Caroline had never noticed how terrifying Bonnie could be when she was working a spell, this one

in particular seemed incredibly gruelling, and Bonnie didn't look like herself, all the flames in the little candles had swollen to an abnormal size and as they did the temperature in the room became sweltering. Caroline held onto Damon's hand who squeezed every now and then as the pain surged through him but they weren't even at the worst part yet. Bonnie was muttering her spell that forced Tyler to turn and he was screaming over the sounds of her chanting, this was really creepy, since the only light in the room was coming from the dozens of candles spread across Damon's bedroom floor. The minute Tyler had changed Damon was the one who started screaming, there was yelping coming from the grey wolf that was Tyler but Damon's screams were by far the worst thing that Caroline had ever heard in her life. He was in agonizing pain, he had to be if he was clutching at Caroline the way he was. Caroline was so focused on Damon's contorting form that she hadn't even noticed that Bonnie had done something to Tyler as she moved over and laid her hands on Damon. He folded in ways that were completely unnatural until Caroline was forced to let go of him and move backwards. There was just no room for her on his huge bed while he was twisting that way. She felt like crying but she forced herself not to, instead she retreated to the space in the room that was occupied by Jeremy who was frowning. Jeremy never really frowned, he was always the happygo-lucky kid, the kid who made jokes just so he didn't have to think about the seriousness of a situation, Caroline knew because she did the same thing. But now the two of them were attached to what was going on in this room and there was no escaping it. Damon's back arched in a completely unnatural way and then he was lifted off the bed entirely, Bonnie's hands never left him and he was screaming as if her touch was burning him. At first the screams hadn't made sense but now he was beginning to form words and it scared Caroline more than anything. He was begging Bonnie to stop, begging for her to kill him and Caroline felt the tears come to her. She wasn't crying or sobbing but the tears were running freely down her cheeks as she put a hand to her mouth to stop herself from screaming herself. She didn't know what to do, she was torn between sparing Damon anymore pain or letting Bonnie finish. If this worked then it would be worth it, she forced herself to reconcile with that but she closed her eyes but then opened them immediately, closing her eyes left only the sound of Damon's screaming and that was somehow worse. She looked through the room instead and focused on Tyler who was still in his wolf form, he was cowering in a corner though and shaking and making that awful whining sound that dogs do. She wanted to go towards him but then there was the fear of being bitten herself. She hated this suddenly, unsure of why she'd been so determined to stay here, and now she was fastened to this place, forced to stick it out. She felt a sudden relief as Jeremy reached out and took her hand in his, he was still frowning and there was nothing the two of them could do but stand there in their corner and wait it out. So that's what they did for what seemed like hours before Damon's awful pleas just turned to silence and his eyes rolled into the back of his head. It was another long while though before he came back down onto the bed, Caroline knew it was over though because Tyler had changed back, she rushed over to him, just wanting to be close to him. He wasn't as shaken up as she thought he would be, he wasn't shaking or disoriented like the last time, he also didn't seem exhausted as she pulled his clothes over to where he was and pulled him into her arms. He didn't even bother with the hugs or talking he kissed her and pulled her into his lap

aggressively and Caroline welcomed it, feeling relieved to have some kind of contact again. But they were torn from their little haven at the sound of Jeremy's voice. "Christ." That didn't sound good at all and Caroline's heart sank at the words that she knew were coming. She had expected them ever since she'd seen Damon. There was just no way someone came back from that. "It didn't work." Bonnie was crying, leaning her head onto the side of the bed and holding onto Damon's hand. Caroline was surprised to see Bonnie so upset but she knew that her friend was probably exhausted and drained and way too determined to help Elena to think straight right now. Jeremy saw the same thing as he peeled her away and took her up in a fireman hold and carried her out of the room. Caroline moved over to Damon and felt the tears fall down her cheek again. She'd seen Damon asleep before, he'd slept in her bed and she was surprised how peaceful he looked now, the wound was still there on his arm, it didn't look like it had healed but his skin wasn't so weird anymore, it looked like marble stone with the delicate lines that were embedded in him. She couldn't comprehend that Damon could die, all the times they'd gotten threats and gotten into fights and battles even Damon had been the one to save everybody. Reluctant as he was to admit that he liked being the good guy, Damon had always been the rock everyone counted on. Caroline looked up from where she'd been staring at Damon's face and then reached for the towel that had been there. She wiped the remaining sweat off his brow and chest and then stood aside quietly as she waited for Elena to come up the steps.

