STAND-UP

A Professional Guide
to Comedy Magic

Ian Keable

Stand-Up
A Professional Guide to Comedy Magic
By Ian Keable

ISBN 978-0-9557353-0-1
Printed and bound in the United Kingdom
First Edition, 2008

Published by
Ian Keable, London
www.iankeable.co.uk
ian@iankeable.co.uk

2008 Copyright Ian Keable.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a
retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means electronic,
mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise without the prior written
permission of Ian Keable.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
I would like to thank the following magicians for their assistance in the writing of this
book. From the UK: Paul Daniels, Wayne Dobson, Geoffrey Durham, Graham Jolley,
John Lenahan, Paul Zenon, Noel Britten, Derren Brown, Neal Austin, John Archer,
Mel Mellers, Andy Nyman, Terry Herbert, Alan Shaxon and Mandy Muden. From the
US: Mac King, Jeff Hobson, Mike Caveney, Michael Finney, John Carney, Levent,
The Amazing Johnathan, Max Maven, David Williamson and Mark Kornhauser.
All of these gave freely of their advice, dealing with my torrent of questions with
restraint and tolerance. In some cases they allowed me to freely quote from their
own writings, whether they were from magazine interviews, articles or books.
I should stress, though, that what is written about any other performer is solely my
own interpretation and may not necessarily reflect what they themselves think.
I would particularly like to thank the late, and great, Billy McComb. When I sent
him by email the many quotes from his own writings liberally sprinkled throughout
this book, he promptly rang me from the US to chat about them. Billy epitomised for
me what great stand-up is all about. It was Billy, along with Paul Daniels,
who undoubtedly influenced me the most in my formative years as a stand-up.
I have quoted favourably from, and occasionally taken issue with, a number
of books. Of the more contemporary ones I would especially like to acknowledge
Maximum Entertainment by Ken Weber, The Magic of Showbiz Updated for the 90s by
Simon Lovell, Strong Magic by Darwin Ortiz and The Banquet Magicians Handbook by
David Charvet. All are essential reading for those wanting to perform stand-up.
Quality DVDs of stand-up comedy magic are presently few and far between.
Of the ones I have watched, Mel Mellers Tickling The Mind, Michael Finneys
Live at Lake Tahoe! and The World-Renowned Magic of Paul Potassy are particularly
notable. I have also liberally taken extracts from Rich Marottas underrated
Stand-Up Comedy & Magic.
David Britland and Walt Lees deserve my thanks for looking at some of the early
drafts of the book and making suggestions that have substantially improved what
you are now reading. Lesley Fitton went beyond the call of duty in extensively proof
reading, making numerous grammatical and other corrections. My gratitude to
Cathy Keable-Elliott who I also roped in. I owe a huge debt to Geoffrey Durham for
his assistance, encouragement and spotting many errors. Nevertheless its only
right that I should make the usual caveat that any mistakes or omissions are
entirely my own.
Chris (I only draw the pictures!) Power provided the artwork for the cover of
the book. As usual I am lost in admiration at his talent and his generosity.
A special thank you to Noel Britten for not only writing the foreword to the
book but also making a number of corrections to make sure I didnt put my foot
in it too often.
Finally I would like to thank myself because without me this book wouldnt have
been written.

Dedicated to George & Carly, hoping one day they will know what
their Daddy does when he goes to work

A WARNING
I sincerely hope it will not be slavishly copied, as if that is all a reader can
do having read this book, then so far as he is concerned my labour has been
in vain. Edward Maurice
The successful completion of this book has been wholly dependent on the goodwill
of a number of magicians who have given me permission to quote both from their
own writings and also, occasionally, from their act. I would stress that in no way does
the inclusion of any lines or bits of business from the performers mentioned
constitute permission for any of their material to be used by anybody else apart from
the originator. Saying you read about it in this book will not be accepted as a
legitimate excuse, reason or justification for stealing the fruits of their creativity.

