VICARIOUS GAME ADVENTURES ON F*CEB**K When I first started my F*ceb**k adventures I was like the proverbial kid in a candy

shop. While not a grandmaster of F*ceb**k gaming Now that I have joined the rank of expert gamers I have waved goodbye to Maf*a W*rs, C*fe W*rld, Tiki F*rm, C*astle Age and countless adventure games. Now I clear brush, raise animals, travel the Pi*neer Tr*il, Send items or visit the homesteads of my fellow players. I also play F*rmville, but for the most part I just drop in for a few minutes Click on gift requests and feed a few animals On my Engl*sh C**ntrys*de Farm. I have been Zyngafied more than once, But alas I still feel a pull like a Sirens Call As I hear peppy midi music reminiscent of slot machines in a casino. Dementedly I click away, Harvesting everything in sight, Ranging from bright orange pumpkins to dark blue oxen, I am greeted by now comfortably familiar sound effects: Duck quacks, bear growls, sheep bleating, cow bellowing, ax chopping, Barks from my yellow labs Spooky & Tid Bitty, And my characters, when clicked on, yelling, Howdy! Let us not forget the whack, whack, whack of hammers pounding nails into new buildings Or the hullabaloo of chickens, frenziedly beating their wings, as foxes and coyotes snap them up! Where has the time gone? Tomorrow Ill be back to socialize from the safety of invisible internet walls. Once, not several times a day, As I did for a short while before the novelty wore away. If I stay away too long I will return to withered plants, And a town filled with bristling lime green cacti, thorny brown tumble weeds, Rock piles and bone white cattle skulls filled with snakes that will need clobbering. So another gaming day or night or afternoon will dawn And I will be serenaded by funky fiddle music, Probably several times in less than thirty minutes, While Mad Jacks cartoon face appears again to quip, BLASTED INTERNET! As my homestead slowly,

Like charging garden snails, Materializes one item at a time, For the umpteenth time. WTO 9/2011