewise, a polytheist, but continues to use the Christian cosmology for the purposes of swearing, as their deities are the ones he's least afraid of upsetting...and you just can't beat 'by Lucifer's beard!'. *** Lucifer's beard? Huh. I always pictuared him as clean-shaven... **** Doesn't he have a [[BeardOfEvil goatee]]? ** This troper has a tendency to moan "By all the ''gods''" at the slightest provocation. Granted, she also uses "Jesus, Mary, Joseph, and every in-law from Nazareth to Bethlehem!" on a semi-regular basis. ** [[ManCalledTrue This editor]] started using "Oh, gods" around the same time he took up atheism. It hasn't stopped him from the occasional ''[[GratuitousSpanish "Madre de Dios"]]'', though. ** Likewise on the atheism. A sideorder of "For the love of the gods, what in all the hells are you doing now?" creeps in every so often as well. ** This troper is Wiccan and uses "Oh dear Gods" and "For the love of the good Goddess" frequently. She's also quite fond of "For the love of all things unholy" to get a few weird looks. ** {{celticfang}} is also Wiccan and uses "Oh my Gods" or a variation thereof, or "Goddess above" (again, variations of). It's when he drops a {[Precision F-Strike}} that you'd best run. ** This troper, being a massive D&D nerd, regularly uses "What in the Nine Hells?!" ** [[LadyShadowflame This troper]] also regularly uses "oh gods", along with plenty of other variations. ** This troper, though he's the antithesis of a believer in anything, picked up the habit of saying "oh gods" (and on occasion, "Oh, goddess") and so-on from his pagan ex-boyfriend. He hasn't been able to break the habit since. ** This one says "Hell's bells!" when he's not saying "By the gods!" ** "Oh, [[TheLegendOfZelda Goddesses!]]" ** This Troper kinda likes the {{Discworld}} atheist's way of swearing: 'Oh, random-fluctuations-in-the-space-time-continuum!' Or: 'Aaargh, primitive-and-outmoded-concept on a crutch!'

** [[{{Dor}} This Troper]] does this, despite self-identifying as agnostic rather than pagan these days. ** This troper is a pagan, says "Oh my gods"... and her favorite random swear, "Holy zombie-humpin' Jeebus (or Buddha) on a pogo stick!". Monkeys also feature in her profanity. ** This troper tends to swear by particular attributes of the Norse Gods, usually Odin. For more vulgarity "Freyja's Tits!" is always a fun one. ** This troper occasionally uses "Of for the love of Cthulhu" And "For Sheogorath's sake!", along with "Oh my various gods" and "God fucking Dammit". Incidentally, this troper is an Atheist, and actually worships coca-cola. ** This troper has used "ftaghn" as a substitute for [[that other word PrecisionFStrike]]. Also, asdfjkl (or just asdf). ** This troper is also Atheist (but doesn't worship Coca-Cola) and tends to say "Gods!" or "Oh my Gods!" Or even, "Mighty Dagda!" Of course, the standards like "crap", "shit", and "fuck" are also uttered. ** This troper, yet another atheist (High fives all around! :P ) uses "Gods be damned." But he has no idea when or why he started using this. It will probably be a common phrase in his writing, though. * This troper loves this. "What in the fgsfds?" "What in the seven shades of hell!?" "Oh, for the love of Animus!" and her personal favorite, "Ra Almighty!" * [[{{Cameoflage}} This troper]] has a friend who does this ''all the time''. And every last one of his RP characters do, too, regardless of whether it makes any sense for them to either be polytheists or do it as a fan thing/to be different/for laughs. * [[{{Cassy}} This troper]] had a friend in Latin and Greek class who actually trained himself to exclaim "By Zeus!" among other things. He would even occasionally say "Ne ton Dia!" (the Greek expression --if my memories of Greek are correct), which makes a bigger geek than most of us. ** It's actually "Ma ton Dia". Just saying. ** As for me, I'm a non-Christian Francophone and I use profanities in English when I'm ''really'' pissed. When I say ''"Holy mother of Jesus!,"'' it means I'm either very upset or being very ironical. * In this troper's case, replace "God" with "truth". * [[LullTheConqueror This troper]] does this all the time, and sometimes (particularly when it'll get a rise out of someone) does it gratuitously. "[[TheSimpsons Oh my various gods]]!" "[[NeverwinterNights2 By every god and his mother...]]" He's also fond of substituting 'Eris' for 'Jesus' and "Bob" for 'God'. "Sweet Eris!" "What in "Bob"'s name?" ** This troper does the same with 'Grog', as in "Grog knows!" and "grogdamn annoying!". If this isn't enough for the reader to doubt his sanity, the original Grog in question was a caveman in some guy's avatar on a computer game forum. * This troper has taken up exclaiming, "Ye GODS!" He's not really sure when it started. ** Are you a fan of Tuesday Morning Quarterback on ESPN? ** This troper used to do that, and he got it from the webcomic ''User

Friendly''. Does that help? *** Never read it. ** This troper does it too but she thinks she got it from Terry Pratchett. Perhaps you got it from there too? ** This Troper uses "Ye Gods and little fishes!"- no clue where I got it. Also "Good Lord 'n butter!"- but I think that was BloomCounty ** This troper has used "Ye Gods" as long as i can remember, having learned it off my mum. ** [[MasterTMO I]] have been known to occasionally say "Ye flippin' gods...". Pretty sure it came from somewhere, but I don't know where. It's not meant as a loud exclamation, but rather a quiet statement of disbelief and/or resignation. ** I'm pretty sure that's where I picked it up: "Ye Hairy Gods!" or some variation. * Nowhere near as awesome as the others, but I have been known to use 'by the countless evil gods of poorly-written pulp fantasy!' ** Egads I need a shorter exclamation. *** Trope almighty? By the [[MarySue Sue]]? ** Oh yeah, and "Hugo ''freaking'' WEAVING" and occasionally (mentally due to self-censor) "Vincent fucking Price." * [[{{Nomic}}This troper]] often uses "in the name of the Legion"/"in Legion's name" or "By the Legion", as in "What in the Legion's name?". The Legion refers to the Burning Legion from Warcraft games. He also often uses the phrace "in the name of all things unholy". He also sometimes uses "Great Gods of Chaos!" instead of "Oh my God!" * [[{{Scrounge}} This troper]] occasionally uses "Oh, for the love of all that's good and holy and a couple things that aren't!" * This troper uses the exclamation "For Frank's sake!". If asked about this, he explains that it refers to "Frank Lowell, who lives in Detroit; I don't know this for a fact, but I figure there's got to be at least one Frank Lowell in Detroit". * This troper, for some reason, cultivated "gods above!" for a while when younger; now all her swearing comes from Discworld. "Buggrit, millenium hand and shrimp" gets some pretty odd looks when muttered furtively under the breath, but the winner is definetly "offspring of a dog of the female persuasion!" (Jingo). * This troper uses "Gods" quite a bit...by the gods, gods above, etc. He's also fond of using Crom (Conan, anyone?), though thats a conscious decision, usually for some over the top, hammed up exclamation. "May Crom and all of the thousand hells decend upon you if you do not give me the last slice of pie" is a good example. * This troper, being an atheist, switched god in "Oh my god!" with... that other guy. Which doesn't really make much sense, either. ** This troper used to say "Dear sweet non-existent lord." Now her general exclamation is [[NinjaPirateZombieRobot "SWEET ROBOT JESUS!"]] * This troper, being a [=SubGenius=], often uses "Dear 'Bob'!" A forum he used to frequent had an atheist C++ coder as a regular; said coder often used, "Dear [=SRand()=]!" And then, of course, there was a job he had which had a work study program with the local Baptist college, whose students often used "Oh my word!", as they were very serious about the whole "not taking God's name in vain" thing. * This troper posted this in a forum a few weeks ago: "That depends

