STRAPPED

MINI ZINE

A Halted Vision 35 mm analog photography

by Andrew Anbar Barsoum>

Volume 1 Issue 111

Belief and Disbelief>

Are you STRAPPED?

Lets face it...youre STRAPPED. Strapped for time, strapped for money...either youre strapped, youre loaded, or youre lying. This mini zine was created to encourage those who put off their creativity (I dont have time!) to come together and create anyways. To encourage each other and become part of a community of other artists, writers, and everyday people who dont even consider themselves creative. Everyone has something interesting to share...even you...ESPECIALLY you...were all strapped, so lets start creating and sharing and be strapped together! (duct tape is optional)

This Issue: Belief and Disbelief>

Beliefs are something that develop over time, changing as our experiences become riddled with complexities. What we dont believe in is just as significant in defining who we are as what we do believe in. Whether its the goodness of mankind, kharma, or the afterlife is just the beginning. Inside this issue of STRAPPED, you will find writers and artists exploring this very topic, leaving us with the question...when stripped down to your core, what remains?

EDITOR- Dori Cameron IN-CHIEF @floggingdori

/STRAPPEDzine STRAPPEDzine@gmail.com

the world around them. It's a filter created by culture, environment, and socioeconomic background among other things. When its tested, it can be earth-shattering and leave you questioning everything. The first time I learned that my belief system may have been flawed or created by my environment was at the age of seven. I said some snarky curse words to a dusty Virgin Mary statue at my grandmother's house. A Sister at my parochial school, Sister Catharine, had told me, "If you swear in the presence of the blessed virgin statue, she will miraculously cry tears of blood right before your sinful eyes." I meekly approached the holy statue that towered over me, paint chipping off her face and hands, and sweetly whispered in a girlish voice the word "Fuck."

Belief is a tool people use to perceive

Sister Catharine is Full of Sh*T

by Kelsey Dyer

I waited. I stared at her solemn

Facing Skyward photography by Barbara Ringler

Scribd.com/STRAPPEDzine Submissions of art, photography, poetry, short stories, prose, paintings, photography, and sketches are entirely welcome and encouraged, wherever you are in the world! Keep writing new material and stay posted online for upcoming themes, writers block suggestions, and more!

expression, disappointed that nothing was happening. I took it a couple steps further, well aware that I was crossing the line of irreverence into full blown sacrilege when I said "Fuck YOU!" It felt so wrong and blasphemous to say, and even now being a recovering Catholic, and very much agnostic, I still have residual guilt over the extreme language to the matriarch of the holy family. It was really just rude at the very least on my part. But she didn't retaliate, she didn't cry, scream or throw a bible at me. Nothing. Nothing happened. It was earth shattering. I thought "Hey!!! Sister Catharine is full of shit! So, what else that I believe to be true is also bullshit?

I learned later that the same rules can be applied outside of religion in

ordinary life. Your beliefs about yourself and your world are shaped by your experiences and by you internally and because you believe it, it becomes your reality until you have a (sometimes necessary) earth-shattering moment when you realize that everything you believed was created essentially by you, and its not always necessarily reality. For years I believed

for all the years I had wasted feeling just no good. I just simply wasnt those things anymore when I removed the belief that I was from the equation. I dried my eyes on my dogs fur and told myself in an inner pep talk, Its important to acknowledge that you have the power to shift your beliefs about yourself and your life at any time. You can always change your mind about what you believe to be true, and in your own way go...Hey! Sister Catharine is full of shit!

I was dumb, lazy and untalented. Because I believed it, I probably was. That belief of shame and self-loathing was my reality. It wasnt until I had some little creative successes, some psychotherapy, and some wonderful people come into my life that I had an earth-shattering moment like that fateful day at my grandmothers house. In the middle of a meltdown on my filthy kitchen floor, I realized that none of those things were true about me, I was just believing another line of complete bullshit. I was not dumb, lazy, or untalented, and once I stopped believing I was, I simply wasnt.

