Rikki Erin Bera: A Tribute 14 June 1983 22 September 2012

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STARTING THE SERVICE: On behalf of the Bera and Sommervold families, I would like to extend my most heart-felt thanks and appreciation for every one of you who has taken time out of this busy work day to mourn the passing of my sister, Rikki Erin Bera. More importantly, we have come to celebrate this beautiful woman and to remember the almost countless ways she has touched our lives. I believe with all my heart that my sister lives on, but not just in our memories. Rikki lives on because our lives are different . . . no, our lives are better because we knew her. Before we start, I need to give a disclaimer. I suffer from an affliction that my sister never had to deal with. I . . . am Latino. The part of Rikkis genetic composition that gave her that strong, Stoic, Norwegian approach to life that could face any challenge head-on and kick its butt, I dont have that. Rikkis ethnic background learned how to live in the coldest parts of the globe (like South Dakota) and produced the Vikings. My background invented mojitos and still prefers a nap after lunch. My point is this: like many Latinos, Im a very emotional person, and this is a pretty emotional occasion. So please except my apologies in advance for those times when I lose my composure and dignity, and thank you for your patience. Before we begin, lets pray. Heavenly Father, we come together today to remember a beautiful young woman, Rikki Erin Sommervold Bera. We thank you for blessing us for twenty-nine years with her smile, her laughter, her strength, her passion. We had hoped for more time, Lord; we had hoped for more time. But we are grateful for the nearly three decades that we had, and we are better off today because you brought her into our lives. We ask you to make our memories of and with Rikki more vivid and to protect us from our fear of forgetting. Give us strength to accept our grief, to walk through it, and to see at the far end of that grief the hope of life. Not just new life, but true life. Give us eyes to see you and hearts to feel your presence, to know that you are not far off in our most difficult moments but that you take our pain and feel it as your own. You, Father, know in the truest sense the pain of losing a child; you, Father, know most clearly the comfort that we yearn for now. Walk with us as we remember Rikki. Count our tears; keep them close until that day when you wipe them from our faces. Thank you that we are not alone, that Rikki is not gone, and that you are the Lord and the Author of Life. We put our faith in your promise that you created us for life, that life is our truest state, and that you extend that life to us who bear your image. We offer this prayer in Jesus precious name. Amen. WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS ABOUT DEATH: Death is a normal part of the human experience, but the Bible insists that death is not natural. When God created man and woman in his image, he created them for life, to live within and enjoy his creation and to represent him among the landscapes and lifescapes of this world. Death is an aberration, a thing-out-of-place, like water in a basement or me in Victorias Secret. Death does not belong. Death has no business here. Death was not part of Gods design. If youve read the story of Adam and Eve, of the Garden of Eden and the serpent, then you know that the Bible says that death is the result of sin. We have to be careful here, however; few words are as subject to misunderstanding as that three-letter word, sin. Sin is not just the wrong we do, like stealing or lying or hating or cheating. Sin is also the wrong we suffer. When four friends

