Do I Really Want God?

Above the altar in each of the chapels of the Sisters of Charity, the order founded by Mother Teresa, there are two simple words that tell the story of who they are: I thirst. What do those words mean? For what do they thirst? The words are those of esus, recorded in the nineteenth chapter of ohn!s "ospel, as he hun# upon the cross, $ust moments before his death% ohn tells us esus uttered those words &to fulfill the scripture%' Mother Teresa found in those two simple words the depth of esus! desire% For what did esus thirst? For the will of his Father: the salvation of souls% esus thirsts for the hearts of men and women% Mother Teresa was moved to respond to those words% She was set aflame with love for esus% She felt compelled to (uench esus! thirst for souls% She inspired a small, yet #rowin# army of men and women to ma)e a personal response to esus, to #ive their whole lives as a #ift to him% Stirred by a lon#in# to (uench esus! thirst they!ve set off across the face of the earth to find souls for Christ amon# the poorest of the poor, amon# the for#otten and outcast% Their thirst for esus defines who they are* it #uides all their daily activity% +ven the simplest most mundane tas)s become opportunities to e,press their thirst for esus% They )now who they are and what they want% The Essence of the Christian Life Mother Teresa!s life stood out li)e a lamp burnin# in the ni#ht% She had an e,traordinary impact on most everyone she met% -n ./00 my wife 1ebbie, our five month old son Michael and -, attended a Catholic conference on the family in 2onn, "ermany% was one of forty spea)ers scheduled for the conference% There were almost five thousand people in attendance at each session% The conference had a very academic orientation to it, with an impressive cast of scientists, philosophers and clerics who read lon#, often very borin# papers on )ey issues impactin# the family% The wee) moved alon# with characteristic "erman efficiency, but with little passion or movement of the heart% All that chan#ed when the final spea)er, Mother Teresa entered the room% She wal)ed sli#htly hunched over, shufflin# her feet down the center isle, with a few of her sisters in tow% The entire room stood up and the atmosphere of the place suddenly chan#ed% Around the room - could see people everywhere ma)in# the si#n of the cross, and many of them wept% She hadn!t even said a word, hadn!t even reached the sta#e, and it seemed as thou#h an arrow had been shot into the heart of everyone present% We all )new, without sayin# a word, that an intimate friend of esus had entered the room, and that somehow he was with her in a special way% -t was a reali3ation beyond words, an e,perience of holiness, and it carried with it a power that far e,ceeded the combined impact of the forty presentations we all had endured throu#h the wee)% As - watched her climb the steps to ta)e her seat at the center of the sta#e - felt an ama3in# peace in my heart% She be#an to spea) and - was immediately struc) by the contrast between her words and the words we had presented durin# the wee)% 4ers were so very simple, ours were comple,* she said very little, we said too much% 4er words immediately penetrated our hearts* our words briefly touched the mind and were easily for#otten% There was a power in her words, not only to inform, but also to transform all

who were listenin#* she spo)e with authority and we offered well5informed opinions% 4er words had power primarily because of who she was% An impressive public relations team or a mar)etin# machine didn!t accompany her% There were no hi#h5tech li#hts, sounds or smo)e to ensure that she would have a lar#er5than5life impact on the crowd% -t was simply Teresa of Calcutta, a disciple of esus Christ6 the real deal% She was a livin# e,ample of what esus can do with a human heart and a life #iven wholly to him% Seein# Mother Teresa #ave me hope% +ven thou#h she seemed to be li#ht5 years ahead of me on the road to holiness, - felt a deep conviction that she embodied a crucial fact esus didn!t want me to miss: holiness is real and it is possible, for anyone who wants it% esus promised that very thin# in his Sermon on the Mount: &2lessed are those who hun#er and thirst for ri#hteousness, for they shall be satisfied%' 7Mt% 8:9: esus had called Mother Teresa many years earlier, when she was an un)nown, livin# in obscurity $ust li)e the rest of us% The invitation she heard was to thirst, to pursue