THE ADVENTURES OF MARILYN

BY MICK FARREN
7.25.2009
Part 0000a
In which Marilyn, after several weeks in hiding, finally meets with he !"ntr"ller in the #ack "f a B$en"s
%ires ta&i. he !"ntr"ller is "$t "f f"c$s and Marilyn is far fr"m ha''y. (I d"n)t kn"w h"w l"ng I can kee'
"n d"ing this*+
he !"ntr"ller is m"ti"nless and grim. (,ee' d"ing what e&actly*+
(Y"$ kn"w what I)m talking a#"$t.+
he !"ntr"ller remains "$t "f f"c$s and ref$ses t" "ffer her a way "$t. (-", I d"n)t kn"w what y"$)re
talking a#"$t.+
(I)m talking a#"$t d$cking the %'"ll"nian gesta'". I)m talking a#"$t making nice with .i"nysian assh"les.
I)m talking a#"$t r$nning thr"$gh the sewers "f /ienna, f"ll"wing the ne$r"n trail "f 0arry 1ime and the
/ril, and av"iding the wrath "f the M"le Men and the les#ian advances "f 2'ider 3"men wh" want t" g"
"$t and die after they)ve had me. %nd living "n gin and -em#$tal, and45
he !"ntr"ller interr$'ts her. (Y"$)ve always lived "n gin and -em#$tal.+
(hat)s n"t the '"int.+
(2" what is*+
(I never kn"w if my destinati"n is a w"m# "r a t"m#.+
(Y"$)re 6$st tired.+
(I)m tired in tw" h$ndred different realties.+
7
8.25.2009
Part 97
In which Marilyn, heavily disg$ised, disg$sted with the stat$s 9$", fleeing the .i"nysian anarchy, and
carrying her "wn hat, als" leaves the #$ilding.
5.2:.2009
Part ::97
In which Marilyn finds herself ca$ght #etween a r"ck and hard 'lace, "r, t" #e m"re 'recise, an "ld;sch""l
gl"ved heavy and "ne "f the milli"n incarnati"ns "f <r"$ch" Mar&. It)s a 'redicament "f c"smic
'r"'"rti"ns, and, in the #ackgr"$nd a hatstand is "#serving. B"th #asic training and sim'le c"mm"n sense
have ta$ght her never t" tr$st a man in a chea' s$it and #lack gl"ves. hey never mean y"$ any g""d
es'ecially if they)re h"lding a 'ist"l. %nd yet the <r"$ch" m$lti'les are a danger in themselves, es'ecially if
y"$ d"n)t kn"w the secret w"rd and can)t s$mm"n he .$ck. 3ith the <r"$ch"s, y"$ #et y"$r life and
there isn)t a sanity cla$se.
2
5.08.2009
Part :07k
In which Marilyn, in a rare 9$iet m"ment, reflects "n all that has #een l"st and the little that has #een gained
in the a#s$rd and endless c"nflict #etween %'"ll"nians and .i"nysian, and h"w she had never wanted t" #e
inv"lved in the first 'lace. 3ith a grim and weary smile, she w"nders h"w l"ng she can c"nfr"nt the fray
and the m"$ntain "f 'r"#lems that are n"ne "f her making, and still "'erate in the fragmented dis"rientati"n
"f a n"n;linear m$ltiverse, with its 0"wdy dr"'s and w"rmh"les, its glittering n"things and t"wering green
Martians, its clear and c"nstant dangers, its an"malies and 'arad"&es, its l"st tri#es and e&tinct s'ecies, its
strings and c"m'le& mem#ranes, idi"t a$th"rities and a#sence "f "rgasm, and its vast 9$adrants "f damaged
=arth realities, all 'l$nging t" the rand"m and insect"id "#livi"n "f the -ineteen 3ays. Marilyn sighs
dee'ly. 3hy d"es she even have t" kn"w a#"$t all this* 3hy is she even aware "f the -ineteen 3ays* 2he
reaches f"r the -em#$tal.