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dug through the roof of a crowded house and lowered a paralyzed man on his mat in front of Jesus, Jesus announced to the man, My child, your sins are forgiven (Mark 2.5). What did this mans sins have to do with his paralysis? Was he being punished for having done some evil thing in his youth? Certainly not. Instead, when Jesus pronounces this mans sin forgiven, Jesus releases him from the wrong he has suffered, and in just a few verses Jesus will prove his authority to forgive this mans sins by healing him, telling him to take up his mat and to walk out of the house. And he does!! The man leaves that housenow sporting a new sunlightwith both his spirit and his body restored and renewed. Sinas both the wrong that we do and the wrong that we suffercripples life and leads to death. Death is an aberration. Death is a thing-out-ofplace. Christians believe that Jesus died for sin, that Jesus death cancelled the consequences of sin, and that his victory over death and his resurrection to new life offers us the promise that death will be put back in its place. We wonder at the tragedy of death when it touches a vibrant and lively twenty-nine year old woman. But death is no more natural at ninety-nine than it is at twentynine. Hearts were made to beat. Lungs were made to breathe. Legs were made to walk. Life was made to be lived. Death is a thing-out-of-place, and the good news of the gospel of Jesus Christ is that death, for all of us, has been put back in its place. Lifenot just new life but true life!is ours in the name of Jesus Christ. At this point I have asked three people to come up and read a passage of Scripture over this occasion. As they do so, remember the promise of God, that death has been swallowed up in victory. Revelation 1.46, 1718: Grace and peace to you from the one who is, who always was, and who is still to come; from the sevenfold Spirit before his throne; and from Jesus Christ. He is the faithful witness to these things, the first to rise from the dead, and the ruler of all the kings of the world. All glory to him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by shedding his blood for us. He has made us a Kingdom of priests for God his Father. All glory and power to him forever and ever! Amen. . . . Dont be afraid! I am the First and the Last. 18 I am the living one. I died, but lookI am alive forever and ever! And I hold the keys of death and the grave. 1 Corinthians 15.5157: But let me reveal to you a wonderful secret. We will not all die, but we will all be transformed! It will happen in a moment, in the blink of an eye, when the last trumpet is blown. For when the trumpet sounds, those who have died will be raised to live forever. And we who are living will also be transformed. For our dying bodies must be transformed into bodies that will never die; our mortal bodies must be transformed into immortal bodies. Then, when our dying bodies have been transformed into bodies that will never die, this Scripture will be fulfilled: Death is swallowed up in victory. O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting? For sin is the sting that results in death, and the law gives sin its power. But thank God! He gives us victory over sin and death through our Lord Jesus Christ. Psalm 23, A Psalm of David. The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: He leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his names sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; Thy

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rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. The Bible teaches us that death is a thing-out-of-place. But thanks be to God, death will be put back in its place, and lifenot just new life but true lifewill be ours forever: yours, mine, and Rikkis. REMEMBERING RIKKI: But we did not come here for a Bible lesson. We came here to remember Rikki Erin Bera. I struggled to think of one or two stories of growing up with Rikki that would encapsulate who Rikki was. Rikki was not the kind of woman who could be summed up in one or two stories. You just had to know her. But there are some things that were characteristic Rikki. For example, after our grandfather, Martin Sommervold, passed away in December, 1986, for about a week Rikki would wake up in the middle of the night, come into my bedroom, and climb up into the top of my bunkbed with me. I was nine years old; Rikki was only three. It was the only time my sister and I comforted each other like this. But this was characteristic Rikki even at this young age. Despite Rikkis legendary inner-strength, she was tender-hearted. She did not draw her strength from pushing others away and facing life alone; she drew close to those she could depend on. She drew strength from them and she gave strength to them. Rikki was always a strong individual, but she was never strong individually. But Rikki was not just strong. She was also persistent. Most of you know that she did not pass her state and national certifications for property management on her first attempt. Or her second. Or even her third. It would not have mattered if it took her a hundred attempts, she was going to pass her exams. That persistence, that stubbornness, that pit-bull like lock on a goal once she had decided she was going to do something, that was always a part of her. And I cant say I always liked this about her. When we were younger, her stubbornness affected me in ways I didnt like. If she wanted to watch the Mickey Mouse Club, or Lady and the Tramp (again . . .), I had a better chance of getting water from a rock than of prying the remote control from her hands. But as I grew older, and as I saw the woman she was becoming despite the challenges life put in her path, I learned to admire her persistence, and even to envy it. Too often we convince ourselves to let go of our dreams rather than risk failing to realize them. But not Rikki. What Rikki wanted, Rikki got. Maybe not the first time. Maybe not the second time. But if you thought Rikki was going to give up or change her mind, you were about to learn something about Rikki. I am not the only person in this room with memories or stories about Rikki. Some of you have somethinga story, a thought, or just a comforting wordthat you want to share. We want you to have the chance to tell us what Rikki meant to you, or to tell Rikki what she meant to you. There are two microphones here up front. We invite you to come, as you feel led, to say something to or about Rikki. We can take as much time as you need, so please dont feel like you should keep your words to yourself. We want all of you to be able to remember Rikki, or to say good-bye to her, if you think doing so would be appropriate for you. When it looks like everyone who wants to has expressed themselves, I will come back up here to continue the service. ***

