$2,259,061.

31

"I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land." Jon Stewart

VOLUME THREE

I S S U E 48

1 1 . 2 7 .14

Romance Blossoms Between County & Media | Fake News | Colbys Energy Plan

P L U S : 7 D AY N E W B R A U N F E L S L I V E M U S I C G U I D E

WEEK 12 RESULTS: PAGE 14!

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table

of

contents

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Council takes a few

steps back.

Fake News

All original content is copyright

TX Citizen. TX Citizen is published
every Thursday.

TX CITIZEN
1111 N. Walnut Avenue
New Braunfels, TX 78130
830.358.2493

One copy (per person) of TX Citizen is

available free of charge, with the prior written
consent of TX Citizen required to remove
multiple copies from distribution points.
Multiple copies and back issues are available
at TX Citizen offices for $2.50 each.

STAFF / CONTACT
Publisher/Editor-in-Chief Mike Reynolds
Director of Distribution Chase Cochran
Art Director Kayla Wallace
Editorial: news@txcitizen.com
Advertising: sales@txcitizen.com
Distribution: distribution@txcitizen.com

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1 WORD
ST

Here. We. Go. Again.

WITH

MIKE
REYNOLDS

City
Council
decided
to
assemble yet another River
Advisory Committee, and to
their credit, declined to assign
recalled District Six Councilman
Ken Valentine to a post within it.
Heres the latest bunch of people
that will either try to manage the river
for everyones benefit, or attempt to kill the
golden goose to appease the handful of river
area homeowners who marched us straight
into more than one losing lawsuit. Again,
we have to give major props to Council for
not putting Ken Valentine or a Norvell on the
committee, which consists of:
Darren Hill - General Manager, Schlitterbahn
Matthew Hoyt - Owner, Corner Tubes
Sarah Shea - Owner, The Other Place
Dick Hillyer - Retired
Roger Vann - Treasurer of Support the Ban
PAC
Scott Roots - Retired
One More to be Named by Parks & Recreation
Advisory Board
Wait a minute. Only Schlitterbahns Hill
and possibly Roots lack ties to Valentines
Kitchen Cabinet, and its drive to ban
disposable containers and large coolers and
all manner of things on local rivers. That ban
has since been shot down in court and is
currently under appeal by the City. Hoyts wife
is currently contemplating a lawsuit against
the County because she won an election she
was ineligible to run in. Hijinks and whatnot.
Yes, it appears were ###### again,
and good. At least 57 percent of that group,
(thats a majority, Canyon Lake readers), got
us onto the losing end of some expensive
litigation. Expect the City to lose more lawsuits
due to overreach.

County Throws Steak to

Watchdogs
Commissioners Court put an online survey
together that they said theyd like to have yall
fill out. Then it was gone. Disappeared into
the ether. They must have heard from enough
people to figure out what to do, or perhaps
it was backfiring with hilarious results. We
may be getting results soon, or not, or maybe
there was a tech problem and the survey will
be back online in the near future. In case
you want to keep clicking and see if it comes
TXCITIZEN.COM

back, try comalcountyforms.com/

CCCSurvey.htm or search around
for a link at mycomalcounty.com.
We dont really care
about the survey. What we
care about was the committee
formed to, according to
committee chair John Andrews,
in a statement made to the Houstonowned Herald-Zeitung, gauge public
preferences for receiving information about
county government. It included a variety of
locals, and a couple of people that should
have turned down the gig when it was offered
to them - KGNB News Director David Ferguson
and Herald-Zeitung Publisher Niece Bell.
I cant blame any politician for handing
out political appointments to newsroom chiefs,
because a large part of a politicians job is to
get close to the media and then manipulate it.
I do blame Bell and Ferguson for accepting the
positions. When one works in news, one takes
on the political role of government watchdog one doesnt become part of said government,
elected or appointed. Thats always been the
rule, and will continue to be in the rest of the
newsrooms in the western world, because
one cant serve two masters. In most places, a
body has to pick one job or the other, but hey,
this is Texas Most Corrupt City.
In other County news, chlamydia is still
the most popular non-flu illness afflicting
Comal County residents, according to Comal
County Public Health. I mean, with 169 cases
year-to-date, nothing else even comes close.

