Planet Nilknarf

January 2015
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!

Cover Story

Predict......WILL this latest panel be finished by the time this issue comes out!!!

And the answer is obviously a resounding YESSSSSSS!!!!

Welcome to the Anti-Cosmo

Celebrating Granny Panties and Birkenstocks in Thong and Stiletto World!!!
I already know that next September the National Carousel Association's annual convention will take
place in Virginia and Maryland. I also know that the one the year after that will take place in OHIO!!!
That's the one Janette will be going to with me as Ohio is already familiar to me because of two
previous conventions; my first one in 1991, and the 2009 Technical Conference. Highlights of the Ohio
convention include the PTC carousel from Euclid Beach and THIS exciting new gem:
http://www.local12.com/news/features/top-stories/stories/carol-anns-carousel-building-banks-carousel21161.shtml
And, of course, this is the Euclid Beach carousel that we've also been so excited about:
http://www.wkyc.com/story/news/local/northeast-ohio/2014/11/23/euclid-beach-carousel-ridesagain/19446199/
I saw horses from the Euclid Beach carousel on display at the Sandusky Merry-Go-Round museum
when I was there in 2009 but my pictures didn't turn out because I kept forgetting to turn on the flash
on that stupid, archaic 35 mm camera I had to buy to replace the one that broke on that particular trip!
I want to ride that tall, white one with the flowers. I just hope I don't fall getting off.
Okay, so why did I refer to Planet Nilknarf as the Anti-Cosmo? Probably because it is unlike most
magazines we are used to. Cosomo broke ground in the 60's or whenever it was because it told
women that it wasokay to enjoy sex outside of marriage. I'm not saying that it isn't. It still is. But it's
also okay NOT to be involved in a relationship. Easy for me to say because I've been happily married
for a dozen years. But sex is NOT the most important thing in my life. And I'm okay with that. And it's
okay to be okay with that. Year after year I have found myself gazing at the covers of magazines at the
checkout counters and year after year the messages they keep sending women are always the same;
Your ultimate goal in life is to bust your ass trying to look good in a bikini and when you finally do
succeed (that is IF you finally do succeed) then ruin it all, once you've reeled in your Mr. Right, by

having a baby!! The world has been doing this for thousands of years WITHOUT the help of an
instruction manual. I'm not against having kids. I'm just saying that it's not for everyone. I've just
noticed that when we look at the majority of magazine covers they're almost always about diets and/or
pregnancies. Sometimes I feel like I just want to trash the magazine rack like the Incredible Hulk.
When I feel like that I usually wait for my husband outside until he's done at the checkout counter.
However, I admit I had to gloat over a couple of recent covers where one of them said Kim, pregnant
and DUMPED by her boyfriend. and another about some other celebrity couple who are trying t save
their marriage by having a baby. That makes about as much sense as cutting the cord to make
bungee jumping safer. If your marriage sucked in the first place, bringing a screaming shit factory into
the picture is only going to create a whole new set of problems.
Of course, not all people think the way I do. You're either hard-wired to be a parent or you're not. And if
you're not, it should be nothing to be ashamed of.
Here at Planet Nilknarf we celebrate the non-conformist, the misfit, the under-achiever, and the person
who accepts his or her limitations. Not everyone is good at everything. We're all about not trying to be
something you're not. And making the best of what you DO have!!! And above all, we celebrate the
SURVIVOR!!!

20 years ago at this time, Janette and I were living in Toronto unemployed and barely surviving, being
cheated out of whatever little money we did have by an unscrupulous talent agency who pretended to
believe in us and promised us fame. Even the women in our church group were telling us by now to
throw in the towel, admit defeat and move back to Lindsay!!! More often than not we didn't know
where our next meal was coming from or how we'd pay the rent. We bombed at going from door-todoor to promote Unitel long-distance phone plans. I quit after the first night. Janette plugged away and
managed to make the required seven closings but never got paid!
When things finally started falling into place I got a job at an industrial cafeteria and Janette was hired
by CDS. Unfortunately it was just a trial and she was laid off two weeks later. Working for the cafeteria
was the longest 3 weeks of my life. I had to get up at 3:30 in the morning and walk all the way from
Bayview and Cummer to Victoria Park and McNIcholl to be there for 6:00 because the buses weren't
running that early. One of the best things about that job was that I was allowed to bring home much of
the leftovers to keep us fed.

