HAVE YOU HEARD THE NEWZ????

(February - March 2013)

POEMS BY KYLE ELDRIDGE

ME YOU US WHATEVER is this what you came to see? this is just me i dont know who that is are you you? are you i? am i you? too? too? too much i wear a mask of pride with rainbow sprinkles falling in my lap falling falling down in my lap on my bed wipe it off wipe it down and is this what you came to hear? look at me in disbelief sip your beer dip your deer in the ditch where i lie eating pot pie hospital wires intravenous tubes in my veins monitored by big brother worried my little sister im a wreck microscopic speck

THE INS AND OUTS OF THE FREE TRADE EMBARGO metric imperialism kilometers roll by miles rock on bygones be bygones centimeter centipeder drudgery cough medicine railroad gin bobby dill in the united states of america our southern kin do it again do it again bow to the bombs endless veit congs trade your guns and blow for our marijuana ounce for ounce millilitre litre cup water in your hand splash it in your face youre a disgrace youre a disgrace hand is a measurement which is different for each spikes impale those who try to preach

on the cross always floss avoid the sauce dont be the boss rolling moss light it on fire in the mire please the sire with your fire

R&R WITH GOD'S SON going fishing with jesus he brought a loaf of bread and some bait i brought a 6 pack and a death wish i sat on a thumb tack and saw a speckled fish he said whoa baby i got something i said no u dont youre a liar he said nonsense i live in the kingdom i said heaven is a bottle of rum he said change your ways i said maybe another daze he said i am god i said youre a fraud

MORAL DILEMMA talking to you is so awkward with the thought in my mind that i want her more i feel really guilty my heartstrings are being pulled in all directions i feel really guilty i know i belong to no one and im not trying to give the impression that im all yours but the fact remains i feel really guilty is guilt a condition of being human? does it have to be?

WHEN YOU LEAVE YOUR DOORS OPEN FLIES WILL ENTER YOUR HOME AND FEAST ON YOUR BREAD CRUMBS why do you attract such lonely losers who try to act cool when they obviously are not the mean, jealous types who show their true colours unwittingly the cowards who jump at the chance to put others down and stand proudly on piles of shit the 'provocative' who are only offensive to intelligence the people that you would like to spit on once you get to know them cant you see? im not like them!

THE JUNK CYCLE preparing codeine pills: dissolve in water chill in freezer strain thru a coffee filter drink the bitter liquid feel pleasurable pins and needles relax get strung out feel painful pins and needles writhe repeat do it again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again look at yourself in the mirror stop

TO A FORMLESS NAMELESS ENTITY I MET ON THE INTERNET i still want you to want me borderline obsession turned to resignation acceptance of fate you were very elusive always standing at the gate you were unsure with good reason i was happy go lucky free from sin so many had committed treason i was unaware of the pain you had in there i was playful you were sullen in the end we were both very stupid and still are

FOXTROT SO WHAT my favorite animal is the fox they are catlike dogs so light on their feet they trot along so happily it makes me so happy to see a fox trot insanely happy tears in my eyes happy they are so delicate they are so cunning yet seemingly free from malice the way we should be

DEM FUCKING FEELS ALWAYS GET THE BEST OF ME we had great conversations i enjoyed making fun of you it was okay because i thought u were perfect and i let you know every chance i could trying not to seem like a creep or a weirdo or a pervert or the endless list of things that i imagined were in your mind i was all of these things but not really wholeheartedly "i am vast, i contain multitudes," said Whitman and i tend to agree wholeheartedly i dont blame you for questioning i dont blame myself for trying i would ask you for a second chance but you didnt even give me one chance we both just burnt out had nothing to talk about we became cynical it seemed forced thats how most relationships end so the question is: am i surprised or did i see it coming? or as an alternative: is there a chance of reconciliation or am i just torturing myself? another: why dont i try to get some sleep?

ZOMBIES after a night of zombies i feel the same maybe a little better about myself the fact that i went and did something got drunk with some cool people ate some chicken poppers with hot sauce they were good sucked at playing the game but i asked questions and you told me the rules i sat there with the drools humdrum bottle of rum some sum pee cum i just woke up its 3am dont judge me on my poetry ability when im half asleep

THE BIG LEBOWSKI the dude abides someone pissed on his rug, it really tied the room together, so began a journey he met a rich parapeligic and a feminist painter who's works were described as "strongly vaginal" encountered some nihilism and europop also a vietnam vet, who found judiasm and a man named jesus, a pederast and donny, who died white russians abounded dubies were sparked the voice of sam elliot resounded the dude abides

LONELY LONELY LONELY the smoke billow the coffee steam billow opaque clouds uneasy stimulation nervous energy wet day eating bananas by the bushel pot put me off guard taught be hard hello lovely goodbye my dear what is that sound? waves goodbye

SPACED OUT junipers from jupiter gin blossoms red faced king with turquiose thing death opens it mouth swallowing me whole into the whirlpool hellish visions and heavenly bodies saturns rings neptunes kings mars wars earths whores mercurial thoughts whats whats the suns rays purple haze