My Scientific Observations on Sleep Deprivation in Women

Ladies, weve been lied to. Youve heard the medical reasons !iven to e"plain why
women are so tired. #m here to tell you they are lies. $nd #m !oin! to e"pose the reason
behind this sinister act of deception.
%ow, most of you are mothers, so you already &now that bein! a mom is enou!h to ma&e
anyone tired. $s in, never !et enou!h sleep tired. #f the phrase 'sleepin! li&e a baby(
were ta&en as a literal comparison, it would mean 'lyin! in a crib screamin! li&e a
!riffin.(
)ut, what about later* When the babys no lon!er a baby* Yes, theres the ferryin! from
soccer !ame to swimmin! pool. )ut that doesnt &eep you from sleepin! at ni!ht, ri!ht*
Worryin! about the little ones future mi!ht &eep you awa&e ni!hts, but not every ni!ht.
%o, the problem isnt motherhood. +he problem is, your husband.
Does this sound familiar* Your husband comes home, falls asleep in his recliner, wa&es
lon! enou!h to eat dinner, then falls asleep a!ain while watchin! tv, only wa&in! a!ain
when you sha&e him to let him &now its time to !o to bed* Once he actually hits that
bed, he falls bac& into that blissful state of unconsciousness that allows him to continue
sleepin! even throu!h the horrible noises hes ma&in! that are &eepin! YO- awa&e. )ut
the snorin! isn.t the main culprit. Yes, # &now its impossible to sleep ne"t to a camel with
nose polyps, but thats only part of the problem. +he real problem based on my thorou!h
scientific study, is the amount of sleep your husband is !ettin!. /e.s ta&in! far more than
his share0
You see, there are only a set number of hours of sleep per household allowed, &nown as
'S+$1/( 2Set +ime $llowed 1er /ousehold3. %ow, if you add up all the hours your
husband is sleepin! 4 dont for!et to add the wee&end naps, tv recliner snoo5in!, and
couch6snorin! time to his ni!htly sleep hours 4 you will find that he is ho!!in! a
whoppin! 7#7+88% or more hours per day0 $t the absolute M$9#M-M of nine hours
per person allotted, how many of those hours is he stealin! from you* Lets do the math,
shall we*
Say you have two children. +hat ma&es four persons, includin! you and your spouse. You
simply multiply the hours the universe allows per person 2as previously stated, :
ma"imum3 by the number of persons in your household 2;3, and you will see your family
is allotted <= hrs. per day. Well, your husband is usin! as many as 7#7+88% of those
hours, leavin! only >? hours for the rest of you0 $s a carin! and nurturin! mother, you
want to be sure your children are !ettin! enou!h sleep, so you ma&e sure they !et ei!ht
hours every ni!ht. +his leaves only 7#@8 /O-AS for your personal use, none of which
you will ever use, than&s to the aforementioned nasally6challen!ed camel.
%o wonder youre so tired0
%eed # remind you that we still live in a male6dominated society* You will notice that
when women have complained to their 2male3 doctors about bein! tired, they have been
told by the 2male3 doctors that this tiredness is due to low levels of iron, a side6effect of
bein! female, and told to ta&e our Beritol. /mmm. %o one li&es to !ive up the comforts
in life they have earned by conditionin! others to accept their lies. So, arent you !lad #
did these studies, and blew this conspiracy wide open* You are now armed with the truth
2somethin! your husband already &new about3, and can confront him with his selfish use
of YO-A sleep hours0 Bo ahead0 Do it now0
Dont mention # told you.