And during the time Janette was laid off she found the doll-making job. At the time the boss was
looking for two new workers, so Janette recommended me for the position and I came in and showed
her what I could do. I also brought the Boy George doll to show her. And that's where I stayed for the
next eight years.
In the month or two to follow Janette became very ill with pneumonia. She called her dad to have him
and Anita look after her while she was sick but they brought her back too soon and I was worn out
between trying to look after her and my boss during her first Annual Drunken Binge. This became a
regular occurrence, usually after a big event, and usually lasted at least a week or two while all
production ground to a halt! I'm serious, if it wasn't for me, my boss' house probably would have
burned down because often during these episodes she would leave something to cook on the stove
and forget all about it.
Working for my former boss was like working for two different people. Often she was nice to me and
took good care of me. Sometimes when I had to work late she'd cook us supper. It was like having a
second mom. Three moms if you count my former landlady, Ruth, but that's a different story.
But she had a horrendous temper and sometimes working for her could be downright scary. I swear I'd
be rich if I had a nickel for every breakfast I lost on the sidewalk on my way to work worrying about
what kind of mood my former boss might be in.
And, of course, it was worse when there was a man in my life.
I can honestly say it's a miracle I've survived all the drama that took place during the eight years I held
that job. But if Dave hadn't come into my life when he did I doubt very much I'd be alive to write this.
Ever since I was evicted from the basement apartment at Ruth's place, my boss' verbal abuse just
kept getting worse and worse and on the pathetic wages I earned I really couldn't have afforded that
last apartment on my own. I just barely made the rent and while Dave was dating me he helped with
my utilities. The whole experience feels like a different lifetime.
And during the first six months of my marriage, the majority of my wages were spent on transportation
getting to and from work between Oshawa and Toronto. The Go Train was a regular cesspool of germs
and I caught every bug that went around. While the journey took its toll on my physical health, my
boss' verbal abuse took its toll on my mental and emotional health.
Okay, on a lighter note I would like to share the following video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GAZe-scjjyU
Can't go wrong with Minions, eh?! I can hardly wait to see their new movie but it won't be out until the
SUMMER!!!!
Not only that but here's something else I really like. Go figure, my hubby and I watch this show all the
time but I've NEVER seen this segment before!!! I'd like to thank Richard for finding this and posting it
in the NCA Facebook page:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4ajpNJbVaI&feature=youtu.be

Carousel of the Month

Nunley's, Museum Row, New York

Nunley's carousel at Museum Row in Garden City, New York. It was built between 1910 and 1912, a
Murphy/Stein & Goldstein wit 30 jumping horses, 11 standers and one lion. Most of the horses are
Stein & Goldstein but there are also a few Dentzels and Illions. This carousel got its start at Canarsie,
Brooklyn from 1912 to 1939 and then at Nunley's Amusement Park from 1939 until 1995. This
carousel is special to me because I've had the pleasure (?) of riding it in both its previous and new
location. I rode this carousel at Nunley's in Baldwin when I visited New York in 1993 and the picture of
me riding Rosebud became my official logo!

This image appears on both my business card and the final square of my First Quilt. I regret that I've
been unable to find a copy of the original photo, outside of my scrapbook which is too big and bulky to
place upon my scanner!!
Here is that horse in 1993 and today...

1993 and now! Notice how the garish florescent tube lights have been replaced by dainty little bulbs.
Before restoration all the horses on Nunley's carousel were either white or dapple gray.
This was the carousel where, sadly, pride literally came before a fall. There I was showing everybody
my business card and hoping so badly that I could ride Rosebud once again so I could re-enact that
particular picture. I learned the hard way NEVER to call dibs on a carousel horse. It SO invokes bad
karma!!! Somebody else took that horse, f course, and I don't blame her if she hates me forever for
asking if she could change her mind. I don't blame her. Once I get on ANY horse, NOBODY can talk
me into getting off and choosing another mount. WTF was I thinking, selfish bitch that I am. I ended up
on a large, black outside row horse further down on the platform. I'm not even sure if I have a picture