mirror. It took a moment to recognize the face, familiar, yet changed. What bothered her wasnt the dark, heavy bags cushioning her cheeksor the discoloration of her face, a purplish huebut the hollowed, glass eyes bobbing to and fro on the distorted reflection, like a vintage dolls, offsetting yet riveting. And it was then she decided to go and see him. When youre at your wits end, its impossible to know what youll do. She searched through some old texts and found his addressit was late, but covering her right eye with her hand, she walked heavily to her car, ready to commit to whatever came of the visit. feel even queasier than before. She parked, looking at the housenothing fancy, and she wondered if she had the address right. She expected to see an old, bearded man and was surprised to see a youthful face. Perhaps he was the mans son. He motioned her in, and she moved towards a dark room with two seats facing each other. Sitting, their eyes finally met and she felt an easing of the aura, the brightness dimming slowly. Startled, she stood up abruptly, her eyes darting left and right...was she imagining it? He arose from the seat to a standing position, and with his gaze came another wave of relief. Finally, he broke the sounds of her quick gasps for breath...I can help you. Not just physically...the freedom of living stolen from her, screaming from her body, resonating, something he could obviously sense. If you want my help, there are conditions. No money... First, you need to cleanse your thought. Listen to my voice. If you dont believe I can help you, we will both get nothing out of this. She sat back down slowly, closing her eyelids and setting her hands in her lap. sounding like a small gong. Startled, she gasped and opened her eyes to what looked like a copper mortar and pestle. Focus on the singing bowl... your vibrations will eventually match its own. Breathing in and out loudly, she tried to regain focus.

Although she probably shouldnt have, she grabbed her heavy purse and fumbled for a

Headlights pierced through her, brightening the painful aura behind her eye, making her

Psychosomatic Fears marker on paper by Irvin Tofu Guzman

Tears poured down my face in mourning

Was it that obvious she was in deep pain?

A Viceral Visit

Her suffering endured past her breaking

point. Paralyzed, the iron pin wedged between her eyes throbbed and stabbed, like a murder gone wrong. She mostly woke up with it, the aura of white light outlining what starts out as a spot, growing bigger and brighter, outlining the iris

by Dori Cameron

of her right eye. You would think by this day and age, thered be some surgery or miracle cure for such things. But the treatments were not working for her, missing day after day of work, her livelihood and relationships halting, confined to the four bleak walls of her mind, sitting in a darkened room, to sit, to think, but not put forth motion or productivitya taxidermied animal left on display, gathering sneers from those who dont understand.

Suddenly, a loud noise echoes within the room,

Andrew Anbar Barsoum

Follow Your Leader 35 mm photography by

through you if you only believe you can release it. She tried to believe, she wanted to...but it was utterly difficult. She sat stoic for what seemed like hours, but the belief didnt set in. And he knew it. He must have walked up to her...she felt a warm hand on her shoulder and the pain lifted, the bright aura fading to pale darkness, her closed eyes rolling around, trying to find where the pain had gone. This may be the answer. Without the pain, she could travel...wander the streets of unmarked cities, absorbing the language...she could swim in the brisk waters of the Pacific without the suns reflection on the water crippling her head pains...

He spoke slowly and deliberately. Your pain is just a thoughta thought that will pass

Reflection
I reflect on my species behavior in disbelief As they consume myths to cope with their grief Falling from reality wanting more to seek Creating a future that seems bleak.

by Jess Five

Life Lessons with Jay and McCool

E

by Jay Dot CA & Kevin McCool

His hand lifted and the pain injected back slowly. She felt calmer though, and thought, We both have something to gain. My sacrifice is your sacrifice. I can take away your

hell...sitting and waiting for the final relief. He held out a knife, grabbed her palm and sliced it, dripping quickly, making a soft dinging noise into the metal bowl. Fides absque anima vestra. He poured out a substance from an old flask, mixing it with her blood by spinning the bowl in his hand. He drank from it, then she, and holding hands they dipped them into the bowl. Opening her eyes slowly, she rubbed the sleep off of them with warm palms. She laid for a while, enjoying the extra minutes, the softness of the pillow on her cheek, the warmness of the blanket surrounding her, the sunlight seeping in the venetian blinds, heating parts of her face. She got up, the cool wooden planks beneath her feet jarring her body awake, moving towards the bathroom, painting her face for the day, each stroke of makeup purposeful and proud. And although it may be her last day alive, she looked into the mirror to begin her painless day, smiling and fluttering her eyelids in disbelief.

She thought briefly, realizing that Death had touched her years ago. Her bedroom a silent

illness, but you must grant me part of your lifenow, it may take 50 years, or it could happen tomorrowtheres no way of knowing when. This is not an exact science, but it is certain to relieve you of your suffering.