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Green vs CCFA
District One Councilman George Green has
filed his response to the allegations of ethics
violations leveled by the Comal County Fair
Association, and while Mr Green was good
enough to let us know the response had been
filed, he declined to provide us a copy, citing
advice of councel (sic) to have us request
it from the City, which could take up to two
weeks. Were not sure if he meant Council,
as in City Council, or counsel, as in the
lawyer that works for City Council, but thats
what we got. So now we wait for the City
Secretary to hand over the response. Well let
you know how that turns out.
\m/
Mike Reynolds
Publisher/Editor-in-Chief
3

FAKE NEWS
With Tony Bell

Rude Sausages

project. The ranch, according to its website,

The Wurstfest Association of New Braunfels has raises cattle, horses, chimeras, griffins and
apologized to visitors of this years event for the singing frogs, like the one in that cartoon. Man,
you know that dude in the cartoon was high.
sale of numerous naughty-shaped sausages.
Word-Borchers believes that its website
The sausages were sold from a booth run
was
also hacked.
by the Flashers Club of New Braunfels.
We thought it was some kind of
photography club, said association member NBISD Worried About
Hilmar Straus. I had three of the sausages New Texts
myself before I realized what they were.
The New Braunfels school district has doubts
The club had already sold out of the about the States new social studies and
rude sausages by the time the Wurstfest Stasi history texts.
ordered the booth closed.
We havent seen them yet, said one
The Associations attention was drawn school board member. But, were concerned
to the Flashers booth by the large crowd of about the veracity of some of the statements.
boisterous and aggressive elderly ladies who
Some of the more questionable items in
had conglomerated there.
the texts are (quotes are verbatim):
The only people who complained were
* The Americans were successful in their
the Opas, said Flashers Club President Seth revolution against Britain because God was
Raspy Smith. And I sold a lot of sausages solidly on the side of the colonists, while the
to them, too.
British Islamists were copulating with goats in
Smith said that the proceeds from the honor of Satan.
sales will go to pay for overcoats and legal
* Very few slaves were abused by their
fees for club members.
superior white masters. Those few beaten were

Veramendi Deadline
Extension

Planners for the Veramendi community will

have to extend a deadline with the City of
New Braunfels because the communitys
designers were stoned.
The group now has until May to file a
development agreement with the City. This is
the second extension for Veramendi.
We are really embarrassed about this,
said one of the communitys planners, who
spoke on condition of anonymity. My son and
his damn college friends hacked my computer
and changed everything.
We didnt notice the changes until one of
our engineers said he couldnt build roads out
of marshmallows, the source said.
The massive Veramendi community is
slated for construction on Loop 337, across
from New Braunfels High School.
Plans for the community call for:
* 5,000 houses that look like castles, but
are bigger on the inside than the outside, man.
* A bridge thats painted like a rainbow,
like the one to freaking Valhalla.
* A public park but instead of trees,
there will be a forest of weed.
* A school where people are cool,
you know.
* Oh, you know what would be really
cool? If, like, every street was a different world.
* A water park, except instead of water,
we use Jell-O. That would be so bad ass.
Word-Borchers Ranch is in charge of the
4

so because they refused to give up the Islamic

goat-copulating ways of their native Africa.
* That the United States was founded on
Biblical principals is proven by the fact that
Christ is mentioned 137 times in the Constitution.
(However, the actual text of the Constitution is
nowhere to be found in any of the books).
* The Native American tribes, who
preferred to be called injuns, could have
avoided their fate by simply converting from
Islam to worship the One True God.
* The coexistence of humans and
dinosaurs was an uneasy one.
* After emancipation, African-Americans
found that they missed slavery because, for the
first time, they could no longer rely on their
white betters to think for them.
* After slaughtering the Texans at the
Alamo, the Mexican Islamists raided the
compound and ate the dead. Afterward, they
copulated with goats.
The goat copulation references are
particularly disturbing, said the school board
member. The phrase is used more than 400
times in one text book alone.
However, the questionable references
are not the most troubling, according to the
board member.
The book never mentions President
Obama by name, the member said. They just
refer to him as the Negro President.
The books were compiled by self-taught
history experts appointed by the State Board
of Education.