of that one. I think he might have been offended because he KNEW I'd had my heart set on another
horse in the first place so when the ride was over he was stopped in the up position as high as
horsedly possible and when I tried to get off my foot must have been at least a foot above the floor
and from that horrendous moment on everything seemed to happen in slow motion. My hat went
flying, my sunglasses went flying and I just went WHAM!!! Flat on my back!!! I probably would have
been hurt a lot worse if I didn't have my backpack on!!!! It was one of the Worst Moments of my life as
I hit the ground and roared out a resounding F-bomb!!!!
Still, I decided I wanted a second ride. Preferably one where I don't make such a violent departure.
Jerry Horrowitz kind of yelled at me for lining up when I'd already had a ride. HELLO??? The lineup
was excruciatingly LONG ENOUGH that anyone who hasn't had their first ride yet was already WAY
AHEAD of me!!!! Fortunately, others sided with me and let me stay in line and I settled for a humble
little brown stander in the second row, in kind of a somber mood, not really enjoying my ride.
It's possible I was feeling weak and clumsy after a horrible sleepless night being sick the night
before!!! :(
I hope that someday there will be another chance to go to Nunley's when I'm feeling better and I
actually CAN ride Rosebud again. But at least if that never happens,I'm glad I had the chance to ride
her 20 years ago.
Here are more pictures from Nunley's carousel:

Back when I first rode Nunley's in 1993 I also rode this one on the right with all these magnificent
tassels and jingle-bells!! Back then, this horse was white instead of dark brown.

Back then I also rode this black one too. It was still black back then but the feathers were red and
yellow and the mane was white.

The NCA official Photo Show of this carousel can be seen here:
http://carousels.org/psp/Nunleys/

5th Annual Autistic Artistic Carnival

I had almost totally forgotten all about this event. Keep scrolling down and you will find some familiar
sights:
http://drivemomcrazy.com/autistic-artistic-carnival-info/5th-annual-autistic-artistic-carnival-2014/
I actually came across this link when a meme in Facebook said to Google my first name in Google
images. The selection of images just for my first name was kind of boring so I Googled both my first
and last and came across a number of familiar sights.

Another Link Worth Sharing:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/karen-mangiacotti/women-without-kids-pressurechildfree_b_6121432.html?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000063

20 Creepiest Toys of All Time:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yHjCerAYnKg

Euclid Beach Carousel

One of the best articles I've seen about this place so far!
http://www.themeparkreview.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=69504

Beetlebomb's Book Nook

I would like to introduce this month's literary picks by sharing a rather amusing blast from the past
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DTD3EBtf_MI
This month I have chosen the following books to review:

In keeping with the theme of our Carousel of the Month, Do You Want to Know A Secret by Andrea
Bejarano with illustrations by Jade Chan is a delightful and beautifully illustrated childrens' storybook
about a little girl named Andee and her friendship with Rosebud, our beloved horse from Nunley's
carousel pictured earlier in this month's issue.
Andee looks forward to Magic Saturday, the day when she gets to ride her favorite carousel horse.
Unfortunately she is sent home from school with severe stomach pains and has to go to the hospital
for an emergency appendectomy.
Andee is very sad because she misses her chance to ride Rosebud. But when she can't come to the
magic, the magic comes to her...!!!
I bought this book at the Nunley's carousel, from the author herself who autographed it for me! A
treasure to be enjoyed by all ages, just like the carousel horse that inpsired this tale in the first place!
Hardwiring Happiness by Rick Hanson, PhD, is a book I've spent many months reading. I forget
whether I got it for my birthday or last Christmas but it was one of those books I couldn't rush. For me
it had to be slowly savored to let the ideas sink in. This has been a book I'd wanted ever since hearing
the author being interviewed about it on CBC radio. He tells us that our brains tend to be more likely to
remember negative things because it is part of our survival instinct. We live in a negative world where
a lot of shit happens all too often. We need positive thoughts and experiences to balance out the bad
ones. Or rather, we need to train our brains to hold onto these positive thoughts and experiences more
tightly to comfort and empower ourselves. This book explains how. It takes practice, but it can be
done.
From my own experiences, I can draw upon some of the amazing times Janette and I had back in the
summer when we went to Guelph. It was one of the most beautiful, peaceful places we've ever visited,
especially the nature trail by the river. Those days in Guelph were like a healing retreat for us. It was
like travelling back in time. There were no screaming brats in the stores or restaurants and we could
ride the carousel pretty much whenever we wanted.
New York, on the other hand, was full of more than its fair share of unwanted drama. But I can take
comfort in remembering some of the best moments such as riding the Ferris Wheel at Toys R Us and
how everyone was raving about the quilt I contributed to the auction.