entirely on what is handy at the moment. If I have to gag him with a bunch of Fettuccini Alfredo, then by the gods, I will." * This troper is very fond of "Dear sweet Cthulhu!" Because [[TVTropesWillRuinYourLife TV Tropes has ruined her life]], she has also been known to say "For the love of MikeNelsonDestroyerOfWorlds ..." ** Add to that ''Oh, for Cthulhu's sake!'' and ''Por el amor de Cthulhu'', for greater lulz. *** ... "For the love of Cthulhu?" O.o ** This troper is fond of "Son of a Shoggoth!" and "By Cthulhu's tentacles!" She has also exclaimed and knows several others who like to exclaim "Oh Mylanta!" * This troper has used, at various points, [[HarryPotter "Oh sweet Merlin!", "Merlin's beard!"]] [[{{Belgariad}} "Belar, Chaldan, and Mara!"]] and [[TamoraPierce "Mithros, Mynoss, and Shakith!"]] ** You forgot the best one, "Merlin's knickers!" * This troper finds himself using [[{{Zelda}} "Goddesses"]], [[{{Warhammer40000}} "Emperor,"]] and "Chaos" (probably from chaos ''theory'' rather than a fictional reference) as substitutes for "God." ** This troper tends to swear by the emperor, along with shouting "by the black gods of the immaterium!" * This troper has used, depending on which has been more recently read, "Ye gods", "Emperor", [[{{Battletech}} "Kerensky"]], "Blake", and [[{{HonorHarrington}} "Tester"]]. * This (non-religious) Troper finds 'oh my gods' to be ''really irritating'' and isn't quite sure why. ** This (religious) Troper does too, but generally hates anyone trying to be a unique snowflake anyway. * This (non-religious) Troper uses 'Holy space!' 'By space!' instead. ** This Troper likes "By the stars!" seeing as how stars do most of the work of creation and all. * * thumbs her nose tauntingly at the above troper* This troper often says something along the lines of "Sweet Guardian" or "Good Guardian", even "Guardian bless!", as per her homebrewed not-exactly-serious religion. When she wants a little more punch, then she goes for gods. * [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Griff This troper]] is an atheist, yet uses phrases like "oh my god" and "what the hell" frequently. When called out on it, I point out that blasphemy is next to heresy, so I'm still pissing off [[AcceptableReligiousTargets all the right people]]. ** [[PokeThePoodle Not all churches consider those phrases blasphemy.]] There's plenty of religious people who go day in and day out using those phrases. On the other hand, your doing it [[DeadBabyComedy in hopes of]] ''[[DeadBabyComedy upsetting]]'' [[DeadBabyComedy religious people]] just because ''you're'' an atheist is ''definitely'' a DudeNotFunny. *** [[YourMileageMayVary Speak for yourself.]] * [[{{Loki Lie-Smith}} This troper]] uses "ye gods", "Hecate preserve us", "for Goddess' sake", "Eris Discordia", and "Gods of Paradox" (specifically invented just to swear by). * [[{{gadeel}} This troper]] deliberately drilled himself to exclaim

"[[{{Warhammer 40000}} By the Emperor]]!", [[UnusualEuphemism as well as]] "[[MetalGear BEES!]]" so as not to risk insulting the priests of his school. ** This (hmph, maybe moderately religious) troper will make 'Bees!' her new catchphrase. It's been used on and off for some time now (usually followed up by me doing a doubletake and proclaiming 'beauty is in the eye of the BEE-HOLDER!') but it's now thoroughly endorsed. * Not sure if it qualifies, but [[QuantumToast this troper]] has been using the phrase "what in the French hell?" ever since mishearing a line in ''AmericanDad'' as that. * This editor is a Communist. Replace God, Jesus, etc with Marx, Lenin, etc. Warhammer 40k has also become a subject of interest, so it's not uncommon to hear exclamations of "Sweet God-Emperor!" followed by "Marx's mustache wax!" ** That...is beautiful. Thank you. * This Troper avoids using the word "God" in almost any language so he has a whole stock of phrases for almost any language he knows, he is rather fond of using ''Dioses!'' in Spanish ''Goddess!'' in English, ''Teos Vitae'' in Latin and is currently learning how to say Gods in French. ** As a semi-unrepentant Latin geek, I feel it necessary to point out a couple things. First, as Romans used oaths of that sort mainly to appeal to the gods themselves, it would be better to go ahead with "o Dei," "Oh Gods," in the nominative, rather than 'the life's gods', which honestly makes no sense. Touching upon the last part of the preceding statement, the grammar seems to come from a small rock nestled amidst the rings of Saturn, as you put Gods as the indirect object, and, of course as is the case with 'ae' in the second declension, one must guess for life/lives. Thirdly, It is 'Deus' not 'Teus'. Next, in Latin, only names are capitalized, and even 'Dei' is stretching it. If you were to invoke the power of a specific god or goddess, for example 'o Iuno!' then that is an entirely separate matter. I believe I shall cut my rant short, as I have realized that my rant was entirely longer than the original post to which it replied. * This troper's Wiccan girlfriend uses "Oh my gods!". However, I (a atheist) tend to use funner expressions, like "Sweet Zombie Jesus!", "Sweet raptor Jesus!" and "Sweet Chocolate Jesus with a delicious cream center!" ** This troper theorizes that practically any two syllable noun can be used in ''sweet _____ Jesus'' and it'll still sound great. Zombie, baby, monkey, raptor, werewolf, &c. Verbs in the present continuous tense are more welcome in ''Jesus _____ Christ'', e.g.: "Jesus tapdancing Christ!" ** "Jesus H. Christ on a Ritz cracker!" is a favorite of this Troper, as is "Christ on a bike!" ** This troper, in a moment of great stress, came out with "Sweet lolloping Christ!" The only rationalisation she can think of is that it might have something to do with the Easter Bunny. ** This troper's favourite is currently "Sweet Raptor Jesus with a cherry on top!" ** Oh come on! Jesus IS a zombie. Back from the dead, doncha know?

* [[{{Melesmelda}} This troper's]] swear of choice: "Oh, [[WatershipDown Frith!]]" * After watching ''IClaudius'', this troper went through a phase of using the term, "Great merciful BLOODSTAINED GODS!", in his best BRIAN BLESSED voice. * [[ROBRAM89 I]] [[{{TroperTales/GoshdarnItToHeck}} refer you to my previous statement]]. JABBA FUCKING HUTT! * This troper both exclaims with "gods", but more often putting "dear ''Satan''", "for the love of God, Satan, Buddha, and creamed squash" and "DEEP-FRIED JESUS ON A UNICYCLE!". * This troper has, at one point, equated Fred Morrison (a musician he quite likes) to god. To shove the point in, for a while, he used "Oh my Fred!" instead of "Oh my god!". * MoralGuardians like to point out the commandment about not taking the name of God in vain, saying that it's disrespectful. So I take the names of {{Satan}} in vain, with exclamations like "Dark Lord of Hell!" when I'm really annoyed or frustrated. * [[{{Sikon}} I]] just go with the Russian equivalent of "Oh, Lord" in Russian speech, despite being an atheist. In English speech, I use things like "bloody gosh", "for crying out loud", and "for sanity's sake". My ''Main/WorldOfWarcraft'' character goes with the plain old "By the Light". * This troper started using "Oh your god!" in response to the common exclamation, as well as "[[AzumangaDaioh OH MY GAHH]]". * [[ShayCaron This troper]]'s mother regularly uses the phrase "Lord love a duck", and he is determined to eventually integrate it into his own vocabulary. * [[TroperOnAStick This Troper]] is fond of invoking [[{{Pokemon}} Arceus]]. * FurikoMaru has a habit of saying, "Oh, sweet [[RevolutionaryGirlUtena Anthy]], no/yes (as the situation warrants)!" * [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Horton_Conway John H. Conway]], people, just pick something you think is awesome but not blasphemous and run with it! * When this troper was writing a drama for church, a pirate swore in surprise with 'by the power of greyskull!'. Intended as a direct HotFuzz rip off. * This Troper tries to be creative as well. I prefer to say, "Unholy Crap!" when things get bad, since it sounds more logical. * This troper, being a huge music nerd, has worked "Sweet child o' mine," "Jesus Christ deny your maker," and of course "Holy diver" into his speech patterns. * For this troper, it's usually [[TheHitchHikersGuideToTheGalaxy "Oh, Zarquon!"]] * [[{{Chadius}} Holy Crepe!]] Also, [[{{Freakazoid}} Aw, nutbunnies.]] * This Troper has gone though quite a few of these over the years. Examples include "Oh lord and lady", "For cruk's sake" and "oh, for the love of anime". I'm currently toying with the idea of substituting "christ" with "[[SoulEater Kid]]". * This Troper frequently invokes the name of Ceiling Cat. * This troper is fond of several, particularly "Jesus Christ in an Easter Parade!", "Holy Maple Syrup!", "Holy Apple Cider!" and "Jesus