Elena didn't know what she had expected when she walked into that room, she had thought she would go hysterical or crazy, she thought at least she would scream but instead there were just tears. She had been masking her sobs so Damon wouldn't hear her and for some reason she still felt as if he shouldn't hear her cry. His eyes were closed and his skin looked like intricately carved marble as he laid on the bed and Elena just felt tears streaming down her cheeks. She shuddered at how peaceful Damon looked, the softness of his sleeping face as he dreamt peacefully, it lingered there, as if he was just asleep. But the tinge of his skin and the harshness of the daylight streaming through the windows told her otherwise. And the grief struck her, the true extent of her loss as she thought of the sweet taste of his skin and the warmth of his arms around her. And the sound of his voice, the sound of her name on his lips would never be heard again and now she did cry, she didn't sob or scream but she let herself cry as she crawled into the bed with Damon and held onto him. There was nothing in this world that could mend the loss she felt right now, she had lost the person who was so much a part of her it hurt. She lost him, his impossibly blue eyes and that awful smirk, and the softness of his hands. Damn him and his heroic antics, trying to save her, everything he'd ever done was to save her. And now he was dead. She cried again and laid there unable to do anything else but hold onto him, hold onto the man that she loved. The only man who would ever truly be one half of her. She had lost the other half of herself, and now she felt completely and utterly lost.

Elena was in the bed with Damon for hours, first she cried and then the crying turned to soft little whimpers until finally she was just laying there. Eyes open, she didn't even blink and Caroline was starting to get worried. This wasn't right, Caroline had never seen Elena this broken and it broke her heart. Elena was frozen, and Caroline could only vaguely comprehend it, she couldn't imagine being so hurt you couldn't move. But this wasn't right, she was laying on Damon's chest as if she expected him to move, as if until he did she couldn't function and Caroline thought that might be entirely true. Caroline didn't know what to do, she'd never lost someone the way Elena had, she'd never felt this kind of loss and grief and she didn't know what to do or say to make things right. She didn't believe there was anything that would make this right. Make it make sense. She moved around the bed and knelt down on the other side of Damon so she could look Elena in the eye. She shouldn't have done that, Elena's dark eyes were lost in her grief and they looked empty. Elena always had these big beautiful soulful eyes that Caroline had always been slightly jealous of but now she just looked so damaged. "Elena I'm-" "Don't. Don't say you're sorry. Don't say it." "Elena, don't do this to yourself." Caroline placed her hand over Elena's on Damon's chest. "I can't- I can't move." "Elena, Damon loved you. He wouldn't want you to do this, you're clinging to his body but that's not him." "Caroline, I can't move." Tears came back to her. "I can't do anything, I can't bring him back. And I can't be without him. I don't know what to do, I don't know how this happened, and I don't know how to fix it. I can't fix myself, I don't know- I just-" "Oh Elena." Caroline reached out and took Elena's hand in both of hers. She didn't know what to say to her, she knew there was nothing to comfort Elena. "I got one day. I was really, really happy for one whole day. He was making love to me in this bed two nights ago. And now he's dead. And I- I can't move. So I'm not going to." "Okay." Caroline didn't know what else to say so instead she rocked back on her heels and sat there holding Elena's hand for as long as she needed to. Elena couldn't move from the place that she'd settled in, she couldn't cry or be hysterical or be angry at Damon or Bonnie or even Tyler right now. She just couldn't, she knew that everyone was waiting for her to do something. Her not moving was unsettling to everyone and even though she didn't want that she just couldn't bring herself to move. She'd lost any sense of purpose or drive and mostly it was just because she didn't know what to do. She just didn't know. Where was she supposed to go from here? Her love for Damon hadn't ended with his death and