This book tells us how to focus on those times when we've enjoyed feeling peaceful, loved and
cherished or accomplished something we're especially proud of.
Last but not least Boy George, by Merle Ginsberg, has probably been out of print for years. I was still
in college when I bought this book at the height of Boy George's career, when things were still going
well for him, before drugs and other problems got in the way. I'm not sure how this book turned up
recently and ended up in my possession because I've had so many other books that have
disappeared over the years. No doubt, Jean loaded up tons of books in boxes from every room in the
house when we were clearing out my mom's estate after she passed away and I never thought to go
through them because everything just had to go-go-go and FAST!!! Because now I am kicking myself
because among the books that have been rushed away there was probably my long-lost copy of
When Cameras Go Crazy which I wasn't even thinking about at the time!!!
When I was in college my fellow KISS fans started getting angry with me because I was losing interest
in KISS and becoming interested in Culture Club. In fact it seemed as though many would have
wanted to crucify me just for mentioning Boy George/Culture Club and KISS in the same sentence.
But Boy George was one of the few things that helped me survive college because he captured my
imagination by daring to be different. I got a kick out of his wit and attitude, not to mention the music of
Culture Club. It was the song Karma Chameleon that got me hooked.
Janette too. We had some pretty awesome times in those days just hanging out listening to the music
of Culture Club and they were the first band we saw together in concert at Maple Leaf Gardens in
November of 1984. I remember how hard it was to get tickets. Dad drove me to Toronto and I stood in
line all day only to end up not buying any tickets because all that was left were seats way up in the
grays and even though it wasn't yet announced to the public, the fan club newsletter said there would
be a second show.
Well, we were able to order tickets to the second show by phone but they were way up in the green
section. Not quite as bad as the grays, but penultimate as far as view quantities go. Janette's uncle
was actually able to get us seats way down in the GOLD!!
But enough about my own experience. This book talks about GEORGE'S experience!! Boy George
came from a large family with two older brothers, two younger brothers and one sister, Siobhain
(pronounced Shi-vaahn). Even though he was very bright and intelligent, he hated school and balked
at traditional employment. Before Culture Club he found his niche working in clothing stores and going
to clubs where his image was appreciated. And before Culture Club he was part of a band called Bow
Wow Wow for awhile.
This book was released in the spring of 1984 and it was in November of that year we went to their
show, which was also the time when culture club's album Waking Up With the House on Fire was
released along with its first single, The War Song. It was back during the summer of that year the
movie Electric Dreams came out with two of Culture Club's songs on its soundtrack, Love is Love
and The Dream. The book mentions three songs, but Hello Goodbye wasn't used in the movie.
However it did make it onto Waking Up With the House on Fire.

Distillery District Christmas Market

On Saturday, December 13th, Janette and I made arrangements to meet up at Union Station and go to
the Christmas Market at the Distillery District in Toronto. We'd been looking forward to this for weeks! It
was a dark and dreary morning but I was well awake before the alarm had a chance to go off. I ate my
usual breakfast of oatmeal with fruit and coffee while I listened to CBC radio feeling worried and
discouraged because the weather reports kept meowing about FREEZING RAIN!!! NO! NO! NO! WE
DON'T WANT FREEZING RAIN!!

I was already dressed in black track pants with my multicoloured tie-dye T-shirt from the Bronx zoo
and my ever-present KISS hoodie from Niagara. Waddle and the dolls were in my backpack. I also
packed my latest embroidery project and donned my Technicolour Dream Coat with my leopard scarf
and Santa hat. It was still quite dull and gray out when I left the house but at least it was finally
daylight. Yesterday morning felt like it was never going to lighten up!!
I made my way across the Oshawa Centre parking lot and waited at the corner across the street from
the Keg restaurant. Finally the bus came and it was one of those new double-decker Go buses. But I
was travelling such a short distance I couldn't be bothered to sit upstairs.
The nice thing about travelling this early in the morning on a Saturday is there's hardly anybody on the
train at that time of day. It was a peaceful, quiet journey and I got some embroidery done en route.
As I neared the Distillery District, I took out my camera and started to record. I hoped to capture my
first glimpse of the carousel on video...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nuKzPIThisg
The first thing I did once I arrived at Union was have to use the ladies' room. I was quietly singing to
myself as I entered the stall. Margaret! Is that you? Janette's voice rang from the stall next to me!
She'd already gone in unbeknownst to me so we had a bit of a chuckle.
We decided to take a taxi to get to the Distillery District. There was a white cab on the corner but when
we hailed him and told him where we wanted to go he shouted NO! NO! NO! and took off!! WTF was
his problem? Fortunately, there was a green-and-orange Beck cab not far behind him and the driver
gladly took us there. He said that the previous driver probably couldn't be bothered to take us such a
short distance. Hello? It was a good ten-dollar trip, just that bit too far for us to have walked there. It
probably would have taken us at least a good half hour or more.
Once we arrived at the Distillery District, I took several pictures of the carousel.