>
:.27.2009
Part 27>5
In which, f"r s"me days, Marilyn has #een f"ll"wed everywhere #y the wh"lly inane and ann"yingly #$tch
drag;9$een ?ane @$ssell re'licant, wh" n"t "nly sh"ws "ff her legs and wears identical cl"thing t" Marilyn,
#$t insists "n l""king at herself in a small mirr"r at a''r"&imate three min$te intervals. Marilyn first
the"riAed that the re'licant was s"me kind "f infiltrated %'"ll"nian 'sy"'s device, #$t this was re6ected "$t
"f hand #y .i"nysian Intelligence. B%n "&y;m"r"n, Marilyn th"$ght, if every there was "ne.C hey
inf"rmed her that the @$ssell was a m"del 20, #ack;$' g$ardian, and that Marilyn was l$cky t" have s$ch
sing$lar 'ers"nal 'r"tecti"n. @ealiAing that she has n" immediate way "f ridding herself "f the $nwelc"me
'resence, she t$rns her #ack "n the thing and drinks a !"ke.
:
:.0:.2009
Part #f#:D:9
In which Marilyn finds herself sitting #eside the Big Eat Bastard. he Big Eat Bastard hasthe girth "f a
.i"nysian, #$t is really s"mething else. he Big Eat Bastard reaches f"r Marilyn)s knee, and she attem'ts t"
halt him with a withering l""k, #$t she kn"ws the Big Eat Bastard is n"t s" easily st"''ed. he Big Eat
Bastard has the a#ility t" affect minds. he Big Eat Bastard is a#le t" make "thers think in sh"rter and
sh"rter sentences. =ven a Bl"nde <"ddess cann"t easily resist. 2he sends "$t a c"$nter;th"$gh. (<et away
fr"m me. Y"$ are a #ig fat f"$r;sandwich eating m"therf$cker.+ B$t it d"esn)t w"rk. Marilyn finds it harder
and harder. 0er th"$ghts are t"" sim'le. "" sim'le. It is n"t g""d. 3hat shall she d"* he Big Eat Bastard
cl"ses. Marilyn sc"wls. " #e. !"ntin$ed*
5
>.2:.2009
Part 8

In which Marilyn finds herself a''rehended and s$#6ect t" interr"gati"n. 3ishing a little <ar#";time t"
herself, she e&ited via the main;#rane '"int "f the m$ltiverse c"nvergence that was c"ncealed #ehind the
mirr"r in the @""sevelt 0"tel, #$t instead "f gin, -em#$tal, and a l"ng slee', she was immediately
s$rr"$nded #y men in s$its and ties, and $gly w"men with 'ads and 'encils. 2he was h$stled t" a s$ite "n
the seventh fl""r, and '$shed d"wn int" a l"w armchair. he 9$esti"ns came s" thick and fast that she
faltered and st"''ed even trying t" s$''ly these 'e"'le with answers.
(3hat d" y"$ want*+
(3e want inf"rmati"n.+
(3h"se side are y"$ "n*+
(3e want inf"rmati"n.+
(3h" are y"$*+
(he new -$m#er 2.+
(3h" is -$m#er 7*+
(Y"$ are -$m#er 8.+
Marilyn rec"gniAed this game. +I am n"t a n$m#er, I am a #l"nde g"ddess.+
8
>.77.2009
Part 27>:
In which Marilyn finds herself #"th "$traged and distressed. 3ith"$t the slightest hint "f what might #e
c"ming "r any s$ggesti"n "f transiti"n, she materialiAes seated "n a #ed in a less;than;l$&$ry h"tel r""m,
ne&t t" a cy#"rg, drag;9$een re'licant "f ?ane @$ssell. he envir"nment is, "f c"$rse, t"tal ill$si"n, and she
has n" d"$#t that this is the w"rk "f the liAard th$gees fr"m Feta @etic$li, #$t she als" has n" cl$e h"w t"
reverse the 'r"cess and get the hell "$t "f there. It wasn)t #y any means the first time that she had #een
a#d$cted #y aliens, #$t the liAard th$gees, wh" $s$ally liked t" gl"at fr"m #ehind the rectal 'r"#e, are
ref$sing t" sh"w themselves, and that is m$ch m"re dist$r#ing.
