EXT. FRATERNITY HOUSE- MORNING The house sign reads Omega Delta Zeta. INT.

OMEGA DELTA ZETA- MORNING In the main room, liquids and cups cover the hardwood floor. 3 girls are passed out on various couches. A FRAT GUY guy is sleeping on the stairs. INT. ROOM #10- MORNING JESS(20),part native American and a natural beauty, wakes up in an unfamiliar room with the hangover from hell. As she slowly adjusts to the light, she realizes that she is not sure where she is. Posters of half naked women line the walls, cups and empty liquor bottles litter the floor. She sits up in bed and realizes she is not alone. A snoring FRAT GUY lays beside her, his naked behind peeking out from under the blankets. Oh God. JESS

She gently covers the frat guys bottom with the blanket and tries to get a better look at his face. He twitches slightly and a look of horror washes over her face as she realizes it is EVAN(21), an all-American quarterback type and the biggest douchebag in the entire Greek community. EVAN (mumbling) The clown... its... its staring... at me? He giggles and flops his arm into Jesss lap in his sleep. She tries to remove it but he just grabs on tighter. Shit! JESS

She wriggles her foot out from under the blanket and tries to pick up her pants with her feet for what feels like eternity. She is unsuccessful and decides to just make a run for it. Evan lets a giant fart rip in his sleep. Jess gags. Gross. JESS (CONTD)

2. She takes a breath, grabs her pants and bolts for the door, praying that no normal frat guy will be up this early on a Sunday morning. Evan twitches in his sleep as the door shuts. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA HALLWAY- MORNING Jess stumbles into the hallway, pants in hand, and promptly steps into a puddle of an unknown substance. She SHRIEKS and frantically wipes her foot on a beer soaked rag. As she puts on her pants, someone clears his throat. A scrawny pledge, DAVID (18), is standing in the hallway with a mop. JESS Shh, you didnt see me. She buttons her pants while backing away. She heads for the front door and opens it to a blinding bright morning. FADE TO WHITE. TITLE CARD: GREEK ROW FADE IN EXT. GREEK ROW- MORNING Jess does her walk of shame home, attempting to tame her messy hair and grungy appearance. The Greek Row mansions pan by. The only people awake are the gardeners. Jess stumbles, twisting her ankle. One of the gardeners CAT CALLS at Jess, who just flips him off. She reaches her own sorority house, Alpha Nu, the nicest house on the row. INT. ALPHA NU FOYER TO JESSS ROOM- MORNING She runs up the staircase and stumbles into the room she shares with her best friend/pledge sister LORI, who is awake eating a PopTart in bed. JESS Lor, help me. Im dying.

3. Jess crawls into bed with Lori. LORI What happened to you last night? One moment we were dancing and the next... POOF! You were gone. Oh my God you look like someone beat you with an ugly stick. Did you shack it somewhere?! You whore! JESS Someone did beat me with an ugly stick. His name is Jack Daniels. LORI Aw, had a little too much to drink last night honey? JESS Thats an understatement. I blacked out like a Freshman on her first day of school. Lost my pearls and my dignity in one go. LORI So whos the lucky guy that lassoed you into bed last night? Please tell me it was Jamie. Hes totally in love with you and that hookup is way past due. JESS Okay you need to calm down it is way too early for you to be this peppy, my head is killing me. And Jamie is NOT IN LOVE WITH ME FOR THE LAST TIME. And no. It wasnt him anyway. LORI Was it Tyler? Hes a babe. Jess SIGHS. JESS No. Unfortunately not. LORI Jimmy again? JESS I wish. Hes absolutely beautiful. Lori gives Jess a disgusted look,

4. LORI Please tell me it wasnt Salamander. JESS Oh GOD no, what kind of girl do you think I am?! Definitely not down to have his scaly lizard tongue in my mouth. LORI Well then I give up. Tell me! Jess hesitates, knowing Lori is going to blow a gasket when she finds out about Evan. JESS Dont judge me okay. LORI I wont I promise! JESS It was.. um.. Evan. LORI EVAN?! What? Why? Are you serious? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? JESS I honestly have no clue I dont remember a thing. Jess goes pale. FLASHBACK TO: INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA BAR- EVENING Jess and Evan doing jaegerbombs with Jamie and others around the crowded bar. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA DANCEFLOOR- EVENING Jess and Evan dance provocatively surrounded by a sea of people. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA HALLWAY Evan pins Jess up against the wall while they furiously make out.

5. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA UPSTAIRS The party moves upstairs. The whole room takes a shot in unison. Jess plays around on the stripper pole while a group of guys form around her and stare until Evan drags her off the pole, throwing her over his shoulder, walking toward his bedroom as Jess playfully protests. BACK TO: INT. JESSS ROOM- MORNING Jess shudders. JESS Oh sweet baby Jesus. I just remembered. Jaegerbombs, stripper poles. Im going to hell. Or at least to Standards. Lori shivers in disgust. LORI Evan is so skeevy. JESS I know, can we just forget it happened? I need to sleep. Jess gets up and crawls into her own bed. LORI Sure. I love you no matter who you hook up with. But uh, Jess? Yeah? JESS

LORI Dont you think you should maybe shower before you conk out? Not to be rude but you kinda smell like you slept in a dumpster. Jess scoffs and throws a pillow at Lori, JESS Oh come on. Im so tired. No way Im getting out of bed now. Jess snuggles deeper into her blankets. Lori gets out of bed and rips the covers away from her, grabbing her by the foot and pulling her out of bed.

