A Novel by Carl S.

Plumer

H O W W O R L D

T O S A V E A F R O M D Y I N G

A Demon Apocalypse Love Story

www.somedaypress.com

Sample from HOW TO SAVE A WORLD FROM DYING, Carl S. Plumer

Sample from HOW TO SAVE A WORLD FROM DYING, Carl S. Plumer !

5. Top of the World

The view from the summit of the Empire State Buil in! was beautiful to behol " even for a satanic bein! from the center of the universe. #alum $e!nator%&nfernus ' was as out of proportion to the structure as (in! (on! once was. The emon stoo ei!hteen an a half feet tall. &ts win!span was more than twenty feet across. Scales covere #alum $e!nator%&nfernus" not li)e a sna)e" but li)e a isease. Small hairs the si*e of rose branches !rew at ran om all over its bo y. The eyes on the first of its three hea s ha a serpent+s split pupils" pu)e !reen. The eyes on the secon hea ,which !rew not "e#$%e the first hea but on &op of it the way a cyst woul - were as re as a poison fro!+s. The thir hea was stac)e on top of its brothers" but this hea was not worth tal)in! about. &t was a baby+s hea .an it was ea . The teeth of the bottom%most hea were fille with slime an bits of everythin! it ha ever eaten. The hea above it containe teeth that" while rottin!" were virtually free of ebris. /ust sharp wolf+s teeth" with
'

Pro'ou'(e% #A0%lum $E/%nuh%tour &N%fur%nuhs. Loo#el) &ra'#la&e%, $& mea'# *&+e E,$l Ruler of Hell.-

Sample from HOW TO SAVE A WORLD FROM DYING, Carl S. Plumer .

!ums as rosy as Christmas ribbon. The first hea also sporte hu!e" elephant bat ears ,if there were such a creature-. The hea above ha no ears at all" but it was the hea that wore the 1crown"2 so to spea). That is to say" it isplaye antlers" the )in you+ fin on a creature+s hea han!in! in a !entlemen+s club. 3nly this one was isease " bloo y" worme %up" with the larvae of various insects from throu!hout the universe wri!!lin! aroun insi e an out. The breath of the hea at the bottom ree)e of rotten" putri flesh" of bloo ill%!otten" of stolen life. 3f lies an treachery" of collu in! with the Na*is" of votin! for the other si e. 3f !ossipin! behin your bac) an later lyin! to your face. The hea in the mi le smelle " by contrast" of fire an " of course" brimstone. An o ly of !asoline" too" or maybe )erosene or" perhaps" or inary li!hter flui . #alum $e!nator%&nfernus clawe at a pimple on his bac) with one han " while reachin! aroun an scrapin! har ene poo matter off his rectum with another. 4ith yet another han " it pic)e its nose a'% ate it with a thir . The emon !a*e stupi ly out at the ni!ht+s lan scape" thou!h the thin! was not stupi at all. This beast was" in fact" the lea er of the pac) of satanic bein!s. &t le them to Earth years a!o. 5oun the parents an )ille them. Not 6ust )ille them7 tore them asun er. #alum $e!nator%&nfernus" the same emon that.thou!h chan!e now" morphe as these emons o" accumulatin! an absorbin! other emons into themselves.ha searche the intervenin! years. Searchin! for the son she bore" who shoul have been estroye " as inten e . To have been eaten an i!este an ultimately crappe out on the worl . #alum $e!nator%&nfernus was unluc)y that ay" while his prey ha somehow escape . E8actly as the 3racles sai the boy woul . Le# Prop+/&$e# D/mo'$a0ue#9, which they ha chante an sun! for !enerations. All bloo un er the bri !e now as the boy woul be foun before lon!. The emons felt it.sense it in their bones an their boners. Earth+s so%calle savior was here" in this city" an close by. 0e woul n+t run" because he woul n+t )now he was bein! hunte . The 1one2 woul be cau!ht" torture " an torn apart as his parents were. At that time" the real feastin! coul be!in" the celebration. Because" accor in! to the Prophesies" without )illin! that boy first" they coul be interrupte " ta)en off trac)" even estroye if he were to su enly appear. Best to estroy the boy of the Prophesies first. Then" an only then" coul their 6ob be!in: the annihilation of Earth.

1This was fuc)in+ ama1$'2 Thai" man;2 Timmy /immy shoute . 0e flippe his hair out of his eyes. #eanwhile" hot sauce ,heat level < of <- oo*e own his narrow !oatee" which was really more of an e8ten e soul patch than any )in of bear . 1Tell me about it"2 Bryan sai " burpin!" his eyes crossin! 6ust a bit. 1So" !irlfrien "2 0elena slurre " tal)in! to Dani" 1who was that hun) you were rape over all ni!ht" anyway=2 1T+a& motherfuc)er= 0e was hot" sure. But he ha a stran!e loo) in his eyes" y+)now= Not to say & woul n+t have let him o me. /ust not boyfrien material. & mean" a !irl has !ot to have rules to live by.2 Both !irls !i!!le . Dani farte a >uic) little 1 frrrp32 by acci ent from the chuc)lin!. They stoppe
9

T+e Demo' Prop+e#$e#.