The ticket booth wasn't open yet so we decided to check out the market. Most of it wasn't much to
write home about because everything was so expensive and Janette was getting irritable because
there were so many baby strollers everywhere! She dislikes them even more than I do!
We were both feeling hungry so we treated ourselves to gingerbread men at a German bakery kiosk. I
also bought a bag of chocolate-covered gingerbread to take home and share with my hubby.

There were many colourful displays but nothing we felt like we really HAD to have. We were glad to
get back to the carousel. Rides were $4.50 reach! A bit steep, but that didn't stop them from doing

excellent business. The ride was packed each time! Best of all adults ARE allowed to ride. I was a little
worried because it was kind of a dangly carousel. The platform shook like a bowl of jelly as we tried
to mount our horses. I chose one in the middle because it was close to the ground and Janette chose
one on the inside row but the operator made her move to the outside row because the inside row
horses are only for children. The outside row horse was in the up position, but I managed to hold it
steady while she hoisted herself into the saddle. Soon the bell rang and we enjoyed an excellent ride!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gxnhCczJ4lo
I got the lady in front of us to take our picture before we got off:

We enjoyed our ride so much we went and got tickets for a SECOND ride! I took footage of the
carousel in motion while we waited in line:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Pot9MJUq3Y
This time Janette chose the chariot and I chose a big horse with blue trappings right behind her.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWQ4a6JDRIg

It was easy for me to take a picture of her from where I was sitting but she had to get off to take mine.

By then we had had our fill of the Christmas Market and were ready to leave. We took a quiet route
and visited a couple art galleries.
By then we were also getting quite hungry but there weren't any restaurants in the area. However,
there was an interesting Dollar Store just down the street that we just had to check out. I was a little
disappointed with the lack of craft supplies but I did find some tasty goodies to bring home to share
with my hubby including these interesting chocolate milk straws. I'll tell more abut those later. I also
found pistachio nuts and cashews, spearmint leaves (his favorite!) and licorice all-sorts (mine!) and
these chocolate spoons. And I treated Janette and I both to these Lisa Frank stationery sets! I love
Lisa Frank stuff! All those colourful stickers! I've always been a sucker for rainbows and unicorns and
all that sort of thing.
We decided to skip St. Lawrence Market. The place would have been a ZOO that day!! And it was! It
looked pretty busy there as we rode past it in our second taxi that day. We got the cab to take us to
Lone Star Texas Grill. I loved this place when Dave and I went there on our anniversary at least a year
or two ago. I was disappointed that they no longer have the popcorn shrimp fajitas I enjoyed so much
last time I was there but we both really enjoyed the Big Rig Burrito, served with refried beans, ride,
chopped tomato and sour cream!! And I indulged in a Margarita. This place makes one of the best
Margaritas I've ever had!! The day was still plenty young and it was so nice to NOT have to hurry!! So
we ended up indulging in dessert too. We both had the Texas Fried ice cream. It was amazing!!! I
loved the chewy coconut-cornflake crust!! It was served with whipped cream and chocolate sauce.
Another thing I like about this place is that we could sit in a comfy booth in the BAR. I had no idea until
I had to use the washroom that this place is HUGE! But I'm glad we did NOT eat in the dining room.
Since we arrived, at least TWO people arrived with baby strollers and they wheeled into the dining
room. The music in the bar is uncomfortably loud at first but I'd rather be hearing that than what we
would have heard in the dining room!
After lunch we walked up to Queen Street in search of that cool place we used to love with all that
glittery jewelery but we were heartbroken to discover to our horror that this place does not exist
anymore. It used to be a wonderful place for buttons and patches too. In fact this was the place where
Dave had bought me that Tigger patch that I used to mend my Technicolour Dream Coat. The very first
of many.
All the places we used to love are disappearing! I remarked sadly. At that moment both of us had a
feeling of deja-vu.
We were both getting tired and our feet were hurting. Winter boots, go figure. They're so heavy and
my socks were bunching up. It was at that point we decided it was time to go home and made our way
to Osgoode Subway station. I got out at Union and Janette continued her journey around the loop to
Finch.
I'd just missed the latest train, so I had some time to kill. I was delighted to discover FOUR Archie
Christmas digests available for sale in that little corner store at Union so I bought them all.
It wasn't long until the sign that listed the departures already said Proceed to Platform 27 so I made
my way upstairs to the train platform. I was doing well for time. It wasn't even 3:00 yet. Still daylight.
Shortly after the train pulled out of the station I shot some more video footage in hopes of catching one
last look at the carousel:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LQlteXh50Xc