6. LORI Come on stinky. Id rather not have the room we share smelling like a soup kitchen. Jess groans as Lori pushes her out of bed and into the bathroom. INT. JESSS BATHROOM Jess looks at herself in the mirror, inspecting her ragged appearance. A flash of pain and regret flickers in her eyes as she unravels her tangled hair from the messy bun resting atop her head. She sees a younger, more awkward version of herself staring back at her. She turns on the shower as steam fills the room and clouds her reflection. EXT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA BACKYARD- AFTERNOON JAMIE(21), the epitome of tall dark and handsome, is playing a game of snappa, a widely known drinking game involving a case of beer, two die and four pint glasses set on each corner of the table, with the fraternity president BARRY(22),a well groomed African American, ALEC(20), a white boy who grew up in the hood, and David, the scrawny looking pledge from the hallway. JAMIE Last night was a mess, bro. Some girl puked in my coffee pot and then passed out on my futon. ALEC Yeah there were girls passed out everywhere last night. I found one in my closet. BARRY Someone stole my favorite Eric Clapton record. ALEC What are you? An old white man? Why do you even own a record player? Barry throws the die into the air but misses his chance to score a point.

7. BARRY Hey, whats wrong with Clapton? Cream is probably one of the best bands that ever existed. And records have more texture and depth in their audio quality than digital mp3s. ALEC Im just saying, most of the black guys I knew in LA wouldnt be caught dead listening to those white boy bangers. You can get shot for that down there. But, I mean you are pretty much only black on the outside. Inside you are whiter than that albino kid in Sig Delt. Barry throws an empty beer can at Alecs head. BARRY Not cool man. I resent that! Its not my fault I grew up in a wealthy neighborhood and my dads a senator. Evan staggers out of the house with a beer in hand and walks over to the table. As David throws his shot, Evan intercepts the die and smacks it to the ground. EVAN Move, pledge. Evan chugs his beer and crushes it on Davids head. EVAN (CONTD) Get me another beer while youre up, buddy. David skulks away in pain as Evan takes his place at the table. JAMIE Why do you gotta be so mean to the pledges all the time, bro? I was rewarding him for mopping the entire left wing of the house. EVAN Hes not part of my pledge service. Not my pledge, not my problem. Evan grabs the die from the sand pit, takes his shot and gracefully sinks the die into the cup.

8. EVAN (CONTD) Haha, suck on that. Jamie rolls his eyes, drinks his beer and continues on with the game. JAMIE So howd your night end up Evan? EVAN Best night of my life from what I can remember. Pretty sure I banged that hot A Nu you are friends with. JAMIE Who? Sandra? EVAN Naw man, you know the one. That slam that lived on your floor freshman year. I forget her name. ...Jess? JAMIE

EVAN Yeah! That one! She was a freak man. JAMIE What. Are you serious? Jamies blood beings to boil. He clenches his fists, struggling to maintain his composure. EVAN Too bad she was gone when I woke up. Woulda loved to take her to pound town again this morning. Jamie cant help but let out a little exasperated snort. EVAN (CONTD) What bro, got some kinda problem? JAMIE Naw, Its just... she must have been pretty smashed last night to sleep with you. EVAN Fuck you bro, Im a grade A piece of prime rib. Do you see these biceps?

9. Evan flexes his arms at the guys. Jamie averts his gaze to the ground. EVAN (CONTD) Yeah, thats right you skinny sack of shit. Do you even lift, bro? JAMIE Fuck off, Evan. You can be such a cunt sometimes. A vein begins to pulse in Evans neck. He rushes over to Jamie and gets in his face. EVAN Do you wanna throw down bro?! I will snap your little twig arms in HALF! Jamie looks directly into Evans eyes before spitting at his feet and walking away. JAMIE Fuck you, bro. Fuck you. Jamie goes inside as Evan stands there attempting to control his rage. He violently throws an unopened beer at the doorway Jamie just passed through and sits back down. EVAN What a pussy. Evan realizes they are down a player and looks around for David. EVAN (CONTD) PLLLLEEEEDDDDGGGEEE! INT. JAMIES ROOM- AFTEROON Jamie enters his room fuming. He slams the door behind him and begins to pace. He punches his wall but only hurts himself in the process. FUCK! JAMIE

He sits down on his bed and massages his bruised, possibly broken knuckles.

10. INT. OUTSIDE JESS ROOM- 9 P.M. Jess is still passed out in her bed sleeping off her hangover. Jamie climbs onto the fence and hops onto the latticed panels outside her window, hoisting himself onto the sill. He pushes open her unlocked window and enters the room. It is clear hes done this many times before. INT. JESS ROOM- 9 P.M. He sits on the edge of the bed and tickles her feet in an attempt to wake her up. She nearly kicks him in the face before jerking awake and wiping the drool off of her face. Her hair is a mess. Go away. Hey. JESS JAMIE

JESS Gah, what time is it? Am late for class? JAMIE Nah. Its still Sunday. Did you really sleep all day? JESS I swear Im never drinking again. It feels like someones doing some major construction with a jackhammer inside my head. Jamie scoffs. JESS (CONTD) ..well at lease not until Wednesday. God, I made some really terrible decisions last night. Jamie looks uncomfortable. JAMIE Yeah, I uh, heard about your drunken sexcapades. JESS Wait seriously?