KEEPIN' IT

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Emilys Elves Deliver the Goods!

Christmas can be an amazing time, replete

Two years ago, Emily started Emilys hangs on trees throughout town. On the back

I definitely try to get the children what

with good times and great memories. As Elves, a group dedicated to providing of each ornament are a childs list and his or

they want, so thats why I really appreciate

children, many of us can mark our Christmas

Christmas gifts to those children who would

the cash donations, she said. Last year, the

memories by what toys we got.

have nothing otherwise.

My favorite Christmas as a kid was the year

I got a GI Joe; an Evel Knievel (a horrendously

her clothing sizes.

Those who want to help, take the

night before delivery, we were in Walmart

Many of these kids dont get much of childs ornament off the tree and shop until 4 a.m. and spent more than $1,000,
anything all year, she said. When you go for that child. Afterward, the presents all donated money, buying gifts for the kids

can be dropped off at any business that whose ornaments were still on the trees. Then,
derby set (when the cars crashed, pieces flew seen, it takes your breath away that that kind carries Emilys trees, or at the old City Hall the next day, we were all day wrapping and
off); and a chemistry set (with which I failed in of thing is here in Comal County and so few downtown. You can also call Emily and distributing the gifts around town.
While the task is certainly a mammoth
numerous attempts to make stuff blow up, but people know about it.
shell come pick the presents up.
did make a strange purplish stain on the carpet
Right now, there are about 700 kids who
On Saturday, December 13, Emilys Elves one, Emily finds all the effort worth it when
loud thing that jumped over stuff); a demolition on the deliveries and youve seen what weve

that never came out).

dont have Christmas at all, Emily said. Last

So, I have had some great Christmas

memories.
But

for

many

others,

Christmas

is

heartbreaking. The holiday is time that is the

starkest reminder of how little they have.
Imagine being a parent and knowing you
cant afford anything for your kids.

will deliver the presents.

year, we provided for more than 200, and this

However, if you are unable to have the

year my goal is 400. Hopefully, next year, we

shopping done by the deadline, dont despair:

can get all 700.

Emily will continue taking the presents even

Emilys desire to help began at an early

age while watching her dad help others.

after the deadline.

Emily herself picks up any remaining

When I was younger, my dad and the ornaments not selected and goes Christmas
Downtown Rotary did something similar with shopping. This is so no child is left out.

Imagine being a kid and wondering

Thanksgiving baskets, she said. Seeing that

To ensure every child on the list has

how you could be so bad that Santa didnt

as a child made me realize there are other

a Christmas, cash donations are much

get you anything.

children who just dont get things like I did.

appreciated. Emily has set up a business

These arent morose platitudes. This is real

Today, Emilys father and his co-members account with Wells Fargo for Emilys Elves.

misery that is faced by real people every year.

of the Downtown Rotary help Emily Elves, And lest anyone have hesitations, Emily offers

Affection for ones children is not marked by giving $500 to the group last year.
economic boundaries.

Emilys Elves get a list of children who

absolute transparency.
I can show people their deposits and

children

see

the

presents

they

werent

expecting. A Christmas Day delivery last year

was particularly poignant for her.
I was doing a delivery alone on
Christmas Day, and the kids came running out
and the look on their faces were priceless, she
said. The parents were in shock, they could
barely speak they were so grateful. Afterward,
I called everybody, crying. Thats the best part
for me, is that you actually get to see the joy.
When you see the appreciation, it
makes you take a step back and realize what
you have and what you had as a child, and
why its so important to share that and pay it
forward, she said.