Sample from HOW TO SAVE A WORLD FROM DYING, Carl S. Plumer 4

lau!hin!" sittin! in aw)war silence until they bro)e into chortles" even lou er. 1No way; Di he )now you aren+t a !irl=2 14hat are you tal)in! about" bitch= & am a !irl.2 1?ou+re a tranny" honey.2 1A @trans!en er woman"+ please. A little respect.2 13)ay" o)ay. But while you were flirtin! an all that" he i n+t notice your" uh" well" @other+ assets=2 10e was too run) to see strai!ht" an & )ept his han s away from the southern re!ions. Not that it woul have mattere . &t+s all sheathe in steel anyways.2 They both starte lau!hin! a!ain" which morphe into pin!%pon!in! hiccups. 4hich cause even more lau!hter. 1/ee*" you two. 4hat the hell.2 #allory shove 0elena" !ettin! a bit of peanut sauce on her shoul er" an 6oine in the chuc)lin!. 10a ha ha;2 She splashe wine on 0elena+s blouse" which only cause all to lau!h har er. 0elena+s blouse was wine%colore 7 fortunately" it was the e8act sha e of the stain. She may as well have spille water on herself. 13)ay" &+m outta here"2 Aachary sai " stan in!" swayin! a bit. 1Bolunteerin! at the foo ban) a!ain tomorrow. Early.2 A chorus of !roans" protests" an moc)in! comments. 1?eah" whatever. &+ll see you aroun "2 he sai . 1Anyone want to share a cab=2 #allory stoppe lau!hin! an wipe at the wet stain on 0elena+s blouse. 1She o"2 she sai . 1& mean" I o.2 She snorte . 0er !irlfrien s !i!!le themselves ry. 1& i n+t mean you" babe"2 he sai . Turnin! to the !roup a!ain" he sai " 1Anyone else=2 No ta)ers. 1&n that case"2 Aachary sai " turnin! to #allory. 1?ou rea y to !o=2 1E8actly what are you implyin!= Hee +ee.2 #ore !i!!les from the female peanut !allery. 1Cet ya coat"2 Aach sai " rollin! his eyes. 1 5ee1$1.2

3utsi e" spitball rain pelte the couple. No cabs in si!ht. 14hat the fuc) time is it=2 Aachary as)e " ta)in! out his phone to chec). 1<:'9. Dammit. &t will be li!ht soon.2 0e put his arm aroun #allory" as much to help himself stay upri!ht as to protect her. A cab splashe up Broa way. 10ere we !o"2 sai Aachary. 1TAD&;2 0e wave . The cab s)i e up to them an Aachary opene the oor for #allory" let her in" slamme her oor ti!ht. 0e rushe to the other si e. Before he coul !rab the han le" thou!h" the ta8i pulle away" tires spinnin!. 1He)32 Aachary shoute .

Sample from HOW TO SAVE A WORLD FROM DYING, Carl S. Plumer 6

But she was !one.

Aachary ran own Broa way" li)e an i iot. 0e+ seen this scene in the movies. A lot. 0e+ rea this same passa!e in many ifferent novels. They all ha the i entical plot point. 4hich was: The hero rises to the tas)" comman eers a vehicle" fin s !uns an one or two lethal frien s to become the )i nappers+ worst ni!htmare. Problem was" Aachary wasn+t secretly a traine assassin or a nin6a warrior. /ust a re!ular !uy with an or inary E%to%E 6ob. 0e stoo lonely on the si e of the roa " watchin! the cab weave its way up Broa way an into oblivion. 0e steppe bac) onto the si ewal). 4hat was he feelin!= 0elplessness= 4ere those tears= This was not how me' react. 0is hea spun. 0e stare at his own two han s. 4hy was there no swor " no shot!un" no roc)et launcher in them= &nstea " Aach pulle out his iPhone '9C'F an
H

iale the emer!ency number: G''%G'9%G'H%G'F.