11. JAMIE Evan wouldnt shut up about it this afternoon. Hes pretty proud of himself. JESS He has such a big mouth! Im going to kill him. I honestly dont even know how I ended up with him. I usually avoid him like the plague, and you know me, I NEVER, well, hardly ever, shack it unprepared. I was so blacked out. Like on another level blacked out. I pretty much went on a solo mission to Mars, thats how bad it was. Jamie cant help but roll his eyes at her. JAMIE Yeah. You must have been... Jess can sense the anger behind his words. JESS What the fuck is wrong with you? JAMIE Nothing. Its just... Evan? Really? Their conversation is interrupted by a KNOCK on the door. JESS Oh shit! Hide! Jamie flings himself on the floor and attempts to crawl under the bed, but he doesnt exactly fit. Alpha Nus chapter president, ALYSSA, enters the room. ALYSSA Is there a boy in here? JESS What? No! No way. Of course not. Thats not allowed, duh. No boys upstairs obviously. Alyssa gives Jess a quizzical look, not really believing her. JESS (CONTD) I was uh, on the phone!

12. ALYSSA Oh, okay. Well anyway, I need to talk to you about last night, sweetie. Jess twirls her hair trying to be nonchalant about the whole thing even though shes actually freaking out inside. JESS Oh? Whats up? ALYSSA Well to be blunt, I heard you were kind of being a DAB. JESS Im sorry, what? ALYSSA A DAB, you know, Drunk Ass Bitch? JESS Oh, Im not sure what you mean. ALYSSA Well for one, I saw you stroll in at 7 a.m. this morning lookin a hot mess. And someone anonymously emailed me a picture of you on a stripper pole. Alyssa shows her the aforementioned picture, but it is blurry and hard to make out details. ALYSSA (CONTD) You know we have a strict no stripper pole policy. JESS That is definitely not me. I would never shame our house by going on a stripper pole! You know me better than that. Jamie unsuccessfully attempts to stifle a sneeze. ALYSSA What was that? JESS ...I just got a Facebook notification.

13. ALYSSA So where did you sleep last night then? JESS Oh you know, in Jamies room. I slipped in a puddle and twisted my ankle and couldnt walk home, see? Jess lifts up her ankle which is actually black and blue from her fall on her walk home. Hm. What? ALYSSA JESS

ALYSSA Well, Its just not the story I heard. JESS What? What did you hear? ALYSSA Someone told me that you were with Evan. Alyssa looks a little jealous. She has secretly been harboring a crush on him all year. JESS Of course not! I would never! Hes been with more girls than Genghis Khan. ALYSSA Frankly, Im not sure I believe you, especially after the whole Sig Delt fiasco last year. JESS Oh come on that was ONE TIME! You cant keep bringing it up like this! It was so long ago. ALYSSA Well, since all of the evidence for your... Indiscretions... (MORE)

14. ALYSSA (CONT'D) is circumstantial I wont send you to standards, but if I hear about you being involved in any more shady activities I WILL enforce the maximum penalties. Take care sweetie. Alyssa gives Jess a judgemental look before exiting the room. Jess flops back onto her pillows in relief as Jamie crawls out from his hiding spot. JAMIE Ive never heard about this Sig Delt fiasco. FLASHBACK TO: INT. SIGMA DELTA PHILANTHROPY- LAST YEAR Jess takes a shot with the albino and begins making out with him. After a moment, she promptly projectile vomits all over him and slips in a puddle of her own puke, taking him down with her. BACK TO: INT. JESS ROOM- 9 P.M. Jess looks a little green. JESS Id really rather not talk about it. Jamie chuckles and gets up to leave. JAMIE You never fail to amaze me Jess. Honestly though, Im a little disappointed... JESS Dude it was a mistake, do you really have to be an ass about it? You are my best friend, I dont know why you are being so mean. JAMIE Are you that thick? What? JESS

15. JAMIE I care about you, goober. I love you. Jess sort of flinches at the word love and changes the subject. JESS Sooo.. What is the theme for Wednesday? Jamie looks exasperated. JAMIE Its colonial bros and nava-hoes. I gotta go. Jamie heads toward the window to leave, giving Jess a sad look. JESS Wait Jamie, dont leave yet. JAMIE Love you Jess. EXT. JESS ROOM Jamie crawls out of the window to head back to his fraternity, but his foot gets tangled in a vine and he falls flat on his face. FUCK! JAMIE

He brushes himself off and continues on his way. Jess watches him as he goes from her window. EXT. CALIFORNIA UNIVERSITY- THE NEXT DAY Jess stops at a snack cart to get her morning coffee. She takes a seat out front and Sal, (22) flamboyantly gay hipster with attitude (and another of Jesss closest friends), walks by and sits down beside her. SAL Way to never come to class bitch. You know you are like 10 minutes late right?