>.02.2009
Part 0700700
In which Marilyn, e&'ansive and g"rge"$s, e&citedly leads the cele#rati"ns. 2anta !lara has fallen, the
arm"red train is derailed, the British 0"m"se&$al in the #$rn""se and white r"#es takes n" 'ris"ners,
F"m#ie Bankers have 'acked their g"ld and $rani$m and taken it "n the lam. he M$gw$m's scatter in
c"nf$si"n. %'"ll"nians '$t d"wn their wea'"ns and s$rrender in their th"$sands. .rinks are "n the h"$se
and vict"ri"$s .i"nysians are as dr$nk as sk$nks in twenty dimensi"ns. he files "f the 2ecret P"lice are
#$rning. he Men In 0ats have g"ne with the wind. Princess %$ra has #een arrested and will #e tried #y he
Pe"'le)s !"$rts. Birds sing. !ats dance. ."gs have their day. B$t Marilyn is well aware that, in the reality
streams "f the m$ltiverse, it "nly takes "ne inadvertently st"m'ed #$tterfly t" change everything.
7
2.25.2009
Part l"tr09
In which Marilyn learns that m"tivating an =nt is easier said that d"ne. he .i"nysian 0igh !"mmand had
decided in its dr$nken wisd"m that the =nt in 9$esti"n was cr$cial t" the assa$lt "n the %'"ll"nian
f"rtresses, #$t n" "ne s" m$ch as knew it)s name, let al"ne h"w t" enlist its aide, #eca$se the =nt in 9$esti"n
hadn)t s'"ken in seventy;three years. Marilyn had #een dis'atched #y her handlers t" m"tivate the tree;
creat$re with her g"ddess wiles, #$t she had her d"$#ts. Pressing herself with t"tal a#and"n against the
r"$gh, $nyielding "$ter #ark, she felt n" res'"nse, and was at a l"ss t" kn"w if she and the =nt were in any
way #i";c"m'ati#le, even "n the m"st #asic and 'edestrian level. hen, very sl"wly, s"mething m"ved
inside the =nt, and, r$m#ling l"w, fr"m s"mewhere dee' in its c"re, came what s"$nded like a creaking
sigh. (0aaar"""mmmG+
D
2.0D.2009
P%@ t&997
In which Marilyn #""sts the am'erage "f her wide;eyed, inn"cent, attentive charm t" its highest and m"st
dece'tive level. 2$ch #ehavi"r was always e&'ected "f fr"m the Incredi#ly P"werf$l Man 3h" -ever
!ared " <ive 0is -ame, and she always gave him what he e&'ected. 0e #elieved that she was n"thing
m"re than inane and dec"rative, and it was an err"r that #etrayed the weakness "f his dee'ly r""ted
st$'idity. he Incredi#ly P"werf$l Man 3h" -ever !ared " <ive 0is -ame c"$ld m"ve armies "n a
whim, c"ntr"l c"ntinents if he s" desired, and va'"riAe cities with a single "rder. 0e w"$ld sit in his
shirtsleeves in his #iAarre #$nker, dee' #eneath the megacity, with its inc"ngr$"$sly #"$rge"is dHc"r and its
steel and c"ncrete, lead;lined walls, h"lding "ne "f his "ffensive #""ks "n warfare, and talk gli#ly "f
'article #eam wea'"ns, and kill rati"s, "f mass drivers, and megat"ns, smart #"m#s and c"llateral damage,
acce'ta#le l"ses and m$lti'le reentry, #$t he was t"tally $na#le t" rec"gniAe a g"ddess when he saw "ne. It
was this lack "f 'erce'ti"n and even the m"st f$ndamental intellect that had stiffened Marilyn)s res"lve t"
n$llify his a$th"rity. he 'lan was watertight in its sim'licity. In a few h"$rs, the ,ali;w"rshi''ers w"$ld
c"me f"r him with their knives and silk r"'es. hey w"$ld descend the c"m'r"mised airshaft, enter the
#$nker, and, after little m"re "n his 'art than a strangled gas', the Incredi#ly P"werf$l Man 3h" -ever
!ared " <ive 0is -ame w"$ld #e rem"ved fr"m '"wer. Permanently.
