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101 Ways to Get Your Ex Girlfriend a!"

Relationships of all kind are like sand held in your hand. Held loosely, with an open hand, the sand remains where it is. The minute you close your hand and squeeze tightly to hold on, the sand trickles through your fingers. KALEEL JAMISON, AUTHOR OF THE NIBBLE THEORY Your partner left you and left you feeling hurt# The $orld seems li"e one bad pla!e# %imple pleasures are no$ torture moments# The shop you &isited together no$ brings ba!" memories of your ex# The a!ti&ity you'd en(oy $ee"ly together teases you $ith $hat good things you shared together# These little reminders ma"e you $ish it'd be great to be together again) but you probably thin" it's o&er fore&er# *'m +enna +ames and spe!iali,e in helping re!ently dumped men and $omen get their ex ba!"# *'m here to tell you no matter ho$ hopeless you thin" your situation is) * belie&e you !an get your ex ba!"# *'&e helped ex !on&i!ts) infidel men and $omen) and !ouples nations apart get ba!" together# You $ere on!e together so there's something your ex lo&ed about you $hether he or she admits it to you or not# -ouples get ba!" together all the time) but it's been a mystery ho$ they did it . until no$# You too !an get your ex ba!" using the 101 tips belo$# This isn't e&erything there is to $in him or her ba!" . for e&erything you need to "no$) * !reated t$o full systems !alled ait /er a!" and ait /im a!" . but these lessons are a good start based on ho$ people get their ex ba!"# e!ause they're only tips) you'll need to ponder on some deeper ones to ha&e the best !han!e at $inning your partner ba!"# *t's important to get to the !ore of $hat really matters $ithout playing stupid games so you !an ha&e your partner in your arms again# %ome tips belo$ $ill hea&ily apply to you $hile others $ill not apply# %ome $ill seem silly to you $hile others !reate light-bulb moments# +ust remember to really thin" about ea!h tip to see ho$ ea!h one !an help your life# 0et's get !ra!"ing $ith the most important tip1

1)

*dentify $hat $ent $rong in your relationship and $hat !ould ha&e

triggered things to spiral do$n$ard#

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2)

3on4t apologi,e for yourself or say things li"e) 5*4m sorry * $as so

horrible to you)6 or 5*4m sorry *4m not good enough#6 You are not the problem . it's li"ely something you did is the problem#

3)

7eep your !ool $hen you see your ex# 8 fe$ slo$ breathes "eep you

!alm# Ta"e fi&e slo$ ones as soon as you see him or her#

4)

Forgi&e your ex9 don4t let negati&e feelings fester to the point at $hi!h

you be!ome resentful#

5)

Gi&e your ex the benefit of the doubt rather than assuming he or she is

out to hurt you# You'll be surprised at ho$ this error for margin ma"es it easier for you to get ba!" together#

6) 7)

3on4t put on a fa!ade so that your ex $ill sho$ interest in you again#

Get honest opinions about both the relationship and your ex from

friends you !an trust#

8)

3on4t o&er$helm your ex $ith gifts and letters# You !an4t get ba!"

together by gi&ing your ex partner in!enti&es to $ant to date you again#

9)
your ex ba!"#

3on4t ma"e ridi!ulous promises that you !an4t "eep in order to enti!e

10)

%ho$ you4re $illing to ma"e !hanges for things to $or" out# This does

not mean !hanging yourself and $hat you stand for) but you must be $illing to !hange beha&iors or habits that are damaging to the relationship#

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11)

0oo" at this experien!e from a fresh perspe!ti&e# %ee it as a !hallenge

or a span of ad&ersity you need to get through# 3on4t loo" upon the brea"up as a blo$ to your ego or an atta!" on your !hara!ter#

12)

/it the gym# Get into some sort of fitness routine and sti!" to it# You'll

feel better from the endorphins and loo" better from the $or"out#

13)

3e&elop a strong support system !onsisting of good friends and family#

+ust li"e a re!o&ering al!oholi! $ould ha&e a sponsor) re!ruit a friend to support you in your moments of $ea"ness# Those tough moments are ine&itable#

14)

%ee" out a therapist# Thro$ a$ay any pre!on!eptions of $hat you

thin" about ha&ing a therapist) and (ust do it# et you4ll be surprised at ho$ ni!e it is to ha&e someone to &ent to#