esus with hun#er and passion, to yearn for a relationship with him and to accept whatever that meant% She )new, li)e all of us, that she was called to be holy: &;ou, therefore, must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect%' 7Mt% 8:<0: She also )new that holiness was somethin# she could not produce on her own* she simply had no power to do it% What she did )now was that if she too) esus at his word, the =ne who cannot lie, would satisfy her desire, and that he would do the impossible if she $ust #ave him permission% She simply needed to ma)e a decision% What did she want? She made that simple, yet difficult decision, each day, one day at a time% She dared to ris), ta)in# esus at his word, and he who loves to show his faithfulness to those who trust him, made somethin# beautiful out of her life% 4e made her a li#ht to the nations% Thou#h Mother Teresa!s life may seem utterly different then our own, she responded to the same call every human bein# has received from esus% We are all called to holiness% The road to holiness, thou#h its concrete outwor)in# is e,pressed uni(uely in the life of each disciple, be#ins at the same place6with desire, with a thirst for esus, with surrender% Holy Desire Fr% Michael Scanlan often spea)s about the simple truth tau#ht by St% Au#ustine% The essence of Christianity, of the life of a disciple, is holy desire% At the core of the heart of every true disciple of esus is a fundamental decision to respond completely to the desire that runs deeper then any other desire in the human heart% -n the deepest recesses of the heart, below all the other layers of desire, underneath all our dreams, passions and lon#in#s, is the mother of all our desires: to be )nown and loved by "od and to love him in return% The desire for "od is meant to flow from us li)e a river, li)e a #reat wellsprin# within% Sin has bloc)ed its flow% The desire for "od is dammed up by the wounds of sin, pressed down under the multitude of competin# desires, in a heart filled with shame, covetousness, lust, #reed, desire for fame, power and control% These insatiable desires dominate our hearts and our lives% esus came to deal with that problem% ohn!s #ospel relates esus! conversation with the Samaritan woman at the well and what he has come to do% The woman is a

stran#er yet esus )nows the most intimate details about her life% She is livin# with a man who is not her husband, and she had five husbands before him% She is stunned by his insi#ht% esus initiates their conversation by as)in# the woman for a drin)% She is surprised that a man, a ewish man in particular, would spea) to her at all% esus responds to her by sayin#, &-f you )new the #ift of "od, and who it is that is sayin# to you, >"ive me a drin),! you would have as)ed him and he would have #iven you livin# water%' The conversation about water, and (uenchin# one!s thirst, creates the opportunity for esus to help her see the hidden desires of her heart% -n essence esus is sayin#, &if you understood your own desires, what it is you really thirst for, you would not see) to (uench that thirst in relationships with men that leave you dry, wounded and empty%' ?i)e many of us, the Samaritan woman is attemptin# to satisfy her thirst for love in all the wron# places% She fails to see &the #ift of "od' in her life% She doesn!t understand her own spiritual hun#er% esus tells her that there is a thirst within that no water nor multitude of intimate relationships with men can satisfy: &+very one who drin)s of this water will thirst a#ain, but whoever drin)s of the water that - shall #ive him will never thirst* the water that - shall #ive him will become in him a sprin# of water wellin# up to eternal life%' 7 n <:.<: esus has come to tap the sprin# within that has been stopped up by sin and its concomitant desires% Sin never satisfies% @o matter how many times we attempt to drin) at its well, we will be left parched, dry, and empty% -f we fail to pay attention to the deepest lon#in# of our heart, we will end up see)in# satisfaction where it cannot be found% We will spend our days as St% Aaul says, &in empty futility,' attemptin# to satisfy our spiritual thirst with what cannot satisfy% We fool ourselves by thin)in# we can draw water from dry wells: &maybe if - had more money, another boyfriend, a new toy, a different spouse, or a new wardrobe, - would be satisfied%' -t is impossible for us to find satisfaction, and true peace if our thirst for "od is not