16. JESS You know Im a straggler boo. How are you? SAL Girl, word on the grapevine is that you spent the night with the Evan almighty. Hun, you should probably get tested. I bet you that boys chlamydias got chlamydia. JESS How the fuck does everyone know about that?! SAL You know Ev. That little terd talks more shit than Gossip Girl. JESS Ugh I just wanna vomit all over again thinking about it. SAL Just learn to keep it in your pants honey! You dont need to keep fuckin around with these stupid frat guys. There are more guys lining up to date you than for free tickets to the Superbowl. Dont lower your standards for stupid dicknuggets like Evan. JESS I know. I just turn into an animal when Im that drunk. Im a straight up predator. Like a shark on the hunt, but you know, for sex, not fish. Sal laughs. Jess downs the rest of her coffee and stands up to leave. JESS (CONTD) We should get to class. Better late then never right? Sal stands up and puts his arm around Jess an playfully smacks her ass as they head to their lecture hall.

17. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA BASEMENT- THE NEXT NIGHT Evan is screaming at pledges while they furiously eat a vomitinducing concoction of Quakers oatmeal and Jack Daniesl. EVAN EAT, FAGGOTS! EAT!!!! David spoons a mouthful of the slop into his mouth but promptly starts to gag. EVAN(CONTD) DONT BE A BITCH PLEDGE! Each time you throw up, you get paddled. Its that simple nerds! The other brothers sit back in the wings watching the mayhem unfold. Some are laughing while others look a little uncomfortable with the whole process. TYLER(19), one of the younger guys that joined the year before, looks uncomfortably over at his pledge brother, SAM(19). TYLER (TO SAM) Dont you think this might be a little much, bro? SAM I know dude. We didnt have it nearly this bad. Maybe we should say something to Evan. The boys look over at Evan who now has a bottle of whiskey in one hand and a tube of Saran Wrap in the other. He alternates between pouring whiskey down his throat, wrapping groups of pledges together, and screaming his brains out. It looks like he is going to have an aneurysm. SAM (CONTD) Ah, maybe not. That dudes terrifying. He could literally murder us. TYLER Yeah, Im sure the pledges will be fine... right? Sam tries to look positive but fails. SAM Yeah dude, theyll be fine.

18. Evan finishes wrapping up the pledges, chugs the rest of the whiskey and conducts the active members out of the room. EVAN First ones finished get to go home, last ones done get to sleep down here! Evan shatters the whiskey bottle against the concrete and walks away. The pledges violently fight against the plastic wrap as the brothers walk upstairs. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA CHAPTER ROOM- MOMENTS LATER All the brothers of the fraternity sit around the room for their formal weekly meeting. Barry raps his gavel three times on the table at the head of the room. BARRY I call to order the Theta Nu chapter of Omega Delta Zeta. Let us repeat the sacred creed. The brothers stand and recite their ancient fraternity code. ALL IN UNISON I believe in the college Fraternity. I believe in Omega Delta Zeta and what we as brothers stand for. Truth, honor, diligence and the pursuit of a righteous and fulfilling life. I believe in Omega Delta Zeta. Brothers we shall be, for all eternity. The brothers take their seats and wait for the weeks announcements. BARRY Alright so this week is a pretty slow one for the most part, but we do have a mixer this Wednesday that our VP of Events will give you more information on. Brother, Jamie? Jamie stands up to give his announcement. JAMIE Sup bros. So as you all have heard we are having a mixer with Alpha Nu this Wednesday-

19. A roar of excitement echoes through the room. JAMIE (CONTD) -And after a lot of back and forth with Sandra, their social chair, weve decided on a Colonial Bros and Nava-hoes theme. A RANDOM BRO in the back stands up. RANDOM BRO Sounds lame! JAMIE Lame? I would hardly call having the hottest sorority girls on campus dressed in nothing but small pieces of animal fur and body paint lame. A few brothers whistle and holler in agreement. CUT TO: INT. ALPHA NU CHAPTER ROOM- EVENING The girls are also having a meeting to discuss the weeks events. SANDRA is at the front of the room discussing the mixer with the Omegas. SANDRA -So everyone better be ready by 9 p.m. SHARP on Wednesday looking as absolutely hot as possible. The Omegas first date party is coming up in just a few weeks and we cant let those greasy sluts from Sigma Epsilon Chi steal our men! Instead of clapping and shouting, the girls snap quietly and whisper excitedly to each other. CUT TO: INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA CHAPTER ROOM- CONTINUOUS Barry is again taking control of the meeting. BARRY Alright, is there any new business we need to discuss?

20. Evan, still drunk, stands up and exclaims, EVAN Lets give out the sorority slam of the week award! Which A Nu was the biggest shitshow at our party on Saturday? BARRY Evan, I dont think thats a really appropriate award to give out. Evan menacingly stares straight into JAMIES eyes, EVAN I vote we give it to Jess Stanger. The stripper pole wasnt the only pole shes been upside down on if ya catch my drift. He mimics ass slapping motions as the room erupts in laughter. Jamie is furious and turning bright red. Suddenly, the first group of pledges bust into the room covered in oatmeal slop and whiskey. Another group follows right behind trying to push their way into the room. EVAN (CONTD) Well look who made it out of the pledge dungeon. Gentlemen, lets give a nice big round of applause to these scrawny, good-for-nothing LOSERS that want to call themselves fraternity men! The boys once again clap as the last group of saran wrapped pledges straggles into the room. David is a part of this last group. Evan looks at them and laughs. EVAN (CONTD) And look at the faces of the stupid pledges that get to spend the night in the pledge dungeon! A few of the actives start to chant, ACTIVES PLEDGE DUNGEON, PLEDGE DUNGEON, PLEDGE DUNGEON! Evan begins to shove the losing pledges back down into the vomit filled hole. David looks terrified and tries to run, but to no avail.

