5 Advantages of Having a

Hidden Disability That We

Forget About
by Lisa Copen

So often we only see the drawbacks to living

with a chronic illness that is not visible. But as
my own illness, rheumatoid arthritis,
progresses, I can see the benefits of being able
to hide your illness or choose to reveal it
based on the circumstances or your own
desires.

I rarely see the changes in my own body, such as my hands or feet deformities, unless I
see a reflection in the mirror, for example when I am trying to clothes in a dressing room
at a store. I've heard children ask their mom, "What is wrong with her feet?" as they've
looked under the divider from a nearby dressing room. I can't help but wonder how
people don't realize I have some sort of illness when they see my hands and fingers.

In the television show about the documentary of Farrah Fawcett's battle with cancer her
son said something like, "I know she will be fine. She just looks so good." Those of us
with invisible illness are tempted to throw up our hands in frustration at these sort of
comments. They sound like the familiar "You don't look sick" observations people tell us.
Yet, it was true. Some days she did look like the beautiful bombshell most of us
remember. But other days she looked like someone struggling to survive cancer, in the
fight of her life.

So it is no secret that it can be frustrating to appear to be healthy when you are feeling
awful. And yet, let's be honest. Do you really want to look like how you feel? There are
some benefits to having an illness that can't be seen by everyone. Let's look at a few of
those perks.

[1] You get to choose who to reveal your illness to and who not to. Some people you may
immediately confide in; others you may wait and see if they feel "safe." Some people you
may never tell about your illness.

[2] You don't receive advice about how to treat your illness. Since it's invisible you don't
have to listen to people sharing about the experience of their aunt's mother's neighbor
who had that same disease and how she cured it herself. If you make the choice to tell
someone, especially a stranger, than you are opening yourself up to a can of worms, but
it's still your choice.

[3] You can go to work and do your job without people having preconceived notions
about what you can do or cannot do because of your illness. You get the option to reveal
your condition in your own time and to the people you want. If you are doing your job
with success, it may be something you keep personal for years.

[4] You aren't on the receiving end of pity or sympathy stares. People who use assistive
devices like a cane or wheelchair, or who have a visible illness, must learn to not care
what other people (both friends and strangers) may think when they see them shaking, or
struggling to walk.

[5] You can fake it! If you want to just forget your illness and go out for a night with
friends, no one has to know how much medication you took just to be able to go out. You
don't have to explain why you aren't dancing. It can seem like your life is constantly
controlled by your illness, but ultimately, you still can choose to put on some fun clothes
pretend to be healthy and carefree for a few hours.

Living with an invisible illness, or what some call a hidden or invisible disability, can
have plenty of negative aspects and this article does not attempt to belittle them.
However, to truly live life to the fullest, we must count our blessings.

Some view the fact that they look better than they feel as a curse. Some see it as a
miracle. Despite how unwell we may feel, it's worth acknowledging that it can be a
blessing in our life if we choose to accept it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lisa Copen is the founder of Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Weekheld annually in
Sept and featuring a 5-day virtual conference w/ 20 speakers. Follow Invisible Illness
Week on Twitter for cool prizes and info. Blog about invisible illness on your site, be a
featured guest blogger, meet others, read articles and lots more. Make a difference! And
be sure to visit our new social networking group of influential people who twitter, Illness
Twitters!