15)

3on4t gossip or tal" negati&ely about your ex despite ho$ angry) upset)

or hurt you might feel#

16)

Engage in a!ti&ities that re;uire a lot of energy and !an ser&e as a great

release of aggression li"e indoor !y!ling) boxing) "i!"boxing) or tennis# <lay a game of paintball or ta"e yourself to a dri&ing range# When you see your ex you4ll be better able to "eep yourself in !he!"#

17)

Get in your !ar and let it all out# %!ream) shout) !ry) sing . $hate&er

you ha&e to do to let out your frustration) anger) or disappointment#

18)

Get into the present# 3o deep breathing exer!ises $hen you start to feel

out of !ontrol# Either meditate on your o$n) do laps in a s$imming pool) or ta"e a yoga !lass to fo!us solely on your breath to remain in the present#

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19)

When you feel your emotions di!tate your a!tions) step ba!" to ma"e

an honest list of $hat things you ha&e the po$er to !ontrol and $hat things you !an4t# >e!ite the %erenity <rayer1 5God) grant me the serenity to a!!ept the things * !annot !hange) -ourage to !hange the things * !an) 8nd $isdom to "no$ the differen!e#6

20)

Withhold information# You4re probably used to telling your ex

e&erything# 3o your o$n thing and don4t broad!ast it# Get your partner's imagination $or"ing and $ondering $hat you4re up to#

21)

3on4t try to figure out your ex4s s!hedule or ne$ habits so that you !an

mold your day in a $ay that $ould put you in !onta!t $ith your ex#

22)

?a"e yourself more &aluable by !ulti&ating your "no$ledge# What are

some things you !an learn) !lasses you !an ta"e) or boo"s you !an read that $ould gi&e you great material for stimulating !on&ersation@

23)
prefer#

3on4t attempt to !hange your style to $hat you thin" he or she $ould

24)

>ee&aluate your life and set ne$ goals for yourself#

e bold in your

goals# There4s no point in ma"ing small goals you "no$ you4ll rea!h# %tret!h yourself a littleA or a lot#

25)

Get on 8ma,on right no$ and order three boo"s that interest you# This

$ill help you learn and do things you $ish you !ould do $hen single#

26)

Ta"e a !lass in "i!"boxing) massage) or publi! spea"ing# There's plenty

of a$esome businesses and !olleges that ha&e interesting things for you to do# /o$ $ill this stuff get your partner ba!"@ uild your life and your partner $ill !ome# 7e&in -ostner did not ma"e me say that#

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27)

<ra!ti!e saying 5Yes6 more# *n a !ir!umstan!e $hen you $ould

normally de!line an in&itation or refuse to go outside of your !omfort ,one) say yes and do the unusual#

28)

3on4t in&ent manipulati&e ta!ti!s to $in ba!" your ex# Your reunion

should e&ol&e naturally and not be the result of some !onspira!y you !ontri&ed to bring your partner ba!" to you#

29)

-hange your emotional energy# %top d$elling on negati&e self tal")

and fo!us on more positi&e ideas# The $orld is the same !olor as it $as $hen you $ere dating9 don4t paint it gray (ust be!ause you4re not together anymore# Find the good things in life and embody that energy#

30)

3on4t put yourself do$n be!ause you $ere dumped# E&eryone4s been

there# *t4s not your inherent fla$s that dri&e anyone and e&eryone you4&e e&er dated a$ay# There $as (ust some aspe!t of your relationship that $as $ea"# *t4s either something you !an fix or something you !an4t9 but $hate&er the reason for the brea" up) it !ertainly isn4t be!ause you4re a horrible human being#

31)

0et the $ord 5single6 be o"ay# The $ord itself sounds ominous and

daunting) but it4s not a !urse# When you d$ell on the fa!t that you4re single and it4s horrible) you4ll end up exuding that energy so that your ex $ill "no$ ho$ $ea" you are#

32)

3o things that pump up your self-esteem# *f you4re an ex!ellent ro!"