met% ?i)e the Samaritan woman, the )ey is to reco#ni3e the true nature of our thirst and to see) its satisfaction in esus: &Sir, #ive me this water that - may not thirst%' 7 n <:.8: What Do You Want? @ot lon# a#o, Aope ohn Aaul --, addressed a lar#e crowd of nearly .8B,BBB people in 2ans)a 2ystrica, Slova)ia% 4e spo)e with an ur#ency and sobriety that cau#ht my attention% 4e put his fin#er on one of the most si#nificant problems facin# the Church in +urope today: &-n our days many bapti3ed Christians have not yet made their faith their own in an adult and conscious wayCthey call themselves Christians yet do not respond in a fully responsible way to the #race they have received* they still don t !no" "hat they "ant or "hy they "ant it%' @otice he is sayin# not $ust a few, but &many bapti3ed Christians' find themselves in this position% Their faith is disen#a#ed, sta#nant, without passion or purpose* there is no identifiable thirst or hun#er for "od and the thin#s of "od% "od is )ept at arm!s

len#th, on the mar#ins of life, and many of the bapti3ed, those mar)ed with the si#n of the cross of esus Christ, live as if they do not )now him% They are unmoved, indifferent to the call of "od and the demands of the #ospel% That is alarmin#% -t is a si#n of a #enuine crisis of discipleship% To be a disciple of esus is the polar opposite of what -!ve $ust described% A disciple )nows e,actly what he wants and why he wants it% To be a disciple is to have made a conscious decision of the heart, mind and will to submit our whole lives in radical abandonment and trust to esus Christ% There is no other way to live the #ospel% To fail to choose is to put oneself in particular spiritual peril% esus #ave clear warnin# about what it means to live in this state of indecision and &lu)ewarmness': &- )now your wor)s: you are neither cold nor hot% Would that you were cold or hotD So, because you are lu)ewarm, and neither cold nor hot, - will spew you out of my mouth%' 7Ev F:.85.9: The condition the 4oly Father is describin# is e,actly that which esus said ma)es him sic)D -t is unacceptable to him% To respond lu)ewarmly or with indifference to the astoundin# sacrifice esus has made for us on the cross is a profound affront to "od% @o disciple worthy of the name would ever thin) of doin# such a thin#% esus )nows well that failin# to decide is to decide% There is no standin# still in this world% ;ou are either for him or a#ainst him* you are either movin# deeper into his life or you are driftin# away from him, carried alon# by the tide of secular culture which is daily pushin# esus further to the mar#ins of life% -n an unprecedented way, not only in +urope, but in the whole Western world, the wider secular culture is demandin# that esus be mar#inali3ed% @owhere is it better symboli3ed than in the new Constitution of the +uropean Gnion% Those responsible for draftin# the document insist upon ma)in# no reference whatsoever to the inescapable fact that +urope!s history is a Christian history% Gnderneath this voluntary amnesia is a secular ideolo#y that is totally committed to creatin# a &new world' without reference to esus Christ% Gltimately they want to escape the moral demands and values that characteri3ed +urope!s history% The same battle is ta)in# place here in @orth America% ust last year, the Canadian networ) that hosts our wee)ly television pro#ram, The Choices We Face informed us that one of our pro#rams could not be aired% -t was a show about the current priests! scandal in the Gnited States% 1urin# the pro#ram Ealph Martin, the host, read a few para#raphs from the writin# of St% Catherine of Sienna, who had commented on the problem of active homose,uality amon# priests in her day% 2ecause she said homose,uality was wron#, readin# her words on the pro#ram constituted &hate speech' in some parts of Canada% We were told that if the pro#ram was aired the networ) could be sub$ect to prosecution% -n other words, publicly ac)nowled#in# the teachin# of Scripture and the Catholic Church in this could be considered a crime, punishable by law in Canada%

