l'm golng Lo dle.

1haL's noLhlng new. l've mulled Lhls LhoughL over and over for years on end.
1oday. lLs dlfferenL man, l'm golng Lo dle !"#$%& 1haL's lL. lL's here. lLs fucklng
[udgmenL day. l knew Lhls was comlng. l've been walLlng.
8uL shlL man. lLs !"#$%'
l keep Lelllng myself lL don'L maLLer, been dead for a long Llme. Lhls box ls cold
enough Lo klll Lhe warmesL of souls. l'm dead Lo my famlly, l'm dead Lo myself.

So why do l care? l shouldn'L. l haven'L. lL's a formallLy Lo flnallze whaL's already
gone. 8uL Loday, lLs dlfferenL. 1oday, lLs real.

1oday l know l'll never see my llLLle glrl's blg brown eyes ever agaln.
l'll never agaln feel Lhe warmLh of arms around me.
never agaln wlll l look ouL my cage, even lf Lo caLch a gllmpse of Lhe world whlch
has forgoLLen me. 1hose Lhlngs have been gone a whlle man, buL shlL, never
agaln. !"#"$% 1haL's a cold word.

l goL noLhlng lefL, man. l goL no soul.
rlson ls Lhe abode of splrlL deaLh. 1hls carcass ls a shell of Lhe human LhaL once
was here. ln less Lhan Lwelve hours Lhe lasL evldence of my exlsLence wlll be
sLamped ouL. 1hls body, condemned and dlsgraced, ls all l've goL. And now
Lhey're Laklng LhaL, Loo. 1hey've gone and Laken everyLhlng. 1hey Look my
home, my money, my dlgnlLy, my sanlLy, my soul. When ls lL gonna be enough?
noL Llll Lhey wlpe me ouL compleLely l guess.
ShlL man, l don'L wanL Lo be wlped ouL. 1hls mlserable exlsLence ls abouL Lhe
only Cod damn Lhlng l've goL Lo show Lhe world anyLhlng anymore. l knew Lhls
day was comln' buL can you blame a man for havlng Lhe falnLesL of hopes, lodged
somewhere deep ln Lhe blackness of my belng? l fucklng denled lL, l lgnored lL, l
subdued lL. 8uL Loday lLs fucklng screamlng aL me. 8egglng Lo be seen, Lo be
known, Lo be loved. 8uL LhaL shlL alnL happenlng, so ()*! *, -.!!-/ 0".1/. 2)*! *,
llke l have been shuL up.

1he guard came and asked for my lasL meal requesL. WhaL a fucklng [oke. l
overheard hlm say one day he's servlng a llfe senLence Loo, excepL dlshed ouL ln
8-hour shlfLs. luck man, come Lrade places. l'll Lake your llfe senLence over mlne
any day. AL leasL you geL ouL allve aL Lhe end of yours, wlLh a nlce cushlon of a
penslon. Some llfe senLence. 1hese guards Lhlnk Lhey goL lL so bad, Lhey call lL
Lhe worsL [ob, Lhen don'L fucklng do lL. none of Lhese assholes are awake or
aware. 1hey [usL Lryln' Lo survlve, Lhey don'L glve a fuck abouL us. 1hey [usL
wanL Lhelr paycheck wlLh as llLLle hassle as posslble. Well, when you lock up and
LreaL humans as less Lhan anlmals, whaL do you expecL? ?ou Lhlnk we're gonna
be nlce and pollLe Lo ya? luck LhaL. 1hey Lhlnk Lhey deserve respecL or some
bullshlL. Man, l Lell em, Lhe day Lhe '()(" respecLs *" - Lhen l'll fucklng respecL
you. My lasL meal? Pow abouL one where l geL Lo slL ln a resLauranL, pampered
by walL sLaff, slpplng on wlne? LasL meal my ass. More llke one lasL lnsulL. ShlL.

1lme has been aL a frozen sLop and yeL Loday lLs movlng llke llghL speed.
l wanL Lo sLop lL, grasp aL lL, Lell someone l'm here.
1here alnL gonna be no famlly by my slde. no moLher Lo hold my hand. no nurse
Lo Lell me lL'll all be okay, cause lLs noL.
luck, lLs never gonna be okay. 3!( 4/0/5 6".46 !" 7/ "8$%.
1haL sLupld volce - LhaL's whaL lL keeps Lryln Lo Lell me. lLs gonna be alrlghL."
Well fuck lL, lLs noL! lL hasn'L been, and lLs noL gonna be. Me, my llfe, lLs noL
okay. My deaLh, lLs noL okay. lLs noL alrlghL.
l *)(("$"+, l loved, l hugged, l wepL, l felL, l gave, l Look, l fucklng 9$!!/5/#. So
go ahead my broLhers, klll me and Lell yourself whaLever you need Lo ln order Lo
sleep aL nlghL. 8uL [usL know, whaL you're dolng, lL ls !"# okay. lL never wlll be.
My volce may be sllenced by Lhe end of Lhe day, buL anoLher wlll rlse.
And anoLher, and anoLher, and anoLher, unLll one day you wlll have no cholce
buL Lo llsLen.

l hear Lhem now.

1he deaLh machlne has come Lo eaL me up.












:5.!!/4 7% ;5.(!.4$ <$-.4$*(8$.!/