CONTENTS
FOREWORD ............................................................................................17
FIRST THINGS FIRST..................................................................................19
What Is Stand-Up? ................................................................................19
The Magic Effect................................................................................19
Dead Time ........................................................................................20
The Author............................................................................................20
Some Definitions ..................................................................................21
The Way Forward ................................................................................22
PART 1: THE BIG TWO..................................................................24
CHAPTER 1: COMEDY ..............................................................................25
Introduction ..........................................................................................25
The Strength Of Comedy........................................................................25
Other Advantages Of Comedy ..............................................................26
Improving your Act ..........................................................................26
Character Development ......................................................................26
Misdirection ......................................................................................27
Lightweight Magic ............................................................................27
Reasons For Not Using Comedy ............................................................27
Im a Magician, not a Comedian ........................................................27
Im not a Funny Person ......................................................................29
Im a Mind Reader and Mind Readers are not Funny ............................29
Dangers Of Comedy ............................................................................30
Bit of Comedy, Bit of Magic................................................................30
Laughing At, not With ........................................................................31
Laughter of Embarrassment ................................................................32
Jokes Versus Lines..................................................................................33
Jokes ................................................................................................33
Disadvantage of Jokes........................................................................34
Lines ................................................................................................35
Example Of A Comedy Routine ..............................................................36
Workings..........................................................................................36
The Climax ......................................................................................38
Conclusion ..........................................................................................39

CONTENTS 7

CHAPTER 2: CHARACTER ........................................................................40

Introduction ..........................................................................................40
Aspects Of Character Magicians ............................................................40
Easy to Define ..................................................................................40
Style ..............................................................................................40
Situation of Conflict ..........................................................................41
Trick Selection ..................................................................................42
Finding My Character............................................................................43
First Attempts ....................................................................................43
Change of Direction ..........................................................................45
Coming Together ..............................................................................45
Finding Other Magicians Characters ......................................................46
Jeff Hobson ......................................................................................46
John Archer ......................................................................................47
The Great Soprendo ..........................................................................47
Mr Mysto..........................................................................................48
Graham Jolley ..................................................................................48
Mel Mellers ......................................................................................48
Noel Britten ......................................................................................49
Paul Daniels ......................................................................................50
Mac King ........................................................................................50
Neal Austin ......................................................................................50
Michael Finney..................................................................................51
Mark Kornhauser ..............................................................................52
Finding Your Character ..........................................................................52
Being Yourself ..................................................................................52
Clothes ............................................................................................53
Getting There ....................................................................................53
Conclusion ..........................................................................................54
PART 2: WHAT TO SAY ................................................................55
CHAPTER 3: LINES....................................................................................56
Introduction ..........................................................................................56
Situation Lines ......................................................................................56
Card in Cigarette ..............................................................................57
Character Lines ....................................................................................59
Character-Situation Lines ....................................................................59
Why They Work ................................................................................61
Making Them Unique ........................................................................62
Remembering Lines ................................................................................63

8 CONTENTS

Ad-Libs ................................................................................................64
Rehearsed Ad-Libs ............................................................................65
Examples ..........................................................................................65
Progressing The Plot ..............................................................................67
Moving Forward................................................................................67
Plot Template ....................................................................................67
Serious Lines ........................................................................................70
Conclusion ..........................................................................................71
CHAPTER 4: FINDING AND BREAKING IN LINES ......................................72
Introduction ..........................................................................................72
Writing ................................................................................................72
Finding Lines ........................................................................................72
Standard ........................................................................................73
Book ..............................................................................................74
Performing ......................................................................................74
Own ..............................................................................................75
Writers ............................................................................................77
Other Magicians ..............................................................................77
Breaking In Lines ..................................................................................78
Delivery............................................................................................79
Character ........................................................................................80
Audience ..........................................................................................81
Funny ..............................................................................................81
Constructing A Routine ..........................................................................81
Adding ............................................................................................82
Cutting ............................................................................................83
Substitution ......................................................................................84
Completely New................................................................................84
Putting It Together ..................................................................................85
Lines For Sucker Silk ............................................................................86
Conclusion ..........................................................................................88
CHAPTER 5: OTHER PATTER MATTERS ........................................................89
Introduction ..........................................................................................89
Call Backs ............................................................................................89
Running Gags ......................................................................................90
Catch Phrases ......................................................................................91
Topping The Gag ..................................................................................92
Converting Laugh To Magic....................................................................93
Innuendo ..............................................................................................94