!limber) ta"e your friends and go !limbing# eing super good at something gi&es you a positi&e rush#

33)

3on4t taunt your ex by bringing other members of the opposite sex

around purely to ma"e your ex partner (ealous# *f that happened to you) you'd thin" you $ere no longer !ared for#

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34)

/a&e a sense of humor# 3id she lea&e you be!ause you be!ame li"e

super glue atta!hed to her@ 0augh at it# *f you !an laugh at yourself and embra!e the light-hearted side of things) you4ll be in a less &ulnerable position $hen you t$o are in !onta!t $ith ea!h other# *'m sure there's something funny you !an pi!" out of your brea" upD

35) 36)
seeing@

8!t independent and se!ure rather than aloof and indifferent#

<ut yourself in your ex4s shoes# %ee things from their &antage point#

What role might you ha&e played in the $hole brea" up@ *s there something you4re not

37)

3on4t enter 5$oe is me6-&ille# *t4s not attra!ti&e for you to ta"e on the

role as the unfortunate &i!tim# 5/o$ !ould sheEhe ha&e done this to me@6 5*4&e been nothing but good to my partner#6 The situation su!"s) but you4re more than e;uipped to handle it#

38)

3on4t pester her friends and family soli!iting their help to get ba!"

together# e ni!e to them and they may $ant to help you#

39)

%ho$ your ex partner you !an be o"ay either $ay# You $ould lo&e to

be ba!" together) but you4re perfe!tly !apable of getting on $ithout him or her# *f you're not $anted) it's their loss# You ha&e no idea ho$ sedu!ti&e#

40)

Get a ne$ hair!ut) $hiten your teeth) buy a ne$ pair of (eans or

something else that $ould ma"e you feel better about your image# 3on't go o&erboard though# No tattoos) plasti! surgery) or drasti! !hanges if it4s inspired by the brea" up# 3rasti! measures ma"e you loo" desperate for attention#

41)

Get ob(e!ti&e ad&i!e# Your friends and family might ha&e great ad&i!e)

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but they are li"ely to be biased in your fa&or# %ee" out ad&i!e for someone $ho is deta!hed from the situation to assess $hether or not the relationship has potential or not#

42)

0ist the things you $ant in a relationship and gauge $hether or not

these things are e&en possible $ith your ex#

43)

8dhere to your standards# *f getting ba!" together is going to ta"e

serious !ompromises on your part you don4t feel !omfortable $ith) your ex is probably not $orth getting ba!" together $ith#

44)

e interesting# When you tal" to your ex) don4t sound li"e all you4&e

done is pine for him or her# %ho$ that you4&e been busy and that you4re life has thri&ed e&en though they !hose not to be a part of it#

45)

3e!ide $hat you $ant and establish $hat you $ill and $on4t settle for#

Write it do$n if it helps you sti!" to it#

46)

When you4re in the same spa!e) ma"e eye !onta!t# -on&ey there's still

a part of them that ma"es your heart flutter# 7eep this subtle# 8nything o&er-the-top or !rude is going to $or" against you# 8 little $in" or prolonged glan!e is enough to stir up old emotions if they4re there#

47)

%mile $hen you4re out . e&en if you don4t feel li"e it# *t sho$s your ex

you4re not $allo$ing in pain# %imply engage those mus!les to feel happier# Try it no$D

48)

/andle any and all !onta!t $ith your ex maturely# Nothing is $orse

than ta"ing those Gperhaps rareH moments of !onta!t and ma"ing them $or" against you# You $ant to lea&e them hoping to see you again) not letting out a sigh of relief that you $ere dumped#

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49)

e blunt and not o&er$helming# When dis!ussing the fa!t you $ant to

get ba!" together) state exa!tly $hat you $ant but refrain from going o&erboard and sounding desperate and needy#

50)

3on4t display your anger# %napping at your ex partner Gor anyoneH in

publi! or using passi&e aggression to hurt your ex are not the ans$ers#

51)

Tou!h them in a subtle yet affe!tionate $ay# When you see your ex in

publi! and ha&e established a mature relationship) pla!e a hand on their shoulder as you $al" a$ay#

52)

7eep your distan!e initially after the brea" up and gradually allo$

yourself !onta!t#

53)

?aintain your appearan!e and image $ithout o&ert !hanges# *f you4&e

been a (eans and t-shirt person for your entire relationship and suddenly you $ear a suit to the supermar"et) they'll see right past it#