Dra"in# the $attle Lines The secular culture is drawin# a line in the sand% They are intentionally ma)in# it more difficult for Christians to brin# their worldview into the public s(uare% Any attempt to do so is met with a rabid opposition and public accusations of intolerance and ri#ht5 win# fundamentalism% We are livin# at a time when the battle is heatin# up% -t costs somethin# to be a disciple of esus at a time li)e this% Whatever neutral #round may have e,isted durin# the friendlier days of Christendom, is now #one% There is no lon#er any Christian consensus in our culture to &carry' someone alon#% -t!s a time of decision% Failin# to decide, in a free, conscious and total way, to place one!s loyalty at the feet of esus, will ultimately lead one to oppose him% -f we avoid such a decision we will drift with the wider culture and will eventually start bearin# its fruit% We will find ourselves promotin# values in direct opposition to the Hin#dom of "od% -t!s that very thin# that is bein# revealed in the cler#y se, scandal and the wider crisis of discipleship in the Gnited States% At its most fundamental level, the cler#y se, scandal is a #rotes(ue e,pression of infidelity, of unfaithfulness and disloyalty to Christ% -t is a failure to live the life esus re(uires of all those who wish to be called his disciples% The scandal has, without doubt, produced the lar#est public crisis in the history of the Catholic Church in the Gnited States% ;et as shoc)in# as the scandal has been, it is only one e,ample of a much broader and deeper &crisis of discipleship' that is #rippin# the Church in our time% =n the eve of World ;outh 1ay IBBI in Toronto, GSA Today interviewed a number of students from "eor#etown Gniversity and a few other prominent Catholic schools in the northeast% The students were as)ed what they thou#ht about Aope ohn Aaul --% To a person, they all said they admired him, particularly for his commitment to the poor and for his hi#h sensitivity to environmental issues% 2ut in the same breath, they all said he was dead wron# on issues such as premarital se,, birth control, homose,uality, divorce and &a woman!s ri#ht to choose%' The point of the article was to say that youn# Catholics, thou#h they li)e ohn Aaul --, have no problem openly disa#reein# with his teachin# on a whole set of )ey moral issues% They represent a new )ind of Catholicism, where people no lon#er simply ta)e what is #iven to them, but instead are free to pic) and choose accordin# to their own li#hts% 1iscipleship for these students meant decidin# for themselves what they will or will not accept as truth% Fidelity to Christ is reduced to the radically sub$ective criteria of bein# &true to oneself%' -n essence, followin# esus means whatever - want it to mean% - set the terms of the relationship% Accordin# to a number of recent studies, the attitude of these students is no different than the wider adult Catholic population in the Gnited States% -n an A2C @ews and Washin#ton Aost poll, the attitudes of Catholics toward certain moral (uestions were compared to those of the wider American population% 2oth parties were as)ed if they considered certain behaviors &acceptable%' The results are soberin#% Si,ty5seven percent of Catholics polled considered &premarital se,' acceptable% The non5Catholic 7Americans in #eneral: response was identical% Forty5ei#ht percent of Catholics polled considered &homose,ual relations' acceptable, but only forty5five percent of the wider population found it acceptable% The poll included a number of other )ey (uestions, and each of them,

li)e the two mentioned, show little or no statistical difference between Catholics and the wider population% Those results correspond directly to another study done by Alan Wolfe, a sociolo#ist from 2oston Colle#e, who sou#ht to determine who is winnin# the battle between reli#ion and culture in the Gnited States% That is, who is disciplin# whom? -n his boo), The Transformation of American Religion: How We Actually Live Our Faith, he presents his ar#ument and concludes that, &in every aspect of reli#ious life, American faith has met American culture6and American culture has triumphed%' The point he ma)es is that the way Christians live in our culture is lar#ely indistin#uishable from the wider society% @o doubt these are si#ns of a full5blown &crisis of discipleship%' These and other indicators point to a lar#e numbers of Catholics who have completely lost touch with what it means to be a disciple of esus Christ% 1isciples of esus are to be the li#ht of the world, to be set apart, to be different because they live his life, they communicate his truth, not their own sub$ective preferences% A disciple of esus has consciously renounced his personal preferences* he has freely surrendered any claim to determinin# his &own truth%' St% Aaul understood clearly what it meant to be a disciple: &- have been crucified with Christ and - no lon#er live, but Christ lives in me% The life - live in the body, - live by faith in the Son of "od, who loved me and #ave himself up for me%' 7"alatians I:IB: &For Christ!s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died% %nd he died for all& that those "ho li'e should no lon#er li'e for the(sel'es )ut for hi( "ho died for the( and "as raised a#ain%' 7I Cor 8:.