CONTENTS 9

Self-Deprecation ....................................................................................95
Audience Abuse....................................................................................96
Topical Material ....................................................................................97
Puns ....................................................................................................98
Stepping Out Of Character ..................................................................100
Over Familiar ....................................................................................101
Offensive Material ..............................................................................102
Watching Other Magicians ..................................................................104
Conclusion ........................................................................................105
PART 3: AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ............................................106
CHAPTER 6: INVOLVING ASSISTANTS ....................................................107
Introduction ........................................................................................107
Why Audience Participation? ..............................................................107
Potential Embarrassment ......................................................................108
Potential versus Actual......................................................................108
Silly Things ....................................................................................110
Destruction Of Property ........................................................................111
Deliberate Error ..................................................................................113
Magician Error................................................................................113
Assistant Error ................................................................................115
Insult Humour......................................................................................115
Definition ........................................................................................115
Who Uses It? ..................................................................................116
Tips on Using ................................................................................117
Perils Of Audience Participation............................................................119
A Cautionary Tale............................................................................119
Case Against ..................................................................................121
Conclusion ........................................................................................122
CHAPTER 7: QUESTIONING ASSISTANTS ................................................123
Introduction ........................................................................................123
Instructions..........................................................................................123
General Questions ..............................................................................124
Individual Questions ............................................................................125
Whats Your Name? ............................................................................126
Remembering and Using Names ......................................................126
Extracting Humour ..........................................................................127
Where Are You From? ........................................................................129
What Do You Do For A Living? ............................................................131
Humorous Occupations ....................................................................131

10 CONTENTS

Generalising ..................................................................................132
Probing ..............................................................................................134
Standard Responses ............................................................................135
Closed Questions ................................................................................136
Unexpected Answers ..........................................................................137
Dealing With ..................................................................................138
Bailing Out ....................................................................................139
Bringing It Together: Smashed Watch ....................................................139
The Routine ....................................................................................140
Summary ........................................................................................144
Conclusion ........................................................................................145
CHAPTER 8: SELECTING ASSISTANTS ......................................................146
Introduction ........................................................................................146
Going Out To Assistants ......................................................................146
Assistants In Audience ........................................................................147
Means Of Getting Assistants From The Audience ....................................149
You Choose ....................................................................................149
Just Tell Them ..................................................................................150
Going out into the Audience ............................................................150
Grab and Run ................................................................................150
Making a Joke ..............................................................................150
Gradual Steps ................................................................................151
Using a Prop to Hook Them ..............................................................151
The Name ......................................................................................151
Pick and Mix ..................................................................................152
Outs ..............................................................................................153
Which Assistants To Choose ................................................................155
General Categories ........................................................................155
Narrowing Down ............................................................................155
Help with Selection ..........................................................................157
How Many Assistants ..........................................................................159
Just the One ....................................................................................159
Perfect Twosome ..............................................................................160
Threes a Crowd..............................................................................161
Conclusion ........................................................................................161
CHAPTER 9: TYPES OF ASSISTANT ..........................................................162
Introduction ........................................................................................162
Assistant As Prop ................................................................................162
Fear No More ................................................................................162