Minds are filled with stories of war Glorifying men who kill, being peaceful ignore Turning life and death into a game Youths seeking to be a one man army for fame. Why do we speak of solace when society loves fighting? Violence is promoted in movies to be exciting But is this really the future we want to be inviting? A self-fulfilling prophecy of doom as penned in religious writing. I believe I believe I believe humanity should be more I believe I believe I believe humans have a good core I think humanity is misled due to how we are condition Healing ourselves and learning kindness can change our position.

very person you will ever talk with throughout life will have at least one topic, if not more, they are so passionate about, a physical altercation may ensue and out of nowhere its come to fisticuffs and Tom OLeary and Jack Johnson have arrived to the party. Some will yell and argue over it as if they are being personally insulted. Dont do that, its just silly. Having a debate and asking the opposing opinion questions can be a great opportunity to learn a thing or two. Learning to calmly agree to disagree with your opposition is a way to win friends and influence people, all the while not making a complete jackass of yourself. ne such topic that people will have a wide variety of opinions about are their personal beliefs or disbeliefs. Whether youre talking about religion, morality or even politics, many can be extremely strong-willed and very opinionated. These beliefs are deeply seeded with the vast majority. It is ill-advised to engage in any conversation pertaining to these subjects when in the company strangers and most importantly, while in a bar setting.

marker on paper by Irvin Tofu Guzman

And Now I See

ome beliefs, or lack thereof, are simple: love, vampires, friendship, focused, non-terminal repeating phantasm (ghosts), goodness in humanity, extra-terrestrials, ethics, Yetis, self-preservation (assholes only), zombies, or another World Series Championship for the Dodgers. These beliefs and disbeliefs are superficial for the most part and can

be taken lightheartedly. any people wont bat an eye whether you agree with them or not, but it can ultimately lead to a fun an interesting conversation and an overall pleasant evening. If this sounds boring to you, its because it is and if a more titillating night is what youre looking for, keep reading.

ere the type of guys that love living the great story. Well do anything to get it and push the envelope as far as needed to make it happen. We have lived many stories, but this round is from a good friend who lived an epic tale that is still told to this day. He shall remain nameless to protect his identity and familys immaculate reputation.

his story took place back in the day, which was a Wednesday, by the way. Our 40th president Ronald Reagan had passed a few days earlier and the news coverage was extensive, to say the least. Our good friend (lets call him R.J. for short) was in a local bar on this day and began to rant aloud that none of the televisions in the joint were showing the Dodger game because funeral coverage was on every channel. In a bar of this magnitude, his expression of opinion may have seemed rational.

a different Crip Skip, but have lived out many situations, mild and wild. Well give you the advice to enjoy your night without incident, but also tell you how fantastic voyages are conceived. Those of you that have spent five minutes with us know that we are habitual line crossers and if we can push someone to the brink of taking our lives, well, it sounds like fun to us! Lets rock-n-roll!!

State of Disbelief graphic design by Colson Coobytron Knight N

s it were, some local folks that evening were not sports fans, but political junkies. One woman, far past her shelf life, felt the need to speak out against R.J. and proceeded to tell him to keep his yap shut because Ronald Reagan was the greatest president that ever lived. R.J. was not at all pleased with her comments and boldly asked her what made this man so great. She quickly replied, He brought down the Berlin Wall! With a quip, he proclaimed, Really?! I didnt see him out there wielding a hammer! Without warning, she grabbed his throat in a surprise sex-choke fashion and refused to let go until her merry band of expired hags were able to pull her away. Please note, R.J. held onto his beverage through the entire confrontation without spilling a drop! This is exactly the kind of story we push the limits for and R.J. did not disappoint. ow the two of us may stroll to

e all have our beliefs and disbeliefs, so learn to be tolerant of others. There is a time and a place to express your opinions, unless, of course, you want to become a legend. Choose your path. Engaging in a smart and intellectual debate is never a bad thing. In fact, it can be a good way to get to know a person and how far you can push until they lose their composure. Remember to choose your words carefully and not immediately offend your opposition because most people are not excited to hear a rant about your beliefs.

Ask these guys ANYTHING! JayAndMcCool@gmail.com

The Wild Ones

by Sean Elliot Martin

ere glad to be of service so be sure to email your questions, comments and rants to: Jayandmccool@gmail.com and well be sure to educate and entertain because thats how we roll!!!

hen youre out and about, its generally for a good time, so drink up, dance more than you should, have a shot or ten, then talk about the time you were abducted by little green men and your cash and prizes were probed while zipping around the galaxy (this is a great pick up line, especially if you have visible scars) and take home that classy lady you were eyeing from across the bar. Most importantly, have fun and leave the arguments for married life.