21. Sam tries to get Evans attention as he pushes the pledges into the dungeon. HEY! SAM

Everyone stops, including Evan. SAM (CONTD) Hold on a second here. Dont you think you are being a little hard on them? Excuse me? Sam cowers a little. SAM I mean, dont you think you are being a little hard on them? I think this is getting out of hand. I dont know what your old schools chapter was like, but this isnt really how we do things here. These are our future brothers you are torturing here. They arent slaves, bro. Evan pushes chairs and people out of the way until his is directly in front of Sams face. He is towering over him. EVAN Are you challenging me, bro? SAM You know what? Yeah. I am. I think we should treat our future brothers with a little more respect. Now I think you should sit back down and shut the hell up. Sam pushes Evan away with one finger, and Evan swings his arm back ready to explode. BARRY ALRIGHT! ENOUGH! I will not have a fight break out in this meeting! Now both of you sit back down and shut the hell up. Pledges, go home. No dungeon for any of you tonight. Now gentlemen, lets get back to business. EVAN

22. The pledges rejoice. One of them, Dev(18), a surfer type with a cocky attitude stands at the front of the crowd of his peers and looks directly at Evan. DEV Hey Evan, why dont you snack on my dick instead of trying to fuck us in the ass? Dev turns around to cheers and high fives from his pledge brothers as they walk out of the door. Evan furiously tries push his way toward Dev but is restrained by a few of the brothers. Once the pledges are gone Evan sits back down, still fuming. Barry calls the room to order to finish up the meeting. BARRY Alright so since there seems to be some differences in opinion on the way in which the pledges are treated, I motion for a vote on the matter. Everyone! Heads down! The brothers lower their heads. BARRY (CONTD) All those in favor of continuing Brother Evans hazing tactics, raise your hands. A few of them raise their hands timidly, because they are equally terrified of Evan. BARRY (CONTD) Hands down. Now all those in favor of easing up on the pledges? The rest of the brothers raise their hands. Barry raps his gavel three times. The brothers raise theire heads. BARRY (CONTD) Alright it has been decided. Brother Sam will replace Brother Evan as Pledge Master from this day forward. I now call this meeting to a close. The brothers rejoice. Sam and Tyler high five in the background. EVAN This is BULLSHIT!

23. Evan storms out of the room angrily, slamming door behind him with such force that it knocks a nearby composite off of the wall. INT. ALPHA NU CHAPTER ROOM- EVENING The girls conclude their chapter meeting hand in hand reciting the ritual song. ALL IN UNISON Sisters forever, friendship deep and true. Under the cover over the sacred white and blue. We owe all our love to the mighty Alpha Nu. Many linger around to chat for a moment before heading up to their respective rooms. Jess and Lori go to the kitchen to grab snacks before bed. They grab an entire tray of their house moms homemade chocolate chip cookies and take them up to their room. INT. JESS ROOM- EVENING Jess and Lori giggle over their stolen cookies in bed. LORI So are you excited for Wednesday? Im sure Evan will be happy to see you. Lori playfully jabs Jess in the ribs. Jess smacks her in the shoulder. She is really starting to get annoying with the constant teasing. JESS Shut the hell up Lor, that will NEVER happen again. I am going to deny the fact that I hooked up with him until the day I die. So heres the deal. So hypothetically, if I were to get really, really drunk on Wednesday, and hypothetically, if I were to start talking to Evan, you HAVE to get me out of there by any means possible. Okay? LORI Alright sweetie. Ive got your back, you know that. I just feel bad for Jamie.

24. JESS He seemed really upset when he came over the other night. I feel awful. You know I love him too, Its just.. Weve been friends for so long I just cant really see him as anything more than that. And then theres always the Lani problem. Lani is Jamies ex girlfriend and one of Jess and Loris pledge sisters. Shes notoriously territorial about Jamie and their relationship recently ended very badly. LORI True, Lani can be kind of a bitch. Just be careful Jess. You and Jamie have something special. Maybe you cant see it yet but hopefully one day you will realize. Im sure Lani will get over it. Jess seems troubled about her relationship with Jamie. Everything seems to be changing and becoming more complicated. JESS I dont know Lor, Its all too complicated. Lets just sit back and watch some TV yeah? The girls sit back in bed and click on the newest episode of The Bachelor as they snuggle together under the blankets. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA- MIXER NIGHT Pledges run around doing last minutes preparations for the mixer. They stock the bar, sweep the floors, and hang decorations. The active brothers slowly file down and wait for the girls to arrive. They look ridiculous in their homemade colonial garb. JAMIE (to Barry) Maybe this theme wasnt the best idea. BARRY I dont know I kinda like it, Im pumped.