9
7.25.2009
P%@ 7999
In which Marilyn realiAes that the M"lemen have infiltrated the 'arty. 2he is n"t f""led #y their 'l"y "f
disg$ising themselves in chea' wigs, stri'ed s$its and glasses. 2he is well aware that, while claiming
ne$trality, the M"lemen rarely visit the s$rface with anything "ther than malign intent, and have t"" m$ch in
c"mm"n with the !.0.I...s. " av"id an incident, h"wever, Marilyn agrees t" dance with "ne wh" claims
his name is r$man, #$t wh" she rec"gniAes as #eing, #eneath the disg$ise, the n"t"ri"$s !avern Master
2ll$#eely& "f the <reat Eiss$re. Marilyn is tem'ted t" c"m'lain a#"$t the vice;like gri' r$manJ2ll$#eely&
'laces "n her wrist, #$t again she "'ts t" kee' the 'eace. hen, while Marilyn is distracted, t$rning t" smile
at the Erench 0"m"se&$al, the M"leman makes his m"ve. 3ill Marilyn t$rn #ack in time, #ef"re he #ites
"ff her hand*
70
7.79.2009
P%@ 7:0D
In which Marilyn checks int" the 1eader 0"tel. 0er 'lan is t" take a sh"wer, swall"w a handf$l "f
-em#$tal, chase them with a c"$'le "f martinis, and then re'eat as needed. If her l$ck h"lds, she sh"$ld #e
a#le t" slee' f"r a week and let the Inter;dimensi"nal <reat <ame g" "n very well with"$t her.
Inf"rt$nately, 6$st as s""n as she ste's "$t "f the sh"wer, the r""m t$rns disastr"$sly 2te'hen ,ing. he
lights g" "$t, the / t$rns itself "n, and a''ears t" #e self;aware and h"stile. !l$tching a t"wel, #$t
maintaining her g"ddess e9$ili#ri$m, she reaches f"r the 'h"ne. =ven th"$gh it is n"w 'l$gged int" thin air,
she s'eaks int" the handset anyway #eca$se the / ref$ses t" sh"w a 'r"gram and is advancing in her
directi"n. (Please "rganiAe me an e&tracti"n. %nd "rganiAe it right n"w. I think we have a cliff;hanger in
'r"gress.+
P%@ :55
In which Marilyn, d$ring the siege "f %rkham, has #een "'erating al"ne #ehind enemy lines K with"$t
c"ntr"l, #ack;$', "r any clear means "f e&tracti"n K $sing her g"ddess '"wers "f 'ers$asi"n t" s'read
disaffecti"n am"ng the rank and file invaders. 3hen finally e&ha$sted fr"m her eff"rts, she lies d"wn t"
take a fast '"wer;na' "n the wheel#ase "f "ne "f the E"& war machines. 0er reas"ning is sim'le. 3asn)t it
the very last 'lace that they w"$ld l""k f"r her*
77
P%@ A90
In which Marilyn is c"nfr"nted #y an $ntena#le sit$ati"n #$t decides t" make the #est "f it. he @e'tile
,ings "f Lank$ had, with a #$rst "f their all t"" fre9$ent ca'acity f"r increasing the diffic$lty "f already
diffic$lt sit$ati"ns, insisted that n"t "nly did Marilyn wear the tr$ly a#s$rd s$'er;her"ine c"st$me f"r the
$'c"ming missi"n against the Brain =aters, #$t that the wh"lly inc"ngr$"$s garment sh"$ld #e initiated and
energiAed in a rit$al cerem"ny t" #e 'erf"rmed in fr"nt the Lank$ I;!"r's, wh", as far as Marilyn was
c"ncerned, resem#led n"thing m"re than a scaly cr"wd "f #elly;slithering, illiterate s"ci"'aths, seemingly
high "n chea' energy;enhancing chemical 'r"d$cts. %s if this wasn)t #ad en"$gh, she had "nly disc"vered
that the acc$rsed "$tfit was t"'less 6$st min$tes #ef"re the start "f the festivities at which she had clearly
#een 'r"mised as the star attracti"n. Inder m"re n"rmal circ$mstances, she w"$ld have d$g in her heels and
ref$sed t" g" any f$rther with the charade. he @e'tile ,ings "f Lank$ were, h"wever, a cr$cial K if less
than relia#le K segment "f he <rand %lliance, and, in the interests "f the missi"n, she decided t" 'lay
al"ng. %s she t"ld herself while she smiled her widest, m"st engaging, if secretly m"cking smile, gri''ed
her '"wer;sw"rd, and raised the c"st$me)s visi"n;mask, it wasn)t the first time she had st""d t"'less in the
'resence "f l"aths"me snakes.