Their flavour is a Chaos Sundae, A crystaline, radioactive cherry on top, plunging through waves of technicolor screams in the spiritual rapture of enlightened hedonism Frenzies, howls, and dances in flames all covered in wine and sweat and sex, soft earth, life erupting below, Wavering, distorted voices chant the words of answers backed by heavy, savage beat, just distant enough to elude groping ears... Gasps of delight, metallic childrens laughter from naked figures flinging bibles into blazes.

Something Worth Believing In

by Kathryn Cord

Beliefs are a funny thing. They tend to change the older that you get, with the more that you see and learn. Some beliefs that I held dear as a child are still with me while others have slipped away. The ones that remain have only strengthened over time. When you strip away all the bullshit, what is it that makes you who you are? Everyone should do a little self-examination sometimes. What do you hold dear? What do you believe in? The following are what I believe in whole-heartedly. Music- Whether it's smashed together with other sweaty bodies watching a live band, laying on your bed with a record on or driving in your car rocking out. Music does something to us. It can pump you up, calm you down, or zone you out. It is expressive, powerful, all-encompassing. Music soothes my soul.

Next Issue: Fear

When you hear the word Fear, what is the first thing that comes to mind? Some fears develop in childhood and never fade away..are you afraid of the dark after all these years? Have a fear of clowns or zombies? Do spiders send you away screaming? Or is your fear not as distinct? Are you terrified of being rejected? A perfectionist fearful of failing? Are you preparing for the apocalypse? Have you experienced something tramautic that left you completely fearless? All types of fiction and non-fiction are welcome! Do you have a story about being buried alive? Abducted by aliens? A kidnapping? We are looking for artists and writers to feature in our next issue of STRAPPED zine! Submit and and all photography, tattoos, prose, poetry, short stories, artwork, streams of
reused or duplicated for any reason.

Travel- Traveling is important and I can't recommend it more highly. Travel expands your horizons and makes you realize that you are a citizen of the world, not just a country or state. It really drives home the fact that we are all the same- everyone just wants food, shelter, love and to be okay. I'll never forget when I was in Egypt and I saw an elderly couple gazing at the pyramids from a van. Yes, they made it there. Yes, it was amazing. But to walk up and lay your hands on the warm ancient stones - that was something else entirely. Try to travel when you're young enough to soak in every bit. Books- The feeling of completely sinking in to another world is indescribable. I have spent countless hours immersed in books. I have stayed up all night to finish a book that I literally couldn't put down. I have laughed hysterically and sobbed uncontrollably. I have thought about the characters while working or doing errands until I could get back to that universe. Truly nothing like it. Animals- I have always felt deep love and a need to protect animals. I have had many beloved animals through the years who have taught me to be a better person and deeply enriched my life. I have spent hours watching ducks, feeding birds, tending to cats at a shelter, walking my dog. Animals are beautiful and should be respected. I stopped eating them in 2000 when I made the connection. I believe that the animals of the world exist for their own reasons. I respect life.

To Sit and Think 35 mm photography by Andrew Anbar Barsoum

consciousness, haiku, or other pieces relating to this months theme, Fear to STRAPPEDzine@gmail.com !
First time writer? Have writers block? Shoot over an email for individualized feedback and suggestions! (Deadline 1/18/14)

SCAN HERE to Like us on Facebook, stay connected, and get encouragement to keep writing, even though youre STRAPPED.

Love- Humans need love, pure and simple. Humans need touch and human contact. Feeling comfortable and loved is the best feeling in the world. With family, friends, lovers- feeling truly loved and accepted and truly loving others and accepting them is beyond compare. I believe in the golden rule- so simple yet so profound- Don't do anything to anyone else that you don't want done to you. And that's really it. Boom.

Inner Strength watercolor on paper by Thomas Bango

Dori Cameron is a member of The Jezebelles (www.GirlRockChoir.com), the worlds only GIRL.ROCK.CHOIR. based out of Riverside, California. She is a lemon-eating, Guinness All material is copyrighted and may not be drinking, bike enthusiast...and oh yea! She also writes!

ABOUT THE EDITOR:

Cover Photography by Colson Knight www.coobytron.com