Crap!" (the latter being a misspeech from trying to say 'jesus christ' and 'holy crap' at the same time). * This troper has been known to invoke the [[BattlestarGalactica Lords of Kobol]] on occasion. This troper is a devout Catholic. * [[TheWeirdo This Troper]] has several habits. "Goddess" (Not common in Portuguese), "(By) [[ForgottenRealms Tymora]]", "Nimb" (God of luck in a Brazilian setting), "By all the gods", "Gods", etc. He never got laid. * A (nonreligious) friend of this troper has taken to using "By the unyielding gaze of SCIENCE!" as her primary exclamation. Her other choice phrase is "ByThePowerOfGreyskull!" * This troper frequently employs "CHRIST ON A BIKE!", and sometimes "By Jove". * This troper has an occasional habit of saying "Wrath. Of. Ye. Gods!", thanks to having read CollegeRoomiesFromHell. * Sweet merciful [[{{Superman}} Rao]] this page has gotten long. * This troper tends to use "Oh my Shiva", "Oh my [[NightsIntoDreams Wizeman]]", or "...oh gods." * This troper sometimes says "oh gods" or "oh [[{{Transformers}} Primus]]". * Oh, by the powers of darkness, not this trope... * This troper finds "Ye Gods" to be a wonderful phrase to mutter when someone does something particularly stupid. However, for top of you lungs swearing, you can't beat "BLOODY VERMILLION HELLS!". This irreversible scarring most likely came from reading The Wheel of Time and the Dune prequels in close succession. * This troper, when she doesn't say "oh, gods", she'll use various names of fictional deities... such as, "oh my [[DeathNote Kira]]" or, "oh my [[{{Bleach}} Aizen]]." ** I can't quite decide if that's clever, funny or slightly scary. * {{Magnezone}} sez.......... "Ohhhhhhhhhhdeararceus." Or, occasionally for moments of surprise, "ASDFGHJKL." (It's pronounced 'add-jis-fickle' said very, very fast.) When I really feel like saying a long private joke where nobody will understand, I go for, "Holy Shiny Robot Atomic-Bomb Wielding Arceus Piloted by an Ex-WorldExploding Insane Man With BLUE HAIR!!!!" No, seriously. I've done it. * [[{{Lycoris}} This Troper]] has developed a habit of replacing 'Jesus' with [[TengenToppaGurrenLagann 'Kamina']], ex. "Dear sweet Kamina", "Kamina H. Christ on a pogo stick", and the especially rare substitution of 'Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!' into "Simon, Nia, and Kamina!" Yes, this agnostic troper has many, many issues. * This troper is quite fond of exclaiming " By the Nine Divines!" * Being a fan of Battlestar Galactica and a participant in various BSG forums, this troper has both used and seen being used the phrases "oh my Gods" or "godsdamnit" even outside direct discussions about the show. When a thread was made to discuss the usage of "gods", some posters admitted that these phrases had made their way into their daily vocabularly outside the internet despite not being pagans. ** This troper watched four seasons of Battlestar Galactica in a month in order to watch the 5th season while it aired. She has been unable to shake "Gods" and "frak" from her vocabulary. That much exposure in such a short time apparently renders such vocabulary permanent.

* This troper generally uses fictional dieties, such as "Emporer damn you!" * EddieVanHelsing tends to swear by Shabranigdo's balls or Lilith's heart-shaped ass when not in polite company. When ''in'' polite company, he swears by chaos. * [[ActionZero This troper]] entirely blames this site for his use of "Sweet CrystalDragonJesus!" and other similar exclamations. * [[KillerClowns This troper]] is, despite his best efforts, stuck with "Oh my Goddess," in reference to his days as a Discordian. It is not that he worships Eris anymore, per se. It is simply that, regardless of to whom he prays, [[CosmicPlaything his prayers always seem to be answered by her]], [[HilarityEnsues in the way she'd prefer to answer them]]. (Oh, by the way, contrary to what TheIlluminatusTrilogy and Principa Discordia would have you believe, she's ChaoticNeutral. And quite thoroughly {{Yandere}}.) * This troper's found herself blurting out "[[WildArms4 Saint Calucion's]] ''tits!''" when mildly angry, lately... it seems to be a milder form of her truly incensed cry of "SEKHMET'S BLOOD-SPATTERED TITS!" (usually followed by "WHAT THE HELL IS ''WRONG'' WITH YOU PEOPLE (or THE UNIVERSE or THE WORLD or SOCIETY or MY FAMILY)?!"). She's also in the past asked "What in seventy different hells...?" and wished "the wrath of twenty-three gods from seventeen pantheons" on people who pissed her off. * [[InsanityInside This troper]] sometimes says "For somebody's sake!" * This troper has begun invoking the names of various CLAMP characters. She once said, quite loudly, "MOKONA DAMN IT!" ** Similarly to the above, this troper occasionally shouts "CLOW DAMNIT". [[spoiler:Everything else is his fault anyway.]] * This Troper, because of an inside joke among him and a friend, uses "Oh Good [[InvaderZim GIR]]" and at one point has used "CrystalDragonJesus!" * This troper once heard someone in a particularly nerdy setting swear "by the Electric Throne of Doctor Hawking!" * This troper uses "A'isha" (that's eye-ee-sha) rather exclusively, though she only noticed she was doing it recently when a friend asked about it; the friend assumed it was a Jewish thing (this troper being the only Jewish teen in a very baptist town) when, in actuality, it was picked up from an episode of Scrubs. The most commonly used variations are 'I swear to a'isha' and 'for the love of a'isha'. ** Jewish, my flaming fingertips. A'isha is a ''Muslim'' name. *** And it's [[ItIsPronouncedTropay not really pronounced that way either]], but let's not get into that. * No love for Raymond Feist? "By all the Gods of Midkemia!" Well, whenever I remember, anyways. I usually swear obscene rather than profane oaths, anyhow, or in GratuitousJapanese. Or Chinese, which I am, so I've got an excuse. * This troper is prone to swearing by gods, and was oddly proud when his little brother started too. * [[{{Winter}} This troper]] falls somewhere near the atheist end of the spectrum but habitually says 'Gods below' (A {{Dune}} thing, he thinks) and phrases like 'God's teeth' and 'Mother of God,' usually in the context of 'O sweet Mother of God, why does this exist?'