CONTENTS 11

Downsides ......................................................................................164
Assistant As Foil ..................................................................................164
Show to Date ..................................................................................166
No Previous Humiliation ..................................................................166
Give them Time to Find their Space ..................................................167
Smile a Lot......................................................................................168
Results ............................................................................................168
Assistant As Plant ................................................................................169
When to Use Plants ........................................................................169
Unsuspecting Plant ..........................................................................170
Humorous Plants ..............................................................................171
Assistant As Instant Stooge ..................................................................171
Verbal Cuing ..................................................................................172
Written Cuing ................................................................................173
Assistant As Magical Victim..................................................................175
Thanking Assistants..............................................................................176
Finish Of Smashed Watch ....................................................................176
Conclusion ........................................................................................179
PART 4: THE ACT........................................................................180
CHAPTER 10: MORE THAN THE SUM OF THE PARTS ................................181
Introduction ........................................................................................181
Opening ............................................................................................181
The Walk On ..................................................................................182
Opening Line ..................................................................................183
Subsequent Lines ............................................................................185
First Trick ............................................................................................185
My Own Experience ........................................................................186
Shock Openings ..............................................................................187
Structure Of The Act ............................................................................188
Traditional ......................................................................................188
Alternative ......................................................................................189
Other Options ................................................................................191
The Pice De Rsistance ......................................................................192
Between Tricks ....................................................................................193
Applause............................................................................................194
Closing ..............................................................................................195
Encores ..............................................................................................197
My Own Act ......................................................................................197
Conclusion ........................................................................................199

12 CONTENTS

CHAPTER 11: DEALING WITH THE UNEXPECTED......................................200

Introduction ........................................................................................200
Nerves ..............................................................................................200
Dying ................................................................................................201
Top Five Deaths ..............................................................................201
Apportioning Blame ........................................................................204
Taking Action ..................................................................................205
Complaints Against You ......................................................................206
Types ............................................................................................206
Generalised ....................................................................................207
Heckling ............................................................................................208
Aggressive Heckle when the Act is Going Badly ................................208
Aggressive Heckle when the Act is Going Well ..................................210
Mild Heckle when the Act is Going Badly ..........................................211
Mild Heckle when the Act is Going Well ............................................211
Anecdotes ......................................................................................214
Tricks Going Wrong ............................................................................214
Difficult Assistants ................................................................................215
Other Unexpected Happenings ............................................................217
Walking Out ..................................................................................217
Medical Problems ............................................................................217
Feeling Sick ....................................................................................217
Non-English-speaking Audiences ......................................................217
Failure to Borrow Objects ................................................................218
Major Interruptions to the Act............................................................218
Assistants with Disabilities ................................................................219
Conclusion ........................................................................................219
CHAPTER 12: KEEPING FRESH ................................................................220
Introduction ......................................................................................220
Working On The Act: Existing Tricks ......................................................221
Topicality ........................................................................................221
Other Changes................................................................................222
Interference ....................................................................................224
Over-Improvement............................................................................225
Working On The Act: New Tricks..........................................................226
Barriers To Change..............................................................................229
No Time ........................................................................................230
Big Bucks........................................................................................231
Lack of Incentive ..............................................................................232
Fear ..............................................................................................233
Conclusion ........................................................................................236
CONTENTS 13

PART 5: PREPARATION ..............................................................237

CHAPTER 13: BEFORE GOING ON STAGE ..............................................238
Introduction ........................................................................................238
Booking Information ............................................................................238
Time Of Arrival ..................................................................................240
Sound ................................................................................................240
Testing the Equipment ......................................................................241
Type of Microphone ........................................................................242
Mike Stand ....................................................................................243
Music ............................................................................................244
Lighting ..............................................................................................245
Staging ..............................................................................................246
Smoke Alarms ....................................................................................248
Being Introduced ................................................................................249
Introducer ......................................................................................249
Introduction Wording ......................................................................251
The M or the C Word? ................................................................253
Taking You Off ................................................................................254
Time Of Performing ............................................................................254
Length Of Performance ........................................................................256
Dress ................................................................................................257
Eating And Drinking ............................................................................258
Conclusion ........................................................................................259
CHAPTER 14: THE PROFESSIONAL STAND-UP ..........................................261
Introduction ......................................................................................261
Number One Priority ..........................................................................261
Breaking In The Act ............................................................................262
Venues ..........................................................................................263
Money ..........................................................................................265
A Caveat ..........................................................................................267
Promotional Material ..........................................................................268
Business Cards ................................................................................268
Website ..........................................................................................268
Brochure ........................................................................................269
Testimonials ....................................................................................269
Photographs....................................................................................269
Film Footage ..................................................................................270
Newspaper Coverage......................................................................270
Summary ........................................................................................270