72
P%@ 27>7
Marilyn sits 'ensive and disc"ntented. (hey send me "n all these wretched advent$res #$t d" they really
give a damn a#"$t me*+ 2he reflects $'"n h"w $ntena#le her r"le in the m$ltiverse has #ec"me, and h"w
weary she is with the ceaselessly shifting set $' and the irrati"nality "f the @and"m Eli's. 2he grimly f$mes
at the n"nsensical "rders fr"m the 7:th Internati"nal, and the c"nstant reminders, transmitted #y 6ack#""ted
ch"r$s #"ys at imereich 27 Macr", "f the a'"caly'tic c"nse9$ences "f an accidental meeting with any "f
the infinite n$m#er "f her -"rma ?ean /aria#les. %nd if that wasn)t #ad en"$gh, she finds herself in the
'er'et$al vice #etween the t"";certain, 6$dgmental, g"ddess;hating %'"ll"l"nians t" the right "f her, and the
t"";h"rny, dr$nken, trigger;ha''y .i"nysian t" the left. Meanwhile the middle gr"$nd 6$st s9$irms like a
slimy cl"ne vat with the likes "f he Ins'eaka#le Fer" Br"thers, %rch#ish"' M"riarty and his .iam"nd
."gs, 'l$s all the #enighted hick;dem"ns wh" are t"" st$'id t" rec"gniAe theyMre l"cked in the re'eating
de'ressi"n killer;cycles "f a ,ell"gg @ift. %nd, finally, fl"ating "ver everything, are the tedi"$s g"ddamned
aliens, with their anal 'r"#es, their tem'"ral cali#rat"rs, and their deathrays. Marilyn sighs dee'ly. (0"w
l"ng t" they seri"$sly e&'ect me t" kee' "n d"ing this*+
7>
P%@ D
In which Marilyn, w"rking as a fifth c"l$mnist f"r the %l#ert 0"ffman Brigade "f the .i"nysian @ed
1egi"n, infiltrates the !%P!NM #ase "f the g"vernment tr""'s with the intenti"n "f $sing her g"ddess
wiles f"r s$#vert the rank and file gr$nts, and sa''ing their will t" fight #ef"re the inevita#le #attle when the
re#els c"me d"wn fr"m the m"$ntains. 2he e&'eriences a m"ment "f 'anic, h"wever, when the sergeant
wra's the silk scarf ar"$nd her neck. !"$ld he #e a h$gee;trained strangler "f ,ali* B$t n". 0e has n" idea
"f her tr$e identity "r missi"n. 0e)s 6$st trying t" #$y her g""d will with gifts. -e&t thing, he)ll #e "ffering
her cigarettes, ch"c"late, and nyl"ns. 2he kn"ws she will easily #end him t" her will. 0asta la vict"ria
siem're.
P%@ 97
In which Marilyn attem'ts t" make c"nversati"n with the "ther g$ests at the #an9$et f"r assem#led
sentients. (3hat have they d"ne t" the =arth*+ 2he asks. (3hat have they d"ne t" "$r fair sister* @avaged
and 'l$ndered, and ri''ed her, and #it her, st$ck her with knives in the side "f the dawn, and tied her with
fences, and dragged her d"wn. I hear a very gentle s"$nd, with y"$r ear d"wn t" the gr"$nd. 3e want the
w"rld and we want it...+ 2he 'a$ses and fr"wns. 2"mething is very wr"ng. (Nh dear. hat)s n"t me. I)m
channeling ?im M"rris"n. 3e m$st have had an ic"n"gra'hic '"etry dist"rt.+ 2he attem'ts t" dismiss the
glitch with a #right disarming smile. (%t least we)re still s'eaking =nglish4aren)t we*+
7:
P%@ 777
In which Marilyn c"nfr"nts the Inner !ircle "f the 2ecret 1egi"n. 2he '"siti"ns herself with her #ack t" the
fire'lace, and with a 'ict$re "f the ."wager =m'ress at her el#"w. 2'eaking nerv"$sly at first, #$t with
increasing a$th"rity, she makes her demands. (Y"$ have left me with"$t any f"rm "f l"gistic s$''"rt. I have
n" s$''lies, n" f""d "r amm$niti"n, n" re'lacements, n" gas"line f"r my tanks, and c"mm$nicati"ns
c"nstantly fail. My tem'"ral grinders are d"wn t" their n$#s, I #arely have en"$gh f$si"n '"wer t" reach the
end "f the e'is"de, the @eality <enerat"rs fail, the M$gw$m's revert t" l"aths"me "riginality, and the
t"wers d" n"t "'en fire. I have t" warn y"$ if this sit$ati"n is 'ermitted t" c"ntin$e, I will have n" "'ti"n
#$t t" switch my allegiance t" he .i"nysian Eederati"n, and y"$ all kn"w what that w"$ld mean.+he
$ltimat$m ca$ses $'r"ar. he Inner !ircle "f the 2ecret 1egi"n v"cally 'r"tests. (Bl"nde <"ddess, s$ch a
realignment w"$ld fly in the face "f everything y"$ stand f"r.+%t this, Marilyn)s e&'ressi"n is #leak.