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After listening last night to your stories about Rikki, and after hearing your words this morning, I am blessed to hear how much you loved my sister. Thank you. I take comfort from the love you showed my sister; I take hope in knowing that she has found rest and peace and comfort and . . . and life in the presence and the arms of Jesus Christ. I can only imagine the look on Rikkis face as she experiences true life in Gods presence. I can only imagine the joy I will feel when I see my sister again. I can only imagine the wonder on Rikkis face as she gazes fully into the glory of God. [I Can Only Imagine, 1999 Bart Millard] ENDING THE SERVICE: On a day not far enough back in the past, just a few miles down the 101, I had the honor of joining my sister in marriage to my brother-in-law. On that beautiful April afternoon I issued a challenge to Justin. Heres what I said: If I can offer one piece of advice on your wedding, Justin, let me say: Love Rikki the way her father loves her. Lay everything you have on the line for her sake. Do everything you can to fulfill her dreams. Give everything you are to help her be everything she can be. Be a better husband than Ive been a brother. Love her the way her father loves her. Today, I have a different honor. Today I get to look my brother-in-law in the eye and tell him, Well done. You did it. You loved my sister to the end. You gave yourself to her through better, through worse; through richer, through poorer; in sickness, and in health. You kept your promise. You have shown yourself a man of integrity. I know you will continue to love my sister from this day forward. But today I want to tell you have kept your word. Thank you. For the rest of us, let me leave you with a final word of encouragement. This is without a doubt the hardest path Ive had to walk. I am filled with questions, and I have no answers. Why do young women get cancer? Why do parents bury their children? Why do husbands and brothers and friends and coworkers have to say good-bye to those they love? If I claimed to have answers, I would be lying and the truth would not be in me. The truth is, I simply dont know. But I believe in a God who is bigger than my questions. I believe in a God who sees beyond the horizon of todays pain and who has promised that tomorrow brings blessings unimaginable. I believe in a God who can take my doubt, my anger, my anguish, my pain, and who offers his peace in the midst of these storms. The words of the fourth stanza of the hymn, Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing, describe for me the hope of that peace. O to grace how great a debtor daily Im constrained to be! Let Thy goodness, like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to Thee. Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it, prone to leave the God I love; Heres my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for Thy courts above. If you, like me, find your heart prone to wandering, may Gods goodness, like a fetter, bind us to himself. Jesus death has overcome sin and death. Jesus resurrection is the guarantee of true life, not just for Rikki but for all of us. As we remember Rikki Erin Bera, let us also take care for our own lives. God offers each of us not just new life but true life, if we will take it. Let us pray.

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Father, we entrust into your care Rikki Erin Bera, beloved wife, daughter, sister, friend. We admit we cannot understand why you took her from us so soon. But we thank you for giving her to us so long. We pray our thoughts, our words, our hearts today have honored her and you. Keep her memory burning inside us, like a fire that keeps us warm from the cold and gives us courage to face a new day. Give us faith to see hope in the darkness, to feel love in the loneliness, to know peace in the chaos. And when all other words fail us, Father, give us the strength to say, Our Father, who art in heaven, Hallowed be Thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, On earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For Thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, forever and ever. Amen. My family would like to invite all of you to Greg and Pattis home for lunch. There are maps available out in the foyer near the guest sign-in book. If you have any questions, please feel free to come see me, and Ill do my best to get you pointed in the right direction. Again, thank you, on behalf of the Bera and Sommervold families, for the love and friendship you have shown my sister. May the LORD bless you and protect you. May the LORD smile on you and be gracious to you. May the LORD show you his favor and give you his peace. (Numbers 6.2426 NLT)