One of the Elves, Gillian Fowler,

where the money was spent, she said. concurred. Gillian volunteered last year
Comal County who are especially grateful to in New Braunfels, where parents fill out an Everything is accounted for. All of it, every with the help of her three daughters and
This is why there are many families in need help through the Family Life Center

Emily Coleman. Emily has dedicated herself

application to qualify for help. The child also

to alleviating mental anguish at a time of

writes down his or her wish list. Emily then

year where such pain is least avoidable and

takes the list and writes the childs name on a

single penny, gets spent on the gifts. The close family friend.
money is touched only one time a year.
The looks of pure happiness on the
For Emily and her Elves, the final days are kids and parents faces were amazing,

most unwelcome.

paper ornament shaped like an elf, which she

a whirlwind of activity.

she said. What Emily does to help these

AD SALES 830.358.2493

By Nick Rogers
families is just awesome. We cant wait to help out, Haley said. Its good for everyone
help again this year.
Going to deliver to the kids offers the
most satisfaction, added Emilys sister, Haley
Coleman. Because of this, I also get to see

in the community. Its not just us doing this, but

an entire community.
Emily

said

she

wants

people

to

remember their blessing so that they can

how unfortunate a lot of kids in this town are. empathize with those who have been
We tend to look past that sometimes.
The Elves also encourage those donating

forgotten by much of society.

I just tell people to think back to when you

to help deliver the gifts themselves, so they were a child, and Christmas Day came and
can see the joy on the faces of the children

you go what you wanted, she said. Think

they have helped.

about the whole experience, with family and

This year, Emily said there has been a big dinner and a warm house. Think about what
demand for bikes from boys. Last year, she you want your children to have. Then, think
said, now New Braunfels Mayor Baron Casteel

about these children who have none of that.

bought two bikes for children. She noted that

Think of those kids who have to go to school

they will be happy to accept donations of used

after the holidays and listen to everyone talk

bikes that are in good shape.

about what they got, but these children cant

This year, the girls seem to want items say anything because they didnt get anything.
related to the Disney movie Frozen.

We want to give them something to say.

While Emily wants every child to have

You can find Emily Elves trees at Crossroads

toys to play with, she also said there is a

Coffee Shop in downtown New Braunfels,

definite need for coats.

SmashBurger on Loop 337 near I-35, and

Last year, there were so many children Herberts Tacos on Walnut. Emily is currently
who were wearing tank tops in the freezing lining up other sites around town and in Gruene.
cold and with no heat in the house, she said.

You can contact Emily on her website,

Besides the toys, I want every kid to have a

EmilysElves.com, by email at EmilysElves@

coat. Last year, some of the kids wished for gmail.com, or on the groups Facebook page.
winter coats.
As many families are grateful to Emilys

You can also call 830.237.0039.

Every kid needs a good holiday and to

Elves, the Elves are grateful for the support believe in Santa and get gifts, sister Haley
they have received from the community.
Its really great when you get a whole

said. Any help, whether its a donation or just

spreading the word, is always welcome. We

town involved, and so many contribute and appreciate all of it.