14 CONTENTS

Agents ..............................................................................................270
Keep Plugging ................................................................................271
Seeing You ....................................................................................272
Managers ..........................................................................................272
Fees ..................................................................................................274
Commission ....................................................................................274
Reducing Fees ................................................................................275
Contracts ........................................................................................275
Stand-Up Venues And Audiences ..........................................................276
Corporate Functions ........................................................................276
Cruise Ships....................................................................................277
Comedy Clubs ................................................................................278
Holiday Venues ..............................................................................279
Private Functions..............................................................................279
Conclusion ........................................................................................280
FINAL THOUGHTS..................................................................................281

CONTENTS 15

16

FOREWORD by Noel Britten

Those who perform stand-up on a regular basis will know there are some fellow
performers who seem to jinx you. My particular nemesis is a comedian called Kevin
McCarthy; and Ian Keable always claims that Im his personal bte noire. Certainly,
whenever Ian and I worked together he seemed to have, one of those nights.
On these occasions I was either compering or preceding him on the bill Ians postshow analysis of the evening was that our styles were slightly similar and that I, by
establishing myself first, was effectively sabotaging his performance.The fact that he was
a magician, and I was a comedian with not a trick in sight, was continually overlooked.
In 2005, at The Magic Circle Centenary, Ian appeared to have devised a plan to
exact his revenge. He was co-organising a show devoted to great magicians of the
past his own area of expertise and he booked me in to represent Fred Culpitt
and to perform a couple of routines I had never done before. This time he would
be compering, and we would see, as he put it, how I liked having to follow him.
Its not for me to comment on the respective merits of our performances but suffice
to say that Ians anticipated gloating was somewhat muted.
I know there are many magicians who are self-delusional but I thought, given our
history, Ian was taking it to a new level when he asked me to write the foreword to
his book on how to be a stand-up. I didnt want to hurt his feelings so I agreed to at
least read it, and then later come up with an excuse why I couldnt complete the task.
Whenever we met Ian would pester me as to how I was getting along. Hints such
as,Im very busy at the moment; Im not sure if Im the right person to do this;
and,Im struggling to find the right angle to approach it from, were all studiously
ignored by Ian.
And then disaster struck: we both found ourselves booked on the same cruise
ship. I was going to be trapped with Ian for three days with him going on and on
about this foreword. It was after only one day of nagging that I cracked.
Look Ian, I said, Ill be honest with you. I think the advice in your book is
excellent, its a good, solid read and anybody aspiring to be a stand-up magician will
gain a huge amount from it. If the exact same words had been written by any of the
brilliant stand-ups on either side of the Atlantic who have contributed to its contents,
I would have no hesitation in giving a glowing foreword. But the problem is that
Ive never actually seen you successfully apply your own theories.
Fair enough, said Ian (he can be reasonable), I'll make a deal with you.
Come and see my show tomorrow night. If, after you have watched me, you dont
think I can put into practice what I preach, then I wont mention it again.
I didnt hesitate: Youve got a deal. Finally I had found a way to gracefully
get out of writing the foreword.
Or so I thought.

