Miss America 2013 Seena: Contestant 1 and judge 1- Assertive Matthew: Contestant 2 and judge 2- You-message Charlie: Contestant

3 and judge 3- I-message Darren: Asian parent of contestant 1 and judge 4- Aggressive Mara: Host- Non-verbal communication

Host- And were back ladies and gentlemen with the 2013 Miss America beauty pageant. We have our contestants (points to door) Jeffy! Miley Cyrus! And Brad! (Contestants 1, 2, and 3 walk through the door) Ladies, tell us a little about yourselves. Contestant 1- My name is Jeffy; and Im the hottest girl in the world, in case if you were too ignorant to notice. I mean, have a look at these sassy hips. Man, Im stone cold; all of you ugly females are about to humiliate yourselves. Jeffy here is going to smoke the competition. Contestant 2- Why dont you ease up on the attitude. How obnoxious of you for thinking youre prettier than me. Just, look at what youre wearing. Seriously, is that fishnet? You can bet that youre not going to get anywhere from this competition. Contestant 3- Excuse me ladies, but I dont think so. Im winning this contest because I have a reputation to support me. Needless to say, Im already the winner, cause I was prom queen for 10 years before I dropped out of high school. I am going to take the Miss America title. Asian Parent- Aigaaaaaaa! HONEY, YOU FORGOT YOUR JACKET! (Walks on stage and gives jacket to contestant 2) Contestant 2- No mom youre embarrassing me! (throws jacket on the ground) Asian Parent- How dare you disrespect du culture! (fake slaps contestant 2, then walks away) Host- All right, lets get back on track here. We will now begin the interview questionnaire. Host to contestant 2- Madame Miley, what are your opinions on world hunger? Contestant 2- Good question, wellyou seeI think that refrigerators are really good, foryou knowkeeping food cold. Host- A very sophisticated answer from Miley Cyrus. Now onto Jeffy. Sir, what are your opinions on the crisis in Syria? Contestant 1- Excuse me? Im a maam. Thanks for asking though, I do think that my confidence and overall appearance are CERTAINLY going to put me at the top of this Beauty Pageant, if thats what you meant.

Host- No, but thank you for that; now onto Brad. What efforts would you be willing to put forth to help solve the problem of math illiteracy? Contestant 3-In my personal opinion, I think that this is a serious issue in third-world countries. I think that I might be willing to put forth some of my personal fortune to help donate calculators to children in need. Host- Thank You! Some wonderful answers by some gorgeous ladies. Now for the moment weve all waited for. Expose yourself, ladies! (Contestant 1 walks in and walks out) (Contestant 2 walks in and walks out) (Contestant 3 walks in and walks out) Host- Wow! What stunning human beings! Now its time for the deliberation. (Contestants 1, 2, 3, and Parent all change and walk to the front, forming a half-circle opening to the audience) Host- Judges, what are your opinions of tonights contestants? Judge 2- Dont you guys think that Mirey Cylus was a clear winner? Judge 3- I dont think so, I think you are completely wrong. I think that Brad should take the title. Judge 1- Sir, are you out of your right mind?! No, youre all wrong, so just shut your stinkin mouths. Seriously, Jeffy had the best moves and the best body. Other than that, nobody else here is worthy of anything. Judge 4- (without Asian accent) NO, NO, NO! (Repetitively slam fist on desk Very Violently!!) I agree with judge 2 over here; (points to judge 2). Brad should win. How stupid of you to think otherwise! [Slam Fist! (grrrrrr)]. Judge 2- Thank you. You are a good man. Certainly you can also see Mirey Cyluss potential. You know, she even has a great singing voice! Judge 1-(Somewhat sarcastically) You know, I must agree with this ninny-hammer. I mean, what a handsome, monumental portrayal of her maturity at the 2013 VMAs. That, ladies and gentlemen, thats rich. Judge 3- Lionize Miley Cyrus all you want, but I will continue to agree with me, myself, and I. Brad deserves this title, and I refuse to shift views. Judge 2- Are you kidding? Judge 4- NO. (slams fist) What are you, stupid? He has a point!

Host- Alright Judges, it appears that were running low on time, and America is waiting for the final decision. Well have leave this to the audience. Miley Cyrus has been disqualified due to widespread concerns for our nations future. Who here wants Brad to win (counts), Who here wants Jeffy to win (counts). Host- It appears that the winner is[winner]. (Very Bluntly) Congratulations. Here is your prize (hands toothbrush to winner).