TXCITIZEN.COM

UID
G
C
I
S
U
EM

V
YOUR LI
Thu 11.27

Fri 11.28

Adobe Verde

Adobe Verde

Closed

3 Man Front

6pm

6:30pm

Oma Gruenes Secret Garten

Closed

Phoenix Saloon

Black Whale Pub

TBA
8pm

TBA

The Happy Cow

5pm

Justin Reimer Band

8pm

Rileys Tavern
Open at 5pm

AJs Ale House

Rock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show
9pm

Gruene Hall
Closed

Oma Gruenes Secret Garten

Empty Handed Vagabonds

Rileys Tavern
Jason Eady

Scott Wiggins

9pm

8:30pm

Watering Hole Saloon

Zack Walther Band

8pm

7pm

AJs Ale House

Vineyard at Gruene

Rock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show

The New Vagabonds

9pm

7pm

Alpine Haus Restaurant

Off the Grid Polka Band
6pm

Billys Ice House

Pushwater

The Poor Jays

8pm

Phoenix Saloon

River Road Ice House

Whiskey Rodeo

6pm

7pm, Underground, $5

The Pour Haus

Gruene Hall
The Peterson Brothers

Sat 11.29
Adobe Verde
JJ Garrett Band
6:30pm

Black Whale Pub

Aaron Stephens
9pm

Junior Nash

1pm

5pm

Hayes Carll

Michael Kelton

Moonlight Social

w/ Graham Wilkinson

Landon Evans Band

8pm

9pm

7pm, $20

9pm

The Pour Haus

The Happy Cow

AD SALES 830.358.2493

Oma Gruenes Secret Garten

T-Bone & the Bluetones

MC & the Mystyx

4pm

6pm

Oma Gruenes Secret Garten

Phoenix Saloon
Mario Flores & the Soda Creek Band

Jumbofunk!
2pm

9pm

Phoenix Saloon

Rileys Tavern
Ruby Dee & the Snakehandlers
9pm

AJs Ale House

Rock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show

Adam Johnson
3pm

Slim Bawb
12:30pm

4pm

The Pour Haus

Flat Top Jones

Manzy Lowry

1pm

8pm

8pm, $35

NB Farm to Market
Monte Good
9am

The Pour Haus

Vineyard at Gruene
Sarah McSweeny
3pm

Mon 12.1

Songwriter Showcase

9:30pm

8pm

7pm

Kyle Reed Band

w/ Steven Roloff
8pm

Gruene Hall

Single Origin Espresso and Brews

Handcrafted Blends Whole Bean Coffee
Pastries Breakfast Tacos Free Wi-Fi
2348 Gruene Lake Dr. Suite B 830.643.1309

The Pour Haus

Open Mic w/ Jon Magill
8pm

River Road Ice House

Scott Morgan
7pm

Retail Wine Shop

Wine & Wine Tasting
Craft Beer on Tap
Live Music & Special Events

Wed 12.3
Phoenix Saloon
Shane Walker
8pm

Rileys Tavern

830.620.4404 vinoenverde.com
2351 Gruene Lake Dr

Tyler Cannon

Gruene Hall

D
ER

N
UE

GR

The Georges

Rileys Tavern
w/ John Whipple

Shawn Hart

Billys Ice House

9pm

Whiskey Rodeo

Vineyard at Gruene

8:30pm

6pm

Gruene Hall

The Gruene Grind Coffee Company is now

KennCentric Power Trio

7pm

8pm

w/ Seth Walker

Watering Hole Saloon

Drew Kennedy & Josh Grider

Midnight River Choir

Trombone Shorty

Tues 12.2

True Audio Outland

Chance Anderson

Gruene Hall

8pm

HU
NT
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The Happy Cow

1pm

Billys Ice House

The Pour Haus

TBA

Arms Length

9pm

Sun 11.30

Gruene Hall

6pm

337

Z
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LOCATED ON
GRUENE RD
BETWEEN
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The Pour Haus

TBA
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Vineyard at Gruene

Bret Graham

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6pm

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Fri 11.28
Cheatham Street Warehouse

diversions

Sat 11.29

Freiheit Country Store

Cheatham Street Warehouse

TBA

Doug Moreland

Karaoke

9pm

9pm

Friday Nights, 8pm

The Continental Club

The Continental Club

Club Lineup:

Club Lineup:

The Blues Specialists, 6:30pm

Redd Volkaert, 3:30pm

The Bluebonnets

Alejandro Escovedo

w/ Alejandro Escovedo

w/ The Greyhounds

10pm, $20

9pm, $10

Gallery Lineup:

Gallery Lineup:

Robert Kraft Trio, 8:30pm

Hillary York, 8:30pm

Mike Flanigin Trio, 10:30pm, $5

Mike Flanigin Trio, 10:30pm, $5

Cowboys Dancehall

Floores Country Store

Kevin Fowler

Corey Smith

7pm, 21+ $15, 18+ $25

w/ Mike Ryan

Floores Country Store

Cory Morrow

8pm, 18+ $15-$20

Luckenbach Dance Hall

w/ Sam Riggs

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11

MOST WANTED
BAIER,
ADAM SAMUEL

MIMS, STACY
WILLIAMS

Male 506 150 lbs

Male 511 175 lbs
DOB: 12/04/1971
DOB: 07/08/1968
CHARGE: Violations of
CHARGE: Failure to
conditions of probation
appear - theft
possession of
property
over $500
controlled substance
under $1500 enhanced
with intent to deliver

MEDELLIN, JESSE
BARKER,
RODRIGUEZ
TOM
EDWARD

NELSON,ALIX
ELIZABETH

Male 507 200 lbs

Male
511 185 lbs Female 502 122 lbs
DOB:01/01/1976
DOB:
12/17/1968
CHARGE: Possession
DOB: 04/26/1983
of a controlled
CHARGE:
Motion to
CHARGE:
substance
pg 1 under
revoke
probation
for
1
gram
and
theft
of
Possession
of a
assault bodily injury
property under $1500
controlled substance
family/
with 2 orhousehold
more
member
previous convictions

ED
T
S
E
R
AR

BORASH,
RICHEY, JEANNE
JORDAN RANDALL Female 506 150 lbs
Male 606 170 lbs
DOB: 04/02/1990
CHARGE: Failure to
appear - possession
of a controlled
substance

DOB: 05/08/1955
CHARGE: Motion to
revoke probation - theft
over $1500 under
$20,000 and bail
jumping and fail to
appear

LOYD,
JODI RAE

STUCK, JESSICA
LAUREN

D
E
T
S
E
R

AR

Female 511 280 lbs Female 505 125 lbs

DOB: 03/31/1981
DOB: 10/23/1990
CHARGE:
Possession of certain
CHARGE: Motion to
chemicals with intent
revoke probation to manufacture and
possession of a
multiple counts of
tampering with a
controlled substance
government record

LYNCH,
ALLAN LEE
Male 507 175 lbs
DOB: 12/18/1982
CHARGE: Failure to
comply with sex
offender registration
requirements

$300
REWARD

WHITE,
GLYN DANIEL
Male 606 214 lbs
DOB: 10/09/1968
CHARGE: Tamper/
fabricate physical
evidence and
possession of a
controlled substance

D
E
T
S
E
R

AR

FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO THE ARREST OF COMAL

COUNTYS MOST WANTED. Callers will remain anonymous.

830.620.3400 - 24-Hour
830.620.3411 - Mon-Fri 8am to 5pm

The names listed have been released in accordance with the Texas Public Information Act. This is a true
and accurate account as of Monday, November 17, 2014 at 11:40 AM and may not be current by the time
it is read. Do not try to apprehend anyone. These are listings of criminal warrants with the Comal County
Sheriffs Office and are not indicative of guilt or innocence. Officers are to verify the status of each warrant
prior to making an arrest. Any person is innocent of wrongdoing unless proven guilty in a court of law.

12

COMAL COUNTYS

ASK A MEXICAN!
By Gustavo Arellano

Sure, some local jurisdictions have tried

to play migra, or openly collaborate with

Dear Mexican: I was reading

the comments (BIG MISTAKE) on
an article I recently read regarding
St.
Charles,
Missouri
adopting
Arizona-style immigration Law. I was
SHOCKED at the amount of people
who support this law and my question
to you is: why cant people see the bad
implications of that law? What are we:
World War II Germany, where we need
to show our papers?
Im outraged that in this day and
age, there are so many folks racist
against Mexicans. Ive made people
very angry by standing against
the immigration law, or the racial
profiling of Mexicans. How is it that
people can stand against racially
profiling black Americans, and FULLY
support the profiling of Mexicans?
And they refuse to believe they are
racists. HELP MEplease give me a
good point of debate for these people
who honestly believe that show-meyour-paper laws are lawful.
Ive tried to make them understand
that STATE POLICE do not have
the legal right to be IMMIGRATION
POLICE. That argument does not work.
They say that I MUST be an illegal
immigrant or I am harboring one,
because I dont agree with the Arizona
law/racial profiling.
Necesito Ayuda en St. Louis
Dear I Need Help in St. Louis: Some
points to start. Until gabachos start forcing
all Mexicans to wear sombreros to more
easily identify them, its insulting to compare
any anti-Mexican laws to what Jews had
to endure in Nazi Germany. Simply put:

migrabut courts time and time again have

struck down such laws because Constitution.
Do these Know Nothings REALLY want to
expand federal powers? They always cry
no, but theyre more than happy if it means
harassing Mexicans. So once you get
them to admit that, just make the note that
theyre no better than Obamaand watch
them writhe like the culeros they are for
comparing them to a negrito.

Dear Mexican: Ive been dating a

Mexican man for a year now and am
madly in love, claro. His excuse for
everything is Im Mexicanwhich, as
you know, means that he works harder
than anyone else, has bigger balls than
any other male on the planet, and is so
virile he can impregnate a woman just
by blowing on her.
What I dont understand is that he
rarely uses my name and Ive noticed
that seems to be a Mexican thing. I love
being called chiquita bonita, but as far
as I know all of his friends are named
vato, puto, or gey. What gives? Also, he
has started calling me cabrona but hes
using it in a nice wayand Im confused.
Please help this loving gabachita to
understand her hombre.
Mamacita Chiquita Bonita
Dear Gabacha: Mexican men not
calling each other by their given name is a
working class trait, like the Southern son,
African-American man, and the bro bro.
The only Mexican twist we give to nicknames

deportation isnt genocide, no matter how

is calling people El (Insert Nickname)

much some yaktivists claim. Also, people

El Barbie, El Gordo, El Chiquidracula, El

who are opposed to racial profiling of

Kennedy, etc. But thats another question

one ethnicity tend to be opposed to racial and Im out of space for this semana!
profiling of EVERYONE, mostly because
racial profiling is a bola de mierda. Finally,
tell those Know Nothings you argue about
that the Constitution makes distinction
between state and federal powers, and only

Ask the Mexican at

themexican@askamexican.net,
be his fan on Facebook, follow him on
Twitter @gustavoarellano or follow him
on Instagram @gustavo_arellano!

the feds have authority over immigration.

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Last Word

BEST
OF THE
WURST

2014

With Kelly Colby

On Energy

that depends on the cheapest production of

more sophisticated products and by applying

Even with the trouncing he took during the energy, not one that is based on who has the robotics to the problem where we can, we
midterm elections, President Obama is in most political pull. If this type of reform was could recapture manufacturing in the country
a unique position to change the historical used with relaxation of other costly regulation, if energy costs allow it.
Lastly, all of this would improve our
perception of his presidency. Lets forget for a it should be possible to get everyone on
moment ideology. Its pretty clear that Obama

board. The removal of energy subsidies

national security. Many of our problems in the

is staunchly liberal, but there are some ways should be done for all industries. It would Middle East would be significantly improved
that he could get things done with the incoming mean some pain for solar and other alternative if we could limit oil incomes for antagonistic
Congress without completely compromising his

energies, but these industries dont appear to

countries and groups (Iran, Russia, ISIS, and

principles. If Obama could pick just one area be ready for prime-time anyway. It might also
where he agrees with Republicans, and resists be possible to leverage a new program for

I wouldnt be too sad to see Saudi Arabia

his base for the next two years, he could get

alternative energy with this that could help

funneled to terrorist organizations and used

solar and others develop more quickly.