FOREWORD 17

18

FIRST THINGS FIRST

What good is sitting alone in your room...come to the cabaret. Fred Ebb
What Is Stand-Up?
Billy McComb in The Professional Touch gives a pretty succinct definition, which is as
good as summary as any: A show where you are working on a flat floor, walking
on pretty much the same level as the audience. They are sitting at tables and they
are drinking. They are not sitting in seats facing the stage, prepared to be amused.
Clearly stand-up can be performed in a theatrical setting with a traditional stage
and tiered seating. But you have to be prepared for your act to work in the least
favourable conditions and consider anything else as a bonus.
Im sure many readers have performed close-up magic and are therefore familiar
with the principal differences between close-up and stand-up: in particular the
reduced number of spectators, the more intimate performing conditions and the
smaller scale tricks. Its worth emphasising two other key differences.
The Magic Effect
A never to be forgotten magical occurrence took place some years ago when I
was doing David Williamsons Torn and Restored Transposition whilst working
close-up in a restaurant. At the climax, the torn pieces of a chosen card appear
to merge together in the spectators hands. On its completion the woman who
had experienced the magical restoration had genuine tears in her eyes.
She said: You can't believe how happy youve made me.
Nobody, but nobody, has expressed anything even approaching such heartfelt
words at the finish of one of my stand-up tricks; and I doubt if they ever will.
The impact of a piece of magic on an audience is always going to be greater in a
close-up setting than in stand-up.
Part of the reason is that people believe magic done under their noses is much
more difficult than magic done at a distance. Once they are a little removed from the
performer, they automatically assume they are too far away to detect the solution.
Their intrinsic interest level, which is extremely high when something is happening
right in front of their eyes, diminishes exponentially the further they are from where
the trick is taking place.
Another aspect of the reduced impact of magic for the stand-up is that close-up
magic is a far more personal and intimate experience. You could produce an identical
effect in stand-up (e.g. a torn card is restored in the hand of the assistant): but then
it becomes an encounter for many people rather than for an individual. He or she
instinctively knows this and will react accordingly.

FIRST THINGS FIRST 19

Dead Time
Take a situation common to both the close-up and the stand-up magician:
the selection of a playing card. Those watching a close-up performer appreciate how
the card is offered to be taken; something as simple as a neat pressure fan produces
an admiring response. Once it is removed, all the participants are keen they are not
excluded from checking its suit and value, whilst simultaneously making sure the
magician cant get a glimpse.
When the card is returned the spectators wonder how much choice is permitted
as to where it is replaced: can it go anywhere in the deck or is it restricted to the top?
Afterwards they want to know if the magician is going to allow someone to shuffle
the deck so the card is lost to their satisfaction. Put simply, this whole selection
procedure has intrinsic appeal.
In the majority of stand-up tricks the removal and retrieving of a card has little
interest to anyone. Most of the audience are too distant to detect if anything
untoward is going on, so why should it have any relevance to them? Even if the card
is shown to them, they might well be too far away to see it properly.
Furthermore, there is the probability that initially nobody is close enough to reach
forward and take a card. The magician has to walk into the audience to have one
chosen; as a result he may well go off-mike, so he cant be heard; and also into an
area where he cant be seen by some people. Rather than being a time of inherent
curiosity, the selection procedure is now potential dead time.
An overdose of dead time is probably the commonest trait displayed by an
inexperienced stand-up. As Rich Marotta says, in his excellent Stand-up Comedy &
Magic video: You cant have any dead time in the act; you have to keep it moving,
keep talking, tell a joke, do something. Those who dont realise this will find that
what kept an audiences attention gripped when they are performing close-up
becomes tedious in stand-up.
The Author
Like many I first became interested in magic through close-up. I diligently read
books on card tricks and became a little obsessed in becoming a sleight of
hand expert. Sadly my aspirations exceeded my talents but I gradually began to
better my magical skills and started doing the occasional paid close-up show. At this
period, in the 1980s, I was living and working in London, where the comedy clubs
were beginning to flourish. Having by this stage done a few stand-up spots at private
parties, I did my first open spot at a comedy club in South London. An open spot
is where you perform for free for five minutes hoping to get a paid twenty
minute booking.
I did enough to secure the booking and came back a few weeks later. The show
went well. In retrospect this was probably just beginners luck; or maybe the novelty

20 FIRST THINGS FIRST

for the audience of seeing a magician in amongst a succession of comedians.