* This troper uses variations on "powers of dusk" and "dark gods!" * Reading through this page, this troper has decided to start using "By the great [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Nilson Ninni]]", and "(By) [[RevolutionaryGirlUtena Anthy]], [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Nilson Ninni]] and [[RobinHobb The White Prophet]]!", and variations thereof. Much more fun than "Oh, [my] god!" and various {{Satan}}-related curses, which are standard for my native Swedish. * This troper has a character he plays in a Marvel Comics setting. As the character is mystical based, his favorite exclamation is 'What in the various hells?!'. He also plays in an oWorld of Darkness room. His Garou usually exclaim 'Oh for the love Gaia!. His Changelings usually exclaim 'What in the name of the Dreaming?!' * This (Christian) troper's got a Discordian friend (as in, one of those who view it as a religion disguised as an elaborate joke rather than the other way around) who typically swears on Eris' name when he's not saying some form of "Gods." * [[NeoSilverThorn This troper]] uses some form of "Gods", but has taken to using a line from a Miles Vorkosigan story: "What in God's Nine Green Hells <is going on/happened>?" * This (French) Troper has picked up "Par tous les dieux et leurs putains!" from a (French) fantasy series. It translates as "By all the gods and their bitches!". In English, he is fond of stuff like "Holy shit!" and "Jesus Christ!". * Every time this troper says "Oh my god!" and a certain friend of his is around, said friend will reply: "mine too!". It is really getting on my nerves. * When I was a kid, I'd sometimes go with "Oh my gods!" or "By the left testicle of Choronzon!" More recently, I've adopted "For [[HaruhiSuzumiya Haruhi's]] sake!" and "What in the name of the Flying Spaghetti Monster?!" For extra fun, try "Vittu merdique na dhabhail!", which means "TheDevil's shitty cunt!" in Finnish, French, and Irish. * Sometimes if This Troper (Ilite) wants to exlaim something, she might make up anything after 'Holy...' Especially if she sees something in History class that stuns her, so she'll be muttering something like 'holy goats' or 'holy flippers' 'holy kitbags' or whatever comes to mind. Sometimes it might even be just a nonsense word with random phonetic sounds like 'jesoflub!'. Swearing in Simlish is just as fun too...that's what happens when you play The Sims 2 too much! * This troper substitutes "Bod" for god: "for Bod's sake, oh my Bod, etc." a recent variant is "For bod's sake, mankind", a sort of Nebulous/hitchikers mix, as in "for Bod's sake, mankind, you call it a healthfood shop and yet you have no elderflower cordial * grumbles* ". Also used are "Ye gods" (see above) and "by Complexity" (this troper is Atheist/Buddhist), for when I'm actually serious about something. I also sometimes call on the names of certain islands of [[Earthsea]], including Roke, Esmer, Paln, and Osskil, sometimes in conjunction ("Roke and Esmer, what have you trodden in this time?") * This (Taoist) troper prefers cursing in Cantonese (otherwise known as 'speaking Cantonese in a normal tone of voice') but finds "in the Name of the Nameless/that which Has No Name...", the first few lines

of LXVII ("The whole world calls my Way vast..."), and "BUTTERFLY!" to be useful in some circumstances. * Recently, [[AXavierB this troper]] has been replacing any instance of "God" with "[[HaruhiSuzumiya Haruhi]]". "Praise Haruhi!" or "Blessed be Haruhi's name!" ** Wait... [[Tropers/OMalley I]] say this ALL THE TIME. -brofist* [[{{QueenOfSwords}} This troper]] tends to use "Oh, Goddess" or "By the gods" as expressions. * This (Irish Catholic) troper tends to say "For Dagda's/Eiru's sake" every now and again. * This Myst fan troper has been known to exclaim "Oh my Yahvo" and "Yahvo have mercy". * Kinell, started as an abreviation ('kin 'ell), over use turned it into a standard if meaningless word. When something stronger is needed typically it comes out as a somewhat warped InTheNameOfTheMoon speach. * [[SlatzGrobnik This Troper]], out of a general aversion to taking the Lord's name in vain, uses "Dog," because at one point it was the first thing to come to mind. * LEXicon712: For the love of [[DeathNote Kira]], all of you should praise [[{{SuzumiyaHaruhi}} Haruhi]], [[{{Pokemon}} Arceus]], and [[{{GurrenLagann}} Kamina]] ** OMK! (for Kamina or Kira) ** OMH! ** OMA! * Good fun can be had in mass if you're not Christian (but still forced to go) and have a plethora of anime characters at your disposal. Especially during the Lord's Prayer. Not quite swearing, still quite entertaining. * I, a Muslim, have been known to use "Christ" (generally in a ridiculous fake-Irish accent, in imitation of a friend's fake-Irish accent), and "Oh, for Pete's sake." * This troper tends to use Gods or Goddess, but he also says the normal array. And 'Light', which is a habit he's trying to break, given that he hasn't touched a WheelOfTime book in ''years''. He has been known to mutter [[TheDresdenFiles Empty Night or Stars and Stones]] while on an archive binge though. * This troper started with "Flaming Ammet!" and went through "Zarquon!" and "zarking fardwarks!" before fetching up at "Christ in a funnel!" After a brief stint in the land of "Jesus Allah Buddha Snack Fairy!" she now bounces around everything from "Jesu Christe!" (the influence of college choir, natch) to "Lordy Lou!" to "Oh mon Dieu." Weirdly enough, her expletives have gotten more Christian as she's gotten less so. (Meanwhile, her father has been known to say things like "doo-dah Dumbledore!", "cat piss and porcupines!" and "pig misery!") * This troper uses more syllables with increasing levels of anger - so "God" and "Christ" are minor, but Zoroaster help you if I ever swear use Huitzilopochtli... * [[WallofIllusion This troper]] has recently considered invoking the [[TheQueensThief Eddisian gods]] when upset. She already chants the invocation of the Great Goddess to calm herself, so perhaps it's not a great stretch.

* This Troper has been known to use "Oh my CrystalDragonJesus!" * This Troper occasionally uses "oh ye gods" but depending on the situation may spout "By the seal of [[{{Gnosticism}} Abraxas]]!" or "[[{{Warhammer4000}} Sweet ever-changing coil of Tzeentch]]!" She just now thought of another expression to use: [[{{Takarazuka}} By the hotness of Wao Youka]]!" * [[JET73L This troper]] (who is a somewhat-confusing-to-others type of all-polytheist with a somewhat more hypothetical hint of pantheism) tends to use "good ''gods''" for the general "grant me freedom from this frustration" phrase, "[[{{Discworld}} Oh God]]" for headaches and nausea, "''gods''" for "alright, ''who'' or ''what'' is responsible for this!? I am ''so'' annoyed by it!" He also uses various weirder phrases for showing mild (and especially somewhat amused) exasperation, both in his head and out loud (such as "By [[FullmetalAlchemist Hohenheim]]'s beard!" [which has a bit of FridgeBrilliance to it], and "o, [[DidYouJustIndexCthulhu improperly capitalized unprintable grumble that sounds sort of like]] [[TheUnpronounceable c'lhu-l* plhegm* ]]" [which is [[NoPronunciationGuide easiest to say properly as a mostly-guttural grumble]]], and a silent, wordless ShoutOut to whatever [[TricksterArchetype Trickster]] first comes to mind when a humorously prankish ContrivedCoincidence happens). * This Troper has a little brother who frequently replaces "God" with the goddesses from [[TheLegendOfZelda Zelda]]. "Great Din" and "for the love of Farore" are two of his favorites. * This troper once saw a friend post "OME" on some website or other. When I expressed my confusion, she elaborated, "It stands for 'Oh My [[Literature/{{Twilight}} Edward]]'". I was reduced to [[{{Angrish}} incoherent sputtering]] for a good five minutes. And, if you want to know, my preferred oath is "sweet [verb]ing [noun]!" - a favourite is "sweet jumping bananas!" * This troper is rather fond of "Oh, for the love of peace!" * This troper has gone through a number of variants of this and currently uses "Sweet fucking Godkings!" * The wonderful troper that is I is rather prone to saying "frick-aloo!" It came from the French dub in an episode of [[{{Scrubs}} Scrubs]]. ** This other troper does this too! I thought I was alone. But, no. With the power of the frickaloo, no one is alone! * This troper has recently taken to saying, "Almighty [[TeamFortress2 Saxton Hale]]." * [[AnthonyMercer This troper]] likes to say "[[HomestarRunner What the pfargtl?]]". * [[{{Arcadiarika}} This troper]], because she flat-out refuses to say "God" for religious reasons (she's Catholic, and she can't use His name in vain) and tries not to offend everyone else, uses such quotes as "Hikaria/Arceus help me," "Dear Hikaria and Arceus," and so on. {{Magnezone}}, you're not the only one who uses Arceus. (Hikaria is a fictional character--a deity--of her own series. No, I am not going to make it like Sciento--I mean, Happyology. Again, Catholic.) * This troper's Latin teacher in high school just yelled "Jupiter!" when upset. She seemed to be Christian, though.