<5.8: *esus Ter(s for Disci+leshi+ Aaul was conscious that to be a disciple of esus meant that he must die% 4e no lon#er lives for himself% 4e has freely and completely renounced his &ri#ht' to determine what it true and how he will live% 4e doesn!t live to please himself or to please others, but to please esus% 4e has one Master, who he )nows has total claim on his life% 4e has accepted the conditions that esus himself set down for authentic discipleship: &-f anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and ta)e up his cross daily and follow me% For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it%' 7?u)e /:IF5I<: Aaul understood that these are the terms of his relationship with esus% This is the criterion for followin# him, for bein# one of his own% There is no other way to live as his disciple* there can be no disconnect between what one believes and how one lives% -nstead, it demands a denial of the relationship we have to ourselves, to our flesh, to the drives deep within us that demand to be heard and obeyed% To follow esus re(uires that we see), on a daily basis, to submit all that we are to him6 our passions, preferences,

ambitions, dreams, time, possessions, and so on% -f we fail to accept fully the criteria esus has laid down for us, the conse(uences are clear: &-f anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters6yes, even his own life6he cannot be my disciple% And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple%' 7?u)e .<:I95 IJ: esus! point is simple: if you want to be his disciple, nothin#, not even our most important and intimate relationships can ta)e precedence over our relationship with him% 4e must come first in our lives% =ur love, obedience, loyalty, passion belon# to him% The choice before each of us is not what particular teachin#s of esus and his Church we will pic) and choose% There is one fundamental decision before all of us: are we #oin# to follow esus or not? 4e hasn!t left all the other choices up to us% 4e has already made them% =ur choice is to be either for or a#ainst him% ,riendshi+ "ith the World The terms of discipleship set by esus are clear and une(uivocal% The passa#es -!ve cited are challen#in#, they embody some of the &hard sayin#s' of esus% The temptation for many of us is to avoid these )inds of passa#es alto#ether, in favor of what seems li)e the li#hter side of esus! teachin#% ;et, if we are #oin# to follow him, and in that, reach our final destination, we need to receive esus! words in their full force and meanin#% Why does esus demand so much? 2ecause he loves us enou#h to tell us the truth: there is no other way to enter the Hin#dom of "od% The only way to enter into all that esus promises his disciples, the #enuine freedom, $oy and peace that esus has won for us is to see) him with all our hearts% There are no shortcuts% -n his Apostolic ?etter, ovo !illennio "neunte, Aope ohn Aaul -- presents a powerful, prophetic vision for the Church in the Third Millennium% At the heart of that vision is a fresh call to radical discipleship% -n that vision he includes a word of warnin# about what happens when we fail to hun#er and thirst for the ?ord: &-t would be wron# to thin) that ordinary Christians can be content with a shallow prayer that is unable to fill their whole life% +specially in the face of the many trials to which today!s world sub$ects faith, they would be not only mediocre Christians but >Christians at ris)%! They would run the insidious ris) of seein# their faith pro#ressively undermined, and would perhaps end up succumbin# to the allure of >substitutes,! acceptin# alternative reli#ious proposals and even indul#in# in far5fetched superstitions%'. Failin# to see) the ?ord whole5heartedly puts our Christian life at ris)% A half5 hearted, minimalist response to the call of esus produces a wea)ened, truncated Christian life% -t is #uaranteed to lead to a pro#ressive underminin# of our faith, ma)in# us easy tar#ets for the allure of the world and deception of the devil% The only way to
.