54)

3on4t put your life on pause simply $aiting to get ba!" together again

before you resume your life# You4ll regret losing this time $hether you get together or not and !han!es are) you4ll end up resenting the poor person for it#

55)

>ead boo"s and $at!h mo&ies that depi!t !hara!ters going through the

same thing as you# *t helps to ha&e someone to empathi,e $ith Ge&en if they are fi!tionalH# 8fter all) some real-life dumpee dreamed those !hara!ters up#

56)

When suffi!ient time has passed) apologi,e for anything you4&e done

$rong# >emember) you4re not apologi,ing for yourself but rather for the mista"es you made to dri&e your partner a$ay#

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57)

e !ool $ith other guys or girls your ex may date# 8s hard as it might

be) it $ill sho$ you4re mature) !onfident in your attra!ti&eness) and not threatened# Then maybe shoot that e&er-so-slightly sedu!ti&e loo" that says you4re all of these things and still ha&e the hots for him or her#

58)

When it seems li"e your ex is sho$ing interest in you again) pull a$ay#

e hard to pin do$n# 3on4t ma"e it easy for them to s!hedule time $ith you#

59)

8&oid adopting your ex's habits and fre;uenting their spots to !at!h up#

%uddenly) you be!ome a !hur!h-goer be!ause you "no$ she $ent e&ery %unday or you be!ome a member at his gym despite the other t$enty gyms in your neighborhood# These a!tions s!ream inse!ure) desperate) and manipulati&e#

60)

%"ip logi!al attempts to get ba!" together# You !annot !on&in!e

someone to get ba!" $ith you &ia logi!# You4re both left-handed so you both !an sit next to ea!h other at Than"sgi&ing dinner or the only reason you nag is be!ause they get $ater all o&er the bathroom floor but you dis!o&ered it4s a!tually the toilet lea"ing# These may seem li"e rational arguments9 but logi! didn4t start your relationship the first time) so it $ill not bring it ba!" this time#

61)

3on4t drin" and dial# *f you4re going to indulge in some al!oholi!

be&erages) ha&e your friends "eep an eye on your phone# When your (udgment is impaired) there4s no telling $hat you4ll say#

62)

>espe!t your ex's property# *'&e heard some horror stories of people

defa!ing an ex's property for some strange reason thin"ing it'll help get them ba!"# No damn $ay# You might be in!lined to spray paint their !ar) but refrain if you e&er $ant to tal" to them again#

63)

>e&enge !an be exerted other $ays beside physi!al damage# %"ip it all#

3o not hurt people in any physi!al) mental) or emotional $ay# Not !ool#

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10

64)

/old your head up high# *f you lose tou!h for a $hile) and she hears

from her friends you4re no$ fired from your (ob and drin"ing all the time) she4ll be than"ing her lu!"y stars she left you $hen she did# *f the next time he hears about you) it4s be!ause you $ere promoted or started a business or got a master4s) he4ll be se!ond-guessing himself#

65)

*f you ha&e "ids together) refrain from using them to manipulate your

ex into being (ealous#

66)

3on4t put mutual friends into an un!omfortable position# 7eep things

neutral# Your friends $ill than" you) and your ex partner (ust might be impressed#

67)

*f she mentions getting ba!" together first) don4t poun!e on the

suggestion# 8pproa!h it in a rational fashion# %he dumped you remember@ 3on4t fall ba!" into her arms $ith no ;uestions as"ed#

68)

8bstain from sex $ith him if you4re not ba!" in a relationship# You

might thin") 5/e!") it4s not li"e it hasn4t happened before#6 *t doesn't matter# You a&oid sex be!ause it tells him he has you at a dial of his phone and there4s no need for a real relationship#

69)

3on4t maneu&er your $ay into their $orld by suddenly befriending

their friends $hen you didn't gi&e them the same attention before# *t's !ompletely seethrough and unfair#

70)

e the person they fell in lo&e $ith# /as time !hanged you in some

negati&e $ay@ 3id you be!ome silently resentful or less of the spontaneous person $hen you t$o first dated@ 3id you morph into someone else $ithout re!ogni,ing it@

71)