The 4E$# wal)e him throu!h the various options ,1Note: Their menu has chan!e .2-. For mur%er, pre## 7. For a##aul&, pre## . For arme% ro""er), pre## !. For 8$%'app$'2 or o&+er +o#&a2e9 rela&e% #$&ua&$o'#, pre## .. For rape, pre## 4. For m$#%emea'or#, plea#e pre## 6 for &+e m$#%emea'or #u"me'u. For all o&+er (r$me#, pre## :. To repea& &+$# me'u, pre## ;. If )ou are $' $mme%$a&e per$l, plea#e +a'2 up a'% (all <77946<9===9::;97.97;;, op&$o' 7<, #&ar94. If )ou e#&$ma&e &+a& )ou are a"ou& &o %$e >$&+$' &+e 'e?& #$?&) #e(o'%#, plea#e #&a) o' &+e l$'e. If &+a&@# 'o& po##$"le, plea#e #+o,e )our p+o'e up )our o>' a## a'% #&ar& pra)$'2. T+ere@# 'o&+$'2 >e (a' %o for )ou. Aachary thou!ht this last to himself7 they weren+t part of the recor in!. Coul +ve been" but weren+t. Aachary pause for a minute" not sure he remembere which button to push. Somethin! tol him it was H. No" F. No" waitI 0e presse E to listen to the menu a!ain. 7, , !. ?es" he was ri!ht. 0e pushe F. Plea#e >a$&. T+e 'e?& a,a$la"le opera&or >+o (oul%'@& 2$,e a #+$& >$ll "e >$&+ )ou >+e'e,er &+e) %am' >ell >a'& &o. Your >a$& &$me >$ll "e a' e&er'$&) ,Aach was thin)in! all this to himself" a!ain.-. 10ello" what+s your emer!ency=2 1#y !irlfrien +s been )i nappe .2 1Name=2 10ers or mine=2 1?ours.2 1Aach. Jm" Aachary Aemeritus.2 1Can you spell that=2 15irst or last=2 1Both" please.2 15ee1$1. &s this really necessary= Can+t & tell you what happene first= ?ou can ta)e my personal information after.2

T+e Worl%>$%e Emer2e'() Rea(&$o' Me'u.

Sample from HOW TO SAVE A WORLD FROM DYING, Carl S. Plumer :

1/ust followin! S.3.P.F2 14hat=2 1Proce ure.2 1Ah . . .2 Aachary recite the letters that ma e up his name. 1Than) you. All ri!ht" we place your location at FK.L<HH<GM North latitu e" by %LH.GEGH9HM 4est lon!itu e.2 14hat=2 1Broa way an 4est FGth Street" #anhattan.2 13h. $i!ht.2 1&s that the location of the inci ent in >uestion" or have you move on=2 1No" this is pretty much where it happene .2 14e are !atherin! all available vi eo foota!e as we spea). This inclu es foota!e from cellphones connecte to the @net in your current area" for the specific time. 4hich way i the vehicle travel=2 15or as lon! as & coul see them" uptown.2 14e+ll focus on those cameras only for now. 4hat )in of vehicle was it=2 1A ta8i. A New ?or) City yellow cab.2 1A cabbie )i nappe your !irlfrien =2 1& on+t thin) he was a le!itimate cab river.2 13)ay" what is your !irlfrien +s name=2 1#allory Ale8an ria.2 1Spell that please.both first an last.2 1#%A%L%L%3%$%? A%L%E%D%A%N%D%$%&%A.2 1Can you please provi e me with a escription=2 1AmB blac)" shoul er len!th hair. Thin. <%L" <%E. #i %twenties. Cute smile" an her eyes twin)le when she.2 13)ay" & thin) & have enou!h. ?ou shoul spot a patrol bot nearby.2 14hat=2 Aach s>uinte aroun . Across the street" approachin! him above the roofs of the cars" was an N?C BlueBot.N 1?eah" & see it.2 1The bot will ta)e over from here while we analy*e the >uestions=2 1No" wait. Don+t you nee my contact information=2 1No" we+re all set. 4e !athere all that from your phone an connecte to every atabase we nee e " inclu in! C&N(S.<2 1Creat.2
F

i!ital

ata. Do you have any other

Smar&9a## Opera&$'2 Pro(e%ure. Ca#$(all), #&ep9")9#&ep pro(e%ure for +o> &+$'2# are %o'e. W$&+ a&&$&u%e, a'% far &oo of&e', $'ep&$&u%e. T+e Goo2leple? I'&er'a&$o'al Ne&>or8 of D'o>le%2e a'% So($e&), +ou#e% a&, a'% ma$'&a$'e% "), &+e Pe'&a2o'. Pro'ou'(e% *E$'?.-

<

Sample from HOW TO SAVE A WORLD FROM DYING, Carl S. Plumer ;

10ave a !oo 1Aemeritus.2 1$i!ht.2

ay" #r. Aemaroots.2

Aach hun! up an !a*e up at the bot as it escen e with eliberation to hover at about Aach+s eye hei!ht. 14ell now" citi*en"2 the bot s>uaw)e . 1&t woul appear we have wor) to o;2

CARL PLUMER was born in New York City and holds degrees in English and Writing. PLUMER has spent his life surrounded by words. Hes delivered newspapers, worked at a printing press, managed a bookstore, taught writing, wrote literary magazine works, published technical and fiction books, and has always considered himself a writer. His first novel, "Mad About Undead You," was a 2013 Quarterfinalist for the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award, and a 2013 Finalist for the Indie Excellence Award. PLUMER is inspired by his wife Kristen and their four children spread about the globe. To learn more please visit carlplumer.com.