A plus sign. That was how it all started.

Its
amazing how a little plus sign can completely
change your life. There was the shock, the
denial and nally the crying because the
realization was nally beginning to set in. I
was a single, 24 year-old woman about to have
another baby.
In the days when I rst found out I was
pregnant, I was so scared. What was I supposed
to do? Unfortunately, the birth father did not
want to be involved in the pregnancy so I felt
alone. I lived away from my family and I didnt
have many friends who lived in the area. Even
though everyone was very supportive of me,
when night fell I was alone in my thoughts. My
baby was growing inside of me and although I
should have felt joy, most of the time I just tried
to have the courage to get through each day.
In the evening I would call my family to cry
and express my concerns. I wanted what was
best for my baby, but I knew that I could not
provide everything that I wanted for her. I was
already raising a two year old alone.
In order to give her the life that I wanted
her to have, I started looking into adoption
agencies. I wanted to make sure I found the
perfect adoption counselor so I set up meetings
with three different agencies. All of the agencies
ultimately provided the same service but I was
drawn to Holt-Sunny Ridge because of their
warm and caring approach. I wanted an agency
and a counselor who understood my needs.
When I rst met with my adoption counselor,
she put me at ease and gave me hope. She
let me just talk and tell her about everything I
wanted for my child.
One of my biggest concerns with Holt-Sunny
Ridge was that I lived so far away from the
agency. I didnt have a car and I lived in the city,
so although I wanted to work with Holt-Sunny
Ridge, I wasnt sure if I was going to be able to.
I expressed my concerns to my social worker
and she immediately told me that it was no
problem for her to come into the city and meet
me.
In the weeks that followed, my social worker
and I would meet regarding the adoption.
She took care of all the paperwork and met
with the birth father, because she knew it was
difcult for me. I was trying my best to get
through each day. It was so helpful to have her
support and take some of the burden off of
my shoulders. Most of the time we met in the
city, but I also went to Holt-Sunny Ridge for
their birth parent support group. It was such
a relaxing environment where we could hear
each others stories and know that through it all,
we were not alone. Although we all came from
different walks of life, ultimately we shared the
same fears as well as the same hopes for our
childrens futures.
We discussed the options between parenting
and adoption and weighed the pros and cons of
each. Although I wanted to keep her, because
I loved her, I could not parent another child.
I wanted her to have parents who were able
to provide everything that she needed. In the
back of my head, though, the nagging question
Tianas Story:
The Best Decision
for My Baby
A publication of
A young woman faces the fear
and reality of an unplanned
pregnancy, and is able to
make a selfess, loving choice
for her baby.
IL License #529708
Holt-Sunny Ridge Childrens Services
270 Remington Boulevard, Suite C
Bolingbrook, Illinois 60440
(630) 754-4500
Even though it was the most
difcult decision of my life, I felt
at peace. I knew that all of those
long nights trying to make the
best decision for her had paid off.
Call
(800) 222-9666
(800 BABY MOM)
E-mail babymom@holtsunnyridge.org
Text (630) 205-5117
was always how could I nd parents that
would give her everything that she deserved
and love her as much as I loved her? But
somehow I knew in my heart that everything
would work out as it should.
When I met with my social worker, I always
talked about an open adoption. I wanted to
have an arrangement where I was able to see
my daughter and she would know who I was.
I wanted to make sure that she knew I loved
her and would always love her.
When I started to look at families, I was
immediately drawn to Charles and Deborah.
People have asked me what drew me to them
and I give them many reasons, but deep
down I know that there really was only one
reason: when I met them, I felt at peace.
I knew that these were the parents that I
wanted for my baby.
In the weeks that followed, Charles,
Deborah, and I met to get to know each other
more. Throughout this time, I was continually
meeting with my social worker and she
reminded me that no matter how much I
like Deborah and Charles, in the end it was
my choice. I decided to take three days after
Whitneys birth to spend time with her. After
those three days, I would make my decision.
When Whitney was nally born, I looked at
her face and was so in love with her. I never
wanted to take my eyes off of her. The social
worker came to the hospital to see how I was
feeling. Through tears I told her how in love
I was with Whitney. She was perfect in every
way and I knew that she was going to do
amazing things in this world.
On the morning of the placement, I packed
Whitneys things and headed to Holt-Sunny
Ridge. When the moment came to place
Whitney into Deborahs arms, even though it
was the most difcult decision of my life, I felt
at peace. I knew that all of those long nights
trying to make the best decision for her had
paid off. I was appreciative of the preparation
and support I received from family, friends
and Holt-Sunny Ridge. She would always be
my daughter, but now she had the parents
that I had always wanted for her.