that was what hurt so much, all she could ever imagine wanting was him. Just him. She didn't need anything else, and since the only thing she needed was gone, now she was stuck here in this place that was making everyone else uncomfortable and worried. She didn't know how to explain to Caroline the complete and utter malfunction that was occurring right now. How could she possibly understand? Elena didn't want her to understand. She understood how people died of broken hearts, it was like losing a limb, except it felt like she had lost her heart. Her core had disappeared with Damon and she had nothing left of herself to keep her running. And so she would just stay here, like she had said to Caroline, all she could do was lay here and hope for something to change. But right now all she wished for was that she could disappear, like Damon, maybe she could just fade away and be nothing. She felt like nothing, empty and hollow. Maybe she could just go away, if she stayed here long enough. Bonnie woke up next to Jeremy, she recognized the spicy smell of his cologne before she even opened her eyes and she stretched herself in his arms, feeling the soreness of her bones and the ache in her muscles and then she remembered the futility of her efforts. She remembered Elena and Damon and she remembered how Damon hadn't woken up and she sat up in the bed. Jeremy sat up with her and checked his watch before he settled his arms around her again. "How long have I been sleeping?" This part of her powers were completely frustrating, after a spell like this she would simply be knocked out and sleep for hours on end without even realizing and having any sense of time. Her body needed to recuperate but it was disheartening when she knew, she could feel that her friends needed her. "Just a couple of hours." She got up out of the bed not caring about the fact that she was still wearing the same outfit and that she probably desperately needed a shower and headed out the unfamiliar room into the hallways of the boarding house. When she came into the room all she saw was Elena lying over Damon's chest and Caroline on the other side of him kneeling at the edge of the bed and holding Elena's hand. Elena wasn't crying or sobbing, she seemed unnaturally still and Bonnie glanced over at Caroline who gave her a meaningful and tear-filled look. Bonnie crawled into the bed behind Elena and wrapped her arms around her best friend. She knew loss, she'd experienced it before and she knew the grief that Elena was feeling, though she knew that this was worse. She and Damon had this thing that was hard to explain unless you witnessed it. And now Damon was gone, that was difficult to digest even for Bonnie, Damon had always been. Well, Damon. There were no other words for his vibrancy, and the way that even when he was being completely impossible his presence made you feel safer. Bonnie had never been able to explain that, why Damon exuded such a sense of strength and power and yet he felt almost safe. Bonnie felt Elena shake and start to cry again and Bonnie held on a bit tighter, it was all she could do. She knew the pain, the sense that everything had been taken away. Just ripped away from under your feet and the person who was usually there to catch you was the one you had lost. Bonnie felt tears come to her at the memory of losing her grandmother, the sense that she was completely and utterly alone overcame her again and she moved her hand over Elena and

Caroline's. The three of them interlinked over the loss of Damon and that was all they could do. Is stay here until Elena was ready to try and pick up the pieces. It was only when it started getting dark again that the three girls started to talk again, Caroline sat there quietly and hoped that Elena would be alright to get up and move, maybe leave this room and get changed. They couldn't stay like this, even Caroline saw the dreadfulness in that the three girls were poured over Damon's body as if it was still him and Caroline didn't believe it was anymore though she was keeping it to herself. She couldn't begin to comprehend the sense of loss that Elena felt right now, and though Caroline had cared for Damon she had never loved him in the way that Elena did. "Why did he do this?" Elena finally said after they'd been chatting about random things for a few moments. The room was hot and had an orange glow to it because of the setting sun that was shining through the large windows. "What was he thinking?" "I don't think he was thinking Elena. He was trying to save me and Tyler, and save you." Caroline spoke softly, resting her chin on her arm on the edge of the bed. "He never thought things through. He was pretty stupid like that." Bonnie snickered and managed to get Elena to close her eyes and smile. "How could he do this? How could he leave us like this?" By us she meant her. Caroline knew that Elena felt left behind, felt alone and Caroline couldn't really blame her. Bonnie had Jeremy and Caroline had Tyler and though they were best friends nothing could ever compare to being loved by the person who moved you so deeply it changed the way you viewed the world. Elena started to cry again, really cry, her eyes pinched shut and she clung to her friends' hands as she sobbed. Caroline couldn't hide the tears that were falling down her cheeks and she heard Bonnie sniffling from behind Elena as the three girls stayed locked in each other's grief and the room went dark with the fall of the night. "You guys are such girls." Caroline's eyes flashed up to where Damon's face was and she thought for a good long moment that she'd imagined it but Damon was looking at all three of them with an amused smile playing across his face and his eyes more blue than ever and Caroline couldn't comprehend what had just happened. "Really all that weeping for little old me?" He grinned and Caroline noticed that his voice was raspy and he actually looked incredibly tired but he was smiling. Damon was smiling, and talking. Caroline flung herself at him, completely unaware of what she was doing and she felt Bonnie's arms around them too, she didn't think Damon would ever be a fan of group-hugs but this time he seemed to be making an exception as he laughed. He laughed. Caroline found herself marveling at every movement he made. He shouldn't be alive, he'd been dead. Like really, really dead. This was by far the strangest thing that she'd ever seen, and she was a vampire so the statement was meaningful.

