7 things you should never say to your partner Sometimes our secret thoughts just slip out in a clumsy

splutter of word vomit, and boom were in the doghouse again. We present you with seven things you should never say to your partner. Ignore this at your peril. What not to say, rule 1: My ex used to do that too! Whether youre complimenting your partner, or highlighting a less than favourable flaw, comparing your current partner to an ex is not, under any circumstances, a good idea. Telling your other half how a former flame used to give excellent fo ot massages, or even a catty comment about their awful dress sense, will not go down well with your lady/gentleman friend and is a recipe for disaster as your o ther half wonders why this ex is on your mind in the first place. Next time you experience boyfriend or girlfriend dj vu, do yourself a favour and keep it on the down-low. What not to say, rule 2: Dont you think [insert relevant name] is pretty/handsome? This question is just plain annoying and sets your partner up in a lose/lose sit uation, which is a recipe for disaster. There are plenty of conversation starter s out there that can be used without having to resort to this, so avoid question s based on other peoples looks. The first trap you set up for your partner with t his question is if they disagree with you. Weve all done it; they disagree and yo u brand them as a liar and say you wouldnt have minded if they agreed with you in the first place (Pfft, of course they can say that someone else is attractive y oure not that insecure!). The second major pitfall that your partner runs a high risk of falling into is agreeing with you. Yes they say, she/he is gorgeous, and boo m theyve been figured out. You knew they fancied this person all along. Mind game s arent a good recipe for a successful relationship, so avoid them at all costs. What not to say, rule 3: Dont drool over the opposite sex Some people dont struggle with an answer when asked if they think someone else is attractive. If you do find someone of the opposite sex good-looking take a mome nt to gather your thoughts before you start panting in agreement with your partn ers passing comment. When asked if you think a member of the opposite sex is attr active, its often a plea for attention or reassurance neatly disguised as an inno cent question. Yep, this is an invitation for you to gush to your lover about ho w much hotter he/she is, so be tactful with your reply. Try something along the lines of She/he is alright, but theyve got nothing on you. Oh you little charmer! What not to say, rule 4: Can we wrap this sex session up? [Insert favourite TV sh ow] is on in five This one is self-explanatory. Having their sexual performances ranked below a TV programme can lead to severe feelings of inadequacy for your other half. Even i f you have been desperately waiting to find out what happens in the next instalm ent of your favourite programme, just beware of the trouble this could cause if you express your thoughts out loud. Cutting off a sex session is a big time deal breaker. What not to say, rule 5: Im fine, when really youre not The classic passive-aggressive comment Im fine, when youre clearly annoyed that your other half has just switched channels without asking your permission first, cre ates all sorts of trouble for ten minutes time. As you sit there wallowing in yo ur own little bubble of anger, you feel the tension building in the air and youre both just sat there waiting for the other person to talk to break the stressful atmosphere. By the time you get around to actually solving the first problem, y ouve created a whole string of others by being in such a mood in the first place. Youve both said things you didnt mean and now youre just in a tangled web of probl ems that could easily have been avoided. When asked if youre okay, use this is an opportunity to outline whats bothering you, not a chance to feel sorry for yours elf and create a drama. What not to say, rule 6: Do you think its wise to eat that? Asking your lover if they really think its wise to be eating the chocolate smothe red doughnut that is about to disappear into their mouth is a bad move by anyones standards, particularly if your partner is female. Its basically a sugar-coated

version of the phrase, Youve put on weight, stop eating junk. If you have uttered e ither of these phrases, duck now. Leave the house. Dont ever return. What not to say, rule 7: What are you thinking riiight... NOW? Its a question that some of us like to hurl at our partners when theyre least expe cting it. We say it so fast that our other half doesnt have the chance to make up a false reply or even to think straight, which leads him/her to stutter, and th en we accuse them of thinking of their ex or having rude thoughts about someone else. The chances are, they were just pondering what theyre having for tea or how to tackle a difficult situation at work, but when put on the spot they cant real ly remember what they were thinking, let alone put it into a coherent sentence. Even if they did happen to be thinking of having sex with a porn star or getting back with an ex, the last thing theyll do is admit it so this will never really be a constructive question unless they answer thinking of you, but then wed probabl y tell them theyre lying anyway. Our partners simply cant win.