Nevertheless it gave me a taste for comedy clubs and I threw myself into them
with gusto. At that period it was comparatively simple to get work providing you had
a half-decent act so I had plenty of opportunities to practise my performing abilities
and increase my material.
In 1990, at the age of 34, I turned full-time. Apart from comedy clubs I was doing
the occasional private party and Rotary-type function. In this same year I was offered
a summer season in Jersey in the Channel Islands. I spent six months, working twice
a night for seven days a week, in a mini-show with a comedian, a singer and a couple
of backing musicians. It was a great learning experience but I felt my style was more
suited to comedy clubs than this type of mainstream audience.
I therefore continued to concentrate on comedy clubs, doing this for several years
until I thought my act had the potential for corporate work. I managed to persuade
an agent to come and see me and obtained my first booking from that source.
Bizarrely I was paid in kind rather than cash: two first-class air fare tickets to
Singapore and five nights in a hotel.
In 1998 I gave up comedy clubs, primarily because I felt I was getting a little
old for them (in mindset rather than necessarily in actual age.) To begin with I
had insufficient corporate work to keep me completely solvent. I therefore did
one or two cruises and have ventured into areas such as social clubs and
holiday hotels. I continue to plough these other arenas from time to time in an
attempt to supplement what now represents the vast majority of my income the
corporate market.
And the reasons I still love stand-up today as much as when I first started? Here
are just a few:

The realisation it is indisputably you the audience like and applaud and not just
your tricks.
The recognition that through the laughs you are generating, you are as much an
entertainer as a magician.
The sense of achievement in holding, and retaining, the absorbed attention of a
large number of people on your own.
The satisfaction that all the time youve spent working on your persona,
developing your routines and coming up with your lines and bits of business has
finally paid off.

Some Definitions
In using the term stand-up, I am going to take a leaf out of the comedians book
and refer exclusively to talking or patter acts. Im well aware there are some
extremely successful magicians who perform silently to music: with manipulation,
illusions, comedy pantomime or indeed a combination of all three. Some things I

FIRST THINGS FIRST 21

write may have relevance for those who perform without speaking. I hope they do
but, if so, its fortuitous not intentional.
In writing this book I have had to make other decisions. The one I perhaps regret
most is out of laziness I have decided to refer to magicians at all times as he, rather
than varying the pronoun and using the occasional she. I apologise to any women
magicians, but, at present, the reality is that male stand-ups do far outnumber
female. And, as my sister-in-law pointed out, this will doubtless continue to be the
case with the type of chauvinistic attitude displayed by magicians like myself in
books like these!
I will always refer to the area where the stand-up is performing as the stage.
Often this stage will just be a hotel floor or someones front living room or a corner
of a bar. Sometimes it might be a platform and, occasionally, a true theatre stage.
Finally when I use the word assistant I mean somebody from the audience
who is assisting the magician, but who is not in any way a stooge, plant or
confederate. I am not referring to a professional assistant. As I am wholly writing
about solo acts, I trust there will be no confusion. I have opted against the phrase
volunteers as in practice spectators helping magicians are very rarely true
volunteers, they are more like conscripts.
The Way Forward
Only you can possibly know why you want to become a stand-up act but, whatever
your reasons, you do need to put your love of magic into perspective. The phrase
Im an entertainer, not a magician is one that particularly irks me, as I feel some
performers use it as an excuse for getting away with poor magic. But when it comes
to stand-up its true that amusement does have equal billing with amazement.
If your great desire is to blow away fellow magicians with your magical creativity
and skills, then stand-up is probably the wrong arena to attempt it. Stand-up is
definitely for the real world and rarely fits comfortably into the artificial environment
of the magic convention.
What I can promise you is that if you never want to be jaded by your magic, then
stand-up is for you. I have heard several close-up magicians inform me that they are
sometimes uninspired by their work: there are just insufficient challenges to keep
them motivated. To a certain extent, for someone who is good at it, close-up in most
working situations is relatively undemanding.
With stand-up it never becomes too easy. From trying to find better tricks, to
getting more laughs, to increasing the length and quality of your act, to developing
your character, to dealing with hecklers, to playing to bigger audiences, to keeping
your act fresh and up to date, you will be kept constantly busy.
I wanted to end this chapter on a really upbeat note so as to send you forward into
the remainder of this book with energy and enthusiasm. I thought about telling you

22 FIRST THINGS FIRST

of the moment when I first had people standing up at the back of the room because
they were so keen to see what was happening on stage; or when somebody told me
that they had tears pouring down their face because they were laughing so much;
or the occasion I was happy to interrupt my holiday and drive 600 miles just so I
could try out a new trick.
But maybe I should leave you to find your own memories. Welcome to the world
of stand-up.

FIRST THINGS FIRST 23