(<entlemen, y"$ have n" idea what I might stand f"r.+
75
P%@ =@B770
In which Marilyn ta's her 'erfect teeth im'atiently. 2he is an&i"$s, alth"$gh trying t" maintain a calm
demean"r in fr"nt "f the <reen 3arri"rs. 2he kn"ws that, with"$t '"wer, and $na#le t" flee the Bars""mian
reality 9$adrant, she will s""n fall $nder the s'ell "f the herns fr"m the @iver Iss, wh" K led #y the
assassin <"r 0a6$s K will $nd"$#tedly sell her as a warm#"dy t" /"#is ,an, the Mastermind, f"r his evil
research in the la#"rat"ries "f M"r#$s. Marilyn is nerv"$s. 3hat has #ec"me "f h$via, her airshi', and her
#anths* Is $l %&atar still sacking @a&ar t" make himself the 2ec"nd Padwar* M"st im'"rtant, where is
ars arkas, the ?eddak "f hark, and the cr$cial relief c"l$mn*
78
P%@ EI/=;N0
In which Marilyn, stranded #y the t"tal inefficiency "f P"st;%'"caly'se %irlines and missing her sh"es,
finds herself c"nfined in the #ackr""m "f the 0a''y 2k$ll !asin" and @"adh"$se, g$arded #y tw" very
st$'id de'$ty sheriffs fr"m Parsec 79>:7:9:7>DJ3 K als" kn"w as the =&ce'ti"nally .$m# .imensi"n K
that has an ec"n"my #ased "n im'la$si#ly fi&ed gam#ling and ancient '"rk, and a '"litical str$ct$re "f
d"wn;h"me, #eer;dr$nk fascism. ,n"wing this is n"t a ha''y sit$ati"n, and these hick c"'s are wh"lly
$naware "f her <"ddess 2tat$s, she em'l"ys the "nly tactical alternative left in her arsenal. 2he ign"res
them in the h"'e that they will vanish.
P%@ 777
In which Marilyn lights a sym#"lic cigarette and takes st"ck "f the sham#les left after the Beasts ceased
h"wling. Perha's there is light "n the 9$asi;h"riA"n, she m$ses, #$t the inter;dimensi"n c"ntin$$m is s$ch a
f$cked $' mess after all that)s #een inflicted "n it. he frag;sna''ers have d"ne their w"rst, the 'se$d";
1"rds have #een acting with t"tal irres'"nsi#ility. 2lan has w"ken, and the Nld .ark <"ds are "nly ke't
fr"m r$nning l""se and wreaking the $ltimate hav"c #y the m"st flimsy "f virt$al mem#ranes. (Nh dear,+
she m$rm$rs, 9$ietly e&haling, (#$t h"w is "ne "ver;w"rked twentieth cent$ry #l"nde g"ddess s$''"sed t"
c"'e with it all*+ %nd then she smiles, 5B$t the light really is "n the h"riA"n, isnMt it*5
77
P%@ 72>L!