* This troper uses Naga or The Three Nagas. Mock religions are fun to make. :D * [[{{Renagade}} This troper]] has, at one point, exclaimed "SWEET JESUS IN A CORNDOG!!" and "HOLY BUTTER BISCUITS!!" Oddly enough, I'm not especially fond of either food items. * This atheist troper will frequently utter "Oh My God!" or "Jesus Christ!" in moments of shock, but when using it on a message board will typically replace God with either "InvisiblePinkUnicorn" or "FlyingSpaghettiMonster" * "What in the name of Dagon's decomposing ballsack is going on!?!?!" and "(by) Nurgle's Rot!" for this troper. * [[TerLoki This agnostic troper who has yet to make a contributor page]] has taken to inserting characters, gods, and famous people in place of God as well as using "Oh my possible God" and "Oh your God". Some of the more common variants of the former include "[[YuGiOhTheAbridgedSeries For Ra's sake]]" and "[[MorganFreeman For the love]] [[HalfLife of Freeman]]". Allah has been popping up quite a bit recently, especially whenever I feel the need to play Islam's advocate (I apologize to any Muslim tropers offended by this). * This troper has a Hindu friend who is prone to saying "Oh my gods." Logical. She has a (lapsed) Catholic friend who is prone to saying "By the middle taint of Thor!" Slightly less logical. * This troper uses "Oh, gods," "For the love of Nyx," and substitutes Arceus into the pledge of allegience. And has recently added "Sweet merciful [[HigurashiNoNakuKoroNi Hanyuu!]]" * [[ShinyBulbasaur This Troper]], like the above Troper, uses Arceus. I also say, with great amusement, "What in the name of Raikou, Suicune and Entei is going on here?" and "For the love of Snorlax!" Both my sister and I use 'for the love of the gods' and 'I swear to the gods' despite not being of any particular faith. * [[ParadoxicalFrog I've]] been known to come up with some rather creative oaths -- [[SuzumiyaHaruhi "Merciless Haruhi!"]] and others involving [[TouhouProject Yukari]] and [[HigurashiNoNakuKoroNi Oyashiro-sama]] spring to mind, but I've also used the names of various deities from my own writings. * This troper is polytheistic, preferring " By all gods" or " Oh my gods"...if things go really downhill, he tends to run with " Morrigan's Blood!" or, as a phrase that would not go unstuck from the first time playing Baldur's Gate, " Blood and Ashes!" * Due to six months of writing a Pokemon Let's Play, this atheist Troper has gotten in the habit of swearing to legendaries. In real life, I'm often prone to saying "Sweet zombie Batman." * Due to this Troper being a pagan with a born-again Christian for a mother, phrases like "Oh my God" and "dear god", have been replaced with "Oh my gods" and "dear goddess", so as not to offend. However, when feeling especially aggravated around my children , I do tend to drop in an occasional "O Dios mio", the Spanish version of "oh my God" picked up from my mother-in-law. For some reason its actually more satisfying than swearing in English, although very Caucasian Amazon swearing in Spanish does get funny looks. ** Mon dieu! * Once, this Troper, when startled, exclaimed "Jubjub Birds and

Jabberwockies!" * This Troper is Jewish, and went to a mostly Christian high school. When one of her Christian friends said "Oh my God", she got in the habit of saying "Yours and mine" (and when her Hindu friend was around, "Yours, mine, and all of his!") ** [[FridgeLogic But they're the same god.]] * [[Tropers.DescendantOfShinobi This Troper]] is a VG geek and uses the names of various Final Fantasy summons instead of 'God'. Kinda fitting when you think about it, as most of the ones she swears by are Gods in their own right. 'Sweet Shiva' and 'Odindamnit' are her favorites. * After watching AVeryPotterMusical, this troper and his friends have begun exclaiming "Oh my Wizard God!" * In a sort of inversion, this Hindu troper uses typical christian curses, mostly regional British and Irish ones E.G. "Jesus, Mary, n' Joseph!" or "bloody hell!" which doesn't even make sense considering this troper lives on the other side of ThePond. Slightly explicable in that I'm half-Irish and obviously am more hesitant to take my own gods in vain. * This (atheist) Troper occasionally says "oh my gods" or "oh my everbeloved deities" when in more polite company. I also occasionally curse in German or Finnish. And despite not having seen Battlestar Galactica (yet!) I use Frack a lot. * This Troper frequently uses [[{{Firefly}} Mandarin]] curses; since she introduced her family to the joys of the 'Verse, they increasingly know what she's saying. She has never been prouder than when she exclaimed, "Go se!" and her mother told her to watch her language. ** This Troper kindly reminds you that he seriously doubts you are pronouncing them correctly, [[AcceptableBreaksFromReality since nobody in {{Firefly}} does either.]] * After spending some time in the ''{{Homestuck}}'' fandom, this troper has grown fond of "Gog!" and "Jegus!", which, in {{Fanon}}, are main figures of the Troll religion. * This Christian Troper simply says "Fuck." * This user tends to say [[ReBoot By the user]] What in the name of unholy algorithm, and, May the Hexs have mercy on your soul... * This troper has a habit of asking people what in the nine eternally damned circles of [[GoshDarnItToHeck Heck]] they're talking about. * This Troper, a Christian who likes to invoke the Greek Pantheon (EG "Hercules, Zeus, and Hera!" or "Hades on a bike!"), thinks it's very interesting that the majority of the people on this page who ''don't'' invoke The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are ''not'' Christians. Not because of any religious reasons, I really couldn't care less what everyone else says, but it's statistically interesting. The people who really don't care what the Ten Commandments say are the ones ''complying'' with one. It makes sense, yes, but it still seems generally inconsistent. Oh, and I also like to throw in a "[[LoisAndClark Great Shades Of Elvis!]]" once in a while. * This troper uses "Oh my SCIENCE!" when trying to be sarcastic. When truly angered, he slips into Angrish and rather disturbing cussphrases, like "Bloody fuck!" * This troper invokes WillWright, SidMeier, TetsuyaNomura and/or

ShigeruMiyamoto. * This Buddhist (and NERD) troper uses "oh for the love of [[DeathNote Kira]]," for [[ElderScrolls Sheogorath's]] sake, by Cthulhu, "Sweet [[FinalFantasyVII Sephiroth]]," "ye gods," or simply "[[BattleStarGalactica Frak]]." * This semi-Christian troper says "Oh Cripes", and even "Oh Goss". The latter mainly because it sounds like Gordon Ramsey. * [[{{Unhari}} This Troper]] Uses the plural form of any expression (Oh my gods, Oh for god's sakes). He's an athiest, and therefore doesn't want to pick sides. * I use this statement "Oh My Gods" as a replacement for "Oh My God" mainly because he despises monotheism. Why one God when there's the possibility of ''all Gods''? ** Hinduism can be interpreted as monotheistic ''and'' polytheistic simultaneously: that all the Hindu gods are, in fact, a manifestation of one god, aka Brahman. There, you happy now? * This Troper, [[StrawAtheist who is an atheist]], finds phrases like "oh my gods" profoundly annoying and uses the cursing he grew up with. It's not like using an expression makes you a monotheist. * This troper tends to invoke Phrike (her -ahem- patron goddess, for lack of a better term, seeing as she doesn't actually worship Phrike [rather, she worships Yahweh, and retains a belief in just about everything else. They just aren't to be worshipped. Feared, maybe.]). ... And MapQuest. * This tropette is trying to get into the habit of saying [[DiscWorld --ing]], [[TheDresdenFiles Empty Night]] and [[CthulhuMythos What the Ri'leyh]] * Ever since a near disastrous incident involving seventh graders and open flame fiery problems have always gotten This Troper responding with "Holy Mary, tap-dancing mother of Christ!!" * This troper's friend is a shintoist and frequently says, "Dear gods." * This troper is partial to "Dear sweet Cthulu!," "In the name of David Bowie's sainted package," and her personal favorite, "In the name of [[TheSlenderManMythos Slender Man]]'s wanking arm!" * This atheistic troper says: ** Oh my Haruhi! ** Oh my Kira! ** Oh my Cthulu! ** Oh their/your god(s)! * This troper has once seen a ''{{Touhou}}'' fancomic where Reimu yelled an epic "SHIKIEKI DAMNIT!" [[hottip:*:For those who do not know, Shikieki is the judge of the dead of Gensokyo.]] ** This troper has seen one where Alice Margatroid uses [[PhysicalGod Shinki]] in an expletive. [[hottip:* :Shinki being the creator of Makai, where Alice may or may not be from.]] * This troper likes to use "Sweet Zombie Darkrai" for ''{{Pokemon}}'' fic, and read one fic where characters got into an argument over which Legendary Pokmon they chose to swear by. * As a kind-sorta Hindu (minus the caste system) I always preferred Ganesha. Hence, "oh for the love of Ganesha!" More often though, I just throw words together. "For the love of bloody bollocks!" which