25. Barry is dressed to the nines in his colonial costume. It almost looks authentic. He does an awkward jig in his costume, catching the eye of Alec. ALEC ... You know youd be a slave in colonial times right? JAMIE Shut the hell up Alec. Why do you always have to be an ass to Barry? Hes our president. Realistically, he pretty much owns YOU. ALEC Oh come on, hes Carlton Banks reincarnated. I cant hold the jokes in! Barry wanders off to talk to other brothers, still doing Carlton-esque dance moves. INT. ALPHA NU BATHROOM- MIXER NIGHT Dozens of girls crowd around the bathroom mirror doing their makeup and hair. Jess and Lori are in the hallway just outside the bathroom with others getting ready to apply body paint to their barely-clothed figures. LORI Hurry put a handprint on my boob before you drip everywhere! Jess dips her hand into a tub of white paint and pressed her hand against Loris breast. JESS Hold still or Im gonna mess it up! LORI Im sorry Im too excited! Its the first mixer of the semester. Jess removes her hand, leaving a slightly smudged handprint. Lori looks in the mirror, LORI (CONTD) Its totally perf. JESS Okay Do me! Do me!

26. Lori reciprocates the handprint and blows on it to make it dry faster. JESS (CONTD) Okay we look adorbs. Now lets go take pictures in our room. Taking pictures is code for taking shots, which is forbidden in the sorority house. INT. JESS ROOM- MIXER NIGHT Jess, Lori, Sandra and Lani are all huddled around a bottle of tequila taking shots. Lani makes a disgusted face as she downs her shot. LANI Jesus fuck what kind of shitty tequila is this?! Did some sweaty Mexican drink it then throw it up and put it back in the bottle? I mean seriously! Couldnt you spring for some Patron at least?! Lori playfully grabs the bottle from Lani. LORI Sorry you know Im saving up for spring break in Cabo! It still gets you drunk so stop complaining you whore. Lori takes a big swig from the bottle and gags a little. LORI (CONTD) Okay it is pretty bad. Im sorry sweetie. Sandra walks over and grabs the bottle from Lori SANDRA Fuck it I just want to get hammered! She downs a mouthful of the tequila without even flinching. SANDRA (CONTD) See? Not that bad. JESS Sandra you are a madwoman.

27. SANDRA Im just a girl on a mission. A mission for a good fingerbanging! The girls erupt in laughter and pass the bottle around some more. Lani goes over to the mirror and inspects her body. Shes flawless, but insecure. LANI Ugh, Jamies is never gonna take me back if I dont lose this stupid fat pouch from my stomach. I need to lay of the cheese puffs. Jess shifts uncomfortably at the sound of Jamies name but does her best to hid it. LORI Oh shut the hell up Lani. You are the closest to a Barbie doll any of us could ever hope to be. Plus Jamies a turd. You dont need him. Youve got us! The girls all gather around each other for a big group hug. SANDRA Sisters forever right? JESS Yeah. Sisters forever... They all take their last shots before heading out for the night. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA- MIXER NIGHT Evan is already wasted. He walks around the room yelling at various pledges. He spots David filling up a cup of jungle juice and makes his way over, snatching the cup from his hand and chugging it in his face. EVAN Pledge! Im kinda hungry, be a doll and run down to the burger joint and get me some fries and a milkshake would ya? Yes siDAVID

28. EVAN What the fuck did I say pledge? You are NOT allowed to fucking speak! David timidly holds out his hand for money. EVAN reaches for his wallet and grabs a 10, but before handing it to him decides to wipe his butt with it. He smacks it into his hand and walks away. Jamie notices Evans disgusting behavior and walks over to David. JAMIE Hey, man. Look, Evans a dick. He treats you like shit and honestly, if you wanna get revenge youve got the rest of the brothers behind you. Its about time Ev got what he deserved. David looks at Jamie timidly, DAVID Thanks man. I really appreciate it, Evan looks over and notices David talking to Jamie EVAN WHAT THE FUCK DID I SAY PLEDGE! Shut the fuck up and get a move on! Im fucking starving! David begins to head toward the door when two of his pledge brothers, CAM and TY, come up to him and follow him out to the burger place a few blocks away. EXT. GREEK ROW- NIGHT The pledges walk down the street in the cold shivering. CAM Dude Evan is such a douche. I could literally murder him and feel no remorse. TY Oh come on. You dont have a big enough sack to even talk to him, let alone commit murder. CAM Dude, once Im an active Im gonna fuck that dude up. I dont know what his deal is! (MORE)

29. CAM (CONT'D) Hes like a Vietnam vet trapped in a college guys body. I swear, he probably has PTSD from whatever happened to him at the chapter at his old school.

Ty playfully knocks into David. David says nothing. TY Well at least we dont got it as bad as this one am I right? Cam laughs, CAM Yeah Id hate to be Evans personal slave. How do you even handle it? I woulda lost my shit by now. Why dont you talk? Did he.... Uh, did he like... Rape you or something? TY DUDE! Come on! Evan may be psychotic but bro rape?! Thats highly unlikely. CAM Yahh, your probably right bro. David just laughs and shrugs off the comments, letting them stir in his brain for a little while. They pass by a 7-11. David stops in his tracks. DAVID (whispering) Wait. The other boys stop. CAM Dude. Did he just talk? DAVID YEAH BRO IM NOT MUTE! TY Dude you have hardly said a word since we met you! How were we supposed to know?