0e&erage the past $hen you ha&e !onta!t together# *f you "no$ he has

a fa&orite dress of yours) $ear it# *f she lo&es $hen you $ear short slee&es to sho$ off
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11

your guns) do it# You4re not ma"ing her (ealous or regretful . (ust !alling her attention ba!" to happier) attra!ti&e times#

72)

*f you4re in a group situation together) "no$ $hat the t$o of you

bonded o&er# *f you4re both die-hard fans of an obs!ure band) referen!e that band in !on&ersation $ith someone else# This is parti!ularly effe!ti&e if this $as one of the things that dre$ you together in the first pla!e#

73)

8gree $ith the brea" up# *t's !ounter-intuiti&e yet one of the best things

you !an do to get ba!" togetherD The more you resist the idea of you t$o splitting up) the more you dri&e them a$ay# *f you !on&ey ho$ you understand $hy the relationship suffered) they'll see you get it# %in!e or she isn't trying to !on&in!e you $hy you should 5go a$ay)6 they4ll more $illingly iron out the "in"s#

74)

%imilar to the pre&ious tip) respe!t your ex and their de!ision rather

than bashing and trying to !on&in!e them they made the biggest mista"e of their life# 3oing this pro&es them right#

75)

%top o&er-analy,ing e&erything and blo$ing little a!tions out of

proportion in your mind# *nstead of $ondering $hy your ex is !arrying t$o pi,,a boxes to their !ar) $orry about yourself and $hat little things you !an do to ma"e your day a good one#

76)

Ta"e a trip either alone or $ith your friends . $hate&er you feel li"e

you need# -hanging the s!enery $ill help !hange your perspe!ti&e and to see all the opportunities out there#

77)

/ang out $ith younger !ousins or siblings# eing around the !arefree)

inno!ent) and playful attitude of "ids helps you feel the same $ay#

78)

Get a dog or !at# *t4s ama,ing $hat a little un!onditional lo&e !an doA

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12

not to mention it $ill ta"e your mind off of the brea" up#

79)

Go $ith the flo$# *f you get thro$n into some situation $here you4re

intera!ting $ith your ex and someone ne$ they're dating) don4t let yourself get aggra&ated and bitter# %tay !onfident and roll $ith it# 3on4t let them see you flustered#

80)

%"ip the pity pleas# 3on4t a!t as if you deser&e to be hurt and are

sear!hing for pity# *t4s unattra!ti&e and perpetuates that mentality#

81)

7eep lo&e and relationships as beautiful things# 3on4t $rite them off as

horrible be!ause you're hurt# You're not to be resentful#

82)

Eat healthy# 3on4t binge on (un" food or use food as a !oping

me!hanism# %tay fit and eat $ell# *t4s a natural $ay to "eep your mood lifted and a great $ay to attra!t your partner ba!"#

83)
positi&e#

Wa"e up early# *t4s a simple $ay to feel produ!ti&e) energeti!) and

84)

When you ma"e !onta!t $ith your ex) sho$ genuine interest in $hat

they'&e been up to# 8t the same time you !an a&oid appearing (ealous and hyper!riti!al of $hat they'&e been doing#

85)

*f you feel li"e you need to say something to your ex) be !lear# 3on4t

drop hints hoping they'll figure out $hat you4re feeling# 7eep good !ommuni!ation lines open# This $ill only $or" to your ad&antage#

86)

3e!line in&itations they may extend explaining that you ha&e other

plans or there are things on your agenda# No need to be snide about it# +ust be fran" and honest# They'll get the message you4re out li&ing your life not sitting around $aiting for them to !ome ba!"# /o$e&er) you'll need to $eigh this up against $hether
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1:

it's a !han!e to re!on!ile# *f you t$o are getting things sol&ed) it may be good to a!!ept the in&ite#

87)

Feel happy for yourself# 8!"no$ledge the brea" up as a time for

!hange and gro$th# Your life !an !hange for the good be!ause of $hat's happened#

88)

-asually referen!e instan!es or s!enarios he or she used to find

in!redibly sexy or that $ould turn them on $ithout appearing you're dire!ting it at them# 3on4t be !rude# 0et a sedu!ti&eness per&ade through you and your a!tions#

89)

Get some sunlight# *t4s a great $ay to get your dose of 3: and $ill

boost your mood $ithout fail#

90)