There was a moment when I dropped my backpack and fumbled around to put it back in my seat.
It was still daylight when I arrived back in Oshawa and I decided the best choice would be to take the
Park bus home from the Go Station. If I took the Go bus I would still have that long walk across the
parking lot. I was down to my last $20 bill which I did SO NOT want to spend on a cab even if it would
have brought me to my door. The Park bus took me straight to the bus loop in front of the Oshawa
Centre which is just a short walk to my place.
When I got home it was around 4:00 and I was ready for a darned good nap. I must have snoozed
until at least 7:30. I did not want supper that evening because I was still full from lunch at Lone Star.

New Year's Resolutions

With the holiday season upon us, it's only logical to discuss the subject of New Year's resolutions. So
far I have made only two:
1. I am NOT buying anything else with my Visa card until I've PAID IT ALL OFF!!! There is only
ONE exception and that is if Culture Club reschedules their tour once Boy George has
recovered from his throat surgery and is feeling better. That probably won't happen until at
LEAST the spring!!
2. I REFUSE to start any NEW creative projects until I finish the unfinished projects I already
have on the go. There is ONE exception and that is if, before these are done somebody else
gives me a COMMISSIONED ASSIGNMENT!!!!
However I have already cheated and broken one of these resolutions. Look at it this way. It's NOT
2015 just yet!! Still, no excuses. This is the LAST thing I buy until I pay off unless...yadayadayada..
Seriously, I just HAD to order a copy of the new BERKSHIRE CAROUSEL COLOURING BOOK!!!
And here's where you can buy your OWN copy!!
www.berkshirecarousel.com
I'm afraid I had to do this by hand because once again my stupid computer is giving me attitude and
refusing to let me copy and paste links. I hate it when it does that.
Speaking of unfinished projects, predict; Will this be finished by Christmas?

Seriously, there MUST be something more to life these days besides binge-watching episodes of Ugly
Betty on DVD while I push myself to finish this penultimate panel!
A radical new idea came to me while I was watching the show but I don't want to talk about it too much
for fear of jinxing it. So far the only person who knows is Janette and some people I mentioned it to on
Facebook in one of the Asperger groups. I have to wait and see if this idea comes to pass because I
need to see if the means of achieving my goal are legit. Besides most people who know me probably
wouldn't understand. I know my husband and in-laws probably wouldn't and many people would
probably think I'm the wrong sort of person for this career choice. I know I can be a real potty-mouth
sometimes, I tend to drink every now and then and I've been accused of being spiritually low.
Besides, whoever heard of an ORDAINED MINISTER with purple hair and tattoos! THERE!!! I've said
it! I'm thinking of becoming an ordained minister! Who says I have to have my own church and preach
sermons every Sunday? I just think it would be cool to have the authority to be able to perform
wedding and baptism services and host a small, but most importantly sensory-friendly, prayer group
for people like myself who have become uncomfortable and dissatisfied with most conventional church
services.
So far this is just an idea. I am praying for direction from God and some sort of sign if this is what I'm
meant to do because I am aware of the fact that over the years I've been a judgmental hypocrite
myself. People need to know that God LOVES them and FORGIVES them. Not enough has been said
about that in churches in recent year. I admit I've held my share of grudges. But seriously all we ever
hear about most of the time is serve, serve, serve, give, give, give, sacrifice, sacrifice, sacrifice!!! What
if you're feeling so drained and tapped out of your own energy and resources that you feel like you've
got nothing left to give?
People need to know that not only are they unconditionally loved, but that God gives them what they
need to get through life one day at a time and that He has wonderful plans for us. I admit I've had my
share of struggles believing that for myself, but perhaps we can relate to one another better if we
realize we are all in this together.
As an ordained minister, not only would I have the authority to perform weddings and baptisms