In which Marilyn, after #eing tedi"$sly tra''ed "n either side #y the 3ell <r""med Men In he !hea'
2eats, disc"vers t" her delight that her "ld and dear friend, O$agmar the .estr"yer, has finally arrived fr"m
Planet ?, where he had #een dis'"rting and dissi'ating in the %ndr"meda <ala&y. Marilyn is d"$#ly 'leased
that O$agmar the .estr"yer, al"ng with his vast retin$e, 'l$s n$mer"$s e&tra and irreg$lar thralls,
c"nc$#ines, and #"dy hel"ts, has managed t" make the tri' with"$t incinerating his Beamshi', "r d"ing any
m"re c"smic damage t" the '"lym"r'h"$s reality.
7D
P%@ 7009
In which Marilyn, after tw" martinis and three -em#$tal have ca$sed a m"mentary la'se "f her n"rmal
vigilance, and l$lled her int" #elieving herself safe in transient s$#;reality, is taken #y s$r'rise #y "ne "f the
weed =lite "f the =vil Men in 0ats. 3ith his hands ar"$nd her thr"at, she screams des'erately. B$t, as
every#"dy kn"ws, in transient s$#;reality n" "ne can hear y"$ scream. Nh n"G !an this the end "f Marilyn*
P%@ 999
In which Marilyn, emerging instr$ment;#lind. and with arms #ared, fr"m the -$ll /"id "f Llnwr, after
c"m'leting the !hallenge "f ."rmand$, finds herself in a heavily dist"rted, #lind;alley time variati"n in
which %maA"n reen ref$gees fr"m the Mek"nta '$rges sh""t F"ms f"r s'"rt fr"m magn";"rnith"'ters, and
where the "nly s$#sistence ind$stry is the mass 'r"d$cti"n "f '"rn"gra'hic garden gn"mes, and the s"le
means "f mass c"mm$nicati"n are r$m'led and f"lded c"'ies "f he 0"llyw""d @e'"rter in which the
news is always #ad. hen a crescent f"rmati"n "f %damski discs, '"ssi#ly $nder the c"mmand "f the .read
L'#c9wA'$c, a''ear "verhead. (O$ick Marilyn,+ cry the ree 3enches, (l""k $' #ef"re it)s t"" lateG+
79
P%@ c;7;22
In which Marilyn, alth"$gh kn"w f"r her $n'$nct$ality, lives t" advent$re yet an"ther;day. @am';am'ing
her s$'er;wiles in the @""m;3ith;!he9$ered;3all'a'er, she easily distracts and "ver'"wers a slack;faced
B"#;."##s sim$lacra, sent #y the Pink B"ys t" restrain her fr"m serving the inverte#rate;satisfacti"n "f Mr.
29$id. he sim$lacra f""lishly #etrays himself #y leaving his dark;hat in 'lain;sight "n the sm""th;c"$ch.
%nd als" neglecting t" #ring his #riar;'i'e. 3hat him w"rry* he rare;a'hides all cry, (@et$rn t" the time;
stream.+ %nd Marilyn "#liges as they knew she w"$ld.
P%@ 9:
In which Marilyn is left m"mentarily with"$t f$ncti"nal shields and #lind;minded in the hy'erdyne
#ackwash "f "verdrive. In that e&'"sed instant she is ca't$red #y the 2atra' "f -ew Pangaea and held in a
c"nfinement ca's$le rigged t" resem#le the #ack "f a circa mid;7950s !"$'e .e /ille. 0"sed with al'ha
rays and #eta;rhythm #ar#it$rate s$rr"gates, she is 'resented with the Nmega !andle $nder the false g$ise
that it is her #irthday. Marilyn is t"" hammered t" kn"w that, if the Nmega !andle is e&ting$ished, "ne
h$ndred and f"rty seven th"$sand c"ngr$ent realities are e&ting$ished right al"ng with it, 'l$s the lives "f
incalc$la#le 9$adrilli"ns "f sentient entities. he ne$r"n sna''ers $rge her t" #l"w it "$t. It is their
missi"n.(Bl"w, MarilynG Bl"wG ((Bl"w, MarilynG Bl"wG (B$t a sliver "f Marilyn)s reality reasserts itself.
