The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families, Stephen Covey. Book Review, !

"#$

%ennis &'tton '(ve )esiste* the Stephen Covey ban*wagon+ his pa)tic,la) p)esentation *oesn(t appeal to me. His books - to me - )ea* a bit too m,ch like t)acts. .n* the sappy sto)ies an* *)awings kin* of f)eak me o,t. ' have an ove)all sense that he is )est)aining his *esi)e to p)each, to lea* me to salvation, to sho,t /.&E01( B,t ' won(t fo) one single secon* *eny that he has an ,n,s,al insight an* wis*om pe)taining to s,ccess an* p,)pose. So ' )ea* The Seven Habits fo) Families. The)e is a lot in he)e. So m,ch so that ' think this is almost bette) ,se* as a )efe)ence book - something to page th)o,gh eve)y now an* then to m,ll ove) fo) a few *ays. F)om my vantage the )eal val,e of the book comes in the fi)st few chapte)s when Covey e2plo)es the stim,l,s3pa,se3)esponse cycle. Something happens - a chil* b)eaks a vase o) a *a* gets a bon,s an* we have an inclination to act. .ct now. To be in the moment, so to speak. Covey takes some pages to show that this space between action an* )esponse is whe)e we a)e able to *i)ect o,) f,t,)es. 4,) *ecisions abo,t how to )espon* set ,p o,) f,t,)e ci)c,mstances. 't(s a cycle that we can ,se to point o,) lives in a *i)ection of o,) choosing. Th)o,gh the )est of the book he foc,ses on the Seven Habits with applications fo) families+ p)io)ities, )elationships, family an* pe)sonal g)owth. He spen*s a goo* amo,nt of time on the family b,siness plan+ p,tting togethe) a )eal *oc,ment that o,tlines a family(s co)e p)inciples, p)io)ities, an* goals. Take this with a g)ain of salt an* a*5,st it to yo,) family sit,ation. 4the) )eviewe)s point o,t that a family is not a b,siness o) a spo)ts team. T),e eno,gh. B,t the t),ism s,ms it ,p+ it(s easy to get the)e when yo, *on(t know whe)e yo, a)e going. The family plan is an oppo)t,nity to talk abo,t what is impo)tant an* to set common goals. 0othing has to be w)itten in stone. Real b,siness plans ce)tainly a)en(t. They set goals an* *evelop plans fo) how to )each them an* then, at )eg,la) inte)vals, assess how they a)e *oing an* make )e6,isite changes. ' was imp)esse* that Covey st)esses that this is not something that is to be ch,)ne* o,t in a weeken* by *a* - it(s not a ),le book. He ca,tions that eve)yone in the family m,st be able to take the time they nee* to think ha)* abo,t how they an* thei) *esi)es fit into the family. 't(s clea) to me that the plan is well in play when yo, simply sta)t thinking abo,t it. The book settles nicely into Covey(s folksy, ah sh,cks w)iting style. 't(s easy to )ea* an* easy to *igest. Some will call it wishf,l thinking - this is the new millenni,m afte) all. Families look *iffe)ent, ente)tainment looks *iffe)ent, yo, can have an elect)onic pet if yo, p)efe). B,t ' think Covey wo,l* say that we still want the same thing+ pa)ents want thei) chil*)en to g)ow ,p to be kin* an* )espectf,l. 7e want to en5oy meaningf,l time with o,) family an* f)ien*s. Chil*)en want to be ,n*e)stoo* an* listene* to. Tho,gh the times change h,man nat,)e )emains the same. 8eople come to these kin*s of books with *iffe)ent e2pectations. Fo) some the book will p)ovi*e a few ,sef,l tips fo) navigating yo,) family towa)* a known goal. 4the)s will fin* it a go*sen* of

wis*om. ' fin* it ha)* to imagine a family that co,l*n(t benefit f)om a )ea*ing of the Habits fo) Families.