ohn Aaul --# ovo !illennio "neunte, no% F<%

resist &the many trials to which today!s world sub$ects faith' is to be vi#ilant and alert, and to consciously see) the #race and power of the 4oly Spirit% The 4oly Spirit is the only antidote to the powerful temptations and enticement of the world% When we see) the ?ord esus from our depths, with a true hun#er and thirst, he fills our heart with new dynamism and power% 4e satisfies our thirst so we don!t need to fall prey to the &allure of substitutes%' esus told his disciples that he &came that they may have life, and have it abundantly%' 7 n .B:.B: 4e came to satisfy the deepest desires of the human heart% =nly a satisfied heart can say no to temptation% And only a heart that see)s "od will be satisfied% Without the help of the 4oly Spirit we are left to stru##le a#ainst the world with our own resources% We (uic)ly #row weary of the stru##le, and the Christian life becomes a burden% -nstead of a dynamic, abundant life, Christianity is reduced to a borin#, laborious life of moral strivin# that leaves us unsatisfied% We eventually lose our taste for "od and the thin#s of "od% We become bored, indifferent to his call, and slowly be#in to push esus to the periphery of our life% We simply for#et "od% 1issatisfied, we inevitably see) alternatives% The world stands ready with a seemin#ly endless array of distractions and thrill see)in# to provide the escape we so desperately desire6 power, money, se,, fashion, fame, dru#s, spiritual e,periences, material ac(uisitions, and the possibility of a life of uninterrupted entertainment% As we consume these alternatives we become dependent upon them and they be#in to define our life% They shape the way we thin) and live% -n some cases, they become our very reason for bein#% @one of these counterfeits can satisfy our deepest desires% At best they provide temporary pleasure, distraction or a means of escape from the boredom and meanin#lessness of our lives% That!s why we always need more% The sta##erin# proliferation of porno#raphy in our country provides a soberin# ob$ect lesson% -!ve heard many tra#ic stories of men who be#an with a simple periodic #lance at a porno#raphic ma#a3ine or a mildly porno#raphic website% That simple moment of &escapism' became the doorway to an insatiable habit that eventually consumed them, and in some cases, ruined their lives% What were these men see)in#? "%H% Chesterton made a rather shoc)in# yet revealin# statement that sheds further li#ht on our discussion: &+very man who )noc)s on the door of a brothel is loo)in# for "od%'I At roc) bottom, the search for counterfeits, for escapism and pleasure is a misdirected search for "od% Such a man does not )now his own heart% 4is mind is dar)ened by sin* the ra#in# fire of his own lust easily deceives him% 4e cannot see nor hear the cry from the depth of his heart% 4e remains a stran#er to himself, and in a pathetic, futile attempt to satisfy his deepest desires, he surrenders himself to an ob$ect that cannot satisfy% -n the end, the central, most tra#ic element of this stru##le with the world is the dethronement of "od as the center and source of meanin# in our lives% The Scripture warns a#ainst this very thin#: &1o not love the world or the thin#s in the world% -f any one loves the world, love for the Father is not in him% For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and the lust of
I

1% 1ooley, Collected Wor$s of %&'& Chesterton, -#natius Aress, ./09%

the eyes and the pride of life, is not of the Father but is of the world% And the world passes away, and the lust of it* but he who does the will of "od abides forever%' 7. n .:.8: The warnin# is clear: to love the world and the thin#s of the world is death% The &world' here is the entire system of values, attitudes, lifestyles, behaviors and institutions that are set a#ainst "od and his Hin#dom% -f we love these thin#s, that is, if we clin# to them, rely upon them, loo) to them for sustenance, find our identity in them, ma)e them our &escape,' we will inherit their destiny: we will pass away with them% 2ut if we love the Father, and see) him with our whole heart, findin# our identity and sustenance in him, we will not only taste of his #oodness here and now, but we will inherit what is his: eternal life% What the Scripture is tellin# us