Grammar With Humor 16

The Future Continuous The Past Perfect Complete the jokes by putting these verbs in the gaps provided. Watch your spelling: adopt ask entertain need drive go keep leave paint use 1 Thats the tenth game weve lost in a row and we havent even scored a single goal, shouted the angry manager of the football team, Hamstold United. The team captain who had not scored a goal for twenty matches went up to the manager and said: > oss, !ve got a great idea to improve the team. The manager loo"ed at the captain, then said, #onderful$ #hen will you be %.ing& ' (rs )er"ins was e*tremely rich and lived in a large country mansion. +he phoned the fishmonger to order some seafood. > ! will be %%..ing some very important people this evening, she said in her superior,sounding voice. +o send me '- oysters. not too small, not too large, not very old, not tough and certainly not with any sand in them. /ertainly, madam, said the fishmonger. #ith or without pearls& 0 )atric" was a particularly mean person. !nstead of buying things he usually tried to borrow them. 1ne +unday, he called at his ne*t door neighbors house and as"ed: > #ill you be %..ing your lawnmower this afternoon& 2es$ +napped his neighbor, determined not to give )atric" anything. > 3reat$ +aid )atric". Then can ! borrow your golf clubs& 2ou wont be %..ing them if youre cutting your grass$ 4 5ittle (ichael was pulling at his mothers dress in the "itchen to get her attention. #hat is it, (ichael&

> #ill we be %%ing to see the mon"eys as you promised& ut why do you want to see the mon"eys when your grandparents are here& - 6 famous female film star as"ed the artist, )ablo /assels, to paint her. )ablo was tal"ing to his friend about it. >#ill you be %..ing her in the nude& as"ed the friend. 1h no$ said )ablo. !ll be %..ing my clothes on$ 7 #aiter$ Theres a large mouse in my soup$ > 8eep your voice down, sir. 6nd dont wave the mouse about or everyone else in the restaurant will be %.ing for one$ 9 #hy do you want to learn :rench, (r and (rs 1rr& > #ell, well be %%.ing a little :rench baby ne*t month and we want to be able to understand it when it begins to tal". ; <ere" #alton had driven coaches and ta*is all his life but gave up because he was fed up with listening to critical passengers. However, he had no e*perience of any other "ind of wor". He went to a =ob centre and after listening to his story, the officer said, ! can offer you a driving =ob in which you will never be troubled by bac",seat drivers, > 6nd what will ! be %%..ing> as"ed <ere". 6 hearse$

A !W"#!
1 leaving $ entertaining % using & needing ' going ( painting 6 asking ) adopting * driving. Reflection Ho+ many young people HUMOR PIC have been trapped by the virtual +orld. ,ntil and unless they -ree themselves -rom addiction to the virtual +orld. they can be socially and even psychologically impaired.