sounds ''incredibly'' painful, come to think of it... ** Also, "[[FinalFantasyVIII Hynedamnit]]!" * This troper, being both a Catholic and a huge nerd, loves to use the phrase "Madre de Ciencia!" or "Madre de Diodes!" (the latter coming from the awesome webcomic GirlGenius . Poor Professor Diaz...) "Sweet Mother of Pain!" is also a nice one, though I'm not sure where that one comes from, other than it sounds neat. * This troper's mother, a Catholic, will often exclaim "Jesus, Mary and Joseph!". This troper's pagan friend exclaims, without exception, "By the gods and goddesses!". This troper (a pagan) uses "Oh my gods" (often around those who don't know she's a pagan) as well as "My Goddess!" but 16 years of Catholicism keep the basic "Oh my God" in the mix as well. * From a TabletopGame: -->'''[[Tropers/{{Michael}} This Troper]]:'''Tell me what you know or by Anything and Everything I'll throw you back in there! * This she-Troper is fond of saying "Maiden, Mother and Crone!" or "Goddess and Consort!" but her favorites are "Sweet Tendrils!" and "Oh, Murphy!" * "[[SlenderManMythos For Slenderman's sake!]]" * Thanks to ASongOfIceAndFire, this troper has been saying "seven hells" consistently for a few years now. During my Oblivion days, "by the Nine!" showed up a lot. And, now that all of my friends play DragonAge together, "Maker's breath, you're beautiful" shows up a lot too. * This troper is part of the {{Pokemon}} fandom. He throws around "Mother of Arceus" sometimes. * This troper is a loyal, though not strict, Roman Catholic but I enjoy mixing up my exclamations I say "Oh my God!" normal but I'll also say "Oh Gods!" "Jesus Motherfucking Christ!" "By the Allfather!" "Ollathair Almighty!" "Holy Hell!" "In the name of Pants!" "Fucking Sky Gods!"(when it's raining) so on and so forth. * Due to having spent too much time hanging around Spacebattles.com, this troper has taken to using 'ROB' as a subsitute for 'god', although only in writing and even then only on sites where the other posters will get the reference. * @/{{Night}} regrets to inform you he just now swore by the [[LyricalNanoha Sankt Kaiser]] while trying to write. He blames his characters doing so. * This troper uses 'omg' a lot. Being a devout Catholic, and having a lot of friends with very strict rules about language, it's always short for one of three things: 'gosh', 'gods' or [[LordOfTheRings 'Gandalf']]. Depends on what I've been reading lately... * This Troper ends up using "Christ on a cracker" randomly, though I'm trying to break that habbit. I also picked up "sweet googly moogly" and"sweet caramelized [[FinalFantasyVII Sephiroth]] on a stick!" from a friend, "for the love of all that's holy", and variations on "what in the nine hells?". And then there're the two rather... ''imaginative'' classics: "Fucking royal shit!" and "Fucking buggersticks!" * [[{{Tropers/Enzeru}} Yours truly]] says "[[SonicAdventure Oh my Chaos!]]" and "[[SonicUnleashed Oh my Light Gaia!]]" with the

occasional use of [[TheLegendOfZelda those three or four goddesses]]. * [[Tropers/{{Bronzethumb}} This Troper]] used to be fond of replacing "God" with "[[WatershipDown Frith]]" in his expressions (e.g. "Oh my Frith, what's with all these rabbits?"). These days, it's more like "[[{{Supernatural}} Oh my Castiel]]". And if he's ''really'' upset, he'll bust out "Christ on a crapstick!" ---Great Joss! Go back to Main/OhMyGods now! ----)

OlderIsBetter * [[Tropers/BlueByrd This Troper]]'s grandmother got married soon after the end of WW2, when everything was in short supply. The new furniture she bought had been made from wood that had not had the time to age properly, and started to fall apart after a few months. 65 years on, she's still using the pre-war "old junk" she then picked up from an auction as an emergency measure. * This Troper once had the privilege of sampling a glass of 32-year old scotch that sold at about $8,000 per bottle. It was like drinking nectar of the gods.

OlderThanTheyLook * This troper is 19 now. She will look 16 the rest of her life and look like a high school student. Some teenagers don't even know she's older and guess her age to be younger. Her boyfriend still looks like he's in high school as well. ** She is happy that this age thing makes bus fare cheaper. ** Her current boyfriend's family is also very young looking like her own family. *** The troper's mom looks in her 30's, when she is in her 40's. * This troper is almost 25 and still gets mistaken for 19 or 20. My mom was starting to look 62, but since she got her hair done she could pass for 50. Subverted with my dad. He's 62 also, looks his age, but hasn't aged a day in 13 years. * This troper is frequently mistaken for being 14-15 and is actually 18; could be genetics, my mother is in her late forties and looks late thirties, early forties and my dad is in his mid forties and looks like he's still in his thirties. She's also got a friend who is older than she is (turning 19 in July) and is constantly mistaken for being 8 or 9 she's even been mistaken as my younger sister! * This troper is routinely mistaken for a 13-16 year old, and is also routinely hit on by older men... awwkwaard. * This troper is always mistaken to be a few years younger than he is(18)and is sometimes mistaken as a girl * Once, when I was 15 (I'm now 18), my sister and I went to the DMV to get our [=IDs=]. I wanted to start driving, so my mother asked if a Driver's Ed book was available. The lady behind the counter pointed at my TWELVE YEAR OLD sister saying that she could have it. She then pointed at me saying I'll have to wait until I was thirteen to get the book. I was FIFTEEN.

* This troper is frequently mistaken for the twin sister of her cousin. Her cousin is twelve. She is sixteen and a half. This was made worse when she got her hair cut, and her cousin started growing HIS hair out, and they were mistaken for identical twins. Got better when her hair started growing out and her chest started growing. ** Inverted in that this troper was hit on by a teenage boy (at least 15) when she was about nine or ten. And her dad was right there, listening, too. *** He could have just been into lolis. * This troper got told he was around 18 when he was actually 25. He has no issues whatsoever talking with friends 4-5 years younger than him, and a lot of people think he's younger than he is. The joys of growth retardation (although that is only 1-2 years). * I thought my grandmother was in her 50's. Nope. Around her 80's. * Oh until turned 30 [[Tropers/StarePris This Troper]] was asked for ID whenever went to buy smokes for his mom. Yes even at 29 he could pass for being under 21 years old. * Not too long ago, I, at the age of 17, handed an application for a summer volunteering position at the local historical society. The women at the counter was very confused, saying that she thought i looked fourteen, fifteen at the very oldest. Said troper is 6'3 with a soul patch, and since the age of fifteen has on occasion been mistaken for a twenty something. I told her that she is the first person in years to underestimate my age, and she told me that i had a Passing resemblence to her son, who had just turned 14. * After I had just turned 12, I went to a political forum and submitted a question to be answered. Some guy thought the little kid at the bipartisan talk was cute, and put, "Asked by a 10 year old" on the question submission sheet when I passed it up to the front. The speakers read the question out loud, and to my mortification, called out, "Who's the ten-year-old?" I stood up and protested I was 12, but after answering my question, they continued to refer to me as "the ten-year-old" throughout the entire thing. Which, if I didn't mention before, was TELEVISED. Imagine how humiliated I was. * When [[{{Tropers/Kalle}} I]] attempted to buy the ''SouthPark'' movie on DVD a few years ago, I was asked by the checkout lady if I was over seventeen. I was ''twenty'' at the time. Almost three years have passed, and I still get surprised looks from people when I tell them how old I am -- they all think I'm still in high school! * Me (jinxed blackcat). I'm 19 and 6 months... I get mistaken for 14 or so.. Sometimes I'm even genderflipped from miss to sir. * This troper's mother is regularly mistaken for his sister (or, more rarely, ''girlfriend''). * The older this troper gets, the more she appreciates fitting this trope. Especially around birthdays. * This troper being 23 does not completely shave his facial hair because if I would do my hair a certain way and have all of my facial hair shaved off, I would probably look no older than 12 ro 13 years old. ** Same with this troper. I still get carded for ''food samples at the supermarket''! * This troper is also older than he looks often times I was mistaken