30. DAVID Evan made me his silent pledge bitch! He pretty much beats me if I talk at all. But bros, Ive got a plan. Ive got a plan to screw Evan over and make sure he doesnt mess with us anymore. Im tired of his fucking bullshit. Jamie and the others will back us up. CAM Yeah? Whats your plan? Hold up. DAVID

David heads toward a nearby 7-11. INT. 7-11- MIXER NIGHT David ducks into the 7-11. He heads to the medicine aisle and grabs a pack of chewable strawberry laxatives. He heads to checkout and pulls the poo stained 10 dollar bill out of his pocket and puts it on the counter. The clerk looks quizzically at the money. CLERK Is that shit on that bill? DAVID Nah dude, gross. A chocolate bar melted in my pocket. The CLERK looks at him skeptically, but takes his money. As he picks it up he gets a huge whiff of human feces from the money. CLERK DUDE WHAT THE FUCK THAT TOTALLY IS SHIT! The Clerk angrily lunges at David who then bolts out of the store. EXT. 7-11- MIXER NIGHT David runs towards his pledge brothers with the fat Clerk in pursuit.

31. DAVID RUN GUYS! RUUNN! The boys take off in a mad dash away from the clerk who eventually runs out of breath and ends his pursuit. EXT. BURGER PALACE- MIXER NIGHT The boys are bent over panting out of breath. CAM Dude, what the fuck was that about? David proudly displays his purchase to his pledge brothers. DAVID Hes never gonna see it coming. David laughs manically and the other boys join in. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA- MIXER NIGHT David and his brothers walk in with Evans burger and laxative spiked shake in hand. They give each other a knowing glance before scattering. David walks up to Evan and timidly hands him his food. Evan snatches the food from him and furiously sucks down his shake. He looks down at David. EVAN What the hell are you looking at? Go clean the bathroom in the west wing before the girls get here! David skulks away with a devilish grin on his face. EXT. ALPHA NU- MIXER NIGHT The girls emerge from the house looking like Victorias Secret models. They head toward the Omega house in their skimpy outfits and high heels. Jess and Lori hold each others hands at the front of the pack, laughing and stumbling slightly. The front door opens as the approach the house.

32. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA- MIXER NIGHT The girls walk in, in slow motion, and head to the bar. The boys just stare in awe. Pledges stand nervously behind the bar. Jess and Lori grab shot glasses from them and clink glasses, bringing everything back to normal speed. The party has begun. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA- MIXER NIGHT- 45 MINUTES LATER Montage of girls and guys mingling with one another, participating in various drinking games, making out, and dancing. Jess and Lori are flirting with a pair of very attractive seniors, drinking mixed drinks. Jamie spots them and makes his way over. LORI Ah Jamie! Lookin good gorgeous! How are you! Where have you been hiding I miss you! JAMIE Oh yeah Ive busy. Hey Jess. JESS Heyyy.. Jamie! Jess is pretty drunk and gives Jamie a big, sloppy hug. JAMIE Whoah there darling, I can smell the tequila on your breath. Jess giggles. JESS Oh hussh Ive only had like... 6 shots? 7. Maybe 8. No it was definitely 8. Yeah. JAMIE Youve always been a go hard or go home type of girl. JESS You know me so well! I think you need another drink!

33. JAMIE

Oh no I-

Jess puts her fingers to his lips and shushes him. JESS Ill be right back! Jess skips away to get more drinks. JAMIE (to Lori) Damn, shes on one tonight isnt she? LORI Yep shes a whole nother level tonight. I think its due to postEvan hookup shame. JAMIE Oh, right. Forgot about that for a second. Jamie rolls his eyes. LORI Dont let it get to you J. I know you are totes in love with her. JAMIE I am no such thing. I am totes not in love with her. LORI You wanna know a secret? Im pretty sure shes in love with you too. Lori playfully prods Jamies shoulder, LORI (CONTD) If you werent such a pussy youd go ahead and make a move on her already! JAMIE I dont think Lani would approve. LORI Oh fuck that bitch she needs to get over herself and over you. Just dont worry about it for now. Just follow your heart!

34. Lori laughs at her own cheesy advice. Jamie mulls this information over in his head as Jess returns to the table with a bottle of tequila in hand. JESS Bottoms up baby! She shoves the bottle into Jamies hands. He is hesitant. Drink up! JESS (CONTD)

Jamie decides to let go of his inhibitions and takes a very large swig from the bottle. Cheers. JAMIE

He takes another swig and Jess cheers, hugging him. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA HALLWAY- LATER Evan is attempting to chat up a young nervous Freshman, ALYSE. EVAN ...Yeah I was just too frat at my last school so I decided to transfer here to mellow out. Mhm. ALYSE

EVAN Here let me get you another drink. ALYSE No no Im fine thaEVAN Nonsense. I like my women like I like my weekends. Drunk and sloppy. He winks at her and smacks her butt on the way to the bar. He stops midway there, feeling the bubbling in his gut. He shakes it off and grabs two shots, takes them, then grabs two more.

35. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA DANCE FLOOR- MIXER NIGHT Jess, Lori, Jamie, and Loris hot senior are dancing like maniacs to the earsplitting music coming through the speakers. Jamie is sweating and getting tired, but he is really turned on by Jess grinding on him. JAMIE (shouting) HEY JESS, lets go up to my room its way too hot in HERE. JESS (shouting) WHAT? JAMIE (shouting) LETS GO TAKE A BREAK IN MY ROOM. JESS (shouting) ALRIGHT! Lead the way sir pilgrim! Jamie grabs JESSs hand and leads her upstairs to his room. INT. JAMIES ROOM- CONTINUOUS Jess flops down on the bed exhausted and laughing. Jamie takes of his sticky shirt. JESS Holy shit this is so much fun. JAMIE I know dude! I havent been this drunk since... I dont even know. Jamie flops down on the bed next to Jess. Jess looks at him sincerely. JESS You know, this is nice. Its been a while since I got wasted with my partner in crime. I miss you. JAMIE Yeah. It feels like forever since those days in the dorms together. I miss you too Jess. They look into each others eyes smiling. Then, Jamie kisses her.

36. INT. OMEGA DELTA ZETA HALLWAY- SIMULTANEOUS EVAN returns, two drinks in hand. EVAN Alright, bottoms up baEvan comes to realize that his cute freshman Alyse is in the corner flirting with David. EVAN (CONTD) Oh HELL no! Evan storms over. EVAN (CONTD) PLEDGE! What on gods green earth do you think you are doing? Get the hell away from my future slam! Evans insides begin to rumble again, much more furiously this time. DAVID Is something wrong there Evan? EVAN I told you! You arent allowed to speak! Now get the hell out of here before IEvans stomach gurgles loudly, causing heads to turn. Before IEVAN (CONTD)

Evan cant help but let out a huge liquidy shart. EVAN (CONTD) Oh god. MOVE! Evan pushes David and Alyse aside and starts to run for the bathroom, but Cam and Ty block his way. EVAN (CONTD) Get the hell out of my way you filthy pledges! The pledges dont budge. They just smirk. Evan becomes desperate. Sam and Tyler join the barricade. EVAN (CONTD) Guys, come on. Were all brothers right? (MORE)

37. EVAN (CONTD) Come on, just let me through. Ill.. Ill.. Oh god NOOOOOOOOO. Evan can no longer hold it in and releases a violent stream of liquid feces all over himself and crumples to the floor in shame. Girls begin shrieking and the guys shout in disgust. ALYSE. Oh god Im gonna vom. Alyse rushes to the nearest trash can and begins to throw up. David approaches Evan no longer afraid. DAVID See, Evan, things are gonna change around here from now on. We pledges are tired of your shit. Literally AND figuratively. So have fun cleaning this up yourself. EVAN (crying) You are going to pay for this pledge! I swear youll pay! David laughs. DAVID And my name is David, not pledge. David turns his back to Evan, grabs Alyse and heads for the stairs with his new conquest. DAVID (CONTD) Come on darling, Ive got an extra toothbrush with your name on it at my dorm. ALYSE You are too sweet. She puts her arm around his waist as they walk away together. The whole party erupts in cheers. Evan crawls into the bathroom crying in pain. CAM ALRIGHT EVERYONE! We are now officially moving the party upstairs!

38. The party again starts to cheer and begins the migration upstairs. INT. JAMIES ROOM- MIXER NIGHT Jess shoots up, confused, and pushes Jamie away. JESS Wait. Jamie. We cant do this. JAMIE But I- I thought youJESS Its just, I dont know. Im so confused. I just... Fuck it. Jess grabs Jamie and continues to kiss him. Things get even more heated between them as clothes begin to fly and Jesss body paint begins to smudge. Suddenly, the door swings open to reveal Jamies ex, Lani, standing in the doorway. LANI What the fuck is this?! Jess frantically scrambles to grab her clothes and Lani throws a fit. LANI (CONTD) What the hell are you doing you stupid slut?! Get the hell off of my man! Lani waitJESS

LANI I do not give a flying fuck what you have to say to me you filthy bitch! Get the FUCK out of here before I make you regret it. Jess grabs her shoes and stumbles to the door. Lani pushes her out of the room and slams the door in her face. INT. HALLWAY- MIXER NIGHT Jess walks down the hallway with tears in her eyes just as the party begins to migrate to the upstairs room. She run into Lori who can see that she is upset.

39. LORI Darling whats going on? What happened. Jess chokes back tears, JESS I just- I wanna get out of here okay? Can we please just go? Lani, she.. She saw us. Me and Jamie. I just wanna leave okay. LORI Of course sweetie. Lets go. Well talk when we get back alright? Dont worry, everything will be okay. I love you! Lori intertwines her arm with Jess as they walk out of the party. INT. BATHROOM- MIXER NIGHT Evan sits on the toilet crying to himself. EVAN Theyll pay. Those goddamn assholes will pay. He doubles over in pain as the laxatives work their magic. EXT. GREEK ROW- MIXER NIGHT David and Alyse walk to the dorms together laughing about Evans take down hand in hand. INT. JAMIES ROOM- MIXER NIGHT Jamie sits on his bed, devastated, after being slapped in the face by his jealous ex girlfriend. LANI Screw you Jamie. I cant believe you would do this to me! Im fucking done with your bullshit and you can let your little whore Jess know that shes fucking dead. You hear me?! DEAD! Lani jerks open the door just as the party moves into the room, disappearing into the crowd.

40. Jamie runs his fingers through his hair as he sits on his bed, watching the world go on before him.

THE END.