is that we become what we love% -n the end, we #et what we most want% &@o one can have a relish for "od and the world simultaneously%'F -f we set aside the pursuit of "od, and thirst after the thin#s of the world, we will #radually find ourselves opposin# "od and his Hin#dom: &1o you not )now that friendship with the world is enmity with "od?' 7 ames <:<: We will literally become "od!s enemy% ,acin# the -)stacles There is a fundamental choice before all of us% -t is truly a matter of life and death% -t is impossible to avoid a decision% The only way to enter the Hin#dom of "od is to consciously choose to love the Hin#% The (uestion facin# all of us is this: What do want? 1o - really want "od? @ot a "od on my terms or on my timetable or accordin# to my li)in#, but the "od who has revealed himself in esus Christ% To choose "od means to hun#er and thirst after him, to pursue him with passion, to direct our freedom toward him and to ma)e his will our own% -n order to ma)e this choice from our depths we must first come face to face with the central obstacle standin# in the way of our abandonment to "od: our self5love% That brin#s us bac) to the first condition esus put upon his disciples: &-f any man would come after me, let him deny himself%' 7Mt .9:I<: esus understood the human condition very well% The primary reason we don!t seriously pursue "od is that we don!t want to pay the price% We don!t want to have to say no to ourselves% We don!t want to have to yield our independence to another, even if the other happens to be "od% -n order to insure that we #et what we want, we put off the decision to follow "od% We don!t face it* we $ust avoid it, often needin# to reassure ourselves that in not ma)in# a decision we haven!t denied "od% We don!t want to consciously oppose "od, we $ust want to ma)e sure we #et what we want% The prospect of lettin# #o of the attachments we have to the world is painful% We!ve #rown dependent upon them and cannot thin) of livin# without them% Consider somethin# as simple as ma)in# time each day to be alone with "od in prayer% Ee#ular personal prayer is vital for the life of a disciple% Without it we simply cannot #row% -t is an irreplaceable lifeline, yet so few people seem to be able to &find the time' to do it% +ven fifteen minutes a day seems nearly impossible% 1espite how &busy' we are, and how little time we have for prayer, we somehow find time for hours of television and
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F% Fenelon, The Royal Way of the Cross, Aaraclete Aress ./0I%

entertainment on a daily basis% Statistics show the national avera#e for television consumption per wee) in the Gnited States is somewhere between twenty and thirty hours% Twenty hours a wee)D The roc) bottom answer to the (uestion, &why don!t we pray?' is simple: we don!t want to% We!d rather do somethin# else% We prefer the consolation in entertainment and other distractions to the discipline of prayer and #rowin# in our relationship with "od% That decision and it is a decision, whether we reco#ni3e it as such or not, has profound conse(uences on our life as disciples% As St% Aaul reminds us: &The point is this: he who sows sparin#ly will also reap sparin#ly, and he who sows bountifully will reap bountifully%' 7I Cor /:9: We don!t )now esus and his will for us* we don!t e,perience the $oy, thrill and hi#h adventure of true discipleship because we don!t want to% We sow sparin#ly in our relationship with him% We are stin#y with our time and attention% As a result we reap sparin#ly% We do not e,perience the bounty he loves to bestow on those who see) him% -nstead, we e,perience boredom, indifference, na##in# feelin#s of #uilt and we are unable to lay hold of his will for our lives% esus remains a distant stran#er, a $ud#e or a harsh tas)master% The Christian life becomes a burden% 1ecisions have conse(uences% =ur simple decision not to pray bears unavoidable fruit: &1o not be deceived* "od is not moc)ed, for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap% For he who sows to his flesh will from the flesh reap corruption* but he who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life%' 7"al 9:J50: Many people say they don!t li)e to pray or to #o to Church because they &don!t #et anythin# out of it%' The reason we don!t #et anythin# out