to prop up dictators. The U.S. starting a

enough of the change he started out calling

for to turn our economy around and save his
legacy. Obama needs to work on energy with

take a hit). Far too much oil money has been

As opposed to throwing money in pieces production war would be an excellent way

and parts at alternative energy companies

to solve this problem. Oil producing countries

Republicans, and Im talking about more than that have government pull, the government would be forced to work within guidelines of
should offer a significant (billions) reward for the world market or find themselves in danger
just the Keystone pipeline.
Dont get me wrong, I think Obama the company that can provide a technology of bankruptcy. Imagine if Iran, in addition to

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should sign the Keystone bill when he gets it that makes some form of alternative energy facing economic sanctions as it already does,
(sometime after the new Congress convenes), competitive with current market prices. had to halve the price of their oil. My guess is

but Keystone isnt really the end to all our Several private organizations have tried this that we would see a popular revolution and exit
woes. Oil is a world market, so unlike what prize idea with significant success. Theres from their nuclear ambitions almost overnight.
the Obama has said in the past, it probably no particular reason why it wouldnt work
will affect American gas prices, but it probably with the government offering the prize money.

If

President

Obama

followed

this

roadmap and was careful in his negotiations,

wont do so to any significant extent. The Obama could even insist that the energy he might make more gains with a Republican
oil will be getting to market one way or the be one that is carbon neutral. This should Congress than he did with a Democrat one.
other, though, and theres no reason why we appease his base and help him assuage the
fears of climate change crazies.
shouldnt get some benefit from that.
The real benefit would be from Obama
relaxing energy regulation or allowing it to

He could work with Republicans to keep his

Affordable Care Act in place, perhaps with

So, how would this help the country and

some revisions, but in a way that would

Obamas legacy? Well, the first way it would

address his concerns about coverage (I would

be relaxed, at least. For the first time in many do so is to create jobs. States like North Dakota probably still hate it, but this is Obamas day
years the U.S. has outpaced Saudi Arabia in oil and Texas have already seen fracking create in the sun, not mine). He could forward the
production. This is thanks primarily to fracking an employment boom in some areas. These development of alternative energy in a way
technology, and we need to do everything we are good, high-paying jobs in some cases, that works. He might even create a situation
can to keep that trend going. This may not
be as easy as it sounds because fracking is

so good that local economies have been

where we could replace fossil fuels in the

strangely skewed. Dropping the unemployment long run. He could distract Republicans from

currently in danger because of its own success. rate and increasing the participation rate in the legislation that he would find objectionable
Fracking is a relatively expensive process. workforce would go a long way to improving by willingly working with them on common
Because of this, it is only viable at the moment the economy. And, if these jobs can be made
if gas prices (both gasoline and natural gas) more secure by keeping fracking a viable

goals, and in cases where that didnt work,

he would always have his veto pen.

Like Rush Limbaugh, I have always

stay high. Unfortunately, the increase of operation, that is all the better.
A
second
benefit
would
be
a
direct
bump
been
someone rooting for Obama to fail,
production from the U.S. has begun to bring
gas prices down. Saudi Arabia is also ramping

keep the viability of fracking going.

driving innovation and economic progress

turn in this direction, all that would change

is the availability of cheap energy. This is

for me (I cant speak for Rush). I would

Im not talking about subsidizing oil particularly important in the manufacturing be happy to see the President succeed if
companies. In fact, quite the opposite might sector. There has been a good deal of those successes would actually benefit the
be the first thing that can be done to help.
Republicans could probably be moved to cut

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to the nations economy. Lower energy prices not because I hate him unreasonably, but

production up to limit the profitability of fracking will spur economic growth; it always has. because I think his ideas are dangerous to
in America. If the government can find ways to Perhaps the single most important factor in the health of the nation. If Obama could
cut out costly regulation in these areas, we can

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talk about how we have moved past a

country in the long term.

manufacturing economy, but this doesnt have

out real government largess to oil companies to be the case. Certainly, there are types of
if the same is done for energy across the manufacturing that we will be priced out of

board. We need to have an energy market because of wages, but by manufacturing

TXCITIZEN.COM

You can read more from Kelly Colby at yourfirstshrug.

blogspot.com.

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