%ing ni!e and loud in the !ar# 3on4t !hoose songs about heartbrea" and

pain# *nstead sing your heart out to bold and inspiring tunes that typi!ally get you pumped up# This $ill ha&e the same great affe!t on your state as smiling#

91)

3on4t be!ome obsessed $ith getting your ex ba!"# *f that be!omes

you4re only dri&ing for!e in life) you4re going to be disappointed# *t's &ital you read this report and e&en get my !omplete ait /im a!" or ait /er a!" !ourse if you feel it's right for you# +ust "no$ you !an li&e $ithout him or her#

92)

%tay a$ay from relati&es and friends you ha&en4t seen in a $hile $ho

$ill $ant to dis!uss the topi! of your brea" up to death#

93)

Try not to be alone on holidays or anni&ersaries that brim $ith old

memories# %urround yourself $ith friends in a neutral atmosphere#

94)

/ang around friends of the opposite sex# The girls or guys $ill gi&e

you a more a!!urate &ersion of $hat your ex is going through or doing on a day-today basis# You4re li"ely to o&eruse your imagination) $hi!h $ill (ust ma"e you feel
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101 Ways to Get Your Ex Girlfriend a!"

1=

horrible#

95)

%tand up straight and "eep your body language strong and !onfident#

Jn!e you start slumping and a!ting timid) you4ll start to feel this $ay# Your ex $ill noti!e too if you happen to run into them#

96)

*n the first fe$ !onta!ts) ha&e !on&ersations $ith your ex so neutral he

or she !an4t really tell you4re de&astated at all#

97)

*n later !onta!ts) !on&erse $ith them in a subtle nostalgi! tone# -on&ey

sexiness $ith your energy not so mu!h $ith your a!tions#

98)

When a reasonable amount of time has passed) send your ex a tasteful

birthday !ard or simple text to sho$ you4re thin"ing about him or her# 3on't be surprised if you get a responseD

99)

0et it go to &oi!e-mail# *f she !alls you to possibly admit $hat a big

mista"e she4s made) it $ill be a po$erful message for her if you4re not 5right there6 to ta"e her !all the first time#

100)

The first tip is so important it needs another mention1 *dentify $hat

$ent $rong in your relationship and $hat !ould ha&e triggered things to spiral do$n$ard#

101)

e the absolute best person you !an be) and don4t let yourself $orry

about $hat your partner thin"s about you# *f you thin" highly of yourself and sho$ it in e&erything you do) he or she $ill see it# There4s nothing more attra!ti&e than a person $ho is sure of oneself and $hat one stands for#

What Should You Do Now?

You'&e learned a lot from reading those 101 $ays to get your ex ba!" so don't stop there#
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101 Ways to Get Your Ex Girlfriend a!"

1B

Ea!h point is the tip of the i!eberg . there's a $hole I0K of the i!eberg hidden that ma"es up the foundation of getting your ex ba!" and ha&ing them $ant you# *f you're feeling a little o&er$helmed) "no$ that transformation is happening# You gro$ $ith ne$ dis!o&eries# *f you find yourself not $anting more help or not doing e&erything you !an to $in your ex) as" yourself1 5What's getting them ba!" and ha&ing them $ant me $orth in my eyes@6 You'll be relie&ed to "no$ *'&e put $hat you need into a simple system !alled ait /er a!" and ait /im a!" that you !an !opy-and-paste into your life# There's plenty more "ey tips to implement li"e the C inno!ent traits you ha&e that turn the opposite sex off and the 10 things any man and $oman $ants### but forget that for a moment# To thank you for reading this report, I've created a free online 7-day email course to further help you get your ex back # ?en and $omen are using (ust it to get ba!" an exD 8ma,ing stuff# Ta"e the next step to get together by getting it for free at baitexba!"#!om# 8fter you'&e signed up for your free training) * re!ommend you get your !opy of ait /er a!" or ait /im a!" online# They're my spe!ials guides people around the $orld use to re!laim and "eep their ex# -li!" their lin"s to read more about them and to get some free tips not dis!ussed here to get ba!" together# Yours in lo&e)

+enna +ames aitEx a!"#!om Ex ba!" spe!ialist 8uthor of ait /er a!" and ait /im a!"

aitEx a!"#!om