Caroline suddenly realized that her presence was completely unnecessary at the moment since Elena looked completely paralyzed still, she looked empty and glazed over and Caroline imagined it would take some alone-time with Damon for her to fully grasp the fact that she hadn't lost him. Caroline grabbed Bonnie by the hand and pulled her off the bed and out the room, closing the door behind them and leaving the two of them in peace. She sighed in sudden relief and turned to look at Bonnie in the darkened hallway, she was still crying. "That really happened? You saw that right?" Bonnie giggled in between her sniffles and Caroline laughed with her as they moved through the darkened hallway of the boarding house and she couldn't help but smile. After all the tears and the crying and the worry over Elena everything seemed to have dropped and become light again. "Yeah I did." Caroline answered but then turned to Bonnie in all seriousness. "How the hell did that happen though." "The spell must take a few hours, or maybe he has to die before he can come back. I'm not sure. I'll look into it but right now I don't really care." She laughed again and wiped away the tears as Jeremy came out one of the rooms and she went towards him. Caroline smiled to herself as she bounded down the stairs to find Tyler. Caroline hadn't expected to be so relieved to see Tyler but she literally took a breath as if she'd never done that before and sank into his arms on the couch and nestled herself into his chest. "Did I hear that right? Is Damon okay?" He asked her, quietly speaking the words into her hair and Caroline lifted her eyes to look into his. Those big puppy eyes, she smiled and nodded and then held on to the fact that everything was going to be alright and she was safe right here. As long as she stayed here. She cried, finally, whimpers escaping from her throat for the first time all night and she covered her eyes for a second as Tyler moved them to sit up. "Hey, hey what happened?" "Damon's going to be fine." "Well that's good right?" Tyler chuckled and Caroline nodded leaning into his warm frame. She wrapped her arms around his neck and let him pull her into his lap but he leaned back a bit to look at her. She placed a hand on his cheek. "Don't ever get yourself killed." Caroline knew it sounded kind of stupid, and considering the fact that he was a werewolf and she was a vampire, it was a slightly ridiculous request to make but she needed to make it. She didn't ever want to think about what would happen if she lost him. She wasn't nearly as strong and put together as Elena was, and Elena had been completely and utterly broken. Caroline knew if it ever happened to her she would shatter, she wouldn't recuperate from it. She'd be worse off than Elena was. She didn't ever want to go through it. Tyler just chuckled and tilted her chin up to look at him more clearly.

"I'll do my best." He smiled and then kissed her. It was more than Caroline could have ever wished for. Elena was staring back at Damon as he said her name, she felt breathless, and frozen. Damon was looking at her, with his blue eyes dazzling her even in the darkness of the night. She didn't know how this was possible but she was afraid to move or say anything in case she was imagining it. She needed it to be real, wanted it with every fibre of her being. When he reached out to touch her it was almost too much to bare. His touch scorched her, burned through her as if it had broken through her and she could feel again. "Damon" His name came out in a broken whisper and she closed her eyes finally allowing herself to bask in the feeling of his hand on her skin, she leapt forward and held onto him allowing herself to sob but in between her sobs she kissed every inch of his skin that was available to her. She repeated his name over and over again and told him she loved him so many times it almost lost it's meaning Damon pulled away just long enough so he could kiss her. Sweetly and more softer than he'd ever kissed her before. It was the most chaste and sweetest thing he could have done and it invoked more tears from Elena. All she'd been doing all day was crying and she didn't care anymore. She was home. "I love you Elena." His voice was raspy and he looked just a little tired but he smiled at her. "You ever do that to me again, and I'll kill you myself." he chuckled and Elena cried over that too. Everything about him was so beautiful and breathtaking and so, so precious. Elena didn't want to waste a moment's breath on anything or anyone else. She let Damon push her back so he was lying on top of her, she couldn't believe how lovely it felt to have him on top of her. To feel the weight of him on her and the feeling of his breath on her skin, the way he smelled, the softness of his hair and skin. The feeling she got when he placed butterfly kisses as he trailed down her body. She forgot everything else and let herself linger here, let herself stay here with him. Those three words were said too often and couldn't possibly describe what she felt for Damon the devotion and the undying passion she had for him. If all she could do right, was be here with Damon, just be here, she would do it forever.