The Lonely Lifter

By
Jody Allen
EXT. OUTSIDE OF A GYM - DAY
BRUCE waits by the door alone, occasionally checking his
phone. A variety of couples walk in while he waits. With
each couple that passes, Bruce becomes more and more upset.
BRUCE (V.O.)
They say it gets easier.
A MONTAGE begins (various locations)
...Bruce texts, "Where are you?" This is the fifth time hes
sent this exact text...
BRUCE (V.O.)
They say theres plenty of other
fish in the sea.
...Inside a crowded gym, Bruce loads plates onto the bar to
bench press. Bruce looks around in search of a potential
spot, but every other person is occupied with lifting,
spotting, and blatantly checking out the one girl in the gym
that walks by...
BRUCE (V.O.)
But it doesnt get easier.
...Bruce poses in front of a mirror (front double biceps,
side triceps, most muscular). People walk by in the
background. Occasionally he glances behind him, hoping to
see someone is watching. No one is...
BRUCE (V.O.)
And there arent plenty of other
fish in the sea.
...Bruce eats alone at a two-top. A person walks up and
Bruce looks hopeful for a moment. The person points at the
empty chair and asks if the seat is taken. Bruce shakes his
head no. The person takes the chair from the table...
BRUCE (V.O.)
At least not any that want to be
with me.
...Bruce drunkenly sings "If You Leave Me Now" by Chicago in
a dimly lit karaoke bar. Aside from the bartender, no one
else is present. The song continues to play with the
remainder of the montage...
BRUCE (V.O.)
I tried to get over it.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 2.
...In gym attire, Bruce pushes a grocery cart around the
produce section and down the supplements aisle. The cart is
empty...
BRUCE (V.O.)
I tried meeting new people.
...Bruce creates an account on a bodybuilding message board.
His username, [insert comical and topically relevant
username] is taken...
BRUCE (V.O.)
But when you try, you dont always
succeed.
...Bruce pushes his grocery cart down the frozen food aisle.
Theres a lone six pack of beer in the cart. He pauses in
front of the frozen pizza section...
BRUCE (V.O.)
Sometimes you fail.
...Sitting on his couch beside an empty six pack, Bruce
grabs the last slice of stuffed crust pizza off of the
flattened pizza box and shovels it into his mouth...
BRUCE (V.O.)
Sometimes you fail hard.
INT. BRUCES HOUSE - DAY
The doorbell sounds. A disheveled Bruce is sprawled out on
his couch in his boxer briefs and a pizza stain riddled,
snug-fitting compression shirt. The doorbell sounds again.
Bruce stands up and stares at his pants on the floor. He
attempts to bend over to pick them up, but lacks the
flexibility. He continues to try. The doorbell sounds a
third time. MONICA, Bruces wife, enters the room.
MONICA
Did you order pizza again?
Bruce gives up trying to pick up his pants, turns to his
wife and shakes his head no. Monica crosses her arms.
MONICA (CONTD)
Dont fucking lie to me.
The doorbell sounds a fourth time. Bruce sighs loudly.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 3.
BRUCE
Its cheesesteaks. Chill.
Bruce answers the door sans pants. He gets his food, pays
the DELIVERY GUY, and walks back to the couch. Monica is
still standing with her arms crossed. Bruce plops down and
begins eating.
BRUCE
You mind grabbing the ketchup from
the kitchen? They didnt give me
enough for my fries.
Monica stomps over to Bruce, yanks the cheesesteak out of
his hands, shoves it back into the bag, and walks off
screen. Bruce is displeased but so lethargic he doesnt
chase after her.
BRUCE (CONTD)
Monica...please.
Monica returns with a tub of plain greek yogurt and a spoon.
MONICA
Here, asshole.
Monica hands the greek yogurt to Bruce. Bruce curls his lip.
MONICA (CONTD)
And after youre done eating,
youre going to get up off your
ass, youre going to put on some
fucking pants, and youre going to
go to the god damn gym. Im meeting
Sarah there in thirty, you can
catch a ride with me.
BRUCE
But Wayne--
MONICA
Shut your fat fucking face.
BRUCE
Hes a crossfitter now.
MONICA
What?!
BRUCE
And Sarah said shes going to start
going with him next week.
Despair takes over Monicas face.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 4.
BRUCE (CONTD)
So it looks like youll be losing
your workout partner, too.
SMASH INT. KARAOKE BAR - NIGHT
Monica and Bruce drunkenly sing "If You Leave Me Now" by
Chicago.
FADE OUT