for a teenager, sometimes when buying r-rated movies I am sometimes asked to show my I.D., and I'm in my twenties, and sometimes they think my brother is older than me because he is so tall but he is two years younger than me, I often grow out my beard so I look older now. * This troper (who is sixteen years and nine months old at the time of writing) was recently told that she looked younger than that. This immediately caused me to wonder how old I looked now; for most of my life I was a HugeSchoolgirl who was generally taken to be 2-4 years older than whatever my actual age was at the time, but I stopped growing at around 14 due to my terrible sleeping habits. Height aside, my face hasn't changed noticeably since then either, so maybe I still look 14? I guess time will tell. (I think it runs in the family, too. My dad's 50 and looks about fortyish.) ** I also know someone (over the internets, not in real life) who I'm pretty sure is in his mid-twenties to thirties; he looks about fifteen. * This Troper has also gone from HugeSchoolgirl to this. At 16, I could easily pass for 20. Recently, while buying wine as a birthday present for someone, I was asked to prove I'm over 18. I'm '''twentyfreaking-six'''. ** My sympathies; a few years ago this troper was at the grocery store at 10am on a weekday and the cashier asked why I wasn't in school. After asking how old she thought I was ("16 or so") I had to show ID before my real age (25) was believed. At the age of 26 I was carded at the local animal shelter before being allowed into the dog room. With pigtails and sneakers, I can even squidge it down to 15. Sadly I've been passing for 16ish since [[MostCommonSuperPower the age of 12]]. This is why I don't leave the house without makeup! * Usually inverted with [[Tropers/DarkInsanity13 this troper]] (once she was asked if she came back from university to help out at the local ribfest when she was 16, and has never been asked about questionable manga books for older teens, despite one of the first series she bought being ''{{Chobits}}''...she was 14), but there have been occasions (as of recently, due to coming back for her 5th year of high school) where people assume she's younger than than 18. Oddly enough, she doesn't ''feel'' like she's 18. ** A straighter example was an instance with her mother; she (mother) was visiting Chicago for a Rotary convention of sorts, and while hanging out at a local bar or restaurant, she was asked if she was there with her mother by an older man. Her mother was at least 40 at the time. The friend and fellow club member she was with wasn't even 10 years older than her. ** Same troper's Ancient Civilizations teacher has a 10-year-old daughter. Many students truthfully tell her she looks to be about 25 or younger (this troper agrees with them). She jokes about giving them all A's. Actually, she (troper) has pinned several of her teachers to be younger than they are...it makes it hard when one of her English teachers surfs, snowboards, plays guitar, goes rock-climbing (and is in charge of the rock-climbing club at that), and enjoys indy and rock bands. A new substitute teacher once said he was at the school when she was going through, and she thought he was one of the students... * This troper, at 14, was confused to be his neighbour's daughter's

father, helped along by how my face looked aged with stress and that we had similar hair. Later, when this troper was 16, he was confused to be a seminarian not only by his looks, but also by his speech. * [[Tropers/FreezairForALimitedTime This troper]], to her occasional annoyance. She's been carded for buying cough syrup, which she doesn't mind... But once, while at a restaurant, she was asked if she wanted the 13-and-under kid's menu. She's ''twenty.'' If she looks twelve, then that waiter must be seeing an awful lot of [[MostCommonSuperPower well-endowed]] twelve-year-olds. ** Actually, alot of THIRD GRADERS are getting large breasts now. * This troper was once at a mall by himself and decided to play at one of the Wii booths that were set up in the halls. The booth attendant asked where his parents were. He had to explain that he was 19 years old... He's now a year older and is still asked about his age by various people who think he's too young to be wandering around by himself. * This troper, now 31, still gets mistaken for younger (often ''much'' younger) by many people, to the point where they act genuinely surprised when he mentions his real age. Choice incidents include a salescritter in the printer department at Micro Center asking him if he was writing a paper (in 2006, not 1995), and one friend describing him as "will be carded for alcohol ''forever''". * [[{{Tropers/Nomic}} This troper]] gets pretty much consistently mistaken for a 16-year old despite being over 20. He recently started growing a beard to look older, but currently it just makes him look like a teenager who's trying to grow a beard. * [[Tropers/MrInitialMan This troper]] has a terrible time telling age. He's ID'ed people over ''forty!'' * This troper has a friend who constantly gets away with paying youth fares on the bus. Depending on how she's dressed, she can look anywhere from sixteen to ''twelve''. She's ''twenty-three''. * This troper is sixteen years old, but tops out just short of five feet and comes with a young face to boot -- some people don't even think she belongs in high school, much less as a junior. When she went to the mall with her mom, one of the women selling makeup commented she looked like she was twelve. She also said that this troper's thirty-six year-old mother looked like she was only in her late twenties, so it seems to be at least a little genetic. The first sign of all this was being mistaken as a kindergartener by a teacher when she was in the first grade -- nothing drastic, but far from the last age confusion. * This troper's mother. She looks at most in her early 40s, but the truth is she's turning 50 this year. This troper hopes that she's inherited her genes. * This troper's brother was born in 1979 and was recently asked for ID to prove he was over 21 in a restaurant. "Take it as a compliment" doesn't really cover it. * This troper gets the inverse. He is regularly mistaken for 17-18, despite being 16. If he was four inches taller, to about 5'10", he could pass for twenty. * This troper, a few years ago, was attending a surprise party for her grandfather and was enumerating the identities of guests for

someone who was, for reasons unexplained, taking attendance. --->'''Troper:''' ...and my husband just left to pick up my little sister. --->'''Woman:''' Your husband! Oh, you're so young to be married! --->'''Troper, confused:''' I'm twenty-five. --->'''Woman:''' ...I thought you were sixteen. ** It should be noted this apparently runs in the family. Troper's mother is fifty-one and is usually mistaken for around thirty-five. * This troper. Full. Stop. She's almost 23 but regularly gets mistaken for 15 or younger. Her mother's like this too--she's 45 but is often mistaken for being in her late 20's-early 30's. Every time the two of them go out to dinner together, this troper is given a ''kids' menu''. Said troper has developed a complex because of it, fearing that no one will take her seriously because of her appearance, and wondering what it says about the [[{{Lolicon}} guys who are attracted to her...]] ** UnfortunateImplications indeed.... *** Implications nothing. She's been hit on by two different pedophiles. It's a very legitimate concern. * This troper was surprised when she found out her lab partner at college was married and had a baby. Even the troper herself is mistaken for a 15-16 year old when she is actually 18. Her brother is a subversion, one time he was thought to be her father even though he is 6 years older than her. * This troper is a nineteen-year-old sophomore in college at the time of this writing, and I'm getting sick and tired of being asked what year of high school she's in. Once last summer, in the grocery store, my mom, my sister and I were mentioning my then-fifteen-year-old brother (we hadn't had our fall birthdays yet) and he was away at band camp. The female cashier (who was probably in her mid-to-late fifties) asked, "So he's the oldest?" We had mentioned his age, so I was thinking, "Just how old do I look to you, lady?" I will concede that when my hair is in braided pigtails, I could pass for a somewhat mature 13-14-year-old (but my hair was down during that specific incident). ** Looking young also seems to run in said troper's family, since my dad is 52 and gets mistaken for being in his early 40s--and once, at Six Flags, while he was 41, one of those "Guess Your Age/Weight/Birth Month?" ladies mistook him for 28. And when my mother turned 50 last year, she asked her students to guess how old she was, and most of them guess early 40s and someone guess 35 (which made her quite happy). * The twenty-something youth director at this troper's church has been mistaken for a middle-schooler on multiple occasions. Once at a high school football game, a teacher told her to go back to the middle school section. Another time, a cashier at the local Walgreens wouldn't let her in to the store because apparently only a certain amount of unaccompanied middle-schoolers are allowed in at a time. * This troper still gets carded for 15+ things. He'll be 19 in a month. * [[Tropers/BooBooBob I]]'m 35 and still get carded but I could get into clubs at 16.