(preferably adult, NOT infant) but I would also be interested in performing counseling. Maybe I should
take a psychology course.
I am OKAY with performing gay weddings.
I am NOT okay with performing weddings where the bride-to-be oopses her groom. That is she traps
him into marrying her by getting pregnant. Marriages like that can only end in disaster. If you want a
shotgun wedding, DON'T come to me.
And I will NOT perform a wedding service if the groom happens to be my ex. It's NOT because if I
can't have him nobody else can. It is for the bride's own good. Seriously, this guy is a Bad Seed! He's
nothing but trouble and has left a trail of carnage in his wake. I am just one of may lives he has ruined
and I REFUSE to let that happen to anyone else.
I realize I may have backslidden in recent years. But remember, you read it here first. Anyone can
register online but it does cost a certain amount of money. Remember what I said about my New
Year's Resolution and my Visa Bill. Just keep me in your prayers and help me make the right
decision. I need to know how I will break this to my family when the time comes. There are people who
think I'm still too much of an immature kid, too eccentric, too unconventional, to pull this sort of thing
off!!

Carousel of Friendship
Not much has been done regarding the carousel lately but I am this close to finishing Jan and Fede's
housewarming quilt...

Predict: Will it be completed by the time I finish NEXT MONTH'S issue?

One Last Resolution

I've made one more resolution after all. However, keeping it won't be easy. I've resolved to try to stop
swearing. Or at least not swear as much. However, I'm afraid even my COMPUTER laughs at me
when I use expressions such as For PRUNES sake!
And, of course there tend to be extenuating circumstances when it's impossible NOT to swear. For me
these are the following:
1. Sometimes when I'm drifting off to sleep, or when I already AM asleep, I tend to accidentally
and painfully bite my tongue!!! I can go for MONTHS without this happened and then it will
happen to me several times in one week, or even worse, several times in one night, in which
case it makes me too angry to fall back to sleep!! It tends to be an automatic knee-jerk reaction

to spew out an F-bomb when this happens. Usually I sleep alone but on different occasions
Janette, and once Richard, have the misfortune of being in the room when it happened. My
apologies for having scared the crap out of either of them. You may wonder; I'm a married
woman. What was Richard doing in the same room while I was sleeping? Just surfing the net
on his laptop, that's all. We shared a suite where we had separate rooms. I let him have the
master bedroom while I slept on the pull-out couch in the living room area. But the master
bedroom has no computer access, of course. Anyway, I'm starting to ramble here.
2. The sound of screaming babies! I automatically tend to roar SHUT THE FUCK UP! when I'm
fumbling around for the remote. Usually I mute entire commercial breaks as a precaution but
when there haven't been any commercials featuring screaming babies in awhile I am lulled into
a sense of false security and caught off guard.
3. FALLING!!! Usually when I slip on ice, of course, but also when I've fallen trying to get down
from exceptionally high carousel horses like what happened TWICE during this year's NCA
convention!!

Dear Mom and Dad

Friday, December 26th
Dear Mom and Dad,
I will try to keep this short because I have a ton of dishes to wash before Dave gets home and we are
going out for dinner at Swiss Chalet with his dad and Marnie tonight.
I hope you had a Merry Christmas up in heaven. How's the celebration there? I remember a Monty
Python movie that made it look like EVERY day is Christmas up in heaven. What I've heard is that
there is no time up there. Or more that we're not limited by the constraints of time as we are here. Kind
of hard to explain to my readers but you probably know what I'm talking about because you are there
and you can basically do whatever you want whenever you want and not have to worry about being
late for anything or missing anything. You also don't need to eat, sleep or go to the bathroom anymore.
Sure enough you probably do get to eat anyway. I can't imagine Heaven without good food and I've
heard accounts that claim when you pull a piece of fruit off a tree another one automatically grows in
its place.
Dave and I have had a quiet Christmas. My gifts to him seem kind of lame compared to how he
spoiled me!! I got him $50 gift cards for both Chapters and HMV and a Batman pen. But it turned out
to be no ordinary Batman pen. I didn't know until I wrapped it that it was also a FLASHLIGHT with the
BAT SIGNAL!!! I was delighted! How often does somebody buy a gift for someone and discover that
it's even better than they thought?
Dave gave me a $50 gift card for Chapters too, along with both Despicable Me movies and the
complete series of Gilmore Girls on DVD!
He also inadvertently gave me this Heavy Metal Book of Lists that was so full of creepy, Satanic stuff
that I HAD to get rid of it!!! I literally FELT SICK reading it!!! There was even a section on variations of
the Knights in Satan's Service rumor!! KISS has actually spoken out against this idea many times
and I've defended them on it too when that woman wrote that nasty letter to the paper back when I
was in college, remember. Back then I made so many photocopies of my rebuttal.
In that book I also found out that Eric Carr isn't the only former member of KISS who's dead but so is
Mark St. John. I'm not sure how many KISS fans remember Mark. He was only in the band for a
month or two and something painful happened to his hands so he couldn't play anymore.
Anyway, he got mixed up with drugs, ended up in jail where he got beat up several times and died frm