(his d"esn)t 9$ite seem right. here is a disr$'ti"n in he E"rce.+(Bl"w, MarilynG Bl"wG ((Bl"w,
MarilynG Bl"wG ((I d"n)t kn"w4+B$t, $nder immense 'ress$re, she '$ts her li's t"gether anyway4
B!an the Erench 0"m"se&$al and the .i"nysian M"# arrive in time t" avert disaster*C
20
P%@ >%
In which Marilyn K aware "f the threat '"sed t" all sentient life f"r at least a h$ndred 'arsecs in any directi"n #y
the c"m#ined f"rces "f he %m"r'h"$s Blight, %Aath"th >, Eat Men in 0ats, and the %laskan =nergy .rain K
enlists in . !"r's "f the Pe"'le)s %rmy "f the E"$rteenth Internati"nal and v"l$nteers f"r agent training. B$t
when e&'ected t" lift weights, right "$tside the .""rs "f Perce'ti"n, she is less than ha''y. (%ll I need t" learn is
a few sim'le techni9$es like the !"nfig$rati"n "f Yian s" I can create the eslaJ Y$gg"th Particle Beam. I)m
Marilyn. I kinda kn"w the rest.+ " which the .rill Instr$ct"r, wh" is c"nfig$red t" l""k like =rnest B"rgnine,
res'"nds that she needs t" c"m'lete the sim'le essentials #ef"re she m"ves "n t" c"m#at meta'hysics. 0e had
smiled $n'leasantly. (hat)s why they call it #asic training.+
P%@ 777
In which a heavily cl"aked $nderc"ver assassin attem'ts t" cli' Marilyn with e&treme 're6$dice in the "r#iting
cafeteria. B$t Marilyn rec"gniAes him as a killer trained in the disci'lines "f the Magn$m Inn"minand$m "f the
Yell"w 2ign, m"st likely detached fr"m the inner cadres "f the %m"r'h"$s Blight #y Nrder "f -yarlath"te', "n a
c"ntract kill f"r the .aem"n;2$ltan %Aath"th >. -"rmally s$ch fa$&;nin6a were 'inkish things, a#"$t five feet
tall, with cr$stace"$s #"dies, mem#rane wings, and elli's"id heads c"vered with m$ltit$des "f sh"rt antennae,
#$t this "ne had #een rendered wh"lly h$man and, in fact, at first glance, l""ked a l"t like the y"$ng @ichard
3idmark 'laying "mmy Id" in the 79:7 m"vie ,iss Nf .eath. B.irected #y 0enry 0athaway.C Marilyn w"$ld
have 'r"#a#ly made the assassin f"r what he was when he attem'ted the first im'la$si#le lis'. (Y"$ kn"w what I
d" t" s9$ealers* I let Mem have it in the #elly, s" they can r"ll ar"$nd f"r a l"ng time thinkinM it "ver.+ B$t Marilyn
had the 1"vecraft In;Mask I/, disg$ised as a 0einA ,etch$' #"ttle, that gave her s$ch early warning "f the
threat that she was ready f"r the killer, and even c"$ld smile kn"wingly as she e&tended her fingers in the
!"nfig$rati"n "f Yian t" create the thwarting and very fatal eslaJY$gg"th .e 1$&e Particle Beam, that w"$ld
t"tally dis'atch the evil assailant.
27
P%@ 9
In which Marilyn, finds herself with"$t air c"ver "r infantry s$''"rt, and c$t "ff fr"m the Pe"'le)s %rmy "f
the E"$rteenth Internati"nal. 2he m"ves swiftly #ack $' the timestream t" ='is"de -ine. Ising the
disg$ised Blasc" 1adder, and sim$ltane"$sly em'l"ying the hidden '"wer "f the !alendar "f Lve&$laca'a
the 2$n 0ammer, she calc$lates that the secret "f life, the $niverse, and everything is n"t :2 after all #$t in
fact >0G BB$t she kee's smiling, and wears her gl"ves. he Eat Men in 0ats are cl"sing in "n critical
vect"rs.C
P%@ 2>
In which Marilyn K finally a#and"ned #y .;!"r's, and with "nly -em#$tal t" defend herself K has n"
ch"ice. %s Yancey 2lide 'revi"$sly advised, she 9$ickly re'licates as the attack shi's "f Feta @etic$li war'
fr"m "r#it int" her ne$ral s$#s'ace.
22
P%@ 77
In which Marilyn, acc"m'anied #y the Erench h"m"se&$al, 'eers int" the s$#way t$nnel seeking the ,ing
"f he 1iAardmen fr"m the 0"ll"w =arth.
5his sh"$ld #e a #""k.5
2>