Breaking Dawn

Bella’s pregnancy from Bella’s point of view

(From Bella’s conversation with Rosalie)

“Hello?” the voice like golden chimes answered.
“Rosalie?” I whispered “It’s Bella. Please. You have to help me.”

8. Surreal
“Bella, what is it?” Her voice sounded weird. There was a soft edge to her
voice which I did not recognise.
It was almost as hard to tell her as it was Carlisle but I new Rosalie would
understand how much I loved my little nudger.
“I think…well, I think, that…I might be… pregnant” I managed to
sputter out.
“Oh” she sounded shocked.
“I know.” I said.
“Oh, Bella.” She said sighing. “What do you want me to do?”
“Rosalie, Edward wants to get rid of it…”
But she interrupted me guessing what I was going to say.
“But you don’t want to.” She finished but her voice was soft.
“You understand.” I asked her hopefully.
“Of course. I would have done the same thing if I was in your position.”
“Well that’s a relief, but what about Edward?” I asked scared again.
“Don’t you worry about that I’ll take care of him.” She sounded
confident, I hoped she was.
“Thanks Rose” I said gratefully.
“Don’t mention it all you need to do is take it easy, don’t stress yourself
out, it’s bad for the baby.”
“I know thank you again Rose, I owe you.”
“Yeah you do.” She laughed “See you soon.”
“Bye.”
“Bye.”
I hung up as I heard Edward coming down the hallway.
He came round the corner his face blank and expressionless again.
“Ready?” He said his voice lifeless.
“Yes” I whispered. Had he heard my conversation, I didn’t think so.
Relief washed though me again.
He crossed the room and scooped me into his arms.
I didn’t look back at the house until we made it to the small boat.
As Edward drove away from the island I looked back at the tiny land
mass. The sun was rising and I saw the green specks of the top of the
trees.
I will miss this place very much, it felt like home.
I lifted my feet up onto the seat, warped my arms around them and rested
my head against my knees.
I felt Edwards’s eyes on me but I didn’t lift my head.
I wasn’t ready to be a mother.
I knew when I said I didn’t mind giving up children for Edward that if I
was to become pregnant I would keep the baby.
This solid fact was oddly comforting but getting Edward to comply with
this fact was another thing.
I hoped Rosalie was able to help me else I massive hole in heart would be
created.
“Bella come on” Called Edward from far away.
“Huh” was my answer, I lifted my head.
His face was soft but it didn’t reach his eyes.
He tugged at the arm that was wrapped around my knees. I surrendered to
him.
He gave the directions to the driver when we made it to the taxi waiting,
and then wrapped his arms around me.
It was really surreal what was happening everything seemed to be in the
fast forward motion on a tape player.
First we were in the little boat. Then we were in the taxi, and then before
I knew it we were on the plane to Seattle.
My mind was out of control as we made it though terminals.
Rosalie’s promise was always at the front of the mess that was my mind
I’ll take care of him I hope the others would see my side to, because I
knew if they all were against me except Rosalie I would not be able to
win.
Maybe Esme would be on my side. She knew how it was to be a mother.
She’d jumped of a cliff because her baby had died.
I loved my little nudger as much as I loved Edward and I would keep
fighting for him though the good and the bad until he was safe and well.
How could I run when I loved him so much? I loved my little nudger as
much as Edward and now he was coming I knew I wanted to keep him.
I could feel Edwards stress in the way he held me on the plane. He was
too cold and rigid. He was trying to comfort me to tell me everything will
be ok but he was just in fear for my health.
I would make it though this. Even though it will be life treating for me
how could I not give my life for someone I truly loved?
If my life was all I had to give how could I not give it?
The flight to North America was long but not comfortable as it had been
on the flight to South America.
I was edgy and quiet. I starred out of the plane window thinking about my
little nudger.
My hand were folded across my little bump that a maturated in less than a
day, waiting for him to nudge me again.
Maybe he could feel my stress and that’s why he kept nudging me.
I hoped not because if that was he case he was suffering and I didn’t want
him to feel any pain.
I finally managed to fall asleep only to be woken almost immediately by
Edward when the plane was descending towards the ground.
“Bella, wake up sweetheart we need to go.” I opened my eyes.
Edwards golden eyes were confused or was I imaging that. I don’t know.
I was past reason at this point.
I let him pull me from the plane, keeping me close to his side as he
collected our bags and made our way outside.
Our family were waiting outside in the shadows of a large pillar.
Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Jasper and Alice all wore faces of confusion.
Only Rosalie wore a mask of understanding. She opened her arms for me
and I hurried into them breaking into sobs as she hugged me.
“Don’t worry” she said soothingly. “It’ll be okay.”
As she spoke the words a nudge inside my body made me want to throw
up.
I clapped a hand over my mouth willing not to throw up here. And put my
other hand on my stomach.
I closed my eyes and controlled my body reaction.
Carlisle spoke after I had released my mouth.
“How are you Bella?” he asked his voice calm like he always was.
“I don’t know.” I admitted. “I just feel weird like I told you before and
someone keep’s kicking me.”
“Alright Bella come on we need to get it out of you.” This made it clear
that Rosalie had not told them.
I looked at her scared and she spoke to Carlisle.
“Carlisle?” Said Rosalie confidently.
He turned.
“Yes Rose.”
“Carlisle, Bella loves her baby and wants to keep it.”
All of them gasped and I stared at the floor embarrassed my face turning
red again.
Emmett broke the silence.
“Is that what you’ve been acting so weird Rose?” he asked no hint of
humour in his usual jokey attitude.
“Yes Emmett.” She said still confidently.
“Bella?” said Carlisle carefully, I looked up.
His face was a mixture of confusion and exasperation.
“Bella we don’t the outcome if you pursue this.”
I answered him calmly not daring to look at Edwards face.
“I know Carlisle, I’m just as scared as you are but I love him and I don’t
think I could live with myself if he was gone now.”
Carlisle was about to answer when Esme spoke for the first time.
“Bella I know exactly what you mean when I lost my baby I couldn’t live
with myself either, come here.” She opened her arms for me and I went
into them gratefully.
She hugged me carefully stoking my hair. “Don’t worry sweetheart, it all
be okay.”
“Thank you Esme” I said bursting into sobs again.
When she let of me I pulled my self together again.
Then I finally looked at Edward.
His face was exasperated, scared and confused all at the same time. His
eyes were slowly turning to black and they were filled with fear.
This fear I knew was to be expected.
He feared for my health, for my life. Just like I feared for his and our
baby.
He like Esme and Rosalie opened his arms for me.
I hesitated at first then ran to him.
He wrapped his arms around me just as I did to him and nestled his face
in my hair. I rested my face against his marble chest.
He was too cold again his anger was leaking though his control.
Suddenly he whispered in my ear so no one else could hear.
“Bella, please try to be reasonable, we don’t know what this will do to
you.”
I answered him scared of his reaction.
“Edward, I love him almost as much as I love you, do you really want to
put me though that.”
He ignored my question but this time he spoke to Carlisle over the top of
my head.
“Carlisle this is going to damage her health quite severally she’s already
got morning sickness and a little bump everything about her condition is
sped up we need to get it out of her before it can harm her.”
Rosalie, Emmett and Esme growled at him but Carlisle answered him
calmly.
“We can’t ignore her wish Edward and with Esme against this I can’t help
you unless Bella changes her mind which…” he looked at me. “Which it
looks like she had no intention of doing, we need to get her home to
check her out.”
“Good idea Carlisle” Said Rose. “Come on Bella.”
She opened the car door for me and Edward and I slid into the back seat
while Carlisle and Esme got into the front.