* At this troper's last job, the dress code forbade him from having a beard, but he was able to keep his mustache. Most people thought he was around 30 years old. He's 22. Now he's been able to grow his beard back, and people mistake him for 40. He's also never been carded in his life, which allowed him to play pool at a local bar at 16. * A Main/BerserkButton for [[{{Tropers/Lina}} this troper]], especially when people tell her that she'll enjoy it when she's older. She's currently 23 and is frequently asked if she's in high school. A couple of years ago, while buying admission to a museum, she was informed that "12 and under are free." If you say so, lady. * This 33yr old [[Tropers/RedRajah troper]] had a rather pleasant surprise from her fellow castmates during the last show she was cast in. Both the high school actors and the actors over forty thought she was barely in her 20's (even when she was talking about celebrating her 3rd anniversary). ** Two years later at the SAME theatre company with different castmates, she's still getting the "You look too young to be married" comments. * [[Tropers/AckSed This editor]] has made a game out of this trope in real life; when I ask people,"Go on,guess my age" they ''never'' get it right. I've gotten anything from 19 years old to 26 -- it's hilarious. [[spoiler:I'm currently '''30''']]. It backfired recently when I was carded by a humourless bouncer:"That [Student I.D.] won't do. Driver's license or passport please." "I don't have a driver's license. Dammit,I'm [[spoiler:thirty]] years old!" "You're [[spoiler:thirty]]? Why didn't you say so?" * stands aside* ** Am I the only one who read the Bouncer's voice as a [[MassEffect Turian]] in my head? * [[{{Tropers/Duckay}} This troper]] faced this with a workmate the other day. They saw me parking my car and commented that they're surprised; they didn't realise I was seventeen (the age you can get a license) already. I was ''almost twenty''. * One of this troper's crushes is 21, but appears to be 10. Another one appears to be 13, but is actually 20. Guess what? This troper is a Lolicon. * Played straight ''and'' inverted with [[Tropers/KylerThatch this troper]]. Often I get people who ask what year in high school I am, forgetting that I'm already in college. Other times, because of the facial hair, people think I'm already twenty-something when I'm still just [[spoiler:19]] years old. * When [[Tropers/RTaco this troper]] was 18, he had to re-take freshman English. No one in the class thought he was any older than 15, and his teacher for that class nearly pulled him out of the senior photo just before a very awkward [[TheReveal conversation]]. Now 20 years old, he often is able to pay less for movie tickets by passing for a minor, and gets regularly mistaken for being 16. * [[{{Tropers/Nightsky}} This troper]] was once mistaken for 15-16, at 24. And got carded, buying booze, two months ago--age 30. w00t. * This troper's friend is seventeen and in her last year of high school, and there are many people who think she looks ''ten''. There are also at least two teachers in this troper's high school who are mistaken for being in their late 30s or early 40s when they're

actually fifty-something. * This troper, having fairly recently turned 20, was met with surprise when she mentioned being excited about voting in the 2008 election-- everyone apparently assumed she was too young to vote. She has a general tendency to be mistaken for someone four or five years younger. * This troper's paternal grandparents once got stopped by the police while traveling because they mistook my grandfather for a pedophile kidnapper and my grandmother for his victim. My granny was in her mid to late twenties at the time (and my grandfather five years older.) Her mother was also once almost arrested due to being mistaken for a teenage runaway while traveling in college. As this troper has inherited these genes from both sides of the family and is 5'0, it should come as no surprise that she is 18 and is generally mistaken for anywhere between 12 and 16. On the first day of senior year, someone asked if she was a freshman. * [[{{Tropers/Mac}} This troper]], a college student, was observing a sixth grade classroom and mistaken for part of the class. By the class. * Due to his skinny build, somewhat short height, kinda dorky haircut and a childish looking face [[{{Tropers/Kingogtheingdaw}} This 15 year old troper]] is in grade ten and is mistaken for being a niner. Also when the youth prices at movies theaters are 13 and below I can pass off as being 13 as well. * This troper, while twenty-four, is frequently thought to be sixteen or seventeen. Following just as frequently are thoughts of her being fourteen, including one single guess of thirteen. Apparently, this runs in the family as my grandmother was once mistaken for my mother's sister when they were both much younger. Her mother was also asked well into her thirties for ID. Of course, because of her maturity, throughout elementary school she was often thought two-to-three years older. This is the first-born kid whose mother couldn't find the kindergarten room because they all looked like second graders to her, I was ''tiny'' due to growth problems. Thus, this troper was dumbstruck the time she was once mistaken for her five-years-younger sisters' mother. Conversely, her sister is of the Younger Than She looks and had once been drooled over by a college friend before he learned her true age. * This troper recently learned that one of the guys a friend of his at college hangs out with is ''not'' a student here. He's part of the musician crowd around campus, but he's a professional, not a hobbyist. I assumed he was 21-22 years old, an impression he actually prefers to cultivate, since it makes it seem less weird that he spends most of his time hanging out with college students, but he's actually 38. * [[{{Tropers/djTenku}} This troper]] is 20 years old. It doesn't help that her parents have this same ability as her mother is 40 and looks 30 and her father is 45 who looks 35. There have been times that people were absolutely floored when she tells them her age, and they always reply with, "Oh, I thought you were 12 years old! You'll definitely appreciated when you're much older!" God forbid when she helps out her mother with grading papers at the middle school. * This troper is 18 but guess ranges for his age are in the 14-16

range. It does not help that he is 5'4" and has a very skinny conformation. ** Said troper also managed to pass for 12-13 at age 15. ** Said troper's grandparents look about 60, they are 80+ . ** Said troper's aunt looks 10-25. She's in her early 30s. * This troper has a friend who until recently would often be mistaken for a middle-schooler. In fact, when I first met her, I thought she was like me at the time a high-school freshman. She was a sohpomore. If it wasn't for the fact that almost everyone in the school knows who she is, they'd be still making the same mistake. On the other hand, this is inverted with me. For some reason people never card me when going out. * This troper is short and flat chested, and she never wears make-up or heels. During her first week in a new college class, she was regularly mistaken for being too young for college, with guesses varying from 10(!) to 14. She was 19 at the time. Now she's 21 and is usually mistaken for being between 14 and 16. * This troper is a junior in High School who is often mistaken for a freshman or younger, but there's also a guy he knows that is almost a full year older than he is who looks sounds AND acts like a 6th or 7th grader. The guy is quite famous around the school because of it. However there is a another student this troper has seen around, whom at this point is a sophomore who looks no older than A 4TH GRADER! I am not making this up! * This troper's family has this in spades. Both parents look ten to twenty years younger than they are, meanwhile this troper apparently got mistaken for middle school while she was talking about biology and diseases with a pair of six-year-olds. * This troper grew his facial hair specifically to avert this trope. In eighth grade a student mistook him for a sixth-grader, in restaurants he was offered the kids' menu ''even after the mustache started coming in,'' and in his senior year of high school he was told that if he shaved he could pass for twelve. * [[Tropers/JChance This troper]] got carded for an R-rated movie at 22, and still looks several years younger than his real age of 28 despite a mix of sinus trouble and an interesting life giving him very tired-looking eyes. So does his thirty-year-old [[HeterosexualLifePartners roommate]]. Both, though, [[YoungerThanTheyLook invert]] this when they don't shave, to the point that he jokes about "cutting off ten years." And he prefers the former to the latter. He is way too young to be almost 30, damnit. * The common consensus among those she's asked and those who have been shocked by her real age is that [[SovietKitty this twenty-oneyear-old troper]] looks twelve. Her first time voting, she caused quite a stir at a polling place, resulting in a man asking another, "What's voting age, 'cause that girl looks twelve!" She took advantage of "eleven and under get in free" rules until she was fifteen, and only stopped because she felt bad doing it. Disturbingly enough, she is a [[{{Lolicon}} fanboy magnet]] and has men follow her around in stores. Most are in their mid-twenties, but some have been at least fifty. * When this troper was in the eleventh grade (16-17 years old), one