a brain hemorrhage after overdosing on meth in 2007! What a shock! I met him at a KISS convention
in 1999 and he was so nice! Somewhere I have a picture of us together! So I've met Mark St. John
and Bruce Kullick and have pictures of them somewhere but I also had my pictures take with Gene
and Paul on separate occasions but both times my camera didn't work and I ended up with blank film!
Anyway, back to the subject of that book. While I was reading it I felt like I was having one of the worst
headaches of my life and I just had this creepy, nauseated feeling. It wasn't enough just to throw it in
the garbage. I had to actually go and get up and take it out of the house! It's in the garbage can in the
garage. No sense taking it back for a refund because I'd already underlined several things and written
in various places and besides Dave had got this book on sale dirt cheap and all sales were final.
Anyway, I don't know if Mark St. John or Eric Carr are up there but if you see them tell them I said
hello.
I got the dishes done more quickly than I thought I would, while listening to Lenny Kravitz. Dave and I
had a lovely dinner last night. He made meat loaf with mashed potatoes and peas and we had
cranberry sauce with it. Cranberry sauce goes just as well with meat loaf as it does with turkey. Our
previous attempts at cooking turkey have been epic failures. I think this has got to have been one of
our best Christmas dinners ever.
Tomorrow we have to get up early because we are meeting Mark and Janette at Union Station and
heading up to the Light Box to see the Stanley Kubric exhibit!! And we're probably going to go
somewhere nice for lunch, probably Jack Astor's. I don't think Dave would like the new menu at Lone
Star Texas Grill. You know how he is about BEANS!!!
Dave's dad and Marnie are having their traditional family dinner at their house on the 28th.
And then Dave and I actually have an invite to a NEW YEAR'S EVE party!! Dave didn't want to go but
I'm happy to say I've managed to persuade him. We haven't gone out for New Year's Eve in YEARS!!!
I think the last time must have been at least a decade ago when our church had that service and then
everyone went to North End Bowl. It was kind of boring. I seemed to be the only one interested in
Karaoke singing. But I had fun on the bumper cars and we were nearly the only ones in the arcade. It
was impossible to get a taxi home that night so we were lucky we ran into the pastor to give us a ride.
This year bus service is free on New Year's Eve and I hope it is extended!!
The party is at Mel's place. I've been to a few parties there within the last year or two. I think it's nice to
be invited to a party for a change. Usually we've just spent New Year's Eve at home. And although
much of 2014 kind of sucked at least it didn't suck enough to want to give it the bum's rush the way I
wanted to in 2011.
2015 promises to be a big year. I look forward to the next NCA convention and the possibility of going
to LAS VEGAS with Janette sometime in late November-early December. I want to make a list of all
the things we want to see and do while we are there. Patrick, one of the guys in my AS support group
has been to Las Vegas many times and knows how to find dirt cheap package deal!! He's been able to
get both the flight AND room for only $400 for the week.
Well, that's it for now. All the best for 2015 and give my regards to Coco, Rags and Hugo. I don't care
if it's not mentioned in the Bible. I kind of find it hard to believe that our animals aren't in heaven with
us too!!!
Love,
Margaret

Best of 2014
Janette's 50 Birthday
https://www.scribd.com/doc/198558011/Janette-s-50th-Birthday-Adventure

My 50th Birthday
https://www.scribd.com/doc/235587576/Glorious-Guelph-Trip

My visit with Sharon...August

The New York Trip, September

https://www.scribd.com/doc/243601162/Back-in-the-New-York-Groove
Anyway, that's all I can think of at the moment. Most of my blessings were mixed. It's been a crazy
year.
I'm about to end this issue kind of abruptly because things are kind of busy at the moment...

May this be a Safe,

Happy, Healthy
and Drama-Free
New Year!!!