of it is that we don!t put much into itD esus will (uench the pallet of those who #enuinely thirst% Those who lon# and yearn for the ?ord will find him% The #race to be holy, to enter into a deep, relationship with "od is there all the time% What we have to remember is that its development, its #rowth, depends on how #enerously - want to respond to it, on how much - really want it% -t!s a matter of desire% Aursuin# the call of esus is costly% -t re(uires discipline, sacrifice and a persistent desire% -t doesn!t always come easy% -n our modern world we are accustomed to immediate results, tan#ible evidence of our investment% The hard wor) and persistence re(uired in the pursuit of "od can be fri#htenin# and discoura#in#% ;et if we!re honest with ourselves, we can admit to ma)in# sacrifices everyday for thin#s we want% The athlete who trains for a marathon ma)es lon#, hard and unceasin# sacrifice to reach his desired #oal% -f we all pursued esus and his will for our lives with the sin#le5 minded devotion, willin#ness to sacrifice, hi#h ener#y and nearly limitless passion that some men on Wall Street pursue their fortunes, we would become a world of saints% esus tells us: &1o not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust consume and where thieves brea) in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust consumes and where thieves brea) in and steal% For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also%' 7Mt 9:./5I.: What is it that you treasure most? -dentify what it is you most treasure and you will find your heart!s desire% To be a disciple is to have esus alone as &my chosen portion and my cup%' 7As .9:8: 4e is &the treasure hidden in the field' and &the pearl of #reat price%' 7Mt .F:<<, <9: We will not )now esus, as he desires to be )nown, until we have made him our treasure% -f he is our pri3e, the #oal of our lives, our most precious

treasure, he will then possess what he most see)s: our hearts% And when he has our hearts, our hearts will rest, we will taste, in the depths of our bein# the fulfillment of his promise: &Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and - will #ive you rest% Ta)e my yo)e upon you , and learn from me* for - am #entle and lowly of heart, and you will find rest for your souls%' 7Mt ..:I05FB: Drin!in# fro( the Well Where is your heart today? 1o you thirst for esus and his will in your life? 1o you want to put esus at the center of your life? -f so, the followin# su##estions can help you: .% I% F% $e honest. with yourself and with esus% -f you lac) the desire to pursue him, tell him% %s! *esus to #i'e you the desire to desire hi(% We cannot create the desire with our own willpower and resources* we need to ac)nowled#e our need for his help% Re+ent% -f we have )ept esus at a distance we need to ac)nowled#e it and see) his for#iveness% To repent simply means to chan#e direction, to turn our hearts toward esus and the direction of his Hin#dom% -f you!ve never fully surrendered your heart to him, that is the place to start% ;ou can do that by (uietly turnin# to esus ri#ht now and prayin# a simple prayer li)e the followin#: &?ord esus, - want to )now you personally% - admit that - have bro)en my relationship with you throu#h my sins% Than) you for dyin# for my sins so that our relationship can be restored% - open the door of my heart and ac)nowled#e you as my Savior and ?ord% 1irect my life and help me become the person you want me to be% Amen%' <% /ee! *esus in the +laces he can )e found% Eead the bible daily, set aside (uiet time each day for prayer, ma)e fre(uent use of the sacraments, spend time with others who are serious about see)in# esus, and serve others, especially the poor and those most in need% En#a#e *esus (ission% esus told his disciples to, &#o and ma)e disciples of all nations%' Ta)e up your place and e,ercise the #ifts esus has #iven you to e,tend his mission in the earth% -f you don!t )now how to do that, see) out disciples of esus who are doin# it and follow them%

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2efore closin# this boo)let, consider once a#ain the words of esus as he hun# upon the cross at Calvary: &- thirst%' For what does he thirst? 4e thirsts for youD 4e poured out his blood to win your whole heart% 4ave you #iven it all to him? 1o you really want "od?